The Golden Hour - Episode 99: Bro-Tox

Episode Date: December 11, 2020

The guys welcome in comedian Gabby Lamb into the Culture Corner and talk Lip Injections, BJ's on Pizzas, Elf On A Shelf, TikTok Stars, Alcoholics Anonymous, Shapel's Hatred For Christmas, King Kong vs Jaws, All New Roast My Hosts, the King And The Sting Album Drop Date, upcoming Culture Corner Auditions and much more!Kats Merch - https://KATSmerch.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Phil pays this poor dude 40 bucks. Hold on. I said, how much for a full body? He goes, 40 for an hour, bro. 40 for an hour. Bro, it's 40 for an hour. I will tell you, this is how the guy finishes. He stands in front of you, right?

And he will backflip and fucking land in the middle of your back. No, he does. Unbelievable. Yeah. It's $40. Tip 40. That's sex trafficking. I tip.

That's what. Dang, dang. That's what. Back off my broccolini. Get your life together. It is. Don't touch me, bro. I'm not touching you, dude. Vulture Corner is looking like a Vans convention. Look at you guys.

I didn't realize that. Did both you ride your skateboards here? I love Vans, man. Those are fire, girl. I like your socks, too. Yeah, thank you. Appreciate you coming in.

Oh, yeah. Thank you for having me. Well, why are you talking like that, I feel like? Talking like what? Huh? She just said she got it. Talking like what? Like you're talking like you're like that i feel like huh she just said like what like you're talking

like you're like you're you're don't collect uh you're don't collecting your lips while you're talking wait i just got them done so i'm getting used to them who did it hurt yeah it hurts it hurts real bad i've seen a girl get it done several times and it looks so fucking painful it's fucking awful and uh is this the first time you've done it yeah cuz that's the thing I'm done tell you what you're talking about you like injections both I mean like testosterone yeah it's lip fill and they use a little needle and some girls it doesn't stay everyone thinks they're like Kylie Jenner but they look more like fucking Keanu Reeves

Yeah, they try to get it done all the time. Yeah. Yeah. How do you know? I just know you're addicted you feel I'm addicted. Yeah, is that have you done anything else? No, that's it But that that dude, I'm Tony Nick video It looks like it looks like she gave a blowjob to a really hot piece of pizza. Wait, really? And I don't mean that in any... And I'm not assuming that you get blowjobs, honestly.

I know Chappelle is dressed like The Rock from all that famous Halloween costume. Chappelle looks like every character from Fresh Prince of Bel-Air and Wonder Woman. RIP Phil, bro. RIP Phil. last to him. Travelle looks like every character from Fresh Prince of Bel-Air in one right now. R.I.P. Phil, bro. R.I.P. Phil. No, but take us... Travelle looks like an extra out of Straight Outta Compton.

Yeah. Take us back to those floaties. At least if you ever were on a ship that went down, you could just like... They're heavy. No, they're heavy.

Are they really? These would sink me. Yeah, for sure. And this is, you said your third time doing it? Third time. When was the last time you did it? Last week. So they're brand new, which is why it said your third time doing it? Third time. When was the last time you did it? Last week.

So they're brand new, which is why it looks like I... Ooh. They look good. They look good. I think they look good. You don't think they look good. I think they look good. You're a hater, dog.

I know. You're telling me you couldn't use something on... You're telling me you couldn't use something on your upper lip, dog? A little bit. The upper, yeah. The bottom, you're good. Yeah, the bottom, you're good. You can use it.

Give me some of that bro i woke up the other day my bottom lip was wearing a thong dude i got my bottom lip from atlanta there you go baby bottom lip is liquid iv This thing's had some packets. This is actually ideal timing because for this episode, we're going to bring back Roast My Host. Gabby's got some of the best comments burning all of us in the room. All of us?

From YouTube, some Instagrams, some Ween Tweet-esque things. The good ones, the funny ones. The funny ones. No, this one, you were with Brendan. It's good. I'm here for that. Should I do them now? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You ready? Yeah, let's hear it. Get Theo's bitch ass because he just really roasted your lips. Yeah, he really fucking did. Yeah, he did. I made a suggestion about it.

You said it looks like she does blowjobs at Quiznos. Yeah, you did. Son of a bitch. No, first of all, you said pizza, not Quiznos. Yeah, hot pizza pizza. Quiznos was mine because they dish out hot subs. I said it looks like she does blowjobs at Quiznos. Yeah, you did. Son of a bitch. No, first of all, you said pizza, not Quiznos. Yeah, hot pizza. Quiznos was mine because they dish out hot subs.

I said it was a movie. I didn't. No. Blowjobs at Quiznos. But keep touching me. But what I'm saying is. I was trying to back you there. I threw my joke to that, dog. No, I said that it looked like she's been, her lips seem very activated.

They are. They are. Now, were they bruising before this? A little bit. They're a little bruised. It looks bad when you get it done. So can you eat or do you just kind of throw stuff over your lip? No, I can eat.

I can definitely eat. I can eat. Yeah, no, I can eat. Through the wire. For sure. Were your. I can just... I can eat. Yeah, no, I can eat. Through the wire. For sure. Were your lips real thin before? They were fine. They were fine.

The woman who injected them was like, these are thin. And I was like, I get it. I get it. That's why I'm here, Donna. That's why I'm here.

Yeah, I feel like those are the lips that they remind you if you're going on a swimming field trip to bring to summer camp with you in the morning. You know?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Thank you. But no, yeah, yeah. Thank you. But no, you look lovely. Thank you. Let's find out more about our new guest in the Culture Corner. What's up, girl?

Yeah, hey. We know Chabelle. Do you want me to roast? Should I roast him first? No, no. We'll go to that after this. Okay, got it. Let people get to know.

You're a comic. You're a local comic in LA. Yeah. But you're from San Diego? San Diego. San Diego wins. Oceanside. And you But you're from San Diego? San Diego. San Diego wins. Oceanside. And you've been in LA how long?

10 years. Oh, wow. You've been in comedy 10 years? No. I started doing comedy five, four and a half, five years ago. You originally came to LA for what? For a ticket out of San Diego. That makes sense.

What happened in San Diego? Fucking, it sucks. Oh, come on. Really? San Diego sucks, dude? It sucks. San Diego from all the movies? San Diego from all the movies. San Diego from all the movies.

San Diego from all the movies. I mean, it's fine, but there's nothing there that I want. I bet you want to go back now, though, because LA is North Korea. I'm going back later today. Yeah, of course. Not to move, for sure. To do what? Take your lips on a little tour of the state?

I'm going to show them around. They haven't seen it yet. They haven't? No, they haven't. They don't know. They don't know. Have your parents seen your new lips? They fucking hate them.

Yeah. They hate them. Yeah, I hate them. Do your parents seen your new lips? They fucking hate them. Yeah. They hate them. Yeah, hate them. Do you have brothers and sisters? I have two older brothers. Are they older bros? Oh, careful. Brendan will try to fuck those dudes.

They're not hot. Don't worry. Oh, it doesn't matter, man. Did you hear him say older bros? Well, I'm sure your older bros aren't pleased with your big lips. I don't know i'm not sucking their dick so it doesn't matter yeah but you're their little sis you know yeah now what do you think your parents don't like about it they're like why do you have to get they hate tattoos they

hate my tattoos they hate my lips they're like why are you doing this to yourself so you're on your parents shit list a little bit yeah because you're tatted up. Tatted up. You got your lips done. Lipped up, yeah. But who comments more about the lips about it? Your dad or mom, you think? Probably my mom. Oh, wow. Yeah. She's not into it.

Are they happy that you're a comic, though? Yeah. He means, is your mom hot? That's what he's trying to ask. No. Brennan's shy. And are they happy that I'm a comic? Yeah, sometimes.

Sometimes. They'll watch my shit and they're like, do you really have to talk like this happy that I'm a comic yeah sometimes sometimes they'll watch my shit and they're like do you really have to talk like this and I'm like oh my god yeah

don't come don't come don't watch yeah yeah I haven't come in four days actually oh good for you

thank you I'm doing pretty good you're a little prickly that makes sense a little prickly doing pretty good man who's funnier out of you and Chappelle, you think? Chappelle.

