The Golden Hour - Luke Beige | The Golden Hour #64 w/ Brendan Schaub, Erik Griffin & Chris D'Elia

Episode Date: January 26, 2024

The guys give a quick update on Brendan and talk Will Smith movies, best action stars, O.J. Simpson conspiracies, Chris meeting Sammy The Bull, Jo Koy and Jim Gaffigan's impressive glow ups, couples sleeping with separate blankets, moving objects with your mind, crazy dream stories, Chris' son seeing a ghost and much more! Get two extra episodes every month at https://patreon.com/thegoldenhourpodcast DraftKings - Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app NOW and use code GOLDEN Nugenix - Get a complimentary bottle of Nugenix Total T plus a bottle of Nugenix Thermo X FREE when you text GOLDEN to 231-231.

We're friends that laugh, we're friends that shout Sometimes we don't know what we're talking about But that won't stop us Nothing can stop us It's like a show you used to love Just rebranded enough It's stronger, better, bigger power Cause it is the Golden Hour

It's the Golden Hour No Brendan today. He canceled his gigs in Nashville this weekend. Austin. Austin because he's not going to be there because his daughter unfortunately had to go into emergency surgery so he not going to be there because his daughter, unfortunately, had to go into emergency surgery. So he's going to be dealing with that. It's, you know, it's a tough, it's really tough.

It's tough for him. And we're all waiting to hear. So that's why he's not here today as well. So he has to cancel the gigs. He's got no choice. He's got to be there as a dad for his family and his wife and all that stuff. So our heart goes out to him. Our heart goes out to him.

Send out your thoughts and prayers for him. Send him nice messages on Instagram. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Love you, B, and you'll get through it. So anyway, tough to start a podcast on that note, but we're here doing it, filling in without him, and it's all good. Because sometimes, honestly, I'm not here. you know, without him. And it's all good. Because sometimes, honestly, I'm not here.

Sometimes you're not here. So it's about time. He's not here, honestly. You know what I'm saying? It's like fun. You're making it sound like that. No, the guy's – he's always here, honestly. He maybe wasn't here once.

Yeah, I think he's only – I think in the history of me being here, like once or twice. I don't think he's ever missed. He's left early, but he always comes. Dude, I was watching, I was looking at Netflix, and remember that Will Smith movie, Bright? Oh, yeah, I remember that movie, yeah. Did you like it? I don't remember.

Oh, I loved this movie. But anyway, it was like in 2007, I believe it was. And they just recently, after the slap, they canceled making the sequel. But for me, it's like, I think it's crazy when they're trying to make a sequel for something that isn't like, it didn't happen maybe, say, a couple years ago. Yeah. Like, they're doing an I Am Legend sequel. That's 15 years ago yeah like they're doing an i am legend sequel well 15 years ago well their start well the reason why they're doing that is because they're

they they feel like the fan bases are giving money off of it right but still no no no i agree they do they do this a lot though what's the statute of limitations do you think for for like a movie was probably seven eight years ago that that's too much. Yeah. No, I agree. I agree. I agree. That was a great movie. It should be like four. I think that movie got panned.

I know, but I loved it. Okay. No, I'm just saying. I'm saying because I think I'm trying to think of that. It was with Joel Edgerton, right? Where he was the alien or whatever. No, no. He was an orc.

Right, right, right, right, right. No, but this was, see, at the time, this was one of the first. That script sold for a lot of money, I remember. But at the time, this was one of the first times it was like big budget movie.

The big, first big, one of the first big Netflix. Yeah, going on Netflix. So it was kind of like, whoa, what is this? Right, right, right. But now it's like no big deal. Right, I know, right.

You know, there's so many. Are you, so wait, you, I was looking at Netflix and it was one of those, you know, jump back into or because you watch. And I was like, oh yeah, bright. So then I Googled it and I was like, Netflix and it was one of those, you know, jump back into or because you watch. And I was like, oh, yeah, Bright. So then I Googled it.

I was like, is there a Bright 2? And it was like Bright 2 officially canceled. Because of the slap? Yeah, because of the Will Smith. Really? And I thought to myself, all right, what are we talking about? That's stupid. People are going to get over this.

That's hilarious. You know what I mean? I think they just didn't want to invest the money. I think it was like an excuse. Oh, yeah. Yeah, because that was the – It was an expensive movie. It was a very expensive movie.

And then also – So that movie, I remember – Yeah, it got so many views. How weird is it, though, that there's these movies, like Bright, huge movies, that you just forget about nowadays? Dude. You never used to do that. Dude, I'm in the middle of watching series that I like.

Maybe you go to like you're on Prime or something. Then you go back to it and you go, oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm on episode five of this. So I forget about things fast. But it's so crazy. The content. It's like it's not even movies now.

It's content. It's just like it's like, oh, what's next? What's next? What's next? What's next? I started watching this show, Criminal Record, last night. It's a British show.

What's that on? It's Apple TV. It's a new one. It just came out. It's like the first three episodes. And I'm like, all right, I'd watch it, but it doesn't have

the fourth episode out yet. And I'm like, I'm not forgetting about this show in three. What were we talking about? Dude, I know, used to have like, remember when you used to have DVR? So there's no DVR anymore because you're just like, I have YouTube TV. You could record stuff.

But my rule now is if four episodes I haven't watched, I'm done. I know. I just go, I don't really like this show I know And it's It's not even It's not a bad show It's interesting

It's just I'm not gonna care next week When the next one comes out No no but you'll check in again When you see like Oh there's three episodes to watch Maybe Maybe

But I genuinely Give up on A lot of these shows Like dude I'll Yo My favorite was Lukeke cage was that the one oh luke wait i love luke so yeah it was good and i that it was a good show i think it was 10 episodes yeah yo i watched nine and a half why i had to do something i had to do something why

didn't you check back in and get the big conclusion? Hey, I still didn't. I just didn't. I don't care. I wanted to spoof this and call it Luke Beige. Oh, my God. That's funny. Although I don't like.

And it's you? Yeah. I'm Luke Beige. I don't like. Protecting the neighborhood. I don't like just. Black, big, strong black guys. Things that are based off of one title.

Just the title. I always think that that's a recipe for disaster. Give me an example. Me, myself, and Irene. They made it because of the title. Oh. I don't even... I probably had funny moments. But I'm just saying

if you make something based off the title. Although if it's a spoof that's kind of the idea of it. So it doesn't really matter. Yeah, but Luke Cage is like – No, I get the joke, bro. No, Cage, I'm just – like I'm saying he wasn't like in a cage. No, I do get it. It didn't open up with a guy in a cage.

My name is Luke. He's caged, you know, in his mind, right? He has a cage in his mind, right? Adam Carolla would do a bit where he had people call in and give fake names of movies. Yeah. And then from there, we're gonna, I think you did it one time with that. Did I? You were John Klein Van Damme. Yeah. But what was the bit, what was the

name of the movie? I don't remember. But people would just say a title of a movie. And you'd have to guess if it was real or not? No, they'd make it up and then he would just say what it's about. Oh, that guy's good. Yeah, he's unbelievable at that kind of stuff. Cast it, give the whole story.

Those were the days, though, man. What? Like, 80s, 90s, where just you would follow a star. Like, you don't do that anymore. Right. Think about that. I mean, yeah, you know. Like, Jean-Claude Van Damme would be like, all right, I know all his movies.

Yeah, I know. The one where he was a twin. I know. Then there was the – Double Impact. Double Impact. Wait, Rufflick in? Oh, he has some good ones. Which was the one with Dennis Rodman?

Was that Double Impact? Double Team. Double Team. Oh, Jesus. There were two? Oh, God. There was two with Double in it? Okay.

