The Golden Hour - Episode 17: Aliens vs Ethnicities

Episode Date: April 25, 2019

The boys talk Theo's bad hip and fondness for Dustin Poirier, Brendan's new 2 rivers 3 dudes nickname, Game of Thrones toiletries, Lil John's donated eye, cum pops and crawfish tapouts, advice for a girl banging her best friend's boyfriend, ravioli martial artists, air sky aliens, SMILFY aunts, bass fishing, the Rat King imposter and more!Postmates - Promo Code: KATS2019Robinhood - https://kingsting.robinhood.comHello Fresh - https://www.hellofresh.com/kats60Away -  https://www.awaytravel.com/kats Promo Code: katsLearn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

back off my broccolini get your life together don't touch me bro i'm not touching you dude dude you definitely bro no bro get away from me dude you look tired i do yeah that's how i look did you run here from new orleans no i didn't't run here. Oh, I thought you did. Dude, you're crazy, man. Have you ever been around yourself? Not a time. Dude, you should get a mirror that's real clear and fucking real awesome. You need to get better friends. What's going on?

Whoever dresses you in the morning, you need better friends. Yeah, I dressed myself. I set this out last night. No. Yeah. Dude, what were you doing in New Orleans? What are you? I was hanging out with family.

I saw Dustin Poirier, dude. Let me hold the strap. God, get off his nuts. I'm not holding his nuts. Oh, my God. Dustin, I apologize, man. He doesn't have any nuts, dude. He got his nuts taken out to him.

All of a sudden, he wins the belt. Oh, my God. We're from the same state. Oh, my God. We're from the same fucking country. God, dude. Same country. God, dude. Get off, bro. God, dude.

Get off his nuts. I apologize, Dustin. This guy, this guy, he's been fighting for 90 years. All of a sudden, you're on his dick hole. Dude, he fought Bill Clinton early in his career, bro. Dustin's fought everybody. And first of all, we are from the same country, bro. Yeah, I know. Dude, first of all, you're the guy who

dressed like one of the dudes that Michael Jackson molested, Wade Robson, today. Dude, no, I dress like I'm at Kanye West's gospel meetings on Sunday. When I walked in, I was like, ah, fuck. Bro, you look like Coach Ella, bro. Dude, you just... Bro, you look like

you coach a freaking, one of the weakest wrestling teams in Beverly Hills, huh, Coach Ella? Dude, you look like Billy Ray Cyrus' agent. Bro, I look like Billy Ray Cyrus' yard guy. You look like his landscape. Yeah, dude. Bro, you got to get a good look at yourself, man. Dude, you need better friends. You're just like, nah, that ain't it, dude. Bro, you got to get a good look at yourself, man. Dude, you need better friends. You're just like, nah, that ain't it, bro.

That ain't it, man. You can't dress like a character. Bro, dude, are you kidding? You look like a referee at Hot Topic, bro. That's how you're dressed right now. Bro, you look like the head referee, the line judge at Hot Topic, dude. Dude, you look like security for Toys R Us. I look like security for a yard sale.

You look horrible. You dress like the type of dude that roots for the fucking White Walkers. Game of Thrones reference. Game of Thrones. I'll go with that, dude. You have no idea what Game of Thrones is. Yeah, I do, man. I've been to Game of Thrones.

It's a place where they sell toilets, isn't it? Correct. Also formerly known as Spencer's. Yeah. Dude, I remember going to Spencer's and stealing a bunch of shit from there, dude. Who didn't steal from Spencer's? Who didn't, bro? And what about our idea that we still haven't made yet, lava lamps that have semen in them?

Oh, you're busting them. And you can ejaculate into the lamp and contribute to the beauty of your own environment. And I'm talking about praise God. It's kind of like a chia pet. Yeah. Full of cum. Well, you don't have to say cum, but you could say semen. You could say skeet.

You could say something less. Skeet? Yeah, you could say something. You think skeet's less harsh? Yeah, bro. Skeet? Then cum? What is that?

John? I'm sorry, what, did you up with? Little John as your teacher? Okay. Skeeve? First of all, I'm shocked to world right now. Can we get a picture up of Little John Winnie without his sunglasses? Oh, man. He is an ugly looking character.

He's not ugly, bro. He has a very unique style in his eyes. I would say that. Oh, does he have crazy eyes? Huh? Does he have the chameleon? No, he's just got that built-in crossing guard back behind his nose somewhere. Dude, he's that wild cat.

But you got to love him, man. It's Little John. And it just goes to show you, man, you got to trust. No, it's the one with the tuxedo. Go up, man. Look, it's a yearbook one right there. Oh, shit. That is not.

That ain't him. That's not him. That's Little John. No, it's not. Yeah, it is, bro. On the left. All them teachers. not. Yeah, it is, bro. On the left. All them teachers keep. Yeah.

He was getting an eye exam. That guy was like, okay, what's on that line? He's like, what? What? No, okay. Okay. One or two. Yeah.

Dude, and the problem is a lot of kids learn. That's how they answer on tests and stuff. It's very sad. It's a problem. But, dude, those are his eyes? Yeah, man. He can see from here. What were his eyes?

Well, one of his eyes was his, but it was a birth eye, and then the other one, I think, was donated at some point. Oh, that makes sense. Yeah, he got that, because he has one birth eye, I know that. And then he has one that came to him. How was New Orleans? Huh. How was New Orleans? Huh? How was New Orleans?

It was good, man. What did we do? Eating a lot of food. You just went down there for the holiday Easter? Went there for the Easter. Is your family religious? Yeah, we went to church. I mean, we had a little bit of religion.

You went to church? Oh, yeah. They let you in? Looking for the Lord, yeah. Oh, wow. Yeah. Did you just stay outside and put your ear to the door? No joke.

During the service, somebody was singing on the stage, you know? And they always have that drummer that's behind the plastic. Oh, no, yeah. Like, what is going on? He's behind the plastic walls. You ever see that? Like someone's going to try and assassinate him or some shit? Yeah, dude.

Like, what the fuck, bro? Take it easy. He's the president. He has that weird glass. Yeah, he has that weird glass. He's important, bro. The church drummer, though. It's too much, though. It's too much, though.

It's too much. Did you stand up and go, I don't like men's anymore! I don't like men's anymore! Sometimes that spirit gets you, man. It gets me. The spirit wild, man. The spirit wild. But no, he gave a buzz buzz out from the stage.

I think I'm the only one that caught the reference, you know? You're all found at the same place. We are in his arms. We are in his arms. Buzz buzz. Buzz buzz. Dude, how awkward is it when, I haven't been in church in forever, but I remember I was embarrassed.

Obviously, dude. I didn't know. You look like Satan's little fucking, you dress like Satan's little fucking crack pipe. Bro, you look like you went there and handed out Scientology books. You look like you're giving discounts on Scientology books. Dude, I look like a guy who knows how to bag leaves. You know what I'm saying, bro? Dude, but did you know any of the songs?

Did you know any of the songs? Oh, any of the songs um oh yeah i knew some of the songs do you really well they put the words up there in like 7 000 font oh you want the screen you want that fancy one it was yeah this church it's pretty it's pretty fancy it's right on the lsu campus i don't know what it's called oh well no i've never but we had fun dude the pastor named kevin he's real chill bro big kev touching kids and shit still no no no he has kids of his own so at that point i mean you could touch your own he's real chill, bro. Big Kev? Touching kids and shit still? No, no, no, no. He has kids of his own, so at that point. I mean, you could touch your own. He's not doing anything like that, though.

He's on the other side. You never know. Louisiana? Christian? What are you talking about, dude? They got it down pat, bro. That's what you guys do. Crawl dads. Football.

The last kids. That's Florida. That's Florida. Oh, dude. That's here. Dude, no, that's not here. It's not Cali. That's Hollywood.

No, Hollywood. What are you talking about? There's some guy across, no, that's not here. It's not Cali. That's Hollywood. No, Hollywood. What are you talking about? There's some guy across town probably having his son for lunch. Bro, this place, Hollywood's the shadiest, dude. A bunch of gay men's up there in the hills. Gay men's. Oh, and they're buying straight children off the internet and eating them. Writing movies and shit.

It's crazy out here. It's the dark arts. How was your boy Dustin Poirier the diamond looking? The diamond was doing good, bro. Actually, he was eating donuts, I will say that. He should be. I don't know if, you know, I don't know how that could affect his future. You know who's not eating donuts? Who?

Khabib. Oh, bro. First of all, they don't have donuts in Khabib's country, okay? They eat cement. You might be right. They eat quickcrete for breakfast. They fucking eat concrete. That's all he fucking They eat quickcrete for breakfast. They fucking eat concrete. That's all he fucking eats. Well, dude, they're probably over there using steroids, as we call them, brother.

The steroids? I mean, do you think they're using it over there? They're so hairy. Look how much. Khabib's not, but they're definitely, they're the ones that started it. His whole chin has turned into an armpit. Have you seen Khabib? I have.

Yeah, it's insane. Trouble. But, dude, he did let me pick up the strap before he did, and I fucking dropped it, bro. It's heavy, dude. It's heavy. Jesus. Now, which belt is better? The Find the Kid Guest of the Year or that belt?

Well, first of all, he actually said, bro, why didn't you bring your belt? And I said, because those fucking creeps haven't given it to me yet. Well, it's in the studio. You'll walk by every day. You could just stop in. Let me know when it's in. Well, it's in, bro. I got you months ago. Santino

got his award. Oh, did he? Yeah. Rookie of the Year. Looks like the goddamn Oscar. The Red Adam Ray. That's what they call that guy, dude. Get the fuck out of here, bro. That fucking Whiskey Ginger. That guy's an alcoholic, dude. That guy'll die in a drunk driving accident any day

now. Oh, man. Yeah, yeah, come by and get it. Should we start this? This motherfucker. Hey, we got King of the Sting merch dropping Friday! Friday, Friday, Friday. Only took six months, dude. Well, I had to hand make it, bro. I had to do it all myself.

What do you think I've been doing, man? I leave here, print shirts. That's a great question, actually. Really? That's awesome, man. Yeah, dude. You got jerseys. I've seen the jerseys. Don't Touch Me tees, and then regular King of the Sting tees. Well, look, send some of those Don't Touch Me tees down to Florida for children, dude, because a lot of pedophiles down there and also up here in East Hollywood Hills. Oh, and the website's kingthesting.com.

Yeah. Some mutant bought the King and the Sting. Really? Yeah. So we got kingthesting.com. What? Yeah, man. You mean King and the Sting. Really? Yeah. So we got kingthesting.com. What? Yeah, man. You mean king and the Sting?

Kingthesting.com. But why didn't someone get King and the Sting? Yeah, so I just told you. Some dude bought it way before us. Who? Some mutant. And we found where he's at. He's in Australia.

