The Golden Hour - High Falutin' Stuff at Low Falutin' Places | #194
Episode Date: July 24, 2026Adam Carolla joins Chris and Erik this week and gives the real state of the fire rebuilds: why the Palisades is slowly coming back while Malibu sits frozen behind the Coastal Commission, mill...ion-dollar septic upgrades, and foundations that need 300 concrete trucks before a single stud goes up. He also live-critiques an Instagram container house build, tells the legendary Man Show clam chowder story that ended a bachelor party at the Spearmint Rhino, and remembers the year Eminem bought everyone Taco Bell. Plus fake meat paranoia, why nobody cares about aliens anymore, billionaire bunkers, the Sam Altman whistleblower interview, and the carpenter mindset shift that explains why Adam will never retire.0:00 Intro2:38 Welcoming Adam Carolla4:34 Fire rebuilds: Palisades, Malibu & the Coastal Commission10:21 Venice, the Hoover Dam & how anything got built13:59 Adam critiques an Instagram container house build20:23 Food poisoning stories: the Man Show chowder & Taco Bell with Eminem30:10 Fast food rules & fake meat32:38 Why nobody cares about aliens anymore43:40 Billionaire bunkers & the Sam Altman interview54:25 Never retiring & the carpenter mindset1:00:46 Soccer vs. basketball1:06:10 Wrap-up & tour datesGet two extra episodes every month at https://Patreon.com/TheGoldenHourPodcastTo submit to the show email: thegoldenhoursubs@gmail.com or Dropbox Link: https://www.dropbox.com/request/fqtbexhxyaky9X8f8MV1In the subject line, specify whether your submission is King It or Sting It, Debate Club, Rip My Drip, Relationship Advice, or Flaunt My Aunt. In the body of the email, include the attachment, your name, where you’re from, and in the case of Flaunt My Aunt, the name of your relative.SUBSCRIBE to The Golden Hour Podcast: http://www.youtube.com/c/KingandtheSting Get your King and the Sting merch at https://thicccboy.com/collections/sale-home-pageFollow #TheGoldenHourInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/the.golden....Twitter:https://twitter.com/the_golden_hrFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/KingandtheStingAnd check out Brendan, Chris, & Erik on social media!Brendan Schaub:https://www.instagram.com/brendanschaubhttps://twitter.com/BrendanSchaubhttps://www.facebook.com/OfficialBren...Chris D'Elia:https://twitter.com/chrisdeliahttps://www.instagram.com/chrisdelia/https://www.facebook.com/chrisdeliaof...Erik Griffin:https://twitter.com/ErikGriffinhttps://instagram.com/erikgriffinhttps://www.facebook.com/erikgriffinc...See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Discussion (0)
The wide receivers in the NFL would score a touchdown.
They do the motorcycle thing, you know?
And as a guy used to ride a motorcycle, I can tell you, there's not a throttle on both sides.
It's the right side.
This is so my wheelhouse.
Left is the clutch.
I enjoy that.
You want to do the clutch and the throttle.
You can't.
You're not clutching.
You would be, if you manufactured a motorcycle with two throttles, you would be sued out of existence.
And someone's got to get hold of those young men and explain to them that this is not.
Not an accurate thing is about how to handle your finances.
That's him shaking out a towel at the beach.
But dude, I'll tell you, maybe that's what they're doing.
They're about to lean down.
Friends that laugh with friends that shout.
Sometimes we don't know what we're talking about.
But that won't stop.
Nothing can stop us.
That's in Pebble Beach.
It's at Laguna Seca.
It's the only good
It's really my only vacation
When it's car week
In Laguna's sake of once a year
Yeah you work
You stay working man
I don't mind it
I it's all
It's all fine with me
Working
Yeah I used to have
I used to be
I used to have such horrible jobs
That's like talking
Now you're doing what you want to do
Yeah yeah 100%
I was in a
I tell this story sometimes
You are
You
The
One of the most fascinating things
I've seen
I've heard is when you were on the plane, you were behind me to, we were going to JFL one year,
and you were talking with people and you never stopped.
And I was like, this dude is, I already known you.
I had already known you.
We were buddies, but I was like, he's unbelievable how he does this.
I was like, how do you do that?
And I would, and I would think, how do I do that?
You know what I mean?
And then when the podcast started happening, I'm like, I got to do that.
So I always would look at that.
I was like, oh my gosh, dude.
because it was all interesting too.
It wasn't just like some idiot talking.
Like he has points.
I'm like,
you already thought about all this stuff.
So there's no point of you on the plane
when you were like,
this fucking guy.
Well, no, I was like,
no, no,
but I did think what would,
I did think what would happen
if I was sitting next to him?
I would have to say stuff too and like,
yeah.
Hey,
because I'm still young in the game.
Welcome to the podcast,
the wonderful Adam Carolla.
Yeah.
Yeah.
The best.
Thanks.
Yeah, the best.
So, yeah.
But that was always like,
I remember that like a formative
time in my career.
I'm like, I got to get like that.
The, it's, are we doing a podcast?
Yeah, we start.
So we do.
Yeah.
We started.
Yours is fancy in comparison.
There used to be official starts and ends.
No, no.
We like go right into it, maybe.
Maybe even life is not really going to have an official ending anymore because, you know,
if you think about it, the official start could be artificial insemination and a donor
womb.
stuff like us. You're not a fit and then we go C-section. You're born in a bathtub at home.
Like maybe there's no official start and maybe the end with AI and all the generated imagery
of you and all the voices. Well, we may be dead, but are we really dead? Not to other people.
Right. Not to other people. We already have a footprint. You know how many Instagram videos I posted?
Yeah. Everybody are going to be able to see it. I think about that sometimes. I'm like,
dude, I got two young kids and 500 episodes of my podcast.
And I'm like, they could just look at that.
Like when my dad goes, you know, I don't know.
I got to look at old grainy ass pictures.
Right.
I know.
He's in a sailor outfit.
He's seven.
Yeah.
I can't even find pictures of myself when I'm a kid.
I got to go to some closet.
It looks like, it looks like bigfoot pictures where you go, well, that's him behind
the tree, you know?
Yeah.
And everything is documented now, which is crazy.
But when it's not documented, you get frustrated because we're so used to it.
Like somebody gets stabbed or shot and you're like, where's the footage?
And it was like, it was in the mountains.
It was like, I want footage.
Yeah.
They got drones.
They got drones and ringed doorbell somewhere.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Dude, I wanted to ask you something.
I saw you, a video of you, like you've went out to where the fires were.
Yeah.
Yeah, I like that.
Like I feel like I'm out of sight out of mind.
I think a lot of people are like that.
Mm-hmm.
And we forget how terrible it was.
But you were out there on the front lines just going,
looking at everything.
What's the state of it now?
And do we have a person to blame?
And what's the future of that area?
Well, we should blame Ellen.
Just because.
Why not?
Why not?
She's got a lot of stuff.
She can take it.
She's got all the money she needs.
She can get a little blame.
So I blame Alan for the fires.
That's number one.
Number two.
So I can't speak to what's going on in Altadena.
I can't speak as an expert as to what's going on in the palisades
and to what's going on in Malibu.
Malibu has essentially zero rebuilding.
There's one structure and another one that's getting started.
But ostensibly, Malibu has zero
because that's under the heading of the Coastal Commission.
And palisades are creeping along,
not at a breakneck speed, but there's work,
there's framing there's houses in like different stages a build a lot of them are being wrapped
and stucco like when the windows start going in and the stucco starts going on and the roof goes on
and they get kind of buttoned up closed up there's a there's a few of those so palisades is
is moving along slowly but surely and malibu's not moving at all now it's been over a year right
yeah it's been over a year and a half so malibu nothing no because they got to deal with the coastal
Commission and the Coastal Commission is very difficult and also the weird subject that no one really
knows about is everything on the coast in Malibu, they're all on septic. So they don't have a sewer
system to the city that they're attached to. They're all on septic. So if you're in a like a rural
part or an unincorporated part or whatever, you're not hooked into the city sewer system. You're on a
system. And the septic system on all those homes needs to be completely redone. And the former
septic system was done in like 1952. And now we have to bring it up to code. And the code is sea walls
and all sorts of crazy safety stuff. And, you know, basically here's how California works. If you want to
do it, want to rebuild Malibu, then you've got to do a one million dollar upgrade on your septic system.
so none of your septic leaks into the ocean.
