The Golden Hour - Episode 113: Big Brown & Chrissy Chaos

Episode Date: March 19, 2021

Chris Distefano joins the show as Special Guest Co-Host and the Culture Corner is BACK! The guys talk going Back to the Gym, Brendan and Theo's Birthdays, Gen-Z trying to cancel Bill Burr, Chris's New Baby, Butt Hair, All New Relationship Advice Submissions, Update on Cat and Stevie Blue Eyes, All New Race My Cases with Judge Justin and much more! Get your King and the Sting merch at katsmerch.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Today's episode of King in the Sting with Chrissy Dumbbells is brought to you by the Kratom experts at Super Speciosa. That's right. You guys know if you follow me for any amount of time, I'm always loaded up, jacked up on Kratom. And you always ask me in my DMs or in the comments, what Kratom do you use? This is what I use. That's why they're sponsored now. Super Speciosa is the only Kratom I trust. It's the Wild West of Kratom out there, and you've got to be able to trust one. That's why Super Speciosa is unlike any other Kratom out there. They keep their Kratom the way nature intended, all right?

It's pure. You don't have to stress. You're getting the right stuff, exactly what you need. If you're going to try Kratom, it has to be from Super Speciosa, all right? I got you trusted, man. These other browns, they're full of shit. Not Super Speciosa. Plus, they're giving you guys 20% off.

So if you want to try it, get 20% off. Kratom's the shit. Go to GetSuperLeaf.com slash K-A-T-S. That's GetSuperLeaf, L-E-A-F, dot com slash K-A-T-S. Enter the promo code CATS for 20% off. That's GetSuperLeaf dot com slash K-A-T-S. Promo code K-A-T-S. Your private...

You want a picture of your friends in your arm? Ah! Ah! Ah! Whoa! Wow! Yeah, yeah. Come on, Bo!

Back off my broccolini. Get your life together. It is. Don't touch me, bro. I'm not touching you, dude. The greatest show on earth. A special episode. Chrissy D, the culture corner. I know.

This is very special. Look at this. Yeah. You know, Kat has an OnlyFans account now. Oh, beautiful. That's you got to make money. Yeah, really. Oh, she's making money.

I get it. Surprise. Real money. Money. Yeah, of course. Kat's the richest one in the room now. I believe it. I believe it.

She should have always been. Like, I have to go through her assistant. Yeah. I believe it. All right. Sign up. Sign up. Would you let your girl do a

only fans no oh she she fucking hates me dude i there's i would bet i'd be willing to bet a thousand dollars that she leaves with the kids before may 24th is it not going well out here we had her shooting a tv show for the viewers that don't know. You got here shooting a TV show for how long? I'm here for four months. Don't be a bitch. Just move out of here, dude. All my friends left or got canceled. I know.

I should just move out of here. But the problem is I love LA. I'm not going to be one of those guys. We're going to fucking hate LA. Because I don't. I like LA. It's the greatest place on earth. Our governor sucks, though.

But, dude, I got to be honest with you. If I'm going to be honest. Please do. I mean, listen. Because you're from new york the pandy wandy is i get it it's scary i get i'm not saying kovat's not real but i mean dude the hysteria about it in this town is a little it's a little absurd is it not where it's like dude fucking relax i mean they they they came and kovat tested me this morning for this fucking dumb true TV thing. And then they COVID tested my whole family. I'm like, well, she's five. She's not going anywhere. Stop.

Then I was jogging yesterday with no mask on and in the fucking park in Balboa Park. Just me. Somebody's like, can you put a mask on, sir? I was like, dude, you're gay. It's weird because we're on tour i was in cleveland i was tampa and you go on the news there and there's like there's like hope right there's like vaccinations we're opening up football's opening up basketball here you turn on the news like we're three masks like what the it's so stupid how's it so different here like you have to wear a butt plug. It's just, it kind of feels like,

like I want to just kind of walk up to people and be like, dude, Trump lost. He lost. You can take the mask off now. You can calm down. Because at first it was like, I'm wearing a mask to prove that I do not support Donald Trump.

And I'm just like, okay, fine. He's lost enough. You're so crazy. It's like, because when does it end then? So now we get the vaccine. Now there's a new strain for fucking Narnia, whatever. So say we get one. Dr. Fauci says we're past that. when does it end then so now we get the vaccine now there's a new strain for fucking narnia whatever so say we get one dr ouchie fouchie says we're past that when does it end then do you just wear the mask out for the rest of your life how fearful do you want to be i hear some people going i'm just gonna wear a mask for the rest of my i just changed my life

oh we can't do it yeah dude wait in new york do they have to wear them outside mask listen the kind of thing in new New York is most people wear it. Outside, though, we wear, especially if you're in a crowd, but, like, outside, if you're walking around with no mask on, it's just, like, fine. Inside, mask, gyms, mask. Like, even when I got here, it's like the gyms and restaurants have been open in New York for three months. You got to come to my gym, dog.

I know. Chrissy Dumbbells. Come to Zoo Culture. I know, dude. You're supposed to wear your wrist this morning. Yeah, because I had to get the front. Go get your son. You got to come to my gym, Doug. I got, yeah. Chris dumbbells come to zoo culture. I know. Do you miss this morning? Yeah. Because I had to get the front. Cause I got,

cause I got, cause I had to get the stupid, cause I had to get the stupid COVID test this morning, but I'm going to try to come tomorrow. Yeah. We're there tomorrow. Yeah. You guys have the sleds.

You push the sled. Oh yeah. I like to do the sled circuit sleddies. You come in shorts, get the cheeks out. I'll get those cheeks out. chrissy the squirts the oh i want to eat i want to eat that cake but i'm on my fitness plan i don't have the calories i know i don't either but i'll try it no but you look slim and hot i'm trying dog i'm down some i've been on a diet got a little toothache now that cake's for uh theovon and my birthday which is today happy birthday thanks

buddy and theo's is tomorrow yeah and theo gonna be here that's why we sent out that chrissy d could you imagine the kind of dickhead you have to be to not even show up for your own birthday party way to go theo way to go could you imagine dude they had a birthday party for you and you're in fucking nashville sticking chicken wings up your ass nothing nothing was better too was it two yeah two years ago you know he was like hey let's get each other gifts i'm like all right i give him you know i'm a sneaker i give him some jordan one pines these green and black jordan he gave me a theo von merch t-shirt that's our relationship he wrote he wrote you he got you a little card too he wrote that's our relationship in a nutshell dude theo vaughn first of all i you know how long have you known theo six years six years see i've known theo i've

well i probably know theo about six seven years but i knew theo when you know theo had nothing when i met him he had nothing yeah oh when you met him you had nothing good he was making money finger and finger and old ladies yeah i yeah i have a dm where uh the first time we made came on firing the kid at fox yeah like six seven years ago and he goes hey dude my my album just dropped my comedy album can you blast it out for me really help tweet this out and he's doing like you know making two thousand dollars a weekend now yeah one of the greatest comics fucking walking yeah now he won't show up to his own damn show theo i'll fucking eat your cake dude i want to eat i swear to god dude i'll eat i want to eat if you come chrissy I'll fucking eat your cake, dude. I want to eat that cake so bad. I swear to God, dude, I'll eat it. If you come, Chrissy is going to eat your ass.

How about that? A hundred percent, Theo. He's cheeked up now. He's getting his fatty back? Because he used to have a high, he used to have like a high wide ass for a while, but he lost it now? No, he still got his ass. He still has his ass.

He's doing a lot, like his trainer has him do a lot of squats, a lot of deadlift. That thing's getting plump, dude. Theo, yeah, man. Theo, I dude, I want to i wanna next time i see him i may shave his head i may just do that i may just shave the mullet off yeah he's gonna lose his power then could you imagine if i just held him down and we shaved his head you'd cry as a prank he'd look like gi jane it'd be a bad idea i know because right now i used to say he looks like eileen warnos i don't know if you know the serial yeah you know that yeah oh for monster yeah but the actual like woman who was killed like the real eileen warnos that his hair was kind of it looks a little bit like that now oh yeah yeah yeah yeah i said it on op and anthony

once but r.i.p to that show and me and theo used to do that show together and uh and yeah we pulled this picture up and it was crazy wait who's lady? She's the first female serial killer. To ever get executed. Charlize Theron did the movie Monster. Uh-huh. And Charlize Theron played her? Yeah. Why the fuck would they do that?

And she put on, like, 40 pounds. No, she put on 40 pounds. She was identical to her. She transformed into it. Oh, okay, because I was like, what? She does not look like Charlize Theron. Oh, okay, okay. Do you know Charlize Theron just got discovered in a store?

Some director was just walking by, and she was the checkout girl, and he was like, you're so beautiful. Really? That's how she got discovered. You know Guy Ritchie found Jason Statham the same way. He was hustling watches in London. Yeah. And he was like, holy shit, dude.

You look cool. You look cool. I'm starting to get to that. And then they fought. That should be a total thing. Yeah. You look cool. You look cool. I'm starting to get to that. And then they fuck. That should be a total thing. Yeah, acting is starting to be like, you know, the more and more I go through this career, I'm like, even with acting, it's like, I'll do it. But it's like, I love how actors just take, and actresses, just take themselves so seriously.

Where it's like, dude, you're making believe you're somebody else. That's shit my five-year-old daughter does. It's like, shut up. I don't care what you have to say about the whales. Yeah, calm down. Just shut up, dude. Just get the award. You're so fucking lucky.

Yeah, but also remember when the pandemic came out or when all the BLM movement was going on and they would create those videos? The black and white videos? It was like white people being like, I am privileged. Oh my God, dude. It's not okay. Yeah. I'm like, what the fuck?