Nuh-uh. Yeah. And he won't give it up? Won't give it up. And then when you click on it, it goes to other comics websites. No way. KingTheSting.com KingTheSting.com

Unbelievable. Not surprised that you fucking left a word out of a sentence, bro. Tell you what, bro. Unbelievable, Brendan. Alright, let's get into this shit, dude, because I can barely even stand being here. You didn't even bring me a coffee. This one had to make one. How about we pour that cream in the refrigerator? Get into this shit, dude, because I can barely even stand being here. You didn't even bring me a coffee. This one had to make one. You had to make coffee, bro.

How about when you poured that cream in the refrigerator? This fuck used pea cream. Like the vegetable pea, and it was all clumpy. It makes me sick. It was so gross, dude. Imagine you're ready to see. Bro, quit creaming things. First of all, these motherfuckers out here in Hollywood, bro.

Just use the nut milk, bro. Bro, if you- You want me to nut in your milk? No, I don't. But at some point, it's a lot of these pedophiles out here. If you want to fucking drink something out of a child, drink it out of a fucking child. Quit getting all these young fucking vegetables. It says on there, like, young eggplant milk.

And you're like, what the fuck is going on, bro? Dude, you ever had Parmesan cheese milk? It's too much. It's fucking too much. But dude, I turned the pea milk over and a huge clump of something came off the edge. It was so disturbing.

Two inches round, bro. I mean a straight nut, bro. It looked like a damn nut off of a damn maybe a dolphin or something. We're going to start it off with debate club today. We got Derek in here today, Derek Poston. We got Derek, we got Kat. Dude, we're...

It's true. We love everybody, you know? We love everybody. And they actually have a very similar skin tone, Derek and Kat. Oh, wow. You think? I don't. A little bit.

Oh, I don't. Wow. I think it's beautiful, yeah. Thank you, Theo. Yeah, you're welcome, brother. Appreciate it. Well, we're going to start with- You're welcome, man.

I'm fresh from church, so. Yeah, you seem nicer. I do. I got the feeling in me, dude. Hey, Seuss. You got that Hey, Seuss drip. Thanks, Wade Robson, dude, that obviously got molested by Michael Jackson and then did a bunch of-

And then sued him. Yeah, did a bunch of steroids to try to act like he didn't. Bro, you look like Wade Robson in Carrot Top had a fucking kid, bro. You are jacked, bro. Dude, you look like Billy Ray Cyrus and fucking Amanda Bynes had a child. Oh, whatever, dude. Just fat shit crazy with a fucking mullet. Bro, let's be honest, though.

And this may be a cry for help, or I don't know how you cry for help at someone who may need it, but let's just admit that Pete Davidson is turning into the tall Amanda Bynes. Can we do that? I like Pete. I don't want to end on this. Wait, I like Pete, too. I like Pete. Let's also not discredit the fact that someone could be having mental health issues.

He might. I don't want to be the person that doesn't reach out to somebody. I'm serious, man. I reach out to him. And what'd he say? Nothing. Yeah, okay. There you go. So, yeah, you guys are fucking tight, right? I'm not person that doesn't reach out to somebody. I'm serious, man. I reach out to them. And what do you say? Nothing. Yeah. Okay.

There you go. So yeah, you guys are fucking tight, right? I'm not your guru. I'm not your guru. Yeah. Yeah. I'm not taking life advice from Theo. Lindsay Lohan did.

Look how she turned out. First of all, I did slip a note under her door. We stayed in the same hotel like 13 years ago. Oh, you're trying to fuck. Oh, yeah. Dude. I'm like, hey, I'm a nice guy. Don't fucking touch me. 13 years ago, she was you're trying to fuck. Oh, yeah. Dude. And I was like, hey, I'm a nice guy. 13 years ago? Don't fucking touch me.

13 years ago, bro, she was banging before she got all crazy and skinny. Yeah, okay. She had them big tits. And right now, Pete Davidson's banging, bro. You know what I'm saying? He's tall. Kate Beckinsale, bro. Yeah, bro.

Kate Beckinsale's banged all of our young friends, first of all. Well, yeah, cool. There's no problem with it. I agree. I like her. Oh, I think that she's hot. I also think she's collecting children, bro. I'm just saying he's turning into the tall Amanda Bynes.

When is it in? Well, Amanda Bynes got her shit together. Right. Grew her hair back out. She's at Art Institute. Took 11 years. Took 11 years. Had to get out of the business.

Took 11 years, man. I mean, look, I love Pete Davidson, but I just wonder, is he still doing comedy at this point, or what is he doing? He does. He's doing movies now with Judd Apatow. Well. And I would know because I just auditioned for him. Is he still doing comedy, though, is what I want to know. He does stand-up.

You know, I'm not talking about civil rights with Judd Apatow, okay? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm talking about comedy. Anyway, I just hope that Pete's okay. I want to let him know that I do wonder if he's okay or not because a lot of it seems like a cry for help for me somehow. Agree. You know? He was dyeing his hair different colors for a while.

Remember that? He was Ariana Grande's mood ring. You know what I'm saying? You could tell how she was feeling based on his hair color. It's true. And they broke up. Yeah. And then what?

Now he's dating a woman, a senior citizen almost. She's bad, though. She's bad, though. I agree. But a pre-senior citizen. You trying to start a beef with Peteior citizen? You trying to start a beef with Pete? Huh? You trying to start a beef with Pete? I don't have any Pete beef. Comedy beef!

Comedy beef! I don't have any Pete. I love Pete. I'm just saying I am... Concerned? Concerned about him, yeah. I'm concerned about his bank account because he's killing it. Yeah, that's fine. That's fine, bro. He'll be able to afford a very nice funeral if he doesn't take care of himself. That's what I'm saying.

It's just, bro, it's scary, and it looks like he's getting into a scary place. Maybe he's not. You know, they caught him. He was sitting on the top of a fucking scaffolding at a fucking Nine Inch Nails concert. Maybe he's doing fine. Okay? Maybe he's doing okay. That's a cry for help for me, man.

That's what I'm saying. Dude, Brendan's at a fucking train concert hanging on top of the bleachers. You know it's about time for me to go. Wearing a Goo Goo Dolls shirt. Brendan went to Aerosmith concert the other day, man. You should work. You went to Aerosmith concert, bro.

I did, you idiot. Yeah. Fucking Nick shows up with an Aerosmith concert shirt on. It's like fucking 1987. It's premature Nick, bro. It's his only shirt, dude. The guy goes,

shirt a month. Well, I'm glad you took care of him. Yeah. Oh, dude, I clothe my guys. Unlike Chin, who's in here wearing some fucking concentration camp boots. Dude, Chin's balling. Chin came in here with a fucking gold pinky ring. It's a new boot. It's like, what the fuck? He really did, bro.

Looks like Raiden from Mortal Kombat. He's got a rap video. Oh, he's definitely got that Shawshank Redemption lift kit. That's what he's in, bro. He's got those new patent leather shoes. A pinky ring. He's fucking got the Warden's music tattooed on his back. Alright, let's get into this shit. I can't talk to you anymore. Let's fucking do it, bro.

Jesus Christ. I shouldn't even got out of my Uber. Me neither. I shouldn't have fucking came. First one from Jesse J. Rom Romano from Upstate New York for Debate Club. Upstate. What's up, Brandon? What's up, Theo? Damn, Doug. What's up, Darren? What's up, boy? Damn, Doug. What's up, Dan? What's up, boy?

Jesse from New York. Don't mind the shower. Just got off of work. Okay. I got a Debate Club topic for you. All right. Cartoon-wise, who's hotter? April O'Neil from Ninja Turtles or Rogue from X-Men?

Let me know. Buzz, buzz. Gang, gang. Buzz, buzz, man. Gangsta, get clean, bro. And sweet fucking tattoo of the Darth Vader. I respect that, man. That guy looks clean.

I respect a clean young man up there in upstate New York. Hard to stay clean up there, dude. They don't have a lot of soap up there. A little shout out to everybody in recovery. But what I'm saying is this, man. What was he asking about? April O'Neil from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles or Jean Grey, which is Rogue. Now, April had some titties,

but fucking Rogue, that body was banging, bro. Jean Grey? Bro. Here's the thing about April O'Neil. She just owned five turtles. She was a slave owner. Also, she never let none of them fuck ever. Mike Angelo was always trying to fuck.

No, Michael Angelo was constantly trying to fuck. She always blue balled those boys. And by boys, I mean five grown turtles. First of all, April O'Neil all day, dude, that thing is a one piece that she's wearing,

bro. That shit is hot. And she always just had that camera. She was always ready to shoot her own porn at the house, bro, or low key van porn. She was in a van by herself with a camera, dude.

Just looking to fuck. Like taxi driver. An executive producer for Bang Bus. She was in a van by herself with a camera, dude. Just looking to fuck. Like a taxi driver. She was basically an executive producer for Bang Bus. She was way before her time, dude. Dude, you're... April O'Neil, beautiful, hard worker, obviously had a degree. Who's this other human trap house that you got over here flying around the air? You talking about Jean Grey?

What's the other one's name? Jean Grey, bro. Also known as Rogue. She looks like... Are they not the same character? No. Jean Grey and Rogue are two different characters? Yeah.

Don't touch my buzzer. Well, I grew up different. My dad told me they were the same. So definitely April. Because you're dead, Michael Jackson, dude. You're wearing the Neverland Ranch fucking workout kit, bro. Fucking look horrible, dude. Here's the thing.

So Rogue and Gene Gray aren't the same person? No. Bro, it looks like you've definitely been with April O'Neil. Like you've been going to the gym with Tevin Campbell, dude.

You gotta fucking tighten up, man. Dude, you just need to get in a gym. I will buy you a gym membership. I'm trying to. My hips are hurting

a lot recently, you creep. From what? I have dysplasia, you idiot. From what, bro? From collecting ham, you idiot. From what, bro? From collecting hamsters? What? The fuck, bro?

Dude, I did a lot of ground and pound when I was young, man. You didn't do shit. Growing up. In the mean streets of, without streets, there were dirt roads, you idiot. The mean dirt roads. The mean dirt roads. First of all, who's this other frickin'? That's Rogue, bro.

Fuck Rogue. You know what, Rogue? You know, she thought she was all fancy with other mutants and shit for the X-Men. Fuck the X-Men. I'm fucking April O'Neil all day. I agree with you. She's down with the van to fuck. She owned five turtles.

