The Golden Hour - Episode 171: Vin Diesel Fan Club

Episode Date: April 29, 2022

The guys discuss joining OnlyFans, rate their looks and talk Theo's new hairstyle, Brendan's gull hair, Chris' new "tan", Vin Diesel being Vin Diesel, Breathe Right Strips, Elon Musk buying Twitter, body odor vs too much cologne, J.Cole doing standup and much more!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Go to it right now. Bluenow.com. Promo code K-A-T-S. You go to Equinox. Well, where you go, bro? Zoo Culture, Gold's Gym. Real gyms, dude. Real gyms, Chris. Alright, alright, alright. Gold's Gym? It has gold in the title of it? Yeah, dude. Rich, huh? Rich. Yeah, rich.

Rich, no. Yeah, why don't you go to Diamond Gym or Mars Gym? Yeah, dude. Dude, huh? Rich shit. No, rich, no. Yeah, why don't you go to Diamond Gym, Mars Gym? Yeah, dude. Dude, Chris goes to Equinox. What? What about the World Bank of America Gym, you idiot? Yeah, dude. Boo.

You ever met this guy? Oh, I'm the dumb one. You can't argue. There's something about me. You have no idea what you're saying. Gang, gang. Buzz, buzz. Soar.

What kind of shirt is that, Theo? Mr. Vaughn. Page and Mr. Vaughn. What's up, boys? This is a shirt called Hot Hose Hit. This is from a line we had over there, Theo Vaughn website. You full of shit, man. That's a WWE Triple H shirt, man. Nice try. from a line we had over there, Theo Vaughn website. You full of shit, man.

That's a WWE Triple H shirt, man. Nice try. Nice try, sir. Dude, why don't you juggle my nuts, son? This is a shirt from a couture line we had. Nice. Nice. It goes good with your hair. I like your hair.

I like how it's growing out a little bit on the front. Oh, thanks, man. Just dropped down, huh? Just dropped down. It grew too long. Can't style it up anymore. That shit just dropped down. Looks nice. Oh, that's true. Yeah, I appreciate it, man. At a certain point, you gotta make a choice on your hair.

Well, you can't really make the choice anymore. It's just gonna fucking drop the fuck down. You style it up, that would be crazy. It's real long. You can go longer? I don't even think it's that long right now, honestly. What? Well, it is.

It's long up the back, dude. And also, sometimes life decides how your hair is going to go. Make a poster of that. Well, God is Brian Callen's barber. You know what I'm saying? Right. He tells him how it's going to go. He has no options. Right. You guys have options. We don't have options. That's Right. Like, he tells him how it's going to go. He has no options.

Right. You guys have options. We know I have options. That's obvious. Yeah, you got options. But you guys have options. You don't. Honestly, Theo,

I don't think Brendan has options. With my hair? Yeah. I think if you grew it out, it would be worse than a guy going bald. How much hair does he have right now? Bro, I have so much more hair

than everybody in this room. I get to worry about my hair running into my eyebrows. I understand. I'm like a daddy standing. He looks like a lesbian stewardess on an ice cream truck is what he looks like. Without a mask, though, bitch. Here we go. I'm saying that if you grew it out, you'd look terrible.

No, I'd look fucking sweet, dude. You'd look sexy? I'd look like Jared Leto. I don't want to talk about Jared Letoo number one period and also so early but theo knows him now i have a direct path to him theo tell us about leto chris what are you doing out in the daytime i think is what a lot of us know you know what nightwalker okay but guess what and i know the fucking elephant in the room yeah i got color got color. Look at my face. No.

No, no. No. I don't know how Theo's camera is, but there's no color. Look at you. Yeah. It goes in there with the red. No, you look like Boo Radley at a Jack Harlow show, I feel like. I don't think you. Sounds like a good time.

Yeah. I love Jack Harlow. You don't know anything about him, Brennan, and you don't think Sounds like a good time Yeah I love Jack Harlow You don't know anything About him Brendan And you don't have any color You think just cause You're into white rappers You know everything

We fly in first class I'm not into white rappers Up in the sky Come on dog I'm the biggest Jark Harlow fan Jark Harlow I'm the biggest

John Harlow fan John Harlow There you go An Italian rapper Yeah Uccello Uccello Uccello Collini Yeah I'm the biggest Giancarlo fan. Giancarlo. An Italian rapper. Yeah. Uccello, uccello, uccello, colini. Yeah.

Listen. Oh, yeah. Prosciutto, prosciutto, prosciutto. Oh, I like that. Buongiorno, buongiorno, buongiorno. Buongiorno, buongiorno. Listen, guys. Mattarella, Mattarella.

Okay, so everyone stop what they're doing right now. Magarita, maraghera. Everyone even listening, stop what they're doing right now. Go watch Gringo Poppy. Somebody has to say it, dude. Gringo Poppy's out. It's out. Go watch Gringo Poppy. It's fucking Brendan's second special, even though his dad thinks it's his first.

It's his second special. It's out on YouTube. Go get them clicks up. Gringo Poppy is out right now. So it's on YouTube. It's out on YouTube. Go get them clicks up. Gringo Papi is out right now. So it's on YouTube. It's all over Thickboy. So go take a look and fucking thumbs it up and comment. You know what I mean?

Keep that algorithm moving. Yes, sir. Thank you, sir. Yeah. Appreciate you guys, man. Congratulations on getting it out. Thanks, brother. I appreciate you guys, man.

You guys motivate me and give me support more than you know. So I love you guys. Well, love you back. Well, don't gay out, honestly. No, honestly. Well, I got to gay it up a little bit. Gay out a little bit, honestly. And that's what, by the way, I think that we should do promo stuff.

Like, I'm going to be in Phoenix on Saturday. I think we should do promo stuff earlier on, dude. Really? Yeah, dude. Don't you think people, like, I'm going to be in, like, okay, so here's the deal. I'm going to be in phoenix saturday uh celebrity.com celebrity theater two shows go get tickets see because people stop watching youtube videos like 20 something minutes in right that's true dude sometimes i forget to tell people

that i'm doing an extra show at the wiltern on may 7th see See, there you go! And I'm coming to Georgia in June. Three different cities in Georgia. You probably sold an extra 20 tickets because we did that way earlier. Right now, I'll tell you what's crazy is I dropped a special, but I got a new hour, man. I'm in Charlotte, May 5th through the 7th, Comedy Zone. Your boy's still in clubs. Be cool, man.

Comedy Zone, Charlotte. And then I go to Philly at the Helium. So get you some. Brendan's one year away from doing porn, I think, honestly. But that's just, you know. You know how much that would fucking actually crush? Dude, if you did porn on OnlyFans and fucked you too? Dude, forget our Patreon.

I heard that bad baby made like 40 mil. 50 mil. And then had a receipt because everyone's like, you're so full of shit. She goes, oh, really? And she goes, suck on this, then posted the actual numbers from the OnlyFans. And you look at it like, holy shit. She made 40 million a year? 50 million in a year, sir.

Just by showing them titties? I don't know what she does on there. What does she do on there? Oh, does she not even show titties? I don't know. Theo would know or Nick. That'd be my best guess. I don't know what she does on there. What does she do on there? Oh, does she not even show titties? I don't know. Theo would know or Nick. That'd be my best guess. I don't know. Theo, you should... She's the number one female... Bro, she's one of the top 60

or 70 female wigas in the world. So first of all, you gotta respect that, bro. She's got her game up. Honestly, she made this much money. 50 mil. Gang. 50 mil. Gang. 50 mil, dude.

She just bought a house in fucking Boca Raton. Six million cash, daddy. Cash. Y'all need to get off this. This is a damn child, isn't it? Y'all need to quit even looking at this child. It was all over the news, dude. This is news, bro. Do you even get the news out there?

