The Golden Hour - Episode 67: Korntine

Episode Date: May 1, 2020

The guys talk Snakes, Security Thots, Fat Boy Bike Club, Thriving In The Cold, Spencers Gifts, Paul Walker & Paul Wall, Korn vs Corn, Famous Fathers, All New Rap Battles featuring the first Female Rapper and the return of Lil Brow's, History Lessons from Oat Milk 40, Scottish Accents and much more!Hims - https://forhims.com/kats5Athletic Greens - https://athleticgreens.com/katsMyBookie - https://mybookie.ag/ promo code: KATSSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

You really trying to get Rob Zombie to direct your special? I tried to. Oh, he's not into it? He couldn't do it. Too busy. Yeah, he couldn't do it. What was his... Actually, he might have charged too much.

I couldn't remember what it was. Nah, it doesn't sound like you wanted to do it. Um... Damn. Shit. Dang, dang. Buzz Bones! Back off my broccolini.

Get your life together. It is. Don't touch me, bro. I'm not touching you, dude. You want one? I want a gusher. I like the gushers. All out of gushers.

Really? Yeah, you want fruit by the foot? Yeah, I'll do that. Yeah, I thought so. What? You can't even throw, dude. Fruit by the foot. Bro, throw it back to him.

I know, right? Were you a cheerleader? What's up, bro? I can throw if you want. What's up, bro? Drew Breezy. Oh, no, dude. Drool Breeze, bro.

Drew Breezy. You're like a transgender ninja. What are you doing, dude? Hi-ya! Hi-ya! You look like Drool Breeze, bro. You threw that bitch like you've been in a wheelchair in that. What are you doing, dude? Hi-yah! Hi-yah! You look like Drool Breeze, bro. You threw that bitch

like you've been in a wheelchair, dog. No, bitches in wheelchair, that's all they can do is throw. They can't kick, though. Don't ask them to kick. Don't ask them

to fucking kick, bro. You're going to be fine, dude. You guys are idiots. What's up, doggy? Oh, not much, man. Getting through these quarantine times? Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That little security thought at the front. Make sure you have your mask on. Yeah? Yeah. Was he giving you a hard time? No, because I kind of put it on, and they looked at me, and I pulled it down, hoping to argue with them. Oh, yeah?

Yep. But he was like, whatever, dude. I get paid $7 an hour. He was racial to me, I felt like, because he thought I was black because of this mask. He's like, what are you boys doing around here? He's like, what's your con doing around here, boy? And you're like, dude, I work here. And I was like, dude.

And he went, oh, shit, my bad. Like, oh, my bad. My bad. I was like, what do you want me to fucking, you think I can just dunk all of a sudden? Just because of the mask. You just run away all fast. Yeah, you're out of your mind, bro. 4-3-40. You want me just run away all fast. Yeah, you're out of your mind, bro. A 4-3-40?

You want me to freestyle for you? Jesus Christ, man. Yeah, it's been chilling, man. Not too much, really. I hear you, dog. Almost got bit by a rattlesnake today. Did you? Almost ran right over it.

I posted that bitch. You should have ran over it. I don't know. This thing was thick. Let me see that thing. That's not that big. It's not small. That thing's gorgeous.

I've seen way bigger than that. That's what she said. I'm breathing pretty hard now. Oh, yeah. It was a nice little break, to be honest. I don't take many breaks. Yeah. I think it's thick, though.

That part sounds unrealistic. Another one, boys. I don't take many breaks. Yeah. I think it's thick, though. That part sounds unrealistic. Another one, boys. I see him all the time. All the time. That thing's slow, huh? It looks pregnant. He didn't give a fuck, dude. Well, it's probably A, a woman, and B, it's pregnant.

He stopped, stared at me. I was like, all right. She would be pregnant. I don't know if it's pregnant, man. Everyone says about every thick snake, oh, it's pregnant. Oh, really? Oh, that thing's pregnant. Oh, really, crocodile hunter?

Huh? Oh, really, crocodile hunter? Dude, I grew up in Louisiana, bro. You're saying crocodile tears? You don't know fucking snakes, bro. Dude, that's a long raccoon where I'm from, dude. Those things are everywhere. That's nothing.

That's a stretched out raccoon? Yeah, bro. That's dinner for the Vons. That's nothing, man. That's a pair of snakeskin boots for the Vons. Yeah, man. Hey, here's my thing. If I get bit by that, I'm about 40 minutes from home.

Would I die, you think? I'm too big to die from a rattlesnake bite, right? I don't think you want to go home. You want to go to a doctor. Dude, I can't get to a doctor on my bike from there. I'm in the middle of nowhere. You could if you tried hard. I'm just saying saying if you say you

can't yeah you're never gonna do it yeah you're right would you watch jaca this morning huh that drink you start spitting out fucking motivational good talk i'm just telling you what's going on bro i've been up since 4 30 doing what lifting bro oh Lifting curling. What are you lifting? Huh? Pills into your mouth? Weights, Russell. Weights, dude. Really? What kind of weights? Bro, you look like a straight up semen hit man on a Navy battleship, dude.

You're dressed like a fucking... Dude, you look... Bro, you look... Nice chain. You look like you give back rubs at a rap battle. What are you talking about? Bro. Sick flow, bro. Who else wants some?

This is vintage steel, you idiot. Whatever Malibu's most wanted. Sweet outfit, dude. Hey, was it your chain from Spencer's? Spencer's has some good shit, doesn't it? Yeah. Why are you pointing at me? Why is Chabelle kind of shopping at Spencer's?

Obviously shopped at Spencer's, dude. Chappelle looks like a security guard at Spencer's. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right, kids, easy on the Rick and Morty stuff. Yeah, he looks like a security guard that hides stuff in the store so he can buy it later. Oh, man, hope they don't get all these Gwen Stefani dolls. And this is the last large laugh of this Rugrats tee. I'm going to save this. Yeah, man, I hope they don't get all these Gwen Stefani dolls. And this is the last large laugh of this Rugrats tee. I'm going to save this.

Yeah, man. I got to hide this sucker. And these slinkies are hot in the street. I'm just going to put one under the shoe rack over here. Hey, put one of these behind it. Oh, yeah. Hold it back there. I'm going to come get it.

Damn, dude. Is that a new Nirvana shirt? Bro, you look like a guy who gives CPR to somebody's cock on a battleship, dude. That's what you look like, dude. Oh, my God. You look ridiculous right now, dude. Bro, you look like a first responder at a gay gangbang, bro. Trying out the boys?

Yeah, dude. All right, everybody, hi, Jake. Yeah, yeah. All right. Who needs a red bull, huh? G up, baby. Who needs a red bull? Carl, dude. All right, everybody, hijack. Yeah, yeah. All right. Who needs a Red Bull, huh? G up, baby. Who needs a Red Bull? Carl, another Red Bull for you?

You look pretty exhausted over there. Get out there, buddy. You're doing a lot of work, buddy. Yeah, yeah. Great technique with the motorbikes. Yeah, dude. Get out of here, man. I do?

What are you talking about? You're ridiculous, dude. Bro, you look like you make grilled cheese for fucking Andy Dick. Why are you dressed like this? Did he make you dress like this? You're wearing a woman's shirt, first of all. Dude, you stole your grandma's hat. Like a blouse.

This is a banana hat. Hey, did you come in on a skateboard? I might have. Dude, I look nice, I think. You do look nice, dude. What are you talking about? You're lying. You just said all that other stuff. No, I I think. You do look nice, dude. What are you talking about? You're lying. You just said all that other stuff.

No, I'm not lying. You look nice, dude. You just said all the other stuff. You don't think I heard it? I apologize. You don't even know how time works, you idiot. I was just here with you. Freak.

We got a video right here that came in from somebody. Let's see what's going on. This is our first King of the Stingin'. Oh, gang. What's up, guys? This is Aaron Beatty from Xpand. I'm out here on the ranch in Idaho. I got a King of the Stingin' for you.

Ice bath. Oh, I love them. Oh, yeah. A goaties. A goat love ice. Oh, this is Brad Exotic. This shit's dope. Gang, gang, buzz buzz. A goat love ice. Oh, this is Brad Exotic. This shit's dope. A goat love ice.

Beautiful goats. You ever jumped on an ice bath before? Yeah, man. I love them. Dude, I'll go under. Me too. I love them. You won't go all the way under.

I'll go all the way, dog. No, you won't. I thrive in the cold. I love it, dude. I love it. Dude, if you thrived in the cold, you would have stayed in Denver, dude. No, dude. I thrive in the cold. I love it, dude. I love it. Dude, if you thrived in the cold, you would have stayed in Denver, dude. No, dude. I thrive in the cold.

Not at altitude, bro. Get your facts right. I told you this. Both of them are the same thing. I told you this in a text. I said I don't do well at high altitude. Well, I don't think you did tell me that. Okay?

