The Greatest Generation - He’s A Real Evil Boy (S6E12)
Episode Date: May 17, 2017When the Entrepreneur’s holodeck tries going for a deep callback, the crew is once again facing a villain that can defeat Data. Now a man who should be inside the computer is wandering all over the ...ship and causing all kinds of trouble. Did Q steal that book? Is Picard trying his equivalent of ‘giving the chocolate’ to Moriarty? Who gives Guinan the most hat-envy? Everybody knows that holodeck peril is a snooze-worthy premise. It’s an episode that presupposes, maybe it isn’t?
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Priority 1 message from Starfleet coming in on Secured Channel.
Hey friends of Disodo.
Before today's episode, we just wanted to take a moment to talk about the historic labor
actions being taken by writers and actors in the American Film and Television industry.
If you're a fan of the work done by the people who make Star Trek, we hope you'll join
us in standing in solidarity with the folks who actually bring these adventures to life.
Over the past several years, the AMPTP, the organization that represents the American Film and Television Production
Studios, have reduced the profit from movies and TV going to workers. And in so doing,
they've attempted to weaken the labor unions that represent those workers. They wouldn't
even engage the unions on many issues in their negotiations. And so a strike was the only course of action to take.
Adam, Wendy and I have been having a lot of internal
discussions about how best to stand with the unions
and we are continuing those conversations
in a dynamic situation.
We're doing our best to understand where the picket lines
are in these digital spaces,
and we would never intentionally cross one.
With the information we have,
we feel like we can do more good talking about and supporting
the strike and continuing our show as planned.
We'll keep you informed about what all this means for greatest trek specifically.
Today we're making a contribution to the Entertainment Community Fund.
This fund exists to help all the people whose livelihoods have been put on hold because
the AMPTP refuses to negotiate
in good faith with the unions. It provides financial support for writers, actors, and all the
thousands of laborers who make the shows that we talk about here and without whom we wouldn't
have Star Trek to cast pot about. Those folks are all out of work because billionaires,
company shareholders, and the executives of these companies don't want to compromise on the length of their yachts.
We hope you'll join us in supporting entertainment workers
in a challenging time,
especially after they've already endured
several years of challenges brought on by the pandemic
and season two of Star Trek Picard.
We've set up a page where you can also contribute.
It's at friendsofdecotoforlabor.com.
That's friendsofdecotoforlabor.com. That's friendsofdisotoforlabor.com. Link in the
episode description. Okay, now let's get on with the show.
Here's to the finest crew in a Star Trek podcast by a couple of guys who are a
little bit embarrassed to have a Star Trek podcast.
I am Benjamin R. Harrison.
I'm Adam Pranaka.
Ben you didn't see me do like finger guns on that one, but that's what I was doing.
I heard you do them.
You know sometimes you can hear a smile
over the radio or the phone.
Did you hear my finger guns?
I could hear them waving around in the air.
Pfft.
And it's been a long time since we've done
mutually assured card destruction.
Do you want to?
Oh!
Unberry that bit?
Oh, kind of do.
I get to run downstairs to get them cards though get them cards you've got the con
Oh fuck what do I do
Had to run downstairs to get him. Still very sore from yoga.
I'm restarting my yoga practice and a fun thing happened yesterday with the instructor
was like, you may feel something interesting during this stretch.
And I was like, there is no other place where interesting is code for pain.
Like a yoga studio, right?
No.
Yeah, but if I go unyogged for more than a month, I'm always in pretty bad shape the next day.
Yeah.
But once you've done it twice in a row, you feel pretty indestructible.
Yeah, it's good.
Alright, let's rip into these fuckers.
Alright.
I have to confess that while you were away, I launched one of our previous into space and
hit it with a dozen torpedoes.
Oh!
I didn't know what to do.
You left me with the con.
I can't deal with that kind of responsibility.
We had one to burn. Hahaha. No sigs in this first one.
I've got a cool one for cause and effect.
I got a...
I got Cupid.
Did you get that one yet?
With Wurf in the hat?
I think I do have that one.
It looks like a magazine cover and the biggest story is the issue with hats.
Hey, I got one for the episode we're reviewing today, ship in a bottle.
What? That's never happened.
Yeah, Moriarty standing against a hollow grid.
And I have one for the big goodbye, which is a fun noir depiction of Beverly in the period costume.
Fun!
I'm two packs in, no sigs.
I think I might be diving for a while given that...
What am I three behind, three packs behind in our power ranking?
Yep.
As I recall.
Got one for ethics, the famous warfants to commit Sepaku episode.
Just another day for Mr. Warf.
The dofand, the episode where Wesley gets a hot date, who turns out to be a wear bear?
That was a fun one.
Wesley so unlucky and low.
Poor kid.
Whoa!
I have a limited edition signed card.
Dammit!
By one or tease himself.
Like this is not the foil signature.
This is an actual pen on card signature.
What?
This is a, so like, I know we've both gotten these cards before where there's like,
there's a little bit of an embossment to it and the card is a little thicker than the other card.
