The Golden Hour - A Daughter He Never Knew About?| The Golden Hour #21 w/ Brendan Schaub, Erik Griffin & Chris D'Elia

Episode Date: March 24, 2023

First, Spoiler Alert warning for "The Last Of Us" on this episode! The gang talks graffiti vs art, old school technologies, ridiculous fashion, Chris watching The Last Of Us just for Erik and Brendan, abandoned malls, adoption confessions from Nick and Kevin, cheeseburgers vs hotdogs at a BBQ and much more!

The greater question here is not about collecting alcohol, but just people that collect things in general. It's like this idiot in his shoes. You know what I mean? Yeah, idiot. Yeah. Yeah, because Chris doesn't collect them as well. Yeah, but you. So we're both idiots.

No, you have a thing where you'll come in and be like, oh, he's like. I just got these. I stayed in line for 75 hours. Yeah, we're against him. Yeah, you idiot. He has more shoes than me. You dude would have. He is.

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Because it is the Golden Hour. It's the Golden Hour. Speaking of comments, looks like I won. Oh, yeah? It's the Golden Hour about you know how he's like even somebody had a great comment yeah Brendan said three different arguments and then cleaned it up like yeah really I mean for you know what we talked about it for 35 fucking yeah you did look at the I was gonna bring it up again today I felt like it was pretty 50-50 I'm gonna go with Nick on this I feel like Chris Eric a little biased. Oh my gosh. I did have a question I wanted to ask you guys. Okay. 60-40 on the poll. Oh, you hit the poll.

But you gotta put 20% of those people absolutely hate me. So I could be like, are you kidding me? Don't you remember when I first got on this podcast? How it was like, you know, this guy's ruining the bucket. I think I'm more than hated. No. I'm the most guy's ruining the podcast. I think I'm... No, you're just a... No. I'm more than me.

Well. I'm the most hated guy on the internet. I don't know. There might be a Reddit someday. But I'm driving, and then I see graffiti. Yeah. And I'm thinking to myself... Also known as art.

Yeah. You're still doing that? Yeah. Yeah. Well, gangs, right? No, I just... What I'm saying is saying is like i get when there's no internet and there's no public uh a way of like so you want to show the neighborhood like this is my thing right get an instagram yeah yeah yeah yeah but they can trace that i know but what i'm saying is like who is paying attention is now it's just vandalism

right the whole idea that it's art now is like the art is supposed to be shared with people. Right? Right, right, right, right. So just people driving on the 10? Yeah. I think it began as like this is our neighborhood. But now then it became art and people were like we do graffiti because we want to express our art. And like look at this.

Look how we're making the places look cool. Yeah. And now you're like basically just get a canvas, spray paint it, and put it on fucking Instagram. Yeah. But it got your attention. That's like saying billboards don't work anymore. No, but it didn't get my attention for the reason that you think. I mean, I just, I'm not even talking about the art ones.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's just like a dude writing like, you know, 6845, you know, bunny rabbit or whatever. You're like, what? Yeah. Like, what are you doing that for? I like that shit. Having graffiti is like being a hooker that's on a corner. Yeah.

Like, really? Right. Now? Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Are you still doing that? Yeah, it's Radio Shack. You're done.

Figure out a different way. No, there's a need for some of it, though, right? It's Blu-ray. Not even Blu-ray. It's VHS. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, Blu-ray is still pretty good. I still-ray it's vhs yeah yeah like blu-ray is still pretty good i still put it in my uh my xbox you know what i mean right right but i'm old

but still i don't know i just i just was like are there's these things that like like it reminds me of a profession like um developing photos like that just went away right like nobody's doing that anymore you can you can go do it at thrifties or whatever yeah still do it but it takes a while but like who's doing that now my wife yeah or graffiti or is she doing graffiti yeah she's still doing this yeah no she's just like can you go to walgreens and pick up? And I'm like, oh, I don't even think about it until now. What the fuck, dude? We got printers and shit.

It's better to have the physical. I'm with your wife on this. If she's getting like good prints, man, that's what she's doing. Okay, well, that's fine. Why? That's fine. You want to get good prints. You want to run the Kinkos.

Can I be mad at it, though? I want to be mad at it. Yeah, yeah. I guess. I just don't think you're kind of spoiled, so you don't like doing things. Yeah. I'm pissed. I had to wake up for this.

You look tired now. No, I look... Do I? Yeah. Why would you do that? The vainest person in the room, why would you do that? Do you know why I look tired?

Because I took a fucking... I wash my hair. That's always making me look tired. I thought it was because you were about to be 43. I am, yeah. When's your B-Day? The 29th.

When does this come out? Thursday. What is today? Also right before my shows in Midland and Austin and Minneapolis where I'm shooting my special and also Milwaukee and Columbus and ChrisDelia.com. No, oops. ChrisDelia.com, Minneapolis, oops! ChrisDelia.com,

Minneapolis, Milwaukee, Austin, Midland, fucking Ohio. I thought you were shooting a special in Tacoma. No, why would I do that anyway? That's right, I'm there. This Thursday, Friday, Saturday. Tacoma Comedy Club. Right outside Seattle. Come on, bro. Know your geography.

I know, I never played Tacoma, actually. I played... Didn't you just do Spokane recently? No, did you? Mm-mm. It's close, they route that. Well, the same old comedy club owners. That's right, that's what it is.

That's like saying San Diego, LA is the same thing. No, but you would route it. Blue Room, April 12th through the 15th, and Louisville Comedy Club, April 20th through the 22nd. And I'm doing shows with my boy Matt Wright. When is that? That's going to be Friday, tomorrow, the 24th. When you do the Blue Room, are you bringing openers or features?

I don't know. Have them book the feature because they have this old guy named Willie. Oh, I know. He's 90. He's great. I love him. He's only going to be around another few weeks, but book him. Blue Room, where is that? Springfield, Missouri. Oh, great. Oh, dude. He's only going to be around another few weeks, but book him. Blue Room, where is that?

Springfield, Missouri. Oh, dude. It's the best. I've been there before. Oh, you have? Yeah. Willie opened it for you? Yeah.

He's legit 100 years old. He's on witness protection from New York in the mafia. Springfield's awesome, dude. Was this like a quilt from your grandma that you turned into a jacket? Oh, no. I'm just curious. No. Is that a kid?

That's cool. He wouldn't know. Of course I wouldn't know. He's'm just curious. No. Is that kids? It's cool. He wouldn't know. Of course I wouldn't know. He's sponsored by Land's End and Tommy Bahama. It's cool. It's a little long, and I know that's the style. I know. See, you like short because you're more like a pelican.

No, I have the long coat. Whoa, that guy is old, huh? Oh, he's old. I put him on my Instagram last year when I did that clip. He's so great. I thought it was a joke. He was around in the green room. He goes, I'll be doing 10 minutes.

I was like, yeah, can you imagine? And then he walked out because he can't hear. He walked out. The guy came and was like, did you meet William? I'm like, that old guy's the fucking feature? Like, trust us. People love him. How long did he do?

Like 10 minutes. And you had other guys, too, that you were doing? Yeah. OK. Yeah, he came on. He did 10. And then he didn't stay for the were doing? Yeah Okay Yeah he came on he did 10 And then he didn't stay for the late show He didn't stay for the late show Yeah because he rides the bus

Yeah he's out And he wakes up at 4am Because that's what old people do Yeah he was out He's great though Yeah that I want to go You know what I decide

That is a place I would go to To work on material for sure 100% Like the Blue Room Is that what it's called? Yeah Blue Room Like you know I did the theater and did my tour But dude I would go back to work on material for sure, 100%. Like the Blue Room, is that what it's called? Yeah, Blue Room. Like, you know, I did the theater and did my tour, but dude, I would go back to just post up and do, that place is awesome.

Great. Anyway, Eric, you don't know because you've never been there, but yeah. I have been there. No. Or hasn't happened. Is this new? Life rips.

