The Golden Hour - Lifestyle Creep | The Golden Hour #139 w/Brendan Schaub, Erik Griffin & Chris D'Elia

Episode Date: July 4, 2025

The guys talk about Chin almost getting fired, Erik's weight loss journey, Elon Musk and Mark Zuckerberg changing their political views, all new P Diddy trial updates and much more! Get this episode AD FREE + 2 PATREON ONLY episodes/month only at https://patreon.com/thegoldenhourpodcastDrive Fast All Gas Giveaway - Enter to win my Custom 800+ Horsepower RAM TRX + $10K cash: https://drivefastallgas.com/collections/new-releasesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Agent Nate Russo returns in Oracle III, Murder at the Grandview, the latest installment of the gripping Audible original series. When a reunion at an abandoned island hotel turns deadly, Russo must untangle accident from murder. But beware, something sinister lurks in the Grandview shadows. Joshua Jackson delivers a bone-chilling performance in the supernatural thriller that will keep you on the edge of your seat. Don't let your fears take hold of you as you dive into this addictive series.

Love thrillers with a paranormal twist? The entire Oracle trilogy is available on Audible. Listen now on Audible. We're friends that laugh. We're friends that shout. Sometimes we don't know what we're talking about But that won't stop us Nothing can stop us Ooh, yeah It's like a show you used to love Just rebranded enough It's stronger, better, bigger power Cause it is the Golden Hour Hey, so are we starting or no?

Yeah. All right. Hey, but also, okay, we started. Okay. Chris, I'll be at chrislea.com. I will be in Indianapolis. I will be in Miami, Huntsville, Alabama, Irvine. Tacoma. I will be in Miami. I will be in Houston. Go I will be in Miami, Huntsville, Alabama, Irvine. Tacoma.

I will be in Miami, I will be in Houston. Go to chrisley.com, get those tickets for those hot summer dates. Oh and. I'm going to be at Nate Jackson's Comedy Club in Tacoma in a couple weeks. So come check me out there. But check it out dude. Oh yeah yeah yeah. Let me have my coffee.

Is that mine? Yeah. But check it out dude. The new Life Rips Camo. Dude the hoodie just in time for summer. No, but, but, but I got the sleeves off. I got, no, I know. Oh yeah. Well, don't do that. No, I won't. But I have a hat too that I didn't wear that's camo. So when I really want to go incognito, but still no life rips, we got it going on here. All right. ChrisLia.com. You do just in time for a hot summer. I dig it, dude. And camo.

Can't go wrong with camo buddy. No, Hey, you, you, uh, probably see a lot of camo out there, right? Not even fashionably, just because it's, you know, you're in Texas. People are hot. Well, they were a camo out here. Just it's a, it's a, it's a Texan tuxedo. Right. No one says shit. Like out here. It's, it's, it's fashion, but in Texas, it's not fashion. It's what I'm saying. You wear a camo. No one says shit. Like out here, it's fashion. But in Texas, it's not fashion. It's a way of life. It's a way of life.

Brendan, how was the tryouts? How was... How were they? Tiger made the team, dude. How were they? How were they? Oh, sorry. How did tryouts be?

There we go. I'm into that. Dude, Tiger made the fucking team, number two team in the nation. But here's the thing. I shot a show on Thursday, right? And Tiger tried out on Wednesday, it was a three day tryout and they're like, we'll let some people know right away

and then others will let know the following week. So I didn't know. So Tiger tried on Wednesday, balled out. And then Thursday, I'm shooting a show, right? An hour long MMA breakdown show. An hour. I know how this is going. So Tiger tried on Wednesday, balled out. And then Thursday, I'm shooting a show, right? An hour long MMA breakdown show. An hour. I know how this is going to be.

Chin, the cord came out and just, we lost all the footage. All the footage after an hour of fucking dropping hot fucking takes, dude. I come in here, work my ass off, dude. Boo! Chin goes, ah man, we have to do it again. I come in here, work my ass off, dude. Boo! Ching goes, ah man, we have to do it again. I went, what? Did Chin pass himself?

Oh my God. In my head I'm like, oh I'm gonna fire Chin in Texas even though he just moved here, we'll figure it out. Well, he would learn a lesson, wouldn't he? But then I get a text. Then I get a text, congratulations, Tiger made the team. I went, Chin, it's your lucky day buddy. Oh wow.

Nothing, nothing can mess this up. I was going to fire you, but you're rehired. Oh, wow. So, well, okay. So, well, that's good. So your mood, okay. Well, you got that text at a good time, but also, um, wow, that's, uh, did chin feel bad?

Did he mope? I want, I want to know. He didn't give a shit. He goes, dude, no chin goes, dude, my track record. Come on one time in 10 years. I go, it's a big time though, dude. Yeah. And when did he say my track record?

Right away or did he wait a little bit? You gotta know. Well, I simmered for about five minutes in anger. And then I was like, chin, you serious right now, dude? Oh. He goes, I know, I'm sorry, man. I go, fuck, dude. Okay.

Are you kidding me? He goes, dude, my track record. Oh, see, that's too soon to say that. I'm I'm sorry, man. I go, fuck, dude. Are you kidding me? He goes, dude, my track record. Oh, see, that's too soon to say that. I'm pissed off now, Jen. That is too soon to say that. Jen, give it an hour and a half, and then be like, yo, I really am sorry. I hope my track record speaks for itself.

That would have been the- No, I disagree. What? I disagree. He's been around too long, you know, and he's like, yo, chill, right? He's like, come on, man. But that's what I'm saying. With my track record, you're, and he's like, yo, chill, right? He's like, come on, man. But that's what I'm saying.

With my track record, you're going to treat me like this? Yeah. So you think it's OK for him to do that? Yeah. All right. I think Eric's spot on, and also, too, knows me well. I fly off the handles, and then I say, I'm like a Sour Patch Kid.

Dad, that's why you're on the handle. I'm like a Sour Patch Kid. Wait, wait, wait, wait. I'm like, I'm sorry, baby. Here's the real thing. You must have been really, you must have really thought you were on fire. What was the take that you were like, I'm never, baby. Here's the real thing. You must have been really, you must have really thought you were on fire. What was the take that you were like,

I'm never gonna, that was the take. What was the take? Bro, you get it. Honestly, Eric, honestly, honestly, all 60 minutes. It was a hot episode. It was, for whatever reason, all 60 was fucking fire. You know what? The fucking liver king.

You know what the worst part? John Jones. But do you know what the worst part is? It has nothing to do with how good that episode is. It has to do with, this is the real issue. Here we go. Doing it again, it's not even gonna be. Oh yeah.

Doing it again is the thing. No, no, and then while you're doing it. The passion's gone. No, no, but the passion's gone. God. But while you're doing it again, you in your head, in your head you're going like this. God, this isn't this good. Gone, it's gone. But while you're doing it again, you in your head, in your head you're going like this. God, this isn't this good.

Gone, it's gone. You just know it's not as good. I was missing points, I was missing points I made earlier. I'm not that into it, I've already done it. I was like, fuck it, fuck it. And in the middle of it, you just kept, you set a take that you didn't say the same, you just look over a chin.

Yeah, and you go, I don't even believe this take anymore I believed it two hours ago when I was filming it But yeah, so the fans were expecting hot lava and they got lukewarm, but it's okay though They'll understand and they probably won't know the difference Because sometimes I do the I'm like after congratulations I'm like that's the worst podcast I ever did and it's sometimes my wife is like in the room and she's watching and she's Like dude that no that is not so maybe it was good. Maybe it's bad. You never know you never know, dude Yeah, you can't we can't listen your wife though. You know I'm saying like that's right What do you call it? Well, he's in Texas they don't

Women can't even vote in Texas What are you doing out of the kitchen? Am I right? Okay guys, I have an announcement. It's a podcast, not a warm apple pie. Yeah. There we go. Yeah. I have to think about that.

Can I tell you guys something? Women don't know how to make podcasts. They know how to make warm apple pies. Oh, I get it now. I'm just not that sexist, you know? Well. I'm pretty sexist. I have been sexist in my life.

Go ahead. All right, so I have, okay, so this is what happened. So I don't know, I mean, I don't know if anybody's noticed, but I have put on a little bit of weight. You know what I mean? I'm trying to, you know. You don't say. Okay, go ahead, Brandon, go ahead, go ahead!

You know what? You know what? Hey, Chris, hmm! Hmm! I feel it like as if you were here. But even, I gotta be honest, I haven't looked at Eric since 2015. Here we go, anyway.

