The Golden Hour - Episode 82: Banana Slugs

Episode Date: August 14, 2020

The guys bring in an All New Guest Culture Corner featuring Malik B and Ari Mannis and talk Theo's Nashville Trip, Ari's Big White Van, Malik's Louisiana Roots, Wrestle Fridays, Theo's Emails, College Football, Tone Loc, Short Rappers, Warm Books and much more!HelloFresh - https://hellofresh.com/80katsManscaped - https://manscaped.com/ use code: KINGSTINGHims - https://forhims.com/katsMyBookie - https://mybookie.ag/ enter promo code: KATSSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

I read the book, I feel like. Can I wear these? Hell yeah. You're probably cooler in them. God damn. Yeah, you look like a wrestler, man. You look like you're about to just dive off the top row of Swanton. You look like you're about to do a TED Talk on Rice Krispie Treats. Back off my broccolini Get your life together

It is Don't touch me bro I'm not touching you dude You know who gets the most hate? Drake Drake? Yeah Drake really

Tell him all Drake wins He does But online he gets So you're saying I'm kind of like Drake You're the Jewish Drake I'm saying

Drake might be Jewish I'm saying both of y'all Are like Drake Drake is you guys together he's black and jewish we're drake well hold on i'm the cool side yeah i'm the cool side yeah why is black the cool side just because of blm you're touching me that's right they're just like yeah you're cool right now i admit it you're cooler than me dude this is like heaven yeah this is like dividing drake we can hold hands and then we're i don't want to hold hands because I heard a lot of women watch this show. Just hold hands. I think this will be the closest we're going to get to having Drake on the show.

That's why we brought you guys here. I don't think Drake's... Well, who's the singing side? Let's just get that out there. I'll admit it. I'm the rapper. Alright, I'll sing. Okay, so you're the rapping side and you're the singing side? He's Marvin's room.

I'm 4 p.m. in Dallas. Oh, dang. I don't know the reference. I don't understand it. Well, it's a Drake song. Oh, that's why. Well, 6 p.m. in New York. I don't listen to rap.

He dissed Tiger. Dang, man. Damn, we got a real cock fest up in here, dude. I know. It's a real kind of. I said to Brendan, I hey Brendan let's get to let's try some get some different people in

in the culture corner you get more men more men dude we look like a boy band no direction look at your glasses look at the glasses in the band

what are those you the boy band you the drummer yeah I'm the drummer what's up are those Gucci glasses? Are they? What are those?

Yeah, they're Gucci. Be cool, dog. Be cool, bro. Brennan looks like the accountant for a male sex trafficking group. Hell yeah, dude. You look like a guy that comes and tells people if rainbows are to... Shit, I can't. I'm not mad at your outfit today, though, Doug.

Oh, you look at the guy that comes in and shows up and tells if rainbows are to specifications or not. You're like, yeah, this rainbow chick's over here. Yeah. Yeah. I'm going to just do the Drake ad-lib every time y'all say something. Like, yeah.

Is that what Drake does? Yeah, he does. Does he? Yeah. Yeah, he does that. I'm a something. Like, yeah. Is that what Drake does? Yeah, he does. Does he? Yeah. Yeah, he does that. Yeah, he totally does that. I am not, I'm not, not a Drake fan, but I don't know enough about him. I'll have to read up on him a little.

His music is fantastic. You know he's a child actor. Oh, yeah, that MTV show. He didn't grow up like Thug. He grew up like, he was a child actor. Well, I remember, yeah, one of his lyrics in the beginning was like, he borrowed his uncle's car. That was like the toughest thing that had happened to him. And he had it back late. He had I remember, yeah, one of his lyrics in the beginning was like he borrowed his uncle's car. That was like the toughest thing that had happened to him.

And he had it back late. Yeah, and then he parked a Rolls Royce in the driveway. Yeah, Degrassi, and he was in a wheelchair on the show. Of course. He was paralyzed. Jimmy, he was Jimmy on the game. Oh, he was playing handicap. Playing handicap. He was a basketball player. They shot him in the hallway. That's right. In his back, right? Yeah, in his back, yep.

Jimmy! And then he did that little thing. He was in a wheelchair, and then he has the same legs as malik wait what time i wait wait wait i got good wait i got no way you can feel them i got good hips though you do i got bad legs oh yeah they're bad legs oh really that's like um one of those english bulls i think that they're like that or no uh uh what's that australian shepherd oh they have little skinny legs they got bad legs yeah can you look that up australian I think they're like that. Or, no, what's that? Australian Shepherd. Oh, they have little skinny legs. They got bad legs, yeah.

Can you look that up? Australian Shepherd dysplasia, hip dysplasia? I don't think that. No, no, no. Those are just super athletic. There you go. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

He looks cute. I can be that. I can be that. Yeah, I can be that. That's you right there. That's Drake. That's the dog, Drake, right there. Oh, yeah. How was Nashville dog Drake right there. Wow.

Dog, how was Nashville? Nashville was nice, man. It was really, it was awesome. Went swimming. Meaning country folk? Oh, yeah. Everybody trying to be a cowboy out there. Everybody trying to be Luke Bryan.

People real, yeah. There's like a mix. The city is pretty, it's not not as country but i think once you get outside yeah you see people country and country music now especially with the the dudes who do it it's a little bit they're like country fuck boys they wear the hats they get the tight jeans yeah it's a little less country a little more fuck boy i want to add in tight jeans right now you're in asphalte now d. You're in Nashville now, Doug. You're in Nashville.

Yeah, maybe I'm just a fuckboy. There I am right there with that little man right there. Okay, there it is. And that was the only dark guy in Nashville right there was that dude. I love how the shirt is on. You and Darius Rucker. The only guys in Nashville. Yep. Ari, did we ever go there when we were touring or no?

That was like the one place we didn't go. But I'd like to. I should have came out with you. I want to go everywhere with you, man. Okay. Where are we going next? Let's take it down a notch. Dude, look, he's that road warrior, man.

Remember when we left you at that gas station on accident? That's not how I remember it, but... You guys rented an RV or something, like a tour bus? Yeah. We saved money by cutting out a tour bus, and we got a camper. I slept in it. And then he slept in a hotel because he's a bitch. Well, or because I'm a guy that can afford a hotel.

Or because the headline in comic, I'm sleeping in a bed. There's that. They left. There's that. I can get two girls in it. Yeah, no, there was one day where we were filming B-roll of the camper driving by. And they just kept driving by when I was outside filming the B-roll. So then I had to run down the street.

It's an interstate. Break a sweat on a freeway. Yeah, it was a freeway. They made me run down the side of a freeway to catch up to the camper. I've seen that scene in Little Miss Sunshine Yeah It hurt my feelings Did it?

I've never known you A to have feelings Honestly the entire time I've known you Very hard to find those But you just got a van though didn't you? I bought a big white van With a high roof I just decided to lean into being a white male comic and i just went with the van it's beautiful i mean it's scary what year 2000

it's 20 years old 78 000 miles paid 10 grand for it i'm converting it into a camper i'm just gonna go around the country and just meet people make it into a church man i would make it into a small church how many people can get in it? I think you could probably fit 12 to 15 people in there. Oh, yeah, that's a small. Oh, that's a youth group. Yeah, you got this. Boy Scouts. Are you guys in for the first service?

Nope. Hard pass for me. I'll be in shotgun. And your plan is just to explore the United States? Kind of just go where the wind takes me. I don't have any set plans. I was thinking go on Instagram and make a post. Who wants me to come out there with my van? And then follow that how are you gonna make money and pay for gas and shit

single just texting you guys for what chat with someone at night i mean you guys i feel like have a little bit of extra money and you could fund this and get involved on the ground floor. This is the pitch. How are we going to return on this, dude? Well, you know, you'll enjoy it. If you're starting up a church group, maybe you'll see a return. You'll enjoy seeing me and my travels, so the return is kind of an emotional return. This is Shark Tank, I feel like.

Yeah, and I'm going to go and pass. This is a bad episode of Shark Tank. This is Shark Tank. This is Min bad episode of Shark Tank. This is Shark Tank. This is Minnow Tank. I just feel like it'll make you feel good seeing me feel good. And that's a return. Sorry, I'm so disappointed. It's been great.

It's been hilarious. I'm trying to hang out with me. Hilarious. But now, Ari, you've been breaking the boundaries. Oh, sorry. No on the camper thing. That'd be a hard no for me. Sting it.

Yes. You don't need to decide right now. Just sleep on it. Okay, let me think. Decide tomorrow. Yeah on the camper thing. That'd be a hard no for me. Sting it. Yes. You don't need to decide right now. Just sleep on it. Okay, let me think. Decide tomorrow. Yeah, I'm out. The last thing I want to do is leave out of this room with any increments of this idea in my head.

So definitely no. I'll have to figure something else out. I'm kind of riding a lot on this pitch. Yeah. So I'm going to have to think about it. You did seem a little nervous walking into the studio. Because you had this whole pitch planned out. We're going to throw this one back and let it grow a little.

