The Golden Hour - Episode 155: Too Much

Episode Date: January 14, 2022

Chri's D'Elia sits in the Culture Corner and the guys debate electric cars, talk Mexican Dentistry, racist voice texting, Chris' and Erik's wedding proposals, shopping cart NARCS, a heated (and sometimes gross) sex debate, an introduction of all new KATS Dating Game contestants (featuring a special guest with great hair) and much more! Get your King and the Sting merch at katsmerch.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Welcome to King and His Thing, brought to you by Riffin' with Griffin and congratulations. If you're a fan of mine, congratulations, don't watch Riffin' with Griffin. Hey listen, they probably don't anyway. You want to do a press run of what? I'm going to do Leno. Leno. I'm going to do Leno for kidding this thing. He only does.

The car one? I'll do his car. You're going to go in his cars and then just talk about your Ferrari? Yeah. I got one. He would probably laugh at both of you. I know. He has so many cars, right?

Oh, my God. Oh, he bums me out because every Sunday I go to the Malibu Cars and Coffee with my son, and he's always there, and he pulls up in a Tesla. And I'm like, what are you doing, dude? Did we start yet, by the way? Yeah. We were up. We're live.

Let me tell you something right now. We're live. We're live. So we started. We don't start with like a, hey, what the hell's going on? Nah, there's a whole intro. All right, well, let me tell you something about this. Okay.

Yeah. Um, Tesla's. No, no, that's it. It looks like we're too far. We're way too far. That's why we air. I know, but we air bump. But, um, Tesla's look like they were built on a factory in effect.

And I know they all are pretty much, but like all car, a lot of cars, but like, no, just, I don't like them. Do you like Teslas? No. I wouldn't think you would. Hate them. Why do you hate them? I'm anti-Tesla.

See, there we go. Eric would like them. You know, so I'm sure- I got an electric Jag, man. Okay. What are you talking about? I wouldn't even know what it looked like. Oh, you want to-

You have an electric one? I'm sorry that you don't want to, I don't want to spend $150 a gallon for my, you know, in your Ferrari. Well, you can thank your Lord and Savior, Biden, for that. Hey, don't look at me with that shit. You voted for him. He's in office because of you. Yeah.

You were the breaking decision. Imagine my one vote. I'm sitting in there like, ah, what do I do? It comes down to one guy. It's got to be assassinated so fast. But we can't get chips. That's a assassinated so fast. We can't get chips. That's a fucking out of standard. We can't get chips because of whatever Trump did with China.

Now we can't get a new car. Yeah, the transportation's a little dicey. I'm sure it happened. A veil fat joke. There was some guy out there. I almost didn't say it, but I didn't mean it. I literally thought. He gave you a fat joke?

No, no, no. It was like an underground fat joke like Pringles let me tell you you're talking about Pringles when he said chips you went straight to Pringles no no no

let me tell you what happened in my brain I thought chips and then I thought no not chips and then I thought I'm gonna say

I'm gonna say that and then I thought well I don't want them to think I'm making a fat joke but then I thought but I'm not though so I should just be me and say it and then I said it and then this motherfucker took it as a fat joke, but then I thought, but I'm not though. So I should just be me and say it. And then I said it, and then this motherfucker.

Took it as a fat joke. Yeah, it was. He just said it in his head. It wasn't a fat joke. My mind was doing all sorts of sifting, dude. Trying not to disrespect the guest, the co-host, really. Who's the guest? Me, I'm the guest. You're the guest, but you disrespected

the co-host. You know what you did? You know what you did within five minutes of being here? Fat shamed Eric. I know. There it is. Unreal, dude. There it is.

There it is. Unreal. You know what? I did fat shame Eric. But I'm sure like when back in the day when it was like steam powered cars and shit and when they went to gas, there was guys like me who were like, ugh, no way. Get out of here. No, you were still on your horse.

Like, what are you guys doing? What the fuck is that? He was just still running. You fucking losers. Dude, let me tell you something, though, dude. It's not the fact that it's electric. It's that it doesn't look good. It doesn't look good.

I'm 100% with you. That's why I didn't get a Tesla. I don't like that. I doesn't look good. I'm 100% with you. That's why I didn't get a Tesla. I don't like that. I just don't understand. Make an electric engine and take a Ferrari and put an electric sheet in there and make it look like that? What are you doing? Remember Prius?

What are you doing? What about the Leaf? Bro, I don't even know what that is. Nothing drives a girl up more than a Leaf and a fucking Crocs. It's called a Leaf. It's called a leaf? It's called a leaf. Well, the leaf comes with crocs. Yeah, it comes with a free pair of crocs and a hoax.

No, fuck that. Crocs come with a leaf. Dude. That thing was disgusting. Yeah. Dude, don't call your car the leaf for sure. That's it. Wow, look at that bullshit.

But also, Tim Dillon made this point. Teslas, it's like this weird cult, too. It is, yeah. It's like this weird cult, too. If you have a Tesla, it's like this weird cult thing. Well, the technology. They think they're better than everybody else. It's awful. Yeah, because you're saving the environment, dude. But first of all, the batteries in them, you know how they mine for those?

Yeah, I know. It's terrible. I don't know. Whatever you're saying right now sounds like the beginning of something that would be a conspiracy theory, and I already don't want to be on board. You don't entertain it? So I don't have a clue what you're saying. There's a lot of great electric cars coming out, though. Yeah, when?

When? When? I'm with you. They've been making electric cars for so long. About 10 years. About 10 years, and this is all we got. Look at the electric Hummer. I want to get an electric Hummer, but they keep pushing it back.

That's crazy. The Hummer looks pretty dope. Yeah, it looks dope. The Tesla truck is kind of dope. Another company, Rivian, they got a dope looking car, too. I want that, but they keep pushing it back. I don't like the name. crazy the hummer looks pretty dope yeah the tesla truck is kind of dope another company rivian they got a dope looking car too i want that but they keep pushing it i don't like the name rivian is better than leaf though yeah well but you know the rivian show that hummer's lit yeah i want to get that and the tires like they're cool shit oh the car can go like yeah you can go like diagonal

yeah don't you don't they can like a parking space yeah i can like do the dugie and yeah you don't we don't need that but you but but everyone's going to electric like even ferrari like the sf90 that was half electric that's the rivian all right i like the rivian i've seen it i've seen it thank you boom boom boom so i think in 10 years there won't be another there won't be gas cars anymore no that but a california newsome you know people go ahead newsome another conspiracy already i think it's 2035 you know he's in bed with the he's gonna start you know he's in bed with the what and you have to do it like that you know you know he's with the queen of england no no but he i think he's he's the first one to make gas-powered cars illegal in 2035. Wow. Oh, yeah.

He's not going to allow the sale of them anymore, which also sucked my dick. No, I don't give a shit. Just make them look cool. I don't care. 100. I don't care. I don't care. That's what I'm with.

Bro, they're not going to be – cars are going to be flying eventually. You don't need to have those big engines. They're gone. They're going to be gone. I had a buddy when I was in the NFL for literally three seconds. Me too. He got a big paycheck, and he took all of his signing bonus. Good idea.

This is in 2006. Good idea. And put all the money into flying cars. He invested all his money into flying cars. Well, he might pay off. He did it. No, he didn't. He works out like Ralph now.

Wait, check this out. A lot of those NFL players, they should have gotten a – you are a podcast away from having to work at Ralph's, right? What? What did you say? Yeah, this thick boy networked in. Yeah, I'll be bagging fucking groceries at Ralph's. You'll be at Ralph's.

No, but there's a company – this is how great their electric cars are going to be. There's a company right now, one of these startups, that put their battery in a Tesla and it went 780 miles. Jesus. Total or not miles per hour? Oh, okay. Miles per hour. 780 miles per hour.

Yeah, you got to be clear on that. Can you do the grocery store? Well, is it an airplane? No, no, no. Just it went 780 miles. Crashing right into the fucking destination. So that's the future because right now the problem with the cars is the fact that you can't really go a good amount of distance. Like I can't take my car to Vegas.

No, and they say 300 miles. That's not. If you're driving like Betty White, you're going through. Is your radio on? Is the air conditioning on? It doesn't really go that far. My favorite are people that are like, oh, it's touchless. I remember Brian got – he's like, look, it drives by itself.