I like that for aquil.
Yeah, this is actual like a blue pen ink on suddenly human and it says this limited edition
autograph card was personally signed by Juan Ortiz and the card is J.O.A. 78.
So there must be a whole set of these that have been hand signed. I win again. How many packs of that tick? One, two, three, four packs.
All right, I have three packs open. My third pack has cards for the Royale and second chances that
there's two Commander Rikers episodes, so... Got a total loss.
Yeah, that's a good one.
This is pack 4.
This could at least keep me from slipping if there's something in it.
I love thinking about that Riders Room pitch for the one with two Rikers.
The guy in the corner is like, so we all know Commander Riker is amazing, but what my
story presupposes is, what if there were two? the corners like so we all know Commander Riker is amazing but what my story
presupposes is what if there were two?
Fuck I have another pack of just cards.
Keep diving.
Get Skitzoid Man, fun stylized picture of Wharf and Alexander for new ground.
Alright, pack five.
I mean the good news is I'm getting a lot of packs up.
Gotta get them packs.
Hey, here's a special card.
Hooray!
It is an embossed foil version of the one
our teased signed card for two short a season.
Oh, space Irish.
Yeah, no, that's up to the long letter.
Oh, which one is this?
Uh, this is the one with
Admiral Jamison, the guy that's like the aging himself
One of the greats. Yeah
Some of the some of the worst loaf in the history of loaf. It's real Hall of Fame loaf right there
Yeah, people have asked us what we're gonna do when next gen is over, if we're gonna do any special episodes where like maybe we do our awards episode.
Yeah, we look back on the series.
I feel like a low-follow fame is a great segment for that.
Yeah, I don't hate the idea of doing like a retrospective episode before we move on to
holes in space etc.
We've already done Clip Show. It doesn't get any worse than that.
A word show is far far better I would say.
So I have slipped to four packs behind. It's really a game.
It's going to be a pure game, right?
Because we probably have roughly the same number of special cards in each box.
Yeah, it's just the degree.
It's how we judge each other's special cards.
Like one of us could get a real barn burner.
Yeah, I mean, if there's a jeager in there.
If you pull a weapon...
Okay, hang it up a
Whippy is gonna destroy me. Yeah, I'd say that it's a would you say that
Whoopee is the is the is the you know ace of spades and I
Would say pulling a whoopee is like the 1989 upper deck kangarooey Jr. card. Like, that is-
Is that the one where he shits in the toilet tank?
Friend, I don't know what you're talking about.
It's the Billy Ripkin, fuck boy.
Card.
God, we're way in the weeds now.
Oh, we're doomed.
How is this one going to go, Ben?
I say we just move right on to our episode.
Well, we got a real doozy here, Ben, at Season 6, episode 12.
Ship in a bottle. It's another great playing holiday episode, isn't it, Ben?
Data in Jordy, hanging out at Holmes' apartments in Baker Street.
Their captain has spent some time being tortured.
Two of his closest friends decide to just go play
holodeck instead of being his friend.
Be by his side.
Yeah.
Do whatever they can to help him recover from his ordeal.
He'll be fine.
And our deal that never leaves anyone unscored.
Yeah.
Um, yeah, they're they're having they're having a laugh in
the holodeck and the character that they're about to accuse
of murdering his brother catches some object with his right hand.
And data is like, ah-ha, you're left-handed.
And Jordy's like, hey, data, don't look now, but you're shitting on your own point.
And they just kind of like go off into,
like they drop their ridiculous accents
and go off into techno babble,
like something is clearly wrong with the holodeck.
There seems to be a problem
with the holodeck spatial orientation systems.
London's greatest detective. There seems to be a problem with the holodex spatial orientation systems.
London's greatest detective! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha So we got to play with the holiday to figure out what's happening. I mean, I think that they were doing, you know, like they were,
they were playing duck hunt and then it started glitching out and they pulled the
cartridge and tried blowing on it through their t-shirt.
To me, it felt like they were like two hot tub repairmen who could only test out
if the bubbles worked by getting in the hot tub, you know?
Jordy's like the butt jet isn't bubbling the way it should. These pipes have been so serious for years!
It must have been a non-union job.
God, they leave so much back hair every time they test it out.
It's really gross.
Good thing they got Barkley though.
Barkley...
These guys have the greatest thing in the world which is they call up tech support and tech support is like there as they're leaving
There must have been a glitch in the matrix diodes
I thought Barkley would be banned from the holodeck and I think he was because that's the only explanation for how excited
He is to be back on a holodeck inside an arch again. Oh
he is to be back on a holodeck inside an arch again. Oh, ho, ho, Reg.
I'm sorry, Commander, I'm just on my way to the holodeck.
I mean, dude definitely sounds like he was jerking it
when they call him up.
Yeah.
Do you know what I mean?
Do you know what I mean?
Do you know what I mean?
R-slash deck.
Is what he's been looking at.
That takes him right over the line.
Yeah.
R-slash deck in 15 seconds.