But Tijuana's got a river that just flows shit right into San Diego,
two billion gallons a day.
And everyone just goes, what are you going to do?
Just route it to San Diego then.
Yeah, we should route it to San Diego.
So, so, but that's the thing.
But even if they do pay that one million dollar upgrade,
it still takes too long for that.
It still takes this long.
But I don't get,
because the people who have these houses definitely have million dollars.
They have money.
They have money, but they can't expedite the system, which is tons of engineering and tons of permits and tons of red tape.
And that's all because the city wants money.
Yeah.
I mean, they want money.
They want liability.
They want liability.
And so everything has to be built sort of like tons of concrete, tons of rebar, tons of foundation, tons of seawall.
like just the guy told me one site that I'd been visiting.
The guy said there's 3,000 yards of concrete in the foundation.
So 3,000 yards.
Now, all right, let me put that in layman's terms.
That is, each concrete truck holds 10 yards.
So that would be 300 concrete trucks before any wood arrives for framing.
That's just the base.
That's just the foundation.
which is way over-engineered, but that's what they require.
So if you're picturing building a house,
like, you know, the building we're in right now,
we're sitting on a four or five-inch slab
with a little footing going around it.
This entire building has 25, 30 yards of concrete.
This thing has 3,000 yards of concrete,
and that's before they start the first floor.
And maybe also that people aren't as rich as we think they are.
Because maybe you bought this house 30 years ago
and they bought it for $750,000,
and now 30 years later it's worth $10 million.
Also, even it doesn't mean they have.
Yeah, yeah.
And then also if you have like, you know,
if it's your third house or whatever,
you got all those other mortgages and you know,
it's like, I'm going to pay a million dollars for this shit now.
I don't know.
Yeah, but who buys it up?
I mean, are they going to sell?
Well, that's a thing that's selling the property?
Well, if you buy the land,
you know first two or three million dollars is going into the foundation,
into the seawalls.
into the septic tanks.
It's like you've got to know all of that is built in.
But the way rich guys, you know, developers get richer is you go, this lot on PCH, you know,
they buy it for $5 million.
And by the way, it's it's only 40 feet wide and like 80 feet long.
It's a very small lot.
But anyway, they buy it for $5 million.
They bill the house on it, foundation all in or whatever.
for six million.
Now they're into it for 11.
And they sell it for 14.5.
So they made themselves
three and a half million bucks in 18 months.
You know, so that's how speculators.
Man, I was just looking about,
I was just looking at this video that was showing
how Venice was built back when Venice was built,
not Venice, California, Venice, Italy.
And they just stuck fucking wood pokes pylons.
And it's still there?
Yeah, yeah.
I'm like, dude, what's been thinking for 50 years?
What do they do for septic?
I know, but like, when's that, when's that sliding off into the fucking ocean?
I know, but even when I was a kid, they were like, Venice is sinking.
They used to say that all the time.
But, dude, it's insane.
Well, they just, they just pounded pilots into the ground.
Well, that's how every one of those houses that burnt down was just built on telephone poles that were just smashed down in the ground.
Dude, yeah.
This is, this is the thing that I don't, like this, like, when I watched this Venice video, I don't know what this was.
But, yeah.
But what, it's so hard for me to believe that.
People decided to do this, figured out it would work, and then implemented it.
Yes.
And this was many, many, many years ago without fucking big machines and all this.
So it's like, this is the kind of stuff that makes me sometimes believe in simulation.
Because I'm like, you're telling me all this shit happened.
All this shit happened.
I know how lazy everybody is.
Yeah.
Oh, they didn't even invent Mexicans yet.
How you pull this shit off.
I'm pretty sure Mexicans came out in the 80s.
Yeah, yeah.
I want to see that video.
The year Mexicans were invented.
But I just, I can't, I can't even like for, and forget, forget cell phones bouncing back
and the TV waves and we're able to turn on a TV and pick a channel.
I don't even believe this shit.
Yeah.
And this is physical, something physical you can see someone do.
It's, you know, the Hoover Dam was built in 1931 and five years.
And if you go look at the Hoover Dam, you got a picture what the Hoover Dam was before there was
anything there.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Just cliffs, a valley, and a huge river.
Yeah.
Just water flowing.
Somebody went, all right, let's get going.
Roll your sleeves up.
I mean, I get that a lot of the people back then had a lot less to do.
So it's not like people were like, but I'm having so much fun on my Instagram.
Right.
You know, you'll be like, oh, yeah, you're going to build a fucking thing?
Sure, I guess I'm not doing anything else.
No air.
I'm usually just waiting for the sun to rise, you know?
So.
But even the point of why they built the dam in the first place, there had to be.
be like some something was happening where they're like well we need to so we can have you know more
land yeah yeah yeah viable land right here yeah priorities yeah you know i was reading about the hoover dam
and it's weird they discriminated they let black people work on it but they didn't let them stay
in the camp that they'd built they stay i'm saying another camp but welcome to my work they did not
but here's the better part uh Asians they said nah you don't you're not even working here
Oh, really?
If you want anybody to build a wall.
It wouldn't have fallen.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You get, you know what I mean?
Yeah, they figure it out.
Yeah, they know how to do.
They're like that.
We're not really fond of the blacks, but Asians, not at all.
We don't even trust the way they build stuff.
Yeah.
So they barred Asians from working on the Hoover Dam.
Oh, wow.
Which is, man.
That's crazy.
That's you people.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, that's us.
I was directly involved with that.
people build the dams.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
We've got to get credit for that.
But imagine the outrage today on that, huh?
They just go like, by the way, no Asians are fixing the dam pipe.
It would just be DEI, just fat, trans women.
We need more lesbians.
You know, they're just working on this road.
We don't have any lesbians.
They didn't have any Jews building it either because they're all just in upper management.
Right, right, right.
They're not getting out there and toiling.
Well, somebody's got to work on the finances.
You do what you do best.
All right, I got another one.
for you. I'm obsessed with
these Instagram accounts where
someone's like, hi, I just bought
$150,000 lot and I want to build a house.
And then the whole Instagram account is then
like this girl. She started, this is one of those
this is this going to be AI. Eric doesn't even know it's AI?
No, no, no, no. This is like she's
like, Eric can't tell what AI is.
It's the, what are those things
call those container? It's a container.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. So she got
it for, it's like building for under $100,000.
I'm just following her account and you can
Like you're a builder guy.
Do you follow these kinds of things?
I mean, I'm not, you know, I do a lot of it and I know a lot of it.
So I'm like maybe, maybe I'm like a guy who works at a pastry shop who's not in the mood for pastries when I get home.
You know, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Would you be too critical?
I am with comedy specials.
I know, but would you be me too critical?
Would you be watching this and being like, ah, she's not using her right two by four with the thing and there's no joist with the other thing?
Are you like that?
Well, I would say Joyce Hanger, but I wouldn't say thing, but I know what you're saying.
And there he is.
And there he is.
I would say either Tico Clipper or Joyce Hanger, also known as an A-35, if you're going to order it from Simpson.
But anyway.
Well, he knows about pastries.
You just made the pastry.
Oh, yeah.
Wow.
But I wouldn't dare try to school you up about a pastry.
That's not a croissant.
Well, my sister actually built one of these container houses.
It kind of was a fad.
It's kind of more trouble than it's worth, but I don't know.
That makes sense.
What is this?
If you started a container home and see what she said.
So she made this?
Well, this is a recent video.
If you go to her page and go to like,
you go to the first one when there's nothing when they're delivering the containers and stuff.
She's putting a vapor barrier down on the floor if you want to know what that's called.
And she's insulating.
She's using a rigid insulation on the floor.
So that's important, I guess.