I'm like, okay, we're driving to Brea, and that thing was fucking – fucking if the sun hits it wrong like veers over to the left he's like oh my god yeah people have died because they think it just they can just hit the button it's gonna cruise control yeah this goes back to my whole fucking thing and i always i always say this don't make the fucking thing until it works yes Yes. Dude, you know how, remember when, remember when Louie was, we went nuts, that bit on Conan went nuts and he was like, stop complaining. You're 30,000 feet in the air because your wifi doesn't work. You remember that bit that went viral? Anyway, there's a bit that went viral.

Dude, I completely disagree with that. Don't give me wifi if it's going to be spotty. I don't want it to be introduced into my life unless it works. Have you ever paid for it and then it doesn't work and you try to get a refund? It's just like voice texting. The shit don't work. Dude, I'm tired of it. My phone's racist.

Yeah, yeah. My iPhone, when I- Voice texting doesn't work. Yeah, I'm like, well, I did not say that. Yeah, I didn't say that. What the fuck? Oh, your phone makes- your voice texting is racist? Yeah.

Real racist, man. It could be that- My phone is racist too, dude. I was standing next to a black guy the other day. My phone goes, ew, get away. Yeah, it's fucking bullshit. And I don't stand for that. Dude, you know me?

I'm way against racism and slavery. I do not. I'm not into that. It sounds like a conspiracy theory. No, no. I'm with him. I don't know why, because they're in bed with the fucking. Yes.

Yes, dude. He's back. Dude, a fucking callback. 10 minutes in. Welcome to King of the Sting, dude. We're here live. This is how you got to start the Dude, a fucking callback. Ten minutes in. Welcome to King of the Sting, dude. We're here live. This is how you got to start the show, dude. Trust us.

Okay, give us the intro how you do it. King of the Sting here. Here we go. Thursday nights, we're coming at you late at night. You're a fucking loser at home watching this Thursday at night. King of the Sting. Here we go. Brought to you by, congratulations, the greatest podcast.

Hey! Yo. Can't be that? No. I mean, maybe if it's your show. What's this young man want? Oh, this you by Congratulations, the greatest podcast. Hey. Yo. Can't be that? No. I mean, maybe if it's your show. Brought to you by Congratulations. What's this young man want? Oh, this guy.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Let me tell you right now. Look at that beard. This guy is often around trees. It is 78 to 80% of his life, he is 10 feet from a tree. Chopping trees. Hit it. This guy deserves some congratulations.

He's giving us an update. He was planning on proposing to his girlfriend at a concert. Oh, is this the one? Yeah. Oh, how'd he do it? Do we know what concert it was? Josh Combs. Or he says it on this.

Who's that? Country artist. Luke Combs? Yeah, Luke Combs. Sounds like a country artist. It's Luke Combs. It's huge. Luke Combs.

He's great. Let's take a little break from chatting with the boys of King of the Sting. Because listen, man, a lot of you boys losing your hair. Two out of three bros will experience some form of hair loss by the time you're 35. More than 50 million dudes worldwide. All right? Well, really in the U.S.

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We got you freaking covered. Whether you're ready to pop the question or celebrate your love this Valentine's Day, you got to come correct on Valentine's covered, man. We got you freaking covered. Whether you're ready to pop the question or celebrate your love this Valentine's Day, you got to come correct on Valentine's Day, fellas. You got to shop at bluenow.com. Make your moment sparkle with jewelry from bluenow.com. Cats, listeners, and viewers get $50 off 500. This is a podcast exclusive.

It's good only through Valentine's Day. Includes engagement, all right? Use the code K-A-T-S. That's code K-A-T-S plus every order is insured, ships free, arrives discreet little package so it doesn't give away what's inside. Shop stress-free and find your forever peace. Go to bluenow.com today. What's up, Brendan, Theo, Stevie Weeby, Eric Griffin, Nick. Hope you guys all had a Merry Christmas.

What a nice guy. This is Josh from up here in Oregon. I was calling to thank you guys, man. Last time I called, I had some proposal advice for you guys, and you guys helped me out. I got that diamond hitter on my girl's finger. She said yes, and she said it was the best night of her life. Wow. Wow, he's short.

And doing our favorite song, and it just ended up definitely my best night of my life. With the idiot in the back. Hats in the way, though. I'm calling today with some marriage advice, though. For the kiss. Guy in the back. Her family's not really around, unfortunately, to help pay for the wedding, which is fine.

I'm totally down to pay for this wedding and work hard and, you know, get everything done. But this popped in my head this morning i'm just wondering if it's an appropriate question to take to my fiancee and ask her if she might be down to get scoey loathe you know that's the move dude weddings coming up buy a house yeah but buy a house correct take the money that you're gonna spend on your bullshit wedding invest in a house or something like that. Or you know what? Honestly, invest in flying cars.

It's time. Now is the time. Or a podcast network. Yeah, man. By the way, how about how good I was with saying he's always near trees and then he said he was from Oregon? Come on. Who am I, fucking Sherlock Holmes? I mean, I'm not.

You watch too much First 48. Also, you're crazy if you don't think that guy has calluses on his hands. No, no, he has calluses. You don't want a hand job from that. First of all, I think that you should get like the diamond ring and the wedding. Take that money and put it in something. Crypto. Whatever.

The diamond ring and the, so yeah. And don't even buy, honestly, don't even buy clothes. There's that point too, but also you need to get a fake diamond. Dude, I was at a- I don't even know. They're so good now. No, no, even buy clothes. There's that point too, but also you could get a fake diamond. Dude, I was at a- And she won't even know, bro. They're so good now. No, no, no, no. The real Gs, they take it to their place and be like, can you-

Bro, I love how you called the women the real Gs. The real Gs. That's good. That's good. We're girls of G. Because think how much weddings are, bro. You know what's going on. I was at a Clipper game one time, and I was sitting next to this older couple.

And the lady was looking at her ring, and the guy goes, he was like, she just got an extra diamond in it. And he was like, they got married 25 years ago. And he was like, yeah, it cost me $20,000 back then. And I said, man, imagine if you put that $20,000 in Microsoft. For real. And the guy was like, don't get me started. And she was like this.

The guy pulled out a gun and shot his brain. She was like was like don't get me started and she was like this pulled out a gun and shot his brain yeah oh dude she was like i don't care about that i remember it blew my mind when i used to be married fucking how was it which i still don't believe 87 i don't believe i never believed that he was married never believe it's so weird man did you make a mistake yeah well no dude honestly horrible decision no it was fine because like, I think that if you go through a marriage, you're fucking, you figure out a lot of shit. You know what you don't want? What?

That's what I'm saying. If you go through a marriage and it didn't work out, you know what not to do again. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, three, four marriages, then it's like- It's maybe not for you. And you did it before you had stuff. Yes. Yes, yes, yes.

So I forget what the fuck I was even bringing up. What the fuck was I bringing up? Oh, you were married before. Yeah, but the fuck i was even bringing up what the fuck was i bringing oh you were married before yeah but what the fuck was i bringing and it was terrible oh it blew my mind i mean i was like 25 but they were like we had a conversation and all the we were talking about the guys and the girls and they were like what what did you would you rather a diamond ring or like a really nice tv and a sound system set up and and all of the women were like oh a diamond ring and the guys were like what yeah it a diamond ring. And the guys were like, what? Yeah.

Oh, diamond close. Were you surprised by that? I was when I was 25, yeah. How did you propose to both your ex and your current one? How'd you propose? Did you put some effort in it? What are we talking about here? Yeah.

Did you do it on your podcast? Yeah, I did it live on my podcast. Congratulations, King of Sting brought you back. Congratulations. And riffing with Griffin. podcast. Congratulations, King of Sing. Brought you back. Congratulations. And riffing with Griffin. Yeah, yeah. Whoa, whoa, whoa. No, Eric, dude.

Eric can sing, sing. Sing, bro. He can sing, sing. I know, dude. It's annoying as shit. We did karaoke last episode. Yeah, but my voice was, we got to do it again because now I'm ready. No, fuck off.