I don't think you did tell me that either, dude. I don't think so either. But now you know, bro. You look like a fucking... Bro, you're dressed like a medic in World War Men. Okay? That's all I'm saying, dude. You look like the fucking oldest fucking busboy

at the fucking Boston Red Sox, bro. Like, God, somebody get this guy a real job. Those are my bats. Hey, you look like the oldest manager at Spencer's. Hey, man, you're 40, you're still going to dress like that? You know, man. Yeah, bro. It's policy. Well, you create the policy, bro.

Yeah, dude. Back off these Bart Simpson shirts I got over here. Okay. Dude, I love Spencer's, man. I know you do Simpson shirts I got over here. Okay? Dude, I love Spencer's, man. I know you do. I don't see how they stay open, though. I never saw anybody buy anything, ever.

No one ever bought anything. You could get some lava lamps, and that's about it. You could get a Beavis and Butthead statue. Some Selena shirts. R.I.P. dog. A lot of posters. Yeah, you could get good posters in there our kids still in the posters I am I well I'm not a kid sorry just admitted

that you fucking have some issues with growing up you're still buying posters look dude damn Chappelle and bro I quickly said I am I still buy posters alright dude and you just had approved by the what posters did

did you have growing up Kat did you have posters growing up I used to have a poster of Britney Spears and a poster of

Paul Walker in Fast and Furious God bitches love Paul Walker Paul Walker is the love of my life well used to be right yes did you go to any memorials for him or anything like that like what was it like for you Bitches love Paul Walker. Paul Walker is the love of my life. Well, used to be, right?

Yes. Did you go to any memorials for him or anything like that? Like, what was it like for you? I did not go to any memorials, but I did loiter outside of a Tapioca Express when I found out that he died. And there's a bunch of like Asian dudes with like modded cars. So it was basically my version of that memorial. Died in a Porsche. Died in a Porsche GT Porsche GT

I think is the widow maker it is the car he was driving was a beast things a piece of shit And but I think his buddy was driving. I got a bitch They'd be like me letting you drive my car and then I die ain't that a bitch Well, I'll just tell you right now that that's how it would go down No, I know if you ever let me drive that bastard son be the end of your life look at that shit great car great car dude was yeah well no you can still you can still get him it killed him dude no his buddy killed him his buddy killed him huh his buddy killed the car didn't kill him the buddy did both of them did yeah and that that was well walker would have liked me definitely

i think more than you i don't Bob. I don't think so. I don't think so, because I know cars. And then you kind of have like a gay vibe. I feel like you always try to massage his feet. Gay vibe, dude? Are you shitting me, dude? Bro, you have a plus sign on your hat, dude. Okay, bro.

You have bananas on yours. Yeah, dude. You're 40 years old huh you have bananas yeah and this is a fucking signature hat dude it's a nice hat it is a nice hat i kind of like thank you very much dude oh you like the bananas that's a little plus sign hat hey me add me buddy dude the only if you take two straight men and put you between them, bro, that's gay right there. That's gay math, dog. Gay math, dog.

Yeah, if you're wearing an M plus sign, bro. Why did you go into an ice bath? Let's get back to this. Why did you get in an ice bath? To recover, man. To recover from a lot of strong fitness I've been doing. A lot of adult activity, intense training. What else?

Did you do an ice bath because you read comic books? Better line up the ice bath. Dude, I did a lot of high-pressure training, you freak. Are you still with that trainer who's just blown out your ass? No. The Nicki Minaj trainer? Did you fire her? I had to lay that lady off.

Yeah, she wanted me to wear a thong. Like, what is going on here? Why don't you take my pants off? She wanted me to wear a thong and get a My Little Pony tattoo. She's trying to turn you into Instagram thot. It's really a business decision. I said, I'm shutting this down. Tell you right now, bro.

What? I forgot my athletic green's not feeling great. Oh, damn. Really? I take it every greens. Not feeling great. Oh, damn. Really? I take it every day. I usually feel phenomenal, but not today. Man, you got to get it in your system. I know.

What happened? Just forgot. Oh, man. I'm going to text you tomorrow and remind you, man, because I've been taking them. Right out of the morning, I get up. I get a glass of water from the kitchen, water machine, water faucet. Sure. Next thing you know, I put in my pack.

I put in my pack of Athletic Greens. You feel great? Oh, I feel like the Incredible Hulk, bro. Dude, the one thing health experts, dietitians, athletes, top performers agree on is that the perfect diet doesn't exist, Theo. Even with a balanced, healthy diet, it can be tough to cover your nutritional bases. Oh, Christ. You can't do it through food alone.

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Me neither. He's having trouble waking up, dude. And you know, this is a common issue. 40% of men by the age of 40 struggle with their dicks not being able to jump up. Oh, I see. That's why you're always filming those snakes on your ride. You know, they're moving. You got to get it where you can get it, man.

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Remember, that's 4hims.com slash cats 5. Damn, I can't believe that Paul Walker would definitely choose me, though, I think, Brendan. I don't know, dude. Think about it, man. Think about it, though. He was into jiu-jitsu. But you're just saying stuff.

You're not thinking about it. He was into jiu-jitsu. But think about it. He was a purple on jiu-jitsu. But here's what thinking about it is, man. I took you to an ordeal. Here's the thing. I know you're friends with Dustin Poirier, so you think you know jiu-jitsu.

No, dude. But Paul Walker actually did jiu-jitsu, and he's into Porsches. Name one thing you have in common with Paul Walker actually did jujitsu and he's into Porsches. Name one thing you have in common with Paul Walker. Bro, he got put in a frickin' forever naked choke by a fuckin' Porsche, okay? I don't think he did that good of jujitsu, all right? Let's be realistic, dude. I'm just saying, bro. The Porsche never let him tap?

Bro, he got fuckin' Who made his seatbelt Bryce Mitchell? Because somebody fuckin' put that dude into a serious twister, bro. That's all I'm saying. All right? ever let him tap bro he got fucking who made his seatbelt bryce mitchell because somebody fucking put that dude into a serious twister bro that's all i'm saying all right i'm just saying if that dude can't make his way out of a seat belt and that's that bro that's all i'm saying dog r.i.p bro i'm just saying he would like me better than he would like you dude i don't think so all right what about paul wall oh me paul wall fan of course you are buddy now did he said now did his team send me a grill yeah they did i got a paul wall grill never seen you wear it dude really sad i can't

wear that because i'm not riffraff that's not friendship then where i'm from okay someone sends you a grill you should wear it dude you gotta rock it next you got to rock it next time. I'll wear it. Dude. Oh, suddenly you'll wear it. I thought you can't wear it. I'll wear it for you. Yeah, I'll wear my gold. I got a gold chain. It's not real.

It's not the same. Well. It's about as real as Theo, so I think you're good. No, we can connect, though. This is verified silver, you freak. You guys don't know anything about class. Thank you, bro. Let's rock that drip.

That shit is icy, bro. Ooh. Dude, I'll put a fucking footlong around my neck. Damn, bro. Somebody almost skated by. Somebody cut their finger with one of them skates. It was ice skating on my neck. I need to put something on this.

Oh, I know what I'll put on it. Some fucking ice, dog. Icy? If you need me, bro. So Paul Walker would be my friend. Paul Wall would be my friend. Paul Wall would be my friend. Paul from the Bible, dog. I'll keep Pauling, dog.

I'll Paul till we fall, bro. Let's go. Paul from the Bible. Here's a guy right here, dude. Here's my boy Carl Lentz. No, this is also the guy from Don't Fuck With Cats. Huh? That guy died, bro, didn't he?

No, he didn't die. He didn't? Did he commit suicide? No, he went to prison. He should have, Did he commit suicide? No, he went to prison. He should have, I think. I forget how it ends. Oh, my God. Oh, shit.

Bro, how do you... Sometimes you have ideas, and I'm like, wow, he has them. I mean, that is strikingly good. Damn. That's pretty damn good. Fuck. This froze on last week. Yeah. Damn. That's amazing. Wow. Is he dead, though, Nick? that's pretty damn good this Frozone last week yeah

damn that's amazing wow is he dead though Nick the people's pastor right there dog you think he looks like him

you win this round he doesn't look like Carl he wishes he looked like the Lord's fucking you think I'll find out you wish he looks like the Lord's fuck boy

dude I like that guy man oh come on bro I do I was just making a joke Carl I do Like the Lord's fucking. I'll find out. You wish he looks like the Lord's fuck boy. Dude. I like that guy, man. Oh, come on, bro. I do. I was just making a joke, Paul. I do. I like him. The Lord's bat boy, dog.

Please get me in heaven. Yeah. Bro, you should have written that down before you said it because I don't really want to be there. No, I do. So Paul Wall? Throw Paul out there, dog. Paul Wall I got.

Paul, what's your guy paul george would be my friend paul walker paul george would be my friend paul bunyan son what's up i don't know dog all right let's hear what this guy has to say then here's somebody right here you called this is you get you got this guy thanks buddy how do we do brendan how do we do Theo He sounds like him too Don't let me forget Hiya cat He's Japanese huh My name is James

I come from Scotland Scotland Yeah dude Freedom The white Japanese baby My king it or sting it Is quite simple

The Scottish accent King it or sting it is quite simple. The Scottish accent. King it or sting it. Gang gang. Buzz buzz. Or Glaswegians would say. Gang gang buzz buzz. Peace and love, brothers. Something's going on there that I don't know about oh I know what's going on that's easy

murder murder of cats this guy owns a couple extra knives if you know what I'm saying bro this dude's like oh you like this knife pocket on my pants I'm like I don't think you're supposed to put a knife in that pocket it's just a regular pocket yeah you can put a knife in any pocket. That's just a regular pocket. Yeah, you can put a knife in any pocket.