ChrisLeah.com. Look at the back. I dig it. Yeah, it's new. Yeah, it's the newest shit. We have more shit coming out, though. AllLeah.com. Look at the back. I dig it. Yeah, it's new. Yeah, it's the newest shit. We have more shit coming out, though. All right, be cool. You know what I mean.

But other than that, it's just. What is that? The stock rising, dude. Hey, but. So how are you guys? Dude, you know what, man? We should be more like The View, honestly. And just fucking really like, you know, just

like ask each other how we are and what's going on and talk about pop culture. I thought you were going to get kicked off for anti-Semitism. What happened there? Or is Eric going to start farting like Whoopi Goldberg? Oh, yeah. Just fart. Yeah. So wait, what's up with-

Submits sentence. So? Don't be on TV, bitch. Can't be farting on live TV. Yes, you can. If I couldn't control it. Hold on a second. I'm not ready.

Larry King did. You're not old enough. Not quite old enough. Dude, if I was that old and I couldn't help it, I would put a mic down there. Yeah. Fuck it. The fart mic. It would just come out.

Then you hear, bing. You know what I mean? That's what Whoopi does. But remember Larry King used to do it, like mid-conversation. Who? Larry King. When he got way older. Well, how about she's getting known for farting?

How about she's getting known for farting and her name is Whoopi? That's hilarious. I mean, it writes itself. It's action, yeah. We ask about, I don't know, we talk about stuff. I know, we do, we do, we do. I was in, I just went to, shout out to my wife. Rachel was walking in Fashion Week in El Paseo in Palm Springs.

How did she do? I didn't go. Oh, you didn't go to the thing? No, I didn't want to go. So what'd you do then? I just played video games in the room. Yeah, you did, dude. Let me tell you something.

It was actually the perfect trip. There we go. Because I had spent time with her. Then she leaves. Oh, I play video games. She comes back. We have a good time. We go to have a great dinner.

He's like this. He's like, sweetie, how'd it go? Yeah. Yeah'd it go yeah yeah perfect gets back on the call yeah great dude yeah fucking stupid piece of shit some 14 12 yeah she keeps me like my actually it's good because i don't get crazy because she's in a room like no no you know because i was like what the fuck you know she's like hey hey i'm in here so now, she heard the way the kids talked to you on there? Not bad. No. So when you say, okay, I have a question.

So when you get that mad and you're in your game, I mean, you're in your bag playing, right? Yeah. And she goes, hey, what feelings do you have? Okay. The first time this ever happened, I remember I'm in my office. Newer relationship probably at this point. Yeah, yeah. We weren't living together yet.

And then she yells at me. She comes in the room like, yeah, you're what? You're pure love, blah, blah, blah. And I was like, all right. Next day I went in and I was like, hey, hey. Oh, it was on your mind the whole night. I love it, dude. Yeah, and I was like, hey, don't talk to me

like that. So, I get enough of it on Twitch. I would like to say, hey, I don't want to be talked to like that where I pay the rent. Here's what I want. If you're telling me I'm too loud, then you can come to me. Let's have a discussion about

like, hey, you're being too loud because I'm trying to sleep. And I can respect that. But don't come a discussion about like, hey, you're being too loud because I'm trying to sleep. And I can respect that. But don't come in and talk to me like you're my mom. One warning, bitch. I have to say it again. One like that. One warning.

I didn't say that. But the vibe was. Look at my face. The vibe was like. One warning. But by the way, I think in any relationship, when you have moments like that, you should address it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, I think you should address it.

Because then what? I'm going to be like having her be resentful. I'm going to be resentful every time she does. Or she's going to be mad at me that I'm talking. Has she done it again? No. But also, I respect, oh, she's sleeping. It's late.

Yeah. Okay. But wait, hold on. But back to my question, though. And I thank you for saying that. But how do you feel? What I saying is now i know it's i'm okay now but i'm saying initially when that first anger i was like oof i'm already dealing with 12 year olds yeah yeah you know what i mean and cheaters on this game yeah yeah so but now i just go like you know

we're in the room and by the way we were there for her. You know? Oh, then. Yeah, yeah. Like, it promised me. She's like, this is, you know, you're supposed to be helping me. But how do you know it goes well? Was she like, I messed up the turn? That's so funny you said that because she said that to me.

She was like, oh, I turned the wrong way. You know? And she was like, but I was like, oh, I'm sure nobody was like, this is ridiculous. She was, she's great at it. Yeah. Oh, cool. You know what I mean? When I see her, like, I'm sure nobody was like, this is ridiculous. She's great at it. Yeah. Oh, cool. You know what I mean? When I see her, I just go, damn. Sometimes I look at her and go, how did I get this?

You get that strut, though. Yeah, she has a great walk. All the people like her. Her body type is perfect for that stupid fashion stuff that nobody will ever wear this stuff. You know what I mean? I've seen her in some, I've got to send you pics for another time. Ridiculous outfits. Yeah.

Well, that's what – you know what? Everyone always makes fun of the fashion shows. I'm like, nobody would ever wear this. That's not the point, though. It's art. That's strictly – that's like graffiti. Yeah. But still, don't be putting all that stuff on people, right?

It's so ridiculous. Does she ever keep any of it? No. No. They don't keep no no the stuff will be like twelve thousand dollar yeah right right it's like a fucking quilted you know dude one time but then like then like kanye got into this stuff right there was that one show with balenciaga where they're wearing trash right right, right, right. The show was lit. But that's just for eyeballs. How about they're walking in mud? That's just, yeah.

No, remember they wore it and then Kanye had them wearing White Lives Matter, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. And that's just for the shock. Right. Yeah, I know. It's not about fashion. Guys, let's take a little break.

Let's talk about the Patreon we got. It's a special thing, Chris. Yeah, dude. Patreon, baby. us and the goldies what do they call i like the goldies yeah um it's it's a rip-roaring time you know what the last episode we uh or this episode coming up right we have a guy who ruined his relationship with his friend broke the guy code it's a tough one it's been three years and he can't get over it and we feel for him yeah but if you are A Patreon member

We appreciate you And you have the opportunity To send in a message Or come on live With us While we film Every week Every week

So we want to talk To all 9,000 of you If you're not a Patreon member Come on in And send those submissions You're going to get on We want to talk to All 50,000 of you

All 1,000 million of you We have a fun time Talking with you We always get a really good interaction And we want to talk to all 50,000 of you. We have a fun time. All 1,000 million of you. We have a fun time talking with you. We always get a really good interaction, and we want to talk to you. So become a member. Hell yeah, dude. Patreon, stay golden. Patreon.com slash the Golden Hour Podcast.

So speaking of fashion, we got sent something. Nick got sent something here. The new, what do you call it? Golden Hour uniform. Carhartt. That should be Golden Hour uniform. Carhartt. That should be our official uniform. Carhartt beanies as a jacket. Now, you know they're coming out with Carhartt

collab Nikes. They're doing Nike Carhartt shoes. Are they really? Yep. A collab, a dunk. Eric, you need to get that. Yeah, because then I'll just never find my wallet. Keys, yeah.

You're just like, oh, where's my... Look at the fucking hat shorts, dude. That's terrible. Dope. That at the fucking hat shorts, dude. That's terrible. Dope. That is so terrible. No, dude. But to be real, you wouldn't wear that, right? No.

The hat shorts? Yeah, okay. Wow, that's so bad, dude. If it wasn't hats, it would look cool. Agreed. The patches look cool. Yeah, the patchwork is dope. But the fact that they're hats?

What are you talking about? You have all these beanies that you don't wear. So you put them all together and you make pants. When you have lemon, make lemonade or whatever the fuck. When life gives you hats, make shorts. But the jacket or the sweatshirt there. It's just a bunch of pockets. That's so stupid. They just cut up a bunch of shirts to make the one shirt?

