The Golden Hour - Snitching on Everybody | The Golden Hour PATREON #32 EXCERPT w/ Brendan Schaub, Erik Griffin & Chris D'Elia

Episode Date: March 6, 2024

Chris gets crazy buzzed off Nyquil, the guys give advice to a pool cleaner, a USPS worker and guy that was in a coma, and talk Google's new Gemini AI, vitamins, Robin Black getting harassed by a fan, Chick-fil-A vs KFC, being a stay at home dad and much more! Get the full episode plus two extra episodes every month at https://patreon.com/thegoldenhourpodcast

We're friends that laugh, we're friends that shout Sometimes we don't know what we're talking about But that won't stop us Nothing can stop us Cause I can show you used to love Just rebranded enough It's stronger, better, bigger power Cause it is the Golden Hour

It's the Golden Hour Dude, let me just tell you something. I know we did the regular version right before this. And I said it at the end. Dude, I'm dizzy. Do you ever wake up and you're just fucking dizzy? No. Great. Did you not? What and you're just fucking dizzy? No. Great.

Did you not? What did you do the night before? What did you eat? Nothing. Did you work out? What did you do? You have to retrace your steps. And then it's probably something you haven't normally done.

Or did you eat dinner? What did you have for dinner? Did you not eat? You know what I mean? So that's probably what it is. No, I did everything I normally do. You sure? Yeah.

Because you're, listen. I went to bed a little earlier. Maybe it's that. Oh, you got, your brain is just like so rested. But I still woke up early. I woke up earlier too, though. It should be fine. Maybe it's just, sometimes you just have one of those days for me at least.

Did you eat breakfast this morning? No. There it is. But I don't do that. Your body is doing that, though. You're always telling me shit. Because you're not 31, bro. I it is. But I don't do that. Your body is not doing that, though. You're always telling me shit. Because you're not 31, bro. I'm 41.

When you're 31, you don't have to do shit. I'm going to be 44. And your body's like, okay. Okay. Just wait. And now you're at an age now where you have to have breakfast, okay? Have a bagel. Have a smoothie.

I'm going to tell you right now, dude. I think breakfast is a sham. Oh, my God. I think it's a conspiracy. It's not a conspiracy. I don't think you need breakfast now, dude. I think breakfast is a sham. Oh, my God. I think it's a conspiracy. It's not a conspiracy. I don't think you need breakfast. Kellogg. Mr. Kellogg really fucked us, man.

Oh, my God. Here we go. Because you wanted to make money. I am vibing. But you wanted to make money, though. Forget about it. You don't have to eat that thing. I'm just saying have something.

I don't eat until I'm almost done. That's probably what it is. I bet you. Do you take vitamins in the morning? Oh, fuck, dude. I shouldn't have brought this up. No, it's too late. It's too late now. God damn it. Do you take vitamins in the morning? Oh, fuck, dude. I shouldn't have brought this up. Yeah, no, it's too late. It's too late now.

God damn, Eric. Do you take vitamins at all? I don't take vitamins. Okay, you probably. I bet you if you go to like one of those places, get a blood test, and they're going to show you that you're probably deficient in vitamin D, B12, for sure. That's why you're skinny. That's why you look like a fucking vampire.

Look it up. Nick, look up how many people are deficient in vitamin D. You'll see. Eric, dude. Just look it up. Look it up. Nick, look up how many people are deficient in vitamin D. You'll see. Eric. Just look it up. Look it up, Nick. Eric. No.

You need to take care of yourself. You have two children. Wow. All right? You're pale. I know. I'm pale. 50% of the population.

That's crazy. Has vitamin D insufficiency. 30% of adults in the United States have it. Okay? Eric. Look up the benefits of vitamin D. Let's go. You're not even. population that's crazy as vitamin d insufficiency 30 of adults united states have okay eric look up the benefits of vitamin d let's go you're not even look at the benefits of vitamin d all right look it says not dizzy yeah yeah tan skin hair nails nose won't be too big vitamin d is uh benefits of vitamin D What are the benefits? Helps regulate the amount of calcium

That's foreign to me What's the benefit to it? Dude And you work out It's going to help you with your workout I kill it at the gym I do kill it Bone pain caused by kidney

Okay Alright come on I got to take some vitamin D You do Should I snort it? Yeah you can I'll snort it I'll get some vitamin D

Oh you know what You're making jokes You're being funny and all No no no This is a real thing I'm not saying I'm not going to take vitamin D. But you don't take enough B12 either.

