The Golden Hour - Goodbye Twitter World | The Golden Hour #76 w/ Brendan Schaub, Erik Griffin & Chris D'Elia

Episode Date: April 19, 2024

Bryan Callen crashes the show and the guys talk Chris' new deep voice without being sick, Erik's big brother from Big Brother's of America, O.J. Simpson news, all things Australia, Tim Burton movies, conjoined twins Abby and Brittany and much more! Get two extra episodes every month at https://patreon.com/thegoldenhourpodcast

We're friends that laugh, we're friends that shout Sometimes we don't know what we're talking about But that won't stop us Nothing can stop us Ooh, yeah It's like a show you used to love Just rebranded enough It's stronger, better, bigger power

Cause it is the Golden Hour It's the Golden Hour Oh, I gotta tell you something I did. You know how you're going through people's stories? You're just looking at stories on Instagram? Yeah. So I hit a friend of mine's story and it looks like a flyer.

Okay. Alright. It looks like a flyer to a music festival or something. Yeah. I wish I had the picture of it. Alright. So I say, oh, that looks fun. Then they write back, oh, what part? And I go, well, it looks like there's horses or whatever. Yeah. And they go, this is a

memorial for someone that died. No. Yeah, dude. Now, listen. My thing is like, okay. Because you know what? I realized what I was doing was this. Oh, my.

You know how you walk by someone and go like this? Hey, man. Yeah, yeah, yeah. How you doing? And I don't really care. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. This is exactly what that was. Yeah.

But my thing also. Don't make a flyer for like that bro well yeah chris it was colorful yeah it had like you know all this stuff i was like it a memorial flyer what part it should be real simple yeah it should be real simple and i still put it on me but still yeah ultimately it's ultimately it's you, but still. Yeah, right? Yeah, yeah, 100%. There's some bad flyers out there. I saw, yeah, there's some bad flyers, too many words. You're not going to read them all.

Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know what's going on with my voice. I got to be honest. I woke up, well, I woke up Sunday, Saturday, and hey, have a seat, blood. Have a seat, blood. What's wrong with your blood? I just had a bunch of mucus all settled down there in my throat, my chest.

Daddy's getting sick? No, no, no. It's passed. I don't think so. No, no. Well, I just saw you on Saturday. Yeah, I know. That's when I started feeling like mucusy.

But I worked out yesterday. I'm good. I don't feel bad yes but no i i i i don't i don't feel sick i just feel mucousy it's weird i don't know i'm the man i'll figure it out you know what i mean you sound like the the guy not paul giamatti but the other guy from that movie sideways i sound crazy thomas hayden church yeah what a what a weird reference thing to say to anyone even if they sound like him really he's the man yeah no no no he's a good actor but it's just so the sandman spider-man too hey i know that but i'm just saying it's so weird to say i do kind of sound like him huh yeah that's so weird right there but why don't i reference right but right there. But why don't I... It's a weird reference, right? But why don't I... Why am I not, like, sick, though? Maybe you are.

You look sick. Well, when I'm sick, everybody knows. I tell motherfuckers. I don't hide it. I think we know. This doesn't sound... I don't... Do you still have mucus?

Oh, yeah. Then you're sick! You know what it could be? It could be his It's allergies. Well, that's the other thing I was thinking, but I don't think it is. I think I'm sick. Yeah, you're sick. Yeah.

You can't, like, you're trying to talk yourself out of being sick. I do that sometimes. You wake up with, like, you know, your eyes are bloodshot and there's mucus coming out of your nose. This is what Chris sounds like right now. You're fine. Let's see. You can't, especially when you're from Texas now you're wearing cowboy boots these are actually snake boots that's funny just like these

are actually snake boots snakes don't have feet that's the kind of humor we're getting today last time I was sick with that Atlantaanta clip popped off so you gotta we gotta be careful what veil racist things yeah you're gonna say today asians indians who knows watch out when oj died chris texted me he's like oh dude i'm so happy what yeah dude oh no i didn't yeah you did no i didn't you get the good news show receipts bro that's a weird thing right the weirdest when someone like that dies and then everybody is i think about it too much when people say good riddance and like oh it's about time enjoy hell you're like jesus it's just weird what i didn't know really until kind of recently is that your voice though uh i you know is that is that black people know he did it What I didn't know really until kind of recently is that- Change your voice though.

Is that black people know he did it, but they didn't care and they were still like, yeah, hell yeah. It was payback for the- I didn't know. Yeah, yeah. It was payback for Rodney King. I didn't really technically know that. You didn't know that? Well, no.

I was 12 and then I cut it for- Then I forgot about it. Did they turn it on when you're in school? They turned the chase on in high school? Yeah, yeah, they did. They turned the verdict on during school? They did. Yeah, they did. They turned the verdict on during school? They did, yeah. They did.

How wild is that? It's so wild. You know, you guys know I have a big brother from Big Brothers of America? Yeah, yeah. You still do? Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's still around.

We didn't stop. Yeah, he's 60. Since I was seven, he's been in my life. Is he 80 now? Maybe. Yeah, he must be. Yeah, he's an older dude. You guys go to the movies and stuff still?

No, i haven't because he lives in he doesn't need to fucking make sure he goes the right way now he's good you never know the guy eric make sure you're on the right path he could be one of those guys like i make a commitment anyways he i don't see toy story in the day out when the rodney king yeah beating is he black your guy no no and he was shocked i remember him being like like he didn't believe like when people say the police beat black people right he was one of these people was like oh that doesn't happen yeah he didn't believe it at all yeah so when he saw that they say ai then he actually he he was so he went to the trials he was so like into it oh i would have went to the trials i still going i go to oj's murder sites is that weird yeah no we know you do dude you're you're a fucking you are weird

but no i would go to his brentwood estate to see that shit they didn't tear it down or anything right they teared down yeah they teared down where uh nicole was killed well it's still there but the address is different but they teared that no i'm saying his house is still there yeah that's crazy brentwood i wonder like there was not he had cancer we no one knew right i wonder if where they teared that. No, I'm saying his. His house is still there. Yeah, that's crazy. In Brentwood. I wonder, like, there was not, he had cancer where no one knew. Right.

I wonder if, okay, if he did it. Stupid. Okay, say he did it, where everybody thinks he did it. Right. Why wouldn't he just say something?

That's what I said. There's a few reasons. But you know, everyone that visited him in the hospital, they had to sign an NDA because apparently he did say something. But we don't know if it's about the murder, but he made everybody sign NDA. How do you know, everyone that visited him in the hospital, they had to sign an NDA because apparently he did say something.

But we don't know if it's about the murder, but he made everybody sign NDA. How do you know? How do you know that? It's what his family and friends say. I don't know. If you sign an NDA, you can't say I signed an NDA because that's part of it, right? Yeah. All I am saying is.

Maybe one of the nurses leaked it. They say, did you sign an NDA? Look at this. Look at this. Oh, weird. The final days, friends, family, and medical staffers were forced to sign NDA's reports. Weird. Oh, yeah.

The media says this, so we know it's true. What ground? Oh, New York Post. Yeah, cool. But it's all over. I don't know. TMZ. I get it.