I don't even know where the fuck you're at. You're pretending you're in Nashville? Who's buying that? Look at the news, dude. Yeah, this is news, bro. So what? Do you even get the news out there, Theo? I don't even know where the fuck you're at. You're pretending you're in Nashville? Who's buying that? Look at your set, dude. You could be anywhere right now. Where you at, Ukraine, Theo? Bro, that's a green screen, and it's not even a good green screen. It's just a curtain, dude.

Yeah, you're fooling nobody, dude. You're on vacation in the Bahamas, huh? Oh, yeah? Guess what? Do this math, son. How about that? One. One.

One. One. One. Wait, so Theo, I honestly think the three of us, if we had a fucking OnlyFans, who do you think would be the best OnlyFans? Who do you think would make the most out of OnlyFans? The three of us. Probably Theo's ass, though.

I don't know, though. It depends what you were doing. I think Theo has the... Could. I think Theo could. I think... I don't know, though. In a thong? It depends what you were doing. Theo glazed up hands? I think Theo has the... Could. I think Theo could. I think... I don't know. I don't think I would do it, man.

Yeah, well, none of us would. Yeah. I could see one of y'all doing it easily. You guys will do anything. No. No, I don't think so, dude. No, I would do OnlyFans, but I wouldn't show fucking my... Well, there you go.

So that's one of you that's already done. And if you'll do it, then Brendan will definitely do it. Chris is in on it, and then we'll talk you into it, and then here we are. God, Theo would be so like, I don't know, man, if I'm going to post this and that. I don't want to be on OnlyFans, dude. The last thing I want to keep to myself is my freaking nuts and b-hole, you idiot. I'm sorry, my bad.

No, dude, Theo would be like, hey, he'd call you and you'd be like, what's up? And he'd be like, did you show your abs

on OnlyFans or what? I'm like, he's going to overthink everything. Yeah, you show your abs. Yeah, I don't know, man.

I know a lot of guys show their abs and stuff. You have a conversation about showing abs for 20 minutes and then he wouldn't do it. Yeah, you guys are obviously

a couple of freaking local cum hunters, bubby, and I'm not, all right? Praise God. I have cum just so I know where it is. I've seen the stuff you guys put out there. So I think Brendan would probably have the number one OnlyFans, though, if he was showing skin. If he was showing skin, Brendan.

Come on. Best body. I don't even try to be shitty, though. Best body? Come on, dude. You got a thick body. Yeah, dude. Come on, dude. Get Boston in a little thong diaper and put his little ass out there to be shitty, though. That body? Come on, Dad. You got a thick body. Yeah, dude. Come on, Theo.

Get Boston in a little thong diaper and put his little ass outside. All right, man. All right, dude. Three, dude. He's two. Yeah. Is he? Yeah, bro.

He emails me. Be cool, man. Well, he's emailing. I'll tell you what. I'm not trying to be weird, though, but one of the number one things on you porn is mommy porn, so I think Theo and his mom would crush it on only fans i'm just spitballing ideas here nobody's listening yeah true what about you if you and your brother teamed up dude and teamed up in what way dude we'll call it the delias

the delia what like only fans and you guys are in thongs and like just wrestling i don't know no i don't want to wrestle my brother in thongs, dude. How weird would that be, bro? What if I could guarantee three mil? Guys, we have one black dude who listens to the show. He's trying to send in a video right now. That's a fair point. We have one black fan. That's a fair point.

How do we split the three mil? Okay, let's do the dude. Here we go. 80-20 you. Hey, guys. What's up? It's Deshaun from Dane, Ohio. Nice. Tired of seeing all those white boys posts. So you've been- There we go. 80-20 you. Hey, guys. What's up? It's Deshawn from Dane, Ohio. Nice.

Tired of seeing all those white boys posts. All you family. There we go, baby. Thank you, man. I have the strangest thing for you guys. Driving a car without any catalytic converters. You know, I've seen you guys talking about it, and I want to know what you guys think. Woo!

Yay! Is that the Batmobile? God damn. Good, good, good, good. Turn mine down. Is that the new Batmobile? That thing sounds lit. My buddy Mark got his catalytic converter

stolen in LA, and his Prius sounds like a goddamn Thunderbird now. Yeah. So it's louder when you get the catalytic converter ticking? Oh, yeah. A lot of people do it on purpose. Oh, really? It's called pipes, daddy. Alright, but you said stolen instead of

stolen. Stolen. Stolen, dude. Oh, you're in English? Oh, are you Miss Decker from Overland High School? Oh, hi, dude. Oh, hi, Miss Decker. Theo said stolen. I said stolen. Dude, I, dude. Oh, hi, Miss Decker. Theo said Stoling. I said Stoling.

All right, dude. I know. I've bond-aw. Okay? What I'm saying is this, bro. Yes, if you ain't got that catalytic converter, you running that cancer gun, baby. You shooting basically just straight engine smoke right out into the world. Yeah.

Suck on that, Al Gore. You feel me? Gretchen. How about this Prius? Sounds like a goddamn Dodge Ram. Hemming. So people do it on purpose? Yeah, so it sounds loud as shit.

Now, you're not going to pass your smog test or emissions, but you sound cool for a little bit. Do you have kind of a living room? And a lot of times, yeah. Yeah, yeah. At Civil War reenactments, a lot of times they would have a couple of them off to the side, and people would floor them every now and then during the big gunfights as well.

Sounds fun. Facts. That makes sense because they had cars back then. But it's so loud, it's insanely loud. People do it on purpose, but also it's a real problem in L.A. People are stealing Cadillac converters. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Stealing to what?

Sell them for other cars? I don't know what they do with them. I don't know what the fuck. Bong them out, probably. I feel like Chin might have went down that dark road. Chin, you ever steal on a Cadillac converter? No, but I did take my Cadillac converter off when I used to street race. Wow, dude.

I knew it. Yeah. You used to street race? Yeah. Oh, you don't know Chin's past life. Yeah, he did, bro. He was in a gang. Have you seen him?

I wasn't in a gang. So you like Fast and Furious? We started building our cars way before that movie came out. Yeah, I understand that, but you were into that movie, though? Just because they had import cars, not domestic. On Chin's MySpace, he had the quote that said, I live my life 140 miles at a time. Wow.

Huge Vin Diesel fan. Chin's the biggest Vin Diesel fan. Seen all the movies. Seen that one where he's fucking- In Tokyo with Little Bow Wow? That's Chin's favorite movie? No, The Pacifier where he's the nanny. I did watch that.

I did. No. I'm not kidding. I was a huge Vin Diesel fan. Spring Roll Back? Is that it? You caught me, dude. You're good.

I got it. Fuck yeah, dude. That movie's awful. Let's take a little break from the program. And while you're taking a break, go watch my new special, The Gringo Poppy, on Thick Boy YouTube. It's out right now. Enjoy, friends.

I worked hard. 30 minutes of lighting up my Latina family. Go watch it with a bag of Flaming Hot Doritos. But listen, if you're listening to this show right now, The King, The Sting, and The Wing, all right, if you're listening to this podcast, our goal is to create the best overall show experience possible. We would appreciate feedback about the show and the chance to learn a bit more about you, the listener, our fans. We love you guys. We are asking you guys to complete a short survey that takes less than five minutes.

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Also, Vin Diesel's Instagram is fantastic. The best. He's out of... He's the best. I saw pretty much all the movies. I think you're the biggest fan. We called it. Wow, dude. Exposed. He's the best. I saw pretty much all the movies. I think he was the biggest fan. We called it. Wow, dude.

Exposed. It's true. It's true, dude. I never knew really who was a Vin Diesel fan in America. I thought Vin Diesel fans were mostly European. I didn't know there were actual American Vin Diesel fans. 78 million followers doing something right. Yeah, he's loved.

No, no, no. A lot of prison men, too. He no. A lot of prison men, too. He is. A lot of prison men love him. That's a good point. He's got a great unaware Instagram. Yes, he does. What's up with unaware people on fucking social media?

