The Golden Hour - Episode 71: Pond Stars

Episode Date: May 29, 2020

The guys talk Theo's Garage Hair Salon, Brendan's Mexican Barbershop, Joe's vs Bro's, Cat's Creepy DM's, 92 Year Old Rapper Fan, All New Singing Contestants, Hannah Barron vs Hot Karl as potential dates for Theo, Asian Skeet Shooters, 4th Of July Dick Pics and much more!Hims - https://forhims.com/kats5Athletic Greens - https://athleticgreens.com/katsSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

They don't touch the top of my hair. They only do fades. So, tons of black people in there. Bring that back up, please, Nick. If you notice, in the wall, when he's sending me this picture, I say, Bro, you have to be in Mexico. That green color paint is only in Mexico. It's actually called Tijuana Green. Back off my broccolini get your life together

don't touch me bro i'm not touching you dude how's some titty implants doing your ass how do y'all know about that how them double d's doing out the back are the back? You went real cheap on your ass. Why are we talking about that? Nah, I don't want that Brazilian butt lift. I want them tits. Yeah, let me get the...

Let me get them triple Gs on my fucking backside, girl. Let me get that Brazilian. Let's go Tallahassee. Give me that Tallahassee tailgate, brother. There you go. Give me that Tallahassee tailgate, brother. There you go. Give me that Tallahassee lift out the back, Doug. Dude, man, my butt's getting tight this time of year, man. Yeah, bro.

Dude, I just went fishing up in Oregon all weekend. What made you go up to Oregon and do it? Just cruised up there, man. I'd never been up there. Didn't get a bite. Didn't get a fish, man. Oh, nothing? You just stared at the water, basically, and threw a fucking line in there? Oh threw a fucking line in there embarrassing man lost like 30 worth of lures in there or lures i don't know i don't

know what they say yeah lures what kind of fish were you i guess looking at i did see one fish swim by one time um did anybody catch fish no some guy came over to help us we got so many like lures snagged in the um and on the rocks and stuff so basically you're just ankle deep in water standing in the water it's embarrassing man it was embarrassing it was beautiful but it was just embarrassing did you at least go to captain d's after and show him who's boss uh there i am right there oh look at him go caught nothing out there how many hours were you out there? I was out there probably three hours. Them Duck Dynasty vibes, huh?

Yeah, go forward a couple, Nick, on the other side. Looking like Fuck Dynasty. Subtle Lake. We were using worm and dry cat food out there. We didn't catch nothing. Damn. Worm and dry cat food. Damn, you had to follow protocol, wear that mask.

Yeah, on the plane, they said, wear the mask, the mask the lady said we don't have to everybody had it on and at one point the lady looked over at me and went like that damn because you didn't have it on i don't have it on so i put it on i didn't have it on because i was trying to have a snack they're hard to breathe in yeah put a snack hole on it you do something yeah let me snack through this bitch yeah let me drink through it at least put a little skittle outlet or something like a sneak uh candy yeah put a snack hole on it. Yeah, do something. Let me snack through this bitch. Let me drink through it. At least put a little Skittle outlet or something like a sneak candy through. Yeah, put a little hole in there. You feel me?

Oh, yeah, I feel you. I'm saying it. Yeah, you're right. I'm saying it too, boy. Damn, no fish, dog. What a waste of time. One guy had three fish, and they were beautiful, man. Was he kind of shoving your face a little bit?

Like, Danny's fish are biting over here, man. It's getting annoying. We can only eat so much, you feel me? Like, damn, I might have to open up an aquarium. This is getting crazy. It's like SeaWorld over in this bitch. How you guys doing over there? Nothing, man.

The clearest water you've ever seen. did anybody have experience fishing though fishing's a technique too man yeah were you splashing around and shit and joking around no doesn't the fish dip out you know silent assassin i was real quiet and you had the big the big water boots on no no i wasn't standing in there i was just sitting on the outside sitting on a bucket uh i had a couple snacks didn't even have any snacks i was trying to be so quiet that ass fit on a bucket when you get a snack yeah dude if you want if you can't get a snack sometimes yeah sometimes i'm snacky scare the fish away too oh yeah sometimes i'll be snacking i miss entire shows oh all dialogues really i gotta put the closed caption. If I'm snacking

and I'm watching like Narcos, I'll miss the whole plot line. Snacking. Snacking. I can't eat with somebody like that. I can't watch TV with somebody like that. I can't be in the room

if someone's eating. Really? If someone's chewing, it's called mesophilia. Are you serious? Mesophonia. Oh, shit. Oh, damn, Nick.

The black tape didn't work. You gotta tell me when you break it. I find it on the ground 15 minutes before the show. Nick can barely do his job, dude. Nick is the Keith Peterson of... You mean I do my job well, but I'm drunk? Oh, yeah. Sorry.

I mean, he does his job well, but he's drunk and doing cigarettes. Yeah. This Larry King vibe. This is Pabrochio. Every time you name a fake disease, the furniture breaks. That's what this is, bro. I got mesophilia, dog. The name changed.

Say it again and the wheels are going to come off. Nick put some duct tape on his leg. Nah, you good, fam. We're on a tight budget. Corona hit King and Sting hard. Nick put some electrical tape on this shit. Those chairs are mid-century modern. I didn't want to get rid of them.

This thing's a legend. Dude, that thing has the Mickey Mantle gene, I thought. Dang it. That Mickey Mantle gene, I thought. Dang it. That Mickey Mantle gene. Wow. Damn. That dismantle gene. That thing is broken, bro.

I want my money back. Damn, dude. Yeah. This Ikea is full of shit, man. Wow, bro. Damn, bro. Damn. I don't know where you grew up, but this shit ain't going to hold.

I can't believe he taped it on there. And then act like it was all good. Nah, you got this, dude. I'm 240 pounds, bro. 250. Dude, that's what I'm saying. 250. Not 250.

Drop 10, bro bro meet me at 240 dude you know who should have took with you fishing who chin really yeah man i was jealous when i saw those pictures there's two there's two things you want to do with chin what what there's two things you want to do with them he's thinking he's trying to remember i'm trying to think of the other one but it's if you if you want to go eat cream barbecue you take chin yep if you want to go fishing you take chin oh wow if you want to hide a dead body you call chin oh damn huh those three things yeah really what do you fish for chin actually when i was looking at your thing i fish for trout mostly so it looks like that's trout area yeah it was Is it fresh? Is it fresh water? Yeah, it was fresh water.

Fresh as you can imagine. So fresh, man. Did you drink any of it? Oh, yeah. You could pick some up and just have it. Oh, I love that. Free water, man. That shit would jump right in here.

If you even open your mouth up close, about six inches from the top of the lake, someone would jump in your mouth. Just that Oregon fucking river mouth, dude. Coming right out the mountains, dude. Beautiful. Damn. That shit ain't beautiful. Damn, out the mountains, dude. Beautiful. Damn. This shit ain't beautiful. Damn, you got that middle seat over there.

I feel like I'm on Spared Airlines. This shit's falling apart, dog. Where the fuck's my penis, Nick? Your what? Penis. Oh, I thought you said penis. Oh, no. We got? Penis. Oh, you said penis. Oh, no. We got chairs in here.

You got another one? No, hell no. This is the original. I'm rocking this thing until the wheels fall off. It's probably another two episodes. How are we going to fix that?

I don't know. Who gives a fuck? Definitely don't use electrical tape. Jen, what tips would you have gave Theo out there where the fish ain't biting For trout There's something called Berkeley

Powerbait which is great Chartreuse green is probably my favorite color But wait so you use cat food too right So is that for catfish No for just any kind of fish I was interested in Sounds like they don't know what they're doing Who told you to get kibbles and bits And catch fish dude or just any kind of fish I was interested in. All right. Sounds like they don't know what they're doing, huh, Jim?