But – Imagine you're pitching those. What's Double Impact then? Was that even with him? Deep Impact are you thinking? Oh Morgan Freeman? Was there a movie?

Deep Impact was the Water movie right? No That was the The asteroid movie Yeah but Water 2 Double Impact as well That was the twin one

Oh my gosh Yeah He had two double movies And he did The Replicant Which is Multiple Oh really? Oh yeah Well anytime You're a Yeah, he had two double movies. And he did The Replicant, which is multiple. Oh, really? Oh, yeah.

Well, anytime you're a star, an action star, you're going to do a movie where there's a few of you. What's crazy now is that movie right there came out in the theaters. Right. That's nuts. Now that would be a Delta Airlines flight movie. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It would be made by Delta Airlines. It would be a Delta Airlines flight movie. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It would be made by Delta Airlines.

It would be Delta Productions, dude. Those movies. And you'd be like, Delta's come out with a streaming service. All right, cool. Doesn't it feel like that? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But the only way to watch the show is you have to. What if you had to finish the episodes, you had to fly Delta?

You're like, this is a finale we gotta go to Arizona they got me hooked on this new show I gotta go to fucking Indianapolis to finish the last three episodes

that was the first one right Bloodsport that's the best one yeah I never saw that you never saw Bloodsport nah oh my god

never saw that one saw all of the other all all of the other ones that'd be awesome if you watched it and gave a review of it. It is incredible. Yeah, Bloodsport is.

All I know is that shit where he hits the guy like that and it's got the fucking thing. Does it not, dude? Be like, oh yeah, or something. It's true. When he had something in his eyes. Yes, yes, yes. There we go. Did you see that show where he played himself and he was a spy?

Oh, no. That show was so funny. It was supposed to be, right? It was funny as hell. Was it supposed to be? It was called JCVD, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's it.

Was it supposed to be funnier, though? Yeah. Okay. I didn't see that one. He was totally making fun of himself. That came out like eight years ago. Was it that long ago? Yeah, not even, right? Yeah. But I mean didn't see that one. He was totally making fun of himself. But that came out like eight years ago. Was it that long ago? Yeah, not even, right?

Yeah. But I mean, it was so funny. I'm surprised that they canceled it. Oh, was it a show? Yeah, it was a show. He was playing himself. Oh, wow. It was five years ago.

Yeah, he was playing himself. Being a movie star was a cover for him being an international hitman or something. I thought it was great. This looks like it might not be funny. It was funny. I like when people are aware of themselves. I do too, but also his movies are already just so funny. Yeah, but not on purpose.

But that's why. I know. But at this point now, when you look this old, you know what I mean? Like in his mind, he thinks he looks 31 right here. You think? Yeah. He doesn't look bad. No, I know.

Yeah, I know. I know what you're saying. He's an impressive guy. He definitely has his wife suck his bodyguard off and stuff. You know? Like there's no way. There's no fucking way. Just because.

Look at him. Oh, this was his thing. The splits. Yeah. Remember? This used to be his thing. Why, he could still do it? But this can't be real.

I think it was. It was a big deal. Wow, that's crazy. I want the cars not to be too far away. Yeah, but what happens? Is there a point? What does he do at this point if he's like, come together, come together?

Closer, closer. Wow. That's crazy, bro. You know, I remember this. To be the driver? I might have been the driver. You cough. You just hear this.

You just get a phone call. You're just. And you accidentally kill Jong- call. You're just. Yeah. Oh. And you accidentally killed John Falkland there. But remember when being, doing the splits? He made that like really. Yeah. Like a cool thing.

Yeah. Yeah. And I never. Did you ever do it? Can you ever do the splits? The splits, no. I still, I honestly still try. When I go to the gym, I stretch. I try to do the splits.

Why? Because I want to. I want to do it. I've never done it. I can get pretty far. I'm 43, and it's going to be like, that would be dope if I got it when I was like 44 or something. Well, he's 60 and still going. Well, because he started with it, though.

I'm saying to get to it. Oh, he opened with splits. Yeah. The first movie should have been called Splits. Double Split. I think Van Damme might have been my favorite, actually, I think. Of that genre? Well, you know, look, I think Stallone's my favorite, but they were so – it was Stallone and Schwarzen Schwarzenegger, if you say they're your favorite, obviously.

But Van Damme was my favorite. And then I don't know if I would consider this person this kind of star, but Bruce Willis was the best action hero. Yeah, but— But he's an actor. He's an actor. No, no. The thing with Bruce Willis, that was like middle-aged men were like, look, we could do this. That's what that was.

These guys were like. Started that way. Got it. These guys were like, you know. Yeah. Bodybuilders. Right, right, right. You know what I mean?

Oh, I see what you're saying. You know what I mean? I see what you're saying. John Fogg was a kung fu expert or whatever, you know. Right, right. Bruce Willis was just a dude that like, you know, stopped a terror strike and terror strike right right right thing yeah i guess that was pretty funny how they did that like they just like stallone was so or i'm sorry uh what do you call it uh because bruce willis when he did die hard a lot of people were like no we're not i'm passing on this movie yeah yeah so and then that

just became like this oh wow big to the point where they made like he had a kid. Yeah, well, Die Hard was his age. They're still making Die Hards. He's going to be dead. They're going to make him with his likeness. No, the last one will be just he's. Yeah, Die Hard. Bruce is dead.

They keep waiting for him to die. They call it Die Hard. Poor guy. Yeah, I know yeah. He won't die. They call it die hard. Poor guy. Yeah, I know. I know. I know. He was, God, he was my favorite, dude. Yeah.

Bruce Willis was just the shit. You know, movie stars were the shit, man. That's what I'm saying. There's no movie star. Okay, but here's the thing. Timothee Chalamet. Oh, my God. Okay.

Yeah, bro, I'm with you. I'm i'm with you but also this is what they look like now you know i know spider-man even the kid yeah yeah it's like they're not they don't look like you know i guess ryan gosling you could argue but he's more of an actor but he's old now too ryan gosling might be like 50 right now he's 42 maybe. How old is Ryan Gosling? Maybe my age. But Chalamet, oh, he's my age, yeah. Chalamet. You might as well be 50

if you're 43. I don't know. I feel like 50 and above. Well. I'm saying 43. Here's the thing, dude. Yeah, no, no. I get it.

I think that this generation of people, they want it to be young, like actual young. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like Ryan Gosling would probably be, for young people, be like, oh, he's like, oh, how does he 40?

You know what I mean? That's the thing for him now. But Timothee Chalamet, I thought for sure nobody would give a fuck about a Wonka origin story. And I think that they didn't. I think that they went to see because of Timothee Chalamet is my point. I don't think anybody saw this movie. No, no, no. It did well.

What's well? Look it up, Nick. It was number one. Look it up. Okay, look it up. Because only two movies come out a week now. All right. No, no, no. It did well. What's well? Look it up, Nick. It was number one. Okay, look it up. Because only two movies come out a week now. All right. Well, that's fair enough.

But look it up. Look it up what it did. I mean, that's a lot. Oh, wow. That's a lot. Oh, my God. What? Yeah. I heard this was terrible, too.

Well, I'm sure it is. I mean, of course it's terrible. Should we go watch it together? Oh, God. That's a killing, though. Yeah, that is a killing. Considering how much it cost to make the movie. I mean, even if it cost $200 million, which it didn't.

Yeah. Yeah. Wow. Okay, well, he's a star. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. I love Dune. I really love that movie. Nah, that movie was fucking so stupid.

Oh, my God. I know. Here's where we part ways. This happens to me. I have this on my desk. And just for no reason, I'm playing video games or I'm grabbing something and that's how it happens all fucking day. Good, good, good.

