The Greatest Generation - It Seems Like a Plumbing Issue (VOY S7E14)
Episode Date: February 19, 2024When Voyager finds a D7 full of very religious Klingons, they blow up their ship after learning BLT is pregnant. But when the fetus’ DNA also cures their deadly virus, the nearest barren planet look...s perfect for their new empire. When is cleaning up poop like wiping your nose? Which drink is in honor of Dr. Star Trek? What did Kahless like to eat for breakfast? It’s the episode with a new ship’s surgeon!Support the production of The Greatest Generation.Friends of DeSoto for Democracy.Friends of DeSoto for Justice. Friends of DeSoto for Labor.Follow The Game of Buttholes: The Will of the Caretaker!Music by Adam Ragusea & Dark MateriaFollow The Greatest Generation on Twitter, and discuss the show using the hashtag #GreatestGen!The Greatest Generation is on YouTube.Facebook group | Subreddit | Discord | WikiSign up for our mailing list!Get a thing at podshop.biz!
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Here's to the finest crew in Starfleet.
Engage!
Watch your back, Charlotte.
Hello.
I'm Captain Cap, bringing what the universe says.
Boardback to school.
Captain Cap, bringing what the universe says.
Boardback to school.
I'm Captain Cap.
Welcome to the Greatest Generation.
It's a Star Trek podcast by a couple of guys.
You know, just a little bit of interest about having a Star Trek podcast.
I'm Ben Harrison.
I'm Adam Pranicka.
How you doing Adam?
I was a little late to the mic because I had to pull a thing out of Ripley's butt.
And I thought of you during Ben because-
That's very flattering.
Because I was thinking as gross as that experience was for me.
You've got to be dealing with far grosser,
far more often in your household, right?
I guess so.
I think that a diaper is grosser in the abstract
than it is when it's your particular baby.
There's no such thing as a baby like a baby only exists in so far it is in relationship with its parents and caretakers
That's way too heavy to be laying on me in the early afternoon man, yeah, well, I'm getting bar room philosophical already. You're really Cliff Clavening right now.
Amazing.
Well, the lady that taught our, like,
get to know your baby class said a version of that.
And there's like a literal version of it, which is like,
yeah, if like everybody stops taking care of the baby, the baby dies.
But it's also like a useful framework
for thinking about taking care of one.
And I think that some of it is even instinctive
and the poo poo pee pee stuff about a baby is very much like,
as just like, it's like wiping my own nose, you know?
Like, I mean-
Just not even a thing. I wouldn't want you to wipe my nose, it's like wiping my own nose, you know? Like, I mean... Just not even a thing.
I wouldn't want you to wipe my nose, but when I wipe my nose, I'm not like, oh God, it's
so disgusting.
Yeah.
I mean, I would never compare dog ownership with baby ownership, which is what I call
being a parent.
But yeah, I mean, the idea of pulling a poop out of my dogs, but would be horrifying before
knowing what it's like to have a dog in my life.
And now that's just like a Thursday afternoon.
Right.
Was this like the classic, the dog ate something stringy and so there's something hanging out
that's attached to something that's still in there?
Why do dogs love stringy things so much?
I don't know.
It's like their favorite thing.
And why do the toy makers keep making stringy things?
I don't know why the scientists keep making.
Yeah, that's how my days go, and Ben.
But all in all, pretty good.
And I've been looking forward to this episode because it is a quarks bar episode, as foretold
at the end of the previous episode.
We hit that square on the board.
What are you drinking over there, buddy?
I am drinking some Smith and Cross traditional Jamaica rum.
This is a pure pot still rum of the Navy strength variety.
Now what mean for FODs out there who might not be familiar?
Navy strength is a way of designating a full spirit liquor that's not quite like an overproof.
You know, 151 is the classic, like, high proof rum that, you know, college students have used
Such a classic, yeah
For time in the Miriam to get in big, big trouble
Oof, when was the last time you had that?
Oh, I'd keep some on hand
For when college students come over?
Oh, I enjoy Tiki drinks and like
Your D&D nights must be crazy
Oh, yeah, baby.
Um, no, like a lemon heart or, you know, Hamilton's 151 are called for in many more bracing Tiki
beverages, so...
I love one of those.
Navy strength just refers to alcohol that is sufficiently high in alcohol percentage that if it spills on gunpowder,
it doesn't compromise the flammability of the gunpowder.
The gunpowder will still work in the cannons.
And so-
That is such a great reference.
I love that.
Yeah, I have no idea if that's actually based on anything real, but like, I guess in the like Royal Navy in sailing ship days,
you got your gin ration or your rum ration as part of your daily shit on your ship.
Speaking of all of that, famously, you are a huge enthusiast of boat movies
where they shoot cannons out of the side.
You're a big master and commander guy.
One of the biggest.
I believe those fans are just called masterbaters.
Anyway, I had just seen Killers of the Flower Moon,
not that long ago, and the author of Killers of the Flower
Moon wrote a book called The Wager,
which is a tale of shipwreck, mutiny and murder.
Ben, this is a book I got for you.
Oh.
So the next time I see you, I'm gonna give this to you.
I have heard it is superior even.
Wow.
To master and commander,
which is why I thought it would make a kingly gift.
So. Amazing.
Remind me the next time we hang out,
I gotta give this to you.
Have you read or heard of this?
I have not.
I was literally like right before we were recording,
I was straightening up my bookshelf
and I pulled out my copy of Master and Commander
that a friend of DeSoto sent in on a recent Code 47.
I keep it next to my copy of Patriot Games
and my copy of Clear and Present Danger.
Your issues of Jane's Defense Weekly.
I was looking at it and I was like,
I'm reading Heat 2 right now.
That's the book that I currently have on my nightstand.
And I'm looking at Master and Commander and I'm like,
should I do it?
Should I just go like, I read dad books now?
I mean, it fits.
It looks good on you.
Do I drop my like almost exclusively sci-fi
and fantasy novel lifestyle for dad novel lifestyle?
Could be the path.
That's great for you.
So anyways, you know, if they have the barrels
of gunpowder down in the hold of the ship
and they get hit by a cannonball
and that cannonball causes the barrel of rum
to splash on the barrel of gunpowder,
it doesn't do anything to compromise their war readiness.
It's not like a Ford Pinto in the Navy situation.
Yeah.
Like you're not getting unintended explosions
out of your naval interactions there.
I'm sure there was plenty of rear-ending going on
on those ships, Adam, but not that kind.
Ben, I saw you finger that bottle earlier,
which is what inspired my choice of beverages today.
Oh, yeah. What do you got there?
I did not choose the same rum.
I chose a different rum.
And this rum is unique because it is distilled right across the way,
the base of the Santa Monica Mountains.
No kidding.
This is Parler K rum.
Have you, have you seen and heard of this?
I've seen advertisements for Parler K and or parlor key.
I've wondered how they would prefer people pronounce it.
Oh, when has that ever stopped us before?
This is Cesspe Creek Distillery out of Oxnard.
And it is described as the island ventures westward
in the original recipe made from scratch.
At our distillery that sits quietly below the Santa Monica Mountains.
In true small batches, then barreled in new American oak and finished in Pedro Jimenez
Sherry casks.
Ooh, alright.
It is a very pleasant amber.
It really is.
And four fingers of this and a rocks tumbler. I love this Polish tumbler because it's really big in circumference.
Yeah, that's a thick king.
I got some trivia for you about this episode, Ben.
Oh, really?
You, me, and most other Star Trek enthusiasts are aware of Dr. Star Trek, Larry Nemisek.
Yeah.
Met him a bunch of times.
I say it that way because he doesn't seem to remember us
anytime we run into him on a subsequent occasion.
We had drinks with him after our live show in LA this year.
He's great.
And it was great.
He's a great hang.
He told us about how he came to acquire
Gene Roddenberry's golf clubs.
One of the greatest hangs at Star Trek Las Vegas
is between three and four in the morning,
out on a casino floor with Dr. Star Trek getting hammered.
Yeah, what's his drink, Adam?
It's rum and diet coke, Ben.
Rum and diet coke.
Rum and diet coke.
He was drinking rum and diets when we went
and chilled with him after our live show.
We went to Formosa Cafe with him,
which is a place in LA that is known
for like a great tiki cocktail.
I'm like, hey, hey guys, I'm gonna go get us around.
What do you want?
Ben like points out really fun
and interesting tiki beverage.