Nothing better. Celebrities, I don't get it, dude. Nothing better. Vin Diesel and who else is like that? Unaware, just unaware how they're being I mean look at him imagine taking that picture let me take a kneel and his wife's like let me get this shot babe

Theo you see this his wife can you see him taking a can you see him doing the Colin Kaepernick on the fucking beach right now I can see this dude with a black heart is the caption. You can't see this, but his pants are pulled down a little bit

and he's softly thumbing his fucking dick with his right hand. 1.6 million likes. That's crazy. That's how he jerks off at the beach right there with the low tide. He's doing better than us, man. His videos are so great. He's on a yacht. He's doing better than us, man. His videos are so great. He's on like a yacht.

He's on a fucking private jet. He's like, I'm just so grateful for everybody. That ain't a private jet, dude. That's a damn quad, bro. And that looks like Costa Rica. That's a rental. That's a rental. Yeah, you might be right.

No, he could buy that. Oh yeah, he's almost a billionaire. But he didn't that day. He rented that bitch. All right. Deshawn, baby, Deshawn. Thank you, Deshawn, for being black and for liking us. First of all. In no particular order.

And I want to be honest about that. Today, we're like the new Abercrombie, dude. We used to be all white. Now we got to mix it up. Used to be cool to be white. It's not cool to be white anymore, dude. No, hell no. This guy's got a cover he wants to play for us.

The video's a minute 20, so let me know when you want me to hit the gong. Okay. What's up, boys? Theo, Brandon, Chris, hopefully Eric's there too, Chin, and Nick. So, yeah, you guys are super influential on me. First with the Breathe Right strips a couple weeks ago. Oh, yeah. I love this guy.

He had a video, right? He mentioned Morgan Whalen, and I've been into him. He's fucking good. He's the best. Check out this little cover I did. See what you guys think. How was y'all? Okay, let's pull it up.

Feels like he's not in studio. I'd grab your little ass right now, dog. Cozy up, bitch. Honestly, that's great. I'll punch you, you creep. He just started listening to Morgan. I'm sorry, Waylon? Wallen.

Wallen. He said it wrong. Oh, I should never look at Brendan to see how to pronounce something. Well, I was just saying how he said it. Okay, okay. So you guys sounded cool, but yeah. So he just started listening to him, and now he can do that? Yeah, dude.

And clearly he's on the set of Jurassic Park 7. Yeah, that's crazy, bro. Play this song. That's Jurassic Park. Oh, yeah. Yeah. And then let me just, because I can't sing, I'll be the T-Rex. Way too loud, way too loud in my earphones.

How do I make him go down? You are number one. Okay. Thank you very much. Well, he's number two in our hearts. I am very much. Well, he's number two in our hearts. I am, aren't I? He's number two in our hearts. You're two.

You're two. Oh, I turned so much. It's hard to tell on my audio here if it was good or not. It was. He was good. He kind of nailed it, dude. It was good. Chin?

Yeah. He was decent, for sure. He was like a mother. That's what I thought. I thought he was decent. I think he's a nice guy. I'm glad he's got the breathe right strips in his brain. He's getting more air into his brain.

Bro, I need breathe right strips right now, dude. I need them so... Do you have some? You know what fixes... Go get them. I know, but I noticed, Theo, you doing the thing where you just pull the side of your face a little bit. Yeah.

Right, that. And I noticed you doing that, and I did that the other day, and boy, does it help. Oh, my God. I think, Theo and. And I did that the other day. And boy, does it help? Oh my God. I think, I think Theo and Brendan, I think what we should do is I think, no,

I think breathe right. Strips are not the way to go. Now just hear me out, dude. They do work, but man, if we, you know how like sunglasses have that fucking strip that you can like put around so they

don't fall. Dude, if you had breathe right strips, think about coming from the back, like, and pulling your cheeks out to the side. It's called a facelift. Do you understand what I'm saying? Like a facelift Breathe Right strip?

Dude, that would be the move. Like King the Thing in the Wing Breathe Right face straps? Yeah. We can barely sell the mugs that we have, dude. Do we have mugs? We can barely sell the... We can't do it. I don't think we can. Oh, we got some fireworks dropping too.

No deal. You don't know. I guess we could do something. Maybe if you had a special, where would it hook around the back of your head? I don't know. That's the thing, but that's,

but what we could do is go to, we could get funding from, we could go to shark tank. Dude, that's so something a shark tank would be like sharks. Are you tired of using breathe right strips? And then you peel them off your nose. You don't even have to peel shit off this time.

Yeah. You just leave it. They just come from the back. It could be magnetic or some shit oh if we could just cut our face open we could breathe so much better i think i know but then you got to do surgery are you going to do the surgery theo oh yeah he's doing it uh no i've are i don't know what they would do i mean the problem is they went in there one time with this little jack hammer and uh and it didn't help so the surgery takes a long time to

get it takes it like yeah it takes a long time to heal up from too i know it's awful i've had a nose job i had my nose shattered and then i can't breathe ever since i had um i had a read or read i went to a guy that said uh he was going to do it he's like you you have like one of your passageways are just totally fucked up and he was going to fix it and i never went back now did you go all right well i'm under can't take a little bit off the top no dude i would He's like, you have like one of your passageways are just totally fucked up and he was going to fix it. And I never went back. Now, did you go, all right, well, I'm under, can you take a little bit off the top? No, dude, I would never get a nose job, dude. I would never get a nose job.

I'm just two for one, you and Theo. Theo gets that bell pepper. Yeah, but Theo's nose fits his face. Does it? We would merge noses. Maybe if we had a merged nose. I think my nose is big, but. I mean, nobody's getting invited to a cocaine party here. Yeah. We all get snozzies.

Sniff it all up. I'm done. I'm definitely... Part of my nose is just cocaine inside of it. Well... Still. What do you think you are out of 10, Theo? If Kid Rock's a 10, he's a 4. Kid Rock is not a 10. On what scale is it?

Handsomeness. Oh. Oh, I'm an eight. Oh, no, no, no, no. Okay, what do you think? I'm strong. No, no, no, no. All right, so what do you think?

Come on. It's Honest Thursday at King's Ding. Okay, so what are you then? My nose? No, you, period. Oh, overall? Overall. In L.A.?

Yeah. In L.A., I'm a six? Nah, you're better than that. Theo's a seven in Nashville? Yeah, but he's fishing for compliments by saying that. No, I'm not. I think I'm a six. Anywhere I am.

I'm so big. Theo's a four in L.A., and he's a seven in Nashville. Okay. Theo, what do you think about that? No? That's unbelievable. First of all, why you would ask this man anything to do with numbers

blows my mind and yeah I'm an 8 anywhere I go guys nice I don't even know

what we're talking about the personnel now we're just saying based off just looks not your career not success just straight up looks

not your personality right right looks straight up looks yeah you're a 5 dude that's that is I'm tall though, dude.

If you're tall, you're not a five. I'm not fucking ugly, dude. If you're tall and a five, you're ugly, dude. Hey, hey, hold on. You think you're handsome? No, I'm just saying I'm not a five, dude. I know, but you think you're handsome? Well, we've already, there's something about me.

And it's not about, it's not the looks. It's something about me. No, no the looks. It's something about me. No, no. Sure. Both of you. Take that out of this equation. Don't put me in this. You already called me a four, buddy.

I'm above a five, bro. Dude, if Fashion Nova's looking for models, you think they're calling anybody here? Well, they might call you, dude, because you look. They have a lot of urban models, so they might call you. Fair point. What else you got, Nick? He thinks anybody who brushes their teeth can be an eight. I agree. As long as you brush your teeth and take care of yourself, you can be an eight. That's childhood drama, dude. Here's a guy right here.

Here's an eight. Columbus, Ohio. I'm 30 years old. I got a Kingers singer for you. My girlfriend is almost 29 years old, and her parents track her location. Doesn't matter where she is. What? It's weird. I find it a little odd. I've been with her for over four years. So King or a Stinger.