Who told you to get kibbles and bits and catch fish, dude? The fish are like, look at this fucking moron, dude. Put wet cat food in the river. He expects us to jump on these fucking forks. This is dry cat food. Cat fish. This is dry. You can't fish with wet cat food, man. This is dry cat food. And, we just struggled man it was just a real struggle you didn't get a catfish in the dms nothing nothing

no fish nothing it was tough man god it was beautiful though huh oh so beautiful man they saw oh deer everywhere deer come right up in the backyard you have a little something have a banana or something you shoot them bitches no why would you we would draw pictures of them dying and stuff but we didn't just do any we didn't shoot them it was like a neighborhood kind of area was it quiet up there and nice so quiet when things open did you go to a restaurant yep went to a mexican restaurant oh si senor yeah dude damn mexican oregon not where i'd want to be but i'll take it at this point you know dude it was uh it was definitely some of the worst mexican food i've ever had but it was mexicans in oregon that's true actually you can come by the fucking shop cost of the night it's taco tuesday motherfuckers is it really my girl's

making it right now come on over dog taco tuesday motherfuckers is it really my girl's making it right now come on over dog taco tuesday all right i'll be there i got no food come on now i'm gonna be there uh yeah what else was fun it was just good man it was fun it was real relaxing nice to be out there huh yeah do you sleep in tents or you go to a hotel slept inside slept inside we rented a uh like a house up there damn you fancy so yeah it was just my friend's family so we just stayed up there should have called cam haynes he lives up there he lives up there he would have ran through that river and fucking picked up all the fish for damn yeah he probably i just know him through instagram

no he's great yeah yeah i Yeah, I probably should have. I wish I would have done more stuff up there. What did I do, man? So you went to that shitty Mexican restaurant. Yeah, I went to a Mexican restaurant. What did you have at the Mexican restaurant? Enchiladas? No, no, no, no, no, no.

Dorito, right? Standard shit. No, no, no, no. What did I have? Steak and spinach enchiladas. Enchiladas, yeah. Enchiladas, yeah. Standardadas yeah standard so they were good man but what else happened up there not too much man just chilling huh yeah a lot of whites a lot of people chilling you know we're getting a lot of white oh yeah even uh yeah they even had a couple black dudes in white face up there oh yeah very rare smart

when you think about it yeah definitely i mean it checks out some boys in 2040 yeah uh it's a future pal can't figure out where to get a haircut really i both got haircuts he got one yeah you got that and i got my cut in a garage over in recita last week he said he sends me a picture of him getting his haircut in the garage i was like dog i'm at a fucking barber son oh bro he was at a keen senior. I do where you got your hair cut He goes where'd you get your haircut at Mexico might as well been damn dude you have to see this picture Look at that. That's awesome. Oh, yeah, this lady and her husband set up a salon They set up a salon in the garage out there and received off the 101 over there

up near Winnetka. Damn. She did a good job. I had to finish it up. I mean, you look exactly the same. You think? What do they do when they cut your hair? I've never been like, damn, did you get your hair cut? Oh, I had to tighten it up on this side.

This side was good. This side was secondary. But it's all tight now. Oh, she had to tighten it up on this side. This side was good. This side, secondary. But it's all tight now. Oh, she was nice. I had to sneak my shit in. They did not want pictures. Really? Dude, I'll tell you this.

Second of all. Damn, my eyes are lazy. It's all right, dude. My eyes are super lazy. Why don't somebody tell, brother? Damn, my eyebrows on point. I woke up like that now. They cut black people?

Oh, yeah. They don't touch the top of my hair. They only do fades. So tons of black people in there. Bring that back up, please, Nick. If you notice in the wall, when he's sending me this picture, I say, bro, you have to be in Mexico. That green color paint is only in mexico it's actually called tijuana green

i'm not joking bro you somebody in your family has to be hella mexican to even have a can oh dude that place is there's only there's mexican soccer on the tvs it's only mexican there's no english being spoke i gotta show them a picture of what I want. Because they don't understand at all. Nothing. Cash only. You come in the back door. I ain't going to tell you where it's at. I'll tell you off air.

I'm not trying to get them boys shut down. It's all they got. Really? It's all they got. Oh, damn. Yeah, they were struggling in there. 19 barbers. I was the only dude in there.

Really? They're just fighting they're just cutting each other's hair too hell yeah and cutting each other yeah it'll get weird that was cool it's kind of like the ultimate fighter of barbers oh yeah it'll get no audience it'll get hella weird in there man um you have to sneak that bitch in for teo teo's damn what are you here? Got Mexico? I'm like, maybe.

Or LA? You never know. You look like you just fucking went a couple rounds with Brutus the Barber Beefcake right there, man. Damn, gave me that Philly fade. Yeah, man. You got that fade looking good, bro. Thanks, doggy. I'm jealous you went to Oregon, man.

I'm going to Houston Thursday. Oh, yeah. Try it on. Back on the road, dog. Thanks, doggy. I'm jealous you went to Oregon, man. I'm going to Houston Thursday. Oh, yeah. Try it on. Back on the road, dog. A little nervous about it. Yeah. Houston popping. Where are you going?

Houston Improv? Yeah. Wow. I love that place. Me too. I dig it. It's fun. I love Texas.

Oh, Texas is good, man. Dude, our new merch is sold right out of Houston. H-Town. Dude, we should bring some merch probably over to the show. That's not a bad idea. But it's available now. We'll let everybody know

it's available now. Yeah, by this. Through the King and the Sting website. And you got the website up, Nick? Bring it up for them folks. Would you. I don't know if we have an active website,

but we should. What was he going to tell you? He said, I don't know if we got a website website but we should huh um what's he gonna tell you he said i don't know we got a website no we do they just redid it the fuck was i gonna tell you though is it king distinct oh would you move to texas would i move to texas yeah i would i love texas man i've thought about moving a lot recently man especially since i've been places like and just like enjoying my life more just like went to utah went to oregon just the quality of life is just a little bit more relaxing and if i make two dollars in texas i keep two dollars yeah if i make two dollars in la i keep one dollar yeah it is kind of crazy man it's okay i mean the taxes are just crazy's crazy, but also the government here is crazy. Look, I agree, man.

It's squirrely, bro. You know, it's like... I've been thinking a lot about moving to Austin. It's weird to go other places and then come back and you're like, oh, this place is like you can't do everything you want to do right now. You know? Yeah, you throw in the traffic. Oh, yeah.

It's definitely a hectic place to live man yeah utah was nice i mean oregon was nice but then i just wonder how much we couldn't we how much work could we do you know i guess you could still travel and do work yeah you still travel you you'd still do king of sting pretty easily yeah how's that gonna i'd love to hear about that you have to see the globe burn to NASA. Well, no, you're down to move. Oh, I'm down to move too. Yeah, definitely. That's true.

If you and I move to the same place, you know what I'm saying? That's a good point. It's really not a bad idea. But then on this past weekend, I would only be able to have you as a guest all the time. I could get other guests from Texas. Yeah, you could fly. But yeah, there's a ton of guests in Texas. You you could fly guests in i love that something to think about and people would come there to perform you gotta be a guest then hey come be a guest buddy yep you're here

i'm not in town like oh yeah you are i looked at the fucking cap city menu you're in town corner them dude them corner dogs something to think about doggy it is something i'm a little nervous i'm on tour i'm doing those thick boy bike club meetings we got 200 riders in spokane really damn yeah i don't know if the trail's ready for that it's a lot of weight yeah i thought maybe we'd have 20 or 30 people that's 40 000 pounds of weight, isn't it? 200 times 200, yeah. That's a lot of people.

Dang. I know I'm trying to navigate through it. Them trails are going to be thick, dude. Ain't nobody going fast. There's going to be a straight... What is that? Ain't nobody going fast. You can't.

It's too thick on the trails. There's going to be a slab-a-lance over there. Just a meat-a-lance. There's a lot of meat going through. Meat and hair. Straight slab-a-lance over there just a meat a lot of meat going meat and hair straight flabbalance over there dude it's gonna look like a philly cheese steak at chili's just going down the aisle i don't think chili's has philly cheese you know where i was going with it though dude open up fucking chili's is all i'm saying, man. Them bitches are open. Because when I was like, hey, are restaurants open in Houston? Some fan sent me a fucking live video of him in Chili's.