I'm like, cool, I'm gonna get this other really fun
interesting tiki beverage. Dr. Star Trek Trek rum and diet. Make it a double. I love that.
He's great.
He rules.
The reason I bring him up, Ben, is like, I knew for a long, long time that he pitched
a story to Star Trek Voyager that was eventually turned into an episode.
This is that episode.
Wow.
Amazing.
He pitched it to the writer's room before the show even began, before the caretaker,
before the pilot of Voyager.
He got in there, slid his manuscript across the desk and was like, hey, what do you think
of this?
And then seven years later, he gets the call.
Amazing.
This is a great premise for an episode.
I tip my rum and diet to him.
You know, I have a little Dr. Pepper
left over here from lunch.
What do you think?
Do you think rum and Dr. Pepper is anything?
I think it is.
And I think it's in honor of Dr. Star Trek.
I think that is a kingly beverage.
All right, I'm pouring out the last of my Dr. Pepper
into my lovely Jamaican rum.
That's ship surgeon strength right there
when you mix the Dr. Pepper and the Navy strength, right?
There you go.
Here's the you, Dr. Star and the Navy's strength, right? There you go. Here's the U-Dr. Star Trek.
Yeah.
Ship surgeon of greatest generation.
Today's episode, Ben, it is as the game of buttholes,
the will of the caretaker has prophesized.
Mm, yeah, season four.
At season seven, episode 14,
prophecy.
Revert course.
Unless you've got something a little bigger in your torpedo tubes, I'm not turning around.
So our cold open involves Voyager being attacked by what seems like a ship off screen, but
when we go to the bridge, we learn that this is a ship that is cloaked and the
weapons are Klingon and holy shit, just a couple seconds later it's revealed it's a
D-Savon.
It just hit D8. Bring it on. This thing is a really old pile of shit.
So they're able to use like a version of their sensors that exploits something about these
old cloaking systems into finding it in space, ideating it and shooting it.
Yeah, they do a metaphysics scan.
They knock out the cloaking device
and pretty soon these guys are just dead in the water.
Like the element of surprise shit that they pulled
on the Voyager had shields down to 50%
in a way that was like, man, that's an old ass ship.
And that really packed a punch.
But once the Voyager crew kind of figured out
what was going on, they're no match.
And Janeway convinces the captain of the ship to get on FaceTime and cut over to the bridge of
the Klingon ship. And I was so glad that they spent the budget to give us a Klingon bridge here,
because I feel like, like this is like one of those things where like they could have built,
like they could have like put some Klingon badges and,
you know, some brown paint on a couple of stage flats and had a Klingon guy
sitting in front of it and sell this, but they really cut around this bridge.
And Janeway is like, what are you doing?
We're friends, like the Klingons of the Federation signed a peace treaty at Kittimer.
Have you ever heard of it?
It was like kind of a big deal.
These guys don't know what they're talking about.
She's being so cool about this though.
Like, and I think that she should be, I think, like, if I had to guess, if I had
ship surgeon Dr.
Star Trek here right now, I would ask him, is this kind of based on like those,
you know, like you hear those stories of like little islands in the Pacific where a detachment of Japanese Navy
personnel were left and they didn't hear about the end of the war because their radio was
broken. And so like they just stayed there and assumed it was still on for way longer
than World War II actually lasted.
You know, a writer of less pedigree might have made that the pitch here.
It's Klingons who don't know the war's over, man.
They're still fighting it.
That's not this at all.
Yeah.
So she's like, yeah, like we're friends with the Klingons now and I can prove it.
I got a chief engineer who's a Klingon
and this captain of the Klingon ship, Captain Kolar.
It's like, shit, maybe I gotta reassess
all of my assumptions.
Maybe I gotta stop manufacturing faucets
and toilets and stuff and kind of get with the times.
Yeah.
Janeway uses BLT as a way to broker an in-person discussion.
Like, I don't think there's any other reason to come over
than out of the curiosity about what BLT might be like.
Yeah.
They didn't do the thing that they sometimes did with Worf though,
where they like throw him in the captain's chair.
Like, you take this call, you know.
Or have her on the bridge for any reason?
Yeah.
She never up there.
So after Kohler arrives, they're walking through the corridors,
and there's a moment where it seems like this is going to be like
the standard diplomatic tour of the ship or whatever.
Kolar doesn't want that.
He wants to meet BLT now.
And so they go right to the conference room
where BLT and Jakota are waiting.
And his first reaction is to her body.
You're with child.
That's what the doctor tells me.
You're not supposed to do this, right?
Like even if you think, you're pretty sure,
you don't ask, like, how soon you're due to a lady.
If you're Chakote, aren't you a little hurt
that nothing's made about your appearance, either?
Like, he's got the huge face tattoo.
That has to be interesting to a Klingon of this era.
Like, hey, my face is here also.
I too am decorated.
Yeah, he's got to be bummed.
Yeah, but Kolar is like really floored by this information.
And he's like, wait, what month did you conceive?
And she's like, I don't know, man.
Like, this has already gotten very personal.
I don't even know you.
Cole, I was like, put another way,
what month did your husband dump in you?
She's like, no, I understood the premise of the question.
I didn't need another run at it.
Honestly, that made it more uncomfortable, not less.
I mean, at least he doesn't reach out to touch her belly.
That's just the worst.
Yeah, it happened to my wife so many times.
And when her baby was really little,
like people would touch him.
Like you'd be like out with him on the street
and people just touch the baby.
It's like, what are you doing?
I would say we're pretty close friends.
Never touched your baby, never touched your wife.
That's how polite I am.
Yeah, you stay well on the other side of the room
from both of them in a keep your arms crossed
and kind of like never make eye contact.
It's really abrupt here.
Like you think this meeting is going to turn into a thing,
but Kohler wants to get the hell out of there.
Kind of suddenly.
Got to go.
Janeway is like, hey, before you go,
maybe promise me you're not going to shoot once you're over there.
That can be sometimes how this happens.
She's like, no, I'm not going to shoot.
It's fine.
I just need to go.
I didn't wanna say this, but my stomach is...
I had some bad gach right before I came over here.
So, he goes back and he's talking to all these other
Klingon dudes and he's like, this, I think this is it.
I think this is what we've been looking for, scroll-wise.
And there's just so much talk of scrolls and signs
and quoting of things going on here
that you can tell that these guys believe
that some kind of prophecy is being fulfilled.
And they refer to it as the day of separation.
Doesn't mean much to us right now,
but it means a whole lot to these folks
who are in kind of a trust but verify mode
over there on the Klingon ship.
And over on the Voyager bridge,
they detect something kind of bad going on,
on that Klingonship right away.
Yeah, is there like a guy on the Klingonship
who's like grown up knowing his job
is to like push the big red button the second
somebody says the day of separation has arrived?
Cause this happened so fast.
I would say that I felt this moment more deeply
than I would say that I felt this moment more deeply than I would have anticipated
because this old D7 is fucking beautiful, man.
Yeah.
It is so neat to see it fly in formation with Voyager.
I wanted so much more from these shots and of this ship.
I wanted it to be around all the time.
I know.
And when they blew this thing up, it was really upsetting.
I totally agree.
I think that like one of the most effective choices that they made in this
episode was to make this a D7.
Yeah.
And to give us that feeling of like, we're running downhill toward the end of
this series.
Like what if they just have Klingon friends
with them for the rest of the way?
Yeah, it's like 200 of them.
We're sick.
And no, like the warp core is going critical.
Captain Kohler is like, you know,
you better be must out of here
because there's no fixing this in time.
And on the Voyager bridge, they're like, you know,
there's gonna be a lot of of porcelain that crashes into us
when that ship blows.
We need to get the fuck out of here.
And Janeway orders them to beam every Klingon aboard over to the Shuttle Bay and go to
warp at the second they've got everybody.
And Juvak is like, eww, that kind of outnumber us, Captain.
Did any part of your imagination go toward the idea
of those prison cells still being in the shuttle bay
and maybe a dozen of them being beamed into there?
That's where my mind went.
Wow, good call.
I didn't even think of that.
That's not it at all
because we get a wide shot from above in the shuttle bay
and there's 200 Klingons in there milling around.
I loved that shot.
I went back and watched that like three times.
So you watched it way more than I did.
Tell me whether or not that was eight Klingons just like copy pasted
around the whole room.
I think it was. They have not made this amount of loaf in the history of Star Trek. guns just like copy pasted around the whole room.
I think it was.
They have not made this amount of loaf
in the history of Star Trek.
