The Golden Hour - Episode 64: Whitefishing

Episode Date: April 10, 2020

The fellas talk Rich Chigga, Bhad Bhabie, Gangnam Out-Of-Style, Brad Williams Dancing, Thiccc Lord Upstairs, Stranded IG Models, Ikea Ninja's, Fans Voting On Brendan's New Hair Cut, Ass Lipo, Blackfishing, Whitefishing, Thot Topic, Chris Light Brown and much more!Postmates - code: KATS2020Shipstation - https://shipstation.com/ offer code: KATSSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jin looks like the shittiest Mortal Kombat character you can get. Yeah. Finish him. Yeah. I guess finish him. I'm gonna finish him. Get over here. Get over here.

Cup of noodle! Back off my broccolini. Get your life together. It is. Don't touch me, bro. I'm not touching you, dude. Jin looks like he's the elite security for Korean zombies. Damn right.

He looks like, yeah, he looks like Gangnam Outta style. Gangnam style. Gangnam style. Gangnam Style. Remember that little fat trick? And that little fucking egg roll? Gangnam Style. When the world took advantage of a mentally handicapped Asian kid. Yeah, made him dance on YouTube.

Wait, he was handicapped? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh. Yeah, man. That boy was a retard. That ain't natural Asian, bro. That ain't natural Asian, bro. That ain't natural Asian.

Natural Asian comes more. You know it's the most watched music video in history? Like 7 billion views. Yeah, all China watch. So automatically you're number one. Damn. Gangnam Style. Yeah, hook the money day.

And then he'd be like drooling. Yeah. It was sad, man, at one part of it. No, he's not the handicapped one. There he is right there. I think you're thinking of William. And here you go right here. That's him.

Yeah, that's him. No, that's not him. That's Brad Williams dancing to it. Oh. That's Brad Williams. He said, that's him. You thought Brad Williams was Asian? Oh, shit.

He can dance, okay. All right. Wait, what? Shit. Whoa. That motherfucker can dance. No. That's what's up.

He must have a lot of hidden cartilage, dude. He's very flexible. Damn, he can really dance. Look how malleable he is. Look at his knees and his hips. Damn. Oh, my goodness. He's so nimble.

Yeah. He told me that his parents named him... Did you know this? His parents named him Rad Williams. R-A-D. Rad? And he changed it years later. Yeah.

Rad's way cooler. Rad's cool. What was wrong with Rad? I think he just thought it was insane. You know, like, you know, people were trying to always get him to do biking and stunts and shit. Yeah, they wanted to be in Jackass right away. He was like seven.

Yeah, he comes out of the... Dude, put hot sauce in your eyes. He's like, dude, I'm eight. Because your name's Rad. Eat these thumbtacks, man. Dude, jump off this cliff. I'm six. Yeah, everything's a cliff.

Oh, shit. That's a kid joke. I mean, when you're six. That's a kid joke. Yeah, that is a kid joke. Easy, easy. That's a kid joke, bro. Oh, okay.

I took it the wrong way. Because he still has six height in him. He's got the height of a six. He's still got a six. That's the spear of a seven footer though you feel me oh that's it yeah he stands tall oh if you crack him open dude he's off the charts man like a catberry egg real sweet yeah he's in the 2000 percentile you crack him open bro cream full of cream boy well you hide that little dessert cup you just hide i downed it

dude yeah the second time i cheat on my diet today i thought it's the lord it's the thick lord's work i've been good i've been good i rode my mountain bike seven miles this morning and i've been on my diet and then i got to the coffee shop and i i just i can't turn down pancakes dude they said you want some these free pancakes i went free this is the thick lord upstairs shining down on me. I'll take them. He wouldn't know where free pancakes are. I'll take them. And I get here, and Nick has fucking banana pudding.

Oh, yeah. That shit is fantastic. This is beautiful, huh? Man. And where'd you come across this dessert, Nick? My lady made it last night. She's been baking a lot. Finally got her hands on some flour.

She's just bored as fuck baking? Mm-hmm. Dude, a lot of women better start tightening up those old school skills suddenly. She just bored as fuck baking. Dude, a lot of women better start tightening up those old school skills suddenly. You know what I'm saying, bro? Start doing the laundry around the crib. Doing something. A lot of fucking ladies just stranded, dude. You see a lot of Instagram models just trapped in their apartment, laundry everywhere.

Sad. No flights, nobody going to Tulum. Nope, not on that yacht anymore with their ass cheeks out. Welcome to real life. Welcome to real life. Ain't got them skills anymore. Yeah, welcome to real life, little Dorothy. Okay. Haven't had that quarantine dick in seven weeks.

Yeah, haven't had that old senior citizen pecker in a while, bro. They having to pay their own bills, dude. Starting to get real itchy. A lot of women reading the directions on a box of oatmeal right now. Trying to figure out how to fucking. Trying to figure out them Totino pizza rolls. Don't microwave my shit either, bitch. They get too soggy.

Dang, you like fully baked, huh? Oh, you got to bake them, man. They're already cheap. You know, you put them in the microwave, those things get real gushy. Yeah. They're like Gush You put them in the microwave, those things get real gushy. Yeah. They're like Gushers, but pizza filled. Yeah. I don't trust anybody that bites into them right out the oven.

Neither some psychopath. Dude, who can eat those that hot? It's lava in your fucking mouth. Yeah, you're just like, oh, yeah, I want to take a fricking ride with the devil, and you bite into it, and it just sprays oh it's like the big bang that started the entire universe in the back of your throat dude when that pizza when that totina's bust in your mouth that lava but dude third degree burns on the roof of your mouth dude ain't nothing worse brother ain't nothing worse bro my buddy got third degree burns on the inside of his eyes from having a tuxedo's roll bro when they came out with sauce

only no pepperoni in them it was just well it's a pizza gusher dude dude some of it came out the back of his neck bro that's how hot it was he doesn't have a throat or anything anymore man it's bizarre i repeat the other night. The dude came to the house, dropped the piece off, rang the door and fucking ran off. I'm like, dude, God damn. He don't want the tip. He didn't want nothing. He's so scared of fucking that Corona.

Rona. That Rona. Yeah. What's going on in the urban community? Chappelle, are you guys hearing a lot about the coronavirus? What's happening with it? Are black people as scared of it as white people and others? I think we seem to be good.

I don't know. I mean, shit. Dude, this isn't a racist thing. I was in Englewood the other day. Hey, what's up? Yeah, I was in Englewood. Doing what, dude? Chilling.

What, your car got stalled out over there? No. Like, what brought you over to Englewood? A friend. Roscoe's Chicken. the line was wrapped around i mean they don't give a fuck yeah they don't give a fuck no mask nothing no living no man they're living i saw one black lady with a football helmet on i'm like is it raiders was it the raiders uh it wasn't. It was a high school team. Oh, right. Was it Long Beach Poly if I had to guess?

If they add one more. Take a whack at it? Yeah. Let me take a whack at it. Was it Long Beach Poly? Yeah. Was it Crenshaw High? I don't know what it was, man.

I said that shit ain't stopping. Actually, if I was a coronavirus, I would not fuck with that lady. I wouldn't at all, man. Corona scared of black people. I could see that. I fear so. Especially black women. Black people and kids. Yep, I could see that.

I'm just glad to be here, man. Amen, bro. I'm glad to see you guys, man. Don't touch me, dude. Because we can't. But we can. We kind of can. Yeah.

Don't touch me without gloves on, man. Dude, can I see that Gangnam Style video? Look at Chin, dude. Oh, Jesus Christ, bro. He has a scarf with the mask. Scarves for later. You look like you're about to rob a noodle bank. What do you look like?

What is that? Is that a panty? What is that? Is that a real mask? It's a real mask. It's disposable. So I can only use it for one day. Just one day and it's got to go.

Are you serious? Yeah. You look like an Ikea ninja. Yeah, one day, next one. And why is that? Why is it like you? Why you can't use it more often? It's exposed to the elements.

Once it goes out, I can't use it again. What elements do you mean? Airborne stuff, viruses, germs. Man, fuck all that, Rona. Dude, I was on the trails this morning. I'm a mountain biker now. That's all I do. I was on the trails.

I saw a big old, I was telling Chappelle, I saw big cat prints in the mud. Really? I was so scared. I took my headphones out. Did you really? I don't have knives or nothing. I was like, what the fuck am I going to do? You got to get a was so scared. I took my headphones out. Did you really? I don't have knives or nothing. I was like, what the fuck am I going to do? You got to get a piece, man.