Thank you for the message from Scotland, dude. You know, Scotland, or as I like to call it, Brendan's Brea. Oh, because I canceled? Yeah. Canceled going back to the motherland, dude. Shout out to the white motherland, Scotland. I want to say, what is he asking about? Oh, just his accent in general?

Scottish accent. Scotland. Braveheart. Lightly. Yeah, that's right. Braveheart. William Wallace. Yeah.

Tell him Scotland is free. I love you. I always have. I love you. Always have. I love you. Come always have. Nah, dude. I love you. I always have. Nah, dude. I love you. Come on, do it.

That's Arnold Schwarzenegger. You right. Okay, bro. They don't have any Schwarzeneggers in Scotland, dude. Okay, first of all. That's a fact, dog. That's a fact. Yeah.

I've never seen a black guy in Scotland. A black guy? What do you mean? I'm talking like they don't have any. Austrians. Austrians, dude. I'm just saying I've never seen a black guy in Scotland. A black guy? What do you mean? I'm talking like they don't have any... Austrians. Austrians, dude. I'm just saying I've never seen a black guy in Scotland. Have you been there?

Yeah, they have a couple black Scots. I don't think so. Look up black Scottish man. I'm sure there's one, but you don't see a lot of them. You don't see a lot, dude, but you'd be a black Scotman, I feel like. Oh, I will for sure. Damn, that sucks. I'm sorry. Nah, don't give up on yourself so easy. Look, there you go. Will.i. Damn, that sucks. I'm sorry. Don't give up on yourself so easy.

Look, there you go. Will.i.am, bro. He's not Scottish. Yeah, dude, but he could be, dog. You know what I'm saying? He fucking acts like he is, bro. He shouldn't be faking it so much. There's a guy right there.

What about that shirtless guy up there? Brennan's little buddy right there. This little chocolate sugar sickle right here, bro. Fucking Scotland cock in your face, dude. Check out that trouser snake, dude. Check out the bagpipes on Brad. I'm not checking it out. It's crazy.

If Brennan biked up on this, he would just stop and film the guy's cock for about 13 seconds, I'm sure. Look at this thing. I think it's pregnant dude check out scotland down under dude these boys are doing it right man damn damn them boys got loose accents i like scottish accents i like scottish accents too because you can get out like especially if you come to like if you come to another country or go to another country you can get out of anything. Nobody knows what you're talking about. You don't know what you're talking about. It's a win-win, you know?

And they basically just took the Irish accent and they're like, we don't want to be Irish. We need to make it. We need our own thing. Yeah. And it's like, hey, I'm going to talk Irish. Why don't somebody punch me in the face while I'm talking? Like a gypsy almost. Yeah, yeah.

So you have a guy who's just like, oh, he's just like talking in Scottish, you know? And he's like, you know what? guy with Tourette's, apparently. I'm going to go King it, man. I King the shit out of it. I think chicks dig the accent too, right, Kat? Yeah. Do you? Wow.

I like accents in general, yeah. What's chicks dig in accent? Sean Connery. Is he Scottish? Yeah, he's Scottish. I'll tell you who else is Scottish, dude. The late, great Jerry Gerard Butler. That's right.

From 300. Yep. I'll also tell you another Scotsman. Jonathan Davis from Korn. He plays the bagpipes. He does? Yeah. Okay.

Is he Scottish? I don't know, he plays the bagpipes. That's pretty Scottish, dude. Scottish move. Yeah, that's pretty Scottish. I would say... Fat Master from Austin Powers. Is he Scottish?

That's a good one. That's a solid one. Is he really? How do you know it he says it what is some Scottish yep I'm Scottie oh oh get in my baby my belly baby get in my belly Gerard Butler I want to also tell you the famous late-night talk show host Craig Ferguson is a Scott. Oh. He might be the best one.

I like that guy. I'm going to go Jerry Butler, dude. Really? Yeah, 300. Have you seen since 300? Yeah. Who else is out there? Who's another famous Scott, dude? I think we covered them, dude.

Shout out Scotland. Yeah, they don't even have, usually they have like an arrow and you can scroll through. They don't even have that option they just have these six people that's amazing limited group there they should be proud of that oh yeah oh yeah i don't see a lot of bagpipes these days if you go to a corn concert you'll see a bagpipe yeah get out more yeah all right let me go to a corn concert quarantine you fuckantine, you fucks. Yeah, quarantine. Quarantine.

That's what they should call the next tour. They should. Quarantine. Great idea. I love corn. You like corn? Dude, who doesn't? I love it. Am I right?

All right, I'll do this. Let's put this up on the thing. King and her sing it for the audience. Corn, the band, or corn? K-O-R-N or C-O-R-N? Make sure that R is backwards, you know? Yeah. Corn the band or corn the meal or the Quran?

Put it up. Can you do three? We can do three on Twitter. Yeah. Do three on Twitter or the Quran. And then do just the two on Instagram. Okay. Okay, here's this guy.

I like a nice fresh corn, don't you? Give him my teeth. Oh, I like corn, man. I like corn. A sweet corn? teeth oh i like corn man i like corn a sweet corn do you remember did you ever have when you're growing up uh corn uh and milk nope i never had it nope are you talking about creamed cream corn oh i love cream as a side with a steak dude cream corn is just corn and milk not really yeah i think your mom told you it was captain crunch cream corn. It was a side with a steak. Dude, cream corn is just corn and milk, Brendan. Not really.

Yeah. I think your mom told you it was Captain Crunch. Damn. This is the worst Captain Crunch ever. Mom, this Captain Crunch tastes like shit. But it's still pretty good. Just tell your friends you eat Captain Crunch. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. That homemade Captain Crunch. That's that dinnertime Captain Crunch, man. What else you got, Nick? This is our last King or Sting it before we get to what I'm really excited about. This is Luke Schwartz. This guy works at the Comedy Store, doesn't he? Hey, King or Sting.

This is Ralph from Central California. Great name, Ralph. King it or Sting it. From CA. Memes and meme games. So I got some examples. I got cat, probably after receiving the 100th DP dick pic. Gang.

Got chin. I didn't even call them anything other than Korea. He takes his mask off. You did it right. Next up, Nick's grandma. You were right. Next up, Nick's grandma. You were right. I got Derek. Probably when he got into skateboarding.

Maybe in high school or college. Wait, back it up. We got Theo. This guy thought Derek Chappelle was Derek. What did he say? He says when he got into skateboarding. You saw Chappelle was Derek what did he say he says when he got into skateboarding oh he got him confused

so it's Chappelle hey King and the Sting I got Derek probably when he got into skateboarding maybe he was surfing in high school or college I don't know we got Theo

right about the time he cancelled all those shows in brea that is about how i got brandon waiting for chins on to text him back all ready to go and then of course me every time i see my body during this quarantine. Every time he sees his wildest body. Gang, gang, buzz, buzz. Y'all stay safe. Love the show. Keep it up. God, great submission, dude.

Wow, quality submission. What's that gentleman's name? Ralph, huh? And you don't hear that name much anymore. Also, it's a synonym for vomiting. Remember it used to be? That guy Ralph. Yeah, somebody Ralphed in my book sack that's right dude we used to have a guy and he ralphing people's um backpacks and stuff during recess that was his big thing he'd eat lunch and then go vomit right probably not getting a lot of chicks right all right not a lot of chicks were digging that i mean we were like five i think we were like

fourth grade or something five grades still and still yeah so yeah probably not getting any chicks but also nobody i mean you were getting chicks but you just had to stand around them and just hold their hands nervous yeah fuck all of that yeah you're right i'd rather vomit in people's bags yeah me too like a fucking legend dude yeah you're right i'm not trying to just stare at some girl. Man, sports have come to a screeching halt. With basketballs done, pitchers aren't on the mound. But our friends at MyBookie aren't going to let you stop, Brendan. They're not going to let us down.

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bucks yep use promo code cats to activate the offer if you like to gamble you don't have to stop you can still gamble uh that's promo code k-a-t-s you spin you win you get paid we got really early results but uh who would be better friends with paul walker brendan in the lead it's the porsche jujitsu connection surf whatever we got a lot in common let's all say surfing dude i used to surf all the time i don't mean i don't think i can a beach whaling yourself i think it's more it wasn't very good but i used to love it man yeah dude i've surfed twice as well okay brendan that doesn't mean that I'm a surfer. All right?

Just because if you think you're like Paul Walker, then die in a car accident. Well, it's a good chance. I'm just saying, dude. I love you. I don't want you to, but. But if it happens, you know. But I'm just saying, if you want to have the clout. I tell you what, if you're going to go, go in a Porsche GT.