Is he really? Chappelle, yeah. Okay. Oh, you guys know each other? Yeah. Oh, just from the local scene? Yeah, yeah. Like, what, three years now?

Maybe four years? Maybe a lot. You've only been in LA three years, right? Yeah. But I met her beforehand. Yeah. Before I moved out here. Oh, dope.

Oh, what happened? Just like I met you two before I moved out here. I never met you before. Yeah, I did. We did? How dare you? I met you in before I moved out here. I never met you before. Yeah, I did. We did? I met you in 2016 at Tempe Improv. You're an asshole, man. And Hannibal Buress came through as well.

I remember that. It was a good time. And then I, when the fuck did I meet you? A while ago. I met you a while ago. Because I came to Phoenix. Y'all met at a damn, bro, you guys met in one of the stables at a Golden Corral. And then how do you guys know each other?

Let me guess. AA? I know you live. Let me guess. Theo was selling merch at his AA meeting? Yeah. First of all, both of you guys can't laugh like that. No, but even the control room's laughing.

He lit up his sponsor because the lettering was off. Good call. His sponsor's like, fuck. The tie-dye shirts are short? Fuck! That's how it works. And they are short. They are short.

Yeah, and you can mail those back to Brendan, actually, guys. So what else are we saying? Let's read some mean tweets or mean comments. Who picked these? Huh? Who picked these? A buddy of mine who is a huge fan of the show and wanted to do a contribute. Okay.

This guy sounds like a hater. Yeah, I know, right? He's like, hey, here, I'll pick these things out. He loves the show and wanted to do a contribute. Okay. This guy sounds like a hater. Yeah, I know, right? He's like, hey, here, I'll pick these things out. He loves the show. He's a huge fan of both of you. We're going to find out who he loves more, me or Theo, based off these. Or if he's fired or not.

Alright, Theo. Theo looks like the guy that pumps your gas and doesn't even work there Moto Rider 2024 Okay funny not his special When you read it I would stop after the thing and then wait a second and then let us know Great okay

Just to accentuate the joke Act like you're burning him Harness that anger from earlier So don't seem bored when I read it Squeeze some of the venom from your lips into your body. Just take a small puff. Ow!

I'm sorry. I think you look lovely, and I'm just joking. Nah, man. Do you feel like I'm making you? Subtle Diggs now. I know, right? I got you, girl. Don't worry.

Subtle Diggs is the name also of a black male somewhere in America, let's be honest. That's a rapper. Subtle Diggs. Subtle Diggs. What's up, baby? Subtle Diggs. Yeah, Subtle Diggs. He's tight. I'll throw, let's be honest. It's also a rapper. Subtle Diggs. Subtle Diggs. What's up, baby? Subtle Diggs. Yeah, Subtle Diggs. He's tight.

I'll throw a whiteout, too. So you don't think I'm being mean to you, do you? No, I don't think you're being mean to me. And honestly, I kind of like it, so it's fine. And by kind of, I mean really. Should I read another one? Yeah, please. Yeah, read away.

I'm good. Hold off on the name. You got it. Theo looks like the depressed version of Elf on the Shelf. That's a pretty good one. That's really good. Both of those are good. I thought the first one was good.

First one's all right. Second one's funny. You think? Yeah. Sat on the Shelf. I like that. It helps if you just stare into the camera while they read it about you, Brendan, because then it'll just sort of make it land better.

You know what I'm saying, though? It'll just help both of us. If I look at mine when they're reading it about you, Brendan, because then it'll just sort of make it land better. You know what I'm saying, though? Like, it'll just help both of us. Like, if I look at mine when they're reading it. Yeah, maybe. Hit it, girl. You can do some bricks. You can mix them up. Yeah, you mix them up.

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are no joke, son. That's Manscaped.com use code king sting okay i like this one um theo looks like the kid who wrapped his mouth around the water fountain faucet guilty as charged for me yeah i i deep throw the shit out that faucet as a kid yeah man we're gonna want a water fountain for christmas buddy but he wanted chocolate milk in it. I want gravy out of that bitch. That's gross, Brendan.

That's dumb. All right, are we ready for Brendan? Yeah. Okay. Brendan looks like a tourist who travels between genders. That's the best one yet. Oh, I'll be over here in Pussburg. Bro, that's killer. That's from Rick Riley. Yeah, just driving from Pussburg to Daytona today.

Call me Brenda. On some days. Crossing state lines, better put my tampon in. Brendan looks like he got homesick at his own sleepovers. I can see that. I can see that, dude. And I'm going to remember this the way I remember right now. My favorite one ever that I read was,

Brendan looks like the kind of guy that rides a horse with both legs off to the same side. That was my favorite one ever. This is one of my all-time faves that I sent to Theo and Brendan once. Halkion TV says, Brendan looks like the most powerful protester in Portland.

He was rocking the beanie and the flannel. Oh, fuck. Oh, shit. All right. How about one of the dudes that looks like the type of guy that slaps his own ass at the games? Honestly, in episode one or two, you killed it with Theo looks like the kid at the arcade who just stands in the back because he doesn't have any quarters.

You look like the kid who goes to the arcade but is too broke so he watches everybody else play. Oh, that was me. Like, play. Oh, that move was sick. Yeah, yeah. Back up, bro. Thank you. Back the fuck up, bro. My parents love me. You have no quarters. Get the fuck back. That was me, bro. And when that dude was done I would go up real quick and try to touch the controls

to see if it would still work a little. Hopefully they still had some lives left and shit. And then just push the little slots in for the quarters. Those original Kings? Yeah, that was just you guys riffing one or two. What else you got, Gabby? Anything else in the tank over there?

Yeah, I do got a couple. Brennan looks like he's social distancing with his heterosexuality. Six feet apart. Six feet apart. As soon as we get that vaccine, though, we're going to reconnect. Hope you don't.

For the culture corner, got a couple. Chappelle looks like he's carrying the guilt of punching a baby. I could see that, actually. What? I mean. I could see you doing something violent like that. I don't punch babies. Dude, wasn't there that story about you

where you killed your baby sister or something? Remember that? About me? Yeah. That's a different guy. Yeah, a different black guy. I think that's Baby Unique. Baby Unique is somewhere right now.

With a snake. He's wrestling a fucking boa right now. He's slithering through Stockton right now, I'm sure. That's a nice one, though. I mean, I don't punch babies, but... Yeah, anything else that's good in there? You know, there's a...

I'll fire him off. Only if it's good. Okay. They're not that good. You might get some next week, girl. I probably will. She also brought in some tiktoks for us uh we had gianni kind of educate us on the world of tiktok you also brought in some for us do you want to walk us through these since then your boy jumped on tiktok shout out to gianni yeah he got me started on there how do you feel about it you know i'm just

too old for it it's pretty embarrassing i tried pop pop locking it for the kids. Did you? There you go. I put a thong on, said follow me, but that was for OnlyFans. Do they have a better one about me? Because I don't like the Punch Baby. You like the Wesley Sides one? I like the Wesley Sides one. That shit's hilarious. That was a good one. I've never forgotten that. That one was pretty good. The other ones are kind of nice.

Chappelle is the whitest black guy I've ever come across. We know that. That's a guy. I like how they said that's the nicest one. I don't think that's nice, Chappelle. Thank you. I appreciate that.

Nick looks like he's going to start a fire with some rocks and cook you a mean steak. Again, that seems pretty nice. That's nice. That sounds like a nice night out on the town. Wow. Yeah, it does. Anything else? There's no David Letterman jokes about Nick? There's tons on there.

Not in this one. Yeah, well, he's fired. But there was some absolute gold on this picture of... Oh, and they said Little Browse looks like Simple Jack. They also said Nick and Little Browse look like the cavemen

from the Geico commercials. Yeah, the caveman from the Geico commercials. That's what you got, Nick? I've actually been getting that my entire life. Oh, Nick. Let's see. There was some fire in here. I think that was in Cats.

It might be on Cats profile. Word. Want to go to the TikToks? Yeah, let's get into some talks. Let's keep it moving. Yeah, let's talk it up and talk. Some tickety talks. Oh, I thought this guy's so funny.

