The Greatest Generation - Happy Bronson (ENT S3E19)
Episode Date: September 15, 2025When a crescendo of bangers suddenly gets called off, the Xindi council is in disarray and decides to return Archer to the NX-01. But after another damaged ship asks for assistance, an even Darker Arc...her decides to rob them instead. Where is the fun part of a Rick Caruso development? What could have been a top-three visual in the entire series? Who’s the Guinan of this show? It’s the episode where Xindi Oprah is giving out some very special prizes!Support the production of The Greatest GenerationGet a thing at podshop.biz!Sign up for our mailing list!Follow The Game of Buttholes: The Will of the Riker - Quantum LeapThe Greatest Generation is produced by Wynde PriddySocial media is managed by Rob Adler and Bill TilleyMusic by Adam Ragusea & Dark MateriaFriends of DeSoto for: Labor | Democracy | JusticeDiscuss the show using the hashtag #GreatestGen and find us on social media:YouTube | Facebook | X | Instagram | TikTok | Mastodon | Bluesky | ThreadsAnd check out these online communities run by FODs: Reddit | USS Hood Discord | Facebook group | Wikia | FriendsOfDeSoto.social
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Here's to the finest crew in starving.
When it comes to my crew, you won't get any argument for me.
This is a parody.
Paramount owns the sun.
Welcome to the greatest generation.
It's a Star Trek podcast by a couple of guys just a little bit embarrassed about having a Star Trek podcast.
I'm Adam Pranika.
I've Ben Harrison.
We're on camera today, Adam.
I mean, we're always on camera.
Always are.
pretty much watches the stream.
A few people listen on the podcast, but...
Sure.
We're going to post this part to our YouTube as well.
It's true.
That's because it's a code 47.
Captain, I'm sorry to disturb you.
I'm receiving a code 47.
Verify.
It is code 47, sir.
Start lead emergency frequency.
Captain's eyes only.
It's been a long time.
Oh, yeah.
So long, in fact.
Why don't you give us an update on how nice the postal workers were when you went to pick up
are largesse of male.
I have to say, I've been twice in the last few weeks,
and the vibes have been much, much improved.
Immaculate, even?
I mean, you know, it's a post office.
I'm never going to call the vibes immaculate.
I got good post office vibes last time I went.
That's good.
Think about a postal worker behind the glass.
They don't want to give you a pen.
No.
If you do not have a pen on you, they do not want to loan you,
theirs. And I don't know. I was vibing with this dude. I was like, hey, dude, I wrote this
wrong. I could really use your Sharpie. And he's like, man, really not supposed to do this.
And I was like, come on, man. And I give him like the two finger thing. Like, look at my two eyes.
I'm looking at your two eyes. Like, you poked him in the eyes and he put his hand up like a fin to
stop you? The code for you got eyes on me. I got eyes on you. I also like pointed the two fingers
at the Sharpie. I was like, eyes, eyes, Sharpie. Like, no one is letting this out. Yeah. I mean,
if he knew you as well as I know you, he would have no concerns that his Sharpie is walking
away. Yeah. But that's not, I mean, most people. What do you think that is going, like,
if you're a postal worker and you work at my post office, a bulletproof glass free post office,
an open air post office, are you like, what, what gives? Is my life not worth protecting as much
is the post office down the road with the two inches of lusite?
This post office in question was right next to the grove, which has me asking, what's going on
near the grove?
Man, this is the thing about Rick Caruso.
It's like he creates this perfect little simulacrum of safety.
No, I would say he creates the perfect simulacrum of a walkable city in all respects.
Yeah, and then he pushes all of the degeneracy to the immediate outside of that.
Yeah, the fun part.
The outskirts.
But we got a few packages.
One or two that I've been sitting around here for a long time.
I feel a little bit bad about it.
As ever, we hope they're not food.
Yes.
Because Bill Tilly tastes everything.
He does.
Before it makes it to us.
Yeah, and brown wine will be consumed, but we're not going to be happy.
about.
Update to the brown wine situation of last week's quarks bar.
I, uh, just a little behind the pod, I had about half of that bottle and felt full
bottle drunk.
And that's because I think it over-alcoholized through its aging.
It was, it was about 10 years old.
Yeah.
Damn.
And, uh, that's what happened.
It was like super high-proof wine.
It was like, uh, it was like pruno.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You basically had prison hooch last week.
And let me tell you something, Ben.
I think you got a taste for it.
Yeah, yeah.
I put a cork in that thing and I finished the rest with dinner.
Are you starting to look for like prison-themed bars in your neighborhood?
Like, you know, there's tiki bars to make you think you're in the tropics.
There's also pruno bars to make you think you're in the cooler.
I'm keeping it more local than that, Ben.
I got a bathroom near the studio out here in the ADU.
I got a Zi-Lock bag.
with some fruit rinds and stuff in there.
I've started my own batch.
Amazing.
Great.
Well, I can't wait to taste it next time I come over and visit.
Yeah.
We're going to start today with a beautiful postcard.
Wow.
This is a hand-drawn postcard of Quark and Moran hanging out at Quark's Bar.
Did it go through the mail like that?
It did.
What?
It arrived perfect.
I mean, if anything's immaculate at the post office.
It's this card.
It comes from Kyle F out of St. Paul, Minnesota.
Incredible. Dear Ben and Adam, please enjoy a hand-painted postcard. I don't know any money in my life that likes DS-9 personally, only parasocially. Thanks for years of entertainment. I'm sure I'll catch up on the pod someday. And his blue sky handle is at Nadthorne. N-A-T-H-O-R-N-E.b-Sky-Soucial. Really gorgeous stuff. I'm going to put that right up on my wall.
That is really nice. That's really great.
stuff. We should
collaborate on some artwork
together, some Greatest Gen artwork. Wouldn't that be fun?
That would be great.
Nadthorne, of course, is what
happens when you drag your
nards through
a prickly bush.
Yeah, through a gorse bush.
Maybe.
This one, Adam, this looked
really familiar to me. Maybe we
opened another one just like it. This is
from Defested.
Okay. And it's two both
of us, and I found it sitting here, and I was like, man, this looks like something I feel like
I remember opening. You remember Defested sent us those things for sealing wax? Yes.
Is it possible that this is just another one of those, and Defested sent two, and we only
opened one of them? Let's find out. Okay, I'll open it up. Did this fall between the cracks of
your broken studio chair? Like a lost piece of mail on a mail truck? I'm still in my broken
studio chair, which only is in the lean back position anymore.
It's really making life delightful, especially this past week where I've been doing a lot
of desk work in particular.
You got up and left during a production meeting and me and Wendy were hypothesizing whether
or not that was a new chair or not.
She thought it was a new chair, and I said, no fucking way.
No.
I don't have money for it.
How would I afford a new chair?
Yes, this is another set of stamps.
We can use to seal envelopes.
Finally!
There's a BH one.
That's cool.
Hey, that's really nice.
I'll go with that one.
Yeah, of course.
That is a greatest generation logo one with the Starfleet Delta and the lasers.
That's real nice.
And just a regular old Starfleet Command Delta one.
There's a little unit.
that they magnetized to?
So, just to be clear, there is no AP stamp?
I think that that must have come in the other one.
Must have, yeah.
Let me see if I have that over here.
That would make great pod if you went in search for that.
I found it.
Hey!
Hey, absolutely no editing is what happened just then.
Ben instantly found it.
There it is, my initials.
AP.
Pretty great.
And you even got, like, cooler lettering than I did.
I mean...
Mine's just regular lettering.
Yours is cool.
Me and Defested are good buds.
God damn it.
What did I do to piss Defested off?
This is my question.
I don't know.
I mean, they probably have a list.