And then the person in charge of his estate is trying to fight. So no money goes to Nicole's family. Dirty stuff. He may think he didn't do it. No, he knows he did it. No, at this point, he may have convinced himself he didn't do it. Oh, I don't think so. Could be one of the reasons he died.

Because all the stress and anxiety from murdering two people. I've been watching him on Twitter. I don't think he had any anxiety about that. Yeah, but he does look friendly on there. He's losing his mind. You never can tell anyone. You can't judge a person because of their fucking Twitter or Instagram. But there's so many videos, though.

Yeah. I'm not talking about the words he would say. I know, I know. He would only post videos. Hello, Twitter world. I know, I know. Hello, I know. No, I know. He would only post videos. Hello, Twitter world. I know, I know. Hello, Twitter world. And then he would say, he was like, when Karen Baskins killed that gal,

I don't know what everybody's asking me advice for. Right, right, right. Remember that? Yeah. He's wild. But the thing about it is he was like, it really showed his age that he was like, you know, doing videos like that. Do it on Instagram, Doug.

No, but it reminds me of my stepfather when he texts. Yeah. He signs his name at the end. Oh, that's great. That is an old. So I send a picture of Wolf to him, and he'll be like, oh, that's a great picture. Grandma and Grandpa.

You know what I mean? Yeah. I'm like, Mike, I know. Well, that's funny to do that. I'm like, Mike Mike I know it's you like sometimes you get those and you're like like Rob Schneider

texted me the other day and he wrote Rob Schneider I have his number but then I was like that's funny he wrote that but then I was like maybe he doesn't know I stored his number

that's fine but if he keeps doing it then you got an issue I wonder if he'll keep doing it like if you respond to him and you're like hey I know it's you but if he's still like

you know hey man what's up Rob Schneider just an old man is it automatic on some people? No, that's an old man thing. Email's automatic. That's an old man thing.

You should start doing that, bro. I would appreciate it. That'd be dope. No, but I'm into technology, so I'm not going to be an idiot. People wouldn't know

your fucking bullshit. I'm not going to be an idiot. You know what I mean? I'll do it. I'll write Eric Griffin afterwards for money. How confusing that'd be. What?

I was asking people this. What if OJ didn't do it? We just treat him like shit all his life. That's crazy. It is weird, though, that everyone just collectively decided he's guilty, but also it's like we're still like, ah, that's OJ. You know what I mean? Like he's on social media.

We're like, oh, look, he's crazy. Bro, if you murdered two people. But society gives certain people free passes. Like Mike Tyson, everyone's cool. Like he's the golden child now. It's like, you know, he went to prison for seven years, convicted by a court of law here we go can i talk now yeah oj went to trial and was found not guilty right it's not that simple and when

that happens we move on but the thing that's different about this is in the civil trial he was found guilty so that's what makes it like got it that's the thing that makes it where we go yeah you might be right about that hold on a second but like if you go to trial and you're found not guilty right okay that's our system you move on with our lives oh i disagree because before that the rot white the uh riots, when those cops were found innocent, then they rioted, and then that was the butterfly effect to the OJ case. Yeah, but the difference being is we have videos of the cops, like in the Rodney King beating. There's a video of the cops beating him for 13 minutes. That's crazy.

So then they go to trial, and then they're found innocent or whatever. Then we're just kind of like, well, we don't know all the facts, but we see that. That's when we're like, wait, what the hell's going on? But in most cases, though. Do you know much about Rodney King? Not too much. I mean, I know a little bit about it. I mean, it's insane.

It's like he's vibing. No, no. No, these are facts. I know. I'm kidding. Yeah, look it up. We say we're vibing. Yeah, I'm vibing. So it's just saying it's like he's vibing. No, no, these are facts. I know, I'm kidding. Yeah, look it up. We say we're vibing. Yeah,

I'm vibing. So it's just whatever. Vibing with facts, you know. Whatever it is. Hey, hey, Callan.

Is that Callan? I don't know, it's such an old arm. Oh, there he is. You know what I just realized? You have a little kid hand. You have a boy hand.

No, I don't. And frankly, I could have played piano. I thought it was an old. That's what I just realized? You have a little kid hand. You have a boy hand. No, I don't. And frankly, I could have played piano. I thought it was an old... That's what you go to? Piano? All bullshit aside, I thought it was a small midget. Old midget putting his hand like this.

Dude, that's so offensive. Oh, shut up. Yeah, shut up. How are you guys doing? Everything all right? Everything's fine. But you know what I love about your outfit? You still wear a wife beater underneath your shirt.

Yeah, because you never know. No, you never know when you're going to need to be in a play and do a rehearsal. In A Streetcar Named Desire? It's my favorite play. It's my favorite play. I also like to keep things under wraps. It keeps me calm. It doesn't get me to act out or get crazy.

Right, okay, sure. Put that in quotes, man. Yeah. Because you guys have never seen me fucking go off. Yeah, okay, sure. Put that in quotes, man. Because you guys have never seen me fucking go off. Yeah, I know, and you've been talking about it for a while, so I wonder. Yeah, since I met him. I swear to God you're all in trouble. Hey, how about how I sound?

It's cool, right? Yeah, you got a cold? Nah, I don't know. We're still deciding. We might be allergies. No, we decided. You're sick. I think you might be allergies. I think I'm alright. I survive a lot. Or he slept for 12 hours. No,'t i wish i did oh yeah yeah isn't that interesting that's great we have good conversations so far that's tell me do me a favor right now on the spot tell me one thing i don't know. Just one fucking thing.

Okay, okay, okay. Go ahead. You know a queen bee? A queen bee? Yep. You know if it dies? Yeah. All the other bees are fucked?

I fucking know that. All right, well, I don't know. Oh, my God. Give me one more thing. I don't know, dude. Anything else. Just tell me something I don't know. All right, queen.

Just for once, tell me something substantive that I can take. Queen bee. No, you know a lot. Do tell me something substantive that I can take from you. Queen B. No, you know a lot. Do you know any of her songs? Yeah. Oh. Oh, shit, man. Yeah.

You know what that is? Got him. No, no, no, don't. No, no, no. Sorry. Oh, dude. What? We didn't say anything.

Tell me one other thing. Okay. Oh. God damn your voice. Okay. Is it really that bad? Fuck. I hate that. oh. Goddamn your voice. Okay. Is it really that bad? Fuck, I hate that. I got two shows this weekend.

Crazy. I would promote them, but they're so... And, and, and, and, and, uh... Where are they? I thought you were going to come to my show. That's this weekend? Yeah, this weekend. Oh, I thought that's two weekends.

Friday, Saturday. Fuck. Uh, I'm going to be in Australia. I announced Australia tour dude Australia chrislea.com we're going to Australia so many different places

do your Australian accent I bet it's oh is it going oh that's fucking crazy mate right what's that car we only got him in Australia

not in America not in America man that's Kmart as fuck yeah hey hey alright guys are you gonna do the pod with Sam and talk about OJ That's Kmart as fuck, huh? Yeah. Hey, hey, hey. All right, guys.