Slave owner, but whatever. Rogue, it's not slavery, dude, if they're reptiles. They're not, you know. That's not true. They did have personalities, and they did love pizza. Well, they fought for a fucking, they fought for pizza. They fought for a rat for pizza. They fought a rat, and the... They fought for pizza. They fought for a rat for pizza. They fought a rat,

and the rat paid them in pizza. That'd be a slave owner. They're lucky anybody gave a fuck about them, dude. They're turtles fighting for a rat. Dude, ninja turtles? They were turtles? That new fucking ninjitsu? Okay, it's easy to learn.

Oh, wow. Ninjitsu. First of all, being an actual ninja. I'll say inspired you. You're the rat king from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Oh, no. That's not where I'm from. Bring up the rat king, Derek, for me.

Bring him up. That's where this all originated from. That's where the rat king came from. I know where I came from, you creep. You're just missing the eye patch, bro. Jesus Christ. I can't even believe someone let you get a GED. Dude, that's Splinter, and he's hard as fuck in the face.

Yeah, that's Splinter. So Derek's fucking about to in the pit. Yeah, that's Splinter, so Derek's fucking about to get laid off. What I'm saying is this, bro. Did you type in Rat King? Oh, no, Rat King. He typed in Rat Ninja Turtles. Of course you get Splinter, bro. That's a Rat King right there. It's a group of rats that band together to survive. That's exactly what it is. But let me get into this

other person. Rogue or whatever this lady's name, Trap House fucking Rhonda, whatever this lady's name is house fucking uh ronda whatever she's a thought bro she's a an afterthought for me dude she looks like an ig model she looks like carrot top with fucking freezer burn bro this bitch looks uh she looks crusted out dude and what she is what is she wearing is that an outfit is that paint april's old school she's classy bro she has a job she goes back to her apartment. This other bitch is fucking probably, looks like she sleeps in the freezer section at Ralph's, bro.

Bro, but she also looks like, remember, she lives in a fucking, the X-Men house with Professor X doing God knows what. That's true. And there's six other dudes around all the time. You don't think she's getting a fucking train ran on her by the other mutants? Oh, don't think like that. You don't think Beast was fucking doing work? Don't think like that, dude. Then you don't know the X-Men, bro. You think you hang around with a guy named the Beast and Wolverine

and no one's getting dicked down in that house? Yeah, dude! And the turtles were respectful, you know? They had their shit together. They lived by the samurai. So I'm gonna go with April O'Neil. I'm going with April O'Neil. First of all, it's easy to be a ninja these days.

You don't even, is there any real training? You just have to wear a costume, hide underground. The one guy had size, those little things. That's not even a fucking weapon, dude.

That's Morse code. What is that for even? If we were turtles, you'd be Michelangelo. You know that, yeah? Yeah, that's the one with the stick, isn't it? Nah, Michelangelo

is the one, the orange one. What were his weapons? Oh, nunchucks. Nunchucks are dangerous. I'd be Donatello. Not a big deal. Yeah, I'm a purple guy.

You'll figure it out. I'd be Donatello because I'm a fucking dime boy. Bebop and Rocksteady. April it is, bro. April it up, baby. 62% of people say Rogue. Wow. Get your fucking life.

I've never trusted our fan base. The next one is from Kelly Crosby and Baby Campbell from Arizona. Wow. Get your fucking life. I've never trusted our fan base. Disturbing. Kelly Crosby and Baby Campbell from Arizona. Oh, Baby got front, too. Look at them tots, huh? Hey, guys. Debate club question. What is scarier?

Ghosts or aliens? Gang, gang. Buzz, buzz. Oh, my God. Is that fucking... He's cute, man. He is cute. I thought that was Brian Callen.

I thought that was Brian Callen. She has something on her back. It's a beautiful young man. What is she wondering? What's scarier, ghosts or aliens? Ghosts or aliens? Fucking aliens. This is an easy one.

Yeah, dude. Ghost. What's the worst they can do? I don't know. Fuck with my lights. Might pull my sheets back. Okay, cool, man. Somebody told me once in a dream that aliens are going to come here and fight black people.

Is that crazy or what? Did a white person tell you that? No, I don't remember who it was. And by aliens, do you mean other white people? Well, that there's a low-key beef between aliens and black people. That we don't know about. They're called Mexicans. What? Yeah, bro.

I don't think so, dude. Who told you this? No, Maurice Claret told me the most dangerous people in prison are Mexicans. That they are the most dangerous people. Yeah. Now it's coming from a black guy, so. No, somebody told me there's beef between black people and aliens, dude. I'm not a black person. I'm not an insider

trading here. I don't know. So let's go to our ethnic friends that are here right now. Are you assuming cats or Derek are scared of aliens because they're black? I don't know if anyone's scared of them. I'm saying, is there a low-key beef between ethnicities that

aren't white? I'm white. I don't know. We have beef against certain things. What don't we like? What do white people have beef against? I would say probably money, taxes, water, slow internet. I don't know what current white beefs are. No, a lot of white

people like them, I don't think. None of the whites I hang out with. That's true. Me neither. What do you think, Derek? Are you scared of aliens? I just want to know, Theo, did you get that information from the movie Independence Day? I don't know. Did you see Will Smith punch an alien and you were like, oh, there's beef between these people?

Will Smith does hate aliens and he's kind of the leader. I don't remember what I was watching, but I fell asleep and had a dream that, and then it started to resonate with me that there is a low-key thing going on between black people and aliens. And I wouldn't know about it, and you wouldn't know about it. I think when you refer to aliens, you mean Mexicans. I think that's what's going on. No, I'm talking about air aliens, dude. Illegal aliens.

I'm talking about air aliens. Oh, you're talking about like Area 50? Sky aliens, yeah. You know what I'm saying? So, Derek? You ever heard of this so-called beef? I mean, no, Theo. I'm saying? So, Derek? You ever heard of this so-called beef? I mean, no, Theo. Okay.

I'm not accusing anybody. Just one black guy, though, said it. So that's where he gets his input. Well, I'll tell you this, dude. The first time black people have a lot of early information because first time I learned about Flat Earth, I was at a pizza place, a late night pizza fucking spot at a casino. Oh, yeah, he told me this. And two black dudes said, hey, man, we got to talk to you, right? And I thought, you know, shit was about to go down, you know?

Like they were going to run a train on you? No. Oh, you thought they were going to beat you up? I didn't know. I wasn't sure. I thought we were going to do that or gamble together. Talk about fucking racial profiling. Oh, dude, it was.

Just because two black guys are like, hey, can we talk? You're like, oh, my God, don't hit me there. Well, no, dude. We'll talk about flat earth. Well, that's what they did. They sat me down in the pizza parlor, which is irony

because you're in a pizza parlor, right? And so the pizza, that whole setup, and they said, look, man, look at this pizza. What do you think about it?

And I was like, they said, is it round? And I said, I mean, it's round, but really it's flat. And then these two dudes explained to me flat earth, and I'd never heard it before. And then years later, flat earth comes to be this big thing.

You know, they're doing all the flat everything. Yeah, big thing for dummies, but yeah, I guess it's a big thing. Big thing for thinkers, I think. But now to hear that black people and aliens are against each other? Again, I don't know if that's real. That's what I'm trying to think. I think those might be the same flat earthers. I'm not hiding it from you, Theo.

I don't know where you got that from. Okay, I believe you. There might be some truth there, though. I think you're a little confused. And are you hearing anything on your front, Kat? About aliens and black people? Just aliens. What about Asians and aliens?

Yeah. Oh, Asians hate other Asians. I know that. Okay, well. Well, I'm glad we got that out of the way. Well, damn, dude. Yeah, wow. They can't stand other Asians.

Wow. You know what's crazy, though? Is you never hear Asians with conspiracy theories or aliens. They don't give a fuck. They have ghost stories. Oh, really? You have that ghost forest or whatever the fuck.

Where like... You mean the suicide forest? Yes. There's ghosts there. Sure. Yeah. Well, that's Logan Paul did that. Yeah, I know.

And I think, yeah, he killed his brother over there or something. What happened? They stumbled upon a dead brother. He took a video. He took a video in the forest. Oh, yeah. Well, look, man. I think...

Asians don't fuck with the conspiracy theories and like flat earth shit. They're too busy making shit. What do you mean making shit, dude? What do you mean, dude? What do you mean? You're the one wearing all the shit they're making. I know. So are you.

This is made in America, you idiot. No, it's not. It is Tulsa. No, it's not. I'm way more scared of aliens. Fuck a ghost. What's the worst thing a ghost can do to you? Ghosts can haunt you.

Ghosts can possess your grandmother. Cool. Ghosts can. Give her some energy. Ghosts can possess your grandmother. Cool. Give her some energy. Ghosts can live at your grandparents' house forever. Yeah. They just haunt old people. I'm amazed we haven't seen as many ghosts recently as there were.

In LA, there's no ghosts. I definitely need to see that. At the comedy store? Go to the belly room, turn the lights off. Shit's definitely haunting. That's a guy feeling on you, dude. Is it? Is it the same guy every time? Motherfucker.

Damn. I thought it was a ghost. I thought it was a gay ghost. But yeah, I'll go aliens because they're like the bigger ghost. They're like ghost daddy. And we don't know what they're doing. They're out there. They might come by.

They might not. But dude, I'll tell you this. I'd watch a group of aliens and a group of brothers fucking throw down any day of the week. Yeah, you keep going back to aliens versus black guys. Because I heard early in- Maybe it'd be a fun video game, but- I heard early information. Aliens versus black guys, the video game?

Yeah, I'd play that. Dude. Good. Don't touch me. Dude, that's a good video game, dude. You hit me right in one of my carpals. Sorry, dude. Talk to Poirier about it.

51% of people said aliens. Fuck that. Hey, ghost, what are they going to do? Our next one. But if you hear anything, Derek, let us know. You know I got you, bud. Yeah, keep us on that front. Just text me.

Next one comes from Cody from Anaheim. Oh, shit. Powerful hair, Cody. Gang, gang, buzz, buzz. It's your boy, Cody, coming at you from Dallas, Texas. What's up, Cody? Sitting around waiting for Brendan to bring that big

dick energy tour. Yeah, throw the energy in there, bro. Announce that date. In the meantime, I have a debate club question for you guys. If time travel existed, would you rather go back in time to experience a historic event of the past or maybe change something or

go forward in time and see what the future is all about. Love you guys. Gang, gang. Buzz, buzz. Buzz, buzz, brother. Proudful here. Now, here's the thing. I don't want to jump to conclusions here, but Derek, being a black man,

I assume you don't want to ever go back. Yeah. You always want to go forward. Forward. Yeah. It's bad. In like 1985. Yeah.

Only white people want to go back. Yeah. That's a good point, actually. Black people want more forward progress. Yeah. Black people always want to go to the future. white people want to go back. Yeah. That's a good point, actually. When you think about it. Black people are more forward progress, yeah. Black people always want to go to the future. White people want to go back and bet on Muhammad Ali fights and fucking football games and make money.