I was in a student film in college
where I played an entire army storming up a hill
and they just had me like run up the hill.
You were a vizygot?
Like 50 times, you know.
Amazing.
And it looked great.
I kind of have always fantasized,
what if there was an army of 300 bends, you know?
I'd be terrible at that.
I don't know that I could do more than three or four facial expressions.
Oh, yeah, it was exhausting.
They did put a fake mustache on me for some of them.
That's great.
Our course is locked in.
You're too.
Listen to me very carefully, because I'm only going to say this once.
So they are able to warp away to escape this blast.
And in Janeway's ready room, Tuva confronts Kohler with the truth that this was auto-destruction.
And this has got to be something that Janeway is impressed by, right?
There's coffee in that self-destruct sequence.
This is exciting.
They did enough scanning of the other ship
as everything was happening that they can figure out
that this was not done in good faith.
That ship blew and blew big
because they blew it up intentionally
so that they could get on board Janeway's ship.
And he's like, yeah, I mean, here's the thing. They blew it up intentionally so that they could get on board Janeway's ship.
And he's like, yeah, I mean, here's the thing.
It's our sacred duty to worship that booty, specifically the booty of the unborn child
of BLT.
Yeah.
It's fun how he was never going to disclose this until after his plan was found out,
he's like, all right, fine.
I have a great grandfather and he lost faith in the empire.
And after finding a secret scroll,
I assembled a crew to go far into the galaxy
looking for the savior of our people.
The Kavanaugh is who we're looking for.
And also, Squee and-
BJ and Donkey-Dog dog.
And other binge drinker.
They believe to be BLT's unborn child.
This baby has an enormous amount of debt
that was suddenly forgiven
just before being given a huge promotion.
I went to Yale.
Kind of a lot of unanswered questions
around the savior of the people here.
Pretty troubling stuff,
but these Klingons believe that the Kavanaugh
will bring them out of their struggles
and lead them into a new empire.
Yeah, it's not that Kavanaugh is perfect,
but like Kavanaugh will make possible their goals.
Right. Which like most people don't agree with to be clear, but they don't care.
I love the, I should use a different word besides pregnancy, but I love the pregnancy of the moment
where like the idea of BLT being half-klingon is one
thing, but like how long they wait to disclose that it's also half Tom Paris' baby in there
is big fun.
That is a huge amount of tension that I almost wish they exploited for longer.
Yeah.
So they have a big McLaughlin group.
If you want.
It starts with BLT's incredulity at what the plan is.
They're almost amused by them in a fun way.
Yeah, this is Janeway and Tuvok bringing to the senior staff what they learned in this
meeting with Kohler.
And they're like, hey, you don't need to tell us what happened between you and a Kohler in a room.
Like that's a little bit more than you need to share.
Sure, I mean, you go to Europe,
you're gonna get extra colars.
Doing all kinds of things in your hotel room.
Yeah, when you turn on that faucet,
it just shoots water across the room.
What's that for?
Yeah, that's not for filling your night water cup.
Tell you that much.
So they're pretty concerned.
We have noticed that there's a lot of alien trash
of the galaxy kind of like milling around
in the shuttle bay,
and that presents some security challenges.
And why is the carpet all wet, Todd?
I don't know, Margo.
But what are we going to do about these people?
Like, we're still in the fucking Delta Quadrant.
Like, it's not like we're like close to home.
The tension of this scene is really interesting because they're like,
well, we can't just keep them in the shuttle bay forever.
And I think a good portion of this meeting are like, yeah, we can.
I mean, I don't think we blew all of the jail stuff out of the door.
I think we can rebuild some barracks or whatever.
We could stop and get a bunch of hay to put down on the ground.
Like a crowded cargo bay full of people walking around on hay is not unprecedented in Star
Trek.
Your hospitality leaves a hell of a lot to be desired.
They get to roam free as long as they don't go into restricted areas.
Ben, you mentioned earlier, like you evoked that idea of the World War II soldier
being unaware that the war is over.
Imagine fighting a war for generations
on your ship over there.
Being the great grandchildren of people
who believe the Federation is their mortal enemy.
How long would it take you to be peaceful
toward those people as you walk around their ship?
Unmonitored.
I think it is an enormous leap to just go,
yeah, let's just let them walk around.
We'll put up a velvet rope in front of the doors
to engineering or whatever.
Yeah.
Well, I mean, we'll pitch a tent right next to the Warp Corps
for a few of them just to keep ourselves honest.
I think there's a generational war refractory period
that you kind of need to endure
before you come out on the other side
with peaceful feelings.
Yeah.
I mean, like the first example of this we get
is seen in the lunchroom, which is really
crowded and mostly with Klingons. And Nelix is into this, like he's mostly kind of like
moved the menu over into offerings that are more palatable to Klingons who are, you know,
palatable to Klingons who are, you know, drinking blood wine and eating gach and, you know, beef ribs and stuff.
It seems like Klingons would love beef ribs, right?
Yeah.
Oh, come on.
So fun.
The gach is not moving.
And initially I was like, that's got to be sad for them.
But then I was like, they probably haven't had, like these Klingons probably have never
had live Gach.
Like they've probably only ever had replicated dead Gach.
That's a great call.
I mean, back in their era,
do they even have replicators?
I guess they do.
I don't know.
Cause they had it in Strange New Worlds and Discovery
and that was pre-
Yeah.
Yeah.
Nelix, and I should say right from jump,
great Nelix episode.
Awesome Nelix episode.
Is totally psyched about getting to make all these fun foods.
Fun foods he wouldn't ordinarily make.
Yeah.
But he does have a note.
Yeah.
A note about the summer bus with the windows closed,
smell that seems to be a part of the mess hall at this point. What's the summer bus with the windows closed smell
that seems to be a part of the mess hall at this point?
I like that he likes it.
Like he's like, I think it's great,
but some of the crew have come to me
to pass this up to you.
These guys are a little bit stinky.
I think it is so in character with Nelix
who has tastes that are bizarre and unusual compared to the rest
of the crew. It would make sense that he would find the musk of these folks interesting and even
pleasurable. Harry gets in the middle of some shit. Some shit pops off between a couple of these Klingons. They are having a big disagreement
and Harry Kim is trying to stop them.
And Nelix is like, no, no, no, no, no.
I've been reading about like conflict resolution
Klin Klingon style in all of my research
about how to make friends with these people.
And he gets in there in the middle and pronounces like quarreling
over food is chicken shit when you could be preparing yourselves for battle with a real enemy.
And it doesn't go great for Nelix in this moment. Kim has to has to reengage and he throws one of
the Klingons against the wall. And she turns out to be a lady Klingon
with a boob window and she is very interested in the amount of passion he shows in this moment.
The oversexed Klingon female. I mean has that been a part of Star Trek forever?
I don't know.
It doesn't seem that way. I don't think T.O. has had horny Klingon ladies.
I don't think it had lady Klingons at all.
Didn't.
This lady, Chirrega, is very intrigued by Voyager's stickman.
I mean, who wouldn't be?
Yeah, she's like, there's only one one but it's enough to fill me up
Parents must be very proud she was
Aroused Yeah, Harry Kim. Who are you? Harry Kim.
Yeah, Harry Kim could fold it over
and make it happen for her.
Yeah.
Later on, we get the payoff for a reference
that happened earlier in that conference room.
As a consequence of all of these Klingons joining their ship,
everyone who lives on the ship currently
is going to have to share their quarters
in order to allow room for their visitors.
And wouldn't you know it?
Nelix rolls into Tuvok's quarters after work
that they are sharing that Tuvok did not know about.
Mr. Nelix, may I ask what you're doing here?
He's the last one with the open room.
What does that say about Tuvok?
Is it either no one wants to live with Tuvok, which I understand,
or Tuvok did some sketchy shit in order to make it seem like he had a roommate
already or was otherwise occupied in some way?
I think either is plausible.
Well, he's a Vulcan and therefore he cannot lie, but.
When you live with a Vulcan roommate,
you got to expect there's gonna be
a lot of meditating happening
and you don't wanna be in the room for that.
Right, I sort of think the former,
like nobody wanted this.
And Tuvok was happy to assume
that it just wouldn't happen for him.
Like, I think it was my sophomore year of college.
I didn't have a roommate in my double
for the first three weeks of school.
Oh boy.
And I was like, is, do I just have a single?
You just, you can't say shit, Ben.
And I didn't.
I didn't.