You know what, dude? The guy from Breaking Bad. Listen, listen. Can we get a guy who represents the white culture? Yo, if I saw you guys in one of those videos, I'd punch you in the face. No, dude, because it's got to be. Listen, as a white guy, when I see white people apologizing for their privilege, I would imagine as a black guy, they hate that oh it's annoying because to me if i would you know if i saw if i saw a black guy

apologizing for whatever a black privilege i'd be like i don't trust you at all dude like like i wouldn't trust a white person apologizing for their privilege i'm like what are you actually hiding yeah dirtbag right there what are you hiding because i wasn't looking at you but now that you want to say how great you are now it's weird now i need to understand what you've done that's incredibly racist i mean bill burr great what happened of all time this is the best what do you what do you say i didn't see bill burr you didn't see this no you got they were trying to cancel him for this which is bullshit but it's good like canceling bill burr you can't he never acknowledges it is that the only one who wanted to kill himself during that piano solo?

This is the part that pissed everybody off. I am losing so much money right now. All right. Shout out to all the rock stars that I wanted to meet tonight who are watching at home instead. I'm talking to you, Don Dokken. All right. What? I'm old. That was my first concert all right here are the

next categories all right hey how many uh feminists are like going nuts so how why is this this white male doing all this latino that was the part that just pissed gen zers off they were they yeah they're all like you're canceled you canceled. But he never acknowledges it. He just keeps moving on and doing Bill Burr. Yeah, because what are you... You can't cancel... No one can...

You can't end someone for that. Dude, people need to go back to work. You might get kicked off Star Wars. Maybe. Maybe. This means a bunch of bitches. Yeah, who cares, though? Who cares, though?

No, that wouldn't affect Bill Burr. It won't affect him. He's one of the greatest fucking comics alive. This was the best in response to it. Someone said, Gen Z calling Bill Burr. It won't affect him. He's one of the greatest fucking comics alive. This was the best in response to it. Someone said, Gen Z calling Bill Burr racist, and they showed a picture with him and Nia, his African-American wife, his black wife.

Oh, my God. Look at this fucking pussy. Wait, what pussy? Well, I'm not suggesting Bill Burr is racist. A white man having a non-white wife can sometimes be a sign of racism. Non-white. So you shouldn't assume someone's racist just because they own a minority sex servant. They may very well have one because they're racist.

Oh, no. That guy should get punched in the face. And Bill Burr's wife responded with this. Bitch. I love how people just lighten these people up. Oh, gosh. Because it's over. It's over.

Now it's over. Everyone's sick of your shit. You got to move on. Yeah, because now it's getting to the point where we're like, we have to go back to work. The boredom is over. A lot of people realize that, I mean, that account is real, but most of these accounts are not real. They're Russian bots.

It's like, we're starting to understand, we're starting to win the war. Because I believe we're in World War III right now on Twitter with russia because we're never going to invade russia and they're not going to invade us but i think we are how we work anymore with the bots yeah because it's like so many people it's like they'll just create an account and then it'll be the exact opposite of what you think we'll just some somebody in russia will make an account and you'll just fight with that account but now i start to feel like with all these documentaries coming out and just seeing it you're like oh it's not real so now when somebody tweets if you just look at any type of controversial tweet some and that has like thousands of comments you'll see some of the

same exact comments i mean the same words in the same place yeah with seven different accounts with seven different avatars and yeah see that's what i'm saying a lot of times we're fighting with people they're not real and they never were real it's but usually even the ones that come even if they are real you realize they have like 17 followers and they're like oh they're in their basement yeah you know yeah dude no no that's not for me those deep throat this right now if i can just take it to the head i like a little circumcised bottle of water whoa okay what is up king the thing listeners listen man is there something interfering with your happiness or is preventing you from achieving your real goals what is it man quit talking to your friends your knucklehead friends and get with a real licensed professional therapist with

better help you can start communicating under 48 hours not a crisis line it's not self-help it's professional counseling done securely online all All right. The service is available worldwide. Mr. Worldwide. You get timely and thoughtful responses. Plus you can schedule weekly video or phone sessions. All right. We got you covered, man. It's more affordable than traditional offline counseling and financial aid is also available. BetterHelp wants you to start living a happier life today. Visit betterhelp.com slash cats. That's betterhelp.com slash cats and join the over 1 million people who have taken charge of their mental health with the help of an experienced professional. In fact, so many people have been using BetterHelp. They are recruiting additional counselors in all 50

states. This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp and King's King listeners get 10% off their first month at betterhelp.com slash K-A-T-S. Hello, fresh. Hello, fresh. Thank God they cut out the stress of meal planning and grocery store trips so you can enjoy cooking and get dinner on the table in about 30 minutes or less. It's one less thing you have to worry about. You got kids, you got work, you're busy. Let HelloFresh help you out, man. With 25 plus recipes to choose from each freaking week, they're going to get you covered, man. Over four out of five HelloFresh customers say HelloFresh helps them lead a healthier lifestyle

with delicious low-calorie, carb-smart, and vegetarian options available each freaking week, man. All right, we got you covered. They sent me my meals. I love them. It's easy. Again, it's one less thing you have to worry about. So go to HelloFresh.com slash 12King and use the code 12King for 12 free meals, including free shipping.

It's America's number one meal kit hello fresh who's this is this a transgender because i got the biggest transgender fan base yeah this is our uh first king at her sting speaking of people in their basement what's up theo and sharp i have a king it or sting it would you get a painting of a serial killer in your house this is some shit you don't yeah i struggle with this portrait of ted bundy and i'm thinking of the night stalker next oh i hear you dude i thought about that gang gang buzz buzz night stalker listen if you want to talk about most beautiful serial killers richard richard. Richard Ramirez is numero uno. Dude, I want to have those teeth.

Those pouty, he got them fixed, dog. He got veneers when he was in prison. If he didn't smile, he was hot. Yeah. No, even when he got veneers and he smiled, he's talking about a rock star, long black hair. Dude. Bodied up, shred city, full set of lips.

Like a young Johnny Depp. Ooh, dad. Yes, thank you. Johnny Depp should play him. With the shades on and stuff? I'm reading his book now, dude. I know. Dark shit.

I'm laying in my – here in L.A., you know, in Encino for a couple of months, and I'm laying in bed last night, like, thinking, like, it sucks he's dead. I would love to come in and get raped by him. Oh, shit. He's a good-looking guy. You had a high chance of getting raped by that man. I know, dude. He would come – dude, he was such a psychopath, though, because he would like kill men, women, then like molest

children, let them go. You would anally rape men and women. Yeah. He didn't care. Fuck dudes. Yes. Yes. I don't care.

Because he said he was just possessed by Satan. He was just fully. He thought Satan was telling him what to do. And by him being like making the worst crime scene, he was pleasing Satan. Yeah. And what's weird, you read about the book, it's such a shame. He grew up in a hardworking Mexican family. He's one of five.

His dad was hard on him, right? His dad was hard and beat the family. But he came from, obviously, his dad's a piece of shit. But he had a loving mom, super loving sister. He was the little one of the family. They loved him. He got good grades and then he would get uh seizures and just like pass out and they thought it was uh when he's

like in fourth grade he's on a swing set and was knocked unconscious for like an hour and so they think it fucked up something in his brain yeah and then his uh his uncle went to vietnam and was super fucked him came back and and took him under his wing. But he came from a good family. His family is solid as fuck. But then that uncle would like – basically he was like – that was his protege. And the uncle came back from Vietnam super fucked up. And he apparently killed like 30 people over there.

But he had a bunch of pictures of him like with a girl in Vietnam, a prisoner. And he'd like show a picture, gunned her head, like her sucking his dick. And the next picture would be her with her head cut off. Uh-oh, Ken, I got some ideas for your OnlyFans. Why don't you do a little Richard Ramirez photo shoot? That's not a bad idea.

That's not a bad pitch. I gotta do the reverse, though, then. Get a white guy. Yeah, I have to get a white guy for that. Although he's Mexican, but yeah. Because I would just pretend that, like, I was thecong that'd be the reverse yeah almost like a response you can hold a contest to be the white guy because i'm sure a bunch of your simps would enjoy doing that i don't think stevie would let me have any other white guy doing that god that would do it so viral huh that'd go so. I would buy a house the next day if I did that.

I would buy a house the very next day. You could just probably buy a house by next week with the way this OnlyFans is going. Yeah. Probably. Good for you. So, King or Sting it, serial killer portraits in your home. I have kids, so it's frowned upon. But if I was by myself, there'd probably be some Charlie Manson stuff on the wall and

I can light it up. Yeah. That culture, the whole thing. I don't say big fan because he killed people technically, so you'd king it oh you'd sing it sting it would i have charles manson's hair framed maybe yeah i probably i'm so into serial killers it's alarming it's alarming see i see i like serial killers, but I can't watch like Investigation Discovery. Investigate. I can't watch it unless people are home.

Like I genuinely, even if my five-year-old daughter is home, then I can watch it. Like somebody has to be in the house. If I'm by myself. I can't do it, dude. But how crazy is that? You, of course, can. And I'm like a relatively big guy too, not like you. But you would literally rip off Ted Bundy's head

and shit down his neck but you're scared of him. I'm terrified. So am I. I'm legit terrified if like Richard, I would beat the shit out of Richard Ramirez.

Maybe. He's wiry. Wiry. Ted Bundy would annihilate. Ted Bundy, I'd fucking annihilate. Jeffrey Dahmer. What would Ted Bundy do?

He would kill women. Dude, you want to hear a wild. Dahmer would eat your ass and cut your face off. okay. Dude, you want to hear a wild... Dahmer would eat your ass and cut your face off. Yeah, okay. Dude, you want to hear a wild Ted Bundy story?

