The Greatest Generation - Klingon Bar Mitzvah (S2E14)

Episode Date: June 8, 2016

When Riker’s daddy comes aboard, his sexual magnetism finally meets its match. After a few days of bickering, it all comes to a head in an American Gladiator match that gives Code of Honor a run for... its money in the racism department. What was Worf’s job interview like? Can the ship's three most socially inept crewmen throw a good party? Will Riker take Picard’s advice on a new way to get off? It’s the episode where Adam opens some cards of his own!

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Priority 1 message from Starfleet coming in on Secured Channel. Hey friends of Disodo. Before today's episode, we just wanted to take a moment to talk about the historic labor actions being taken by writers and actors in the American Film and Television industry. If you're a fan of the work done by the people who make Star Trek, we hope you'll join us in standing in solidarity with the folks who actually bring these adventures to life. Over the past several years, the AMPTP, the organization that represents the American Film and Television Production Studios, have reduced the profit from movies and TV going to workers. And in so doing,
Starting point is 00:00:35 they've attempted to weaken the labor unions that represent those workers. They wouldn't even engage the unions on many issues in their negotiations. And so a strike was the only course of action to take. Adam, Wendy and I have been having a lot of internal discussions about how best to stand with the unions and we are continuing those conversations in a dynamic situation. We're doing our best to understand where the picket lines are in these digital spaces,
Starting point is 00:01:01 and we would never intentionally cross one. With the information we have, we feel like we can do more good talking about and supporting the strike and continuing our show as planned. We'll keep you informed about what all this means for greatest trek specifically. Today we're making a contribution to the Entertainment Community Fund. This fund exists to help all the people whose livelihoods have been put on hold because the AMPTP refuses to negotiate
Starting point is 00:01:25 in good faith with the unions. It provides financial support for writers, actors, and all the thousands of laborers who make the shows that we talk about here and without whom we wouldn't have Star Trek to cast pot about. Those folks are all out of work because billionaires, company shareholders, and the executives of these companies don't want to compromise on the length of their yachts. We hope you'll join us in supporting entertainment workers in a challenging time, especially after they've already endured several years of challenges brought on by the pandemic
Starting point is 00:01:55 and season two of Star Trek Picard. We've set up a page where you can also contribute. It's at friendsofdecotoforlabor.com. That's friendsofdecotoForLabor.com. That's FriendsOfDecotoForLabor.com. Link in the episode description. Okay, now let's get on with the show. Here's to the finest crew in A Star Trek podcast by two guys who are a little bit embarrassed to have a Star Trek podcast. I'm your host Ben Harrison. I'm your other host, Adam Pranaka.
Starting point is 00:02:39 Try to insensereity. I don't think I like it. That was some real folksy intro when you did there. Yeah. What do you think? Do we open up another package of Star Trek cards or is that a tired bit at this point? I don't know. We have so many packs, I think we should probably get on that, so that we don't leave any unopened packs at the end.
Starting point is 00:02:58 Yeah. Do I remember correctly that you have a package Star Trek cards yourself? I do. I have an unopened box. I bought us both boxes. Why don't you open a card? What about that? You want to know why I have an offer to do that yet? Well, it's the reasons are twofold. One. If you had a Jaeger and I didn't,
Starting point is 00:03:17 then I would want to kill you. That is exactly, that is reason number one, is if I open up a pack and I get a biffie acre. Oh That's gonna be hurtful. That could damage our relationship and also I'm smart enough to know that I'm not gonna devalue my box of Star Trek cards by opening it. Oh, man Now I feel like a real dope Just kidding. I'll open the I'll open a pack Cut out the moment where I go find the box.
Starting point is 00:03:45 Okay. Duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh- Don't make me leave the show, Ben. All right, I have totally destroyed the value of this box. Box number, box number 5, 9, 4, 8 is the number. I was in the low 4,000s. You were right near the end of the run. That's probably where they put the Yagers in. They dumped all their unused Yagers in here? Yeah, like what are we gonna do with all these extra Yagers? I'll put them, just put them in the last few boxes.
Starting point is 00:04:33 Oh boy, I'm excited. Alright, I'm holding in my hand a pack of portfolio print straighting cards season. Series one, a pack of five cards five whole cards it's very optimistic that this is series one okay the card on top is in theory. Looks like a picture of Lieutenant Commander Data. He's got, he's got some circuitry overlaid onto his face, and he's holding a rose. Do you think that we'll have every episode of the series represented between these two boxes
Starting point is 00:05:23 by the time we've got everything opened up. I hope so. That'd be great. That'd be really cool. I mean, not cool, but... Then we sell the whole set on eBay and then we use that money to buy more boxes. Until we get that beefy egg. Do you think that our association with these cards increases or decreases the resale value? I think our association with anything the resale value. I think our association with anything decreases whatever's value it is we're talking about.