Yeah.
And then a guy showed up and it sucked.
He was whack.
Who shows up to college three weeks late?
They're called doctors.
I don't know what he was doing,
but I had two extremely shitty roommates.
He was the shittier of the two.
But yeah, and like showed up three weeks into a semester and ruined my whole like,
you know, it was a real meditation fest in that room before he showed up.
Yeah, whenever you rolled up to Ben's door
and you saw a cravat tied around the doorknob,
maybe come back later.
Captain's the killer, killer, killer.
Anywhere the yogurt says, go forth, killer.
Captain's the killer, anywhere the yogurt says, go forth, killer.
I love that Nilek's saunters in there,
like they are the odd couple who have been living
together for years before Tuvok has an opportunity to ask, what the fuck?
Because in many ways they have been living together for years.
They were Tuviks.
It's true.
I wish one of them said that. I love how like Tuvok is logical and
unemotional, but even he does a pretty good job articulating
how let down he is by this. I prefer solitude in my own
quarters. And that is not enough to penetrate Nelix's
social obliviousness defenses.
Like nothing is getting through that shield.
It is such a magical combination of like,
I did so much research about what Klingons are into
and how they think and like what is meaningful to them
on a interpersonal basis so that I could like help
the crew negotiate this transition.
And also that one weird guy with the pointy ears,
like who cares what he thinks?
Yeah, great scene.
So we get a moment with BLT at work
and she's clearly been at work for quite a long time.
Tom is slaving away over their dinner
as I know that you and I can relate to.
Just like a, well, like I started cooking
because I thought you were gonna be ready for dinner at 7.30
and like some of these things are kind of hard to stop
once they're started.
And now it seems like you're not gonna be ready for dinner
to like eight or eight 30.
So I just wanna know what's going on.
Let me tell you another thing
that you and I are acutely familiar with.
The idea that BLT gets a call from Paris
that she basically ignores.
The idea that our wives will be on their phones,
I'm just gonna be kind and say fairly often, The idea that our wives will be on their phones,
I'm just gonna be kind and say fairly often, except for the moments when we're out of the house,
needing to communicate with them about something.
That's the moment where they're just not looking at it.
It's that close at hand
and I don't think about it very often.
Did I tell you a legit profoundly scary thing happened to me recently that is related to
this concept?
I got home from a social hang and I came home to a house where the TV was on, the dog was
there, my wife's phone was there.
Everything was as if my wife had just been beamed
onto an alien spaceship.
Like it was like she had just disappeared.
Like there was food on the stove.
It was wild.
And so I call out to her, love her, where have you gone?
She's not anywhere. So I call out to her, love her, where have you gone?
She's not anywhere. She's not in the bathroom.
She's not in either yard,
having taken care of a Ripley mess or whatever.
She's gone.
She's gone.
And I'm in the house for like 10 or 15 minutes.
I can't text her, her phone's there.
I'm like, where the hell is she?
Finally, like 30 minutes later, she came home.
And I was like trying to be chill about it, but like, hey,
what are you doing here?
It turns out she had made and delivered key lime pies
to our neighbors using the limes for my giant lime tree.
You guys have an incredibly prolific lime tree.
Yeah.
So like all of the cooking apparatuses on the counter,
like this is a kitchen that had been used.
Yeah, yeah.
Which is what made the scene so unusual for me.
And she's like, yeah, I just got roped into a conversation.
I didn't think I would be gone that long.
So I left all of my shit.
And it made me think like,
I cannot think of a condition
where I wouldn't bring my phone with me.
Yeah.
Even if I'm just going to a neighbor's.
It struck me as totally unusual
and probably something I should do more often.
But in this case, kind of terrifying.
But also like in a previous era,
like this wouldn't be that weird.
Not at all.
And it wouldn't like jar you that much
because like, yeah, like people are gone
and you don't know why all the time.
And because there's no way to just text them,
that's a curiosity that can never be satisfied.
So you don't even indulge it.
Yeah, like the TV show was not paused.
Yeah.
Like there was creepy aspects to this.
Like the old kind of show where you couldn't pause it.
Yeah, it was really unusual.
Yeah, that's such a fucking weird,
but it's also like such a Star Trek thing, right?
Like you can just communicate with everybody
all the time in Star Trek.
And like it's weird and breaks the show
when they don't just ask the computer where someone is
and are confused about that, right?
Yeah.
And like that's sort of a thing
that we are like starting to have in our reality now.
And when it doesn't work, it does kind of break reality.
It's like, no, come on, the narrative is fucked up
at this point.
The whole reason I got the watch
was so I could leave the phone at home.
And I still never leave the phone at home.
I got to do that.
I was much better about leaving the phone at home
when I first got the watch
because there was a ride share app on the watch
and they stopped supporting the watch on the ride share app.
They blew it.
You blew it.
I used it a couple of times where I was like,
all right, I'm just gonna,
I'm gonna leave the phone at home.
I'm gonna go out and socialize.
I'm gonna be with the people that I'm with.
If I really need to communicate with somebody
that can be accomplished on the watch,
but I don't, it's not a seductive enough temptation
to like look at the whole night.
Yeah.
And I can get home like in an emergency if I need to
because I've got the app.
And yeah, they took it away.
They took the killer app away.
You blew it.
So when BLT ignores Paris' call,
this is what that made me think of.
And so like, it's sort of like that thing where like,
she sees the call, she's like,
oh shit, I'm late for dinner.
Doesn't answer it, but like heads for the door.
Then there's a bunch of pach parazzi out there.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
She doesn't want any of that either.
So she's site to site transports from engineering home.
You and I know how this goes.
You try to leave the venue.
There's a bunch of thirsty fans out there.
Yeah.
How about where BLT appears near the dinner table?
Like that could be a terrifying moment, depending on where Paris is.
I think it's terrifying for Paris specifically because she's in that pose where she's like rubbing her back like,
ugh what a day.
Mm-hmm.
And when you have already done the thing where you're like, I'm a little bit stressed out
about dinner getting put on a table at a time
that works for everybody.
So I'm gonna call and you can tell your partner
is annoyed that you called and then they show up
with the what a day pose.
It's like, I'm fucking in for it.
I'm, I just fucking, I made my bed.
Now I got to lie in it.
What you're describing as the reversal on Paris.
Like, Paris has the confidence to set the meal
onto the table after having his call screened by BLT.
In order to get the upper hand on whatever happens
when BLT comes home, but when BLT site to sites
with that pose, it's been reversed.
BLT has the upper hand now.
Yeah, she's fucking pregnant, man.
You can tell her body is sore,
like she gets on the couch and does that like,
oh, my fucking back.
They're trying to have a moment
when the captain just kind of barges in
and it's like the Klingons are on hunger strike, BLT.
You gotta go talk to them.
It's weird how BLT gets it from both barrels because when she's complaining to Paris about
her day, Paris preaches patience.
And when Janeway comes in about this hunger strike, she's encouraging BLT to hear them
out.
It kind of sucks for BLT,
the kind of position she's in.
It is brutal for her.
Like how many masters everyone is asking her to serve.
And I think it's a great BLT episode for like,
I don't know, it just, it felt like really authentic too.
I mean, I've never been pregnant, I don't know, it just, it felt like really authentic to,
I mean, I've never been pregnant,
but I have observed a pregnant person up close
and the amount of demands everyone wants to put on you.
You haven't been pregnant,
but you have had prime rib for dinner before.
Yeah.
Coffee black, make it yourself.
I'm trying to help you see this as an opportunity to grow.
Make it yourself. So she goes down and meets see this as an opportunity to grow. Make it yourself.
So she goes down and meets with the elders of the Clegones
who don't seem that old mostly.
I love the burn barrel in the shuttle bay
kind of mise-en-scène here.
Yeah, it's great.
She shows up and they're like,
the ridges are weak on her.
Like, what the fuck?
And like, word had not gotten back to them
from the like, like Japanese schoolgirl fanboys
standing outside engineering.
Like, these guys do not know until this moment
that BLT is only half-cling on.
And they are shook.
We destroyed our ship because you said she was the mother of the Kuvamakh.
Show me where it's written that the Kuvamakh must have pure Klingon blood.
Yeah, and that's before they hear Paris is the father of the child.
And then accusations of a false savior are aired in their grievances and yikes.
This does not seem like a good scene.
I know that you're familiar with situations
where things don't go well for a Kohler.
Could you relate to the captain of the Klingons
at all in this moment.