You would have thought it was a fucking corn concert. Really? This thing was slapping, dude. They ran out of baby back ribs. Oh, really? Yeah, man. Oh, man. I can't believe they killed babies for that shit, man.

That's unbelievable, dude but you knew something good was in them every time i see a baby i said damn boy yeah you're talking about pigs right you better behave before i fucking slice your little ass up yep for some meal um yeah chin i like catching catfish though man i definitely realize that you catch anything on cat you could catch any bait and catch I like catching catfish, though, man. I definitely realize that. You catch anything on cat. You can catch any bait and catch a catfish. Catfish are easy. Yeah. For sure.

You can use just junk. Yep. Yeah. We could just put a damn little Frito on there. Dog, you could have caught some crawfish. You just caught some fucking hot dog, and they clean on the hot dogs and just reel them bitches in. Oh, yeah, you can catch something on a hot dog.

I mean, catfish, you can catch anything on it really but those are the fish up in oregon man they're smart they're you see a fish go by with a little muck in front of them even the fish are white huh smart smart white fish don't get real urban yeah that's oregon in a nutshell smart white fish dude yeah yeah that's a lot of smart white fish up there. They got some fucking real trout, kokanee or something they got up there. Kokanee, yeah. It's like a salmon trout thingy. Hey, Jim, where can I go to fucking catch some salmon hitters when they jump up river backwards? You can go to the closest place I think is San Francisco.

That close? Yeah, there's some salmon runs every now and then. You have to time it though that sounds like a gay meat i think you gotta get off that website yeah just go to a club called upstream club upstream dj tonight wayne club upstream club upstream you just wait the DJ tonight, Wayne. Wayne. Club Upstream. Club Upstream. You just wait. The men come to you.

Oh, man. Oh, my God, dude. It's hard to keep all this mass hot. Dude, it's really hard. You know what's tough, dude? Yeah, I know what's tough. I'm telling you right now. I know what I'm telling you is really tough. It's a struggle to talk about it, but it's hard to keep an erect shit as I get older.

Is it really? Yeah, dude. Oh, man. I don't know what's harder, you trying to catch fish or me keeping an erection. Oh, man. Either way, not good. It's hard to get that hot, long one going either way, brother. Stop, dude.

I'll tell you that, man. Wet catfish don't work for either of them. Oh, man. But the thing is, Brandon, it's not just you man you know 40 of men by age 40 struggle from not being able to get and maintain dude that makes me feel better there's nothing worse when you got that limp noodle oh it goes like what's wrong with that thing why does it look like that why is it so big and long but drowsy yeah you get a million excuses oh yeah i used to have to do the thing where i would put a popsicle stick next to it and tie it next to it you know what's what's this sleepy anaconda doing the

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Oh, I've had those, man. I was just talking about it on this past weekend, dude. They inject you, and for like five hours, you've got to sit there and make sure it works. Damn, you did the old one. Oh, harrowing. It is harrowing, dude. Thick needle. So scary, dude. Thick needle. So scary, yeah.

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Oh, wow. Got mom on him. You got your mamas on it? oh and look she's texting faster than ever now dude i heard your mom's about to answer the tour de france oh she's texting faster she's texting faster different languages oh she's complaining about stuff that she never used to complain about she's really active the world's a lot more green when you got athletic greens in your bloodstream yep it's the one thing, Brendan. The only thing that health expert, dietician, athletists, and top performers agree on is that perfect diet doesn't exist.

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What the fuck is this? Well, last week, Kat wore a skirt, and we didn't see anything, but a lot of creeps were commenting on it. So we asked her if she wanted to share some of her creepier deeps. And where do they comment on Kat's skirt at? There was a lot of YouTube comments, but then we just asked to see her DMs, and she was cool with it, and she shared some of the weirder ones. I like how YouTube will censor us or demonetize us for talking about gay dudes and Sam Fran and salmon, but then let the comments go rampant on cat. They're like, ah, that's okay.

That's freedom of speech, man. You gotta let them do what they think. Yeah, but the scum of the earth is on there. So I don't know if cat would want to read them. I would rather not be recorded saying these things. Okay. God damn. Smart. Nicks are, yeah. Smart nicks. Okay. Go on, then. Smart.

Nick's already out. Smart Nick's. Probation. Ten steps ahead of us. Violates many orders Nick's obeying by. Fool me once, shave on me. There you go. So this gentleman says he wants to be, he says, I want to be your loser pay pig.

Do you have a PayPal? Low key want to be your toy pay pig do you have a paypal low-key want to be your toilet what's a pay pig though uh he basically just wants to give me money oh so you so you want you to be his sugar baby kind of but just like there's nothing really in it for him other than to give me money oh but you accept the money it makes him feel some sort of Yeah, for sure do that, right? He said, for sure do this Should we do this? I don't know He just sends you money? He has zero followers, so that's a bad sign

Most people will send me these things through Burner accounts It's not their actual account Oh, also known as trolls Yeah Keep going Isn't that Jeff Burner that works at the Comedy Store? That guy seems like he this is my this is a uh man

yes this is one of my personal favorites he says can i slurp oatmeal out of your ass and he said he used to send me this once every week or so. God damn it, I like this guy. First of all, though, the word slurp makes me feel sick. Why did he say slurp, dude? Oh, my God. Can I eat oatmeal out of your ass is a way a gentleman would ask. Slurp?

What kind of degenerate uses the word slurp? No, a gentleman would be like, hey, good day, miss. What's on the rear menu today? Oatmeal, possibly? With a little brown sugar. I like that, rear menu. Can I slurp oatmeal out of your ass? Oh, this guy is a real vulgar guy.

Apparently he works at the Pawn Star shop. Hold on, dude. He looks like a... Bring his picture back up. He looks like he definitely plays... He looks like he probably plays center on a little person basketball team. He looks like

the newest member of Pawn Stars, dude. Go trade your shit in. He looks like a member of Pawn Stars. This dude looks like he friggin looks like a member of Pond Stars. This dude looks like he freaking lives in a small body of water and eats cat food every now and then. Apparently he wants to eat

cat's ass. With oatmeal. Well, if it's steel cut oats, man, those are really good at lowering your cholesterol. You have a point, man. Eating ass and oatmeal is a balanced breakfast. This is what he's trying to do, Kat. This show is going downhill, man.

We've got a whole lot better. Keep going, Kat. This one comes in three parts. Oh, my God, man. You have to log on to a church site. This guy, he starts off by saying, I'll lick your butt clean for real. For real.

Oh, my God, sorry. I meant for real. For real. Oh, my God. Sorry. I meant for real. For real. Oh, good thing you corrected him. Oh, my God. I'm so out of turn here. Oh, my God.

Sorry. I mean, for real. For real. And this guy is. Do we know anything about this guy or who is he? He seems like an out. He seems really out. What's his picture?

He seems outlandish, huh? These trolls and their pants. What if he's that dog, though, in the picture? Yeah, there's's a dog what if that's just his owner in the background if he's the dog that's all he that's his that's his move that's the best he has to offer if he's a dog man yeah i'll lick your butt clean he'll lick anybody's butt clean man that's what they do all dogs lick ass we know this yeah this has got to stop and they all don't go to heaven don't get it twisted. Yeah, and first of all,

this dog is already obviously dating a male crossing guard. Look at that picture. We can get a tightening picture on that guy. Yeah, that was sent at basically 11 at night. What do you think he was doing when he sent that cat? Damn. 11 at night. I feel like he probably just finished watching King Listing.

Yeah, that's what we're going to say. And then he was like, here we go. Oh, that's right. This was a Thursday night. Saw you in the dress. What's this? This was a comment on one of my photos. This guy says, if it took my

grandpa killing half of your people in the war to get you to come to America, well worth the price. Amen, dude. And was that a Memorial Day exit? That was, man. Yeah, a couple of days before. Bonus points for this man

for Memorial Day. And also, that's a goddamn American if I've ever seen one. Amen, brother. K-W-B-U-R-R-S 1-1-1-2. Way to go, man.