Should I kick her to the curb, or should I stay with her? Eric, huge fan. Goddamn, Bill. You made Workaholics what it is. Brandon Theo, love you guys. Chris, congratulations. You've got me through the darkest times of my day, bro. Brandon Theo, love you guys. Chris, congratulations. You've got me through the darkest times of my day, bro. Love you, bro.

You're a legend. King or Stingit, should your girl have her location tracked at age 29, bro? Gang gang, buzz buzz, soar. Love that, dude. That's nice. Thank you for saying that. Beautiful young man. Sorry about your dark times, dude, but you got through them, didn't you?

And there may be more ahead, but just remember you'll get through those as well. I'll guarantee there's more ahead. Yeah, okay. Well, let's be positive. There may be more ahead. I like to be realistic, though. But he is going to get through them. God damn it, dude.

He's going to get through them, all right? Yeah. Have some confidence in the guy, Brendan. No, I do. I'm just realistic. The water's going to get a little more choppy down the road. You're going to tell him he's a four right now? No.

I want you to lift his spirits up a little bub all right he's a nine listen he is uh it is very very weird that parents would have somebody who's 29 share their location with them but i don't think it is these days but but for females it's a little different because they get abducted and shit you know so i understand that but the question he's asking is should he kick her to the curb because of it and the answer for that is no but you should definitely have a fucking conversation definitely have a conversation but i can understand 29 female if she's going to mexico pretty often they're kidnapping left and right and also, if they're looking at your heart rate, and it's 1 a.m. and your heart rate's through the roof, you ain't doing freaking, you know, the Peloton.

You're sucking dick. You feel me? So we don't want the parents knowing that. You could look at the heart rate? Yeah, dude. Yeah, bro. You suck. Sweetheart, are you sucking dick?

The parents? Yeah, and they don't want that. So I kind of understand. That's that heart rate. Yeah. Or you could be eating a bag of those Takis, too. You don't know what people are doing, Brendan. But you got to check in is the point.

But I'm saying somebody could be dabbing up a bag of Takis that they got somewhere at a late night station or something. They don't have to be doing oral. That's a fair point, too. So suck a dick or Takis? I mean, out of the three of us, who would get more likely to be kidnapped? Probably Theo, right? Because, you know. I guess.

Like, you know, Van, Theo. His backside, and then also. Like, man, is there rugs in there? And then fucking he's gone. And then he'd call us, and he'd be like, when y'all guys ever get kidnapped, what do you do? Love you, bro. Yeah, but then you guys would go get kidnapped to be just like me so anybody want us here's what i say you you i think as a parent you have every right to

track your child as long as you want to track him my buddy got a bj a little bit of oral back in the day from a girl who wore uh her parents had a dang, one of those dog tracing necklaces on her. Oh. And look, people do what they do to take care of their child. If you have already lost one child, you might want to double down on the second one and get them collared up or get a,

you know, even get a special back brace that may have an alert pod on it. People do all types of stuff to take care of their child, especially if it's a female. Females get abducted all the time. Look that up, please, Chen. No, we pretty much know that that's true, but you can also put the Apple tag in your anus. Oh, that's another good point.

You can get the fake one from Amazon. I think it's like six bucks. Oh, really? Yeah. And just go through them. If the asshole swallows it, you just double down. Just have a stack of them. I need to get a bunch of Apple.

My OCD is crazy, dude. I would want to get a bunch of Apple things and just put them everywhere. Like I have them all on my keys. Do you have them? No. You don't lose your keys, bro? No. Because I'm, you know why?

Bullshit. Because I'm 39. I don't lose keys. You go, where is it? Never. Oh, come on, bro. Unreal. The other day, I forgot where I put my keys and was like, well, CT, here we go.

See? So now you need to get your Apple tags. You got Apple tags, Theo? Absolutely not. No. No, I don't have that. I put my keys on a table. It's not a full table.

It's a semi-table, basically, a quarter, like an eighth of a table. I put my keys on there. Sometimes I don't put them on there and that's when it gets harrowing for me. I don't like losing my keys. Yeah. Nothing. But I've also, you can get into my truck without any keys and you can even start. Oh, you got the numbers thing.

Wow. Look at that. I used a wrench on it or a screwdriver because I got so tired of not having my keys in it. Wow. Nick, you're really mixing it up today. I see what you're doing. What'd you watch, that doc? White Hot? I think it's Eric. We've got fucking Chameleon Air here. What's up, brothers?

Nick, Chen, Meat Stick, Cat's Toes, Brendan, Theo, Chris, Eric and his glasses. Nerd! Nice. We've got a thing a few today sitting out here you know in my car making a video for nick's a little kink ass to tesla as you can see uh elon buying twitter king of the sting it that's someone that uses twitter a lot i'm not mad at it i think he's better than most people for free speech. But he's also a rich guy. And I fucking hate rich guys.

So I can't just sting it. Shout out to all you. Gang gang. Buzz buzz. Baka! Nice. I like that guy. He's funny. I like that guy. He's funny. I'm going to say, look, man, first of all, yes, I like Elon getting Twitter. The place is just a real...

It's a pretty alt-left cesshole. Yeah, for sure. So I'm excited for hopefully that finds some way to even out. And I think it just feels like, yeah, I guess it is scary, though, because he is a rich guy and who knows what some of his motives are. He hasn't come out with that Cybertruck either. He's been saying that for a while. Yeah, I'm glad he has it though.

Yeah, me too. I'm glad he has Twitter. I'm glad he has it, but also as far as free speech goes, it's also Elon's not going to be running this thing. He has a team. I want free speech. Don't silence anybody. Bring back not only left, but right people.

Whoever got canceled for saying misinformation they're back it's a good thing man but he's not it's not like he's gonna be monitoring every fucking day he has a team dude come on i know he's too rich for that yeah making something really awesome making something really big like this private is a huge step into like i mean that it is crazy that this is the most global app and it's going to be a private company owning it that's crazy dude that is crazy i think it's a private before well yeah but it was a public company public in their shares and and and they were they were for sure like suppressing and like uh you know it likeleft. But man, it's going to be fucking wild.

I don't know. I don't fucking do Twitter, but it's so crazy that this is going to be happening. And I guess it's a good thing. I guess it's a good thing. No, it is a good thing. You need somebody in the middle. Obviously, Elon's not far left or far right. He's in the middle, so you're going to get all the info, man.

You're not going to silence people who don't agree with your opinion. People are going to have actual debates on there. Now, hopefully it's not the Wild West where he's like, anything goes. And fucking ISIS is on there, the cartel and shit like that, but he's going to have a team, and it's going to be ran well. Like, Elon, he doesn't fucking miss.

He's never failed. So if he puts his attention, his team, to this, it's going to be lit, dude. Yeah. It's going to be lit. ISIS, hopefully. ISIS has been on there. ISIS has been on there, Brendan.

Not anymore, dude. They got taken down? Yeah, man. No, there's some ISIS still on there, people are saying. You think ISIS is like, fuck yeah, Elon Musk. Yeah. We got it. We're going to get our country reinstated.

Yes. I think Trump's pretty. I'm sure they are. Yeah. And look, let them back in. I think it's a Royal Rumble. Let everybody in that bitch, dude. I don't know if that's good.

Fucking Trump. Cindy Lauper. Let everybody in that bastard, dude. Whoever. Anybody. Dude, Trump roasting ISIS? Frederick Douglass, let him in that bitch. Trump roasting ISIS?

You know how lit that's going to be? Yeah, but Trump isn't going to go back on Twitter, he said. I guarantee he does. Now, On Twitter he said I guarantee he does Now Elon has it I bet I guarantee he does Cause his app Was a nightmare

Well he said That he's not going to Because he's gonna do His app I mean Alright that's what He said I don't know That's like CNN Plus

It lasted 10 days I'm real current And I know that shit Okay whatever dude What else you got Nick This guy's got He starts his submission Off with a song

And you wanna listen To the lyrics Cause it's about Tonto Vaughn. Okay. A lot of beautiful music out there. I fly on an eagle's back to see my son. As long as it's just one eagle and not two eagles. Whoa.