It seems like a plumbing issue.
Because out in the corridor after the meeting
breaks up, Kohler's like,
hey, we got a plugged up drain here.
And if this thing overflows, it's gonna be a holy war.
Yeah, that could be good.
Yeah.
So in the conference room,
Kohler has an interesting proposition.
He's like, now everybody knows BLT's baby is not
Krav Maga. But what Kohler's theory presupposes is,
maybe they only need to convince my people that she is.
He's an interesting character because he's like, he's the captain of the Klingons.
He is multi-generational at this point on this mission
to fulfill the prophecy in these scrolls.
And the conclusion he has drawn is
those scrolls are a bunch of bullshit.
The people that started this mission were lunatics
and the people that I live with are believers in it,
but I am very concerned for their wellbeing
and they've suffered so much
because we are on this janky ass old ship
from like the TOS era.
It's what I call the 2260s, you know, Spock, Scotty, those guys.
Like this thing was built in the 60s for Christ's sake.
And we're out in the D-quad BLT.
Can you just put the hat on and pretend
you're the Krav Maga for a little while?
Quit going for my grind.
No grind, no Krav Maga.
Oh, oh, oh.
Kohler articulated something that I've thought about
for a long time, W slash R slash T, like big religion.
And I'm not gonna be specific about which religion,
I think many of them could fall into this category,
but like the biggest and most powerful ones
would seem to have like their leadership figures
and then like a whole bunch of subordinates.
But you can't tell me that at least a few
of those subordinates aren't like,
just gotta keep wearing the hat and slippers
and like keep doing the thing.
Because if I don't, it's gonna be anarchy.
Like we cannot let this structure dissolve.
Yeah.
Like the idea that any institution has 100% faith
in everything doesn't seem viable or truthful or whatever.
Only the friends of DeSoto are truly of the faith, you know?
Like they're the only people that are true believers.
I agree.
But it's so refreshing to hear a caller go like,
look, we got to just maintain, right?
There's a lot about this that is ridiculous,
but like absent this, the whole structure falls apart.
And that would be worse than preserving the thing
to begin with.
Because there's that tension between stability and justice
that runs through all of sociology and humanity.
And there are people that are absolutists on both sides.
Like the stability absolutists are often,
you know, cited as carrying water for the injustice people
and the justice absolutists are often criticized
for advocating for a complete destabilization
that would lead to more suffering.
Right. And you've got to do that math in that position.
And as the captain of this band of 204 Klingons,
Kolar is in a unique position to flush a solution through.
Absent at this meeting are two characters
that I wish were there for the comedy reasons alone.
Because what's on the table is like,
let's keep the story going so that we can
drop these Klingons off at a planet
that we could resettle, get the hell off the ship,
problem solved.
And if Nelix and Tuvok
were at this meeting, I bet they'd be pro deception completely, right? Oh man. Because
they don't want to live together anymore. They have such a unique motivation not to
let the Klingon stay on board for that much longer. They have a very personal investment
in why this should be the plan.
I wonder if that would have gotten too close
to the Worf's brother is Paul Sorvino episode in Vibes.
Yeah.
But yeah, they like.
Well, Worf's father was Paul Sorvino.
No, it was his brother.
What?
Yeah, and they like the simulated thing in the holodeck
where they took the villagers from one place to another.
Oh, God, that was so long ago.
Yeah.
That's wild.
Hey, we'll get back there eventually, buddy.
Yeah.
Next series.
But Kohler is like, right next to me,
there's a little roll of paper right next to me.
Is that rolled over the top or over the back?
We can call it a scroll if you will.
And come study the scroll with me.
See if you can find a way in studying these scrolls
to help me bring my people to deliverance.
And she's like, all right.
I mean, the tension in it also having to do with,
with Kohler being like, hey, Janeway,
you ever bend any rules to get your crew home?
Headed in the right direction?
Like, look at us, we're captains out here in the D-Quad.
Like, we gotta bend the rules sometimes, right?
I think that finally solidifies that decision
as viable in this scene.
It does.
And so he and BLT have a meeting in her and Tom's quarters.
And I loved this because there's a moment
where he's like walking around and he's like,
do you don't have any Kailash shit in here?
And he is standing in front of like a 1950s toaster
that's just on the shelf.
Like clearly Tom is like so into 50s shit
that he got a fucking toaster that-
BLT is like clearly you're not familiar
with the New Testament. Dude, Kalish loved toast.
Loved it.
Yeah, when they brought like a genetic facsimile of him to life,
I'd like Worf gave him the blessing to become the head of the Klingon Empire.
As a sovereign but not as like the political leader. He was really into toast.
That was in the hot pink letter version of the book.
A lot of young Klingons can't afford houses
because they spend so much on toast
with like avocado on it and stuff.
Yeah.
This is a really interesting scene
because Kohler's like,
I noticed you don't have all of the things
that I would have if I were you in your quarters.
And also, do you want to pray together?
And BLT is like, I don't really do any of that.
And colors like, cool, well, I'm gonna.
Yeah.
And when he does this, it's such a great scene
because up until this moment,
BLT hadn't really given these old prayers much thought. But as soon as he starts to recite it, BLT hadn't really given these old prayers much thought but as soon as he
starts to recite it BLT remembers and she starts mouthing the words something
sticking. I can remember the words to this specific prayer which implies that that it is so deep in my memory that it outlasted my lobotomy.
There is no depth you could stick the ice pick that would remove this from my consciousness. I've got to get that latinum. Put your latinum where your mouth is. But I've got to get that latinum.
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We won't actually heal you. I think that Ren T Brown, the actor that plays Kohler, is really great in this scene.
And I looked him up, he's like played a character
on the Orville, he's like still doing stuff.
I like that his portrayal of a Klingon authority figure,
like many of the other Klingons that we get to meet,
maybe not all of them.
Like he's specifically like enough generations have passed
from completely war like crazy Klingon
to like more learned and red Klingon
that like he's so, he feels like a modern Klingon
in so many ways without having been exposed
to modern Klingons or the historical events that would have made that possible, you know? Like in a nature versus nurture kind of way, nature
made this possible also. He arrived at many of the same conclusions that other contemporary
Klingons did. Right. They do the prayer and it's like, this was a very relatable scene to me. Like,
I'm not a religious man, but like the times that I have been in a group of people
reciting a prayer together as a group,
I do find that there's something powerful about that.
And I don't know, like speaking of master and commander,
which we talked about at the beginning of this episode,
like that scene at the kind of break into the final act
of master and commander when they cite the Lord's prayer,
I find that like an incredibly moving scene.
Like it is not about what that prayer means to me,
it's about what that prayer means to them.
And I think that there is so much in this moment
that is super authentic to that kind of experience where it's like a deep childhood memory for BLT.
And the idea that there are lots of coincidences that her life happens to have that line up with these scrolls starts to become persuasive to her in this moment.
Yeah, great scene. So over in Six Bay, Kim is there with face wounds from his horny Klingon woman.
And Dr. Mark has no advice besides kill or mate.
And he gives Kim a permission slip for fucking aliens.
That Janeway has to sign as well. Yeah, authorization granted, Harry Kim.
Make sure you return the carbon copy to my office
before you actually do it.
This is the Harry Kim form.
Yeah, it really is.
Didn't exist before him.
Those pages are stuck together because of the carbon paper,
not for any other reason.
We get this moment in the lunchroom after hours
where now BLT is kind of is trying to wear the hat,
trying to live the truth that Kolar was hoping she would,
where she relates some of her epic battle stories
to these people and Tom is like,
Soto Vochie to Neelik's like,
some of that a little bit more than she actually did at the time.
But that's just, that's part of the culture, man.
You know?
I love that he's even at this thing.
Good job by Tom Paris.
Yeah, he showed up for all the things, you know?
Yeah, yeah.
It's not that she's pregnant, they're pregnant.
I bet she wishes she were there without him.
We get to know Tegreth a little bit more in this scene.
There have been scenes previously in this episode
where he's kind of piped up about how bullshit this all seems.
And this is a scene where he is very energized
in this opinion and he is not on board at all. He feels like BLT is
being puppeted by Kohler, and by the end of it, he challenges Paris in a fight to the
death. Paris accepts.
It's a great moment. He stabs the carving knife into the burnt bird meat and Paris picks it up.
And I mean, like maybe a little bit of a stretch for Paris.