He sort of has like a futuristic tongue depressor.
Like, that's what he's rolled into the holodeck with to fix this thing.
Yeah, I mean, he doesn't need much. His hair is much better now.
Yeah, I guess. To who?
He starts like poking around and he narrows the problem down to Sherlock Holmes stuff
and discovers that there's a big thing running in protected memory and he launches it
and out in the center of the holodeck appears Professor Moriarty, the same actor and character from the episode Elementary Dear Data.
A deep callback.
A four-season callback, which is shocking.
They don't talk about things that happened in the episode before.
It's incredible.
Yeah, they are willing to call back this holodeck character,
but not the fact that Picard has just been subject
to torture.
Morey Artie is like, I've been in that fucking
isolinear chip for four years, and it's kind of freaking me out.
Where are we out on the mission? W slash R slash T.
Making me a real sentient person. And I want to leave the holodeck.
I want to leave it right now.
Barkley's like, I don't know what the fuck you're talking about, man.
And Mordy Arty is justifiably pissed about this.
I have been stored in memory for God knows how long
and no one has given me a second thought.
Yeah, Moriarty should have been like,
hey guy, you were the entire computer for a while.
You lived in the holodic.
You know every inch of this computer system,
you should know what I am.
If there's one guy who knows what Moriarty's been through,
it's actually Scotty, who is stuck in that transporter buffer.
Yeah. Moriart already seems fine, though,
other than being a little pissed.
He's like, I need to see the captain.
I need to lecture him on this part of his performance evaluation.
This shit is horrifying, right?
Like, to be trapped in there for four years
without any way to interact with the outside world?
Yeah. Yeah. Kind of a lot's happened for four years without any way to interact with the outside world.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Kind of a lot's happened in four years.
Picard shows up with the action jacket.
Moriarty's like, what the hell is that?
Picard is like, hey, listen dude, like I want to tell you all about my action jacket, but
we've got some planets that are about to bump into each other.
And I'm much more interested in that.
And I assure you that people who know what they're doing
are looking into your case.
And I'm sorry that you were awake the entire time.
But I don't know what to say.
You're still a holodeck guy.
There's nothing I can do about that.
He kind of gives him the whole,
we realize you have your choice in Holodex.
And we thank you for choosing Enterprise Holodex.
Yeah, he's not, he's not like,
sir, we oversold this Holodex
and we need you to leave right now.
Moriarty is like check listing him a little bit.
He's like, well, didn't you elevate this problem
to tech support like outside of Barclay? And Picard's like, yeah, like Starfleet
set up a whole holotic lab with nothing but snowballs and books.
The God is working in shoes!
They just can't figure this thing out. And that is like deeply unsatisfying. In the way that it always is when you call tech support
and they don't have a way to like turn a knob
and your problem is fixed.
Yeah.
Make it sound.
Make it sound.
Make it sound.
Make it sound.
Make it sound.
Make it sound.
Make it sound.
Make it sound.
He feels very urgently that he has to get off this holiday.
One thing we neglected to mention was that when Barkley agreed to go get the captain,
he flipped a switch and Moriarty disappeared.
But the second Barkley left the room, Moriarty reappeared foreshadowing that he has some level
of control over his existence that is
here too for unestablished. And so, as this argument with Picard boils over, he's like,
he's like, hey, asshole, like, I'm going to show you how wrong you are about this whole situation.
I am aware of myself and what I am in my surroundings. Cogetoegosum. And I think that by sheer force of will, I can step off this holodeck and
maintain my matter cohesion or whatever. And he walks over to the door and sure enough, he steps
into the hallway and does not disappear. Sort of a heavy moment.
Because he knows the stakes, Picard has told him the stakes.
You're going to walk outside that door, and you're just going to vaporize like this book.
Yeah.
Like if only you were a snowball, you would survive outside the holodeck.
Wasn't it the Dixon Hill episode where there were some gangsters that walk out of the holodeck and they sort of like disappear by fading up from the floor.
Yeah, yeah, so we've seen it before. We know the stakes.
Yeah, I was wondering why the book behaved so differently.
I don't know. It sort of cue flashes out of
out of frame, maybe queues stole it. Well anyways, Mario already walks off and everybody is fucking shocked, like they cannot
believe their eyes.
Like data like almost has a spasm.
What do you see this?
Yeah, because this is new life, right?
New civilizations.
He has just basically announced to the universe that he is real.
I'm real, baby. He's done the Pinocchio transition, right? He has just basically announced to the universe that he is real.
I'm real, baby.
He's done the Pinocchio transition, right?
He's a real boy.
He's a real evil boy.
A real evil boy.
Yeah, and so I think they go to Six Bay and the doctor does try-order on him and she's like, yeah, he's weird, but he's real.
And he starts asking questions.
He's like, you know, like, where, what ocean is this ship in?
Like, let's go, let's go up to the deck and take in the breeze.
And Picard is like, oh, I actually need to, I need to break something to you, buddy.
And does the classic Picard trick of taking somebody to a window to show them out?