Starting point is 00:05:52 Card number two is lower decks. It is. Oh, I remember that episode. Almost entirely red. That's where you meet all the crewmen who are like wondering what jobs Riker is to post them to and stuff. All the lesser than's. Yeah, they don't have to be like wonder about what's going on on the bridge, but they never know.
Starting point is 00:06:14 It's a couple of hands with eyes and the palms. It's a very red card. Oh, I got a signature card. No way. Card number three is a signature card. It is a, it is a Klingon person. He is Sterling Macer, Jr. It's from the episode Birthright Part Two.
Starting point is 00:06:38 He played the character Toc, T-O-Q. Is that the episode where like Wurf has to accept discomendation for the safety of the Empire? You should look up this card. This guy, God, I do not remember him at all. Usually even minor characters like you'd somewhat recognize. But yeah. Usually even minor characters like you you'd somewhat recognize but Yeah, I think that these packs have given us some great options for people to invite the greatest young
Starting point is 00:07:12 Sterling nasa is someone we need to contact. I mean as long as he's not some weird therapist or Or a new age medical professional. Yeah, I think I think he seems like a cool hang Yeah, he's not naked on his card. That's good. It's a good sign. Yeah, I think I think he's he seems like a cool hang. Yeah, he's not naked on his card That's good. It's a good sign. Yeah, Sterling, Macer, Jr Unification part one is the fourth card. This is a really cool looking card It's a picture of the enterprise with a rainbow warp path behind it, cruising up to a much larger ship. Cool card. Oh, the fifth card is from TimeScape and it is like a 60s psychedelic, like it looks like a woodstock poster. It's really cool. It's got a it's got a cloud with a smiley face on it. It's pretty far out. That's a that's a famous image when
Starting point is 00:08:15 Picard like what is like time stop on the enterprise and there's a warp core breach and Picard goes and draws a smiley face in it. Oh, that's right. That's what that's from. Yeah, that's great. Great times. Good times. So you got a signature card in the first pack you opened and I got a signature card in the first pack I opened. They should emphasize that on the box.
Starting point is 00:08:35 I mean, that's a pretty cool feature. Very cool. Very cool. Well, that's pack one of my now destroyed box of Star Trek cards. I hope you're happy, Fair listener. This is season two episode 14, the Icarus factor. They're getting some weird readings on the engine readouts, and so they're gonna stop at Starbase Mount Gamma and Captain Picard's like, hey, like no big deal. We'll have everybody at Starbase Mount
Starting point is 00:09:17 Gamma, check it out. We're going there anyways, and they're like, what are you talking about? We have no plans on going to Starbase Mount Gamma, and Picard's like, oh yeah, we have like some urgent personnel changes that we need to make. And it turns out that this is an opportunity for Riker. Riker is being offered the command of a ship called the Aries that's going to some far-flung part of the galaxy to check out
Starting point is 00:09:45 some readings that may indicate a intelligent species out there that starfully wants to go make contact with. And you know it's like a it's a bittersweet moment because it means Riker's going to be leaving the show, leaving the ship, but it's also the you know it's the dreams that he's always had for himself, being command of a starship. The card has a great scene here when he gives him the news. He's like, you know, the man, I remember the first time I met you,
Starting point is 00:10:17 watched you manually dock. Remember how exhilarating it was to see you do that. See the way you told the crew to hit the buttons, to dock the ship. I knew that was a man who was command material. And here you are, being offered a command. It should have been so proud. That's the first time I met you when you watched
Starting point is 00:10:39 the part of the episode that you hadn't been in. There was a man who knew how to watch TV with the best of him. Yeah. That's when I knew you eventually have your own command. Your own marginal recap podcast. Yeah, and and Riker plays it real cool. Cool to the point where you really aren't sure if he's stoked about this or not yeah i mean he's like he's definitely flattered but he's not he's not like cool when do i start he's like all right well i'll need some time to think about this the way they they set it up is like yeah the areas is in like some far off part of the galaxy. They're, you know, they may have found life, they may not, who knows. We don't know. Maybe you can find out. Like it's just a real,
Starting point is 00:11:32 it's not a great sales job as far as the Aries goes. They talk nothing of the ship. The ship could totally be a Jolopy out there. Yeah. For all we know. Yeah, they should be like, it's a ship with six holodex raker. He probably wants to go look up the crew complement immediately. Like, how many chicks are on board? How many of them are married? Yeah, not that any of this is going to be limiting in any way. No. I think he's kind of a sexual omnivore. Yeah I agree. A wholesome hole. Yeah so you know in spite of all this opportunity Riker has not plowed every hole on the enterprise so it's not necessarily time for him to go yet and he wants to think it over but a civilian attaché is going to beam aboard to a brief him on his mission. Should he choose to accept it? And some like a little bit, a little bit of a misdirection here with the captain,
Starting point is 00:12:32 because Riker goes down to the transport room. And it's not just any civilian, Natasha, that beams aboard Adam. Oh, it's his dad. Yeah, Kyle Riker beams on board, looking exactly like Jean Roddenberry. Like, did you get that vibe from him? I don't know. Do you think it's a little weird that the dad of the most, the dad of the show's sexual icon looks so much like the creator of the show. I don't know. I never made the connection.