I have no idea. Anyways, so I said to myself, all right, I gotta do something about this, but I said, so I got on the scale, and I was like, you ever like, The scale goes, come on. No, no, but no, but you ever like, Scale said to be continued.

You know it's been. Yeah, the scale goes, who's this? It can't be. All right, go ahead. Brendan, anything else from you? And you say, it's Eric, and he, who's this? It can't be. All right, go ahead. Brendan, anything else from you? And you say, it's Eric, and he says, and who? No, it says one at a time, please.

One at a time. Anybody else? Kevin? We gotta do it. Nick, you got something? Eric, what are you holding? Okay. Please, please use a freight weight thing.

Please use a truck weight thing. Oh, no, Nick. No, Nick, you're holding. Okay. Please, please, please use a freight weight thing. Please use a truck weight thing. Oh, no, Nick. Nick, you sh- FIRED! Between that and a warm apple pie one, I don't know, man. So anyways, I know I'm like, you know what, this is gonna be a thing. So I go, so I tell my, in my head I go, let me add 15 pounds to the weight that I think I am. Okay, because you think, just so you don't to the weight that I think I am. You know? Because you think, just so you don't go. Yeah. Got it. And it was 15 pounds over that 15 pounds.

No, no. Yeah. Yeah. That's when I was like, oh, okay. So yesterday, yesterday I did the thing where I like, I didn't eat after eight and then I didn't, the night before I didn't eat after eight and then the next day I woke up and I didn't eat after eight and then I didn't, the night before I didn't eat after eight and then the next day I woke up and I didn't eat till 12

and then I didn't eat after eight. So I'm good. Like I haven't eaten today. And the thing about it was, I was thinking about it, it's about discipline. I was like, you know what? I'm an undisciplined motherfucker. You know what I mean?

I realized about that. Well yeah, you're super disciplined. That's the thing, you're super disciplined. You disciplined you were the most disciplined guys I know you just love fucking banana pie yeah but the thing is yeah whatever whatever pick your poison poison but Eric I would assume have you put on weight because you're you're on the road a lot more no it was food there that's all you know bodied up you guys have all these tasty treats. There was a lot of things.

It was like, it was, cause I had a trainer in Culver City and I was going good. And then I realized I don't have the discipline to do that on my own. So then when I moved and then I'm trying to find a place and what you got, but I'm looking for an old man Jiu Jitsu place so I have a couple of places I'ma go to

and then like, you know, but I'm starting with the diet that's the most important thing yeah so like I said like I'm not I haven't eaten this morning cuz I'm not gonna eat till 12 and it's only 1121 so when I finish here I'm gonna get some I gotta tell you I can't wait to see what Photoshop they're coming up because their faces needs to go fast Nick and Kevin are just yeah of of course dude, but uh, uh, yo Yeah, it's about yeah, it's just I mean have your calorie intake be less than and and go for walks like yeah Yeah, yeah, i'm doing it with the kid, you know, yeah, eric eric. Does your wife say anything when you get a little thick? No, no, she tries to be nice, you know, but i've always been thick. Nah fat shaming. You gotta fat shame people dude

It works. Yeah, I know work. Look at Lizzo. It works. Oh, I heard she ate. Not the food, not food. I'm saying I heard she ate with the new mix tape. Did she? I didn't hear it. I heard she fucking ate. She ate? And I heard 10 seconds of it and I go. Like Will Smith?

It could be eaten. She's like, ah. No, I go, it could be eaten. Ah, ah. Oh, there it is. Unreal. like, ah. No, I go, it could be, I go, I go, it could be eaten. Ah, ah. Oh, there it is. Unreal. Oh, wow. You know what?

That's what. You're like the nutty professor. Yeah. This is not funny. This is not funny at all. That looks crazy real. Oh, here we go. No, no, no, no.

Here we go. You know what's funny? No, no, no, Chris, go. You know what's very funny? You know what they call fat people in Texas, the kids? I didn't know this until I was around the neighbor kid. There was like a big lady and he goes, oh look, there's a fat back.

And I thought it was like, they were talking about like brisket, you know, or like some sort of kind of meat. He's like, nah, fat back. That's not a fat Mexican. Yeah, that's what I thought, racist, yeah. No, it was a fat white lady. He just goes, yeah, he just goes, yeah, we call him fat back. That's not a fat Mexican? Yeah, that's what I thought. Racist, yeah. Nah, it was a fat white lady. Oh, it was.

He just goes, yeah, yeah, he just goes, yeah, we call him fat backs. Oh, Jesus. Come on down to fat backs. I'd open that restaurant. Yeah. All right, get this off the screen, Nick. The hilarious thing about this is,

the hilarious Photoshop that Nick did was, Eric was 150 pounds heavier and still had dope jeans on I love that that you were still fashionable those are the jeans that I actually you know those jeans those are Nate Jackson has a big guy oh you know well that was that was AI but okay yeah I know but no but that was from a picture he got that from a picture so So those are the jeans I had on in the picture. See? Those jeans are like vintage torn and shit. Yeah, go fuck yourself. Look at me cool on stage.

With a farty shirt on and... That's cool. Hey Eric, you don't have anyone in your life when you get a little thick goes, hey bud, let's chill out. Maybe don't do the full wrap. Yeah, yeah, I do. He's a ex- ex USC fighter and another one has a big ass

forehead with a bird nose. Who's that? I don't say, I've never said that. And then there's like, you know. I never do that. Like a lethal weapon of video audio crew. Lethal weapon. Where's that Photoshop, huh?

Kevin's just Photoshop, huh? Kevin's just like, I'm getting too old for this shit. Kevin's just like, put it in your mouth. Put the pistol in your mouth. All right, new subject change. I wanted to ask you all about this. Did you see that Tesla is now delivering the cars with like, they did, the autonomous drive

The car comes to your place. Oh, that's how do you buy it? But you know what I was thinking about then if you don't make the payments does your car drive away? That's so funny. I mean that would be annoying. No, that is what they need to do. You think so miss the payments It just the garage Quiet Just the garage open. Ah. Just quiet, quiet. Yeah, just sneaked away. My kid's stuff is in there. The fact that it.

Just like drove itself from the Giga factory. The fact that it is silent, that is a good reason why it's silent, is so it can leave if you don't make a payment. Dude, that's hilarious. But I don't know what happens at any time though. You come out of the market and you think your car's stolen.

But dude, but this is why you can't have electric cars, dude. They could just shut them down. The government can take your shit whenever you want. Dude, they can shut down any car that has electronics in it. Your car has a bunch of electronics in it. Your car's not all vintage. Yeah, but they can't shut it down remotely.

Yes, they could. No, they can track, they can track Chris's. They can't shut it down. They can track it. They can't shut it down. They can track it. They can't shut it down. Hey, hey, hey, try to catch me. Try to catch me, dude. My shit goes so fast.

I'll crash, though. I'll crash before you get me. You would hope it delivers to the right place. I'll lose the back of that thing. I'll lose the back of that thing. This is like a whole separate type of towing. But you know what? This is computers taking jobs.

This is AI taking jobs even away from like the bondsmen and people. Bro. The repo man don't have a job no more. But repo man gonna be first to go. I'm telling you right now. I'm telling you right now. Why did you say that so clearly? I'm surprised there are still repo men. Yeah, Ms. Anne.

God, how gay are those guys clapping? It's just a car. You just got your car. Tesla is so weird, okay? Because he's like this, you know, right wing dude, Elon, You just got your car. Tesla is so weird, okay? Because he's like this, you know, right wing dude, Elon, that made cars to be better for the environment, even though they're not, right?

I understand. But I don't, because I don't want to hear Brendan after I say that. So, but he did that with left pressure, with pressure from the left. And then he became this right wing guy. And now these people from the left have Teslas with fucking bumper stickers that are like, nah, but fuck Elon.

It's so, the whole thing is so weird. I love it. First of all, I reject your premise. I think that he made this company to do exactly what he did, become the richest man in the world. Oh, no, no, no, no. That's the real thing. No, no, no.

