The Golden Hour - I Know That Alligator | The Golden Hour #140 w/Brendan Schaub, Erik Griffin & Chris D'Elia

Episode Date: July 11, 2025

The boys are back to talk Jake Paul vs Julio Cesar Chavez Jr., Ben Askren’s double lung transplant Nick knowing the alligator from Arnold Schwarzenegger’sn the 6th day movie, Antonio Brown news, updates on Diddy's trial, Playboy mansion and Hugh Hefner stories, Kevin trying to hook up with Charlize Theron, strip club experiences and much more! Get this episode AD FREE + 2 PATREON ONLY episodes/month only at https://patreon.com/thegoldenhourpodcastDraftKings - Download the DraftKings Pick Six app NOW and use code GOLDEN. That’s code GOLDEN for new customers to play $5, get $50 in Pick 6 credits.Quince - Stick to the staples that last with elevated essentials from Quince. Go to http://quince.com/golden to get free shipping and 365-day returnsDraftKings - Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app and use code GOLDENFITBOD - Get 25% off your subscription or try the app FREE for seven days at https://fitbod.me/GOLDENHOURAmerican Financing - Call American Financing today 866 - eight eight six - ninety two sixty two, That’s 866 - eight eight six - ninety two sixty two. https://americanfinancing.net/golden Call American Financing today to find out how customers are saving an avg of $800/mo. 866-886-9262 or visit http://www.AmericanFinancing.net/Golden, NMLS 182334, nmlsconsumeraccess.orgDrive Fast All Gas Giveaway - Enter to win my Custom 800+ Horsepower RAM TRX + $10K cash: https://drivefastallgas.com/collections/new-releasesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Agent Nate Russo returns in Oracle III, Murder at the Grandview, the latest installment of the gripping Audible original series. When a reunion at an abandoned island hotel turns deadly, Russo must untangle accident from murder. But beware, something sinister lurks in the Grandview shadows. Joshua Jackson delivers a bone-chilling performance in the supernatural thriller that will keep you on the edge of your seat. Don't let your fears take hold of you as you dive into this addictive series.

Love thrillers with a paranormal twist? The entire Oracle trilogy is available on Audible. Listen now on Audible. We're friends that laugh. We're friends that shout. Sometimes we don't know what we're talking about But that won't stop us Nothing can stop us Ooh, yeah It's like a show you used to love

Just rebranded enough It's stronger, better, bigger power, cause it is the golden hour. It's the golden hour. How you doing, Eric? I'm good. I mean, he's got his outfit on. I don't. Well, who made that shirt?

I don't know. What little company sent you that shirt? Yeah, yeah. What stupid company sent you this shirt? Reverse descent. It's actually cool. I like their stuff. Yeah pray for us Did you steal that from fucking show one day and they were like, nah, they're great. We're our shirt They're just like we're big fans Okay, you know go to the Gary for us is the gap a fan go to the gap night

This is a nice polo I have on. I don't like the gap. The Polo, the Polo does look better on Eric than that. Then last week that shirt would retire that shirt. What was the last one? It's because Rachel doesn't want to use fabric softener. Oh, wow. Yeah, it's a nightmare. So what does that have to do with you not wearing wait, what? I don't understand my No, my shirt's getting messed up. Oh no no no, they're ugly. Why does my headphones have this big freaking, why does mine look weird?

Oh dude. Like they're made for like a bigger person. You know why? Because you have a fucking peanut head. We just figured it out. My shit looks good. You're a peanut head. I'm not a peanut head dude, I have a big forehead, you should say that.

Hey! You don't come in here late with your stupid t-shirt on talking shit about what I'm wearing and telling me about my peanut head. I'm not a peanut head, dude. I have a big forehead. You can say that. You don't come in here late with your stupid t-shirt on, talking shit about what I'm wearing and tell me about my peanut head. But that's exactly the kind of defense I run. But Chris, what are you going to do if you're in the coffee shop and someone goes, pray for who? I go like this.

Oh, bro, I don't know what. I just, somebody told me. It's like wearing a sports shirt. It's like you're wearing a Raiders shirt. You go, you went to the Raiders. You're like, nah, it to me. It's like wearing a sports shirt. It's like you're wearing like a Raiders shirt. You went to the Raiders, you're like, nah, it's a nice black shirt. Yeah, nah, I'm a gang member from the 80s. Instead of that.

You could just say, I don't know, pick somebody. Yeah, you, bro. I pray for you. Pray for us. This is for you. Take this shirt, I give it to him, and I walk out fucking bare chested, and I look great doing it.

Dude, did I, can kind of you fight question. Did Jake Paul just have a fight? I know. I for some reason I missed that too. Like it must be no one cares anymore then, right? Because that just kind of came and went and I was like, what happened? Yeah, I think he miscalculated because he went against a big UFC pay-per-view. Then he also fought a guy in Julio Chavez Jr. who hasn't fought in four years.

So people and there was like no marketing for it. So I think people were just like, I'm good. I also fought a guy in Julio Chavez Jr. who hasn't fought in four years. So people, and there was like no marketing for us. I think people were just like, I'm good. But wait, so I got a question, Brendan, who do you think paid for Askren's lungs? I don't know. I know, he had double lung transplant. I don't know, dude, that's a good question.

Some donor. What are you guys talking about? Some donor donated two, it's this fighter, because I bring this up because he fought, Jake Paul is one of the first fights Jake Paul did. Yeah, there you go, Chris. He needed two lungs and his insurance denied him and someone gave him two million dollars, a donor.

And some people think it's Jake Paul, some people think it's... The Tate brothers. The Tate brothers, some people think it's me. It's just, it's somebody. Hey, hey. Some people think it's me. brothers, the tape brothers. Some people think it's me. It's just, it's somebody. Hey, some people think it's me. No one thinks it's you. Well, I'm just saying it could be anyone, right?

It could be. I could have done one long and someone could have done another one. It could be anyone, but zero people think it's you. Well, dude, what I'm saying is- If I had to put money on it, if I had to put money on it, I would assume it was Jake Paul because he talked talked about it and he's that type of dude. But then also Ben Askren is so involved in the wrestling community,

what people don't understand is that wrestling community has money, man. Like there's a lot of wrestlers, because their work ethic have gone on to run Fortune 500 companies. It could have been why I was late today. Some of the richest dudes I know. Because I was paying for one of the lungs,

but- Oh my God. I'm not saying it is but I'm not saying I'm not saying it is it I'm not saying that but zero people think that. Somebody did it and we don't know who. You're telling me that did the insurance just says to this guy yeah bro yeah you're gonna die sorry. Well because that though that you know because they'll be like well are you gonna fight more because we don't want to give you lungs if you're just gonna fight more and waste them. It's true though.

But also, it was like an interview. It could be. It could have been. Maybe. You have more scheduled fights and they went, oh, here's the thing. But here's the thing. What if he got a smoker's lungs? Like, dude, give me at least an athletic person's lungs.

Dude, this isn't a used car dealership situation. It kind of is. You're not getting new lungs. You're getting fucking someone else's lungs. Yeah, but they gotta be healthy lungs. No, you're getting what we got. You're not going to get aged lungs. You know what I mean? No, you're getting a loner. You're getting a loner.

You're getting what we got. You might get some big fat lady. You know? That is just so crazy. What if you get two of the same, or you get one from someone and one from another one? I, I feel a Martin Lawrence movie coming. One lung from this guy, one lung from that guy. Stupid. Yeah. Look at this, one year survival rate, 90%.

