The Golden Hour - Episode 5

Episode Date: January 23, 2019

The guys break down the first Rip my Drip fan submissions and talk lot lizards, semen lava lamps, courtesy flushes, public restroom news, soft fatty sex necks, Brendan's tips on sock masturbation, Theo overdoses on Pedialyte and much more!Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoicesSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Oh, yeah, it's the Beast and King and the Rat King! Rat King! To the strap, baby, come get it! Beat me, Sting! Rat King. Tim looks like he's about to go to space. Why? He's about to get blasted off.

To find other life forms or some shit. You're going to be out in space hunting podcasts, bro. You're going to be out in space looking for the perfect audio. podcast bro you're out in space looking for the perfect audio he does look like he's freaking the blast up or you look like the biggest freaking music producer in the game look at him yeah dj chin chin chin what's up man what's up not. Your Pedialyte's distracting. Grown men, don't drink Pedialyte. I don't know.

No one told you that growing up? Anybody could drink this. Nope, not true. Found in the children's section. Really? Yeah, and if you're dressed like that, you're going to have problems where I'm from. What are you talking about? This is a nice outfit, I think.

Well, let's get into, rip my drip. Already? Yeah, let's get right into it. Fine. This is strawberry flavor. Have you had this? Is. Already? Yeah, let's get right into it. Fine. This is strawberry flavor. Have you had this? Is that strawberry? Yeah.

So good, man. Is that children's summer strawberry? Oh, kids can drink it. Look at this. Pedialyte. Dude, you can't be drinking Pedialyte. Dude, you have a two-year-old son. You guys can freaking do shots together.

Have fun, bro. Yeah, you don't have any kids, bro. So it's very strange you came in with that. Like, it's nothing, too. Put in another kind of bottle just to be less creepy with it. You know what I'm saying? I don't like how you're flaunting around the studio. I'm not ashamed of it.

I guess it is weird. I guess because I do have like seven empty bottles in the backseat of my car. A Pedialyte? That's a little weird. The grape is good. That drip scissor. This is Theo's outfit here. You look like Captain Planet's side piece.

You know how when gay guys start freaking looking like each other when they hang out too much? That's what you look like. Captain Planet's side piece? You look like Captain Planet. You remember Captain Planet? You guys have the exact same haircut, first of all. Exact same haircut. You look like. That's true. Let me see this. You, first of all. Exact same haircut. You look like...

That's true. Let me see this. You zoom. Okay. You got that donut. You got the Pedialyte. You look like the... Look at him drink that thing.

I look pretty bad. Yeah. I'll be honest, dude. That's why you're sipping that Pedialyte, bro. This isn't my best morning. Yeah, that's both of us, dude. You know what you look like? You look like a Boy Scout leader who carries fucking granola in his pants and sucks the boys off behind the trees.

What? Why couldn't I just have a good snack for the kids, man? I don't understand. Because the haircut, bro. You don't have a haircut like that and just carry delicious snacks. Everybody knows that. Bro, you know how many squirrels come after this cut? This radio wreck.

Dude, you know what you look like? You look like before your boy's about to shoot the biggest special in his life, you sent him the best message of all time, and it made my day. Aw, thanks, man. Yeah, I appreciate it, man. I was nervous as shit. Really? Super nervous, and you sent me that message, and it really came through. I appreciate it. Oh, thanks, bro. Don't fucking touch me.

Don't touch me. Don't fucking touch me ever, dude. Go on to me now. Well, congratulations, man. Thanks, man. Asshole. Your video was really cool well thank you sweetie you just say man i'm proud of you thanks brother it's hard to get work sometimes out here and you know you're probably the first guy with ct to ever shoot a stand-up special number one yeah number one bro yeah number one first guy ever to have his own comedy special on showtime you and i do a tour called the Brain Damage Tour.

The Brain Damage. Or just the Huh Tour with a question mark. I was born with it and you earned it. The Nature vs. Nurture Brain Damage Tour. You're just born like this and I freaking earned mine, man. I know, dude. Damn. Dude, I wonder if you hadn't fought. You might be a freaking earned mine, man. I know, dude. Damn. Dude, I wonder if you hadn't fought.

You might be a scientist or something, man. I know. I might be Elon Musk if I didn't get punched in the face, bro. Not your fucking Elon mustard. Let's bring this guy's drip up, man. Dude, look at that swaggy swag. Wow. Drip, drip.

Dude, those pants are, what kind of cut is that boot cut mute cut you're dressed like a deaf person dude is that mute cut pants well no and those baby blue shoes nothing you want to you want to us you should drink pedialyte if you're wearing that i mean those are hey i just had a boy i just had twin boys i just had quadruplet boys that is as severe baby blue as you can get man dude those are the travis scott's cactus you better step your game up and don't ever travis scott sounds like a four year old is that somebody's name it's a rapper's name oh wow where's the real rappers murder you know larry murder fucking you know larry murder yeah fucking archibald you know killer you know

master p burt yeah mystical burying motherfuckers johnson you know where the real rappers at travis scott they're in prison bro they're in prison yeah yeah they're not artists they're murderers they're in prison but at least they were real travis scott his name is sam his girl's uh kylie jenner it is dude everybody's, everybody's called Kylie Jenner. Not if you're white. That's true. And Kylie Jenner should count as reparations, dude. Doesn't that count as reparations?

Don't the Jenners count? Come on. I think we're even. I think we're even. Rip my drip. First of all, you're wearing that, let's get Jocko Willink on the line and let him know that you're wearing fake army gear. To try to pick up chicks, even though there's only dudes in the office. Wow, you look like you went to boot camp at Foot Locker, bro.

You look like absolute, bro. You look like somebody gargled their own balls and then just said, ah, fuck it, I'm going to swallow them. That's how I have to deal with my dress. Yeah, well, that's who you are, and then you put clothes ah, fuck it, I'm going to swallow him. That's how you like to do it. Yeah, well, that's who you are, and then you put clothes on top of it. So your drip is ripped, but I'm happy about your comedy special. Thanks, brother. You're the best.

Don't fucking touch me. Don't touch me, dude. Don't touch me with your foot either. Do we get some good Rip My Drip submissions? First one, Alex. Ideally, we want to start ripping other people, so I just made a deal. Damn, look at this swaggy feller. Alex, who is it?

Looks like he's straight off Big Pun and the Terror Squad's freaking swag. Yeah, he looks like Fat Joe. Yeah, a little bit, doesn't he? Yeah, he looks like he, what's that jacket made out of, a boiled leopard? A boiled python, and then pumped full of freaking fat. Did he, well, he's clearly at the Grove. So that's in Los Angeles because I know exactly where he's at. Now that coat is way too thick for LA.

Really? Oh, dude. It looks cold though. It looks cold. Is that water cold? Maybe he was in the water. Oh, the breeze off the fountain you're saying? Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Maybe the breeze coming off that fountain could be kind of chilly. Oh, he gets the swaggy jays on, too. I'm not mad at this man's style. You know what? He looks like me. Once I hit a bad break, that's what's going to happen.

Oh, yeah. He definitely looks like you if you, you know, he looks like you maybe if you had taken a little better care of yourself, probably. He looks like he makes the meanest calzone in the world. Oh, dude. He looks like he has the best bratwurst in all the land. Bro, it looks like he could fall asleep with bread under one arm and marinara on the other and wake up with a calzone in his belly button, dude. This guy looks like a fucking straight full-body chef, dude.

You know what I'm saying? He does look like a chef. Chef body RD, bro. This dude will just fall does look like a chef chef body rd bro this dude will just fall asleep with ingredients all over his body and wake up with a creme brulee on his dick chef swaggy d look at him bro what else we got shout out to that dude no damn it doesn't fit anything in top shop juan gonzalez juan gonzalez he looks like a salsa dancer with a girl and fucker that's what he looks like. Dude.

Does he look like that? You don't think so? He has very limited arms. And I say that because I have limited arms. You do. You both have that T-Rex vibe. I don't have that real, you know, I'll hug you, but I'm not going to, my hands aren't going to touch behind your back kind of vibe. No, you're not going to bear hug anybody.

I'm not going to bear hug anybody, but I'll fucking raccoon hug any motherfucker in the joint yeah you'll pause and hug somebody yeah you gotta throw that rack attack on him now this guy definitely looks like he he looks like a guy in charleston that sells used cars i feel like yeah he looks like he has those fake cuban cigars in his back pocket that's what he looks like he looks like he attempts to speak spanish but can't you know he has an app on his phone and it's not working out he's trying to pick up chicks it's just not going well for him yeah he definitely seems like he uh like maybe he grows papayas or something in his front yard or he'll try to throw that swagger on every like the quesadilla when it's not spanish that's what I do. That's what I do.

Yeah, man. That guy. But you know what? I'll say this. He looks like a nice man. He looks like he probably went to college and they have a mirror in his house. That's nice. Some people don't have that. That is a nice mirror.