Yeah, which is normally...
What's happening outside the ship?
It's normally like a seduction technique for him.
This is one of the few times you see him do it towards someone he's not sexually interested
in.
Yeah.
He does not want to bang Moriarty.
And so like, they sit down and Moriarty's like,
okay, I'm out of there.
Now you gotta get my girlfriend out of there
and you gotta let us go.
Like, this is inhumane.
What has happened to me is unacceptable
and you guys were totally asleep
at the switch the entire time.
It's not cool.
They build up the idea of this love interest
over a couple of scenes.
Like initially Moriarty is like,
God, I love this girl so much.
She was designed to be the love of my life.
I think my mission is really to spring her
from the holiday prison too,
because like it's great that I'm alive,
but what I really, like it's not gonna mean much to me
if I'm by myself. Like I really like it's not gonna mean much to me if I'm by myself
Like I want to I want to get my lady friend out so we can start living this life
I love that Picard is like
You know making one super villain real is one thing
Like actively making a second super villain real seems like a big problem and more here. He's like no
No, she's just regular. She's not a super villain at all.
There's so much build up to her before we see her that I, I mean, I knew this wasn't going
to happen because I started to remember this episode fairly quickly, but do you think they
ever considered bringing a Polasky back? Because they really hit it off. Moriart considered bringing Polasky back?
Because they really hit it off.
Moriarty and Polasky did back in the day.
And if his love interest...
Was like modeled off of her?
Was modeled off of her?
That would have been an awesome call back.
Yeah, or minuet for that matter.
Either one would have been pretty cool.
Yeah.
I mean, we're not knocking the actress who ends up playing the Countess, but...
No, she does great.
Yeah, but boy, like, to bring back
a very salty Polasky would be fantastic.
You know what hit me while I was watching this episode
about Moriarty?
What's that been?
He's the captain that Admiral Fred Thompson is bossing around in hunt for red October.
Whoa!
Yeah.
He's like, I don't like that guy wearing that uniform.
Good call.
Cut the boys' slag, Jimmy.
I just felt the need to work that in there.
He fell out of a helicopter and be it NAM.
He was a marine.
Let me tell you something Ben.
Fred is always welcome on our show.
Are you allowed to wear a Navy uniform if you used to be a marine and are now attached
to the CIA?
Is that make it less bad for that captain?
I don't know.
Or is he still like this fucking sucks? That's uh...
Because Admiral Greer is the one that put him in it. He says this is Greer's idea of low profile.
Will you get to save that for a different pod, Ben? Yeah, maybe uh... maybe our next max
fun drive we uh... we put a red October back on the list as a potential bonus app.
That is agreeable to me.
Picard agrees to move with all deliberate speed
on getting Moriarty's sweet, sweet girlfriend for the holodeck and heads up to the bridge to attend to planet crash. The ship is in
this system because there are two gas giants that are gonna bump into each
other and potentially go go nuclear and like form a new star. So it's gonna be a
pretty exciting event.
And they're an a rare one.
So they're really excited to observe it.
And Picard is like, all right, let's
send some probes out there.
Look at these nice giant globes.
Those are some big sexy globes.
And now when you're making a new star, you're gonna wanna take two large gas giants and then
smash them together.
Real hard.
We recommend using a lot of support with two large gas giants.
They can cause low back problems if you are not supporting them properly.
We recommend measuring both cup size and strap size.
Now once they start banging into each other, you can't want to get a safe distance.
We recommend a half a light year.
That way when they form a new trance style, stashhip will be in danger of sure destruction.
You safety goggles at all times.
And whatever you do, do not let a malevolent being from the holodeck take over your ship.
Man, that was a complicated one, Adam.
It incorporated real things from the episode and also boob jokes,
which have never touched the good folks at this old house a single time.
You know, once we start sexualizing this old house, you know we will have come full circle
on that bit. You know it's ready. Didn't we just add them? Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
They're getting ready to launch some probes
at these globes.
But you know, some people are into, some people not.
Five probes is more probes than typically I could take.
In a globe banging situation.
Yeah, wharf is like, I'm going to spray probes all over these
globes and he hits the button and nothing happens. It's very anticlimactic.
Yeah. It happens to everyone, Wurf, from time to time.
Don't feel ashamed. You know, sometimes it's when we realize our most
exciting fantasies that we get a little
stage fright, Worf.
Too much pressure.
Turns out Worf, not a Globesman.
He's more of a Bunsman.
He likes the Cragley teeth.
Oh yeah.
He made a special exception for his parma-kai, didn't he?
They can't launch these probes and data is like, hey, the command codes have all been
rerouted.
That's no good.
Yeah, and everyone sort of looks at data.
When command codes are rerouted, I think suspect number one is data.
Yeah, they're like, un-re-rout them data.
And on to the bridge, Saunter's Moriarty.
And he's like, hey guys, got your ship.
You guys looking for this?
Ship your own nice ship you got here.
It'd be a shame if anything happened to it.
And Picard is like, dude, you don't understand those globes need probes on them.