He didn't do it for the left. Yeah, okay. I understand that, I understand that. He's gonna do it, he's gonna self-serve. You get it. That motherfucker's ice cream. Oh, but Trump came, Trump came at him hard on Truth Social

about like all his subsidies and all, you know. Of course he did subsidies and all this. He's like, we're not doing electric car mandates. I'm gonna send you home. Yeah. Yeah, but Chris, to Eric's point, like Elon, whether he's left, if the left was in the White House,

he'd be doing the same shit. I don't think he's left or right. He's a businessman trying to make the most money. So he has contracts with Trump. Oh yeah, oh absolutely. So all the White House cars are Teslas. Absolutely, no, no, no. They're met in huge contracts.

You're saying. Starlink, all that shit. Yeah, you're saying that if the Democrats were in power. He'd be sucking them off. Oh, bro, there's no question. There's no question. Hey, if you become the richest man in the world by sucking somebody off, I mean.

Sign me up. I mean, look at, look at, look at Zuckerberg, dude. I mean, the dude flip-flopped immediately as soon as Trump turned into an old man. Yeah, and got on TRT, started doing Jiu-Jitsu. You know what? I don't know if he flip-flopped so much as he like... Well, he did vocally. No, no, no. What I'm saying is, I think that, I personally think that when you're wealthy like that, you're more conservative anyway, but like, you know, the pressure from like the media and stuff, so you're quiet.

I think he just like opened his mouth for the first time and always felt like that. Yeah, but no, but Facebook was very liberal. Super liberal. It was. Yeah, I mean, you didn't take it down for- And there are cahoots with the Biden stuff and suppressing information.

And people go, man, it's such a big company. And I'm like, all right, but you were giving him all this credit before all this shit happened. And then now it's like, how can he monitor all of it? I'm like, that's such a fucking cop out. I think he's a cuck. He's a bad dude. This summer, Pluto TV is exploding

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and stream for free from all your favorite devices. Pluto TV, stream now, pay never. Shop with Rakuten and you'll get it. What's it? It's the best deal. Pluto TV. Stream now. Pay never. cashback just start your shopping with Rakuten to save money at over 750 stores join for free at Rakuten dot CA or download the Rakuten app. That's r a k U t e n Rakuten dot CA well anyway have some magic mine ha you know what uh, here's another thing I don't have any here. I don't know if this was AI Nick But like I thought the most gangster thing I've ever seen because of the person's position is when Trump called,

he said Iran and Israel, he said to the press that they are fucking stupid. That was real. That was real. They don't know what the fuck they're doing. They don't know what the fuck they're doing. I was like, I was like, oh man. Gangster. How do you not, how do you, oh man, did gangster.

How do you not, how do you not be like, well look, well because here you go. I was like, oh man, that's like, you know what? Cause it's like, that's when you know, like that's some raw emotion. Yeah. I mean, if they're trying to not be at war, they don't know what they're doing.

No, no, but this is what, but I'm, what I'm saying though is like that's some, that's some true raw emotion. Well, no president before him would have. No one ever, but I is what but I'm what I'm saying though is like that's I get it That's some true raw motion will know president before him would know whenever But but I bet you they felt like that, of course they did, you know But this guy was like he must have what I'm saying is he must have in that moment been so furious that he was like You know, they don't know what the fuck they're doing. No script nothing. Also Eric also Eric How long but it just to change subjects to over here all the way in Texas, dude How long have you and I been saying that did he's gonna get off? Oh

No, no, here's the thing here's not yet I think that he's gonna say he got off ha ha ha I do work that was a title my last pocket. I said it did it did he get off? Oh you did Yeah, but here's the thing. Here's the thing. I think he's gonna do like three or four years Time served and I think he'll get out in a year and a half and maybe even get house arrest or something They're not going to get him on the rackets. What for what eric? Oh because because he he clearly is drugs He clearly is guilty of the transportation for prostitution. He is guilty of that. Nope. Nope. Nope Nope, because those because they got them on record with those hoes agreeing to it and a payment They got paid like $10,000.

Right. And it was against the will. That's evidence. That's evidence. Yeah, you can't do that. You can't do that. I don't think he's going to prison for that. I think so.

I think he will. But it's still a failure on the prostitution's part because they just, I don't think they cannot prove racketeering. Because this is what racketeering would be too, like Brendan's, so thick boy entertainment. So, you know, if he, if Brendan has somebody like buy an airline ticket, all of a sudden now that's the conspiracy of the, but you're like,

but I'm saying this, if you're rich like that, you have your assistant do stuff. Bro, come on. It doesn't, it's not rack, I think they went for the wrong thing. It'd be like if my wife was like, he paid for my flight, get him. Yeah.

No, but not even your wife paid for your flight. It would be like if, that would be getting on you, but it'd be like if your assistant paid for your wife's flight and she didn't like what happened. Oh, oh, oh. You know what I mean?

And then they're like, well, Chris is a, this is an organization. Right, right, right. Also the jury, it's 10 dudes and two women. Oh, is it? And they're also different age ranges too. I think the older people are gonna be like, I don't know, this don't, this sound fishy.

There's an eight year old in the jury. He goes, what's wrong with peeing? What's wrong with baby oil? What's wrong with baby oil and peeing? I don't get it. I think it's pretty. I did potty three times here so far. I think it's crazy.

I think the whole thing is, the whole thing is. Look at that. There it is. That's amazing. Kevin. That's fantastic. Nick loves how he looks right there. I know you love that.

I tell you what. I think Nick looks better how he is. I really do. Damn, Kevin's going as well. Kevin's going as well. Bro, let me tell you something right now. Yeah. Let me tell you something right now.

That guy right there, that is not a guy, right? That's Danny Glover with Kevin's face on it. Yeah. But that guy eats so much pussy, it's unbelievable. Right there, that guy, that doesn't exist. Kevin needs to learn, that guy. That doesn't exist. That guy. Kevin needs to learn from this guy. Like, he can't, like he, there were multiple times

where women, he's eaten their pussy before he's even kissed them. That guy. That guy. Look at that guy. He goes for the pussy first. I would like to try something. He says.

Wow. Hey, hey, he says, he says, now I have never done this before, and he has, but I would like to try to eat your pussy before I ever kiss you and He's done it multiple times So that's the regular This is the villain in that lethal weapon movie That's the villain that's the villain in spawn

That lethal weapon movie. Yeah, that's the villain in Spawn. Oh yeah, what was it? Dude, Chris, I saw, I wanted to call you last night. I was so. I was ready. I saw a movie last night that Rachel put on, right? But I just watched, it was called Lazy Susan. Okay, so.

It's Sean Hayes. Oh, who's great, he's great, but he's playing a woman. Bye. I'm out. I'm out. No, but listen I'm watching the whole movie an actual woman. Yes. He's not a trans woman. No, bye That's what I thought too. I was like, oh is this this must be a trans thing No, but he's just literally playing a woman by I would only like that movie if An absolute over-the- top straight man did it. Because you know he's gay. Yeah. I would only like it if like Kiefer Sutherland did it.

How's it not getting backlash? Man, go! You can hire a woman. The man's taking a woman's job now. I love you. No, it's actually... Let's go to the park. Here's the thing.

If this movie was, what's her name, Melissa McCarthy, this movie would be hilarious. Probably not. No, I'm telling you. Well, I like that one actress though. No, there's some really funny people and there's like some funny moments in this movie, but I couldn't get past where I was like.

Oh, that he's a man? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was like, it's Sean Hayes. Do they allude to the fact that it is a man? No, no, no, it's not a man. I'm trying to tell you, it's full on- Fuck you.

Just Sean Hayes playing a woman. Nah, you know what? I gotta tell you something. The fact that they're going that far out is unreal and I will have to see it. You have to what? That's what I'm trying to tell you. Here's what I don't like more than that, okay?

And it's more subtle, okay? Is that Kiefer Sutherland? Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it is. Jesus Christ. You know what would be funny, we should start doing a timer. Don't assume my gender. How fast Nick can do it.

Yeah. That might have been a world record right there. All right, So listen. We should watch this on the Patreon. This is worse. Yeah, we should. This is worse because I just saw this. The Running Man trailer came out today with that boring guy.

What's his name? I heard he's the nicest guy, but of course he is. The Running Man? Again? Yeah, but no, Edgar Wright's great. And Glenn Powell's great, but Glenn Powell's in it. Glenn Powell's, he's melbitos You know what? I mean? He's our Arnold's running man. Yeah, but now it's gonna power

They we made this is the third one whatever it is like a funny cute guy now, right? I I he's definitely good-looking Yeah, I mean that guy. Yeah, but no, this is an action movie. So so it's not fun He's not good-looking. No, he is a good-looking dude. Maybe not there, but he's a good-'s not funny. He's not good looking? No, he is a good looking dude. He's a good looking dude. Maybe not there, but he's a good looking dude. Not there. He's charming and shit. Yeah, yeah, that's his thing.