You know what I'm saying? Yeah. Talk about the money. Or taste dessert for the first time. Yeah. That's what I'd go back to. Or invent the iPhone or some shit. Yeah.

First time I ever had dessert, bro. I remember having dinner and I'd be like, oh, it was so good. And then somebody's like, oh, dinner was good? What about this motherfucker? Overtime, bitch. Yeah. Overtime. What'd they give you, a Twinkie when you were a kid or something?

Banana pie, bro. Ooh, a nice custard. Ugh. A nice banana custard. So fucking good, dude. Definitely, I don't want to go to the future. I'd rather go back in time. Yeah, but are you going to know what you know now?

Because I have a lot of dreams where I go back in time and undercover boss on plantations and stuff like that. And I'll have to make sure everybody's keeping in line with what's going on. Oh, you're a slave owner. Not a slave owner. I'm an actual employee. Oh, incredible. But I'm undercover boss. Oh, word.

Yeah. And you're hearing the concerns of the employees and shit? Yeah, concerns of undercover boss. Oh, word. Yeah. And you're like hearing the, the concerns of the, of the employees. Concerns of the employees, see what's going on, new music, that kind of thing.

Just kind of ear to the grindstone, you know? But, so I would say, I would go back in time if I can know stuff from the future. The future looks fucking sad, bro.

It looks pretty sad. It's a lot of people coming and stuff at their house and mailing it off to other people, it seems like. It's a lot of people coming at their house on robots. Yeah. There's a lot of people coming and stuff at their house and mailing it off to other people, it seems like. It's a lot of people coming at their house on robots. There's a lot of robot fucking going on. A lot of flat earthers.

Imagine coming on something and then there's no batteries in it or something. So you empty it out? Yeah. You know how sad that is, cleaning up your fucking cum dumpster of a robot? Bro, can you not say terms like that? Sorry, dude. Oh, dude, what if your sex robot had the lava lamp in it? Oh, yeah.

So you're busting. You don't clean it up. It's a lava. You take out the lava lamp. Yeah, you take out that lava lamp and just put it in your living room. Put a little color in there. Boom. Dude, that's what I'm talking about.

Mom walks in her house. She goes, you have 17 lava lamps. That's really cool. I'm talking about that bus orb. I'm talking about that bus orb that we're going she goes, you have 17 lava lamps. That's really cool. I'm talking about that bust orb. I'm talking about that bust orb that we're going to create, bro. Why don't we make a bust orb? We should. And let's market them and sell it.

It would be great to have a magic. Because here's the thing. You're busting nuts anyways. Yeah. What are you doing with it? You're busting all these stupid nuts, you idiot. You're wasting on wiping up with socks and fucking in your sheets. Coming and napping.

Coming and napping. Tighten up. Do something with it. Tighten up. Do something with it. Tighten up. Yeah, imagine if you had a teamwork lamp in the lobby of your fucking apartment. Decorate your crib. Everybody's busted out in there, bro.

Think if you and your buddies just bust in the same lamp. Yeah. It's a team project. I love it. A bus lamp? Yeah, dude. Get you a bus lamp. 1999.

King of the steam. Bus lamp. And I guess it comes with the fluid And then when you bust It just stays in there It stays in there But then you gotta heat it up So those puppies start working

Oh it'll work man It'll work 50% It's 50 It's past and future 50-50 For what aliens and what? For past and future

Oh past and future Wow so I guess we're happy Where we are Right here in the middle Yeah man That's pretty good You're right People are happy This next one is from Bruno From Toronto Oh, past and future. Wow. So I guess we're happy where we are, right here in the middle. Yeah, man. That's pretty good. You're right.

People are happy. This next one is from Bruno from Toronto. Oh, another guy from Toronto. Come on, fucking. What's going on? Theo and Brennan. I got a debate club for you. Game of Thrones or Avengers? Gang, gang.

Buzz, buzz. Thanks so much. Love the show. Peace. This guy definitely looks, he has a NASA shirt on And he looks like an actual astronaut If you had somebody that was an astronaut I'd buy it There's no way he doesn't play an astronaut

Or an astronaut's young buddy That's kind of like low-key shadowing him In every movie He looks like a NASA intern No, he looks like more than an intern You think? He looks too young to be a But he looks like a NASA intern. No, he looks like more than an intern. You think? Yeah, intern. He looks too young to be a... But he looks like he has a shot at going into space.

Yeah, I agree, dude. He looks like he has a chance. Game of Thrones or Avengers? Listen, man, I don't fuck with Avengers. I fucks with Game of Thrones. You do? Oh, I'm balls deep in the Game of Thrones. You ever seen a White Walker, Theo?

Uh-uh. You ever seen a fucking dragon? You ever heard Clay Walker do the fucking musician? Nope. Don't give a fuck. Really good. You ever seen Khaleesi? Her hair is long.

No. 64. She was born in Baton Rouge. I don't know that song, bro. You probably don't see either, huh? Khaleesi? Khaleesi. I hit on Khaleesi before that show was big.

You a scumbag. I hit on her appropriately. At first it was Lindsay Lohan, now it's the Queen of the Dragons. Dude, I put a note under Lindsay Lohan's door that said if she was up late and bored that I was next door. You know how creepy that is? Hey, I'm next door. If you're up late and bored, I'm wide awake next door staring into your window. With your haircut?

You know how weird that is? And you're probably in a robe. I wasn't in a robe, bro. I was in a nice hotel room. We were on spring break. What are you doing next to Lindsay Lohan? She was like 17 then. No, she was not 17.

Yeah, she was, bro. We were both adults. She was young as fuck. No, I even remember looking at the IMDB of Parent Trap to make sure that we were both of age. Yeah. What are we saying? What are we even talking about? Avengers or Game of Thrones?

Avengers or Game of Thrones. Sorry, I need a nap. Game, I don't watch either one of them. I'll tell you this. What is good, though, is Just the Ten of Us reruns. Can you bring up a picture of that? Just the Ten of Us? Yeah.

What's that all? Talk about one man and fucking nine hotties living in an apartment together. You could not make this TV show today. 1987? Yeah, can we zoom in on that? Or are we just going to guess what everybody looks like? I believe more in dragons than I do this bald dude having all these chicks. Hot chicks, too, bro.

Yeah, it's up for debate. Well, that's a dude on the left there. No, that one is underage on the far bottom. For now, it's a dude, bro. Anything can happen. Yeah, you're right. 1987, though, you got to stay a dude. Bro, when you have 10 kids, you could fucking lose a dude, bro. Anything can happen. Yeah, you're right. 1987, though, you gotta stay a dude. Bro, when you have 10 kids, you could fucking lose

a kid, bro, at the mall, dude. Yeah, he doesn't care. Who gives a fuck, boy? Nine more, bro. Nine more. It's gonna be a thicker Christmas for the rest of us if we lose one, bro. Yeah, more sheets. So, gang, that's a great show if you get to find those reruns. But otherwise, it's up to you. Game of Thrones or Avengers?

Game of Thrones all day. I don't fucks with Avengers. I don't watch all with Avengers. Yeah. I don't watch all that kind of stuff, man. But if I'm going to, I'd rather see somebody get hit. Do you watch anything? Do you like watch Netflix or anything? I watch Dateline, really. I guess Dateline.

What else do you do? I love missing people and I love, they had a show called Disappear, but they couldn't find anybody else that was missing, which is ironic. You like crime drama, like First 48? You look like the type of dude that jacks off to law and order. Oh, is that what I look like, dude? No, I don't. What else we got?

It was 51% of people said Game of Thrones. Fuck, come on. Biggest show of all time. Yeah. Is it really? Yeah, not even close. That's just because Breaking Bad gave up. Breaking Bad was weak.

You know? Bro, they shot an infant out there. I don't know. Breaking Bad, teachers selling drugs. All right, I'm out. Yeah. All right, next up, Rip My Drip. Let's see it.

Our first one is Dalton Stice from Jacksonville, Illinois. Gang, gang, brother. Wow. Oh, shit. Look at this little. Look at this little old school. Look at this little. Look at this little old school. Look at this little cum pop. Dude, he looks like he's doing a reenactment for the Civil War and was the guy in charge of sucking the boys off.

He looks like straight up swilly wonka. Like he'll take a swill off your rod, bro. I like that gold hat. Me too, dude. He looks like a Tim Burton character that got cut. Yeah, he looks like Cum Burton. He looks like somebody that's- He looks like Billy Burton.

Yeah. He looks like somebody that drove over to Tim Burton's house to bust a nut in the driveway. And murder him. Yeah. Dude, is that a pocket watch? Hell yeah, dude. That shit is sick. Look at the jewelry.

Look at the jewelry. Zoom in on that jewelry, brother. Oh, cool. Unless you're Criss Angel, take it off. No, that's a turquoise, bro. He made that turquoise choice, dude, and that's when you get all dabbed up. Dude, I'm assuming that's sweat there. My mother wears turquoise, dude.

Yeah, my grandma used to wear that turquoise. Oh, it's the jewelry of people that smoke Marlboros. Dude, what's the name tag say? He worked at some sort of museum or some shit, because this is old school shit. That's George Washington's pocket watch. He has a name tag. Oh, he's at the Main Street, what is it, Brewing Co.? Zoom in on it again.

He looks like he has some swag, though, with the jewelry. Main Street Trading Co. Yeah, oh, he works at a pawn shop, bro. That's what's going on here. He works at a pawn shop, so he's's what's going on he works at a pawn shop so he's wearing something civil war pawn shop I respect that

yeah hell yeah the hat is fire bro dude I don't get why you don't wear something like that the hat looks heavy to me my neck is very I have a lot of cerebral issues Abe Lincoln figured it out bro

in my spine Abe Lincoln figured look at the boots yeah and it looks like he's at a Hampton Inn too which I love those boots look racist dude bury me in a Hampton Inn when too, which I love. Those boots look racist.

Dude, bury me in a Hampton Inn when I die, brother. You know what I'm saying? Wrap me up in that deluxe suite. Dude, I like this guy. I like this guy, too. What's his name? Daniel? Dalton.

Dalton. Powerful Dalton. Dalton, you could be a race car driver, man, or a guy that delivers milk real fast to people. You think? Oh, yeah. He'd be the fastest milkman this side of East St. Louis. It looks like he delivers lasagna. And I dig it. I could see that.

No one's doing that. You know what I'm saying? Oh, I could see. He's that fucking... He's that ravioli martial artist, bro. Like, he'll kick a fucking bolognese right down your fucking throat, you little pussy.

Toss on some crazy bread on that bitch ass. You're aggressive today, bro. I am, man. You start off with Jesus, with the Jesus vibe, and now you turn to... What else you got? Shout out to this Dalton. Yeah, I'm struggling.