I don't know. Who would be better friends with Paul Wall? Theo. By a landslide. Chain light up like a lamp when I'm back with the camp. I'm calling similar to it. Because I'm low through the earth. People's feelings get hurt when they figure out what I'm worth.

I got 84 poking out at the club. I'm showing now. I'm a player. Ain't no doubt. Hose one, no water on bow. Biggest diamonds all fit in my mouth. Princess cuffs all in my chain. Wood grain all in my race.

Jipper Sainsman. I forgot it. I had it for a second. I don't even know white rappers. Let's get a new picture of Paul Wall up, man. Hey, what was his main hit? Paul Wall? Ugly. No, that was Bubba Sparks. My bad. Bubba, what was his main hit? Paul Wall? Ugly.

No, that was Bubba Sparks. My bad. Bubba Sparks was ugly, huh? Ugly! Ugly! Paul Wall had grills. I know, but... Let me see your grill.

No, he had one. Something on 4-4, right? Ride Slow. Remember that? It had Kanye West on it. Remember Ride Slow? That was a Kanye song. Yeah.

Ride Slow, homie. That's a Kanye song. Ride Slow, homie. God, that Kanye song. Ride Slow, homie. God, that's a fucking... Paul Wall released a single, Break Em Off. God, that's a slapper. He used to do stuff with Millionaire. What did he have?

Paul Wall, baby. They don't know. On the People's Champ. People's Champ. Yeah, what was his main hit, though? If you could just play that for me next, I could fucking get my day going. Paul Wall songs, right there. Break Em Off. I'm throw champ. Yeah, what was his main hit, though? If you could just play that for me, Nick, so I could fucking get my day going. Paul Wall's song is right there. Break them off.

I'm throw. No, what? Sitting sideways. Sitting sideways. Sitting sideways. Go to sitting sideways, Nick. Look at Paul, man. Beautiful young fella out of Texas, wasn't he?

Where was he from? Houston. Beautiful young man. Sitting sideways. Boys in the days sitting sideways he's only four Paul Wall's 5'3 man

oh really hey sitting sideways how's this only a 1.5 million views look how small he is little Paul Paul little Paulie dog

he makes me want to drink scissor. Oh, yeah, bro. What did you say? Scissor. A little Sprite. A little codeine. That little Wayne drip. He's so cool.

He was ice cold, huh? Yeah, he was dope, man. All right, let's shut this down. This shit's pretty bad. You didn't like it? It's good, man. But it's just not what I'm trying to feel this morning. You want something else?

Mighty Mighty Boston? Yeah. Well, Paul wall's a vegan now go to new paul paul wall now oh you got all skinny and healthy he grew a beard yeah he's still sitting sideways but he's sitting a little i think he's just selling grills now oh damn mr steal your grill paul's a fucking legend bro he lost his weight too and he used to be more thick he probably stopped drinking all that scissor. That shit has so much sugar in it. Yeah. Dude, I remember going to...

In Atlanta, if you go to the Coca-Cola Museum, they have all the different Coca-Cola and beverages from different countries, right? So you can taste all the ones that they have in all the different countries. Some countries have different names and stuff, but they'll have Coke and Fanta, all the ones that Coke owns. so you can go to all the machines and try all of

them yeah dude you go to the africa one it is the sugariest one by far it's like drinking cough syrup really you're like thick bro it's crazy bro and you go to the japanese one and it is like very has very little sugar in it amer America's one is like in the middle But some of the countries Man, Brazil too had like the most sugary shit ever I'm like, damn Yeah, I mean now I think if I was a kid

Or if that's all I knew I would love it Sitting sideways Paul Wall was good, man Okay We got Rap Battle this week Oh, my favorite part Stay alert So last time we did it Paul Wall was good, man. Okay. We got Rap Battle this week. Oh, my favorite part.

Stay alert. So last time we did it, we had... What's that? And look, I will tell you this, dude. I urinated next to Paul Wall at a urinal once. Fuck yeah. And he was cool. And he shook my hand right after, hand to hand. And he knows your hand was touching that dick.

I mean, I was touching my own dick, but I was in the urinal, yeah. But then you shook his hand with that dick. And he shook my hand, too. What a man. What a man. You think he's wearing a fucking mask? What a mighty good man. He's talking with Theo's dick hand. You think he's scared of getting fucking COVID-19?

Dude. COVID could roll, bro. This shit is the most... What do you got, Nick? Who has it? Do any of you guys have it yet? Nope. Not yet. We didn't get tested. Y'all got tested? No, we didn't get tested. I want to get tested. I'm supposed to go to my buddy's house and get tested today. He has tests.

So, I don't know how much it costs though. Mine was $200. Was it really? What is this, Nick? I'm just going to hope I don't have it for $200. Keep your money and just play your odds. Even if you have it, you're good.

It's a smart move. Let's get this rap battle. It's tough. I'm with you there, bud. So Lil Browz ended up winning. We had a really close 50-50 vote that was only separated by 35 with Wiser Hip Hop and Big Gracias and Lil De Nada. Those are both great, but Lil' Brows just dominated again. We get so many submissions now.

I have two that, like, they're not as highly produced, but they're good and we should watch them and they're quicker. And then the actual contenders. The contenders are fucking sweet. Let's put them in. Here comes Young White, this guy. Me and him have the same bloated face, apparently. This is Tristan Lewis.

Maybe he's on the same medication I'm on. Bro, don't be one of those people that's have the same bloated face, apparently. This is Tristan Lewis. Maybe he's on the same medication I'm on. Bro, don't be one of those people that's blaming their freaking bloated face on thyroid medicine. Okay, bro. Get that shit out of here, dude. Thyroid medicine doesn't have frosting on it. This comes from a guy who cancels his brain shows. He said his brain hurt. It did, bro.

My brain was leaking out of my ear. That makes sense. I woke up one morning and a couple ideas I had were on my pillow. I'm like, this ain't a good look. This is bad, dog. I got to cancel the show. Dude, I got to shut it down, dude. You know how far it takes to get there in the traffic?

Yeah, I do. I've been there, dude. I did it with you. Three times, that's right. Yep. What do you got, Nick? What's up, team? It's Sting's ding i'm gonna drop the freestyle for you guys okay shit thanks for a deep sigh i hate on too much recording straight off snapchat

try out my phone obviously no headphones no nothing everything's gonna be straight off the top of the dome already okay what here we go. Years ago, they... Years ago, they tried to... Years ago. Years ago. Oh, yeah. Chappelle, weren't you saying that years ago? He has an Instagram ago he has an Instagram

yeah he's alive yeah he's alive is he thriving I didn't look at him no it's like random shit that he posts

I mean we're not throwing one in the jaw right there y'all get that huh yeah I'm just saying

dog warming that jaw up huh big dog this is him yep there he is Marshallall pope he had a real marshall pope right there 300 followers gang shit he's got a lot of followers 300 i said he actually returned uh this was all happened no pun intended years ago but he he returned to the

news and he actually did freestyle if we want to hear it yeah hell yeah he redeemed himself let's listen have you heard it hey can i get another and we're gonna let you take it away okay years ago they tried to throw me in the slammer look at you oh he almost up i'm a woman rapping to write self-publishing books invisible shackles got the whole world shit Who am I damn Derek Thomas car app a white boy? He is one son three balls wrote the struggles of love cuz love is hard Well, I wouldn't be able to do without the love from God

You're crazy looks like Derek Thomas. Rest in peace. Yeah, RIP. Whoa, dude. That's that Sammy Sosa. That's too many kisses, bro. That's a lot of love. That's too many kisses, man. The great Derek Thomas.

That's a lot of love, bro. Alabama's finest. Yeah. Years ago. Oh, shit. Years ago. Ooh, I don't know, bro. Years ago.

Bring up Marshall Falk gains weight. You think he looks like a thick Marshall Falky? Yeah, I don't know if there. Years ago. Bring up Marshall Falk gains weight. You think he looks like a thick Marshall Falky? Yeah, I don't know if there is even a picture here. Marshall Falk fat. Yeah, get that blue shirt. No, find him in that blue t-shirt. No, no, no, no, no, no. Shit.

Go back. Yeah, right there. No, no. Blue shirt. Thank you, sir. Years ago, bro. This better be good. Everybody you, sir. Years ago, bro. Years ago. This better be good.

Everybody get thick when they get older, huh? Ooh, he does look like him. He's close, bro. He's close. I think he looks more like Derek Thomas, though. I don't know, bro. That's close overall. I think it's really a mix, bro.

It's like Derek Thomas and Marshall Falk had a baby. He came out thick. a baby He came out thick Yeah He came out thick And uncertain Hey he almost had a mental Years ago Yeah

He was like No don't do it again We need Nick To redeem himself With that Iggy song Yeah Nick had the same moment One day Nick

Chappelle dropped Those fucking flow for us. It was Paul Wall. It wasn't my flow. But you remember it. Izzy's not his flow. Yeah. Oh, sure. White rappers are killing it over here.

