The Greatest Generation - A Tour of Bangers (S5E5)

Episode Date: January 23, 2017

When the Entrepreneur takes a smoke break in-between Uber missions, the ship is afflicted by some of the biggest bangers yet. The scattered crew have to do what they do best: solve problems that only crazy television writers could think up. What will befall all the extra glass tables in Ten Forward? What Christmas Pageant did these kids come from? Will Data’s suicide wish finally come true? What’s Worf going to do with the placenta? It’s the episode where our wives pull a Jeep out of a ditch.

Priority 1 message from Starfleet coming in on Secured Channel. Hey friends of Disodo. Before today's episode, we just wanted to take a moment to talk about the historic labor actions being taken by writers and actors in the American Film and Television industry. If you're a fan of the work done by the people who make Star Trek, we hope you'll join us in standing in solidarity with the folks who actually bring these adventures to life. Over the past several years, the AMPTP, the organization that represents the American Film and Television Production Studios, have reduced the profit from movies and TV going to workers. And in so doing,

they've attempted to weaken the labor unions that represent those workers. They wouldn't even engage the unions on many issues in their negotiations. And so a strike was the only course of action to take. Adam, Wendy and I have been having a lot of internal discussions about how best to stand with the unions and we are continuing those conversations in a dynamic situation. We're doing our best to understand where the picket lines are in these digital spaces,

and we would never intentionally cross one. With the information we have, we feel like we can do more good talking about and supporting the strike and continuing our show as planned. We'll keep you informed about what all this means for greatest trek specifically. Today we're making a contribution to the Entertainment Community Fund. This fund exists to help all the people whose livelihoods have been put on hold because the AMPTP refuses to negotiate

in good faith with the unions. It provides financial support for writers, actors, and all the thousands of laborers who make the shows that we talk about here and without whom we wouldn't have Star Trek to cast pot about. Those folks are all out of work because billionaires, company shareholders, and the executives of these companies don't want to compromise on the length of their yachts. We hope you'll join us in supporting entertainment workers in a challenging time, especially after they've already endured several years of challenges brought on by the pandemic

and season two of Star Trek Picard. We've set up a page where you can also contribute. It's at friendsofdecotoforlabor.com. That's friendsofdecotoforlabor.com. That's friendsofdisotoforlabor.com. Link in the episode description. Okay, now let's get on with the show. Welcome to the greatest generation! Star Trek Podcast by two guys who are a little bit embarrassed to have a Star Trek Podcast. I'm your host Adam Pranica. I am your other host, Benjamin R. Harrison.

Ben, I think we've begun keeping track of these things and in the contest of being recognized and seen and greeted out into the wild, I believe I'm now up to nothing after today. Because I was seen, Ben, I was seen, recognized, approached, handshook, and chatted with for a while from my friend Jimmy in Seattle. The people of the Pacific Northwest clearly have something against me because I go there frequently and nobody ever says hi to me. You know what it takes in Seattle Seattle you've heard of the Seattle chill right? The Seattle chill is a term of affection for what it's like socially

in Seattle which is you'll walk by people on the sidewalk and they won't regard your existence. Like you you're basically ignored here it's a city full of tyrannosaurus. I think that's what appeals to me so much about it is that's kind of my default mode. And what it takes to rise to like basic human decency level of socialization is having a hit podcast, Ben. That's what it takes. Smash it. I feel normal socially because I have the stupid podcast.

That's what it takes. Well, that's just good hard science, Adam. Kai and Jimmy came up to me. This wasn't an easy thing for him. I was with some friends and joined some beers, watching some footballs. Yeah, but Jimmy rolls up. He says, yeah, he rolls up and he's any like sort of like in a real sort of Ocea kind of way. It was like, Hey, I just wanted to let you know, really love your show.

Really think you and Ben are doing great. Like he did it out of your shot of my friends. And my friends are at the same table as me. That's great. Yeah, so he was really cool about it. And he was like, yeah, I'm here with my wife. She gave me a t-shirt for Christmas as a gift. And I was like, Jimmy, would have been far more embarrassing. Had you been wearing that shirt to this, to this encounter, I'm really glad you're not. Okay, we're gonna get a good check-up out of that.

Yeah, you get kicked out of a sports bar for wearin' that. We don't serve your kind here. Yeah, real good dude, real nice hang. He went on his way with his great wife, great gift giving wife. And that was it. So now in the span of a couple months, I've had two really great interactions with viewers. I recommend it, Ben. That's what I'm trying to say.

And it's two to nothing. So you need to get on the scoreboard. I have had chats with viewers, but always at like official max fund-related things. That's what I'm saying. It's different when you're just out in the wild, not associated. Yeah. I've also had the thing, it max-fun related things

where I'm there and my wife is there and I'm talking to somebody and she's like, did you know he has a show? Hahaha. So far this has happened in front of really close friends of mine where it's been like, it's felt great when the individual leaves and I turn back around and they're like, oh god They're, they're like, they're like Tasha yarring me, the I can't believe this

It is not happened with my wife around though. I can't wait for that to happen. That'll be that should count as two points. Yeah, that's I don't know I don't know if your wife's, uh, optic nerves can handle the strain that her eyeballs will, will put on them. It's a tremendous amount of torque when those things turn back around. Yeah. And that circumstance. Oh my God. That's like, it's like, how many Newton feet of torque are we talking about? I mean like, like she could pull a Jeep out of a ditch with the amount of torque that she's got on those eye rolls. She could pull a Jeep down a rainy hill while a Delophosaurus is running around.