All right, three years survival rate. Oh God, it's tough. Five years survival rate. Wait, what's the stats on the lung transplant? Is it not good? No, it's not. Yeah, what's what's the stats on the lung? So is it not good? No, it's not Fuck ten years survival about 33% Oh Reach the 10 year man. Where's the oh my god?

You know, like you supposed I thought they were gonna do a thing when you get a clone your own parts But it's yeah. Well, that's me. He's watching the sixth day. He just watched the sixth day with Arnold Schwarzenegger So he's a little bit no, no, no. He just watched the sixth day with Arnold Schwarzenegger, so he's a little bit. No, no, no, you just watched it because you just pulled that reference. No, I see. I got a database, dude. That movie is so bad.

And he shoots. It is one of the terrible movies. You remember it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. He shoots the alligator and he says, you're luggage. Like he just turned it into luggage. That's when he was like. Also he shoots an alligator, you know?

But Running Man was like. In a building. In that vibe. No, no, no, no, that's crazy. Running Man is more of a classic movie than Sixth Day, dude. Classic. Fucking dude. I met that alligator. Yeah, yeah.

I use that alligator now on the road. I'm not kidding. Oh, you're not? Gabe gave it to Arnold Schwarzenegger and we recorded at his office. Whoa. You know that alligator. Yeah, it was a stuffed rubber thing. That's hilarious.

It's the one from the sixth day. Yeah. Slight flex by Nicholas. That's like, speaking of sixth day, that's like six degrees of separation right there. Yeah, it's like that alligator's basically Kevin Bacon. That's amazing. Bro, let me just say something. How about Nick from the back goes I know that alligator. Yeah I know I know like a hoe like some hoe. You know what I mean? Oh I know him.

No you don't you fucking hoe. Suck my dick, Nick. Nick, some podcast? Oh, yeah. Just suck my dick, dude. Your arm candy. Oh, I interviewed them. I know that alligator. You're fucking stupid, O. I was running audio. I was running audio on that podcast. I'm friends with that alligator.

Dude. Nick's a slut. It's not even, that's like a, he's like a six. That's not even like, he's not even like, I met Arnold Schwarzenegger. He's like, I know the alligator, it was stuffed, but I know him.

Dude, how about, there it is, there it is. Wow, there it is. Look, Nick's friend. How about that's your legacy, dude? The fucking alligator, you just gotta sign a Theo Von sign up on the side of you, you're dead alligator. You just got a sign a Theo von sign up on this on the side of you You're dead under a pool table. How about that fucking? How about that fucking legacy? Who'd have thought this alligator beats such a fucking hit the most famous alligator I that Nick knows I'll tell you that much

The one from happy Gilmore's probably number two. Oh yeah. Oh, good call. Well now that this has a second, you know, with Theo's podcast, this has a, what do you call it? New Life? John Travolta in Pulp Fiction. It's coming out again, dude, you know?

Hell yeah, that was a big comeback. It's not just Welcome Back Cotter. I'm sorry for bringing it so hard early on. No, you needed to. Well, we'll get tired. I know we'll get tired and we'll do the pockets is an hour. But I guess looking forward to this. One thing's for sure.

If you go like this, Dalia showed up late, but at least, you know, he did bring it when he got here he fucking He hit the ground. That's a fair point. Yeah, that's a fair point I like a diva wide receiver that you show up late, but you perform right right right right right Speaking of which a B's been going crazy. I'm gonna say you're Antonio Brown. I haven't seen it. I haven't seen it What are you tweets from him, and I was like Jesus Christ. What's he talking about? Did he? No, I don't know. Didn't he leave the country and it was like, no more child

support from me. Yeah, but he's just being silly, isn't he? This is a guy who's going to run out of money. Oh, dude. There's no way. You could run real fast, but you're going to run real fast out of money, too. This is a 30 for 30 waiting to happen

There's not even he's not even getting 30 for 30 when he has his realtor's license. Yeah. Yeah I mean, it's like come on down, you know to a B. Yeah Cuz it's just there's no way how can you cuz a dude it made a lot of money is worth a lot of money, right? Yeah, but you do here's one of the top five How yeah, but you in his playing days you're talking about he was all pro for a number of years I mean top five talent in the last fucking 20 years monster. Yeah monster 36 okay a lot, but I don't know man. Nah. Yeah, I mean look No, I think I think that that kind of money runs out. Well, it runs out of your What's he got? What's he worth? Fuck off 80 million. What is it more than that?

Yeah, you can't trust this shit. Really? Yeah, you can't trust this stuff. Yeah Also, who knows cuz he filed for bankruptcy, but it could be a file of one of his businesses, you know Remember when 50 cent file for bankruptcy and And it was like, oh, fuck. And then it's like, oh no, he's so rich, though. What is that? That's when you realize how stupid people are. I know, I know. You're like, oh no, it's chapter 11, you fucking idiots.

Yeah. That was so aggressive, I'm sorry. It's too bad Antonio Brown tried to murder someone with a firearm, though, because that's, they're gonna- No, those guys jumped him. Those guys jumped him. I know, we're gonna see what happened. But speaking of which, falsely accused. I guess Diddy's free. Dude, the fuck is- No, those guys jumped him. Those guys jumped him. I know, we're gonna see what happened. But speaking of which, falsely accused,

I guess Diddy's free. Dude, the fucking- No, he's not. No, no, I know. They didn't give him bail. Well, he is on the hard stuff. But were those courtroom sketches real? Yeah.

He really dropped to his knees? Yeah. Wow, dude. Hell yeah, dude, he was facing life in prison, but- He was facing like 50 years. Over some bullshit. Over some bullshit. It's no judgment, it's just, I would have been on the ground already. You guys facing like 50 years. Over some bullshit. I'm not. Over some bullshit. God damn it, Chris.

It's no judgment. It's just, I would have been on the ground. You can't piss in a mouth. Already. I would have been waiting on the ground. I'm gonna hit my head, so I'm just gonna go down. This is the thing that I don't understand. Well, I understand it, but I think it's crazy

that in a case like this and the government's involved, and they give everyone immunity, except for this guy. It's crazy. Like to me, it's bananas. So the hookers get off, all the other people that fuck the hookers get off, and then this guy is the one, that shit's bananas to me. It's nuts, it's like that one,

I mentioned it last time, but the Ken and Barbie murders, they gave this, it was a husband and a wife, the wife. They gave, they gave this, uh, th it was a, uh, husband and a wife, the wife, you saw this? Yeah. The wife, they gave the wife like 10 years, a lenient sentence because they wanted to get the husband. The wife was like, at least 50% of it. Yeah. Yeah. She was, she was just as guilty. Like eight years or something. Hey, Eric,. Hey, Eric, here's my question is what was all this about? You know what I'm saying? Because they know going in, they didn't find shit. They obviously leaked the Cassie video to get the public on their side. Obviously he's a bad dude, but when it comes to the

Rico and all that shit, like what was this really about? Because they look like assholes now. I think that the prosecution was, you know, going for their legacy. They were going for like, you know, let's really go for this guy and how can we get him? Because there were so many. But why? And there were so many. And another thing too is I think that like the local,

because it should have been a local charges. It should have been state charges. It should have been the New York, the New York public attorney, whatever, district attorney should say, let's go for these things. But when they went federal with it, the only things you can charge someone with

are RICO and sex trafficking and these kind of things. And so this was a thing that was just hard to prove from the beginning. All the experts from the beginning were saying, like, RICO? Rico Rico with one guy Right, right. You know what I mean? But it but here's what's weird is we heard all these horrible stories about Diddy all this stuff The FBI everyone looked all into it. It's all rumors. No

You know this car freak freak offs but rumors dude. Here's the thing though You cannot keep something like that quiet. Like if you were at a party and you just casually no diddy, you're at a party and people are doing weird shit, pictures would have came out, people would be talking about this. You're saying it, yeah, right. All that freak off shit was bullshit.