Okay? Okay. Yeah, what was I going to ask you about? What else? Did you say something? You said he's getting pretty deep into... The dark web? Oh, you've been dating over social social distancing lines haven't you i've been

not keeping social distancing i'm an anti-covid guy okay anti-masker and i know you had coronavirus so you're probably in agreement with me uh when you say anti-corona what do you i need we just gotta live our lives yeah i agree with that yeah just go out there listen i'm not 80 i don't want to stay inside and when yeah when someone tells me they don't want to meet up with me i'm just like grow up so so are you meeting these women on tinder we're talking about grinder mostly dma i dm a lot of people i like that oh wow and then do you say you know that's frowned upon too well yeah i talked to them frowned upon it just depends what age they are it's risky they're adults as far as i know.

Yeah. Okay. And yeah, I DM them, say, what's up? Make some small talk, get to know them a little bit. And then I say, well, you want to get some food or something? And then I'm like, are you out of your mind? Yeah, some people block me right away. Yeah.

You got to do indoor picnics. But that's how I know. That one's not the love of my life. Because the love of my life wouldn't block me or something like that. Dude, the crazy thing is, though, this is why I don't know if you can have a love your life sometimes enough and I care about you but you don't blink a lot whenever you talk and because I was really good secretion of it makes me think sometimes when people don't blink at all forever a psychopath well just not they're gonna find the love of their life it's kind of a red flag like hey i can't wait to meet the love of my life i just bought a van dude you know what girls like one thing they like eye contact they like intense eye contact

passionate i think there's a level to that though, you know? You're right. What about you? You've been crossing the social. Also we're in here with Ari Maness and Malik. I don't know Malik's last name. Oh, Malik B. Malik B. Do I introduce myself? Does the B stand for anything?

It stands for bravery. Damn. Okay. That's awesome. I mean, it depends on who asking the question though. Bravery Wilson. Last week you told me you stood for basketball. Well, yeah, that's true.

We had a girl, Bravery Wilson, at our school when I was growing up. What a great name. It was pretty cool. Is that Native American? What, Bravery? Yeah. No, my real last name. The B stands for Basil, like my last name.

Like it's Creole. Yeah. Oh, he's from Louisiana. Oh, you are? Yeah. Oh, nice. Where you go to high school up there? I went to Terra High's Creole. Yeah, mom. Yeah. Oh, he's from Louisiana. Oh, you are? Yeah. Oh, nice. Where'd you go to high school up there?

I went to Terra High School in Baton Rouge, Louisiana. Oh, wow. And then I moved Hurricane Katrina then I moved there. I forgot you two are from the same. That's crazy.

I felt it. Yeah, bro. Yeah. My brother lives off of government over off of like Kenmore by the Chase Bank

off of government. On government? Yeah. In Baton Rouge? Yeah. Okay, yeah, okay. Government and airline highway. Yeah. Okay, I got you. I thought you said he lives off of government. On government? Yeah. In Baton Rouge? Yeah. Okay, yeah, okay. Government and airline highway. Yeah.

Okay, I got you. I thought you said he lives off the government. No. Well, I knew, I knew though. He might now. That's a low blow for you, bro.

This is the guy with the Grateful Dead tattoo? Yeah. He owns a successful landscaping company, right? Checked out. Yeah. That all checked out there.

Everybody from the neighborhood I grew up in owns a successful landscaping company, right? Checked out, yeah. That all checked out, dude. Everybody from the neighborhood I grew up in owns a successful landscaping company. It's either landscaping or pressure washing. That was the big thing, bro. If you wanted to get out of my neighborhood, you had to get a pressure washer, bro. Sometimes I remember you'd see somebody get a pressure washer for Christmas,

and you're like, oh, fuck, you know? Ronnie made it. Ronnie's balling, man. He's going to wash his way to his dreams. Pressure washing's not a bad business. It's only about $1,000 for a good machine, and then you can make money fast. Not a huge overhead. You can kind of do it anywhere, right?

Water. You use their water. You hook up the hose. Unless they make you bring your own water people always need shit washed that's messed up because my dad was a painter he always had a pressure washer really yeah young age like yeah scared the hell out of me but i got a good grip now for things like that oh damn yeah that's cool man so if you get in a gun play or anything and i'm not this isn't any kind of racial profiling thing but if you get in a gun play you're the guy I'm not, this isn't any kind of racial profiling thing, but if you get in a gun play.

You're the guy. Yeah, you got that. Well, I don't know how to aim right because I never had a dad to teach me. Oh, I see. But you know how to wash right? Yeah, I know. Yeah. Of course, yeah.

Spraying houses. I'm the guy. Damn. Yeah, my dad was a contractor painter. Do a dry by washing. That would be insane. That would be dope. See, I listen, just like hop out.

Just wash people's cars for free. I do that. If you use dry by washing, would be insane that'd be dope see i listen just like hop on just wash people's cars for free not like these dry by washing you just roll up and just but but is anybody gonna like you know call the police on me oh yeah oh wait wait no wait i don't like that that's always a risk wait no i want a future i want yeah well i mean you have to go somewhere else for that all right i like that you can't guarantee that in america right now in this climate yeah that's crazy yeah spraying stuff yeah i should get a shirt that says spray man you gotta get fresh bro dude i've been fresh man i'm feeling hello oh dang get fresh dude hello fresh or bienvenidos con fresca yeah dog i'm talking about pre-measured ingredients and mouthwatering seasonal recipes delivered right to your door i know hello fresh i know you are man and one thing

that it is and look people say man i've heard you guys talk about this and i don't know and this and that my mouth's not watering yeah well look because you're not thinking about it like we're thinking about it yeah how are we thinking they send you a box inside of the box. What's in the box? Oh, I'll tell you what's in the box, dude. It's that fricking rad split of amazing foods, man. Some of the recipes will have like an onion, some pork. Yeah, a different glaze, a demi-glaze, man.

Hello Fresh offers so many recipes to choose from each week to help you break out your recipe rut, man. There's something for everybody, including low-calorie, vegetarian, family-friendly recipes every week. It's fun. Step outside of your comfort zone. You open up the box. You get one of the recipes, and you make it with the kiddo. Make it with the wife. Yeah, it takes 30 minutes, bro, some even 20 minutes. What are we doing, bro?

Make it with the side piece. Yeah, do whatever, man. And we have a discount for you right now. You will enjoy it if you've never tried it. I promise you, you will not, not enjoy it. Yeah, your mouth will be watering in no time. All you got to do is go to HelloFresh.com slash 80cats. Use the code 80cats to get a total of $80 off. Including free shipping on your first box. Additional restrictions apply. Please visit HelloFresh.com for more details. Again, that's HelloFresh.com slash 80KATS and use code 80CATS to get a total of $80 off, including free shipping on your first box. This episode is brought to you by Manscaped.

Heavy on the man. Yeah. We got a bunch of dudes in here. It's a brosy episode. Dude, I wanted to call Manscaped, but everybody in here needs Manscaped. Chin's looking more like one of the hottest chicks I've seen in a while. We've been in studio for a while. Chin's starting to look real proper, man.

Well, look, speaking of getting things looking proper, Manscaped is what I'm saying to you manscaped scape up your manhood yeah dude they have the lawnmower bro well it's part of the perfect package it's the it's the perfect package from manscaped it'll have your hairless balls really just feeling welcome yeah you don't have to nick them no more and that's not bleeding anymore they just released their sheer 2.0 nail kit you got some long nails what are you doing what are you doing what are you scratching people what are you trying to do you trying to live up a tree the shears 2.0 damn that perfect package also gives you the manscape crop preservative anti-chafing ball deodorant and moisturizer oh yeah you can tone up those testicles man take care of your body no more swamp ass son take care of it.

Trim your ass. Trim your buddy's ass, man. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, dude, help each other out, man. Get 20% off and free shipping with the code KINGSTING at manscaped.com. That's right. 20% off and free shipping with the code KINGSTING at manscaped.com. That's 20% off with free shipping at manscaped.com.

And use code KINGSTING. Make sure your gang gang is buzz buzzed. Oh, free shipping at manscaped.com. And use code KINGSTING. Make sure your gang gang is buzz buzzed. Oh, dang. With Manscaped. I'd still invest in that business over Ari's, though. Wow. Oh, the van. The van.

Dude, when you see him pressure washing, it's not going to make you happy. It's not going to bring you joy. It's going to make you $5. If it cleans my car, it does. You need a good outfit, I think, while you wash, though. Did you want to be a washer when you were young? Well, my dad had this all-white- Overalls?

Overalls and shirt, and he had tan boots, and he was very dark. My people used to make fun of him, like, your dad looked like a lit cigarette. So I used to get mad. Oh, damn, that's a good one. I used to get mad. I was like, D, change your outfit. Never did. So I just-

Dude, here's my idea for you. Just spitballing ideas. Oh, God. You do overall. This is going to have a lot of balling on it. change your outfit never did so i just dude here's my idea for you just spitballing ideas okay you do have a lot of balling on here's the thing you do overalls no tea underneath oh that's how to back out yeah okay get get get the traps out for the ladies okay that's a good point yeah okay i'll watch it right now thunder down under thunder down under thunder down under paint uh washing Thunder Down Under Thunder Down Under washing business there it is yeah

spray women houses for free no not for free now see no no no this is where the Jewish guy got nothing for free

you guys should partner up on this now I'm into it you guys should partner up on this okay this is short take now see this is why

we need partnerships of different cultures Drake's car washing business Drake car washing business but what about and our first Thunder Under can be our business card you guys play Drake and Partnerships of different cultures, bro. Drake's car washing business. Drake car washing business. But what about that?