You're a comedian. No, I had COVID. So now we gotta do it again because now I'm ready. No, fuck off. You're a comedian. I had COVID. So now I'm ready. I'm ready. Oh, wow, dude. I proposed. Whatever. I proposed. You know what I did on the first time? I went into the Wow, this is fucking ridiculous.

This is actually, I never told this story, but the first time I proposed, I did it at, I drove, I had, I was so nervous and I took it. We went to go see a movie and I pulled out over and I walked in front of the car in the headlights. It was at night and I just showed her the ring and then she came out and just started crying and shit. And that didn't work out.

Yeah. Do you remember what movie? Yeah. You want to know what the movie was called? Kicking and Screaming. Oh, with Will Ferrell. Yep. Great soccer movie.

No, not a great movie. And they get the Italians. Yeah. Great movie. How do you remember that movie? Love that movie. It came out so long ago. But anyway.

So not much effort there. Okay. So that didn't work out. That sounds awful. But you didn't have money. I didn't, no. So then the second time, did we learn? Yeah, jumped out of a plane.

Well, this time. Yeah, he was. Yeah, you had. Yeah, no. I, well, so we, I asked her. This guy proposed to. Outside of Culver's. This is my video.

Is this. Yeah, Chris wasn't in shape. That's you and your girl. Yeah. Yeah, that's me and her. The original six. And this was actually before COVID, but we had masks on. Um, yeah, no, it was, it was, uh, it was, I asked her at home in the beginning. Yeah.

I asked her at home. Yeah. She said she didn't want anything special. So I did that. You really took that to heart. They lie. They, she wanted something special. I said, are you sure?

900 times. Yeah. And, and, uh, I don't believe her. And then, so, uh special. I said, are you sure? 900 times. Yeah. I don't believe her. And then so. Now, was the. So then I did it. Was Calvin born already?

No, but I will tell you this. I did it that way. And then just to do it also, because just in case, I asked her again. To be sure. In a different way. In front of all of her friends. We were all got nice pictures taken for all of us because her friends got together. We were in St. Louis.

You probably had a lit outfit. I had to put my outfit was honestly, it was bang. I mean, it was bang. You got to be bang. You got to be bang. We have good photos. And so I asked her again in front of her friends because I wanted to do it the special way too. So if you asked her which one she liked.

Of course she liked that one better, dude. Exactly. That's what I'm saying. So she was lying all night long. I understand, but she wasn't lying to me. She was lying to herself. Yes. Yes, dude.

Because that's what chicks do. And I feel like Eric one-ups all of us because you're a romantic. Do you like to sing to your girl or some shit? No, I actually. Do you like a live? This comes in with the ring. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Yeah, I did.

You probably did like the live line. I was like, you are so beautiful. Wow, dude. Take a picture of black and white. Take a picture in black and white of you and put it on a fucking purple. Yeah, but. Take a picture of black and white. Take a picture in black and white of you and put it on a fucking purple. Yeah, but you fucked up and said black and white. Remember? Yeah, black and white.

Oh, yeah. What? Because I'm being racist, you're saying? That was my phone's fault. You're everything. Okay, anyway. But I propose to her. So actually bad, though.

She takes her ring off at night sometimes. And then in the mornings, she wants me to propose to her again. She doesn't love you at night. She takes her again. She doesn't love you at night. She takes it off because she doesn't love you at night. She just likes to cry. I only love you in the morning. Dude, I didn't even warm up. That's just crazy in the morning.

I'm the only one that can't sing here. Yeah, dude. I only do opera. That's good. That's good. But that's honestly, dude, if you can believe it, I didn't even warm up. But go ahead. Your girl likes to sleep single.

That's what's going on. She likes to dream single. Yeah. Dream single. she likes a dream single yeah dream single the new single dreams from the weekend i only love you in the morning but i dream of sucking dudes jealousy was on my singing i didn't know you had those chops you don't fuck that. You don't know about this? I didn't know that. Get out of here, bro. I know you're theater trained. We got to have daddy.

Yeah. Dude, I took fucking three years of voice lessons. You know how- Lazy eyes sit on the piano. Do me, oh, me, oh, me, oh, me. That's me. Him and his brother are like those German basketball players that don't go to high school. They just play basketball.

Yeah. That's what his dad did to them. He'd say, you're going to acting school. Yeah, yeah. Tight move. No math, no English, no science. Tight move, Papa. No, my dad honestly didn't want us in the business at all until he saw me shred the stage, dude. And then he's in.

And I don't say this, but until he saw me shred the stage. Anyway, dude, this is not a dramatic podcast. This is like Cats the musical all of a sudden. You know what I mean? Oh, yeah. King and the Sting is Cats, right? King and the Sting. K-A-T-S.

Cats. Oh, you're like light years ahead of all of us. What else you got, Nick? Welcome to King and the Sting. Brought to you by Riffin' with Griffin. No, no, no, no. And congratulations. If you're a fan of mine, congratulations.

Don't watch Riffin' with Griffin. Hey, listen. They probably don't anyway. No, no, no, no. If you're a fan of mine, congratulations. Don't watch Riff and Regret. Hey, listen. They probably don't anyway. What's up, Brendime, T-Ho, everybody else like cats? I can't understand it for you. This is the same guy as the last guy. I'm a divorced construction worker, and apparently my grill's all fucked up. How fucked up?

Chipped tubes, a bunch of cavities. Anyway. Okay, okay. Anyway, it's a trillion dollars to get that shit fixed. Yeah, fuck you, dude. Or just, you know, deal with it until the kids turn 18.

Part of me wants to look cute, but part of me wants to also, like, have money. So it's like, you know, how fucked up is it? Do people want me painting their houses looking like this? Or do I just, like, wear a mask and suck? Let me know.

Gang, gang. Nitrous buzz. Well, yeah. Save your money, dude. Yeah. I don't know how much it is and how much he has. For veneers, it's like 10 grand a tooth. It's so expensive.

Oh, really? So expensive. Really? V. It's so expensive. Oh, really? So expensive. Really? Veneers are so expensive. Well, honestly, from here, it doesn't look that bad. His teeth look fine. It's just chipnick or what?

Yeah, I didn't think it was that bad either. I think he can get it. His teeth are way worse. If he just has a chipped tooth, you can get a filling or something. It's also character. Like, that's a conversation star.

Like, girls are like, ooh, how many of your tooth did he make up some story? Oh, it's chipped a little bit. But also, you're a construction worker yeah yeah you don't need teeth at all no i don't care if you have teeth just do the work man you know what i mean he's just go toothless knock them all out that's not that bad no it's not terrible the bottom one's a great i'm sure he loves that we're zooming in on that but what is he doing with his money?

Not spending on teeth. Yeah, what's he doing? He's like, well, should I get teeth or have money to do what with? Invest in flying cars, man. That's what I'm saying. And also, you know he's got like a crypto wallet, this guy. I don't trust anything about this dude. When I've mentioned my teeth on the show, people have messaged me and been like,

if you go overseas or to Mexico, you can get it like 10% of the cost. And it's like, it's good work. It's just because they can't find customers over there. So go to Mexico. Here's the thing about Mexico, Nick. They don't have the same regulations we have. It doesn't matter anymore. You put Mexican teeth in and all of a sudden you're like, wow, these look really good.

What the fuck did you do? Why are you talking like this? Why are you talking? Wow, you really made them sparkly. Sparkly. It's like Home Alone. Oh, my God. Do we get the Chinese teeth?

But we won't do that. Well, that's why. Because the Asian, it was a bad year for the. Yeah,, that's... You know why? Because the Asian... Yeah, the Asian... We won't do that. It was a bad year for the... Yeah, yeah, yeah. We can still make fun of Mexicans now. Right, right.

You don't know next year, dude. So get it in, dude. Get it in. Asians, blacks, you cannot do it, dude. You can't have Asian teeth. Fill your cup with Mexicans. No one here is getting on SNL, though, anyways. That's true.

We're fine. That's true. You know what? That's true. Thanks, Nick. I know. Wow. That was my lifelong goal.

Yeah. And you won't be the producer of it either, motherfucker. That ship has sailed. Boom. We got a few more here. A lot of pink in the room. Christian has pinky on. Your boy has pink on, Chris.