Yeah, except this one. This came from Jared, who's actually a girl, and she wrote in her email, not white, I don't have a penis, and I've never rapped or made a beat, but I have got a white guy's name, so put me in, coach. Let's see it, huh? Get cheese. Get honey. Let's go.

Uh-oh. Culture corner, culture crack, though. Looks like Derek's never coming back. Oh, he's in a changeable color. Chocolate body, black face. Chappelle might not be a brother. He's in a school by his mother. Friend's job is super thick.

He's a soul like no other. Nick isn't missing the beat. Castellan's showing her feet. I guess she's okay. She seems super sweet. Although you don't like me, brita. I'm so cheap, brita. I'm kidding.

I could never see you. Oh, there, mama. I get that beat, huh? Getting cheese, getting honey. Getting that post-make ad money. I don't know if I'd do it over that rock beat, Type dual. Gang, gang. Buzz, buzz. It's me. Okay. All right, mama. That's it. There's no more lyrics. I don't know if I'd do it over that rock beat, that EDM beat, but that's fine. Yeah, she came in with a tricky beat.

It was a good effort. First female rapper. What do you think, Kat? Female to female. Female to female. Love her. Okay. She's not going to beat fucking Browse, though.

No, she ain't going to beat her. This is her first time, Brendan. Hey, man. You don't put a kid on a tricycle and think he's going to be damn Ryan Williams. Well, she's in the big leagues. This is King of the Sing. She's in the big leagues. Huh?

This is the big leagues, dog. Yeah, you're right. Trying to beat Browse. Better bring the heat. Yeah. It was a good effort. Appreciate the effort. It was a good effort.

Cute lady. She was great. She was great. They've just become total productions. She wasn't great. Let's don't lie to the lady also. All right, what do you want, man? I'm just saying.

We have to give her room to grow. We have to be supportive, you know? I'm supportive. That's why I said she's great. It was a great effort for her first time. That's what I think. Okay. Now, is she going to beat Little Browse?

Fuck no. Okay. All right, all right, all right. So, yeah, yeah. So, good luck next time. Shout out to the first black female rapper that's true dude she's a Jackie Robinson

the king of the city she's Bubba Sparks she's Rosa Sparks she's Rosa Sparks Rosa Sparks your BB your BB tour what do you got Nick

dude you know who turned into Throza Parks was fucking Cam Newton dude remember when he started dressing like a he started dressing like a woman

from the 1930s yeah he became a fucking tranny. And his play went down. His play went down. Dude, how crazy is it that nobody's giving him a deal right now? They will. Someone's going to pick up.

He's been so injured, though. Yeah, that's true. Hell of a player, though. MVP in 2015. MVP. Who couldn't have been, dude? 2015? How dare you?

What was going on? People hate on Cam Newton, but he's a fucking baller, man. You know what's crazy, too? He got kicked off the Florida team when they had Tebow. They had Ian Hernandez. They had all those ballers. He got kicked off the team for stealing a laptop. No way.

Damn. How could you not steal a laptop in college? That's what I want to know. Who wasn't stealing? This guy. What else you got, Nick? A real contender. We got two.

They're really good. Zombie Killers music. Mr. Rat King King, no, he gang, gang, gang. Buzzing like an animal, busting down some buffalo trees. Mr. Rat King King, no, he gang, gang, gang. No, he gang, gang, gang. Buzzing on perpetual, far from intellectuals. Burning always sexual, feel asexual. Playing with that money, not a nose, nope, nevermore.

Cat-toying with them bulls, yeah, like a matador. Pulsar bust so much, yeah, smell like albacore. Nippy looking angry, nope, never more. Cat toying with them bulls, yeah. Like a matador, poster but so much, yeah. Smell like albacore, nippy looking angry, yeah. Straight predator, 4CCs and they all on deck. That's the culture corner, got Forrest back. Chinny, chin, chin, you a psycho, dude. Not to show girls are your type though, dude. Touching me is something you would never do.

But I never say never do. King Man is asking for them bars. Burning out back in some foreign cars. If it's not money, passing really hard. Always red-handed in a honey jar. Deal, got the black hot talking gang shit. Pull up long hair, don't care, hit the bank shit. Not talking

all that same shit. Shining up in this bitch. Shots the bill of C, meeting God by a bank me. I ain't trying to poke the devil. What? What? I ain't trying to poke the devil. What? Trying to eat some poking level. What? I ain't trying to poke the devil.

What? Trying to eat some poking level. Kiss. Kiss. Kiss. Kiss. Kiss. Zombie killer music.

That was good, man. That was good. Wow. That was fun. That was fun. That was fun. Yeah. It's hard to hear a lot of what he's saying.

It is. Why is that? I don't know. Is it loud enough in there? Oh, no. I don't think. I think it was just the way he sent it in or something. Yeah.

It's just. They're not all the best producers. I mean, yeah, they're just not. The mixes aren't right. DJ Envy's not producing that thing. But, I mean, for doing it himself, that was a huge video. Yeah. It was good, man.

I like the bird eye angle. Yeah, that was real quality. He added in a lot of photos and stuff. Man, he did a really good job, man. It was fun. Yeah, it was fun. This one is also incredibly fun. This is from, this is called Tiger Sting by Buck Jeffery and Little Streaks.

Oh, Buck Jeffery, Little Streaks. Both Buck Jeffery and Little Streaks. Oh, Buck Jeffery. Little Streaks. That's yours. Both Buck Jeffery and Little Streaks are played by Evan Davis. That's your fucking underwear company. Little Streaks. Oh, wow. I'm going to financially recover from this. Buck Jeffery, dog. They had horchata.

I'm going to trust you. They had horchata, boy, if you never had this stuff. Oh, good. Buck Jeffery's close. Chumpton Beach or China boy if you never had this Oh Yeah, boy shop is Theo hit a big but club demonstrate We own it turn up in the pink. Yeah, you know all the pink go hard like D Rose I don't give a fuck to get all zeros money in the bank. So I can just see it. Y'all. Don't forget after touchdowns I don't quit ball go hard like LeBron in the paint touchdown bust down master bait I want that sweet tit sip.

Wow. Dang, bro, that horchata, dude. Wow. Damn, this shit was fun. I don't know what the fuck I just watched. That shit was fun. I don't know what that was. Is that a documentary?

I feel like we're going to get tested on it after. I don't know what happened. I don't know what that was. I hope he's okay We've gone too far Yeah I feel like yeah White rappers getting weird on us dude That shit went fucking deep bro

To beat fucking Little Brows I think we gotta open up to all ethnicities I don't know man These white boys getting real weird Little Brows speaking of Actually sent in an updated version. His third one. New music video. Fucking hit it, son.

Did he? Mm-hmm. Wow, spice it up. Premiering here and has never been seen before. Damn. I fucking love this dude. Dude, he's at Grey Block. God, Grey Block.

He's a gangster. Okay, last one and then I am done. He's at gray block. God, a gray block. Gangster. Okay. Last one. And then I am done. They got me beating on my chest. Fee five, four, fun.

They sleeping on me like the slept kingdom. I was waiting on a banger, but I didn't hear one except basic. Y'all sounding outdated. A bunch of guys on the couch. Same flow. New faces. Don't say my shit is whack.

Cause you sound crazy. I got the beat doing flips like Chappelle Lacey. I'm cold, but at the same time, I drop the heaters. Oh shit. to beat me they gonna have to try a little bit harder hitting them harder when i'm in the parking lot feeling like carter in between songs if i really want to roast them all i could but but i would rather turn this to a bop yeah yeah yeah i can't see the haters from the top no no it's getting kind of cringy y'all should stop yeah yeah i just felt the competition drop but i would rather turn this to a bop yeah yeah i can't see the haters from the top it It's getting kind of cringy. Y'all should stop. I just felt the competition. Eating like Brendan. Hair on Theo.

Horses in the back. Shout out to the Pisces bros. Derek's been away for way too many episodes. Find out if his girl is okay and then let us know. Y'all trying to sugar shot with Kat all wrong. Too many dogs coming off too strong. Chins they didn't really last that long. Just bought a bunch of alcohol and then went home I'm thinking of a street like the Les Mignon

Need a tiger king type of throne that I can sit on So where's my crown, let me keep that King or sting, little brows King now I'm the bread that turned this to a bop I can't see the haters from the top This nigga kinda cringy, y'all should stop I just took the competition drop Slow down I can't see the haters from the top. Oh, that's dope. Okay. It's nervous. Getting white.

Beating the old folks on some pizza. Derek. You're wondering where Derek's at. There you go. There you go. Damn, this shit is wild. Look at that guy with the pole, bro. Oh, bro.

Both trotters. Oh, this shit is legendary. Damn, he's a legend. I just got the competition. R.I.P. Curly, bro. God damn. Professional. At Hensel Music.

He got the neighborhood to be in this video. At T-Fern 3, gang gang. That's a pro, son. Wow. Buzz buzz pro game, son. Is that fucking God Sham God? Who is that? It's Delonte West.

That's cool. Is that the guy that went crazy? Yeah. They found on the street. Oh, man. Little brows, man. Just so hard in the paint. Damn.