Just by the way. I almost threw it. I made a lot of money on those. What's up with this, dude? His chin? Come on dude It could be a cats in the wild Chin in the wild

But he's just got a funny Kind of a debate club It wasn't for us But we're going to use it When people are out I hate when he does that When people are out your house Working on things like a maintenance person.

Currently, we have the washing machine guy working on our washing machine. And I don't know where I'm supposed to be. Like, am I supposed to ignore him kind of and just pretend he's not here and go about my day? I certainly don't want to be like hovering over him either. So I'm currently in the stairwell just in case he needs to call me or something because I don't know what I'm supposed to do. Is this normal behavior or

I don't know. Yeah, you're basically in the taint. You know, you're like, what is it? What do I do? You feel like a helper. You're like, do you need a wrench? Yeah, yeah. Water? You know, you want. You're like, you need a wrench? Yeah. Water? You want water?

You know what I mean? How long are you going to be here? Do you need something? I'm going to order food. You get to that point. But yeah, no. Washing machine guy is the number one guy like that. Plumber.

Oh, we just had the plumber. Yeah. And where were you? So what did you do? Check this out. I call the people. I say, yeah, we need the tub. Well, I know you were there. No.

You weren't there? Just Rachel? This is what I'm saying. We need the tub fixed. Okay? Okay. So then, you know, days go by. The lady says, he's going to come.

End of day Thursday. All right. Thursday passes. And we're like, where's the tub guy? You know? And then I get an email. Oh, he came. So then I look on my camera.

And sure enough, the guy comes to the door. Yeah. He knocks on the door. We're in a three-story thing, and he knocks like we're going to hear. Because he gets a townhouse thing. So he comes in, goes and fixes the tub, and leaves. No notification. And I'm seeing the guy on the camera like, oh, my God.

And Rachel was upstairs asleep. And I wrote them an email and I was like, hey, you would have scared the living shit out of my wife. The baby would have came out. Yeah, which would be great. The baby would have went like, oh. He wouldn't know what to do. What do we do?

Do we wait? Whoa, that's. Yeah, dude. So I was like, I said to the guy like, yeah, man. And I see the guy on the camera just kind of like knocking on the door. It's like if you live in a big... And there's a doorbell thing right there. I have a ring camera.

Yeah. He didn't ring it. He didn't ring it. You know, so now I got to put that when anytime I make a request. Ring the doorbell. Bro, they don't care. You're in a big place. You go, you go. They don't want to work. Hello. Ring the doorbell. Bro, they don't care. You're in a big place. You go.

They don't want to work. Hello. Yeah. Who are you talking to? Dude. To the door. Hey. Dude.

Yeah. They don't want to work. Bro, I had a sign made to put on my door that said, don't ring the doorbell. Don't knock. baby is sleeping. One out of five times they'll knock. I had a sign made. It's nice. It's hanging on the door.

There's no way to miss it. You know what you should have made? You have words on there. It should have been like a cartoon. That is probably way to miss it. You know what you should have made? You have words on there. It should have been like a cartoon. That is probably a really great idea. Here's the doorbell with the finger and then the Ghostbusters. God, people are idiots, huh? Yeah, dude. You get people

that can't read. Yeah, true, actually. That's why they're doing that stuff. You know what I mean? Or they just got here so they don't put them in instead of putting them in massage parlors,'t put them in instead of like putting them in massage parlors. Yeah. They put them in like grub hub.

Yeah. You know? Yeah, no jerking off. Yeah. So that's what happened because I, you know,

this is where I can't stand when they can't figure out the, your thing doesn't work. So I have to walk out and get the food. Oh, no. Dude,

I walk out, I just walk out, I grab the food like this and I go like this. Good. Good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good. See how of the pool like this, and I go like this. Good. Then I go like this. Good, good, good, good, good, good, good, good. You see how it's working?

Good, good. You see how it's working? Good, good, good. Wow, Krista would be so mad if I did that. Krista wants everyone to be nice and always be fucking happy and everything, and nobody has to do it. There's consequences, dude. Let's take a break.

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Yeah. Dude, what happened recently? I was like, I fucking had to put somebody in their place and I couldn't do it because Kristen was there. Oh, no. And then I have to eat it. I have to eat that. And later on it becomes cancer. You have to have some kind of signal with Calvin.

Bro. You have to have a signal with Calvin. It's got... You have to have some kind of signal with Calvin. Calvin, like, it's gotta be like the thing where Calvin I need to go off on somebody, get mommy away.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, that's good. That's good. Calvin is like, mommy, can you... I have to go potty. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey.

Yeah. The fucking code works, asshole. Dude. Kristen comes back and you're just like this, you fucking dude. Dude, he's all rough just like this. You fucking dude. Dude,

he's all roughed up. Yeah. So everything's great, babe. Yeah, it's fine. It's fine. You got a shiv in his side.

Don't say shit. Then she's just, what's this on TMZ? What's up with this? When's this baby coming, dude? Dude. They're slow cooking it.

Wait, dude, we went to, first of all. It's been 11 months. Yeah, dude. It's like this baby's going to be 15 pounds. You wait, dude We went to First of all It's been 11 months Yeah, dude It's like this baby's gonna be 15 pounds You know, so we

Hey Yeah, yeah What up, dad? Like, oh, shit So we went to this, like There's a place in North Hollywood That you can go that Supposedly it's called the baby salad

Okay, what is that? I don't know You get this You eat this salad Oh It's supposed to help Oh, I've heard about this Induce

So, you know. You did it? Yeah. You ate it too, huh? And I'm like. Something's coming out. Yeah, something's coming out of me. It didn't work, you know.

Yeah. Because it doesn't work. Right. That's what I said. Like, if there's some chemical in the dressing, that would be illegal, right? Yeah, it would be illegal. And also, what is it? And bottle it up, right?

Inducement. Yeah. Dude, my, what would she be? She's my wife's aunt. So, my in-law, aunt-in-law, whatever. She was like, dude, to make a baby come out, you have to drink something like motor oil. Castor oil. Yeah.

That's not food, right? No. That's disgusting. You die, don't you? Yeah. You know, maybe you're making your... It would be like putting tear gas in your stomach. That's how you get the baby out, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And the baby comes out. You know, that's how you would the baby out, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And the baby comes out.

You know, that's how you would do that. Yeah, so Rachel mentioned that the other day. She was like... Look at these. Old wives tales. Sex, number one. They do... I've heard doctors say sex works.

Those are cursed. Some horny-ass doctors. Nipple stimulation. That's on you. Try it, Eric, right now. You got to do it like that. Well, we've tried all these things. Spicy food.

This is crazy. But that's weird because it hurts. You put it in her pussy, it hurts her pussy. Pineapple, too. You got to do it like that. Well, we've tried all these things. Spicy food. This is crazy. But that's weird because it hurts. You put it in her pussy, it hurts her pussy. Pineapple too. You got to do the inside. Raspberry leaf tea. I make that for her all the time. Really?

Yeah. Wait, go back up, Nick. I want to see. It's pineapple. I have to cut pineapples almost every day. You do this? Yeah. Because she thinks it works maybe?

Yeah, because she says pineapples makes your cervix soft. Oh, wow. She just wants pineapples. Soft. Castor oil. Come on. Soft-ass cervix. Walking.

We walk. We'll walk. I didass cervix. Walking. We walk. I did the acupressure, too. What is that? What is acupressure? It's like, you know, when you have a headache. Bumpy car rides. I try that, too. I just...

Is it out yet? Send her with Brendan. Yeah, she... Oh, no. Hilarious. He's talked about it, I think. It's like, the baby. You know, so I don't know.