All of it. What is the freak off shit? What is that? I'm saying the Freak Offs were just him and his girls. Oh right, right, right. And wasn't like Beyonce and Jay-Z and like, you know what I mean? And Will Smith and all these people. Like none of that shit was real. That was just like, sadly it was black Twitter.

I mean not just black Twitter though. No, but it started there and then went, you know. It always starts with black Twitter. I mean, not just black Twitter though. Nobody started there. Right. Right. Right. You know, but it always starts with black Twitter. All right, kids, let's take a little break from all the shenanigans here at the golden hour, nothing beats relaxing on a hot summer day, watching baseball.

It's one of my favorite things to do. I don't miss a Dodgers game. They're in a slump right now, but all good. You know, they're going to turn it around. Our, our, our pitching staff is injured. You got T Oscars out right now. Don't sweat it. My boy, Kike Hernandez got hurt.

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And he blew up my car. And then the prosecutor's like, really? Did you see him do it? He's like, no. My thing is, my thing is that- That was still part of the case though. You know what, by the way, just real quick, Chris, cause I thought the same thing, cause they dropped the arson charge and I thought the arson charge they dropped was the kid Cuddy.

They actually didn't drop that part of it. It was some other arson thing. But even still, it was a lot of he say, she said. So this guy comes in and he testifies or whoever testified and then they look and go, oh, you know what? We don't got enough. Let's just drop some of this stuff. That's unfair because the jury heard it.

You think, I just can't wait till Diddy is gonna be one, you know, he's gonna be out. And then he's- Redemption tour. No, not even that. He's gonna be, the moment's gonna happen where it dawns on him, where he's like, fuck, I need baby oil.

And he's gonna have to go get it. And he's gonna, it's gonna be like buying condoms when you're 16, you're like, yeah, Twix and this and then also that, whatever that is. And now he knows not to send you when he's gotta do it himself. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Imagine you're the guy going like this.

Doop. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Doop. And then. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Imagine you're the guy going like this. Doop. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Doop. And then. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Doop. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

Just with the baby oil and the thing. He's just doop. Yeah. No, but here's the thing. I think they're going to do the sentencing. They're saying October, which is crazy. They're not letting them Didn't give him bail if they didn't but you know what though, I think that's gonna benefit him Let's say they don't yeah, because then it's gonna be like time served. Yeah, it's gonna be time served

I think it's gonna be time served maybe house arrest or something. He's gonna get out and the prosecution those people look stupid Yeah, all the, all the tax money, Rico charges, like they're treating him like he was Al Capone. He's like, dude, I fucked a couple of guys and pissing some mouths. What are we doing here? So I had come eating off of my nipples. It doesn't mean I'm Thanos. Yeah.

But the problem is, is like, if it was thick boy, it's like, if, you know, if, uh, Brendan sent chin to get some, you know, that now was Thicc Boy, it's like if Brendan sent Chin to get some, now they can go, oh, it's Rico, Thicc Boy is a criminal organization. You know what I mean? It's like, that's what they tried to do. Chin got the nipple cum, get him. That's what they tried to do.

Chin, do you want immunity? Then say Brendan ate nipple cum. I imagine, though, they do that. That's the thing. Yeah. That's what they do. But this is the reason why he couldn't call in a witness. Because I'm pretty sure he could have called in a hooker

who was like, yeah, I had a good time. Cassie had a good time. She was like, I tore her up. You can't do- Imagine on the stand. I tore her up. I tore her up. That's what, but what I'm saying is

cause that person would have immunity. Sir, did you have a good time? I tore it up. None of his witnesses had immunity. So they were like, I'm not gonna go incriminate myself as a hooker. Oh. That's the thing.

So all the prosecutions hookers were like, okay, you're not gonna go to jail. We need some defense hookers in there that was like, yeah. Defense hooker. What if they had some of the male escorts and like how'd he go with Cassie? He goes, turned it down. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

What if it was that guy? That guy just comes out. You know, they asked me to do it. I'm just so glad. Did he offer me 35 million, buddy? I'm so glad I never went to one of those parties, bro. Yeah, I don't think you were invited. No, no, no, no.

I mean. But you could have been. Chris, you know what's the crazy part? I don't think you were invited. No, no, no, no. But you could have been. Chris, you know what's the crazy part? I don't care what anybody says. 10 years ago, if somebody was like, just casually, hey man, we're about to go to this Diddy party, everybody would have gone.

Everybody would have went. Okay, you know what I mean? So what are we talking about? No, I get it, yeah, just because you're there doesn't mean you're fucking, you know. Well, I don't think anybody's doing that. Remember how they got you and remember the main thing with Diddy

was remember his big white party. Right. Remember everybody went to the white party and then it gets late and turns into the freak off. I don't think it ever turned into the freak off in the way that this is happening. Yeah, maybe there was some rooms and people were like the, like the Playboy Mansion.

Probably the Playboy Mansion. Probably the Playboy Mansion was worse. Well, you remember when I made that joke when Hugh Hefner, when they were like, oh, because he died in like 2020. My favorite joke. Oh, he just missed me too. When he was like, oh, look for him.

They're doing what? Oh. Oh. Yeah. That guy died just in time. Yeah, oh, time. Yeah. Yeah. I mean that guy, dude, they would've got, he would've got, have you ever looked into the playboy mansion? They're there. Like some of them bitches died. They just took him out.

Like now they're making documentaries about Hugh Hefner and it's like, dude, why he's already dead. Yeah. Oh, I like the, I like the, the just the broth of young chicks are like, yeah, he used to make us get in there and it'd be one after the other. And we'd have to tickle his balls. It's like, yeah, the, just the broth of young chicks are like, yeah, he used to make us get in there and it'd be one after the other. And we'd have to tickle his balls. It's like, yeah, bitch, you're living in the mansion. It ain't rent free. Dude, it, you know, what drives me nuts is the fucking, this is what drives me nuts. This is what drives me nuts.

This is along those lines. What about, okay. Now I understand what, uh, a lot of these Hollywood producers do is shitty and you know, hey, suck my dick and you can get this job, right? Okay, I get that that sucks, all right? And that sucks for women and that's bullshit, okay? Nobody, nobody has come after the women that have actually done that. That actually sucked dick to get into Mad Max or whatever the fuck.

And how about how you are taking jobs from women? How about how you, because of that, are being shitty to women, right? Argue with that. Yeah, it's a tough thing. a tough it's like you oh so you you did it too you took part in that but it's just the producers faults no i get how the producers are wrong fuck them but what about the women that are now in movies because they fucking what was that one What was that one? Is it like a yeesh?

It touched the back of the throat. What about all the women that work hard? What about the powerful women that deserve jobs? Because you fucking... But let me say it differently. You'll be held accountable too. No, I hear you, but I think the bigger deal is the fact that for like okay So these powerful these ones made it. Yeah, okay. Yeah, the issue really becomes that they didn't say anything to those

Lower level women who had to have up with some shit So what I'm saying is like they could have stopped it like like I was like like that too is like Like if this happened to Angelina Jolie if this happened to what's her name? Like I was like, like that too is like, or maybe, maybe, maybe they did say something. Like if this happened to Angelina Jolie, if this happened to, uh, what's her name? If this happened to these people, they waited 10, 15 years and now they're like, yeah, yeah, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. It's like, whoa, no, no, no, no. Those girls aren't saying anything, but to your point, those girls, they're not saying shit. I know, I know. And they're part of the problem too. They're like, they're part

of the problem. But also buddy, you don't, you're telling me no one was like, girl, I sucked that thing. So good. I'm Catwoman. Yeah, forget it. Forget it, dude. Are you kidding me? We was in his room and I was all night right here. Girl, I ate his ass and I'm Catwoman. Speaking of Charlize Theron, she was just on Call Her Daddy saying she fucked a 26 year old.