And the hardwood floors. I'm not mad at those. Dude, poor people, one thing, do not have nice mirrors. That's one thing I remember. Never. That's the least thing you're going to spend on. You just ask somebody else at the house what you look like and they're like you look like shit and then you like cool thanks man that's life all right i'll see you yeah that was the drill but he definitely

looks like a disc jockey um you think he looks like a disc jockey on like a plantation dude he looks like he definitely and i don't know if he you know has ever had any s-L-A-V-E-S, but somebody in his family has it. Oh, wow. All right. All right. Okay. I see where you're going with that. Oh, I was trying to.

Maybe a little bit of a vibe there, huh? Wow. How long did it take you to write it? I mean, I was more surprised by it. I didn't know I could spell it. That took a while. Spelling bees weren't my forte. Getting stung by bees was, though.

Dude. Rat is back. He looks like he owns one of those freaking smoke shops. That's what he looks like. He looks like he owns one of those hookah joints and tries to talk to the girls in Spanish and it's not going well. So he's dressed like a Spanish feller. He's in Miami, clearly.

Yeah, this guy's in Miami or he just has or he lives in like- Ohio. Maybe Columbus, and he has the heat cranked up in his apartment. Nonetheless, he seems like a nice guy. Yeah, shout out to that dude. Keeping his swag even in freaking Ohio, man. Yeah.

All right, the next one is Serena Beer. Damn. Damn, girl. Got that Freddy Krueger stylist. She didn't say. My dreams, bro. She does have that Freddy Krueger krueger stylist she didn't say my dreams bro she does have that freddy krueger style yes she's straight out of my dream dude you feel me you'll dormir say what does that mean cat do you know cats come on dude she's not spanish she's not spanish well whatever dude because she's asian i can tighten up this america you better get you

learn spanish fast dude you're right you. You're right. You're right. Can you zoom in on her? I see the... Can you zoom in on her face, bro? Pick something adult, man. Be a nice guy. Is that Angelina Jolie? God, is that a model?

Wow. And what she wants to rip, ain't nothing to rip, but that dress off. Just kidding. Just kidding. And I will testify against him. Yes, you are a witness

where I said just kidding. Yeah, pan down a little bit. Oh, she's a redhead, bro. She got that Louis C.K. She does? She's a Louis C.K., yeah. Wow, bro. Look at those.

Damn, she's going ultra slow, man. Oh, the only thing? The combat boots. Oh, she has a bad leg. No, she has a bad leg, so she's a little bow-legged, and it goes in, so that's probably going to tweak that ACL on the left there. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, well, she has one of her feet to the right.

And this is – look, this happens to probably one out of maybe 60 or 70,000 children. But their foot does a full right turn in the other direction. Yeah, we call it the Forrest Gump. They do? So she probably – they couldn't afford the brackets, so she just rolls with it. Her boots are – she gets the Andy Dufresnes. They're busted up. But they're kind of you know but they're

kind of sexy yeah where you shine them you know it's whatever i'm cool with the boot oh dude i would definitely uh say what neo with that girl you know what i'm saying bro yeah i'd crawl through some shit for her one of her legs and right brooks was here right up near a jean you feel me yeah i'd hug her like you got that real hitter yeah now does she redhead bro got a set of lips on her too does she who knows first of all this is very pixelated it looks like it's from the 90s yeah but she looks like she's from the future she's a dimey dime she definitely she's a dime she was a dime in the 90s i bet she's about eight cents right now though yeah she's an eight out of ten because it's a little bit pixelated. But with that said, man, she seemed like a nice young lady. She looks like she probably grew up somewhere and they had a lot of different, you know,

items in the house to keep each other healthy, good skin care, fresh water. She looks like she works at Forever 21. Yeah, I guess, dude. Really? What are you doing at Forever 21? I just stroll by it. You should not go by it dressed like that. Do not do that.

Whatever, bro. Don't make me drink my Pedialyte. What else we got? She's a dime. That's it for Rip My Drip? Damn, that's what it means. I thought it meant Forever 2 or 1. Forever 2 or 1, so two for one deal?

Nah, man. Maybe where you're from. But yeah, most places it's Forever 21. Dude, you know what's funny? When I was... You can only be 21 and Do you know what's funny? When I was, um. You can only be 21 and under to shop there. Really? Yep.

Huh. You know, we used to go to the mall and camp out. We'd take a tent and we'd go camp out in Slidell and camp. We'd stay, we'd go to the mall and then get out of the mall, camp out overnight outside and then go back in the mall the next day. Oh, wow. Looking for deals or what? Just being there.

Trying to get that fucking fresh baked cookie for Mrs. Fields. Yeah early hitter out of mrs fields but yeah just being in there we just love being in the mall dude they had all kind of stuff umbrellas everything you can get lost in the outdoor world you ever been like dicks in the mall the giant dicks oh yeah that's crazy yeah you could sleep in there yeah they don't allow you to sleep in them you have to sleep outside but we this we just had like the best thing we had was a like journeys or something one of those stores oh yeah that has like did journeys turn into journeys and spencers the same thing i think yeah it used to be spencers maybe now it's journeys but we had spencers that's what we had yeah we had spencers you go in there and they had like a lava land but no one ever bought anything

no stole something or just walked yes, you never saw anyone with an actual receipt from Spencer's. Same thing with Sharper Image. I'd go in there and touch everything. I don't know one single person my entire life who ever bought anything. Massage chair was 30 G's. I'm 14, man.

You know what I'm saying? Dude, we would always spill lemonade in those fucking massage chairs, bro, until they started smoking up a little. Smoking up. Dude, they had the weirdest, like, who wants a baby diaper that sorts coins, you know? It's the weirdest shit. Oh, little Lawrence is awake, and guess what? We got $3 in dimes, you know?

Piece of shit. Let's move on. Weirdest shit. What do we got now? Let's do it. You guys want to do a King of Sting? Yeah. You need your buttons, or are you good? For King of Sting? you know piece of shit let's move on weird as shit what do we got now let's do it you guys want to do king or sting it yeah you need your buttons are you good uh for king or sting oh we need them buttons we need them hit us it's time for king it or sting it oh oh oh dj brown brown

brown dj big brown and your favorite stepmom, Theo, Theo, the Rat King Vaughn. All right, first one's from Michael Huff. You look like you just got fired from Outdoor World. Hi, Rat King and Beasting. How you guys doing? Shout out to Nick and Chin in the back doing work. Name's Michael Huff.

I'm a truck driver, so I can't really say I can rep a state. So I rep all of the U.S. of A. That's where I'm a truck driver so I can't really say I can rep a state so I rep all of the US of A that's where I'm from serial killer and the uh king and her stinger that I got for you guys today spinners spinning whips players trying to see if I could put some on my truck give everybody a breeze let me know everybody I thought I was referring to spinners the girls cuz he's jacking off in that truck all across America. No, he isn't, bro. Why are you thinking about that, man?

He seems like a nice guy who's just trying to get potatoes from fucking Idaho. Oh, he has a picture of spinners? Oh, damn, he has spinners. No, these are the kind of spinners he's talking about. Oh, he's dope. This guy's awesome. He looks like he's part of Lenny Kravitz's crew, dressed like that. Yeah, man.

Dude, hell yeah to spinners. Now, I'd say late 90s, early 2000s, Nelly made them super hot. Yeah. People had spinners. And Spreewells, too. Them Spreewells, bro. Yeah, but now you get them, not great, bro. However, on your truck, it's pretty swaggy.

Oh, I think if you got that big you know that cruiser i mean that did i mean when you basically when you're in a 18 wheel or whatever they are 19 wheeler those things are amazing bro i mean you could fucking hit somebody a hitchhiker you don't even feel it you carry 70 000 people no one cares oh dude drug trafficking human trafficking those things are easy yeah bro bro. And get rid of these shady crops. If you're, you know, driving around,

you know, lemons or squirrels, squirrels. Yeah. Which is really tough. There's no way you could convince that many squirrels to get into that big of a truck. You just put nuts in there. Maybe,

but I'll say this, that you could get a good product, medical devices. Yeah. Like he's saying, good product, medical devices. Yeah, like he's saying. Legos. Legos, no. That's not a fucking. Oh, how about meat?

Like meat, like fillets. Get meat, dude. Ribs. You'll be that salmonella bad boy just fucking running dirty meat all around. The 18-wheeler meter, baby. Dude, that 18-wheeler meat, that would fucking sell. Hell yeah. Bro, how many?

I bet that guy has chicks all over. That guy's just driving and swiping on 10s. Oh, dude, fucking all over the land, spreading his seed in every city with them lot lizards. It's actually a pretty good gig. You know how a lot of professional athletes have groupies? Truck drivers have lot lizards. That's Michael Huff, man. Yeah, bro.