A real pro. Wow. He said that's his last one, huh? I don't think anybody's ever going to beat him, so I don't know what we do. I think we open up to all ethnicities. Do we change the genre of music? I was going to say overall talent show or singing. Get some instruments.

What if we change the genre? I don't know what to do with this bitch. You can rap, sing, whatever you want. No one's going to beat Little Brows. It's not happening. What genre are you thinking? Never. American My Doll.

This shit's giving me cramps. Some of this fucking bullshit. I know a lot of people knew that too. He said, Chin's just an alcoholic. Chender went on one date and just got bombed

and that was it. And talked about her tits. He got hammered, drank a lot of sake and was like, her tits are nice. And then the camera shut off

and then said he was married after he said he's been in an arranged marriage since he was seven like what fuck that's news

to us bro you wasted our goddamn money and time yeah it cost $170 dude and our poor fucking friend

with the fat tits dude she was looking for love you son of a bitch. You honeydicked that poor girl, man. Bro, she has a name, dude. What was it? Oh, Hot Carl.

I called her Carl. Carly. Yeah, Carly. I called her Hot Carl. Carlito with the Tito's. Hot Carl. She was great. She was awesome, man.

I'm sure she's doing well. Yeah. Send her a video. Give us an update on your love life. Yeah, Nick, will you ever send her a video maybe? Yeah, yeah. We can see how she's doing. Just an update on how dating's been during the quarantine.

Has she been seeing anyone? Or if she's been, a lot of guys hit her up. Did she go on any dates from people that hit her up from this? Love to know more about her. What's that meme? If you sick, stay at home. If you thick, come on over. What else you got, Nick?

Do you want to pick a genre of music? Country? No, I think it can be anything. I think we open up the floodgates, man. Yeah, yeah, I'm open to whatever. Here's a lady right here that has an issue. Gang shit. Hi, guys.

My name is Kelly, and I'm a ninth grade English teacher in Las Vegas. In March, my school transitioned into online distance learning, which means I didn't get a chance to prank my arch nemesis, the ninth grade history teacher. Hoping you guys can help me out with that today while also uplifting my student spirits. Brendan, I need you to take it easy on the F-bombs. Here we go. Aristotle once said that poetry is finer and more philosophical than history,

for poetry expresses the universal, history only the particular. Here's the debate. English teachers versus history teachers. Choose wisely. Gang, gang, buzz, buzz.

Buzz, buzz. Doing the Lord's work educating the middle bastards. The F-bomb, she said, Brendan. Yeah, my bad. Sorry, I won't fuck this up. So here's the thing. What I would do, well, dude, Brendan. Yeah, my bad. Sorry, I won't fuck this up. What I would do.

Well, dude, first of all, English teachers all day. History teachers talking that bullshit, man. They're spreading them lies, dude. How about you educate us on some real facts? Like, how about George Washington? Wooden teeth? I say this. You mean teeth from the slaves?

Those teeth weren't wooden. Who's been cutting down no fucking apple tree? It's all a bunch of lies, man. You think he sewed a slave's tooth into his mouth, dude? That's more realistic than sewing wood

into his fucking mouth. No, it isn't. Think about it. I'm asking you to do something right now. Yeah. Think about it. Okay.

Yeah. I remember this joke from earlier in the episode. What I'm saying is, what I'm saying is, dude, you could easily put a piece of wood in your mouth. Look at a toothpick. It's not going to stay there, bro.

It's not going to stay there. If you shape it. You believe that shit, huh? The wood would get soggy. Huh? Imagine trying to put someone else's tooth into your mouth, bro. That's more realistic than wood.

Look at this. I don't know if I'm the only one who has the weird recollection of being taught that george washington had wooden teeth anyway uh noah's dentures were made of teeth from his slaves yeah from at oat milk 40 okay i'm not saying that i don't believe at oat milk 40 over fucking mrs fields bro're going to believe at Oat Milk 40. Over my history teacher spitting that bullshit? Over Merriam and Webster, dog, from a real history book?

Those books are fake, dog. Oh, my God, bro. George Washington and Slave Teeth. According to George Washington's ledger, on May 8th, 1740, he paid six pounds, two shillings to Negroes for nine teeth

on account of Dr. Lemoine. So he was a middleman, dude. So he was running teeth, dude. He was running enamel. He had a whole teeth fucking scheme, dog. Slanging teeth. Did you know this? That a lot of,

speaking of grills, slave owners would get, if they liked their slaves, they would get gold put into their mouths, into the slaves' mouths to show off their wealth. Oh, damn. Is that where France came from? Look at my dog, little Terry, right here.

And Terry would flex that gold, yeah. Like, damn, we shine and we grind. What's up? Look at Terry, dog. Seven gold teeth. Isn't that crazy? Damn. Damn, little Lance got one gold on him.

Little Lance, he's going to step his goddamn game up. Tyrone got all gold. Little Lance, you're going to step his goddamn game up. Tyrone got all gold fronts. Yeah, Tyrone. Why you got to get with Tyrone? Huh? But Lance was also black. I think he just did. Lance can be a black name.

Yeah. Lance is. Yeah, Lance now is. You didn't have a black Lance 20 years ago. Nope. What, 20 years ago? I don't think so. You think?

I think he had a homeboy Lance. Oh, Lance. There's a famous. The lyric was just kicking it with my homeboy Lance. Who said that? Biggie. Oh, wow. Hmm.

Going back to Cali. What did the fans say? 60% said history teachers. History is more fun for sure. What? You just said no. No, it was funner, but I like English teachers. I like history because they have pictures of cannons in the book. What? You just said no. No, it was funner, but I like English teachers. I like history because they have pictures of cannons in the book.

What? It's more fun, and you said I like English teachers. It was kind of ironic. No way. I like pictures of – I'll see you didn't pay attention during English. Yeah, dude. Yeah.

All right, we got one quick debate club to close it out, keeping with the school theme. Yeah. What's up, Ted? What's up, Brandon? Brandon, you look like an umpire at an adult softball league game. That's true. And Theo, I saw you in Amsterdam walking on the side of the street.

We crossed paths. I said, gang, gang. You said, what's up? So I just want to say thanks for that. I don't know if you remembered we spoke on Instagram, but anyways. Do you remember that? Do you remember that? He's asking you, dude.

What did he ask me? Do you remember talking to him on Instagram? I don't know. I thought he said he saw me on the side of the street. He said that too, but then he said he talked to you about it on Instagram. Oh, no. The man that I saw was working for Postmates. I think his name was William.

That might be him. No, this man was blonde-headed. Unless he shaved his head, it could have been. But yes, I do remember, brother. When you were in school, did you one-strap the backpack or did you two-strap it? Brendan, I know you have more experience in this because, Theo, you were homeschooled for your whole life. And you still have to wear backpacks. Gang gang short bus.

Gang gang short bus. Brother, good to see you again, dude. I do want to say that. And I do remember this beautiful guy, dude. Do you remember this little thick piece slinging Slim Fast on the side of the road in Amsterdam? You remember him slinging out those Slim Slows in Amsterdam? Those slippery Joes, bro.

What was his crush? Oh, one or two? In college, I went two. In high school, I went one. Be cool. Let me think about that. College, you went two in college? The books were fucking heavy, dude.

Books were heavy. Yeah, you couldn't go. Can't do one. Yeah, one in high school was a little bit more like, hey, I'm going to kill myself. Look at me, you know, kind of the depression, like, oh, man. Oh, not my stuff. You know, hair on your face one strap no nirvana one no one strap in high school man i'm down to do some things yeah dude yeah bro yeah

dude two meant you were a dork trying to get some stats you know two in high school yeah it was dorky two in high school was dorky Two in high school, yeah, was dorky. Two in high school was dorky. Two in college made sense, though. The books were so heavy. But then they always had, like, we had the biggest guy at our school, this guy, T.J. Mullen. He used to wear two straps.

And he was, like, a big, tough dude. So he could do whatever. I think it also depended on who you were. True. You know, but he also had no books in his book bag either which was also crazy all the time dude i remember opening his book i wanted to have like seven pencils did you ever wear overalls uh because if you left one of those off that's pretty gangster too yeah you leave one off like your crisscross if you stop in the middle of gangster that's gay bro you know one overall one overall yeah and then the girls would do it and have

tits oh that's sexy bro yeah that's sexy if i see a girl in overalls dude game on we getting underalls that's sex bro what would the fan say 80 said to strap it yeah yeah now i think it's definitely two straps you got that jansport or that North Face. You got to do two-straps, dog. It's all about business these days. Dude, did you ever have where your book bag, the strap came with that, and you had to fucking sew it back up? No.