What do you want? What do you want? Well, food, look at me. I just felt out of hill, I'm sucking wet, I don't have any food. Indeed. Well, I was happy for that little moment of joy today, and in otherwise, ho-hum weekend. Thanks for chatting me up, Jimmy. That was super fun. What a cool story. Well, do you want to get to the reason we came here, Adam? Yeah, we're not here to just socialize about our many viewers, our many kind viewer interactions.

We're here to talk about season 5, episode 5, disaster. This episode starts with some downtime, right? The ship appears to be just sort of putting through space, killing time, in between missions. They are taking their leisure. Yeah, and we get a scene in 10 Forward where a group has gathered around Miles and Keko, specifically around Keko's growing belly. Yeah, she went from zero to pregnant, man. I feel like Riker is super pumped to touch her belly because he just recently has also had a little bun in the oven in his own personal oven.

Yeah. A couple episodes ago. Yeah. When he was pregnant with an ankle yosoar. Yeah, he's like, do you think it'll have rave paint on it or? He understands pregnancy in a way that no one else in this group can, who are dudes. Yeah, and true to form, miles in Kiko are bickering. Yeah. It's a boy, Michael, after my father.

Wait a minute, we decided on hero, after my father. We talked about this last night. That's right, and we decided on hero. This poor kid. This is going to be great. Yeah. I'm going to be born into a divorce, I feel like. Yeah. At this point, I just wish it were over. Yeah. And I mean, everyone's sort of having a good time. It's a real, it's a real uplifting sort of beginning to the story, which sort of feels like the rollercoaster Clacking its way to the top of the big fall, right? Yeah, Riker is having the green punch of imminent doom.

There are glass tables like more glass tables than you remember in 10 forward at this point Yeah They've got the middle part of the glass tables opened up like to make it extra long the leafs and stuff the glass leaves for the Thanksgiving crowd to come through. Yeah, it's just a ton of glass. The doctor and and Jordi are down in a cargo bay and the doctor is trying to go Jordi into doing a few lines from a musical that she's excited excited to put on. from a musical that she's excited to put on.

Is her real deal like she's trying to twist his arm into some sort of performance thing she has going, but do you think that she believes that being a song and dance man will do better with the ladies? Do you think that's her true play here? Oh, she's gonna throw Jordi a bone without him even realizing it. Yeah, that's what I was thinking. Like make him a song and dance man. Yeah. It'll kill. It'll be less creepy.

That's an interesting thought. I mean... It worked for Barkley. Yeah. Barkley's knee-deep in it now. So that's going on. We've got Picard getting handed the awesome responsibility of taking Patterson, J. Gordon and Marissa around the ship. They are children that won the Enterprise Science Fair. This is a duty that the captain gets that are captain, the captain of the entrepreneur really does not relish. Now he's definitely definitely reticent to spend the day with three of the hundreds and hundreds of children

that live on the ship. Is it just me or do their science experiments kind of suck? I planted radishes and a special dirt and they came up all weird. Like how do you win a science fair by planting radishes into weird dirt? The kid is like seven years old, Adam.

That's not a project. What was your science project in the science fair? It was a pretty garbagey project. Yeah, exactly. My radish just turned out fine. They were not fucked up in a way that wins you ribbons. But anyways, this is the kind of frivolous bullshit that's going on on the entrepreneur today. Yeah. And the captain gets on the elevator with the kids. There's like, I think chief O'Brien and just like, you know, a few, like a handful of randos

and counselor Troy on the bridge. Everybody else is getting hammered and 10 forward. And the ship gets a banger dropped on it. Hello. Really one of the significant bangers we've ever seen, because it just bangs and bangs and bangs. It's like an earthquake that lasts the full minute. You can tell a big banger when they cut to other parts of the ship, and it's banging there too. Yeah.

Like, this is almost... They do a tour of bangers. Yeah, this is almost saucer section crashing and Star Trek generations level banger. I mean, it's not quite that big of banger, but like, that's the amount of cutting to other rooms we're talking about. It's a banger so bad that people are killed.

Yeah. It's pretty messed up. Yeah. Kako gets a bump on her noggin. It is a glass table holocaust and 10 forward. Yeah. We haven't seen a lot of glass tables set designed on this show for like the last season, and I feel like they saved them up for this one.

Yeah. Like don't set dress with the glass tables. We're saving it for this one. Yeah. Like don't set dress with the glass tables. We're saving it for episode five. They snuck them into the budget all through season four just so that they could have a big stockpile ready for this one. Yeah. The ship when we come back from the title sequence is in real bad shape. Like the lights are out everywhere. On the bridge they have no access to the turbo lifts, they have no comms with the rest of the ship, the people in ten forwarder have been banged up so much that it's it's essentially a triage ward The exterior shots shocking it is you're supposed to you're used to seeing this neon ship

Yeah, like with really bright lights and it's murdered out now. Mm-hmm. There's nothing there. It's scary. Yeah Yeah, the ship has been uh, has been lowered on its, on its axles. It's, it has clearly illegal tint. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, you suspect it has ground effects, but it's not moving, so they're not turned on. Yeah, like an air suspension that is just not comfortable for driving around. It's all looks. Yeah, yeah. This is form of a function for sure. And the, the, the sound of the license plate frame rattling is like the only idea that you have that it has a great big stereo system in it. Right. Yeah. It's so basic that it like, it vibrates your sternum bone, but you don't actually hear it. Yeah.