He's charming. So anyway. This is like in Chris's lane. This is like Chris. So this guy. Chris likes basic looking girls and guys. Got it. Got it.

I said he's Melbitos. The guy's regular, but he's handsome enough to be a movie.. It's like, you know, Tom Cruise. He's good looking enough. He's, you know, nobody's going to be like, ew, this is what a movie star is. That's what a movie star is. Not looking at my go. That's a guy. He's symmetrical as fuck. He's symmetrical, you know, anyway. His eyes are too close together.

All right, bro. Look, Nick can Photoshop him wider. Look, here's the thing. Nick, go! No, no, no, no. So. Oh, I'm doing it. So the. Make him look like a sloth.

He has a baby in this movie. And then it shows the wife, and she's black. OK? And now listen. Ha ha, that's rude. No, now listen. It's, it's. I realized something in the shower

after I saw this trailer. I'm watching this, I was like, why does that shit piss me off so much with the fucking Running Man trailer? She's black, it's so fucking stupid. And I'm like, but why, man? White people and black people are fucking together. That happens in real life.

And then I go like this, but it doesn't piss me off in real life. And I go, people are fucking together. That happens in real life. Yeah. And then I go like this, but it doesn't piss me off in real life. And I go, that's fucking interesting. I go, that's really fucking interesting. There it is. And I go, but this is why. You'd suck yourself off if you could do that.

This is why, this is why. So, and I go, but this is why it pisses me off because you know that it in real life, you fall in love with who you fall in love with. You're, you're, you're a white person. You're falling over the Mexican. You're Mexican. You fall in love with a black person. You're, you know, whatever a white, a white woman, you fall in love with the Asian man.

Just joking. But you know what I mean? That stuff happens. That's the last one. But but the point is the point is, you know, when Hollywood does it, they're doing it and it's a service. They they are doing it because they feel like it's a virtue. It's virtue signaling. You know what I'm saying? So it doesn't.

When I see a white person, a black person together, I don't even, I didn't register that, right? I'm not like, Ooh, mixed race couple. But when I see it in Running Man, I'm like, look what Hollywood's trying to fucking do, dude. Yeah, well, but that's the fault of what they've been doing in the last five, six years because I understand.

Because before that, if it was nothing about it and you saw that, you wouldn't think that you'd be like, ah, whatever. Of course, yes. But it's just so apparent what they're trying to do. And that is way worse than being like, fuck it, let's just make Sean Hayes be an actual woman, not even a trans woman. Like that's, it's like, oh wow, that's bald. That'd be like if Tom Cruise played Anne Frank,

bro, take my money. I could tell you something. Hiding up in the closet. But let me tell you a story though. So I was on the set of I'm Dying Up Here. And we were all sitting, all the actors are sitting around. And you know. Well that's weird, actors never sit around and wait.

Melissa Leo, you know, she's that Oscar winner. She's great. So we're just having a discussion about what's his name? What's the dude from, oh he just died, Louis Anderson. He played what's his name's mom in, right? So we're sitting around like, oh he wanted Emmy, but here's this woman, Melissa Leo, in her 50s going, oh so another role taken away from women in their 50s,

as if there's a lot of work for them played by a man. So I mean, there's that. Yeah. No, no, no, I get it. I mean, look, a comedy is a comedy, so you can't really, comedies can do whatever they want, but yeah. I just don't get why they'd make another Running Man. Cause they did Arnold.

Oh, you know why. Eight years ago, they did one with Colin Farrell it ate Thinking a total recall, but that was an Arnold remake movie though total recall was Fucking stupid total recall is one of my favorite movies total recall. The remake is so bad Well, that's what the original fantastic. I know I'm agreeing but dude the way that we did it is so bad Hot car was great, but like dude come on They took all of the tone out of that movie that would the total dude to share a dude in the original Sharon Dude, the way they redid it is so bad. Colin Fowl's great, but like, dude, come on. They took all of the tone out of that movie.

The tone is what makes the movie so great. Dude, in the original, Sharon Stone, ooh wee! Am I right? Yeah, I don't know why they're remaking Running Man. That wasn't even, this is my thing about it. You know why they're remaking. No, no, no, what I'm saying is I don't know why. That wasn't a great movie.

I don't think that movie did. I don't know if it was that big of a hit. That was when Arnold was kinda going down, I think. No, I a great movie. I don't think that movie did I don't know if it was that big of a hit That's when Arnold was kind of going down. I think no, I love that movie. No, it was a big hit. Come on They need they look I wonder if they're gonna redo Commando they will oh, I think they probably wait for Arnold dies But they will they're not waiting now tall till he dies Predator on sports against a predator Yeah, he'll be the predator. Aren't supposed to get some predator. Yeah, his fun.

His show's kind of funny. Yeah, with the fucking Fubar. Oh, I didn't come on. Do it. Come on. Do it with dreads. It does a good. It's good.

It's all I have. It's the only accent I have. That's it. Yeah, but I just thought I was going to hit you out. It's a weird movie. And so yeah, I was watching. I was busy watching hit you out. It's a weird movie. And so. Yeah, I was watching. I was busy watching. We were on episode three or four of Squid Game, the final season. Oh, I'm out.

I fell way off on that show. Yeah. You know what? Look, it's the number one. Everyone else did, too. It's the number one show on Netflix. But now that's what they tell you. That's what they tell you. How do you know? How do you know? Because Asians, man. But listen, what I'm saying is nobody's talking about it. Same way why Yao Ming was the all-star vote getter. Yeah, but name one person.

Remember when Squid Game's first came out? Even my dumb ass was like, damn, this shit is lit. It was okay. Name one person talking about besides Chris right now. No, no, that's what I was saying. But I think that it's one of these things that they can't just let shit go. Like it's like, it was supposed to be a one-off.

We saw the story, it was great. Then when it makes all this hype, they go, we gotta do another one and it's never gonna, they can't. Well, of course, but that, you understand that they're just gonna try and milk it because they wanna make money. You get that, however, they're just,

what I don't like is these shows become successful and then they just try to make it bigger and more when it's like that usually makes it bad because they're focusing on what can we bring into this show to make it more fantastic and it's like dude you need to start with the story and they don't like dude there's a fucking and it's not bad it's like, dude, you need to start with the story. And they don't like, dude, there's a fucking, and it's not bad. It's not bad. The third one isn't bad, but like there's a baby in it.

And it's like, dude, you're jumping the shark. You know what I mean? But also Squid Games, it's not like you got done with it. It was like, oh, I can't wait. I wonder where season two is gonna go. We got it. We got it. I just exchanged people died.

It was a well formed story that was over. But here's my problem, and then when you go to, once you get a second season, now you start to delve into the nuance of the show and it actually don't make sense. Like it doesn't make sense. Yeah, no it doesn't. But what's cool is that-

First of all, it's not even enough money. What they're going through. No, I know, yeah. I mean it says billions- No, agree. Billion won. When you're going through. No, I know, yeah. I mean, it says billions. No, agree. Yeah, billion won. When you do, yeah. Yeah.

You look it up, when you go, when you go, what's the signal? $60,000. $60,000, then it goes $40,000, you go, oh, that's terrible. Yeah, it's like. The only thing that's cool is the guy who created the show off the first season,

cause it was like, you know, they didn't know how it was gonna do. Yeah, he didn't make any money. He made nothing. And then he did on the second season. He made nothing. So the second and third season, he's balling now. That's the only cool thing.

I'm happy about that. They're making an American version. Of Squid Game? I'm out. That's hilarious. Really? Yeah. Mr. Beast did it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. David Fincher is doing it. Wait, so it's a show or a movie? Oh, he doesn't miss. Oh, I'm back in. No, David Fincher's great, but hold on. He's never missed. But why, but the re but we already saw it.

Everyone in America saw it right now. It's on now. It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. Fincher looks at and goes, I'll do better. We want to see the new games. Interesting. It's the only thing I want to know. They're not going to, they're definitely going to have red light, green light. There's no way that there's no way they're getting rid of that.

That's too iconic. Yeah. That show too iconic. Yeah. That show is iconic. Hot scotch, you know. That show is iconic. What happened there? Just ironic. Ooh, that's a nice one, dude.