It's going to be embarrassing if you guys don't. Are we millennials? Are you a millennial? I think I am. Are we Generation Z? You're like the last... Yeah. The last millennials.

All right. You're the last of it? Yeah. am the last. Are we Generation Z? You're like the last, yeah. The last millennials. You're the last of it? Yeah. Or the beginning. Are you a millennial? Yeah, big time. Will you count me in? Oh, I love this song. I've been awake for a while now.

There we go. Yeah, that was the jam. I agree. That boy got a little sugar in his tank, but that's the jam. That's Roderick, bro. Yeah, that's's the jam. That's Roderick, bro. That's Roderick. I'm not shocked, dude. There's Nick.

What else you got, Nick? This guy is wild. Oh, look! If it wasn't the person who was making fun of my beautiful new makeup routine! So you're saying it wasn't you? I'm so sorry for snapping at you just now. Psych, motherfucker. As soon as you came into the room, my Wuhan lie detector picked you up as a snake-ass bitch. Now watch me practice my Gangnam Style.

Fucking bizarre kid. That dude needs a therapist, huh? But he does all of these TikToks that look like he's really unhinged. I watch them. I'm like, what the fuck is going on here? That's probably his way of asking for help. Maybe.

And betterhelp.com. His TikTok is un-fucking-hinged. It is? Un-hinged. Casey Fry is the best, I think. Who's that? Does that guy have a huge following? Yeah, he does.

Is he killing it? Yeah, he has like 2 million followers. Really? Yeah. That's insane. But there's something different about TikTok, right? a huge following yeah he's like killing it yeah he has like two million followers really yeah that's insane but there's just there's something different about tick tock right it's like it's like um like what is that dude gonna do you can't go watch him do something yeah i know that's the way off tick tock right some people can maybe but i don't know what maybe they do q

a's maybe i don't know didn't some girl like who got famous on TikTok just get a Netflix special and it bombed? Oh, wow. Yeah, I don't remember her. That sucks for her. Yeah. Maybe Hannah Gadsby. That thing was horrible. It was?

I mean. The woke culture loved it. Oh, they did? Yeah. Yeah, I think. If you want men and women to be the same thing. Yeah, it was? I mean. The woke culture loved it. Oh, they did? Yeah. Yeah, I think. If you want men and women to be the same thing. Yeah, it was a TED Talk.

Oh, it was a TED Talk. Oh. Well. I'll check it out tonight. I don't know. Maybe I might like it. Oh, he said it went well. Oh, no.

Well, because she's the Trump girl. No. Isn't she the one that did all the Trump bits? Wait. She did the Trump impressions. Yeah, and then they gave her a special. That's her.

Yeah. So she would always make fun of Trump. I never got it. She got a special. Yeah. It never caught on for me because all she did was like it would be a voiceover for Trump and she would just like mimic his words. Lip sync over it.

And people were like, this is fantastic. I was like, what? That's the weird thing about that app. She just cuts clips of Trump's speech and then then she would lip them, and then it would go super viral, and then Netflix gave her a special. Good for her for getting a special, though. Make that money. Yeah, good for you.

It's just so fucking crazy, though, that that's how people can get famous. It was just that was the thing at the time, right? Like, you know, obviously- But there's always a thing. Here's the one thing, though. There's always a thing like- Put them on game. That seems like it might be cool if you're watching,

if you're like thinking, oh, man, I'm bummed she got that, you know? But that's not resilient. There's no longevity to it. Right, right. That's going to be that. That's it. It's for the moment. Yeah.

Quick. Yeah. It's just not going to be. Especially since Trump didn't get reelected. Yeah. So it's like, well, that's your thing. It's like, now what are you going to do? Yeah. But, you re-elected yeah so it's like that's your thing it's like now what are you gonna do yeah but you know but yeah that's the longevity i mean it's just like i remember there was kids you know i remember being when i was doing comedy in the

beginning and owen benjamin and nick thune got they both got like big deals from myspace i think it was or something else like half a million dollars each to make like videos or something it was like nobody had ever gotten anything like that like it was just crazy and so i remember everybody thinking like oh man you know like these guys they they won it they did it you know and they still both have careers and stuff but it's not it's just like you just don't know kind of where things are going to be at yeah there's like fads and trends yeah yeah yeah so where's the longevity right you just don't know kind of where things are going to be at. There's like fads and trends. Yeah.

So where's the longevity? Right. You know what I mean? What was the one that was like TikTok? Oh my God, the little video one. Vine? Vine, yeah, yeah, yeah. So many people got famous off that.

A lot of still famous Viners though out there, I feel like. Is there? I think so. But some parlayed it, right? Like they got real famous on Vine and they started bringing their talents to Instagram. Dalia got huge off of Vine, dog. Huge. D'Elia got really big off Vine

and then he kind of, that crowd, he went to Instagram with it. And then off that, off him doing Vine, he got a fucking start at Eminem video. They saw that video of him rapping and Eminem reached out to him and he's in the Eminem Logic video.

Yeah. Just off Vine and Instagram. Instagram doesn't translate to tick tock though it's weird they're like so not the same yeah tick tock makes me feel old yeah it's so embarrassing i tried i'm like on it now and i'm like this is embarrassing when i see what goes viral i'm like i just don't get it yeah yeah well one thing about tick tock i notice if i watch it it's more fun to watch stuff on tick on TikTok than it is on Instagram I feel like. It is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It is. It makes me just feel good. It's easier to

navigate. Can people leave comments on there? Yeah. You can. Or is it different than Instagram? You leave comments, but they're always really positive. TikTok commenters are pretty freaking funny. It's like Reddit commenters. It's all about what algorithm you get caught on on your TikTok because

at the end of the night, Jules is always on TikTokok and she's watching like to do's like how to's and like uh uh do it yourself type things and it's like educational but then like someone else's tiktok if you're like a child it'll be all kids dancing so if you interact with it it can get better like you could you could get be fed only mma shit or only theo shit uh no no you would kill it I announced it that I was going to a couple weeks ago and I just never on this show kill it uh-huh kill it thanks you got something about him you know that's tick tock ish these are my trippin he was busy making the studio this came from the Facebook group We've got a couple submissions from it

Someone was like King it or sting it Extreme thick boy bite club Oh shit Oh dog Fuck no Insane I would die

I said music to the music Cause the guy dies at the end. They played this at his funeral? Yeah, it's Cuckoo Dog. What the hell? Fuck. Nah. Nah, not for me.

I love biking, but you got to be a real badass to do that. Yeah. Is your biking from San Fran still happening? Get on your bike, big guy. Yeah, I'm going San Fran still happening? Get on your bike. I'm going San Fran to LA though. I got word. My guys are specialized. Like you don't want to ride up to San Fran.

Cause I guess the winds, it's a nightmare. Cause the winds from the Pacific. So you gotta go down. So yeah. All right. And I'm doing it with you. Do you even have a bike dog?

I can get a bike. I can get a diamond. In a sidebar. I can get a diamond back. You know what I mean? They still make diamond backs. Huffies. Get those. You know?

Put some jean shorts on. Rollerblade your ass down. I'm not going to fucking rollerblade. You could rollerblade. You look like a rollerblade. I could rollerblade, but I'm not a rollerblader. I'd skate. I'd skate by you.

What do you do for athleticism these days, Gabby? Nothing. Okay. Were you popular in high school? No. No? Not at all. What was your vibe in high school?

Like goth? No. I get a little bit of goth vibe. No, I was like surfer girl. Oh. Very surfer girl. Surfer girl. Yeah, but I was always made fun of.

I was never really cool. Because you weren't good at surfing? Were you a good swimmer or what? I was a good swimmer. Yeah, yeah. I was on swim team. Ask good questions, Brendan. I'm trying to get the vibe of you in high school, Because you weren't good at surfing? Were you a good swimmer or what? I was a good swimmer. Yeah, yeah. I was on swim team. Ask good questions, Brennan. I'm trying to get the vibe of you in high school

so you weren't popular. Why, dude? She's an adult now. Why are you trying to get the vibe of a female high schooler? Well, I'm trying to get the vibe of San Diego, dog. That's the foundation. That's the foundation. I don't know her like you did.