You got to get something. You got to get something. You got to get handy with the steel, bro. Put a piece on your bike. Who's going to say, oh, that guy shouldn't have a gun on his bike? You're right. You're right. I got to do something.

I can't kill that thing with my hands. Bro, it's scary. I went for a run one time in the woods somewhere. And I remember at one point it started getting dark i ran too far and had to go back you know and i got to the finish line and i was like oh fuck dude the finish line's way deep in the woods i gotta go back so and i started getting real dark as i got closer to my car and it was like just hella woods brun i was like dude this is i'm i am if i'm a cat bro i, I attack me right now. That's how cold case file starts.

Every cold case starts that way. Yeah. Go on a light jog. Yeah, it's usually a white lady. You didn't get your sweatshirt at a kiosk at the mall. Somebody made this. Who made this, Nick? Ooh, let me look that up.

He was a fan. He was actually in here because he was doing some meeting. Designer man. Did he spray paint it? Does he have Tourette's? He's actually a really hot street designer, I guess. He was here with some clothing company, actually Teddy Fresh, the H3 people. They have a streetwear brand, and they were trying to do a collab,

and he walked past and he saw Theo's office. That's cool. He had it in his car. He made it for Theo. Oh, damn. That's cool. You don't know who he is? in his car. He made it for Theo. Oh damn, that's cool. You don't know who he is? I will find it in. I was just playing about Tourette's.

I was trying to roast Theo. That shit's pretty dope. If you want to make a bee sting one, I'll rock it. I know, huh? It's kind of nice. The inside feels soft, man.

How do you feel? Get in there, bro. Okay. That's standard. Dude, I remember being all high one night trying to hit on some girl and I didn't,

I was too fucked up to talk and so i um she had on like a sweatshirt and i remember taking my fucking hands and like putting them up or sweatshirts to see how soft they were in your head you're just trying to see the quality of the sweatshirt no no i'm trying to like touch this lady oh okay that's creepy but a lot of her body was in the sweatshirt okay and what's she doing oh how can i talk to the you you know, I can't really talk. Yeah. So I would just be like, aw, and then kind of put my hands up the sweatshirt. That's assault, brother.

Dude, it's, but we still, we talked for a little while, but after that. So it worked. It kind of worked. Did she start laughing? Huh? Or was she like, get your hand out my pocket? Dude, she wasn't wearing a football helmet. That's a Malcolm X reference. I know, that was a Malcolm X reference. she wasn't wearing a football helmet. That's a Malcolm X reference.

I know, that was a Malcolm X reference. She wasn't wearing a football helmet. And R.I.P. Malcolm X as well, dude. Yeah, for real. There's a good documentary on Netflix on that. Very shady. Dude, I remember I was hitting on a girl. My crush sat next to me in fourth grade.

Earth Science, I'll never forget this, right? And I was like, oh, it's the start of the year. And they probably call her crush because anything that big bitch sad on choice were overalls and she had blonde hair her name was something Lee you know like like three names something like Kathy Lee something I remember it was the middle was Lee really and I was so excited she's sitting next to me and I was finally gonna talk to her but then I could i felt like this this raisin sized booger in my nose i'm like oh before i holla i'm just gonna and i was like you know i remember watching

a movie in class it was dark and praise god i was knuckled deep in my nose and then i felt this i felt this raisin right and then i was like where the fuck did it go my god whatever oh i hate and i'm like what's up girl so this shit is crazy she She goes, oh, my God. I go, what? She goes, oh, my God. You have a giant booger right here. I'm like, what? And I felt, and this thing was just here. Oh, yeah.

Dude, game set match. She was like, see ya, dude. You had that fucking, that boogie. What's that basketball player's name? Boogie. Boogie Collins. Boogie Cousins. No, Boogie Cousins.

You had that Boogie Cousins, bro. On your fucking brim, son. Dude, game set match. Oh, yeah. It's hard to hit on a woman with a booger on your face. I want to be like, shut up, bitch. God damn. You know, in some countries.

You know I made a mistake? During starvation, people eat their boogers a lot. I feel sick. Is that what they do? Yeah. This is the designer, Nick? This is him right there. Your boy right there, Real100Tech.

That's that real street wear there, bro. Yeah. So shout out Real100Tech who dropped this off probably almost a year ago maybe. Oh. Nine months ago. I thought this was recent. Maybe it wasn't a year ago. We've only been here since July 1st, so maybe December.

Yeah, couldn't even have been a year ago. It's been a hot second, though. A year ago. Years ago. Oh, he's got that Tiger King hitter, too, he's got up there. Where? That third one on the bottom right, that kind of dark blue. Damn, there's a lot going on, huh? Yeah. Oh, that's pretty dopey.

I'm fucking... I'd rock the shit out of that. You heard him, Real100Tech. Oh, I hate that thing, dude. Bro, you know what I'm thinking about, man? I'm thinking about getting maybe one of those things that sound perverted, but they're good. Panini, bro. Really? Yeah, you freak.

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You know what I'm saying? Yeah. She got 95 different haircuts going on. And don't give a fuck. Yeah, she got that attitude. Oh, damn, bro. All goddamn day. I, she got that attitude. Oh, damn, bro. All goddamn day. I want to ship a dick pic to your mom, bro.

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That's ShipStation.comcom then enter the code cat yep click on the microphone at the top of the home page click and type in kats that ship station i said that and enter code kats ship station.com make ship happen dude tiger king you're releasing a bonus episode. That's what I heard. Dude, I got a friend who knows the girl, the nanny. Remember that badass nanny? You don't remember the badass nanny? Remember he hired her and was like, oh, I'm proud of her. From Tiger King? Yeah.

You don't remember that hot-ass nanny that the other dude hired? Jeff Lowe's nanny. Jeff Lowe's nanny? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You know her? A friend of mine knows her. No way. What did he say?

Not real. Really? It was fake? A friend of mine knows her. No way. What did he say? Not real. Really? It was fake? She's a bottle service girl. Oh, really? She never slept with him or nothing. She's not even a real nanny. Damn.

That's the word on the street. How you gonna bottle service but you can't even bottle a baby? You know what I'm saying? Well, you drop a bottle, it's all good. That's accurate. Dude, if you bottle a...

You drop that baby. Yeah. You got problems. Then you end up like Gangnam Style. Yeah. Well, fucking, I don't know. Hey, is Gangnam Style, would you consider him a one-hit wonder? No, he's big in Korea.

How many views is that, Nick? 3.5 billion. Is that it? 3.5 billion. How much can the counter go? How high can the counter go up to, do you think? I think just 9 billion, 999 million, 999,, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, 9, yeah everybody can dance to there's some like horrible it's the macarena this is basically this is the japanese macarena bro 100 macarena mexicans you can have that

this is chinese what do we have i remember when i was korean is he korean korean wow i had no idea but here's the thing korean needs to join another group because y'all keep bugging they're gonna street racing yeah yeah yeah dude y'all keep fucking street racing. Yeah, dude. Y'all need to Tokyo drift into another culture and merge. Which is one thing aren't good at doing is merging. Y'all need to collab.

Y'all need to fucking collab, bro. Because everybody knows too, a lot of this Asian beef is hitting the streets these days, dude. People used to think, oh, all Asian people. Here's how it went. People thought, oh, all Asian people areian people are japanese and then people realize oh that's not true that's fake so then now you start realizing they got japanese chinese now japanese chinese lao oceans taiwanese creatine creatine creatinees yeah the creatine creatinees i've heard that yeah dude and they're jack and they're fucking dripping from their elbows yeah you know they got water in the meat but they're fucking but they're good people but they're good

people really good people yeah and then now people are starting to realize that the chinese have beef with the japanese and the koreans have beef with the fucking and the north koreans hate south koreans yeah people are starting to realize that there's a lot of disparity in the uh asian community in the asian community whereas people used to think you know ignorant people and i'm i've been ignorant we used to think that oh it's just asian people you know remember when we went to australia there's so many asians and i finally got good because i'd be like god there's a lot of chinese people and i'm sorry i'm sorry sir i sorry sorry sorry chin sent that but we went

there chin I couldn't believe how many Asians were and I'm like yeah there's a ton of Chinese people on her chin back dude there's Japanese yeah then we'd go through us like dams a ton of Japanese be right like dude those are Korean yeah by then oh I got it yeah but then what are these people what are these people boom you got a boom Japanese Chinese Korean and how do a lot Asian people in Oh, I got it. Yeah, but then what are these people? What are these people? Boom. You got it. Boom. Japanese, Chinese, Korean. And how do a lot of Asian people in the black community interact? I've never really even gotten a read on that. Rush hour.