So, yeah, the officer that was on duty, Ensign No Name, on the bridge, has been totally covered in Lasagna. And the other Ensign who was at ops, like instead of going and running to her, like gets up and runs to the turbo lift and tries to pry it open with his bare hands. Chief O'Brien, the turbo lift artwork, we're trapped up here. Yeah, has zero luck.

Which was a funny move I thought. And Picard is in the elevator with three balling children and is not equipped to do comfort them or provide any solace that might be meaningful to them. I want you all to stop crying. Everything is going to be all right. These kids on the one hand, they have a thankless job, playing their roles, but at the same time, they are really rough. As child actors, I feel like they are not great. And I don't

know what it is, did they get loaded up with too much to do, or are they just not up to the level of being able to do what little they were given? I don't know. They all sort of feel like they're in back. Because the littlest kid is looking off screen all the time. Like he's spiking camera crew people in the back. Yeah.

That kid in particular, but all three of them to varying degrees sort of feel like they're in the Christmas pageant. Yeah, they really are. And God, I feel like if you're casting them, a big part of the casting session is act like you're crying. Like, give me real emotion and they are blowing it. Like, they sound like little baby pigs they really sound bad. I really wanted to turn off the episode at this point.

Picard is like. The skills were so annoying. Picard is like, you cries aren't even that realistic. You're gonna have to do something more convincing if you want my sympathy, Rudy. Yeah, and in the mailstrom, Picard has... Picard's fucked up. He's broken an ankle. And so he's down on the ground of the turbo lift. How did he break an ankle in there? They do... There's a lot of off- camera action that happens surrounding Picard that they don't do anything to, like it's sort of confusing, it's on the viewer to head cannon the threads

together. There's the ankle breakage, but also, like, this isn't too much of a jump forward, he gets out of the turbo lift that he has already proven that he can't reach the top of. Yeah. And they don't show how he does that. Yeah, those kids are not lifting the weight of that man. Yeah, that's not just dead weight, that's all dead weight. Yeah, that's like heavier than it looks, you know?

That's, is he wearing the action jacket in the scene? I think he takes it off for the tour up the elevator shaft. You could already give him the action jacket's bad look. Oh, what about this? That jacket is made of suede, high-tensillary strength. What if he tossed one of the arms up to them, had them tie it off somewhere, and then he hauled himself up with his beefy arm strength? Well, I feel like he's going gonna give that plan a lot of thought

before doing it because once you rub a rubbed spot into swayed and start getting a dirty, that's just a real bear to clean. Hmm, yeah. Yeah, you know, going on YouTube, there's definitely some good swayed cleaning tutorials on there. Especially challenging if it's shoes, but surprisingly, you can run them under, running water as long as you're really careful

about getting them super dry right after. That's right, stuff them with newspapers. It's gotta stuff them with the newspaper. That's exactly right Adam. That's the one thing they don't have in a perfect future, Ben. Where's those papers? You can't stuff your suede shoes for the iPad and isolinear chips. That's not going to happen.

Speaking of shoes, there's a couple of parts of this episode where you get to see the bottoms of Picard's shoes. Yeah. I really liked that. I like seeing that they're like worn out. Yeah. He doesn't have... He's not like a Chicago bull where he gets new shoes every game. Yeah, it was cool to see like the Clarks logo on the bottom. Yeah.

Yeah, cool to see that he stepped in gum at some point and got it mostly off, but not all of it. So comfy. Just a real nice walking around shoe. That's a nicely broken in shoe, you know. Yeah. I'm not going to replicate a new pair. These are great.

Yeah. Not long after this, Ensign Roe pops up on the bridge. [♪ INTRO MUSIC PLAYING [♪ She was in one of the turbo lifts and manages to pry the doors open. And it's our first time confronting the idea that Ensign Roe is not a one-off. I'm alive with the hell happened welcome back and she gets a fun entrance to fun entrance for Ensign Roe and a fun scene

I mean a fun episode I think too like the the way it breaks down on the bridge is the duty officer bought the farm in the collision and they've they've worked out that it was a quantum filament which is just a random thing in space that you can't detect apparently. So just like it could happen at any time and for any reason. But the awkward truth of the matter is that the Antitroi is the ranking officer on the deck and therefore is in command of the Enterprise while they are in Communicato with the rest of the ship. And Ensign Roe and Chifo Bryan immediately take up fairly antagonistic sides

of her senior staff. Roe is by far the more headstrong of the remaining bridge crew in terms of the course of action that she is recommending that they take. But I feel like O'Brien really performs admirably in this role. I don't think he's a dick about it. He is just real professional with his advice and how he treats what is really both the viewer and everyone else is supposed to realize is an ailey quiped leader. Right.

I believe Councillor Troy is the senior officer on the deck. Councillor Troy. She carries the rank of Lieutenant Commander. I, um, I'd appreciate some suggestions. And I think that this is a really cool episode for Troy because I kind of feel like the writing staff is like looking into the camera and in bending that they have really underwritten her so far. And they're saying, like, and this is the result of that, but we're gonna try and do better from now on. Yeah.