We've done all these things. When we went to go get the salad, I was driving crazy. What is the salad? Dude, I don't know. And how did they market this bullshit, by the way? And there's a wall in the restaurant that says baby something. This is so stupid. Hold on a second. What began as a California restaurant

serving a mysterious... Whoops! He turned off. Pregnant patrons who hoped it would kickstart their labor has grown into a legend that has overdue women across the country

mail ordering the salad dressing. Yeah. Yeah. Cody and pizza. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hilary Duff is the latest celebrity to turn to the salad for some help with labor.

Okay, well, I mean, this is one of those things that obviously isn't true. So just stop. We went. It was a good salad. I had a good pasta from there. Hillary Duff's cool, though. That's not real, is it? Yeah, no, I think it is.

The booty? Yeah, it is. Is it really? Yeah. Holy crap. There's a really funny video of a dude. It's a black guy and his girl and then a white girl with a fat ass booty walks into the walks into the elevator and he and the dude is

just like this that's funny and his girl's like did you see the one where the they're at the grocery store and they're like the wife understood the assignment and then there's another person trying to pick out like some kind of fruit and her ass is like nice and the wife look goes to the husband she goes it's funny and then uh wait hold on have you seen dude i just i found this i was got like 18 million views or some shit but have you seen dude google this it's a funny video go to youtube um uh walking into kfc until i find a black guy oh Oh, my God. Bro. You're just seeing this?

You've seen it? No, you're just seeing it? Yeah, have you seen it? No, I haven't seen it. Oh, dude, Eric's going to love this kind of shit. There it is, right at the top, right there. Eric's going to love this. Hey, guys, it's Manla Isaac.

And today, I'm going to walk into KFC and stay there until I see a black person. Let's see how long it takes. British? Thank you guys for watching. Make sure to subscribe. How funny is that, dude? How funny is that?

Oh my God. Now do the McDonald's fat person one. Oh my God. This one is great. This one's great too. Bro, what a funny idea. It's so funny because all of, He doesn't... Hey, guys. It's Man Like Isaac.

And today, I'm going to walk into McDonald's and stay there until I see a fat person. Let's see how long... Thank you guys for watching me show up tonight. Dude. He does this for like all different stereotypes. The videos are like 11 seconds long. Hey, guys.

It's Man Like Isaac. And today, I'm going gonna walk into Starbucks and stay there until I see a middle aged white woman. Let's see how long it takes. Thank you guys for watching. Make sure to like, subscribe. I mean, I don't know how many times you can do it, but he's got a bunch of them.

Yeah. Anyway, that's a funny bit, but you can't really monetize those videos very well. They're only 18 seconds. He needs to start a podcast. He needs to start a podcast. He just does that. The 10-second podcast.

Yeah. So I don't know. Yeah, but I don't know. The baby's, you know. Yeah. So then we went to the doctor. So I thought the due date was the 27th. And then they're having a conversation, Rachel and the doctor talking.

They're like, well, you know, in the thing on our computer, the original due date was February 1th. And then they're having a conversation, Rachel and the doctor talking, and they're like, well, you know, and the thing on our computer, the original due date was February 1st. Yeah. Oh. So I'm like, well, what? And where did we get to the 27th? They say, well, it's sometimes when the ultrasound they measure and they think. Oh, don't do that. Don't get my hopes up. What are we talking about now?

Let me tell you something, too. I don't know why they say it's nine months, because it's not. It's ten months. Yeah. It's just straight up not nine months. Yeah. It's just straight up not nine months. Yeah. It's 10 months. Well, it's a completion of a ninth month. Right.

Because they're not counting the nutting. You should go right into the doctor at that point. When did you nut, sir? Yeah, yeah. And when did you nut? But they, yeah, so I'm just ready to just like have her belly just start going like this. You know what I mean? It's like it's so.

But you know what's great, though, is playing with the baby's like foot. It didn't happen yet. What do you mean? No, the baby is fucking kicking. I can see. Oh, I see what you're saying. I know how the baby. That's crazy.

We did an ultrasound of like the baby's like this and this. And then he'll be like doing this. I can see the – Ain't that weird? Yeah, it's so weird. And I just like – imagine like something, an alien is taking over your body. What's weird is it's ready. It's ready now.

It's a baby in there. Yeah, that's crazy, dude. It's ready to go. But, you know, yeah, that's his IQ. That's the baby. Yeah. That baby's in the nutshell. Tars and T's in the nutshell

so i don't know man i just it's just i'm just kind of like come on you know everything's ready and remember how you used to say my i didn't remember when i had a first marriage you were like nah you made it up are you making this up you better have a baby right now rachel You making this shit up? You better have a babysitter. I got pictures of my pregnant Rachel. Is it the fucking makeup book affects people from the clumps came over and did it? Just for her to get that purse. Ha! All right, what else?

Yeah, what do we got? Do we got people? I forgot we were doing this. Fred Durst. What's up, everybody at the Golden Hour? Hey, what's up, Nate? What's up, Chin? What's up, Eric, Chris, Brendan? Hey up eric chris brendan hey i got a

quick submission um not even gonna ask you a question i just suggest you watch this video so there's a video of oj like years ago shot with some reporter they're on a pier i don't know what they're doing it's just a quick clip of some lady some random lady while they're filming something walks up to him so hey i've never shook hands with a murderer before. Bro. And he's like, oh, thanks. I appreciate that. It is wild. But then to top it off, there's some clip at the end where she's like, I've never had – or OJ surprises me with something, right? And it cuts to a scene or something where they're like behind some door somewhere and they open it.

And OJ is there with a knife. So I saw this when it happened on the news. So pause it. I remember seeing this and as a kid, I felt so bad. Did you see this? No. Yeah. I was just like, and I was like, well, I guess he did murder, though, but he got off.

As a kid, I was so confused because I was like, well, he got off, but people think he's a murderer. So he is, but he got off, but he did it. But then this woman did this. I remember feeling so bad and confused when I saw this. Who did you feel bad for? OJ. Oh, wow. Because I was young, and I also How old is this? It was like after,

old, old, old, old, old, old, old, like right after it happened. Oh, okay. And I also think about this all the time. I think about this video all the time, and I haven't seen it since then So it's I can't believe the dude fucking is bringing it back and I can't I haven't even looked for it yet. So go ahead After we finished filming OJ said to me that he had a surprise for me, and I genuinely

was surprised. I think it was his idea of a joke. And this is it. Okay. You gotta be kidding me. Yeah, but at what point did you feel bad for OJ? When she, the first lady the first i know but well here's the deal is that the point that you're like oh because here's the

deal at that i i i think i wasn't sure like he well i don't know okay let me yeah here's the thing he okay let's say yeah hypothetically, he is guilty. Right. He got away with it. He's a psychopath. So that's why you would make that joke. That, yes, the joke part. Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure. Let's say he didn't do it. Right.

He's been going through all this. Yeah. And he got off like, finally, I'm vindicated. And now he's just making light of the situation that he – No, but I didn't see the stabbing thing. Oh. I only saw the first part. You only saw the first part? Yeah.

But it's like, that's like, that girl was original. That's an original Karen. Yeah. That's a Karen before Karen. I don't know, though, but it's like so weird. The OJ thing, because like everyone collectively says he did it, but also he got off. And

we just understand that the justice system is flawed and that he did do it, right? I mean, nobody, does anybody think that he didn't do it? I don't know. No, I think everyone thought he did it, but remember that came off the Rodney King trial. Yes, no, I understand that. That's why they got to like,

that's why I felt like he got off. It was such an interesting thing, man, because what's still going on. I mean, he's still. It was such an interesting thing, man, because – Well, it's still going on. I mean, he's still – he's out here. But you know what I feel? It's like this is the strange thing about the world. So this woman thinks that this guy viciously murdered two people,

and you want to walk up to him and shake his hand and say, I've never shaken my hand with a murderer. You know what he should have done? What? He held onto her hand just a little bit. Oh, yeah. You know what I mean? She tried to walk away. He should have went like, just a second. You know what I mean? Just a second of being like,

I just want to get a good look at your face. And then let her go. Like, freaking balls on this bitch to do that. Gangster, dude. You know what I mean? He should have done that. She would have, like, it would have been like this.