Yeah, that's the only one that should be. We need it. Well, you go Chris there, come get these. Oh yeah, I gotta get the hammer hoodie. And a hat. Just in time for summer. Dude. Just in time for summer dude Yeah

So you're in Texas. You've been there a month now, right? Do you feel like you're a Texan? Are you a Texan yet? What's the most times thing you do on a daily basis now? I've had barbecue damn it every day. I've been here Wow, really where in your in your house You cook it or you go places or hell. No, I don't cook it. What the fuck? No, I don't cook it. No, there's a ton of barbecue. Like there's a really good one five minutes away, so I picked some up for me and the boys.

If you guys were here, I would have hooked you up. Do you go over to Rogan's and get brown sugar or something like that? Like you go, hey. Yeah. Not on the door. Joe, do you have any? He's like 15 minutes away from me.

We're both on the lake. He's on a different lake. He's on like the rich lake. My lake's cool, but he's on the rich lake. And Brian's on a swamp. Dude, speaking of, who's this guy that is always- Brian lives in Waco with that accident. He's always fighting with Schultz

and then he's like always saying shit about Rogan, some liberal guy. Oh God, man, I wouldn't know that answer. It just came on my, oh my God, what's his name? He's like a skinny guy. You know what, I'ma find it and send you to the picnic. Sorry, but he's just some guy that's always, he's always going in with, him and Schultz

are always having some battle. Oh God. And then he was like, he, I don't know who that is Yeah, that's also post he goes he was talking about Rogan in the JFK files and he was like, hey Rogan He's saying some things that I wish I would see him say it in front of him. No that kind of shit Oh my god. No, that's the way the internet works and he'll get views off, you know talking bad about rogue Yeah, well that's a new thing now annoying. Yeah, but it's one of those one of those super liberal. Oh talking bad about rogue. Yeah, that's a new thing now.

Yeah, but it's one of those, one of those super liberal. Oh man, I saw this one liberal thing, this girl, fat girl. That guy? Yeah, that's him. Never heard of him. I actually haven't. I literally, I've never heard of that guy. You've never heard of Jack Schlossberg?

No. Yeah, this guy. What does he do? He's just an influencer. They posted that on your birthday. He looks like he has a big brain though, doesn't he? They posted that on your birthday. Isn't that your birthday? No, March 18th. Oh, that on your birthday. He looks like he has a big brain though, doesn't he? They posted that on your birthday. Isn't that your birthday? No, March 18th.

Oh, that is my birthday. Thank you, Christopher. Dude, that guy looks like Mega Mind. He has a big brain. So who is this guy though? What does he do? I don't know what he does. You don't know?

He's just a guy with a podium? That's great. You could literally just be a guy with a podium right now. That's what he is, man. Yeah, he's probably in his living room. He's got shorts on. But the thing is, I always, oh my god. Fuck, I make good points.

I just don't know if- And do funny jokes. If people, this guy's the epitome of, you know, typewriter, what is it? Typewriter warrior or keyboard warrior? Keyboard warrior, keyboard warrior, dumb fuck. Yeah, no, I'm just old. How am I a dumb fuck?

You remember typewriters, stupid bitch? Yeah, I do. There were stores, there were typewriters stores. Typewriter bandit, am I dumb fuck remember typewriters? There were stores there were typewriters bandit in my right. Oh, I did a typewriter in the only grandson of President John F Kenny. Oh wait, this changes things. Why I'm a focus related JFK. Let's hear him out here. Ah Well, you know, you know, I just end up getting shot soon, but that's over crashing a plane. Mine isn't too soon. His was. This dude might have something to say. Yeah, but he was going in, but he, but you should look on his Instagram.

I mean, look at him. Look at him on the bottom picture right there. Hey, what about me? Hey, what about me? It looks like, it looks like what's that Ben Schwartz? Oh yeah, he does, kind of a little bit. I mean, a little bit. Well, he's more a JFK style, handsome version.

Not that Ben is not, but. But also, this guy, if he has a problem, hey bud, take it up with your fucking uncle, RFK. He's the one who also co-signed those conspiracy. The fuck take it up with a take it with the family a little schmuck Yeah, but his but his Instagram post is like him saying this stuff and I just think to myself I don't I don't think you should do that. I don't like anyone I don't like you should talk shit about somebody that can probably Break ass the internet don't you in half? Yeah, but you're being so public about it, you know, it's like crazy

But he knows nothing's gonna happen to me. He's a fucking Kennedy, dude. Yeah, nothing bad ever happens to Kennedy's And another thing oh, yeah, no I get the assassination and the plane crashes now I get that I'm saying like it's not like I know someone's gonna seek him out. You can't get to him. He's like, oh, I see Queen of England. Yeah, you say that but then Chris, I wish it would have been that other one so you can see how stupid it is, bro. I You're acting like I I don't I don't I I know the ones that happen dude, and I know when I know the four of them. There's four. Okay So don't talk to me like, you know, just do them within your voice

Oh, yeah Yeah, but then I can Just do them within your voice. Oh yeah. Yeah, but then I can't be like Chris Lee.com afterwards. Here we go. Ah. I know. Get that one out the way. Ah yeah. Oh, cause I hate it cause you know it's dumb

and messes with the flow and you know it. Somebody does something and you want it to go, oops, not ding ding ding ding ding, it's stupid. No, I won't agree with that. Take that one off. Hey dude. little baby racks little baby racks the Airbnb owner showing everything he left behind after stay in Miami, he put that's a show, how much a 30 days stay in a show, how much a 30 days stay in a 10 day stay in a 10 day stay in a 10 day stay in a 10 day stay in a 10 day stay in a at least one if not even 10 pairs of shoes. So let's go through one by one. In this closet a brand new pair of 10 white air forces and more clothes and hats just thrown into the shelves. Over here loads of garbage and one pair of af1s in the walk-in closet and one more in the bedroom. And like every square foot of the house it was pretty gross especially the bathrooms. In the

living room a playstation controller and these ugly balenciaga slide-ins. In the next bedroom another controller, another two pairs of shoes, a clogged nasty bathroom and another two pairs of A of 1s in the closet. That's pretty weird. Next bedroom had some shorts, four expensive night pairs in the wardrobe and against so many accusations I'm not sneaking inside the house while they are away. They simply left the stuff and against so many accusations, I'm not sneaking inside the house while they're away. They simply left the stuff and don't care about it. In this case, I even called them and asked them what's up with all the clothing,

because one room had a whole suitcase full of merchandise and more shoes and if you pay attention, even some bullets on this desk. And now to the last bedroom, which is my favorite, because it has direct pool access, one pair of Air Forces on the floor, two three four five six seven eight eleven here and Another two in the bathroom last but not least the kitchen and fridge full of junk food And can you guess what was under this dude?

They say Alan Iverson used to be like but what I don't get is Harrison used to be like this. But what I don't get is... I bet you has a magnum condom if I take a bet on it. But what I don't get is, it's... Big dick. That's like... Okay, it's like when you open the door for somebody and they walk through, it feels like it's easier to say thanks than it is...

It feels like it's actually harder to not say something like you're actively being This is hard to do You know say like this is easier to do but they just leave all their shit there I understand that but getting everything in there is a whole operation Like these people probably bring it. It's that you know, they're like,, here you go. And he's like, ah, fucking I'm out. Just whatever they charge me, I'm out. I understand.

I understand. I get that. Your point's fucking stupid. It's just insane. This is a fucking. I can't stand it. Really? Tell me why.

Because I don't like. What a waste. It's wasteful. It's wasteful, but bro. No, no, no, but this is a big, even when I, listen, I can't stand, you go out to dinner with people, you know, and then they over order or something, and then they don't finish their food.

In a way that you look like, oh man, you're wasting. I can't stand waste like that. I just can't, so when I see this I go, this is just like, he's not gonna be this wealthy for his whole life. Right, right, right. Facts, Eric, you know what it is? I look at it and I go, he's just immature.

Yeah! That's all, he's immature as fuck. Dude, there's stories. Facts, Eric, you know what it is? I look at it, I go, he's just immature. Yeah! That's all, he's immature as fuck. Dude, there's stories that Alan Iverson used to be like this, like he would go on a road and he would never pack. He would just buy new clothes and just leave it. Every city. You know? Yup.

And now he's broke, but luckily, Not now, but. No, no, luckily he had a business guy who took care of him, invested in some Reebok stuff, so he's gonna get this money. But I'm saying, this guy doesn't watch, they should be 30 for 30 for rappers. Oh, that's good.