And our first Thunder and Under can be our business card. You guys play Drake and wash cars at the same time. Now that would be fire. You take your shirt off. I can take my shirt off. And you leave it on. Dude, I mean, some girls like dad bods. That's true.

Or people, not just girls. Do you have the dad bod? What kind of bod do you have, do you think? Yeah, it's like skinny, fat guy. It's like a father figure. Do you have the dad bod? What kind of bod do you have, do you think? Yeah, it's like skinny, fat guy. It's like a father figure. Do you have kids, though? Do you have kids? No, not yet.

I'd like to have three of them. Dude, you have to blink when you say something like that. You can't. I'm serious, bro, and I love you, but if you don't blink when you say something, it just seems like you want to steal them and not have them by VO. It's weird to force blinks too because then it doesn't feel natural like i want to have three of them yeah that's a little weird yeah but it works a little

better still less creepy as i was picking out a burlap sack out of the back of his van i want three kids by the end by midnight tonight yeah he has a lindenberg baby shirt on this isn't gonna work you came over the crib we got that little pf changs heavy on the chains oh yeah that's true man we've been really cultural this weekend we had pf changs watch some fights yeah watch some fights and uh what was that bellator we're watching no ufc ufc yeah tiger tiger and you fucking oh yeah to play with bernard's son man then we gotta we actually got some footage of you guys in the backyard some uh cats in the wild here okay oh shit there's brendan with the wig

oh the power walk. Oh, shit. Is that us? Are you guys starting a competing business here? Yeah, exactly. Those brain bags are dope. Oh, wow. Them boys are living. You guys were.

I'm jacked. Oh, these guys must be rich, huh? Where do they live at? That really does look like me. Them boys are dope. Oh, these guys must be rich. Where do they live at? That really does look like me. Them boys are dope. I like that. I'm with it.

I'm with it. They're having fun. You've been doing shows. Have you guys been either of y'all been doing shows during this? With Brennan. Oh, that's right. You guys went on the road to Arizona. What was that like?

Was it normal? Super. You know what? A little too normal. That's probably why you got COVID. We don't have to Arizona went. What was that like? Was it normal? Super. You know what? A little too normal. That's probably why I got COVID. We don't have to show this. I don't understand why this is up. What's this?

Well, this is when you kind of like, I didn't know what I was doing. Oh, you posted this. Well, I just want to show like, don't ever be afraid to attack the bear. That's what I wanted. Who's the bear? Here's the thing. You got to drive with your legs, man. You got to hang them on the wall. Who's the best? Here's the thing.

You got to drive with your legs, man. You got to hang them on the wall. Who filmed this? I don't know. I guess Kevin. Kevin is not. I know. Kevin will never work here.

This is insane. It's hard to see who's winning and who won. I was winning up top. And then when he dropped the camera, that's when he kind of like ran into the home run. Well, here's the thing. They keep fucking with me. It's Wrestle Friday. I'm like, I don't want to wrestle on Friday. And I'm about to go on stage.

He's like, it's Wrestle Friday. I'm like, all right, man. Let's get it over with. In San Antonio, no footage. I did a better job. I handled my- You did do a better job. Yeah, I handled my-

There, yeah. That's a nice picture of you. I appreciate it. Are you doing comedy? Are you modeling i don't know i'm doing both a lot of people say i got good like a good chest ratio so i just wanted to keep posting that oh wow appreciate you man do a lot of people think that you are um somebody's brother and it's the wrong person yeah always i always always get the uh it's always two people

right it's either lance gross or Michael B. Jordan. Wow. And honestly, I don't look like either one of them. Oh, yeah. I could see a little bit. Michael B. Jordan? Yeah, exactly. He was in Friday Night Lights.

Yeah. And The Wire. Yeah. He was in The Wire? That looks like him. He was Wallace. Yeah, he was Wallace. I've got to watch it again.

I missed him. He was in Creed, too. Wow. You kind of look like that? No, I don't look like him. I wouldn't say you look like him. I mean, you're both – He looks more like Michael too. You kind of look like that? No, I don't look like him. I wouldn't say you look like him. I mean, you're both good looking. He looks more like Michael D-plus Jordan.

Michael A. Jordan made these shoes that have on that Brendan got. I'd even say Michael C. Jordan. That's better. The C. Jordan. We'll go Michael C. Jordan. D-plus. Give him a C at least yeah michael c jordan i like that d plus a little bit theo i thought we was both from louisiana you could at least

gave me a little higher grade you're right man i have a tendency to throw people under the under the d plus that was pretty good it was almost good i have a tendency to throw people under the d plus bus um i just don't know what to say man dude do you ever have i don't know man i sent an email before this show that i definitely should not have sent so this whole time i'm just thinking god i, I wish I'd not. To me? Send that email. Oh, no. Oh, no.

Because you know, Theo, man, if it's before 9 a.m., that email ain't going to be nice. It's going to be vicious, dude. I just checked my email. It wasn't me either. Oh, no. I'm going to check my phone. It's never good. If it's before noon, it ain't nice.

Notice how I don't answer the phone before 11 when you call? This almost feels like an intervention because everybody in here is after you. I've emailed before 9 a.m. And even before 4 a.m. If it's an early morning email, you're like, oh, shit, son. And I called Theo on it. We started arguing. He goes, man, my bad, man.

Let's not talk before noon anymore. And we don't. I do some of my worst work between the hours of 1 a.m. and 3 p.m. That meets a big window. It is. 3 p.m. No, so it's just. It's on's on your mind oh it's just like way i can feel like other people at the end of this email just getting furious was it a business email yeah yeah it was

a business email man to people that are a lot a lot businessier than me so wait for the response it's just like one of those things it's just like weighing in my brain anyway I didn't mean to bring it up I'm not trying to sidetrack the show but I wanted to just let you know what I was thinking about that's fair man you're dealing with that you know what I was thinking about. No, that's fair, man. You're dealing with that, you know? Oh, yeah. It'll be fine, man. I just don't like doing that. I'll tell you what's on my mind, which is weird. I hate Hollywood. I hate Hollywood, too.

But fucking college football might not be going, dude. Other conferences are jumping out now. And what are they? The LSU coach is going hard in the paint. He wants college football. He does? SEC might just do their own thing. They should.

Well, it's political now. You look at the Pac-12, a bunch of bitches, mainly Democratic states. Payne he wants college football. SEC might just do their own thing. They should. It's political now. You look at the Pac-12, a bunch of bitches, mainly Democratic states. Who else? Big Ten. Big Ten's out. But then Ohio State was like, all right, we'll just go play somewhere else. Exactly. They did?

Yeah, they're like, we'll jump with SEC. Nebraska was like, oh, you want to cancel? We'll jump with SEC. So you might just get one baller-ass conference. It'd be dope. Finally, man. we'll jump with sec so you might just get one baller ass conference finally dope finally man i wish that uh i wish that some of the schools don't need to be playing anymore no when connecticut was like connecticut was like i think we're out this year like we don't give a fuck what is it what is the black community saying about football are you guys we don't we still good you guys are

good yeah 100 but i mean we're on and off because OBJ, he just said we should be banning football this year. Really? Like a lot of black guys. OBJ? Yeah, yeah. He was like, we shouldn't be playing football. The guy that killed. Odell Beckham?

Yeah, Odell Beckham. Said we should cancel football? Yeah. Well, for one, he's on the Cleveland Browns, so let's just add that in. And two. Right. So, yeah. And two.

So, they already taking it easy if they're add that in. And two... So they already taking it easy on that team. But I'm saying a lot of black lives. He's trying to care about the players. I was like, you got helmet and gloves on. You can't catch it. And if you catch it, you can probably get rid of it. You can get somebody else's blood if you want.

You know what I'm saying? See, there it is. A lot of players these days, it's like they don't even want to be players anymore. They want to be players for the cl's like they don't even want to be players anymore. They want to be players for the clout, but they don't want to be players. You mean everyone wants to be Colin Kaepernick. And actually, or everybody, yeah, or people turn into a little bit more of an activist, I feel like, sometimes.

But, I don't know, maybe they're also really scared. I mean, black and Latino people get the coronavirus more, I think. Not if you're in shape, though. If you're in shape, they get it and they pass it it you know it's not it's not that big of a deal the kids in college are more likely to die driving to the campus than from corona oh wow and you gotta let them have it nick saban said their players they're safer at uh alabama than at home because you can get it from a bar hanging out but all this bitch ass owners who are not owners, but like the regents and all that who run the colleges. They know it's going to happen.

If one person dies, they don't want it on their hands. They don't give a fuck about kids. But if you go to college, somebody you know dies, man. Somebody's dying, bro. By going to college. Some parents send their fucking kids to college and be like, this little, we don't even care about this. You don't let that kid join a frat? Yeah.

Are you worried about Corona? He should have started a business. You see what them frat boys do? Eating dog food? Yeah. Damn. Damn, that's what they do? I don't know.