Up next, we got Tim Welch from Phoenix, Arizona. Tim Welch. Oh, my God. Look at them fucking jorts, bro. He kind of has that Joe Rogan of the West vibe, huh? Dude, he has that Joe Rogan of the future vibe, doesn't he? Yeah. Look at those fucking bolets.

It looks like Joe Rogan, if he was in that movie, what's that movie where there's things climbing underground and they try to pop out and see you? Tremors. Tremors, yeah. That's an old movie. He looks like Joe Rogan if he's in Taxi Cab Confessions porno. Yeah, he looks like Joe Rogan and Hulk. He looks like Hulk Her-Rogan. That's what he looks like, dude.

Dude, look at his kicks. Remember when Hulk Hogan's son killed somebody with a car? Yeah, racism. That's crazy, man. You talking about Nick Hogan? Yeah, racism. He's an Uber driver now. Let's see.

What else do we got? Look at the fucking powerful fanny pack. Yeah, it's very powerful. And look at the front leg on him. Look at the front leg muscle. You talking about the teardrop, the quad teardrop?

You know what? That's a fellow Peloton rider. Is it? That's what I think. Look at the ass on him. You can't see it, but you can guess what it looks like.

You can guess. He got a peach bottom out the back. Oh, man, dude. That peach cobbler, bro. That soft area between his ass cheeks. Yeah. Oh, wow.

He might have that fucking rat tail hanging out the back, though. Oh, definitely. Not a mullet, but a rat tail, yeah. Oh, I could see that. Let's zoom in on this guy, too. He's got a bunch of tattoos. He might also be into homoeroticism. No, he fucks.

You don't take a picture like this with confidence without fucking. I don't know. I could see somebody taking this and not fucking also. Oh, see, I disagree. Got the fat cock in the front. He has a Ninja Turtle shirt on.

This guy's trying too hard for me. You think? Is that Alexi Lalas? Look at his face. Or is he trying? That is Alexi Lalas. Never mind. So that kind of says it all.

Remember Alexi Lalas? He has cauliflower too. Does he? This guy fucks, dude. Alexi Lalas. Never mind. So that kind of says it all. Remember Alexi Lalas? He has cauliflower, too. Does he? This guy fucks, dude. Guarantee it. Zoom in. Power fucks. Is that this kid fucking Stan?

No, it's not him. Are you talking about the guy who wrote Eminem? That's not cauliflower. It's just a pixelated photo, you delinquent. You don't wear shades like that and shorts like that if you can't choke someone unconscious. I fucks with this dude. Bet you he has his black belt, too, and fucking snap your neck. Yeah.

Like those little crawfish you snapped over the weekend. Oh, dude. I put one of them. One of them tapped out, dude. I bet. Just like give up. Just suck the heads, eat the tails, bro. Yeah.

I can't look at this man anymore. I mean, he looks like a nice man, but I'm tired of looking at him right now. Power move, though. Up next, we got James Dawson from Northamptonshire, England. Okay, Dirty James. Oh, hell yeah, bro. This is me. This is me right here.

What you mean? I'm just saying, if I were in England, this would be me. Do this kind of person live in England? I don't think so, man. He's a little more beefier than you, a little more manly. Really? He looks like Sabretooth, like a young Sabretooth from the X-Men movies. Dude, you look like Billy Elliot, bro, started a fucking anytime fitness outside of Liverpool.

Huh? Who's Billy Elliot? Bring up a picture of Billy Elliot real quick, if you don't mind. Derek's really great on the computer, isn't he? I've never owned a computer in my life, so thank you. Let's give Billy Elliot an image of him. Billy Elliot is kind of like the Christopher Columbus of Wales. This kid?

Yeah. I'm not a poof dog. I'm not a poof dog. I'm not a poof. I expect that a guy listens to Yellow Wolf. Yellow Wolf, one of the top probably 11 rappers of all time dude I expect that out of you homeschool, flat earther, that's fine

70 out of 72 tow truck drivers listen to fucking Yellow Wolf songs you better get your mind up you better mind up I'm just saying you look like Billy Elliot Billy Elliot opened up a smoothie shop outside of fucking Manchester.

Dude, this guy looks like the muscle for some fucking hooligan soccer club. This looks like Michael Bisping at a young age, doesn't it, though, in a way? A little bit. This guy looks like he doesn't take any shit. He didn't want to take this picture. He looked like he bullied the guy who took the picture. Look at him. This guy looks like he beats ass, right?

Yeah, dude, he does. He drinks tea and beats ass. That's what he does. Dude, he definitely does, man. It looks like he'll have a little spot of tea and then just beat the living fucking— If there's not enough sugar in there, he's beating the fuck out of you. Oh, he'll teabag a whole nation, bro. This guy looks like Teabagger, a superhero in Britain.

I don't want to fucks with this guy. What else we got? Dude, this guy will definitely, he'll Markle Megan, if you know what I'm saying, bro. Yeah, dude, bro. That guy puts it down, dude. I'll Markle Megan, bro. Don't touch me. King him.

We got a relationship advice. King him, bro, because I'll say this. Prince Charles is starting to look like a straight pussy, bro. Let's be honest, dude. Prince Charles? Which one's Prince Charles? Huh? Which one's Prince?

They both look like bitches, but which one's Prince? No, one of them was in look like bitches but yeah no one of them was in the war but one of them has just been no we mean war one flew over the war okay and then he's like oh i'm battle tested bitch you were in a bulletproof jet with 17 other dudes but i love you england uh my mom's from there is she really yeah bro born and raised wow i could see that a little bit. Yeah, mate. Raised, bro? Born and raised, bro. Mate. My bad, man. Power to the queen. Yeah, you don't know how a globe works. Power to

the queen, bro. Don't go to England. Huh? Don't go to England. I'm going to England. What? I'm going to England. You shouldn't. Yeah, well, I will. Well, you gotta get my approval. Go ahead. Nick Macadonia from Fort Lauderdale. Oh, dude, I love your nuts, bro. What's up, Theo and Brendan? Nick here from Miami, well, I will. Well, you got to get my approval. Go ahead. Nick Macedonia from Fort Lauderdale. Oh, dude, I love your nuts, bro. What's up, Theo and Brendan? It's Nick here from Miami, Florida, and I need some relationship advice.

What's up, bro? There's this girl I've been talking to for a few months now. She's been giving me some signals. What kind of signals? She wants it. Wants what? Hold on. Pause it real quick.

Hold on. Wants what? Your dick? First of all. Don't say wants it. Let's hear him say it one more time, man. Because I really love this guy. Mr. Macadonia.

Dude, he was all nonchalant. Hold on. Wants it. There's this girl I've been talking to for a few months now. She's been giving me some signal, you know. I think she wants it. Yeah. Okay, let's pause it right there if you don't mind.

Keep going. Now, Derek, what do you think about this guy out of the gate? You know, as somebody who, let's just say, has beef with aliens, okay, what do you think about a guy who, a regular white earthling, who says that girls like, what's your thoughts on Nick McAdonia? I think before he says some girl wants it, he should get out of his mom's living room. You know what I mean?

I was kind of feeling him. He seemed nice at first, right, until he went, throw me signs because girl wants it, he should get out of his mom's living room. You know what I mean? I was kind of feeling him. He seemed nice at first, right, until he went, throw me signs because she wants it. Well, he said the girl's sending out signals, which I also agree. A lot of times girls will send you signals like they'll leave their apartment early and go to work, which I'll take as a signal sometimes. Or you'll see a girl take her trash out late at night. Or watch TV and you think, oh, she's in the same things I am. Yeah.

Plays the radio and you're like, we're the same. We're soulmates. Yeah. Or you'll see that she gets a lot of the same type of mail that you get. And so there's a lot of ways to tell a lot of signals from women out there. It's hard to shift through all of it. Oh, it's hard to shift through it. Sometimes they'll play hard to get.

They'll drive home and they'll just drive right into there and they'll get out of their car and walk straight into their house without looking over at you. Yeah, which isn't cool when you're in the bush all goddamn day. Which isn't cool. I mean at least acknowledge I'm there. But it's also very coy and I kind of like that. Yeah, hard to get. Sometimes you got to go in the house. So we'll start with some advice after he asked from Derek and Kat.

Let's see what you guys have for this young man. He has a boyfriend who she's been with quite a while now. A couple years, four, five, something like that. That's nothing. He's too lazy about it. And, you know, we talk a lot and stuff, and I'm just really fucking confused because I don't know if she likes me, if she likes him. She tells me she has doubts in that relationship, and I don't know what to do.

Should I just let it go, you know, and kind of wait and do my own thing? Or should I tell her what I feel? I'm not really sure what to do. Anyways, let me know. Gang, gang, buzz, buzz. Theo, see you April 26th, West Palm Beach. Gang, bro. Buzz, buzz, gangsters.

I'll see you this weekend. Let's start with a lady's perspective, Kat. Well, she definitely doesn't want to be with her boyfriend anymore. No. I'll tell you that now. Yeah. You're just an easy out, honestly. Yeah.

You just need a reason. He's the outlet. Yeah, he's the outlet. If it's not him, it might be somebody else. No, she doesn't want either of them. She's talking to homeboy to pass time to something nice come swimming along. So he's just a bookmark. He's not really.

Should he make a move on her? I mean, if he's ready for the mess that ensues, I mean, her boyfriend may come after you. The mess you mean in his pants, Kat? No, she's talking about an actual human interaction, you creep. Derek? Get in there, bro, bro. Get in there. Unless you boys with him. If you're boys with that guy, not cool.

That sounds like he knows him, doesn't it? He would have mentioned that. I'd offer that macadamia, bro. You know what I'm saying? I'd drop a little, you know. I'd just come in hot, too. I'd pull my pants down. Such an old school move, you freak. Not if you're Louis C.K.

No, dude, you just see where you're at. That's true. Because right now it's blurry. Get your cock out. Well, here's the thing about Louis C.K. and people don't want to say this. The women weren't interested. He came in the plant.

You know what I'm saying? I thought it was thoughtful. Bro, I thought it was the most green way to sexually kind of infuriate someone. You diffuse the situation. Yeah. Oh, you don't want this? I'll give it back to Mother Nature. Nothing if you had a fucking lava lamp.

Yeah. Some lady's getting it. Mother Nature. Someone got it. Yeah. Imagine putting that into a lava lamp, though, and entertaining your friends for decades to come. Imagine passing your bust lamp or your bust orb onto your children. And it took years to complete.

Dad, is this all you're seaming, Dad? Nah, that's me and my buddies there. That's a whole. Oh, pirates are busting in the lamp. Was that a pirate? Oh, cool. Anybody. Okay.

