The Golden Hour - Bad Boys for Life | The Golden Hour PATREON #23 EXCERPT w/ Brendan Schaub, Erik Griffin & Chris D'Elia

Episode Date: October 18, 2023

Chris rants about people spelling his last name incorrectly and the guys talk Equalizer 3, favorite horror movies, take new live call-ins, give dating advice to an Alaskan girl, discuss drinking breast milk and much more! Get the full episode plus two extra episodes every month at https://patreon.com/thegoldenhourpodcast

We're friends that laugh, we're friends that shout Sometimes we don't know what we're talking about But that won't stop us Nothing can stop us It's like a show you used to love Just rebranded enough It's stronger, better, bigger power Cause it is the Golden Hour

It's the Golden Hour Shit, cause your baby comes when? No, I remember I had him. I thought you... No, I have two kids and that's it. Oh, she's not... Nope. Oh, thank God I didn't spill the news.

And yours is around the same time as mine. Yeah. There's no news. You can't spill news that isn't news. Yeah. For some reason I thought. It's okay. Oh, no, that's Callan.

It'll happen again. That's Callan. He's pregnant again. He's 60. Wait, he got pregnant again? Yeah. Did he admit it on the podcast yet? No, I found out because his wife told mine.

And she goes, oh, did Brian tell you that they're pregnant again? And I went, no, he didn't. Well, we can't tell people though here, right? No, I told Brian. He goes, oh, did Brian tell you that they're pregnant again? I went, no, he didn't. We can't tell people though here, right? No, I told Brian. He goes, oh yeah, dude, that's right. I understand. Are we at liberty to talk about it? Brian's talked about it.

Oh my God, I didn't know that. What a bad friend this motherfucker didn't tell me. I just talked to him on the phone. He goes, oh, I didn't tell you. I forgot. I'm a fucking idiot. That's so him.

You're a terrible person. That's so him. It's not terrible. Thank you, Calvin. It says more about you guys than it does about Brian. Bro, I talked to him. I knew. How the fuck would we know?

I'd have been pissed. You got to be over 50 to get that news. The only reason I found this is my wife's like, yeah, how about Brian have another kid? I went, no, he's not. She goes, I literally just talked to his wife. Next day, I see him at the podcast. I go, bro, why the fuck wouldn't you tell me your girl's pregnant he goes oh yeah that's right

he's busy with his new life now you know who I bet he told the other show he's on bet you that guy knows Crowder knows Crowder's probably the dad wait wait I just want to say this I'm the only person that thought that that guy was going to go to his wife and get him.

No, I didn't assume he was going to get out of his girl's tit for us. Nobody? Just me? I don't. Thank you. I might have thought of it, but I did not think that it was going to happen. Can you imagine? She's like, what?

What's this for? They could have done it like, you know, he didn't have to show. Yeah, true. Yeah. Yeah. Give me a second. He's all. Yeah, yeah. We just heard it oh damn that's hot yeah yeah oh god oh oh gosh i gotta go oh man hey guys i'll call you back phone drops he doesn't realize he's still on and we're like the whole the whole zoom is in them having a second baby he's just titty her

flume oh yeah babe so cool i get to suck on your tits you can just titty fucking her. Flum. Oh, fuck yeah, babe. So cool. I get to suck on your tits. You can't titty fuck your girl if she's breastfeeding. It will get milk everywhere. Just a thought. You'd be like, oh, it's hot. But, oh, man.

You're my kid. Well, you don't have the kid there. I know, but I'm saying, but later the kid is going to be. Oh, got it. Anytime you look at your kid, you're going to be like, oh, I came there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well. Right?

No. No. No. You'll get over it. I see what you're saying now. Now I finally get what you're saying. I did not get what you were saying until I got it. Nick, I feel like you'd suck on some titty milk.

If it was the mother of my child. What about if his girl was like, I let Nick do it? I think if Nick met a pregnant chick at Star Wars. I wouldn't purposely do it, but I honestly, who cares really that much? I don't care. I'm just not into it. I don't like dairy.

I'm not into it, but if you met somebody at a bar and brought them home, and then you were right. Fooling around. And then you sucked on her i don't swear but tits titties and then the milk went in your mouth i'd say get out do it yeah get out did you just have a baby and not tell me recently yeah well you do it but some girls can

make it without being pregnant right okay i'm a doctor so So say you do it and then you say, did you have a kid recently or whatever? And then she says, yeah, sorry. I thought I was done. My bad. Then how would you react? Depends how hot she was. Right?