Starting point is 00:13:11 Yeah, and Kyle himself looks like an upholstered sofa. Like they gave him a onesie that is tragic. I think it's the same thing that they make the forangi wear, but it's on a much bigger man, so it just stretches out. He's rocking a lot of nuck in most of these scenes. He looks like a brown eggplant. Yeah. He looks like grimace in the McDonald's Land Gang.
Starting point is 00:13:37 Uh, beige grimace. Yeah. Uh, well, as much as that may be the case. Bage Grimis. Yeah. Well, as much as that may be the case, Riker is not excited to see him because Riker has big time daddy issues and we're going to learn all about them in this episode. Yeah, so he beams on board and he's like, kind of excited to see his son.
Starting point is 00:14:07 And Riker's like, he comments to the transporter chief. He's like, yeah, why don't you find a tour guide for this old man? I'm gonna beat feet and get back to work. Like, he's a total asshole to him, to his face. Yeah, a full blown weaponized asshole, I would say. Yeah. It seems so out of line because the, I mean, I don't know.
Starting point is 00:14:34 It's, this guy comes aboard, he's like friends with everybody on the ship, and Riker like had no idea. Like, Riker's dad banged Polaski in the past and Polaski has never mentioned it to him. So one of those things that they're like, they like definitely had this idea in the writers room, like, oh, what if like, you know, what if he's like buds with some commander
Starting point is 00:15:00 when he walks into 10 forward and then he turns and Polaski's there, chugging away on some hard alcohol as her want. Which she was. Yeah. She's got like a like a beer-stein full of vodka. And at a certain point, like, Rikers, like how do we explain the fact that you've never mentioned you had a sexual relationship
Starting point is 00:15:25 with my father and she's like, well, it just never came up. I think you gotta disclose that you at least know the guy, right? Yeah. I mean, Rikers' father has got to be like a sexual T1000. Yeah. We talked a couple episodes ago about like the fog machine and its use, but like, can you imagine the dust in the room when Kyle Reiker and Plasky bang, it's like clapping two giant erasers together. Yeah, well a lot of that's just dandruff, but I mean, and again,
Starting point is 00:15:59 we're meant to believe that Plasky's a sexual being. Yeah, hard to wrap your head around that too. In a science fiction show, that might be the biggest leap to take. Wow. Yeah, the undiscovered country, the final frontier, pelaski's sex life. Yeah, definitely. So like, they kiss each other on the mouth and and Riker is across the room and 10 forward just like I also thought that this is fun Riker is sitting there like bumming out with Chivo Brian It's like man like if there was one person on the ship that you wanted to have like a real like moody
Starting point is 00:16:41 Irish pub style drink with yeah, You've got the guy right there. So good. Nice choice. And like O'Brien just stares them down. Raker doesn't do that thing that's like, hey, check that out. But then like, look back. Like, don't make it obvious.
Starting point is 00:17:00 He doesn't do that. And for that reason, O'Brien never turns away. Yeah, O'Brien is not slick at all. No, no, he's terrible. He's a Jordy level of socially awkward in the scene. This is all happening. And at a certain point, Wurf is like trudging through one of the hallways
Starting point is 00:17:30 and Wesley, the boy, is like yapping at his heels. And it's like, Wurf, did you hear about Riker? He's going to another ship. He's gonna be the captain. He's gonna be a big boy now. And Wurf is just in no fucking mood to hear any of the boy's optimistic thoughts. Yeah, he's real scrappy to you at that moment. Everybody needs somebody.