Really? Yeah. Come on now. Asian people drop the N-word, though. We've been over this. We were talking about it earlier. Like a lot of Asian rappers, they'll drop the N-words in songs and have a black dude in the song with them. It's so uncomfortable.

There's a popular Asian rapper who changed his name to brian but he originally came out as rich chigga really chigga chigga chigga's fair i'm not mad at that rich chigga there he is rich brian now well it's brian rich chigga yeah gang bro i think i remember him actually rich chigga i remember seeing a dude with Chigga, and I thought that that was pretty... Pretty ballsy. Checked out. I thought it was pretty brave. I thought it checked out.

Do you have some videos? Yeah, let's see one of his hits. Oh, here we go. I think it says Tokyo Drift on it. I'm not trying to be funny. I think it does. It does. It does.

Oh. Oh, this is a freestyle. Oh, shit. He's nice on the cups that I say I'm making a million you making mistakes to you and your bag. Well, I'm in a suitcase Besides doesn't matter. That's what you're gonna say. I'm back and I'm other fucking bitch Like a blanket and cancel them what did they go? What did they go? I'm talking about the rappers that I want to get a smantle grip, but you short like a motherfucking candle I ran through like seven kind of in the middle of the day

If my mama heard this song I wonder what the fuck she'd say No, not my angel Not my angel Mama got the Jimmy and I'm sitting good as hell It's a freestyle, man. I'm safe with every beat, thank you I do not spread it unless it's a fact I wonder if he, do you think he made this beat all himself and everything?

Not the beat, the beat's very famous. I thought he made this beat all himself and everything? Not the beat. The beat's very famous. I thought he made the beat with the cups. No. No. Oh, that's interesting, man. That's cool, bro. That shit was fire.

That shit is fucking dope, dude. And he's a young man, huh? That's a young strapping man in LA bored as fuck. Yeah. That's pretty creative. Tyga released a quarantine song. He did? Yeah.

Boys are just bored. They get in the studio and start dropping them mixtapes. And that's not even the studio. I mean, that's just in his apartment

just doing visual shit. That's a creative little dude. Now, Asian people can do anything. Anything's kind of allowed and Asian stuff is cool, right? As long as you're good at it.

You can't do anything half-assed. As long as you're the best at it, it's fine. You can do whatever. But you better be damn good. Yeah, you better be damn good. Math, gymnastics. But I mean, like even these videos, he's balancing napkins on his neck.

You guys are good at breakdancing? Yes. The best? Yes. Yeah, come on, man. You haven't seen Asian breakdancers? Hold up. Better than like the New York Street Boys?

Yes. Dude. The New York Street Boys are Asian. Okay, I'm sure they are oh jabalakis they're all they are all asian a friend of mine is married to one yeah they're all guess who the best number ones are what what ethnicity korean obviously koreans are yeah otherwise you wouldn't say anything and that red bull break dancing competition yeah they always went red bull break dancing competition yeah man huge you gotta get out more. Can you breakdance? Huh?

Do you get that fat ass out there on the court? I can do a couple of stuff. You ain't no Brad Williams. Huh? Yeah, I agree. Brad Williams can fucking dance. Yeah, but I could do some of this shit. I could do that.

Oh, oh, oh. I could do that. I could do the kind of breakdancing where you're always waiting for the guy to go on the ground and do something he never does. Yeah, me too. And I just keep waiting to jump. He just does it all up top. You know who can fucking breakdance is F're like always waiting for the guy to go on the ground and do something and he never does. Yeah, me too. And I just keep waiting to jump. You know who can

fucking breakdance is Fahim. Yeah. Like a motherfucker. I think he was a real breakdancer, wouldn't he? Really? I think so.

Oh, I hope not. It's a horrible fucking career. Pretty sure he is. There's just no end game in it. No, how do you make money? It's like being a cheerleader.

Where does this end? I guess you could be Jabberwockies, but chances are not good. Cheerleader, yeah. Here's Fahim's for him right here he can dance dance oh yeah he can oh yes he's so fucking funny his face is so ridiculous one of a kind man he's a one of a kind yeah you've known him for a while yeah at the store you've known him for maybe yeah seven years time just flies yeah he's always been

so funny man god he's so funny he's been doing uh stand-ups since he's i think he said it's like since 18 he started in uh i think portland seattle and he was like and but his parents were like really strict and he had to go to school he's like a biologist or something he's wicked smart yeah he's aviation yeah he worked for uh engineering he worked for bowen yeah yeah he was building fucking bombs or whatever planes but for the good side but for the good side yeah for the good for the right side the right yeah fahim man war if you guys get to see this guy live man it's fucking absolutely ridiculous hilarious yeah he comes from his own lane he's a he just dropped a well just but about a month ago dropped a special did he on uh comedy central youtube wow yeah that's a shot in the belly room i know it's

just unfortunate to put anything on comedy central youtube well you just gotta get it out there you know that's true but i'm sure he had a deal where he's able to put it out Comedy Central YouTube. Well, you just gotta get it out there, you know? That's true. But I'm sure he had a deal where he was able to put it out himself too. Faheem's really, really smart. Like, I'm sure he could put the clips out himself. Wicked smart. No, I'm not saying any clown on it is special, but fucking Comedy Central is a fucking nightmare.

They're a nightmare right now. They got rid of David Spade's show, Lights Out. That was the best show on there. The best quote I ever heard about Comedy Central, Amy Schumer told me one time, she goes, if you gave them a gold brick, they would bronze it. That's what she said. I'm just pissed.

I had a good pilot with them, brother. We worked really hard on it. It's hilarious. I'll vouch with you on this. I saw Theo's pilot and I was like, dude,

this is going to be the biggest thing you've ever done. And they said, nah. So this is my chance to say, fuck y'all.

Dude, I feel bad for you. We get more views on here than they get on the David Spade show. Yeah, I know. But that Spade show is fantastic. But after a while, we're after years and years of them saying, oh, yeah. Years ago. Yeah. Man, I'm sounding like a hater.

It's all good, man. No, you're not. You sound like a guy who gave him a good opportunity and they passed on it. Yeah, it just took him a year. Just all the jerking around and the slow shit and just... Yeah, I guess it did make me kind of mad. Well, that's fine.

Because they just jerk you along the whole time. Yeah, don't say jerk, though. Yeah, sorry. They just kind of pull you along by your dick slowly. I like that better. I knew you were better than that. I knew you were better than that.

My bad, bro. My bad, dude. Damn, dude, I keep looking over and think that Chin's about to fucking rob a... About to rob a fucking Target for their cup of noodles. Yeah, dude. Which is a joke I used a little earlier, but that's okay. Did you?

Yeah, dude. No, you didn't. Did he use that exact joke? He had a noodle bank. Oh, no. Target for a cup of noodles? No, but still. Same.

Same. Same lane. Same No, but still. Same. Same lane. Same lane, but different. Same lane. I feel like mine was better. I feel like mine was a little more creative. I think it might have been a little more specific. Here's a white guy that has a concern.

Let's go to this guy. Oh, what are we doing right now? We're hopping into King it or Sting it. Thank you guys for having me here today, man. I just want to say that. I've never been so grateful. This is Alex from Racine, Wisconsin. Nick's neck of the woods, and I got king and her singer for you guys letting your girlfriend give you a haircut all the barber shops are shut down right now and i gotta keep my grooming on point um so yeah i'm gonna let her

give me a mullet she has no type of haircut experience at all oh then she'll be able to handle this before it looks like i'll hit you guys back with the final product. Clip, clip, buzz, buzz. Oh, wow. Oh, shit. Damn, his shit looking frosty. She did a great job. Oh, damn.

Throw in a little cotton eye, Joe. Oh, shit. Drinking a beverage. Is that a fresca? Is that a natty ice? Dude, great. Wow. That's a beverage. Is that a Fresca? Is that a Natty Ice? Dude, great. Wow. That's a good-looking young man.

She did a great job on that haircut. Nick doing anything he can to squeeze Wisconsin into the episode again. Let's take that to note for two things, bro. Cheese and Stephen Avery, dog. Okay? Cheese, Stephen Avery, and Nick. And what's that guy? who's the big running back that played in wisconsin ron dane their new running back's actually better than him though yeah

they have a history of great running back well let's see but it's ron dane it's ron and so uh you definitely know it's right the new guy the guy who's coming out this year is a fucking he almost won a heisman uh yeah you You know what I'm talking about. Yeah. I'm going to get torn apart because I'm blanking right now, but I got a lot going on back here. But, yeah. You know what I'm talking about. I forget his name.