And I was excited about it, you wanna hear it? Yeah, I do. She's a big girl. Yeah, she's tall. She's tall. I saw her on Ryre the other day. Yeah, nice. Swiped right.

Ooh, slip in there, Kev. I'm trying, I swiped right, but we'll see what happens. Well. Oh, I know how you can get in. You know what you're ruining it. Dude, that Tom Hardy's a dick. Go back. What about Tom Hardy?

Her and Tom Hardy hate each other. Something must be wrong with her. She can't keep a man. She must be a real bitch. What a cunt. She's easy on the eyes. You just got to make sure she doesn't get older and turn into the... Remember she made that monster movie?

A guy. I'm having the kind of sex I never had in my 20s or in my 30s. We should be the ones that are like, fuck you. Like I'm gonna have a hard time. She has to be mid 50s or single as fuck, fucking 26 year olds. And it was really fucking amazing.

There's a casting. That was it I guess. Oh wait, wait, hold on a second. Let me do what they do. Okay. He's a baby. Yeah, I know. He's a baby.

I know. I can't believe, he's a child, I know. He's a baby. I know. He's a child. I can't believe you did that. I know. It's fucking so ridiculous. Yeah, you know what I mean? It's like, what are we talking about? That poor guy's gonna need years of therapy.

The double standard is real right there. And I say to her like this, yeah, go get it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Go get it. You know what I mean? Bro, have you guys seen some of these teachers coming out, going to prison for fucking the kids? Good.

Where were these teachers when I was a kid? They're like fucking hot, man. My teachers were fucking warlocks. Go to jail. Fuck off. I hate that shit. That's so annoying, dude. I know those poor 16-year-old boys.

What are they going to do? Well, no. That's the thing, dude. I know those poor 16 year old boys. What are they going to do? Well, no, that's the thing. It's maybe it's, maybe it's traumatizing to them. Maybe it isn't either way. It's illegal. Go to fucking jail. Right. Yeah. I don't, I, you know, I don't do the laws, the law dude, you know? Yeah. It's like, it's annoying. Yeah, man. It's, but I just, that's like, you know, you know what I mean? It's like, I hate that you, you see that. And then, you know, all just that's like, you know, you know what I mean? It's like I hate you you see that and then you know all our thoughts like as a dude you see her say that We go. Yeah, we get it Yeah, you would have fucked her if you were 26

And you'd be 40 you'd be 50 now and you'd be like, yeah, I'm glad I did it Society wouldn't be like to get maybe you're they fucking made you do this and then you fucking it's such horse shit. You're 25 years old you do it you're 26 years old you're doing fucking you're an adult. Yeah I always say just like if it's such an issue then just raise the age of consent to 30. Yeah sure do that then it's illegal after before 30. You know what I mean? Like make it like, if you're 20 or make the age gap illegal or something. You know what I mean? But it's just like, but that's all like a, you know, a

pretend virtue signal. That's another one there. Sure it is. Unless, you know, until like, you know, look what's going on with Jared Leto. I don't know if he actually did that shit or not, but like, but it's like, you know, until like, you know, look what's going on with Jared Leto. I don't know if he actually did that shit or not, but like, but it's like, you know, uh, they gonna what's going to happen with that? I mean, is it, did it? I don't think I, this is my thing. Okay. This let's relate this to the Diddy case for instance.

So, you know, the court of public opinion and the internet was saying, Oh man, oh man, this dude was doing a bunch of stuff. And then when it gets into the actual legal system, none of that stuff's real. There are no tapes. Here's another example, the FBI guy that was on Joe Rogan's podcast, he was like, if you think we had tapes of people doing things on Epstein Island, you don't think we would go after, you know, so what I'm saying is like,

we don't really know what's going on. And so in terms of this Leto thing is like, this is just an internet thing for now. People, whatever they're saying, and if they can't, you know, if they're pursuing, if they're pursuing it, if they have evidence, then they're gonna get them, cause that's what they do. That's what they do.

The government comes in, they investigate, just like Danny Masterson. Okay, he got accused, they went to court, he got arrested, he's now in jail. That's how it works. I wonder how Leto is feeling right now. He's probably feeling terrible. Is it all over Twitter?

I don't know, I don't have from God. You know what I mean? Is it all over Twitter? I don't know. I don't have fucking idea. You know what? Things come so fast. It kind of died down. Yeah. It comes so fast that who even knows. I just wonder what Tron will be like and what if they're going to replace him with Tignitaro

or some shit or whatever the fuck. You know what I mean? But I wonder what they'll do with like, he's got he's got two movies he's supposed to be Skeletor and also You know, it's funny as I watched that movie just so in my mind I can envision this is how you would have done it. Yeah, I'll tell you right now. I killed that movie, bro. I really did.

But whatever dudes, I got a role. Okay, I got a role dudes. I love you. Bye, bro. Love you, bro. Good to see you. So you know, a little break here and we'll jump right back in the episode. Quince is my jam. They have the kind of stuff you're actually going to wear on repeat.

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Oh, they should, they should, you know what? I bet you there's like, they should just release it. Yeah, I mean. That'll be fun. Whatever. We should get it. You know? Who the fuck would watch that at that point? Nobody liked that movie.

And it did well. Should do it. They should. That's the reason why they should release it. Yeah. To get like, oh, man, this is so much better. I'd be hilarious. But I don't know what's going on with that guy, man. Who knows? Nothing's. Yeah. Yeah. Who is this again? Oh, Drake.

Yo, I. When you got this kind of I didn you know. Yeah, yeah, who knows. Who is this again? Oh, Drake. Drake. Yo, I. When you got this kind of on you. I didn't know I had the same, first of all I didn't know I had the same chest tattoo as Drake. But I don't know if those are real or not. And here's. What do you mean you don't know if they're real?

Here's my whole thought about this, okay? If you get... If they're not real, where can I get them? Fake. That's what I wanna know. Yeah, on Drake, bro. If you get fake abs or if you get etching, ab etching, whatever the fuck, okay?

Ab etching? Yeah, it's something, I looked it up. Had a whole conversation on chat GPT with it. Yeah. If it's a real, if he did this, because they're saying like, where, where are his arms, where's the chest, where the shoulders, he's not out of shape by any means, he looks good, right? But they're saying that his abs wouldn't be that cut when his arms are like that.

And I don't know if that's true or not He could have done this in the morning and you know in the morning you're a little flabby Absolutely, I mean, this is why you don't take pictures unless you do some push-ups and stuff. No, no, it's totally but my point is the audacity of him getting fake abs and Taking a picture like this and putting it online as if it's not fake abs is so astronomical that it's hard to believe that he actually did that. It's diabolical. Yeah.

It's hard to believe that he actually did it. So I'm going to give him the benefit of the doubt that those are real. Even though they do look, it looks a little odd. Do you understand what I'm saying? Does everyone get what I'm saying? It looks odd because of the lack of chest definition and then this arm part right here. Right, yeah. He doesn't, you know what I mean?

Sure, yeah. No, I just think there's something weird about this part right here not matching the, you know. But maybe his body just is designed to. I know, I know, I know. You know what I mean? Like abs are like, it takes two years or something to get abs like this.