I guess. Just the pockets. Just the pockets. Those are the pockets, yeah. I mean, that's a very expensive jacket. You wouldn't need to even have a wallet. No. Well, it'd be funny to... You could put a credit card in each thing.

What would be funny is to do that and still put your wallet in your back pocket. Yeah. Or be like, ah, fuck, I hate when I wear these pants that don't have pockets. Well, I mean, who could wear this? I mean, no one in... Maybe Chris. Chin. I feel like Chris would pull it off.

You know what would be cool is... Hold on. I'm the new Whoopi. Now I'm hot. I thought for sure you'd be here. Well, you couldn't do it. I pulled through, bro. Wow.

Yep, cereal last night. That makes the show great. Cereal? Why was it so long? I only do long ones. No, Whoopi says bass, which I enjoy. Yours are... My shit, I'm a falsetto.

Ugh. A falsetto. Ugh. A falsetto? My shit is basically 525,600 minutes. Why'd you fart like that? My shit is... Your shit is like... No, it's... Yeah, dude.

And I farted. I knew it wasn't going to be a... Ruined my day. No, it's okay. Made mine. What cereal did you eat? I do a blend of Cheerios and Honey Nut Cheerios. Why don't you just do all honey?

I'll tell you why. It's too much. Dude, you put a little... That's the trick. You know what? a blend of Cheerios and Honey Nut Cheerios. Why not just do all honey? I'll tell you why. It's too much. Dude, you put a little... That's the trick. You know what? Dude, you're the kind of guy that does peanut butter and jelly and you think the move is

to put too much jelly and it's not. No, no, no. No, no, no. And we're done with that conversation. You do more peanut butter. You do more peanut butter. You do, you do. All right, you know.

Then you throw some cheese on it. Ew, dude. Yeah. What do you say? And whoopies back. You put cheese on it. Melted cheese too. Really take it. Anybody here dude. Yeah. What do you say? And whoopies back. You put cheese on it. Melted cheese, too. Really take it.

Anybody here? You ever had melted cheese on a peanut butter jelly sandwich? Bro, try it. No, I won't. Just try it. Just try it one time. You're going to see. ChrisLead.com.

ChrisLead.com. When you have a cheese plate, okay, and it has like figs, grapes, cheese, prosciutto, crackers, and there's jelly there. You've never, you know? I have. No, I haven't. Sweet and salty? Try it.

That kind of looks amazing. Thank you! It does look amazing. Well, now I'm hungry. Yeah. Apologize. That's delicious. Apologize.

Have you ever had a peanut butter and jelly Hamburger Peanut brother Boom Public school That sounds weird Restaurant public school It's delicious But it does sound weird

Admit it No it doesn't Do you like Thai food Do you like Thai food Actually I don't I almost choked and died When I ate Thai food When I was a kid

Then I understand And my parents Didn't do anything about it And I got really upset And I never ate Thai food again They realized one i understand and my parents didn't do anything about it and i got really upset and i never ate again they realized one was my parents that just meant they liked matt better wait so on all your burgers you do that or no no no i'm just saying there's a couple times you'll have it but i'm saying if you have thai food they have peanut butter sauce okay yeah thai restaurants yeah and then that goes on chicken so you're're telling me. Right, yeah. Okay, so peanut butter, it's not out of the pocket.

It'll be stupid, Chris. Well, what's out of pocket then? I don't know. You can fucking sprinkle Pepto-Bismol on it. You feel dumb, farty pants over here? Pepto-Bismol. I'm saying, well, what's out of pocket? Just cut to the chase.

Whatever, dude. Pepto-Bismol ice cream? Why are you shaking your head over there? Like, I'm crazy. Yeah, well, you are. What's the hot game, the video game right now? I don't even know. Oh!

Harry Potter. I reviewed them. I'm not going to get into it, but I reviewed it on my podcast. Congratulations. So you can check it out. You know what I mean? But I finished The Last of Us for you guys. For you guys.

Can we talk about the ending? For you guys. Can we talk about the ending? So how did you feel? We can talk about the ending. We can talk about the whole thing. I would say, what would you do? I did a review.

What would you do? The ending. What would you do? Do you rescue the one girl or do you let her die to save humanity? I thought about this. And there's a chance. It's not a 100% chance. First of all, you go down the list.

Here's the thing you think about. So for me, it's just me and Rachel. Do I kill Rachel to save the world? Okay. I don't know. I get it. Maybe I don't, right? Right, right, right.

But it's like Calvin, Kristen, everybody's dying. Yes. Yeah. And there's no question. There's no question. Everyone's dying. And you have to kill everybody that knows that Calvin's the cure. Pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop.

Holding Calvin. She like this. Don't look, buddy. She like this. Yeah, done. Dead. Everyone's dead. Yeah, see, it's a weird dilemma.

I think it's easier if you have kids. No, no, that's what I'm trying to say. I mean, that's the thing. But the guy was like, he was remembering his daughter, and he was like, no, I'm not going to let this happen again. I didn't do anything last time. I'm doing something this time. But where it gets tricky, it's not his daughter, is it? It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter at that point.

And I'll tell you why. Let me tell you why. At that point, they've known each other for three weeks. But here's the deal, though. And I understand what you're saying. But he's got all the trauma from him losing his daughter. And now it's not just about oops. Now he's got all the trauma from him losing his daughter. Thank you. And now it's not just about oops.

This is obvious. What? This is obvious. Your point's obvious. No, no, no. But now it's not just about it's blood, but this is in a way deeper than that

because it's all about his trauma, which I really liked about that. I liked the last two episodes and it solidified it. it solidified me being like, okay, I'm going to watch season two. But the first six. Hold on, hold on, hold on. And what's this all about, dude?

You're a church later? Yeah, because your ass was always like, oh, I watched the first three. And you kept saying zombies. Congratulations. I'm going to be in Pittsburgh or whatever the fuck you do. You were wrong, bitch. What? I was not wrong about fuck you do. You were wrong, bitch. What?

I was not wrong about the first six episodes were okay. The gay episode? It was okay. Oh, dude. As a whole. Homophobic. Was really great. Stupid.

I think there should be more gay people in the show. I think the zombies should be like. I think there's enough gay people in the show. I'm coming. Dude. I'm coming. I'm coming out Dude I'm coming

By the way Why isn't that The song for Like Gay Pride every year It is It is Yeah I think it is That and YMCA

Yeah And Lady Gaga And Lady Gaga But I'm coming out It is It is It should be more though I agree with you

But yeah I said the first six episodes Were okay and they are. No. They're better than okay. They're better than okay. They're not. First of all, look at the whole thing now.

The whole series? The whole series has like an arc and everything that's happening. That's what you really are. That's what it's about. Yes. I understand. It's better than The Consultant because The Consultant went like this. It is better than The Consultant.

Yeah, it's better to go like that than like that, of course. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But however, there were two episodes that completely didn't matter. And it was the gay episode. No. And then the other gay episode. He doesn't get it. And that is the truth.

We're in the mall? I'm not homophobic. We're in the mall? I think more people should be gay. You're homophobic. No. I think that they should be gay. No, no, no.

The second episode. The gay one that we're going to kiss? The second gay episode was about, you know, what happened to her. Her trauma. We need to know her trauma. We need her backstory. Because she also didn't get to save her friend. She made a choice. I understand.

She lost somebody. I understand. That came to fruition at the end. Thank you. However, it was a long hour of having to watch that. Nobody's really doing anything. You could have done that in half an episode and had some banging Chico on the other half of the episode.

You know what? I'm with you. My thing is like, we're going to have one zombie in a zombie show? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just one. Right. One zombie. Like, they in this mall doing all this stuff during a zombie apocalypse.

Here's my one issue with the show. Then we'll move on from this. Well, there was more than one zombie in the- No, no. But in that episode, I'm saying. But this is my one issue with the show. This is supposedly 20 years later. 20 years later?