And we be on the reservation with open eyes and a pair of tubes. I'd fly on an eagle's back to see my son. What is that, Brendan Urie? What's up, guys? I love your stuff. King it or sting it, musicians want to be comedians. Comedians want to be musicians. Gang, gang, buzz, buzz.

Dude, that guy sang good. Yeah was good was it good it's tough to tell no it was good i mean so much sound a win like that's the only problem but he was good no here's let me just say just i don't fucking understand that this i don't understand people doing something and then wanting to secretly do something else. Just do the thing you want to do. Well, I get you, but sometimes... That's it, dude! Yes, next one!

But you did take singing lessons, you know, and you sing all the time. When I was figuring it out, I'm a comedian, bro. I'm not going out and doing concerts. No, but I'm not, though. It's all comedic. Yeah, but pick a lane, though. It's comedic. I'm not going out and doing shows. I'm not going out and you're a rapper though no but i'm not though it's all comedic yeah but pick a lane though it's comedic i'm not going out and doing shows i'm not going out and being like you know what i mean and and actually singing i do comedy that's what i do because that's what i want to do but i'm assuming when he says like singers want to be comedians

like who is he referring to ti like who else is there you must be talking to ti um no there's been some other ones i'm sure there has been some other ones, I'm sure. There has been some other ones. Maybe he's throwing shade at the new Thick Boy album that drops on Thursday featuring Mike Studd, Burt Kreischer, Chris D'Elia, Eric Griffin. Is Chris D'Elia going to be in Phoenix on Saturday? I think so. That's crazy. And he's friends with Theo who got the second show at the Wiltern.

Yeah, dude. And then Theo's also best friends with the guy who just dropped a special on YouTube. Oh! 30 minutes lighting up my Latin family. So that's fun. A lot of activity going on out there, guys, on the interweb. Oh, yeah. I'll say this.

What's this guy's problem? King it or sting it, musicians wanting to be comedians. Well, it's interesting because I think musicians get kind of lucky because they get that part in their performance in between songs where if they want to try material or try something new or novel that they can. We don't get that part where i could break out a little uh you know a little harp or something and do something i guess unless i have that skill set but people aren't going to hang on for a long time to a listen to me practice a tune yeah then

you're a hack though if you're doing that you know what i mean depends josh wolf does it does it pretty well he brings the guitar on stage i'm saying love Josh Wolfe, but comedians look down on that. Oh, for sure. Yeah, yeah. But I mean, Chris. Go ahead, Theo. Who does it? Mark Eddy does it. You know,

some people have done it. I don't know. Is it a hacky thing to have a... I don't give a fuck at all. It depends how good you are at it. Also, if you're selling tickets because you're playing the fucking flute halfway through your act,

I don't give a fuck. Well, look, Bo Burnham. I mean, he's a genius. He give a fuck. Well, look at Bo Burnham. I mean, that dude, he's a genius. He's a monster. Super creative. But is he just a comedian? That's an interesting question. I think Bo is more than a comedian,

which is a good thing. He's a great actor, too. Oh, Nick Toon's good. Nick Toon, yeah. He's great. Well, does he do that still, though? I think Nick just does... Last time I saw him, I don't think he had his guitar. Yeah, I think it's just musical. At that point, it's just a different version. I mean, there's so many versions of it.

Some people do wheelchair comedy. People do musical comedy. People do, you know, there's a guy that was in a fire or something. He does, you know, I'm not fire comedy, but, you know, people do all type of different comedy. Fire comedy? Dude, my boy type of different comedy. Fire comedy? Dude, my boy went- Or whatever, aloe comedy or whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah, scarred comedy.

Aloe vera comedy. My boy went to go see J. Cole and he did 30 minutes of new material and just bombed. And it was like- Wait, what do you mean new material? New songs? No. J. Cole? He was trying to do standup halfway through the fucking concert.

J. Cole? J. Cole. What? Derek Poston went and was like, yeah, he was trying to do stand-up halfway through the fucking jay cole jay cole what derrick poston went and was like yeah he was like trying these jokes it ate shit what and then he was like hit the beat and just that was his out he's like oh this is going terrible oh whoa went to the back to rapping yeah bro maybe he's just fucking maybe he's just bored yeah maybe he's like fuck this dude i'm gonna mix it up i'm sick of singing the same goddamn songs. Yeah, no, you'll never see me seriously singing or anything like that. Ever. Ever.

You sing on every King's thing, but I hear you. But not seriously, though. I know I'm good. Yeah, but you did a whole album, Chank Smith, which also, cover your ears, Chan. I'll say the title again. All right. It's a joke, but I understand, dude. If people take it real, then they take it real, dude. If it gets you through hard times, it gets you through hard times. It's a joke, but I understand, dude. If people take it

real, then they take it real, dude. If it gets you through hard times, it gets you through hard times. That's all I'm saying.

You float pretty hard on the Thick Boy album, making fun of King the Sting in the Wing, fucking After Dark. Yeah, well, I

mean, hey, dude, if you want to take it seriously, take it seriously, but it's a joke. That's crazy. Let's see what's up with Nanny

from Servant. Hey, King the Sting in the wing my name is grace i'm an er nurse from midland michigan and i got a debate club for you guys so my husband and i've been watching you guys forever you know especially chris since uh i don't know since we were in high school no offense guys 23 years old my husband and i have been together since we were in high school wow No offense, guys. I'm 23 years old. My husband and I have been together since we were in high school. Wow. And we've been married for the past two years. Cute.

And it's like our parents are constantly asking us, when are you going to have kids? Sure. When are we going to have grandkids? And so, want your opinion on that. I know Chris has a beautiful baby boy. Fuck yeah, dude. And he'll have kids. Theo, you'd be a great dad one day.

That's in your future. So, yeah. yeah you have kids theo you'd be a great dad one day that's in your future um so yeah waiting to have kids should you wait and spend more time with your partner get to know each other more um vacation together stuff like that or jump into having kids so sounds like you've known your man since he was eight buzz buzz sore cute yeah i mean dude you know like it's i mean there's no rush if you want to do it do it but here's the 23 bro where does she live though you know what i mean in la that's fucking young as shit but if she oh it's young even if you're in brazil i mean 23 dude girl don't do that 23 is only 23 no matter where you are yep Yep. Yeah, no, I know, but I'm saying in LA, people will be like, oh, you got married and you're 50? That's young. You know what I mean?

Yeah, but kids are like such- Yeah, but those people are creeps probably. Okay. But it's like such a responsibility. Like, I'm glad I had kids later in life, so I was able to just live. Oh, I am too. Yeah, I am too. Because it's locking you down.

Chris, this lady does not need any kids. This lady does not need any kids right now. Her and her husband should go to places. Yosemite. That's it, really. Boston. Six flags. Six flags.

Elitch Gardens. Denver. Everywhere. Maine. Go somewhere with your family, lady. Have a good time. I think you don't jump right into it. She doesn't have a family.

You could do kids at 25, 26. She has a husband, but they don't have no children. That's not a family. Well, it's the start of one, dude. I say a husband, but they don't have no children. That's not a family. Well, it's the start of one, dude. I say do not have a family yet. She wants to go with her. So you go with your parents? Go somewhere with your family as your parents?

This is what I think about this video. The problem is, shut the fuck up everyone else trying to fucking tell her, are you going to have kids? Well. No, period. It's so annoying. But she's asking. That's what she's asking. to have kids? Well. No, period. It's so annoying. But she's asking. That's what she's asking.

No, no, no, no, no. She's getting some pressure. But she's saying people are pressuring her and asking her. That's the annoying thing. You got to set some boundaries, baby. You got to set boundaries, dude. You got to set boundaries. Who's he talking to?