And how about Kat with the quickness? one minute she got that screenshot in case this guy had any regrets if it took my grandpa killing half your people no more to get you to come to america well worth the price wow that's love right there oh yeah this is 9 000 day fiance right there this is a long haul move 24 year. 24-year fiancé, dude. This is crazy. This is napalm fiancé. Oh, yeah. Napalm. Damn.

You got more? We got one more. This one's probably the bluest, but I don't know. I'm sure you're keeping it PG for our friend Theo here, so he doesn't throw up. I made sure not to show the two explicit ones. Okay. Oh, and dick pics? Oh, yeah.

I have to do that. Oh, show those off-air to me, Kat. Just show a drawing maybe of them. This guy says, I would suck your dad's dick if I could smell your fart. What?

Oh, my God. That one's borderline. I don't know. Borderline what, Nick? Allowed on the show. I don't know. Too much? Damn.

Bo KR 94. Yeah, let's call these people out. This kind of stuff has to stop. I'd love to get a real picture of Bo R94. Yeah. Just offer it. Look, just keep it chill, man. Right before he said this, mom goes, what the hell are you doing down there?

Nothing. I'm busy. Fuck. They all generally kind of look the same though I will say when they do have a photo they generally have a look yeah all of them do

and they all look like this dude first of all this is is that the ghost of Christmas past this is this is the last cameo that Jerry Sloan ever did

it is This is the last cameo that Jerry Sloan ever did. It is. Boy, Jeff Hornacek looks like shit. Bro, Jeff should get more than his horn checked. This guy ain't doing well. This dude will haunt me in my fucking dreams, dog. Damn, freaking Brian Callen needs another transfusion. Brian Callen will be in Houston this weekend.

I like that he's supporting Brendan's other endeavors, though. There's a chance Brian Callen will be in Houston this weekend. There's a chance. We can't guarantee he'll make it for Friday, though. But this guy sent in, this has nothing to do with Cat. He sent's a chance. We can't guarantee I'll make it for Friday. But this guy sent in, this has nothing to do with Cat. He sent in a video. He's just a fan and he wanted to do

his own segment, Flop My Paw. Okay. Damn, he's yelling at us. Oh, shit. Big fan of this show. I'm Maury and I'm 92 years old.

I'm a rap artist. I rap with my boy Frank. We're in quarantine right now, so he's not here. But we're going to submit ourselves to flaunt my power. Brendan, you look like the kind of kid that would call out, who shit their pants? Why, you're shitting your pants at the school bus. Theo, you look like the kind of kid that would also call out. Probably me. Love you guys. Gang, gang, butt nugs. Oh, wow.

Damn. Oh, gee. Wow. This dude is dirt ball, huh? Shit, dude. Beautiful, beautiful fella right there, huh? And what would you catch this kind of guy on, Shane? What bait would you use to catch this fella?

I would say typically just prunes.unes huh i like that throw a couple graham crackers that'd be coming in this room right now a couple open water prunes right there is this a real video they sent in yeah this was actually they they did this before king and the sting but he was like this is just like a sample of what we do okay but he was like, this is just like a sample of what we do. Okay. I'm not mad at it, dude. I'm not mad either, man. Let's hope they celebrate it, you know, to see the end. Yeah.

Let them live their life. Survive the Civil War, the Black Plague, and now hopefully Corona, dog. Oh, those guys are doing it, man. They're doing some shit, man. Those guys have been through a lot, man. Those guys are how old? 90 years old? 75 and 92. Damn, 75.

He's young. That's going to be you and Brian. A hundred percent. I mean, yeah, a hundred percent. Who's that young guy flirting with that older the young dude's obviously trying to freaking get laid i bet one of them is probably the old guy right i mean i don't know i feel like at that age this is an ad for farmers only what's going on that one the guy on the left has a pretty nice body on him. Yeah, considering he burnt his hand in a fucking World War I.

Look at his hand. You want that thing tickling your back? You want backdraft tickling your fucking back? Hey, who wants to see me do a trick with these matches? You have fucking firehouse subs over there fucking crawling up your back. Definitely, man. That dude is fucking...

That dude got that dead arm. Dude, here's what I'm saying. His arm is dead. No one noticed this thing. that dude got that dead arm dude his arm is dead no one noticed get an amputation bro that's savage dude when part of your body is dead and you still keep it on oh boy it's a zombie

dude he has gangrene on his fucking arm we're just all gonna mosey on past that that's your god damn mind that's gang gangrene that dude is a straight icon bro is that jeffrey tambor damn dude holy shit that guy definitely fucking doesn't use the, he definitely doesn't use that button to start his Traeger. That dude goes straight into the flames.

Oh, man. Damn, bro. I can't believe you boys missed that, dude. Bro, there's your bullet right there. I'm just telling you, man. You boys go hard in the paint, dude. My face hurts. Why is his arm like that? i'm just telling you man you boys go hard in the paint dude oh my face why is his arm like that i need answers now maybe they'll rap about it yeah

rap about that arm hopefully they live the next week to send in a video. Yeah. Rap about that hot reach or stay off the airwaves, brother. Rap about that fucking third-degree Bernie. Yeah, bro. You look like third-degree Bernie Sanders, bro. Third-degree weekend at Bernie's? Yeah, dude. Oh, gosh. Oh, man. here comes someone uh yeah so we we're gonna give this uh singing competition another shot these are all original cat songs that aren't raps

so they're all and they're all king of the sting theme yeah yeah oh fuck sick all right there's a show about anything it's's a show called The King and the Sting. Punk my uncle, flaunt my aunt. You can do whatever you want. That one man's man, bro. Oh, this is hotter than that guy's arm Brandon looks like he eats rolls of quarters Still looks like a mail order bride Put all jokes aside

I love you guys He's got the dang thing on his foot Let's hit the sheltered corner Catch a pelican, you boss Say whoa Don't touch me, bro Keep touching me, bro There we go. Even Chin's bobbling that head, man.

You feeling that, Chin? I like the harmonica and the beat. Somebody needs to give J.J. Reddick a 10-day contract is all I'm saying. Or J.J. Reddick. Somebody likes Tobey Maguire backing Spider-Man up in this bitch. Good job, man. It's incredible.

Yeah, that was cool. That guy's playing three, four instruments there. Yeah, you get on a Venice Beach show, they get the one-man band. He's a black dude. He'll have the fucking shambles on his shoulders. He plays the sax, guitar. Plays the fucking piano with his feet. Really?

Yeah, dog. Damn. And he plays a shambles. Morocco with his neck really yeah dog damn he plays a song he plays a shambles i don't know the name of them although that's him there when i was a kid i grew up on this dude yeah he's right there i think he died i could also be wesley snipes one man band in venice beach, I grew up on this dude. Yeah, him right there. I think he died. It could also be Wesley Snipes. One man band in Venice Beach.

Yeah, I grew up on this dude. In the summers, I grew up in Venice. Oh, shit. We always toss this bitch money. Get it all on our... Going back to that. What does it say? Get it all on our Esty store.

We ain't going to Esty. We ain't going to Esty. What the F, man? We ain't going to Esty. Now tell me if he's better than That fucking Brokeback Tobey Maguire He always played Michael Jackson

If I remember See the feet And the drums Yeah It's Michael Jackson right Yeah Is this the guy from the Howard Stern show? What was that guy's name?

Beetlejuice. Yeah. See, but he'll play that sax too now. And he's singing. You might have Perez. This is giving me, this makes me nervous watching this guy. I think if you get past three instruments, it's too much. Yeah, that was a real shit show.

Man, when I was a kid, I thought he was the shit. You did? Now I see this grown man, he clearly a mess. Oh, no. That's GarageBand. That's before GarageBand right there. Yeah, that being a good girl. That's back when, what are you going to say, Nick?

I was just going to say that the first one was Mark from Massachusetts, Toby McGuire. Yeah, I think that Venice guy was fucking homeless, baby. Mark from Mass did a good job, huh? Yeah, he was nice. I was relaxed to that. Yeah, very relaxing. What do you think of that, Cat? Is that your kind of guy you think that guy is?