My bad. I haven't heard her stories in AAV. I don't know her. We've never been in AAV. Clearly where you guys met at. I've never seen you in AAV. We've never been in AA meetings. Clearly where you guys met at. I've never seen you in AA. We've never been in AA. Really?

You're going the wrong one. That's why I love you so. This is lit. Lit. Theo starts every AA meeting with a hot 15. Yeah, let's go, Theo. New material night every Thursday. Get his merch out the back.

I always try to. A needle in my arm. Walk into each other. That's my time. I always try to. A needle in my arm walked into each other. That's my time. Get your hitter. Two for 20. Cash only. I always try and get laughs when I share.

And it's a fucking. It's so bad. Do you do that? I don't do that. Sometimes I maybe do. But it's hard to get out of that mindset. It's really hard. I know people that are in his meetings say it feels fucking hilarious.

Oh, really? Wow. They're not supposed to tell about that. I know. That's just alcoholics. Yeah, that's alcoholics, man. But is it weird if I ask why you go to AA meetings? Well, you can assume why. I just have a drinking problem.

Yeah. Did you really have a drinking problem? You know, it started after I got my – thank you. After I got my second DUI last year, drinking problem? Yeah you know It started After I got my Thank you After I got my second DUI last year I was like Oh damn You realize you had a problem Damn girl

Two DUIs You get a third You get slammer Yeah the first one I got almost 10 years ago So it was like Almost off my record Oh that's not bad

Yeah It's not that bad of an average Of one every 10 years Plus how about Drinking are we talking here Denzel from fucking flight or we don't If he's a factor 50 where you at, you know It wasn't like it took me a while to realize like it was actually bad cuz I wasn't like a class I wasn't like the fucking wake up and drink vodka your functioning. Yeah

Yeah, but I would just drive a lot when I would get wasted and that's where I was that's a problem That's not good. Especially there's Ubers now. What did you like about that when you think about that? What did you like about, was there something you liked about being in the vehicle? Is there something like that? I like being in control. I like being in control of my environment. So I was like, every time I wanted to leave, I was like, I'm fucking driving.

People would be like, you're wasted. And I'd be like, I'm good at driving now. No one took your keys? Get on a bird, girl. Get on a bird and feel in control. It was really stupid. What was your drink of choice? Beer.

What kind of beer? We're talking about a Mickey's. IPAs. I love IPAs. Hipster beer. Your mouth ain't watering right now? It can't water. It really can't. I'll probably be in your meetings about a year from now. Something watering? Yeah, beer and tequila. It can't water. It can't. It really can't. These are so stiff. It is.

Yeah, I'll probably be in your meetings about a year from now. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's some alcoholics at home that are pissed that she was addicted to beer, you know? When I was the only one with beer? Some guy was like, I was shooting. Beer and tequila. I drank everything, but if I had to choose, I would say beer and tequila. Some guy was like, I was injecting heroin directly under my arms this bitch can't handle an ipa

that did it did make me question it a lot though because i was like you go to aa and you hear all these fucking stories and i was like i'm like i wasn't like it makes you feel good right someone's like i used to take one of my eyes out and hide my wife's cocaine behind it. Dude, I had a buddy in college, and at the time, you drink on the weekends, but he was drinking Monday through Sunday. And then he couldn't get drunk enough from just consuming it through his mouth, so he started taking enemas and putting them up his ass. He's in up his butthole. Whiskey. It's called boofing.

They call it boofing. Nick knows about it. Nick's been out there. You know what I'm talking about, Nick. Nick been in the streets. Nick woke up on the wrong end of a booth, I'm sure. Will you take us to a boofing thing? Yeah, what is that?

That's sticking something up your butt. This is white culture. Sticking something up your butt for what? With the intent to get high. Not to be confused with key string, which is sticking something up your butt with the attempt to conceal. Yes, different. Also known as a mule in the cartels.

But also, he would soak the enemas in whiskey, put them up his booty, and then he would also sniff whiskey. Dude, I had a kid, this kid in school. He started working for the cartel. He's on the run now. That's how that ended. This kid was growing up. His name was Cater, right?

Like after the service, you know his name was Cater right like after the service you know sure Cater yeah and they he got stopped by the cops one time

he was with another guy that we grew up with and he had a bunch of weed and he tried to put it up his butt really did it work huh

it's pretty dry I mean he didn't know it was horrible sounds like a bad idea he got pulled over and he was like hold on pull his pants down put the seat back ask he got pulled over and then he was like, hold on, hold on, hold on. Pulled his pants down, put the seat back.

Asked his buddy to help him. He's like, dude, get it in here. And was trying to put it in. It was like, a lot of it was like shaking stuff. It was just horrible. Horrible idea. So the cops busted him just like that. Like just a bunch of weed hanging out of his butt.

Yeah. But there's also been some people with like cocaine. They put them in, you them in bags and shit. And then when the cops go to get them, they put them up their ass or they swallow them. And then those fucking bags burst. And then they die. Yeah, everybody knows that. Yeah, that happened to a rapper.

Who? Oh, that did happen to a rapper. What's his name? He's on a private jet and the cops were there. So he swallowed all of it. Oh, Juice WRLD. Fucking shit. Yeah, Juice WRLD. Oh, Juice World. Fucking shit. Yeah, Juice World.

Oh, that's what happened to Juice World? Yeah. Damn. No shit. Yeah, Juice World passed away like that. He was on a private jet. The cops were, like, when he landed, the cops were going. The pilot.

How about this? The bitch-ass pilot, the snitch, was like, they're doing drugs on the plane. When I land, be there. So when they landed, there's all these cops. So he's like, oh, fuck, and swallowed the bags. The bags. No shit. Shout out to Juice World. Damn. So when they landed there's all these cops who's like oh fuck and swallowed the bags Yeah, he was so young too wasn't he yeah Yeah, this is my favorite fucking scene ever. This is what it reminded me of when she said she was addicted to IPAs

Today because I'm addicted to marijuana marijuana marijuana marijuana man this is some bullshit marijuana is not a drug I used to suck dick for coke

that's an addiction similar it is. It is. Addicted to IPAs. That's crazy. Just IPAs. IPAs mean fuck up.

How many we talk in a day you take down? No, I mean, like, I would drink more. It doesn't sound like she has a problem. Yeah, but you think she's in the Zach Brown band or something? Fucking cut her some slack, man. You think she's waking up and just drinking Blue Moon until she can't see out of the window? No, she would have some and then drive home.

Do you guys not understand a story she told? That doesn't sound like a problem. Sounds like a good time. So what happened in the TV live? So she'd have a few shock tops and jump on the bird. That sounds like the end of the world, man. I know. She might not be an alcoholic forever.

She's in there right now. Fuck. I know I'm not A tail on a donkey You don't give up that vibe An alcoholic? No Well I do

You don't fuck with wild turkey Or anything like that That's my shit I mean I would drink all of it But if I had a choice That's what I would drink the most of Brothers always want to have a meat You know

No matter what it is You don't fuck with that wild turkey You don't want to have wild turkey girl Hey man You got to have wild turkey on the bone You don't fucking have wild turkey? You don't want to have wild turkey, girl? Hey, man, you got to have wild turkey on the bone. You don't fucking know boars had another one? Unbelievable, man.

Oh, I miss that stuff, but I don't. Well, proud of you for beating it. Yeah, thank you. Yeah, good job. Thank you. I mean, beating it.

We'll see. Can you guys meet during COVID? No. Some of them, but like mostly Zoom meetings. Yeah. You can meet in COVID, right? No, some of them, but mostly Zoom meetings. You can meet in COVID, right?

Yeah, I just can't believe you guys outed this girl about her AA stuff. That's fine, that's fine. She's the one that brought it up. She did? Yeah, she said it. Because I said you guys met at an AA because I clearly am a detective. How did you know, though? Because I didn't tell you.

Because I know. I know the vibe. And Theo just brings a new buddy around every other week that he makes. I'm fine talking about it. There's that. And I like you. All my friends are former addicts. So welcome. Thank you.