People will be zombied out. No, I'm saying the mall's still intact. Right, right, right. There's like glasses. There's 20 years. Nobody found that tampon box. Right, right, right, right, right. That's when I just kind of go, okay.

I saw the abandoned malls. I saw abandoned malls. I went on YouTube. For some reason, kind of go, okay. I saw the abandoned malls. I saw abandoned malls. I went on YouTube. For some reason, it came up on YouTube. It was like abandoned malls in Ohio. Were they filmed? And it's been 20 years. No, no, no, no.

It was just literally a thing that came up for no reason. And it was on Vice. And I watched the fucking thing, and it's crazy to see. I'm going to fucking. He's farting. He's sneezing. Now it just looks like I'm going to fucking... He's farting. He's sneezing. Now it just looks like I'm going to cry. Did the fart hit you finally? No, no, no.

I was going to sneeze. You know when you say, I'm going to sneeze, you don't sneeze? Fuck, that's so annoying. But anyway, so anyway, it was fucking crazy to see these malls in Ohio.

There's so many. Dude, malls were so big in the 80s. Like, they got so big. They started in the 40s. They got so big in the 80s and then online happened. Malls are gone. You saw Foot Locker is getting rid of 400 stores. And going online, right?

I don't know about that. More focused online. Well, I mean, probably. It's also Foot Locker. I know, I know, I know. Well, also I think the issue too is that these malls, they're price gouging. You ever hear these stores talk about how much their rent is? When the malls were really kicking, it was the rent. Right, right, right.

Plus, they had to give a percentage of sales. Just to be in the mall. Yeah, just to be in. Yeah. So now they're like, why am I paying you $40,000 a month for this? Now all those malls are turning into, like, they're tearing them down and building up apartments and stuff. There was one in Ohio that the mall was gone. There were still some

Shops that opened Some days Sometimes Hell yeah And there are Check this out 25 churches In the mall

They just became churches 20 fucking five Like a sharp image Is a church now They go walk in Whatever they were There was an old beauty salon Yep

The church was still there. Yep. The chair's still there. And the Lord said. Yeah, dude, 25 churches in this. There was a beauty salon church, and this woman's like, come on in. Beauty salon church. Yeah, it used to be a beauty salon, and now it's a church. It's crazy weird, dude. It's crazy weird in Ohio, of course.

All right. Yeah. What are you doing? Anyway. This is old Hollisters are being turned into like escape rooms and aquariums. Hollister was always weird. It was weird. Yeah.

Why do you say weird? Why do you say weird? Weird. You say weird, and it's weird, right? Weird. You say weird. Weird. Do we wear it?

We don't wear it, right? Yeah. It's weird. It's very. It's very... Hey, can you tell us about Ohio again? Dude, it's good, especially for my fan base in Ohio. I'm going to be there in Columbus and Cincinnati. Chrisley.com, May 6th at 7.

Thank you. It's like our conversations are probably real conversations. It's just like he's waiting to... He fell into it. The whole reason why I told them all stuff is because I want to come back and talk about my dates it's fucking true that feels weird alright dude

okay let's do it is this guy not talking yet he's Croatian oh hell yeah dude toughest people on the planet

Nick if you need to censor this, please do it. Got to represent the top G, and I know that Nick is a fan, so I will write this. And pardon my Russian accent. I am from Serbia, so yeah. I have debate club for you guys. What's the best movie in the last five years

since we had the Oscarsars two nights three nights ago and that's brandon frazier the other most famous brandon in america wow i think that topic is kind of uh popular now and uh i know that eric is a movie buff and that Chris D'Elia is mad at Zack Snyder for a reason, but Zack is not in charge of DC anymore. They booted him also, so... Really? Yeah. You didn't know that? The Beat Club. What's the best movie in the last

five years? He's good. He's real good. Gold Gold. Gold Gold? That's some Serbian shit. Best movie of the last five years. I couldn't even say, man. The most recent one I saw was that All Quiet on the Western Front. That World War I movie is fantastic.

No, no, the best movie in the last five years. Okay. Like, to you. Yeah, to you, yeah. What's the movie you just saw? I would have to say when was Endgame? If that's in five years, then it would be that.

What? A Marvel movie, bro? Wow. Then it's Endgame. Without a doubt. Hands down. Try this, Eric. Because it built up for 12 years

to this great ending. It was fantastic. Hey, so let's say for you, not a comic book movie. Can you name another one? Yeah, a real movie. Yeah, like. That's a real movie. That's not the best movie in the past five years.

Well, according to the fucking box office. But that's not. No, dude. Well, give us a movie then, pretentious fuck. That one... Do you need to call Matt? Here, No Evil. Find out a movie about like a...

Here, No Evil was probably the best movie I've seen in the past five years. Here, No Evil? See, No Evil. What is it? Say, No Evil. Remember that fucking movie? The horror movie that I told you? Are you kidding me?

It was amazing, dude. That's stupid, though. That was just a movie you watched. What does that mean? It didn't come out in the last five years. It's probably already been out. I don't think so. Maybe.

But I wouldn't count. Speak no evil. I wouldn't say that. It was frightening and terrible. I can't think of movies in the last five years. What movies won the Oscars? Parasite was great. Parasite was great.

But Best? I don't know about Best. That's what I'm saying. Best movie you saw? I don't know. Licorice Pizza was great. None of these. Oh, I loved Doom. No, not Best. I know, know about best. But great. That's what I'm saying. Best movie you saw? I don't know. Licorice Pizza was good. None of these. Oh, I loved Doom.

No, not best. I know, but I loved it. I didn't like it. Oh, I loved it. Oh, Joker. Joker was fucking unreal. Unreal. It was all right.

Brian was in it. Oh, Once Upon a Time in Hollywood. No way. Not best half. Once Upon a Time in Hollywood. No, that was just all right. Great ending. Top five all time for me.

Dude, Joker. Can I tell you something? Batman was 13 in this movie. In which movie? The Joker movie. Frickin' The Joker is 48. Right. By the time he becomes Batman, this dude will be like, I'm coming to get you.

Yeah. But you said the end game. There's another Joker. You said the end game is your favorite. Also, dude, you always get fucking busy with the technicalities. Yeah, dude, just enjoy the fucking movie. How could he be here if this is happening? When did I do that?

When did I go like this? That's you, bro. Can we replay? When I went like this with the thing, and I went like this. You do it. This from the guy that didn't like the two game. Isn't that technical? No, it's not technical.

Wait, hold on. None of these. No, no. No, these are big. Tell yourself. Are you going too quick? Tell yourself. My eyes hurt.

My eyes hurt. It is, baby. End game 48. No way. Never it is, baby. Endgame 48. No way. Never going to see it. Never going to see it. Never going to see it. Nobody saw it.

Nobody saw it. Keep going. I don't care. That was pretty good. Actually, Spider-Man No Way Home was pretty good. You saw that. It was so bad. Are you kidding me?

That movie was fantastic. I would turn on a little bit of it. Oh, Lola is the worst movie in the that. It was so bad. Are you kidding me? That movie was fantastic. I would turn on a little bit of it. It was, oh, La Llorna is the worst movie in the world. It's so bad. Dolomite? It was okay. Well, whatever. It was okay.

What is this list, Nick? Movies last. Can you go faster? We can still read it. Well, he said go slow. No, no, no. He's being sarcastic. You're still going fast. You're still going very fast.

It's hurting my eyes. I hear that triangle sadness is funny. All right, whatever. He's being sarcastic. You're still going fast. You're still going very fast. It's hurting my eyes. I hear that triangle sadness is funny. All right, whatever. Mid-summer is good. This is the top 200 critically acclaimed, so there's a lot of shit on there. Oh, oh, oh. Keep going up. Go up.

Go up. No, no. Right there. Onward? No, no. The one above it. Titane? That shit is bananas.