My kind of guy? Yeah. Any guy who can multitask and play a harmonica, good with me. You want me to slide in them DMs with a song for you? I mean, if he does, maybe I'll see it. I don't know. You'll see it. Maybe I'll see it. I don't know. You'll see it. Maybe I'll see it.

Maybe. Cat ain't even sure about that. What's this Alley Cat Zach Brown band got for us? Got that hipster ZZ Top. and bus lamps. Theo got cheeks and Brandon started streaks. King in the sting, oh yeah. It's nice. Big boy bike club ain't no quitter. Get you one of those gray block hitters.

King in the sting, oh yeah Brandon looks like he works security At a limousine service billed only for tweens Leo looks like he lifts weights at a truck stop Nick's eating that Wisconsin cheese Cat's bringing those Fuck boys to their knees Jim's wearing a mask Chappelle's playing

Hockey in the sun I am Brendan can't name Desserts or cheese TV shows got that CTV He was headless It ain't no thing Desserts are cheap TV shows got that CTD Heels, headlamps It ain't no thing

Just Louisiana boys Screaming out gang gang We got tattoo camps And bus lamps You got cheeks and bread And started streaks Yeah Oh yeah

Oh dude this This is good Oh, dude, this. I love this. This is really cool. God, this is good. Boy, this should be the anthem when the show ends. Yeah, it's not bad. This will leave you feeling good. Oh, yeah.

Do you play this the next week? You're like, I can not bad. This will leave you feeling good. Yeah. Do you play this the next week? You're like, I can't wait, man. Leave you feeling yourself. Thank you, brother. I appreciate that. Man, that was beautiful. Beautiful young man.

He was great. He was really good, man, that guy. And look at all that hair on his face, too. That's a commitment. Yeah. What's the longest you can grow that thing

you got going? This is it. Jesus. This shit sucks. I fucking hate it, bro. I get so fucking mad, bro. Well, shave. I can grow that thing you got going? This is it. Jesus. This shit sucks. I fucking hate it, bro. I get so fucking mad, bro. Well, shave. I can.

Why can't you shave? My girlfriend says you like it. Really? I'm just kidding. No, she didn't say that. I'm fooling y'all. Okay, she said it. You just don't want to do it?

No. Does she like it or not? Yes. She does? But I hate it. I was all patched up and shit, bro. It's a patchy. It's a patchy.

It's a little, yeah. I mean, I'm not one to talk. My beard's not great either. But you should shave and she'll be like, deal with it. Okay. Yeah, I mean, I think if you can... Should I? Yeah, I think maybe shave it up.

I mean, a haircut wouldn't kill you. Now, I like it you growing it out. It doesn't look bad growing it out. But if you're trying to get a haircut you got to quit with all this all the corona because i know a ton of barbers out there do you do then tell me bro drop these names damn i text you all the time you don't text me you never text i know that's right you're right you're right you're right he's put on some weight i didn't put on no weight bro i've been jumping i get all defensive whenever he talks about my weight.

Put on some white. And the last guy was Dan Lucille, and this is Jack Hutchinson. He talked to me, Dan. He had me feeling good. Here's Jack, though. Dan made me proud to do this show. Really? Yeah.

That was nice. That's true. That's how I felt. Good call about that. Let's see it. Let's see it, huh? Let's see this little Don. Boy, you crazy.

This boy don't jack off to Wonder Woman comics. This little coconut donut. Big round from the UFC, but now telling jokes, this is Joe. What the? This is Joe Exotic. Man. He sampled it a little bit. Really rad with poles and his jeans on his knees.

Too long, bread and show. with holes in his jeans on his knees too long bread and show got a deep voice for a kid his name is Theo Vaughn and his has too long and he's lucky that he's still alive damn Doug cause he was homeschooled trying to be cool

With a mullet in his mind Something ain't right Oh, King and the Sting I've got some views for you Oh, King and the Sting You won't see this shit on the news. Oh, King and the Sting. Brandon says he's not gay, but he really loves shoes.

Oh, King and the Sting. Can't be a sneakerhead, huh? Yeah, dude. I wish he would lick his lips more during that. Moving on to Nick. Yeah, I think he's homeless. Really needs to add

a few pounds. This guy's ripping. Is that about Nick? I think so. Then there's Chinny Chin with his black mask like a ninja. Better hide your pounds. I feel like his dad's saying this and he's over. About cats is looking really fine.

A lot of weirdos in your DMs. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I'm a gentleman Instead of a date I'ma ask to be your friend Okay. Oh, that's nice.

That was serious. Shut it down, dude. Yeah, this dude needs a friend. This guy, he seemed like one of those kids that's born without a liver, you know? Yeah, he grew up in the psych ward or some shit. No, no. Without a liver, you don't go to the psych up in the psych war or some shit. No, no. Without a liver, you don't go to the psych war.

I don't know how they do it, man. This kid seems a little off. It was a very Joe Exotic vibe. He sampled the song a little bit. I think it was the same beat, but yeah, original lyrics. Yeah, same vibe. That was good, though. That's crazy the voice was that deep.

No one beats that hipster ZZ Top, though. That shit was fire. Yeah. Daniel Lucille, what's his name? Yeah, Daniel Lucille. Daniel Lucille, yeah. Nobody beats real Daniel Lucille came through with that hitter right there. And that right there.

That should be the end credits for the episode. Oh, yeah. And that one right there I feel like was good. If you're leaving your wife or something and driving out of town, I'd listen to that one. Me too. But if you're doing something else, I'd listen to something else. Yeah, that's fair.

You know? True. But good submissions, though, man. Those were really good. Some real beautiful hits. Especially for King of the Sting only. Yeah, what do you think, Chan? You're the musical man here.

I'm with Brendan, the second guy. He has like an older soul, country style. Yeah, he seemed friendly. Yeah. Not the big boy din at the end, but you know how I'm getting at. Yeah. Yeah. We got one debate club and one king in her sting it left.

Okay. Here's the debate club. Theo, this is JP. Come to you from Augusta, Georgia, home of the Augusta Green Jackets, minor league baseball team. And I'm coming to you with a debate club. Who should Theo date next? Carly or Hannah?

That Alabama catfish noodler hitter or that Los Angeles Korean barbecue eating dick titter? Gang, gang gang buzz buzz oh my god or that cream barbecue big tit eating he kind of hell married it there at the end

you gotta have a little bit of tit brother you know big tit Carly what's feeling you I think that that little fucking southern bell with the knuckle deep in the catfish is the way to go. Get you guys out there. Yeah, she seemed real nice. She is bad.

She is bad to the bone. That's a beautiful fish, too, man. The only thing that hates her is a catfish. That's true, huh? And she gets to serve up catfish, too. Every night, catfish. You know how this past weekend you caught no fish? Yep. You catch all the fish. Dang, boy. Yeah, too. Every night, catfish. You know how this past weekend you caught no fish? Yep.

You catch all the fish. Dang, boy. Yeah, dog. I'd love that. Get that grouper right down your fucking throat. Beat me in the face with that dirty grouper. That's what you like? You be slurping oatmeal all right now.

Damn. Dang. Hot Carl. Wow. 54% for Hot Carl I disagree Wow it's a neck and neck over there though Oh I can't believe they didn't go with Fish Woman Yeah let's do Fish Woman

I'll decal her Fish Woman What do you think Kat? I think Hannah is more of your girl Catfish Hannah with that southern twang That she's bodied up and has her shit together I don't know if you'd notice she was driving a 70 000 raptor truck yeah oh wow talking about me and my talking about me and my paul i'm like what the fuck wow dang she's a first team all baddie i

thought you said she was driving a rav4 did you tell me that nah that'd been sad oh yeah that wouldn't have helped her case dog and now hot car Carl tits here ain't no fucking slouch either. And here's Chin. Chin's ex. Chin's ex. That's right. Oh, Hannah has a manna. Motherfucker.