She's using a vapor barrier and rigid foam.
Wow.
If there was a building.
Now she's using expanding foam on the joints because she's putting a plywood subfloor down three-quarter CDX supply.
Good one side.
And so, okay, so pause it.
So what she did is she put plastic down as a vapor barrier.
Then she put insulation down, but she put rigid insulation down, not like the Owens Corning pink stuff.
Then she ran, go back for a second.
She ran some gaps, which looked like chases for running wire and electrical and
stuff like that. And then she went and re-insulated that with expanding foam where the two foam
wasn't coming together. Then she went over that with a probably three-quarter inch plight sub-floor.
So that is the sub-floor that's the plywood that you're seeing on top of now.
What do you think of this? Is she doing a good job? Like, is this like you wouldn't do it this way?
I don't know what her foundation is. I guess it's a slab. I'm guessing she's on a slab. And I'm guessing
she's in a cold weather place. She must be in a cold weather place.
Where is, where she had, she had a beginning.
She must be somewhere that's cold weather because she's insulating the slab.
Yeah.
So, which is not.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
She's got all park is on and shit.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You wouldn't put insulation down on a slab.
You just put your flooring down on the slab.
There was a building jeopardy.
This guy.
So wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Choice for a thousand.
You do, you do this?
No, I mean, not that specifically.
I just know what everything is.
I know what everything is.
Okay.
It all just kind of applies kind of universally.
Well, let me see some more of her.
What's the seven-month build update?
I thought that's the first one.
All right.
So she starts with her subfloor.
Okay, so pause it there.
Okay, she, the thing that's sitting on is she put some casons down in the ground.
She did concrete and she went down on the ground.
She put some rebar cage in there.
And she came up out of the ground with a form like a sauna tube.
It's called she poured it.
She formed it.
She stripped it.
And she now setting her.
Joyce, but she's not using any wood on the floor.
She's using metal.
Yeah.
Metal Joyce.
All right.
Sorry.
Keep going.
This is interesting.
I love all these.
And, and, so she's, this is a beautiful area.
So that's her sonatube.
So that's her pouring.
She's pouring.
She's got her, she's raised up, raised her foundation up off the ground.
And she's, and these are just shipping containers.
Yeah.
So I, so I lied then.
She's not on a slab.
She's on the bottom of the shipping container, but she,
insulated it because it's metal.
Got it would get really, it would get really cold.
And now there's, now she's putting them and welding them together.
And then at some point, she's going to start putting like, I, I, again, it's not really
less work or easier to do it with shipping containers.
It's better off just framing the place.
Is it cheaper though?
Not, not really.
I don't, you have to do.
do so much work to the shipping containers.
You have to cut out whole panels and do all the stuff she's talking about.
So I don't really, it's just kind of a cool thing.
It's sort of like modular homes.
Modular homes are great, but they're not really cheaper.
People think the modular stuff is cheaper.
It's not really cheaper.
It's maybe a little bit faster, but maybe in several years.
I just can't wait until they do the 3D printing ones.
I was going to say, that's just what I was going to ask.
Did they have a cement machine?
I saw a thing.
Crazy.
This huge machine.
And they're just pouring the...
I mean, they look terrible now, but when they figure that out?
Yeah.
It's common.
Yeah, it's coming.
Plop a home on there.
Yeah.
Well, I saw a thing about you can invest in that machine.
Yeah, the machine just runs like 24-7 and it's got like mortar.
Right.
Cement going around and it puts beads out.
And then they just keep stacking the beads.
That's crazy.
Yeah.
But this is the kind of thing that is they're going to come out with a better way of doing it.
This is the one.
You don't want to invest in this one.
Not the first one.
No, no, this is, in a few years, there's going to be another one.
It was like how MySpace was and then Facebook came along.
Everyone was like, MySpace is awesome and nobody's on that shit anymore.
Facebook is the one.
And also, all those shipping containers come from China and they're all covered with SARS.
So you get SARS as you move in.
Like, soon as they hand you the keys, as soon as you carry your bride across the threshold,
SARS for you and the family.
When you move in, there's an incubation period.
You need to, yeah, we need to, you need to contain your.
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Have you ever heard that story that Napoleon used the Egyptian sphinx for target practice and shot its nose off?
Or maybe you've heard that a French astrologer named Nostradamus correctly predicted nearly 500 years of human history?
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These stories are what I like to call historical myths, great little tales that may or may not have any basis in historical fact.
On our fake history, we explore these historical myths and try to determine what's fact, what's fiction, and what is such a good story.
It simply must be told.
If you dig stories about death-obsessed emperors, lost civilization,
desperate sieges,
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and famous historical figures
you thought you knew,
then our fake history
might just be your new favorite podcast.
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then subscribe on Apple Podcasts,
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Speaking of SARS,
what about this lettuce diarrhea thing?
Like, it's like,
you know, you go to the market now
and you're like,
what,
What can I buy in this market?
It's not going to give me diarrhea.
Man, you fuck me up with blueberries the other day.
I've been eating more blueberries now because I'm pissed off at you.
He's saying, don't eat blueberries.
Now I get mad and I wash them and I eat I've eaten blueberries every single day since you talked about it.
But there's like, I file these accounts and then somebody will be like, there's like six
companies you shouldn't buy the blueberries from because there's another one where
there's a muffin company that had blueberry muffins, but they're showing they're not even
real blueberries.
They go to a factory and they show you how they make the blueberries.
blueberries and you're like, well, what's, like, what can we eat? Like, what's, what's, what's
healthy? It's like, it's, everything's bad. So just, especially when you have a kid. I have a
young kid now. So now I'm thinking about this. I wasn't thinking about it for me, as you can see.
But now I'm like, okay, I got to make, is diarrhea. Is diarrhea even as bad as we say it? I had it
the other day. I had it the other day. If you're, if you're, if you're, okay, here's
something about diarrhea. If you're at, my monthly diarrhea. You're a heart. I will tell you
this though your horny boyfriend won't still
fuck you if you're gay and
have diarrhea. First hand
a hand of God, I'll tell you that right now.
Okay, well. So,
diarrhea is fine.
I don't mind. And even a novelty
if you're at home. Right. It's just
when you get away from your toilet
where you become vulnerable.
Ah, dude, that's... Very well put.
You can handle it. This is the kind of shit we're saying on
a JFL flight. I'm going to go,
that's fucking interesting, actually. Never would have
thought of that.
People were sending notes for questions.
No, you know what?
I totally agree.
But it's like still, you know, I just,
you could, because you could talk,
they talk about wars and stuff.
You could just take out a whole army
if you just gave them all diarrhea.
Diarrhea at home and alone
is almost sort of fun.
You know what I mean?
You do have that in the back of your head.
There's an audible component to it.
It's kind of fun.
There's a game.
Can I make it to the toilet
without messing up my pants.
There's a sort of, also there's a sense.
I love that game.
There's a sense of just like when you see someone finish a marathon and then just collapse,
that's essentially what happens on the toilet where you just fall over and just go,
there's a, you did it.
You did it.
Up to an Ivy.
Take one of those, take one of those foil blankets and put it over me while I'm on the
toilet, you know, hand me a Gatorade.
Yeah.
There's a, you put a metal.
Yeah, you deserve something.
I tell you guys, one time I worked at us, I was working at a summer camp and,
And it was like young kids up to like, you know, whatever age.
And the cook was making chili and it was in the middle.
It didn't freeze.
Oh.
So literally the whole camp had diarrhea.
Like everyone in the camp had that.
It was just.
It was shit camp.
Yeah, dude.
It was the shittiest.
Oh, no.
You know, let's let's all tell our most disturbing diarrhea.
Yeah, yeah.
Descriptive diarrhea stories.
a bachelor party strip club.
That is a monster time to have diarrhea.
Everybody had diarrhea.
Oh, really?
Yeah, so we were doing.
We were doing the wings?
Is that what happened?
No, no.
It wasn't.
So the thing about like the food poisoning,
people make the mistake with food poisoning.
They go, oh, I ate something.