Starting point is 00:17:51 Enough! Wurf is more being owner of the abandoned amusement park dressed as a ghoul, right? Right, right. Um, but uh, Wurf basically tells Wessley to get bent and go fuck himself. Yeah, he's a real grumpy guess. Yeah, and so Wesley wanders down to engineering to talk to Jordy. If anybody's ever in a mood, you want to talk to the most socially clued in person on the ship about how we might solve this problem.
Starting point is 00:18:29 And so this is the B storyline is Wesley, Jordy, and Data trying to figure out what's eating wharf. Yeah, much like Wes asking for relationship advice from everyone. He's just gone around and recruited people to figure out what's wrong with Wharf. And again, like two of the worst people. Yeah. Not Troy, not Riker, who's actually friends with Wharf.
Starting point is 00:18:56 Yeah. It's the guy who has no emotions, and the guy who might as well have no emotions given how poorly he uses them. The guy who in any other time period would probably be a serial killer. He's got all the signs. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:19:16 Torturing puppies, recalibrating deuterium injectors, everything. That's a biggie. So they do a lot of like, you know, what's what's going on with Warf at one point, Jury and Data are in 10 forward and they're looking across the way at Warf, who is just staring out the window by himself with his, you know, a lot of tension in his shoulders and data comes up with the idea that if it might just be that Wurf is lonely so he goes up and takes a real condescending line with Wurf which is like You seem to have lost the will to communicate with others
Starting point is 00:19:55 You have friends here and orp Asked data to leave and basically the funniest way possible Jordy Wesley and I were saying with I'll do respect Be gone good times the funniest way possible. Good times. This is, I think we've referred to this earlier in season 2, the all or nothing, Warf Exposition. Yeah. I mean, this is a pretty Warf-centric episode, to the extent that we have not gotten to
Starting point is 00:20:21 know Warf at all in season 2 up until now. Yeah. I mean, and it's funny, like, when we do get to know Warf at all in season two up until now. Yeah. I mean, and it's funny, like, when we do get to know Wharf, he's such an interesting character, like the time that Wesley went to ask him about, like, what it's like to be a Klingon in the Federation, and he talks about how his enemy is the difficulty he has with leaving his life in other people's hands and collaboration. I mean, like, what an interesting idea for a character to be like, he has with leaving his life in other people's hands and collaboration. I mean, like what an interesting idea for a character
Starting point is 00:20:47 to be like fighting through those kinds of issues and still like be one of the most capable people on the ship. That's something you must have glossed over in the job interview. Right. What would you say your weaknesses are, Worf? Pretty angry when doors don't open. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:21:04 The whole door thing is infuriating. I hate working with people. Yeah. I get shocked all the time. And where do you see yourself in five years? Dead, hopefully. The death of a warrior I think would be perfect. That'd be some awesome shit.
Starting point is 00:21:22 Yeah. We have a scene in here where a wharf goes and sees Riker and you know I kind of before I remembered what this was about, I thought that this was going to be about wharf bumming out because Riker is leaving and he's just real sad that his friend is being stationed on another ship and he even goes to Riker and asks, like, if you're going, can you put in a special request for me to come with you? Because, like, there's going to be some opportunities for combat potentially. And if we all go out there to our deaths, like, that would be pretty great for me. It's tough when your workout partner leaves you.
Starting point is 00:22:01 And I think that's what Warf is faced with here. If I had a lot of holiday bonding together. Do you think that Warf ever bonds with Riker and his holiday programs or is just a one-way type of deal? I think you'd have to. That's troubling, to say the least. I'm not going to speak. You're the captain, so very entitled. I'm going to type a rambulant about something everyone knows. This is like one of those episodes where we don't really leave the confines of these two stories.
Starting point is 00:22:33 There's some scenes where Riker's dad sexually harasses Troy. Yeah, and that scene Troy does not fucking take it. Well, she does not into that shit at all. You can see the light behind her eyes Just sort of go out at that moment like don't even try Kyle Kyle it's also such like a dad of the future name to there are no dads right now name Kyle Yeah, but in the future there will be yeah, they're totally will be like could you imagine a grandpa Kyle Grandpa Josh
Starting point is 00:23:08 That's gonna happen hard to to picture, yeah. I know. I used to be a vaping sea captain. Now I'm your grandfather. Oh man, we got such an angry letter about making fun of Captain Josh that one time. Oh boy, yeah, we truly did. I think we were called inconsiderate and mean. Yeah. I mean, like for the most hack overused premise that we've probably ever done on the show, which is making fun of somebody for vaping, like I can't think of a podcast that hasn't had some drive-by vaping jokes.