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Liquid D for your mouth. Let's see what this guy has to say. We've got a king in our sting it. Brendan, Theo, Culture Corner. First off, thank you guys for what you do. Thank you for the free content every week. I look forward to it every week. I've got a king in our sting it for you this week. I look forward to it every week. I've got a King it or Sting it for you this week.

Male nurses. First off, King it or Sting it. Gaylord Fockers. Second question. You get jacked up in a car wreck. You prefer a male nurse or a female nurse? Gang, gang. Buzz, buzz.

Oh, I'm never mad at some Gaylord Fockers. Earn? Big Earn? No, no, buzz. Oh, I'm never mad at some gay Lord. I'm never mad at some Erne. Erne? Big Erne? No, no, no. That's, that's, that's

RN. That's RN. What's his name, Rin? Is it Rin? Rin? Well, thanks for submitting that, Rin. Thanks, Rin.

This guy's probably like, God damn, man. You guys are idiots. I like male nurses, dog. Okay, Brendan, you ain't got to say it like that. I prefer a female. You know what I'm saying? I prefer a soft touch of a female.

What about masseuse? Male or female? Do you want to take this one? I like male masseuse, man. There you go. I can't have a male masseuse. I can't relax. I like a male because I'm like...

He's real gay gay Let's be honest Where you might like it Yeah Yeah exactly I think you get a good Viet Or somebody like that Or somebody who's

Polynesian thigh And you get them To do it They do good Nah I got a big Russian bitch Or a big fat white girl Just with her

Fat ass elbow On my back I love that shit You can't handle a man Or when they walk On your back You can't handle a man They walk on your your back? You can't handle a man? They walk on your back?

Oh, you got fat people to walk on your back with them big cushy feet like elephants? Are you serious? I've never had a massage before. Really? You don't like people touching you?

Hell no. You're like Jay. Do you not? I keep hitting you. Sorry. You guys are shocked he hasn't had a massage. He hasn't been in a relationship

until last year. Yeah. Okay? Come on now. I don't like people touching my shoulders and shit. I'm not massaging Palm Beach end of the year, dog. I don't like people touching my shoulders and shit. We'll get you a massage in Palm Beach end of the year, dog.

Hey, I don't want no massage. You really want one? No, fuck no. You look tight in the... Bro, I would not get angry about it. Yeah, that's true. You're right, you're right. I was going a little hard.

That's exactly why you need one. I was going hard on massages. You need one to relax. Steel gets them every fucking week. That was a little tense. I go get them all the time, man. I love them. Yeah, jack-tock-tock.

What do you do? Maybe it won't work, Chappelle. Yeah, a place in Westwood called Siri Foot Spa, S-I-R-I. So you'll pay this poor dude 40 bucks. Hold on. I said, how much for a full body? He goes, 40 for an hour, bro. 40 for an hour.

Bro, it's 40 for an hour. I will tell you, this is how the guy finishes. He stands in front of you, right? And he will backflip and fucking land in the middle of your back. No. Really? No, he does. Unbelievable.

Yeah. It's $40. I tip $40. That's sex trafficking. I tip $40. That's what that is. That guy's crying for help. You don't think it's weird?

He's always doing these fucking tricks for you all the time? He's trying to get fucking out of there, bro. Help me. He's never said any of that. I thought he was at one point doing some type of braille, yeah, borscht coat on my arm, but he isn't. How old is he? This man, anywhere from probably

19 to 45. You can't tell. You can't tell. How old do you think he is? 35. Thank you. 51. 51? No, not 51. Are you 35? I just. 51. 51? No, not 51.

Oh, okay. Are you 35? I just turned 43. What? Oh, you just turned 43. Wow, congratulations. Happy birthday, Chad. Thank you. When was your birthday?

Not just, but April. I feel like that's close enough to say just. Okay. Nope, it's the new year, Chad. Gabby, how old do you think Kat is? 28. That's offensive. That's the first.

I'm 25. 25? Okay. You have the maturity of a 28-year-old. Thank you. There you go. Good recovery. Yeah, thank you.

Do I look older? How old do you think I am? How old do I think you are? When you told me you're a millennial, I would say you're 31. What? I would say that you are 26. Hey, real quick. You know what?

Honestly, I don't know your age, but I'm going to guess like 27. Hold on. Before you answer, let me backtrack because I thought millennial was 30 or older. No.

What is it? No, I'm a millennial. You're a millennial? Yeah, I'm like at the very bottom of millennial. Oh, damn. So it's not 31. I would say you're 27.

You guys are all close. 29. Damn, 29, huh? Shorty growing up. How old do you think I am? Black don't crack. 33. But it sells crack if it's your dad, though.

Sorry, that was just a joke. We'll take that out. No, no, keep that in. I'm generation Y, or also known as millennial. All right, all right. Yeah, I'm 33. Are you really? Are you really, Chappelle? Fuck, I got it. You also known as millennial. All right. All right. Yeah, I'm 33. Are you really?

Are you really, Chappelle? Fuck, I got it. You're growing up, man. I know. I'll be 34 January 23rd. Oh, praise God. Growing up, we got a serious girl. Moved in a new crib.

Damn. Coming up. I know. Headlining his own dates and shit. Yeah, we just had the move-in talk. Y'all did? Did you? What is that?

What is the move-in talk? Like, let's move in again who brought it up her you her her oh yeah do you have a man um yeah oh you hesitated it's new or you guys are on the kind of it's new okay there you go what kind of guy is he like is he white guy yeah okay wow you've only been with white guys old-fashioned well if you've seen all the commercials everybody on commercials now is mixed race couples you notice that yeah every commercial every commercial fucking commercial yeah it's your vision beige power baby that's true every commercial nespn um you where'd you guys meet at is he a comic no no no god no uh mutual friends hell yeah

and have you ever dated outside of your race that means black yeah and mexican and mexican wow i usually go for it but you don't think she's dated a mexican before get the fuck out of here that's true but you settled on a white you settled on a white i settled on a white but who knows you know you can end long future is it new is it new Brendan Brendan let her live her life

dude you asked her if she got with any black guys yeah have you been with any black women I felt like we were in a circle of trucks

I was with a black woman yes you been with a black woman I think so man I think so have you ever been with an Asian too I don't see you in Asians

a Korean lady I think this was years ago in Boise Idaho in Boise in Boise Have you ever been with an Asian, Theo? I don't see you in Asians. A Korean lady, I think. This was years ago in Boise, Idaho. In Boise? Not a lot of Asians out there. I was just there last weekend. I didn't see one different race than white. There were some Mexican guys. There were some Mexicans in the crowd.

Yeah, there were some Mexicans. This lady, she was... I don't know what her name was. Would you meet her at a show? Maybe. You met her at a show? I don't remember. Are you trying to get a massage?

No, I met her in person. I met her in person. Ooh. Okay. Wow. A Korean and a black. Wow. Nick, have you ever been

with a black girl? Oh, dang. I'm like Chappelle's late bloomer with like serious relationships. Jules is my first first like real girlfriend proud of you guys me and Nick are killing it

fuck everybody they're talking about 2020 it's crazy I'm sad me and Nick are killing it best nine months of my life yeah wow

come on love is tight love is tight love is tight now back to the black girl though Nick Jules is in the next room so we'll never talk Love is tight. Love is tight. Now back to the black girl though, Nick. Jules is in the next room, so we'll have some respect, Brendan. I've never been with a black girl.

Have you not? Have not. That Korean girl was 0.3% of the Boise population. Wow, diamond in the rough. I should have broke out my metal detector while I was there. Dude, diamond in the ramen. What's up? Diamond in the Ramen? Hell yeah.

Almost good. Almost good. Almost good. Really close that Diamond in the Ramen. That was good. After almost 100 shows, you're rubbing off on me, brother. That Diamond in the Ramen. You just have to say it a little better.

A little more, yeah. Delivery. It's all about delivery. Oh, that Diamond in the Ramen. That's smooth. But I said diamond in the rough, and then I thought of diamond in the ramen. It was too late. I don't know.

I think you did it pretty good. Actually, it wasn't that bad. Thanks. You liked it. I liked it. Thank you. Yeah, but he works for you. I work for you, too, and I laugh at your stuff.