I never went through it, but I know those boys get saucy. They die all the time. Well, yeah, because they freaking party hard, bro. The hardest. Yeah, that's as hard as you can party. You die. Yeah, you're right. That's game over, dog. well they die all the time well they am because they freaking party hard bro the hardest yeah that's as hard as you can party you die yeah you're right that's game over but did you die and they're like yeah yeah yeah yeah my friend did god yeah a few friends that did yeah they were pledging and alan died you're like troy died that's such a brat yeah dude Troy passed away the worst is when somebody's named

Troy Troy yeah Brett did pass away the worst is if Troy somebody named Troy they uh

call themselves T-Roy T-Roy that's too much T-Roy T-Roy went too hard in the pain big bruh

T-Roy T-Roy's bad what do you think Ari what do you what are you hearing uh on the spectrum over there about um um see my family was a little it's scary to look at it's dangerous football's a pretty dangerous yeah ct i mean i it's fun to watch but i would never play it did you play you were in military school did you guys play in military school they had a team we were actually it was mandatory to go to the game so i'd watch every game and yeah the whole time just like military school did you go to college too yeah

what's what's uc santa cruz banana slug oh went the opposite way military to hippie and banana slugs are racial slur now also isn't it it could be yeah like an asian thing i'm not sure i wasn't thinking about that but now yellow right you could pick any color almost and call him a banana slug. Now, your school got famous from Pulp Fiction. Yeah, that shirt. John Travolta wore the banana slug shirt and then they sold a bunch of tees. I'll get you some. So, do you think anything about football?

I don't watch it. I'm not going to sit here and pretend like I follow football. So you don't care if it happens or not? No, yeah, I say let it happen. I want things to be like normal. So I think if it happened before, I want it to happen now. Was Nashville normal? Let me see.

Compared to L.A.? Because L.A. is the worst, right? Yeah, things were more open there. Things were more open. You could go to restaurants. I went and swam in like a lake out at this place, Piercy Priest Park, where you just pull up and just like, remember that lake we swam in in Oklahoma? Uh-huh.

Just like that kind of place. So you just pull up. Dirty, filled with fat kids. Yeah. Nice. Some kids have their shirts on. Yeah, some kids have their shirts on. Yeah, I love that. A lot of kids have shirts on. some guys have their shirts on yeah i love that

a lot of kids are shirts they should all leave them on it was especially in today's time with like yeah with comedians yeah kids should leave their shirts on i just want kids that should be a rule kids have to keep their shirts on at all times um yeah i'm trying to think so yeah went out to some restaurants did you get any good nashville uh oh yeah chicken hot sandwiches i went to this place called edley's what it was called there's some real famous place out there edley's east that's what it's called nick edley's east and i got a straight up east infection in my stomach it was good dude yeah oh that's barbecue yeah i'm talking about that nashville hot chicken oh uh dave's hot chicken no not and the bus boy there is a fan of the show, Landon.

Shout out Landon. Little Ginger. Little sun victim, bro. Oh, shit. Yeah. Little sun victim. Little sun victim. Little sun kiss here.

Yeah. This guy. Yeah, little fella. He was over there. Yeah, I forget the name of it. It's right downtown, though. It's right in the city. There's Nashville chicken hot sandwiches. Remember, Jen, I's two chick Nashville chicken hot sandwiches marriage yeah it's what you

call it there's a line goddamn door how the race right how the race oh the one here in Chinatown yeah it's Helen race no this place there's also a natural hot Hattie B's for fuck's sakes how do you be how do bees how it raises here now a cheese is a lot like two-hour line Yeah. I just got a call for pickup. For hot chicken? It's fantastic. Best hot chicken you have. I think Howlin' B's.

But what do you mean hot? Here's what I don't understand. What do they mean hot chicken? I'm talking about that deep-fried chicken breast doused in hot sauce, bro, with pickles, a bun. Wash it down with a nice Dr. Pepper. Maybe a big red. I don't know. Today's sponsor.

Bro, you losing your hair? You got some erectile dysfunction? You got a cold? How about you need some COVID-19 home tests? Well, him said, swing low, sweet chariot. Sure, man. Oh, hymns. Yeah, hymns. Hymns up, man.. Sure, man. Oh, hymns. Yeah, hymns.

Hymns up, man. My bad, man. 66% of men start to lose their hair by age 35. Check. Yep, check. Not really, but it's going into my eyebrows. Whatever. Listen, hymns helps you guys.

Thanks to science, hair loss can be optional. Brendan, let me tell them. Tell them. I have erectile dysfunction, okay? I have lost my hair. i've seen hair in the sink hair in my bed i don't own a cat what's happening limp wiener limp wiener i've woken up in the middle of the night and shined a light on my wiener and seen it sleeping on my thigh and saying wake up get up yeah that's over you've been napping for weeks yeah and i'll put a

thing of soap in a sock and beat it with it. Like, like a metal, like a full metal jacket. Yeah. You want don't full metal jacket your dick anymore, man. Use hymns right now. Few quick questions with a real licensed medical professional and for free. They'll do all that and see if you get FDA approved products to treat hair loss and your erectile dysfunction.

They approve it. And it shows up at your doorstep, a little package, discreet package. If you're not happy, dude, after 90 days, just email HIMSS, you get a full refund. Yeah, and look, here's the thing, guys. You want to take the best chance you can to have good wean or to have good hair.

You want to take that best chance. Why wouldn't you? Put your best foot forward, dude. Yeah, would you give a child a vitamin? Then give your weaner a little vitamin. Go to 4hims.com slash K-A-T-S. That's 4hims.com slash cats. Full refund of price paid available for first 90 days supply.

Refund request must be made between 90 and 180 days after product shipment. Get it. Prescription products require an online consultation with a medical professional who will determine if a prescription is appropriate. Restrictions apply. See website for full details and important safety information. I've always wanted to do that. Oh, dude.

NBA's back. Golf is back. UFC 252 this weekend, son. Oh, I can't wait, bro. DC Stipe. You want to watch it? You want to make bank, bro? You're damn right.

And you can do it with MyBookie. It's simple. You bet. You win. They pay, son. That's right. With MyBookie, it's simple you bet you win they pay son that's right with my bookie it's as simple as can be it's the only online sports book that loves the nba as much as you do yes join today

and my bookie will double your first deposit and not only will they match you dollar for dollar but they're also throwing a free ten dollar nba future bet just enter the promo code k-a-t-s to claim when signing up remember at my book bookie, the terms are simple. You bet you win. They pay. And it's so easy, man. The best thing I like about my book is it can be right up to fight time and

you can still get your bed in join today. And my bookie will double your first deposit. Not only will they match you dollar for dollar, but they're also throwing in a free $10 NBA future bet. Just enter promo code K-A-T-S to claim when signing up. Let's start the episode. Let's get into this show, man.

Thank you guys for joining us today. Malik and Ari. Thank you for having me. We already watched one Cats in a while. Theo actually sent me this one. He caught me. It's at the end of this video. My short stint as a server oh god damn

she caught uh this is good This is great Oh Oh Damn this hole is wild This is how people die in college Oh she threw it That doesn't look like Nick

He gave up He gave up Dang Nick And that's where Nick got laid off Short stint It looked like they tried to make a really cool video and just gave up. We're like, we're going to show all the mess up. That shit was dope.

Yeah, it started off really hot and then got weird. And let's focus in one more time on Nick losing his job at a Friday's. So what happens is one kind of tip. See there? Boop, boop, boop. He went, man. That was the final straw. That's Nick putting together that Patreon episode at the last minute.

Yeah, I was telling Nick was stressed. I was telling him, hey, bro, I'm dealing with a lot. Yeah, bro. Oh, God, man. Can't even imagine I sent that email. You got to show me that email, dude. I can't wait. Okay.

Another frat party? Yeah, I like that. Okay, who is this? There's Steven, what's his name, Randolph in the middle down there. This is King It or Sting It. Hey, Theo. Hey, Brandon. Got a King It or Sting It. Hey, Theo. Hey, Brandon. Got a King It or Sting It for you.

Themed birthday parties. It's my 25th birthday party. We're going to Toga Party. King It or Sting It. King It or Sting It. Oh, damn. That's hard. I like that.

See, now, first of all, this kind of stuff needs to happen more often, I think, with the chicks. I agree. I agree. Maybe we should bring them into the culture corner. Huh? Yeah. That looks fun. Bro, we're not bringing women into a corner at this time.

Well, it's called the culture corner. Right, but let's bring them into an open area. We'll make a cultural open area. That's fair. Sorry, but yeah, it it shouldn't we got to change culture couch culture couch that's the worst yeah that's worse and i think that name's taken on new porn you can't have the culture lounge boom culture lady friendly doesn't sound that's too you want

to come over to our lounge full of culture oh that sounds exotic that sounds nice it does actually yeah it's not a bad name for a comedy club the culture lounge

yeah pretty good the black club the CL yeah the CL I'm gonna king toga parties yeah hell yeah

now I'm sure everyone there what state is that in I'm sure everybody got Corona which isn't a big deal because they're young, but it could be fun. They did not say. I don't know. You're still worried about that email, huh?

Yeah. You think it's going to ruin your career? What are you thinking, man? I don't really have that much of a career, but. See, you got a haircut, huh? He cut it himself. He's his own barber I didn't do this one that well though

The other side is clean They're both pretty good Actually, yeah, it looks pretty good I'd let you cut my hair Can you do it? Oh, he got hair It'd be weird though I think it'd be weird

Me and Brendan talked about maybe cutting his hair But then actually imagining me cutting his hair Putting my hand on his head It was a little weird You know what I mean? Well, don't put your hand on his head Just cut it. You have to.

You have to. You're like a barber. You got to touch. Yeah, maybe wear a glove or wrap your hand in something. Can you deal with long hair? Can you deal with these? I do all hair.