Like, you know? And then I just go. You know what I mean? You just give him a little. Like, wow. Yeah. But that's just that, that's that, like, you know, I don't know. And then he's giving me an interview.

And the lady's like, well, how did that make you feel? He's like, well, you know, you know what's crazy about OJ? What? You know how he paid for all his trial money? Uh-uh. Memorabilia. Yeah, I think I did know that. But a person like that, what would they do now?

They would have to have a podcast from jail or something. No one cares about memorabilia like that right now. Oh, now, yeah. He was literally signing footballs in prison. They were bringing stuff and he had to sign it. That's not a thing that – Have you seen the only – What would you do now?

The only theory that I think has any sort of merit to it is that his son did it. Did you ever see that one? That one makes me feel so interesting because I'm like, well, I would do that for my kids. You know what I'm saying? Like, that is the only thing that makes sense to me. Bring it up.

Oh, that he just... Yeah, like... He took the blame? Or, like, tried to help, you know? Well, I mean, if you look at the civil trial, you know, I mean, I mean if you look at the the the civil trial you know I mean everything they didn't do in the the criminal case in the civil trial they they now they they did have shoot this Jews they did that picture uh-huh you know so I don't know man oh I mean so this is like what does it say oh

these are the conspiracy theories guilty, it was brought to my attention to check out his son, Jason. Here's what I found. Prior to the killings, Jason was diagnosed with intermittent rage disorder. He had stopped taking his medication two months before the murders. He wrote a note in which he talked about killing anyone who hurt a loved one of his. In his past, Jason had nearly killed a girlfriend and seriously injured another. At the time of the murders, he was on probation for attacking his boss with a knife. He has no alibi that can be supported as to where he was during the murders. His time card for work that night was handwritten, even though the electric

clock was working. A black navy watch cap with animal fur on it was found at the crime scene. Photographs obtained from Jason's storage locker show that he wore them often and that he had a dog. In this locker was also a knife that matched the description of what was used for the murders. This is all knife training from the Navy Academy. was used for the murders. When is this all? This was knife training from the Navy Academy. The day after the murders, OJ hired a top criminal attorney to defend Jason, although he wasn't a suspect.

Police never even tested the fingerprints found at the scene or the DNA under Nicole's fingernails against Jason. After hearing all this, what do you guys think? Okay, so let's just say that could be all bullshit. She's the daughter of that girl that was like, how do you? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That could all be bullshit.

I mean, who knows? But when I first heard that, I was like, if all this shit is true, that's crazy. Well, I mean, it's just crazy even if he killed them and then he's just walking around. That's already crazy. Who? OJ? Yeah. Oh, all of it.

Yeah. No matter what happens, it's crazy. But imagine, what does that make you feel? Like, okay, so let's say this is that. Yeah. It's a true thing. Yeah. And then somehow they, you know.

It's a really weird mix of feelings because I feel as a dad, I'm like, wow, OJ did what he had to do. That's, I mean, I would do that. You know what I mean? Like, my son's not going to – that's me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know? But here's my question, though.

What? If that guy is diagnosed with all this stuff, what's going on with him now? You would think you would have heard this before. I've never heard anything ever about OJ's son. Right? Oh, really? Yeah. Have any of you ever heard – I've never heard anything.

So I'm letting you guys know about this. Yeah. That's the first time I've ever heard about that. So what's going on with him now? Well, he's in St. Petersburg, Florida and he has a private life

away from the glaring eyes of the media and he concentrates on his real estate career and rarely makes any features in the media and stabs a bunch of people every now and then.

Men he's doing a showing. Four bedroom. You love it? So good? Yeah. Do you check proof of funds? Oh, you don't have it. I don't know.

So he's not really angry? No. Like that's crazy what you just did. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He has rage issues. I don't think he would be so better. Yeah, but it's been years and now he's comfortable with it. He's a real estate agent.

It's pretty wild though. You know, it's kind of – look. In the slogan should be – killing should be in the slogan. Oh, my God. Real estate, you know. Come to OJ Real Estate. We'll slash prices. But OJ would do that.

OJ should be like one of those Cal Worthington. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Go see OJ. Go see my son of those Cal Worthington. You know what I mean? Yeah. Go see O.J. Go see my son. Does O.J. make money now? Does he have money? What does he do?

Oh, his pension from the NFL. Wow. Wow. Which is a pretty good sum of money. I believe it's something like $250,000 a year or something like that. $420,000. Wow. You can live great off that.

$400,000? Yeah. Damn. Well, he's probably still got residuals from things. I guess they're not. I guess they still play stuff, right? What can you do? I mean, he's like, he should just, I mean, check it out.

If he started a podcast, I mean, this is already fascinating that he's on social media. Just pick a video and listen to it. Dude, I met Sammy the Bull Gravano the other day, and he's on social media all over the place. You know who that is? The underboss of the fucking... He was on Fighter and the Kid. No, no, I know.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because I was at Brian's show, and fucking Sammy the Bull was there. Brian's always hanging out with, like, you know, the craziest motherfuckers. And I met him, and it out with like, you know, the craziest motherfuckers. And I met him and it was just like, dude, this guy admitted to killing 19 people and served time for it. And now he's just out? And now he's just out.

Well, I mean. And it's like, and he's got a podcast and a book. Well, then prison works. Well, no. Yeah, I understand. Right. It's supposed to be. Yeah.

Guy's been rehabilitated. He served his time for his crime. And now he's out here in the streets just being like, you know. But the family's work. He was very nice, too. Yeah. Super sweet. Yeah.

Charming. But knowing he killed them, it was so weird. Very charming. It is weird because he made a deal and he basically took organized crime down. Like some people say he was the most important. He took it down, right, by being an informant because the other people were – Gotti was going against him and he was like, well, fuck that. Then I'm exposing everyone.

And so he took them all down and he – what was I going to say? Does he fear for his life at all he seems chill but my whole thing is like why is he not dead that's what i'm just asking he just lives in arizona yeah he's just there and nobody he just doesn't i think because he's such such a huge figure now like if you kill him you're going to get caught for sure i guess but that mafia doesn't give a fuck yeah but there is no mom that didn't stop him from killing epstein right yeah but it's pretty crazy so he got five years for 19 killing oh my god but he also it was a plea deal exactly of course yeah who all did he take down but my point was everyone in the look he killed people in the game he never killed innocent people he killed the people in the mafia which is okay

look live by the sword die by the sword okay live by the sword, okay? Live by the gun, die by the gun. But, like, you, you know, the families of those people are probably like, well, what the fuck? But here's the thing, though. If you're part of the mafia, you're going to get got. That's part of your shit. Like, this dude killed his brother-in-law and shit or whatever, you know? I know, but what I'm saying is, isn't the mafia have a thing about, like, you know, even in movies they talk about not snitching.

Yeah, lo cosa nostra. Yeah, so it's like. But, well, yes. Who are you nowing. Yeah. Lo cosa nostra. Yeah. So it's like. But. But. Well, yes. Who are you now? This guy. Well, hey. Hey.

Hey. Yay. On the arm, right? But. But. No. But so. You're secretly a hit man this whole time.

It's fucking crazy, though. Because then, after that, he got out. And then he got 18 years for an ecstasy. Oh, so he did some. An ecstasy ring. Yeah, in 99. That's what got him? I don't know so much about this. Yeah, that's what got him.