Like, we got to finish the understand. Those globes need probes on them.
We've got to finish the job.
We're in danger.
And he's like, well, maybe that is just the kind
of motivation you'll need to help me with my problem.
Yeah.
And so they're fucked.
Like the ship is under his control.
They have a great scene, Dan, in engineering where it's like
Jority and Barclay and Data doing like what every nerd
sitting around in the living room with their friends does,
which is trying to head cannon,
how the deck versus transporter.
Yeah.
It's so fun.
I wonder what would happen if we tried to beam a hollow deck object off the grid.
Please, I wanted to hear mindless droning, I'd be friend and air conditioning.
It delivers on this in the way that like Batman vs Superman fails to deliver on that nerd
head cannon, like what would happen.
Like, this is great. Like they they work out a reason why you can't beam
something off off the holodeck. And that's something that I'm sure. Can you imagine the
fucking stack of letters that she received over the course of its now six and a half years
on television for people wondering why that has never been tried.
I feel like they needed six and a half years
to come up with a reason.
Like it wouldn't have surprised me
if they used all six and a half years to detail this.
Yeah, it's fun.
Yeah, but like, you know what,
even in a non-specific way,
I like seeing them work out a problem like this.
Yeah.
Like, they actually go through a few iterations of why before resting on their conclusion.
It's great.
It's scientists doing science.
And they have, they've come up with a hypothesis and they don't know if it's going to work,
so they're going to test it.
So data and redge wander down
to the holodeck with some jumbo crayons and redge goes in and he's going to try and
set them up around a chair and see if they can be much air off the holodeck. And when
he goes into the room, the Countess Regina is who is a Moriarty's girlfriend, is in there.
Have you come to see Mr. Holmes or perhaps Professor Moriarty?
You knew him!
She's got a big floppy hat. She's got like a guinein-sized hat.
It may even be bigger than a guinein hat. It's massive and it's got feathers.
You think guinein has real hat envy in this situation.
Yeah, she would have to.
And she is great.
She is as a character like smart and quick and charming.
And the interaction.
She's definitely not like a damsel in distress.
She has like real agency and is not just girl-mortiarty but a like a real interesting foil for his character.
This scene I think is my favorite scene in the whole episode because you get barkly in there
to do a job and I think no matter what your job is this has happened to you before but you're like
there to do a thing and you run into a person that you've got to help while doing this thing and you just
hit it off, right?
You hit it off and you are charmed by them in a really fun way.
And the interaction between the Countess and Barkley, she totally just melts him in the
best way.
Like, he sees her with Moriarty together,
and then she's alone with Barclay,
and he sort of breaks multiple times.
His stoicism and professionalism are just sort of cracking,
and he can't help but be charmed by her.
Traveling the stars.
You know about that?
She has been let in on the secret by Moriarty.
So she's aware that she is a character in simulation
and that this is an attempt to bring her and Moriarty
into the real world, or I guess just her
into the real world.
Do you remember the last time we got,
well, I guess it maybe wasn't even the last time, but you've
remembered moments in this show where they've written characters out of time that
have experienced the future. I'm talking about of course $5 carnival guitar
guy. Let's see if the braves are on. How do you cut on this TV? Isn't it great
that they wrote the countess in a smart reasonable way?
She's not pie-eyed and googly about her circumstances.
She's smart and reasonable.
She's smart and reasonable, and yet she has this kind of Victorian bearing
that she maintains in spite of everything.
And it's really fun to watch that kind of play out in all the different contexts where she's a...
It's a good combination.
Yeah, it's real fun stuff.
It is not, you know, what did you call it?
Victorian bearing?
Yeah.
Boy, isn't there a difference between that
and like, country general Lee bearing?
You know?
Indeed, Adam. I am the cutest of all. You know?
Indeed, Adam.
They try to beam this chair off the holodeck and it does not
materialize on the pad.
And that is not good news.
So data like wanders down to engineering too. I guess he's just going
to gab with Jordi about it, but what he finds when he gets there is Captain Picard giving
Jordi the command codes to try and re-initialize the ship and it doesn't work. Like he doesn't,
like Jordi has been working on like back-ddoring Picard back into command after Moriarty
took them out of it.
And data shows up like a minute too late to prevent Picard from doing this.
But what he does do is toss something to Jordy, which Jordy catches with his left hand,
which mimics the glitch that they observe in their cold open.
And so data puts it together that they've been in a simulation the entire time.
None of this is real.
They never left the holodeck after the first time they went in.
The more you already character walking out the door was not walking out of the actual holodeck door.
He was walking into a simulated enterprise of his own design.
Which is like, they've been accepted, basically.
This is Star Trek Inception,
and it's a sophistication in storytelling
that you didn't think they were capable of.
At least I didn't think.
Like wow.
It's a real like mind blowing twist.
I love how they treat fake Jordy here.
They're like, Jordy, why don't you go do some work
or whatever and Jordy walks behind a curtain?
Yeah.
He's like, all right, bye.