Don't make me get that guy who had us rip his drip on your ass, dude. Michael Bisping. Early Bisping. The bully? Yeah, the bully. This guy, dude, the lines are blurry. She's not into either of them. He's just an outlet.

But see what's up. I think he's a nice man. He obviously shops at Pottery Barn if he gots that type of pillow with that different type of style on it. He's a little lazy, though. He has that posture. He just got done busting nuts, and he's just like, let me make a video for these boys. He's all like this. Not a lot of energy going on.

It's very Leaving Neverland of him. Yeah, I agree. Which I hate to remind you of different times in your life. But let's move on. What do I know, dude? Up next for relationship advice, we got Aaliyah. This is Aaliyah. Yo, gang gang. so i'm having trouble with my best friend

where were my best friend i slept with her boyfriend so we are kind of in the beef yo are you i try to apologize to her, but she's not listening. Should I still keep apologizing or should I just let it go? It's been a month now since we have spoken to each other. Well, I'm sorry you're going through this, Aaliyah. That one Aaliyah died, so you're doing better than her. You're doing better than her. And I'll say this as well, young lady, that you just can't apologize on her timeline. You can't apologize on your timeline.

You've got to apologize on her timeline. So you might just have to give it some space and then apologize again, find a different way to apologize, send a mail. Hey, can we address, though, that she fucked her best friend's man? She's not a victim. Oh, she's not a victim. I feel sorry for her. I don't feel sorry for her. I don't feel sorry for her, but I understand that she's trying to apologize. She just wants to apologize.

It's been a month, though. She's not going to be like, yeah, you're right. Let's get back and fucking go to Disneyland, girl. Right, she's not going to. You can't apologize fast. Apologize takes a long time. It takes an actual commitment. It takes a commitment to someone to prove to them that you feel bad about what happened, dude.

If you burn down somebody's fucking lavanderia or whatever, washateria, then they're fucking pissed, bro. And you got to fucking apologize to them over years. You got to pay them back, dude. And it's a big ordeal. It's tough when you fuck somebody's best friend, though, you know? It's tough. Yeah, and it's probably you're not going to have a friendship with her. No, it's probably over, huh?

For maybe this life cycle. But you can build for the next life. Oh, reincarnation motherfucker, I'll see you again. You might come back as elephants. And then you're cool. Yeah, and next time you're not going to fucking stampede on her man. No. Yeah. Share peanuts.

Yeah, you're going to be... Yeah, next time if you're... Yeah, the only thing you'll be sharing is peanuts. So that's what I would say. I would say, look, this life I fucked up. She seems sorry though. Then she seems a little down. She's a pretty lady. She's a pretty lady, man.

Super pretty. But she seems also like she might fuck somebody's fucking, her friend's boyfriend. Yes. That's what it appears, huh? Yeah. So that's, you know. There's that too. And you know what?

It kind of turns me on. And I bet she's going to, I bet she's going to be all right in life. I bet she's going to be fine. Well, dude, you also won the Neverland Ranch. You're sticking on the Michael Jackson? Bro, you were actually molested as a child. My parents left the shit out of me. No one touched my dick, bro.

Wasn't even the Boy Scouts. Nobody my dick bro Wasn't even the Boy Scouts Nobody believes you crazy wigger bro You're fucking dressed up like a psychopath I'm dressed like a psycho? You have tattoos? You look like you're sponsored by the goodwill What are you talking about? You look like the WNBA gave you their clothes

This is a cotton shirt you goon Yeah whatever bro Bro what are you talking about dude bro you look like a dude that referee bro you look like a referee at a fucking swim meet in jacksonville dude i'll take it look horrible dude you need new friends bro you need to not get nick's approval on the way you dress man you're boths. You can't have another creep tell you you look good. Yeah, small hat gang, bro. Why don't you fucking get a hat that fits you?

Dude, why don't you get a haircut that's relevant to a 19? This is a good haircut. It's only two weeks old. All right. What else you got? Up next, we're going to do Flump My Aunt. Bring it. Start with Aunt Janney Smith.

Aunt Janney Smith. Oh, Janney. I want Chin's aunt back on this bitch. Remember Chin's fine ass aunt? Oh, yeah, bro. She's sitting in my DMs with a tit. The Dust Bowl bad girl, bro? I remember her.

She seemed like somebody. Fucking Korean barbecue bad girl. Oh, dude. Of mice and maybe I'll bust on you. She was hot, bro. She was from the 1930s, bro. Tango and bust, bro. Amen, man. Chin and

M, bro. I am whatever you say I am. I'm staying up in that A. That shit was a happy ending. Yeah. This is Stan, bro. What's up with this girl? She's modeling a tractor? Yeah, this is Aunt Janie Smith. She just recovered from heart surgery. Oh, man. She's got a tractor? Yeah, this is Aunt Janie Smith. She just recovered

from heart surgery. Oh, man. She's got a lot of love to give, dude. Look, I'll let you I'll never write you a John Deere letter, I promise you, that beautiful lady out here. And obviously hanging out in the lobby of a Cracker Barrel, they let you do this type of stuff, or they let you dress up. And Janie Smith, obviously named after the apples, which are right on the wall behind her. Is that an apple? Can we zoom out the other way? She looks like a free spirit, huh? She does.

Looks like a free spirit with a good heart. Sell you some apples, maybe a little weed on the side. Yeah, she could also— A little hippie vibe, huh? Yep, she's got that hippie vibe, that Georgia hippie vibe. She also looked like she could possibly moonlight as a Bret Michaels, you know, show up at parties, at children's parties and stuff. Sing a little Bret Michaels. What was his big jam?

We both lost our little knees dealing the day to the night. All the songs. And then he banged all those freaking ladies. Rock the love. You know there's a new one with the Jersey. And then he banged all those freaking ladies. Rock of Love. Oh, he banged. You know there's a new one with the Jersey Shore boys. No way. Yeah.

It's called. Sex Crimes Van. I forget what it's called. I forget, but it's the Jersey Shore boys. It's basically Rock of Love, but with fucking Jersey Shore. Yeah, but Pauly Shore is a blackface in these days or whatever that guy is. God, lay off the tanner, Pauly. Dude, what are you just fucking injecting chocolate milk in your cheeks?

That guy is getting a little dark these days. Double shot at love. Yeah. Might be something worth checking out for us. But yeah, I love this. I love the Bret Michaels vibe. Congratulations on the new A-orders, and you just rock those fucking love sockets and just keep them popping. Yeah, good luck on the veins, girl.

Pump, pump, gang, gang. You feel me? That vast deference, bro. You know what I'm saying? That Venus fly trap, that long one in your neck. Go. Up next, we got Grandpa Pete. This is Grandpa Pete.

You mean Danny DeVito? First of all, this guy looks like every character from an 80s movie, I feel like, in one person. He looks like Danny DeVito if he was hunting. He looks like Daddy Shaq, bro. This dude looks like every character from Daddy Shaq in one person. Like they combined all the characters? He looks like the happiest guy in the whole world. Where is he, in Iowa?

He looks like he'll sell you minnows. Yeah, he does. That's what he does. It looks like he'll sell you minnows. Yeah, he does. That's what he does. It looks like he'll sell you minnows right out of his stomach, dude. Like, I swear to God, he could just put one of those big spoons into himself and just pour some in a cup. Do we have any facts on this dude? He loves fishing, golfing, and watching TV.

Then hello, we just labeled his whole life, Caddyshack. He likes living, bro. Yeah. Oh, this guy looks like an organ donor, dude. Like he'd just cut you off a piece of his own liver right there and put it into you. And it's going to be good, too. You know, the liver is one of the only regenerative, and that's not a racial slur, it's one of the only regenerative organs.

You know that? You could cut your liver in half, give half of it to someone, give half of it to Kat. And it'll grow back? It'll grow back for you and it'll grow back for her. I didn't know that. Yep. So you can liver.

So if you're dying or somebody's dying, don't eat all their liver. Eat a little bit of it and let more grow back. Shout out to Danny DeVito, though, doing the damn thing. Yeah, this guy seemed like

he could definitely serve me. Grandpa. He looks more like an uncle. I'm going to call him a grandpa. Oh, I bet you could pull an eel right out of his piss stream, dude. This guy seems like a real fucking St. Bernard of a human, and I like him. Looks like he owns leeches. What else you got?

Our last one is Aunt Nisha. This is Aunt Nisha from Magna, Utah. Oh. Oh, damn. She enjoys eating wet burritos and loves That 70s Show. Is that a sexual term? What's a wet burritos and loves that 70s show. Is that a sexual term?

What's a wet burrito? I think it's a burrito covered in that sauce. Oh, you're talking about that burrito that's covered like tostada style? I think so. Enchilada style? Yes. They put the enchilada sauce on top and then the cheese. Wet burrito sounds super sexual.

Does it? Yeah, bro. You trying to get that wet burrito, girl? Yeah. Oh, dude, that's a pickup line in Tucson. If you didn't know, wet burrito, Cleveland Steamer. What? Two totally different meals, brother.

I'll say that. Yeah! Bro, you ain't lying. Dude, you're disgusting. She also considers herself a smilf. What is that? A single mom I'd like to... Oh, wow.

Yeah. Okay, that's a show on the showtime isn't it smilfs i think so and what were the smurfs dude single well that was a call many they were that was a blue cult the blue man group is a cult uh this aunt looks like she's into some fucking the dark arts as you would say she was like she likes magic. She looks like she likes black things. Oh, she'll look like she'll fucking do a dabber-cadabber, bro. Like she'll take a hard dab and fuck anybody in the house, dude. I shouldn't say that.

Actually, she seems like a nice lady, man. She has a clean apartment or clean home. She has two dog bowls right there in the back. So she's feeding them puppies, dude. Dog bowls? What kind of dogs does she have? Those look like human bowls. Look how big those bowls are.

Maybe her dog's like cereal, dude. Maybe she has Dobermans. Maybe she has St. Bernard's. Good point. Okay? And she's obviously the kind of lady that works hard. She has a... She's 25?

Yeah. Enjoys wet burritos, 70s show. That show doesn't run anymore. I like her, though. She has her own style, kind of. Because what 25-year-old is watching that 70s show? I don't blame you, though. There's a lot of bad television now

so why not watch good television? There's just a lot of bad stuff out there. Yeah, I mean, I'm not mad at her. Look at this auntie. Oh dude, I would probably take her somewhere nice. What's her name again, Derek? Magna. She's in Utah?

Utah. Girl, you need to take her to the Red Iguana. No, she's from Magna, Utah. Her name's Aunt Nisha. And she's from Utah. Okay. Why did he say her name? I thought her name was Magna. That's where she's from. That's a dopena, Utah. Her name's Aunt Nisha. And she's from Utah. Okay. Why did he say her name? I thought her name was Magna.