I watched a half of it. Turned it off. She fucks a car. I know. That's why. Turn it off. She fucks a car. I know. That's why I turned it off. She did what? She had sex with a car. I'm out.

Spoiler alert. I'm done. It's not really the first half hour. I was like, I'm done. I can't watch this. Yeah, but she has a baby. A car baby? She has a car baby.

I didn't watch that. The car has a baby? The lady that makes that, she makes a lot of weird movies. A director. I know. She's a weirdo. I know. But that was the most bizarre movie I've ever seen.

I did her whole review of it on Riffin. I heard it's great. You and Calvin haven't watched Onward? No, it's good. Oh, it'll bring a tear to your eye. It's good. That's what they do with those kid movies, man. You're crying, you don't even know. Especially if you have a brother. Oof.

So I don't know. I would say that Speak No Evil thing affected me the most. God, dude, you got to live. Past five years. You got to start living. Ooh, this is Brendan after a bee sting. And this one's like a minute and a half, and I do think it's worth it.

I shortened it down. Okay, it's a minute and a half. The guy's got a hat that says top. This is you. You better keep it together. This is the ghost of Chris. This is more Bad Break, and that's me. What's going on, Golden Hour crew?

It's Javier here, and that's me. What's going on, Golden Hour crew? It's Javier here in San Antonio, Texas. I got a sour power. So first of all, I'm not an alcoholic. How do you feel about collecting whiskey and bourbon? I think I'm just going to go ahead and pull myself up one of these. Oh, get some sip on it, daddy. Recently got this sucker in

here in San Antonio recently. I have to say. Get that Chris. You sell it on your site? This is my 10-year-old son. Who's your favorite character from King of Sting and the Golden Hour and all that? Chris D'Elia.

He's a damn character, isn't he? He is. Yeah, we tried to put Chris' show back in February in San Antonio for Majestic. Before buying his ticket, we asked to see if he'd be able to actually make it since he's a big fan. They said no, they wouldn't let him in. Ten-year-olds can't go.

What we do now is we basically go on walks every day and we listen to Fighter and the Kid, listen to The Golden Hour, we listen to Congratulations. Riffin was a Riffin. Riffin was Riffin. Riffin. Podcast. Riffin.

Anyways, dude, you want to do a little cheers here? Sure. Sure, I'll drink some, Dad. Look what he's got. He's got the dang Coke Zero. Don't mix those. That's so cute, man. I don't like this family.

Yeah, they watch Riff Riff with Griffin, bro. Anyways. Oh, he's cute, man. Buzz Buzz. Soar. Oh, now you like him. All right. Bro, that kid's cute as shit.

I think the greater question here is not about collecting alcohol, but just people that collect things in general. I think that's the greater question. Like, what do you think about that? It's like this idiot in his shoes. You know what I mean? Yeah, idiot. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, because Chris doesn't collect them as well. Yeah, but you. So we're both idiots. No, you have a thing where you'll come in and be like, oh, he's like. Yeah. I just got these. I stayed in line for 75 hours. Yeah, you fucking idiot.

He has more shoes than me. Nah, you fucking idiot. He has more shoes. You got the fucking ones over there with the gold. Yeah, you dumb fuck. You don't collect anything, Eric? You don't collect, like, Tom Muhammad shirts or something? Maybe. Actually, You don't collect anything, Eric? You don't collect like Tommy Obama shirts or something?

Maybe. Actually, I don't. There isn't anything that I go, oh, I have to have. You know what? You seem like you would collect things. I don't. You seem like you sell cards on eBay. No.

You don't collect like the action figures? No, nothing like that. You're a stupid fuck. Yeah. Wait, hold on. Hold on. Let me tell you something. Wow. Yeah, you stupid fuck. Wait, hold on. Hold on. Let me tell you something. Wow!

Yeah, you have those. Yeah. You have a bunch of them fucking dumb fucks. I bought R2-D2 from you, bitch. No, I have a bunch. You guys remember Edwin San Juan, the comic?

Yeah. He's a big Star Wars collector. So I remember going to his place a long, long time ago. He has a room that is just covered. Really? Yeah.

Just like little action figures, everything. So there's people like that. I'm not, I don't have anything like that. So, okay. Nothing. That surprises me. All right.

So if you, if somebody gave you a Hulk action figure and then, and also a Spider-Man one, what would you do with them? Nothing. Yeah. Oh, wow. You wouldn't set them up? No.

Set them up? Like a one on a lazy suit. You wouldn't set them up no set them up like it went on a lazy suit no i'm not i just no that's interesting yeah when i was a kid i used to collect comics i collect comics like a motherfucker you know i i get rid of a lot of my shoes oh stop so i i do i just got rid of about 10 pair what How do you get rid of them? What do you do with them? I gave them to either friends or... You leave them in hotel rooms. No, I do sometimes, yeah.

With congratulations merch. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or I just give them to, what's it called? The, you know, some of the army or something. Yeah, Goodwill. I don't know if I buy them. So I don't... No, I really do.

So I don't know if that count is collecting, right? You still collect. It's because you gave 10 away out of 500. I do, I do. that so i don't know i really do so i don't know if um that count is collecting right you still collect because you gave 10 away out of 500 i do i do i think wait i think there's a difference here i think you like new things yeah you're right okay i like new things no you like to collect shoes there's a difference i collect shoes i can't say i don't collect shoes yeah but i i do i don't know i like to have a i don't know how many i have like how many do you have i can't tell you because i have i need you guys to take videos okay well i i next episode i need you to go into your like i took shoe room or closet or whatever you have just send it to you

so you could play and i need you to you know and i'll tell you if i have more than you you do now at this point because i got rid of a bunch you You do now for sure. We need a shoe count. I want a shoe count. I would have to do a new count because I have it, man. You got organizers? Okay, here's the thing, though. Do you ever go into the closet, you see a pair of shoes you haven't worn in six months, nine months, a year, two years?

Yeah. Okay, then you have a problem. Yeah, you're right. Yeah. Okay? If you haven't worn the shoes in like two years, then what do you have them in there for? I just sent it to Colton. Yeah, that's what I did.

That's what I just did. I just got rid of a bunch. Yeah, you go, I don't wear this. Yeah. But I think he's like, oh, that's the such and such from some little guy who makes shoes. I guess that would be a collector. His company went out of business already.

More of a collector. That's what I'm saying. But you should see his closet, though. It's all thrown in and shit. He doesn't like... So that's another thing I get. So you're a Neanderthal collector? This guy just goes, oh, cool shoes.

But you're not like... Chris has them. But Chris has them and then you walk in and it's on like a mantle rotating. No, no, no. But I wear my new house. I wear all my stuff. No, I do too. I wear all my stuff. So you don't have ones that you haven't worn in two years? I do because I forget about them. I wear all my stuff. I do too. I wear all my stuff.

So you don't have ones that you haven't worn in two years. I do because I forget about them. We caught him! Again, this is just like last week's argument. He changes it. Alright, so here's me now. I got rid of a bunch. Who does this? Kristen or you?

My wife had organizers come and this is absolutely You know who's the most famous organizer? My wife had organizers come And this You're a monster Absolutely You know who's the most famous organizer Who used to do this Kim Kardashian Babe this is Litty

Yeah I like the pillows up top You paid for an organizer An arm And a leg. That's not cheap, huh? It fucking sucked. Of course it did.

And also you have to deal with this. The person being like, was it someone like this? No, no, no. So, Chris, here's what I'm thinking. No, no. Do you really need these? Chris, I'm thinking. I go in.

We kind of coordinate by. I go in and they go what do you need I go this this this this they said I was the fastest purger ever that they ever had I'm not having I don't want this you didn't have to Maria Konda you didn't have to be like thank you for all your pleasure

you've given me and then you threw it what is this it's the movie Overboard this is you and Kristen look at this this is you and Kristen. Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell. Look at this. Look at this. This is you and Kristen.