You know comedian Ryan Hamilton? Yeah. Great guy, Ryan Hamilton. What's he look like? He's got a Netflix special, Ryan Hamilton. He told us this story and I don't know

if I have the characters right, but dude, we were sitting on the edge of our seats in New York. I was like, ah! I think it's his sister. His sister. Somebody extremely close to me. Either sister or it's like aunt.

Anyway, went on a date with a guy. Oh, well, he has the biggest smile in the world. Yeah, biggest smile. Went on a date with a guy in Utah in, like, the 70s because they're Mormons in Utah or something like that in the 70s. Ted Bundy went through Utah. Goes on a date, right, with this guy. And she's on the date and she calls her bro like in the middle of the date they're in a public restaurant she calls

her i think ryan or ryan's older brother and it's like hey can you come pick me up this guy's just weird vibes so so they're like yeah fine we'll come pick you up no problem he had picked her up from the house so he knew the guy knew where she lived so he the the brother comes and picks up uh the sister his sister go and she's like i just was freaked out by that day blah blah the brother leaves at like six o'clock in the morning because he had like a paper route and he was like rustling in the bushes and sees the guy's car from the night before and she says and so he was hiding there all night like waiting for her to come out fast forward

dedication yeah dude this is like before anything it was fucking Ted Bundy she was on the date with Ted Bundy she said his name was Ted he's a handsome devil and he had

she hadn't seen and nobody had seen him he wasn't famous yet he had killed people already but he wasn't on the news it wasn't until like two years later when his face was everywhere she was like that was the guy damn dude he almost got fucking bundied damn yeah man almost got bundied

that was ryan hamilton's story i think it was ryan or right no i he never told it on stage he told it to his friends no he told yeah it was talking inside a comedy club dude and then i just had on my podcast uh the chrissy podcast. I just had my girlfriend's uncle who's transgendered who just got out of prison. His name's T.T. Jerry. Oh, I saw those clips. Those are so good. T.T. Jerry, yeah. Jenny from the cell block. Bring that up, Nick. Jenny from the cell block.

Jenny from the block, Doug. So T.T. Jerry, here we go. Fresh out of prison with T.T. So T.T., first of all, T.T. Jerry, he came into my apartment. I do my shots in the apartment. jerry he came into my apartment i do my shots on the apartment yeah he came he came into my apartment wearing one of my sweatshirts that i gave him like two months ago from the denver comedy works and then left wearing my girlfriend's sweatshirt so he just goes guy or girl like in the same day he just transforms whatever he wants to do but he was

a woman for for the interview with me he was tt and he told us he was in prison for 25 years like on and off like he did like 15 year sentence and came out then did five what did he go away for drugs yeah drugs and larceny steal all that stuff yeah yeah such a dick all that yeah whatever it was but he's just tt zjs so he would tell us he told us that he was in prison one he was in first time he was in prison he was in prison with tupac so he was like you know and and we were googling like what prison was it what tell us and he wasn't lying and it was not lying so who else so tupac and he said tupac was actually like fun in in prison but he was he said he he got out of prison like a month or so before he died but he was like he was like wanted to like give up like

he was still rapping but he wanted to give up like life of crime and then he got killed so he was like so that was sad but he but he was in prison with the son of sam and a guy who just died uh a couple of weeks ago ronald de feo jr who did the amityville horror house like the act like the actual dad he now he was like actual cellmates with it or shared a wall was he crazy or no he said he said son of sam not crazy son of sam has like or didn't appear crazy where he was like he was nuts back in the day you've seen son of sam bring him up nick dude he said yeah uh he said his um dog was telling him to do all these crazy things um but he kind of he's all about david berkowitz guy he's all about religion now though he's like one full

catholic yeah they always do they always do yeah because they're trying to save their asses to get to heaven. So he's a Jewish kid, but he just went full Catholic. But he said Ronald DeFeo Jr., the Amityville Horror House guy, he would sit in his cell every day, like did not miss a day, just being like, I didn't kill my grandma. The last one I had to kill was my grandma. I had to kill my grandma. He would always talk about killing his grandma.

And T.T. Jerry said, you know, he was a pretty horny guy ronald de feo jr so because tt was trans and he had like ass implants and had actually was on estrogen therapy and i can see it dude he would take his mirror and let and let uh de feo jr jerk off to his ass pics which is nice yeah yeah or not but he wouldn't suck him off he claims he didn't but we kind of all feel he did yeah yeah i hate to go there but you're locked in a cell it was a wild episode dick dude it was a fan to to talk to someone who's been in prison for 25 years and how they see the world and someone who's transgendered who's been transgendered since like they were he was like i knew i was in the wrong body when i was like eight he's like so he was like i was trans he had these interesting points he was like i was trans before it was cool he was like all of

a sudden now everybody's trans he's like which maybe that's true he's like i was trans before it was cool he was like all of a sudden now everybody's trans he's like which maybe that's true he's like or maybe it's just people these kids are like they want to go like goth yeah and now but they're but they'll cut their dick off he's like you know if you cut it off like it's not coming back he's like so i just hope that the kids that do this like really want to do this yeah he's like i will i've all i've ever wanted in my life was a pussy and we were like dude we going to get it for you. And his estrogen therapy stopped when he got out of prison. So all the proceeds of his Patreon episode, patreon.com, such Christy comedy, the merch that we made for him, all that stuff is going to his estrogen therapy.

So he can continue it. But he still has the ass and tits? He's got little titties and his ass. He's just, you know, listen, Puerto Ricans, everybody in my girl's family's got a fat ass everybody yeah yeah everybody's got a nice ass so but yeah dude it's zero killers man so i'm gonna king it and i'm gonna have a picture of uh son of sam in my house so tt jerry can jerk off to it oh yeah i'm a family guy yeah you're family yeah is this quagmire? What's this guy want? Oh, shit. Yeah.

What's up, guys? This is Brandon from Minneapolis. Brandon? I have a King It or Sting It for you guys this week. So I don't know if you have any, like, super dope, like, birthday themes or anything when you're growing up as a kid, but I saw this video on the internet the other day, and I want to know if we King It or sting it this kid's birthday party and entrance gang gang party party baby yeah what's a wwe entrance oh my god

oh that's so cool he's dead serious like stone cold yeah what's the greatest party of all time. This is awesome. Just take two beers and look at that. Yeah. Oh, it takes two waters. Jellies do two sodas, Bob. Yeah. Yeah.

Wow. He's dead serious. There it is. He has the knee braces on. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. There it is. He has the knee braces on. How about four? Dude, I remember when I was like eight, my mom tried going all out, and she got me this custom cake because my favorite players were Steve Atwater for the Denver Broncos, my home team, and Junior Seau. And my mom got a special custom cake where Steve Atwater was tackling Junior Seau.

And she thought I'd be like, oh, this is crazy because of my two favorite players. But they were both on defense, and I was so upset. Do you ever think you could put a shotgun to your chest? What do you mean? That's what Junior Seau did when he killed himself. He put a shotgun to his chest. Because he wanted to preserve his brain. How wild is that?

You must have to fucking really have a headache he's my favorite person of all time yeah my favorite all time you want to talk about a good looking guy oh the best dude he was young with that mustache if junior say i had only fans i'd be on it oh me too Yeah. Hell yeah. He's playing with his butthole. Shout out to Junior Seau. Shout out to Junior Seau. How long ago was that? A few years ago. Have you ever watched The Doc?

No, I haven't. It's sad. It's, of course, extremely sad, but it's like, yeah, dude, he shot himself in the chest to preserve his brain. To preserve his brain because he's so fucked up. He tried to kill himself driving off PCH know, it doesn't work like that. He just, like, went down the hill. Yeah.

What the fuck? He's like, oh, I fell asleep. They're like, dude, you're a junior sale. Like, your body's been through more shit than a car accident. Yeah, yeah, this isn't going to do it, man. Yeah. But what's weird is he shot himself with a shotgun. And then if you look at the Kurt Cobain one.

Okay. I'm not a conspiracy guy, but you ever looked into that? God, it's shady. Did he say Courtney Love killed him, maybe? For sure. For sure. That's what they say. Even his daughter thinks she killed him right and that's her daughter yeah yeah i i don't because you look at the shotgun he did it with they're like it's there's no there's literally no way and then where the shell rolled rolled they're like there's no way there's no way

yeah i don't know the amount of uh heroin that was in his body they said he would have passed out by injecting that much heroin he would have passed out by injecting that much heroin. He would have passed out before pulling the trigger. Dude, what if you get CTE? Are you going to shoot yourself in the chest? I think I do now, and it made me funnier. It made you funnier, but what are you going to do if you get to a junior sale level?

Will you preserve your brain, or how do you want us to kill you? Oh, man. We'll do it. What do you want us to do? Probably have T.T. do it. You want T.T. to do it? T.T. do it. He'll just milk you until you fucking...

Yeah, milk me dry, daddy. Just get it fluid. I hope, yeah, that would suck if you fucking did that. But what are you going to do? If you did it, I'd just pop right in. Thanks, man. King of the sting. You just replace me.

You do fighting the kids. King of the sting. We go over your suicide. And below the belt. Yeah, we do it. I'd be like, I'd sting that suicide because... We just give reasons why he did it. He's like, I king it.

I can't stand the guy. No, I love you, dude. Look at this fat fuck. No, I'm kidding. He's handsome. He's a good person. What's up, Brendan? This is Luke, and I'm coming at you from Detroit, Michigan.

I'm in the workshop today, and I got a king or sting it for you guys. So I have been working on a little prototype to get rid of the old wet wiper. Those fancy bidets everybody wants. It's just an advertising thing. Those things don't really clean you out the way they're supposed to. If you do it right. I've got a little invention I've been working on.