I remember Usher was talking about that. He was like, if you wanna get abs like this, it's a full two year commitment of do whatever. And it goes away quick. Oh yeah. You know what I mean? Because you have to like, I gotta eat chicken breasts every day

and you know, you know. Go just, okay, move the picture to the right. And so we just see his arms arm, his arm. I just want to see his arm without the abs. Yeah. Like if you saw these, that's just a kind of a, that's my arm. Wait, wait. Like if you just saw this, yeah, that's the game. The game is like, does this guy have abs? You would go, no. You go no, and then you're going, what? Even with showing a little bit of chest

and a little bit of stomach there, you would be like, nah, there's no way this guy, what? You know, then you'd see it, you're like, get out of here. And you know, you know, you know Drake is eating shit late night. You know this dude isn't like, no, I think he's like, yo, this is Cain's chicken you know this Cain's chicken. Not trying to be racist. I think he knows he's um what he is and he has to like, this is I'm no Drake hate no Drake hate but you know I wonder about this yeah I like Drake so that it's corny when people are

like fuck Drake you know it's well can we see other examples of abs and big Sean right yeah yeah there's got to be that again that's never been confirmed. You know, I know people went nuts. I don't know. Like this, this, everything about this, it looks like he's giving birth to abs. Like he's like pregnant with abs. This is just, this is just a guy you would see outside somewhere. Like if he had a sign that said like, you know, like it's like, this looks like one of one of those like you know African commercials where they're like you know for just 60 cents a day you can help this rapper. This is a this is a this is a this is a mess right here. You know nobody would say he's not handsome but this is just. Yeah this is a lot. This is just he also he's five seven. Yeah

Which is just every what it's got me other examples of like maybe there's a yeah Maybe there's some guy who's like he's the ab guy, you know His whole thing is like you don't need arms. You don't need chest, but I could get your ass Well, there's ab you know, there's ab etching which is not to me If you do that, it's corny, but that's not, to me, that's not getting fake abs. You're getting specific liposuction. Well, maybe if you had the Bruce Lee machine on

and you were just working your abs and it just did that. You know what I'm saying? So look up other instances of AB. See if we can. Yeah, this is great. You know, like actual not just celebrities, but like people who get it that have admitted it. Yeah. This way we can see it. Can you look up AB etching?

There's got to be some. Yeah, you can. I had a whole conversation with Chachi BD. There's got to be a picture. There's got to be like a company that does it. But yeah, Kevin said this example of Taraji P. Henson okay so that looks like makeup I mean to me that looks like it's shading yeah like she obviously doesn't have abs she's thicker that's crazy that that actually looks weird I it's not hot to me it's weird that she shaded herself this is

like a very good but I also under Taraji, I, I, I, Taraji P. Griffin. Oh, okay, here we go. Nick's about to do the, the, the, the, the, the,

the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the,

the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, When somebody's over 40 and they work on just a specific part of their body, I can see them

looking like that. I do, I'm a penis. I can see them looking like that. No, no, not that. If you're in your 20s. This one's crazy, sorry. The third one from the right on the top. That one's crazy.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, from the right. Although that one was crazy too. This is... come on. Oh, that's disgusting. Look at under it. Look at, you know his dick is so gross. Dude, you could tell his dick is. Chris, this looks like aliens.

Like a monster is about to come out of this person's belly. That looks very weird. This is what it looks like. That's crazy. Oh, I will say this though. That's crazy, but get the number. What's the place? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know. No I know. No I know. Dude I want to tell you something though. Can we start a GoFundMe to get this for me? That looks weird however it looks way better on the right.

Even though. No no but dude but then look down. No no but you get the side angle that picture above even that one looks crazy the one below that looks ridiculous. By the way this all sorts of fucked up. You get the side angle, no, no, the picture above, even that one looks crazy, the one below, that looks ridiculous. By the way, this is Drake. Go down. Wow, crazy. I wish it showed one with his dick too. Like, I wish it showed a wider shot with his dick too

so we could see the whole business. Dude, that's big or small? Dude, it looks like. It's a mess. Whatever it is, it's bad. Dude, he looks like a home plate umpire. You know what I mean? That's hilarious.

That's hilarious. That's such a- Where he's just like, strike! Yeah. Yeah. Ah! Yeah. And it looks like he has a pillow with his fucking- Okay, now go to the white guy.

The white guy that you went to earlier. The guy you thought, like that looks so fake. So it's fat, they just like mold the fat. That's disgusting. Is that what it is? Oh no, oh I don't Oh, I don't know. I don't know. I mean, I did have a conversation with Chad GBD.

I think that what they do is they do liposuction on the parts that are supposed to be cut. But it just seems like he wouldn't have muscles that- It sure does look like that. Big. Yeah, that doesn't even look like muscles. Yeah, that looks like they put a plate on him. That looks crazy.

Like, here's the thing. Honestly, he looks like a fucking Donatello, the Ninja Turtle. Yeah. No, no, no. This is what I don't understand. This Alvana plastic surgery place is using that picture. Right, that's the good version. As the sales point.

That's the good version. That's crazy. Hey, hey, that looks terrible. It looks way better than the left though, come on. Does it? I don't know. Just have a dad bod, not a lumpy dad bod. I know.

Dad bod to rad bod. There you go, where's my money? Ivana, dad bod to rad bod. That looks crazy. Do you wanna be an umpire and not wear any equipment? Silly man umpire not wearing any equipment The doctors like okay good good good good. This is good. So this is shaping up nicely. Do me a favor say see you're right Great natural this guy's like a natural hockey goalie.

Is that what that is? Like that looks crazy. Yeah, that's a beetle. Yeah, it looks like Liver King, yeah. This guy's going to be threatening Joe Rogan in no time. You're telling me that this is better than just eating better. Well, it's way easier. And is it though?

Because how do you maintain this? Like how long does this last before you have to go back in for another session? This is ridiculous. This is like, this is like, this is stomach fucking, what is it? Lip filler? Oh yeah, yeah.

No, what's that stuff? Or Botox. This is just belly Botox. Collagen. This is disgusting. Whatever it is, it's disgusting. It's disgusting looking. I just don't think that looks good.

This should not be the sales picture. I don't see anybody going to this and being like, ooh, that's what it can look like. Maybe the upper ones are all right, but the lower ones with the lower one looks great. The middle part. You know what the problem is is we could see he's still just as fat. That's the issue. It's the under part is just a, oh yeah, that's just, you know, I gotta see is just a. Oh yeah that's just a mess. You know I gotta see his dick. Now you gotta pull that out.

I gotta see that guy's dick. I gotta see his dick. Email them see if I can see his dick. No no you have the chat. Can't you have the video thing like finish the picture. Oh yeah but Chachipiti won't do nudity dude. Oh that sucks. I tried to say show Chris D'Alea nude,

and they go, we can't. I go, but I'm him. Oh, they have, but they have other. It's okay, I give my consent. They have other apps now. I know, but what are they? They have other apps, you know, when you're on the road and you throw on Pornhub by accident,

and the commercial comes up for, get your AI girl, we'll do anything. I've seen that. And it's just like cum splattered We'll do anything. I've seen that. And it's just like cum splattered on a cartoon face. I've seen that. But I will say though, a lot of times those women look dope. I know that's what I'm saying. And because they're designed to look dope and women are in trouble, porn women are in trouble because...

Oh yeah. No, no, no, you know what? Bro. Good riddance to that industry. Bro. You know what I'm saying? I understand you still wanna, I understand you still wanna see a real person do it, but bro.