Yeah, I'm guessing.
Maybe that's why my medical app doesn't work all the time.
Devastas going in there and putting their thumb on the scale.
Okay.
We've got another package here.
This one is from Brian Fernandez out of Huntley, Virginia.
Feels like books.
I'm going to go ahead and guess books.
But there's a letter.
Dear Ben and Adam, I have been a long-time FOD
since that article in that magazine I don't read
apparently bumped you up high enough
that my podcatcher recommended you.
I remember when you were preparing to move on to DS9.
During the Bible readings,
I would often think about the enclosed book.
I purchased my copy when I was in high school in the 90s.
I am the middle brother to the both of you
from what I have been able to.
discern of your ages. I was the only Trekkie nerd for miles. And I, too, dreamed of film school.
The contents of this book and the old Making of Star Trek book made Hollywood something
I could understand and aspire to be a part of someday. I think you will both find the contents
fascinating. I haven't noticed anything about split diopter lenses, but it wouldn't surprise me.
I have wanted to send you my copy for years, but there was more to the story. When I was a poor
broke teen. I went to a convention and Andrew Robinson listened to me talk about wanting to go to
film school and graciously signed my book even though I couldn't afford his headshot. So now surely
Ben understands. I can't give away such a gift. So I purchased one to send to you. Then of course,
I was worried that that was rude. So I planned on sending two. Then COVID happened. Then we couldn't
afford to pay Max Fund for a while. And I was too embarrassed to send a book when I couldn't even pay for the
subscription. Oh, don't worry about that, man. Like, we don't, we don't know who is and isn't
paying. That's totally opaque to us. You and this person should be friends. I love this guy.
Years later, I thought I lost the third copy. My wife says I never reordered it. So I have ordered yet
another copy so I can finally complete the task I set out for myself in 2019. Please enjoy these
used copies of an old book, which are either the second and third or second and fourth
copies I have purchased in my life of the same book. I've enclosed in each of your books a photocopy
of the autograph of that King Among Kings, Andrew Robinson. Sincerely, B. Fernandez of Virginia.
P.S. Attached is a picture of what my copy looks like now. You probably wouldn't want it. I put
plastic on it in the 90s, but then it sat on the toilet at my college house for like five years.
PPS, my wife says, if we ever find another copy here that isn't my old gross copy,
She will send in a P1 to let you all know.
Because all she does is bets, bets, bets.
P, P, P.S.
I did make it to film school, just like you.
Again, I no longer work in video editing.
Wow.
Oh, man.
What a story, Brian Fernandez.
Here is the copy we're glad we didn't get.
Yeah, don't need the toilet book.
Cool.
And here's one of the nice, fresh used copies that Brian sent.
Oh, yeah. Look at that cover. Nice and glossy. Definitely not spent any time on a toilet.
Almost no weaponized fecal matter coagulated on its surface.
No.
Oh, man, I love this. Schematic pictures of the insides of runabouts and stuff.
Oh, how fucking sexy.
Do you think it would make Brian happy or disappointed if we both took these books and
put them on our toilets.
In honor of him.
My toilet is a pretty high action zone right now, given the almost three-year-old who's
learning to use it at the moment.
Here's a question about toilets.
I'm seeing a lot of toilets with buttons in the middle of the lid.
Yeah, that's what my toilet has.
Yeah.
By going in that direction, what we're doing is taking out a great place where books used to
live.
Yeah, but it wasn't a great place for books to live.
Because then when you had to, like, fiddle with the little chain inside,
you had to move everything off the top of the cistern to do it.
Always do.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm a clean lid now.
Just button.
Just button.
Yeah.
And it's good because it's like enough out of the way that the toddler isn't going and flushing it, you know, willy-nilly.
Because toddlers love levers.
They love seeing the result of an action.
Now it's just one button only.
Thank you so much, Brian.
Thanks, Brian.
One last thing here.
This is from Clayton out of St. Helena, California.
And I believe Clayton was the fellow who won our contest in the Max Fund Drive.
It was the winner of a nub and bug.
Amazing.
For joining and or boosting during the Max Fund Drive.
Oh, man, look at how lucky I am.
I opened it at this end.
That's the end the letter is at.
You should buy a lottery ticket.
I know.
I mean, I would never, but
I appreciate the use of the expression.
Keeping it fun.
Yeah.
It's Benjamin R. Harrison.
Dear Adam and Ben, I'm still in a state of shock over having won the Nubbinbug during the
Greatest Gen Drive.
Truly, I never win anything.
The two exceptions are the Nubbinbug and a book on CD of William Shatner's
autobiography, which was taped under my seat at Greatest Gen Con in Brooklyn, like six
years ago, or whenever that was.
I still haven't listened to it, and I don't have a CD player.
I'm so sorry.
Well, I'm very disappointed.
Yeah, I mean.
I was expecting a book report like two years ago.
What do you think we got that book for free?
We did get that book for free.
The Nub and Bug is truly an honor when I'm embarrassingly proud to have on display in my office,
causing my wife to roll her eyes every time she walks by.
Thank you so much.
In any event, my cup runneth over with your generosity.
I feel it only appropriate to fill yours
and hopefully Wendy's, Rob's, and Bills as well
with some wine from my wife's family vineyard.
Whoa!
Oh, what?
A replenishment of FOD wine.
This is amazing.
What timing. Incredible.
This is a real lose-lose situation for her.
These are two of my favorites,
a Cabernet Sauvignon for the Red Wine Enthusiast at Uxbridge Shimoda
and a Sauvignon Blanc for the Cougars.
It sounds like neither of those is for me.
me, because I'm a brown wine enthusiast.
Please enjoy in good spirits, and thank you for all you do to improve the lives of FODs
everywhere. If you ever find yourselves up in Napa Valley, I hope you'll hit me up.
Warmly, Clayton. P.S. When you asked me if I boosted or upgraded during our chat,
I honestly had no idea there was a difference, but mine was an upgrade, which I think is better.
No boost. PPS, no need to include this in a code 47. I really just wanted to say,
thank you. The exception is if you'd like to use it an excuse to push FOTs to join. I think you said
you hit 100% though. Congrats! In which case, I will happily share my embarrassment. Wow. We may have
exaggerated when we said we hit 100%. I think we underestimated what happened. We had a great
drive. Thanks to all who supported. My wife and I are in Napa all the time. We'll hit you up.
So Clayton married into the Joseph Phelps wine family. It looks like.
Like, a couple of beautiful bottles.
Yeah, if you don't get into wine, you get into swimming in that family.
Only two paths.
Yeah, I love seeing them out there on the vineyard, getting ready to pick grapes, going.
Yeah.
Two paths in a vineyard, and I took the one that was wet.
Adam, we got some great gifts from the FOTs.
Really did. So generous and thoughtful. Thanks, guys.
And, you know, Archer finds some generous and thoughtful aliens in today's episode.
Doesn't he, though? Wow.
Real helpful guys.
Just a really uplifting, positive episode on deck today.
Something that I know I'll come back and rewatch time and time again when I'm trying to relax.
It's Enterprise Season 3, Episode 19, and it's called Damage.
So we got some confirmation in our last time on,
a thing I think we'd speculated about that to Paul's kind of emotional unease and
dysregulation possibly has something to do with her ongoing exposure to the expanse.
It's like with DePaul, though, she always sort of looks like she cuts her own bangs.
So, like, if she's going through something, you got to, you need other clues is what you need.
But luckily, she's given off those clues, kind of a lot of them.
Especially in the last time on.
Yeah.
We cut back right in the midst of the ship getting hammered.
It kind of felt like they didn't even need the fade to black at the end of the last time on.
They could have just, like, continued with them.