You know what I mean? I watch that. You know what I mean? Call 50 for 50. Yeah, cause where's special Ed right now? Has anyone ever gone like this? Special Ed. And I mean with these exact words.

Lil Baby is really talented has anyone ever said that like that I bet probably not. You could say like yo he lit he fire oh he's dope he's fucking killing it but has anyone nobody said that. You know what it is, cuz I'm old right I think that and not even just that forget being old being a comic when you're a comic and you grow up poor or whatever unless you like, you know from a rich family Do we got money when I was my? Teasing you but what I'm saying is a better example What I'm saying is you learn how to be frugal because you understand how hard this process is and the value of money

That guy. Yeah, does not value money. He doesn't understand money. He got famous when he was a baby. A very little baby to be honest. If you give somebody a million dollars. I don't think he didn't grow up rich. I think he just feels entitled now. He's probably from the hood, came up with nothing. Now he just has all this shit and he's just taking it for granted. He's just immature as fuck. That's my whole point. Now he just has all this shit and he's just like taking it for granted. No, no, no, no. He's just immature as fuck. That's my whole point.

I don't think people understand the value of what it costs to live, what it costs, and then the future. Like, you know what I mean? People go broke easy. Like a million dollars, that's not a lot of money. Like I'm just- Not nowadays. I'm just being 100.

I mean, you could live off it and fuck it. No, no, no, depending on your lifestyle. I used to, like, if you, like. Empuria. Yeah, even still, but here's the thing about people, what happens to people. In North Hollywood, you'll be alright. What happens to people, like, if like,

I don't know what people's rent are, like, what's your rent, Nick? What's your rent, Kevin? 3,700. Alright, so 3,700. If you were given a million dollars, would you move? Yeah. Okay.

Then you're fucked. And that's the thing, that's what happens to people. So what I'm saying, if I gave you a million dollars and you stayed at that 3700, you'd be living fat. Yeah, you'd be dying in that place though, eventually. I know, but what happens is, are you gonna get a better car? You probably gonna get a better car.

Yeah, there you go, bro. You know, you're gonna be like you know think about your wife you have your girl does she want to go to the good Pilates now yeah I love that BBL what I'm saying is this is what happens your lifestyle changes this lifestyle creep in this lifestyle also known as lifestyle inflation is a phenomenon where your spending increases your income rises facts it's gradual and often unconscious. Dude, tendency to spend more on non-central items

experiences like cool cars and trucks. What the fuck? I gotta talk to my wife in the mirror when we're there. Dude, hey sweetie, we got that lifestyle creep. We lifestyle creepin', we LC. Good name for the episode. Lifestyle creepin'. Yeah.

That's why creep on that good pilates. No, but you get a better car, you get a better place. You start eating it, you're going to Nobu three times a week. I mean, it just happens. Nobu, Nobu, Nobu. What I'm saying is, but what this guy's doing is 10 times beyond that.

He's the lifestyle jump. Yeah, he ain't creeping. Lifestyle jumping. Yeah, and that's- Bro, how much you think that Airbnb, that $14 million Airbnb for 30 days? Lifestyle jumping. Yeah, and that's. Bro, how much you think that Airbnb, that $14 million Airbnb for 30 days? Lifestyle jumping. Yeah, you need to like, what do you call it?

We need to trademark that. Lifestyle jumping. Yeah, do lifestyle jumping. I come up with good coin terms, bro. Woo, that's gonna spread. Let's let that spread. LifeRips.com camo out there on ChrisLia.com. We should make merch.

Dude, make some homie hopper merch. I'm about to lifestyle jump motherfuckers. We should make some merch lifestyle jump. That's going like, on the picture it's like you're in a shack that you jump and there's a mansion. That guy's ridiculous. You're in the tub like Tupac with the gold chains all around him, you know that picture?

I love that fucking picture dude, I gotta get like that. No you don't. I don't fit in the tub though, I'm tall. I'm a tall drink of water. I'd be lanky outside the tub but you have to have- Is Tupac in there with another dude because he's gay as fuck, right? We've been over this.

There he goes. Don't look at me with that, that's your guy. It didn't, that's- Did I look at you with that? It's well documented. I didn't look at you with it. This is fucking- When the fat jumps were coming.

Here's how you know that it's bullshit is Brendan said it's well documented. Yeah, yeah, anytime he says that. Okay, Nick, look up Tupac, gay well documented. Yeah. Yeah. Anytime he says that. Okay, Nick look Hey, stop stop stop document creeping No Tupac was raised by his mother dude. He didn't have a father in his life You've never seen that part where he's where he's like, okay, he's fucking he's using his hands and stuff

There is no credible evidence besides Brendan Chob that the rumors speculations about his sexual life, sir. Girl. Am I right? Services youth. Oh wait, a tent ready. There's just a few key red flags here. Attend a performance art school and defended the LBGTQ back in the 80s.

When it was cool. He wouldn't do that now. I'm kidding. I'm joking. Well, he wouldn't probably, well, he would probably have an issue that the trans shit was in it, but anyway, I'm just saying that's not my beliefs. It's my beliefs. But yeah, I, he'd be in a rap battle with Lil Nas or whatever that guy's name is. I would be I would be interested in what to I would be very interested in what Tupac would be saying today about Trump. That's

what I would be very interested because he was he would talk outwardly. I don't say against Trump but he would be like why he was very big on why do you have all this money and there's people dying you know what I mean on the streets. He's very big on that. And so I thought I could give to fuck what Tupac thinks about the political climate. No, no, but that's the kind of stuff that, you know. Make some more fucking tracks, dude. What, what does it mean? Just make music. Oh, God, it tracks.

Just make music, just dribble, you know? That's racist. Oh, God. Did you guys see this? No. That's racist. Incredible chick fight. Ooh, they're not bad looking either. There's some titties.

Oh, that, oh, oh, oh, oh. Stop them. They always fight like this. That one has some sort of Latina in it, I knew it was gonna be a problem. Get off of her, bitch! Teal, she's holding her nose. Oh, look at the girl.

Oh, she did a kick. She takes three of them off. They always pull hair. The hair thing is shit. Oh, Jesus. That girl's getting her ass whacked. She just pulled her off and left. Oh, her tits out.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That girl's titty popped out. Oh, fuck. Oh, and a kick. Oh, good kick, girl. Oh, wow. Oh. Guard your grill, dude.

Damn big bird with the fucking left hook. Guard your grill, bro. Check the seismic activity on that fall. They're probably fighting over a cock. Let's be honest, bro. Why don't they stop? Hey, ladies, ladies, ladies. Just I hate these kinds of things.

Yeah, that big bitch in the blues in turquoise is a problem. It's like I follow this one. She put her hair up for it. I follow this one where it's like, what is it called? Like, you know, where is it? It's called women equality. Oh, yeah, Nick. Fucking doing that fucking lifestyle creeping.

Yeah, dude. Good job, Nick. That's a Foley, man. What does that mean? Yeah, she's a homie hopper. Yeah, that's a full titty right there dude that thing's all natural too I can tell whether no it's not dude it was it well documented do you don't think that's a real tit looks like it could be fake but you can't tell from now you

don't know shit oh I don't row oh I haven't seen t hey, that's well documented. Hell yeah, I see them titties. Hell yeah, I see them titties. Yeah, you know what's up, speaking of which, my wife has good tits, next. All right, and now mine does too. Next. All right. Now, and now mine does too.

Yeah. Yeah. Dude, I follow this, like, I always love these things. It's like women getting equality, and there's always some woman hitting a guy, and then like, and I'm just. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, and then you just DDT's, or. Yeah.

Fucked up. Yeah. It's like. I get stone cold stuff. Every time, when I just watch it, I go, oh, don't do it. Yep, yep, yep. And I'm even every time I just watch it I go, oh don't do it. And I'm even, to me I'm saying this to the guy. I'm saying to the guy, don't do it.

Oh, oh, oh. You're gonna catch a case. Oh, don't do it. Oh, that's gonna cost you. But the favorite ones are the ones where the guy is obviously giving the person a big chance to stop. You know, I'm saying to the guy, the guy's getting hit, hit, pow, pow, pow,

and he's just looking at her like, okay. So he stops. And then he just goes like this. Gah! Right, right, right. Right. Headbutts.