That's a good point. Thank you, bro. Here's this guy He's me So we don't know what's good So we don't know what's true We don't know the truth I feel like

I feel like Nick's A good indicator though If it's funny That could be true Yeah Chin is Awake Chin's alive

Cat's a good indicator too Cat's a pretty good indicator Yeah she is Cat doesn't bullshit That's true Yeah She gives a 100 What's this young man

Saying with the horse He's next to a horse That's a mini horse I know a mini horse Oh it's true. Yeah, she gives him 100. What's this young man saying with the horse? He's next to a horse. That's a mini horse. I know a mini horse. Oh, it's Mr. Hands. What's up, gang? Pearson from Orange County. I'm here with Willow.

We just want to know. Keeping little peach fuzz hitters like this in the zoo? We're letting them out. Gang, gang. Fuzz, fuzz. Oh, I love that nose. Here's the thing, dog. You can't let those things out.

They'll fucking die. Why? Those love that nose. Here's the thing, dog. You can't let those things out. They'll fucking die. Wow. Those mini horses aren't made for the wild. They breed them to be that small? They breed them. I think it's like a mini horse is a donkey and a horse. Because donkeys can't, or it's a mule, can't procreate. Yeah.

Oh. Yeah. I seen a donkey fuck up a hyena. Like have sex with it? No. Were you in Tijuana? No, like beat the fuck out of it oh yeah donkeys like beat up hyenas and shit where's the zoo i don't know where the hell it was

because hyenas are in africa that shit i ain't lying hyenas are in africa oh there's tony manners on this past weekend oh didn't his dad just passed away someone just passed away i meant to text you guys like oh He's definitely a cancer. Yeah, I think it's just I think it might be the second video his brother passed away And his mother That's what they do. That's in Africa. Watch me nay-nay, huh?

This thing is lit out here. No. Yeah, y'all thought I was lying. Another great TikTok. No. Dude, and that might have been the fact. Watch me nay-nay. How fast was that?

Fucking that thing up. Yeah, I like hyenas, man. What's wrong with that fucking thing? You like hyenas? Nothing happened. It's two animals playing. No, I think he's dead. I think that hyena's dead. No, he isn't.

It's a hyena, dude. They don't die if you pull them by the neck. You stomped them out and then you fucking broke his neck. All animals get pulled from the neck, though. I wouldn't tighten my body up if a donkey was pulling me around. I know, right? I'd go limp, too. Yeah.

I would tighten up. You would? Yeah. If a donkey was pulling you? Right up, yeah. Have you ever been attacked by a man? No. Oh, damn. No, I wouldn tighten up. You would? Yeah. I would stick him right up. Yeah. Have you ever been attacked by a man? No. Oh, damn.

No, I wouldn't know if I had that. You ever been attacked by anything? Any sharks or anything surfing all the time? No. We can't. I'm just going to skip past that. Did you say old man? Because I wanted to breeze by that.

I wanted to keep the show going. He got mad at me for asking if he hooked up with black guys. He's like, come on, Brendan. Have you ever been hit by a dude? No. And that's the show going. He got mad at me for asking to be hooked up with black guys. He's like, come on, Brendan. Have you ever been hit by a dude? No. And that's the safe zone. He's been attacked. I just wanted to.

I like good stories. Here's a guy right here. Hey, y'all. It's Ace again. I got another one for you. It's real simple. His eyes look fake. Debate club.

King Kong or Jaws? Gang gang? Buzz buzz. Well, there's a lot of factors that go into it. Are they fighting in the ocean? What do you think, Chen? Take us into some of this. I know you guys, fishing is big in y'all's industry.

What did you guys do? And invented King Kong. Yeah, and invented King Kong. So take us, yeah, why don't you and Kat, give us just some inside information on this. They invented Godzilla. Yeah, we did Godzilla. Yeah, and invented King Kong. So take us, yeah, why don't you and give us some inside information on this. Yeah, we did Godzilla. Yeah. Oh. King Kong's American, dog. Oh yeah, King Kong, yeah, he went

in New York. Y'all some assholes. Yeah, King Kong's as American as it gets. Godzilla's Korean-Japanese. I've talked to King Kong. He got an issue with it. But there's always been an issue between black and Asian, I feel like. There has been. I don't know what it is.

Black and yellow crime. Is that true? Especially Korean and blacks. We don't fuck with each other. Oh, for the longest time in the 90s. In LA. We're so far apart

from each other. I know. No, no. We live in the same area. South Central. Oh, you're talking about the LA riots. I was talking about

Africa and Asia. Oh, yeah. But you're talking about the LA riots. Yeah. The liquor stores. Yeah, the liquor stores. What happened?

What was their beef? Was it any two people started it? Do you guys feel like it? It was a bunch of fucking black people fucking running amok. It was a black people trying to rob their stores. And the Koreans got on top with automatic rifles and were shooting them. But there's one incident, the craziest incident that started to kick it off, was this little black girl trying to steal orange juice.

And then the lady ended up killing juice and then the lady killed her and the lady killed her she shot her because the girl's hitting her in the head with the orange juice i think it was the orange juice with her stuff like that yeah and then the she's an older korean lady she's grabbed the gun and shot her and that is this on tiktok jesus christ it is not on tiktok no i don't know wow we just got real dark in here. Yeah. TikTok does get educational. I don't even know. It does. That's why I thought it was on there. Hey, but also what's weird is when you see a group of Koreans,

like American Koreans that are kind of from the hood, quote, unquote. They're called Corys. By the Howlin' Rays. They're called Corys, yeah. Yeah. When they feel like they have the right to use the N-word. Have you ever heard Koreans use the N-word? I've heard Asians in general, yeah.

They use it. A lot of Asians in the Bay Area will use the N-word. It's so weird. There's an Asian rapper, his whole album, he's just saying it the whole time. A lot of Cambodians from Long Beach also. Really? That's a big one. Wow, the Cambos, huh?

Yeah, Cambos. That's what they call them. Yeah, that's what they call them. Oh, God, I didn't know that. Slavs, Cambos, everybody has a nickname. Oh, okay. What was the first one? Slims, Muslims.

Slims. Oh, Slims. And I made that one up. That's a good one. That's a really good one. Thank you very much, dude. Slims. Oh, dude, if you want the RSs, man, I got them, bro.

The Ingrams from Ohio. Here they are. Family issue. Now, what was that last guy we never even answered? Jaws or Godzilla? Well, because you thought it was Asian. It depends where it goes down. If it's in the water, obviously Jaws would fuck him up.

If it's on land, King Kong would win. King Kong's too big, though. Yeah, but how tall is King Kong? He could stand up in the water. He's too giant. It's obviously going to take place on the shore guys right they're not going to be able to fight otherwise king kong what about the movie oh the movie which movie's better yeah the king kong with jack black's pretty good and the new king kong

with uh samuel jackson's really good too oh kong island yeah kong island's dope samuel jackson's sober do you know that no he is 25 is. 25 years sober. No shit. 25 years? You can tell when you're watching him. I just realized that yesterday. Yeah, he has a pretty great story. I didn't have no idea. You know he won't say no to any role or any part.

That's why you see him in a jiggling fucking thing. If his agents bring it to him, he says yes to everything. Huh. More you know. What else you got, Nick? The Ingram. All right, guys. I got to king it or sting it for you.

Letting your kids watch Rick and Morty, Brendan, or letting your kids listen to Eminem, edited, of course. Somebody please help me. Yay. I think my dad's going crazy. Thanks, guys. We love you. Bye.

Super cute. Listen, me and my son watched every season, every. We love you. Bye. Super cute. Listen, me and my son watched every season, every episode of Rick and Morty. He's obsessed with Pickle Rick, so I got him Pickle Rick toys. And then from there, season four, Big Mouth just dropped, so we started watching Big Mouth. Don't watch that with your kid. It is so fucking vulgar. Oh, vulgar. Or just don't watch that.