I'm calling it the Shit Buster 4000. Great name. Whoa! Wow! It won't be that big. It's just a prototype it's not gonna dude the size dude it's the size of an f-150 who the fuck's gonna do he mentions who might use this one and I'll power it up for you and show you how it works it's probably pretty obvious but you know you'll just get that thing in there and it's cleaned out real good you're like your boy t that one's a little big it's a custom size that we had made for tim dylan he's actually into our company so uh what do you guys think i love this

i like it dude shit buster 4000 4000. I'm king of this kid. I'm king of this kid. I'm king of it. The Shitbuster 4000 is a hit. Now, I'd like to invest. I'm going to king on the Shitbuster 4000 for sure. This kid is great. Could you get it a tad smaller, though, for me?

I know it's a prototype, but. Now, let me ask you, though. Is that a used Shitbuster? No, I think that's like those chinchilla fur. Because it looks like Looks like his boys were kind of trying. Yeah, looks like yeah like shit on like a paper straw Everyone need like an individual shit. Buster. Yeah, I guess you He's hating on bidets, but have you used a new one like the electronic ones we press the buttons

That's living, daddy. Mine puts a cold water. Buy us one. You want a bidet? A nice one, yeah. I have one. Does it do warm water or cold water? It's not like cold, but I mean, it's going to be cold because it's just like, oh, shit. You have one at your crib?

Yeah. And then does it also blow, too? There's one that blows dry your ass, too. No, no, no. It doesn't have the big boy. Oh, you don't have the big boy. You don't one that blows dry your ass, too. No, no, no. It doesn't have the big one. Oh, you don't have the big boy. You don't have that Tushy 4000. There's a Tushy 4000?

They got a big one. They have one that's like all different temperatures of water. And yeah, blow dry your ass hair. Music. Yes. You don't have a Tushy? No. No.

They don't sponsor that? I feel like they sponsor everybody's podcast. Not mine, man. Not mine. You guys got something better. Tell you what. It's your boy's birthday. It's Theo's birthday.

Spicy bros or Pisces bros or you call spicy bros, whatever you want, man. If you're going to get us something, make sure it is a diamond from Blue Nile. Surprise, Theo. You're getting a diamond studded earring. All right. Uh, whatever you want, man, they have high quality jewelry. Are you looking for a gift that sparkles this holiday? Maybe St. Patty's day. Instead of getting your girl green bear, you get her a blue Nile diamond, go to blue Nile.com. All right. It's time to mark a special occasion. That's covered blue. Now you can create a building engagement ring of her dreams.

Never settle at bluenile.com. Choose from more than 100,000 ethically sourced, GIA graded diamonds in every shape and size with endless selections of settings to help you design the ring, Aaron's pendant of her dreams. We got you guys covered, all right? You can also pick from a vast selection

of preset diamond and gemstone jewelry. Blue Nile offers endless options ready to ship the same day. Also, if you get your girl or your mans I don't like mans anymore if you get them something that they don't like, no problem, man.

100% satisfaction guaranteed. Shop stress-free with guaranteed free shipping and returns. Make your moment sparkle with jewelry from bluenow.com. And King of the Sting listeners get $50 off $500. This is a podcast exclusive. Offer includes engagement. Use code K-A-T-S. That's code K-A-T-S.

Plus, every order is insured, ships free and arrives in the street low package. So it doesn't give away the surprise shop stress-free and find your forever peace. Go to blue now.com today. All right, go to blue now.com today. Promo code K A T S. Today's episode of King in the sting with Chrissy dumbbells is brought to you by the Kratom experts at Super Speciosa. That's right.

You guys know if you follow me for any amount of time, I'm always loaded up, jacked up on Kratom. And you always ask me in my DMs or in the comments, what Kratom do you use? This is what I use. That's why they're sponsored now. Super Speciosa is the only Kratom I trust. It's the Wild West Kratom out there, and you've got to be able to trust one. That's why Super Speciosa is unlike any other Kratom out there. They keep their Kratom the way nature intended, all right?

It's pure. You don't have to stress. You're getting the right stuff, exactly what you need. If you're going to try Kratom, it has to be from Super Speciosa, all right? I got you trusted, man. These other browns, they're full of shit be from super speciosa all right i got you trusted man these other browns the full shit not super speciosa plus they're giving you guys 20 off so if you want to try it get 20 off kratom's the shit go to get super leaf.com slash k-a-t-s that's get super leaf l-e-a-f.com slash k-a-t-s enter the promo promo code CATS for 20% off. That's GetSuperLeaf.com

slash K-A-T-S. Promo code K-A-T-S. What else you got, Nick? Ooh! Hi! Holla! Alright, so can you understand it? Would you rather lose all

your money or all your motherfucking memories, bro? Like, King or Sting it. And then she's got a quick follow-up. Okay, so that was actually not King or Sting it. It was the Bay Club and I'm high. She's hot as fuck. Let that body do, baby.

So King and the Sting. What was it? King or Sting it. King or Sting it. Losing all your money or losing your memories? Losing your money or your memories? Yeah. My money.

Because if you lose all your memories, I don't know where the fuck it is. Who cares, dude? Yeah, who gives a fuck? I could be Dana White with $400 million. I don't know what the fuck's going on. Yeah, that's a good point. Shitting my pants and stuff. Don't know where I'm at.

Yeah, I've had terrifying memories. I'll lose every single memory. Yeah. I feel like that one is, I wouldn't expect her to, I thought she was going to have a better one, but she's bodied. Those are, no, but those are real, her real breasts. Yes. And that's her real face.

Real breasts, real face. Absolutely. She's from, where is she? Hawaiian? She looks a little Japanese What are the chances Let me ask you this What are the chances

If she continued this video And then got up There would be a nice set of cock and balls What are the chances of that? That would top it the fuck off Yeah yeah And then we got TT'd Yeah

If she still was like King or sting it Big dick If she started king or sting it Yeah making a lasso dick I would king king king king Slap her on her wrist like a watch king or sting it yeah if she started king or stinging it yeah making a lasso dick i would king slap around a wrist like a watch king or sting it we didn't king or we didn't king or sting the kids uh birthday party we didn't oh did we oh i just i just shared a sad story on my birthday party oh yeah i king that kid's birthday party okay because my birthday is not gonna i'm

on my birthday my party i'll be getting off a Southwest flight in Spokane. That'll be fun, though. Yeah, that'd be great. I don't know what I would do. Maybe I'd sting it. I think I'm going to sting this kid's party because there were no master social distancing. Do you go nuts for your kid's B-Day party? For my kid's birthday?

Yeah, for my kid's birthday last year, we had – I didn't tell her mom. At that point, we weren't together. You guys are together now, right? We're together now. She's pregnant. July 4th, my child's due. Oh, July 4th. Yeah.

Bam, bam, bam. Boy or girl, do you know? We don't know yet. It's a boy. Yeah, it feels like it's a boy, and we're going to name it Donald. Okay. Imagine we did. He'd be the only one.

Could you imagine? What do you think is actually a bigger problem? Like, if I name my kid Donald or Adolf, what do you think would be a bigger issue? Donald. You think Donald would be a bigger issue? Donald, because Adolf, people, it's so old school. Some would get it. Yeah.

The Jews in New York would be really upset. But general, the world would be like, Adolf, that's different. Yeah yeah it's okay yeah donald yeah i um yes sure donald's a problem july 4th dude that's when the babies do so she got pregnant and then you were like yeah we should probably try to make this work well no week we were back to get got back together in quarantine and then we had kept saying like we're gonna take things slow this time because the last time when you know i on the second or third date she got pregnant with our daughter and then we're gonna take things slow this time because the last time when you know i on the second or third date she got pregnant with our daughter and then we're like oh like we got back together during quarantine like let's try to make this work we'll take it very very slow you know

and then literally probably the fourth time we had sex just pregnant again just immediately again damn chrissy dumbbell swimmers that's what it is dude and then she's puerto rican yeah it's just like combo it's just it's just whatever it is with us where it's just like it's just constant like it's just constant humans we just constantly make people that's what it is and then i got friends of mine who both you know both fertile myrtles but they just can't they just can't do they just it's like a science where it's like if you're fertile and she's fertile that doesn't mean you guys are gonna have kids it has to like your sperm has to like her egg yeah my sperm see those puerto rican huevos and we're like yeah i was like king it king it king it king yeah uh should we move on some relationship advice yeah i like this yes full set of lips

look at that. Nice chain. What's up, Brendan Vaughn? What's up, Theo Schaub? How's it hanging, Nick and Chin? And how's it going to whatever guests you guys got in the studio this week because you guys fired Cat and Chappelle? I'm calling in from Honolulu, Hawaii, and I need some relationship advice from you guys. My girlfriend's been wanting to wax my asshole,

and I just don't know how to feel about it. don't look here man it'll probably make her a little happier you know every man points really the other hand every man really not looking down there you know I don't know check how it looks every day I don't care how hairy it gets that thing can grow wild for all I care but what do you guys think let me girlfriend wax your ass dang Dang it, doggy. I said do it. Here's the thing, though. My girl wanted to do it to me, too, and I was like, sure, why not? And then I said, but let's try it just on my inner thigh, see how bad it hurts.

Dude. Hurts, right? Girls go through it all the time. Dude, not for me. Do not do it. I went, you are not touching my asshole. Yeah, to shave their asshole, I mean, I guess i would let her do it i mean it's bonding you know what i mean you bond shaving is different from waxing your asshole though he said waxing

your so waxing is like piping hot wax on your ass it doesn't even have to be piping hot they have cool waxes now the only problem is when you pull it you're pulling even the hair follicles it but here's the thing with me is i have a skin tag on my asshole, and I've been trying to get it off. So I feel like I would- That might work. I would use the guise of, hey, can you wax my asshole? This would be a fun bonding thing.