Oh, that's sick. Dude, that is us. Look at us. The hair. I need a shirt like that for sure. Now that I have so many tattoos, I would be so sexy. Does anybody collect anything in here? Nick, you collect human heads?

No. When I was little, I had Hot Wheels and wrestling figures. When you're a kid, you collect toys and cards. Yeah, but not now, though. Nick collects losing bet tickets. Not this weekend. Yeah, he won this weekend. He keeps them in an envelope.

He's like, ah, an envelope. He opens the door. He's like, oh, down the street. Jin, you don't collect nothing? I don't call collecting. Besides hoes? Obviously, audio gear, because I like saying it in the movie. And then fishing gear and camping gear.

So, but you use all that shit. Yeah. Here's the thing. I feel like if you use this shit, it's not really like, to me, it it like doesn't vibe with collecting collecting to me is like you set it up yeah you know like you have a room yeah yeah yeah like you know it's like in your life like the edwin said one thing is collecting yes right i i remember like i um um my buddy mike angriano i never say his name right so italian he's here we're on i'm dying up here together. He was in whatever that superhero movie. But anyways, he had a party

at his place, at his parents' place. And he has other brothers and sisters. So anyway, we walk into the living room and all his sisters, they're showcased in the living room like she graduated from Yale, that kind of thing. And I go, wow, I'm kind of shocked. You've been in a lot of movies and stuff.

He goes, all right. He takes me to a room, and his parents have a room that is just dedicated to – Yeah, there's Mike. Oh, yeah, he was great in that. Yeah. I'm dying up here. And so they have – to the point where they even gave me merch. Oh, that's hilarious.

Before you go – so I'm saying like you like – if, you know, there's parents that do this kind of stuff. Are you going to be a collector of Calvin's stuff? Yeah, my dad has every piece of my merch. That's what I'm saying. Not even just merch, but like here's that macaroni thing he made and he's going to make it first grade. Here's like the thingy, you know, that kind of stuff. My dad has that in his basement. It's like all my Ultimate Fighter stuff, football jerseys, comedy, everything.

It's all posterized everywhere. Yes, that's what I'm saying. Yeah, I mean, I would do that with Calvin probably, yeah. You will for sure. Just make a website. You know what I mean? Yeah. Isn't that like graffiti?

Yeah. Golden Hour Podcast, what's up? We've talked to him before. Stevie O. Eric, Brennan, Chris, Chen. Still not a fan of Nick. No. Just don't follow Nick.

Wow. Didn't need that, man. Got a debate club this month. Kick you while you're down. There's no need for that. I just found out I had a 20-year-old daughter. Ha! So my debate club is...

Wait, you just found out about this? Yeah. Holy shit. How would you guys feel? I mean, we're all kind of the same age. I just turned 40. You guys are 41, 42. Just turned 40, dude.

Eric, you're like 60. This guy's throwing shade. Nick, I have no idea how old you are because I don't follow you. I have a child that you had no clue about. Dude, that's crazy. Anyway, yeah, that's my debate club. And Nick, I'll follow you. Oh, I'll see full circle.

He's a good guy. He's a good guy. He didn't mean to throw shade. You skipped all the. See if he followed you. That is tough. So 20 years goes by and someone's like, Dad? Depends how she's doing it.

She's like an addict. Well, here's what I'm saying. Needs money. Like, what are you? Well, I mean. You know what? If she needs money at 20, do it. Because they skipped all the first grade, second grade, third grade, fourth grade, fifth

grade, high school. But it's not his fault. He didn't know. Was it a one-night stand, though? You know what I'm saying? How did he get in the situation? What does that say about both people in the situation? Bad communicators.

It doesn't say anything about him. Maybe. We don't know. It could, I guess. You know, it could. He might have moved to Hawaii. It's better to, if you tell, okay. I think it's better to not, if you're not going to tell somebody,

it's better to end up telling them when they're 20 than it is when they're 12. Dude, I would be fucking crushed. Me too. If like somebody told me, oh yeah, you have a 13-year-old whatever, son or daughter, and then I miss those fucking 13 years it just if it's already if you're already at 12 yeah get it going 20 that's like then you're that's eric if you adopted let's say you adopted a baby like infant like a month old and it looks you know it looks like you but you adopt it's not your blood would you tell that

baby that kid when he's like five, he's adopted? I don't think you'd say shit. Yeah. Maybe when he's like 30, you're able to handle it. But growing up, I wouldn't. 20. Yeah, 20. Well, you have to make sure you're okay with it.

Because whatever your hang-ups are, you don't even realize you're putting that on. Did I tell you guys an example? I was going to host this show for, it was going to be like they were going to give people 23andMe. But anyway, the producer said to me that she had, like, she did it because she always had an issue with her mom. And she realized, found out from this that it wasn't her real mom. And then it was like, so you're talking about 30, 40 years of your life. You've had some kind of resentment going on, you feel. And now you find out that, oh, well, this is why.

So what I'm saying is if you aren't okay with it, then you do got to tell at a certain point or you have to get your shit together. If the kid wasn't athletic, I'm like, yeah, I'm not your dad, man. I mean, it's very obvious Calvin is my son. You're a monster. And it's very obvious that I am my dad's son. He is looking a lot like you, like crazy. Oh, he's spot on.

Yeah, it's crazy. Spot on. No, but that's something else, man. I don't even know. Listen, I've never met my father before, okay? And I'm not mad at my mom about it because I know as an adult now, people make choices based off whatever's going on. Because a lot of people get resentful later.

They'll be like, Mom, because sometimes women can be like that. They'll be like, you ain't never going to see. But I go like, but you made that choice for a reason. And what did your mom say to you? You know what? Now we can never talk about it. Call her, ask her. Call her, ask her.

Yeah, she won't even know what we're talking about. So who's this? Yeah. But I remember going to her when I was younger, but like in high school. And I was like, hey, what's up? Because I was starting to think about things like, well, I mean, is there cancer in the family? I was thinking about those kinds of things. But she got

really defensive, like, I'm your mom. I raised you. He's a graffiti artist. Yeah, right? But anyways, what I'm saying is, that would be tough now, imagine. Well, he's probably dead. Or he's Morgan Freeman.

He'd have to be yeah i'm sure you know what i mean so huh old willie 90 oh wow imagine you wouldn't want to meet your dad right now at this point now i mean i wouldn't mind at this point but it's like i understand i already have in my head like because i remember asking my mom about it when i was like at this time she she told me his name okay yeah and i was like okay then three weeks later i forgot and so in my mind i was like oh i mean that's you as a kid be like no no it's not that important correct but going to therapy i realized issues of abandonment have come up because of that but i didn't even but i didn't even know but here's the thing though

it's not like i was six and my dad went to get uh cigarettes and then never came back so i thought oh why would i but i realized he's from being around other people yeah you see people you see how dads are you see families and you go oh i missed out on that so it's like you know but going to therapy has really helped with eric is your mom white and your dad black or is it no no my mom i look just like my mom we're like mixed mixed like that. And then my dad. Actually, I just don't even know. I've never even talked to her about it. Oh, wow. Could be Asian.

Yeah. Well, not. I'm sure not. You never know. You know what I mean? He could be Mexican. He could be Mexican. Just a big Mexican.

No. Eric's Mexican, dude. It's not that for sure. But it is what it is. My mom's from like, you know, my mom's from, you know, Belize. You seem to handle it well. Yeah. He My mom's from Belize. He seemed to handle it well. He's 50, bro. Yeah, at this point you have to.

Oh, and all 50-year-olds have their shit together? No, but I'm saying they better. We're friends with Brian Cowan. Yeah, true. I had a sister reach out to me when I was 22 that I didn't know I had when she was 18 on Facebook. And she's like, I'm your sister. And it freaked me out. Rewind. Rewind. I think it freaked him out because at when she was 18 on Facebook. And she's like, I'm your sister. And it freaked me out. Rewind, rewind, rewind.