Yeah, fair. I mean, the whole engulfed in flames and blowing people into space level of things, fairly intense.
A real crescendo we arrive at in terms of the bangers here before they just suddenly stop.
I wondered why it was Malcolm Reed's job to give all the damage reports, given that he should be like aiming and shooting at stuff.
Like, wouldn't that occupy, like, your full unbroken attention is, like, trying to fend off the attacking ships?
Is that what his problem's been the whole time, divided attention?
He's got two jobs.
He should have one job, he's two jobs.
That's a problem.
He needs to delegate the reading of the damage systems to someone else so that he can concentrate on the grappling and the shooting of things.
They don't even deploy the grapplers in this.
Like, wouldn't it be fucking sick to see the Enterprise NX-O-1 grab a ship and, like, fling it into another ship and break it in that way?
It would be the best.
It would be amazing.
It would be great if, like, you know, the overcoat that you open up and there's, like, the big boxing glove on a spring that comes out and, like, shoots.
It would be, like, what if you could just shoot your grappler like that?
Like, the grapple part flies off as a projectile.
That's got a payload on the air.
saying. I like that. Maybe the grapple is already holding onto a bomb or something. Yeah, a sticky
bomb. And then you fly off with it. I love this. That would be so cool.
Anyways, the Zindy stopped shooting and the ship is a drift. It's, uh, it is in bad shape. And that is our
cold open. It's a weird feeling of like, you can't retreat the way those guys are over there.
All you can do is drift. And that sucks. Right?
Yeah, it's not like they're much safer.
It's just that they're not in, like, immediate impending danger.
Yeah.
So we get our theme, sign, and when we come back, we're hanging out with some of the Zindy Council,
and the Lizardman is pissed off that Degra ordered the attack stop.
You're permitting an enemy vessel to remain in orbit near a military installation.
Their ship is critically damaged.
They no longer pose a threat.
Degra's explaining, like, you know, we might need them, like, we want their captain to go before the council.
They're talking about, like, we should board and imprison everybody on that ship.
Big disagreements between the Lizardman and the rest of his fellow counselors.
I mean, there's a presumption that Dallum has here that's like Degra superseded my orders.
Like, who the fuck put Degra in charge?
And the council is like, well, we all kind of did, right?
Like, that's how a council works.
And, like, some folks on the council say that they're on Degra's side more or less.
Right.
They also, Dahlum, kind of want to interrogate archer ourselves at this point.
Doesn't seem like you're getting very far with your own interrogation.
Yeah, like beating the answers out of him seems to have only taken you so far.
And maybe we, the council, could do something else.
Like, we saw some of the footage, Dallam, and it actually seems like Archer's just,
talking more and more shit, the harder you beat him?
Like, is that actually some sort of flex I don't understand with the reptiles, Indy?
Like, is that good for you?
Yeah, yeah.
We also didn't love all the polaroids of you, like, you know, with Archer up on a milk crate
in the middle of a room, you know, doing a thumbs up.
There was that weird shot of Dolom, like, with a cigarette in his mouth, like,
like pointing at Archer's face with one hand and a thumbs up with the other.
We did what we were told to do.
I don't feel bad about that.
Pretty casual, Dolom.
Yeah, yeah.
I mean, like, none of your commanders are going to get in trouble,
but the people on the ground, definitely in big trouble for that one.
They really stretch out the teasing of Dolom here.
Like, not in the jockey way we described, but in the,
hey, we want to interrogate Archer, dot, dot, dot, dot.
We want Archer brought to us, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot.
You're probably not the right person to do that given
what we've seen already
why don't we let the aquatics
who have done nothing but
build the entire weapon themselves
on their underwater planet
as if they haven't done enough already
have the aquatics transport
Archer to us
yeah they are going to have that job
Ben at this point what did you think
it would be like on an aquatic ship
like my mind was going crazy about
like so is Archer
in like an air aquarium
inside an aquatic ship?
How is that going to work?
Is this also not the worst type of Zindi to bring Archer to them?
Yeah, I mean...
Like, at least arboreal Zindi would have a ship full of, like, leaves and wheat and stuff, you know?
There would be lots of nanners to eat.
Sure, yeah.
They're not thinking that far.
No.
I was guessing spacesuit or just helmet, you know?
Like helmet at the bottom of an aquarium, like Burbush.
like burbally treasure chest and Archer and a helmet.
And then Archer standing there.
That's not the direction they went.
Do you think in the history of Star Trek Enterprise, were they to make that choice?
Aquatics Indy Transport Archer on their ship.
They make Archer wear like the old-timey diving suit with a...
There's like rainbow-colored pebbles on the floor.
Do you think that is a top three visual in the entire?
series.
Oh.
No one would ever forget that.
Yeah.
That'd be amazing.
The Aquatics Indy,
and I'm going to do the translation
because otherwise it would just sound like
like blu-bub-l-l-l-l-l-l.
Like the Aquatics indie,
you're talking amongst each other.
They're like, okay, well, we downloaded some computer shit
from Enterprise during the attack.
We know how they survive underwater,
and it is primarily some sort of combination
of bubbly treasure chest
and hose-to-metal suit.
He will appreciate
that we have just done the research ourselves,
made things comfortable for him.
Yeah, it's like Mitch Hedberg joke
about putting a leaf in a stick in a jar
to make your butterfly friend feel at home or whatever.
Yeah.
Read into Paul Ketchup in one of the hallways of the entrepreneur
and so many girders have fallen out of the ceiling.
It's a wonder that the ship is even like holding in one shape.
Maybe the most we've ever seen in one scene, right?
Just an absolute murderer's row of girders.
If you're trying to sell a depth of field,
girders foreground to background is what they're doing here.
Yeah.
Pretty solid bit of business.
Does great work.
Ship is very fucked up.
E-deck totally exposed to the hard vacuum.
So there's a cargo bay that DePaul is concerned about not being able to access.
We also learned from Tripp that the warp coil is cooked.
and it would take a long time to fix even if they had the parts, which they don't.
Hey, Tripp, kind of a terrible way to put this.
Like, when Tripp Tucker gives them some crazy timeline depended on parts that they don't have,
not helpful.
Who gives a shit about that timeline?
Unfixable would be the simpler way to say that.
Yeah, yeah.
As it stands down, warp drives out of the question.
Reed fires off a line, like, as they're having this conversation, like,
Shit is just exploding behind them.
Like, it's a fucking naked gun film, and Frank Drebben is, like, telling the press that there's nothing to worry about.
Reed is like, you know, we got a new captain here, gesturing to Jepal.
He's like, let's try not to lose another one in one day.
Yikes, Reed.
Yeah.
Is that a threat?
Just another example of the grasp Reed has on death and near death.
as an experience
Yeah, yeah, weird
Trip asks for more manpower in engineering
which is kind of like intermittently catching on even more fire
as they're having this conversation
And we cut over to the aquatic ship
Where we learn the boring truth
Of how they chose to depict this
Everyone knows you're not supposed to
tap on the glass of an aquatic life form. And what Archer presupposes is maybe using a clenched fist
and just straight up pounding on it is a great way to get an underwater being's attention. This
thing doesn't appreciate that, clearly. He must just push like the knockout gas button.
Yeah. I'm sure every fish that's ever been in an aquarium wish they had like knock out the
the hairless ape that's knocking on my glass. Off screen knockout button.
Wasn't it?
Like, we don't really see what this one's doing.
They used to do that all the time in Star Trek.
Like, someone would just reach just past a panel that you couldn't see,
and you'd just hear like, beep, boop, beep.
Don't need to get the props department involved in creating a button panel for this.
Archer pounds on the window.
This aquatic Zindi swims up.
Archer's like, what the fuck, man?