Starting point is 00:23:42 I had to go back and re-listen to that episode because I was like, there is no way we were as cruel as this guy said we were. Yeah. And sure enough, it was like a five second throw away bit. Yeah. And this guy, this guy wrote five paragraphs. Didn't work for that guy. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:23:59 Yeah. Well, he's off listening to Mission Log now. So he's in a much better place, I think. We should have cut it out, but only because it was like pretty... Hack. Hack. Yeah. Yeah, if a guy wrote a six-peri-grass about how hack we are most of the time, I think I would take that message for action.
Starting point is 00:24:18 That would be a sick burn. Yeah, I would respect that. And we know. I mean, we're a pretty new two podcasting and b, we don't script this out at all. So any heck jokes, like please forgive us. There's a reason where on the culture part of Maximumfund.org and not comedy. Because we might be one and we definitely aren't the other. Yeah, calling us cultures pretty generous.
Starting point is 00:24:47 Yeah. So they figure out what's going on with Wharf, and it is that it's the 10-year anniversary of his Klingon Bar mitzvah, and he's feeling really lonely that there's no Klingons around, because you're supposed to like put on a big party for your tenure and virtually. And so data, Wesley and Jordy, come up with the idea that they are Wurf's family. Wurf doesn't have any klingons to party with. So they are gonna put a holodeck klingon party together
Starting point is 00:25:22 for him and they're gonna go into like the cultural archives and find out just how you do it, which is a very sweet gesture. It's a bit like, you know, it'd be like me putting on a Passover Seder for my wife's family. Like, I'm sure that I would do many, many things wrong
Starting point is 00:25:40 because I have never put on a Passover Seder, but I think they would appreciate the gesture. They would not appreciate you hitting them with cattle pruds as painsticks. Yeah, I have a little visual tracking problem when I read, and I might get parts of the Klingon thing confused with the Passover thing. Yeah, they sort of set this stage for wharf in the holodeck and it looks pretty bad at
Starting point is 00:26:07 a, it's like a kind of a dungeon scene with a pretty clear path down the middle. And a bunch of platforms on either side of this path where they put holodeck clingons holding these painsticks. Yeah, and I think a Polaski, you know'Brien show up for this party. It's a good idea to bring the actor to a pain stick party. Yeah and you know O'Brien just loves Barmits was he doesn't miss him for anything. O'Brien is like trying to tell Leslie a tall tale about some animal he saw get totally obliterated by a painstake one time. The animals had exploded. I think that's enough cheaper, brides.
Starting point is 00:26:47 It's a lot of fun. I like this little late motif that they're developing with Krumin just telling Wesley like crazy shit and trying to get him to believe it. Because the doctor at this one is like, shut up. O'Brien's quickly developing into a really fun bit character. Totally. Like they're giving him nothing, but he's doing everything with it. Yeah, yeah. He's going above and beyond the call. He's he is gunning for that main cast role on Deep Space 9. He's doing great. Good job, Cole Meeney. Yeah. Good job, Cole Meeney, who the other thing I remember you from is being a cop in
Starting point is 00:27:27 Dick Tracy, the film. Oh, really? Yeah, he's a cop at the beginning of Dick Tracy film. And I remember that because it's the first film I remember going to see in the theaters. And I was really surprised to see a character from Star Trek in it. He's also a cop in Conair. Oh, shit, is he? Yeah. Nice.
Starting point is 00:27:46 Yeah, he almost has a card drop down him. Well anyways, Worf's bar mitzvah is, it involves him walking down this central channel as the Klingon warriors standing above him, hit him with the, the painsticks. I travel the river of blood. No! No!
Starting point is 00:28:07 No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No!
Starting point is 00:28:14 We just got an email from a listener who found his worth toy from when he was a kid, like the Worf Action figure, included some pain sticks. And he took a picture of these and they're just like comically dildonic looking in the in the tenor plastic representation of them. There is no other thing they could be besides giant dildos. Like, they must have like repurpose them from some hen-tie action figure from Japan, right? You know, like they're like, oh, we got a bunch of purple dildos that scale to being about four feet long.