But really, I want to get the wart off my ass. Oh, that might do it then. Yes. You might have to keep it. So I'll say yes. You got a wart there? No, I think it's a skin tag. The doctor says it's a skin tag.

It fucking hurts though man But it's also not that bonding Cause you either gotta If your girl's gonna do it You gotta decide Baby style Where you're holding your ankles And she's like On all fours

And she's grabbing the balls And like going like this Where it's super Weird Uncomfortable Or Yeah yeah on all fours Like a

And spread them And spread them How would you do it I'd probably go baby style put that nuts in her face i would i think i would go i would go all fours because i think if i went baby style one thousand percent i'd fart and then if i fart because every time i do that like even if i haven't eaten in three days like if i do as soon as i go into that position, I just fart. Just immediately. Almost like a crunch.

Dude, and it's like, yeah, I'll queef. Like it'll just, yeah. Especially if you're just holding it there for that long. The air comes out of my ass. So I would go on all fours. But I think this kid should 1,000% let his girl do it. I think he should and report back. But also, Asian, you're not that hairy, dude.

Only do it if you want your girl report back but also asian like you're not that hairy dude you want your girl to eat your ass that's it the pain is so it's so painful especially for a man because you have more hair there there's more to rip off right it's gonna hurt like a motherfucker if you don't want to do it already i don't recommend it you like to eat your ass i've never got my ass eaten i've never had any sex i don't do there's something about this no i've never looked an ass i just no come on it's the guy nobody's watching i swear to god he's just embarrassed about the skin tag he didn't want people to see it that's a good point because i think i've had the skin chris eats ass i swear to god i don't eat s i i not that i'm against it i just because i get a lot of sore throats not since the pandy way we wear masks and wash our hands but i would always get sore throats like

if i made out with like a couple of girls or if i like ever like went down on a girl i would get a sore throat immediately so i was thinking the ass i mean i would get full cancer you get pink eye yeah that's kind of a rumor too that you get pink eye yeah what you're saying you don't no no right but you do the only way to get pink eyes fecal yeah what you're saying you don't no no right but you do the only way to get pink eyes fecal particles in the eye right i don't think so didn't kirk douglas get uh throat cancer but that's from hpv because you eat out girls with hpv or suck penis with hpv i don't know what kirk russell's into um no not kirk russell douglas kirk douglas yeah kirk let's just say it starts a rumor that Kurt Russell did it too.

Yeah. But I think, yeah, I've never done it, dude. I've never even tried anal sex. That's so disappointing. Would you let your girl wax your asshole? Oh, yeah. Go for it. Oh, well. Nice.

Good for you. Who cares? Do you think you have a hairy asshole? I probably do. He has a beard, though. He doesn't have that much beard hair. I barely have a fucking beard. This is my new bro.

I can't grow anything either, dude. It's all patchy. Dude, I fucking suck at it. I don't know why. I'll tell you he's been doing work overtime if they wax their asshole. Oh, my God, dude. You got a duck tail down there. It's like the elastic jungle from Guts.

It's just bungee cords all over. I think Kat hit it on the head, though. Like, this is just a gateway request. She's doing it to get it clean. And then the next is, can I eat it? She wants to eat your ass. She wants to eat your ass. Get in there, girl.

I couldn't even imagine going to a guy's ass. Nothing wrong with that. Get in there, girl. Go get in there, girl. What does it feel like when a girl eats your ass? It feels good? Look at Brenda. Look at Brenda.

You know. You better answer that. You know. It feels good, huh? Try it out with your girl, yeah put your kid no you can't put your kid to bed early take a shower get on all fours and just let her eat the ass it's interesting i've never even thought about it dude it's a nightmare there's not enough wet wipes to clean my ass yeah i know maybe know. Maybe you need that bidet.

I do. That's what I do. Would you be down for it, Kat? If Stevie was like, I really like my ass eating out. If Stevie asked, I'd be open to it. I've had other guys I've dated in the past ask for it. And I always said no. Because I just, I don't trust them or their hygiene.

Right. I don't trust them. Stevie has OCD, though. So you know he's clean. I know he's clean. Stevie has OCD, though, so you know he's clean. I know he's clean, but there's something about, like, maybe it's just me. I always felt like white people never really clean their ass properly because they can wash it. That's racist. I agree with that. I don't.

That's racist. Yeah, I agree. That is racist. Stevie is the cleanest man I've ever met. He has OCD. Yes, absolutely. But he might be thick hairy down there because he has that thick Boston beard. He doesn't want me anywhere near his butt. That's that prison. Yeah. He hides his Yes, absolutely. He might be thick hairy down there because he has that thick Boston beard. He doesn't want me anywhere near

his butt. That's that prison. He hides his butt though. How long did he do? Seven years. Seven or eight years. Eight years in federal prison? That's significant. That's a life-changing amount of time. Think about how long seven, eight years ago. In Boston. What did he do? What was the crime? I think

drug trafficking or money laundering. Conspiracy for selling drugs. And they gave eight years like that? Yeah, because money laundering. He got conspiracy for selling drugs. And they gave eight years like that? Yeah, because he was young. He was like 20, 21. And they gave him eight years? Yeah, he took a deal. Wow, so he could have got way more.

Yeah. He could have gotten more. Have you never met Stevie Blue? No. Was he a comedian? Yeah. No, I never met him. Huge cock.

Really? He also used to do porn. He used to do porn. Where can I see his work? Probably somewhere online. I'll have him send me a. Really? He also used to do porn. He used to do porn. Where can I see his work? Probably somewhere online. I'll have him send me a pic. Pornhub? Probably online.

What's his name? Stevie Blue. Do you know Nicole Aniston? I know Jennifer Aniston. Nope. Nope. Who's Nicole Aniston? Porn's the biggest porn star in the world.

No. Dude, Chrissy Dumbbells. You don't get your ass eaten or watch Nicole Aniston? No, I jerk off to women's tennis. Same. Chrissy Dumbbells. You don't get your ass eaten or watch Nicole Aniston? No, I jerk off to women's tennis. Okay, so Nicole Aniston. Sure. That was his girl before Kat. Okay.

Upgrade. Oh, thanks. I think Nicole's beautiful, though. Super dying. Stunning. I've seen her in person. And do they still... Now, if Nicole aniston and stevie

bloys were to do a porn scene together you're okay with that uh not anymore no uh initially when he and i first started dating i was i didn't really want to spend extra time with him because of that i was like oh like we'll hang out hook up whatever but i don't want anything more to do with you then he quit porn because he knew i wouldn't want anything to do with him because of that he quit porn because that and then also i can't have you on the road with me i can't have porn star yeah i love you but i can't i can't be associated with that yeah i get it we got a business to run here it's interesting though because porn starts because he's just going to work like that's what it would be he just goes to work and yeah he puts his boots on and everything yeah it's not his fault he He just puts his boots on and everything.

Yeah, it's not his fault he's gifted with that thick white stick. I'd like to see his cock. Can we pull his cock up? Can we pull up his seat? He also has a fat ass that he hides from the world. We can't pull up his cock. Hey, she knows where to get it. Yeah. He's a big guy.

Can we just give Stevie Blue Eyes a penis? She wants to see it. Let me ask him. I'd like to see it. Oh, yeah. Ask him. You can tell him to DM me. Say, hey, Stevie, you sent us a pic.

Tell him to DM me. I'm just on the toilet you sent us a pic. Tell him to DM me. I'm just on the toilet fingering my asshole, jerking off to Stevie Boyce. I wouldn't piss next to him. I wouldn't piss next to him. You've seen his hammer, too? Yeah. He pulls it out. It's like this cake.

Iguana tail, dog. Really? Just fucking. That's hot. As we're waiting for it, you want to do another relationship? Yeah, please. This guy was definitely his ass. I'm sucking in the stings of Julian.

Apparently late at night with the Yosemite Sam mustache I got a relationship advice question it does not have to do with that cat it's more like a single as a pringle question you know we've got a coffee business and we're growing it really quickly currently we're working with some comedians and musicians

I just hit up Chappelle for instance to do something but you did? I'm curious if you think that waiting to date until you've reached a certain point of success not just like stability but like success is a bad thing yes uh if i should be dating while succeeding or if i should wait until i think that i've quote unquote made it um is that bad to wait

you know should i stay in the game or should I not? Should I not stay in the game? Or should I just make that bread and eat it? Like my role model, Brendan Schaub, eating the bread and making the bread. Yes. Anyways, gang, gang, buzz, buzz. Let me know. Buzz, buzz, young man.

Good luck with your coffee. Yeah. Dude, you don't want a gold digger. You don't get all rich and you don't know What their motives are My girl used to sleep on the floor with me In a 600 square foot apartment That I was leasing

See I think people like this though Like this guy I think when you start To think about it all like that Like when I was getting from him was like You know you have to just like go Like just be in the moment like just live like you're like should i wait for this should i wait to have kids should i wait it's like no dude life will just happen to you just go just make the coffee make the bread eat the bread get a

girlfriend like it all be fine like there's never the right time was bread the reference to money i guess he's talking i don't know a kid like this i don't know yeah just go i'm with you just go like if you meet a great girl, yeah, dude, why not? People are like, oh, I'm waiting to have success to have kids. It's like, no, life doesn't care. Life doesn't care. Just shut up and make it work. I'm having a second child.

Do you feel stressed about it? It's different with two of them, man. No, you know what? I feel less stressed because I feel like, you know. You went through it. Yeah, and I feel like, you you know i'm excited about it like i literally people something on my family will like look at my life sometimes be like i don't know how you deal with what you deal with i don't know like what a nightmare and i'm like no dude i just love being a dad yeah me too so like just getting to be with my kid every

day i love and then having a second child i'm like you double that down i'm like what's the what's the problem yeah i tell my girl like all the love these kids give, why not keep going, man? Yeah, dude, I'd have a third kid. Let's get a squad. Yeah, I want like four. You want four kids? Yeah, I want four. Would you adopt?