So like she is under-equipped, but it's this like really vulnerable performance where she seizes the, you know, she needs to be a leader and she rises to the occasion, but it's a journey. Yeah. And like, she begins that journey, sort of feeling bad about her circumstances and that like, she is because of the rule, the commanding officer in that moment, but she's sort of

apologetic about it with everyone. Like, she does not seize the crown in any way that that establishes her dominance and and that she is the leader for the rest of them. And it sort of allows Ro to fill that vacuum of leadership and really throw her weight around. Yeah, it's sort of she's sort of like a Kevin Smith character in that way. I'm not even supposed to be here today. Yeah. So this is a story that gets told in in a couple of different settings, right? We've got the bridge crew, skeleton crew, we've got the ten forward area, which has like riker and data and wharf, and Keko.

And Keko, right. And then you've got the doctor and Jordi in the cargo bay. Right. And Picard and the three balling children. Yeah. Yeah, and so it's sort of fun to have that story told in multiple different scenes. And every one of them has really big

stakes. Yeah. It's not just like an A story and a B story and a Dicency story. Like, people could die in every one of these scenes if things don't go exactly right. Right. It's real pulp fictiony in that way. There's no one one storyline that is the most important in the film. So let's go around the horn a little bit, Ben. The scene in the shuttle bay is that Jordi and Beverly are in there trying to get the door open and their fucking garage door clicker isn't working. They're trying to get the door open.

It's not happening, so they're fiddling around in the computer in the wall. And the doctor like takes a lean on the wall and she's like, ow! Yeah, she puts the back of her hand against it to check for heat as you're supposed to do like in a house fire. Yeah. She's like, Jordy, this wall is really hot. It's surprising that Jordy didn't pick that up on the visor, right? I thought the same thing. Yeah, what does that visor see if not heat? You can do metallurgy, but he can't do thermal stuff.

Yeah. Weird. Well, anyways, he's got his arm halfway down this hole when it explodes. Oh, my God. And there's this creepy green flame coming out of this wall panel they had opened up. That's a plasma fire.

It's putting out a lot of radiation. But also there's some barrels of some fissile material. The porotum in those containers is used in emergency thruster packs. It's normally pretty stable stuff, but when you expose porotum to radiation it's a way of exploding. Now when you work in an industrial area, you're going to want an OSHA approved fire extinguisher on hand at all times.

I recommend keeping all radio-sensitive materials in a lead-lined yellow barrel with nice bright red markings so that co-workers on the job site can tell that that's a dangerous substance. Now when you put out a plasma fire, you want to sweep the fire extinguisher along the floor. Aim at the base of the fire at all times. Make sure that your fire extinguisher has been recently inspected and serviced. If you don't know the inspection schedule, call your local firemasha. Yeah, and the deal with this plasma fire is that it's going to keep burning as long as there's air.

And they've got all this radioactive material in the shuttle bay with them. They only have hours to live at this point. It's a real thing. Not a great situation for them. So they're like, well, we don't have our mag liner in here. So we're just gonna have to so we're just gonna have to, we're just gonna have to hulk these barrels across the bay just to get them like a little bit further away from the fire. And that's like our opening move here,

but we're at a loss. Jordy's like, if you're not pregnant anymore, right? You can move these heavy barrels with me? Good. Hey, Doc, you should out that kid. So they start getting to work moving these barrels across the shuttle bay. Meanwhile, in 10 forward... Access to the bridge has been completely severed by emergency bulkheads. Six bay?

Heavy damage to section 23a is cut off access to six bay. They're looking at splitting up the group there. Reestablishing control of the ship should be our top priority. Agreed. Can we get to engineering? No sir. The most direct route is blocked. But I believe we can use a starboard service crawlway.

OK. You and I will try to get there, Mr. Warf. This room is about to fill up with a wounded in a few minutes of the gun to need help. I want you to stay in charge here. One of the consequences of this big banger is that communications is down and computers are crippled in such a way

that they really don't know what other parts of the ship, what condition the other parts of the ship are in. So they're really sort of blind. And they're sort of triaging the situation in their different areas. Like, well, if I'm closest to engineering, that's where I should go. And that's what the plan is from 10 forward.

Even though, like, on the map, engineering is a real fucking hike from 10 forward. Yeah, exactly. Like, why is it better for them to go there than the bridge? They're fucking 10 floors below the bridge. They're nine floors below the bridge. Yeah, that makes no sense. So they're gonna do the crawl through the Jeffries tubes to get to engineering. Picard is in the elevator and trying to get out the top.

And this is when he realizes that these kids are going to be dead weight until he can get them functioning again. And so he comes up with actually like a pretty clever scheme for managing them, which is he gives them field commissions. So the girl who's like the oldest of the three is given a couple of tips and declared to be his number one, Jake Gordon is the science officer and little Patterson is the botanist or something. He's like the chief of radishes. Yeah, which in a weird way out ranks O'Brien, like at all times.

Yeah. I mean, that's sort of what Keko's actual job is too, so. Yeah, the captain pips them out. Yeah, if you like it, then you should have put a pip on it. Yeah, so what Picard's able to do is martial their effort and sort of beat back the crying. Yeah. But neither of those things is able to get him on the roof of the turbo lift, which he magically does.

Yeah. That's a scene we don't see. We don't see that. There was also the part where he had them like hauling the cables out of the thing. Maybe he made a rope out of that. Is that what he did? I was paying attention.