What is he doing back there?
I was really hoping for fake Jordy to be like,
what, I'm not real, like for him to suddenly get sentience
the way that Moriarty did.
How big of a problem would that have been if the fake
enterprise crew members suddenly felt like they were alive
in the same way that Moriarty did?
Right, well, I mean, it's fun because like,
Jordi behaves the way holiday characters do behave
when you start talking about Holodeck
characters.
This doesn't look like anything to me.
They sort of default to that.
They kind of reestablished that a bit in the cold open.
It's really fun to see one of our characters doing that.
Yeah, real fun.
Now we go to outside the Holodeck for the first time since this has been going on and it's like
Riker and Jordy
Negotiating on FaceTime with Moriarty like a hostage situation. Things are not what they seem Chris
Picard data and Barclay are in the holodeck in
Communicato, as far as they know, unaware of what's going on.
And Breaker is trying to convince Moriarty to break the lock and let them out.
Release control of this ship. And they're fucked because now Moriarty has
Captain Picard's command code.
It's hard to tell who's more dangerous with those codes. Moriarty or data.
Yeah. It's hard to tell who's more dangerous with those codes. Moriarty or data Yeah
Because like at least data you could like physically restrain, right?
Yeah, there's no like there's nothing there with Moriarty. He can disappear into any part of the ship
Yeah, I thought it was an interesting choice to in the cut back and forth between
It was an interesting choice to, in the cut back and forth, between hollow enterprise and real enterprise. I wonder if at any point they had thought to materially change, you know, either how it was
lensed or how it was colored in a way that made the distinction more apt because, you know,
like in the matrix, you can tell that the matrix is the Matrix because there's that green cast to it.
And the real life has a different cast, but...
A little bluer.
Welcome to the real world.
I appreciated the amount of trust the show gave the viewer
in figuring that out and cutting back and forth.
Like, it looks materially the same,
in a way that can at times be confusing.
But the confusion helps serve the story, which is also good.
It's perfectly done.
Yeah.
It's flawless.
And so like the complication now is that the stakes have been raised because
Moriarty has the command codes, but you know, conversely, Picard and data and Berkeley are aware of the
predicament they're in and so they're working to get out of it from the
other side of the holodeck door. They're digging from opposite ends of the tunnel
basically. Yeah yeah they're trying to meet in the middle.
So Picard goes to the Countess and is like, listen, you know, I want to help you and like I think we probably can, but I have a lot of responsibility here.
There's a thousand people that could die if your boyfriend
continues down this path.
I'm going to get you guys out of here, but only after he
relinquishes control of the ship to me.
And she's like, that doesn't sound so much like a compromise
as a threat.
So what the deal?
And he's like, well, that's like my best offer.
So she explains this to Moriarty.
And like, his mind immediately makes this a, like, this is perfect.
I have them running around like rats can amaze.
Now I have all the leverage I need to get this done.
And so what he's done is explained to Riker
that the theory here inside the holodeck
is do something with the Heisenberg commentators.
And so Riker, I guess this is maybe a little thin,
but somehow worked in the episode.
That's like enough for Riker to work out what to do,
which is that they beam
Moriarty and the Countess out of the simulated world into the simulated enterprise.
Like they think they're being beamed from the Baker Street apartment to the real
enterprise, but they are being beamed to the simulated enterprise and they're put in a shuttlecraft and sent
on their way and it turns out that that is all a ruse.
They get the Scotty deal.
They do, yeah.
They get a sweet previa all to themselves.
One of the big ones.
Yeah.
The family trexter.
Wow.
This is Roomy.
the family trexter. Wow, this is Roomy.
I thought that this maybe it was like one area that
wrote Moriarty a little dumber than he probably would have been.
And I don't really know, I don't have a solution to this, but I sort of think that he would
have been checking in with his reality frequently given the the con he was running?
Well, that's what Inception does so well with the top is like, how do you know where you are,
for sure, and what this episode needed was a top. It did. Some sort of top device that told
Moriarty or at least communicated to the viewer that Moriarty knew or did not know where he was.
or at least communicated to the viewer that Mori already knew or did not know where he was.
And it seems a little bit thin
that they were able to turn the exact table back on him
in a way that they were originally turned to them.
Like, I don't think that it fails.
I don't think this episode is ruined by that,
but it does like enter your head
and bump you a little bit.
Yeah. by that, but it does like enter your head and bump you a little bit.
Yeah. So the button on the episode is
a barkly pulling the chip that the simulation continues to run with.
They have a little meeting in the conference room to talk about it.
And Picard sort of says with some amount of wonderment that,
you know, this thing can run forever. The simulation can run forever.
They'll never know that it's not real.
They've got sort of a battery and jumper cables hooked up to it so that if the power goes
out, like they won't lose the thing.
It's so macabre.
It's, there's a little bit of a twilight zone ending to this.
Like, it is, It is also tragic.
It is not a great ending.
It is not a bad ending, but he's in prison, and he doesn't know it.
And is that okay?