I could do even Malik's hair. Well, hold on now. What do you mean even? What are you talking about? Hair from the Bible? I could do Ari's hair. Hair is a little curly. Malik's?

Oh, that's crazy. You guys do have similar hair, huh? Yeah, we both have bros. I that's crazy. You guys do have similar hair, huh? Yeah, we both have froze. I'm half white. You guys are Bible guys. No, Creole. Creole is like white, right? I don't know.

I don't even know what that is. It's like dirty rice kind of. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You guys are like Bible from the Bible, right? Ari and Malik? Yeah. Oh, that is very biblical names. I don't know where my name comes from.

Ari means lion. It means lion in Hebrew. Lion about what? Anything. I'll say this. Lion about the safety of his van. Lion to girls on Instagram. Bro, Ari one time.

Ari brought this lady to the comedy store. Sorry, man. There's a little more room. Oh, Ari brought this lady to the comedy store. Sorry, man. There's a little more room under this. Oh, what is this about to be? There's a little more room under this bus. Yeah, there's more room. Yeah, we can fit a couple more. Remember that girl you brought to the comedy store that the cops came and picked her up?

You heard about that? What do you mean? Yeah, I think you made a whole video about it. The cops came and picked the girl up? Well, so I was talking to this girl on the internet, like I do. Oh, like I do from time to time. Like we all do. Let's be real here.

Oh, yeah. Like everyone here does. We've all gotten in trouble for it. She's not underage. I like where this story's going. So she met me at the commis or patio for a glass of wine. And then when she gets there, she explains to me that she is a lady of the night. She's a pro.

She's a pro. And I didn't realize that. And you had no idea. No idea. And she was also very drunk when she got there. Okay. She started trying to make out with me. Hell yeah.

As well as some other comedians that were on the patio. Fantastic. She was just a very social young lady. She was social butterfly. Yeah. She was lovely. Nice. Kind.

So I decided to go hide in the kitchen in the back and stay away from this person. Because it scared you. Because I didn't want to be associated with it, but I also didn't have the courage to kick her out. Did you make out with her at all? Yes. I can't remember.

I can't remember. Yeah, that's fair. Wow. So I went to the kitchen, and then as I'm in the kitchen, she proceeds to cause a bigger scene And get more drunk On the patio Curtis the security guard comes

Tackles her She calls him the n-word and bites him Cops come And he's white He's white yeah yeah So Wow I don't use the n-word but if I do

I know where to use it And she was white. She does, too. She was white, too. It's out of her mind. She was white. So the cops come, and as the cops are arresting her in a hand cover, she goes, where's Ari? Ari.

Where's Ari? I'm here with Ari. And I'm just hiding in the kitchen. I don't know what that lady, I don't know who that is. Meanwhile, five other Aris who are attorneys in Los Angeles that happened to be on the porch showed up and came her their business card. And, yeah, I had to make an apology video to the Comedy Store staff and a few others. I'm sure people forget.

Do we have that video? Oh, please do. The video is pretty good. You still have it, right? Somewhere, yeah. Was she an attractive young lady? Yeah, she was cute. Weird.

She was cute and she was dang. And I hope she's doing better. I hope that she got her alcoholism under check, and I wish her nothing but the best. And probably don't drop the N-bomb, you know? Yeah. Yeah, I hope she's less racist now as well. Have you heard the N-word less as you've gotten older in your life,

do you feel like, or did you hear it much growing up, really? No, I listen to rap, so I hear it every day. But no, I never had somebody like a different race call me they're worried to my face never never I think I'm like one. Are you ready? We don't edit on this show. I'll watch him do it, but I'm not going to support him. Me neither.

I'll tell you this, bro. If you do say it, it's not going to end well for you. I'm going to go viral. I don't say that anymore, dude. Not anymore. Not anymore. Nah. Nobody really.

I don't know. Nah. Nobody called me to end work. But I hear hear i watch these videos like sean king i go in there and i just see like a different person say i'm like where are they at i'm looking for them yeah i just want to talk to them a little bit yeah getting there getting inside their mind a little bit like yo what it what n-word and i'm like yeah yeah yeah i don't i guess yeah i i i think. I think you don't see as much of it anymore. You got to really go almost looking for it, I feel like. You know?

And I grew up in the South, so. Yeah. Yeah. At least, like, every day you should be, like, at least get called on the way to school. But nobody never really did that to me. Not one. Not one. That's what I'm saying.

What about even in the gym? The boxing gym? Never. Never. Like, even in box because i box nobody ever said damn well that yeah people if you box people definitely aren't going to call you it well they didn't know i boxed but even even oh yeah even well i i seen somebody the different race like getting to it in floyd mayweather's gym and he was getting beat up it's like a lot of black people

i think he was like a like a ukrainian a guy and he was getting everybody was just plant laughing i'm getting beat up he was like man F all you N words and then double down and then I thought like it was about to pop off and the dude was about

to get beat up again I slept he just walked out the gym I was like oh yeah that's me I was preparing for Mike Tyson

I'm trying to fight him who is that guy and who's that tall drink of water tall drink of whiter who is that dude that's Johnny Mitchell that's the

what's he do besides not box he looks terrified dude he's like he's he has a bunch of sugar in his it threw me off because i didn't want to buy some he don't have any drawers on like he just has basketball shorts i'm yo, come on. He took his shirt off. He really wanted to do it. But who is it? He fights like a kangaroo, I feel like. He's a tall comedian. Wow, he fights like a kangaroo.

And is he Australian? No, he's from Boston or something. I have so many questions. The chest hair. Yeah, yeah. Who instigated this? Well, me. Oh, there he is right there with a gun in his mouth.

Yeah, that's what my friends i hang around and i'm looking for inward that's your boy yes my boy nice guy blow his head off there that's crazy man blowing your own head off all the guns out there you think you'd let somebody else do it you know it's really it's really ineffective too people mess it up all the guns out there, you'd think you'd let somebody else do it, you know? It's really ineffective, too. People mess it up all the time. You miss your jaw. Yep.

And then they bring you back to life, and then you're all deformed, but you're still living. You're still sad. Who's this gentleman? What up, Brendan? What up, Theo? What's up? This is Robert coming at you. A few thousand feet underground in this gold mine.

Shout out to my hard hat hitters. got a king of stinging for you jewelry gold jewelry talking about necklaces bracelets watches rings don't have a gold one got this rubber one so i don't get my finger ripped off rubber one so i don't get my finger ripped off but uh can't get her sting it gold jewelry gang gang bling bling and wristlets too you forgot wristlets other type of jewelry neck uh nose piercing never thought about piercing that sucker dude i might hang a spare key off the front of my house if i if i did i would hang it probably a spare key because i always lose my key i gotta get a key chain no i'm gonna king jewelry i'll have to say i wear jewelry really hell yeah i love it love it never had any pairs you know you've had you look like the dude that had both ears pierced oh yeah i have but i do have them both ears pierced yep yep but only because it's

awesome spring break yeah only because it's awesome. Because of spring break. Yeah. Only because it's spring break forever in part of my brain. Dude, we had this kid named Billy, and he was an alcoholic. He might still be if he's still alive. But he – and this kid named – not Billy Conforto, my friend that died. This is a different guy. And he, on spring break, broke – broke um he like broke his arm through a window

or something and then he got arrested and so we had to bail him out so we sold all of the stuff he brought to spring break we sold it out on like the strip and did you make i mean what do you have that people wanted to buy like your swim trunks and shit yeah clothes he had a mask he had a couple just not that much um why do you have a mask. He had a couple, just not that much. Why do you have a mask before COVID? He had a swimming water mask. Water doesn't hit your face. Hits your eyes.

Oh, like he was going to snorkeling. Yeah. Smart. But he didn't. Yeah, we didn't make enough. We made like $70 and we spent it on beer and he stayed in jail for like a week. Then he gets out and he's like, you sold all my shit. My bad we're trying to help but then but yeah you got i mean yeah but we had a plan i remember the beginning of that day we had this big plan we're gonna sell

his stuff we're gonna get him out of jail and then by the end of the day uh one of our girlfriends ended up banging that guy tone loke because he was there performing oh oh gee oh gee what was his main song what were you uh he had that deep voice right yeah oh then uh uh i just remember from poetic justice no but tone loke's also in fern gully there he is he's the lizard in fern gully you said uh one and he's also in uh baby kids oh that's a good movie yeah yeah he wasn't you said one of our girlfriends. Which one of your girlfriends? Tell them, look. One of our girlfriends.

I don't want to say her. Oh, Wild Thing. Yeah, Wild Thing. Wild Thing. Yeah, yeah. Wild Thing. Wild Thing. Dude, Wild Thing has had more busted people having sex to it than anything else in the world.

Wild Thing. Oh, more tragic humans have fucking banged a wild dude you've never seen him rap as a lizard and cold medina yeah that was it he was bad man it's all the lizard and fringling i'm going to hell rap dude i just love his voice man yeah one thing led to another yeah oh dude check out this lizard dropping fucking bars what's fern gully dude it's awesome avatar stole the reminds me of the jackets i have going on right now that's for sure wow as a kid i used to love this. He's beautiful. Praise God. Look at that fat ass lizard.

Big boy lizard. Mm-hmm. You never seen Ferngully, dog? It's the story of Avatar. Avatar stole their idea. They stopped Ferngully. Really? Yeah.