Didn't they like dig the cables out of the box? They did. They did, but we don't see how the cables were used. I don't know. I'd like throw a lasso to the roof of the turbo lift. Adam, who cares? It's just a that's just a detail man. It's about the relation. A little stickler for continuity. Well, if if you were stickler for continuity well if uh... here's to clear for continuity uh... you would have been complaining about the fact that marissa had the pips on her collar and then he decides to

make her number one and gives her some tips for her color right yeah not great i'm a cute is a ball you will assist us i'm am the cutest of all. You are the all. And 10 forward, Keko is about to have that baby. Yeah, I guess all the jossling really shook things loose down there. I mean, I don't know how babies work. So I'm just assuming

that with what, with all the glass table shattering and the falling on the ground and the head strike that happens, babies coming. The baby is like, I gotta get the fuck out of here. Yeah, it's really like about self-preservation for the baby. This might be the baby's only way to escape the relationship with miles and Kiko. Yeah. If you can just sort of sneak out during a disaster. I love that. So, like, Wurf has sort of been given the job of medical officer in, uh,

in 10 forward. I love the doula. I love his bedside manner. I'm going into labor. Who cannot? This is not a good time, you know. I would love to just like have this series, but with Beverly and Worf's roles reversed. Just to see an entire series of Worf's, you know, like you have stage four breast cancer, abandoned hope. Dr. Worf, medicine man. If you didn't want to choke,

you shouldn't have aspirated on your food. Shameful. Yeah. It's great to just sort of retcon all of the six Bay scenes that we've seen with Beverly and just sort of mentally replace her with Wharf. Yeah. It's a lot of fun. Only a coward bleeds when they cut theirself on paper.

Can you imagine O'Brien goes in there with a separated shoulder from kayaking? Ha ha ha ha. Worf just turns him away. Yeah, not to date curly-haired man. Kayaking is not a warrior sport. So the Keko labor scene is commencing up on the bridge, row and O'Brien are real loggerheads because they've discovered that the containment feel

around the ANSI matter pods is declining quickly. And if it gets below 15% of normal field strength, that means the field is gonna collapse and the ship will usblow. Troy is playing a very important role in this scene and every other scene, which is the viewer's proxy. Right. They have to explain all of this shit to her

because she doesn't get the danger. Like they're talking techno speak back and forth and Troy's like, well, what does that mean? And then they have to explain it to her, which is basically a turn to camera for us. Yeah. The field strength is at 40% and it is still falling. And it falls to 15%.

The field will collapse. And we'll have a containment breach. Which means? Which means the ship will explode. The position Ro has taken is like, we don't have any evidence that anybody in the star drive section is alive. So let's get the saucer out of here under impulse and potentially save hundreds of group people from that thing blowing up. And O'Brien is like, well, wait, we don't know if there are people alive in the StarDrive.

Let's try and give them a shot at repairing this situation so that we can try to save everybody. And that's actually like a preview legitimate conflict, I think. Like the, those two, the two sides of that argument are both really legitimate, given the information they have, and they both feel really strongly that they're, they've taken the right position. Yeah. Yeah, you can definitely make the case for both sides, and they do. And so Troy's stuck in the middle. Yeah. Yeah, you can definitely make the case for both sides and they do. And so Troy's stuck in the middle. Yeah. This scene sort of made me wonder if O'Brien has a better relationship with Roe than he does with Keko though, because for all of their disagreement, they stay pretty respectful of each other.

pretty respectful of each other. And it doesn't like occasionally devolves into a little bit of ad hominem, but for the most part, they're prepared for the other person to present some information that will change their mind, you know? Row is fairly openly contemptuous of Troy. Yeah, because I think her thing is like, you know, this is something I actually work on. Yeah. And because of some technicality with how Starfleet issues ranks to counselors, you're the commanding officer and you're not actually trained for this. Yeah, like, hey, Deanna, why don't you cancel the TurboLift doors open? Oh, wait, that's not working, is it?

Well, in the cargo bay, Jordi and the doctor have come up with a plan for putting this fire out, and it's a two birds with one stone type of plan. What they're going to do is hit a button that blows the hatch and lets all the air out of the bay, also blowing all of the barrels out and also blowing the fire out. The downside of this is that they're going to be in there because they don't have any way to get out either and they're going to have to.

The two panels, the one that opens the door and the other one that pressurizes the room are on opposite sides of the bay from each other. So, this is a risky maneuver. Now, when you design in a galaxy class, stash it. You're going to want to put the panel that pressurizes the shuttle bay across the shuttle bay from the panel that opens the shuttle bay door. Much like when you're installing a sink disposal, you want the switch to be far enough away

that a nominal human adult can't have the hand in the drain when the grinder is running. have the hand in the drain when the grinder is running. Yeah, it's a real wedding ring in the garbage disposal situation for Jordy and Beverly right now. And that shuttle pay. And they're sort of teasing a end of aliens moment here, which is an exciting amount of tension building. Sure is. And I was like, oh, man, I am ready to see this doctor get blown horizontally one more time.