And it was plastic, and that bitch would get all ratty, and then you had to tie it fucking together? What's the hot thing on the streets now with backpacks? Are Jansports still in? I think it's just no education, I think, now. You see, a lot of kids can't even learn or kids just take their tablets everywhere now yeah they used to make us buy the we remember the whole fucking ponzi scheme those math teachers with the ti-83 the texas instrument oh when those things came out they blew regular calculators out

of the water you could play video games on it yeah well it wouldn't even that was algebra first of all what you're talking about and uh you could download games on it? Yeah. Well, that was algebra, first of all, what you're talking about. They could download games on the TI-83. Really? Yep. That's why everyone was all crunk about them. Oh, I never did that, man. I remember with the old school calculators, you could write something and turn it backwards,

spell boobies. Oh, yeah. I think it was 8-0-0-8-1-3-5. I know. Spells boobies. Oh, yeah. I think it was eight, zero, zero, eight, one, three, five. I know. Spells boobies. Six, nine, two, two, two, five, one times eight spells boobless.

Yeah. Wow. Yeah. Yeah, it sounds like you guys are doing real well with the ladies. You pass it to your friend like...

Yeah, thanks, dude. Yeah. Guy's like... Nah. Well, dude. Yeah. Guy's like... Nah. Well, hopefully we helped some people. Yeah, hopefully we did. But I think we opened up the rap battle. I think we opened up American Idol on this bitch.

Whatever talent you got. What do you think, Cat? What do you think, Chappelle, on the battle? What do we do? Yeah, I totally respect your opinion there, Brendan. What do you think we do, guys? Talent. Whatever talent you got.

Because Browns has just been doing it, huh? Browns just blew everyone out of the water. And then the other submissions, they're sending documentaries and shit. Yeah, that one guy, definitely.

And one was a cry for help, even, I think. Yeah, me too. I think one was Tommy Hilfiger's son. I don't know what's going on in this episode. Yeah, dude. If you play one was Tommy Hilfiger's son. I don't know what's going on in this episode. Yeah, dude.

If you play one of them backwards, you'll start crying. You know, you can hear doves cry. What do you think, Kat? What do you think we do? I don't know, because how would you go and show, like, lowbrows against someone whose talent is like dance? How do you compare that? American Idol style.

We take a vote in here. We got six people. And Dangum style. God, it was good, man. Wait, keep little brows in it? Nah, he won. He won. It's not.

Yeah, we got to get him something, huh? Yeah. Trophy. Should we get him a belt? Belt or trophy? Yeah. Let's give him a belt. King of the Sting rap belt?

Yeah. Just don't order from the same guys you guys ordered the first Fighter in the Kid championship. How about that second one, though, hater? The second one was good. It came a year late, but it was good. Oh, my bad. Yeah. Well, dude, it takes a while to make fucking gold, bro.

That's true. Okay, I respect that. That thing's dope, though. Gold actually takes a long time to make. Thousands of years. The second one is very nice. The first one wasn't bad. People would steal parts of it and shit.

The second one is legit, though, huh? Yeah, man. I have two of them, man. Well, let's get them one. Some other guy. There's a young up-and-comer has one. I can't remember that guy. We'll get him like a rap battle belt, though.

Christopher? It's a little browse. It has his real name on there. Oh, yeah, yeah. Some diamonds on that shit. Get it fucking in on the outsides of the brows and his real name on there. Oh, yeah, yeah. Get some diamonds on that shit. Get him fucking in on the outsides of the belt, get two brows on it. Yeah, and put his picture up right on the wall right there. Yeah, we should get him up here, bro.

The Hall of Fame wall. Yep. Yeah, dude. We'll open up the competition to all. Or do we just go to a new genre of music? Is that what we do? New genre, new race. We're not going to get too many submissions if we just do country well we hold on i don't think it's just been a

white rapper it's been every rapper but it was that's just kind of the joke when we started that has been predominantly who sent him in but we we had that one guy who said the n-word was he white no he's mexican i think yeah of latino something else we had the black girl today that's fair we're inclusive okay yeah yeah i feel like We're inclusive. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. I feel like we're inclusive. I just feel like we just don't, we didn't get any submissions.

That's what I feel like. I feel like we didn't get a lot of, we didn't get any Asian submissions either. Chin, where's your fucking fan base at? I didn't do the selections. I didn't see that with the, you know what though?

Chin should make a song and then people have to beat that. I think you should have categories. So like all rappers, then any singers, and then people have to beat that. I think you should have categories. All rappers, then any singers and then also battle the bands. That'd be cool too. Then what about break dancers? That too. That's just watching somebody dance.

I don't think it has anything to do with what we're doing here. I'm not watching some men dance, dude. There's female break dancers. That's true, but they are strong, though, a lot. And they all have buzz cuts. Yeah.

Damn. They all have buzz cuts on their DNA as well that make them love women, usually. I just think we open it up. See what submissions we get what just to everything so just one like one winner for everything that makes it difficult well that's the only thing i'm

like do it because if we open it up i think we open it up but do we open it up like and say okay submit now or let's go to this category or do we open it up just because's, we're doing rapping, you know. So what would the category be? Singing? Yeah, singers. So just do singers for now. Yeah, that would be cool. I know there's a ton of people that love to sing, so. All right.

I mean, look how huge American Idol is in the voice. It's every network television show. Yeah, I would say there's a couple of, singing is usually something you do before you become a fucking hit man, if it doesn't work out. Dude's going to be having their girls submit. Yeah. That's what they're going to do.

They're going to have their girls sing. They're not even fans of the show. They're just going to force them to sing. So are we talking like acapella or are we talking like country? No, anything. Anything. Anything. Yeah.

Because if we just did rap, we could do country. Okay, singing. Just straight up singing. Okay. And put your genre. If we get enough or Okay, singing. Just straight up singing. Okay. And put your genre. If we get enough or specific, we'll mix it up week to week. If not, we'll put them all together. Do it in the shower.

Those shower hitters. And poetry slam if you want to do poetry as well. What's her name? What's her name? Miss? Miss Pat? No, the teacher. Her name was Kelly.

It was? Like Kelly said, poetry is more important than history. Did we ever vote on this? Because I liked history because of the cannons, and I liked history because of the war. We used to do a Civil War reenactment on the playground every year. Oh, that's cool. It was pretty cool.

During Black History Month, was it the entire month dedicated to black history? We just studied Malcolm X. Well, sometimes you got to, we had, what did we do? We had a cannon. We had archery. Somebody got to be Native American. They would always try to package it up with some other shit. It was usually around Thanksgiving.

But it was pretty fun. Did they make you study Geronimo and shit? We got to eat stuff that they had in the Civil War. Civil War food. That's nice. It was pretty cool. Like beef jerky and shit? Yeah, or more like biscuits.

A lot of biscuits and somebody would play the horn. It was pretty fun, dude. It was a good time to, like, kind of, if you were flirting with chicks or whatever, it was a good time to try and flirt. Because you were out of class. You were in class, but you were out on the playground. Yeah, that's the best. And somebody flew a kite into the power lines and fucking electrocuted themselves one year, and we fucking had to shut it down. People were pissed, dude.

It was the first time the North and the South were on the same side just against this one fucking kid, William. Bad news for Will, man. Oh, he was a piece of shit, dude. He was always... What grade is this? Fifth grade. Fifth? Yeah.

God, it was fun, dude. Dude, John! You guys had your outfits and shit? George! That was pretty good. You had the muskets? It was good, huh? Yeah, yeah. We had muskets. George. That was pretty good. You had the muskets? It was good, huh?

Yeah, yeah. We had a man that would come in that had real weaponry, and he got to hold that, and we got to hold the fake ones. Damn, you guys went all out. But it was fun, yeah. Pretty fun. Oh, look at this. Which is better, corn, the band, or corn, the fucking vegetable?

Oh. 62% the real corn. R.I.P. Brian Welch, dude. Can you play us out with some corn, Nick? Freak on a leash? Or you could just put wind blowing through a cornfield.

I'd be fine with that. What's your favorite corn song, Chappelle? Chi. It's off their early album. Life is peachy. Would we know it? Oh, and Ball Tongue's

really good. Blue Mary. It's off their early album. Life is Peachy. Would we know it? Oh, and Ball Tongue's really good. Oh, yeah. I remember my brother started listening to this when we started Stop Being Friends. They were good, huh? Okay. Wynonna had a big brown beaver, and she showed it to all her friends. Remember that song?

Chen does. It's a little more underground, huh? It's their second album. Give me more of one of their hits, Nick. Yeah, give me one of their hits. Give me like Got the Life or something. Yeah, play something. Yeah, get that hit out.

Oh, with the cartoon. People love them, huh something. Yeah, get that hit out. Oh, the cartoon. People love them. My brother-in-law loves this band. Something like a fake on a leaf. Yeah, this is... You ever seen him in concert? I don't know how white people dance to this. I have.

I worked security for them. Oh, you did? Did you really? For them and then Hilary Duff. Oh, I could see that, dude. For her Duff Enough tour? Yeah. That was a good tour. Can't get enough of that Duff, baby.

Hey, what's the video where they have with the bullet? This is it. With the bullet? No, the bullet's going through the glass. It starts in cartoon and it turns real. What a great video, man. This is the kind of music angry white dudes make chilly to this music, man.