Wisconsin always has the biggest white guys. Everybody forgets his fucking name because Joe Burrow won the fucking Heisman, you pieces of shit. Nobody's remembered some fucking dude trudging up there in the mud, playing fucking. Behind all giant white boys. You mean the Dallas Cowboys with his offensive line? John Taylor. He looked it up. And I want to say

he did look it up. And Chin would vouch for it if we could get any idea what Chin's thinking right now. Chin, you cannot cover up. It's hard enough to know sometimes what Asian people are thinking or feeling. And then you cover up 60's hard enough to know sometimes what asian people are thinking or feeling and then you cover up 60 of your fucking visual territory that we're supposed to draft ideas from

it's a tough go in here man holy fuck dude they keep looking at you for answers we got no i can't tell what's going on with Jim and how my glasses getting fogged up to No, if they get fogged up you're gonna die You'll fucking go back into the database dude you gotta tighten up No, bro, I'm sitting over here with Marge shot This shit is getting She looks like the shittiest Mortal Kombat character you get marred shots thick sun over here. This shit is getting out of hand, bro. She looks like the shittiest Mortal Kombat character you can get.

Finish him. I guess finish him. I'm going to finish him. Get over here. Get over here. Get over here. Cup of noodle! There you go.

Finally, Brendan fucking coming with a joke, bro. Tony, Ben, what episode are we in? 64. 64, man. Wow, bro. Oh, man. We're here with fucking Marge Schott's side piece over here. 64 64 man wow bro oh man over here with fucking March shot

side piece over here fucking Crisco Sabo over here Crisco Sabo this dude played

what are you talking about this dude played vending machine guard for the Cincinnati Reds

over here let's get into this fucking episode man Baheem's hilarious go check him out if you get a chance go watch his special on Comedy Central The Cincinnati Reds over here. Let's get into this fucking episode, man. Dude. If I hear it's hilarious, go check him out if you get a chance. Go watch his special on Comedy Central. Comedy Central's YouTube page.

Yeah. Or watch it on his Facebook when he puts the clips out there, man. Well, he's already put them out, but he needs the views. Yeah, gang. Can't understand letting your girlfriend cut your hair. You got to be careful, though, because all these bitches will give you that fucking simple jack mullet, man. You got to be careful. I won't let my girl touch my hair. Really? Mullets are looking pretty dope, dude you that Fucking simple jack mullet man You gotta be careful

I won't let my girl Touch my hair Really? Mullets are looking pretty dope dude You got everyone doing mullets now man Bro I'll say this man I got that little cape Down the back though

That shit's getting A little long man What's coming in Now what are you gonna do With it though This is where you have To make a choice I know I don't know what to do

I'm not gonna let it go long I don't know what to do What do you mean then You've already said You're not gonna let it go long I'm not gonna keep growing it Like I'm in a rock band. Grow that shit, dude.

Get that Clay Matthews, huh? Really? I don't know what to do. Get that shit, dude. I know I got to decide. Once this quarantine's over, I'm going to switch it up. Well, you could thin it. I think just keeping the top.

Don't let the top get too long and let that back go long, man. You don't want your son to never see you with a fucking long hair. You're right. You don't want your son to be see you with a fucking long hair. You're right. You don't want your son to be like, oh, my dad looks like a fucking lesbian all the time. You want your son to be like, I have some pride in my father. Look at his fucking beautiful hair. Yeah, you're right. When you're right, you're right, dude.

Yeah, look at you right there. Dude, when you used to have long hair, bro, years ago. That boy is. That's so funny. What? That boy is so dirt. That boy is so dirt. He's soaking wet.

He leaking. He's leaking. He's soaking wet. Go to his face, man. That's our fucking boy right there. That is our boy. This is Brendan on the DL, bro. This is me if I fucking ever got my shit together.

Yeah, bro. That boy is so jacked, I wish I had his body. Let's go to another picture. Yeah. Look at him holding those dumbbells. There you go, dude. I'll give you this. Wow, bro.

What the hell? Dude, that boy. Look at that dick root, bro. Oh, my. Look at that Gold's Gym dick root. I'll tell you this, though, too. As good looking as he is, he's also like a legit trainer. He trained Verdum.

Like, he's a legit trainer. He trained who? Verdum. Verdu? So, Verdum. Larry Verdum? Larry Verdum. I don't know that guy. You know that guy? No. Great name. like a legit trainer trained verdum like he's a legit trainer he trained who verdum for brie so verdun larry verdum larry verdum i don't know that guy no great name oh no this kid i went to school with him larry verdun no he didn't train larry verdun yeah bro he trained uh he was the youngest person in our community ever to get scabies and that's a senior citizen disease we looked that up next scabies and he beat Or he's still fighting? I would say they're definitely in overtime.

He's in the 12th round with scabies? He's had it for a long time. How'd he do it? But yeah, look at that. Oh, yeah. Oh, scabies is a little bug? Dude, I got a fucking tick on me from mountain biking, man. Really?

I think I'm going straight to my nutsack. What do you know? What kind of biking are you doing? What are you doing? Mountain biking. Really? Yeah. Go to my Instagram. Look what I posted, man. I mean, I'm out there, bro What kind of biking are you doing? Mountain biking. Really? Yeah. Go to my Instagram.

Look what I posted, man. I mean, I'm out there, bro. You should get a bike and go with me. What? I'm so lonely. How many fucking sports are you going to go through? I mean, all of them. You're mountain biking now?

Yeah. It's right behind my house. Dude, you're going to end up in full contact chess before this is all over, I feel like. That'd be cool. Wow. Look at this, man. That's right behind my house, dude. Oh, wow.

That's that specialized hitter there. And did you take the Peloton? Did you unhook the Peloton? Or is that... Wow. That's a real bike, huh? Full go, dude. That shit is a work out.

What's that shit in your mouth? That's a gel pack. That's a fuel, man. That's how I get up that goddamn mountain. Oh, okay. That's crazy. What else you got, Nick? Yeah, let's get i get up that goddamn mountain oh okay that's crazy what else you got nick yeah let's get into something here huh what was that guy yeah you got to get i think you have to go full on the cut man you got to get a good cut it's a good time to maybe we should let fans vote on what kind i should do dang look at brendan Are you scared? Could be a bad idea. Well, fans voted.

You're getting a mohawk. Fans voted you're getting a sex change. You're like, what the fuck, dude? Yeah, they started to go fund me. There's $100,000 for you to rip your dick off. Yeah, yeah. We were just going to install tits, but if you want to pull your dick off as well, man.

We're just going to install some tits and give you a rump like Theo out the back. And you got to split the earnings, so it's only $50,000 for you and $50,000 for me. You just get the sex change. Theo's just good. I'll just monitor it. Theo's going to get lipo on his ass.

A nose job wouldn't kill you either, homeboy. That's my third cheek, bro. I'm just glad this thing still works, bro. What's this little young fucking... What's this young fella want? It's a joke. She's cute, man. You're fucked up. She's a joke. She's cute, man. You're fucked up.

She's very cute. Let's start this over and turn up the volume. Dude, there's nothing sexier than a nose piercing. And let's see what this beautiful young lady wants right here. No, no, no, no. No, no, no, no. Come on, man. Okay, I'll give you that.

Okay, yeah, let's see what this little fucking hipster thirst trap wants. What do you got, dude? Let's see what this little Bjork fan wants right here. King it or sting it. Bad baby showing up on her IG looking like Cardi B. What do you guys think of the trend blackfishing? Gang, gang, buzz buzz. Trend blackfishing?

Yes. Oh, it's where you dye your skin? It's opposite of Sammy Sosa. So you know how Sammy Sosa wanted to get really white? It's when white people want to get black. It's such a bad deal.

It's when other people of other races try to look more black. Yeah. I didn't know that was a thing. Bad baby did it? I'll bring up her Instagram in a second.

In the past, people have said Ariana Grande has tried it. It's just like a bunch of tan and people can't tell. Kylie Jenner is accused of it a lot. They think it's racial profiling. They think it's culture vulture. Yeah, the appropriation.

Get the fuck out of here. What? I've never heard of this. People can't be tan now? I can't get tan? For girls, it's usually the tan, the lip fillers, like the long hair. Yep, sign me up. Hey, is she of age yet or not?