I ate Taco Bell and I got food poisoning.
It takes like 10 to 12 hours to kick in real food poisoning.
Like a couple of times I got in food poison in my life.
I ate dinner at seven and woke up at 4 a.m.
Yeah.
With food poisoning.
You don't eat it and then feel it at the restaurant.
So we were shooting the man show.
And we broke for lunch at probably about 2 o'clock.
I think we would rehearse and we'd break for lunch and we'd shoot a couple shows.
And we had a guy who was getting married and our staff writer, one of the writers.
And so the plan was.
is we're going to shoot two episodes.
We'd be done it like six or seven,
have a few beers, get on a party bus,
and we're going to take the party bus out to the Spearmint Rhino
in the city of industry,
and we're going to celebrate this guy's,
we're having a bachelor's part.
Oh, my God.
So for lunch, and I remember this like it was yesterday,
for lunch, I'm sitting there next to Jimmy
and another producer guy,
and they have chowder,
they have clam chowder.
This whole thing is just a design for diarrhea.
I have clam chowder.
City of industry.
And I take a taste out of it.
And I go, man, it tastes weird.
Really?
It tasted weird.
Yeah.
You need trust yourself, though?
Tastes spoiled.
Well, this is where Jimmy comes in, Mr. No-it-all.
It's fine.
I go, Jimmy, this tastes weird.
He goes, because they use smoked oysters.
I go, first off, he doesn't even know.
He's so positive.
He goes, they use smoked oysters.
I go, oh.
because it tastes different.
Yeah.
He goes,
yeah,
I know,
because they,
this is clam chatter
where they smoke the clams.
They smoke clams.
I'm like,
okay.
Yeah,
it sounds right.
I take another taste
and now my brain is thinking
smoky flavor
and I'm like,
I maybe,
yeah,
yeah,
I don't know,
it's tasted weird,
but I guess if it's smoke.
Right.
So I end up having enough
and everybody.
Everyone has it.
Oh,
it's just smoked.
Yeah,
it's just smoke.
Jimmy said it was smoke.
Yeah.
That's two in the afternoon.
afternoon and now we're all getting on the bus about seven but everyone's fine right because it hasn't
hit yet but now we get to strip club at like nine or ten that's when and then in like 11 you're getting
that that lap dance and I'm seeing guys like getting up and walking to the bathroom and it's kicking
in at all different times for everybody but by the time we're in that bus heading home at 2 a.m.
Everyone's in that bus going oh hurry hurry and by the time we got to the man show office everyone's just
exploded out of the bus. People
weren't in the bill and they were just shitting
and the potted plants
on the side. Like everyone is just holding a cut.
Did anyone else say
out loud, hey, this tastes weird?
I don't remember. It was off
but it wasn't off
enough to really like make you
push it ahead.
And Jimmy may have given the
smoke speech to everyone. I can't
remember. That's the thing that really fucked everyone up.
I just said it's weird, it's off, I think it's bad,
and he talked me into it being good, and that's what happened.
Yeah, I, Chris, Diary Story?
I'm good for like a real hard, an inopportune.
Like when I was in Detroit, I've told this story a bunch,
but like I was on the road, Eminem got in touch with my people
and was like, he wants to meet you.
So I was like, oh, yeah, this is awesome.
We took a detour and we went to go meet Eminem and talk
with them and all that stuff because we had that thing that went viral and we were on the way and on
the way immediately we were in a sprinter van I was like I got a shit can you pull over to the driver
and the driver's like sure and he pulled over to um to the he he went to the off ramp right
and you could go right or left and to the right it said I'll never get this is a hospital
and to the left it was just an arrow and I go he's he's going to go right right right
because like I could just use the toilet in the hospital.
He went left and I go,
you got to pull over right now.
And I shit in somebody's front yard.
Wow.
On the way to meet M&M.
And then I wiped and I went to go meet M&M.
He has no fucking idea that I shit on the way to them.
Well, this is an interesting full circle diarrhea M&M Taco Bell story
because Eminem was a huge crank anchors fan
and wanted to do crank anchors.
And we said,
we'll come out to 8Mah, we'll come out to your studio, and you can make phone calls from your
studio. So we kind of packed it up. Wow. And we went to M&M's place and he said, I'm buying everyone
lunch and he bought Taco Bell. And that was a year he made like $52 million. That's hilarious.
That's hilarious. $14 worth of Taco Bell. But I remember having Taco Bell with M&M. Wow. So now
That's a, that's a, that's very, uh, it's an American thing to have Taco Bell, the Mexican food, which is American with Eminem, yeah.
Yeah, but I applied.
Like, isn't it crazy that you have a company like Taco Bell and then everyone associates that?
We're shitting yourself.
We're shitting yourself.
Yeah.
And it's still coming in.
Like it's part of their, almost part of their, they almost should just do a commercial for it.
You know what I mean?
You want to get cleaned out?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Get you a chimichanga, you know.
Or anything.
Or anything. Even drink just the water.
Dude, a diet code.
Yeah, yeah.
We won't make it home.
Just honestly, come in.
It'll be a terrible experience.
Dude, I...
Ask for directions.
You'll still shit yourself.
Dude, I went...
I remember the last time I went to Taco Bell and I was 19 and this was however many years
ago, 20-something years ago.
And I, and I was in Union Square in New York and I ate it and I walked out and I looked up at
the Taco Bell and I go, man, you know what?
That really wasn't that good and it's got to be really bad for me.
I go, this is...
the last time I'm ever going to eat Taco Bell.
And it really was.
I made that decision as a 19 year old.
I did that with pussy at 21.
You don't have that anymore.
They do,
he doesn't eat it anymore.
They would say make a run for the border,
which does sound like you got bad diarrhea.
You know what, dot, dot, dot.
They might as just have like water from Tijuana.
You know what I mean?
Unboiled water.
My thing is,
what happens to me is I see these videos.
So now I'm seeing these like Instagram things
a guy's like, hey, this isn't meat.
Here's the 10 places that it's like, it's not real meat anymore.
But you just take that as law.
Like this guy, who's this jackass?
I don't know.
Going on a fucking red robin and the red lobster in the same day, by the way.
But here's the thing I tell people all the time.
They get disappointed because they go for highfalutin stuff at lowfalutin places.
You know what I mean?
You go to Taco Bell.
people get the brisket and lobster
tacharia and they end up going
this sucks it was $4.
It's not going to be good brisket.
You just get a bean burrito, extra cheese,
100% agree.
Onions and tomato, you go home,
you put the hot sauce on it, you're satisfied.
You don't go for the good stuff.
It's like people, they go to a company store
and they order a steak.
And then they go, this is the worst steak.
I know, just get the chicken nuts.
Get nachos, you stupid asshole.
Just get something easy.
Yeah.
They go into the subway and they get the lobster bisque sandwich and it's like it's $4 and it claims
that lobster.
It's not going to make it.
Get the super basic stuff.
They can't screw up.
Couldn't fucking agree more.
Couldn't agree more.
And Eric's the sucker that's like, ooh, they got that new thing.
I'll go get it.
No, never.
What?
What are you talking about?
You are.
You're a guy who'd see a fucking video.
I never go to those places now.
Okay, now.
All right.
Yeah.
I haven't gone to like, I don't even.
I can.
can't do fast food anymore every time I see like it's not just one video I'll see three or four
videos we're talking about when you know this isn't real meat these are the 10 places that aren't
serving real meat and I'm like well how can you should already know that though how do they how do you
but no you don't want to do you want to think that the FDA is a real place yeah that's not allowing
this kind of thing to happen it's not happening it's like it sucks you want to think that you want to
think that you want to think uh Epstein didn't kill himself you know what I mean yeah you know what
happened. Yeah. Wow. Something. Ain't that something that's gone now? Nobody's talking about the
lists anymore. Nothing. What happened? Now it's aliens. And then yeah. But the aliens are like,
how come no one even cares? There's a lot of smart people talking about aliens right now.
Yeah. Smart people. And you go, wait, we're just going to gloss over that there's aliens.