That show looked gross. No, no. It's funny. Big Mouth is fantastic. I love Big Mouth. Big Mouth watch that that show looked gross no no it's not big mouth i love it it looked gross i wasn't first episode it seemed gross no nick kroll killed it with yeah it's so funny but don't watch it with your kid i fucked up don't watch it with your kid theo i don't have a kid no not that you know of i just threw it out there i am a kid i won't watch it yeah it's great though but rick and morty i would uh rick and morty can watch with the kid it is yeah that really yeah for sure i was watching it the other night i was like damn this

is there's so much cussing i'm not worried about cussing it's weird when people like i'm not worried about it because i wasn't sheltered from cussing either like as long as your kid knows when to use it when not to yeah it's when you tell them not to do is when they start doing it with my son like you know not to say that around adults and in school right he's like yeah yeah like cool man he's like now give me a fucking uh take me to fucking bed huh pick a ring uh do you have like age restrictions on movies and like our movies and stuff i i watched everything as a kid i watched everything too i feel like we're pretty normal nick yeah so i don't really constrain my son with anything. I just let him know I did fuck up though because he loves music videos like he's obsessed with like Doja Cat and fucking all that stuff

BTS he loves BTS. That's his favorite cake. Yeah. Yep But I fucked up because I want to go make coffee and the new weekend video came on. Have you seen that? No. It's the most violent fucked up video I've seen. It starts off with these two models who just have, they just had like nose jobs, find his head on the middle of the road. And then they're obsessed with weekend. So then they have, they,

they hire like a guy to come over and dance for him. They kill him, cut his head off, put weekend's head on it and then have sex with the dead body. Jesus fuck. Well, my son saw that. How old is your son?

He's going to be five. So he's four. I was going to make him older. We didn't like to show off how much he knows. He's six and 13 months. He's going to be 15 in 10 years. No, I fucked up, though, because now he's terrified of the weekend.

Yeah. I have not watched that. Oh, at Friday night, he can't even go to bed. Yeah. Terrified of the weekend. Damn. This one's a good one to get us ready and send in your Christmas submissions. This is Kat's boyfriend, isn't it?

I'd say my boyfriend's a little hotter. Dang. Are we allowed to pull up a side-by-side? Yeah, pull up a side-by-side. Stevie's definitely better looking. Whoa, dude. Calm down, bro. That's a man.

Stevie's a very good-looking man. That's a man. Stevie's better looking. This guy, yeah. No offense to this man. He's also good-looking. It's just I have a problem. It sounds like you don't like this guy.

He probably seems like a nice guy, too. This guy's hard-working. Yeah, that's not the point, though. The point is he's finer. We're all sitting here hating on this guy. Stevie's bodied a nice guy, too. Yeah, that's not the point, though. The point is, he's finer. We're all sitting here hating on this guy. Stevie's bodied the fuck up, too. This guy's probably bodied up. Nobody knows. Stevie's bodied the fuck up. Stevie has a six-pack and a big dick.

Dude, if he shaved, though, they'd look exactly the same. No. He's hotter. Gabby, who's hotter? Her boyfriend. Yeah, way up. What do you think about that man on the far left though? Now what about this What about this

alcoholic church pastor on the left? Can we scroll over to him a little? What do you think of that man right there? Yeah Jay almost looks trans in that picture. No, he looks like... Jay looks like David Blaine if he's always on a bulking face.

That's his brother. Yeah, okay. That's my older brother's brother. God bless him. Awesome, my man. R.I.P. also. Awesome, my man. Great guy.

Great guy. All right. What did Stevie Blue have to say, though? Let's see. Brendan, Theo, what's up? Derek, also known as Big Dick Rick, coming out of Columbus, Ohio. He's also a big dick. Wanted to just say, forget them poop stain.

What can brown do for you? And them purple people eaters, FedEx. When they both go home at night, what can brown do for you and then purple people eaters fedex when they both go home at night what do they do check their mailbox so who's the real mvp all right hats off for you guys wanted to know debated stocking stuffers we still i got two young kids you know six and eight. Wanted to know if, you know, getting a little surprise in your stocking in the morning is an old thing of the past or something that kids still enjoy today.

Brendan, I know you got a couple of young kids. Theo, you look like you probably touch a couple. So give me a shout. Let me peace love y'all you gotta stop them candy man candy and like little trinkets and shit they love it i'll tell you what's exhausting as a parent is that elf on a shelf every night you gotta mix it up get creative with it what the fuck is i forgot where i put it he's like where they at like fucking ct i don't know where i put it. He's like, where are they at? I'm like, fucking CT. I don't know where I put them this morning. We found them in a tree outside. Yeah. We found them in the shower. Yeah. I think

stocking stuff is important. I think we always have to get our stocking first. Like our Christmas tradition was we'd have to get our stocking first, get in there. Hopefully they had some Reese's little peanut butter cups in there. But the gold ones. The gold ones, yeah. The little ones. Yes, sir. The gold ones yeah yeah little ones yes sir yes

gold red green ones yep yep and then after that we would do gifts uh and i don't know if i don't remember if we did them one at a time or if we just did them like just royal rumble style i don't like royal rumble but i don't either my brother allows royal rumble at his house dude and it's chaos and then everyone, I like it. You give that person the attention. It's tough on the person because when it comes to me, it's like, oh, fuck yeah, man. That sweater's cool. You got to act like the gift is dope.

The other thing that you got to think about too when you have kids, did your parents tell you that was from Santa? Yeah. I said Santa on it. I know. My girl once put Santa. I'm like, fuck Santa. You know how many dick jokes I had to tell to buy this fucking remote control car? Santa on the thing.

Well, it's half her Santa, half her dad and mom, dude. The little dude has to recognize. That's fine. But I think you can't not have no Santa. No, we have Santa, and we're still playing the Santa thing. But he's getting savvy to it because he's like, hold on. He's getting savvy because he's watching them Rick and Morty. Rick and Morty blows up Santa, by the way.

Oh, they do? Yeah, they blow up Santa. Dude, he's watching, and he's watching probably, what else do you guys watch? Bad Santa. Yeah, America's Most Wanted. What else do you guys watch together? Yeah. Dateline.

Verse 48. What age did you guys believe in Santa until? I never remember believing in Santa. Theo still thinks it's real. But my kid, though, at four, started asking some pretty legit questions. He's like, hold on, Santa goes to all the houses? Yeah, he goes to the entire world.

I'm like, yep. He goes to all the houses. He goes, well, why wouldn't we just order gifts? And then because, you know, Amazon, he's like, why wouldn't the people from Amazon just drop the gifts off? Why is Santa doing all that? Dude, you're asking too many fucking questions.

Legit point. Sounds like he's got a future in logistics. Yeah, definitely. Sounds like he should handle our merch. Sounds like he could work for the Bluebirds right there. Yeah, I never believed in Santa. What was y'all's Christmas tradition growing up, Chappelle? Tradition?

Shit, I don't know. Did your white family didn't fucking get lit on Christmas yeah they always do I just I don't ask for gifts though I stopped asking for gifts don't ask for gifts they just give them to or no I yeah I'd say don't give me anything we found out on the patreon exclusive cats after dark that Chappelle hates Christmas he's a Scrooge yeah turns down invites from I turned on invites come over my house for Christmas, and it's lit as fuck. Christmas is great. First of all, you ain't going to point at me like that.

You know what I'm saying? I don't like your attitude on Christmas, dude. You're mad at Christmas because it was Christmas, so there has to be some sort of issue there growing up with Christmas why you don't like it. I mean, I just never thought it was like that cool of a thing. What do you mean, Chappelle? What do you mean?

I don't know. I feel like it's an imagination type thing, more of a like a, I don't know. So would you never get a tree? Yeah, my family does the shit. You're a great guy. Would you get one, though? But I'm just like, what did I get on? Would you get a tree, like personally, for your house?

You know what? Actually, I did make my roommate go get a tree. Hell yeah. It was because we ain't got nothing in the house. Your roommate is your girlfriend. Let me ask you this. You ever deep throat some eggnog? Or just drink it?

With Wild Turkey. Yeah. That's a Wild Turkey I did. Relapse on Christmas. I don't know. I just, you know, like, yeah, my family every year,

my family says the same shit every year. They go, we already know the answer, but you're invited. And I say no every time. You don't show up to your family Christmas party? No, they know.

You an asshole, man. You shut your ass up. You an asshole. Yeah, you shut up, dude. You don't like gingerbread cookies? Fuck no gingerbread cookies. What? I don't really like those.