I know it. Dude, all right. How many vitamins are you taking, motherfucker? Yeah, when you get to my age, I'm like a Hogwarts potion master before I go to bed. Okay. So hold on. I got my turmeric. I got my ashwagandha.

Jesus Christ. Didn't they film Black Panther there? All the shit in this. I got to do all. I'm just telling you, dude. Most people do not realize. So you take the turmeric and the Wakanda and then you forever.

And you live forever. I do that before I take it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Ashwagandha forever. Anyway, dude, I'm telling you, I went because you know you're talking about testosterone. I did bioethical hormone treatment for a little while. And man, first of all, I didn't realize my testosterone was so low at the time.

And I was like, what? You're supposed to be at a certain number and my shit was real low. I was deficient in vitamin D, B12, cholesterol was high, virginal and diabetes type of stuff. And then after I took that blood test And they said Well this is what you need to do To combat this It's preventative medicine Yeah I understand

So then you started doing The vitamins Yeah And so you take them In the morning Yeah I take them in the morning And how many How many vitamins

Are there roughly Not a lot I take a multivitamin But I also have like Vitamin D drops And B12 drops Okay And I take those

And then where do you get The vitamins Different places I'll go to Air One Okay Or you know That kind of thing Cool And I'll go to Air One or that kind of thing. And I take magnesium at night. All that shit helps.

I used to take magnesium. It didn't really feel like I did anything. It doesn't. Oh, dude, I know why I'm dizzy. I know why I'm dizzy, dude. What? You farted in the car? No, dude.

I took fucking NyQuil. Yes, I figured it out, dude. That's why. All of this we're talking about. I forgot, dude. I said, did you do anything differently you know i forgot didn't i say did i ask you did i ask you did you do anything but i have an excuse that's a good excuse okay yeah i forgot because i took nyquil and i'm busy and

when you're 43 you can't just be taking nyquil because you don't drink i do be taking it dude i did be taking it man i took and i filled it up dude that little cup i filled that little cup up you up You did it like you were at a bar You went like this Can I get a NyQuil And you know what I usually take Only like a half a NyQuil if I'm going to take it Oh no you went for it

Have you seen that new one they have Called Z-Quil It's like what is that That's just NyQuil, right? It's just NyQuil, right? Like, what are we doing, right? It's the same thing. Well, the whole thing is-

Just repackaging. Well, they say that- Well, Z-Quil is to help you sleep. NyQuil is supposed to help your cold while you sleep and sleep. So Z-Quil is just without the cold medicine, I guess? Yeah, whatever. And then didn't it come out that all that shit is fake? Yeah, it's all fake anyway, but you should know that anyway. while you sleep and sleep so zequal is just without the cold medicine i guess yeah whatever and then you it didn't come out that all that is fake yeah it's all fake anyway but you should know that anyway so so so basically what it is is nyquil is just zeke will really yeah yeah

yeah yeah it's always been zeke well i will tell you though when i'm when i am you need to take some vitamin d and i guarantee you're going to feel all right all right but i will or just go out in the sun no it's not enough but for. But for so long, though, you got to go out for so long. That's what people think. If that was enough, then 50% of the fucking population wouldn't be vitamin D deficient. It'd be a start for him, I feel like. It would be a start. It would be a start.

I'm in a podcast room a lot. But also the UV rays got to be, like, you can't do it now. You got to go fucking, you know. And I got to be in fucking cold places and shit. Like, you can't go out and get sun in fucking Rochester and shit. Maybe you can get some sun in Shreveport, Louisiana. Shreveport, Louisiana. I'll be there. Here we go.