Are you going to do the pod with Sam and talk about OJ? No. Okay. I'm interviewing the guy who created Whistlepig, Raj Bhakta, and has created his own university. Riveting. River Shaker, yeah. Chris, universities are institutions of higher learning, right,

where you go beyond high school. I know, man. Okay? So we're not talking about social studies. I went to a learning, right? Where you go beyond high school. I know, man. Okay? So we're not talking about social studies. I went to college, bro. Did you? For a year. Oh, God.

I dropped out during the year, to be honest. Right. You decided law school wasn't for you? I did fine. Okay. How about that, dude? I'm sure. I asked him what book he'd read.

He goes, John Grisham. It was the same book he told me five years ago. The Client. The Client. The Client. Because I keep reading it. Yeah, and I said to him one time, I said, you've got to read. This is like eight years ago. He goes, I know, dude, but it's so hard.

It's just TV. B, do you think you're – It's just TV. They're just our phones. At least, guys, between the four of us in general everyday we are really making a serious cultural impact huh I mean I don't know I've come up with some sayings and phrases

that people use in the world oh man man dude you can barely keep your head up look at how your neck doesn't even have any strength anymore you're so appalled at yourself he's sick so stupid Keep your head up. Look at how your neck doesn't even have any strength anymore. You're so appalled at yourself. He's sick. So stupid.

This is an homage to 10-Minute Podcast. One of the originals. Smith and Sasso. Oh, man. We created the genre, man. We created the genre. I told Sasso that I sent Sasso a picture of my baby when he was born. And Sasso goes, oh, my God, congrats, man. Big hug to Danny.

And we're going to find the fucker that did this to her. Oh, that's hilarious. I was like, you motherfucker. That's so funny. Yeah. Always funny. Will's the best. Hey, fucking Brennan, talk about it at UFC.

It's not really a slam, Brian. Hey, great years. UFC. That's not really a slam, Brian. Hey, great years. That's not really a slam, Brian. My wife's lifting football. You got your buddy behind you. Are you guys going to a disco? That's great. All right, cool.

Was that Danny Terrio? He's a biased stylist. A car wash. You want him turned into a car wash? If I say the word, he'll turn into a fucking car wash. All right, don't say the word. I got a fucking powerful friend. All right, all right.

God damn it. You go to Miami Vice Convention? Yeah. What was that guy? Brian's going to jack that guy off with that right now. And I will bet anybody any amount of money he's going to dinner with him tonight. Oh, that's so funny. I will guarantee it.

That's so funny. When I walked in, I heard. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. My voice is gone. My voice is gone. Oh, man. But if I sung a real singer-songwriter type... It'd be like a Miss Biggie.

But if I did a singer-songwriter type thing, it'd probably be pretty cool. Like if I did some country with like a fucking... I watched a man die. Oh, look at that. Thomas Hayden Church sings the blues. Dude. I liked it. Have you been watching American Idol?

Yeah, I'm off of it. I don't like it this year. Bro. They're not good. I'm out. Wait, I record it, and then I go like this. I listen. Fast forward, you people.

I hear like 30 seconds of the song, and I'm like, nope, don't like this person. It's also three hours long. Sunday night was three hours long. That is two hours and 45 minutes too long. Come sit your ass down. We have to hear about the lamb and all the dumb movies you like. You're going to listen to American Idol talk. I went to

a theater finally. I took my youngest to Godzilla. Oh, the new one. Oh, did that come out? Yeah. It's pretty good. Probably the best out of the three. I'll be at the Desert Ridge Improv this weekend and I'm going to go watch it. Probably the best out of the three. I'll be at the Desert Ridge Improv this weekend, and I'm going to go check out that movie while I'm there.

It's good. My son wore a Godzilla mask the entire time. You what? Desert Ridge Improv. Come check me out. Where's that at? I can't wait to go to Australia. It's outside of Phoenix.

It's outside of Phoenix. All right. I can't wait to go to Australia. You did Australia, right? Yeah, it's great. Did you? wait to go to Australia. You did Australia, right? Yeah, it's great. Did you? I've been to Australia.

Chin came with me. I know. It wasn't for me, but I did go and I performed. Then Eric Andre was there and I jumped on his show. I was shocked at how many, not that I care, but I was shocked at how many Asians are in Australia. Yeah, because it's the other way. It's basically they're Las Vegas. Or Atlanta for black people. I didn't know Australia was like theirs.

You know what I'm saying? You got it, though. It's like Montana for whites. You know what I'm saying? All right, good. Asians go to, see, I crossed all. Asians go to Australia. Do more races.

Yeah. And that's how I learned the difference between so many different Asian cultures. Because I was like, man, there's a lot of Chinese people. Jim was like, that's not Chinese. He did good people. Jim's like this, not you did good. He did good Korean by the end of it. Expert Chinese by the end of it. Asian you buy the end of it.

You're Asian, dude. Hawaii to Hawaii is great. When you go to Hawaii, a lot of Asians. Not like I wait for Australia. No, I've been Australia. Oh, I have nothing after that. I've been and I'm excited. They call seafood like crabs and shrimp bugs. Oh yeah, they Australia. Oh. I have nothing to offer you then. I've been. You know what they call seafood, like crabs and shrimp?

Bugs. Oh, yeah, they do, right. It makes me feel sick. It's disgusting. On the menu, it's like bugs and grill. You're like, ugh. Every, I say this, and it's true. I don't know if it still holds up, but every cup of coffee I had in Australia was better than any cup of coffee I had in America.

Also, they're better looking people. Oh, and find someone in Australia that doesn't have tattoos. You can't. They all have tattoos. And they're all very attractive. Even the koalas. You're really pushing this attractive thing.

They have chlamydia though. You know that? The koalas? Yeah. Every koala has chlamydia. So don't fuck them. I'm not vibing don't fuck them in the mouth it's only on their it's on their wet noses they do look it up

they have chlamydia that's crazy every single one when i was in australia my friend had a hamburger we walked outside a hamburger wow i know where this is going literally wow three birds attacked him that's hilarious it was it was it was it was crazy free birds uh free free birds he's talking about chicks oh what you doing ladies i'm trying to eat my burger what's going on oh my god ladies hold on these are jokes you're getting i'm sick bro oh what you're doing that's the lettuce too come on i like to eat something of this well i guess he got me fries. Oh, another bird. What is this lifestyle that are rich and famous

all of a sudden? Oh, fuck for fuck's sake. At least I got my special sauce. Oh, come on, Diane. How come there's nobody named Diane anymore? Gotta get that back. Dude, when I was a kid.

There's not, huh? Yeah, isn't that crazy? New Jersey, smoker. When I was a kid, There's not, huh? Yeah, isn't that crazy? New Jersey, smoker. When I was a kid, there were two twins, Diane and. Diane? Linda and Diane. That's what they were. Linda and Diane?

Linda and Diane. And everyone loved them. Did they become first ladies? No, they. They became Karen's. They were really cool, though. I really liked them. Really?

Yeah, they were really cool. You don't see a lot of twins either these days either. Oh, I do. Bro, I see twins. Never. Man. Jason Collins came with me to feature and Enrique, my tour manager,

is my tour manager. They're both twins. I'm like, I'm hanging out with two evil twins. I don't trust twins, man. That's crazy. Yeah, twins and redheads is the devil's work. I don't like it. Twin redheads, bro? It ain's crazy. Twins and redheads is the devil's work. I don't like it.