I don't know if you do. No, no, if you don't know if they're real or not. Right. Yeah. No, I get it, bro. Yeah. All right, let's take a little break here because it's a big deal, golden hour fans,

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it's like that's sort of what OnlyFans was supposed to be, is like you have this connection with this person. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then it turns out that it's not even really that person anyway, it's some dude who's like running the thing. But now if you're saying you go into a computer thing and you go, alright, I a Asian big ass titties, but she's ginger, I need the legs thick.

I need her like five. The phone just breaks. I need her like five, 11. You know what? We can't even do this. You know what? Add another titty just because. With no attitude.

What? Yeah, let's total recall this. Yeah. You know what I mean? It just, you know. You go, and she's interesting. The computer just goes, whoosh. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha video game loves when I play video games. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

We have to kill you. Big ass titties. You already said that. I just want to make sure you understand. And when I said quiet, I mean quiet. What I'm saying is like agreeable. OK, so what I'm saying is what's like we should do a poll like you have your computer generated perfect, whatever you think is. I know what or is or you know Sally

from Wisconsin who moved to Florida to the realness of it which one is like do you think you know well what you're talking about porn yeah porn or like no what what process do you because now you could put your girl in the same kind of porn yeah now when you finish with her, you're like, all right, let's have three. And indistinguishable from each other. It looks real. Totally. Because now you could be like, hey, let's have three black dudes come in right now and

go to town. And tear it up. You know what I mean? Hey, hey. You know what I mean? Yep. Yep. So what I'm saying Hey, hey, you know what I mean? Yep, yep, yep. You know what I'm saying? So what I'm saying is like, what's the-

The realness I think a lot of people would have a problem with, but it's not a real person. I, okay, well that's- If you don't know. That's crazy to me though. Well, no, because- I think you feel, no, but is that the reason, okay, is that the reason why people watch porn?

I don't know. I think people- No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, not everybody, and not all the time. But think I do think though like look for instance there's a reason why amateur porn is popular and in a way more popular than produced porn because it's like oh this is a real situation that really happened with two people that aren't necessarily porn stars. Oh yeah, yeah, that stepsister and brother.

Eric's getting hard. But the point is, both of them can be hot to the same person, but I think the realness of an amateur porn, people go like, oh, all right. You feel like you're a voyeur. It's a visual thing. It's a visual thing. If it's produced, you go, this is hot visually.

But if it's if it's the pizza guy showing up and you're like, I think this is real. You go extra brachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachachach Yeah, yeah,'t know those machines I'll tell you what man Cuz that's all you need So if you had VR, how about this? This is the future of porn You're gonna you make your thing that you want and you're putting on your VR You're connecting your dick to your like in the slot thing and your coop and you're just sitting there and you're gonna you make your thing that you want and you're putting on your VR you're connecting your dick to your like in the slot thing and you're

coop and you're just sitting there and you're thinking it's just like you're experiencing this thing I mean that's the future of it I just think that you can get something to go in your ass if that's what you like well that's what you're not for me but you might well you brought it up though no I'm just saying I like options but I don't want that. I like to say no to some things You just go offer me the anal you're not offering me to get my mouth fucked. I don't want it I want the option So I can go no to that. Have you ever seen that movie the original movie hot girls want it?

It's a movie it's a documentary. Yeah, you should definitely. I've seen it. This shit is so like, I don't know. I mean, when you know, when you hear about that, this is what happens to, to, uh, these girls, you know, they get convinced to go to Florida and then they're like, you know, they're young, they're 19, whatever it is. And then they're like, you know, they, this guy gets them into porn, you know, and then just the like, you know, this guy gets them in the porn, you know? And then just the way they talk and what's happened to them, it was just like crazy. I remember like this one scene that really had me just,

because at first you're like, ooh, and then you're like, oh man. The girl's like, yeah, you know, I just did a cream pie porn and you know, I had to use $80 for the Plan B, but you know, I got paid 120, so I still made, you know, and just the way she's talking about it, I'm like, Oh no. Yeah. You know, they, they like, well, they just basically, I don't know what's the word like, well, groom or indoctrinate or like,

they, they, what, what do they call that? Where they, uh, it's little by little, they just said, and then all of a sudden, well these guys, they, you know, they know that they're not, you know, they're like, they're living in some poverty or where they're living or whatever. They don't want to escape. And the guy's a scumbag. You know what I mean? But, um, but here's the thing too, man, like, you know, like you never see those chat ones where it's like, you know, like webcam stuff? Like, you would think webcam stuff would be even bigger, but there's still a fakeness

to that because it's like, like, you can't, what I'm saying is even, one guy can believe this girl likes you. Oh, no, dudes are idiots. Once it becomes transactional. No, dudes are idiots. Yeah, right. I disagree. No, no, no, no, I, I. Once it becomes transactional. Dudes are idiots. Yeah, right. I disagree.

No, no, no, no. I don't know. I just feel like there's other. I think that the majority of people that if you're just watching porn, it's just you're like, I just want to see this. I need to bust a nut. And I think you'd be OK with knowing that it was like,

no one's really getting hurt here. Watch it. Yeah, right, right, right, right, right. I mean, that's what they do. Sex dolls and all that kind of stuff, it's like that's what getting hurt here. You know what I mean? Yeah, right, right, right, right, right. I mean, that's what they, you know, sex dolls and all that kind of stuff, it's like that's what they should do. You know, Louis has a joke about that, like, you know, for pedophiles and shit like that.

It's like, okay, just give them a little doll. You know what I mean? So it's like they're not hurting anybody and they can get their fucking rocks off with this little fake robot or even on the computer. So like, get rid of child pornography. Right. You know, think of it like that. There's no more child pornography. It's just some weirdo on the thing going like, all right, four, two, you know, you know, it's like, you go, okay, is that what this is going to be for?

So no one gets hurt. That's my thing. It's like I, I've never been in the strip clubs. I was never a strip club guy because I would go into a strip club and immediately I'm Eric Savoho because I'm just thinking to myself, what are you doing here? Why are you doing this? You know, it never got, it never got me going. I know why you're doing this and.

I'm going to end up fucking you. That was me, bro. And I did. Hey, and it's well documented. But anyways, but that's a whole different thing. If they came out, if they came out to a nine inch nails or if they came out to a nine inch nails, or if they came out to what's that song? So Seductive by Tony Yayo, they were mine. I got you.

Is it, are you just paying for it or are you charming them? No, no, no, no. You charm them. I'm incredible, bro. I'm incredible. Some money left in your pocket. Yeah, there's some money. Before that. No, often no.

You never, hey. Often no. Sometimes, yeah, because who cares. Everybody, everybody, hey. No, no, no, I go, I go, dude, I was like when I was in my like, I guess 20s, bro, and I wouldn't even shit, bro. I wasn't even shit, bro, and I would, I mean, dude. I'm different, bro.

I was different. You were built different back then? I was different, bro. And I... You know what, though? I can see you were probably in there aloof, just having fun, not even trying to objectify. Yeah, yeah.

You know, and they were probably like, that's what they were attracted to. Bro, bro, bro. Well, that guy's not making me feel like a hooker prostitute. Thank you. I wasn't going with anyone. It was me. You had an issue.

Oh yeah. It was me. You know what? I had a friend like this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm not gonna say his name. Well, you had two friends like that. No, no, no, no, not two.

No, but my other friend, he went to his strip clubs so much., no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, yo, let's set up a thing. Oh, right, right, right, right. You know what I mean? Here's 500 a week or whatever it is, come to my place. You know what I mean? But what I'm saying is there's something psychological about, you know, everybody wants that. What you're saying, every guy wants that. Every guy wants to go to the strip club and the stripper's like, nah, you don't gotta pay. Take this pussy.