I know. Sort of remove. It is. It's more of a move than her tap dancing. Yeah. The kids and the captain are debating how to escape the elevator and the kids refuse the captain's order to get out of there without him. This is unfortunately Adam I think our episode of Crimson Tide in Space because it devolves

into Captain Picard climbing up a ladder with three children singing around a friar jacqua What we need is a climbing song Farajacca, Farajacca, Dormévou, Dormévou Soni lematina, Soni lematina, Ding ding dong, ding ding dong. Very good. Now keep singing. It's a pretty unfortunate scene, Dan. Yeah, that sounds the acoustics of the Turbo Lift shaft are great for that song though. Yeah, I mean the epic scene of watching a Turbo Lift crash to the bottom of the shaft is enough to force them into

song and that's the song they choose to sing. It's a pretty metal moment that they totally they totally kneecap. Fair enough and then Kiko pushes out that baby right? Yeah. Yeah that baby comes out with the help of Dula Wurf, Dula Edition Wurf, which is an action figure version of him, I don't think we have the option of buying. Yeah, he's got like, cowrie shells woven into his hair and like some amber beads on a necklace. I feel like our buddy B-Tills could put together

a hacked version of a W dwarf action figure and like put together dual a war. Yeah. He's pretty crafty like that. He's got these got the skills to put something like that together. Be Tilly of course the friend of ours who does our great Star Trek cards on Twitter. Have you been getting a load of the Riker collection VHS box art that's been going up on Twitter? I have. Oh my god. I've been getting a big load of that.

Yeah, that's at Ann Killser on Twitter is doing those on that. Man, I mean, I think she's kind of giving Bill Tilly a run for his money. No pressure or anything. From all the links to the crafters' Like, I remember mentioning how much fun it would be to have the Riker collection exist in that pink neon script, and here it is. It is perfect. Yeah, it's pretty awesome.

So fucking good. She does the thing that Bill Tilly does so well, which is she finds the screenshot that perfectly says what you're trying to say. Yeah, yeah, exactly. It's real fun. And is fully adding to the comedy. Yeah. You know, it's it's it's not retelling the joke. It's telling it better. Yeah, she's telling it better for sure. Yeah. Well, Worf rises to the occasion. The card just stands there with a catchers' mitt, like just waiting. Yeah.

You're not going to want to eat a sandwich off at that table and tend forward after a cake. I was giving birth on it. That's for sure. Yeah. That might have to be exclusively for playing Strada Jima from now on. You shoot that one out of the torpedo, too, I think, and just let it float free. Of all the souls I've encountered and my time in Starfleet, this table had the most human

endometrium on it. This table had the most juices. Most... Pocenta. Boy, I bet Worphs down to eat that placenta. Oh yeah. Oh yeah, come on. That's a warrior's meal right there.

Shop it up over some gauk. Oh yeah, you're not making tea out of it. You're just eating it raw. Yeah. Delicious. And it turns out it's a baby girl, not a baby boy like Kiko is predicting. Jury in the doctor, blow all the air into space, the doctor manages to make it to the panel, repressurize the bay.

And that leaves data and riker who have traversed, I think they said 50 meters of Jeffries tubes, which the math on that doesn't really compute either. What the hell? On their way to engineering. Did you like that scene where data actually got to try suicide on for size? In one of the great data suicide callbacks, they come across a barrier that seems pretty insurmountable. It's basically a wall of lightning. It's the most insane barrier of all time.

Data and Riker look at this thing and they're like, well, how are we going to get past this thing? What they need is like a broom, a wooden broom that isn't going to conduct any electricity. Data's like, well, I'm one of those. A bunch of my body framework is made up of tri-pollimers, a non-conductive material. And as if that wasn't macabre enough, he talks riker into dismounting his head and taking it with him for the rest of the journey.

So when they show up in engineering, what's happened is the bridge crew have shunted some of the some of the emergency power that they managed to get down to the panel in engineering that shows that there's a problem with anti-matter containment and Riker is able to like hot wire data's head into into the computer system with literally moments to spare before the containment collapses and they save the ship just in the nick of time and Ro has to admit to O'Brien that she had it all wrong.

Then we get the sweetest sugary-est button on an episode, maybe ever, don't we? Yeah, well, everything is all good. The ship is heading back to Starbase for repairs. Troy saunters onto the bridge with the three kids and she zings the hell out of Riker. He's like, hey, how did Command suit you? You like that big chair or what? And she's like, I don't think I'm cut out to be Captain. First officer may be, I understand there aren't many qualifications. Slide whistle.

Yeah. And then the kids give a plaque commemorating their experience to Captain Picard and He's thanks them and as he's walking off he tells number one You've got the bridge and both Marissa and and Riker say I I Captain and It's a it's a slide whistle for sure, but Adam. It sort of dukes a hazard this ending. Yeah. But I feel like the slide whistles of your were sort of hapless.

Yeah. And this one felt really earned. This was intentionally hapless. Yeah. It was cute. Yeah, it was real cute. I don't know I feel about it though. It was like Basically everyone in the scene was antiqued with powdered sugar. It was so sweet real sweet like winking the card winks

The card hates kids. I think he's come around. I Don't know. I would have been good with it if not for the wink. Like, the wink was too much. And where's he gonna put that plaque? I know. Like, there better be some plat continuity, Ben. There's all these little props that Picard has collected over the course of his time as captain,

like the Mintaken bandage thing, and the knife that the slick back kids stabbed him with. Yeah. I feel like this is not going to be quite as lovingly preserved as some of those other things. What's the name of the girl the older girl Marissa. Marissa does that thing that you just can't do like one of the rules of presentations is that you don't read the slide when you're doing a presentation. And when they present the plaque to Picard, she basically says exactly what's on it.