Hey. Hey. Exactly. But that's the same. I thought you were being mean to me. No, but that's the same thing as you. That's exactly right, Brendan. You've never gone down on a girl and you have red lips?

No. No, no. Never? Never once. Well, I know black dudes don't go down on. But I'm half, so I'll be. So, to tell you that, can you lactate when you're not pregnant? Yes, it's possible.

No, we're not going to change the subject. We're talking about. See, I was trying to get out of that. No, we're not getting out of that. That's disgusting. I know Nick has done it. I have not done that. Never.

And I'm wondering if you knew. I didn't know. Huh? I didn't know. I was just doing it. And I came out and my fingers were bloody. You know what I mean? You smell metal a little bit.

No, I. I think. Are there a bunch of pennies in your bed? No, no, no, because it was like I was young, so she was young. Yeah, yeah, I get it.

And did she go, I'm sorry, I forgot. Did she go, I'm sorry, I forgot, it's shark week? No, there's no shame in it. If it happens, who cares? No, no, but I'm saying

it's the same as the titty milk thing. No, it's a little different because a girl might not know when she starts her period. Oh, did I start? Whoops, my bad. Right?

I feel sick. It's not like you knew you had breast milk and then the guy's sucking it and you're like, whoopsie-daisy. Okay, so what if you're eating at a girl and then you kiss her and then you suck on her titty and there's milk. Then you pull away and there's blood and milk because she just had her period. Check, please. And then you're like, what because she just had her period. Check, please. And then you're like, what do you do at that point? Check, please. Do you stop? What if it's like, how about this?

Okay. Okay. I'm hanging on. You're in it. Barely. So it's not like you just started. So you're like in it. You know what I mean?

You're in that intoxication. I'm hanging on. Then he's like, do you stop? Does the blood make you stop? No. Absolutely, yes. No, no, no. Yeah, me neither.

I wouldn't stop. Oh, I wouldn't. Yeah, it's disgusting. That's so weird. You have blood. Yeah. Not dripping out of my dick. I wouldn't be like, oh, I'm sorry, babe.

My dick. So you wouldn't have sex with your wife on her period? No. Oh, that's wild to me. Yeah. Oh, that's wild to me. Oh, you're wild to me. That's what's weird. No, it's just... Who cares?

What does it matter? What's the thing? What's the deal? That there's blood everywhere. Okay, so if you cut yourself and there's blood and you bleed, is that gross? And it drips all over my dick and I'm like, let's keep going. Stop talking about your dick. What's that situation?

What are you doing? You're cutting, you're making... She's talking about private parts. You're that situation? What are you doing? You're talking about private parts. You tell me if you stub your finger, you're going to stop having sex. So it's the fact that the blood is on your dick. I got blood on my dick because I fucked a corpse. Remember that? Yeah.

When DMX said that, you were like, wait a second. That's a wild motherfucker right there. I got blood on my dick because I fucked a corpse. Don't stop. Okay, so... So no bodily functions. You're out. I mean, shitting is... Some guys are into that.

I'm out. Dude, I'm out. Let the wind take the shoot. I'm out. This is on my desk at home all day. Who hits it? Me. I put my controller on it to shoot I'm out this is on my desk at home and this shit all day who hits it me oh look if I put my controller on it and I'm like I love it just all day that shit goes off I almost threw it the other day because it's like this fucking thing it would make the oops noise if you did it would hit yeah then that's what would happen I'd be like yeah yeah also it's a, yeah. Also, it's a blood. You're fine. Well, yeah. Even piss, I don't care.

So you're anal, and then you pull out, and it's just like covered in shit. Well, say. You put it back in, or do you just stop? Done. Eric is a freak. I know. I'm just asking. Eric's a scat babe.

I'm inquiring. You know, some women like squirt. I'm fine with that. I think some of that's probably a little piss. I don't care. You know how some women squirt? I'm fine with that. I think some of that's probably a little piss. I don't care. It's piss, yeah. But shit is... It's the smell, really.

It's the smell. It's the smell. Is it? Oh, is that? Is it? You know what's cool? The smell of shit just doesn't sit well with me. It's the smell that'll get you.

That's why you just put it back in and you just finish. Ew, dude. The drink meme? You already did it. Yeah, dude. You're knee deep in it. Yeah, but so you stop, though. No, you don't.

Yeah, after you finish. Ew, dude. We'll see you next time. Thank you.