Twin redheads, bro? It ain't right. Twins and redheads is the devil's work. No, twin redheads. That's crazy. It ain't right. It ain't right.

Actually, the gym I go to, there's a couple of twin redheads. Really? Really? Well, that's the thing, though. Guys or? Girls.

All right. I'm not going to ask you if they were attractive, but you would have said they were if they were they were you would have started with that um yeah yeah um um gym um well that doesn't mean they're attractive no no i know but that well no but they could have got like the free 30-day trial you know i'm talking about those people well if one of you go the other one has to go the The twins. Dude, I saw the funniest meme. I saw the funniest meme. This dude said they're conjoined twins. The fat twins.

They're conjoined twins. He said, you think you're having a bad day. These guys are conjoined twins, and one of them's gay. They share the same asshole. I saw that, yeah. Yeah, yeah. One of them's gay. That's real.

God, that's fucked up. That's real. That's not even vibes. That's real. That's real. Well, either's fucked up. That's real. That's not even vibes. That's real. That's real. Well, either way. Okay, what's worse? You're sharing the same asshole.

Okay. Okay. Or their heads are like this, and this one's just. I don't have separate assholes, separate heads. But Chris. But Chris. No, don't say, but Chris. Because you're like this, though.

Because you have to be like, are you almost done? But Chris, but Chris. No, don't say, but Chris. Chris, you're like this, though. Because you have to like, you know, you have to be like, are you almost done? Dude, you get the spit coming out of your face. Yeah. And then what if he like, you know, he's like. Come on. My cheek. Come on. Everybody's reading.

Come on, guys. Dude, I was doing. Nintendo Switch. Oh, come on. On my cheek. Come on. Everybody's reading. Come on, guys. Dude, I was doing- Nintendo Switch. It's so funny that I was doing jokes about these girls on my half hour on Comedy Central before. And now they went revival again. And now they're back.

Oh, they were a thing back then? Oh, yeah. Yeah. It says, because everyone was asking, this is the first thing I thought about. Yes, I have sex with my husband. Yes, I go down on him. Yes, my sister Brittany is there. Well, we know she's there.

He's not married to both of them? No. Oh, I thought- Oh, what a waste of time. No, but the thing is, first of all, this guy Brittany is there. Hold on. She's there. He's not married to both of them? No. Oh, I thought. Oh, what a waste of time. Yes, my sister. First of all, this guy's a freak. Okay? Like, there's no way.

Because this is what. He's only married to one. So that means he has to lock eyes with his wife, right? But you know in the middle of it, he's looking over to see if the other one's enjoying it like she what is the other one i'm supposed to act like she's not there dude he says yes my uh my sister she put yes my sister and i orgasm as one but when i sleep with my husband she's usually reading a book or listening to the fire and the kid so she just puts the pleasure out of her mind well she definitely she definitely puts the pleasure out of her mind. Well, she definitely puts the pleasure out of her mind if she's listening to Fight on the Kid.

Oh, got him. He'll be at Australia tour. Australia coming in. Desert Ridge Improv this weekend. I'm joking. I like the podcast. You know I do. I go on it. I like it. No, no, no. Listen. This is all bullshit. It has to be, right?

I'm sorry. No way. Yeah. So you're like, what, I'm reading Harry Potter? No. Just like this? She said she listens to the- No, you're reading like this.

Yeah, that's what I'm saying. She's over here like, and then Harry was like, oh, God. It only made sense if he took out the bowl. What if the one sister, she's not into it right now. Is that sexual assault? Like this. Sorry, my sister's fucking. She can't play time during that time.

It's like, listen, I don't care who you are. When you see this, the absolute, I don't care who you are, the first thing you think of is, how are they having sex? It's just. Well, when you see the guy with them, yeah, for sure. Oh, I was thinking of, yeah. What is your first thing when you see this picture? Both of them sucking.

That picture, yes. How's it work? That's what I'm saying. Not sex. I'm thinking, you know. No, no, no. If I just saw the two of them out, like the girls, that would not be my first thought.

Right. This, 100%. That's what I'm saying. When you find out they got married, you're just like. Yeah. It's like any. Look, if you see a couple. Yeah. If you're a couple. Like, it's like any, look, if you see a couple. Yeah.

If you're like, let's say you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Chris and his wife. And Chris says, well, we're trying to have a baby. Yeah. The moment they say that, boom. And it looks awesome too. Her and I, I go real slow.

This is a whole new thing. I thought they were both in on it. No, I thought both of them were down. Three of them are freaks. They are. They are. It's all... What are we talking about right now?

Also, which one is it? Is it the one on the far left or the one in the middle? The one in the middle is fucked. That's funny. Because it's like one's close to him, but the other one's got the bouquet and more in the picture. No, that's actually not a great picture of them. Oh, yeah?

There's better. Yeah, there actually is. Because there's clearly a cuter one. Dude, there's... But you can't tell in this picture. That's hilarious. Dude, they should have put, you know, the green screen guy thing on one of them.

Like the green screen. Oh, that'd be dope. And just take her out. Come on, that's terrible. I mean... Oh, there's four of them? Now I'd be down for that. Ah, you're a freak.

Wow. Hey, how about props to them, huh? Yeah. Yeah, doing it, man. Getting through it. That a freak. Wow. Hey, how about props to them, huh? Yeah. Yeah, doing it, man. Getting through it. That's great. Wow. I mean, that's got to be a nightmare.

You'd think. Now, I don't know anything about this, but you'd think. Maybe you and Jay. Nightmare. Nightmare. These two might be like this all the time. Fuck you. Fuck you.

Yeah, just like. Body shots. Oh. Oh. Can't get them in. Can't get them in. They used to have some really funny jokes about Jager. Can't get them in an arm bar wasn't being like rude or anything but you get them in an arm bar you break your own arm you know what i mean crazy um the ish and they have a show on tlc because if you say oh they do if you're a bitch i mean yeah oh yeah it takes one to know one don't we all like you know what i? If you're a conjoined twin, you're a bitch. I mean, you're- Yeah. Oh, yeah. It takes one to know one. Don't we all-

You know what I mean? You're connected. But they have done successful surgery separating conjoined twins, right? You can't- Not with this, Brendan. They're going to be like fucking Krang. It's the ones that have the head. Come on.

You had the Tom and Satan church. You had to bring it back. The ones where their heads are connected. They can sometimes do that. Dude, that's them. Because they share. The ones that were like connected. Is that shitty? Is that shitty?

Oh, my God. That'd be you and your brother. Yeah. It depends, right? Because if they share like a heart, the liver and shit, if it's just the liver and some of the other stuff, they can. They share dick, dude. Oh, yeah.

That's crazy. I mean, sisters share dick sometimes. How about the basketball player, the twins? They played at UCLA. One of them is gay, like super flamboyant. And then one of them, you know, is doing his thing. And he said it's tough because, you know, he can't tell the difference. Oh.