Starting point is 00:28:47 What are we gonna do with them? I don't know. Throw them in with the warf toys and make them painsticks or something. Oh, man. And this, he sets it up in a little diorama where it's like warf and riker, and they're both staring at each other,
Starting point is 00:29:01 holding these giant dildos. It's kind of a perfect scene. Yeah, it's like warf and Riker have made one holodeck program that they can both really get into. Imagine the scenes you could act out with those figures and those props. It's really beautiful. Yeah. So he just walks down the middle of this channel and gets, gets painstackified and
Starting point is 00:29:22 yells a lot of shit in English and cling on. The idea is that you're supposed to confide your inner most feelings at those moments. So you say something that's very personal to you and then you get stabbed. And then you do it again and again and again until you arrive at the end where John Tess, it's you with a pan stick, John Tess in Klingon, regalia, it's you with a pan stick. This is true, did you know this? It plays one of the Klingons in this scene?
Starting point is 00:30:07 Holy shit. Yeah. Entertainment tonight's John Tesh. That's great. Yeah. A true ET. Yeah. Oh God.
Starting point is 00:30:17 You know what I agreed to that after a process and now I'm disgusted with myself. Ha ha ha. I thought that was okay. You were a dad joking the shit out of this episode. Sorry. Anyways, he gets to the end and it's like it's like the end of a an SNM scene when the when the masochist like thanks the sadist for abusing them. He unzips the leather mask and finally takes a couple of breaths.
Starting point is 00:30:53 That was worth bonding with his crewmates and I felt real strange that Ryker wasn't there for this because a Ryker might be leaving soon and it'd be a nice way to like you know wish-warf well. Yeah, I should have been there, you're right. Their best buds! Doesn't make any damn sense. Just kept talking one long. Incredibly unbroken sentence moving from topic to topic.
Starting point is 00:31:18 So that no one had the chance to think the traffic was really quiet, not ignored. Yeah, well Reiker was busy engaging in American Gladiator style joust with his dad. Yeah. Yeah, so the Ryker and his dad argument come to a head and Kyle challenges Commander Ryker too. What is it? It's that jit kundoh. It's anbo Jujitsu.
Starting point is 00:31:46 Yeah, sport of the future. Yeah, which is you put on a bunch of miscellaneous hockey and baseball pads and then Luke Skywalker like you lower a blast shield over your eyes so you can't see what the fuck you're doing. The blast shield down, I can't even see how am I supposed to fight. And then you swing a big Q-tip at your dad. It's very important that you do this against your dad.
Starting point is 00:32:18 Yeah, like you can barely make out the fox racing logo in their in their motocross Yeah, painted motocross outfits. They like spray painted over it, but it's like a little bit raised on the helmet and Like they speak really broken Japanese to each other This scene may be more racist than Kodavonner. He just really, oh yeah, I was horrified. I mean, I'm just saying, I'm not saying it's not super duper racist. I'm just saying that Kodavonner, holy shit. Frakes over-pronounces the Japanese, like someone trying to heart it a sushi restaurant like
Starting point is 00:33:07 like it's really it's really gross. I don't know. It's give me out. I didn't like it. Fair enough. There's a bunch of glyphs around the stage, around and on the stage. Yeah. And I look that up. Those are like the those are the glyphs for like water and fire and earth and and wind. Earth, wind and fire. The band. Remember? Yeah, and they're they're winging cute tips at each other and delivering exposition in between blows. And what, what, what, when's it happening is that Kyle pulls a, pulls a cheap shot on Riker. Riker gets real like morally outraged and realizes that his dad has been defeating him in this sport, his entire life by using an illegal move. And it kind of embarrasses Kyle Reiker that he's been caught with this gambit.