Probably not. You would just- No, I would consider it. Right. Yeah. Now, what are you? What is Sean? Because Sean, what's your nationality?

Sean's German. And what's the other part? It has to be border. You're over the wall. you're half over the wall you have to be half over the wall are you not half over the wall i'm not even close what are you mongolian or something no my mama born and raised in england so i'm 50 english which is why i ride for england and my dad's german italian so you're not mongolian or over the wall nothing what yeah why do you look like that i don't know. It's so bizarre, dude.

And your brother looks like you, too. So your parents are telling you the truth. Maybe you guys are adopted. Ooh. That'd make more sense. That's going to be what it is. Dude, there's no way you're not a little Mexican. But you look like your dad, don't you?

You look like your dad, yeah. And he's not Mexican or Mongolian? Dude, it's so bizarre. He's a dark Italian. Dark Italian, yeah, man. Yeah, but Brendan Schaub. Schaub. Schaub's German as fuck.

Yes. Yeah, you're one of those guys who, yeah, if you were born in like the 1920s and you would be a first-round draft pick for Mr. Hitler, he would say, come play with us. You are a big guy. Mr. Hitler. Mr. Hitler would say, yes, with us. You are a big guy. Mr. Hitler. Mr. Hitler would say, yes, yes.

Mr. Hitler. We want that one. They dye your hair blonde. They give you blue eyes. They give you a little crystal meth. They called it Panzer Chocolat. That's right. And they would say, you.

We'd march in the snow. Yeah, and you would have to go kill those Polish people. Unschleiser. Unschleiser. Dude, you'd be a nightmare. Scary. Imagine me with my fucking u.s uniform on and then you this fucking crazy just mma nazi running on me on meth just with fucking skinny jeans on just fucking tickling balls i'd be like i don't know what's happening just eating everybody's ass on the battlefield uh stevie also says it's okay for me to show you a dick pic yeah oh great

air drop that to me huh oh but show show us the non but i want to see it like for me yeah for you let's see it for me yeah dude i'm either gonna jerk off to his pick or eat this cake so my own private archive your private you want a picture of your friend's dick in your arm whoa wow that's the perfect tattoo too Homer Simpson that's exactly my face that's cat's face every night what a beautiful cock too

what a beautiful mushroom head he has my favorite dick look how thick that thing is that thing is fucking That thing is fucking... And look, perfectly shaved, hairless. I don't know why he has a Homer tattoo, but whatever. Dude, his... Look at his nuts.

His balls. Dude, his nuts. And they're... We're literally judging this man's dick. Look at how smooth it is. It looks like a Sphinx cat. What do you think that is? About eight, nine inches?

I would say eight. I would say a solid eight. I'd say like eight and a half, yeah. Eight and a half. Between eight and a half. Does it hurt? At first, yes. But then you get used to it. But then you get used to it. Okay. Yeah. I say like eight and a half, yeah. Between eight and a half. Does it hurt? At first, yes. But then you get used to it.

But then you get used to it. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, no, dude, look at that. I mean, great shape, too. Is he a tall boy, too? Is he a tall dude with water? Is he a short baby boy?

Little tiny foot, too. Little tiny baby feet? Cute feet. He's big where it matters. Yeah. He's big where it matters. There you go. Okay.

He's in crazy shape. Oh, dude, you can tell. My body does not look like that. Handsome kid. Oh, dude. I'm the ugliest one of the crew. But you're a cutie. like that Handsome kid I'm the ugliest one of the crew But you're a cutie I'm alright I'm the ugliest one of the crew

Who's the cutie Chappelle you Stevie looks good Chappelle Handsome Malik and my brother But have you seen Malik's hand Malik's

I've never seen Malik in person I remember Malik in person Malik looks like Jason Derulo Like Allie Cavern Nice Okay yeah He's Yeah okay

I'm the ugliest one Look at that The arms The beard Yeah he's just How old is he now He looks like Jason Derulo, like Allie Cavern. Nice. Okay, yeah. He's, yeah, okay. I'm the ugliest one. Look at that, the arms, the beard. Yeah, he's just, and how old is he now? 34. 34, still a young kid. Yeah. There you go. Oh, here we go.

This looks Latina, so I'm going to just stay quiet. Because if I even look at another Latina woman. She's so pretty. There's a problem. Yeah, this is. What is up, guys? My name is Silver. I'm from San Jose, California.

LA live-in. Shout out to you, Kat. I know you'd be repping SJ too. So, here's my dilemma. A year ago, I was definitely ghosted by a 36-year-old man. Grown-ass man, right? I'm 29.

Ghosting should be long gone. We're grown. But, given given no explanation because i was definitely blocked the whole nine yards so i took that to heart figured i was the issue got on my grind started working out eating right all that stuff prove it so a whole year later dude wants to come back now do i let him back in part of me is kind of like oh part of me is like you you me up so um what do i do should i let it ride should i say you help a girl out i need any more details on him yeah does he have that stevie blue eyes dick if he does then i'm going to say yes i'd, I'd like to say, I would be willing to bet yet another thousand dollars that as sure as I was,

that that Asian girl with the fakes would get up and have a dick and balls. If Silver, her name's Silver, Latina girl, name's Silver, guarantee you, everybody knew that. Guarantee you, you guarantee you if she unbuttoned her shirt took her shirt off 100 tattoo on the tit 100 it's a guarantee slam dunk tattoo on the tit tattoo on the tit 1000 print maybe a row maybe a name that eve maybe a name on there she so. It says Miguel across the top tit. And she probably is leaving out.

You're right. She's leaving out a lot of info. He didn't just ghost you either as a wife and family or you fucking blew his house up. You lit his car on fire. You did something crazy. I blacked out. And then you went home and made empanadas

and you forgot that you fucking beheaded his wife. She's talking all soft and shit. I got ghosted. I got ghosted. She didn't just get ghosted though she got blocked she might have killed his cat yeah she did something she did something she looks like she looks like a baddie though because she's gorgeous gorgeous girl but this is dangerous that's what yeah beautiful and crazy latina that's latinas in a nutshell that's latinas in a nutshell yeah spicy yeah my daughter i worry about my daughter man my daughter's just a little little latina that's latinas in a nutshell that's latinas in a nutshell yeah spicy yeah my daughter i worry about my daughter man my daughter's just a little little latina my daughter and now as my daughter's getting older i'm like fuck she looks exactly like her mom like it's gonna be a

problematic thing my father was saying from when my daughter's born he's like you better hope she looks like you you better hope that little girl looks like you because she looks like the kid's mother you're gonna have a problem i'm like yeah i know and she every day i'm like just send my dad pictures everybody's like wow that looks like your fucking girlfriend he's like i can't help you i can't help you i'm gonna be dead soon i'm like yeah dude i know it's gonna be a problem so i kind of hope i'm that's why people like oh what do you want a boy or girl i'm like i really would like of course just a healthy baby but i don't know if i could deal deal with two girls that are like mini me's two smoke show little yeah it's gonna be an issue it's just gonna be an issue but what am i gonna do are your

daughters how old five my daughter's five my son's five wow they should hang out imagine they get together they're both half latina half white oh Should we hang? Look what you guys just did When are the birthdays? My daughter's birthday is May 19th February 21st So your boy just turned 5 Yeah, mine's turned 6 in a couple months Okay

Bring them over by the crib Absolutely Everybody's out here, dude I came with the Puerto Ricans This sounds like An arranged marriage Yeah It sounds like some shit

My parents would have done to me It's gonna be great Is she active though Cause my son won't stop Is my daughter active Yeah dude She was up today At 5 o'clock in the morning

Cause we're still on New York time She put the Nutribullet on By herself with nothing on top She was just fucking Let the Nutribullet rip Yeah we were like We woke up And we were like

It was like She was like I have the Nutribullet going I'm like you literally Don't have anything on like, it was like, she was like, I have the NutriBullet going. I'm like, you literally don't have anything on top of it. She's like, well, put something on it. This is fun. A little play date.

Oh, my daughter's nuts. This guy's got a debate club. Now, Kat, let me ask you quickly, how much money to eat his ass? To eat his ass? Yes. Is love included or not? No love. This is strictly financial no he dms you on only fans and he's like yo cat name your price to eat this acdc ass

um is this being recorded for something or is it just no no no no no no no no no no no no no me just studio you walk in he's on all fours your only fans page we took it away you're not getting recorded for something or is it just no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no of here blue eyes yeah okay he's back in prison uh with the uh circumstance that you are like all the shower clean and prepped i will give you that for yeah we'll give you that one if like rent is due it's due babe i'm gonna say go i wasn't even thinking 10 if like rent is due i'm like i come from like refugee mentality of of a job is a job. Just do it well. Yeah, I hear you. I like this.

I was going to say like five grand. Five grand? Fuck. If I really needed the money. If I really needed the money. That's a good deal. For $5,000? $5,000, that's a good deal.

I would have given you anything. I have a blank check here. If you would have said five million, I would have said, sure, you go five grand? If no one else see this is why we have to go to war vietnam and we will win five grand wow five grand see if like rent is due tomorrow and i absolutely needed to pay it then yes five grand but if you're saying like realistically i'm talking about you're living in modern day los Angeles not in the rice paddies of Vietnam $5,000 will that even cover it

it's not gonna go a long way you can't yeah what the fuck is $5,000 you have to eat this guy's ass she was like rinse due tomorrow

$5,000 and I said I could have said no shower right after a shit and you would have been like $6,000 how much would you?