How's that tough? Do they play basketball, both of them? can't tell the difference. Oh. How's that tough? Did they play basketball, both of them? They used to. Wow. So what happened? You remember the Collins? I mean, you know, they're there. Oh, not the O'Bannon's.

The O'Bannon's were ballers. I said UCLA. I'm probably lying. Vibing. The Collins. Oh. Oh, yeah. Collins?

I think so. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's right. I just was talking about this. Yeah, Oh, yeah. Collins? I think so. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's right. I just was talking about this. Yeah, that's them. Wow. Oh, that's hilarious. He's wearing a shirt that says, I'm the straight one.

That's good. Apparently, he's getting beat up. Oh, no. I made that up. Yeah. You just say shit, huh? Yeah. I'm good looking, dude.

Jason Collins. Yeah. I'm good looking, dude. Jason Collins. I saw a video of a guy talking to his girl over the phone and being like, what are you doing? I saw you on this thing. And it turns out that the girl had a twin sister. And they didn't know.

They were adopted. Oh, wow. What? And that's how they found out. Because the guy was like. Come on. Yeah. What? Yeah, guy was like come on yeah what yeah it was like a thing so then they all they got in contact that's a netflix doc you know have you seen the netflix doc those six they're like whatever them sicklets or whatever

and they didn't and then they all got spread out and then they think i might have started finding each other there's six of them bro brothers and sisters but it's crazy how they all sometimes like i've seen so I've seen something like that Yeah, that's on Netflix. It's crazy. How they'll be like they they they ended up being very similar like yeah It's like that shit's freaky. Yeah, there was that one about the two dudes that are the three dudes in Netflix Oh, and that might be the one you're talking about. I said six maybe it's not not Six seems like a lot. lot no i think there were three six is crazy i don't like there's one where it's like they did it as an experiment yeah yeah no no no that's that one oh that's called the nazi trials yeah you know they would take twins

and they'd have them separate rooms then like torture one to see if the other one felt it did you feel it no no. Schneiser. Yeah. I don't know, man. I'm at the point now, though, where I keep... Okay, can you remember... If you see a thumbnail for a movie or if it's on on Cinemax, you flip by it if you're still doing that. You still have Cinemax? No, but I'm just saying for everyone for our old head fans um can do you know if you've seen the movie or not always or are you like have i seen this oh every time i know no i i'm with you i see

a lot of movies so i'll be like which one is that or like right so that i i that i could do that up until like late 30s and now i i don't i don't remember anymore i'm like i'll even play a game with myself i think it's because i'll play a game where like as soon as it like you'll see and it's like the you know it doesn't show the title yet yeah it's getting going yeah yeah let's try and figure this that's not a fun game i have i just i don't feel like a photographic man it's not fun you always win every time who wins you all the time this. It's not fun. You always win? Every time. Who wins?

You all the time? Every time. It's not fun, bro. You need better competitors. Oh, I saw the fucking trailer for Beetlejuice Beetlejuice. Dude, I'm going to dress up. I think it's just one Beetlejuice. No.

No, no, no. Beetlejuice Beetlejuice. The second one's called that? Yeah. Beetlejuice Beetlejuice? Yep, twice. That's funny. It's the second one, right?

Fuck, man. No, no. I get it. I didn't know. I'm asking you there it is lit he looks so old but i'll take it yeah but he also that beetlejuice looks old he looks like brian kellen i don't i don't uh i don't if you say it twice will brian kellen come back oh god i don't i i don't i think beetlejuice is a fucking great movie i i don't care to see this I don't I think Beetlejuice

is a fucking great movie I don't care to see this zero desire to see this yeah weird oh you guys are hosts and I like Beetlejuice oh no you're hosts no I just don't care

Tim Burton Tim Burton doesn't miss I'm not saying he directed it name a movie oh my what's the one with anyone Matt Damon

Trash which one which one Tim Burton Matt Damon yeah man I don't know it they were like Good Will Hunting no he didn't do that one Which one? Tim Burton, Matt Damon? Yeah, man. I don't know it. Good Will Hunting.

No, he didn't do that one. No, I don't. Yeah. No, Matt Damon and Tim Burton never did a movie. I thought they did. No. We bought a zoo. Are you thinking it stuck on you?

No. That's the Farley Brothers. No, no, no. Great movie. Not even close. We bought a zoo. No. Not as bad a movie as you think. Mr. Mom.

You know what's great about streaming is that's what streaming does. There's a standard for a movie to be in the theater that I think is way – what do you think the gap is for like you have movies in the theater here. Where is streaming in terms of like that it's okay that it's not as good as this? No, it doesn't matter. It can be so far the other way, it doesn't matter. Yeah, right? Because there are movies on there.

I'm like, did my- Doesn't miss. Let's see. Dumbo. Okay, I'll give you Dumbo. Terrible. Other than that, doesn't fucking miss. Dark Shadows lit.

Terrible. Sweeney Todd, fantastic. Dark Shadows was terrible. Oh, no. Sweeney Todd was good.adows was terrible Oh no Sweeney Todd was good I haven't seen any of these Corpse Bride lit Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

Good Trash No Ed Wood got nominated For a bunch of stuff Sleepy Hollow Mars Attack Sleepy Hollow

Trash Oh no You're crazy bro Ed Wood Go Kill Yourself Bat Ram Returns Fantastic Horrible

Favorite one Mars Attack Classic I don't even know Kick it Kick it Planet of the Apes was good Mark Wahlberg Batman Returns. Fantastic. Horrible. Favorite one. Mars Attack. Classic. I don't even know. Kick it. Kick it. Planet of the Apes was good.

Mark Wahlberg. It was all right. I liked it. Hell yeah. It was all right. No, no. Was Mark Wahlberg in that? Edward Scissorhands. Chin.

My favorite movie. Edward Scissorhands. All time. What? Edward Scissorhands. Pee-wee's Big Adventure. Take my fucking money. He's dead.

So Pee-wee was his first movie? That's wild. I didn't know that. That is wild. Dumbo's tough. But the reason why is because it's like, isn't it like not a kid? It's sad. Yeah, you don't want to bring your kid.

Yeah. I see an elephant fly. I haven't seen that. Oh, yeah. I haven't seen that. I haven't seen a lot of those movies. Oh, wow. Been done seen by a happy man.

I have no desire to see that. And then there's also so much streaming. I don't, yeah. Because the thing is, you know you can just click on something and then just move to something else if you don't. Let me ask you this. You got a bunch of selections. Say you're on a plane or something like that. Do you ever

watch a movie... Because you're on a plane? No, no, no. That you've already seen? Every time. Never. Every time. See, I have a compulsion.

I do that. Me too. Every time. I have a... This is my thing, man. No, I don't do that. I will start... If I see Mission Impossible, the first one, and I start watching it.

Yeah. You're autistic. I'm in. Yeah. And now I got to watch it all. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Not me. You watch the whole catalog.