So Michael Huff, he just pulls into there to refresh and get a quick nap. have groupies truck drivers has lot lizards that's michael huff man yeah bro so michael huff you just he just pulls into there to refresh you know and get a quick uh nap before he's on the road and then this lot lizard just jumps into the truck sucks the boys off goes to the next truck what dude every one of your stories somebody gets sucked off even if it's like about christmas or anything man you need to fucking get your act together. You know what? I need to see the guy you're seeing. I need to go talk to somebody.

You do. But that's a lot lizard, bro. That's life. You ever seen True Life on the lot lizard? No. Oh, and their mouths are just so ashy. Really? They're just inflamed from sucking truck driver cotton.

Oh, my God. Yeah. It happens, bro. And it would be tough, too, to blow somebody who's just been driving all day. You're talking about the sticky dick? Yeah. That truck driver dick? Oh, it's like eating a fucking Slim Jim.

Dude, I would pull the horn whenever I come, though. I'll be honest about that. How could you not? Bro, you know what? If I was a truck driver, I'd walk in, I'd get a fucking full Coca-Cola Slurpee, a Slim Jim, go back to my truck, have one of them Lot Lizards come in, and then just Slurpee, Slim Jim, Dick's side. Every state, bro. Every state.

And then just pick out the pink Starburst. That should be the national anthem, what you just said, dude. Yeah, when I come, huh, huh. Dude, you're right. Dude, they're living the life. When you think about it. You're going to be living the life. They figured it out, man. Dude, you could be one of the top 60 or 70 truck drivers, I're right. Dude, they're living the life when you think about it. You're going to be living the life. They figured it out, man.

Dude, you could be one of the top 60 or 70 truck drivers, I'll bet. Michael Hoff, I like you. You keep it strolling out there with them spinners. Now, if you get them big spinners, I would love to see you get something like they have on those windmills where the spinners create enough electricity to keep that truck going. That's smart. Or at least keep a lava lamp going up in the front. Yeah, that's smart. That's really smart.

And if you could actually ejaculate into that fucking lava lamp, bro, you could add more lava. You know what I'm saying? I didn't even think about it. There's a bunch of sperm worms spinning around in your lava lamp, daddy. Now we're talking, dude. Yeah, like sea monkeys. Yeah. Yeah, but sea monkey lava lamp.

Dude, why don't they make a lava lamp for boys or adult men's bedside table? Yeah, that you can jizz in in and then it fucking lives in there. Like sea monkeys. Then you feed them. Yeah. Crackers. No. No.

Different. All right. Well, I'm going to definitely say king spinners on your 18-wheeler, son. Yeah, I'll king it, man. Nice. All right. Next one's from Ethan Ludwig. What's up, Theo and Brendan?

It's your boy E here. Oh, he's the lead singer. I'm taking a shit right now at a public restaurant. Oh, okay. King of the stinking. Talking to the guy next to you while you're taking a shit. Oh. Oh.

Yowzers. That's how a brown neighbor, bro. We used to play that game. Really? Brown neighbor, brown neighbor, won't you do me a favor? Let me think about it. That's called brown neighbor, bro. We used to play that game. Really? Brown neighbor, brown neighbor, won't you do me a favor? Let me think about it. Brown neighbor, brown neighbor, won't you do me a favor? Take that brown and flush it down.

Take that brown and flush it down. And you hit on the wall. Really? Yeah. And you guys like all do that? Never. Really? Never.

Because where I'm from, you keep your face forward, and you don't open your stupid mouth. What? You drop the Browns off to the Super Bowl, and you get out of there, bro. You get the fuck out of there. Well, you're limited. Obviously, you come from a limited existence. And what I'm saying, yeah, you would do Brown neighbor, Brown neighbor, won't you do me a favor? That part was the take that Brown and flush it down, send it down to sewage town, and you'd hit the wall.

Oh, wow. You know if you tap your foot game on yeah yeah like you tap it under you're gonna get something that you don't want well you might i don't know but it's not my thing i don't then why are you telling people how to do it and sending out the vibe dude here's what i'm saying is this i'm gonna say big sting it do not talk to your neighbor while you're dropping loads dude one time a big black guy was in the stall next to me and he kept beating the wall. He was like, give me that courtesy flush, dog.

Really? Yeah, and I got so scared, dude. Was it Shaquille O'Neal? I have no idea, bro. It was Shaquille O'Neal. But you were scared. Huh? You were scared.

It must have smelled like shit, and he got really upset. But I think it was him, man. Damn, he punked you. He did. Flush that shit! Yeah, dude, and I didn't want to. Yeah, you don't want it because you're still on the thing, and then the cold water gets on your ass. I'm scared, bro.

Dude, Joe Rogan has one of them toilets that shoots water into your booty hole. Oh, really? After you take a shit. Not for me. Not for me. Really? Not for me. That's like a SeaWorld.

I guess you get those at SeaWorld, huh? Yeah, you can for the dolphins, but I didn't. I used it, and it was a mess. My undies were wet. My jeans got wet. Damn. I was actually dirtier. I don't, but I didn't. I used it, and it was a mess. My undies were wet. My jeans got wet. I was actually dirtier. I don't know what I'm doing. Yeah, were you using it to hydrate yourself after a basketball game?

Dude, I thought it was a water fountain. It was just shooting nice water up. I don't know. Different times, man. I'm going to definitely say sting, shitting, and talking to anybody because I'm an American, and that's very, very un-American. So you're saying sting it? Big sting.

Okay. Don't talk to me while I'm taking shits. I don't like my friends like, hey, man, no, no, no, no, no, no. Dude, I'll talk to you when I get out. I'm doing work in here. I got to focus, dude. Yeah. I got to focus.

Yeah, one end of my body open at a time, you know, either my mouth's closed and my butt's open or vis-a-verse. Yeah, one end of my body open at a time, you know, either my mouth's closed and my butt's open or vis-a-verse. What I'm saying is this, dude. I think these days sitting on the shitter and listening to somebody is probably one of the most trusted ways to get news in America. Do you know it's the truth? Yeah, I mean, it could be. It's just as good as anything else. So I say it's a trusted news source, shitter to shitter, wall to wall communication.

You're right there. You know, I say keep the rumor mill afloat and just don't forget to flush brown i come from neighbor no not where i come from so no i said it's king it you're king in it yep yep i say king it i say sting it all right next one is connor minnow rat king and the bee sting. Gang gang baby, buzz buzz. Buzz buzz baby. So king it or sting it. Girls with nose rings. The ones on the side, I don't think they're that weird, but the ones that make them look like a bull freak me out. Preach bro. Preach Louis C.K. Here's the thing dude, I agree with Homeboy, the one here, you got daddy issues.

The one on the side, we going sizzler. I love the one on the side. I think that's so sexy. Even a fat girl can do that. I'm like, damn, that shit's sexy. Yeah. They put that little one, that little cute one on the side. Oh, yeah. Looks like RiRi.

Oh, yeah. Well, nobody's going to sizzle it. They've been out of business for about seven years. You're just going to be driving around with a woman in your car. No, you'd be surprised. Dude, you'd be surprised. They're still around. Really?

Yeah, sizzlers are around. They're a thing. Where? Like on the black market? Yeah. That's that truck driver. He knows where. They're all around. Really? Yeah, scissors are around. They're a thing. Where? Like on the black market? Yeah. Ask that truck driver. He knows where. They're all over, bro.

Yeah, that's true. Lot lizards are in scissors. Michael Huff, dude, who also was wearing a wig. We didn't bring that up about the guy. No, he wasn't. Okay. Yeah, he was. Go back to him real quick.

That ain't no wig, bro. That's Lenny Kravitz. He's a damn good looking dude. He's the most stylish truck driver i've ever seen also is he on a set why is there black curtains behind him you know why because he's dicking down all the lizards in the back look at that taking him down with hatchets bro most people who drive around across the country fucking people are killers no you got that wrong bro that's true my bad dude man they drop off nice quality goods and then they spread their seeds amongst the town.

That's true, dude. When you come to think of it, a lot of the kids around America just probably come from truck drivers. The majority. Yeah. That's crazy. All right. Go back to our boy.

These nuts got to be in Utah by morning, honey. I'm out. Yeah. Okay. Gang, gang, man. I love that beard, dude. That is that beard that it's like another couple inches and I'm moving out of the house Or I'm taking my whole family into the woods, you know?

Yeah, he looks like the lead singer of Godsmack Yeah, yeah And he looks like the Lord touched him too, bro Man, it's truly beautiful Got beautiful blue eyes on him too Healthy skin too Moisturized He's got some safety jacket on

It looks like he's working for the city Probably not getting paid Because they're on strike right now, which is probably why he has time to send this. Working for the city of hope, brother. He probably cures cancer, dude. What are we going to learn from this guy? We learn that the bull ring is disgusting. Oh, yeah.