Where am I?
Aquatic Zindi, like, shits in the water.
Like, like, shets out some sort of am.
Come back to Archer.
He's like,
Ah!
Aquatic Zinny hits the button.
Down goes Archer.
Where are you taking me?
See, this could have been fun.
In a bummer episode,
give us some fucking fun shit.
I'm trying to make damage fun again.
If we change the words,
then it's fair use all day long.
Back on Enterprise,
the repairs continue.
by Reed and ordered by Topal and just then a ship rolls up on them but before they blow it out of
the stars and we need to emphasize this is their first instinct they're like we got to get rid of this
thing right now just before they do that they notice that hey this ship's a little small isn't it
like a one person ship and also it's unarmed to Paul with this information goes let's just go ahead
and bring it on board yeah into the shuttle bay and they crack this thing open guess who's inside it's
Ilar.
Kilar.
Was my mate.
I understand why they didn't do this because it's expensive and bad for a set.
But if they crack open this thing and just a bunch of water poured out, that would have been really funny.
Sorry, we don't have a way to do just, like, gaseous atmosphere in this thing.
Yeah.
Or if Archer himself was wet?
Yeah.
You got to believe they had to pass him through a wet chamber to get him to the escape pod,
which is also in a wet place, right?
Right, it would have had to been.
Just imagine how heavy those uniforms would be
if they were soaked.
Like, this is a uniquely bad Starfleet uniform for that.
Yeah, yeah.
Well, Flax examines him,
and it's mostly superficial, punchy damage
that Archer has sustained.
Don't waste time on me.
It's good to see you again, Captain.
Flax is like, hey, try not to punch another biobed, dude.
Still trying to fix that other one.
It's looking by, like, Ben Harris.
Studio chair
Yeah, he's getting his own damage report
And the ship's damage report
You know, last time he leaves Topal in command, I'm guessing
Just based on how fucked up the ship is
When he comes back
Yeah, kind of a Jordi situation
Happening with Topal here
Yeah
Definitely not in one piece
Thirteen dead
Lots and lots of damage
We're just storing the deads in Six Bay
On the floor in the corner, right?
I think so.
I think they have.
have to, where else would they put them?
You know, they need all the rest of the space to work.
Guess so?
Pile up girders and stuff.
Yeah.
I found it interesting to think about Archer's mindset in this episode through the lens
of he was expecting to be dead at this point.
Like, he goes kind of past Dark Archer, I think, at this point.
Interesting.
Because in not dying, he failed his mission.
He failed to eliminate the threat of the Zindy weapon.
So it's all revenge from here.
Yeah. Kind of feels like that, right?
He does seem different and darker. Absolutely.
And I mean, part of it, part of what really helps sell it is just how dark the ship is.
With all of its damage and its lack of power, like he's never been more dark than this.
I was also surprised that this was DeGra's plan.
Like, why send him back to the entrepreneur?
What does that get the Zindy Council?
Like, they wanted to bring him before the Zindy Council.
Couldn't they get him there?
It's a great question, and I guess the answer that we don't know is that, like,
Degra still needs to keep this a secret, their affiliation is secret,
or that he believes Archer is secret from everyone else.
Yeah, I guess that's true.
So anyways, Archer wants the pod examined and...
And a towel?
Can I get a towel?
because I mean
I don't know if anyone's noticed
I was just on an aquatic ship
I'm very wet
Topal goes to hand him a towel
and she has picked up
a little bit of a tremor
in his absence
and this is treated as like a real
moment but I was also like
I mean the ship was almost
fucking destroyed and a lot of people died
like I think it's excusable
to have a little tremor
like this is a fucking scary shit
they just experienced
It's what makes this moment so interesting for a viewer
And for a long-time viewer of Star Trek
It's like, oh, this really affected our Vulcan crew person
In a way that is kind of like a 10 out of 10
Like if you're going to get a tremor out of a Vulcan
It's probably going to be after a situation like this
Yeah
And I think that's what Archer's feeling in this scene
Like noted, I don't love that
But understood
Yeah
So she leaves and kind of falls apart in the hall
way and she's sort of starting to have a rubber soul outlook on life as she wanders through
the ship and the anamorphic lens twists around on the on the lens mount there's not a lot of
problems that can't be fixed with a little uh sink water splash on your face though she finally
makes it back to recorders yeah and does a little bit of that she is straight in time for the
mcglofflin group issue one in which archer
explains to the crew that the Zindi are not unified, and I mean, he talked to Paul a little bit
about this, like the idea that he may have gotten through to Degra a little bit, and, you know,
they need to fix their ship, but he thinks there may be a diplomatic solution that they can
work their way toward. Their plan is to hide in a dust cloud behind a comet. They're talking
about this when somebody radios up from engineering and warns them that a bunch of
of rocks are about to fall out of the ceiling.
Oh, I hate those things.
They always fall out and hit me on the head when we take damage.
That's pretty fun.
Tripp's like, why don't we keep him up there?
It doesn't make any sense.
I hope a cartoon show eventually explains this.
Well, their non-centrosymmetry disrupts the charged leptons
and the isoliner pathways of the main deflector, which then causes...
I trust you have it in hand.
It's hard to feel comfortable in a meeting when there's the constant danger of panel
explosion right yeah there was also like no everybody okay moment you know that's how you know they're down
bad is there's no there's no show of empathy toward anyone else during this moment it's like all right
next thing yeah it's like when you get into the war zone in a war movie and there's the commander
that's been there for a lot longer and like mortar fire comes in and he like doesn't even flinch when
it goes off 25 feet to his left yeah in a come and see pyreland's trip is like 13 years
old, and this is what he looks like now.
I'm a child.
The ethics of what was done
to me to make this effect on the movie
are deeply troubling.
He wants them to look for the weapon.
He's like, why are we running and hiding?
Like, we're here.
I mean, the answer trip, you fucking dumbass,
is that they aren't really in any position
at the moment to do that.
Sensors are still offline.
Let's focus on getting ourselves operational.
Priority is repair.
Yeah.
Everything else, let's put underneath repair at this point.
Yeah.
I suppose if they could go to warp, they could like kamikaze the ship into the weapon if they could find it.
At this point, you can't take that strategy off the table with Archer.
It feels like everything's in play.
Hoshi and Travis have been given the job of tinkering with the aquapod.
Can I ask you a question about Hoshi?
Mm-hmm.
She is the least dark of all the dark characters.
And I mean in both attitude, but also, like, she's covered in less shit.
Like, she seems uniquely beautiful compared to the other beautiful people on the ship
who have been, like, smudged up and tussled and stuff.
I just thought that was interesting.
Yeah, she doesn't have fallen samurai hair or anything like that.
Her little, like, aside about, like, I should have, like, learned to play an instrument or whatever.
Yeah.
I mean, trip bursts into the room and he's like, yeah, if you were a piano teacher,
in Florida. Oh, never mind. I'll see myself out. Yeah. Travis is optimistic, though. He thinks
that they're going to win this Wawa and see their homes again. That's nice. Yeah, I'd like it a little
better if Hoshi played her Walkman full of Aquatics indie hits, like through headphones, though. I'm
sure Mayweather feels the same in this scene. Almost sounds like music. Yeah. I mean, they're bangers,
obviously, but it's just not the mood
everybody's saying.
Yeah. Over an engineering trip and archer
wonder what side degris is on.
That's still a question.
They hit some switches and fire some stuff up
and that is what that literally does.
It barbecues parts of engineering.
This experiment's all interrupted by Topal
who radios in about a ship in distress in route.
And so they roll up on this ship,
which was damaged by spatial anomalies in the area.
and they invite these folks outboard.
They're talking to them over the radio,
and I was like, that sounds like Degra.