No, she is 17. This is bad, baby, right here. She's still 17? She's a... Let's go. We'll kill this. Any small talk is... Let's go.

Let's pretend she's 18. That bitch is bad. She is 18. She's 22 or 3. Maybe. No. Didn't you do a music video with her, Theo? Yeah.

Did you engage with her at all? Engage? No, she was a child. Why you got to ask him like that? Engage. Like, was there any interaction? When you ask if a child, if an adult and a... Hey, hey, you want to have a seat?

Child, huh? You want to have a seat? Yeah, have a seat. Which is funny because of what Theo played in this video. Yeah, he's a creep. Oh, yeah, played a pedophile in this video. You and DeLeo always get casted as pedophiles. Yeah, yeah.

Dude, I did. I want to tell you one funny thing that happened on this video set. I don't have the video, but I'll have to find it. She makes good music, man. Huh? Her music ain't bad. Well, here's what happened. David Spade hit me up and said, hey, you should do this music video with bad baby right and so i was like oh man well obviously you know

i want to impress david spade this does and she had just put one out that he was in that was really good so if you look up that one he was like a milkman in it it was really dope and i was like oh this seems you thought you'd be something funny in it so i thought it's gonna be cool yeah so then i get there and they said oh we use a pedophile and i said nah man that's this is a rumor you know they said no that's your character yeah and they said that's your character boy you got all defensive you got no proof yeah like what that's a character those videos are fake man well no no what so this was hers oh this was hers. Oh, this was hers with Lil Yachty. Lil Yachty.

That's a rumor. That's a rumor. Come on, man. She's doing the damn thing, though. Bitch, I'm fly as a bird. Take a picture, get your issue, bitch, a dime a word. Walk in the bank, fuck it up, poke it up, bitch, with a shake. Fuck it up.

I'm about to look at your bag, make a double bag and grab a tab. You Gucci flip-flops, fuck it, hit your bitch and massage. This a big white top. Dude, from Dr. Phil to this, how can you hate? This was great. Hi, little girl. You're so cute. Is your mommy home? Bitch, I am my own mommy hi little girl. You're so cute. Is your mommy home bitch I am I'll mommy to fuck um so mom Joe ugly-ass milk trying to poison me and shit. I don't know where the fuck got got that milk from Definitely ain't on no fucking couch I'm gonna go and come back She's a dork

Yeah this video is great So then anyway Yours was good too though man I ended up being a pedophile On a different end But yours was a little creepy Like yours wasn't funny Yours was more creepy

There was one funny outtake Where I called her a wigger during one of the takes. Did she get mad? Huh? Did she get mad? No, she died laughing. And it was, I have to find the video. I had the video somewhere. They didn't put it in the video.

Can you release the outtakes or no? You getting in trouble? I'm sure I can. What are they going to do? They'll kill you. What? Oh, shit. Here I am behind the scenes being a pedophile right there god damn

that is a pedophile if i've ever seen and that's me also my god the fact that i'm making a behind the scenes video in a bathroom doesn't help either so but uh but anyway yeah so that was the deal but yeah there was one great moment right oh this is it it was during this scene and where'd the wigger joke come in at? It was just, they're like, okay, just make fun of her for like 30 seconds. And you're like, you little wigger. I was like, you fucking wigger. And they're like, cut.

Yeah, cut. We don't need that here. We don't need that energy here. The whole set died though. She died too. It was probably about the funnest time, the funniest moment on it. I saw her once at CA with a security guard. So she is white. I was hoping she would say what's up, I saw her once at CA with a security guard. So she is white. I was hoping she would say what's up, but just a security guard did. She was white.

I mean, she's transitioning now. How do you feel about that? I mean, I think she just looks tan. I don't think she looks black. I don't know. Show me the black. She has some bangers, though. Look at Theo.

Yeah, I'm just playing a fucking pervert. You look great, though. That's Bella Thorne, right? Yeah. Ty Dolla Sign, too. Was he on set with you? Nope. The only person that...

45 million views, son. Damn. People hate on this girl, man. I celebrate her. Going from Dr. Phil to this. Career's booming. Booming. You got to see the behind the scenes.

Definitely her mom was there running the show. She had a whole team. Just a different universe. Different universe. Good for her, though. Yeah. She was pretty nice? No.

She was exactly like she is on these things. Oh. She was just caught up in that little world, you know? She's, like, young, like, you know, gangster, like, money in the bank now, like, rapper. Yeah, like, every girl that's not her fucking is just talking shit outside of a car wash somewhere in Tucson right now, okay?

Like, so that was the vibe. Like, if you're not her, but you're, like, basically just talking shit outside of a car wash in Tucson. Yeah, like, all the girls you see at, like, a fucking Hot Top talking shit outside of a car wash in Tucson. Yeah, like all the girls you see at a fucking Hot Topic. But she made it. Yeah. She has skill. Like Thought Topic, basically.

Wigger Topic. Yeah, dude, I'll have to find that video, though. It's pretty fucking funny. You should post it. Oh, I was so excited, bro, when I did it. Oh, music videos are the shit i love that you're in that one no i was excited when i yelled wigger at her that's so funny i wish i would have kept that yours is great delia's is fantastic with uh fucking logic and

eminem oh that was good it's great yeah dude i love i love logic i love logic oh fucking chris nailed it black fishing are they you see you guys seeing a lot of that in the black culture? I've never seen it. What does she look like? Does it upset you? I don't know what she looks like. Well, she was white. Now she's just real.

Look at her. Yeah, I mean, it's the girl from the video, and then that's her. That's her. Oh. Here's my thing. If that's what she wants to do, who gives a flying fuck? Is she using the N-word? No. Right. I think if that's what she wants to do, who gives a flying fuck? Is she using the N word? No,

right. She's, she's acting, you know, uh, that's what she surround ourselves with. You know, she doesn't really look black.

She looks good. I'm assuming she's 18. You said 22. She's not, she's definitely of age now, man. She was 16 when she was on there. That was 17.

Are you sure? 17. Is that right now? Is that confirmed? I looked it up this there. She's 17. Are you sure? She's 17? Right now. Is that confirmed? I looked her up this morning. I don't want to get in trouble either. Well, she...

Well, you fucking didn't help us. I said, and you earlier... She's a good-looking human being. On the show, I said, what?

He left y'all hanging. I think that this child is out of her fucking mind. That's what I think. I mean... She needs to put on some clothes and act her age. Yeah, this is unbelievable, man. Yeah, this shit is out of her fucking mind. That's what I think. I mean. She needs to put on some clothes and act her age. Yeah, this is unbelievable, man.

Yeah, this shit's out of control. What else you got, Nick? Yeah, let's get out of here. Yeah, let's get out of here. Hey, please get me out of here. Jesus. I don't care. Yeah, look black.

Go ahead. But she's looking black. Yeah. Go ahead. Do your thing. Yeah, on to the next thing. But what about people looking Asian? People that are crossing over, you know?

People that are Asian. Have any white guys got their eyes done to look Asian? Yeah, you see some of that. Because Asians get their eyes done to look white. Yeah, a lot of... I feel like more girls are doing the, like, Melania Trump thing, where it's just, like, the facelift makes you look a little more Asian. You know you don't have to do...

Kat was like, a lot of girls are doing... Kat has round eyes, though. I know. She has very big eyes. Why do I have to do that? Because... I'm sorry? Yeah, pedophile. What do you got to say to yourself now?

Now you're an Asian file? No. Cat's eyes are already Asian. What does that mean? Cat has eyes from her own body and head. And region where she was born. She was born in America, weren't you?

Yeah. You know what I'm saying. Where your parents were born. What do you mean San Jose, dude? What't you? Yeah. See? All right. Well, you know what I'm saying. Well, your parents were born. What do you mean, San Jose, dude? What are you talking about, guy? Get me out of here, Nick! Get me the fuck out of here, Nick. Jesus. We got a lot of good King Earth Stingets.

Let's do another. Jesus Christ, man. Hey, what's up, Tito? What's up, Brandon? Tito and Brandon. From Modesto, California. Damn, gang. G-Eazy's really hit rock bottom. This is Tito and Brandon. From Modesto, California. Damn. Gang, bro.

G-Eazy's really hit rock bottom. Disc golf. Do you king it? Do you sting it? Because, I mean, I come out here at 8 o'clock in the morning, drink a couple tall boys, smoke a couple joints. Gang shit. Play 18 holes. I'm done before noon.