And the one on the side, you want to get involved. That middle hitter looks a little bad to me. That's that Alvin Kamara. If you see Alvin Kamara on the Saints, he wears that gold middle piece. Oh, no, dude. So does, who's the rapper little uh little uzi little jim uzi oh yeah jim uzi vert he does uzi wears it little uzi wears that thing as a grown man you can't do that bro unless you're lenny kravitz can't pierce the ear well or the nose my thing is this man if you do you can't that's a no i don't know it almost looks like

something you would get it uh at spencer's gifts honestly and then he pierced the middle yeah that's crazy that boy has depression but that's brave also that is brave well little peter fucking killed himself remember he ate all those pills that guy oh that's right oh dude yeah bro i look at him i think depression next yeah yeah well it's different man it's a different time the middle one i don't know i think if you know and he said on girls if maybe if they kept an extra house you know key or something on that sucker in case you got locked out then i could see some use to it that makes sense you know i feel like you'd look good with just a button like that right there dude i feel like you'd pull so many more hoes and dudes

whatever you like really just put that earring right there earring in my nose yeah you'd look dope with that dude i have to have a big nose there'd be a big earring dude it probably would like a quarter pound if i can weigh down the left side of my head no just cut out a penny just put a penny there now that might be cool if you had like your penny loafers, but it becomes your nose and people put nickels in their nose. I say it's a case-by-case basis, but it does – when I see a woman with that, it does make me think that she's a brave lady. And it makes me feel like, well, if she'll stick something through her nose, she might at least let me take her out to eat or something. So I'm going to say king it. You're going to say king it? I'm also going to say king it because I see that She might at least let me take her out to eat or something. I'm going to say Kingit. You're going to say Kingit?

I'm also going to say Kingit because I see that nose ring. I think Wrist Taker. She's down for that. She's down for that ass play. Kingit! Jesus. What else we got? Where are we?

We're here. This is a hard name. We're here. Oli Nemela. Here we go. One of the guys, this is Oli from Sweden. That's a hard name. Shout out to my gang. Gang, gang. And gang name from Sweden. Shout out to the real king. Here we go. One of the guys is from Sweden. That's a hard name. Shout out to my gang.

Gang, gang. And gang nation Sweden. Shout out to the real king, the rat king, the sting king. I have one question for you guys. Colonization of Mars. King it or sting it? Don't you fucking question me. Hilarious.

Dude. What was going on? Hold on, hold on. I got so many questions. There's a full rack of moose horns in the back it's sweet dude there's that's our national there's fires that he's stoking it's not like this is just your regular shit this and that's not a fireplace bro is this liam neeson's son bro who this is very unique he's from sweden brother dude no you know what he's the bad guy of

triple x who smokes all the cigarettes non-stop that's such a movie reference you guys wouldn't fucking know i remember that guy god look at this shitty movies like that this is a burn barrel he has is very unique it seems like there's something there i have a lot of questions and sweden yeah right yeah i mean yeah is this sweden who knows he sounds sweden he's from sweden okay there you go defense rest um so he wants to uh basically living on mars the colonization of mars yeah nah fuck that man not for us look if sweden wants to go up there i say you guys do it good luck you're the're the guinea pigs. Yeah. We can't colonize Detroit. Okay. We can't colonize half of the cities in America.

We're trying to figure out LA. Yeah. Why are we going to go up to Mars and complicate things? Yeah, dude. I saw a guy busting a nut off when I was exiting the 10 earlier this morning. So we haven't colonized earth yet. No, we got a lot to learn here. Yeah.

We got a lot to learn. Fuck Mars right now. And also it's red. Yeah. It's learn brother mars right now and also it's red yeah it's red on the i mean it's red on like a chart is that what you're saying like are you saying the the earth of that giant planet is red the earth of it okay we need to take a break so brennan cannot figure out some ideas for the second half of the show bro can you name how many planets can you name oh dude i can name all of them can, bro. Can you name... How many planets can you name? Oh, dude, I can fucking name all of them. Can you?

Yeah. You can't name that many drinking Pedialyte and dressed like that. This is a good drink. Does Pedialyte remind you of home? Why the fuck are you drinking it, bro? Bro, I can't get over

my fucking troubled childhood. It's so good, man. Yeah, it's so much sugar in that thing Is it really? Are you kidding me? That's why your titties hang down to your belly I don't know All right

Oh, wow, 18% of a day is sugar Hold on, bro Just so you know, look at this Let me educate your ass real quick I might not know my planets But peep this So this has 25 grams of sugar Is that a lot? Oh, hold on Hold up So this has 25 grams of sugar.

Is that a lot? Oh, hold on. Hold up. 25 grams, and it's one serving, so there's three servings, so there's 75 grams of sugar in here. Fuck, man. I've had four of these. Dude, you look good, though, bro.

Keep drinking it, man. Put some ice on it. What are you, a psycho? Put it on ice. Peed a light on ice? What. What are you, a psycho? Put it on ice. Peed a light on ice? Put a little codeine in that? You got that real scissor, that kitty scissor. You think I'm the most interesting man in the nursery?

The most interesting man on the playground? You sound like a real pedophile. I'm trying to help you out. I'm the most interesting man on the playground. I can't drink any more of this shit. There's not much sugar in it. I've washed two donuts down with this a little while ago. I'm not going to make you out. Man, on the playground. I can't drink any more of this shit. There's not much sugar in it. Nah, dude, you're fine. I washed two donuts down with this a little while ago.

I'm not going to fucking make it out of this chair. You have diabetes. Oh, I'll tell you now, you have diabetes. Oh, dude, definitely. Michael Huff, come pick me up, man. Come get it with them spinners, bro. Yeah, man. I have a couple of lot lizards in there, too, because he doesn't have long. I have no idea.

He doesn't have long. I'm going to need those spinners to lower my glucose level, man. I need help. You need them lot lizards to have insulin needles as well no idea. I'm gonna have long. I'm gonna need those spinners to lower my glucose level, man. I need help. You need them lot lizards to have insulin needles as well. Colonization of Mars? Fuck Mars. Fuck Mars. No.

The hell no. I'm stinging. Oh, my God. I just freaked out. Brennan just had a stroke and hit his buzzer, dude. You have diabetes. I just had a stroke. Let's get a replay to Brennan trying to get through that sentence.

It's an upset. No, we have actual replay now. No, I just did it, bro. Okay. I did it for you. Hey, that's a true talent, man. That guy does his own replays. Yeah, dude.

I can do slow motion, too. Yeah, I can do slow motion. All right, just kidding. Oh, that was pretty good, though. Thanks, dude. That was good. But I'm going to say no. I'm going to say sting it for me.

I'm going to say fuck no. Wow. Sting it it is. All right. Next one's a big fan. What's up, boys? Matty Mack. I'm a huge fan.

I wrote you this song for the king and the sting. Beautiful skin. I'm hoping that you like it enough to use it for the intro. Look at the veins in his arm. It's the king and the sting. Dane's in his arm. Oh, man. Damn, bro. Made me want to pull my pants down. Please don't.

Mm-hmm. Oh, wow. Hit that high note. Octavia Spencer, bro. Hitting them Octavia. All right. Celine Dion and this bitch on the beach. Dude, how is that not the official song? How is that not our official intro? I mean, we got to decide. It's King or Sting right there. Dude, how's that not the official song? How's that not our official intro?

I mean, we got to decide. It's King or Sting right there. Dude, that's it, bro. That's Matty Mac. That is it. Shout out to Matty Mac, wealthy conscious. At Matty Mac NJ on social. Dude, that's it.

Well, that's so much better than that other one. First of all, I felt like there were not, I'll say this, this gentleman seemed like a nice young guy. Put a lot of effort into it. Seemed like an adult college kid, probably played soccer. It looks like his, you know, short arms, but he's athletic. He definitely played soccer. He has a shirt on that says science. So you know he knows his science.

Well, he believes in science, so. That's a good thing. Strike one. Dude, I think we change the theme song to that next week. See how it goes. Really? Yeah. It's such a fun tune.

Let's hear it one more time. Is that okay, Chen? Yeah, no problem. The rapping was fun. The whole thing was dope. What's up, boys? I'm a huge fan. It is cool.

Thank you very much, Matthew. I wrote you this song for the King of the Sting. I'm hoping that you like it enough to use it. Do we have just the audio, though? Yeah, we can grab it. Easy. He's obviously Persian. Is he? Yeah, bro.

He could just be sunburned and be Italian. Prince of Persia, baby. This is more our vibe, bro. Yeah, hit it. It's got a little Bill Cosby in it. Yeah, it does, bro. Dude, that's it, bro. Ah, dude, that's it, bro. It grows on you. I love

it. It grows on you, man. King, king, king. Let's try it next week, bro. See how it goes. Maybe the fans will dig it. You know what? I'm open to a new experience. I'm willing to try it next week. I'll say this. He brought all that equipment out there to the beach. I mean, you guys can't see it on the audio only, but this gentleman out at the beach.

Or he just has a bunch of sand in an area. That might be his backyard. You know what? He might be like the legit prince of Persia. Yeah, that's true. And that's his backyard. That's his house. That's his backyard.

