The Greatest Generation - Loaf Death (ENT S4E15)

Episode Date: February 2, 2026

When some Klingons start experimenting with augment DNA, they start a pandemic and kidnap Dr. Phlox to find a cure. But after Hoshi gets melded and Reed gets thrown in the brig, the rest of the crew chase down a Rigelian ship and find the Entrepreneur has been sabotaged. What could push us into the physical-media lifestyle? Who is Trip Tucker’s Steve Stevens? Where do lady captains need to be careful? It’s the episode that’s going through some changes.Support the production of The Greatest GenerationGet a thing at podshop.biz!Sign up for our mailing list!Follow The Game of Buttholes: The Will of the Riker - Quantum LeapThe Greatest Generation is produced by Wynde PriddySocial media is managed by Rob Adler and Bill TilleyMusic by Adam Ragusea & Dark MateriaFriends of DeSoto for: Labor | Democracy | JusticeDiscuss the show using the hashtag #GreatestGen and find us on social media:YouTube | Facebook | X | Instagram | TikTok | Mastodon | Bluesky | ThreadsAnd check out these online communities run by FODs: Reddit | USS Hood Discord | Facebook group | Wikia | FriendsOfDeSoto.social Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Here's to the finest crew in starving. When it comes to my crew, you won't get any argument from me. This is a parody. Welcome to the greatest generation. It's a Star Trek podcast by a couple of guys just a little bit embarrassed about having a Star Trek podcast. I'm Adam Pranica. I'm Ben Harrison. Breaking news, Ben.

Yeah? The Paramount Plus subscription price. going up. Oh, really? The price of your plan is changing. Hmm. It may be feeling things that it's never felt before. It may be growing hair in places.

It's not used to seeing hair. I'll just paraphrase the copy they sent me in the email. Hey, so David Ellison is really struggling right now in just so many ways. And Daddy didn't give him enough allowance money. So we got to take it out of your pocket. Sorry. The very worst streaming app there is. And I don't, I mean, that's objective.

Like, that's just how it's rated and how people feel about it. Cool. Do they understand? I mean, that should be on a mission accomplished banner. Yeah. Behind you, Ben. in your studio. Yeah.

No, no, they don't. I actually do have that banner. I got that at auction a few years ago. Yeah, it's just another example of everything getting both more expensive and worse as time goes on. It does feel like that. Not us, though. No. The cost of a P1, the same for time in a merium.

The cost of our show unchanged. Still free for those who do not support. The support tiers are all the same. Yeah. I want to say, our quality has gotten better. The show is improving. We're not like a fucking streaming app. I think that your side of the show has improved pretty dramatically.

Mine is, you know, holding on at about 90% of average. You always had an SM7 over there. It took me a couple of seasons to get there on my end. You're right. But, you know, you're also becoming a... better broadcaster, becoming sharper and wittier. I'm getting duller, a little less quick on the draw, a little less insightful. Yeah, I mean, it's been said that steel sharpened steel, that's not been our experience at Uxbridge Shimoda. It's basically windy chopping into our

knives constantly, as if they're made out of plastic. Yeah, yeah. Man, well, thoughts and prayers to everyone who still has a P-plus subscription, that sucks. Yeah. I guess these things are all available on physical, right? If you want to get into the physical media lifestyle. I did not consider that at all. Yeah. I could be watching this on DVD.

Digital versatile disc. That sounds pretty fun. There's probably Blu-rays of Enterprise, right? Let me see. Did they ever do an HD physical release of Enterprise? I don't know. And why is the resolution standard Todd? I don't know, Margo.

Yeah, they dropped out on Blu-ray. Okay. And more than 100 people bought it in the past month, according to major internet retailer, which means a popular purchase in the context of recent, emails from various streaming platforms. I love this idea that with our remaining 10 episodes, we've decided to make an investment in the physical media of the property we're watching.

That makes a lot of sense. That's so us. It just makes me want to transfer to another show, Ben, without these problems. Don't transfer to the shiny new show with extra computer screens. Stay on this show. I don't know. You've been toiling in the engine room for time of mammarium. I don't know, man.

Maybe you can develop a convincing argument why I should stay as we summarize and review Star Trek Enterprise Season 4 episode 15. It's called, I mean, it borrows the name of my favorite t-shirt brand, Affliction. Got a free speech and guitar. I got an affliction t-shirt in a gift bag one time. And I was like, what do I do with this? I can't wear this. I don't have truck nuts. Please be honest with me.

Did you ever wear it? I never felt comfortable in it. Even inside your own home? This was like peak Ed Hardy when I got this. And it was like... I feel like you got to put on an affliction shirt and jack off, you know? Oh, I put it on and jacked off. Sure.

What haven't I put on and jacked off? Just an affliction shirt, Winnie the Pooh jackoff session. That's it to do with an affliction shirt. We're in a Klingon science lab. This is not a type of Klingen space we've seen much of over the years. Just a sort of workplace that a service targ will be seen wandering around in. Just let your targ come to work with you anytime.

That's supposed to be okay. I had a friend that worked in like a co-working space back in my New York days, brought his dog to work, dog friendly office, as far as he knew. And the dog ate rat poison in the corner. There was like rat poison out at the office. Yeah, for the rats. Had to go get the dog's stomach pumped. So don't bring your dog to work. Don't let your targ gobble up the to rat poison in the corner.