A lot of pink. We got a few cats in the wild. Someone sent in Theo, what he's been doing with his free time. He's been trying to get few cats in the wild. Someone sent in Theo what he's been doing with his free time. He's been trying to get jacked in his room. Is that Theo? Never. Put somebody to the point where they can show you how hard it was thinking really big. That's Theo's

little evil brother. No. Fuck with the ones that I love. That's Theo if he was Benjamin Buttons and he's just about to die. Or like a voodoo priestess shrunk his head. Dude. That's Theo's little brother still living with his mom. Wait, what?

Here's what I think when I see that guy. Why is his wife being so baggy? I think, are we allowed to make fun of him? Oh, yeah. No, but you know what I mean? His TikTok's huge. Oh, wow. 6, but you know what I mean? Or is it? His TikTok's huge. Oh, wow. 6.5 million likes.

Did he have plastic surgery and didn't finish? You know what I mean? It looks like he's going through a transition, ran out of money. Yeah, something like that. Or he invested in flying cars. So what is the, what, he's trying to get jacked in his room? So someone sent this in. We do a segment called Cats in the Wild when they see someone from our crew that they think looks like us.

Here's another one. Here's Brian Callen on Cops. Okay. Our time. Season 33, bro. You know, Cops is still rolling. Cops is still doing season three. They stopped it for a little while.

They stopped and then Fox, like Fox on demand picked it up. The right wing news picked it up. Oh, wow. Yeah, they're still rolling. That does look like Theo. And we got one more. Someone sent in Eric down in Florida. He didn't like some of the regulations.

Once again, Florida law has taken away what's my God-given right. It needs to look like me. You know what I'm saying? You know what it is? You can't just have a mustache and glasses and be like, this is Eric. I mean, you guys have the same piece of shit. No, no. If you grab your mustache, you're missing it.

That's how you sound. Well, that's different. But take away my God-given right. He's like, thanks thanks florida i can't molest the alligators anymore we do constantly get people sending in ones they're like oh this is theo and it's just some guy with a mullet and it's really bad i don't like that funny try harder dude i agree i agree just like it's like give me a fucking i'm out of here uh a couple more

you understand oh hello hey guys this is JC from winners California and I have a king editor sing it for you I don't know if you've seen that youtuber partners who goes around shaming people for not returning their carts what do you think about that like I always return my car clearly kid is the back but I don't think I'd yell at someone for not returning their cart. Grocery cart? Yeah. Love you guys.

Gang, gang. Say buzz, buzz. Yes. Super cute. Well, I don't go to the grocery store because I'm not a peasant. I do, but I'm always worried someone's going to rat me out. I always return the cart. Always.

Wait a minute. What the fuck is this? I get super self-conscious. This guy's got a thing? What's he got a bulletproof vest on for? A lot of people say returning your cart is like a test of society, whether or not you're a good person. And this guy, he's got a really big YouTube channel, and here's his. Cart narts.

This guy's already terrible. I'm the founder of the cart narts. Cart narts. Sebastian. An independent organization that tries to get people to just take their cart back to the cart return. Is that Eric? Sebastian! Sebastian! Sebastian! Sebastian! Sebastian! Sebastian!

Sebastian! Sebastian! Sebastian! Sebastian! Sebastian! Sebastian! Sebastian! Sebastian! But we've had hundreds of encounters. I've had many threats on my life being a carton arc. Besides a guy pulling a gun on me, I've had multiple people say they're going to run me over.

Well, sir, that's not nice. I guess I'm a killer. Sir, that's against the law. There's definitely an adrenaline rush. Go f*** yourself, carton arc. How was that? This is my uniform. I have an equipment vest, which is actually a bulletproof vest.

I put my body camera right here. Capture. What a fucking loser. Lost in life, huh? Does he also give people tickets for, like, you know, if you park a non-compact car in a compact spot? You know what I mean? Oh, dude. Hey, guess what?

There are no compact spots. Parknark? There are no compact spots. That's a spinoff. That's a more important thing to talk about. Yes. When I see a motherfucking dude

how many cars are compact how many what 2% yeah and they have so many spots

there are no compact I go in with a big car and I come out and I eek out and I'm like this dude Stephen Hawking

when I'm coming out of it dude fuck em but also they have all the parking spots For Teslas now Well that at least At least

You know It's electric I mean electric cars Don't just say Tesla It's really Tesla though There's so many Teslas No dude that's bullshit Tesla's the new

Like 9-11 for agents In LA Like you know how many Agents drove fucking Porsche 9-11s Now they drive Teslas It's corny as shit They don't know cars

So they just get What's cool But this guy's a cart narc? This guy's trying to get shot. How's he not been beat up? He's trying to get shot. What do you mean he's going to get beat up? It looks like he's in Texas, too.

People are throwing him. He's been beat up. He's going to get shot for sure. He's going to die. It's sad. I like the spinoff for him, though. Poor guy has a broken brain. He's going to die.

Wow, two hotties in one show? It's so washed out. You don't know. No, we know, though. We don't know what she really looks like. No, she's easy on the eyes. Wow, two hotties in one show? It's so washed out. You don't know. No, we know, though. We don't know what she really looks like. No, she's... Yeah. Okay, play it.

She's easy on the eyes. Maybe the light will come into effect and she'll be like... Compared to the guy with fucked up teeth? Yeah, it'll look like Eric. Shut up. As a girl, you're not hot. I would be a very attractive woman.

Let's take another little break because I got a dilemma in my hands, man. I'm the only person that doesn't speak Spanish in my house. My kids talk trash about me. I'm pretty sure my wife talks trash about me, but you know what? I got a little secret up my sleeve. I got Babbel. That's right. Babbel. I'm trying to learn a new language with Babbel. It's the language learning app that sold more than 10 million subscriptions. I'm learning Spanish right now. That's right. Don't tell the

fam. I'm learning Spanish right now. The whole Babbel process is freaking fun. It's fast. It's easy. Babbel teaches bite-sized language lessons for real world use. Babbel's 15-minute lessons make it the perfect way to learn a new language on the go. I do it in my car before I drive home, man. All right. Other language learning apps use AI for their lessons. Babbel lessons created by over 100 language experts. You're getting the real, we're talking the real accents, all that stuff, man. With Babbel, you can choose from 14 different languages, including Spanish, your boys learn Spanish, French, Italian, or German. There's so many ways to learn with Babbel.

In addition to lessons, you can access podcast games, video stores, even live classes. Plus, it comes with a 20-day money-back guaranteed. Start your new language learning journey today with Babbel. Right now, when you purchase a three-month Babbel subscription, you get an additional three months free. That's six months for the price of three. Just go to babbel.com. Use promo code K-A-T-S. That's babbel.com, B-A-B-B-E-L.com. Code is K-A-T-S, Babbel, language for life. Oh, she's nominating her single friend.

Hey, Kat King. This is Savannah from Dallas, and I am nominating my best friend to be the next bachelorette of the Cats Dating Game. Her name is Shelby. She's 25 years old, and she lives in Austin, Texas. She is a hottie with a body, loves to work out, loves to be outdoors, super funny, and smart, and she's very passionate about what she does as an aspiring wedding planner so let's find shelby some love gang gang buzz buzz hold on hold on

there's a date wait what is this we do we kind of do a segment like the bachelor yeah dude and so we got married yeah no yeah from here yeah wow you're welcome you're welcome i know congratulations this is not a self-centered podcast no no no congratulations we're trying to help you by the way we try to help the world no i know and that's where you guys are mistaken because you know tune in for what i don't even this but i'll tell you uh they're gonna get divorced those people and you know that good chance right yeah i feel like that they felt going to get divorced, those people. And you know that. Good chance. I feel like they felt pressure to get married, but carry on. Oh, yeah, because they're fucking famous now, right? You don't say, yeah.

Her friend is a bona fide baddie. So now you have to find her a person. I think they're both hot. Yeah, next week we're going to have a bunch of submissions of guys who want to date her. And then we Zoom. And they Zoom in. We get to talk to them. Oh, that's funny.