You know what I mean? And that's why they go That's the delusion of it right right right right to your point. You're saying nobody wants to lose that delusion You know that they don't want so they just like when you're on the computer making it they just know it's fake He's texting Kristen to not listen to this She never listens, but uh know it's fake. He's texting Kristen to not listen to this episode. No, no, no, no, no. She never listens. But no, no, I was, yeah.

I understand. But I'm just saying, what you don't understand is, hold on. Should we take a break for a second here? No, no, no, no, no. What you don't understand is, it's just me in there. I go like this. Whoops. Whoops, that's a different one.

I go like this. I'm not, I'm not a, I'm not a psychic. I can't, I can't, there's no metaphysical evidence where you can shape what happens. But I'm, I am different. And this song came on. And history repeats itself. It's happened before.

Darling. He's like this. He's like this. Ask Tino over there. Ask Cinnamon. Darling. Or history repeats itself. Darling. Darling. Darling. History repeats itself. We don't need these anymore. Yeah, I know. But it's nice to hear my voice. Really? Um, history repeats itself. Because then I hear my voice in my ear and I get it. I get it. You're like, oh yeah, if I was, I would go home with this guy.

Take a little break here. My boy, Eric's put on some weight. I'm not going to lie to you. And he talked about it. I said, bud, you need to get you some FitBod. That's right. It's a customized workout just for your big ass. They got you, man.

They got it all. All right. It's an app. So I told Eric, I said, get on some FitBod, man. Creates a personalized workout routine based on your goals, fitness level and available equipment. Maybe you're doing out of your garage. Maybe you got a full blown gym. Whatever you got, FitBod is going to customize a workout just for you. Workouts adapt to your growth. So each workout is challenged enough to push you and make progress. So you're not just staying the same workout all the time. They have a bunch of workouts. FitBot tracks your muscle recovery

so you can avoid burnout, keeping your momentum rolling. Fine-tuned by experienced certified personal trainers. All right, you're getting professionals helping you out, customizing your workout. Level up your workouts with customized fitness plans that work for you, Eric, and over a thousand demonstration videos Get in shape this summer with fit bod join fit bod today

Get your personalized workout plan get 25% off your subscription or try it the app for free for seven days at fit bod dot Me slash golden hour. That's fitbod.me slash golden hour fit bod VBOD.ME slash Golden Hour FitBod. Yeah, man, I don't know. I just, to get back to it, I still think, I think it's gonna be the thing. Fuck, fuck, man.

My late 20, bro, my, oh my God, bro. I would go and, one time I went, I saw another comic there. This was, I had been going, obviously, because I already, I guess I was probably in my 30s at this point, but I saw another comic there. This was, I had been going obviously, cuz I already, I guess I was probably in my thirties at this point, but I saw him there and we're like, hey, what's up? And he's like, hey. We started going together. Isn't that funny?

I remember you used to always say like, you know. That I would go? Yeah. Yeah. I haven't been in years, dude. I used to love going, bro. Should you go in like the morning? Yeah I would go in whenever.

Yeah anytime, anytime, anytime. You don't eat food at a strip club though right? I tried once. It's too confusing. You got a lot going on man. Yeah it's better if it's not good food. You don't want to play baseball and football together. Two things you love. I just like this video this kid he seems like he's Satan Okay, 80s kids so eight grand from dealers eight thousand dollars in cash

They then believe that he got on the phone called his 12 year old friend and told him about the money and the spending spree Got underway. What were you doing? We could go today? Oh about the money and the spending spree got underway. What were you doing a week ago today? Oh. A week ago today. Oh. Oh. We went into a limousine and they took us,

you know, if pure 39 is, took us down there. You know all those games are. We spent about $200 with the games. Oh, this kid is just. We bought some clothes. This is you. I got these leather jackets right here, San Francisco. That's my friend.

I don't know what it's, Leather Shop. It says it on the back, but that don't matter. No, that's the guy you met at the strip club. They do your summer's adventure in San Francisco. That's my friend. I don't know what it's, Leather Shop. It says it on the back, but that don't matter. No, that's the guy you met at the strip club. You knew something of his adventure in three ways. It was fun, he doesn't feel guilty about taking and spending drug money, and he wouldn't ever. This is Robin Hood, he's Robin Hood. He's the real Robin Hood.

That was dangerous. We could've got killed if people killed for that money. Ray's life has changed, he's broke again. Police are keeping the thousands of dollars they didn't spend, at least for now. Ray will also be looking for new friends. His parents will be sending him to a new school. In Petaluma, Mark Jones, News Center 4.

This kid's a hero. Yeah. This kid's a hero in a leather jacket, you understand? He's the, he's, he's, what the fuck, bro? Look at the way this kid's up against his pizza world. I do, with a newspaper article about him. Yep. Do you know what he is?

Do you know what he is? Different, bro. And there's so many regular motherfuckers out there, bro. This kid props, bro, props. This is the thing that I love about that kid is that he's just, ignorance is bliss. Yeah, what is he fucking, how old is he? I know but he has no idea.

You're gonna feel guilty. Yeah, but in the moment he thought, hey yeah, I guess we could have been killed by this. But in the time he was just kinda like, let's get a limo, you know what I mean? Like in real life, I. Yeah, it's the movie Big. Yeah, it's just, it's crazy.

No, but it's like, I think that there's something special about when people don't know. Oh, absolutely. Yeah, absolutely. John Cassavetes, my favorite, probably my favorite filmmaker ever, said that he would often, almost, like, I don't want to say exclusively,

but very often cast non-actors in movies. Because nobody was doing this back then, but people kind of do that now. Like Stephen Soderbergh would be like, let's get a real construction worker to do it or whatever. But he would say that the reason why he would do that is because the first time somebody's doing something, you get a certain thing about it where it just, you can't recreate it.

And he thought it was, you know. Which is the whole point. But see, the thing I push back on that though, is that that why you know you hire a talented actor. Yeah yeah yeah I understand I understand that that's and you know I'm not saying what he did was right or whatever it was just a version of something no right or wrong but yeah. Yeah it's no right or wrong but I just think I just go I get that energy I mean it's just like you know you often think of jokes that you the first time you did them. Yeah I know. You know what I mean? You're like, oh man.

And I think though the thing that makes stand up comedy, what it is, is repeating that in the same way. Like that's the hard part. Right. You know what I mean? That's the, you know, you. That's a good point. You know, eventually you're like, I'm sick of this joke.

How do I give it the same energy or whatever it is? That's your skill. That's what you get paid for. Yeah. You know? So it's. Yeah. And it's funny too, that's why everyone get paid for. Yeah. You know? Yeah. So it's uh. Yeah.

And it's funny too. That's why everyone always thinks they can do stand up comedy because it looks easy when that's the hard part. Yeah. Making it look easy. Yeah. I always say the best compliment you could give a comic is not, hey, you were funny. Is that the first time you ever said that?

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well no, that is a compliment and then when somebody asks that I think, you're a fucking idiot. Because that's crazy to not know that. It's like a webcam guy. I mean. No, but no, no, man, dude. It's like, no. No, I understand.

You don't know the culture of standup and all that shit. But it's just. No, no, but again, or a person just, even if they do know, even if they had, maybe they haven't seen you. Yeah, sure. And they're like, wow, that, oh man. They got the energy that you were saying that for the first time.