No, but that's a lot. So 19 killings, five years, some party drugs. But once they did that, they were like, all right, we got him. Because they wanted, obviously, to put him away for more. It's like the DAs try to get you for later of stuff they can't prove, like when they send OJ to prison just for stealing his memorabilia back it's like retroactive punishment yeah it's like it was like when they gave um uh denzel washington the oscar for training day not hurricane yeah they should have gave it to him for hurricane no they should have given it to him for

malcolm max well okay but that was years later i I'm talking about he did Hurricane, didn't get it. The next year he did Training Day. They gave it to him for Training Day. He deserved it for Hurricane, and everyone knows it. And everyone knew it back then. Well, it's just like Pacino. They gave him for Scent of a Woman. That's when Denzel should have won.

Oh, was that the same year? Yeah. Dude, Pacino should have won already, though. But he didn't. I know. Godfather? Well, yes, but also the— There's so many better actors than Godfather.

No, but what's the one with the— God damn it. Chris Christopherson is in it. Where he tries to rob the bank. Oh, you're talking about Heat? No, no, no. Dog Day Afternoon? Yes, Dog Day Afternoon.

He should have won for that. Heat is one of the top five best movies I've ever seen in my life. What? Yeah. Have you seen it? Yeah. When? I love Heat.

Top five best movies I've ever seen in my life. Bro, that shit is an opera. I know. That shit is. My favorite scene in Heat, though. my favorite, favorite scene in Heat, De Niro is scot-free. He's like, he won. And he's on the freeway. He's going to, he could get away.

Yeah. But he's like, I got to go kill this dude. He can't do it. He's addicted to the life. He was like, I got to go kill this guy. He's addicted to the life. You know? gotta go kill this guy He's addicted to the life You know It's like when a

Hey I just saw Heat Hey I just saw Heat Sorry that was Was that Pete Davidson? That was Jim Gaffigan He In his first Comedy Central Presents He had a bit about

Seeing movies like Eight years after they come out And it's hard They're hard to talk about He's like Hey I just saw Heat Wow Jim Gaffigan has looked

Terrible for years Do you know him? about he's like hey just saw he Jim Gaffigan has looked terrible for you do you know him yeah I mean God better now right he looks better now he looks so much better now like as you find your there he looks 47 right there right you know he was 23 right there. Jim, God damn. You know what it is? It's money and age, man. Bro, six more months of me working out, you're going to be like, God damn, Griffin.

Bro, just look. Let me. Look, he's a friend of mine. Joe Coy had a glow up. Joe Coy had a glow. You make money, you start looking good, dude. Yeah. Joe Coy, 15 years ago when i was opening for him he looked like the toxic crusader i swear to god look

we all looked bad back then though now look at him he He's fucking handsome. Well, but you know what I mean? Got his teeth done. I think, at least. You did, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I used to do his podcast, Koi Pond, at Corolla. Oh, really? They were $60,000.

And I was always like, if I have that money spent, I'm getting perfect teeth. Wow. $60,000. It was some guy at Beverly Hills. So what is it? You go in. What do they do? Well, they take teeth from a Taiwanese kid. No, no, no.

And then grow them in a fish. They file them down to like that, which is crazy. That part I know. Vampire teeth. And then they put on caps. Veneers. Yeah, veneers. That's wild.

We've actually got a guy with a submission who has respectfully. He's got veneers. Okay, let's see. I want to get them. Even though I don't need them, I just want to get them. I want to have teeth like the mask. Like just straight up hardcore. So stupid.

It's kind of hot when chicks have those big ass veneers. I'm a weirdo. Yeah, you are a weirdo. You want to look like please somebody photoshop those teeth onto chris uh-huh i'm into it there's probably a filter that you could do that oh definitely who's the guy with the veneers you're talking about yeah he's getting my bread he he i'll have him in a sec oh there he did a submission or something yeah thousand dollars that's a lot of money but but you that's of money. But that's a big thing for...

Oh, this is like you don't really look good if you have bad teeth. It's kind of Adam Carolla-ish, right? And then you see the bottom area. Oh. Ha! Oh, Denau. What's up, baby? It's Ram from Santa Clarita Valley.

I have a quick question for you guys. I am married. We're going on four years now. And when you're in a marriage, you know, there's little things that I feel you can do to just have smooth sailing there. And one thing that me and my wife both swear by now that I have to get your opinions are not separate beds, but separate blankets. We each have our own blanket. So in the middle of the night, but separate blankets. We each have our own blanket.

So in the middle of the night, no one's rolling, taking a little bit. Dude, honestly, it feels like no one's there sometimes and it's fucking amazing and I can never go back. But I don't know.

Have you guys tried it? I mean, do you guys roll separate blankets now? Do you guys have the, you know, the one big blanket and you got everybody and the kids under there

all sharing or how you guys doing, man? Because for me, bro, never again am I sharing a blanket. That's suckers, man. But anyways,

have a great day, guys. Talk to you soon. What a nice guy. I have two separate blankets. Oh, wow, dude. I sleep on top of the blankets. I don't give a fuck. I make it hot

and I sleep on top of the blankets. Ugh. That makes sense. I love it. I love being too hot, bro. I love being too hot. The plane on the way back from Phoenix was so hot and Kristen's like, it's hot, huh? And I'm like, yeah, it. I love being too hot. The plane on the way back from Phoenix was so hot.

And Kristen's like, it's hot, huh? And I'm like, yeah, it is hot. And she goes, oh, man, what the heck? That's so crazy. And she looked away and I go like this. I was secretly happy. But it was hot. No, we had the AC blasting and I have two blankets.

Nah, bro, that's crazy. And we have one of those Tempur-Pedic ones now. So it's almost like separate. So I have my own sheet, my own blanket. Chill, bro. What? Chill. Don't have all that.

Yeah, you have to have all that. Sell it. No, we can't. Do it. Sell it on open market, blankets for sale on the open market? No, I have to have my own blanket. I don't know how you do that. I never thought of that.

That's a good idea, but I'm not doing that. Yeah, but Rachel's a monster. I know, I have to have my own blanket. I don't know how you do that. I never thought of that. That's a good idea, but I'm not doing that. Yeah, but Rachel's a monster. I know, I know. She'll have the whole, you know. Dude, Kristen, I, man, she plays fucking, she'll play Pokemon on her phone when she's going to bed. You know, trying to catch she's, you know, trying to catch the thing.

I know, in a bed, right? And, and I'm like, it's okay. It doesn't bother me. It really doesn't. It's actually kind of nice,

you know, but I'm like, she'll do it and, and, and then do a crossword and then she'll like fall asleep doing it. I'm like,

man, I can't imagine being on your phone falling asleep. Like that seems like I'd be wired. I have to send a video of me. I do that all the time. I have my iPad on my chest. And then I'll just be snoring.

Really? Yeah. Then the iPad will hit me. What are you doing on the iPad? I'll be watching. Just surfing? Oh, watching. Yeah, because she watches the TV.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And you know, while she's playing on TikTok or whatever. So, and then. Lakudo. And then I'll wake up. She'll wake up. She'll wake up. I'll wake up. And she'll be already on her phone.

Waking up on your phone. Going to sleep on the phone. Wake up on the phone. Now, let me just say this. Kristen is not addicted to her phone. She's not on her phone a lot. She actually loses it a lot. She loses it for hours.

She's cool not being on the phone. But when she's on the phone, it's on the phone. And she does it every night before sleep. And I can't. That's got to be bad for your fucking sleep. Yeah. It is. There's studies about it.