Yeah, welcome to King of the State. All right. Highly produced. Don't make me feel insecure. Yeah, I know. But your show, one camera. One camera,'s funny. Yeah. Welcome to King of the State. All right. Highly produced. Don't make me feel insecure. Yeah, I know. But your show, one camera. One camera, one guy. Yeah, one camera, show.

One camera, one guy. One camera, one guy. If you want to date Shelby or a chance to talk to her, send in your submissions. I feel like we could link her up with Mark. My boy, Mark. We do have a second person who wants to participate in the dating game. Recognize my new favorite person. Why not hook them up?

Oh, this Mark. That's my Mark. Is this Braveheart? Look at the hoodie, too, dude. Sorry, Strong Guys. Is this Braveheart? Yeah, let's do it. What's up, ladies? My name's Mark. Mark Harley. 19 years old. Podcaster.

19 years old. I play stump But I also played the buff guy in that CDW commercial So As far as what I'm looking for in a lady Well she's got to be between the ages of 23 and 57 ideally And must do booty band glute workouts

At least three times a week As far as what she's looking for in a guy I need a woman who appreciates a muscular Male form A frame so jacked that Some guy, I need a woman who appreciates a muscular male form. A frame so jacked that some people, I'm not going to name any names, might consider it to be bordering on awful looking. You referred to Chris, but you thought of us. Somebody looking at all this and thinking it looks awful. I'm glad that I'm just thinking about it.

But if you think this Is too much beef In your butcher box Don't apply Aggressive No he's beefy I just don't like that he has wizard hair You know what I mean I don't know man

I love this guy He's fucking hilarious Like if Gandalf was Jack This is like Gandalf at 25 Man but uh, he looks like the lion from onward. He's no no no no no he's a deep cut as a dad Line from onward That's it they love onward such good he's Blanca from Street Fighter. That's who he is. Yes. That's who he is. If he goes like this, get the fucking,

and just eat your neck. Or more of a zang. By the way, he needs to scrub his tongue. There's the line from Onward. No, he needs to scrub his tongue too. Can we get him a tongue scrubber? His tongue's very white.

Yeah. No, but let me tell you something. All bodybuilders that are that big, they have to have bad breath. Like you have to have bad breath. Like, you have to have bad breath. Why? Because of protein? No, it's just,

it's like everything is weird and out of whack. You know what I mean? Like, dude, his hair. He does look like Blanca. That's Blanca. Wow, dude. He has a fucking mane on him. I feel like girls are going to come out for him, though.

But how, well, yeah, dude. Maybe we set him up with the- That's what to come out for him, though. But how? Well, yeah, dude. Maybe we set him up with the- That's what I'm saying. Austin Holliday. But how old is Mark even? I don't even know. He's 19. Mark's 36.

Bro, if you told me he's 55 or 20, I'd be like, yeah. Not 20. No, bro. He looks like he has too early gray hair, which he does. Yes. He's 35. Yes. He's 35, 36.

That's great, dude. All right. We got a couple of people looking for some I feel like we're going to get some submissions for Mark. Yeah. Yeah. So if you're a girl and you want to date Mark

Harley, send in a submission video, 45 seconds or under, telling us a little bit about yourself. And if you're a guy and you want to date Shelby, same thing. Or we can just connect those two, you know? Or if you're a guy and you want to date Mark, hit up Congratulations Podcast. Fair point.

I'll field those submissions. I'll field those submissions. We do only gay dating. For straight people. I guess this guy is great, man. It's for straight people, but it's gay. Actually, yeah. If you're a guy and you want to date Mark Harley,

please send those submissions in as well fair point yes yes this guy's the wrinkle huh the wrinkle that he's got

on his nose Jesus Christ he's got a quarter in there it's like his glasses are stuck you know what I mean does this guy start out his day with a punch

in the face hey is this is this guy's mom a sharp A what's happening here yeah really jesus he's got a he's got a snob on that was an asshole you couldn't get this shit out no matter how many times you wiped you didn't have streaks he's this guy he's had a rough year so he explains so no this guy will be standing with that no fuck that dude tell us

later so we we get all the jokes out you don't have to feel bad about it. No, that's true. Or something, but what's up, I guess. It's Hunter from Auburn, Alabama again. Wow, Hunter. And this New Year started off pretty rough, man. This Bama team lost too. Part of the New Year is with COVID, so I had to stay at home.

Then about a week later, I got charged with shooting into an occupied dwelling, and now I'm facing life. By that I mean my girlfriend's pregnant. I trusted the on the period conspiracy theory. So yeah, I was just seeing if you guys had any advice, especially you, Brendan, since you've gone through this process. Wait, what did he say? She was on her period.

He's just looking for some advice from someone who has kids. From a what'd he say? She was on her period. He's just looking for some advice from someone who has kids. From a dad? Okay. Me and Chris can do it. Does he get lip fillers? Now you woke up like that, man. No, I guess it starts the day with a punch in the face. He got those DSLs, though, huh? He got those

DSLs. All right, bro. Look at him. All right, bro. They're freaking juicy. Look at him. Dude. For fuck's sake. This guy is all, everything on this guy, his hair and his face and his lips and everything is all the same color. So he wants to know he has-

He wants to know- He knocked up his girlfriend. He's just looking for some advice, words of encouragement. Now those first six months are going to be, you're basically a Navy SEAL in Bud Camp. You're talking about. Yeah. Okay. But wait, hold on though.

You're missing a key point here. He said he had sex with her on her period. Yeah. She lied. And still she got pregnant. Me lied. Well, unless. She lied.

What? She was on her period? Yeah. She was like, no, you can bust me. I'm on my period. It doesn't matter. Okay, but I'm saying you're bleeding if you're on your period. Well, listen, he's not a detective.

Are you a no period sex guy? No. I am. Really? Oh, yeah. No, you're not, or no, you are. Whatever. It doesn't matter.

If my girl's on her period, what's the difference? Yeah, I don't care either. You won't do it? I'll hard out. Why? Really? Blood? Bro, I don't care either. You won't do it? I'll hard out. Why? Really? Blood. Bro.

You were in a ring. Are you getting your face pummeled? Hey, I'm sorry, Ted Bundy. No. Are you fucking, are you shitting me? I love a good period sex. That is such a good point, though. You would beat the shit out of people in a cage.

Not because I want to see blood, you fucking savages. But there was blood. You don't have sex because you want to see blood, you fucking savages. You don't have sex because you want to see blood either. Correct. Okay. Just put a towel down. Or wait.

But it's fucking blood, not shit. Are we serious? Are you fucking kidding me? Even shit. Even shit. No, I'm out. anal, you know, it happens. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Even shit, no, I'm out. And for that reason, I'm out. And now you're on my team. Hello, sharks.

I'm inventing a new thing, shit sex. No, and for that reason, I'm out. Eric Griffin's like, Eric Griffin leaves. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Dude. You're a freak. No. That's not freaky.

Shit. Blood doesn't bother you. Shit doesn't bother you. The smell of shit in the bedroom. Yeah, the smell is too much. Okay, morning sex, there's all kinds of smells regardless. Not shit, though. Well, you never know. I'm saying if you're a girl, relax a bit. I mean, if you've ever. That's different, though. Well, you never know. I'll say, if you're a girl,

if you're not into anal, if you've ever had... Oh, that's different, dude. If you do that, and then there's a piece of shit that whoopsie-daisy flies out. That's what I'm saying. But if you pull out

and you look like a chocolate-covered something around your neck... Chocolate-covered banana? It's too early. It happens. Dude, don't say what you just said. It shouldn't happen. Bro, you shouldn't have.

Did you say chocolate-covered Krohler? What did you say? I said chocolate-covered bananas. Yeah, they're like a banana. Disgusting. Just say chocolate. Disgusting. You just go right to the shower.

You don't walk around with a bloody shitty dick. What about the stench? Bro, what if you're in public? I'm sure you've done some crazy public shit. No, I don't really do public shit. Dude, I'll tell you what, man. You've never been in a car? Yeah, but that's not public.

That's in the privacy of my car in a Ralph's parking lot. Hey, Nick and Chin, are you guys on board with this? I guarantee you Chin doesn't care. I care about the shit, but the blood, I don't care. Yeah, dude, blood is fucking, that's natural. It's natural. It's natural. It's once a month, it's natural.