Yeah, who's he clapping to? I have an imaginary church here. Nick's clapping. But dude, you have to clapping to I have an imaginary church here Nick's clapping but dude you have to you can't see it but Nick's clapping Nick's got

Nick's shooting his shirt around like a helicopter dude you Nick has a foam finger she has to say mom dad I'll have kids when I want to and then go like this

and do a spin move and leave that's what she has to do she probably lives with them and they're like alright see you for dinner bitch you know what I'm saying? But then also, 23,

dude, like girl, you gotta start. I would wait to at least 28. Five years, just grind it, get your career going and then have those little critters. Just a lot, man. Yeah, I think you can definitely I'd put that womb away, you know, for a bit. I'd back

that womb off the front lines. Back that womb away for a bit. I'd back that womb off the front lines. Back that womb up. Are you a fine motherfucker? Why don't you back that womb up? Wheel that bitch out after winter or something. I would at least enjoy the summer, though. Yeah. You don't want to be pregnant in the summer.

You don't want to be out there in your body just making milk all summer in the heat and shit. You just hot milk. I'd say hold off. That's a good point. Hold off, baby. Just making milk, squeezing milk out in the summer. Anybody want milk? Warm milk.

Clearly this guy's like. Well, that's a thing. This guy's the mascot of Coachella, huh? Wow. Your wife turns into a damn dairy section right after she drops that deal, you know? Yeah, this guy is. Is he at Coachella? That's Brendan, isn't it?

What's going on, whoever you got in the studio today? King in the sting. My name's Sloan. I'm from Halifax, Nova Scotia. Wow. I'm currently in Theo's Daddy's in Necla Woods, Nicaragua. Wow. Ooh.

Viva. My question for you guys today is backpacking. What's your thoughts on it? Would you rather travel luxury? Would you rather backpack? And if you guys kind of go back in time and like not be famous, would you prefer luxury? Would you prefer backpacking?

That's my question for you guys today. Gang, gang, buzz, buzz. Say it, say it, say it. Oh, what's he gonna do oh oh oh shotgun oh the way he did it the way he did it so smooth the way he did it a little yeah that fucking jorge masvidal here's what i think dude i i'm not saying this as definitive, but the larger percent of people who go backpacking, the larger percent of people who go backpacking don't know who they are.

Yeah, they're looking for it. And they're literally out backpacking. They always say these, I got to go out and find myself. Bro, bitch, you're right there. And guess who backpacked? No. That guy. No. And he was lost out of the three of us.

But I'm saying, Theo, you could agree to this. The larger percentage of people who backpack don't know who they are inside. Now, I will say this. If I'm going to backpack with someone, Theo's a good partner. He'd be a good guy to go with. He carries snacks. He has stories. He likes granola bars.

You know what I'm saying? Back off, dude. You guys, here's what happens is, there's guys in the world who don't go backpack, who are afraid to go out there and do something like that, and then they talk shit about people that do it, and those guys are you guys, okay? You guys have never backpacked.

The furthest place you backpack is to a coffee bean probably chris fuck yeah dude brendan needs a backpack to get through the alphabet so the truth is that you guys have never done it dude i think it's legendary dude i remember falling asleep somewhere wet the bed it dripped onto a larger woman who was sleeping under me in a hostel. Yeah, why don't we ask that woman about how backpacking is. She's going to be like, it sucks. Guys pee on you.

Yeah, it sucks. Some random dude pissed on me in the middle of the night. He wouldn't stop telling me fucking stories from his childhood, and then he pissed all over me. He named 19 friends from his childhood. Free piss. Welcome to free piss. Alright? That lady needs to tighten up, dude. I'm just saying, man,

insane stuff can happen when you go backpacking. I think it's a real adventure. Deal. Where did you... There's a difference between backpacking in the United States and then doing it in foreign land. If you're lost, you're lost. No, but if you're in fucking Mexico going through some

random fucking part you know it's like you got them yeah you get cool stories sure portugal uh yosemite lisbon lisbon yosemite uh everywhere england london uh germany uh you don't know who you are dude south africa find peace you don't know who you are bro South Africa Still didn't find peace You don't know who you are You don't know who you are You're looking for yourself

Go out there looking for you Dude I go backpacking To the coffee bean It's awesome dude I go to the coffee bean I'm just like Hey do you know where Where can I find

I'm just asking people shit Yeah I backpack at the mall Okay Which way to the waterfalls Yeah Where's the cinema I think you gotta get out there and do it. And that guy's having a great time.

He's got a sweet pad there. He's obviously going to meet some. But that guy's not backpacking. He was in a luxurious place. That guy's in some fucking $9,000 a night Airbnb. And had fun on the bottom of his pool. Yeah, that's fucking Escobar's grandson. He's asking us about backpacking.

He's drinking a Bud Light. You're not backpacking if you're drinking beer. Oh, cool. It's Shane Gillis. What's he want? What up, Theo, Brendan, Eric, Chris? My name's Keith. I'm from Long Island, New York.

I got a debate club for you guys. Wow, so New York. So my wife and I recently purchased this house. It is a fixer-upper, and we're planning on doing most of the work ourselves. Oh, my God. So my debate club is Home Depot or Lowe's for your go-to home improvement needs. Oh, come on. Now, Chris, I know Home Depot and Lowe's are the places poor people go when they can't afford somebody else to fix their shit.

So this might be for Theo, Brendan, and Eric. Fair point. But Gang Gang, Buzz Buzz, Soar, Home Depot or Lowe's? I don't even know, honestly, if Home Depot or Lowe's is a poor place or not. I've never fucking been anywhere near those places. Listen, dude. But I'm a real man. This one's easy.

It's fucking, that's Shane Gillis who's on keto. Listen, it's fucking Home Depot all day. Home Depot is lit. You think backpacking is dangerous, Theo? Go to Home Depot with the illegal immigrants looking for a job. They're jumping in your truck, your car, even if you don't invite them. They're down to make a fence for no fucking reason at a quality price. I'll give them that, dude.

They'll show up as Spider-Man, Hulk for your kid's birthday party. They're just looking for a gig, dude. It's the Wild West. You can get dope-ass hot dogs wrapped in bacon. They got churros. That's true. Yeah, dude. Home Depot is lit as fuck. Dope-ass hot dogs wrapped in bacon. They got churros. That's true. Yeah, dude.

Home Depot is lit as fuck. Go to Homo Depot, dude, where a lot of gay dudes are beating each other with two hot dogs. Get in. Get in. They're outside. Come on in. Get in his truck. Come on in. We got lumber.

We have lumber. Hop in. We have wood, daddy. They're all just on the fork. They're all on the forklift listening to ABBA. Dude, I'm telling you. Get in. That's the place we need and how sad is it that this zielinski guy has time now to make a video for bro this dude needs to fucking get off the internet and take care of his country jesus christ

i don't know man i think that like He does look a little bit like him. I think that it's. I like Home Depot, man. I don't know. I like Home Depot. They have gay men in there. Also, they let anybody work there. You could have. They had a Duke home to me with no eyes in there trying to help me.

Like, just unbelievable. They employ all types of people. People in a wheelchair. Somebody in a fish tank. Yep. Fellas. They'll employ. Oh, anybody in that.

Yeah. Dude, it's the greyhound of fucking department stores. Somebody in a fish tank. Yep. Fellas. They'll employ anybody in that. Yeah. Dude, it's the Greyhound of fucking department stores. It's so much fun. You got to have your head on swivel, though. It's basically like jail. LA County. You got to have your head on swivel. You get fucked there.

You can just pick up a nail gun and use that bitch in there. It's very avant-garde. Dude, you'll get shanked because they have tools in there. So you don't get shanked. I've been to Lowe's once. I've been to Lowe's a few times. I've been to Home Depot once. What's this guy?

King or Sting at butt chins. Whoa, dude. What's it like? This guy puts his face in the toilet to shit. Bro, this guy's chin, bro. He's got to fucking wipe his ass. Dude, he sneezes and wipes his ass at the same time. It's a Uriah Faber, man.

Unbelievable, dude. Farting out your chin, finger stinging. King in the sting. I don't know who's on the show today, but mainly question for B-Shob since you go to the gym. Me too.