I have to watch all of them. It's a form of autism. I have a thing in my, maybe. I have a thing in my, I have movies on my iPad. So I have the Godfather series on my iPad. If I start it, I got to finish it. Hunger it hunger games twilight now where are you flying to harry potter no no but it'll be like it'll be like i'll stay on the plane even to vegas man it's crazy but i'll just i love series yeah i read books like that on the plane audio books or series i i just i gotta keep going i

don't know what it is terrible my thing is on a plane, whether it's podcast or a book or a movie, it has to be something I've already seen. Because I can go in and out. If I fall asleep, I know exactly what I'm watching. No, not me, bro. I watch new shit on the plane. Yeah, but I like to do that too. That's stupid.

I like to watch movies. I go, I would never pay for this. This is the reason why. Fucking stupid. But this is the reason why it's good to be, you can find the one movie that you would only watch because you're on a plane. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like you wouldn't even watch this at home.

No, no, no, no. Because you're not going to waste your time. You've got your family now. And if you're going to watch a movie at home, it's got to be a movie you really want to see. You know what I saw on the plane? This Korean movie I'm going to leave. home, there's got to be like, it's got to be a movie you really want to see. You know what I saw on the plane? This Korean movie, I'm going to leave. No, it's not.

It's, what's that? I don't do that on planes. Phantom Thread. I was like, this has got to be boring as fuck. Let me just see. Phantom Thread?

Yeah. It was with Daniel Day-Lewis. It's like a legit movie that's like very good, quote unquote. Like it's like, and I was like, this is going to be terrible. I'll just watch a little little bit of it to say so I know how bad it is so

watch I watch a whole fucking thing on the plane it's pretty good was it yeah Danny Day-Lewis is fucking amazing you know oh yeah I've seen Phantom Thread is it really boring it's one of those kind of movies though that if you talked it like you know who loves it Brian Kelly oh yeah he did like it he did like it's like a place very pretentious you'll be like a super movie head it's pretty pretentious but it's good because didn't daniel day-lowis just retire yeah but i start making shoes and shit no but that he's all that people would say that for 220 years it's like lizzo fake retired she like i'm quit But she was saying she had to come back and be like, no, what I meant was I quit caring about social media. Dude, I retweeted this, too.

She had a post. It was like Lizzo's way to get healthy for the summer. Two ways to get healthy for the summer. Insane. And, dude, I've been following it. I'm losing weight. I was going to say you look good. Yeah, dude.

It's the Lizzo diet. Really? What do you eat? Bananas've been following it. I'm losing weight. I was going to say, you look good. Yeah, dude. It's the Lizzo diet. Really? What do you eat? Bananas. That's it. Oh, that's racist. You didn't even mean to be racist. He didn't even mean to. No, it's not racist because she got in trouble for forcing her dancers to swallow bananas.

That's the reference, you racist fucks. None of that was real. No, I know. Come on. Remember to hydrate excessively and remember you can never be too extra mr belvedere here's three exercises to help you get that summer bod hello who is this block your ex she's just gonna lean into like you know i mean i would appreciate i appreciate this just lean into being fat you know yeah i like lean into it like yeah stop like stop being like oh this and that just be like i'm a big fat

i think that's a good pr move fat fucking drinking ass yeah barely get on the treadmill fat ass fat i like this version of air yeah i like this i'm saying like she just of Eric I like this She just is like fuck it People hate me People say stuff about me I'm just gonna be a fat That's awesome

That's a good PR move Quit skinny shaming us all the time Show you're in shape You fucking loser I thought she was gonna pull up a sandwich Three exercises to get the summer bod. Whatever, man. I don't know, man.

What sucks about this is that if she dies of a heart attack, it's going to be like this. Right. We're going to be like. They're going to try and hide it. No one's going to be like. They're going to try and hide it. It's going to be like the JFK assassination. It'll be back to the left.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sandwich. Back to the left. That's funny. I could have thought of that joke. It'll be like an Uber Eats guy on the fucking, on the lawn, right? It was Uber Eats.

It was the Uber Eats guy. Bassy Lowell? No, there was fucking fucking postmates was there too door dash was there it was like three deliveries you got anything for us nick yeah um did you make money this weekend nick oh yeah i had uh max round five wow plus 3300 how much you put on it 25 to win 800 damn good for you yeah and I had whaley Zhang first round sub that was that this group robbed but did well overall yeah incredible card I mean that video of you guys is so funny because

he's running around like a fucking crazy person as well you're just going I just why were you I wasn't mad I'm just like oh he got knocked the fuck out like I don't feel I feel weird I thought you got knocked the fuck out like I don't feel I feel weird I thought you bet on the fight and you were upset no I don't even know

who those guys are until last night yeah that guy hit that guy I don't know what happened there but he like it was like one second left

right yeah literally 2-1 it was going that was crazy oh my god oh my god! Oh my god! We're watching my stand up here.

Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh my god! That was insane. I don't really react like crazy.

When stuff like that happens, I'm all internal. With everything, you're never like here or here. You're always like this. That's how the ocean's out sometimes. You know? Yeah. I thought about that, but it's like... That's like mucus.

Wear your heart on your sleeve sometimes. That's one thing about Chris. He wears his heart on his sleeve. I don't think you're ever going to hear someone say that. Said by no one ever? Yeah. Said by frucking no one. Sorry I derailed you there, Nick.

It's okay. I won 3K from Brian. I called Max by decision, and then Alex first round knockout. Nice, nice. 3K. Yeah, I watched it at some bar in Sherman Oaks, and I had a bunch of money, like one of my biggest bets ever on Armand Saroukian. And then this group of 15 Armenian guys came in,

and they collectively had like 50 grand on them. So we made friends. That's dope. It was a good time. It would have sucked if you bet on Charles de la Vea. Those Armenians roll in. You're like, okay. That would have been not as fun.

This guy's back or what? He is back. I just was going to play this one as a reminder who he was. Absolutely dialed in. He's really blown up, Davis Clark. He's dialed in. I'm about to be absolutely dialed in going into this monthly meeting. I've been up since 4.30 a.m.

Energy's through the roof. Someone's got to drive the innovation and creativity to keep everyone's money safe. Hey, let's get after it today. I wish he would say giggity after because that's who he looks like. He is giggity. Have you seen this he looks like he is uh have you seen this no oh you haven't seen this no i don't follow him have you seen this i haven't seen oh wow all right yeah he ran the uh boston marathon i'll see everything i have for the people 256 i share my face like crazy i'm going after it all day, every day for the people. It's like crazy. I did hear that.

He shit his, that's real. Go to the, yeah, look at it. Well, that's blood, right? No, that's shit. That's disgusting. He's dialed in. And it was only a three-hour race. Under three hours he made it.

No, that's tough to do. You start the marathon. Yeah. You're running. Yeah. Everything's chill. Yeah. You're running yeah everything's chill yeah you're running yeah

and then you can't just no people shit you're there and you're like oh I gotta shit no people shit themselves on marathons all the time but but

but they don't post it on social media oh well and that's and that is insane that thing went litty though no but you have to post it at this point because

he has to everyone's got cameras and stuff and then it's just gonna be I agree look dude I love the guy. I think that dude's awesome. Shit your pants for filming. I don't give a fuck.

I wish he was my financial advisor. Guys that can shit his pants like that? He was for sure locked in. He's got to get your taxes done. He's like, I'm going to get it done. What happens? Don't worry. We're going to get him done.