To eat his ass? Like right now. Am I horny or not horny? Yeah, you're turned on. I'm turned on, medium horny? You just saw Stevie's big dick. Clean ass? Yeah.

He's like a gentleman. And I've never eaten an ass before, so this will be my first ass eat. I would do this guy's ass, I would say I'd do this guy's ass for, I'd do it for a ass a four i do it for i do it for a million dollars because i put half in uh bitcoin so i know i make my money yeah i put i go right into crypto i put 500k in crypto bank oh that's a good point buy me a bitcoin i'll eat your ass so so bitcoin right now is 58 000 so you're a little short yeah so yeah do it for a bitcoin she can do it for a bitcoin she do it for a bitcoin yeah i yeah i do it for a Bitcoin. I would do it for a Bitcoin. She'd do it for a Bitcoin. I'd do it for a Bitcoin.

Yeah, I'd do it for a Bitcoin. Fully redeemed yourself, Kat. See, I didn't know the circumstances. Before you start talking shit about me. No, we're just talking about how much your cusses eat your ass, man. And it's a low price. He should be flat. Seems like a gentle lover.

I got that Jim Brewer fucking syndrome to where i look like i'm fucking baked but i actually haven't smoked in almost three weeks now i just this is how i naturally fucking look um it's your boy adam dirty out in was state making the girls shake remember that his name's adam dirty mostly they just shake their head no, but whatever. I got a debate clip for you guys. Would you rather have a night out with your boys or have a night in

with your girl? I know that's a hard thing to decide sometimes, so I'm going to see what my girl thinks about that. Babe, what do you think about that? There's no way he has a girlfriend. Yeah, he does. I think you should stay in with me definitely not listen to that bitch she doesn't know what she's talking about so anyways debate going out with the boys or staying inside love you guys uh shout out to culture corner uh chapelle if you ever want to do some karaoke

you know go out and sing a little bit of Matchbox 20. Get down on that. Hit me up. Link up with him, Chappelle. Yeah. Gang gang mobs. Eat his ass. For two mils. Wow, I wish I saw that before I answered. Well, it's 5,000.

Bring him in. That was so funny. We got a special guest. Happy birthday. Last year it was a barbershop quartet. Oh, that's right. You got a cake and not even Theo. What the fuck?

Oh, so with your girl. Not out with your boys or your girl. I'm a homebody, man. So unless I'm working, I'd prefer to be at home with my girl. I wouldn't stay at home with my girl. Unless I'm making money working, I ain't leaving the house. I'm the same. I'm at a point in my life where I'd genuinely rather just stay home.

That's that dad life. I don't want to be hungover. I want to wake up with my son at 5 a.m. Dude, even now, what time? It's 3.36. It's like my days. I've been up. My daughter woke up at 5.15. It's like I can, like I've been up, my daughter woke up at 515.

Yeah, me too. I can't, like I'm done by 6 o'clock, 7 o'clock, I'm done. I'm in bed at 9. Yeah, Andrew Santino was like, let's do the pot, he wants to do Whiskey Ginger tonight. He's like, let's do it tonight at 10 o'clock. I'm like, 10 o'clock, Andrew? Absolutely not. No, dude.

I can't even attempt, I'm not even remotely funny or creative after maybe 5 p.m. I can't do it. I'm spent, dude. I got to do it in the morning. Yeah, it's like I didn't do Bobby Lee's show. What's his name of the show? Tiger Bell. Tiger Bell.

I didn't do that for years. He kept asking. He's like, I shoot Monday nights at 8 p.m. Nah. Bubba, I can't. I got kids, man. I shut it down. Dude, I want to get to a point with ticket sales where I would only want to do one night

or if I'm going to do two shows, legit do one at five o'clock and seven o'clock like if i could sell sell and be like yo come out to a five o'clock show and a seven o'clock show because dude even the thought even the thought and i'm you know lucky and fortunate we're like where i go like the tickets are sold and everything is sold out it's beautiful but i'm just like sometimes like that 9 45 show i'm like i can't do this like i'm so tired just the thought of being on stage because it starts 15 minutes late and then the openers go on by 10 30 i can't do it i'm like i don't i as soon as i get on i want to get off and i'm like now i'm not giving a good performance for the people that paid and i you

know just try to muscle through it but i'm like i want to get to a point where i do five and seven that's like legit my girl i think she was asking me goals and stuff because my birthday's coming up i said i want to get to a certain level where i'm big enough where i either do just one show a night yeah or two shows in one night and come back home yeah oh yeah no gone thursday friday saturday i take less money i take i take less money to do one show yeah but the goal is you know like roan or Chappelle or Burr, like the big boy Segura, where they fly in one night, they get their pay and sell a shit ton of tickets and fly back home. Yeah.

Those are fuck you goals. Yeah, but now with COVID. But remember, they used to grind like us. Yeah, no, I know we still have to do what we have to do, but I mean I've been doing now, I've been headlining for six years. I mean, like 35 weekends a year, 40 weekends a year sometimes. So it's like, I feel like I've done it now. I've been every club.

I've done fucking eight, you know, the Wednesday to Sunday is a thousand shows for a thousand dollars, whatever it is. I feel like now I want to just like, I don't even care. There's no, I have no desire to be like a level famous. Like looking at you get canceled. I don't want to do that. I got a buddy. You guys would all know he got offered a big movie.

He's like, nope. And I was like, you're out of your fucking mind, dude. He's like, I don't get that famous man. He's like the shit I've said on podcasts and stand up. Like I'll get canceled. Yeah. He's like, it's not worth it. He's like, and for what?

Who gives a fuck? Movies? And it's all about having like a niche audience dude if you can have like 10 000 diehard fans there's billions of people on this planet if you just have 10 000 true diehard fans you'll have a career yeah you literally can have a career with just your life so my i'm done trying to chase like i want everybody to love me i don't care anymore it's like yeah i want the fans who like me to continue and keep them and hold them and serve them but other than that yeah i'm like dude i don't even doing this true tv show like you know i'm just like i'm doing it specifically because i'm out in la so i can do podcasts and if they find something i said on a podcast i want to cancel me i'd be like that's fine too yeah then i'll just go back to my fans in the book i feel

safe because of the podcasting. I'm like, you can't take – what are you going to take from me? Canceling me is what? Taking away my money? Okay, fine. You take away the money on TV. Fine. It's still there in the podcasting.

I still have a Patreon. It's still my fans are on the live show. That podcast is also how you sell tickets on the road. Because the people who get canceled for like real shit, it's like that's one thing. But people who get canceled for words, your fans are actually never going to leave you. Shane Gillis has probably got more fans from what he went through. If he was on S.L.U.,

he would have just came and went, dude. You know what the difference is with Shane Gillis? He has talent. He's a beast. That's what I'm saying. If you have talent and all you did was say a joke that crossed the line a little bit, but even though we're comedians

and that's what we're supposed to do, I feel like that's our role in society. Your fans, I doubt, are going to love it. People show up for Shane. Yeah, bro that as they should man but but it's also like you know with people we know who they've supposedly been canceled the public decides if you're canceled they'll give you a career if they'll look at all the evidence and they decide they don't hollywood now clubs i'd rather have my advertisers i want my career in the hands of the public. I don't want my career in the hands of fucking Colgate toothpaste. No.

Fuck you. Shout out Red Brant. Shout out Red Brant. Guys, this is Jake from Buffalo, New York. And I got a debate quote for you. Todd in here, Nick. Podcast merch. Who's got the best?

Right here, I got that cancel clothing on. My friends. Here I got the Thick Boy slash the Fire and the Kid, along with old Rollie Boy and Lacey up there. Oh, shit. H3 Podcast with their brand, Teddy Fresh. And last but not least, that Gang Gang Rat King hitter from this past weekend. What do you guys think? Who has it?

Gang Gang, go Bills. Go Bills. I was on the Bills for three minutes um as far as merch man he's asking who has the best the best i you know my favorite was chris well you know what the shit was going i used to wear his shit all the time the h3 they they do it right i was gonna say h3 is probably the best but you know the rest of isn't even really merch it's like a clothing line it's different yeah that's what't even really merch It's like a clothing line It's different

Yeah That's what Thick Boy's moving towards More of a clothing brand Clothing line Yeah Out of all that That they've showed on the bed I have to go with

Probably Teddy Fresh The H3 merch Out of that one But that's also Don't get me wrong That's a good Thick Boy shirt Sweatshirt But that's also not representative

We have some dope shit Like have you seen the Letterman jackets No I haven't He's so sick Yeah Look now he's selling you on his merch Look at that dope shit. Like, have you seen the Letterman jackets? No, I haven't. They're so sick. Look, now he's selling you on his merch. Look at that. I'll do it.

Well, the King and the Sting black sweatshirt is dope. Dope. Yeah, that Colin walked in with. Now, if we go off sales... I don't know. Did H3... They move major numbers, though, right? But you guys move the most.

You think you guys move the most? Thick Boy moves merch, man. It moves... There's a lot of thickies out there a lot of representative thick boy but h3 i'm not too familiar i know they're a married couple that started they're huge so i'm sure they do well i bet we both do well yeah yeah out of those yeah yeah i would say flagrant two moves a lot of merch too i think schultz sells a lot of merch tim dylan i like tim dylan's merch i haven't thanks for the shirt tim um yeah schultz he's interesting because he'll just take like a rip of an off-white shirt and put his name on it i'm like how do you get away with this yeah i guess he's but the merch is fire somebody sues you and also schultz thanks for the merch yeah he was like

your package is in the mail i'm like he's like i bet someone stole i'm like no i would know dude yeah no i i don't know i i mean i'd say but my thing like obviously everyone does merch i love fashion and merch right i'm not a guy who's like oh just put this logo on it like i'm designing putting it yeah i love it you love doing that i've been doing it forever i bet you i've been doing it longer than everyone on there you had merch even before podcast yeah oh yeah when i fighting, I made my own fight shirts. Really? Is that where the Abbot Kinney?