This is Travis from Palm Beach, Florida, and I'm at the gym right now. So white. And a guy just walked by me with so much cologne, it startled me. Oh, dude. So I was thinking,

what's worse? Too much cologne or it startled me. Oh, dude. So I was thinking, what's worse? Too much cologne or bad BO? My preference is wear a hoodie, cover it up. Thanks, guys. Gang, gang, buzz, buzz. That boy's doing work on that. Say sore, but yeah, but say sore, but yeah. You forgot, though, you know?

Question for me, why don't you boys take a water break, right? Because the gym, right? The gym, so I'll take it from here. So when it comes to cologne, definitely not,'d rather have clone than bo dude bo what are you fucking andre or losky why do you smell like that can't wait to talk go ahead go ahead now you know do you have a gym membership can't wait to talk do you have a gym i do and i do the gym dude i'm stacked bro i look good okay my shoulders go crazy good yeah we all Bro, I look good. Okay? My shoulders go crazy. I look good. Yeah, we all look good. I look good.

Yeah. Well, not according to everybody. Yeah. No, I think you guys look cool. Brendan said you're a four. And that's, I think, personally, I'm going to go on record. I think that's disrespectful. I think you're higher than a four.

That's also semi-disrespectful. Right, but you're welcome for having your back a little bit, right? You can admit that. Okay. But what I'm saying is no. And I'm going to have the hot take here. What's the hot take? First of all.

Your perspective is Equinox, right? He's going to say it, Brendan. You go to Equinox. Well, where do you go, bro? Zoo culture, Gold's Gym. Real gyms, dude. Real gyms, Chris. All right.

All right. Gold's Gym. It has gold in the title of it. Yeah, dude. Rich, huh? Rich. Rich. Rich, no. Why don't you go to Diamond the title of it? Yeah, dude. Rich, huh? Rich. Yeah, rich. Rich, no.

Why don't you go to Diamond Gym or Mars Gym? Yeah, dude. Dude, Chris goes to Equinox. What? What about the World Bank of America gym, you idiot? Yeah, dude. Boo. Idiots.

What's your hot take, man? So my hot take is fucking BO over over cologne all day dude you're at the gym it's where you're supposed to have bo dude fuck i want to be on the stairmaster whatever the fuck i don't do that but like if you're on the stairmaster and you breathe in some aqua di giorgio you want to die i like the natural sense of everything i always want that i'm very french when it comes to this i want the natural scent of everything dude you think like i've i've been around people with BOI. I'm like, you know what?

Enjoy being you. Yeah, it's horrible, but enjoy being you. You try to cover that up with some bullshit. Hugo Boss, I'm not into it. But I also think you've been around. Go ahead. Yeah, you've been around rich BO. Yeah.

You've been around high dollar BO. You're talking about somebody raises their hand to get a waiter and you get a whiff of it. I'm talking about a different real-ass BO. Tell them about that backpacking BO when you're in fucking Guadalajara, Theo. All right? And they're eating beans all night, dude. Tell them about it. Oh, I'm talking about the stuff that has hair mixed in there with the scent.

You know what I'm saying? I'm talking about something that you got to blow your nose after you smell it. Yep. You know? I like it better than fucking cool water cologne. Oh, you're crazy. Especially at the gym. I think it's because you have that beak. I like it better than fucking cool water cologne. Especially at the gym. I think it's because you have that beak. I think your beak is real sensitive.

My shit's cool, man. I'll smell, yeah, maybe dude, but I'll smell that fucking BO all day long. I enjoy it. Yeah, Chris kind of looks like he's always smelling a fart or he's always trying to smell if somebody farted. I enjoy you the way you are. Don't cover that up. Come on. Male or female. You haven't smelled strong enough BO because you're not living the real world, dude. Bro, at 42, I've smelt strong enough

BO, dude. I honestly think it's your nose. But I would smell the BO more then. I know, but I think it's just the way your nose is built, like pointy like that, like the Despicable Me guy. Yeah, I am like that. Bring him up, Nick.

If they do live action, Broadway, Despicable Me, you got a job. like that. Bring him up, Nick. If they do live action Broadway Despicable Me, you got a job. I got to gain some weight, though. No, but you're the skinny version. You got a job. And Theo can play a minion, okay? You guys look exactly like them. Oh, well, there's Chris's nose. Oh, and both of y'all can play my nuts.

I don't think those are characters in that. Despicable me. Yeah, they are. There's some nuts in that. Yeah, they are, boo-boo. Who's this guy with his hat? It's way too big, right? This guy started the fire festival, right? This is your boy, Nut Johnson.

What's up? Josh here. I'm in Arkansas, so I have to keep my eyes peeled. Talk slower. I think Bryce Mitchell might jump out of these woods in any minute. Yeah, Boise Gator. Try to choke me out. Yeah, man.

Here's my king of the stinget. I mean, made that fishing pole. Yeah, fly fishing. Oh. Gay or not gay. It's so fucking frustrating sometimes. Slow game. I think it's kind of gay.

Wow. This is funny. This guy's great. As he's doing it, I think it's kind of gay. It's so slow and boring. You've got to wait forever, dude. This guy's obviously Chris D'Elia in Witness Protection. Even though he doesn't want to admit it.

And I think trying to catch a fly, I've never done fly fishing, and I believe in it, but it doesn't look like that man has a lot of joy, and it looks like he's out there by himself right now. Yeah, I don't think he has a lot of friends, but I also think fly fishing, you've got to be 60 or over, man. You chill in the water, knee up yeah you just sit there hoping a fish is stupid enough to think that your metal fucking yeah weird thing in the water is that actual fucking fly or what the hell they're trying to get he's just chilling he loves it look at me

yawning because fly fishing is boring yeah yeah dude be like our girl hannah be like hannah get get fucking elbow deep in a cat fish's mouth, dude, in the mud. Do that and be hot. I mean, even the movie about it is boring as fuck. River Runs Through It. Oh, I never watched that. I saw it. It's boring as shit. That looks so stupid. Yeah, go bait a gator, man. Maybe paint your arm up like

a cut of ham or a piece of bacon meat. Yeah, chum the water. Go bait a gator out there. Yeah, man. Get out there and be wild with it. I want to see that man do something. It's an older man's gig. It's definitely not gay, though. It's not gay. Yeah, it ain't gay, bro. The guy said it was gay.

People throw that around too often these days. Yeah. I mean, if you're 65 and you're doing it with another man, kind of gay. Let's say the three of us are old. We got nothing to do. Theo wants a backpack.

And I'm like, dude, why don't we just fly fish? Get an Airbnb, fly fish all day. Get a nice six pack of cold bears. Go back to the Airbnb. Oil each other up, okay? And go on OnlyFans. Full circle, dude. Leave me out of it. No, dude.

Grumpy old men. OnlyFans. Yeah, that's what I was thinking is that a lot of older men like to get out there and do that. I think if you got a nice rod and real, yeah, get out there and learn it. But I would be, while you can be younger and more active, I would do a more active style of poaching or catching. Yeah, maybe high knee in the water. Even regular fishing. And also heavy on the rod.

Am I right, Dale? No. Sorry. Nope. He's been, Dale? No. Sorry. No. He's been talking about nuts all goddamn day. I talk about a rod and it's too much? It's a little too much. All right.

All right. We got two more. Okay. What's up, guys? Vince from Forest Hill, Maryland. Of course your name's Vince. I have a king it or sting it for y'all. Be a name, Vince.

Designer breed pups. Oh, look at the dog. Our little guy is a golden retriever dachshund. We call him a golden wiener. Oh. Designer breed pups. Look at the dog. Dog's living in hell.

Gang, gang, buzz, buzz. He doesn't. Dog's living in hell. Shout out Riffin Griffin. Dog's living in hell because he's not supposed to be what it is. Designer breed pups are not supposed to be what they are. They have all sorts of medical problems. And this dog right now is like, I shouldn't even be this.