Shit, do it on the toilet. Fucking Hannibal Lecter over here. No, it's not Hannibal Lecter. I'm not. That's that good, man. I know. It's just around your dick. It's like.

Lights off. You can't tell me. You know what? I'm actually surprised that you think good. I know. It's just around your dick. It's like... Lights off. You can't tell. You know what? I'm actually surprised that you think that. Yeah, me too. I'm surprising you guys and old shit McGee over here. No shit. I get that.

That's gross to you. I'm not saying it's not gross. But the blood king is. That's it. You two are cool with the shit? No. No, no, no. No shit. Wait, wait, wait. Hold on a second. No one's shit? No. No, no, no.

Wait, wait, wait. Hold on a second. No one's cool with shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's not. The point is, I'm not trying. It's like, oh, you're on your period? Yeah. It's not like that.

Well, that's what it sounds like. No, no, no. That's what it sounds like. No, dude. No. But Eric is definitely like, oh, don't go to the bathroom yet. Let's bone. You do that, dude.

Hey, did you have curry? Let's backdoor bone. Yeah. Also, you know Hey, did you have curry? Let's backdoor bone. Also, you know, when he's having sex, he's talking about his own shit. Yeah. Yeah, you pull the strap on out. No, no, dude.

You're just, no, not even. You're still having sex. You're not into pegging? No, no, it's not pegging. No, it's not pegging. You're with your girl, you're inside her, and then you just go,

oh, shit. Shit at the back of you. Will you marry me? And you're on top, and you just go oh shit at the back of you will you marry me and you're on top and you're on top that probably be like a weird sensation you know what it would be

such a release yeah that's what I'm saying and you'd cry imagine if you come and shit at the same time that's probably really good yell some freaks

we took a turn without Theo Theo would be so disgusted right now. I told y'all I wouldn't be talking about this shit. Yeah, Theo. Oh, he'd for sure come and shit at the same time. No, Theo would be like, I don't want to talk about sex at all, right? Yeah.

Yeah, I get it. What's this? She's got a debate club for us. What is up today? It's because of this motherfucker. This motherfucker right here. I think Chris is going to be on. It's usually just all hairy dudes.

Yeah. What the fuck's going on here? Even Mark Harley was a hot chick. For this show, yes. She's got a great accent, too. Wait, hold on. Before we even go, what great hair she has. This is amazing hair. Who's better, her or Mark? Yeah, that's the poll. Put that poll up. Hey, guys. This is amazing. Who's better here, her or Mark?

Yeah, that's the poll. Put that poll up. Hey, guys. Jacinta J here from Melbourne, Australia. I'm a long-time listener, and I've got a question for you all. So we've already discussed when is an appropriate time to start setting up the Christmas decorations, but when do we start taking them down? The day after Christmas.

I see some people, you know, they're ready to turf those Christmas decorations on the street the day after Christmas, like they're kicking out a drunk uncle or something. But then I see other people who just want to make the most of the decorations, and they're still kicking it with a Christmas doily and

antlers on their car till like February till mid-March. Disgusting. So when do we start taking the decorations down? Let me know. Gang gang, buzz buzz. Buzz buzz. After New Year's. No, no, the shrimp on the barbie. I agree with you.

After New Year's. No, dude. It's over. Who wants to fucking do all that much work the day after you're off? It's still the holiday. The New Year's is part of Christmas.

No, no, no. It's the taint. It's the taint of the fucking year and after the first is when you take it down. Eric, you've changed, dude. What are you talking about? Christmas till New Year's, anal sex.

This is insane. Anal sex. Dude, hold on. Don't forget the blood. Yeah. I was going to let that one slide. So hold on. Well, first of all, Kristen, it's insane.

Rachel too. She put the stuff up. Yeah. We were talking about this a little bit earlier. Eric and I were talking about this a little bit before the episode and I said, Eric. Save it. Don't blow your load. Let's talk about this on the podcast earlier. Eric and I were talking about this a little bit before the episode, and I said, Eric, don't blow your load. Let's talk about this on the podcast because it's going to be utterly hilarious. Okay?

Now, but Kristen will start. So she'll put it up before November. Yeah, yeah. Oh, you're in that? Yeah, yeah. Wow. Listen, listen. Rachel had Halloween shit up.

Yeah. Oh, Kristen has a skeleton band that she put. You press a button and it's like. Oh, no. See, I dig the holiday spirit. But once that holiday's over, you got to adjust. It's over. My thing.

We did have pumpkins in the window a little bit too long. My thing about Kristen is if you're bringing, if you're expanding Christmas that long, then it takes the fucking fun out of the actual amount of time. Correct. You're just diluting it, right? Correct. You do Elf on the Shelf? We got it this year. Exhausting.

Exhausting, yeah. My chick has Valentine's shit up right now. Here's the thing here We got kids, so it makes sense You don't have any kids, man She's just practicing Fair point

Training camp Yeah, I don't know about this But I think that, this is what I think Because I said to her, she put it up before Thanksgiving I said, what about Thanksgiving stuff? And she literally said What's Thanksgivinggiving she just loves christmas that much that but but and i love christmas her name is almost christmas she just wants to get to it she wants to get to christmas and she loves it and she she loves it and it's and she loves if you have kids it's great yeah oh but also take the tree down on the 26th our trees still no bro

it stays until the freaking 1st. It should be January 6th. That's the epiphany when the wise men finally made it to the nativity. 12 days of Christmas. Tell this heathen. Tell this heathen. Fake news. Tell this heathen.

Fake news. Wasn't that the day of the fucking, when they stormed the Capitol? I'm just saying, dude. Somebody's in bed with somebody. You're the wise men. Yep. That's the wise men. There you go.

And you know Joe Biden will never be president. You know that, right? This guy's got another debate club for us. This is usually the look. All right, let's go, crew. I got a little debate club. So what is worse to have? A super hot mom growing up with?

When all your boys just want to bang your mom? What if he was like like or a million dollars what? how is this a question? ugliest mom to where like you don't even want to bring her out because you're embarrassed

oh no no and uh all your boys just make fun of you for having like a really ugly mom you know kids don't let you get by

with anything let me ask nowadays they'll find anything to make fun of you like you can't win you can't have a hot mom nor an ugly mom wow such deeper issues yeah fucking bust

your balls over it Wow anyway my question my question is was his mom hot or a warlock yeah I wish she added that and I also have a good-looking guy so mom's probably I have another I have another stop talking about how good looking the guys are though that I know I did. But you said the other guy had dick-sucking lips. Anyway. We did. You were talking about Mark, and then you talked about anal, dude. Hold on.

Does anyone listen to this show that doesn't wear Carhartt? I swear to God, everybody. Answers, no. Yeah. A lot of cows, hands, a lot of Carhartt. I don't know what's better. I've actually never thought about this. Having a hot mom.

If your mom's a fucking... That's better? Yeah. If your mom's a warlock, you're going to probably look like shit, too. Good point. I'd rather have a hot mom. You know what I'm saying? Well, it also depends on the age.

Let's say your mom had you when she was young, and then if you had a young mom, and then she's looking delicious, and you're 13. Listen, you don't want any warlock genes in your family, dude. When your kid comes out as a warlock. You're right. I'd rather deal with a hot mom all the time. Your friend's like, dude, I'd love to titty fuck your mom. Titty fuck.

You know what I'm saying? They always want a sleepover. Yeah. When you have an ass sleepover. Eric will be like, can she shit? Eric's like, man, I'd love to fuck your mom in the butt. All right, dude. That's a lot.

Yeah, bust all in your mom. You know what it is? It's the way. You brought it up. No, I know. But it's the way. You brought it up. I do. That's a lot. Yeah, bust all in your mom. You know what it is? It's the way. You brought it up. No, I know. But it's the way. You brought it up. I know, but it's the way you do it.

See, that's the universe right there. Is that Theo's not even here and he's busting me. Yeah. All right. Theo just pressed a button from Nashville. Hot mom all day. You don't want a warlock in your family tree. Maybe a good point.

Anybody have a warlock for a mom though? You would know, yeah. No. My mom's pretty good looking. My mom all day. You don't want a warlock in your family tree. Maybe a good point. Anybody have a warlock for a mom though? You would know, yeah. No. My mom's pretty good. My mom's cool. My mom's big. My mom's about 5'11".