Like I kind of thought instead
that they were gonna take the scene
in a direction of Paris going,
and I beat Captain Chaotica and like told some,
some like bullshit stories,
but instead it's Paris agreeing to an actual death match
and BLT being like, that's Tigress.
He's fucking tough as hell.
I think referring to chaotic is super interesting because like up
until this moment, I was thinking of these Klingons as kind of
Lenny Klingons, like they're from a group that only knows of
what was true 100 years ago in terms of technology and
everything else.
I thought for sure this episode was going to construct a story in which they could use the holodeck
against Tigreth where they would give Paris super strength or something, a hollow Paris
if you will, like something in order to use their technology advantage
against these guys, but that wasn't the case at all.
This seems to be on the up and up.
It's a great challenge as Paris and he says, yes.
I love that it's like smash cut to the meaning after.
You're here too.
Janeway is like, you're not going to do this, right?
You're in so much trouble, Paris.
What was I supposed to say?
How about no?
When Tuvac enters this meeting with Tigret and Kohler,
the plan is quickly pivoted into dull bat leths
and not sharp bat leths.
This is American gladiator rules
and not fight to the death rules.
We're going to do a scrimmage instead of a real game there will be no death
matches aboard my ship meanwhile in a hallway Harry is trying to avoid that
horny Klingon lady and what a guy Nelix jumps on the sex grenade for him you
better believe that one's gonna blow big
You better believe that one's gonna blow big. I love how Nelix alpha is the shit out of Harry Kim here.
Yeah.
This is great.
It's great.
Didn't know he had this gear.
I didn't either.
And then the next scene is the big band left fight and they've done Star Trek caves up
in the holodeck.
The captain is there with Nelix and Dr. Mark is like,
oh yeah, I'm basically like the ambulance
that's parked ringside in case
one of the fighters goes down hard.
There's one element about this scene
that didn't work for me
and I wanna know if it's the same for you.
Putting Tom Paris in the bear suit, like a little kid wearing a
bear suit, I couldn't get this out of my
mind.
I literally, here's my note, I'll read it
to you verbatim. Tom looks like a kid in
his dad's business suit in Klingon armor.
It's the fuzzy arms. I wish he had just
had like cut off sleeves, like his spindly human arms coming out of this uniform. I wish he had just had cut off sleeves. His spindly human arms coming out of this uniform,
I thought would have been better than this costume.
Bat-lithed out, guns out.
Yeah, the arms don't work, but I thought he did a great job with the stage combat.
Like B-Dunks looked as good as anybody ever has
swinging a batlet around in this scene.
Great job by him.
It's a long fight scene that has a lot of attacks
and parries and ducks.
Turn, parry, dodge, spin, ta, thrust.
And getting slammed against a wall
and then pushing the guy off and losing your sword
and running for it and getting it up off the ground
just in time.
I love the idea that these batlets are non-lethal
as if like a yardstick covered in butter knives
is still gonna fucking hurt.
Like the sharpness isn't the problem, it's the energy.
Yeah, it's such an exciting scene.
It's almost a shame it ends the way it does because it just kind of peters out as to Gress gets more and more gassed and
He just seems like he old man's out of it. Yeah, he's fucking exhausted
Yeah, he's like that guy you see in
viral videos like the the the boomer at a sporting event that got too drunk and like picks a fight
with people that they shouldn't, you know?
And then it just gets like shoved into an aisle.
That's what this guy reads like.
Yeah.
And so he goes down and Kohler explains like,
oh, this is, this is Norette.
And we smashed cut to six bay and we learned
that this is a sneak,
like Noret to the Klingons is like, you know,
when you're not fortunate enough to die an honorable death
in the Klingon way, Noret comes and gets you.
And Mark is like, no, it's this like,
it's this sneaky virus that it hides in your DNA
and the transporter filters didn't detect it
because it's so, it's so dormant and then it activates at some point and...
It's like shingles.
Yeah.
It's cling on shingles.
It's cling shings.
And I love when Janeway is like, you didn't think the Tellist you guys had a fucking disease?
And Kohler is like, we do you guys, had a fucking disease.
And color is like, we do not think of this as a disease.
It's just a natural part of our life cycle
on board our like ancient claptrap D7.
And I love that little flourish of writing
because that feels super authentic to Klingons.
We're old, we don't go to the doctor.
He talking about. They've all established all of this super authentic to Klingons. We're old, we don't go to the doctor.
He talking about. They've all established all of this
and the camera kind of pans over
and you realize that Tom and Belana
have been standing in Six Bay for all of this.
Janeway turns to Dr. Mark and he's like,
she's got it, yeah baby she's got it. Yeah, baby, she's got it.
She's your Venus.
She's your vector, direct contractor.
I'm gonna need a new microphone foes after that.
Objection noted, we'll do this without you. Do it, do it, do it, do it. Objection noted, we'll do this without you.
Do it.
Get, do it.
Get, do it.
Objection noted, we'll do this without you.
Do it.
Get, do it.
Get, do it.
Do it.
They get to Gretth up off of his bio bed
and to Gretth heads out of Six Bay
to go get ready for to death.
Yeah, he is very upset.
He tells us that the elders that the child
is not Queen Amon.
And he seems to be a little bit of a rabble rouser, right?
He kind of forces the remaining believers in BLT's child
to maybe reconsider their belief system, right? of forces the remaining believers in BLT's child
to maybe reconsider their belief system, right? They have to act for the good of their people
to resume their search.
And it's like, it's a very much,
like they didn't realize they were getting played
by Kohler the way they were.
Like Kohler has been acting in what he believes
is the good of his people this entire time.
And they're like, actually the good of his people this entire time. And they're like,
actually, the good of our people is doing the shit we've been doing and suffering under
the entire time. And we recommit to that. And the way to do that is to steal this ship
because we blew up our old one.
What do you make of the quality? And we see this all the time in movies and TV and in
real life, that as soon as the spell is broken,
you know, as soon as true believers lose their belief,
they must immediately glom on
to another just a substantial belief system.
Like they cannot be absent that essential quality.
It's like they either glom onto a new one
or double down on the old one
Even though it's like totally absurd at this point
But it feels so real for Tegret to go like yeah, the scrolls are bullshit. Guess what?
We're taking over Voyager and for everyone to be like yeah
Yeah, and then the next scene is there in the ass lab and he's like gassing up Kohler like,
yeah, we gotta find,
we gotta do a survey of a planet
so that BLT's child can lead us to it.
Cause I'm into that now.
If you're Kohler and Tigret starts being nice to you,
that's suspicious, right?
You gotta like that.
I don't like that.
You freak out when Tigret starts. I think helpful Klingons in general have got to freak out when Tigret starts.
I think helpful Klingons in general have got to be suspicious.
Mm-hmm.
So, you know, they come to this planet and they start getting ready to do surveys of
the surface and one of the Klingons is like,
so, Harry Kim, tell me about your transporter system and how they are used and what button
you push to do the beaming.
These are the targeting scanners?
Exactly.
I don't like this scene for Harry Kim.
He's a real mark.
How can you be this guileless and be such an accomplished stickman?
I don't know.
Or is it the like complete lack of guile that makes him such a trustworthy lover?
It's what floods basements across the quadrant.
Yeah.
Back in Six Bay BLT is told by Dr. Mark
that he's had a huge breakthrough.
That's like a tiny moment in this greater sequence
because back in the transporter room,
Chacote is like,
all right, I'm gonna walk this giant group of Klingons
to the transporter room.
I'll go ahead and lead, cause I know where that is.
I'm gonna stay up front here, back turned the entire time.
And I'm never, even when I go through the doors
of the transporter room, I'm never gonna turn around.
I'm gonna walk all the way up onto the pad
and then caboose, he's ambushed from behind.
Yeah.
And the plan that we see unfold
is transporting the entire Voyager crew away to the surface,
but they just can't get them all
because there's a force field around the bridge.
The bridge is onto this.
Like they see that there are shots being fired
and the transporter room.
I love that Janeway calls down to engineering
and no one answers.
And then they whip pan over to Paris
and he's like, figures, right?
This is my life.
This is what it's like to be me.
I'm talking about some shit that I'm going through
and oh, somebody's texting you.
Oh, I'll wait and then fucking you try.
You like something really important is happening
and you try and get in touch.
The phone's nowhere nearby.
Yeah.
Am I making any sense here?
Over in the transporter room,
Tuvok and a security detail
have been dispatched and they get there in time
to watch the Klingons beam away to the bridge.
And on the bridge, there is an absolute firefight.