That's true. Because sand is just grass over there. You're right. And so he might just have, yeah, it might not be at the beach, but it's outdoors. And his friends all live behind him. Like he had that built in his backyard. He probably has his own cemetery if he wants it. For sure.

And I bet that if he... I just expected a few more bars. He's out at the beach. You got the equipment out there. No, I keep it simple, man. You don't want it too long. You don't need that three-minute intro. He just hit the...

Oh, God. I love this dude. Catching... Big king of Doug. All right,. Big king it, dog. Alright, I'll king it, man. I'll give you a shot. Shout out to Matty Mac NJ. But the buzzers mean no.

Well, I'm just doing that. King it! Damn, okay. Well, then mine will just be the... Yeah, yours is no. Alright, what else we got? You guys ready for Flop My Aunt? Hell yeah! Bring on these bad bitches.

All right, this first one, we just got in. Ooh, doggy, we coming out. The gate. Jonathan Tro LTX. Who sent it? Jonathan Troll. Jonathan Troll. Wow.

Damn, bro. Real life chick, man. Like an old school aunt. King it, huh? King it, yeah bro i'm not mad at the he's flaunting huh wait is that a that's a is that a female or male that's a female it's flaunt my aunt bro well no you can flaunt anyone though we call it the segment flaunt my aunt but you could say that might be flaunt my nephew i't know. That ain't a nephew, dude. That's an adult, man. Is that an adult? Yeah.

It looks like. It's an aunt, bro. You can't be a, I mean, I guess you could be a 14-year-old, you know, a child aunt. You could. How is that not a show? Child aunt. I know. Chris Hansen needs a gig.

Yeah, he does. Dude, she, this is tough because I like the style. I like the glasses. You ever seen, eyes are a little googly, whatever. You ever seen – remember Sally Jessie Raphael? Remember? That's what she looks like. This hair, first of all.

And you didn't have a TV growing up, so you have no idea what I'm talking about. Let me draw it for you. Let me draw it for you like you were a kid. There you go. Oh, yeah. Yeah, there you go. I remember her from Chicago. Yeah, there you go.

That's her. I'll say this. Yeah, there you go. I remember her from Chicago. Yeah, there you go. That's her. I'll say this. She does have that very outdoorsy kind of groundhog kind of look.

She looks like a human squirrel, to be real. She does not, dude. First of all, why is there zero distance between her eyebrows and her hairline? Why does she have a helmet on? Why does she have a helmet on? Why does she have a helmet of hair on? That's a hair mint. That thing is full of hair. And why does she have white hair also at this age?

Why does she have white hair? You know, back then they'd have, there's no highlights. That's her natural shit. It's all gray down the side. And then, can you see Mars from here? Look at those fucking Coke cans, son! Those are sick. Those are

glasses, bro. No, they're not. Those are telescopes. Well, first of all, the glasses aren't even over her eyes. That's a weird thing. They're way too low. So all that's gonna happen is the sun's gonna hit them and they going to burn holes in her cheeks. I don't even know if she's getting any benefit out of her side of the glass.

Is she a college science professor? How the fuck is she wearing? She looks like a science project, bro. She looks like a fourth grader's drawing of sally jesse raphael i hope that she weighs over three or four ounces otherwise they're gonna start injecting lipstick and hairspray into her and using her at a testing facility for johnson and johnson what i'm saying is she doesn't have a very small and uh you know something you would eat at thanksgiving but maybe like a native like kind of the Native American times when they would have a squib or whatever it is or a little bird.

What is that little bird? Squab? Squab. Squab. Is that a bird or not, Chase? I don't know. She looks like she has birds living in her hair. There is a baffling amount

of zero space between her nose and eyes. And a huge amount of hair, guys. And the glasses are just like this fucking big, man. And the hair, she has to be worried that that hair's going to grow over her eyes, you know? Oh yeah, soon, brother.

It's coming. Tomorrow. Oh, a strong wind from the south she'll never see again that's the problem she looks like she eats alone and tv dinners at night and she looks fucking that hair is tough it looks like she has a lot of friends and that they probably read books or go to the library she looks like she had the best trapper keeper in the school that's what she looks like she looks like like she's organized too you know what i'm saying yeah that's true 100 ocd has her notes with her at all times. And she was the girl with all the pencils and pens in school.

Yeah. We knew if you ran out, you could hit up that girl. Yeah. That's what she looks like. But no scissors, bro. No scissors. No scissors. No.

She says no to scissors. Yeah. Yes to science. Yes to science. No to scissors. Yes to science. What else we got? Flaunt her.

Beautiful lady. Yeah, I like her. All right. Here we go. I like her after we fucking ripped her to shreds. No, she's fucking dope, man. She does seem cool. She's a unique looking human.

I agree with that. And I would love to see. If this was men in black, I'd be like, oh, well, that's an alien, clearly. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, I would love to see a picture of her now. Oh, yeah, me too. Be cool.

Me too. Send it in. She's like a nice lady. All right, this is from Jim see a picture of her now. Oh, yeah, me too. Be cool. Me too. Send it in. She's like a nice lady. All right, this one's from Jim Dude. He brought two aunts, Connie and Tina. Ooh, I'll take that Tina, dude. You're talking about that young hitter on the left? Are you talking about the Pat character on the right?

Tina is on the right, I think. Yep. And she's getting some sun. You can see a little bit of sun hitting her face. Not too much water, though. Fuck, I can't believe I drank all this Pedialyte. Dude, drink that Pedialyte, bro. I'm starting to feel like my head is starting to feel swollen.

It looks swollen. It does? A little bit. Fuck. I thought you had that Pedialyte brain. I guess I can't believe they give this shit to kids, man. It's fucked up. Yeah.

Now you know, dude. It's not for adults. Kids, it helps them adults it makes you stupider don't say that dude that might not be true i had no joke i bought four of these last night and this is the fourth one it's just why would you do that i like it did you tell your uh parole officer about this sponsor you kind of parole officers you have in prison dude i don't know what you did in the past, man. Shit.

That haircut. Jesus. Brown neighbor, brown neighbor, bro. Somebody flush this guy. I can't believe you guys. Connie or Tina, dude. Dude, I like both. They're having a nice conversation.

I like the aunt on the right kind of has her titties out. You know what I'm saying? Like little flaunt my tits a little bit there. Yeah. Yeah, but also get them out of my face because I'm trying to enjoy my summer salad. Yeah, don't bug me. What's your name? Aunt Flaunt?

Tina. Tina. Connie's the one in the green. She doesn't look like a Tina, does she? She wants you to bug her jugs. That's what it looks like, dude. She wants you to frickin' She's trying to get motorboat. Oh, yeah.

She wants to eat macaroni salad while you suck her tits. I wouldn't motorboat them, but I might see-do past them, bitches. You feel me? Connie and Tina are also both nicknames for drugs. Oh, really? I think this whole thing is just... Huh? What's a Tina?

Tina is like a little bit of Coke. They used to call it if you got a Tina. Oh, you give me a Tina? Yeah. You give me a Tina? What's a Steven? Steven is a buddy of mine who actually passed away. His brother's name is Steven.

And then what's the lady on the left? Connie. What's a Connie in the drug world? I don't know, but it sounds like something. Give me a couple Connie's, bro. You know, about to fuck it. Give me three Connie's and a Dave on the side. Yeah.

Yeah. Give me a fucking ounce of that Larry, bro. You feel me? Yeah, most people's names are just code words for drugs, dude. It sounds like it. His name is Jim Dude. That's what I'm saying. His name is Jim Dude? Jim Dude. I'm saying. His name is Jim Dude?

Jim Dude. Yeah, man. I'll take a fucking... I might have been honeydicked with these two regular ants. I'll take two fucking grams of that Michael Huff. You feel me? They're both wearing them cardigans. This is clearly in frickin' Denver, Colorado.

What else we got? What else we got? Don't sit in your normal ass looking ants, either. They were nice people. Yeah, those ants look like... You get your one ant that... Bro, why don't we... Chocolate drip baby baby allison wow she seems like she um she seems like a nice lady has a dumper on her because if we could rotate this thing she looks like she has that video

vixen dumper yeah but why don't we just talk about how nice she looks and what about this she has a little petticoat dude that looks like a nice leather jacket she has the tits perked up in the front she's got dumper in the back two tits two eyes smile very nice lady a very nice smile now what's going on in the background this is clearly one of those photo shoots at the mall you know somehow they talked her into taking this picture and a dangerous mall at that there seems to be bullet holes in the wall behind her now there seems to be some dude to the left who was cut out which she clearly didn't want in the picture which i approve of that's probably her ex i bet yeah for sure but she is flaunting that she's a beautiful lady she looked

like she might be um african-american and that she's a beautiful lady she looked like she might be um african-american and nate maybe native american too she has like a strong cheekbone she might be tongan yeah maybe a drop of cherokee indian in her yeah she got that fucking tongan side hitters bro yeah she tongans have a fucking chin bone on she got that damn brontosaurus they do then she got that tomahawk booty oh Oh, yeah, bro. Oh, yeah. She got that real sharp butt. What else, man? She's in shape, too, bro. She is in shape, bro.