Like, is this some rused by the Zindy?
Not a distinct enough sounding voice.
I thought the same thing.
I mean, it's not until it is.
Like, when we see whose voice it is,
I was like, damn, Casey Biggs has a Degra voice.
Yeah.
We weren't prepared for these spatial anomalies that you call them.
These folks seem like not a threat.
They make it clear right away that they're explorers,
and that's a good sign, right?
They don't even know about the Zindy, and they don't even know about the space insulation you need to make it through this part of space with all the anomalies out there.
These facts come out in such rapid succession.
It just makes it clear that they're like a ship full of deer in the woods full of bears.
They're like there to study this red giant and they have no idea what a sticky wicket they've found themselves in.
They walked into the wrong bar.
Yeah, they really did.
Yeah, they're basically the band in green room in this episode.
Yeah.
Thank you.
That was a cover.
Archer is like, hey, well, so great news.
We have a whole bunch of this Trellium D that you need to shield yourself from the anomalies.
We will trade it to you along with lots of other great technology that you've never even conceived of in exchange for one warp coil.
And Casey Biggs is like, uh, no deal.
I don't want to take three years to get home
We didn't stock up for that
The Illyrians are that sieve
That has like aluminum
And you really want to start making airplanes
But you have no aluminum
On your continent
You're like I will give you anything for aluminum
And they're like nope
I denounce you
Not only do I say no I denounce you
That's what they're gonna do
It's like I'm getting in fucking
diplomatic trouble for asking
What the fuck?
Legally it's just a fart
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I would rather die
I love how this scene plays out
because it builds to this crescendo of like
we really need this
can you give it up Casey Biggs captain
is like nope and then the ship's just part ways
Yeah later
Yeah
Isn't there a moment baked into this scene though
Where you're given enough time to consider
What just happened
And with how you feel about Dark Archer
Up to this point
Do you think Dark Archer would just kill a guy
For that warp coil
At this point I was already
there. Like, this is going to happen.
This is Chekhov's
underpowered alien
vessel, right?
Really is.
Yeah. This is Chekhov's
Casey Biggs. The jangly
keys to distract us from that,
though, is a nude
to Paul in a shower
suddenly getting some
friendly hands on her shoulders.
I did not think about how intentional
that was as a distraction from that
thought. I think it is. Because I was very
distracted here. Yeah, it's distracting. I mean, let's be honest. It's very distracting. At what point
if you're Tripp Tucker, does this become too much? Because I'm going to say, at no point for me,
does this become too much? She turns green. She turns crazy. Yeah. Shit's going wild in the
shower. Bring it on. I might not ever wake up from this.
Whose dream is it? Yeah.
to Paul finally wakes up she's tweaky and sweating and she goes kind of quickly to an EV suit like she knows exactly where she's headed she moves through a damaged part of the ship and finally she gets to that cargo bay that we heard about before that you couldn't get to evidently and this seems like a dangerous place full of wharf barrels and they're like if a barrel could lick its lips seeing someone nearby that is what they are doing when
when DePaul tries to scamper down into the lower part of the hold.
You talk about walking into the wrong bar.
Yeah.
DePaul takes a tumble and her air hose gets knocked out of connection with her helmet.
And there's a scary moment where she's like groping up behind the bulk of her EV suit to get it back attached.
She does and then goes digging in the crates.
You kind of wonder why those air hoses aren't on the front.
Yeah, put them on the front
Or if it was like here
Would it be like blocking too much of your view
And you'd constantly be like looking around
Over the air hose and stuff
Maybe, but counterpoint
Upside for when it gets yanked out
Accidentally, you can plug it back in easily
I suppose when you're when you're scuba diving
You're not bothered by the hose being right there
No, I guess not you can see just fine
Yeah
Dramatic air hose placement is what that is
That's what you need
It's Chekhov's air hose placement
So she finds, like, a crate that's full of space thermoses, and these contain the Trallium D.
And she takes it to a lab, like a chunk of it, to a lab, and turns it into a liquid form, which she then slams.
There's a machine in there with a bunch of cast iron fry pans.
And there's a bunch of trap me.
music being played. There's a clips record in the background that I thought was really cool,
you know, good throwback, you know. The way to Paul slams this into her veins seems practiced.
She has done this before. Ben, when you said Trellium, I wasn't there yet with this. I wasn't sure
that's what this was. You were with it faster than I was. I was because it was blue. It was
established as blue in the episode that introduced it. So Archer in his ready room gets a report
about that escape pod from Hoshi and Travis. They found mainly regular ass shit in its on board
computer, but one document of an aquatic engineer asking a supervisor for something. And
the supervisor's names in the document are the names of Degris children.
So when I saw that, that was a dead giveaway.
Or just like even the secret third child that no one's supposed to know about?
That's weird.
Not even I'm supposed to know that.
They're coordinates embedded in this document.
Coordinates at a time.
So be here at this place at this time.
But we can't make it to that because we don't have a warp coil.
What are we going to do?
Who do we know that's almost as defenseless as us?
and has a warp coil.
When you're Dark Archer,
it doesn't take very long
to have a plan come together,
a dark plan, even.
We need their warp coil.
They won't give it to us,
so we're going to have to take it.
Captain.
Get your men together.
This is the moment
where Dr. Flux brings Porthos back to Archer.
Another moment that demonstrates
how Dark Archer is gone,
a priority to get his dog back,
Not really anything he's thinking about at this point once he lived.
He's just sitting in his totally fucked up office with a girder like crashed across his desk.
You wake me up from a coma or whatever, and if my dog isn't there, you should leave.
You should leave and go bring my dog.
And then I will see you.
They're not allowed in the hospital.
I don't give a fuck.
Then release me from the hospital.
How about Dr. Flax and the way he's lit and shot throughout this entire episode?
I thought this scene was so interesting.
I'm going to put it in quotations, the counsel that he gives Archer here in this moment.
Archer has to admit, he's like, Doc, I'm thinking about doing something super dark.
Dr. Flux is like, I don't know, Archer.
I don't know if that's something you should do.
is flocks the guinen of this show i like that i like that a lot because he's kind of the like
the wise elder that archer can consult in times of great need like this and i wonder how
intentional it was because here's the thing that dr flox does dr flox definitely does not talk
him out of going super dark no and when he does not do that dr flocks's face is also almost entirely
unlit all you can see is uh is like the rim the rim light happening they're gonna do something
that's not strictly speaking super ethical dr flox is like you do something super dark archer you better
just remember one thing which is like what's that lax is like a good supply of body bags
because uh i'm actually kind of running out in six bay i don't know if you notice the row of bodies
there uh zipped in i don't know if it's ethical to reuse those really probably should have brought
like as many as the crew
and then a few extras just based on
the context of the mission.
We're gonna pick up some extra bodies.
Yeah. You know that.
Archer goes to Reed and says
get your buddies ready. We're gonna go steal a
warp coil. And I was like, where?
Get in, nerd! We're gonna go murder
some folks for a warp coil.
I was like, where is Hayes?
Like, where are the Makos?
Why is Reed the only person he's
talking to about this? Because Reed
something to do, I guess.
Fair enough. I'm just hoping we don't keep you quite so busy.
But how about this take by Dominic Keating here? I thought it was so interesting how once he's
told of this plan, he like takes a half step back from Archer in this moment. Like he's physically
moved away and repulsed by this. Yeah. Everybody is horrified by what Archer is doing
going forward, but is going along with it.
It's true.
I have heard that there is a mirror universe, a couple of episodes of this show.
And I'm thinking, like, how would we tell this archer is distinct from that one at this point?
I'm curious, very curious.
Oh, we forgot to talk about this in the last episode when Degger was like, we should talk to her.