Wow. My mom's big. My mom might dunk all up on you and put her titties in your face. All right. Well, okay. This guy's got to get your tits. At the same time?

Sure. You're talking about separate. She'll dunk on you and then after that you'll have a drink, take a shower, and then she'll put her titties all up in your face.

No, that's different, dude. That's different. And she'll be on her period, so you know what we're going to do after. Eric's disgusting. Yeah, some of these guys are my homies. The hat. Hey, hold on. Pause it.

Pause it. Is this guy from 1997? Is that a tap out hat and affliction shirt? What I don't understand is, do all the cats people just like lazily do these videos like well I'm on the way to work. So let me just do the video effort Have a ring light. Yeah, I'm gonna ring light. Look at the video starts Starts on his jean coat jean started on your face. No, those are Jordans. Also, here's the best part.

He's not even, is this a passenger seat? Yeah, it is. So there's somebody else driving and this guy's just doing this shit? Yeah, his friend's like, what the fuck are you doing, dude? He looks like Rob Dyrdek if Rob Dyrdek was on drugs. Yes, he actually does. Yeah, some of these guys are my homies. What do you think about it, King?

I'm not understanding it. Migrant workers at Home Depot. What? Some of those guys is cool to me. I don't know. And if I'm out of work, I'm over there too. You never know. Gang, gang, bung, bung, or whatever.

Bung, bung. Oh, that's our excuse. It means shit. Shit. Bung, bung. Gang, gang, bung, bung. I think that's our X because it means shit. Shit. Bum bum. I think I'm going to pass on this one. I'm definitely going to pass

if I drive because sometimes you need work and those guys do good work. No, get that money, bro. If there's a white guy in a tap out shirt, I'm... Just Mexicans.

Just Mexicans. Oh, you're saying... Just the Mexicans, though. But get out of here. No whites. You're saying it's a dicey subject to talk about? Yeah.

Especially the way he brought it up. He was like, I like him. It was a little like Theo-ish. You know what I mean? He goes, there's still humans to me, which made me feel weird. Yeah. It made me feel weird how he was like, what do you guys think about migrant workers, huh? I kind of like them.

It's like saying, I have a black friend. You know what I mean? I don't like it. Which that guy doesn't have a black friend. Yeah, for sure. What's's up king of the sting it's uh blake here wow i'm gonna say hi to you all but i don't know who's all on the show anymore fair point just kidding um yeah it's uh negative 20 something degrees here in wolf point montana and i am trying to get truck started. Diesel fuel has froze. Negative 40 degree windshield.

About to get my meal prep in. Why are there so many? Bring it with me on the road. Yeah, so King it or Sting it. Negative 40 degree weather. Heart Sting, dude. Love you guys. What are you talking about? Who the fuck would King it? What kind of dumbass King it or sting it is this? King it or sting it.

So, hey, guys, here I am at my house. I just showed up. My whole family's dead. Somebody murdered them, and it's terrible. They got stabbed and gassed and shot in the head. And I'll probably be framed for it. I'll probably be framed for it. King it or sting it.

I'm going to do that. I told you guys before I called the cops, so they're going to say that's weird. King it or sting it. Getting stabbed in the gut or getting a million dollars. Which one do you prefer? Why would you want to live in that? Hard sting, man. I fucking hate that.

Move. For sure move. Move. Sting it. Montana, but you have some good months there. Montana? Montana's great. Hey, dude, but have a whole good year.

You can have a whole good year somewhere. Yeah. The worst part of that video is that noise when you crunch on the snow. You're like, oh, I've been there and it's freezing. But did you grow up in New Jersey? I grew up in New Jersey, but I'm saying on the road sometimes you do fucking and you're...

I did Buffalo and a snowstorm. What's the coldest place you've ever performed? I played in... Buffalo is freezing. I played Buffalo middle of the winter And it was a snow storm And I was like I'm going to sell zero Take it

People showed up on snowmobiles For me it was Alaska Okay you won No I did North Battleford way up in fucking Canada And it was just so freezing Miles Montana is another one The guy actually asked me, the hotel I was staying at,

he was like, are you here tomorrow? And I was like, what's up? I was leaving, but I just knew what he was doing. He was like, we're going to go ice fishing. I was like, oh, I'm leaving.

And he was like, it actually is really warm in that little thing. I was like, I don't, if you have to say it's actually warm. Yeah, that's true. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Is it warm because you're snuggling with dudes. Compared to what? But also, you ever been to Montreal in the winter? No. Awful. Awful. Isn't everywhere awful in the winter?

Chicago's terrible. Yeah, pretty much. Chicago sucks. Like, seven days out of the year, Chicago is nice. Yeah, it's lit. It's either too hot or it's too- No, it's real muggy or it's- Yeah.

Yeah. What's this thick you want? They all look the same, all these motherfuckers. Wait, this is the same guy. It's the same... No, this is for sure the same guy. It is not. They all look...

They're all in the same car. Put the video up side by side. They all look like Roy Nelsons. And that's our fan base. That's fine. I need to see a side by side video of this guy and the last guy. Look at the fucking... This is the same fucking guy!

Also the dude with the big nose even. He's... That's him without the fucking... This is the same fucking guy! Also the dude with the big nose even. He's... That's him without facial hair. This is the same guy. He shaved his mustache in one. Did another video. This is crazy. This is like, yeah.

Wow, this is insane. And with the hood, too. Yeah, same color hood. It is winter everywhere. Okay, maybe it is the same guy. It is winter everywhere, though. You know? True, true.

All right, let's see. He's in a car, but yeah. What's up, Thong Von and Brennan Showers? What? Tim here from South Orange County, California. Okay right, let's see. He's in a car, but yeah. What's up, Thong Vaughn and Brennan Showers? What? Tim here from South Orange County, California. Okay, what's warm there? I'm here to sting it for you. What's warm there?

What do you guys think about those midday jaunt hitters at work? What? You know, you may be going on a little 30-minute break, take a little puff, puff, a little jaunt. Yeah. Let me know what you guys think about those midday hitters. Hey, man, whatever gets you. I watch the podcast all day at work. Gang, gang, buzz, buzz.

Buzz, buzz. Buzz, buzz, big friend. Whatever gets you through the fucking day. Yeah, honestly. If you're going to get a nine to five, do whatever you want. I love when people say, like, I watch your podcast all day, and it's like my podcast is an hour. Dude, when they say, when they say, people say like, I watch Congratulations every day. And it's like, no, you don't watch it every day.

It's once a week. It's once a week. You don't watch it every day. Stop lying. Well, they put it on the channel and then just let the episodes. Maybe they watch old ones though. Yeah, they're doing on demand. You're mean.

You know what? You're mean, huh? No, I am mean. You mean. But also specify that to me. That's fine. So I've seen them all. And what happens is I play it and I can sit there and have a conversation.

But also don't have your hood up in Orange County, you know? That's what happens. That's fine. So I've seen them all and what happens is I play it and I can sit there But also don't have your hood up in Orange County. That's what happens when you move from I bet you that guy's from like Wisconsin and he moved to LA and then you get used to it.

So it's probably 65 and it's cold to him. Oh, this is cold now. I'm always cold. Your skin looks cold. I'm always cold. I'm a weird color. I'm a weird color.

Are you weird or are you just really white? I'm a weird color. You're like Twilight White. That guy's really white. He's not a weird color. Correct. I'm a weird color are you weird he's just really white i'm a weird color but bro you're like twilight that guy's really white he's not a weird color correct i'm a weird color you're like off pink i look like i'm about to die and that's fine dude i did the fucking yeah um last uh fighter and the companion i did was um fighter and the companion that's fine yeah dude just a little rhythm it's a movie you know what i mean you. It's okay. But no, the last fight I did, people were like, oh, he's going to die.

I'm a gray guy. You're gray. I'm a gray guy. You're a gray worm. I'm gray. So that guy, yeah, dude, if you've got to smoke a little bit weed. But here's the thing, though. Some people smoke weed and it's fine.