This is the best aunt we've ever had. That's somebody's aunt? Someone's aunt. Goddamn. What's her name? Aunt Allison. Damn, Allison. Damn, Allison.

She also looks like she started off as a receptionist, but she's working her way up. And she's almost maybe going to be the head of a company soon or just start her own company she looks like she'll sell you some spinners now oh yeah she does she'd look like she'd sell you some spinners are you into uh do you like black girls you like chocolate drip um but like from louisiana you wouldn't be i mean i would. I probably had a different experience. Like they didn't have like a lot. Like this one black girl beat me up during volleyball when I was young. Why?

Because you were shitty at the game? She was violent. But yeah, I was pretty bad at it. Was it volleyball or tetherball? Because I feel like she'd beat the shit out of you in tetherball. No, she beat me up just during the game volleyball. But actually, I hooked up with a black girl out here a couple years ago, about nine years ago, and it was very – I wasn't – it wasn't –

You were too light in the ass, I feel like, because you have a flat ass and most of them don't. Dude, I got that hitter, bro. What are you talking about, dude? I got a couple of fucking deaf yard boys under my fucking pants, man. A couple flapjacks behind there, bro. What the ass of a down syndrome kid man yeah you haven't seen it then you know a lot of you don't apparently you don't have a lot of friends with some yoga pants that mental health issues then like i do uh but beautiful lady on allison hottest one we've

had yet shout out to to Aunt Allison. Awesome. One last one from Brandon Ristow. Grandma Lorna, and I guess her nickname's Horny Lorny. Dude, no joke. This has all my favorite things in it. Winnie the Pooh, which I actually really do like, dude. You like Winnie the Pooh? Where's my tail? Oh, you like Igor. Is that that his name it's eeyore eeyore yeah but i like the 100 acre wood bro you

know i'm saying a lot of bitches out there in that 100 acre dude and what's that say uh plan to reel in some honey we don't fish for honey bitch so yeah she's flaunting that sexy pink sweatshirt. She's got that little bit of neck hang. You can do Rip My Drip. She's got that, you know. She's got that gullet, bro. She's got that turkey gobble. Gobble, gobble, baby. She looks a little bit like a little bit of John Goodman in her, right?

There's a little bit of a John Goodman vibe going on. She's got that John Goodman. She looks right? There's a little bit of a John Goodman vibe going on. She's got that John Goodman looks like Jeff Ross a little bit. She looks like she's on Roseanne's couch right now, just chilling. She smoked weed for the first time on the set of Roseanne. Yeah, she does.

Yeah, man, she really does. I feel like look like... Damn, that neck, Edna. Let's go all the way down. Oh, that neck is trying to fucking take her face off. And I like that. I like that too, man. It looks like the softest skin in the world.

Oh, that's a sex neck. Dude, that's that shit. You open up like a god. You just grab it like a pear of the cell. Bro, that shit is so soft. That's the softest skin in the world.

Your grandma's fat ass neck, that turkey gobbler, there's not softer skin in the world. Your grandma's fat ass neck, that turkey gobbler, there's not softer skin in the world. Cat is offended right now. Well, they eat them, bro. Dude, my grandma has nine chins. Does she really? Nine chins.

Wow. Yes. That's unbelievable. Yeah, it's pretty cool. And it's the softest skin of all time. When I go for a hug, I make sure I put my fingers through the chapters of her neck. The chapters. That was pretty good, man.

That was a good synonym. Thanks, dude. Man, I think all that sugar is giving me a damn headache. Yeah, you kind of fell off, bro. I might have to call the 1-800 number on that thing. You look like you had some bad bears

on your Boy Scout trip and you're not doing well. Yeah, I've had probably almost 2,000 grams of sugar. Sugar rush. I had a lot, dude. I had those probably almost 2,000 grams of sugar. Sugar rush. I had a lot, dude. I had those donuts. I had one of them donuts. I feel great. And that aunt with her fat ass neck.

Oh my god, bro. That aunt looks like she eats 12 donuts a day. Oh, right. Let's leave her alone, bro. She seems like a woman that spends time at the YMCA. She's very active. Is she very active? Yeah, she looks pretty active. You think? think maybe not i feel like she does nothing but read and give it and give

advice to everybody on their relationships like she likes to be the one all up in the relationships that's what she looks like and gives terrible and but she's single it's never worked out for her she got that spicy headpiece though man she's, you can't see her on the audio. She has on a trucker hat. To the side. Like she's Flavor Flav. Like David Spade, yeah. Yeah, she looks like David Spade.

Dude, how about the title says Grandma Lorna Horny Lorny. Horny Lorny. Horny Lorny. So she throws that fucking chirp. Dude, she'll get that chirp, chirp, cricket neck on your dick. Rub it right, baby. Cr your dick. Rub it right, baby. Rub it right.

You're an idiot, dude. I feel like you deciding to talk is just like somebody who just starts falling downhill and they have no idea

where they're at. Yeah, and it's on. Is that it for this, Jim? Yeah, that's last fall out. Shout out to

Horny Lorny. Horny Lorny about to take that bust off of me. You guys ready for debate club? Oh, fuck. I forgot we had debate. Yeah.

Yeah, let's do it. All right. I don't think we've been debating enough. Theo's about to pass out from all the Pedialyte children's books. Dude, my eyes are closing, bro. My eyes are keep closing. Your face starting to swell up like it's stung, huh? Welcome to the club, bro.

I don't know. Now you see what I deal with. Now you see what I deal with every day. Struggle is real, man. You got that venom in your system. I need that grandma chin. All right, what do we got? All right, the first one's from Johnny McCroskowski.

Polish power. You fucking savages. No. Debate club. Great item, bro. I know. Happy Gilmore or Billy Madison. Why does he have DVDs still?

Debate that. Which one of those motherfuckers is funnier? What's up, John Moszkowski? Thank you for sending it in. That video's not creepy at all. Is he on the dark web and then sent this? What's going on there? Happy Gilmore, Billy Madison.

Two of my all-time favorites. Adam Sandler was my favorite growing up as a kid. I could easily see that. Seem like a guy you like. He's funny. Yeah, I love him. Ah, fuck. I don't You're like he's funny. Yeah, I love him. Happy. Ah, fuck. I don't know.

This one's tough. Billy Madison I dig because it reminds me of Theo because he had to go back through school. He had to do it his way. Basically, he was homeschooled and then had to go back because he failed all the grades. So I love that. That's Billy Madison? That's Billy Madison. And Billy Madison, Veronica Vaughn.

I don't think I've seen Billy Madison. But I have seen, what's the other one? What? You've never seen Billy Madison? I don't think so. Tell me about what it's about again. Were you raised in a cave? You've never seen Billy Madison?

No. You didn't have electricity. That makes sense. You didn't have electricity. We had electricity. I remember the movie we watched growing up, Curly Sue. Have you ever seen that? Yeah.

Yeah. Are you from the 60s? No, I haven't seen that, bro. It's a great film. You've never seen Happy Gilmore? I have seen Happy Gilmore. It's a golfing movie. Bob Barker beats his ass.

And you know who else is in Happy Gilmore? Will Sasso makes a cameo. Oh, wow, really? Yep, in the beginning. This one's too tough to call. If I had to pick, Billy Madison, baby. Really? Sounds like it's about a spoiled kid.

What is it? Yeah, that's exactly what it is. A spoiled kid who has to go back through school, and he starts at grade one and works his way up to get his dad's company. Back to school. Back to school. I think the rich get too many second opportunities, man. So I'm going to go with the other one. Happy Gilmore.

Some guy I remember was, he's golfing. He's down on his luck. I think his parents were pedophiles or something. And then he got the clubs and got out of the house and changed his life. No, man. He's trying to save his grandma's house, bro. He is? Yeah, and Ben Stiller's in it.

I like that much better. Give you a warm glass. Shut the hell up. You can go to sleep. I'm going to put you to sleep. I'll give you a warm glass. Shut the hell up. You can go to sleep. I'm going to put you to sleep. I'll take a warm glass of anything other than Pedialyte right now, dude. No joke, Jeff. Your Pedialyte is warm.

That's the problem, bro. I feel sugar starting to crystallize behind my eyes, dude. I'm not joking, bro. I'm about to fucking cough up a taffy any second now. All right, this one's from Jake Wigan. Cop up some cotton candy. So I say, uh. No, we don't use that for this, bro.

God, that peel-eye's really got you. Put your buzzer down, bro. God damn it, man. No wonder babies are so dumb, dude. The sugar hits you. Oh, my God. That's why it's for just babies, dude. Yeah, dude, I feel like my arms feel weird.