That's the kind of guy you need, Chet. I know. What's that saying? Well, never mind. Shit your pants? Nope. Wait. No, I don't want to go because Eric's going to of guy you need, kid. I know. What's that saying? Well, nevermind. Shit your pants? Nope. Wait,

no, I don't want to go because Eric's like, well, yesterday. Yeah, yeah, yeah, he is. I'm shit my pants right now,

Eric. What are you talking about? Hold on a second. Wait, I had to go. I had to run. I would never shit my pants. That was his mile pace.

You know what I mean? What's that? That's fast. Under seven minute mile. That's rolling. Yeah, he's rolling. Dialed in. What did I do? I had to stop and rush somewhere I can't remember it was the other day you should you right I was it no I was in a I had

to shit like in a Walgreens or something which is like you're like David how about a hotel bathroom and then you you know I'm saying but it's like but when you're at a Walgreens you don't just have to worry about, do they have a bathroom? So now they have a bathroom. Now you have to go in there and be like, what kind of bathroom is this? You got to desanitize it? If you have the whole thing. And sometimes you just got to.

When I was a kid, I was at a 99 cent store with my mom. She had to shit and they wouldn't give her the keys to the bathroom. So she shit on the wall. You're telling me I can't tell a story, but you can tell a story about your mom shitting on a wall. Your mom shit on the wall? When you have to go, you have to go. Outside? Yeah.

Be great if she did it inside. Oh, no. Inside. Inside the 99 cent store. But outside the bathroom. On the wall. She did it in the store? Yeah.

And then she grabbed like a 99 cent shirt and just went. Yeah. I'll pay it. They're not 99 cents anymore, though. Oh, wow. There should have been. store gangster and then she grabbed like a 99 cent shirt and just went yeah i'll pay it they're not 99 cents anymore though oh wow there should have been um recalled what they're recalled now after that yeah so shout out to my mom used to be able to do shit like that yeah there's no cameras nothing and she'd be like i didn't do it prove it wow what year was it? Shit, I was probably eight. So was that in 83? So yeah, 19...

Oh, you know what? Speaking of proven shit, I just rented a car. And then I was wherever I was. And then I get this email. Hey, sorry to tell you, but there's damage and you owe this amount. Right? I wrote the guy back. I said, you need to show me some before yeah and

after pictures yeah so when you get that together get it sorted send me and then we'll talk of course you never heard from him again right haven't heard from him yeah yeah scam Wow we just rent cars from just people around or what yeah it wasn't Avis now is this guy give me guy. He gave me a deal. No, they have that app now. Craigslist Auto. Where you can get dope cars and regular people's cars. And they just pick you up at the airport. Yeah, but that's like, what are we talking about?

You can't just. Brian did it and just left the guy. I remember me and Brian were in Austin. He just, this random dude gave us like a fucking Tesla. And then Brian just left it somewhere. And you can do that? I guess. Wow. Wow, dude. Brian is just a different somewhere. And then you can do that? I guess. Wow, wow, dude, Brian is just a different kind of guy.

I would do that. I would honestly do that. Hey you guys, pick up the weight on the rest of this podcast. What else you had, Nick? This video is going viral from Tupac back in the day when he was 17. Everybody thinks he's got a little sugar in his tank.

Yeah, but that's only because he was raised by his mother. I don't want to hear it. He was raised for his mother. He was raised by his mother. His dad left. That's why. But what if he was gay? Oh, yeah, yeah.

Does it make him any less? Well, he was never a gangster. He was never hard. He was never a gangster. But does it make him any... Would you stop listening to music? I don't give a shit. You actually...

What does it say? The light's in the way. You actually don't need functional gay art. Okay, let's see, play it. It's okay, I guess 17 is all right. How do you think you're most like your mom? I'm most like my mom because I'm arrogant. Totally arrogant, I agree.

That's a gay man. Like at work, I can't hold a job. I just quit my job today actually. Because I wanted to come and do this. I can't hold a job. I just quit my job. Still slaps. Today, actually. Because I wanted to come and do this. And they wouldn't let me. God, I love that. And I felt like it was important. And it was more important than serving pizza.

And we had enough people. So I felt like since I'm an actor, they should understand. They should have let me do it. But they didn't. And it had a cold. So they were making me work in a freezer. And I really not wanted to be disrespected. And I felt like I was disrespected. You see this? Because I had a cold so they were making me work in a freezer and I'm really not one to be disrespected and I felt like I was just because I have to so no I've seen this I saw this

it's been out for a while I've seen everything yeah it's been out for a while I'm arrogant so when he told me I couldn't quit and we had all these customers I chose that time to jump on a soapbox grab my leather jacket light a cigarette in front of them smoke and leave. In the middle of a rush. Here's the thing, man. I don't know what the thing is. So what is it?

This actually is what the gay community needs. They need LeBron James to be gay. Right. Yeah. So if Tupac's gay, then it's kind of like, oh, okay. They need Otani just to be sucked and cocked. He's just gay as hell, but it's like, hey,

I'm the greatest basketball player ever. Or whatever. You know what I mean? Then we just kind of go, oh, so this doesn't matter. Because the fact that people still make a thing about that... What's the actual real thought process yeah so if you're that's just for clicks right everybody gay couldn't do anything right yeah and then it's like well see when you're gay you can't do this right but you're telling me one of the greatest

rappers ever could have possibly been that then what does it matter right right right well yeah sure i get that but i mean people just think it's a fucking sin and some of the discourses that like rap was built on like toxic masculinity and help like build that and then secretly behind all the what i'm saying is you can be gay and still be toxic math you know that's the thing though you could still be like... It's probably even worse. Yeah. They'd probably take it out on their assholes. Yeah. You're going to suck this dick. You just grab Chin's head. Yeah, yeah.

No, don't make it personal. I'm just saying, like, I don't know, you know, whatever. Yeah, I think it would help the movement for what they're trying to get done. But then also. He probably went extra hard because of that. That's why it would explain why after he did that movie, he turned into like that character. You know, they say that's why OJ had so much anger. He always had anger issues because his dad was gay.

Oh, really? Horrible anger issues. Yeah. His dad was like flamboyant gay. So why'd that make him mad? Because dad was gay. You know know back then I just feel like

Yeah really He was It's also Wasn't he like 17 When he did that interview? Yeah So it's like Oh you know what's cool?

You know what's really cool? What? You can show a video of me at 17 And I'm not gay I don't know bro You know when I was 17 You know as a 17 to now I've never done this.

I bet. You just did right there. When you're 17, you do some gay shit, you know? No, I don't. You're just like, I bet there's video of me out there somewhere, 16 years old, just like this. I bet there is. You know what I'm saying? You want him not to be gay so bad? No, no, no, no, no.

Bro, I think it'd be cool if he was, but I don't think he is. My point is, I don't think he is. He was raised by his mother. That's the thing. That was always... Wouldn't it be great if there was a secret Tupac album and it was just all like...

Gay stuff. It was like, you know, get dick! A love thing of fucking you, bro. I'm the bitch you pay! You know what I mean? He was just going in. But Eric was raised

by his mother. Yeah. I mean. So was Nick by grandma. That's going to be the new meme. We had big brothers, though.