Maybe she can do something for us.
And we meet she in this next scene.
She who is the sphere builder.
Yeah.
She's a very heavily loafed lady who is just meeting with the mammal types of Zindy
and is a little bit pissed off about that.
Like she wants the insects and the lizards and the fish to be present.
I won't help fuel your internal bickering.
Yeah, maybe you could wheel in some sort of giant aquarium like you'd get in the lobby of a seafood restaurant.
You know, that would be cool.
I'd like a fresh aquatic Zindy to talk to you guys.
Do you see that a tank that broke at the aquarium of the Pacific on social media?
Like a lobster tank just like broke in the middle of like people going to the aquarium.
Oh, what a bummer.
I know.
Those things are big.
This was like a fucking serious ass fish tank.
Anyways.
This sphere builder really was throwing change leader from DS9 vibe.
So much so for me that I.
I looked it up, I was like, is this Salome Jens?
No, it's Josette DeCarlo, obviously.
Duh.
Yeah.
Of.
You got it.
Without a trace.
She was in an episode of Without a Trace.
Without a Trace.
This sphere builder admits to being involved in the Reptile Zindi Bio-Weapon Time Travel Project,
which is a real mouthful, now that I say it.
I didn't expect her to admit that.
She does that on the one hand, but on the other hand,
she takes great umbrage with what she perceives as an interrogation here,
and she blurps away almost immediately.
Yeah, she's like,
fuck you,
I was doing that to preserve the council.
She's like,
I don't like that you guys and those guys are backbiting
and there's like intrigue.
And it's like,
you fucking started it.
You let them go off on their own secret mission.
Like,
that's the beginning of this,
not them having questions about that.
I kind of like her deal though
because she's like
don't call me again
click yeah yeah
just build your weapon
yeah
but at the end of this
Degra seems to sort of
have emerged
on the team of
Jonathan Archer
maybe she is the enemy
she's never shown us
any like
tangible evidence
that what she's saying is true
and Archer had that challenge coin
and I've got faith
of the far heart
legally
at this point I was thinking about like if Degra's on team archer that would be big
but would he stay on team archer once he learns of the dark archer warp coil raid that has been
planned because like from what we know about this guy he's a big softy he's a big softy that just
builds genocide weapons but yeah I think it'd be really hurt if he learned of some
Illyrians getting their warp coil jacked by a desperate man
we've seen genocide mad characters with hearts of gold before
it's actually kind of a trope on this program
this is not new territory
let's just say
I built traps in my lawn
so that Degra could run
we get another McLaughlin group
issue too about the warp coil raid
and Tripp explains that this is not something you can just beam out of their ship.
We got to go in there and decouple it from their propulsion systems by hand, which could take 10-ish minutes.
Is that because it would do permanent damage to the ship they took it from?
I was trying to figure out why you couldn't just beam it.
And that, to me, seemed to be the case, right?
But that planted the seed in me that this would one day be returned.
Yeah, it seems like they're trying to do this in a way that the Illyrians,
still move at impulse, and that their ship doesn't, like, explode from the extraction.
So, like, there is the idea floated, like, what if we ask?
And Archer's like, I kind of blew it by asking already.
Yeah.
I don't think that's going to work.
I did a bad ask earlier.
There's no second ask after a bad ask.
Yeah.
So we need the element of surprise, not to mention the element of Trellium-D, which we're going
give them lots of along with food. It's going to be like when you steal a candy bar and then you
leave $5 on the counter at the gas station. Yeah. You know. Guess who has a problem with this
to Paul? After this meeting over, she posts games with Archer and she's like, you remember those
marauders that one time that came and stole a bunch of our shit not that long ago? You remember
how bad you felt about that? Well, that's us now. And you know, it's one thing to say that like
the Illyrians can defend themselves
because they have a ship
and that's it
a very slow-moving ship
but like you're leaving them out there with their
pants down just like waiting
for whatever alien out there
wants to come give them a pounding
like it's squishy morality
just because you did not kill them yourself
doesn't mean this isn't tantamount
to killing them by leaving
them like this and
there are lines of morality
and discussions of where they're drawn
and going this far and no further
and falling back and so forth
until finally to Paul breaks her iPad
to make her point.
We don't have a choice.
I won't let you do it!
She thinks he's rationalizing
and he is really shocked
by how emotional she is being.
He's like, you broke your little iPad.
Interesting because her losing control
somewhat undercuts her argument,
even though her argument's pretty sound.
That's very true, yeah.
Yeah, it doesn't emphasize or give punctuation
in a way that she probably had hoped, right?
Yeah, so she goes to Six Bay
in a great deal of distress and reveals to Flox
that she is a total trellium junkie.
Dr. Fox is very surprised that,
she's been shooting it for three months.
Yeah.
And it was a pretty slippery slope, she describes.
The first exposure made her crazy, but then she kind of liked some of the stuff she experienced.
Maybe like micro-dosing it in little bumps would be something to get her by.
And so she did that over and over and over again.
And once access to the cargo bay was cut off, she had to go through some withdrawal symptoms.
And she does not want to go through those again.
she's pretty much at rock bottom here yeah it's a tough feeling if you were to bet on the one
main cast crew person to go through a drug withdrawal at the beginning of this series super duper
long shot is to paul let's do something where we count down from three and say who we think is
most likely to have had that storyline okay three two one read i think i think so yeah
So, yeah, she's totally strung out, and she's like, she's had like a weird interaction with detox that was forced by this cargo bay being out of reach for a while.
And she's realizing that she has become chemically dependent after having nearly died going to get some more trellium.
It's weird how grosser watching Topal grind up a bunch of rocks and shoot them into her neck is from like conventional drug use.
which is just as gross.
Like, it's still rocks and shit.
Right.
It's like no more gross than, like, putting a lighter under a spoon with some H in it and, like, letting it boil and then...
And yet there's something about looking at these rocks.
Yeah.
And, like, watching them go in.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Why is that?
That's weird.
I don't know.
They did a really good job with that.
Yeah.
They're kind of, like, in the middle of this addiction conversation when she gets called to the bridge.
And she's like, this is just between you and me, right, flocks?
And Fox is like, Secret Safe here and...
Just like everything else.
He gives her his giant smile.
She's like, weird time to do that, actually.
Anyways, I'll catch you later, Flox.
And she goes up to the bridge where...
Is my Dr. Flox Charles Bronson?
I feel like it is.
It's like higher Bronson.
Yeah, it is.
It's like happy Bronson.
Yeah.
Happy Bronson.
Yeah.
Now I've heard everything.
They killed my family.
I pledged revenge.
They killed my family, and I, uh, pled revenge.
I used to be a cop.
It means I have a lot of weapons at home.
I could use for this mission.
Anyways, uh...
I kind of want to blow up a bus, kill a bunch of gang members.
I do not care what collateral damage happens in the achievement of my vengeance.
Thomas says as if justice was never important to me in the first place.
So Archer gives to Paul command of the bridge and he goes to head straight into the fray and it's him and some makos and like Casey Biggs is aboard his ship learning of the attack.
when Archer and some Makos beam over and start shooting dudes.
I was a little surprised at the ratio of Mako to regular Starfleet here.
Yeah.
It seemed like they were under Makoed for this mission.
A mission almost tailor-made for Makos.
Such a weird choice.
To the extent where I expected the few Makos on this operation to be looking at each other,
like, ain't this fucking great?
Like, this is why I signed up for this.
Just fucking boarding ships and shooting people.
people. Why any extras not in Mako attire? Yeah, I don't know. Like, I don't know. But this is a fairly
fair fight despite the fact that the entrepreneur would be a much better ship if it was at
its full fighting weight. It's just so goddamn fucked up. They get the propulsion offline on the
Illyrian ship, but they like can't take out the weapons, right? Like their archer's orders are not
to leave them defenseless. So, quote unquote, defenseless.