I think it freaked him out because at first he was like, okay. Who is this? She's like, hey, you sent me a dick pic, I'm your sister. Wait, so what? She's 22 and she's like, yo, Nick, I'm your sister? Yeah, my parents are mentally ill. My grandma adopted me and my two older sisters. And she had another kid,

and my grandma just did not have enough money to take her in, and she put her up for adoption. Wow. And my sisters knew about it. I didn't, but they've, like, reconnected. I was kind of weird about it. I kind of want to reconnect now. You should.

Life is short. Just the way you said it, though, just makes me feel like, man, it's like that must have traumatized her. But hold on, though. She had a great family. We always make fun of Nick. You're doing pretty good with all that trauma. Nick has the worst trauma here. Hey, we always make fun of Nick.

A slight gambling problem. You got a gambling problem and that's it? Nick's going to go home and just like Billy Madsen, just he has an assassination list, he takes us all away. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, Nick. You're doing pretty good. You know what we got to do? Hey, Nick.

Atta boy. Nick's crushing it, dude. He moved out here and was living in a car. If none of this happened, he'd be Jeff Bezos. You're doing pretty damn well, dude. Take it down, Rich. Take it down. Take it down. Take it down.

What? Jeff Bezos? Well, he's successful, I'm saying. I get it. Yeah, but there's plenty of other people. You have horrible trauma, Nick. You don't go to the top. Nick, Jeff Bezos is hot.

You beat Elon Musk. Not even Elon. Yeah, yeah. No, come on. That was the joke, though. God damn it, dude. You know what? We're literal.

Nick's fired. Maybe there's a 7-eleven like shift supervisor you could have been you'd own your own blockbuster uh nick but you uh did you have any resentment towards your parents because when did they give you up with their mental illness uh since i can i i'd never remember being with them i like honestly from it sounds like i should have trauma but i felt like i was like, honestly, it sounds like I should have trauma, but I felt like I was, like, shielded with it and, like, my grandma had a nice home.

I bet my sisters have a little bit more resentment because they were, like, they were through, like, turmoil and in and out of homes and this shit. But that's what I'm saying. That's what you want to do. Like, when you talk about if you're adopting a kid, that's the thing. The whole idea is, like, you shield them from this

so they can, like, you know. Because when they're not, because, you know, you hear about these people all the time that they're adopted and then once they find out they were adopted it's like this search they can't stop themselves they're like right i gotta find my mom and my dad and ask why did you do this or like yeah you know what i mean oh that's you over there god damn this room dude yeah chenna and chris the only one that grew up normal. Well, Chin was Asian, so. Chin wasn't a gang, though, so there has to be some trauma there. You know what I mean?

Hey, Nick, last serious question, though. Are you worried that you're going to have the same mental illness? Everything I understand. What if it was like, no, and neither am I. He's all, shut up. He's talking to someone behind his back. It sounds like once you get past past 30 you're kind of in the clear but it's always kind of i heard it picks up at 30 huh i heard it picks up early down the road

yeah early 20s and strong i i feel pretty good but it is kind of always in the back of my mind yeah yeah like you said i try to stick with gambling as my vice. It's not too bad. I mean, you just end up on the street. Yeah. Homeboy, you were adopted in the back too? Yeah. White family or black family? White. White family.

Yeah. It's the jackpot. Hell yeah. You won the lottery, my man. I mean, he's still here with us. We just said Nick won the, he said Nick was Jeff Bezos. Yeah. Why can't the black guy be?

No, because I'm saying he hit the jackpot, but he's still here in this room with us. Yeah, but so is Nick. I know, but Nick had so much fun. Why are you sitting like a toddler? Why are you sitting like a toddler? Guys, Nick's – Nick had so much fun. But Nick, you know. And I'll be streaming old UFCs on kick every day.

You have trauma being raised with a white family are you calling kaepernick in it because colin kaepernick's like that white family no not too much i mean my family my parents are still together had a great childhood just i never met my real parents so do you want to he wants to find him i'll fucking find him right now 23 and me but there wasn't really any results so i kind of just like put it to the side in the back of my mind say less i'll find him dude how funny is it if like they never told him he was adopted and he was like i got a question and they're like we don't know what you're talking about just white absolutely not why am i how did i you know how about colin kaepernick those parents are like you fuck ungrateful bitch.

Are they white? We took you in, yeah. They took him in. Now he's saying there was like racism and all that shit. Oh, really? Yeah, because he wanted cornrows. He's out of the public eye. Oh, he's so gone.

Yeah. Oh. He wrote a book on it. Wow. Okay. All right. He's the worst. Is he really?

He's the absolute worst. Yeah. Damn, that's actually rough. Let's talk about this guy's spray tan. Well, we He's the worst. Is he really? He's the absolute worst. Damn, that's actually rough. Let's talk about this guy's spray tan. Well, we've talked about this guy before. Let's talk about his fucking eyes. Yeah. Have we talked to him before? Mr. Steal Your Man.

He looks like he has on a Will Smith filter. Will Smith or Jared Leto eyes. You know what I mean? What's up, boys? Merrick from Orlando. Chris, I appreciate the compliment on the change, man. It's actually the same brand as this one, which is Bradley Martin's brand. Oh, nice.

It's actually his biggest competitor, actually. But I got like a golded or molded for you guys. Oh, I like this. As you can see, like my hairline is receding, bro. Yeah, but you got a good head. Like crazy. That matters. So, golded or molded, going to Turkey to getting a hair transplant.

Golden. What do you guys think? Would you go through that process or would you just shave it off and wear like hats and beanies, man? I wouldn't. I don't know. I slick my hair back, so I feel like it's part of my identity. But I also feel like maybe I could rock the bald look with the beard and shit. Definitely.

Yeah, for sure. I just don't want my shit to fuck up my game with all these Latinas here in Orlando. But either way, let me know what you guys think. I'm probably not going to take your advice regardless. I love it. Honesty. Yeah, you got a good head.

Let it go. Fuck it. And also let it go anyway even if you have a bad head. Here's the deal. Don't go to Turkey and do your thing, man. I disagree.

Really? My boy Calbo went to Turkey. He looks fucking fine now. Really? Yeah. In and out. They keep you awake.'s king king king king wake up boom you look like fucking kenny g you could convince me yeah but here's the thing though

then you have to find all new friends why or just you're like oh yeah you have to delete your instagram okay like all your pictures now it's like people are going to know. Well, how, how bold were you? Was, was he. Donald always shaved his head. So you don't know. He always had his head shaved. That's a good way to do it.

And then did it. And you're like, damn, you got a fucking Afro. And he was like, yeah, I just never let it grow out. Yeah. I don't know. I think that have confidence in whatever you want. If you feel like your hair represents your confidence and all that kind of stuff, then go do whatever you need to do to do that.

Or just like I think he's already thinking about it. Or just get it done and own it. Or just get it done and own it and be like, yeah, I went to fucking Turkey. What's up, bitch? Well, that's the way to do it. If you're going to do it, this is my suggestion. Shave it off right now. Rock it for a few months and see how it goes.

You don't like it? You go to Turkey. Damn, Eric is just old and wise. You really was. Eric ain't losing his hair. You really was. There was this time I thought I was, but I just had like... I know, but that happens though, right? Mine went back and then stopped going back.

And I'm just like, oh, okay. I guess this is where it is. You too? Yeah. But it's been like this, I feel like, for years. But I don't know. What? Really, Eric? You just farted again? You just came out and farted in the studio?

Didn't happen. Hey, whoopee. Yeah, just listen. One was cute. It was funny. Yeah, now we feel sick. Now it can't be like a thing that we do. You can't be fart boy. Okay, well, I'm going to start talking about

Honey Nut Cheerios and regular Cheerios. I do a mixture. I'm going to start talking about disgusting stuff every show now. Wait a minute. Am I the disgusting one this time? No, it doesn't, bro. He's lying. It doesn't smell. Wait. Just wait. He's lying. Look at that nose. His nose so big, people in it, they grab the smell. Yeah, it's going to that nose. You see Eric's nose. His nose so big, people, they grab the smell.