Who is that? You lying bitch. We don't know yet. We got fucking catfish, dude. We don't know yet. We got fucking catfish, dude. We don't know if that's her man. Maybe she just took him out for a nice hunt. Does anybody want to guess the weight of my blue cat before I post the video? Hint, it's not as big as my whatever.

Whatever. Does it say anything about the dude? No. That dude has a better body than both of us. I don't know about me dog oh i definitely might have better biceps than me but i don't think he has better nipples or better you have a better ass definitely you have better set of tits out the back let him know let him know is that a different dude oh no same guy with her again. You look... Oh, motherfucker. This is the kind of stuff. Dude, this shit that pisses us off, dude. Because I thought there was a real connection between you two. I'm no Hercule Farrow, brother, but I'll tell you this, man.

Tell you what, you can forget about my boy around shotgun and Raptor. Something's going on. He looks a little bit like Theo got kind of microwaved. They could be cousins. sure dude you know what he knows his way around a catfish it's neck and neck that's true man well look around a catfish i do i could catch a catfish and show that lady what's up but i ain't catching what you know i'm not doing maybe we should ask her hot carl's out there drinking that close to an open stove That seems risky Yeah Hot Carl took advantage of the situation And fucking drank seven fucking

What were you sipping on? Soju Well that was Chin who got her drunk and then left Oh damn He got her drunk and then one eye And then the interview Yeah her fucking tits man The whole time I was staring at her tits.

Next morning, I'm married. What the fuck? Nick sounded like little Nicky over there. Too close to the mic. Hot Carl, man. 54%. We'll see, man. You can't go wrong with either, but I don't know what Hot Carl does for a job.

Hannah had her shit together, dude. Had her shit together, dude? I don't know if reaching into large animals' mouths, bro, is really having her shit together. She does what she loves. That's a good point. But does she make a living doing it? I guess she could sell the fish. Big time.

Wow. Yeah. Never mind, then, man. I guess we'll see, man. I say go on a date with each of them. Let us film it and see how it goes. We'll see man i say go on a date with each of them let us film it and see how it goes we'll see what hannah you mean the backyard fucking sticks in that raptor mud slanging oatmeal slurping slapping yeah fish on the griddle boy she cooks a lot she has like videos of it oh yeah you looked her up huh what no i mean Did you or not? No, I mean, yeah.

You went deep down that profile. No, it was just saying she has a little thing that says she cooks. She's the baddest catfisher catcher in the world. That's true. Look, I think that right there is really the tiebreaker for me. Oh, you should see if you can catfisher. There's going to be something on the grill when I get home, you know? Yeah.

And I don't have to catch it. You don't have to do anything that's the beauty after about three weeks so eating catfish every night gets a little old seems like that's all she has i don't know but you could have catfish nuggets man catfish catfish popsicles what's what's hot carl gonna bring to the table though she took advantage of our friend chin here and drank all that fucking sake and barbecue and then and then was down to go an after party yeah and chin left her for his damn wife mother maybe that's what you should do with hannah go out with her and then come out with a wife oh wow damn pull the old catfish on her get that big put a yeah put just what if i just showed up with my hand down her throat like

get that big put a yeah put just what if i just showed up with my hand down her throat like i think you have to ask for consent first but it should be okay i feel like she'd be down well you never know if i put a ring in it she might true you never know man she lives in alabama though i live here she has a huge boyfriend these are all great points that you're making. Who has the word gun, I think, in his IG name. Yeah, these are great points. Carly's local and single, so

on the flip side. And she did make a pass at you. Yeah, maybe she did. She just kind of seemed like that. She's like, I'm pretty sure she's like, Theo, single, holla. She's like, Theo, holla. We'll see, man. we'll see what's up i think right now i'm just trying to take it easy i'm trying to eat local i'm trying to eat local man because she's far she lives far away doesn't she yeah she lives in orange there's no traffic right

now you can get your like real fast yeah but that i hit traffic coming that traffic's picking up i'm with theo he wants to slurp local we are moving the podcast to houston you're closer closer i probably would be closer not houston not houston yeah maybe austin ah but look man whatever happens dude i'm down for something we'll see what happens man we'll see local i'm gonna pray about it there you go i'm gonna pray about it pray all right here's a white right here. We'll close it out with one king it or sting it. And it's got like a supplementary video he sent in with it. It's my boy Robbie.

From Barstool. What's up, guys? I hope you're doing well. It's Robbie from Barstool, and I got a king it or sting it for you. Your boy Tom Segura has been going off on professional wrestling. Fans, wrestlers themselves, and he just put out a press conference as Mystic Rick. I don't know if you've seen this. I don't know.

King it or sting it for me. Gang, gang, buzz, buzz. We king and sting it. Tom. What's up, God? Tom and his antics with the WWE, or are we king and sting pro wrestling in general? I think Tom's antics and his character, Mystic Rick. I haven't seen any.

It pissed me off. Did you see this? It pissed you off? Yeah, let's watch this. Mr. Rick. Yeah, go ahead. You've called wrestling fans many names, comparing them to anti-vaxxers and flat earthers.

Yeah. You've also said, quote, they have diminished capacity. Yeah. Could you explain what you meant by that exactly? Would you like to take this moment to apologize? Oh, no. I meant that they're stupid. They're all beneath me.

You know, they're losers. If they want to come, you know, maybe clean up my toilet or whatever, I just spit on them while they're doing it. Just give them a little taste of the mystique. Hey, Rick, you're so strong, you could even withstand the ankle lock. Oh it's true. It's damn true. Mr. Grigg, what about the wrestlers themselves? Some of them have reached out to you saying they used to be fans of yours. Now they've been hurt by your remarks. How do you respond to that? Mission accomplished. What's up Solstice? Oh that was you. This is my parrot

Solstice. You know we always enter. This is my parrot, Solstice. You know, we always enter the ring together. Anybody wants to get the turkey slicer, come at me, man. Mystic Rick, you are never down for the count. You are the best there is, the best there was, and the best there ever will be. Just keep those genes high and tight and know that you are the excellence of execution in everything you do. You run a bike and had a heart attack? That's because his heart is... And then shut up my show in Calgary

in all sweats. The reason he had a heart attack is because his heart is filtering gin out of his blood. That's why. And I love him too. And I say that. Should we keep rolling? Let's keep rolling, man. It's just making me sick.

It's fake. Why can't I win a fake fight? Sign me up. Let's keep rolling. It's just making me sick. It's fake. Why can't I win a fake fight? Sign me up. Let's rehearse. And I'll whoop your fake ass. Mr. Crack is the strongest and the best. And he throws it down in the bedroom the best. My main man, Mystic Rick.

You're the champ. And I'm the one to tell you. So keep feathering it, brother. And congrats on your beautiful, exotic, and extremely hot wife, classy Christina. He wants to slurp Christina's ass. Hardy, Cody, Sammy, Guadalvera, the Spanish sizzle steak. You can get it too. You appreciate it in your language.

Mira, si quieres, yo me voy a Houston y peleamos en esta más rica deporte que te encanta. Cuando quieres, huevón. Dime nomás, llámame. You understand? Any one of you fake-ass athletes can get this fake punch thrown at your fake face. Mr. Greek in Espanol. No more questions. I'm late.

I have a caviar tasting in my McLaren. Y'all can suck my dick. That was cold. Eat my scrum. Damn. Oh, man. Damn. That was fantastic. eat my scrum damn oh man damn that was fantastic damn

that shit was hilarious his hat says got cum no you notice that Theo ain't laughing bro I just think it's just messed up

he was part of that wrestling world man you know I just think it's messed up I just think you know they obviously use these older guys, Ric Flair and these guys on Cam Jones.

He honeydicked them. Yeah, he totally did. He totally did, man. The turkey slicer, dude. Dude, Ric Flair looks like he's full of cheese. Never even heard of that. Never even heard of that. Yeah, he does.

Ric Flair definitely looks like he's got a strong case of Gruyere in his piece. Ric Flair's flared up, dog. Oh, yeah. He's more flair than Ric, bro. Dude, Bret the Hitman Hart came to my show in Calgary. And, you know, he's cool. I used to do this Hulk Hogan bit. And the owner of the Yuck Yucks goes, hey, man, we got Bret the Hitman Hart coming.