There's all this like back and forth shooting between the two ships while Tripp and another guy go up to the warp core to try and get it.
The grabbing of the warp coil does not go well.
They expect it to be easy, but that it's surrounded by this force field kind of stalls out the mission in such a way that they get pinned down for a bit and it allows the Illyrians to kind of assemble a counter attack, which really does some damage.
It takes out one of the Makos that they got a beam back, and it's really bad all the way around.
Are these the same kind of Illyrians that Una Chin Riley is from Strange New Worlds, by the way?
I mean, they don't have the same loaf, but they do not.
They do have the same name.
Yeah.
I wonder what that's about.
I don't know.
Yeah, I mean, if they are the same as Una Chin Riley, like not people I would want to piss off.
If they are the same, nothing about the Illyrian background is explicit or implied in the episode whatsoever.
There's this moment where the Illyrians start to fight back and it looks like this whole plan is about to go bad because it's going bad in the ship-to-ship combat and it's going bad in the man-to-man combat.
but to pull comes up with this specific power junction for Reed to shoot ads and he shoots that
thing and it knocks out power all over the ship and Tripp and his buddy get the warp core out
and Archer and the rest of the guys are about to beam out when they run into the Casey Biggs character
who's like man what the fuck like why can't you just take no for an answer and Archer's like
I didn't have a choice.
Anyways, I left $5 on your counter.
It should buy plenty of warp coils.
This moment hits so hard,
because the way you get through to Dark Archer
is through his dark heart.
And Captain Casey Biggs is basically
the friend from Can't Buy Me Love
who's like, you threw shit at my house, man.
You shit on my house!
Flux pays to Paula a visit
in her quarters,
and they have, I like the, like the wall art being a little askew on the wall.
Like, like, archer's quarters are, like, filthy and there's girders everywhere.
Topal's got, like, slightly askew wall art.
There's a girder that is, like, on his desk.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Like, move the one on your desk, man.
You got to move that one.
Otherwise, you're just not getting any work done.
Your work area has got to be clear, right?
Yeah.
Anyways, she's still having a tough time suppressing emotions,
even though she has gotten the trellium monkey off her back
and he's like, well, you know, this will take time.
That's time you could use for some kind of vengeful purpose.
We could explore a dose of trellium methadone.
I really thought Dr. Flax's advice here was interesting
because, you know, so much of what Topala saying here is like her inability to marshal
the power to resist these withdrawal symptoms and these emotions and so forth. And Dr. Flax's
advice is very Buddhist. He's like, observe the feelings. Don't resist them. That's maybe as good
as you can do here. Yeah. In engineering, we learned from Tripp that the Illyrian warp coil was
surprisingly compatible with their systems and they just, you know. I just slid it right in. It was
almost too easy. It was so easy, I pulled it back out and slid it in again, and then I just did that
a few more times. It made its own lubrication. That's nice. They get a deadline here to meet Degra.
They're going to make that deadline because they jump to maximum warp right then and there. And that's
the end of the episode, Ben. Did you like it?
I can't pay. Couldn't belate. Got no case. Tempting fate. There's a moment at the end of this
episode where Archer is
asking himself if they did the right thing
and Tripp is like
trying to reassure him.
What is this fucking saving private
Ryan? What is this horseshit?
Am I a good
captain? Shut the fuck up!
He slaps him.
I think that that's
an interesting question that
not many Starfleet
captains have ever had to
stop and ask themselves. It's
It feels like a Benjamin Sisko kind of moment in a way.
Except he asks it while he's doing bad things.
It's not at the conclusion of the bad thing doing.
Right.
Which is like the normal place to ask whether or not you're a bad person who's done bad things, right?
Yeah.
I mean, he's asking it at the end also.
He's asked it all the way through before, during, and after.
He started five-paragraphed essays, the morally compromising choices.
It's hot.
It's sexy.
but is it okay
and
I mean I think that
Star Trek at its best
gives you tricky moral
conundrums to chew on and like
what would you do's
and I think that
this is a good episode for that reason
like they they did a bad thing
that wasn't up to the standard
they would set for themselves
but they tried to
mitigate how bad it was
at every turn
and give
the stakes, I feel like they did make the right call. The Illyrians are going to be pissed,
but maybe they can patch things up with them. They seem like pretty nice guys, right?
It's really interesting that you came down on right call because I agree, you have to do this.
Yeah. It sucks, but you have to do it. What I don't love is how transparent it feels that
eventually they're going to find this ship and give back their warp coil. Like, I have not watched a head on
a series, but I am positive that's going to happen. We're going to see Casey Biggs again,
and he's going to forgive Archer on screen. You think so. I will throw up if that's what happens.
It better not happen because this is the line crosser. Like, I don't think Archer as a character
can recover from this. And that's fine. Just be who you are, Archer. Be dark Archer from here
on out. You'd be you. You did bad things for the greater good, but like, heavy is the head or whatever.
Like, you're the captain. You've got to make those bad calls. And you have to absorb the grief of
those calls so your crew doesn't have to. That's also another big part of it. Like, everyone is
feeling this in a way that they've not been absolved of, which I think and hope is coming too.
Archer needs to absolve his crew from this and like take it on completely. I agree.
Do you want to see if there's anything morally compromised in the P1 inbox?
You know what there kind of is?
A lot of that, isn't there?
Yeah, I think the Friends of DeSoto are fairly tarnished ethically at this point.
Priority one message from Starfleet coming in on Secured Channel.
You need a supplemental income.
Supplement.
Supplement.
Yeah, it's extra.
The interest alone could be enough to buy this ship.
then we got a promotional priority one message here okay and it is asking us to go to
a e k-k-i-n-c-a-d dot com a e kinkade dot com here's the message i am sending this p1 on behalf of
she who is my wife she is an independent author whoa there is no agent no publisher
No, big book backing her up.
Just a total badass who published a trilogy of funny fantasy books through sheer force of will.
Wow.
Road dropped there.
I like it.
Book one called The Demon, the Hero, and The City of Seven is about an unlikely pair of opposites who get swept up in a quest to save.
their world. They are light, breezy, and touching. I'm so proud of her. Visit A.E. Kincaid to learn more.
Once again, that's A.E.K-I-N-C-A-I-D.com to purchase a great trilogy of funny fantasy books by an indie author.
Hell yeah. I love a spouse supporting their spouse's creative project with a P1. That's such a sweet way to do it.
Yeah. Justin, big spouse, supportive energy here. Good job.
I gotta check out these books.
Got to.
Who couldn't use a light, breezy, and touching book this summer?
It's still summer, right?
I mean, it's like the middle of September, but in L.A., it's still summer.
It'll be summer till January.
Our next P1 is from Loud Shovel, aka Paul Serra, and it's to Nick.
It goes like this.
Nick sent Paul a happy birthday P1 in September, told him about the pod while moving fire
would. Maybe another Nick knows a Paul born in September who also Chuck's wood. What my theory
presupposes is, maybe I'm in the mirror universe? Hmm. It'd explain W-slash-R-T everything and my prior
go-tie choices. Happy B-Day, Paul. Good luck in the prime uni. Here's to Knicks for being
awesome. Pretty great. Pretty great work. I love it. Anyone who calls themselves loud shovel
This is Paul that Nick is talking about makes me think of that you remember that that video.
I think it was a vine where like a shovel gets dropped on a frozen pond once and then a couple of times and then it turns out it's the exact first couple bars of Nirvana's smells like teen spirit.
That's a loud shovel to me.