Yeah, they can beam into the force field,
but not out of it for some reason.
But this firefight is fucking awesome.
It's so good.
Where did the Klingons get dustbusters? I really wanted them to have Klingon weapons here.
That would have been cool. Yeah, like take them out of pieces of their uniform, like old school.
It makes sense that they wouldn't when they were suddenly beamed away from the D7, but like, I just love the look of them so much.
Yeah, it really must burn to Gretz's toast that they don't do mercy killing son Voyager.
Cause when he loses this gun fight, he's like, all right.
Like, I, hey, I took a swing, like just,
just like do me now.
And they're like, yeah, we're not gonna shoot you
while you're lying on her fucking bridge.
Janeway is like, the only thing capable
of burning your toast is in BLT and Paris's garters.
Turn the dial up to 11. See what happens.
Well, it's one louder, isn't it?
He wakes up on a biopad, cured of the naret, and it's because BLT's
child had hybrid stem cells that Mark turned into a cure.
I got a pretty great doctor on the ship.
Good job by him.
I saw it.
Tigret's cured, so are all the rest of the Klingons, so is BLT and her unborn child.
But specifically, Tigret is like, this is proof about BLT's unborn child.
Like this, this makes me think that the Skrulls were true the whole time.
Yeah.
He has a fucking religious moment here where he's like, she is the Katamari damacy.
You know, in the beginning of the episode, I thought the slippers and the hats were cool as hell.
And then in the middle, no way.
Not for me.
Now, slipper and hat guy.
Hell yeah.
Give me them scrolls.
Yeah.
Like a main point of this episode is that we are taking these Klingons to a planet where they can rebuild their society.
We're just dropping them off where they get to do this.
And almost nothing is made
of what a significant moment this must be in their lives
and how fucking terrifying it has to be on so many levels
that they're just getting left in the middle of nowhere.
Unlike a barren planet with no technology or anything.
You'd never get to go down there either.
You never see the surface.
Even though like most of the Voyager crew spent a significant portion of this episode down there.
Instead, you know, we get a little like log about how they're beaming everybody down and then
Tuvok coming back to his quarters and there's,
in Tuvaat's defense, no gym sock hanging from the door,
but also no doorknobs, so where you hang it?
There's just a Leola root laid across the threshold.
That was like the drunkest moment on the show.
That was really fun.
How you doing with your beverage, by the way?
Oh, I'm almost to the bottom.
Yeah. Feeling good.
This is one of those glasses that starts, like, look at this puck of glass at the bottom.
Like, half of this glass is glass.
That is a... I admire you for getting that home from Eastern Europe in your suitcase.
Yeah.
Because that's a thick king. That's a lot to shatter in your suitcase.
It feels like pounds, pounds of glass.
Yeah.
Yeah, love it.
It's beautiful.
Tuvac finds Chirrega in the room.
Who's that?
The Klingon lady with the boom window.
Oh yeah, yeah.
Oh God, you to talk about musk
is this the happiest nilix has ever been
they're both fully clothed which means like they tore that ass up and then they were like getting
dressed and they were still kind of going at it yeah it's the sort of fuck-fest that you know there's some leaking inside the clothes
after.
Oh, yeah, for sure.
And Nelik seems to have really, I mean, he's got to be fucking psyched that Alpha Quadrant
is where they're headed, right?
Yeah, I mean, if there's more of these out there, he's as motivated as ever to get where
they're going.
Is there not room in New Star Trek for a Nelix bump into?
Like we've seen a lot of these characters
in these new shows.
I think what's so interesting about that question
is how little I thought of Nelix
at the beginning of this series
and how much I think of him now.
Yeah.
Like he would be most welcome in a new Star Trek series.
But in that first episode of Voyager,
hold him under that bathwater until the barbell stops.
Just fine with that.
He and Jereg have really trashed two ox quarters.
He promises to get everything right.
Just go, Mr. Licks.
BLT says goodbye to Kohler in a way that I know
that you sort of wish you could say goodbye to Kohler
almost every day.
Like, I wish this wasn't something I had to think about every day.
It's true.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And we cut to the button of the episode.
Tom and B.L.T. hanging up a ceremonial batlet
on the wall in their quarters
where their baby daughter will sleep.
You gotta make sure this isn't above a changing table
or a crib, right?
That's just smart with all the bangers
likely to get dropped on the ship.
Yeah, like they say in California, like don't hang art that's under glass above your bed
because if it falls off the wall in an earthquake.
I've never heard that before.
And not that that's a problem for us, but.
Oh, you guys have lots of great art on your walls, though.
Like, yeah, like it's a thing to think about.
And I think they very wisely hang the sword on the wall
over like the dresser, you know.
Worst case scenario, it's gonna fall on the floor.
Not gonna like, lop anyone's head off in a midnight banger.
And yeah, they add Kuvamak to the baby name list.
Yeah, one more for the list.
Into the credits.
Ben, did you like this episode?
You know, I'm really easy to get along with most of the time.
But I don't like bullies.
I don't like friends.
And I don't like you.
I'm a stupid.
I really like this episode.
I thought it was a great amount of fun.
I thought it was a great mix of Star Trek Voyager specifics
with Trek Canon.
And I didn't clock the writer salad
at the beginning of the episode.
So I didn't realize that Larry Nemechek
had had something to do with this.
But it really makes sense.
Like somebody that gets Star Trek on this level,
pitching this as the concept,
is something that really adds up for me.
And I really enjoyed it.
How about you?
Man, I just love a D7.
Seeing that thing flying around.
Yeah.
And this version of it too looked especially good.
I think they really did it justice.
Yeah, I mean, what a surprise running into these Klingons
this far from home.
I almost think that this could have been expanded
to two episodes.
Like there was a lot here.
A lot of places you could have gone
that for single episode sake, you had to keep constrained.
Good performances.
It would have been a really interesting
like midway through the last season turn
to keep the D7, keep these characters
and have a big part of the last,
you know, 12 episodes of the season
be about them deconstructing this weird cult religion
that they were all raised in.
I think the reason I bring up the specter of like,
like the Phantom Limb that is maybe the cliffhanger
into the second episode is like,
you think of all of the adventures
that Voyager has been in, in the D-Quad.
Like, I kind of suspect that these Klingons
would be a little more haunted than they are.
Yeah.
Because they've seen some shit.
If Voyager has seen some shit.
Totally.
And if they've seen similar shit,
like I would expect them to be a little more shell shocked
than how they are.
Yeah.
Like I would have appreciated a read on the Klingons.
Like I understand it.
Like there's only so many dimensions of chess
you can play here. And I understand this, like there's only so many dimensions of chess you can play here.
And I understand this is why the Klingons are how they present themselves.
But like, to get a version of the Klingons that are maybe even more alien
than what they were expecting because of their experience.
Right, like what if like in the process of meeting each other at this point in the D-quad,
like Voyager has gone through a bunch of space
that cause their ship to have like Borg stuff in it
and other influences alien wise.
Like if the Klingons had a Klingons butt changed
as much as that kind of setup going,
that would have been such an interesting approach
to this story.
Yeah, I agree.
But that's just for our imagination, man.
Yeah.
Well, do you want to see if anything
peaks our imagination and the priority
we want to inbox, Adam?
Oh, those are real, Ben.
I believe they're real.
Priority one message from Starfleet coming in
on Secure Channel.
Need a supplement link.
Supplement.
Supplement.
Supplement.
Yeah, it's extra.
By the interest alone,
could be enough to buy this ship.
Our first P1 is of a promotional nature.
Goes like this.
Hello, Ben and Adam and the FOD community.
Just wanted to give a shout out to the fun,
supportive collection of food nerds we call
the Greatest ExoCooks on Facebook.
Without their support, I wouldn't have started
my blog side project, cheflennitour.com,
which is a collection of self-guided food tours in and around NYC.
If you two had a food tour that you could do, what would it be?
P.S., Love Factory Seconds, and the Green Onion Song bit.
Wow.
I love the idea of doing a food tour.
Man, that's a great question.
I'd say like barbecue is my greatest love as a food, but I wouldn't wanna do a tour of it
cause I just wanna eat all of it at the first place,
you know?
For a minute, you and I had discussed a concept
for a podcast that was like old timey
steakhouse and the significant old timey steakhouses of every city it seems
like every every city has one of these and they're all a little bit distinct
based on on where they're located it seems like and I love these places so
much like I love the darkness and
the booth-ness and the stakeness of them.