You get to do better than that Marissa, seriously. Real garbage presentation if you ask me. One thing that I found really heartening about this plaque was for Halloween this year. I went as Wesley Crusher, the boy, the boy. And I made my own communicator badge because I forgot that he didn't have a communicator badge in the uniform that I was wearing. And I just made it at a cardboard by kind of tracing the two shapes and cutting them out

and gluing them on top of each other. And it came out looking really bad, but it looks, it's a dead ringer for the Starfleet badge that the kids drew on this plaque. So yeah. I don't feel that bad after all. You demonstrated like a nine-year-old's crafting ability. Yeah.

That's what you're saying. Yeah, I'm, I'm, I'm J Gordon level crafting. a nine-year-old crafting ability. Yeah. That's what you're saying. Yeah. I'm J. Gordon level crafting. Congratulations. Did you like this episode, Adam? I did enjoy the episode, but it is very flawed. It is profoundly flawed. The continuity is totally fucked up.

How come Jordy and Bev can open the door into space, but they can't open the door into the corridor? Like, the clicker works for one of the shuttle bay doors, but not the other. I didn't get that. There's the whole continuity with Picard getting out of the turbo lift shaft. And then there's data guessing correctly that he would not be killed by the lightning. It really asks you to take a number of leaps here. Yeah, but I think that it's sort of an episode that confirms the theory that you were

advancing recently that Star Trek is a place. This is like a series of little stories that happen in that place. It's not some big existential crisis or some time-space rift that they have to puzzle their way through. It's just like, you know, this bad thing happened and these characters that we now know have to have to kind of cope and I like that it's just kind of a bunch of little vignettes about about them and You know largely is a very loving series of vignettes, you know, it gives

More for them each to do than they often get I completely agree it really It shows the potential that the show has when they decide to share the ball a little bit among, among different groupings of crew members. And they choose to tell the story in terms of place instead of plot. Like they did a great job here. They also did not take the bait of cartooning up Troy's inability to command. Like they could have really fucked up her character and made fun of her and have been cruel about it, but they weren't. Like she was unprepared and she knew it, but she still led. She was not the right choice to lead, but she did because that was her rank and she did

a good job. Yeah, she's the hero we have right now. Yeah, totally. So like this episode cashed in on a lot of good potential here. So I liked it. Yeah. Adam, we have a light blinking here. And occasionally that means we have priority one messages

to check in on. Shall we take a look? Let's do it. Priority one message from Starfle in on, shall we take a look? Let's do it. Priority one message from Starfleet coming in on Secured Channel. Need a supplement on it. supplement on it? supplement supplement

Yes, extra. But the interest alone could be enough to buy this ship! Hey team, Adam is literally traveling in the far east, so he's not here to do jumbo tronds with me at time of editing this episode, so I'm going to do him myself. Our first priority on message here is a commercial message, and here it is. Are you a nerd? You must be, if you're listening to this show and hearing this message, so subscribe to the greatest nerd history podcast from the Alpha Quadrant.

The Internet History Podcast, histories of everything from the Netscape Browser to the iPhone, and oral histories and in-depth interviews with the people that made it happen. Everyone from the inventor of the MP3 to the guy that first tried online dating, subscribe to the Internet History Podcast at wherever podcasts happen for you. That sounds like an excellent show. Otherwise I wouldn't look to it if you want a history of the Hussnack. I did away not only with all Hussnack everywhere, but also with the history of the Hussnack.

I'm the only person you're ever gonna hear about Hussknock from. And maybe that will make a question whether the Hussknock are even a thing, or maybe it's just a yarn that I speak to make everybody fear me. Well, I'll let you scratch your head about that, but you should go subscribe to this parrot catch right now. Thanks so much to the Internet history podcast for that message. That sounds like a great show. I'll definitely be subscribing.

We have one personal message here. It is from Andrea and it is to Gabe. Here's that one. Happy birthday to my number one. Thank you for being an amazing guy who's smarter than Jean-Luc and sexier than Ryker. Have a great 36th year of life, Gabe. And then Andrea goes on to ask Adam and I too. Do something that will make this extra fun for Gabe.

So I'm gonna assume that that is probably something to do with Pocosby, so. It's your 36th birthday, Rudy! I hope you have a delicious cake that doesn't have any pudding anywhere near it. I won't be able to attend your party because I'm a fictional character and that's better for everyone. See you! So those are... Those are our priority one messages.

Sorry Adam wasn't here for that, but he will be back soon. And if you would like to leave a priority one message, go to maximumfund.org slash jembo-drone. It's a hundred bucks for a personal message and 200 for a commercial message. Big part of how we fund the existence of this show and they are much appreciated. Thanks. fun to the existence of this show and they are much appreciated. Thanks!

A greatest-gen live show is something you don't want to miss. Why? Well, it's a great opportunity to see me and Ben in person, but that's not all. FODs from all over gather at these shows to cosplay, to do pre and post show hangs, to make friends, and share their embarrassment. Hey, let's make a pretty great name for a tour. Let's do it. The Sherry Reembarishment Tour is coming in August 2023, and we've got a bunch of dates

in a lot of great places. Go to GreatestGenTour.com to get more info. That's GreatestGenTour.com for dates and ticketing information for the Share Your Embarrassment Tour. I'm Jordan Morris. And I'm Jesse Thorne. On Jordan Jesse Go, we make pure, delightful nonsense. We were open awesome guests and bring them down to our level.