Like that's the skill. Yeah. That's the gift. Yeah, it's a huge part of it. You know what I mean? It's a huge part of it. By the way, I literally was on, I woke up this morning, the first thing I saw was, I don't often do this, but I got my phone and I looked at Instagram right when I saw was, I don't often do this, but I got my phone

and I looked at Instagram right when I woke up, and I don't often do that, I try not to do that. And there was a poem came up that a guy wrote. And I don't even know what I'm looking at, I'm just reading it, I don't know who posted it, and it's a swipe thing and I'm reading pages of the poem. And the reason why I'm reading it is because it's good, it's a swipe thing and I'm reading pages of the poem okay and the reason why I'm reading is because the it's it's good it's a good poem right yeah and I'm like this is fucking funny and interesting and shit that I'm

like who the fuck is this person I follow this person and then I look and it's a guy that has posted collab with somebody. So that's why I don't recognize. So then I'm like, I look at the guy who posted it and I'm like, who the fuck is this guy? And I'm like, oh yeah, dude. Oh yeah, I met this guy at a fucking Starbucks once. Okay.

And I just talked to him for a while and we were talking and we had like a 15 minute chat, you know I was in Hollywood, you know how you're in Hollywood and you'll just end up talking to some guy for 15 minutes. Yeah because you're just waiting for this. Latté for Chris. I know. And it's not even because.

Good talk buddy. And it's not even because you're famous, it's just because everyone in LA is crazy. Right? And you're just waiting around for something, okay? And so, so I go, oh, this is this guy. And he's like 60 something. And I followed him and when I followed him, I thought, I'm going to fucking unfollow this guy in an hour, right?

But I didn't because he was like, yeah, follow me. So anyway, I'm like, he wrote this poem. I'm like, this poem is fucking good. Okay. I liked it, bro. I'm the first guy to be like, fuck'm like, he wrote this poem. I'm like, this poem is fucking good. I liked it. Bro, I'm the first guy to be like, fuck these poems. But this one, I liked it. And I look at this guy's page, so now I'm interested in this guy.

And I go back on his page. I talked to this guy about, he's Australian. I talked to this guy about touring Australia. I talked to him about how I'm a comedian. He didn't know who I was, which I you know, I I I told him, you know where I've been all over the world traveling all around the world He understood I was a successful comedian. I followed him He saw while I followed him. Oh, wow, you have two million plus followers. Yeah. Okay, so he knows That you know

I'm him All right. Okay. Okay. So now I'm looking at the guy I scroll down I go oh he's actually talented really nice poem the guy does stand-up comedy he didn't start doing it recently it's been in the I go I'm fucking telling this guy all about my life he doesn't know who I am okay but he doesn't mention I do stand up to I'm talking about multiple clips in the past I go everyone's so fucking crazy bro yeah that is crazy that is insane that is great letting yeah yeah that is crazy and he's on a podcast right now being like I didn't even ask this guy's just letting you talk. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that is crazy. And I don't even want to.

And he's on a podcast right now being like, I didn't even ask this guy to tell me about his life and he's telling me about his. Look up this guy Chris something. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Insane, bro. Yeah, everybody's got a little crazy.

Insane, this guy just kept that from me. He betrayed me. He betrayed me in Starbucks for 15 minutes, dude. And I opened up. Did you? I kind of did. Did he ask you to open up? Oh, bro.

Yeah. Yeah, he was asking me. He said, what do you do? Yeah. And then you thought you had to give him your whole resume? No, but like. Who's really crazy in this situation? This guy or you? I am crazy, but in that situation my craziness didn't affect anyone. His fucked

me in the ass. Only because later you found out that he once tried stand-up comedy. Maybe he was embarrassed to say, you know what I... Okay. You know what I mean? Okay. Like he didn't want to be like, you're actually, you're like, wow, this guy tours. I mean, I just did a few open mics. I don't want to, you know, I don't want to, cause maybe you don't want to do that.

But you go, Hey, you know, I'm a comic too. He didn't want to do that. Okay. Yeah. See who's crazy. No, I'm not crazy for that. Hit the Steve Harvey picture. I just got, I really, I really was thinking about that this morning so much.

And then I woke up and I took a shower and I didn't sleep well last night and I, you know. Yeah, because you were up at 2 a.m. confirming that you were okay with 10.30. I was. I was up at, I was trying to watch the end of the squid game thing. I can't get to it, but Kevin sent this what the fuck is this? This is the future you can be I've seen that yeah, but whose dick looks like that I mean, that's crazy. Well, no, but you don't you're not you know, no, no, no, this is for men. I know

What do you mean you hook your phone up and you fucking it sucks your dick? No, but look at the what they're saying is the dick is like this Bro, that's that's the placeholder for the dick. Okay, but this fucking guy. Hey, if you're gonna have a placeholder Make it at least dick. Yeah. Okay. All right fair fair so you can see how it's gonna be Nobody's dick is like that. This is gonna hurt. I bet that feels crazy You got one that spins imagine you take that on the road with you. It's got multiple speeds too. You know what?

I'll tell you this. $247? I'll tell you this. I have an issue with that. Not me. But if you, I'll tell you what. That thing, that thing, that thing, I guarantee it doesn't go slow enough for me. I guarantee.

Chris needed to be like this. Slower. Hey, slower. Bro, I basically soak. You know what's, let me tell you what's wrong with this machine. Uh huh. Okay. I guarantee it doesn't go slow. I gotta manually do it. Alright, I'll do it slowly. Turn it off.

It's like you got it on one, you're like, I'm still doing it. This is what's wrong with this machine. Maybe it feels great. Maybe you're like, wow, the problem is when you're in the bathroom cleaning it after. You've said this before about the pocket pussy thing. Oh, well that's the thing about this is like, if it's not self cleaning, I'm out. Bro, hey. You know what I mean?

I got a hot take here. You know what I mean, boy. I got a hot take. Give it to me. I don't have this. I don't think I'll ever buy something like this. You're not gonna clean it? If I did, I ain't cleaning it. Ha ha ha ha ha. I ain't think I'll ever buy something like this. You're not gonna clean it? If I did, I ain't cleaning it. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. It was just cummy.

It's just crusty. Who cares? No, I think you have to clean it. I ain't cleaning shit bro. I think it's messing with the rubber and the feeling. You just get a new one. Ha ha ha ha ha. Sweetie, I broke the thing.

Go on the past history for Amazon purchases and just get another one. Why do you have 17 of these? Try to see if there's any used ones. Oh, that's so funny. I used to have this joke. I used to try this joke on stage. It's funny, but I just never really cared about it that much.

Is nobody, I think I've said this actually on this podcast, but nobody, if you had, if sex robots, so sex robots are a real thing, okay? Nobody would buy a used one, and that's crazy, because if you're just sport fucking women, you're basically doing that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. And that's.

That's bananas. Bananas, bro. No, but people think that sex robots will be like Teslas. Nobody wants to use one. That's why CarMax is full of used Teslas. Really? Yeah, because it's kind of feel like that you want, I want this battery to be fresh.

You know what I mean? I don't know, used sex robot. First of all, the sex robots, they're not ready. Until they look like, yeah, dude. no, no. Until they look like... Yeah, yeah, dude. Fuck all that. Yeah, and you're talking about having to clean that? You gotta pick this fucking heavy...

No, no, no, you gotta... The bots gotta clean it. Take a shower! Just short-circuiting in the shower. I'll be in Tacoma, 13th and... Fuck, I need to do my dates in the weekend. 12th, 13th, 14th I think it is. Tacoma, Nate Jackson Comedy Club. Come check me out.

I got some other dates coming up, but that's the most recent. Huntsville, Alabama, Irvine, California, Indianapolis, Miami, Florida, Houston. I'll see you there at chrislea.com. Thanks. Peace. What's up guys?

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