No. Oh, yeah. Well, I have a thought about that. Let's hear it. My thought is that we're too narcissistic to care
about aliens anymore because there was a time when we all stared into the heavens and now we're all
like staring at our phones and if you think about aliens they've made movies about them and it was
all the speculation and all the TV shows and we talked about UFOs nonstop and then at some point
somebody went hey you know there's pretty credible evidence that they exist and we went yeah I know
we're on to this thing that has to do with me what is an alien have why did the alien say something about me
Right, right, right.
Well, I'm done with that alien.
Yeah, but what if you're an alien?
Let's say the aliens have been here for 30 plus years.
They obviously know all the languages.
They know the culture.
Do you think they're sitting at home going like, what the hell is this?
I bet you they have a podcast.
You know, the fake, I bet you're just an alien podcast.
You know, but they're speaking and they're like, yes, it's crazy.
Why would an alien do this?
The fakes part about all our movies that depict aliens, there's never a fat alien.
Oh, man.
There would have to be a fat.
alien they have all the humanoid shapes the face the nose the arms the legs not one lard
ass ever okay that's true there's no fat aliens rightated they're all and you never see
you never see trans aliens either i know but my pushback on that is if you're an alien you're
a part of the alien space force the fatties you don't make the trip you're not you're not you're
not allowing you to go what about what about body positivity man what about the fucking Lizzo's
aliens saying they're fat but the fat ones are all
back home.
Yes.
Where?
Not on the,
okay.
They're not the ones
making a trip.
Yeah,
they're not.
They're not.
Like you don't say,
you don't put Lizzo in a space suit.
Right.
Lizzo's not coming on the trip to the,
you know what you're saying?
It'd be like the aliens studying F1 drivers and assuming that all people who live on
earth are skinny.
And you go,
no, just the ones driving the F1 cars are the skinny ones.
We've got some big boys.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Okay.
I bet you the aliens.
they're fat now because they've been here 30, 40 years.
Right, right, right.
So now they're like, this is how you live.
But this is, if this is real, if this is like, you know, not AI footage, that's crazy.
But this is the thing you look at.
You look at this now and you go, well, this could be AI.
But if that's a real thing, you go, oh, yeah, that's a fucking alien ship.
Are you guys, I feel sort of like I used to be pretty protective.
Like, I don't want the aliens taking over.
But now I'm kind of like, we could use a reset.
Like maybe we need some, some over.
overlord to show up and point us in the right direction or just enslave us.
Like anything.
It's 50-50 really how it could go.
It's just you go, all right, you know.
Well, I mean, if they have.
Also, but at the end of the day, what can you do anyway if they got fucking ray guns and
you know what I mean?
Like, I mean, at this point now you go, like our interpretation of what an alien would do
is what we would do.
Right, right, right.
So when you see like Avatar, of course, the white man goes and he's trying to take the resources
and kill the indigenous people.
That's how we think everyone is.
I took something different away from Avatar, but okay.
No, but that's...
I'm kidding.
But that's the main, you know...
So we think, oh, so here's some advanced...
No, I...
Yeah.
Civilization and they're flying in our places.
They're probably looking at us like,
what are these people doing?
These idiots.
Why is there smog?
Why is there, you know, what are they doing?
I don't...
Did you guys see that?
Oh, I didn't see it.
One of the most boring.
It was bad, so I didn't see it.
It was bad, yeah.
You know what?
I don't think it was bad.
I just think it was bad.
missed the mark. It was. I thought she was a great. She was fantastic. She was fantastic. I just feel
like the story was just like what is this story? What is this? I don't know. I'm not. But you know what?
It was so blah and that's how I think we are acting right now. Like if like you know, what if like right
now it could be it could be happening right now on CNN? This just in, uh, aliens have made contact.
What would we really do? Go get selfies with it. We'd be like, oh, we got to go record it to.
Let me check this out later. Like do we do we really? Do we really?
care? Well, half of the people would think it was a sigh-up, you know what I mean? Right? And then
Nick would be like, it's a s-a-o-o-winked. I already know what's going to happen. It's a s-a-up. But like,
and then the other half of the people would just forget about it. And they'd be like, well,
what do we go? Because the truth is, what are you going to do anyway? If they're going to come here,
they're going to manhandle us. I just think we are so into us and our phones that if it didn't
have anything to do with you directly, most people wouldn't give a crap, which is kind of where
we're at. Yeah. But do you want to believe that like they've been here a long time and then like,
you know, Biden's a clone. Yeah. I want to, I want that all to be sure. And Elon Musk is like a
lizard person. But what if we found that out? Then you'd go, all right, I get, I get why it's so
crazy right now. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, they should even that self-centered. Why? Like, like, Elon Musk goes like
just and he's a lizard person. And we would just go like this. I got this. I just got this. I just got this
image of him doing that and then hearing somebody in the background say, I knew it. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. I told you. Then, you know, everybody's going to, you know, well, I guess the only thing that
would be different if like, Elon Musk takes a mask off. And then he says, my people are 10 days out. Yeah.
And we're, you know, you got to go. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah. There was,
do you remember this show? It was like, it was like a, not HBO. Oh, well, every, every liberal on the west side could get
bumper sticker for the Tesla that says, I got this before Elon was an alien.
I have to put it.
I remember there was this show.
It was kind of like Twilight Zone, but one of the episodes was aliens come and they say to the world,
if we need to take all your black people away.
This is a Twilight Zone?
Yeah, it was like a Twilight.
It wasn't Twilight Zone, but it was like, I've never forget this.
It was like, and it was like, you guys decide if we will take, if we take all the
Black people will clean all the air.
We'll give you unlimited resources of whatever, whatever.
And of course, in the end, they gave all black people away.
All the black people winning ships.
God, I wish I remember what that was.
But it was like a highlight show.
It was like in the 90s, you know, I forgot what the name of the show.
So they were going to take black people and give us stuff?
Yes.
Wow.
So of course.
Whoa.
And it was funny because they had like a,
they had like a,
in the show,
they were doing like a,
a television show
where all the black people would be like,
look, we have to keep them.
It was like Michael Jackson.
Oh,
wow.
Was it Space Raiders?
I don't know.
I forgot what the thing was, man.
I forgot the name of it.
But it was like little vignettes,
like little short,
like every episode was something like that.
Kind of like black mirror.
It was like a black mirror type thing.
There was a show called Dark Shadows a million years ago.
But I don't think,
That would have been like the 60s and the 70s.
No, no, this one was more like 90s.
And so, but my point is, is like, that's the only thing that would give people like, whoa, what's going on?
You know, like if the aliens came and we're like, all right, you know, we're tired of, you know, we're tired of this.
Right.
We've been watching.
Right.
So make up your mind, you know.
What race do we get?
Right.
Whatever.
Pick one.
How many genders are there?
You know, all that kind of stuff.
What if they did?
That's the only thing that would give us like, whoa.
Hmm.
I don't think there's anything that would come.
What could unite the planet, Adam?
What could unite the planet?
Well, you know, the World Cup, you know, got people sort of in the same stadium.
Nothing.
I possibly, look, in all the movies I see, it's going to take a meteor,
and it's going to take a meteor in impending doom,
and it's going to be hurling toward the planet,
and it's got to, we got to put a time statement,
on it. Like we have to put it, you know, it can't be somewhere between 20 years and 100 years.
Like we need, like in like three years. It's three years. This thing is coming toward us. Yeah.
And there'll be nowhere to hide. Yeah. And it's going to hit the ocean. It's going to create a tsunami,
a wall of water, blah, blah, blah, blah. And nobody's going to make it. And we have to have that
documented. And then every time someone went, excuse me, you're not using my pronoun. So
Are you fucking high?
Are you high?
There's a meteor.
I can see it up there.
But wait, but also, you're not going to, you're not taking into account.
Once we figure out that problem of the meteor right after, then, because all those movies
end after that.
After, after that, we get to all fucked up again.
How long until the meteor hits to where they block it or whatever that happens or someone
goes like, all right, so what are my pronouns?
Well, you know what I mean?