That's where she's from. That's a dope name. I know. Aunt Nisha? Aunt Nisha. Aunt Nisha. All right. Well, you need to take her to Red Iguana in Utah, bro.

They have the best wet burritos in the land. They do? Yeah. Shout out to Salt Lake City. I'll take her anywhere. Shout out to Ants. Yeah. She seemed like the kind of girl you would maybe take abroad, take her to a foreign country, take her to the Filipinos,

take her to Canada. Nah, they don't have wet burritos out there, bro. Take her to Canada or white Canada, some people call it. I don't know. Take her to fucking where? Cleveland? No, you need to take her to fucking— Dog track somewhere.

Where do women like to go these days? I don't know. I haven't been on a date in so long. Legoland. Legoland, yeah. Yeah, her to lego land and stack that ass up you feel me i'm just joking and i shouldn't say they got wet burritos there bro no they don't will you quit saying wet burritos i can't that did such an interesting detail wet burrito oh i agree the second it's a sexual term no shit buddy, buddy. It is now. Yeah. Who wants that? Dude, you want me to wet your burrito? No, guy.

Can you quit smiling, dude? It's so clever. Oh, my God. It's code word, bro, like Pizzagate. I know it is. I can't believe you're so shocked. I just never wet your burrito, bro. I can't believe you're so shocked by a good metaphor wet your burrito bro I can't believe you're so shocked

by a good metaphor she's trying to fuck bro she's trying to fuck she has children already and two dogs she has enough to deal with she's a smith dude yeah but she has enough

to deal with dude you're not even thinking about that you're just trying to fuck this lady dude she's the one that wants the wet burrito she wants what else you got I king her

I think she's a beautiful lady and best of luck to you out there. Shout out to Utah. Magna Gorda. Last segment, boys. Kinging or sting it. All right. Our first one comes from Annalise Mortimer and her dog, Marley, from British Columbia, Canada.

That's what I'm saying. Hey, Brennan. Who's taking the video? Love you guys. Love you. My dog, Marley. What's up? My boyfriend, Corey, is videotaping. Oh, Who's taking the video? Love you guys. Love you. This is my dog, Barley. What's up? My boyfriend, Corey, is videotaping.

Oh, what's up, dog? So we are from Canada, and we love hockey up here. So we were wondering if you could understand it like hockey, if you guys like hockey or Canadian. Thanks. Love you guys. Gang, gang. Buzz, buzz. Love you, girl.

Buzz, buzz. Buzz, buzz. We out on hockey, bro. You got the hockey haircut. Dude, first of Buzz, buzz. Love you, girl. Buzz, buzz. Buzz, buzz. We out on hockey, bro. You got the hockey haircut. Dude, first of all, and thank you for saying that. People sometimes say mullet this, mullet that, dude. That's the Eric Lindros. Yeah, bro.

Here's what I say. Your mother, okay? Because the deal is this. In Canada, this is a hockey haircut. In Philippines, this is a fucking, this is a fucking, you're a blonde woman. In different places, you're different things. It's a pedophile's haircut. Yeah, dude. But it fucking, you're a blonde woman. In different places, you're different things. In Texas, it's a pedophile's haircut.

Yeah, dude. But it depends where you're at, bro. But a top-notch pedophile, bro. Yeah, not like a low-level. Yeah, no scammers, bro. You know what I'm saying? Not somebody who's just raising minnows in their stomach. Yeah, not a Backpage Craigslist. I know.

You're talking about a champion, bro. Yes. Here's what I would love to think today is that I do like hockey and I love Canadians. Yes. Here's what I would love to think today is that I do like hockey and I love Canadians. And I have a feeling as America turns more into an airport for the rest of the world that a lot of Americans will become Canadians and move up there. So I hope to see you guys soon. The beautiful dog, Marley, was the dog's name.

Marley. Here's the thing with hockey. Racist as fuck. In hockey, everyone encourages the white guys to fight all the time. But in the NBA, a few black guys fight and they're thugs. But every goddamn night in the NHL, someone's getting knocked out. What's the name? Fucking Ola Lynch, the number one hockey player in the world, just knocked out some 19-year-old.

Everyone celebrated it. Then you get one little tiff in the NBA and they're thugs. Well, that's true, man. I have a problem with it, bro. Also, NHL, football on ice. Yeah. A lot of UFC fighters on ice. Is it? Oh, yeah.

Very violent out there in NHL. Super violent. We just fuck with it. Yeah. Hardest sport in the world, dog. I'll give you that. But look, then I would like to see this then. Hockey players against black people against aliens.

On ice? Yes. Oof. With a ball out there, too. Oof. On ice? White dudes own that shit. Aliens?

You don't know what they're going to fucking do, you idiot. I'm going to assume the white guys don't own the ice. You think aliens are going to come all the way here and then not beat everyone? Not on ice. I don't know. Not on ice, bro. That's a good point, actually. You give them too much respect.

That's true, dude. I think... Oh, speaking of hockey, what about this dude? Here's a picture of him. Brady Takachik is a legend, they said, this guy. Fake-ass Rat Kings out there. Whoa, he's calling himself the Rat King? Yeah.

Hey, Brady Takachik, whatever the fuck your name is. Come at us, bro. Yeah. Come at us. We own that name, dude. Well, people said he's decent. They said they got a brother, whatever the little one is, the little rat that plays for Calgary. And I love Calgary, man.

Best crowd. Some of the best comedy crowds ever. Talking about yuck yucks? But yeah, they got the dude, the little guy called himself the younger brother or whatever. And I told him he can come get these straight up semen pinatas under my meat, brother, if you want them. You know what I'm saying? Come get these fucking hands, man. There's only one rat king up in here, bro.

No, I didn't say that. I said come get these nuts, daddy. Yeah, and I'm saying come get these hands. You know what I'm saying? Come get these fucking hands, man. There's only one Rat King up in here, bro. No, I didn't say that. I said come get these nuts, daddy. Yeah, and I'm saying come get these hands. You heard what I was saying. And Calgary lost. They lost four games in a row to the Avalanche, bro. Colorado Avalanche, bro. What's your fucking name?

That's where you're from. Yeah, bro. Av's country, baby. Avalanche-a-lancha. For sure take that shirt off. And also, I king hockey, though. You do. Toughest sport in the world, yeah.

I do, too. I king hockey, too. Toughest sport in the world, yeah. I do, too. I king hockey, too, man. Those are tough, tough guys. Only sport you can fight, and no one gets a fucking felony. That's true. Just beat the fuck out of each other. That's true. The Rat King's a land animal, though.

Also, Wayne Gretzky? Come on, bro. Yeah, do you see his daughter? Oh, bro, you're on it today. Today, I am. You need to go to church more often. I will. What else we got?

Up next is Hannah Deboos. Piercing! Hannah Deboos from San Diego. Hannah Deboo. What's her name? Titania? Hannah, D-E-B-U-S. Hannah Montana.

Deboos-y? Hey, Theo. Buzz, buzz, gang, gang. My name is Hannah. I am 21 years old. I'm originally from San Diego, but I go to school in Phoenix. I am a student nurse. My King Edder Stingit for you guys is girls with abs.

Oh, my God. What did she say? Put your boner away. She wants a child? I couldn't hear it for a little bit. Oh, no. What is she doing? Hitting that vase. Oh, rewind that for me. I missed it.

I was looking at your boner. When she lifts her abs, you go, oh, my God. Before that, rewind me a decent amount, if you don't mind, Derek. My king at her sting it for you guys is girls with abs. Oh, my God. Kind of cute, too much. Let me know what you think. I think both.

Mm-hmm, me too. Oh, and then she hits that vape. Oh, she's sucking it. Sucking that vape, bro. That shit's so bad for you. So fucking lonely. I know, dude. You just want to bust.

No, I don't. I want to hug somebody. You want to hug her with abs? Yeah, I want to watch Dateline together with someone and be glad that we're still alive because somebody else got murdered. There's people who will do that for you, Theo. I don't know if she's the type, but there's someone. What do you mean, guy?

She takes care of herself. Look at her apartment's clean. You know what the problem is? You're too soft for her. You know what I'm saying? Like, you're too. You think so? Yeah, too jello.

Do you really think that or not? Yeah, I do. She's ripped. It'd be like sleeping with a fucking panther. Oh, wow. You want to hug a panther? Just fucking cock diesel muscle? But panthers are only violent on camera and stuff.

You see them behind the scenes. They're pretty chill. They're docile. She seemed like a nice lady, a registered nurse, she said. Oh, I love nurse. A traveling nurse. No, she's a... Yeah, I think in school to be a...

A registered nurse. So you know she's going to take care of you? Dude, I'll cut my leg open right here with a fucking scalpel just to get her to stop by. I'm that kind of guy. We got to go to Phoenix. Huh? Yeah, yeah. Phoenix isn't that far.

Dude, I'm going to Phoenix on Friday. I'm going to pass out. Are you really? Yeah. I'm just going to hold my breath. Dude, get that second... See if she comes along. Get that secondhand CPR for me.

You feel me? Yeah, I'll tell you how it goes. What's her name? Ramona? Hannah. Hannah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Hannah. I'll do it Sandlot style. You're disgusting, man. I'm sorry, Hannah, on behalf of Brendan. No, don't be, girl. Me and her can talk about

fucking working on shit. Talk about whatever you want, dude. Talk about crying at night. Yeah, talking with Brendan's really great, dude. He has a fucking word chart with like 30 words on it. You just show signs. Yeah. And then you call your mom to approve the signs from homeschool. Yeah.

Dude, two rips disturbing, though. You don't want a girl more ripped than you are, though. You know what I'm saying? You don't want calluses on her hands. She should be under arrest for disturbing the beast, bro, because my wiener woke up when I saw this gal. What was she asking us about? Rip or drip? I think you look okay.

No, she was saying girls who are too shredded, like abs. Oh, too shredded is insane. If you're all fucking jacked, if you have a mole on your neck that also has muscles coming out of it, get the fuck out of here. Yeah, I don't want to fuck Michael B. Jordan. You know what I'm saying?

Like too shredded. I don't want to hug somebody and come Jordan. You know what I'm saying? Like, too shredded. I don't want to hug somebody and come in second. You feel me? So you got to tighten up and loosen up. Just be cool. Just do what you want to do. She might just be genetically gifted, though. Some girls are just genetically fucking shredded. And it's just abs. I just don't like a girl that has, like, abs

on her b-hole. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, it's just abs. Yeah, you can't be that. You can't have abs and a cock, you know what I'm saying? Like, you got to pick one. Yeah, don't work out so hard you start sprouting a straight root, you feel me? Yeah. Let's hear more. Yeah.