That's going to be the new meme. Yeah. That's the new meme. Chris had big brothers, though. That's going to be the new meme. Yeah. That's the new meme. Chris Cohen. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know. But who's the guy who's come out as gay and is crushing it?

Well, actually, there's a bunch of NFL players now that are openly gay. Well, I wouldn't say a bunch. Hey, if there's one, Brendan. That's a bunch? That's a bunch. In a place like the one, Brendan. That's a bunch? That's a bunch. In a place like the NFL? There's gay NFL players? Remember the Sam guy before you?

It was like such a big deal? Now they're just kind of like whatever now. They just don't talk. Well, he's off the team. The NFL doesn't want them talking about it, but it's like, you know. That Sam guy was in for one season. He was a bad player. He was a bad player.

He shouldn't have even tried. What did he play? Tight end? Tight end. season. He was a bad player. He was a bad player. He shouldn't have even tried. What did he play? Tight end? I'm sick. That's what you get. Boy, mucus Chris, huh? No, there's a guy who's on the Raiders. Just like mucus.

Big white boy who was gay and then he got traded or he signed with the What did he play? Wide receiver? Lots of people thought it was... You get it? Because... Would you please... We have to disinfect this whole fucking area now.

What'd you say, Nick? Lots of people thought it was him with Jeffrey Starr or whatever. There was some... Oh, that's right. They thought it was Taylor LeJuan. I'm gay. I fucking smoke dicks all the time. We smoke at penises.

Remember when the guy texted? Oh, yeah, I remember that. People thought that was Carl Macias. Everybody tried to figure it out from the ears. That makes sense. Remember the thing? Remember the, remember the when the... Well, the guy obviously

it doesn't if that's like yellow black and yellow who's that who's that uh whiskey remember he said wait was it him oh no was it young doug he was like uh yeah we smoking penises look at have you seen it on twitter he said yeah we smoking penises every day that's hey hey hey hey homo not no homo we smoking penises no homo we smoking penises

in a club I don't know man I like that lyric that's that means you know blunts but it also means penises

that's what you get That's generic. That means, you know, blunts, but it also means penises. That's what you get. You farted. Who knows? And you're sick. It was real dainty. Yeah. That was like you going, hey.

Yeah. My fart was raised by my mother. So stupid. So dumb. All right, is this it? This guy had a thing about farting. Is he about to die, this guy? G'day, guys.

Watching your most recent podcast. I'll be honest, right? Discussing farting and what to do with them. Farting? My missus used to excuse herself, go to the toilet, and she'd get a bit of toilet paper on her anus and use it like a silencer to silence the farts. Use a pillow. So for the first three years of our relationship,

I thought, this chick doesn't fart. What? Turns out she rips them. But she was silencing them. That's funny. So she would just live with toilet paper in her butt or what? No, she would excuse herself when she had to fart, go to the bathroom. But you can do it without that.

Yeah, use the pillow, dude. I mean, everybody does that. Just fucking do it. You can just spread your cheeks. Yeah, but it's like a thing. There's ways to do it. Girls don't want to like... But just spread your cheeks and...

Fart. Yeah. Sometimes girls are like, you're never going to, you know... That's how I smoke vapes in airplane bathrooms. Smoke your penises? No. Take the toilet paper and... Oh, really?

Yeah. Wait, you do what? I smoke either weed or nicotine vape what's the what's the toilet paper do with it it masks smell smell does it actually help you can see the toilet paper it's also makes you see what's going into your lungs because it gets like brown oh god don't smoke that fucking shit i know dude smoke penises dude i i... Fuck, that's disgusting vaping. Ew, dude. Ew!

You don't do it anymore, do you? Yeah. Yeah, he does. Look at him. That guy's never given up vaping. Look at him. Case, you gave it up, though, didn't you? That's the guy who gives it up.

Yeah. Look at Nick. What? I don't know what it is. You were doing it before me. I know. He's old school vapey oh this guy's that's not a filter

no he's a basketball player whoa George no what's his name Bob Boban I mean that guy's Dracula or Boban

he's funny though this guy's like legit funny he was in a bunch of movies he was in John Wick oh yeah and then he had a commercial for Cheez-Its, too.

Was he in Where the Wild Things Are? No makeup? This guy looks like he's in mid-transformation into a bat or something. Dracula, yeah. Nosferatu. He looks insane. Like the one in the cave where you're like, oh, God. Noferatu. He looks insane.

Like the one in the cave where you're like, oh, God. No, that one doesn't come. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What? Yeah, yeah, yeah. He got pissed off, almost turned into Dracula, and decided to give up. Oh, wow. Anybody see Luck of the Irish, the Disney Channel original movie?

No. I've seen it. He looks like that guy. That looks like Nick. But wasn't he? That guy vapes. I'll tell you what, that little guy vapes. But that's what you're going to turn into when you keep vaping but nick wasn't he the basketball

player like criticizing china and shit is that him yeah yes i think he's he came out with his own shoe he's like look how sweet these are and they're like size 24 we don't want them yeah but uh lots of nba arenas have things where if the opponents miss two free throws in the fourth quarter, they get free something, and the Clippers have free chicken, and it was the last game of the season, and he was playing against the Clippers. There should eventually be some free chicken on the board if he misses the second free throw.

Oh, man, free chicken on the board? Yeah, so that's why the fans are getting a little... It should be noted, though, he's also not the best free throw shooter. It's not like these were two Givens. That's funny. It's always like the loudest cheer of the night. That's funny. That's funny.

I like that kind of shit. I like that. That's funny. Yeah, he seems like a good guy. Well, no, I don't know if he meant to, but it's funny. No, he meant to. You think so? Oh, 100%.

He goes, I got you. I got you. Chicken, I got you. You didn't see the video? No, I did, but I mean. He was saying, I got you. Were they in the lead? It doesn't matter.

That's probably the last game of the season. Oh, I see. The playoffs are already set. They start tonight. I see. Yeah, they're already set. His percentage went down. Oh, I see. The playoffs are already set. They start tonight. I see. His percentage went down. His percentage went down. Hey.

His percentage went down. What else you got, Nick? It was a really expensive night for that. What time does the power shut off? They're supposed to be testing right now. Yeah, not power shut off. Just alarm. Oh, fire alarm?

Yeah. All right. Well, that's it, kids. That's that's it kids Alright I'll be in Australia I'll be in a bunch of different places too North Charleston Augusta Who knows Desert Ridge Improv

Is this coming out this week? Right? Yep Desert Ridge Improv This weekend guys Phoenix And next week The Mothership in Austin

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This is Camp Counselor's Podcast. With Zachariah Porter. And Jonathan Carson. Consider this podcast your new favorite variety show. Where the badges mean nothing. And the drama means everything. Is this podcast even about camping? No, but it is camp.

We cover everything. I have a theory that a chicken finger is the perfect chaser for a tequila shot. No, because at the end of the day, I was a child actor who fell victim to an audition scam. I'm going to be vulnerable for a second. Have you ever had to shop in a husky section at a department store? Then I don't want to hear it. Honestly, I can't talk about this anymore. I'm overstimulated and I'm bloated.

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