And he's basically, you know, he he's our staple here in Calgary. And he's WWE guy. So cut the shit with the Hulk Hogan bit tonight. I was like, yeah, right. I did it. And then he came back backstage in all sweats. I was like, oh, I'm glad you dressed up. But he came back.

And he wouldn't look at me. He just stared at my brother. Damn. He just stared literally through my brother's soul and told old school stories. Wow. Yeah, it was great. Dude, that's awesome, man. Brett the Hitman Hart.

He was super friendly. Dude, he was a legend, bro. Dude, and his brother. Marty Gianetti. Owen. Owen Hart. Owen Hart fell off the top. He was going to do a stunt and fell off the top and died.

I remember when that happened. Crazy, huh? That was pretty sad, dude. And he's Canadian, huh? He's from Calgary, yeah. Calgary, Alberta. His whole family, they're like a huge, they're basically like the fucking J.J. Watts. Really?

Yeah. Wow. Does he have daughters that wrestle? I should say the Mannings. He's been through it all, man. But yeah, I just, I say, what did he say, King it or Sting it, man? Yeah, Mystic Rick I sting it

Damn I think Mr. Mr. Mr. Rick What's his name Mr. Dick or whatever Snot Richard I can't

I'm with you I want to ride with you here But I'm with it With the fake sports It's not a sport What they do is It's not fake Brendan It's pretty fake

Wow I mean it's challenging it's tough but so is mickey on ice yeah you got you know the right we'll see what the rat king says yeah i think the rat kings have something to say about this wrecking and coming hot off the top ropes but make sure you rehearse it before it's the only way to come in brother hot he wants that fucking swiss wheelchair i'll give it to him hell Hell yeah. Oil up, dog. Oil them gears up and fucking come off that truck. I know how to do it, dude. I don't know if I need tips or not, bro.

Bro, I'm not taking it from somebody who used to oil to go in a UFC. There are definitely videos out there of Brennan getting Pam sprayed on his back. Dude, oil yourself up. He's like, put the stuff with garlic on. Make sure there's garlic in it. Oh, this is the original? Nuh-uh. You got the wrong one out of my bag.

What am I fighting here? A flank steak? Get your fake tan spray on. Oil that fucking Lego cheese-covered body up. Come off that top rope hot, dude. If you want it, you'll get some of it too, boy. All right, bud. Meet me at 240, son.

And meet me at 2000, Fat Rick or whatever that guy's name is, dude. Whatever that freaking... Mystic Rick. Yeah, whatever. That fucking Walmart damn cross-dresser, whatever his name is. That freaking salt intake victim. I feel like, Nick, you're a WWE fan, huh? I watched a lot in the 90s.

I kind of stopped when I was 13. Me too. I was big in the 90s. And then I grew up, you know? I did not know adults were going to be watching it when I was 13. I was like, you grow out of this. You got to stop. But then some adults just keep on powering through it.

It's real to me. Damn it. Is it big in the Asian community, Jim? What do you guys have? I don't think so at all well but no wrestling's big in Asia they have a whole league Japan

Japan for sure I don't think Korea does it at all though to be honest you guys do K-pop yeah yeah you guys sing and what else

and drift cars and drift cars too that's Japanese too well I have a huge issue with Asians in motion has always been my issue bro you put I love Asians okay there's a couple asians in here right but what i'm saying is you put an asian still somewhere they do a great job right

iwo jima for example hiding in the hillside killed i don't even know how many people were trying to take that island pearl harbor yeah they were stationed right but i'm just saying you get asian emotion that's when it gets frisky yeah kamikazes yeah kamikazes oh i'm gonna take this plane for a spin no you're not nick a whiskey yeah yeah what they made that it's not yeah but that doesn't mean you do it but what i'm saying is a still asian it's the best thing you can have man a still asian can make all the right moves sure you send you put you push that asian down head of head them downhill a little bit then you got power too much yeah it's just too much going on in the in the in the wheelhouse you know crash something i think yeah it's just too much i think

asians are better still you know from a still position yeah crouching tiger remember that that movie what what do you mean that's your son dude i know i never saw the movie though oh i didn't either man crouching tiger hidden dragon yeah is it good chin i didn't watch you, but that's like Chinese, I think. Okay. But he was saying Asians in general. How do you guys feel about that, though, when I say Asians in motion are more of a liability

than still Asians? Does that feel, does that ring into your... I do my best work when I'm stationed. There you go. Singing, making music, on the computer, engineering, editing. Name the best Asian F1 driver. stationary there you go right singing making music on the computer engineering editing yep name the best asian f1 driver fishing nascar fishing yeah i'm trying to help your point out

the best asian stunt pilot i don't know best asian uh sprinter yeah even sprinting i think it's risky trouble but also when you get to uh what is that thing called where they pull the thing and the thing goes oh skeet shooting yeah asians great at skeet shooting top 20 skeet shooters let's see if there's an asian in it well they did develop duck hunter so you might be onto something yep that was toshiba toshiba toshiba international well we could probably tell by the names yep top men i'm singing it cambodia right there i'm seeing that uh and indians number one yeah india russian german italian sweden no american huh okay it's a crock of

shit so hit or miss on that part okay your point was well made though what do you think about a cat if i say that does that feel like it could be real korean there he is yeah it feels like there's some truth chinese chinese korean and i'm not saying that I'm... Russia, also considered Asia. I just think some ethnicities overall have a little bit more acumen for certain things. I think Asian people, I think, tend to be better from a tactical position. Yeah, you're flirting with racism, but I'm trying to back up.

I'm going to jump off pretty soon here. Okay. Because this train's going fast to Racist Town. And I want off. Ding, ding, ding. I want off. Yeah. Oh, you bought the tickets, though.

That's the crazy part. But if you look right here on these skeet shooters, Korea is ahead of USA right there. Well, China and Russia is ahead of us, too. Wow. Damn. So right there, man. Right there. Just goes to tell you something. Damn, China and Russia's ahead of us, too. Wow. Damn. So right there, man. Right there. Just goes to tell you something. Damn, and they're young. Born in 1996.

Yang Ho, Yang Aoran, and Zhao Yong... Kim Yong Hung. There you go. Kim Yong Hung. Is that right, Chang? Sounds right to me. Jong Hyun. Jong Hyun. Jong Hyun. Jong Hyun. 20-year- old prodigy Jang shit Jang

Chang Hong boy Jang Chang Hong who is it Chang Chang Hong Chang Chang Hong oh my god what did he say he tried to say

that one which one he said who is it the name I loved his commitment. Yeah, he tried. Weezy King.

Damn, there ain't shit. Americans ain't on here. That's what I'm telling you, you freak. That we're not good at that kind of stuff. We're more like, all right, let's do it in motion. Yeah, I'm getting off the train. King, king, king, king. No, I just think that...

What other examples you got? God, those are a couple of good examples, I thought. And look, we had one guy on there, Sherry Timothy, was our only guy on there. Was he from the States? The only American named Sherry Timothy. That's because we don't give a fuck about that sport. Ski shooting's a real deal, man. Nah.

Damn, who's that little skeet, the third one in? This is Timothy What exactly is it That's Tim Sherry right there That boy can shoot a gun That boy can shoot It's when something flies out in front of you And you shoot it

Oh okay Proud of USA But you see a lot of There are a lot of Asian train conductors or no In Asia yeah I don't think in the States or around the world. In Japan, there's a train conductor that I think is

a cat. See? That's the kind of shit I'm talking about. Not a lot of Asian bike riders. No. Oh, professional. Okay, yeah. Yeah, they're amateur. But there's also, in the Guinness Book of World Records,

there's that one Asian person that had 17 people on the bicycle. Remember that picture from the Guinness Book of World Records? I used to love that book. Oh, so good. Man, that Indian dude had the longest nails. Oh, that shit was gross. Oh, God. That dirt all up on him.