Starting point is 00:34:08 He's like very competitive with this son and the only way he's been able to win all these years is by essentially cheating. Yeah, I mean, the conversation up to that point though is like about who loved Riker's mom more. Riker was a, Will Riker was a kid when his mom died and he's super pissed at Kyle for how that all went down in the aftermath and Kyle's like, she was my wife, I loved her more than you possibly could, you were just a little kid and diapers. Like don't, don't big dog me about grief. Right. And, uh, and Will Riker just can't get it through his head. He's, he's totally insulted by, by the aftermath of her death. That's some real shit, I feel like. I think families get in a lot of trouble
Starting point is 00:34:57 when they sort of griefier than thou other people in the family. Like, like, the way you're processing grief isn't the same way I process grief, so you're clearly being a shithead. Like I feel like that happens all the time and that's a reason for a lot of family conflicts. And you know, you would hope that by the 24th century or whatever that shit would be kind of ironed out. Look, I put your mom's body into a torpedo tube
Starting point is 00:35:26 and I shatter out in the space, like her final wishes were. Yeah. I'm not gonna do what baby Will Reiker wants me to do, which is like turn her into some weird hologram statue. Yeah, I mean, these are two dudes that sweat a mental health professional. And you would think that either of them would
Starting point is 00:35:46 have ever have talked about this to her and then sought some kind of professional help with it, you know. Well, yeah, and Ryker had a, Will Ryker had a bunch of chances as well in this scene, but he instead used that time for fucking because at one point in the episode right, Will Riker has made the decision to leave the ship and go to the Aries. Right. And so one of the goodbyes he says is to Deanna, he goes into her quarters and we know to feel sad in this scene because the music is beating us over the head with how sad the scene is.
Starting point is 00:36:25 She's a puddle of both tears and other things and riker holds her close when we when we cut back to the B story. But I mean, clearly they had one last rom before he takes off. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Good biceps can be very cathartic. Yeah, he pops off one last blast and then goes to kill his dad in the squared circle. Yeah. And so they reconcile at the end of their Q-tip fight. And I guess at this point, Will Riker decides not to leave the ship. He is flip-flopped on his decision. Right. I think the last scene is they're getting ready to pull out and, and Picard is like,
Starting point is 00:37:13 well, now that we don't have Riker here, we're going to have some adjusting to do. But let's, let's get the show on the road and Riker pops off the turbo left and announces that, So let's get the show on the road and Riker pops off the turbo left and announces that as an active self-interest, he's gonna stay aboard the Enterprise as the first officer. The end. I wish they'd cut to a wharf just like on like,
Starting point is 00:37:35 woo, oh thank God. Yeah, he's got to be pumped. The best he's sticking around. Yeah, wharf is right back to work after his pain's sticking too. Like evident Wurf is right back to work after his pain sticking too. Like evidently that didn't put him down for long. Yeah, he can take it. He's got to look like he's been through a paintball fight though.
Starting point is 00:37:55 Without any protection. Yeah, very black and blue. Yeah, totally messed up. Darmak, Angela, and Denaga. up. A Greatest Gen Live Show is something you don't want to miss. Why? Well, it's a great opportunity to see me and Ben in person, but that's not all. FODs from all over gather at these shows to cosplay, to do pre and post show hangs,
Starting point is 00:38:21 to make friends, and share their embarrassment. Hey, let's make a pretty great name for a tour. Let's do it. The Share Your Embarrassment Tour is coming in August 2023, and we've got a bunch of dates in a lot of great places. Go to GreatestGenTour.com to get more info. That's GreatestGenTour.com for dates and ticketing information for the Share Your Embarrassment Tour. I'm Jordan Morris, and I'm Jesse Thorne.
Starting point is 00:38:49 On Jordan Jesse Go, we make pure, delightful nonsense. We were open awesome guests, and bring them down to our level. We get stupid with Judy Greer. My friend Molly and I call it having the spaceweards. Pat Noswald. Could I get a Balrog burger and some air-gorn fries? Thank you.
Starting point is 00:39:05 And Kumail Nanjiani. I've come back with cat toothbrushes, which is impossible to use. Come get stupider with us at MaximumFun.org. Look, your podcast apps are open. Just pull it out. Give Jordan Jesse Goatry. Being smart is hard. Be dumb instead.
Starting point is 00:39:19 Oh, rice. Hey, hey, oh, I'm about to count you in line. These clouds are really freaking me out. I hate having to stand in line and boy, what do I? These giraffes do not smell good. No, they do not, and they've such short nacks. But I'm hearing we need to get on this off. We've got to get on the art.
Starting point is 00:39:36 It is about terrain, about a spout to destroy humanity. Hey, oh, sorry, sorry, sorry. Are you Noah? Yeah, I know we look like humans. We're actually, we're podcasters. We are podcasters, so it's different. Have you heard of Ono Ross and Carrie? We investigate spirituality, claims of the paranormal, stuff like that.
Starting point is 00:39:53 And you have a boat and say the world's gonna end, so seem like something for us to check out. We would love to be on the boats. We came to by two. What do you think? Ono Ross and Carrie, available on MaximumFun.org I thought one of my favorite scenes from this episode was when Riker is going to get Council from Picard about the decision to as to whether to take the command job or not. Yeah Picard's like, yeah dude it's pretty pretty bad as to be captain, I gotta admit. Like, don't tell anybody, but this is fucking great.