I read the book. I feel like, can I wear these? Hell yeah. You're probably cooler than them. God damn. Yeah, you look like a wrestler, man. You look like you're about to just dive off the top row

of Swanton. You look like you're about to do a TED Talk on Rice Krispie Treats. That feels more accurate. That feels way more active Like wrestling sounds Heck Oh, rice cream

Talking for one hour I was like, what's happening? What's happening? On those beautiful edible rectangles Sorry, man. That came straight out of Asia? No, dude. I like that.

What else you got, Nick? Those are dope, dude. Am I the only one who fucked with Ferngully? I'm the only one, huh? I don't remember. I was a little kid. I don't remember. Nick knows what's up.

Dude, also, Nick's pics. He's been killing it for your boy on the pics. Me and him before every fight. I'm not using Nick's pics anymore. I put them on. You should, though. He's got 70%. But when you and I did use his picks, we lost a lot of money.

Last two UFC cards, 7-0-1. And the draw was a plus 250 underdog. He's part of my show now. I beat Nick's picks and give it to these little fuckers. Give him the picks. I just want people to know that if you tail me, tail at your own risk. I don't want shitty DMs. I watch every fight. I'm a degener shitty DMs. I watch every fight.

I'm a degenerate gambler. I think I have kind of an eye for it. No, I told them. Yeah. I told them. I told them. I told them. I told them.

No, they know what they're saying. Yeah, yeah. I told them to drop out of college to gamble. There's nothing sanctioned to go with it. No, this is nothing official. Well, people use a picker because I think sometimes it's better than having to make your own choice almost. But Nick, and I'll give him the credit,

he looks into the undercard and all that shit where I just go through the main card shit. I have my picks on the main card, but that's it. You always ask me about my thoughts on the main event betting. Betting is a bad idea. Vegas just knows those lines. DC, Stipe, it's minus 115 each side. It's a pick-em. Yeah, you're gonna lose

money. You're guessing. It's a coin flip. Don't send Nick mean DMs. Now, Ari, do you wrestle in high school? Absolutely not. My parents wouldn't even let me do that if I wanted to. I played baseball and a little tennis. A little tennis, dude.

I wasn't good enough to make the team. Basically, you sound like somebody that got molested, bro. A little tennis until Gary got a little too handsy. I played a little tennis. One day in short shorts and no more tennis for Ari. You don't look like Hunter Guest Thompson, bro. Like, I don't know shit, dude. You look dope, man.

Thanks, man. They look better on you, I think. Really? Yeah. Let me see you put them back on. I think you're underselling yourself, man, or overselling yourself. Yeah, they probably do look better on me. Oh, here's you, dude.

I was just about to say, you look like him. Damn, that's what I look like? Hey, Brandon. Hey, Theo. What do you think of bears fucking in your backyard? It's your own National Geographic shit. Gang, gang. Bear fucks.

Oh, shit. He has two black bears doing black saying. And look at that. Oh. What a cool backyard. That's a gift. And if you see a black animal, do you relate differently to a black animal since you have a darker skin? Yeah, I kind of root for them.

Yeah, I feel that. Yeah, it's like family feud when they're like. It's like family feud. It's like family feud. You always side with one family. You always do. It's a great reference. You always do, man. Damn, the gift of black beers in your backyard man and doing sex

too man my buddy's dog used to do sex with every dog and we would take it down to the park and just watch it just that sounds like a nice day oh we'd be on there for an hour ones yeah people would come in with their dogs thinking that he he wasn't going to try to bang it, and this dog would go right up. And then that pink rocket comes out. Every time, man. Pink rocket. I mean it.

Flash rocket. Oh, we're about to see it. Apollo skirt teen, dude. This thing was hunting leg, dog. The dog's just watching it. Oh, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. That dog is a freak.

That dog is a freak. I love you got just got in position yeah yeah trying to look uh right there he's like oh i just had a shower he just cleaned me yeah that dog's trying to look dang delectable bro what else you got, Nick? What do you want? What do you want? Relationship advice? Yeah, what do you want us to do, Nick?

Oh, yeah. We would love some more relationship advices. Send in videos of your aunt if you do a flaunt my aunt. Videos of your clown my hounds. We have a couple of clown my hounds. But, yeah, always send in videos, not just images. We're not going to read what you say. I'll tell you what I can't stop listening to,

that little Browse fucking King of the Sting rap he did. That shit was fire. What you just posted? That was hard. On that what's popping? He floated. He floated, yeah. Yeah, he floated.

He floated, yeah. Yeah, he's a real animal. He's a real animal. What's this little hound doing? And there's Drake right there. Is she going to fire up a question? I mean, it's just clown my hound. She's got some information on him.

A little short, thick hound there, man. Oh, yeah. We can adopt that. We got that short, thick hound there, man. Oh, yeah. We can adopt that thing? You got that short, fat dog. That's that little milkshake. She was just showing that he rolls down the window, but she said some asshole dumped her in the country and she found her on the streets.

It's a Beagle Lab Basset Hound mix that's 13 years old and smarter than most kids. All right, well, your award's in the mail, lady. What do you want us to do? It's kind of like Drake career a little bit. Yeah. So the animal's been through a tough time. And she picked him up.

Well, that's easy, though. Yeah, he seems like a cool-ass hound just chilling in the car. Yeah, it seemed like he's doing fine. What happened to him? He can roll down the window. He's evidently really smart. Well, here's the thing. He's overweight.

First of all, why he's missing was his own freaking fault, obviously. He's that smart. He's able to roll down the window, dude. Somebody didn't lose him. He freaking escaped, obviously. Yep. Damn, so really, he wants to leave, lady, I think is what's going on. So this is a video of a failed kidnapping, it sounds like.

Or a successful one. We're like first 48. We're like the first four. Yeah, that's fair. I hate the first 48. You hate it? Why? It's always in New Orleans?

Yeah. No, wait. It's in Memphis, first of all. Yeah, I was about to say. Memphis and Oklahoma a lot. And Miami. A lot of Oklahoma. Used to be Miami.

Tulsa. Yeah, there's a lot of snitching. Yeah, I knew as soon as the guy. That's the only way they can have a show. All they have to do is just say, I want to talk to be Miami. Tulsa. Yeah, there's a lot of snitching. Yeah, I knew as soon as the guy- That's the only way they can have a show. All they have to do is just say, I want to talk to my lawyer. As soon as the guy put his arms in his t-shirt, I'm like, oh, he about to snitch. And they bring him back to the culture. Well, they got there all day, but you realize cops can't do shit unless people snitch.

Yeah. All they do is try to get people to snitch. Man. They have no evidence, nothing. I just got a little Ronnie to snitch. I'm like, haven't you seen the first four days? Thank you. That's all I want.

Like, bro, just shut up. And then they just get them in and they reel them in. And next thing you know, they're like, man, listen, I wasn't driving the car. And it always starts off like that. And then they got them. And they just walk around and celebrate. And they got them at 48 hours. Yeah.

Another brother gone. Damn, yeah. What was Chris's joke on first 48? Oh, yeah. Talia has the best joke he said. So funny. The show is about how police have the first 48 hours to solve a crime, but really they have as much time as they want.

It's never 48 hours. It's never 48 hours. It'll be like six months later. What the fuck? Dude, I think of that joke twice a week. That joke pops in my head. How funny it is. Me too.

So ridiculous. Here's a guy right now who gave up on his dreams to have a child. Look at that kid. Looks like Amy Schumer. It does. Damn, dude. It does. It does look like Amy Schumer.

Yeah. It looks like Amy Schumer. Yeah, like it's about to snitch on a fellow comedian for something it didn't do. She must have a lot of room under her bus. You do not want to be friends with her because it's coming, man. Yo, look at this. That baby definitely. Well, they look identical.

Wow. I'm Brandon. It's Matthew from Canton, Georgia. Well, they look identical. I'm Brandon. It's Matthew from Canton, Georgia. What's up, man? And me and my girl have a debate club. We were just watching you guys. So the Power Rangers team or the Captain Planet team.

Captain Planet has them hearts so our money's on uh the captain planet team but uh what do you guys think gang gang buzz buzz oh dude you look like captain planet but the power rangers went hard in the pain thank you when i was a kid it was all day power rangers mighty morphous now it gets little, the new Power Rangers are a little weak. They're all politically correct. Half of them are women. They made the Black Ranger not black anymore. No way. Because that was racist.

They made the Yellow Ranger not Asian. I guess. The Black Ranger is blue now. He blue. He's blue? Yeah, he's blue. Yeah. It's on the edge.

Both of those suck how about that my kid's not into that gay shit bro yeah yeah so sting them both in that debate club what did uh what did the guy want to know what was his wrong with them what do you what was better as a kid power rangers or captain i never got into captain i never got there's always an agenda yeah plan even as a kid i was like what are they trying to sell me on dog i'm good yeah it always litter come on yeah it always felt like it was about litters or like saving a rainforest or some kind of shit or the planet yeah i was trying to ability yeah i'm trying to dude it's saturday morning i'm trying to eat my cereal i'm trying to dude it's Saturday morning my cereal I'm trying to watch Ren and Stimpy Animania I'm trying to kill time till I hit

puberty and I'm down to fuck you know this captain planet ain't helping this boner y'all you feel me yeah dude oh there you go that shit's dope half Dio half captain planet that's kinda more that's kinda more body. I think the body is me. What's the yellow thing? What's the yellow thing in his chest? A planet. Oh.