Next up is. Shout out to that girl, though. Yeah, you pervert. We got it. Dude, you're the one that rewinded and had a boner. Yeah, that's a natural. Can you talk to your PO officer? That's something natural that happens in your body, you idiot.

You better talk to your therapist. Up next is from Blake. This video is from Blake Presley from South Knoxville, Tennessee. Look at that boat motor in the background. Did he kill so many fish? What's up, Brandon Theo? This is Blake from Knoxville, Tennessee. I think everybody should have a hobby.

So I've got a king it or sting it for you. Bass fishing. Now, Brandon Shale, before you jump to that wiggle the worm joke, there's a lot more to it than that. Maybe you want to pitch that jig. Maybe you want to skip that toad. Educate them, bro. Maybe you walk that spook on them topwaters.

Walk that spook? That's racist. You really want to get down on it. Well, so is pitch that jig. Sometimes you peg and shake that beaver. Dude, this sounds racial. That's where the old comes from. They rip that trap down there. Gang gang. Sometimes you peg and shake that beaver. Dude, this sounds racial. That's where Theo comes from.

They rip that trap down there. Gang gang. Think about that outboard hitter right there. I like this guy, bro. That guy's great, dude. He educated us on some fucking deep sea fishing, baby. Dude, that guy will catch a second wife on one of those things, man. That dude has some real.

That guy catch a body in that lake. I'll tell you that right now. He knows a little too much about it. Bro, you go fishing those things, man. That dude has some real... I gotta catch a body in that lake right now. He knows a little too much about it. Bro, you go fishing in Florida, man, you'll come up with a large mouth deceased person, dude. They got a lot of wildlife out there. Catch some Dexter bodies in Florida. Oh, that's a Dexter belt, dude,

over there in Florida. You know, most episodes of First 48 are filmed in Florida. Yeah, and also that's where it inspired Dexter. Yeah. Yeah. True story. So it's obviously murder country, but hell yeah, man. Dexter's a documentary.

Bass fishing's beautiful, man. It's a real art. You got to get out there. Have you ever been? I have been bass fishing, man. I've been regular fishing. Have you? It's a long day.

Yeah. It's a long day. If you're not good, it's just you and your buddy staring at the water. I mean, it ain't Instagram. It's the total opposite of Instagram, you know? Yeah, you're not going to get satisfaction like this. Right. It's out there.

You got to relax. It's going to take a couple hours. You can complain five or six hours into it. There's a little bit of window for homosexuality if you want it. They got everything. As long as you're on the boat, you're good. They have drinking. They have everything you want out there.

So you can really get out there and enjoy yourself. Sunburn. You get a year's worth of sun right there in one afternoon. I would go with him. I'd go with him too. I'd go with a pro. He seems fun. He does seem fun. I was in Randy Moss fishing invitational one time. It was bass fishing and I had diarrhea that

day. That'll get you. I didn't know that once you got on the boat, you're out there for the entire time. You had to hold the shits? Bro. You started chumming the waters? Oh, dude, at one point, I had to have them hang me off the back of the boat. And chum the water? I didn't have any choice, yeah.

You had to chum the water or shit? Bro, the guys, like, I just kept saying, I have to go to the restroom. The guy was like, oh, just piss off the back of the boat, man. You're like, nah, I ain't got to piss, homie.

Yeah. I got to piss out my anus. Yeah. I got to do a thick one out of the, you know, I got to. Damn, so you did it and everyone just held you? I had to.

I literally had to take off all my clothes and hang off the boat. And it was a real fishing tournament. Like, somebody won like $60,000 or something. It probably fucked the rest of the fishers up. Oh, no, there was tons of lakes. This was in Minnesota out there, Lake Minnetonka. And it was... I met Roy Jones Jr. there.

That's cool. That's pretty cool. Did he have CT then or no? How many years ago was this? He seemed good. It was probably 13 years ago. Oh, yeah. He's straight.

I like this guy. Bass fishing king. King it. Hell, yeah, boys. All right. Next up, we got Drew Dawson from Topeka, Kansas. Seems like a four-hour show today, huh? Like Game of Thrones 9.

I don't think so. We're not that long. No? Yo, what up, Theo? What up, Brendan? My name is Drew from Topeka, Kansas. What's up, Drew? I'm a big fan of the show.

Jayhawk love. I got a king of the sting it today for y'all. First off, let me thank y'all for helping me get through my day sometimes, man. When I'm at work, I work a little factory gig, man, and I just set up the phone and run some King of the Sting it fighting the kid this past weekend yeah and it makes hours feel like minutes love it man so I appreciate y'all for that this is Jay Cole is beautiful anyway my question for y'all today is polyamorous relationships three people involved in a relationship together whether whether that be two girls, one guy, two guys, one girl.

Depending on what state you're from, it could be two cousins and a nephew. I don't know. Could be three dudes. A polyamorous relationship. King or the stinger. Yeah. Couldn't be also. I would say put a woman in there if you're even guesstimating.

But you do what you got to do, Brendan. Three dudes. Brendan, they call them. Two rivers, three dudes. Two rivers, three dudes. That's what it's going to say on your freaking tune. I just feel like it's so messy, man. You know anyone who's in a polyamorous relationship just doing the damn thing, thriving?

I don't. Yeah, I mean, look, I think it takes a lot of communication. You know, back in the day, they used to have polyamorous relationships. Hugh Hefner did it? Yeah, look at the Mayflower, the Penta, dude. You fuck whoever's alive on there, you know? So it's like anything was possible. Do you know anyone doing it these days, though?

Like just doing the damn thing? Look, I'll tell you this. I had a guy come to my show recently, and he had two girlfriends. And that was it. And they were both cool with each other, and everybody was chill and it was a just a loving community you know and i believed it with this i think as long as there's clear communication because sometimes it's like what are you drawing the line against really you know if somebody if you can still love someone but i don't fucking know dude i'm fucking lonely and i'm on medication also

so get two girls see how it goes man be the So get two girls. See how it goes, man. Be the guinea pig. Oh, I know how it'll go, man. You know, it'll go fine for a little while. Maybe get a girl and a dude the way, you know? No. All right, I'm just spitballing ideas here, bro. You seem lonely and sad.

Yeah, think of other ideas fast, you weirdo. Two dudes. I don't know what you're into. Listen, if you're getting pulled off, fuck yeah. If you can't, it's going to be a nightmare. The pros and cons. Pros, you're fucking two different girls all the time. So fun.

Cons, you got two chicken heads harassing you all the time. Just drama, drama, drama, drama. Pros, cons. What happened? Where are you? Where am I? Yeah. Here's what I say, dude.

And can you bust two nuts a day? Sometimes it's tough. I can't bust two nuts a week, dude. You're older, bro. First of all, fucking anybody seems like totally outlandish these days. I'd way rather do some PlayStation or do something more entertaining. Yeah, you hate burning calories. Well, dude, I just don't want to be fucking somebody.

Bong, bong, bong, bong, bong, ah! You know? Then you have to eat or get a drink or a milk or something. See, this is why I say get a dude. I don't want a dude. I don't want to fuck anybody, you idiot. I just said that, dude. I'm not fucking some goddess

for no reason. Well, get a dude and play idiot. I just said that, dude. I'm not fucking some goddess for no reason. That's stupid. Well, get a dude and play PlayStation. I would maybe do that. You should do the big brother thing. What is it? It's where you get a big brother. And he just plays PlayStation with you like once a week or some shit.

You never heard of that? It's a black guy? Yeah, if you want. I would do it. Get a big brother. Oh, you could do it. We'll find you a black guy yeah if you want i would do it get a big brother you can do it we'll find you a black guy yeah i say king it though if you can handle it i don't want some white brother dude i want jason williams hanging out at my house all day you know what i'm saying you want bubba sparks hanging out your house i don't want fucking yeah i don't want paul wall or bill clinton fucking hanging out with me all day, dude. You know what I'm saying? I mean, shout out to some legit wigs out there, but still, man.

Anyway. But look, Mr. Dawson, what's his name? Drew Dawson. Drew Dawson, man. Thank you very much, man. I'm glad that we were able to entertain you, dude. And we do try our best when we get in here. We try, man.

And I say the communication is the key. If you can just be honest about it and let them know what's going on. Because here's the thing. I think some people that are equipped to love others can really do a good job of it. You might have the gift of being able to love two people well. Whereas some other fucking jerk off, like old fucking Cinnamon Wilson over here, fucking Michael Jackson's little lava lamp over here. Michael Jackson's lava lamp?

Dude, you've been in therapy since you were four, and you can't get a fucking connection with another human being. Dude, get a fucking owl. Hang out with an owl. Do something. Owls are fake, bro. If you look under their skirt, they don't have a lot of meat on them. But yeah, man, I say King it.

What was he asking about? I say King it. I don't know anyone who's done it successfully other than Hugh Hefner. I think he was miserable. Right, I think he was miserable. But his was all about the sex. I think if you can find some joy in there, too, then you can figure it out better. I don't know anyone who's doing it. I think we're on the cusp of it, though, dude.

Things change. Things go and change. So the guy who's alone at night. Yeah, whatever, dude. At least I don't have some son always bothering me, a two-year-old son. Yeah, that's one way to look at it. Sorry, that's true. Never mind, man.

He's a beautiful kid. Thanks, man. Is that it, bro? That's it today, fellas. Praise God, man. We did it, bro. You started with the Jesus juice and ended with the Satan juice. Yep, that's it, man.

And I'm sorry. I know I was probably in a negative attitude today, man. I'm sorry if I was rude. No, it's just you in general. That could be true, man. And I'm sorry. I know I was probably in a negative attitude today, man. I'm sorry if I was rude. No, it's just you in general. It could be true, man. And we appreciate you, bro. Thanks, bro. Medicated or not, bro.

Fuck Khabib, bro. That's what I'm saying, dude. You should talk shit to Khabib. Let me know how it goes for you. Oh, I was not going to go to Khabib. Have you seen his entourage? I'm already nervous, yeah. Dude, I bought-

Oh, I hope they bully you. Dude, I bought fucking HGH from his entourage, dude. I don't want part of the- I don't want in on this. I don't want in on this. I don't want in on that. Dagestan. Dagestan.com for your. Kingsting merch drops this Friday.

I'm in Phoenix Friday and Saturday. Stand up live. Dio, where you at, brother? I'm in West Palm Beach this weekend. I think there's still tickets. Actually, I think it's sold out. But also dropping dates this week. By the end of this week, we'll be dropping some new dates for Vancouver, Boise,

Sacramento, a couple of different fun places. And I will let everybody know where listeners can get the tickets first. I'm in Tampa and Cleveland too this month. Alright guys, love ya. Thank you, love ya. Get some King of the Sting merch and thank you guys so much for your support. Peace.