Make a nice French dip to the corn. Yeah, dude. They're from Talley, right? Yeah, Bakersfield. Yeah. Are they really? Have you done that club in bakersfield

yeah there's a bullet brendan that's my favorite it's like oh bus lamp whoa literally the lamps busting bro i don't still see how we haven't made the bus lamp do your show right man boom boom boom boom pg baby praise god see where's the skirt? What a great fucking... Look at them just rocking out, dude. What's the lead singer's name? Tougher than even in music, man.

That was 97, yeah. Jonathan Davis? Jonathan Davis? God, he's a badass. Were you ever a Limp Bizkit fan? I like Limp Bizkit. Give me some Limp Bizkit. Break stuff.

That was a good one. You know what I was listening to on my bike ride this morning? I do a playlist of one band, so I listen to the whole band on the ride, all their top hits. What is it? I listen to R whole band on the ride, all their top hits. What is it? I listen to Rage Against the Machine. Yeah, man. That should have made you want to start a revolution. Dude, what about Ray Charles Against the Machine?

Have you seen that? I don't think he's seen it either. Oh, no way. I'm thinking of John Henry, the steel-driving man. Have you ever remembered that? I love that guy. Is it Heart Exploded? But you want to justify.

He's sober now. There's no one at all. Ray Charles? John Henry? I did a golf thing with Limp Bizkit. Fred Durst. Yeah, he's sober. A lot of those guys are now. They went wild.

Yeah, a lot of them were sober. The red Yankees have? They're all into Jesus now, too. Yeah, it's a bummer. It's a bummer if you want to go to hell. It's a bummer, but if you don't, it's not. So it's just a choices thing So come and get it

Remember him and Method Man? Oh yeah, they had a song together Remember that after that Everybody that had a red hat on It was just Fred Durst It became a Halloween costume For dudes that didn't want to. They put a white shirt on and a red Yankees hat.

You know he's directed movies? Really? Anything we know of? Yeah. He did one with Ice Cube in it. Yeah, what did he do? We look on his IMDB, do you mind? Yeah, he's directed some movies.

Because I know Rob Zombie does the scary movies. Yeah. Yeah, I tried to get him to do my comedy special. Fred Durst? Rob Zombie. Or Bobby. They call. Yeah. I tried to get him to do my comedy special. Fred Durst? Rob Zombie. Or Bobby. They call him Bobby. They call him Bobby now?

Yeah. I'm like, dude, you can't be Bobby Zombie, dude. That's... Robert Zombie? Huh? Yeah. Robert Zombie? Just so I have the same flow.

I'm going to call you Rob Zombie, and you're going to direct this goddamn comedy special because you've got nothing else to do. Oh, dude, what are you talking about? He does great shit. Holy shit. He couldn't do it. The education of charlie look at this shit that looks horrible that kid is horrible though i feel oh dude don't know he's great no he's great you think i like him you didn't see him in uh in the the facebook one the social network social network is great

this is great yeah that's the one i saw that I didn't realize he directed. Long Shots? He's fine. Limp Bizkit. Look at him. He directed this. The Limp Bizkit thing. Ooh, he directed Puddle of Mud.

The Blurry. Behind Blue Eyes. Did he really? Yeah. Who is he? Fred Durst. Oh, Fred Durst. I thought this was Rob Zombie.

I'm talking about Rob Zombie. Oh, Rob Zombie hit you with some real horror movies, though. His shit's too gory for me, though. I like scary. I don't like gory. Yeah. I like scary, too. Dude, we should watch a scary movie sometime.

Not just us. You freak. Yeah, I guess. I want to come over and watch a scary movie with you, dude. You and your plant. I have three plants. And one of them is black. Yeah, I guess I want to come over and watch a scary movie with you, dude. You and your plant. I have three plants, and one of them is black. So I do want to say that.

It's because I didn't water it, but it's still diversity, bro. He directed Tom Papa's? Yeah. Tom Papa's hilarious, man. Yeah, he is. Making a nice fucking sourdough loaf, too. Does he make good bread? Yeah, that's what he does. He has a show making bread.

He does? Grateful Bread. Damn. I made up the Grateful Bread thing. I don't know if you... Grateful Bread is a company, though, actually. I think that does make bread. It's also merch I sell.

Oh, you're coming out with a new bread company now? Yeah. What's up, doggy? I'm just saying, bro. Getting Baked. Getting Baked? Oh, Getting Baked out with a new bread company now? Yeah. What's up, doggy? I'm just saying, bro. Getting baked. Getting baked? Oh, getting baked with Tom Poppins. You really trying to get Rob Zombie to direct your special?

I tried to. Oh, he's not into it? He couldn't do it. Too busy. Yeah, he couldn't do it. Or actually, he might have charged too much. I couldn't remember what it was. No, it doesn't sound like you wanted to do it.

Damn. Shit. That's probably true. What was his famous one? Oh, Devil's Rejects. That's right. Oh, yeah. Dude, yeah, there's nothing to do.

It's like you go to the gas station and you just, you know, you stop at a place and just walk around. People are in the supermarket. There's nothing to do. You better have a mask on because all these bitches judge you if not and i just sit there and spew off facts dude in the masks i don't know if they do anything no all they do is show you you have shit breath oh yeah my brother's bad hot too hot hot i pull mine down so just my fucking my fucking big old nose hanging out the top sucking up all that air but you're supposed to cover your nose and mouth i know know, I don't. I'm a rebel, dude.

I'm a rebel, Donnie. Name the movie. I'm a rebel, Donnie. I'm a rebel, Donnie. Hot. I know what it is. You got in trouble for jacking off. Donnie Brosco? No.

Pee Wee Herman's Big Adventure. Oh, yeah, yeah. I went on a date with a lady from there. I'm trying to get... Who'd you go on a date with? Big Marge? No. I'm trying to get Peewee Herman to direct my next special

Yes rates pretty low And that outfit he'll definitely direct it okay, he'll direct it right onto your back You try gonna date with large Marge You tried going on a date with Large Marge? Oh, dude. With Pee-wee's girlfriend in that. Oh, really? The one who made the fucking egg salad sandwich that was dripping on her face?

You've never seen Pee-wee's Big Adventure? Here you go, right there. Elizabeth Daly? Who was his girlfriend? What was her name? Dottie. That's not her. Dottie.

I'm a rebel, Dottie. Yeah. I'm a loner, Dottie. No, he's the original Thick Boy's Bike Club because his bike got stolen. That's what caused the whole movie. Shit is good, bro. If you can get it in your mouth, dude. That's a Jocko hitter, dog. This shit, you can barely contain it, dude. You know why it takes so long to get those?

That's actual Jocko sweat. You feel like a fucking American when you drink that shit. He makes one batch. One batch just for Theo. I hear an eagle in it. I feel like that's not safe. It saves a hit. All right, man.

Let's get the fuck out of here. Get home, dude. All right, man. All right, man. All right. Brendan and Theo, fighter in weight. I got to go in and go hard in the paint. I do not think. I am in flow. Black rifle coffee, I'm ready to go. I need a sponsor.

I am a monster. About to open up with this at my concert. Flow is contagious. Brows are outrageous. Thicker than girls' letter. Instagram famous. Damn. Hungry like I'm fresh off keto.

Seeing red like Andrew Santino. Every song I hit like the great Bambino. Brendan ate the queso and the quesoritos. But everything's gonna be fine. Hate on me, I do not mind. Theo looking like the type of dude that got a pack of matches in his pockets at all times. They sliding into my DMs. A couple of you tried but couldn't beat them.

Quit playing like Nintendo DS. You don't want to smoke like Joey Diaz. Meaning y'all edible. Just got my eyebrows threaded and I'm feeling incredible. Brennan's son hit me up. He said it's too loud in the club. Can you pick me up? King and the sting.

King and the sting. King and the sting. Bee sting. Rat king. King and the sting. King and the sting. Got the bees in the trap. Got the cheese on a string. King and the sting. King and the sting, got the bees in a trap, got the cheese on a string

King and the sting, king and the sting, king and the sting, bee sting, rat king King and the sting, king and the sting, got the bees in a trap, got the cheese on a string Brendan and Theo, fighter in Creole, Shout out New Orleans and shout out to CO Colorado, more specifically Boulder Brendan came in with a chip on his shoulder But it's still gold and yet it's still fire If you don't like king and then sting, you're a liar Brendan's got like a thousand different hustles

One of them's at Nordstrom, racked doing tires Black rifle coffee, we hear you loud and clear Your son on the email, like please get me out of here It's way too loud in here, watching the Irishman Eating pizza, drinking half a beer Now on to now on to theo von looking like the type of dude that tries to read us songs smoking cigarettes with a snapback on about to hit the crib and turn snapchat on it's all good we still mess with you 1811 pico boulevard go get that hitter derrick and cat y'all doing great thursday upload not a minute late y'all wanted to rap i had to

demonstrate brand new studio y'all feeling great putting chris delano in his place now let's go and get you in a game king and the sting king and the sting king and the sting king and the sting oh yeah king and the sting, got the bees in a trap, got the cheese on a string. King and the sting, king and the sting, king and the sting, bee sting, rat king. King and the sting, king and the sting, got the bees in a trap, got the cheese on a string