Yeah, it's going to hit me. I don't want to. Come on, let's get to this so we can get out of here. I got to go to the bathroom real bad. Hey, guys, it's AJ down in San Diego. That dog looks terrified. Another debate club for you guys. Oh, oh.

No, we're approaching summer here pretty soon. So it's going to be cookout season. So I want to ask you guys, debate club, are you going hot dogs or hamburgers? Hamburgers. That's what you guys have to say. Eric, I just missed you in Escondido. You were down here not too long ago.

But I did want to see you. I'll get you next time. Anyway. Otherwise, you know, gang, gang, buzz, buzz, soar. A-woo, woo, woo. Man, I missed you here in Escondido. Uh, you know,

didn't want to go. Anyway, burgers or hot dogs. I'm in La Jolla though, my man. Come to La Jolla in June. Comedy store. What'd he say?

That's not what he said. I missed you in Escondido. Sorry, man. Uh, my brain made me not want to go. Yeah, none of that part.

None of that part. Sorry, man. American Idol was on. None of that part. Sorry, man. American Idol was on. None of that part. You missed a great show. How about that? I'm sorry for all of you. But it's true, though.

Guy's one of the fucking best comics, and you missed it, dude. You're lost. Hamburgers. No, go ahead. Hamburgers and hot dogs. When I'm queuing, it's none of that nonsense. That's like for like if Calvin was coming, I would, you know, cheeseburger. Yeah, yeah. But I'm like. What's none of that nonsense. That's like for like, if Calvin was coming, I would, you know,

but I'm like, there's going to be a steak on there. What's up with it? What's up with it? If I'm going to have hot dogs, it's going to be like some sausages. What's up with it, dude? I'm going to do what I got to. Chicken, steak. I'm not queuing barbecue.

You need to come over for one of my burgers. Here we go. Cheeseburgers. Yeah, his fucking peanut butter and jelly burgers. No, there's no peanut butter and jelly. That's you. You like that shit. I know, but what I'm saying is everybody thinks they make the best burger ever.

He just goes, I mean, we could have it. Yeah. Dude, cheeseburgers. Yeah, cheeseburgers, of course. Nothing's better, bro. Best thing on earth. Nothing's better. So fucking American.

What are you, Russian, dude? so fucking American what are you Russian dude yeah dude with your steak with your fucking you wanna put some sriracha on it or some bullshit oh well yeah

yes you don't have sriracha in your kitchen of course we do then what the fuck are you talking about I don't put it on there nah not on the burgers dude

you gotta not on the burgers no no no no I mean I have but not I mixed the ketchup and the sriracha

disgusting yeah no it's not disgusting I don't know why the ketchup in the sriracha. Disgusting. Yeah. No, it's not disgusting. I don't know why they don't make sriracha. It's not American. Sriracha. They should make that, right? They do.

Yeah. There's sriracha ketchup out there. Yeah, there you go. Chin.com. Do they call it sriracha? Chin.com. Well, if they don't call it sriracha, then I don't want to hear about it. Hey, give me the next one because Chris smells like a fucking dead water buffalo.

That's not honestly. That's a fucking fault. You smell like dead water buffalo. That's not true. Thank God this is the Patreon episode. Right? Oh, no. Speak to Patreon.

Go over on Patreon. Like farting. Okay. I want you and him to have a headbutt contest. That's my hairline. That's my hairline. This is Noah from Nashville. I have a sour or power for you.

Taking a shit next to somebody else. Taking a shit. I don't like it. I hate it. At work, there's two stalls. I'll hold it. And nothing ruins my day more than when I'm trying to take a shit and somebody comes and sits down next to me. You just say, really, bro?

I move my feet over. I don't want them to see it's me. sits down next to me. You just say, really, bro? I move my feet over. I don't want them to see it's me. I eat a lot of protein, so I'm taking a lot of very, very stinky shit.

That's disgusting. That's more disgusting than what I eat. It shows off my whole day. Last week, I had the owner of the company come in and sit down next to me. Bro, I will straight up not shit and be silent. I will wait for you to shit and leave. No, okay, well, that's weird. I'll cough loud.

I'll even let that shit up leave. No, that's weird. I'll cough loud. I think it is a sour move to sit next to another man while he's dumping and try and let one out yourself. We got it. You know what disgusts me is that the airport, when the guys get off the plane or wait and get on the plane, they're all in line to just take a shit in the morning.

It's just a fucking line of shitters. When you gotta go go, you got to go. Yeah, yeah. You got to go. Yeah, I'm not the kind of guy that doesn't go when I got to go. I don't like. Oh, I'll hold it. When I was doing Workaholics, there was a bathroom, the men's room.

It was so quiet. Yeah. That you could hear the shit coming out of someone's ass. I'll play music. Even if it wasn't a fart one. It was just like. You can hear the. You can hear the shit coming out of someone's ass. Even if it wasn't a fart one. It was just like. You can hear the. There we go. And there's Eric.

In the 11th hour. So I would say, I would always complain about like, we got to get like a fountain or something in there. No, play music. Play music on your phone. Eric, that's so disgusting. I just hate because when you, if you hear someone sit down, you hear the belt buckle first. You hear the rustling of pants.

You hear the ooh, they're getting comfortable. And then there's a quietness. There's a quietness. And then you hear their forehead kind of go. And then all of a sudden you hear like a. Ew, dude. I hate that. One time I was in a bathroom in a Marie Callender's.

I hate this. I'm in a bathroom in a Marie Callender's. I had to go. It was just one of those, right? Why are we in Marie Callender's? I just was in Marie Callender's. You were there for five. I'm sitting there.

And, dude, it was one of those. Don't you hate when, like, you sit down and you know the bathroom's empty, but then you hear a couple people come in, and you're just like, God damn it. I know this is going to be. And dude, it was one of these. It was like, skubba-ba-ba, ba-ba. And this guy goes like this. I'll never forget it.

He goes, jam on it, man. Dude, I was hollering in the bathroom. I was like, ah! It's just the way he did it. Jam on it, man. And I was like, yes! Jam on it. Dude, that's hilarious.

But here's the thing. That's a goddamn hero. Yeah. That's where you shit, though, and fart. Jam on it. My buddy Jeff, he'll be at the stall. He'll be at the urinal. Jam on it.

He'll just fart. That's so funny, dude. Fuck, that's funny. Jam on it is great. Jam on it. That guy's a fucking superhero. I'll never forget that. It was my favorite shit ever.

Jam on it. And you probably felt kind of free. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was like, you know what? You know what? I'm about to jam on it. This dude's right. Thanks.

Yeah, Eric, you are one disgusting man. Oh, yeah. Bro, I farted this episode, and you're still the disgusting one. He beat you. But then it finishes with this. Ew. That almost made me dry heave. When you finish with the...

It's disgusting. You know what, dude? Jam on it, Doug. With a little bit of... Well, I'm going to be jamming in Tacoma this Thursday, Friday, Saturday. Jam on. We did a little bit of Well, I'm going to be jamming in Tacoma this Thursday, Friday, Saturday.

Jam on it, Brendan. When was this? What year was this? Oh, yeah. Workaholics. Oh, man. That shit was a different time, but

whatever. Jam on it, y'all. Tacoma, see you this EricGerman.com. Check me out. Louisville Comedy Club coming up. Yeah.rimmon.com, check me out. Oh, fuck. Louisville Comedy Club coming up. Yeah.

Springfield. And Springfield coming up. I'll be in Minneapolis and Austin and Midland and Krista.com and anyway, I gotta go to the bathroom. Jam on it.

All you Matt Rye fans, I'll see you tomorrow. Yeah. Thank you.