Some people smoke weed and they just change. They're out of hand. Yes. Yeah. You're like, oh, dude. Like, I'm friends with people who smoke weed all the time, every day. And then some people I had to be like, dude, I can't be your friend anymore. But like Rogan has smoked weed.

You have no idea. That's what I'm saying. Rogan's not. But I don't know anyone that smokes weed and they get mean. No one gets mean on weed. No, no, no, no. I drink every day. I look dead there.

I don't know what I'm talking about. I look dead there. You're white. You're super white. You know what there. I don't know what I'm talking about. I look dead there. You're white. You're super white. You know what it is? I'm the same color as that shirt. Yeah. What's the deal with that?

My hair is kicking though. My hair is kicking. White people aren't supposed to wear orange and yellow. Bad for complexion. Oh, you're so right, Nick. He's from Wisconsin. You don't say that on air. I like how you're turning into your dad.

I know. I know. His dad's got a nice name. How has the response been on the neck tattoo? I mean, dude, with my brand of humor and my fans, all they're going to do is try and roast me because they think it's funny. Sure.

So I don't really know, honestly. I dig it. I'm sure there's going to be a bunch of life rips and all that stuff on your necks. Oh, there are. Yeah, some guy had it. I had this scheduled and I was going to do it in two days, and somebody posted on Instagram, life rips right here.

I was like, oh, that's so funny. He beat you to it. Same thing, yeah. No tattoos for you, Eric? No. No. That's where you draw the line? Shitting and blood?

I stopped there. Ew, ink. The next is, yeah. It's the pain of it. You should get one at the cat Cats bachelor party for Eric next year. We do got to do a bachelor party. Strip club tattoo. You want to go to Costa Rica or something and get weird?

What are we talking about? Okay, listen. Rachel is not into that. I'm not asking Rachel. Yeah, but she's already like, if you're the kind of person that has to go to a strip club, and I'm like, okay. Well, let me tell you something. If there's one place that is a safe place that we can talk about it where we know Rachel is not going to listen, it's right here.

It's right here, dude. Right here. So we're going to set up your bachelor party. Oh, my God. Are you doing any bachelor party or anything? I probably won't, no. Yeah. Look at you, piece of shit.

You know you. It's a little different with me. We'll do a good. You know what? We'll do a canceled bachelor party for him. We'll do bingo. I bet as soon as he's like, hey, babe, I'm thinking of a bachelor party. She goes, no, you're not. You're right.

She goes, but you know why. I don't need to do that shit. I told her we could do a joint thing. Oh, okay. Not that. Go to Vegas. No, no, no. Just don't do one.

But don't do one. But don't do one. But don't do one, man. I'm sure you were a monster at yours. Define monster. There's no blood and poop. I'll tell you that much. Yeah, but there was probably a few boners. Just bags.

Just bags of shit. Hey, here for the Griffin Bachelor. Like a fanny. Like a fanny. Like a fanny. Bro, how do you manage to make everything grosser? You! I can't believe this! We started, and you are like, finish him.

With the bags of shit. Yeah, we were throwing shit like confetti. I go all the way. You're telling me they're bringing bags of shit to my bachelor party, and I'm just saying, this is what we're doing with it. Yep. All right. Okay. We're finger painting. And I'm just saying, this is what we're doing with it. Yep. All right. Okay.

We're finger painting. Have we set up honeymoons? Have you done that? No. No. Not yet. All right. No bachelor party, no honeymoons.

If we go on a honeymoon, we're going to miss your wedding. Yeah. So I don't know what we're going to do yet. Or just do it. Dude, I don't understand why people have to go right on the honeymoon. I did that right. I did it on my last one, and it was stressful, dude. Yeah, it's a lot to plan.

It's just like, yeah, it's a lot to plan. It's not stressful when you're in the honeymoon. I'm about to be 50, so I got to get her pregnant quick, so we going right away. Yeah. But also, have sex also not on the honeymoon. Yeah, of course. But why don't you- I think we want to, but I like-

Did she pull the goalie? Not yet. Well, what do we do? It takes a lot of time. You want to be married and then have kids. Right. No, she did, she Well, what do we do? If she wants to be married and then have kids. Right. No, she did. You want to be married and then have kids.

Yeah, that's what she wants. Okay, okay. Because I'm always trying to get her pregnant. But she wants to. We know, we know. Yeah, we know. Yeah, my pool game is whack. Wow.

So gross. You did. You make it gross. No matter what you make it gross. I feel sick. I feel sick. I feel bad for her. Whack pull out game. Oh, wow. I feel sick. I feel bad. Whack, pull out, gang.

Oh, wow. What else you got, Nick? That's it. That's it? Wow, that went fast. How long did we do? We did four hours. Oh, really?

We did four hours of anal talk. Yeah. We didn't do four hours of anal talk. All we're saying is when your chick's on her period. Disgusting. First of all, was your chick just like a gusher? Is she just like? Wow.

You know? Yeah, you made it gross. It's unbelievable, dude. You have a real after. You have a real after going too much. Wait, is it like, is she like Niagara Falls? Gross? Dude, here, hold on.

You have to know you take it the next level. I know. And it's not even what you're saying. It's not even what you're saying. It's how you do it. You know about sound effects bro we would be at the diner he'd be doing this shit over like a tuna sandwich it's so gross just fucking yeah you're gross bro yeah man. Too much. This episode's called Too Much. This is how we do it.

Wow, dude. All right. Anyways, where we at? I'm in Michigan this weekend. Speaking of Grand Rapids. Dude, anyway, dude, bags of shit and fucking gush out of your twat. I'll be in Michigan. I'll be in Grand Rapids.

Come check me out this weekend. Speaking of cold. Yeah, it's going to be cold as hell. But I get to bust out my Uggs and my big jacket. Oh, wow. That's it, huh? Just Uggs and a big jacket on stage? Yeah.

I got one of those New York rapper jackets. You know what I mean? That has the fur right here. Yeah, fuck yeah. Those are the best. Hell yeah. What do you got coming up? Actually, this comes out this week, right?

Thursday night, dude. Yeah, I'll be in Oxnard, California. Well, you're there next weekend, though. No, I'm here this weekend. That's this weekend? I'm on those shows this weekend? Yeah. Okay.

So you'll come? I'll be there. Yeah. I wanted to be there, but I'm- You had it all set up and ready. For some reason, I thought it was next weekend. No, next weekend is when we are doing- The Fight Companion.

Yes. Yep. And that's your show, so you should know that. I know, you're right. No. Next weekend is when we are doing. The Fight Companion. Yes. Yep. And that's your show, so you should know that. I know. You're right. When you're right, you're right. So that's Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. I'm doing Sunday.

You won't be there Sunday. Won't be there Sunday. Daddy doesn't work Sundays. I'm going to do it Sunday. Yep. Okay. So you're Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Oxnard, Levity Live. Levity Live.

And then also I'll be in San Diego the next two weeks. Just go to my website, chrisalea.com. Where in San Diego? I'm doing Laugh Factory. Ooh. Yeah, I've never done it. I didn't know they had it. Levity Live. And then also I'll be in San Diego the next two weeks. Just go to my website, chrisalea.com. Where in San Diego? I'm doing Laugh Factory. Ooh. Yeah, I've never done it. I didn't know they had it. It just opened.

It's awesome. It's got a low ceiling and shit. We've never been there, so. Yeah. And then Congratulations Podcast is my podcast. And then I think it's January 26th, Chin. I'm at the Improv Shopping Friends. Some of the friends in here will be there.

It's one show only, 8 p.m. again. just doing spots all around la for all of january and then february we have uh sacramento punchline and i think we have also wise guys salt lake city the week before i love that place yeah there you go that's it That's it, man. Love you guys. Thanks for tuning in. Thanks, guys. Thanks, guys. Outro Music You can't forget about Brendan, he's still me, everything thick, thick, thick Still got the B's in the trap, trapping Still the king in the sting, so quit asking If you know, then you know, it's a cat's thing Ball and chain, hair swang like the rat king King in the sting, back with the crew We got Stevie Weeby, Eric Griffin, Brendan, Theo too

Yeah, you know how we do it, so just tune in for the laughs. Theo said that he was on his way, but ran out of gas. King and the Sting. King and the Sting. King and the Sting. King and the stink.