God didn't create that thing. Also, how long do you guys want to wait before we tell him that's a regular fucking Labrador retriever? And he paid 10 grand for a fucking Lab. I know. He got fucking hoodwinked. Yeah, that thing looks pretty basic. It's a cute dog.

I'll give you that. But that is not a high level dog. You got a regular dog. You got fucking taken for eight g's yep but here's a thing a lot of young men uh are buying dogs like this and are driving i had a friend who drove probably 170 miles to get a dog wow i get it though if the exact dog you want let's i'm looking for these hyper allergenic cats. It is a voyage. And Theo, if you just backpack your ass to fucking Indiana, that'd be great and pick up these cats for me.

Yeah, but if you're... Just spitballing ideas. I'll put both of you guys in a coffin, bro. God's backpack, dog. I'll put both of you hoes in a coffin. God's backpack? What else you got, Nick? Oh, God's jaw. Look at the guy's jaw. Hey, Brandon, Chris, Theo. Oh, Brandon!

Brandon, New York.. Oh, Brandon. I got a King It or Sting It for you guys today. First, just want to say, big fan of the podcast. Listen to it every day. Not quite as good as congratulations, but you guys are great. Every day? Oh, well, we know he's a liar off the bat. Ooh-wee. So the King It or Sting It today is working with family.

What's your guys' opinion on working with family? Currently, I am business partners with my stepfather here in Long Island. We've been operating a painting company for the past five years. Long Island. Really not the most conducive working relationship. We fight a lot. It's really

affected our personal relationship on many levels. Also, trickling down into my personal relationship with my mother. What I decided on many levels. Also, you know, trickling down into my personal relationship with my mother. Yeah. So, you know, what I decided to do was to get a new job at a different company. Great opportunity for me. He's at Home Depot. I thought everything would be fine.

It actually ended up blowing up. We're not speaking now. Oh, no. We're just, you know, it's actually become worse. Our relationship's become worse than it was when we were working together. I started a new job soon. So my whole opinion is, should I ever have gotten into business with family in the first place? So I'd love to hear what you guys have to say.

Working with family, king it or sting it? Sting it. But also, he needs a reality show. But it also sounds like your father-in-law is a complete dickhead. Well, we don't know his side of it, but yeah. Yeah, we're getting one side right now. We're getting one side of it, but honestly— He also lied at the top, right?

No, he didn't lie. He was very honest and very truthful, right? Because he said, congratulations, favorite podcast. We know it sounds better than this. That's what he said! But also, he said—here's the deal. The advice I would have given him is stop working with your stepfather if it's straining your relationship. That's what he said, here's the deal. I would have given, the advice I would have given him is stop working with your stepfather if it's straining your relationship.

That's what he said. And that is what he did. And then it got worse. That's what I'm saying. The step, the stepfather, the fucking father-in-law is a piece of shit. Could be. Yeah. Could be.

We don't know. He sounds. I've seen first 48 way too many times. This guy sounds like a good guy. But anyway. I agree. Hashtag good guy. Dude, my brother's my tour manager.

He's family. He's good at it. He makes some mistakes. If he wasn't family, I would fire him four years ago. But he's a brother, so give him some leeway. Family first, man. Well, yeah, but also

what's dope about him is what you can do is if your father-in-law wants to get all fresh with you, you can fight in the backyard at the barbecue. Nobody's pressing charges. Nobody's going to fire you either. There's that too. Dude, I think that you have to – if you're going to work with family, they have to be really tight. You have got to be really close.

So working with a stepfather is probably one of the hardest people to work with, honestly. But also working with friends. We're all friends. Friends is worse than family. And then when it gets, like, money and business, that shit sucks, man. Yeah, which I want to talk to you guys about that. You want to raise? Well, friends, I think if you get to work with your family, that's pretty neat. But, yeah, I think, yeah, you got to make sure that your family, that y'all are all dialed in.

A lot of times where I'm from, people will do snow cone stands together. The whole family will get in there. I like that. And yeah, and things like that, I think people can handle pretty well. But you start getting into some real more serious businesses. Yeah. I think it can get real risque kind of with family. I'd like to know what the business was before I give my full opinion.

OnlyFans. There you go. Drywall. Yeah. OnlyFans. Maybe it was a Home give my full opinion. OnlyFans. There you go. Drywall. Yeah. OnlyFans. Maybe it was a Home Depot situation. Stepdad OnlyFans. Yeah. Wetwall. I need more info, but I've seen First 48 way too many times. What does the First 48 have to do with this? I solve crimes, dude.

This is a crime. The dad's being mean to him. It's a crime, right? It's not a cold case because I solved it, right? Well, it's not a cold case because it's happening now, but yeah. It's also not a case. No, it's a crime. Oh, okay. Right? All right. It's not a cold case because I solved it, right? So be cool. Well, it's not a cold case because it's happening now, but yeah. It's also not a case. No, it's a case. All right. Okay.

Fair enough. Case solved. Is that it? That's it. Go watch my special. It's on YouTube right now. It's called Thick Boy, the Gringo Poppy. Go get you some, man.

And then the album also drops. Thick Boy on iTunes, Amazon, Spotify, wherever you listen to music. The full album is there. It is fantastic. Shout out to the Little Brows for putting this thing together. I will be in Charlotte May 5th through the 7th. You too. I love you guys.

Thank you for the support. You guys give me so much freaking motivation and support, man. I honestly love you guys. I don't tell you enough. I love you too, man. Saturday. I also don't drink water and have cavities, so I might die any day. Yeah, you're going to die.

Be cool. So Saturday, do in Phoenix. Fuck yeah, dude. I'll be in Phoenix Celebrity Theater. Go Chris Lee, Dr. Holland to get tickets and check out my podcast. Congratulations. Which that guy likes better than King of Sting. I'm just saying King of Sting.

Well, he has a lion, has an issue with his father-in-law. Theo, Wiltern, dude. You got another show, daddy? Yeah, happy to have a show over there at the Wiltern. That is on May 7 over there in Los Angeles as well. Then we got some shows in Albuquerque

and that is on May 18th, May 19th in Midland, Texas, Lubbock, Texas on the 20th and Dallas on May 21. We added a show there. And then we got Savannah, Augusta, Georgia, and Columbus, Georgia. And those are on June 2nd, 3rd, and 5th. And then Montgomery, Alabama on the 4th.

And we added some shows in Florida late June, Hollywood hollywood florida fort myers daytona and lakeland florida deal doing the big boy tour man uh last thing i'm looking forward to that man yeah i'm proud of you brother i'm your fucking crush and both of you guys are last thing on the the gringo poppy what we're doing is with the gringo poppy shirt or whether you're watching the the special if you post and use the hashtag the gringo Poppy, what we're doing is till next Friday, whoever is the most creative, whatever special viewing party with your family, friends, dogs,

your stepdad, your shitty father-in-law, whatever it is, post it. And the most creative five will get a signed poster from me for The Gringo Poppy. And you get a signed bottle of Tiger Thick Whiskey. And then that's the first five, the most creative

and then the other hundred will just get the signed poster. We will decide by next Friday. I think that's May 6th or some shit. And $100,000, so that's great. Oh, no, no, not $100,000. Nope, nope. I already spent all the money on the special. I love you guys, man. Go watch the special right now on YouTube. Thick Boy, the Gringo

Poppy. Love you too, man. Alright, gang, baby. We're good. We're good. Now y'all wanna switch? Y'all just added Stevie and Eric And now y'all adding Chris How's that gonna fit? Wait, I get the gist I just probably have to slow it down And hit it like this It's the king, the wing, and the sting

It's the wing, and the king, and the sting Hold on, wait a minute, let me think It's the king, and the sting, and the wing Let's go King, and the sting, and the wing Brought it full circle I put on the whole team Legendary trio

Brandon, Chris, and Theo What you mean? You know it's the king, and the sting, and the wing. Brought it full circle. I put on the whole team. Legendary trio. Brandon, Chris, and Theo. What you mean? You know it's the king and the sting and the wing.