It wouldn't take long.
Well, when the meteor hits, then we're all going to the nuclear winter.
And it's all gone for civilization.
So what we need to do is then we get the international delegation together.
And we're like, look, we need all the leading scientists from all the countries and all
the space programs and all the rocketeering programs.
Mexico, we're cool.
But it's got all the leading scientists and we'll get this.
Well, you guys can cater.
How about that?
These people are going to need to eat.
So we'll get them all together, get the think tank together.
Then we get Bruce Willis and a group of drillers to go up there.
Well, who's going to build the ship and the stuff?
You know what I mean?
That's the, that's what you get.
Oh, it's going to be great to all the liberals are going to be like, hey, Elon, I know when we're calling you Hitler.
That was kind of a funny joke, right?
Let's get you building that rocket ship.
Should we, buddy?
I know I burned a Tesla dealership.
I don't know what I was thinking.
Anyway, change your heart.
We need a rocket.
You know, as we're talking about this right now?
That's like when Mike Tyson got out of prison.
They were just joking.
We were all that shit we said on late night TV.
I do.
I do have a theory, though.
The richest dudes on the planet,
that's Elon and that's Bezos and the Indian guy.
They're all,
all the super rich guys are trying to get off the planet.
Like they're going to space.
And then Zuckerberg's building himself.
He's going down.
The rich guys here, they're burrowing into the earth and building bomb-proof,
bomb-proof bunkers, or they're trying to inhabit another planet.
So what?
What's going on?
Well, the richest guys on the planet always have information that we don't have.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And they know something.
Right.
So why is Zuckerberg building a 7,000 or 20,000 square foot self-sustaining bunker
underneath this Maui retreat?
Yeah.
So what's he know?
Basically, this level is for poor people is what they're saying.
That right.
The middle.
This is for the pores.
Yeah, the bread.
If you could drive around in it.
The bread is for the, either the top of the bomb or the sandwich.
We're the meat.
Yeah.
We're in the middle.
What's up with his fly?
We've never had a fly in here before.
Yeah.
And the fly was on his hat for a good, you know, 45 seconds.
That hurt my neck, man.
You're a ass fly.
Ha, no, but now you got these, like, the new rich people now are these AI people.
Yeah.
These, like, these autistic nerds.
That dude who definitely killed someone.
What's his name?
Sam
who definitely killed someone.
Yeah.
Did you see that thing
on Tucker Carlson?
The Meek inherited the earth.
You did, right?
Oh, bro.
Did you see the thing with Tucker Carlson
and Sam Altman?
And Tucker Carlson is like,
well, the guy died in your company.
Oh, this is the best.
This is so funny.
I mean, crazy, but.
People stuff and not paying them.
And then he wound up murdered.
What was that?
Also a great tragedy.
He got a suicide.
Do you think he committed suicide?
I really do.
This was like a friend of mine.
This is like a guy that,
I'm not a close friend,
but this is someone that worked at open eye
for a very long time.
I spent, I was really shaken by this tragedy.
I spent a lot of time trying to, you know,
read everything I could as I'm sure you and others did too
about what happened.
It looks like a suicide to me.
Why does it look like a suicide?
I mean, cut it just.
It was a gun.
He had purchased.
It was the,
This is like gruesome to talk about, but I read the whole medical record.
Does it not look like one to you?
No, he was definitely murdered, I think.
Oh, that's a whole course.
Surveillance camera, the wires have been cut.
He had just ordered take out food, come back from vacation with his friends on Catalina Island.
No indication or all that he was suicidal.
No note and no behavior.
He had just spoken to a family member on the phone.
And then he's found dead with blood in multiple rooms.
so that's impossible.
Seems really obvious.
Well, you killed him.
His mother claims he was murdered on your orders.
I believe that?
I'm asking.
I mean, you just said it.
So do you believe that?
I haven't done too many interviews
where I've been accused of like,
oh, I'm not accusing you at all.
Not at all.
This is insane.
Wait, wait, wait, hold up.
This is crazy on both sides here.
Yeah, yeah.
Because, because, and,
one side the guy's saying well you know people believe that you ordered to murder and he's like do you believe
that he's like well i'm not saying i'd say triple down yeah yeah yeah yeah he should be like it certainly
seems like it feels like yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah but at the same time though it's like either
you know what that guy feels like the other guy he feels like he says yeah yeah like he's
limping on purpose yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah like this autistic thing he's doing i know i know i know i like it would be
great at right in the minute he was like yeah he goes like you know what fuck you yeah yeah he just
just i had him killed yeah yeah it's just like no but at the same time why would
admit like what's he going to say right here?
No, of course not.
Yeah.
Mom's never admit that their son committed suicide.
It means that's a shit mom.
It's all on you, baby.
You were halfway decent.
He'd still be alive.
So they always reject that.
The most compelling point is to take out food.
There's no possible way I would order Indian food to my house and then decide to
snub myself before the grubhub guy showed up.
No way.
I'm eating that tundari chicken.
Then I say.
That's your final meal.
That's my final meal.
That's absolutely compelling.
You're right.
There's no way.
Because when food is coming, you're never more excited in your life.
No, there's no depression.
And Nick for sure knows this.
There's zero depression if you, you know, because you carefully ordered all that stuff.
So what we're saying is he ordered the food, the Chinese food, whatever it was.
Then, then from that excitement got something happened where he got depressed enough to where he shot himself in the head in 30 minutes or less.
scenario. Okay. Because we've all had this. Okay. You order, let's say some Indian food and you go,
and you get a tenderer chicken, you go, give me extra chutney songs. Make sure you're throwing some extra
chutney. And then you open the bag and it's like, no chutney. And it's like, give me the pistol.
Yeah. And you were cleaning your gun already. Yeah. And so you, it was right. It was right there.
Even better is when they go, you order the food. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like 25, 30 minutes go by.
And then they hit you with the, we had to cancel your order. Oh.
Oh, yeah.
Or your driver is late.
Yeah.
Then maybe.
But like this is very like that's, I don't know what to even say.
But that guy is now worth, you know, $175 billion.
Hold on.
Hold on.
So let's take this a bigger picture.
Do we live in a world where a guy who's got more money than God or whatever can have this happen and get away with it?
We do.
I guess.
Well, also, if you're worth $175 billion, why do you sit down with Tucker Carlson?
Well, that's anything at any other thing.
Man, I've been saying this.
Why are they doing this?
Why are they on any podcast?
I would not be nowhere.
No, there's no way.
I never understand that.
Obviously, it's a, you know.
Here's another question.
Here's another question.
Why, if you have that much money, you have this much wealth and power and you, you've done it, right?
Is there anything more you need to do to make it?
Fame, it's all ego.
I know, but at that point, who, who was, who was, what?
What was this guy going to do?
Whatever this guy was going to, they say he killed?
Right, right, right.
What was that guy going to disrupt?
That's true.
That's true.
What was he going to disrupt when you already have $175 billion?
Nothing.
Right.
What was he going to disrupt?
So that's the point where you go like, well, why would he do that?
Yeah.
Or at least blackmail him.
Or that guy is just a monster.
Yeah.
Right.
Well, that's the thing, though.
Once you get to be a certain level, you go, I could have people killed.
That's one my favorite scene in Batman, though, is like the guy that's coming.
He's going to, he wants to blackmail.
He goes, I know.
no Bruce, Bruce Wayne's Batman.
And then the other guy goes, so let me get you straight.
A guy that dresses up like a vigilante and beats people up on his free time, you want
to blackmail that guy.
Right, right, right.
And he says, go ahead.
Right, right.
So I feel like in this case, you know, you had this autistic mastermind right here.
You're going to, what is that guy going to do?
Yeah.
You just called the guy in your office and you go, you know, what are we doing?
Right, right, right.
You see that?
He must be just ego maniacal, just an.
not be like, can I just pay you a billion dollars and you shut the fuck up? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Like, why wouldn't that be the thing? I just don't understand. You know, it'll be a good business.
That would be a good business for Tucker and possibly us. You get interviews with super rich people.