We got stupid with Judy Greer. My friend Molly and I call it having the spaceweards. Pat Noswald. Can I get a Balrog burger and some air-gorn fries? Thank you. And Kumail Nanjiani. I've come back with cat toothbrushes, which is impossible to use. Come get stupider with us at MaximumFun.org. Look, your podcast apps are already open. Just pull it out.

Give Jordan Jesse Goatry. Being smart is hard. Be dumb instead. He opens his bullet out, give Jordan Jesse Goat dry. Being smart is hard, be dumb instead. Oh, rats, hey, hey, oh, I'm about to count you in mine. These clouds are really freaking me out. I hate having to stand in line. And boy, what do I? These giraffes do not smell good.

No, they do not, and they've such short naps. But I'm hearing we need to get on this horse. We've got to get on the ark. It is about terrain, about a spout to destroy humanity. Hey, oh, sorry, sorry, sorry. Are you Noah? Yeah, I know we look like humans. We're actually, we're podcasters.

We are podcasters, so it's different. Have you heard of Ono Ross and Carrie? We investigate spirituality, claims of the paranormal, stuff like that. And you have a boat and say the world's gonna end, so seem like something for us to check out. We would love to be on the boats. We came two by two.

What do you think? O'Neil Ross and Kerry, available on MaximumFun.org. [♪ Music playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing self-adrunximota. Boy, I did. There is that big banger sequence at the beginning of the episode. And it's just begging to be turned into a sliding into your DMs like GIF. Yeah, exactly. And there's a couple of no-names in the background of 10 forward playing three-dimensional space chess. As the banger is, like in between the first and second banger, there's a guy that's just frantically trying to put all the chess pieces back where they were. Just really made me laugh because like the ship is shaking around like crazy. It's like, fuck my game of chess

He really has a lot on the line there. Yeah That poor guy. Yeah He's probably dead now. He felt like a real drunk Shimoda thing to do. Yeah, yeah, my drunk Shimoda goes to Riker in the scene where they're in the Jeffries tube crawling along and they're confronted with the lightning barrier. I mean, we sort of made light of how fast the decision is made that data would jump into it,

like a man jumping into a subway car who doesn't like his job. Like, they have a legit huddle up where they have sort of the conversation like, are you sure this is going to work? Yeah, I think so. And one of the things that Riker says is, are you suggesting we use your body as a means to disrupt the lightning? And that to me is like, that's just perfect, Rikeriker because he just gets consent even for non-sex stuff.

Like, he's being super clear on yes, meaning yes, about this crazy plan. So I'm definitely given my Shimoda to riker for that. Right on riker. The master of consent. Mm-hmm, love it. What do we have coming up in the next episode? The next episode is season five, episode six.

The game, the fate of the Federation is in Wesley Crusher, the boys hands, when he returns to find the crew of the entrepreneur addicted to a dangerous new game. Do you remember this episode, Adam? This is our Robin Leffler centric episode. Yeah. The Foxy Leffler. Getfler centric episode. Yeah. Get a little left. Yeah. This is one of my favorite episodes. Yeah. I love this episode. This

is this is some people hate this episode like they hate Darmak and I understand how people could hate Darmak. It's you either love that episode or you don't but I don't understand the hate for the game, the game's fun. It's one of those place episodes, isn't it, right? Don't hate the game, hate the players. It's not a specific Star Trek story, it's a thing that happens in a Star Trek world, and I love that. Yeah.

It does have a little bit of an after-school special vibe to it, and it's pretty hilarious that they have to bring Wesley back for that reason. It's too bad that part of the episode isn't Wesley recalling Tasha's admonishment about how bad drugs are. Yeah, that would have been great. It would have been good. Well, would you veto this one or it sounds like it? No, I love this episode and I would defend it with a counter veto if you tried any funny business. So I definitely want to see it. I think we'll have a fun time with it. Yeah, I want to save my vetoes for something really bad this season. So I also will not veto. So that's the next

episode. If you like this episode or any other episode and want to help us get the word out about the show, go to iTunes and leave us a nice review. If you like this episode or any other episode and want to help us get the word out about the show, go to iTunes and leave us a nice review. If you'd like to talk to us on Twitter, use the hashtag GreatestGen. There's a lively community, built tillies up there, putting up baseball cards, and Kilser is up there to and, uh, riker collection VHS is there's so much fun content going on on there and that is nothing to diminish the great stuff that happens in the Facebook group and on the Reddit. A real sweet community of people have grown up around this show and we feel so lucky every single time we get to interact with that community. If you like the music we play on the show, our title and interstitial music is done by the one

Dark Materia and with other supporting music done by our friend Adam Rekusia. Yeah, the great Adam Rekusia. And I think that just about wraps it up, Adam. Yeah, I think so. Well, with that, we will be back at you next time with another great episode of Star Trek, the Next Generation, and an episode of the greatest generation that is super addictive, despite the fact that it doesn't look like it would actually be that fun. Yeah, what's up with that? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Make it sound.

Make it sound. Make it sound. Make it sound. Maximumfund.org Comedy and culture. Artistone. Listener supported.