And she just goes flying, man. Sometimes I just go like, oh man, this is, you know what, it's movies. You ever been hit by a woman? Yeah. Yeah. You ain't shit if you haven't been hit by a woman, bro. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Dude, I've never been hit. Yeah, well, hmm, I wonder why. Because you look like a wife beater. Yeah. Hey, I look nice. Can anyone say war machine? Isn't that the guy? Yeah.

I think you two look hittable. That's the fucking thing. I get that. I certainly understand I'm hittable when I'm the fucking thing. I get that. I certainly understand I'm hittable when I'm like, cause here's what I do a lot. I go, Oh, I'm just asking. And that kind of shit. Fist goes right to your. What's that? I was at the, I'm at the comedy store in the main room doing like a Jerusalem show. So it was like super black. Okay. And then there's, there's girls in the front, these three girls in front of me, they're fucking talking, and I just start going in. You know what I'm saying?

I'm like, tens don't sit in the front row of a show. You know what I mean? I wish I would have been fucking laughing, bro. I was going in, I was like, I remember this, I was like, yeah, these D3 chicks over here talking shit, and this one girl was so mad. Yeah, she was. She had a pants suit on which I was crowned. Oh I wish I was there bro.

But the thing is she came on the stage, but like one foot, she was on the stage and she was standing right next to me and I'm like no one's doing nothing. Of course not. And I'm thinking to myself this is a lose lose for me. Absolutely. You know what I'm saying?

Because if she hits me, you know, whatever response I give, it won't be. They'll either be like, pussy or abuser. Right. Pussy or your abuser. So I just was like, you know, but luckily she didn't do anything. You've always got to get the gab though.

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. She still thinks about that. And let me tell you something. Yeah, she'll never do that again. I had somebody rushed on stage once, a woman, I talked about it in my special, but she had, she came up, I had a, I think I had a, I don't drink, so I must've had some sort of cup or something.

Water? Oh no, no, it was the microphone. I had the microphone and she comes up and grabs the microphone and she, and it hit my face. And I just go, and I sit down. Because like, what can you do? Oh, I know. What can you do? I just, all right got all man. It sucks. Did you have big tits though? They were like the pancake kind She had really frizzy hair

I can't imagine. That's even worse. No, no, dude. Someone gets syrup. It's just bad. It's also weird, like girls that hit. No, they listen. Like over the age of 16, that hit is wild. No, no, they all hit.

They have no control of their emotions. Yeah, well that, yes. And they've never been told, like, hey, you know, this is... Well, what's weird is... You're not Black Widow. Like, if you have a conversation, if conversation if you have yeah these bitches seen too many movies if you if you have a conversation with you know like like like I was talking with my wife and I was like yo you really think that like if a

motherfucker came at you like you're one of those women that's like maybe sorry I messed with me right yeah I And she was like, yeah. And I go, you don't get it. Yeah. You don't get it. And she's like, no, I would kill someone. And I'm like, all right. No, you wouldn't.

You don't get it. One of the funniest videos ever is that Danny McBride video where he's like, you know, they're in like karate gear and he's like doing a thing where he's telling the guy, yeah, this girl, she's been practicing. Oh, dude. Oh, dude. Is that that, that's from that movie?

That movie was funny, bro. And the dude. What the hell is that called? Oh, bro. Is it something fury? Fist of, yeah. Fist of way? Foot fist way, yes.

Foot fist way. Foot fist way, bro. That's just iconic scene. God, that cut scene was great. I just saw, I just saw a funny video from a sketch group. The guys were like, if female action stars in real life, and the girl comes out and then it's just like, they breathe, they die.

They should just fucking. The fuck, guys beat her up. They should just make fun of her as she runs away crying. I was like, oh man. Salt comes down, Angelina Jolie, they go, you're fat. She goes, I'm just walking away. No, but I do believe that.

And you throw a fucking beer bottle out the back of her head. But you know what I do believe in most situations? I mean, not me. I'm just saying in the movie. Stupid guy. When you see something like that in public, you see a guy hit a girl because she did something crazy. There's still a part of me that's like, ah, don't do that. No, no, no. Yeah.

I told them. Oh, every time, every time. It's like, come on. Yeah. No, I mean like, it's like, you guys just take that. But have either your wives, maybe even before you met them, got in a fight? No, I don't know. I don't think so. I don't think so. It's just. And your wife thinks she's fucking Jet Li, Chris? That's why she thinks that, bro. She's never been in a fucking fight. Your wife's obviously been in many fights.

But, but. Your wife's obviously been in many fights. But she had to remove her gang tattoo before they got married. She's MS-13. She calls out hits, but. I want him dead. Like she talks like that. Was she Rosie Perez? Sometimes when you win,

when you win you actually lose. I want him poisoned. Stupid. Yeah, but they have it. They have it. Tell Brenda he can't come home. I'm going to kill him. I just think that she would realize the nature

of what she's saying by just, she, I think that, I think that any woman would have to know if after just having sex one time and then. Well, I'm a real pussy in bed. Really? No, I'm kidding. You're always, what is it I'm trying to say? I'm kidding.

She can't think that. I go really slow. And honestly, you know. She has to feel that. I go really slow. And honestly, you know, She has to feel all that. Even when my wife and I have anal sex, my butt hurts afterwards. So that is your fault. Your pegging is the reason why she thinks she can beat up a guy.

You know, it was a good one. We heard Casey and Chin in the background. Oh, they laughed? Yeah. Oh, I didn't hear that. They love the anal joke. Hell yeah, bro. Chin's like, been there.

Hell yeah, got the fucking bi-coastal, even though it's a third coast. Yes! Jin's all facts. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Jin's like, facts.

He goes, by the way, we didn't record this episode. Hey, but my track record. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Come on, man. Two out of 10 years. come on, baby. I Tell you another funny videos is this like Dorky guy in a car with his girl and and they're talking to his wife or something or something and she keeps hating him Yeah, just he's driving. She's asking that you know, then he goes

After like one more time he goes if you hit me again And then he goes after like one more time, he goes, if you hit me again. Yeah, he's bleeding too. Yeah. And then it just turns it even that little dorky guy I was, I was thinking when you saw how it ended up, I was like, ah, don't do that. Because she was so scared at that point. I'm sorry. The thing is, yeah.

But the thing is, you go, you like as a, as a man, you should, there should be something where you, there should be some kind of law where you give a woman, you say, listen, okay, if this continues, I'm gonna punch you in the face. Yeah. Hey. So now that you know that, if you get punched in the face, it's your fault. Yeah, yeah. Right?

Probable cause. But yeah, so. You know where it gets weird is, and your kids are almost at the age, but when they're like seven or eight, because the girls mature way faster, so an eight year old, nine year old girl is physically bigger, stronger.

When they start trying to bully the boys, I'm like, just fucking hit them, dude. Just fucking sock them. No, no, no'm gonna take I'm gonna tell you something right now Should we add that I was in when I was in the city? Nick fucking put the thing on Nick ruined your story by playing the thing and that's unforgivable. He wanted it cut out anyway, so Bro that was wait, what was that? That was uh, that was just fuck. I'm trying to put a joke together and I can't You'll think of it Can I tell my story when I'm in the sixth grade? There was a bully girl, you know

They're the worst, you know, and I was like and she like Hit me. Yeah, you know, and I hit her back. Mm-hmm Good for you the moment. I hit her back, she turned into a girl. Of course. Yeah. And then I was the villain. Of course. I was like, and that's when I learned you don't hit girls.

Yeah. That's the, you know. Oh, it's a good lesson. Because she was being a bully and shit that hit me. It's a good lesson for you, and I'll tell you what. And I was like, it's a good lesson for her. Because if you never did that, she would have kept bullying everybody. Maybe, but the thing was, but it's also a good lesson for her. Because if you never did that, she would have kept bullying

everybody. Maybe, but the thing was, it was funny how I'm talking, instantly went from whatever to like, oh my god. And everybody was like, oh man. Come on, man. Remember what she was just saying? Right, right, right. You know what I mean?

Y'all forgot? Remember, she was bullying you. She had a real problem. I'm pointing at people like, you were bullying me. She had a real problem. She was like this. Nah, man, nah, man. Nah, man.

And I was like, oh no. Yeah. I remember that lesson. I was like, oh my. You were a villain, dog. Yeah. Nah, T was in summer camp. That was my joker story.

There was this 12 year old girl. 12 year old girl looked like Kevin Durant with tits, man. I was like, bud, you gotta hit her once, dude. And she, you know, you just gotta do it once and she'll know not to fuck with you. He was so scared though. Yeah. I get it.