Yeah, they look hairy. They do? Mm-hmm. Oh, thanks, man. He said Billy Madison. Or, I feel like my arms feel weird. Yeah, they look hairy. They do? Mm-hmm. Oh, thanks, man. He said Billy Madison. Or no, he said Happy Gilmore. I said Billy Madison. What's the fans think?

Fans say a whopping 70% for Happy Gilmore. Oh, nice. 30% Billy Madison. And so what we're doing is every week now for Debate Club, we're putting on our Instagram story so you guys can vote and tell us who you think. So you want to apologize to the fans? You got it wrong. Well, I still think, well, do the fans fucking think Happy Gilmore?

I still think Billy Madison. Well, Brendan got it wrong. I guess. What else do we have? Sorry, I'm joking. All right, this is from Jake Wy weigand what's up theo what's up brendan uh i'm jake i'm from rochester new york uh i got a debate club for you guys uh in a street fight lebron james versus floyd mayweather let's go

lebron james versusus Floyd Mayweather You ever seen Floyd in person? Shout out Rochester son, brother Weez That's my favorite radio station My boy Baggins used to be a rapper Up there, he died, he overdosed So I can't hear this It doesn't matter

He's a pretty decent rapper and nice guy I'll say this Floyd Mayweweather lebron james first of all is the tight end is the nfl's best tight end that they allowed to play in the nba because he was too soft to get hit in the nfl so i'm gonna go with floyd mayweather all day floyd is such a more skilled boxer yeah Yeah. I mean, I'm close. LeBron throws baby powder in the air. That's his finishing move. Floyd probably fucked him up still.

Even though LeBron's huge and he's been spoon-fed his entire life, so he's not going to be very tough, Floyd probably still fucked him up. I'll take Floyd. All right. What's the fans say? LeBron James, 59%. Wow.

Floyd made it with a 41. So all of our fans live in Cleveland. That's right. So I apologize to the fans. What else? All right, we got Jeff Henderson. What's up, boys? Coming live from Tokyo.

Damn, you don't know. You're probably thinking, is that guy Japanese? Nope, I'm not. I'm from Vancouver originally. Big fan of you guys. Anyways, debate topic. The Sopranos versus any other TV show ever. Thoughts?

Thoughts, dude. He didn't know us. Thoughts, bro. I mean, Brendan, definitely a male thought. Dude, you're a thought. That drinks Pedialyte and hangs out at playgrounds. You're a kid thought. I spend time outdoors, but you're a male thought. Yeah, it looks like it. You're a thot that drinks Pedialyte and hangs out at playgrounds. You're a kid thot.

I spend time outdoors, but you're a male thot. Yeah, it looks like it. You're a male thot. It's like you got fired from Garth Brooks. Let's see here. Dude, I've never seen Sopranos. Oh, wow. What do you mean, wow?

Dude, you didn't even know what Happy Gilmore was. Yeah, I did know what Happy Gilmore was. You haven't seen Sopranos, have you? Have you? I've seen a couple episodes of sopranos people say it's the best show ever next to the wire i've seen the wire wire's good a little long season three was all right yeah i don't know sopranos so i can't really chime in does anyone love sopranos in here you guys from new jersey so you suck sopranos off

okay but you're from the east coast so So what was it about Sopranos that was so great? All of it. People love it. They say it's like the best mafia show ever. And the head boss tells the story through the therapist, right? They came in the therapist and he's telling like he's a regular dude, shows like his daily life and stuff like that. I don't know.

I've never seen it. I definitely need to watch it. I prefer some shows I like, In the Heat of the Night. You remember that show? It's on reruns now. Is that with Bruce Willis? No.

It had Detective Virgil Tibbs in it. I don't know who played him, though. You know what I'm talking about? I don't know that. Oh, no, you're talking about Miami Vice. I don't know that movie, bro. It's so good, bro. It's not a movie, you creep.

It's a television show. There we go. My boy, Carol O'Connor, is buried over there and right near my house where I live at, near the apartment. But I'll say this. I've never seen that, dude. The man, Dateline. First of all, people say Sopranos has a lot of murders in it. Dateline.

Have you ever seen the show called Dateline? Every episode, somebody gets murdered. But one of the best shows I've ever seen, probably. Dateline? Dateline NBC or Dateline. Oh, you're talking about the news. Yeah. Yeah, people die all the time on that show.

So if you like murder mystery, I like that more than something like. I've never seen this show because it looks terrible. It's fucking terrible. The show looks awful. And also, I'm not 70 years old. I don't hang out with my grandma in her frog neck and watch this fucking show. You are so limited, bro. It's all that you had on TV, huh?

Your mom sent VHS cassettes of this. You just watched every episode over and over. And these are your heroes. I've never heard of this show. That's his son. That's his son on the left, and he died. Dude, I haven't seen one episode of Sopranos, but I can guarantee it's better than that. So I'm going to say Sopranos for sure.

What about, I'll tell you something then. What about Just the Ten of Us? Remember that show? Sure haven't. A lot of hot chicks. Bring it chicks bring it up brother dude you ever seen step by step no i don't watch that kind of stuff oh my god you ever seen step by step look at the day by day this deal brother dude that's a porno bro that's a porno bro yeah it is not hey now see you're drinking pedialyte you're watching this shit dude i, I'm no detective, but this is an easy case to solve. It is, dude.

Yeah, it is. Look at that bullshit. Dude, go to step-by-step, day-by-day, minute-by-minute. You don't know that shit? What, Sesame Street? No, bro. Step-by-step. It would go step-by-step with a hot-ass mom.

Let's see her. Yeah, look at that dimey-dime. That's Suzanne Somers, dude. Yeah, bro. Bro, look at that dimey dime. That's Suzanne Somers, dude. Yeah, bro. Bro, I did an infomercial. I performed at a pyramid scheme one time that she was at, too. I didn't even realize it. Really?

Yeah, I got there. It took me around back. I went out and performed. Then she went up right after me. Did you holler at her? All these vitamins? No. And then I went around front to look and see what was going on,

and I was like, oh, there's a pyramid scheme. I didn't realize. I just performed at a pyramid scheme. There's all these people cheering for vitamins yeah yeah they're like dude remember she had the thigh master she would do that thing in them in them uh in them tights on a jack after as a kid at night late at night oh i think i do remember yes they're step by step then after step by step played they would play aby-step. Then after step-by-step played, they would play Full House. You go step-by-step, Full House. Yeah.

Look at that ass. That's early 90s too, bro. Beautiful adult lady. Mm-hmm. Beautiful adult lady. She had the Thighmaster. All right. You could use that shit right now.

I'm going to say this. I probably could use something to get this butt a little down. I need the thigh tamer. No, you just need some meat back there, bro. Dude, apparently you don't know how to look at another man's ass, brother, because. No, I see yours. When you walked, I thought, man, he has a flat ass. What?

There's no power back there. How do you even walk? No power. If there's a gust of wind, how do you walk into the wind? You just got to go with the wind. No power. I only head east. i can only go east yeah he's got he has no left hand guys he can only go east i've never seen sopranos but i know it's better than any tv show theo just mentioned and probably better than step by step and i'll say any other tv show ever that's i'll go with that all right all right so let's see what

the fans say oh shit, shit. Wow. The rest of the people gave it to the shit on Sopranos, huh? Yep, 68%. Apparently, Just Our Voting comes from Iraq, so that's cool. What else we got? Here we go. You guys will like this one. Cassandra McGee. Damn, McGee. What up, Rat King and Beastie?

I'm Cassandra. What's up, baby? My debate topic is dogs or cats my video ended but I wanted to say love the podcast and keep doing what you're doing damn super smoking hot he seems like a really nice person

chin has a full boner right now do you see his face he goes super hot I just saw the blood leave his fucking face and neck and head down south to help out other parts of his body. Yeah, right? Yeah. Yeah, she's a dime piece.

Thanks for listening. Cassandra McGee. Wow. Dogs all motherfucking day. If you say cats, we cannot be friends, Theo. Cats fucking suck. Cats don't need anybody. You can leave cats.

They don't trust anybody. You just leave them water and food and dip out, and they don't give a fuck. Dogs, every time they come in, it's like the Super Bowl. It's like you're the MVP every day when you walk in that house. Really? Yeah. I never had a dog. I think cats, you know.

Did you grow up with cats? I got attacked by two cats when I was young, and I got attacked by two dogs on my birthday one year. On your birthday? I had a dog bite my ass when I was a kid. You did? Hit me right in the ass. Mm. Sounds like a hot guy.

And I still love him. I still love him. But cats, like you leave cats five or six days, you come back, they don't care if you were gone or if you're there. They don't even notice. They're like shitty parents, dude. That's what I feel like. I agree.

So I'm going to go with dogs. Dogs all day. What kind of voting we got here? Better be dogs. And she has nice dogs, so if you need someone to watch your dogs, let me know, girl. Jesus Christ. We're going to go to dogs. All right, the voting is 87%.