What planet? Captain Planet. That's a good point. Yeah. I don't know what yellow planet. But thanks for sending in him, man. That's a beautiful child you got there, fella. Yeah, super cute kid.

Whoa, you found us. Oh. The boys. We on Patreon now. Yeah. king and the sting king this sting that man we're here on patreon so welcome to the patreon and this is you know extra if somebody wants extra then you this is it are you jonesing for more king of the sting well you found it and we got three options for you yep we got the lightning and the honey right here. They got Touch Me, Don't Touch Me, Keep Touching Me.

Meet Me at 20. Meet Me at 20, baby. They got three tiers. You can check them out and see whatever fits for you. And that's it. Bonus episodes. Yeah. No commercial ads for regular episodes.

We got merch offers. We got 360 camera. You're up for that head-on-a-sw got 360 camera you up for that that head on a swivel appeal you know that lazy susan that owl view yeah you get that oh that's the owl view that's al erotic bro um but yeah there's something for you if you want it and so no obligation but here it is and thank you for supporting uh king and Sting. Enjoy. What's up, Theo, Brennan, and gang? I got you all playing right here. Got a debate club for you, all right?

Would you rather be short, like really short, or freakishly tall? I'm talking freakishly tall. Now, mind you, you might think, okay, tall, obviously, right? I'm 6'9", so I know what comes with that. You can't find shoes can't find clothes can't go on airplanes traveling sucks so let me know what y'all think gang gang buzz buzz praise god brother praise god praise god ptl baby hell yeah jesus christ ari you came in hot with this one what do you think man oh tall all day you can't find shoes that fit go to a store go

to the internet that's easy no you can't find shoes that fit go to a store go to the internet that's easy no you can't find anything cool though like you like you hold up any any designer shoe the max limit's usually like 15 you know you want to know what's cool getting laid is cool really short guys like all you don't get laid it's all he cares about is getting laid but here's the other thing it's a big portion of what i drive any cool cars name a cool car you ain't fitting in suvs you gotta have suvs this guy's putting carpet into the walls of a van right now It's a big portion of what I care about. You can't drive any cool cars. Name a cool car. You ain't fitting in it. SUVs. You gotta drive SUVs. This guy's putting carpet into the walls of a van right now. Okay?

I just don't think. That's a good point. I'm saying when he's older, more success. Yeah, you're right, man. Get an SUV. Get a pickup truck. You can't drive a. Again, cool car.

What about the airplane? Ferraris, Lambos, Porsches, McLarens, Bugattas. Sacrifice I'm willing to make. Wait, here's the thing. And then the airport. Thank you. That's what I'm saying. First class.

You're fucking everything Southwest when you're 6'9". Come on, man. And he got a great voice. So were y'all saying little or big? I don't know what y'all are saying. I'm saying. You're saying little. Little sucks too.

Little sucks too. No chick digs a real short guy. No chick digs a short guy. Tom Cruise is short. What about that guy with no legs who shot his wife to death? Who's that? I didn't hear about that. Batara or whatever? Yeah, in Australia. Remember that guy? He was a champion runner wife to death? Who's that? I didn't hear about that. Batara or whatever?

Yeah, in Australia. Remember that guy? He was a champion runner. Olympic runner. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Blade runner. Blade runner. Try playing sports when you're really short.

Not fun. Lacrosse. UFC. Yeah. 155 and under. You killing it. One sport. Jockey.

Soccer. Okay, you win. Jockey. Yeah. Everyone wants to be a jockey. Yeah. Jockey Soccer Okay you win Jockey Yeah Everyone wants to be a jockey Yeah There's not really I mean there's a short

Baseball player What's his name A Tuve The guy who just Went for Houston Yeah yeah yeah I mean cheater But yeah

Yeah but he won MVP And he's short But if you're tall A you're gonna get more ladies Probably gonna have a bigger Ding dong Let's be real But here's the thing

Imagine you show up With that little baby Jingle bell And you're going to get more ladies. Probably going to have a bigger ding dong, let's be real. But here's the thing. Imagine you show up with that little baby jingle bell and you're 6'5". Baby jingle bell? You mean like Shaq? Huh? Shaq has a tater tot. It's well known. But I don't know. I've heard that Shaq has a real heat stick on him. No, that's not true. Really? You heard he has a tiny? First of all, I didn't hear that. Neither one of us know and that's

good. So I'm not going to sit here. You're dropping some facts today. I'm just not going to argue argue about i don't want ever us to look back our children look back and oh here's my dad and another dad's lying arguing about how big a man's penis is when you're right you're right look at two bay look little small he is though yeah but here's anything but i'm saying if you're real tall and you got that little baby jingle bell dog that thing thing is going to- Disappoint some ladies.

Even just grabbing it with your hand, trying to get it, like trying to get a grape out of a big dish. Yeah, exactly. Think how big your fucking meat beaters are. Yeah. You're big old dick beaters. You reach down there, you got that little tater tot. Oh, like trying to pick a butterscotch out of a dang garbage bag, bro.

You guys are all tall. It's easy for you to say the cons of being tall. You all got it. I'm not tall. You're 6'1". I'm 6'1". 6'1", that's pretty good. I'm lucky to be 6'1". You're a all tall. It's easy for you to say the cons of being tall. You all got it. I'm not tall. You're 6'1". I'm 6'1". I'm lucky to be 6'1". You're a good size.

I'm getting shorter. You're a good size. My arms aren't that long. Look how 5'9". I used to be average. Now I'm below average. The new average is 5'10". Tom Cruise is 5'9".

I think he's even less. He's like 5'6". Every rapper is like 5'9". Yeah, I'm 5'9". Anyway, so that's... And they get laid a lot. So I'd rather be short. Every rapper... But 5 five nine isn't short sure when he said really short that's five four five six real short would be five the baby the baby is five two wow three he's a rich rapper

i'm saying and grand scheme like what are what are we talking about if you're yeah if you're out exactly dude five two how tall go on grinder good luck exactly if you're an accountant what height do you want to be if you're a accountant, what height do you want to be? If you're a plumber, what height are you? Not if you're a famous comedian. Do you want to go to the bank telling me 6'9"? What a terrible decision. Wayne is 5'5".

Look at that. That's crazy, bro. Look at that, man. Little Wayne is 5'5". Kendrick Lamar, 5'6". And you got to stand, yeah, Peter Dinklage, 4'. Eminem, 5'8". Bro. Eminem, 5'6". And you got to stand, yeah, Peter Dinklage, 4'0". Eminem 5'8", bro. Eminem 5'8".

Yeah. I didn't realize. I didn't know that. I didn't know he was taller than that. I meant some good company. Kanye is 5'8", as well? Louisiana had some height. How tall is Silk the Shocker?

Oh, he's 6'0". Oh, Master P was tall, too. He played basketball. Kanye West, 5'8". Yeah, they played basketball. You're talking about athletes now. Now we're talking about 6'4", Silk the Shocker. Yeah.

Yeah. Now he died now. Silk the Shocker died. If you're short, you live longer. No, he didn't die. He didn't die. That's true, too. Yeah, Silk the Shocker's dead.

Wait, wait. Or is it C-Murder? No, C-Murder's in jail. He's in jail. Or is it Mystical? Mystical is alive. They're all alive, Brendan. All my heroes are still alive, Brendan.

Those are your heroes? Yeah. If you're yeah my partners in crime they might I think some of those guys are dead Mystical

Mystical only 511 though yeah Mystical 50 have you watched the No Limit documentary nah

I heard it's good though but I'm kind of sad on it No Limit they were talking about their height bro

this is a tall batch of fellas right there not like these other short ass rappers from other places how tall is Paul Wall?

I'm going to say 5'7". He seems pretty tall. Paul Wall? No. The Brad is little. Paul Wall is 6'0". Damn, Slim Thug, 6'6". Here's the thing, though.

If you've got a small height, if you've got a small height, then you have more. Chip on your shoulder? I think you might have more drive. You might have a little more combustion in you. I'm with you. That's what I'm saying. I agree with you.

Because if you're stretched out, you're long, you might be more like, oh, everything's. Life is easy. Chicks coming your way. And chicks. And dude, also, my grandfather, there I am last night, actually, with a yellow wolf. Yellow wolf. He's tall. Yellow wolf.

That was last night? Yeah. What were you guys doing? In Gangsta Boo right there. I like Yellow Wolf. Yellow Wolf, he's great. And that lady was in Three Six Mafia, too. Da Brad?

Gangsta Boo. Gangsta Boo. That's not Da Brad? No, that's... Uh- Da Brat? Gangsta Boo. That's not Da Brat? Nah, that's... Uh-uh. Damn, Gangsta Boo. Juicy J in 3... Gangsta Boo.

I was in a Juicy J music video once. He was in Juicy J. And who else were they talking to on the phone? That was pretty fun. Yellow, I saw a six foot. He looks taller than that. Booger Chucky or something. Some man named Booger Chucky.

But anyway, what were we saying? we're talking about small and height like you say you small guys booger chucky dude first of all you had a concert huh no they were in the studio i just went to hang out for a little while word booger chucky is the craziest name, I feel like. Doesn't sound real. Dude, everybody had that kid in class, though, who was a straight boogerchucky, dude, who would pick his nose and look like he was going to kill people later on in life, bro.