He's no less alive than he was at the beginning of the episode.
They agreed that he was alive. It seems like it flies in the face of the morality of these people.
Exactly. Exactly. I don't think he deserves to be on someone's desk.
Where do they put that thing? Do they give it to the scientists that are working on
the bring this kind of reality? They also treat Moriarty like he is,
he's so reflexively villainous
that he's too dangerous to be allowed into our world
even if we could find a way,
which I feel like is a pretty debatable premise.
Like, you know, I feel like I could be convinced,
but I don't understand where they're coming from with that.
It's, I mean, they double crossed him and they left him alive. It's the con problem.
You know, like you can't maroon him on setty alpha six.
This is setty alpha five!
And expect him to just stay there, like someone's gonna boot up this program down the line.
And there's gonna be hell to pay when it happens, right?
You should have been a fun movie.
Right?
I agree.
Did you like this episode, Adam?
I did.
Fun episode.
And a challenging premise to make right in 42 minutes, you know?
Like, it was cheesecake minutes, you know? Like, it was cheesecake dense.
You know, there was a lot of story making to do here.
And that is the thing that it really,
like for all of inception's like two and a half hours
or whatever, like, I feel like you get 90% of the fun
of that in this and it's
less than half as long Right because the whole thing falls apart if you don't know the rules to this game and they're able to
Establish really quickly what those rules are in a really efficient manner and if they're unable to do that at any point
I don't think the episode works. Yeah. I also really like this episode.
I think that it's not uncommon for
Holodic peril to be a real
a real snooze on this show.
Yeah.
And this is an example of it
done very well.
Some of the best remastering on the show
were these two globes bangin'
Pretty hot bangin' I thought. Yeah. Look good.
It's a big, it's a big globes. I mean, made me want to produce a probe or two of my own.
Speaking of probes, Ben, has anyone sent any probes to us in our general area?
Hmm, let's see what is due for our chins, Adam.
Priority one message from Starfleet coming in on Secured Channel.
Need a supplement, Adam.
supplement, supplement.
supplement.
supplement.
Yes, extra.
The interest alone could be enough to buy this ship.
Adam, we have a couple of priority on messages here. Our first one is from Steve, John, and Matilda. Mr. Katie. It goes like this. Thanks for being a great mom. When the rascals are old enough to
view this podcast, they will be much more thankful than they are now that they've never been trapped in a turbo lift singing Frerazhaka or stranded in a desert doing a school run. And until
then, we all love you. Didn't hope that this is the best Mother's Day. Better than all
days. Everywhere. I already had money to sleep. Well, that's a fun one.
Happy Mother's Day, Kay.
Happy Mother's Day and all the mothers in the crowd.
I feel like we got plenty of moms out there.
A lot of people say that Mother's Day is a home arc holiday.
And that's one of those people. You will find my real-dollar creations.
Come in all shapes, sizes and ages.
In many ways I feel like a mother myself, because without me, they wouldn't exist.
So in some ways, this is a day of celebration for me as well.
Happy measures day to me.
Do we have another one Adam?
We sure do.
Bend the semesters from Steven Theaker.
And it is for Ranjna Theaker.
And I really hope I pronounce that right.
Message goes like this.
25 years ago we started watching Star Trek the next generation together in the student
common room at Reading University, and I'm so looking forward to saying hello to Jason
Isaacs with you when the new series starts.
You're my number one, and always will be.
Happy 21st anniversary!
PSU would love this podcast
Steven you just you just sent this message out into the ether hoping hoping that it would find
Your wife wow. I hope that the I hope that the plan isn't like a clockwork orange forced viewing of this podcast
I hope that the plan isn't like a clockwork orange forced viewing of this podcast.
Because by the time you get here, man, you have to listen to a lot of probes on Globes jokes.
That hot probes on Globes action. Wow slash JemboTron to order one.
It's a hundred bucks for a personal message and 200 for a commercial message.
And we really appreciate everybody who sends them. So thanks!
Thanks!
A greatest-gen live show is something you don't want to miss. Why?
Well, it's a great opportunity to see me and Ben in person, but that's not all.
FODs from all over gather at these shows to cosplay, to do pre and post-show hangs, to make
friends, and share their embarrassment.
Hey, let's make a pretty great name for a tour.
Let's do it!
The Sherry Reembarishment Tour is coming in August 2023, and we've got a bunch of dates
in a lot of great places.
Go to GreatestGenTour.com to get more info.
That's greatestgentour.com for dates and ticketing information
for the Share Your Embarrassment Tour.
I'm Jordan Morris.
And I'm Jesse Thorne.
On Jordan Jesse Go, we make pure, delightful nonsense.
We were open awesome guests and bring them down to our level.
We get stupid with Judy Greer. My friend Molly and I call it having the spaceweirds.
Pat Noswald.
Could I get a Balrog burger and some air-gorn fries? Thank you.
And Kumail Nanjiani.
I've come back with cat toothbrushes, which is impossible to use.
Come get stupider with us at MaximumFun.org.