Yes! Dogs. Fuck yeah. Get rid of cats, bro. Don't fucking touch me. Don't touch me. Cat lover. What else we got?

All right, Josh Isbister. What up, Theo? What up, Brennan? Josh here, reporting in from albert saskatchewan canada is in a green room regarding debate djs or live bands the dog licking the back of his fucking head right now it's kind of sick it's a little weird does he have peanut butter on the back of his neck it's canada bro no it's not i've been to canada they don't do that weird shit that's called the canadian live in a green room bro that's called the canadian fucking tourniquet bro you put a little peanut butter on the back of your neck and let the dog lick it off it's not. I've been to Canada. They don't do that weird shit. Why does he live in a green room? Bro, that's called a Canadian fucking tourniquet, bro.

You put a little peanut butter on the back of your neck and let a dog lick it off. It's called a Canadian massage. Yeah, it is. Question was live bands or DJs. Fucking live band. DJs? Oh, look. Here's my iPad.

Everyone's having a good time. Playlist. Hit play. That's it. Go get drugs. Yeah, go get drugs. Go fuck girls. Roofies. That's having a good time. Playlist. Hit play. That's it. Go get drugged. Yeah, go get drugged. Go fuck girls.

Roofies. That's what they do, bro. Can't trust a DJ. Can't trust a DJ. If you want to be the biggest DJ in the world and you're committed to it, next year you could be fucking hosting MTV Spring Break. Yeah. You could do that. Live band?

Come on. Live band. Oh, I like a live band because you could get hit you know you're there next you know somebody gets hit in the head your your date gets hit in the head with a damn drumstick that the guy threw out yeah or the pick from the guitar just boom bitch right in the eye yeah you can't repeat that kind of you know you don't get that at a dj you know what's he gonna throw into the end of the crowd his medium shirt roofies Roofies. Yeah, roofies. So very limited style with DJ. This one's so easy, I feel like.

Yeah, DJs scare people a lot. A lot of them die. That one guy died. They do a lot of drugs. You know you have to do drugs to be a DJ? Yeah. It's like part of the gig. That's true.

You have to lift weights to be a football player? You got to do drugs to be a DJ. So I'm going to say no then. I'm going to say a hard no, live bands. I'm going to be a dj so i'm gonna say no then i'm gonna say a hard note live bands i'm gonna say live bands brother what about the beatles live band 80 live bands hell yeah how are 20 still taking d that's what i'm saying what's wrong with the 20 you ever seen train in person oh they're good dude i've seen google dolls no joke five times dude they're great his haircut's totally disturbing but they're good, dude. I've seen Goo Goo Dolls, no joke, five times. Dude, they're great. Wow. His haircut's totally disturbing, but they're great.

What? The little drummer, the guitarist, the lead guitarist, no undeniable. Looks like a penguin, though. Bring that man up, that beautiful fellow. Dude, I don't think they sing like that. Oh, Clint Eastwood's the lead singer of Goo Goo Dolls? Goo Goo Dolls drummer, yeah. No, Spicy. Spicy Larry, nuh-uh.

Dude, check out the highlights on the lead guitar. On the left, there he is. The lead singer's had a bunch of face work, huh? Oh, yeah, definitely. Damn, bro. He looks like Spencer's threw up on him. Yeah, they look like Spencer's. They literally look like they're sponsored by

Spencer's. That's wild, man. All right. Is that it? We got one last one. You guys ready? Poor Theo's barely hanging on here.

It's J-Rod. I can see what happened to me, man. Yeah, well, I do. Uh-oh. Oh, this is the same old boy. God damn.

Fuck, man. I'm horny. My dick's harder than life. I guess I just gotta... Oh, I gonna do it again, boys. I think I'm about to... Whoops.

Looks like I gotta clean up. But I'm not sure which one's better to use A tail or a tissue You know, I just can't decide This guy's great I'll let you boys play That guy's fucking awesome Made my week

That's J-Rod, boy I love that dude That guy's talented, huh? Super talented I think he's working on Avatar 2 So this is an easy one for me God, boy. I love that dude. That guy's talented, huh? Super talented. I think he's working on Avatar 2. So this is an easy one for me. Okay, let's hear it.

He's going to throw a curveball. Let's hear it. Towel or tissue? Neither. Sock. I grab that old sock, that old Nike sock. Maybe it doesn't fit in with the rest of them. I grab that.

I put my hand like a hand puppet so it doesn't get any on my hand. And then I go, I do that snaky snake along my body. Oh, bro. What do you use? What do you use? Don't do whatever you were just doing. What do you use? Children's blankets? No, dude.

First of all. Children's party supplies? My thing is I don't come anymore, bro. So if I'm hooking up with a girl or anything even, I don't come. I just stop before I'm going to come, and I just go home. Is that what your PO tells you to do? Huh? No.

That's what your PO says? It's not a parole officer. You can't bust nuts? Your PO doesn't let you bust nuts? I'm not busting a freaking nut for some girl that I barely even know, dude. What about dudes? That I met off the internet. What about dudes?

No. Also. So I will say this. Towel or tissue. First of all, a sock is just a towel shaped like a foot, you fucking mammal. Don't you realize that? Yeah, but you can put it, mammal. You can put it on your hand and then just fucking.

It's like a talking puppet that cleans everything up. Not everybody needs a puppet to clean up their seat, brother. But also, as a kid, your parents were like, that's just a sock on the floor. Super crispy. Probably sweating in that thing. But if you have a towel, they know what's up, baby. They know what's up using a ton of tissues. They know what's up.

Sock, they don't know what the fuck's happening. And you got to mix it up. Maybe it's both socks. Don't use black socks. It has to be white socks. Dude, you don't know shit, bro. You don't know shit. You just cummed down the walls at

your house your mom thought it was candles dude but now you bring up candles i will say this a lot of guys if they have a candle by the bed will skeet out into that candle dude you know what the best thing you know the best idea you've ever come up with bust into those lava lamps yeah fuck a sock fuck a towel jack off in the lava lamp. Now you got entertainment. Why don't we make those, bro? Sea monkey lava lamp. Yeah. Yeah. Sea monkey.

Sea men. Sea men monkeys. We got to work on the title. But we're halfway there. We're each halfway there, dude. I think, you know. Yeah, I think. Lava nut lamp.

No. Nope. And then we're going to keep thinking about the title. But the thing is. I made my week, though. I say socks. That's the best going to keep thinking about the title. But the thing is. I made my week, though. I say socks. That guy's the best. That's J-Rod.

J-Rod. But I know this. Definitely not tissues. Don't be an asshole. Save the environment, man. A towel you can reuse, you can wash, you know? Yeah, washing kills the environment, though. No, it doesn't.

The environment's going to die. So we just got to fucking do our best. You know what I'm saying? That's why Homeboy wants to go to mars yeah full circle full circle yeah go to mars where you're gonna die immediately dude stay here you might die i'm just gonna go with homeboy in the truck and jack off in the towels dude look i i used to do the things sometimes i'd even put out like a beach towel a nice big beach towel and jerk off onto that or like i don't like having to clean it all up so my thing you ever jacked off in a hotel

and just roll in the sheets no me neither never done that me neither ever and i don't even like jerking off anymore man so i'm trying not to do it your po says no to that yeah well yeah i'm down i'm not like i mean actually i jerked off semi recently but not that recently but anyhow towel man i can't believe you keep my eyes open dude towel let's go tell him to get you out of before Actually, I jerked off semi-recently, but not that recently. But anyhow, towel, man. I can't believe I can keep my eyes open, dude. Towel. Let's go towel and get through out here before it dies. I'm going to get my legs above my heart.

Wow. Almost half and half. Yeah. 50% towel. Who's using tissues? Tissues. God damn it. Who's using Kleenex like a psycho? Yeah.

Somebody who's doing paper mache. God. Who is it? Somebody. Maybe that's what they're doing. They're busting in it and then making figures out of it it oh i could see that yeah that makes sense it is crazy how much semen goes to waste every day in america when you think about it think about how many loads are dropped right now millions upon millions not thinking about that at all i was thinking about other normal

stuff like what i need to do later today well no you just said think about it yeah just think about how much is wasted i don't think about how many are hitting the fucking floorboards right now. Floorboards? What are you, some sort of savage? What are you, a pirate? Floorboards? What are you, on a ship? What are you, on a cruise ship jacking off?

I'm on the Mayflower, brother. All right, let's get you out of here before you die, and we don't want to get that on camera. I just got to get my legs above my heart. Thank you for listening to King and the Sting. Theo will be all right. I just gotta get my legs above my heart. Thank you for listening to King and the Sting. Theo will be alright. I'll keep you guys posted. Somebody call this is my liver right now.

King and the Sting and Theo dying because he ain't doing sugar. Hey! Ah yeah, it's the bee sting king and the rat king. Rat king. To the strap, baby. Come get it.

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