It's crazy. But this is when I watch my shows is right before I go to bed. I'll catch up on my show. Then I'll fall asleep and I'll be like, all right, that's it. Boom, close it. Boom, go to sleep. But then I see her and I show her back to me. Yeah.

I see a campfire on the other side of her. to sleep you know but then but then i see her like she'll have her back to me yeah i see like a light like a campfire on the other side of her yeah yeah like she's getting abducted it's annoying bro because i'm remember when you used to cuddle and shit i don't do that like she's so far over i'm like all right fuck it you know oh you know what i found out is the move for me bro i if i can't sleep oh man i just grab a pillow and i hold it and i'm out dude um i am out bro get yourself a teddy bear or something then i could and i should do it but the pillow works fine like a light like. Like a light. I'm out, dude. And if I can't... Dude, fail safe?

Splurting. If I masturbate? Dude. It is... Do you just do it in the bed with her right there? You already know the answer to that. So it's like this. So Chris is like this.

She's on the thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And all of a sudden, the bed starts moving even more. Yeah. No, I just put my hand on my penis. I don't even have to move it. It's manual. She does it for me.

Babe, play. Turn on Pokemon? Turn on Pokemon. Oh, hell yeah. Dude, but no. Faster, faster. That's the fail safe though, dude. That's the fail safe.

That's the ripcord. Dude, if I just, if I do that. Oh my God. I like heavy things on me. Yeah. Yeah. Well, that's what I kind of like about the pillow. It's not heavy, but you hold it.

If I say, where'd you put your leg? She puts her leg. I saw this article, one of those like, a doctor type things, and it says when you're really close to someone, and if you fall asleep, that's when you're bonding. You bond because of whatever, the serotonin or whatever, and if you fall asleep when you're with someone you're really close to, it's because you're bonding with them. So I say that to Rachel all the time.

She's talking about something, and I'll be like, babe, I'm going to bond. But it's like, that's what happens. When she gets really close to me, if I take her leg and put her leg on me, once I feel that, then I'm just, I'm gone. Bro, I used to, with my ex, we used to fall asleep like two or three different times. We dreamt the same

dreams and that was crazy. She was lying to you. One of my exes. Yeah, but I think She's fucking lying to you. No, I know, but I think one time I was the one

I was like, what the fuck? No. But yeah, chicks lie, right? Yeah, your chick was doing Ouija board with you. You're probably right.

Say hello. You're probably right. Yes, there's someone here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, she was moving it and you were like this, bro.

Wow, she buy you a fucking Birkin? Yeah. I wish you could contact her and be like, were you about the dreams and she's like yeah i just i could contact her we're still on good terms i just wanted to be as supportive um you think you can connect more just by touching but you can't share share some thoughts i think that's that's real well yeah no i'm not saying it's not he is oh oh oh god that's not real i'm not i'm not saying it's no way no way you have the same dreams no way that's real i love how hardcore you are about it i'll tell you that i'm telling you right now there's no then magic's real okay all right then reading minds is real

telekinesis is real i want your phone right now yeah your girl was going like this. Bro, how many times? You closed your eyes as she threw it to you. What the heck? How many times in your life have you genuinely thought, like, God, I wish so bad that it was real that I could fucking move objects? So many times, bro. I don't want to get up. Don't even get. And I get sad.

I get sad for this. I've done this numerous times. I'll just be like this. You try. Yeah, me too. Same. It never works, huh? It never works.

I just – sometimes you think just move a little bit. Please. Yeah, I just – I go like this. I go like this. Please. But I do this – Give me a sign, Lord. No, but I do this thing that pretend – like if – let's say you could shoot fire from your hands.

Yep. All right? I'm in. All right? So there's a thing that you would do. I want to do it. So I tell myself, this is how I would activate that power. And I go, you know, and I could feel like the fire would come out right now if I did this.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're a kid. You know? You're a kid. So sometimes when I'm like, so I think like, oh, I can feel something. Like I go, oh. So then I'll go on Rachel's head. I'll be like, Rachel, tell me if you feel something. I go, yeah so then i'll go on rachel's head yeah i'll be like wait tell me if you feel something i go yeah there she goes i felt something oh wow she's such a chick

dude but that's what i know i so i wish that would i mean i know and i i genuinely yearn for that yeah dude i i feel you dude you. I thought you might, bro. Yeah, and sometimes, say, Rachel does something and she walks away from me. Oh, I've done this, too. I'll be like. What if she was walking away and she just goes. I pissed. Wouldn't it be great if you could just make your wife shit or pants?

Or what if she says... I like how that's where he's thinking. Or go into labor. Maybe use it for good. Yeah, use it for good, bro. Magneto. I've already tried it. Shit.

What about the baby? No, I want you to shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What if you walked away? What if she walked away from you and she goes, ow? And then she heard, yes. Wait, wait, wait, yeah. What if she walked away from you and she goes, ow? And then she heard, yes. Wait, wait, wait, wait.

Of course you would say yes. If you're trying to use powers and it finally worked, you'd be like, oh, my God. I know. It's just funny to think you're happy that she said, babe. Babe, stay right there. See if you feel this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm going to try to, I don't know.

Your neck still hurt? Yeah, but dreams, no one shares dreams. I'm sorry. Babe, does your neck hurt right now? No. God damn it. It doesn't work anymore.

Can you use it for good? You just downstairs going like this? Fuck! You hear, I pissed! What's this? The most commonly reported type of mutual dream is known as a meshing dream.

Two people's different dreams which share certain elements. You and your partner have been both watching an episode of Love Island. Sure, yeah. This, it's a fucking weird example, Love Island. And then both of you dream about being stranded together on an island. Yeah. I mean, okay, cool. I had some crazy dreams last night.

Man, do you remember your dreams? I remember them for a second. Because I remember yours. I wake up, I eric i gotta talk to eric about that no but you're uh yeah i mean sometimes but it's weird that you remember them how about when you wake up and you go oh fuck i gotta remember that dream hey you start do come on me don't forget that one yeah gone you go back you wake back up oh how about this sometimes i'll have a dream well you know you wake up and there's a moment where you're like oh that wasn't real yeah oh oh i hate it oh have you ever because because like sometimes you're just like

i used to i sometimes i feel like we or have you ever woken up yeah in the dream at a moment where like oh something was about to happen or and i feel like sometimes i feel like like that's happening on purpose like this is like that's an alternate universe we're in and i've had waking up because yeah we don't we'll stay there forever i had two dreams you've had wet dreams right like obviously not recently but like when you were a kid um i had one when i was uh a kid with molly ringwald oh my god i had a wet dream man it was dope fuck off and then um and then i had just woke up yeah yeah yeah and then i had one when I was a little older, and I kissed. I was in an elevator with Beyonce, and we, like, kissed for a while,

and I was super hard. And I woke up, and I'm counting that. Like, I kissed Beyonce. I hooked up with her. I counted. And then I had another one where my, this is not a wet dream. It was a horror dream. But where my dad died in a plane explosion and I woke up and burst into tears, dude.

Like burst into tears. I was so happy it wasn't real. Like I woke up and I go, oh, like it must've looked so crazy. I dated someone. She had a condition that she had to take medication because Night terrors. The dreams would,

she would be hallucinating. Like, like, like awake. And there'd be like a monster right here i don't know what that was called i got sweetie wake up we have to break up wake up i want to that's called schizophrenia yeah yeah no dude how about did i tell you that i didn't tell you this i told this story on congratulations a few weeks ago but calvin it was the night kristin was um away she was away for that

fucking game the the the football game she went to whatever the cotton ball or whatever the fuck it is and um so anti-sports the toilet bowl and so it was just me and calvin you know and uh i put him to bed in his bed i went to bed in my bed and then he woke up came to my bed and was like crying and i was like you're right buddy and he he does this thing when i can't wait for you to experience shit like this but like he does this thing when like he wakes up in his bad dream he'll wake up and i'll be like, you're right, buddy. And I'll go like this. I'll go, ah, and just start like, like, I'm like, it's like he's acting, but I think it's, I don't think he's acting. I think he just doesn't really understand. Like you can, you can wean out your emotions a little bit, but he's just like, it's overwhelming.