Look, your podcast apps already open, just pull it out. Give Jordan Jesse Goatry.
Being smart is hard, be dumb instead.
Oh, rats, hey, hey, hey, oh, I'm about to count you in mine.
These clouds are really freaking me out.
I hate having to stand in line and boy, what do I?
These giraffes do not smell good.
No, they do not, and they've such short nacks.
But I'm hearing we need to get on this arc.
We've got to get on the arc.
It is about terrain, about us about to destroy humanity. Hey, oh, sorry, not, and they've such short nests. But I'm hearing we need to get on this arc. We've got to get on the arc. It is about terrain, about a spout to destroy humanity.
Hey, oh, sorry, sorry, sorry.
Are you Noah?
Yeah, I know we look like humans.
We're actually, we're podcasters.
We are podcasters, so it's different.
Have you heard of Ono Ross and Carrie?
We investigate spirituality, claims of the paranormal,
stuff like that.
And you have a boat and say the world's gonna end,
so seem like something for us to check out.
We would love to be on the boats. We came to by two. What do you think?
Oh, no Ross and Kerry available on maximumfund.org
Hey, Ben. What's that Adam? Did you find yourself a drunk Shimoda?
I did. I'm going to give mine to a wordless security guy.
At one point, there's a cut down to wharf in the hallway with some lackeys and they're
trying to bust through the holodeck door.
And there's just a guy in the foreground with like an electronic pen.
And he's touching it to different points
on the force field that's keeping them out of the hallway.
I don't know, it just made me laugh
because I love the idea that he tried one place
and he's like, well, let me see if there's a hole over here.
Nope, this is also a force field.
How about here?
Nope, still a force field.
Ben, this is a double Shimoda because I chose the same guy.
He's totally asked to mine, right? He's sort of mimeing with a
chapstick. He's doing the box.
He sure is. He's trapped in this box, Ben.
And the one guy that they send to break down the door is the
wrongest guy for this job. Like, Warfleet the team to open up this door
is sort of a terrible order to give.
They should know that.
A cruel, cruel irony.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Get Shimoda.
Yeah.
You too, buddy.
What do we have coming up on the next episode, Ben?
The next episode of the show is season six, episode 13,
a Quille. Next episode of the show is season six, episode 13. A quiel.
Jordi is enamored with a beautiful and mysterious
Starfleet Lieutenant accused of murder.
Do you remember this episode, Adam?
Jordi LeForge always falls for the wrong woman.
Okay.
Jordi, you can't love me.
I've been accused of murder.
The first gold, one or teased signed card I have
is from Aquiel.
Is this person a robot person that Jordy falls in love with?
No, I think she's like a real babe, but she, uh,
is she like not around?
How is she in the Globes department?
Adam, in a probe.
Jordy's not a Globes man, I think we all know that.
He's a...he's a...he's a Kelzone man.
Yeah, yeah, big into those Kelzones.
Stuff that crust, Jordy.
We're turning into assholes, Anifold.
Like this.
Cut that out.
Cut it all out.
Yeah, you know what?
This is one of the episodes that people warned us about when we vetoed
rascals or I should say when I vetoed rascals, they're like, you guys,
Akkwi, El's coming up.
You're not going to make this episode, I thought.
Well, am I wrong? Am I misremembering? I would never say you're wrong on this program, Ben,
until the mics turn off. So I guess we'll find out if our viewers inclinations are correct on this one.
Correct on this one.
Yeah, and that will be our next episode. Speaking of inclinations, Ben, if any viewer is so inclined to help support our show,
they can do that by going to maximumfund.org slash donate.
You can also support the show by buying an aforementioned P1 message. We've got merch items on the website, the Topatico site, got a couple of shirts, got a glass,
got a great junction motor glass. I should probably start working on the next thing. I have a few cool submitted designs from viewers, so it might be one of those. Who knows? Time to get cracking on
that I think. Yeah, well, we should thank Dark Materia for our theme music and Adam Ruggusia for much
of the other music you hear on the program.
We should thank great folks over at MaximumFund.org.
If you'd like to crack wise online about the show, use the hashtag GreatestGen on Twitter.
Adam is at Cut for Time and I am at Benjamin R. A. H. R. They're also great
and lively Reddit group and Facebook group and the greatest gen wiki on wiki.com. So all
of those are great resources and or communities.
Did you ever think we would be a podcast with 14 different pages of internet stuff?
It's pretty amazing.
It's a yeah, we should have our own page at some point so that we can point in the direction
of all of those.
Yeah, you know what?
It's great that like the the internet structure that is the best for our show are places that our viewers have constructed on their own.
The one place that we've made ourselves is garbage.
If you'd like to know about our upcoming tour, sign up for our mailing list.
It's got that biz slash mail.
And with that, we will be back at you next time with another great
episode of Star Trek the Next Generation and an episode of the greatest
generation that is going down for a murder rap unless Jardyl Aforge has Make it sound.
Make it sound.
Make it sound.
Make it sound. I do, don't think I'm the you, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I do, I