Starting point is 00:40:29 Yeah, he treats it like a secret. Which is kind of awesome. Like, hey, you'll understand when you're a captain, but, pretty cool. The key is finding yourself a young incident a groom. Yeah. Did you see a drunk Shimoda in your viewing? Drunk Shimoda!
Starting point is 00:40:53 I am going to put O'Brien up on the Drunk Shimoda board for the second episode in a row. This episode for his just kind of like being a fun guy who's like drinking around with Riker and then going to Worf's Bar Mitzvah party. Like he's just like, he's like not really there to drive any narrative or serve any function other than to like show up to the party and like do what is party appropriate at the time.
Starting point is 00:41:24 Okay. Good one. Yeah, I'm down with that. How about yourself? My choice was Kyle Reiker. To me, I think- Is it because his helmet fit so weird in that one scene? Yeah, that was weird. Yeah, in the Anbojujitsu scene, his helmet is totally cock-eyed.
Starting point is 00:41:44 Yeah, it's like, why didn't you guys fix that? It just looks so weird. Kyle Riker knows without question that he's been a strange from a son for like 15 years. And thanks for some reason, it's a good idea to surprise him. Basically, like the inflection point of his career. Like, this is a major deal. Riker's got a huge decision to make, he's got to be clearheaded about it. Oh, you know what I'm going to do? I'm going to personally help him through this.
Starting point is 00:42:13 My son who hates me. And that kind of like social blindness to me reads this incredibly shimoto-like. Like, you got to know the situation better than that, bud. So, I vote it's for Kyle Ryker. Come on, man. Stop pulling all those ISIL in the air chips out of your sun. Yeah, bad surprise, dude. Bad surprise.
Starting point is 00:42:35 What episode do we have coming up next time? Next episode is season two episode 15, Penpals. Data races against time to save the life of a little alien girl on a planet doomed for destruction destruction Do you remember this on? Well, I think anytime anytime you can combine a data-centric episode with a child actor, you got to do it so I don't remember this episode at all.
Starting point is 00:43:08 And I have no reason to. The sound's terrible. Kind of want to veto this. You want to veto this? Yeah, well, I'm thinking about it. I don't know. This sounds pretty crummy. I mean, and I'm not going to blame you for your your read on it. It's not your fault
Starting point is 00:43:26 But it when it help if I read it as Pekasbee It always helps when you're Pekasbee, but I don't know you see data is Racing against time to save the life of a little alien the old On a planet doomed for destruction. I'm your father. Oh yeah, that actually really helped. I think I'm excited to watch this one. I think I just saved the episode. He did. You becausebeat it away from danger, which is not something that becausebeat typically does. Which is not something that because be typically does. No, because be is usually the most dangerous part of the ship. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:44:09 Alright, well, let's do it I guess. I won't be telling you there, I like this episode. I am the cutest aboard. You will respond to my questions. I am the cutest aboard. You are a board. Well, you can follow us on Twitter. Adam is at Cut for Time. I'm at Benjamin AHR and our popular hashtag Greatest Gen is where most of all the fun chatter goes on every week. You can also find our Facebook group.
Starting point is 00:44:45 Facebook.com slash group slash greatest generation. We have two reddits. You got the mainline maximum fun reddit, which is reddit.com slash r slash maximum fun. And then you've also got slash greatest gen. Yeah, I would say if you've got good things to say, you use the maximum fun reddit page. If you've got criticism of any say, use the Maximum Fun Reddit page. If you've got criticism of any kind, you should probably take that over to its private Reddit account. And we're having a lot of fun over there, and I think you will too. Yeah, if at any time you feel like supporting the show, go to MaximumFun.org, slash donate.
Starting point is 00:45:20 And listen to the other shows on our lovely network. There's a nearly endless list. You've got Adam Ruins everything You've got Bullseye. You've got can I pet your dog? You've got Ono Ross and Carrie. Oh my god like I feel like we could list five great shows on maximum fun every show And we'd run out of Star Trek cards quicker. You could list 20 mackerel Roy podcast But I'll just say listen to a ton of Mackle Roy podcast Those guys are really funny. Yeah Well with that we'll be back at you next time with another great episode of Star Trek the next generation and also whatever this is we're doing our best Make it sound.
Starting point is 00:46:07 Make it sound. Maximumfund.org Comedy and Culture, Art and Stone. Listener supported.

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