Ah, like I'll just do that. Right. And I'm like, buddy, it's okay. What happened? You know, I had a bad dream. So he had a bad dream. I put him back, I put him back to sleep and and and he kept waking up and and and there was one time where he woke up he just i was in bed he was next to me and he just sat up and i felt it like because i was like on alert

because he was like kept waking up and he was looking around in the room and i'm like, buddy, what are you doing? And he says, who's that guy? Bro, hey. I'm like, we just need a scene from a horror movie. Everybody just went, oh, shit. Bro, I go, huh. Like, just stunningly scared. You know what I mean? But you know what?

Good. Because you don't want a situation where there is a guy and you're selling your kid. True. There's no guy. Okay. So scared, but also let's see if this is real. Is there a guy in the house? Yes.

Okay. So did you go like this? No, no, no. So I look. I don't have my glasses on? Yes. Okay. So did you go like this? No, no, no. So I look. I don't have my glasses on, but I can see enough, you know. And I say, where? He points

to a specific area. There's no one. You might be like, good. No guy. No. Me? More scared. Yeah. More scared. you might be like good no guy no me more scared yeah okay more scared more scared so i say yeah calvin i don't see anyone and he says yeah there's three all right i go in my head i say all right chris you're real fucking scared you can't act scared because your son is three and he needs to

know the truth about what's going on he's having a dream he's having some sort of a weird thing so don't be scared. And I legit, I'm talking to myself, I'm like, come on, motherfucker, bro. Do not get scared. Because I could totally see myself

turn on the lights and be like, all right, well, this is what TV, and then he senses that, and then he's a pussy in his life when he grows up because of this. Dude, I swallowed that shit hard. I actually made peace with it.

I was like, if there's a ghost here and he possesses both of us And tears us up At least I wasn't scared Like that This was all the shit I was thinking of

And then Two minutes later You went Yeah I was fucking Scared bro So Calvin is Damien Bro

And then And then we woke up In the morning And he was like And we were talking about it He's like Remember I was scared Of that guy And I he was like, and we were talking about it. He's like, remember, I was scared of that guy. And I was just like, let's just not talk about it. Mommy's coming home later.

Then what did he say? What did you say to him? The thing is, when you have a three-, four-year-old, and you'll see this, it's like you never really know what they're saying. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like they wake up, and you're like, did you have a nightmare? And they're like, yeah. And you're like, did you? You know what I'm saying yeah it's like it's like you you know they wake up and like did you have a nightmare and they're like yeah and you're like did you you know what i'm saying like they just say stuff yeah they don't even know because i think that's around the age where they're they're learning that

their behavior gets a reaction out of you and so it's like oh bro you know so i get i get i can understand you know i i there was a thing where maybe Maybe Calvin just knew that you had a little bitch in you And he was like It's funny bro There's a guy over there And you were like no there isn't It's funny because the other day He was with the nanny

And she was like Well we can't do that And he was like no but I want to And I walk over there and I sayvin and he looks at me and i go just like that and he goes like this and it was like the first time no words were said but i was like and he knew the reaction he was like i better stop it's it's wild to see this kind of shit dude as they become a person yeah hey calvin and i because i was gonna say you don't fucking do that right but but i didn't have It's wild to see this kind of shit, dude, as they become a person. Yeah. You go, hey, Calvin. Because I was going to say, you don't fucking do that, right?

But I didn't have to, dude. It's wild, bro. You didn't pick them up like this? Yeah. I remember when I used to work with kids. We were at a school. And then it was like this first grader. They were first graders.

And they were like acting up. You know what I mean? And I went over to the person that was acting up. And I picked the whole desk up. You know what I mean? And I went over to the person that was acting up and I picked the whole desk up. Wow. The whole desk up with the kid in it and I just pulled it up

eye level. It was like, don't do that. You know? But I did it because the rest of the kids were like this.

That's hilarious. You know what I mean? But they were great. What was great about it would be like, it would be great if you pulled your back then. I know, right? But what's great about it is when they would great about it would be like – It would be great if you pulled your back then. I know, right?

No, but what's great about it is like they – when they would see you, they would be like, ah, Coach Eric. Yeah, yeah. They would run. You're a cool dude, yeah. Yeah, then you'd be like, oh, that's what you need. And some of my kids are so resilient, man, about like –

Oh, dude. They get in trouble. They get in trouble. Even if you have to be like, don't do that. I remember this. I'll never forget this little girl. She was doing something bad. I said, you got to stop doing that.

Then she went like this. I'm sorry. Aw. You know? And I was like. I know. I know. I know.

I said to myself, uh-oh. I better not ever have a little girl because. I know. As a man, too. You're going to be spoiled. Your voice is lowered. Oh, I know. You know what I mean?

Oh, bro. Because I was like, oh, yeah. I was like, you didn't do. I thought to myself, I have to be a disciplinarian right now. And I don't want to. Yeah. This little girl is so adorable. Dude. You know? That's funny. Yo. So Calvin you didn't do it. I thought to myself, I have to be a disciplinarian right now, and I don't want to. This little girl is so adorable. Dude.

That's funny. Yo, so Calvin. Teach only ugly kids. That's what you should do. You're talking about resilience? So Calvin, about a year ago, eight months ago, fell down, hit his mouth, and he was fine. He cried. It bled a little bit, honestly.

And his tooth died. It's like gray now okay not a big deal because he'll lose it and right and it'll get regular teeth but it's a little gray one of his teeth in the front and uh the dentist was like oh yeah that happens when they hit their face sometimes it'll go back it'll turn back white or whatever and it's like all right cool it hasn't yet but bro calvin is at the point where like kristen will just give him her phone and he'll like start to video and he's videoing himself dude we fuck man this is funny as shit bro we're looking through kristen's phone at the videos he took right he's in the bed just like at the videos he took. Right.

He's in the bed just like looking at himself. He's going like this. Just making faces. Look at that. It's true. No, he goes like this. He goes like this.

And we see his face and he goes, I have a Doty 2. Bro. He found it. And we have that on video bro i have a dirty tooth and then the video stops dude you just show him that later i can't it was so do you understand how funny that shit was to see oh my god so funny and we're like well buddy

it's not really dirty it's just you hit it and funny, bro. And then you have to go into some grandiose explanation. I know. You don't know shit what I'm saying. Right, right, right. You just kind of go. It's better just to say, the guy in the corner painted your tooth. That was you, the guy. Remember the guy that came in the middle of the night?

Remember the guy? He gave you that tooth. That tooth. That would make more sense to him. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's why the guy was there. The tooth guy. Oh, is that it?

That's it. All right, cool. I got nothing because I'm waiting for a baby. El Paso, I'll be there. And Albuquerque, I'll be there. And I'm sure Brendan's got some dates that he'll be doing after things are better. Keep them in your thoughts and prayers. And Brandon, we're thinking about you.

And thanks for watching, guys. Well, now that you did that, I can't promote my other dates. Which are where? Well, they happen to be in Kelowna, B.C. and Vancouver, B.C. and Rochester and Kitchener. But we shouldn't talk about it. We already said. I already ended the pocket.

It's done. What you're doing right now is like end credits for a Marvel movie right now. What you're doing right now. All right. Cool. It's done. So what you're doing right now, it's like end credits for a Marvel movie right now, what you're doing right now. All right, cool. Thanks, guys. Thank you.