He was just hanging like that. Yeah. Tallest lady. Teeth were hanging out. Yeah. Tallest lady. Yeah. Was it?

Yeah, tallest lady. Remember that picture? Oh, shit. doesn't that look fun yeah it does man i guess i want to be the guy in yellow that's you on the back for sure in that picture you go to that picture yeah i don't want to be the guy in yellow i do man not me I don't want to be the guy I don't want to be the guy In blue dude With the jeans on Driving that bitch I don't want to be The yellow guy I don't want to be

The other dude Facing the other way Holding the dude In yellow Dick to dick Trunk to trunk bro Nah man We going nuts to butts

I ain't doing this game If you look closely there's a guy in green in between because there's an arm coming out he's going teeth to dick nah man nuts to butts only i ain't playing this game bro this is insane it's crazy dude see that's the kind of stuff i'm talking about man oh they set another world record these this is a indian team they have another world record? This is an Indian team. They have the current record of motorcycle. But then they're on the thing.

It has fucking planks on the side. Well, how is he supposed to get 20 people on that bitch? Not build planks? That's fucking stupid. 58 men rode on it. 58? I wonder if they take off the sides once they get going. No.

They have to, right? No, they just ride like, okay. That's a trolley and San Fran ride coming from. That ain't shit, bro. They did it. Damn. Did what? Yeah, that was pretty easy.

That doesn't look like 56 people were on that. It really didn't, huh? I like the poor. See, that's gangster shit. That's what I like, that old school real move. Yamaha should sponsor them boys. Especially the little one in yellow. How are they not an American talent?

Yeah, that guy. There's a couple guys that aren't even facing the way that it's going. That's the scariest thing. Going trunk to trunk. Nuts to butts, bro. That's how you sleep, too. Nuts to trunk bro that's how you sleep too nuts to butts that's it that it mm-hmm all right man well good to be back in here man glad you made it safe yeah good to be back man dog glad to be back I'm gonna

get stuff to get some fishing tips from chin yeah sure time up dude hit me up I didn't think about it oh i figured you were catching fish it was harrowing out there embarrassing too pretending you're catching something telling your girl you better get ready to eat tonight girl y'all we gonna be jumping how many catches zero and then you go to a mexican restaurant mexican oregon she all, way to go, Theo. Yeah, tough time.

Talking all that shit. They be jumping tonight, girl. I hope you hungry. I hope you hungry. Is that wet catfish? It sure is. Dude, I bought some shady rods and reels, too. It was a tough go.

Tough go. I got to make a more valiant effort next time. You got it, dude. You got it. It's hard to fish locally, though, isn't it, Chen? There's nothing here. It sucks. LA, Orange County sucks.

You'll go and fish, right, Chen? Don't you fish off Lake Santa Monica pier for homes and homeless shit? Not the pier, but the actual beach, the surf. Wait, Chico Ortiz does it a lot. But he has a boat, and he goes out, yeah. He goes way out. I go to the harbor only. He catches some crazy shit.

Tuna. Yeah, he catches a lot of tuna. Do you slaughter him when you get him? If I catch it, that's one of my favorite things to do. Of course. Kill it right there and eat it right there. Oh, you eat the sashimi right there? No, I'll actually cook it with a portable stove.

You eat it right on the beach? I don't think I've done it on the beach because it's been really tough to catch them on the beach, but other places. But you'll slice it up right there? Fresh. I know how to gut a trout, like, really, really fast. Praise God, dude. I'd watch that, huh? Getting hard a little.

Me too, a tad, dude. That's some Dexter shit. A little how-to video from Chin? That'd be cool. If we can catch a trout. It'd get flagged on YouTube Let's do it You know they do that too They'll demonetize

If you show You killing the fish You just blink it out Real quick Blank it out And how do you take These fish out Chin You slap them on the boat

I like to take a rock And hit it in the head Oh my god That was you That's so savage Chin But it knocks them out You take this rock and you hold it. Bang.

Bam. And it just instantly shocks them. So would you rather get knocked out and then someone open up your guts or would you rather have someone just open up your guts? We still talk about fish? The answer is neither, amigo. Why wouldn't you? Is there a more?

I guess you can't drown them, huh? That's stupid. I'm trying to think of how you could kill them. You could drown them in the air. You could just let them... That's torture, I think. That'd be torture. You mean...

Let them gasp for breath. You can't breathe. That'd be horrible. You could put a little bag over their head. I guess it's the same thing. You could waterboard them, get some answers out of them. Shut the fuck up. Nah, that's true dude yeah those fucking waterboard that bitch man you think those wet bitches don't have some answers in oh yeah see where the other fish be hiding

get that fish on the boat and waterboard that stupid fucking trout dog yeah duct tape that thing yeah you didn't think of that borrow some of fucking nick's duct tape that thing. Yeah, you didn't think of that. Borrow some of fucking Nick's duct tape. Yeah, borrow some of Nick's duct tape dynasty. That fuck tape, dog. Do it. Use that joke twice now. All right, we got new Cats merch, too. Let's let you guys know the website is up and running.

That shit is fire. That shit's fire, and it's coming right out of Houston Tejas. And you're there this weekend. Yeah, dog. That's crazy, man. Back on the road. I know. Definitely getting Corona.

Well. By Corona, I mean a six-pack, ice cold. Holla. Dang, you got it. Chappelle, where will you be? Anywhere? I'll be at my house jump roping. There you go.

And looking for a barber. And looking for a barber. You're going to tell me after. Yeah, I got you. Yeah, you're real. You want to come to Spokane with me? Yeah. Of course I do.

Definitely got to get your haircut. Did you DM any of those guys back, Kat, or no? No, I'll oftentimes screenshot it and then send it out to a bunch of friends. I would like to be included in that group chat. Yeah, same. You only want to see the dicks. That's the thing. I'm not trying to look at dick pics.

That's fair. Hey. Because if it's a photo, I won't open it up. That's fair. Everybody's fishing for something, bro. Do you tap it once so you get that blur? Yes, I will tap it once just so I can see what I'm working with, and then I'll decide whether to click again or not.

Do you like looking at them? No, because if it's something else, if it doesn't look like it'd be a dick, it might be something funny. Got it. It could be our boy's fucking burnt arm. I got a picture of somebody's dick in a hot dog bun. They put mustard and ketchup over it.

That's the shit I'm trying to see, Cap. That's fire. Was it a thick like hoggy, like a bratwurst? Oh, it was thick. What a brilliant idea. Damn. It was low-key American, too. Like, super American.

So American. Did he send out a memorial? No, 4th of July. So too, like super American. So American. They sent out a memorial cake. Fourth of July. So it was like the day after my birthday. So it was like a late birthday. Why didn't I think of that? Dude, I salute that, man. You too, dude.

That's freaking beautiful. Look, Brendan and Theo, fighter and weight. I got to go in and go hard in the paint. I do not think. I am in flow. Black Rifle Coffee, I'm ready to go. I do not think. I am in flow. Black Rifle Coffee, I'm ready to go. I need a sponsor. I am a monster.

About to open up with this at my concerts. Flow is contagious. Brows are outrageous. Thicker than girls that are Instagram famous. Damn. Hungry like I'm fresh off keto. Seeing red like Andrew Santino. Every song a hit like the great Bambino.

Brennan ate the queso and the quesaritos. But everything's gonna be fine. Hate on me. I do not mind. Theo looking like the type of dude that got a queso Mountain Dew on him at all times They sliding into my DMs A couple of them tried but couldn't beat him Quit playing like Nintendo DS

You don't want to smoke like Joey Diaz Meaning y'all edible, just got my eyebrows Threaded and I'm feeling incredible Brennan's son hit me up, he said it's too loud In the club, can you pick me up? King and the sting, ay King and the sting, ay King and the sting, bee sting, rat king, yeah

King and the sting, yeah King and the sting, got the bees in the trap Got the cheese on a string, yeah King and the sting, ay King and the sting, yeah King and the sting hey king and the sting yeah king and the sting bee sting rat king hey king and the sting yeah king and the sting got the bees in a trap got the cheese on a string