That sounds fun. Ooh. Ooh. Real note, Theo. It was good seeing you in San Jose Improv last year. Gang, gang, buzz, buzz. Oh, shit. Got that buzz disc.

You got that buzz disc. Buzz Lightyear disc, Doug. Fucking buzz baldron, dude. That guy's killing it out there. He hit that Carl Malone fucking post up. God damn. Did you see that shot? Disc golf, have you played it?

I've never played it. That sounds fun as hell, though. You can't go on the golf courses right now, though, right? And do they just go on, like, regular golf courses and throw discs? No, there's, like, an actual course for it. Oh, it's that big? Yeah, I've done it. Man, I need to get more hip.

If you go to, like, Colorado, they have, like, really well-groomed ones that have actual greens and, like, lakes and stuff. It gets pretty serious. Yeah, that's where I'm from, dude. Yeah, I need to check it out. Brittany just looked at a map. She's like, oh, yeah, that's where I'm from, dude. I've never played, have you guys?

Yeah, I just play my first skate video the other day you put on the Instagram yeah bring that shit up did you have music playing like all the small things and fucking do it all? Because I'm a blink 182 fan. Oh, okay. Travis Barker's my boy. All right. Let's see this. Can't hear it.

Too loud. Dude, that music is intense. That's intense music, huh? It's probably fun to skate to though, right? Oh, yeah. It's the best. It sounds like white supremacist music No, they're from Sweden

Huh? Are they? Is that not the track from fucking American History X? No Oh, you can skate skate Yeah Oh damn, son

That wasn't an ollie Jeez Oof You thought I was joking? Yeah Oh, damn, son. That wasn't an Ollie. You thought I was joking? Yeah. Yeah, we did. That's exactly what we thought. Yeah, we thought you were full of shit.

Well, we hired you to be a black guy. So, I don't know if we fucking We need stronger I need to look back over that resume There was some fucking red flags In that thing I thought you were joking There's some black flags Now we know what is so cool

With blackfishing He wants more people to skate with Uh okay Get me out of here Nick I need more like Sam He wants more people to skate with. Okay. Get me out of your neck. He's more like Sam. Man, I hate y'all. I gotta go back over that resume. Dude, I need to re-look at my racism chart.

My chart's all fucked up, man. You're an outlier, bro. You're an outlier, bro. You're an outlier, man. You're like Bad Baby, dog. Yeah, man. You're fucking white fishing. Yeah, dude. Talk about fucking culture vulture over here, dude.

Yeah, bro. Save some for the rest of the white kids, man. Yeah, man. God damn, dude. get your big ass out of that skate park yeah dude dude cheerleading melvis yeah man when does it stop bro it doesn't it doesn't makes you know he's on the guitar yeah i play the guitar i post a guitar video at night, man. Get a gold chain or something, bro.

Yeah, man. What is he talking about, guys? What? What's this fucking Duck Dynasty dude talking about? What? What's up, Brendan? What's up, Theo? Coming to you from Key West, Florida.

Got a King Utter stinger for you. Fresh coconuts. Them nut hitters. Hey, gang. What? Oh! I love that, dude. Man, that dude's got that power saw, bro. Do you know more people die from coconuts falling on them than they do shark attacks?

Huh? Nah, dude, that's something you read in one of those toilet books. Look that shit up. That's not real information. That's what Bad Baby told me. Oh, yeah. Oh, God. That, yeah, well.

I got it from her Instagram. What? I love coconuts. You know what my mom used to do when I was a kid? This is fucked up. She used to buy me a real coconut with the hair all over it. You know, like the real fucking coconut from the store. And then give me a butter knife.

Like, have fun. Dude, it took me hours to get that motherfucker. Hours. Kept me busy, though. I'd be in the basement just fucking doing work. Oh, damn. Took me hours. Damn, really?

I know. That was my daycare. That's crazy, man. Yeah. It's kind of fucked up when I think about it. Yeah, it sounds fucking illegal. First of all,

these people are stealing coconuts out of, obviously, some rich person's yard. I don't know if you noticed that from the video or not. Look, stealing fruit from people? I'm all about it, Tom. Yeah, me too, man too man oh it's called

death by coconut man i thought this was a dessert it sounds like that sounds like a cool band yeah yeah it does you can have that yeah i'll take that uh what what is this guy's problem his girlfriend won't call him what's his problem he wants his girlfriend to cut his beard i don't even know what we're talking about anymore dude We're obviously on the last episode Of this show Before we get shut down You guys like coconuts Huh

I do I do man Since I was a kid I loved them I love coconut water I like the meat I like all of it I like coconuts You break them open

They smell like ladies Lying in the sun I don't know that song Huh What's that from I just made it up okay no it's from um i like coconuts you break them up is that a bob marley thing no it's asian i'm trying to remember this asian guy he's always singing to me i like if you gave me a massage or

what huh after a massage you break them up, they smell like lettuce. I like coconuts. I think it was Asian. It might have been a black guy, actually. I like coconuts. You break them open, they smell like lettuce. I don't know this song, dude. Oh, it's Widespread Panic is what it is.

And here's a brother right here, some fucking white guy trying to be black. Who is this? Oh, that's some fucking white guy trying to be black. Who is this? Oh, that's Chris Brown. Moving on to relationship advice. That's Chris Light Brown. Damn, now this guy is mixed well.

Yeah, he's a good skin tone. This guy has that skin tone. Don't mess with it, man. Don't mess with it. Yeah, do not do anything, bro. Don't fuck with the paint job. Don't do dude don't do anything keep that shit caramel what do you got and then this is brian coming at you from jacksonville florida aka waxonville gang shit do a relationship advice um me and my wife were expecting a baby september 3rd super excited about it but the hormones are through the roof i don don't know. She cries about everything, or she's super happy

about some things, or she's angry at me for nothing. I try to blow her off, but it's like... I don't know, bro. You can't escape. It's insane. How do you deal with the emotions? I know this is more for Brendan, because he's probably the only one with kids there.

Two awesome babies. What do you do? I try to blow her off what else can i do we got about five more months or six more months left you're in the thick of it son help your boy out bang bang bust nuts gang shit bro dude i tell you what here's the other thing girls will blame it on the pregnancy. A girl might just be an asshole. Really? Yeah. Wow. Yeah, Mike, listen.

The only advice I have for you, I just booked fucking city tours. I just booked tours. I was on the road every fucking week for nine months. Oh, dang. Nine-month tour. As soon as she got pregnant, I went, see ya. Because she was mean, man. Really?

Oh, yeah, mean. What would she do? She would eat Flamin' Hot Cheetos and rub her fingers in my eyes and shit. Oh. Yeah, dude. Damn. because she was mean man really oh yeah me what would she do she'd she'd eat flaming hot cheetos and rub her fingers in my eyes and shit oh yeah dude damn yeah they're fucking bitches man good luck bro that ain't that bad dude pick up a hop dude pick up a hobby like mountain biking and just be gone for hours yeah but what if he wants to take your chance with the rattlesnakes because they're nicer. And what did he say?

He said she's what? It's hot and cold, man. Because their body creates more hormones because of the baby. And they have all that hormone going through them. So they just fly off the handles over anything. Breaks my heart, man. It's crazy. And what happens to the baby?

You know, in nine months he comes out and he's cool. Fuck. It's crazy how something cool comes out of all that fucking nightmare. To make diamonds, you got to go through a little pressure. Damn, that's true. Gang shit, bro. Good luck, brother. Good luck out there, man.

Pick up a hobby, man. Pick up a hobby. Yeah, stay in your car. Do postmating. Dude, become an Uber driver. Yeah. You don't need the money. Just do it.

Uber driver's risky though Postman, you can leave This shit out there on the curb You know, you could leave it Yeah, true Uber's probably taking a hit Right now, right? Nobody's trying to get in those

Those Ubers always You Uber, don't you? How is it? It's fine Oh, business is a booming? Well, I don't think it's a booming Only Uber when I do this Do you find that it's quicker

To get Ubers now Or not at the same time? It's pretty quick. It is? Yeah. I Ubered for like eight months. I had no car. I didn't have a car.

Yeah, that was a terrible idea. But I thought you were driving Uber. Do I look like I drive Uber? Damn, bro. No, I thought that's what Theo said. I never said anything like that. I've just been sitting here. When I said something like that, man.