I wish when I was younger, my dad told me stuff like that. Because not that he said don't fight, but there was never a- You gotta stick up for yourself. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There was never a, I mean, you know, he would tell me to stick up for myself, but it was always with. There was never a... I mean, you know, he would tell me to stick up for myself, but it was always with words.

Like we were a funny family, you know what I mean? But like, so... But like he was... You talk your way out of it. Oh yeah. But, and I learned that real well, but like... I'm all about that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure.

But I wish there was a thing where he was like, this person's fucking with you and he's not stopping. Then you gotta stand up for yourself, hit him. I tell my kids that every day and then Tiger got to stand up for yourself. Hit him. I tell my kids that every day and then tiger's always, he's different than bossy. Tiger's always where he's in trouble. I'm like, but I'll handle that. Don't you worry. I'll deal with the principal or the teachers. Don't worry about that. Like he's in the summer camp now. And one of the dads called me and was like, yeah,

I guess there was this kid bullying him. Like, what the fuck? Bullying my son. He's like, yeah, I'm like, dude, what the fuck? So I picked Tiger up and like, dude, what's going on? He's like, yeah, I'm like, dude, what the fuck? So I picked Tiger up, I'm like, dude, what's going on? He's like, dad, there's this 12 year old boy and he bullied me and then listed his two friends. I go, hold on, stop, stop, stop. He bullied all three of you? He goes, Yago.

At the same time, he goes, Yago. All right, now you, I told him, I said, now I'm upset. There's three of you? I knew that's what it was. I knew that's what it was. I knew that's what it was. That's hilarious. No one said, let's get this motherfucker.

No one, you just all stood there and took it. Why bullied the three of you one by one? Some ho shit, doc. He didn't eat that night. Yeah, he should have just been. Wow. Brandon feels like he should have taken charge. All right, I'm gonna go high.

You go low. You punch him in the stomach. Go! The three of you. My son is, you go low, you punch him in the stomach. Go! The three of you. My son is, for some reason, obsessed with being a good boy. It's really adorable, but also heartbreaking, because you're like, you are a good boy, you know? But he's like, he'll be like,

like today, or last night, I was putting him to bed, and he was like, I don't need my sleep sack anymore, I'm a big boy. And I'm like, oh don't need my sleep sack anymore, I'm a big boy. And I'm like, oh, no, you can use your sleep sack as a blanket. And he was like, no, but I'm a big boy. And then I'm like, no, it's okay. And then he starts crying and I'm like, what's wrong buddy?

And he was like, I just wanna be a good boy and I want you to be, like, I'm like, dude, where do I give you this thought? Dude, their brains work differently. You probably saw Spider-Man, this is the Green Goblin fucking origin story, dude. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha ha.

Kid's here. Cob is just on a surfboard and I, ha ha ha ha ha. I'm a good boy. Ha ha ha ha ha. But it breaks your heart though, dude. Ah, Nick, quickly. Ha ha ha ha. No, but you know, know it's like that's my fear too. It's like anything you say because you hear later you know you hear these people

talk about later in therapy like why are you like this? Well it's because when I was young my dad said something and it's not even like you were being... No I know it's not your dad's fault. Yeah it was a throwaway. They fucking took it to heart and got a tattoo on their fucking ribs. Exactly, exactly. It's like. Yeah. They're still young, man.

They're so young. No, I know. They're still not who they are yet. Because I pride myself on how I talk to, I was with him for an hour and a half last night when he was trying to go to bed and he was worried about stuff and I was sitting there.

I sat there for an hour and a half and you went over your set I know yeah yeah I was wanted to see what what he would laugh at but I want to open with this I'm gonna be upside down Calvin what do you think about Calvin help me I want to try some crowd work real quick. Just give me something. Where you from? You! So, uh. So, um. No, you know what it is Chris,

that I think, cause we know that the world's a dangerous place man. And soft, like sweet people get fucking ran over. That's my biggest fear. Yeah, I know, I know. Photoshop, fat pictures, fat jokes. Yeah, I know what I know. Photoshop, fat pictures, fat jokes. Yeah, I know what you mean. Yeah, I mean, I know my son's gonna have that wit.

You just don't want him to be a pushover. Right, right. And again, you don't know. Send him to Dagestan for a year. I know, I'm sending him to Dagestan. When he's 15, 16 and he's being rebellious, you're gonna be like, what happened to Good Boy? No, I know, I know, I know.

You know what I mean? So who knows what's gonna happen?? No, I know, I know, I know, I know. So who knows what's gonna happen, you know what I'm saying? I'll just turn his Tesla off. And this guy, was this at the baseball stuff, he was getting bullied, you know? It's probably some kid who's like, seeing this kid who's better than him younger, you know what I mean, that's just how people are.

Yeah, tease the new kid, but three of you, no one was like, fuck this, let, it's three of us, let you jump this fucking idiot? You just need the new kid. But three of you, no one was like, fuck this. Let's it's three of us. Let's jump. Yeah, I just need the parental. That dude's just trying to see what he can get away with. Parental support is what you need, man. That's all it is.

I told you guys this before. I remember riding the school bus and this guy was bullying me. My mom said tomorrow, I want you to punch him in the face. Good. You know, good mama. You know, and I did. Good. I got suspended.

Good. You know, from the bus. Because Eric, I bet you didn't want to do it before cuz you're worried about the consequences hit him right yeah that's tiger he's always what I mean fuck your principal dude my mom drove me to school and made sure to park in front of the bus that I you know she had you hit mitts before you get off the bus no no no she when I was suspended she would drive me to school and then she would make sure I was she would park in front of the Bus that I usually ride in and I would just get out the car. Yeah

bro, I Your mom are so awesome. Yeah, I love your mom Yeah, I got a real I mean, I know I got to I know I I know it was you know at the end there But I'm so happy I got to meet her and she was like, you know, you know Let me see you guys you had your dad in your life Yeah you had your dad in your life because You had your dad in your life. Cause like, I've been looking at these like videos

and stuff and trying to figure out like, and here's something that I saw, it was like, you know, like roughhousing with your son when you're young is really important. So I was like, and I was like, oh man, that's like, who would tell you that? How would you even know that? So, and I love doing it.

And like right now, Wolf is like all about it. You all about it same same Calvin and Billy both look at each other. I pick't even have that. Yeah. Damn, man. Damn. Damn, dog. Why do Eric like that? Nick's a bully. He just gave that heartfelt story. I gotta go punch Nick in the fucking face right now, everybody, so thanks for watching Golden Hour.

Do it on camera. I love how the shirt is open on the bottom. Yeah, that's the part I don't like. And you still have the good jeans on. Yeah, well, and they're the bottom. Yeah, that's the part I don't like. And you still have the good jeans on. Yeah, and they're buttoned. Wow. Wow. I gotta get a new shirt in this.

Everything else is cool. What did you just say, AI, make it fatter? Yeah. No, you just goes, more. No, I go, even fatter. No. No. No.

And then he goes, I thought you'd never ask. That sends the thing. I think we should, you know what we should do here? We should get a scale, and I'll just do, I'll you'd never ask. And that's the thing. I think we should, you know what we should do here? We should get a scale and I'll just do, I'll start doing weigh-ins. Keep you accountable? Yeah, you know what I mean? I need to be accountable. Yeah, you got this here.

Come on, Doug. All right, I'll be in Indianapolis this next weekend, Irvine, California, Huntsville, Alabama, Miami, Florida, Houston, Texas, and go to Chrislee.com. My next shows are coming up is the, I'll be in Tacoma. The Nate Jackson Comedy Club in Tacoma. I think that's the 13th. And then I'm gonna be at Madison Square Garden with Matt Rife on the 18th and 19th.

That's cool. Yeah, that's gonna be great. Ooh wee. Ooh wee, so see you guys. All right kids, love ya, we're out. The Hey, this is Adam Carolla from the Adam Carolla Show. Summer is here and podcast one has a brand new sports podcast. It's the all-new Pac-Man Jones show called Politely Raw. Now on podcast one join former NFL star and Pro Bowl cornerback

Pac-Man Jones as he brings you his unfiltered takes, raw interviews and stories as only he can tell them. If you love sports, culture and controversy you're going to love Politely Raw as nothing is off-limits. This makes for an entertaining and compelling listen each and every time. The new Pac-Man Jones show, Politely Raw. Episodes drop weekly and are available wherever you find podcasts.