You a Grinch, man. You a skateboarding Grinch. You would make the best Santa. You would make the best Santa. I've been Santa before. I sent you the video. Oh, he was Crip walking in Santa. I was Crip walking in Santa.

Dirty chimney, that whole thing. You want me to send you it? Oh. But it just breaks my heart, Chappelle, that you don't like Santa Claus. Me too. That doesn't mean I'm a sad person. Well, I love Christmas. For one day of the year, you are.

One day of the year, I'm just sad as fuck. You're lucky you're not Jewish. What do I do? You just wake up? I just chill, yeah. I usually just hang out. Hang around the house. Feels miserable. You go lucky you're not Jewish. What do I do? You just wake up? I just chill, yeah. I usually just hang out, hang around the house. Feels miserable.

Look at Steve-O Bobby. Fucking Merry Christmas, I guess. That's my boyfriend. Segway. Segway. We know what cap came for Christmas. That's so fucking funny. Look at this.

There's a Bluetooth in his ear, too. Yeah, we have a Bluetooth. Yeah, why y'all going so hard on me about Christmas? I love you, man. Do you like your birthday? I don't like birthdays. I can relate to that, though, but Christmas. I don't like birthdays.

I love Christmas. I can relate. Oh, one New Year's I opened for you at the store. That was the last time I did something on New Year's. That was a good weekend. Yeah, that was fun. Was that last New Year's? No, it was like two years ago. I was there, too. That was the last time I did something on New Year's. That was a good weekend. Yeah, that was fun. Was that last New Year's? No, it was like two years ago.

I was there too. That was last year. Yeah, that was last year. Was that last year? That's how long 2020's been. No. No, it was not last year. Two years ago.

We were both for New Year's. Mm-hmm. Holy shite. We were at the store. Yeah, that's right. That was two freaking years ago. So this was a good appetizer. Send in your Christmas submissions.

Two weeks is our Christmas episode. I think we have, I don't know if I want to say it, but a special guest from the East Coast coming in on our Christmas episode. Can I say it? Go ahead.

Andrew Schultz, who's got a new Netflix special coming out. Yeah, he's going to be in the Culture Corner. Theo's going to be in town? Yeah, 17th? I think so. Yes, sir. If not, he'll guest host, but he's going to be in the culture corner. He's going to be in town. Yeah. 17th.

I think so. Yes, sir. If not, he'll guest host, but he's going to be in, he's going to be here. Yeah.

Yeah. So that'll be fun. We'll have a tree in our new stew that will be unveiled next week on episode 100 and send in a edition videos. You have to be local to LA or get yourself to LA 45 seconds or less, less why you should be in the culture corner. Why you have called, do be creative with it, 45 seconds or less why you should be in the culture corner. Why you have culture. Be creative with it. 45 seconds or less why you should be in the culture corner. All ethnicities.

White, black, Asian, Jewish, Muslims, or slims as you call them. Slims. Ethiopians. Ideally only send in if you're serious about getting yourself to LA. Non-Ethiopians. This can't be somebody that you gotta be able to go to the show. Yeah, we ain't flying you in from Australia.

We ain't flying you in from Fresno. We ain't flying you in from Manchester. Baby Unique drove herself. She did? Also, Thursday, our boy Little Brows, shout out Little Brows, part of the Cats family, his new album drops on Thursday on iTunes.

It's an all-Cats soundtrack. You got the Thick Boy Anthem. You got Theo's. Austin, a.k.a. Browser, a.k.a. Dama Thick. Cruz, I want to tell you guys to go get the King and the Sting, the album available December 10th. It's a great album. I wish I could do a rapper

promo video, but I'm actually at work right now. I'm doing a promo. I have an album coming out. Nobody care. They do care They should care cuz it's got Jay Hutch on there. Jay who? Jay Hutch. You wouldn't get it Mike stud jelly roll jack champ Jack Havoc Don Papa bear Earl Faustina Everyone's on there go check it out King of the sting the album available December 10th on all streaming platforms and I'll leave you with this King and the Sting, the album, available December 10th on all streaming platforms. And I'll leave you with this. Hey, thank you to Theo and thank you to Brendan and everyone else that I forgot to mention.

It was helping me to get through the pandemic. Was going through depression and feeling so distant. I put on some cats and I just started jogging and I just kept going when I felt like stopping. And I was going through it. Felt like a bad movie scene. Sending a rap to the King and the Sting. And the rest was history. Go get the album. I'm out.

Browser. I got it. He's so talented. He's so fucking rest was history. Go get the album. I'm out. Browser. I got it. He's so fucking talented, dude. We have an album coming out. He's so fucking talented. That's awesome. Love that dude, man. Shop Records.

You don't fuck with Shop Records? Fuck y'all, man. I'm going to get that album, dude. That's my hair look. I didn't even look at it. Your hair looking great today. It looks good, yeah. It's on. Fl thank you sweet that's

it dog I'll be in Palm Beach end of the year bring it in with me and Chappelle and the crew end of the year Palm Beach Florida when Palm Beach improv December 29th through January 2nd wow really that's crazy dude I uh where I'll be i gotta um cat i gotta um i i'm doing a live show with uh in january so just stay tuned for i don't know the date but probably like the 14th or 15th or 16th also cats merch just dropped we got new fucking hoodies you can see me rocking it we got uh long sleeves uh short sleeves sweats sweats, hats. We got all. It's catsmerch.com. Anything else is fake shit.

Catsmerch.com. Holla. And I did want to say about Theo's live show, it's a live streaming online pay-per-view thing, not like in-person live show. So anybody, anywhere. Yeah, that was confusing. Yeah, you'd be able to get it anywhere around the world.

Anywhere they have internet, you can get it. And it's going to be great. We're doing some sketches for it. Yeah, you'd be able to get it anywhere around the world. Anywhere they have internet, you can get it. And it's going to be great. We're doing some sketches for it. It's going to be a lot of fun. It's going to be great. It's going to be a belated Christmas town extravaganza. Yeah.

That's it, man. Appreciate it. Praise God. Gabby, Gabby, you want to plug anything? Fuck, I don't have any shit coming up. I guess my Instagram. Follow her Instagram.

It'll be right below her. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Get ready for the creeps. Get ready for the creeps. What is your Instagram? Gabby Lammy. G-b-b-y-l-a-m-b-y wait say it again g-a-b-b-y-l-a-m-b-y no but say it like say all the letters at once when you like when you say it gabby lamby a lamby he's trying to get he's trying to get her to talk because it lives understand that it always comes back to the lips. That third B gets lost in the shuffle.

We already have that. That spot's taken. We already have that. I got to set lips on me as well. Yeah, you do. I got to set lips on me. You do. You do?

Yeah. Look at Chin's lips. Look at Chin trying to pat him out. Cat's got some lips too. legs and try to hide them live Chin won't you say something you haven't said anything the whole time a lot Gave us a history lesson. Oh, yeah, yeah. That's crazy. I'm going to leave now.

Yeah, we all are. Brasswell food. Brendan and Theo, fighter in weight. I got to go in and go hard in the paint. I do not think. I am in flow. Black rifle coffee, I'm ready to go. I need a sponsor.

I am a monster. About to open up with this at my concert. Flow is contagious. Browser outrageous. Thicker than girls' letter. Instagram famous. instagram famous damn hungry like i'm fresh off keto seeing red like andrew santino every song i hit like the great bambino brennan ate the queso and the quesoritos but everything's gonna be fine hate on me i do not mind deal looking like the type of dude that got a pack of matches in his pockets at all times They sliding into my DMs A couple of you tried but couldn't beat him

Quit playing like Nintendo DS You don't want to smoke like Joey Diaz Meaning y'all edible Just got my eyebrows threaded and I'm feeling incredible Brennan's son hit me up He said it's too loud in the club Can you pick me up? King and the sting

King and the sting King and the sting We sting King and the sting King and the sting, king in the sting, bee sting rat king King in the sting, king in the sting, got the bees in the trap, got the cheese on a string King in the sting, king in the sting, king in the sting, bee sting rat king King in the sting, King and the sting. Got the bees in a trap.

Got the cheese on a string.