Because you said you Uber. Huh? You said to him, you Uber. Well, I know he Ubered here. No, he said you you uber huh you said you said to him you uber well i know he ubered here oh just use uber i thought maybe you're just doing uber as a side gig bro i wish i knew how to fight yeah well i wish i knew how to skateboard so what else you guys two ships passing in the night bro fucking barely larking over here let's fucking get this thing going dude have we started yet yeah we'll close it out with some That's two ships passing in the night, bro. Fucking barely larking over here. Let's fucking get this thing going, dude. Have we started yet?

Yeah, we'll close it out with some debate club. We started yet. Ooh. Yo, Theo, Brendan, debate club. Friday Night Lights or Remember the Titans? Gang, gang, buzz buzz. He looks like he's in a jujitsu gym. Yeah, he does, man.

Are any jujitsu gyms still open right now or no? Nope. Wow. Can't be. That's crazy. The pros are still getting the work in, but the classes, you can't do it. Dude, I saw a black guy in the park by my apartment yesterday trying to fly a kite, and it was a fucking... Was there any wind?

I don't know if there was wind or not, but it was the most... I don't think there was. And it was the most fucking weirdest thing I've ever seen in my life. Kind of depressing, right? Yeah. It seemed like an erectile dysfunction video. Like one of those. It would get you down.

It was just like, it would go like 12 feet or 8 feet and just fucking crash, bro. Fucking sad. It was unbelievable, man. But it's different times, bro. Especially if there's black dudes flying kites, bro. That's when you know the fucking, this is the end. Was it Chappelle? I don't think so, man.

You sure? Act like I don't fuck with kites, bro. Yeah. Come on, have some fucking respect, dog. You think our fucking roll dog right here fucks with kites, son? You don't know shit. No, I said act like I don't fuck with kites. Yeah, he definitely fucks with kites.

Dude, you don't know your man over here. Yeah, my bad, my bad. Of course he fucks with kites. Yeah, y'all didn your man over here. Yeah, my man, my man. Of course he fucks with kites. Yeah, you ought to do your research. I didn't go back over that resume. I didn't even get it. I never even saw the resume. Me neither.

I just hired him on the spot. What? He's dark. I hired him on the spot, dude. What is this guy? He's what? Remember the Titans or Friday Night Lights better movie?

This is an easy one and I'm going to let it, let's start in the culture corner. I know where you guys Has everybody seen both shows? I've never seen Friday Night Lights. What?

I've seen the movie, not the show. What? I've never seen either. You haven't seen the show? Mm-mm. You haven't seen it? You've seen it.

It was on CW. Yeah. Bro, you've never seen Friday Night Lights? I haven't seen the movie. Bro, go watch Friday Night Lights. Bro, during this thing, you're thinking, what do I watch?

You watch Ozark? Ozark's a fucking piece of shit. Ozark's the same episode over and over again. Oh, don't ruin it for me. Huh? I just started season two. You'll be fine. Yeah.

It's the same fucking thing. Let me guess, they're trying to hustle laundry money for the cartel? Yeah. Yeah. It never ends, bro. It's exhausting. It's fucking, the show is so exhausting exhausting it's like we did it and they're like oh good job now 50 million like oh fuck dude

it's basically 30 episodes trying to decide if the sister is hot or not that's what i feel like oh yeah yep is she of age huh she of age yeah she does have that one sex scene in the boat she does season one oh i don't i think i don't know if his wife's a little fucking Is she of age? Huh? Is she of age? Yeah. She does have that one sex scene in the boat. She does? Season one. Oh, I don't know. I think, I don't know if I saw that. His wife's a little fucking tramp though, isn't she? Well, I mean, yeah.

You know? So watch Friday Night Lights though. Bro. Dude, remember the Titans? Yeah. And remember Hayden Panettere's little girl in it? Bro, remember? She knows defense and shit?

Mm-hmm. She's like Nick Saban. Remember the back of my dick, dude. Strong side, left side. Strong side, left side. Friday Night Lights is the best. For me, it goes Breaking Bad, Friday Night Lights.

You haven't seen it. I haven't seen it. I know Chin hasn't seen it. Nick, you've only seen Remember the Titans. Yeah, I've seen the movie Friday Night Lights, and I read the book back in the day when I worked at the library in high school, but I have not seen the show. Way to throw that in there. Way to dry my erection up.

Damn, bro. Way to bring this show to a screeching halt. He was trying to brag about that, too. You see the way he said it? He was employee of the month twice. No, I wasn't. I hit him in the back. They hated me.

Oh, damn. Did you steal books and shit? I just read magazines and newspapers. Dude, are libraries still booming? Not really, right? You can just read shit whenever you want. What? You can just read stuff online or get the book online.

You don't have to go to a library. I think you bring up a good point. That makes sense. What? I think you bring up a good point. Yeah, like why would anybody go to the library now? First of all, I'm not gonna listen to you have a discussion with Brandon

about libraries, okay? Bro, that's crazier than fucking Chevelle being black, dude. Okay? Not by that either? Nothing checks out here. Nothing is fucking checking out in with the rug rats fucking hoodie on

right now sweet hoodie bad baby fucking right what else you got Nick That doesn't. Why would we even drive over here? How'd I get here, man? Yeah, dude. Oh, man. That banana pudding was good, man. That shit was tasty. It was real good. Shout out to your lady. What's her name?

Jules. Oh, yeah. What's her last name? Fan. Jules Fan? She's Vietnamese have you met her family yet? yeah her dad cut my hair

wow look at fucking shit in some tribes that's like a dowry bro you're in bro he doesn't speak much English I just showed him a picture oh this is like 90 day fiance this is sick she Day Fiance. This is sick.

She's born and raised OC, so she knows. We understand each other. Whatever, bro. This is like 90 Day Fiance. Bro, in some cultures, that's what you get. You marry the daughter, you get a haircut. I'll take it. I was struggling.

You guys saw me last week. You did a good job, huh? I'll take it. I was struggling. You guys saw me last week. You did a good job, huh? I'll take it. I love how Brendan kind of gives a compliment, but then finishes it with like a request. Hey, you did a good job, huh? It's shorter. I'm just trying to see how he feels about that.

I don't know about you. You're waiting halfway in with this could be decent. But you're keeping one foot on the fucking land, baby. Checking the water, bro. Checking the water, dude. Oh, man. Chin cuts his own hair. Oh, yeah.

Undeniably, bro. And if he doesn't honor his parents, he cuts his own throat. Let's fucking be realistic, bro. Let's fucking be realistic bro let's fucking be honest what did they see this episode they're gonna ask you to slit your wrist jen bro i just had a vision the cops come in like two months from now and we're all dead in here except for jen isn't he's gone he's missing he hasn't said shit not once. Not once. Yeah, he has. We can't fucking hear him. He's been talking the entire episode. Bro, one thing I don't like about the mask is you smell your own breath all day.

Yeah, your shit's fire, huh? You're finally learning, huh? Oh, it's so bad. I'm like, Jesus, this is disgusting. Yeah, breath can be pretty funky. What else are you guys hearing? That the virus is going to end soon? Anybody got any intel?

Well, baseball's coming back in June Basketball's going to come back Sure, dude It is What? Yeah, they made a deal They're going to do it in Arizona All teams are going to play there

Really? Goddamn, dude Yeah, where do you get your fucking news? From Nick I was just telling these guys before the show About the MLB coming back Oh, yeah, you were That's why I'm wearing the baseball jersey, man.

I'm fucking crunk for it. Arizona's perfect because Arizona's just chilling. I mean, they shut things down, but they make golfing an essential. Oh, wow. They're saying the disease can't live there. Why? Because of the heat, right? Because of the heat.

Meanwhile, our pussy governor wants to shut down until fucking June. Yeah, next June. Fucking guy. Suck it, dude. That guy, bro, beat his ass. What's his name? Gavin Newsom. Fucking guy. Suck it, dude. That guy, bro. Beat his ass. What's his name? Kevin Newsome. Kevin Newsome that used to play for the Toronto Blue Jays?

That guy. Oh my god. He's the governor now. But he really was a baseball player? I don't think so. That's Ozzie Newsome, yeah. I hate it when you have one guy that's good and you get a different person with the same day. Like, you know, that kind of shit.

Confusing. Yeah. Shout out to baseball. Shout out to UFC leading the way, though. They're the first ones to do it, April 18th. Shout out to baseball, man. Shout out to baseball. Some real hitters out there.

Shout out, I don't know, Joe Musgrove, baseball fan, baseball pitcher, watches this show. Walker Bueller, pitcher. Shout out to Yellow Wolf pitcher, watches this show. Walker Bueller, pitcher. Shout out to Yellow Wuff. He watches the show. Does he? I think. I could see him watching it.