Yeah. All the spider webs up in the corners of the ceilings.
Yeah. I think that would be the sort of food tour that would interest me the most. Like,
why do I love these places so much? Why does everyone in every city...
You get really walking for a moment there. Yeah. I think they're just great. I think
that's what I would do. I think that's fun. I am not a celebrity, but if I ever got to
a point where like hundreds of thousands of people really gave a shit.
I might write a, here's a food tour of my childhood
and take people through the like, the restaurants that I still think of today
that are still open today,
that like formed my food identity.
And most of them are gonna be in in the Bay Area and a couple of,
you know, a couple of the most important ones are gone because restaurants go away and that's
just a part of life and a part of that business.
But the like burrito place that I formed my attachment to burritos is still open. There's like a pizza restaurant in like Berkeley in Oakland that does like Chicago style pizza
for some reason called Zachary's that was like a big part of my pizza awakening as a
child.
They do, you know, they do deep dish and not deep dish style.
And it's like a very specific, very Chicago, but also very Bay Area thing.
And there's like a couple of like Thai restaurants and Chinese restaurants in the Bay Area that
are like very, very important to me.
Hang Ahti Room, which I've taken you to in the Bay Area.
It's like the, they claim to be the first dim sum restaurant and Marnie Thai in San Francisco.
Also a very formative restaurant for me.
And not to sound like a fancy pants asshole, but Chépanisse would be like where you end.
Really interesting data point that our visit to Sketchvest, which included Windy this year, did not take us to the Hang-Nah
Tea Room nor to any Tiki bars this time around.
We were so busy the whole time.
Yeah, but what a spot.
What a couple of spots.
Good question, Chef Lanny.
Yeah, so the call to action here is join the fun Facebook FOD food nerd group the greatest exo cooks and take a look at
cheflennitour.com and
Next time I'm in NYC. I'm definitely going to do that
Ben our second priority one message is from Gabe Abbey Frank and Sophia. It is two, Sasha and Adam.
Their message goes like this,
congratulations on the birth of your daughter.
Though she was born in a hospital and not 10 forward,
Chief O'Brien and Keiko would still be proud.
We couldn't be happier for you and we wish you
many a fun hour watching Star Trek with her
as she grows up.
Live long and prosper.
Ah, that's so sweet grows up live long and prosper. Oh
That's so sweet congratulations Sasha and Adam I know that every couple truly wants their baby to be born in 10 forward, but a hospital is a good second bet
Just imagine all those episodes of Star Trek
You have a head. That's bonding right there. No No kidding fuck you dad. I like watching football
Our final be one today is from Quinn at Stibendon Adam goes like this
Hi guys riding high on the hand sanitizer seas
This may have already been answered
But with Voyager coming to a close, have you considered
transitioning commentary to Quantum Leap or X-Files?
Just trying to keep the money train rolling with love.
I like Quinn wanting to make sure the money spigot remains.
Do you watch X-Files very much?
X-Files is a late night syndicated show over the antenna airwaves for me
and I've dipped into X-Files off and on over the years and
God, I don't know if it holds up
Really? I rewatched it. I loved X-Files when it was out. Yeah, I'm gonna say I rewatched it like
when it was out. Yeah, I'm gonna say I rewatched it like eight or seven years ago and really liked the first
several seasons, but it's one of those shows that kind of like was so popular at a certain
point that it was like a little bit a victim of its own success where I think that the
smaller scale and the weirder tone worked better for it.
You know how moms always mispronounce things that you like?
Like how they always get it just a little bit wrong?
I just had a really powerful memory back to when X-Files was a thing and I had just come
home from a haircut.
I was still living at home.
Like I must have been in high school or something.
Yeah.
And my mom was like,
hey, you look just like Maldar
from that X-Files show that you watch.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
And I found it so painful. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Because that's not what I was going for and that's not what his name is. Yeah, you were going for Seinfeld.
Yeah.
Well, listen, you may not think you can do this, but Ben and I will get it exactly right.
When you write a priority one message at maximumfund.org slash jumbotron, we will pronounce it correctly.
We will get all your references.
And it goes a long way in supporting this show
and keeping the money spigot on that Quinn was referring to.
Indeed.
And their P1 message.
Hey, Adam.
Step in.
Did you find yourself a drunk Shimoda?
Incredible.
Drunk Shimoda.
Harry Kim.
Harry Kim is Voyager's stick man,
and yet he's finally met his match, hasn't he?
Did in your mind it go down
between him and that Klingon lady
before he visited Sixpay?
Was it like a, okay, I tried it,
and it's not for me.
Visit the sixth bay, like I don't like that she hurt my face
or was it a like, I didn't even get close to trying
and she hurt my face and I stopped.
The next time we hang out with Dr. Star Trek,
I'm gonna say this.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha.
You got it wrong with Harry Kim.
Harry Kim Voyager's famous stick man.
You know who should have been the guy?
Egypt.
Imagine.
Imagine Egypt who thinks he knows what sex is.
Who thinks BLT has a crush on him.
Imagine a Klingon actually showing interest in him
and what that would do.
Wow. It would have fucked him up in a really fun way. Yeah, that's my vote.
Man. What about you, Ben?
Yeah, okay. I'll join you on the Harry Kim square. That was well argued by you.
I think so.
I think, you know, I had knee-licks in my notes, but Kim, come on, man, you got this.
You can do it.
Also, if you're an actor,
that's a pretty fun show schedule for yourself.
Yeah, it's like a light lift
and it's memorable, like good stuff.
Agreed.
Good.
Good.
All right, Adam, that's it for today.
Let's figure out what next week is going to look like for us.
Of course, for that, we turn to gach.biz.game, where we keep the game of buttholes.
The will of the caretaker.
Let me tell you quickly about next week's episode.
It's called the void. Voyager is sucked into an inescapable subspace void,
which is inhabited only by other trapped vessels
battling each other for survival.
Doesn't Voyager know that they should avoid the void?
No.
He would think.
Yeah.
Jonathan Delarco is a guest star on this one.
What?
Yeah.
That's exciting.
Yeah, I don't think he's playing Hugh, but.
No.
All right, man.
Our runabout is on that corksbar square.
It looks like up ahead we've got his eyes uncovered square.
That's the Tamarian metaphor type of episode.
Mm-hmm.
And we've got a banger that would move us five spaces back
where we to hit it.
That just drops us on Square 19, that's nothing.
You're required to learn as you play.
Roll.
I'm gonna go ahead and roll.
Roll.
I rolled a two, which lands us on square 20.
Tula!
Did I win?
Hardly.
Ah, regular episode next week, but eyes uncovered square.
Still in play, my friend.
Yeah, sure is.
All right, that has been this episode of The Greatest Generation.
Much appreciated to all people everywhere who support it
by going to maximumfund.org.com.
Get ready for the Max Fun Drive coming very, very soon
on these airwaves.
We have some exciting stuff planned for the Max Fun Drive
and in the meantime, we should also thank
Wendy Pretty, our producer, who edits every
single episode of this show.
That was a great job doing it.
And herds the cats that are me and Adam.
Yeah, she's pretty great.
Pretty glad we got to hang out at Sketchfest with her.
And with so many real life FODs, you know, one of the big takeaways from that experience was like, how great of a fan community we have.
And my little hitch in my voice, my hesitation was referring to a fan community at all.
But it's substantial and they gather in so many places.
I'm talking specifically about the Discord in this case. So many people came
up to us talking about how great the Discord is at drunksmoda.com. And it's a place not
just to celebrate the shows. That's only a small part of it. It's about meeting other
fun people, making jokes, having watch parties, finding a casual encounter, all kinds of things happen on the discord.
It's good stuff.
Go seek it out.
Thanks to Bill Tilley, our card daddy, running social media stuff over at Greatest Trek on
any social media company worth its salt and many that are not worth their salt.
And with that we will be back at you next week with another great episode of Star Trek Voyager and an
episode of the greatest generation Voyager that's like man I'm glad we're
not paddling Megillum or some shit yeah Get me out of that. Cheers, guys. Wah-ah-ah-am. Make it so.
Make it so.
Make it so.
Make it so.
Make it so.
Make it so.
Make it so.
Make it so.
Make it so.
Make it so.
Make it so.
Make it so.
Make it so.
Make it so.
Make it so.
Make it so.
Make it so.
Make it so.
Make it so.
Make it so.
Make it so. Make it so. Make it so. it, got it, got it. What for, for us?