That's what I thought of.
Yeah, it's good stuff.
Probably means something very different to Paul and Nick though.
Nah.
That's got to be it.
Yeah.
Ben, our final priority one message is from Anthony,
aka Horbert Twast on Discord.
It's to you and me.
Oh.
Here's that message.
Slash fic historically refers to M.M.
Fanfic, so I'm taking the chaotic good route and paying you to read a gay J.C. microfic.
Wow.
And Anthony is using their remaining characters to write that for me to read.
So here goes.
This is going to be the shortest microfic ever.
I love this.
Ready?
Uh-huh.
My body is ready.
Archer shifted his way to pin Tran to his ice desk.
Andoria was cold, but the captain's cock was nevertheless stiffening.
Red Hot.
Wow.
It seems like we've both been losing sleep over each other, the Andorian replied, smirking, and seen.
So when's the reading.
Oh, man.
I love how much that leaves the imagination.
Yeah.
That fucking ice desk is going to melt.
That's my prediction.
You know, it strikes me that the P-1s could be an interesting place to do a little
slash-fick telephone, like, or not telephone, like, where one person writes,
Like a tandem writing project.
Yeah, exactly.
Where we just go and go and go and pass the baton.
Yeah, somebody could pick up where Anthony left off.
We've got some room on upcoming Priority Win messages.
You can continue on where Anthony left off by going to maximum fun.
org slash jumbotron.
Get in there because it is a great way to support the production of our shows.
Sure it is.
Hey, Adam.
What?
Did you find yourself a drunk shimoda?
Incredible.
I think it's going to be Captain Casey Biggs for me.
Okay.
I think Captain Casey Biggs thinks the best he can do is be mean to archer out the door.
But he really could have shot him there, right?
I think so.
Why didn't he shoot him there?
I don't know.
It seemed like they went in with everything on stun, right?
Like maybe there's like a rules of engagement thing to it.
Like, I'm not going to fucking shoot a guy just because he stunned everybody.
here's the thing
when someone comes to take your stuff
and tries to rationalize it out of desperation
that still doesn't get you unshot
in my mind you know
especially if it's the difference
between a three year journey home
and maybe blurping a guy with a phaser
you know yeah
I'm going to get that warp coil back
I'm the captain of the Illyrian ship
that's my job it's not too fucking
moralized to a guy I barely know
yeah yeah
Can you imagine what his crew thinks?
The crew who's around Captain Casey Biggs at that moment sees that happening?
Archer and Mako's beam away and they're like, what the fuck was that, Captain?
They're like, all right, Captain Casey Biggs, you have a drinking problem and it's finally time to admit it and start the long process of healing yourself.
Captain Casey Biggs, you have hurt me in the following ways.
What about you, Ben?
I'm going to give it to the fish, Cindy, who has the knockout gas button.
I just think that's a fun button to have.
Are there other buttons available?
We may never know.
Yeah, we didn't see the reverse shot.
There's a button for clean the water.
That's definitely a button they've got.
Yeah, they're not using it.
No.
Just for having a fun button is why that guy gets it.
I wonder if we will see a fish and he characterized at all,
or if they will just be a guy on the other side of some glass,
like occasionally weighing in on the conversation.
like do they want anything do they need anything what are they up to do they love their children
there's so much we don't know about the fish zindi they probably want some dried food flakes
sprinkled on top of their water from time to time not too much no no no you could totally throw off
the uh nitrate levels oh yeah give them too much and plus they'll just eat and eat like that's
the thing about an aquatic zindi like they will eat past full sometimes you'll see an aquatics indy that
like has been you know taken out of a really big aquatic zindi ship and put it in a much
smaller aquatic zindi ship and you're like ooh it grew too big for the size of ship it's in
and that's just sad yeah it's not good faith of the fart well we got to figure out what we're
watching next week on the show ben for that uh you're going to give us the rundown of what
the episode's about while i head on over to gachdbiz slash game and the next episode is season
three episode 20, The Forgotten.
Two, high-ranking Zindi offer to stop the launch of their super weapon if Archer can prove they've
been manipulated.
Meanwhile, the crew mourns their lost mates.
This is your chance, Ben.
If you called your shot about introducing Aquatic Zindi as main characters, this could be it.
Because we know they built the weapon.
Maybe they have the power to stop it.
Yeah, maybe.
Yeah, maybe they built like a failsafe in.
Yeah. I don't know. Adam, this will not be the first time I've reviewed The Forgotten on a Star Trek podcast.
Really? Yeah. Way, way, way back in the day. When we were very fresh as Star Trek podcasters, I went as a guest on a show called Random Trek, which selects a random Star Trek episode and reviews it with a guest. And I was the guest for season three, episode 20 of Star Trek Enterprise.
prize.
How about that?
Yeah.
So I wonder if I should go back and listen and make sure I only say things that agree with
the things I've already said publicly about this episode.
According to their website, this seems like a podcast that no longer makes episodes.
The last one was in 2024.
Yeah, I think that...
Was that the episode that you were on?
No, I think I was probably on in like 2017.
But yeah, I think the guy that makes it.
still puts one out every so often, but it's not like a primary weekly concern of his.
I see.
Well, a primary weekly concern of mine is how we're going to experience the next episode, Ben.
The Game of Buttholes.
The Will, the Riker, Quantum Leap, is where our runabout is on Square 87.
That's made this a regular old episode, but at the end of this role, we could be anywhere.
Sure could, Adam.
to learn as you play
roll. Here it goes.
Ben, I have rolled
a 57. Okay.
Which means our runabout is on square 44.
Shula!
Did I win? Hardly.
Which also means it is a regular old episode.
Love a regular app.
Mm-hmm. I did it!
I love a friend of DeSoto
who takes it upon themselves to go to
Maximumfund.org slash join
and ensure the ongoing
production of this show
means the world to us
and keeps us going. Keeps us going.
It keeps us from going dark.
I'll tell you that much.
Keeps us regular.
It's like fiber in our system.
Keeps Wendy going.
Keeps our producer employed.
Windy, pretty.
Keeps the show's coming out on time
and super funny.
One of the most crucial members of our team.
We really appreciate all her great efforts.
Got to thank Rob Adler,
our social media director,
It writes our newsletter.
Subscribe to that.
Go to Graystrecht.com for links to sign up to the mailing list.
Go to potchup.
Biz, et cetera.
Got to thank Bill Tilly, our Zindy Wartime, Consiglieri,
our social media director, Emeritus,
who still makes the hilarious trading cards.
Boy, Bill Tilly has been really enfuego lately with the trading cards.
He's really been making me laugh with those lately.
Really great stuff.
If you're not following our social medias and getting the cards every week,
What are you doing?
He also chooses the image that is our show art for that week
and has done so, I think, for all of it.
Since we switch to proper screen grab show art for every episode,
there's a lot of comedy in that selection every time.
And he just does a great job.
Shout out to Bill.
Best in the biz.
I got to thank Adam Roussia with whom we collaborated on our theme music for this show.
and we also collaborate with him on a little podcast called Wholesome
that you can find at patreon.com slash wholesome underscore pod
It's a patron's only show about stuff we like
Get to know us a little better
Stuff that happens behind the paywall stays behind the paywall
So you might hear a little shit talking
About the world that we might not put out on Maine
You know what I'm saying?
Yeah, you're going to love it
Thanks to Dark Materia for the original Picard
song, and with that we will be back at
you next week with another great
episode of Star Trek
Enterprise, episode of the greatest
generation enterprise, where those
fish Zindia are like
not turdating assholes.
That was almost
Zindy Oprah.
You give it a super
wittenden.
Everybody gets a super weapon!
Make it so.
Maximum Fun.
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