Me too. Shout out to Tony Hawk. That makes sense. That makes sense. Shout out to Hawk from NWA. Those old wrestlers. Shout out to AJ Hawk. Ohio State linebacker. Green Bay great.

Captain. Shout out to... Shout out to Hawk, the guy from Gigalos on Showtime. Oh, really? You know a lot about Hawks. Shout out to... Who else man Kat you wanna shout anybody out

Shout out to Rich Chigga Oh yeah Can we end on Gangnam Style I keep wanting to hear that fucking song Gangnam Style Rich Chigga started this all off Rich Chigga doing the damn thing Got them Gangnam Style He had Chigga started this all off, bro. Rich Chigga doing the damn thing. Got the Gangnam Style!

He had one more hit though, too. A real banger. After this. Oh, fuck. Look at him. Dude, don't let anybody tell you can't do anything. Look at this fucking guy. Oh, wow. Look at him. Unbelievable, dude.

Wow, look at him. Unbelievable, dude. And this guy's homosexual or not? About to bet on it. He is good. Look at that little kid. He's awesome. That's the dance. I will say this.

He did make this a thing, bro Yeah, this is Yeah Anybody can do this Yeah, but he did it This is universal Now it is, yeah Yeah

If you see somebody do that You know they're gonna Fucking gang him, bro Bro, there's nothing more Fucking beautiful Than a fucking fat Asian I agree And a nice towel

And a steam room Something relaxing about it Look at this, bro Fuck yeah and a nice towel in a steam room. Something relaxing about it. Look at this, bro. Fuck yeah. Bro, we gotta get this guy on the podcast. There we go. I think he passed away.

Did he really? No, he didn't pass away. I think he did. Bro, he gotta get this guy on the podcast. There we go. I think he passed away. Did he really? Oh my God. No, he didn't pass away. I think he did. Bro, he's touring. And he only played this song seven times in a row? Yeah. The video's good, dude. This dude took fucking over.

Just an Asian girl with no ass? That's every Asian girl, dude. Or Japanese women. Not a lot of cheek in that Japanese area. Dude, if you got an ass as an Asian, Jesus. Look at this guy, dude. Who is that, Ellen? Oh my God.

Oh, wow. That's crazy. Hey, that's Theo and Brendan right God. Oh wow. Hey, that's Theo and Brendan right there. Hell yeah. Yeah. Oh, that's me in the cool car. That's Brendan, dude. Hey, he has one more hit though, Nick.

He has another hit. Does he? Yeah, a real big hit. He has one more that was a fucking slap. I think he has a song with Snoop Dogg, too. It might be Snoop. I think Gentleman. I forget.

It was big, though. Oh, look at that with the calves out, too. There's his Barquan impersonation right there. Oh, there it is. 1.3 billion views. Wow. You see it? And I think you're right. Who else?

There's somebody in it. Damn, this guy's got hits. This guy's a fucking killer. Slappers. This is why he followed up With Gangnam Style With this shit How old is he?

47 And this one's in Asian This song sucks Where's he at in Shanghai You think? Seoul? If he's in a fashion area That'd be Japan right? This one's horrible Shut this area, that'd be Japan, right?

This one's horrible. Shut this one off, please. This song sucks cock. Damn, what? Small cock. That's crazy, man. Crazy. 1.3 Bill views.

Yep. Shout out to Gangnam Style. They're really starting it? They're starting it. All teams are going to be out there playing in Arizona. No crowd. What? And then football is starting just – they're going to be regular season.

Camp, everything. In Arizona? No. Everywhere? Just everywhere. Well, that's crazy then. Why is that crazy? Why do they get to do everywhere but then baseball has to do Arizona?

Because their season doesn't start until August. Oh, I see what you're saying. Arizona gets hot, man. Arizona. But yeah, the other places don't. So what if they can't do it?

They will. They'll figure it out. You don't know it. You don't know shit. You don't know less than shit. Good one, dude. All right.

I feel you, bro. It checks out, bro. I think that's it. That's it, man. Thanks for the banana pie. I think that's it. That's it, man. Nick, thanks for the banana pie pudding. You're welcome.

Yeah, shout out. What player is that? Is that a specific player? Just Reds? Gang shit, bro. Just celebrating the whole league right now. Really? Yep.

Got to respect. Oh, my friend Mike Clevenger's got traded to Cincinnati Reds. Really? Yeah. He was a pitcher for Cleveland. Shout out to Mike. Yeah. I'm just joking he didn't,

but if he's listening to this and he hears that, he thinks that he did, that'd be fucking hilarious. It'd be funny if he gets traded now. He's like, what the fuck, bro? Well, you can tell we don't want to leave, but we have to. This could be the last episode, man. Might get shut down.

Yeah. Do people know that we're meeting like this? I think some people do. I think everyone knows. I don't think anybody cares. That's true. No one cares. Have we had anybody that said shut it down?

I haven't. No. Maybe some bitch ass fans in Chin's family. I'm keeping it alive. I'm wearing this so people know we're being careful. I like that that I'll lick Chin's fucking face right now

I don't give a fuck about Rona dude remember when Steve Rannazisi died in 9-11 dude so look man if that can't stop us bro

Rona can't fucking stop us that didn't stop Steve uh uh dude that was so crazy. We gotta do something better than that, man. We gotta fake our own death.

We gotta. We could do it. We could do it. You're gonna have to hide, though, bro. That's tough. I know. You're gonna have to hide. What the hell are y'all talking about?

We're talking about faking deaths right now? Yeah. This is what it's like, man. You wanna be fucking now? Yeah. This is what it's like, man. You want to be fucking White Chappelle? This is what it's like, bro. Just boring fucking conversation. How can we die, you know? How are we going to hide our deaths?

Black community can fucking die whenever, bro. You know what I'm saying? You guys can pop off whenever, dude. Yeah, dude. White people, yeah, you're creative. How do you think they wrote Ozark? We have to die of old age don't die out there y'all yeah you gotta stay alive man if it's the last thing you do

kick ronan the nuts. We're out. Yeah, bro. Okay. Brennan and Theo, fighter in weight. I got to go in and go hard in the paint. I do not think. I am in flow. Black rifle coffee. I'm ready to go. I need a sponsor. I am a monster.

About to open up with this at my concert. Flow is contagious. Brows are outrageous. Thicker than girls that are Instagram famous. Damn. Hungry like I'm fresh off keto. Seeing red like Andrew Santino. Every song I hit like the great Bambino

Brennan ate the queso and the quesoritos, but everything's gonna be fine Hate on me. I do not mind Looking like the type of dude that got a pack of matches in his pockets at all times They sliding into my DMs a couple of you try but couldn't beat him quit playing like Nintendo DS You don't want to smoke like Joey Diaz Meaning y'all edible just got my eyebrows threaded and I'm feeling incredible Brennan's son hit me up He said it's too loud in the club Can you pick me up?

King and the sting King and the sting King and the sting Bee sting rat king King and the sting King and the sting Got the bees in the trap Got the bees in a trap, got the cheese on a string King and the sting, king and the sting King and the sting, bee sting, rat king King and the sting, king and the sting Got the bees in a trap, got the cheese on a string

Brandon and Theo, fighter in Creole Shout out New Orleans and shout out to CO Colorado, more specifically Boulder Brendan came in with a chip on his shoulder But it's still gold and yet it's still fire If you don't like king in this thing, you're a liar Brendan's got like a thousand different hustles One of them's at Nordstrom, racked to entire

Black Rifle Coffee, we hear you loud and clear Your son on the email, like please get me out of here It's way too loud in here. Watching the Irishman eating pizza, drinking half a beer. Now on to Theo Vaughn. Looking like the type of dude that tries to read us songs. Smoking cigarettes with a snapback on. About to hit the crib and turn Snapchat on.

It's all good. We still mess with you. 1811 Pico Boulevard. Go get that hit. Derek and Kat. Y'all doing great. Thursday upload. Not a minute late.

Y'all wanted to rap. I had to demonstrate. Brand new studio. Y'all feeling great Thursday upload, not a minute late Y'all wanted to rap, I had to demonstrate Brand new studio, y'all feeling great Putting Chris Delano in his place Now let's go and get you in a game King in the sting, king in the sting King in the sting, bee sting, rat king King in the sting, king in the sting

Got the bees in the trap, got the cheese on a string Oh, yeah. Got the cheese on a string.