We had one kid. I swear, this boy named Michael, bro. He always had one finger in his nose and one eye on your freaking heart. A little booger chucker. What the hell? You call him a booger chucker? Booger chucker? Booger Chucky, bro, because Chucky's a little killer. Think about that.

Chucky was a killer. How tall is Chucky? Look it up. Red hair. He had that dry. He's like 2'6", I think. But let's see. They did a new one. I heard some bullshit. Chuckie doll height, 29 inches, dude. 2'5", I was one inch off.

I know your height. Hey, bro, and I bet $600 on it, so I'm fucking pissed. I bet you over on that Booger Chuckie height. Dude, you telling me little can't be badass? Little Chuckie's little ass. 29 inches of straight motherfucking silverware murder boy. Okay? Yeah.

So y'all need to get it right, all of you out here. And look, if you're tall, you can't be a fucking murderer. You can't sneak around. It's too easy. Yeah, I agree. Hide and seek. You're busted. You ain't doing shit.

Everywhere you go, you got to do like this to make sure you don't hit a fucking shitty light at somebody's house. People always ask you to grab things for them. People meeting up at you at the fairgrounds. People, oh, let's meet over there by Randall. Your dick's in everybody's face all the time, like a microphone. Yeah, you got to put deodorant on the side of your nuts because of where your nuts are in space to people's heads. I never did.

Stuff you got to think about, man. Dude, you got to think more. Little you show up, nobody gives a fuck anyway, bro. Still want to be tall, Ari, after all that? got to think about, man. Dude, you got to think more. Little, you show up, nobody gives a fuck anyway, bro. You still want to be tall, Ari, after all that? Absolutely. Come on, man. I never did those things. I don't know what height you do that.

Imagine only being able to have 11 people in your church. Dude, if you're tall, you could be a hero. You could save people out of trees and stuff. I've always wanted to be a hero. Who's a little hero, Chen? Well, your whole culture. That's true. I mean, before me, the people before me, but not anymore. Now we're getting real tall. You're that game breaker, bro.

Yeah. I am literally out of my whole family. You're the tallest Asian I've ever seen. Thank you. Appreciate it. You're the tallest Asian. I actually knew a guy. This was on a ship, though. You're the tallest Asian on land that I know. That's fair. In person? Was there a cruise ship deal? land Asian yeah

this was a cruise ship I mean you're the Dikembe Mutombo of Koreans but they're getting taller than me now so I was like the threshold breaking point and now they're just like getting super tall that's why you have to have kids

now that they're taller not really I'll be fine who's a little killer right there? Frodo Baggins right there. Danny DeVito, 5'4". Genghis Khan was 5'1". Look at Prince, man.

Genghis Khan, you mean people he killed? People were shorter back then, I think. Yeah. Didn't Mugsy Bogues shoot somebody one time? He's 5'3". No, that was Marvin Harrison killed somebody at a car wash. You're right. Yeah, sure did. By, yeah, so it did.

And then still played the following Sunday. No, Picasso was 5'4". Dude, Michael J. Fox. Back to the Future, 5'4". I didn't know Kevin Hart was that little. Look at Seth Green's little ass.

Woody Allen little touching my children's ass. Harry Potter is only 5'5"? You're right, Sabre. Bruno Mars. A lot of little hoes. Damn, Jack Black's only 5'6". Look at all the talent in short people, man. Aziz, 5'6".

A lot of people trying to prove themselves. Damn, Jon Stewart, 5'6". Yeah, we're going to hell, man. Our tall asses, brother. Oh, Jet Li. Jet Li. Martin Luther King Jr., we're not even to your height yet. He's only 5'7".

Robin Williams, 5'7". Not anymore, but you know what I'm saying. Tom's only 5'7". Robin Williams, 5'7". Not anymore, but you know what I'm saying. Tom Cruise. Oh, you said Tom Cruise is 5'7", yeah? Al Pacino. Spud Webb, dunk contest. Manny Pacquiao.

Yeah, and how tall are you? Are you 5'9"? 5'9". I'm good. I'm feeling good. This is making me feel really good. Yeah. Yeah, that's why we brought you here.

Carlos Slim. They didn't even include 5'9". I'm a tall guy. Yeah. i'm one of you five nines average they call you stretch on this list what else you got nick that's it damn how long was this episode hour five hour eight just got started i know that's what we do doug nice change of pace after we freaking kicked it through the after we just punted the whole fucking show on that British. We didn't know anything. I felt like such an idiot.

I was listening to that trying to get a feel for what you guys do. You watched the British one? You've never seen the show? Yeah, this is my first time. I wanted to... I spent enough time with you guys where I don't want to listen to you in my free time. That's fair. I wouldn't listen to it either. I watched that shit.

Dude, we got to the part in that episode where about British comedians, we knew three people. If that. I felt like it. They had to bring it up. Yeah, I cheated on Russell Howard. I showed it to him.

You weren't looking. I feel like such an idiot. How do you think I feel? My family's from there. I brought nothing to the table. I just kept saying fish and chips the entire time. Yeah, that was bad. Yeah, my mom was not happy my mom was not happy that was bad yeah i just can't believe we don't know anything more about other places dude we're idiot idiot we're idiot we're idiot

just gotta get better. And I knew, well, honestly, man, I knew. This is going to sound messed up, but. You going to throw me under the bus? You got more room under there? Let me see. Oh, yeah, we do have a little more room. I knew that you weren't, you know, the real cat's meow of the library kind of.

But I didn't know that I was that dumb. Oh, you did it? I'm glad we did it then yeah yeah because i knew appreciate that bro that's why we're partners yep part life partners yeah sure man whatever whatever you call it i got you a present for having me on oh really yeah for your kids oh thanks, thanks, man. Oh, yeah. I almost read this book once. Oh, damn.

That's cool, man. I already wrote it. It's a safe book for the kids? Yeah, it's a children's book. How old are they? The one who can read is a four and a half. Perfect. They're going to love it.

Hell yeah. Thanks, dude. There's nothing creepy in there? Do you have a bunch of these in your van? Yeah, I got a lot of those. I keep them in the van. I keep everything I own in the van. Yeah, it is warm's nothing creepy in there. Now, do you have a bunch of these in your van? Yeah, I got a lot of them. I keep them in the van. I keep everything I own in the van. Yeah, it is warm. It is super warm.

Ari's warm books. Bears don't like candy. That's what it's called. Yeah, yeah. Four and a half stars. Yeah, I got a few haters. I actually got a lot of haters. But yeah, it's just a book for kids.

I read this book. Yeah, there's some few haters. I actually got a lot of haters. But yeah, it's just a book for kids. I read this book. Yeah, there's some grammatical errors. I'm coming out with a sequel, actually, that no one wanted. But yeah, it's just a book for kids and age, I'd say, zero to four. Thanks, man. I hope they like it. We'll read it tonight, and I'll report back. Malik, where can people check you out?

Oh, I bought a gift before. I bought a gift, I bought a gift too You know miles from the live factory yeah Is it a gift or he's trying to show off no no he literally told me to just show just give it to him. Yeah, it's a little. Oh, damn. It's a bunch of warm gifts today. It's a little warm gift. Yeah. Damn. I wanted to wear it. Wow. I don't know how we start hell with the hands, but I don't know what this is.

I just saw it. How you find me? Dude, I'm going to go in with this thing. Yeah, there it is. It's getting real. All right. All right.

There you go. You've been working out. You're looking good. I kept it warm for you. I kept it warm for you. Not for lighting, man. That's what I'm saying, bro. Stay even, bro.

I'm at the hairy chest, dog. Huh? You got the Kanye West body as well. Don't look at me, Brennan. I'm changing. Yeah, you are changing. You have good-sized nipples for your body. Thanks, dude.

A little far apart, though, yeah? A little bit. A little too East-West. Oh, yeah, you feel it in, right. Yeah. Staying, bro. Staying, bro. Yeah.

Ooh, yeah. How'd it feel? Ooh, bro. Yeah. The under Stay, bro. Stay, bro. Yeah. Ooh, yeah. How'd it feel? Ooh, bro. Yeah. The underarms is wet. There's no air conditioning. I'm hot. It is warm in here.

It is warm. What you want? It's four. Bro, it's four dudes in here. And the front is real tight. It is tight. I got a chest. I got a chest.

I've been training. That book is wet as well, man. I was keeping it under me in my bag. The book was warm and wet. Your shirt's warm and wet. This really is culture because it's a hot. I appreciate the gifts, fellas. This goes to show you everyone sweats.

Black people, Jewish people, we all got it. You see how everybody brought it together? Yeah, we brought it back together. That's what I'm saying, man. Teamwork, man. We wear each other. It is cold under each arm. I got secret deodorant, so I'm good. Yeah man we wear each other it is cold under each arm I got secret deodorant so I'm good

yeah you good that's what I'm saying bro that shit's dope hey man I'm honored to wear the shirt off of my brother's back thanks for coming in fellas

thank you so much thank you guys for coming in Thank you. We'll be right back. We Diaz, meaning y'all edible Just got my eyebrows threaded and I'm feeling Incredible, Brennan's son hit me up He said it's too loud in the club, can you pick me up? King and the sting King and the sting King and the sting Bee sting, rat king King and the sting

King and the sting Got the bees in a trap Got the cheese on a string King and the sting King and string. King in the sting, king in the sting, king in the sting, bee sting rat king. King in the sting, king in the sting, got the bees in a trap, got the cheese on a string. Bye.