And before the interview, you, you know, you do it at night. Yeah. You do it kind of intimate setting, you know, and the high back sort of chairs, you know, make it easy. And then at some point when they come in.
they go, what's your drink? What do you like? You know, like Bill Maher. And they go, oh, you know,
I like a little bourbon. You overpour a little bit. Right, right. And you put apple juice
in your glass, you know, and you just say, man, you kind of point, point, oh, let me freshen
that up for you. And then at some point, you start talking about strippers or hookers or
killing or prostitute, whatever it is. And they start, and then really, it's like you start
getting into like, you know, look, I got Jewish friends. But I do understand.
and where people you play that for you do it an hour and a half right and then when it's all over you go listen
you're pretty buzzed right and they go yeah you said a bunch of fucking shit that's insane yeah and i'll
tell you what i'll just two million bucks i'll fucking i'll break this fucking yeah i'll take how many episodes
you can drop this fucking thing in the toilet and flush it's two million bucks that's fucking nothing
i'm not saying it's gonna turn into anything yeah yeah yeah yeah i'm not saying it's not
i know it won't if it doesn't show you said shit about your ex-wife yeah yeah you said shit
about the trans community.
He said shit about the Jews.
He said some legal shit about some old partner.
You called him a douche.
I don't know if he's litigious.
It's two million bucks.
It's fucking nothing and this never happened.
Yeah.
That's my podcast.
So this never happened by the way.
And by the way, there's no episodes that ever come out.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
Every Wednesday, the schedule is we don't air every Wednesday.
At noon.
You know, it's like, why is Corolla driving around and Rolls Royce if he has a podcast?
It never came out.
You wouldn't even, and you can even do like this.
Sam Allman, you don't even need to give me the money.
Just let me put $10 billion in a Bank of America's savings count for a year.
I'll keep the interest and I'll give this back to you.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
You know, I just, I think that it just goes to show you that people just don't give a fuck.
I mean, he obviously.
Oh, sorry.
No, no, go ahead.
I'm just saying, Jeffrey Epstein, I get.
You know, you have a group of people who make a lot of money.
They're on a list.
They're sitting around a table and somebody goes, we got to get rid of it.
It's like that scene in a casino where they're like, he's solid.
The other guy's like, yeah, he's good.
The one guy's, are we sure?
Right.
That's what that was.
That's what that was.
And they were like, just get rid of them.
Should we make it an accident?
I don't care if you burn the place down.
I don't care if a hit team comes in here and kills him.
Get rid of that guy.
Nuclear bomb the city.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Get rid of that guy.
Yeah.
So I think if it's something like that, I get.
But this guy they're talking about?
I know.
No, yeah.
Yeah.
Nobody knew about the guy until he got committed suicide.
Yeah, you know, what did he know?
Right, right.
Or any time it's like a guy that like, you know, he invents a, we can make, we can make
electricity from water.
Or the cure to cancer.
Oh, wait, I have a cure to cancer.
When that guy disappears, then you just start to go, okay, well, what happened?
Right.
Because there's too many of those stories.
Yeah.
What about all those rocket scientists who disappeared four months ago?
Right.
What about the black guy that makes gas out of plastic?
Mm-hmm.
They silence that guy.
I'm shocked.
He's still alive.
I make gas out of lettuce.
Ladies and Adam Carolla
Let's see us a website
Where are you going to be
Oh man
I'm going to be to Porta Potty near you
I don't know
When's this air
Oh wait how much I got to pay you guys
Not to air this
Not much
We'll do it for $50
Yeah can we check the Forbes
We've got to see like
What Forbes says your net worth
The
You love
You love working
I don't love
What's up?
I don't love working.
I don't, I don't dread it like, um, you're the white Sam Jackson.
I, I, I, I was a carpet cleaner.
I worked at McDonald's.
That's hilarious.
Nick's got the art for your.
Yeah, this never happened.
The Diary Chronicles.
This is great.
I, uh, I work construction.
And so standing around talking doesn't, doesn't count for me.
So, because you could, you, I guess, you know, we talk about, do you ever see yourself like,
my dad never wanted to retire
you know what I mean is that a thing that you would ever
want to do I know I don't really know
from what you know I get to
travel around I get to
no it's awesome I agree with you write books
make docs you know it's like I talk to
people laugh I agree with you yeah
like people are like would you retire I'm like I don't know
but when I see where you're going to be sometimes
it tells me
it tells me that are you love doing this right
because you'll be at like
Freehold
Albuquerque there's one I'll be at a Starbucks
and uh you know
He's like he's going to do two nights at a Starbucks in, you know, Bridgetown.
You're like, what do you do?
See, also, I grew up in North Hollywood, like right around the corner from here.
I never went anywhere.
I never did anything.
My family never went or did anything.
I get to go to all these cities, see all these people, go to all these different places.
Like, you get paid to go to places that you would never go.
Never go.
And spend the whole day walking around looking at all the local whatever.
I do kind of like that.
I'm always surprised when I'll go to some.
some place and be like, there's no world where I would want to come here.
And then you go and you're like, wow, this is interesting.
Like the United States is actually very beautiful country.
Yes.
And there's a lot of great stuff all over the place that, you know, we're still busy
being like, well, I got to go to Greece.
Yeah.
I got to go to China.
I got to go here.
When you could just go to Idaho and find a really nice something or other, you know?
Oh, yeah.
I mean, I was just in, you know, around, I don't know, Lake Arrowhead, Nevada.
Yeah.
And over there.
And it's like, it's beautiful.
Yeah, there's stuff all over the place.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's spectacular.
And then there's places you would just never go.
There's places in Wisconsin.
Right, right, sure.
Never go to that place in Wisconsin.
And you get paid and everyone's nice and like, I don't know.
Super appreciative that you're there.
And also like, why not just go, hey, this is what I do and I like it versus like fighting it.
Like I will tell you when I was a carpenter, I didn't want to.
I was always like, I don't want to be a carpenter.
I want to do comedy, I want to do comedy, I want to do comedy.
But the day I just said to myself, I go, you are a carpenter, that's what you do.
And start acting like it and get your shit together and get your tools organized, get yourself
organized, be professional.
I was immediately happier as a carpenter, even though instead I was a carpenter eight hours a day
going, I want to get out of here.
Right, right, right.
And it made it miserable.
Interesting.
So you remember you had that shift?
I remember having a shift that basically said,
you don't want to do this for the rest of your life,
but it looks like you're going to be doing this for a while.
And why are you fighting it if this is what you're doing every single day?
Why don't you get organized?
Good way to live.
Why don't you get your bags right and your tools right and your shit right
and stop being sloppy and start getting focused and focus on your work?
And I immediately was more satisfied and it made the job much easier.
I think that's how Americans should feel about the United States.
Like, let's just, this is our place.
Let's enjoy it.
I think that's what was great about the World Cup.
All these people coming from other countries were like, man, this is great.
You can go to, you get AC.
You can drink at the game.
When you think of America, you think of the, it's a place with all the cities.
You know what I mean?
But it's like, there's beautiful fucking spots.
Yeah, man.
Montana's a great state that people wouldn't even think.
I know, yeah.
I mean, there's so many beautiful places in Montana.
That's one of the two states I've never been to, Montana.
You've never been to Montana?
I'm surprised.
You hear that Montana?
Let's get Christopherian on Alaska's breathtaking.
Yeah, I want to go there for sure.
Yeah, but just now with this 40 below.
I'm just like, what are I doing here?
I've gone there.
He's always cold?
Not always, but it feels like it is.
I alienated everybody at the comedy club in Alaska
because I went to go salmon fishing for like four or five days
and then it went back to like Anchorage and played this honky-tongy kind of
Alaskan comedy club.
I always had this joke.
I didn't do this joke.
This is an alien, but I always told people,
if you ever going into a place in Alaska
and it's too crowded and you can't get room at the bar
or whatever, you just walk in and you yell Federal Marshal
and watch everyone dive out the window
because everyone in that fucking place.
You didn't do that joke there?