Abbot Kinney Fight Club, yeah. Dude, your merch should just be one of your cauliflower ears, just on a shirt. Just bang. I would wear that, dude. I'd be like, bite me. Gobble. Gobble. You get a cauliflower ear.

Should we close out with one Race My Case? Yes. What's this called? close out with one Race My Case? Yes. What's this called? Race My Case. Race My Case. Gotta decide what race committed this crime. And this is our boy, a listener, Judge Justin, who took our segment and ran with it. Is he an actual judge?

We don't know. All right, King and the Sting crew, I'm glad you guys enjoyed my last submission. Now let's get into the next one, huh? The video that landed in my lap today was really something else. In the footage I sent over to you guys, a man could be seen walking into a public restroom videotaping. Now you may think that's pretty odd, but wait until he gets around the corner to find a man using the urinal pretty normal, and then a random person sniffing his ass. The guy got a few lungfuls of that man's buttocks before standing up, and when he stood up, he noticed he was being recorded.

White. He gave the cameraman a weird look, and the walk of shame out of the bathroom was pretty bad. What race was he, boys? Gang, gang, judge, judge. Let's get into it. White. White.

White. That gives me white vibes. White guys love to eat ass, except for Chr white vibes. White guys love to eat ass. Except for Chrissy D. White guys love to eat ass. I'm going to get into it. I'm going to get into it. What's Blue Eyes doing later? Big reveal?

I would say white. Oh, there's a Worldstar hip hop video of it? Mm-hmm. Worldstar. Oh, it's Asian. Asian? Looks Asian. Is it Asian?

That looks Asian. If it's Asian, it has to be a Japanese guy. It has to be Japanese. Oh, he's sniffing his ass while he's pissing? Yeah. Oh, he's sniffing his ass while he's pissing? Yeah. Looks Asian Asian looks It has to be a Japanese guy He's sniffing his that's why he's pissing Who he caught him in the act Hilarious dude guys fart when they pee I always yeah Oh he caught him.

That guy's a freak. Oh, my God. What the fuck? Dude. I like how he's trying to walk out like nothing happened. Is this, like, recently? I don't know. I'm not sure. That guy's disgusting.

That's... I thought that was a prank. He was genuinely... Yeah, no, he's probably rock hard right now. Oh, a thousand percent, dude. Just rock hard. Wow. Just sniffing ass in a public urinal.

2013. How do you not feel that, though? The guy felt it, dude. He was turning the guy on. What do you think? The guy in the urinal didn't feel it, dude? The urine started to go up. He was hitting himself in the chin.

He was getting a boner. Hashtag stop Asian hate. It's just fucking. Stop Asian hate. It's a dangerous game to play though man Cause when guys are in the bathroom And everyone No one laughs

And it's just like Peeing Stop Asian hate You guys farting I'm always ripping farts Yeah Well that's what he was waiting for Yeah that is what he was waiting for

That's probably He would've probably He would've passed out He would've came He would've fell right on the floor Oh yeah Yeah Satisfaction right there

Satisfaction Well That's it We gonna dive in this cake, Nick. Let's do it. Let's do it. Feed me. I can't eat it.

Why can't you? Diet. I'm on a diet, too, though. It's my B-day. Yeah, I can't wait for you to work out with us tomorrow. I know. Well, if I fucking whatever my dumb call time is. Or Wednesday.

You got a call time Wednesday, too? Probably. I don't know, dude. It's the first day of filming tomorrow. I got a pitch on friday with comedy central oh you're in the pitch really what's it about podcast stuff cute i've i've you know worked with comedy central a lot i know you have i was i was like chrissy comedy central and then they just when the pandemic happened and they changed ownership they were like fine oh yeah

you hosted uh my cluster fest yes yeah yeah i was there i was their fucking boy i think i think i'm gonna do a 30 minute special with them why the hell not dude why the hell not might as well because they'll put on tv which i don't give a flying fuck about but they'll put it on their uh youtube on their youtube yeah oh god that's all i want and whatever dude just get the money up front gives make sure it's right money and that's it dude yeah because i feel like i want to push all my fans towards that. Towards that. Because when I did with Showtime, I was like, can you please put it on your Showtime YouTube?

I'm like, no, that's not what we do with specials. I'm like, all right. You guys are living in fucking 1997. You can't find your place. You guys just want to dig in. Yeah. Let's do it. Is this edible on top here?

Yeah. Yeah. If you want to eat ass for the first time, there's a Theo's ass on there. Oh. Oh. Eat that ass. Who made this Nick cake boss cake boss oh there's so many I gotta have a bite this what happens when you eat ass oh no it's usually messy hold on oh this is all sugar and frosting Look I'm eating Theo's ass How's it taste It's nice

Pretty good Is it good Yeah Eat one more piece for me Okay It is my birthday You can't Theo I'm eating your piece of cake buddy

I missed you I love you Missed you love you Stop Asian hate I do miss Stop Asian hate I do miss What else do Asian people want I mean they're fucking top of the class in everything.

Now we can't even hate them? They fucking get everything, dude. I've never met a non-successful Asian. Now I can't fucking get yelling once in a while? They're the champs. Asian people are the champs. Killing the game. All right, see, this is bad.

How many do I put in my fitness pal for this? Is this like... How many... It's right. See this is bad. How many do I put in my fitness pal for this? Just put is this like you think how many this is right? 300 calories two bites What you ate I'd say put in like a third of a cake slice Yeah, cuz you didn't need a full slice It's hard to just stop right I'm zoom'm going to tell you one more time. Zoom in on his face. It's my birthday. All right? One more bite, Nick.

Gosh, it looks so good. You don't want any? You guys don't want any? No, I'm good. You're not going to eat? You're also dieting? Huh? Not dieting.

I just have a thing. I can't eat too much sugar. Diabetes runs my family. Right. So you prevent it. And you don't want it. I'm scared. Just have a little piece. It is my birthday.

What do you think? It's my birthday. It's fucking good, dude. What's the difference? You lose one foot. What's the think? It's my birthday. It's fucking good, dude. What's the difference? You lose one foot. What's the difference? I lose one foot. It's legit one foot.

You can hop on your stage. Stop being a pussy. It's kind of liberating just diving into this. Oh, it's nice. There it is, dude. I feel like a rebel. Like you're doing something wrong. Yeah, I feel like a Hell's Angel the way we eat this.

I know, dude. I feel like immediately my heart starts to beat fast. I feel like I just got the vaccine. Yeah. It's so soft. That's good, Daddy. That's good. It's a little baby piece.

It's my birthday. Isn't it, Theo's? Yeah. It's not going to ruin my day. No. Are you guys afraid of food now? What's happening? Did you put on weight?

No, lost weight. No, but I'm saying, but did you- Oh, yeah. Really? The quarantine- During the quarantine? Your boy hit 272. 272?

I'm 260 right now. Probably 250. When you were- What were you before the quarantine? 260-something. Oh, you were always a big boy then. Yeah, I'm a thick dude. No, but you-

Hence the name, Thick Boy. Thick Boy. Thick Boy. But were you getting like a gut and everything and like tits? Or like you just don't carry it there? I don't carry it there. Were you carrying it in your hips and ass? I'm a little bit in my tummy. I was getting a little bit in my tummy.

Yeah, but it's gone now. You know, working on it. We were eating bad on the road. Not recently, but before we were eating really bad. It was bad, right? Like you wouldn't even attempt to- We'd go into town and no, and I'd eat a full rack of ribs. We were searching restaurants.

Brisket. Like the best shit. The best of the best. Getting desserts and shit, everything. Everything. Yeah. Not working out. And then you look at yourself in the back.

Yeah. I would just ride my bike every fucking day. I'm like, I'm like the fattest I've ever been. I'm averaging 30 miles a day. Yeah, and you were the fattest you ever was. But now I joined that zoo culture gym and your boys. Getting back, baby. You've earned it, Doug.

Ready to sign off, Nick? Yeah. Want to sign out? Oh, we were so... I didn't know if we were going or not, so I didn't want to say anything. Hell yeah, we're going. Hell yeah. Chrissy D, we love you, man. I appreciate it, man. I appreciate you guys having me. Yeah, man. This crew is in... Well, not this whole crew. Me and Chappelle will be in Spokane this Thursday, Friday, Saturday. All shows are sold out.

So we add a show Thursday late and Saturday early. So we get tickets Spokane, Washington. And then the next week, Miami Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Miami Improv. Baby, that's it. We love you guys. Theo, I miss you. Love you. Happy birthday. Happy love you guys. Theo, I miss you. Love you. Happy birthday.

Happy birthday, Theo. I'm in my pocket Run it up, run it up, run it up, run it up Sorry, not sorry, I'm bout to be late Pulled up to the city with nothing to say I just went ghost when I hit in my A And then I tipped a man when I dropped through the gate 24 hours and I ain't slept yet Money on my mind and I'll take that back Hourglass shape and a back on band Women that I love, I ain't met one yet

Women that I trust, I ain't met one yet Got a cross on my neck cause the boy so blessed Brand new in the game but the boy so fat In the comments so wild but the boy so daft And the boy so wild but the pants on stretch Attitude found make a grown man fletch Watch my white in the blacked out tent Fuck it I'm running up all of that shit like

I'm just, I'm just, I'm just poppin' I fell asleep in the Gucci pajamas My bitch look like drama She just with you cause she ran out of options Put my phone on silent Double the money and double the problems I got the game in my pocket, run it up, run it up, run it up, run it up. We'll be right back. Outro Music We'll be right back. We'll be right back. Outro Music