Coming up here at Corpus Christi. Dude, I can't wait to play the Texas, man. I love Texas. Atlanta. I'm gonna be in Atlanta at the Funny Bones. It's a Patreon. There's not enough people watching. Who is it? I don't know. I mean, no, we actually have a good subscriber, but, and you know what They're the people who pay

So they would come see you So yeah go ahead Go ahead Go ahead Oh I got life reps also So forget it Yeah Atlanta Atlanta

May 15th Gonna be What is it What are you doing The punchline What was the one that closed down In Atlanta Oh

Was that the Laughing Skull? Did that close down? I think it did. I don't know. I'm surprised Atlanta... Oh, dude, have you heard about this? Atlanta's getting a lot of heat in the hip-hop community. Have you heard about this?

Why? Because they're saying that snitches are from Atlanta. It's so funny, bro. The snitch capital of the world? Yeah, that's what they're saying. It's the snitch capital of the world. What? Like who?

Look it up. Look it up. Give me an example of a snitch from Atlanta. Academics said it. Academics, the DJ said it. Atlanta rapper Gunna addresses snitch allegations in New York. Oh, I guess he snitched on some peoples. So he addresses the snitch allegations?

Dude, Gunna. First of all, can I just... If you're a rapper... Can I say something? Wait, let me make this point. If you're a rapper and you're making money with a, with a, wait, we come to me at this point. If you're a rapper and you're making a money from a record deal, you're not. No.

From the streets. No, no, no. I agree. So you're snitching because you live in a really nice place now. I agree. And you're,

and you have shit to worry about. I agree. Like, like that's all fake persona. Look at this. Look at this. Look at this Instagram at this look at this instagram account atlanta snitches oh this is great i gotta follow this that's so funny i

gotta follow this yeah gangsta snitch this is my kind of thing too i love it i would but let me tell you something too i'm gonna tell you right now bro i'm a snitch if i get caught in a fucking gun battle or something or i money money laundering a RICO charge, bro, I'm snitching on everybody. Bro, listen, I'm always about, I'm calling the authorities. Yeah, bro, you're Karen. You know what I'm saying? Fuck a snitch.

I'm Karen. People that come at me like, hey, I have more to lose than you. Yeah, yeah. I'm calling the authorities. You're going to jail. That's funny, bro. But so Atlanta is the snitch capital, I guess. That doesn't even make sense.

It does kind of, but that is crazy, bro. Atlanta's crazy. You know what? Atlanta's crazy because it's the only city. And this isn't bro this is I don't know how this sounds but Atlanta's the only city where you realize

how many black people are there. It's not You're so fucking stupid. It's not that there's more black people there so you fly to Atlanta you look around and go god damn

they're hard yeah they're just they're wearing everything and dude I just stepped into the most racist combo they're just

they're wearing everything they're just they're wearing everything I'm not gonna drink water I can't drink water. When Chris is on some racist shit, we're done. I mean, there's black people in New York. Not like Atlanta.

They're everywhere. But in Atlanta, you really notice them. Yeah, it's like Wakanda forever. It's just crazy, bro. I love it. Yeah, but I feel the same way. And I love it. But is there a city where you realize the white people are there yes where where where okay Utah anywhere you go like if you go to like

Montana yeah okay here's how you know I flew into Montana I was doing a show and you're at the airport and when you look inside the stores yeah yeah and there's white people working yeah then you know you had a white place okay you know what I mean when the dude is sweeping up and there's white people working, then you know you're at a white place. You know what I mean? When the dude is sweeping up and it's a white dude, you're like, oh shit, it's white. That's funny, bro. When the cleaning ladies are white.

Even in Northern California, I remember when I first started doing comedy, I drove from LA to Seattle to do shows. Then I stopped at this town in Washington and it was a car wash and it was white kids and I was like, oh shit, it's like it really is white. White kids selling water. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Oranges on this side. You don't have to do this. Is that a white kid selling chicklets? Yeah. Yeah, dude. It was like, it was great. See now you're Trying to get way racist

He just came in And said the n-word Basically Yeah Chiclets Jesus Christ Only Mexicans Sell chiclets

We know this Okay I just Are you done Can I drink my water now Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead

Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead

Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead

Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead

Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead Go ahead I don't know. Thank you.