No, I didn't, but I told them, I go, listen,
I just not even a joke.
I go, listen, I've been salmon fishing for like four or five days
eating a salmon right out of the river.
And I got to tell you, honestly,
the shit at Trader Joe's is exactly the same.
And everyone went out of their mind.
They're like, fuck.
you, fuck you.
And I was like, I'm serious.
I'm telling you the Trader Joe's, if you blindfolded me, the shit I got from Trader
Joe's taste exactly.
Maybe it's a kudos to Trader Joe's.
Maybe that's nothing to do.
But I mean, you guys ever tried Trader Joe.
You can't tell the difference between the shit people out of the river and the Trader Joe shit.
And the whole audience turned on me.
That's good.
Was it, you were in Anchorage?
Yeah.
Is it like a place where you had to go upstairs to a bar area?
And there was like a big.
down stairs and there's upstairs like green roomy thing like Uncle Joe's yeah I played that
cool dude yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah honky tonkey like it wasn't strip ball kind of yeah yeah
tons of tons of history yeah it can be awesome yeah I love those places when it's just like
that's when it's just about the comedy you know right some small place everybody knows everybody
yeah you're just out there doing that's it yeah what's it called chillcott charlie yeah that's it yeah that's it
yeah that's it yeah it's just the bar for the
bar could talk kind of thing you know it's just it was it was fun damn yeah i want to go maybe i mean
i don't know you know you don't want to go well i just i want to be with my kids as much as i can but yeah
i know that's that's a difficult thing six and three yeah that's old enough for an alaskan bar
you got grow up sometime bro yeah that's what you're saying i don't i don't want to go
because i want to leave i want to be with them not that i want to bring them to the alaskan bar
Yeah, you're just guys like two milks
Well, let him away in the car, man
Two milks on a Shirley Temple, please
Oh man
I don't know
So what a weird thing
Were you ended a World Cup?
Did you, uh,
I had a little bit of a revelation
Which is I,
I didn't never like soccer
And I never really followed soccer
But somebody told me
You know, they go,
You know, the thing that's wrong with soccer
Is they need up the scoring.
They need more scoring.
And I was like,
Nah, I think it's better
With this weird way
where there's so little scoring.
It's like so much foreplay.
When there's an orgasm, it's an eruption.
Right, right, right.
Like, I don't think soccer would be good
if all the games were seven to 14 or seven and ten or something.
Well, not even that.
Take basketball.
I always thought there was two,
there were, it's too high of a score.
Basketball, it's too many baskets, dude.
You got to at least.
I can't even with you.
No, you can't.
You're going to cheer every time the motherfucker makes a thing.
that's crazy to me.
That's why I didn't like basketball.
I tell you what I don't like about basketball.
The inconsistency of the guy
makes the free throw
and everybody has to lean over
and be like, hey man, hey man.
By the way, LeBron James,
been in the fucking league for 22 years.
He makes a free throw in the middle of the season.
You're out of that way to lean over.
Good job, they're saying.
That's how you win ball games.
But when he misses the free throw,
they do the exact same motion.
So you got to pick a lane.
Hey, good point.
That's why you would do that.
But if I made a shit point, you wouldn't do the exact same path.
Well, it might be like, you're nurturing.
Yeah, I'm saying, you don't do the, you don't get the same response.
Oh, I'll tell you the thing that sports have pissed me off the most, that they don't, they don't do as much.
But about three years ago, when the wide receivers in the NFL would score a touchdown, they do the motorcycle thing, you know?
And as a guy used to ride a motorcycle, I can tell you, there's not a throttle on both sides.
It's the right side.
This is so my wheel house.
left is the clutch.
I enjoy that.
If you want to do the clutch
and the throttle,
you can't.
You're not clutching.
You would be,
if you manufactured a motorcycle
with two throttles,
you would be sued out of existence.
And someone's got to get hold
of those young men
and explain to them
that this is not an accurate.
I agree with that.
I would just love to see like,
it's like they do the combine
and they have like 400 NFL players
and they go,
ladies gentlemen,
Adam Carolla,
then you come out and you go,
okay, guys,
when you're doing your,
yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I need just to be factually correct
when you guys are doing your...
Yeah, I'm not here.
The big line men, obviously,
it doesn't matter we know
you've never been on a motorcycle.
I'm not here to tell you about...
Wow, dude.
How to handle your finances.
That's him shaking out a towel at the beach.
But dude, I'll tell you,
maybe that's what they're doing.
They're about to lay down.
I will say that
this is what I don't like about soccer.
And everyone always gives me shit about this.
but soccer is soccer until it's a tie
and then they do a shootout.
Yeah.
So basically they're just changing the whole fucking game
after working so hard to get to the point that they're at
where they go, all right, fuck it.
Let's just do a shootout.
You're admitting you don't like soccer.
Yeah.
Do more soccer.
But we've given them two hours to do soccer
and we can't get any results.
That's the problem.
got to just stop this. But then you got to change the game. Then you got to stop the game.
Okay, it's one to one. Who fucked up? You lose. You got the knee injury. You're out.
The fucking Spain wins. Here's something I, in defensive soccer, what I like about the world soccer
is no matter what's going on in the world, no matter what's going on in your country, you could
have a dictator. Yeah. And you're like doing terrible stuff in your country. Yeah. But your soccer
team is still going to be in the pitch for a world. That's great. You know, it's like,
Iran versus Germany. They still go back to that.
They still go back to that country.
Right.
I know, but it's weird how we, like,
we let a lot of stuff go.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But it seems to bring everyone together.
I think that's kind of an interesting thing.
Sure.
I'll tell you what I don't like.
I don't mind the flopping,
but I don't like the flop with the writhing.
They roll around on the ground holding their knee,
and they writh and they writh and they ride and then 25 seconds later.
They're on their feet sprinting down the field.
That's, that guy should be thrown out.
WWW.
Because you flopped, you rived in pain, and then you popped up your feet.
If you ever seen an instance outside of soccer where a guy was writhing and running,
like a guy, like a guy ate shit, fell off a ladder.
Like it was cleaning his gutters, hit the pavement hard.
He was laying on the ground, holding his hip screaming.
And at some point he went, oh, UPS guys here.
And he just sprinted down the driveway.
No, when you're writhing, you're writhing for your walk with a limb for the next three weeks.
My wife fell off a ladder.
And for a week, she couldn't do so.
No running after riding.
But I'll tell you why they do that is because they don't stop the clock.
I mean, that's the nature of the game.
So the clock continues to go and the only time they even stop anything,
if you really watch the game, they're really rough with each other.
So the rest aren't calling anything.
So the nature of that means that the only way I'm going to get a call or get anything
is I have to now demonstrably.
Fine.
That's the reason.
Just don't change the game after you tie.
It's fucking horseshit.
All right, we give up.
Just do goals.
It's exciting.
Flip a coin.
But just start with the shootout.
Oh, these guys are terrible.
Don't forget ari Griffin.com.
I'll be in Miami and Louisville.
Hey,
before we continue,
hey, thanks for,
thanks for being here.
We love Adam, man.
It's great, you know,
you were our joy,
and we appreciate you coming out.
And make sure you go check out, Adam.
Go to Adamkoroa.com.
So you can see his tour dates.
And where he's going to be.
You know what?
If you think he might not be coming to your city, you got to go to his website.
He might be coming to your city.
So check that out.
That's good.
So thanks for being here.
Make sure you go to chrystalia.com for tour dates.
And I got a bunch of new stuff too on my website.
So come to Eric Griffin.com as well.
Yeah.
Thanks, guys.
Thanks, guys.
Thank you, man.
Thank you.
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Hello, and welcome to Plutofo.
If you know the name of the movie you'd like to see,
just stream it for free on Pluto TV.
Where all your blockbuster favorites are landing all summer long.
Catch Anchorman, the Legend of Ron Burrower.
The legend of Ron Burgundy.
Fantastic.
The Matrix Trilogy.
Welcome to the real world.
Mean girls.
Shut up.
Titanic.
I'm the key in the world.
And so much more.
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