Hey, no one wants to go to the office. Why would you subject your dog to that? I think they want to be there? The prisoner that they haul in is definitely one of the people filing something with HR about the targ being allowed to wander around the office. He would also like to see The Magistrate. I mean, this is what happens when you report to HR. This guy, this guy fucked around with HR and found out that HR isn't there for you

when he's perp walked into this chair. and given an unconsensual IV full of ecto cooler. Yeah, yeah. He was supposed to be not put to death, but he is put to death. I mean, loaf death. Yeah. You see what his loaf is doing here? It's going through some changes.

It's charging a little bit more per month. Sure is. After the theme, Archerslog tells us that Enterprise is home for the Columbia launch party, which will double as the TripTucker going away party. And in Tripp's quarters, Tappala's come over to ask, why in the hell he's transferring over there to that ship out the window?

Is it actually because of her? Here's the thing that Tripp does here. Like, I understand he's hurting. But you can push back without pushing back this hard. Like, this actually alienates a person that he really cares a lot about. and basically he shoves her out of the room with what he says. This may come as a shock, but not everything in my life revolves around you.

Like, how is anyone to ever take that but to assume that the opposite is true? You know? That statement has been in so many arguments for so many people over the years, and it never wins any arguments. It does not win. Yeah. I have a good buddy who when I was moving to L.A., I was like, I had a lot of apprehension about it because I then and now would prefer to live in New York. And my buddy said, hey, man, I hope you do great in L.A. My one piece of advice, if you're ever in an argument with your wife about anything, do not ever even consider saying, I didn't even want to move here.

Just take that out of your vocabulary entirely. That will not win an argument that will only make everything worse. So how did it go when you said that in an argument almost immediately? I have followed that advice faithfully and proudly so. I'm going to hold on to my ticket. Like, I think it still has value. You think? As long as you're here, I'm going to put that ticket in a desk drawer somewhere and wait.

Well, to Paul, like my wife, definitely suspects something is up. But, yeah, out she goes. We cut down to the surface where Hoshi and Flax have just finished up a succulent Chinese meal. I was just going to say those exact words. What is the charge eating a meal? A succulent Chinese meal. Hey, look, I don't even want to say anything more about it. Google succulent Chinese meal, if you don't know what we're talking about.

and enjoy maybe the most delightful minute of YouTube video you may have ever seen. Yeah. I just learned something awful about my wife. Oh. Speaking of wives, this is a men's rights podcast, mostly. I think you'll agree. You know what? Rights and health are more closely related than you think.

There's a channel on our TV that is just all America's test kitchen programming. It's just, it's like the Baywalk. channel. That's pretty much all we watch around here. And it is frequently just stuck on that whenever. If we can't decide on what we're watching, that's just going to be the default. Anyway, there are entire episodes dedicated to styles of cooking. And one of the ones that we saw recently was Chinese cooking that you can do at home. And the chef was making hot and sour soup. And I was like, God, I fucking love hot and sour soup. It's so good. And my wife, My fucking wife says, I actually prefer egg drop soup.

Uh-huh. I don't know, man. I don't know if I can recover from that. Do you think egg-drop soup is bad? Like, I still love her. I just don't see any competition between the two. Oh, really? I've never even thought about having egg drop soup.

I've had it before and it's good, but like I've never considered not getting hot and sour of hot and sour's on the menu as the option. I think egg drop soup is sneakily like, one of the most caloric things you can get in a Chinese restaurant. It's like, it's an absolute bomb. Like, it's like the bloomin onion where you're just like, wait, it's got how many kilo calories in it? It does make me think of what it would be like to eat Odo.

Sure. So that's kind of fun. Yeah. I'm not trying to defend your wife. I'm just saying like, there are advantages here. It's caloric. It's slimy. Anyway, I've just been thinking a lot about Benck.

and how, like, when you've married an amount of time, you, I mean, you will be surprised constantly. It's one of the delightful things. I mean, hopefully it didn't turn you on her so much that you would wish she would depart a Chinese restaurant and be abducted. Yeah, I mean, they didn't fog the city street in such a way where you're like, oh, someone's definitely getting mugged here. But there's not, not an amount of outside nighttime fog where you feel completely safe in this moment as they're walking out of the restaurant. They got it to the amount of atmospheric

I would expect if this was about, oh, there is a budding romance here. Not like we are in a dangerous part of town and like a triad gang is about to set upon them. Two things happen in this scene when these hooded aliens emerge from the shadowy bushes. I love that Hoshi kicks first. This is great when they're stuck up.

Yeah. But also, the Foley work in this fight scene is absolutely crazy. It is like aluminum garbage can thrown against the ground for every punch. It is insane how loud these punches are when they hit. And God, Hoshi gets punched right in the face, like between the wickets, just straight on. She gets taken down, and in her last remaining moments of consciousness, she sees an energy weapon, and it gets shot right at Dr. Flock's, and then she's done for her. She's K-Oed. And I've got faith of the far heart.

Legally, it's just a far joke. We're at the aftermath of the fight. Archer is on the scene to find out what the fuck happens. We meet Commander Collins Starfleet Security, who is like doing what I was expecting to be like the beginning groundwork of an entire character. Like I was like, oh, cool. Like this is going to be like the cop that is on the case and like has to like be secunded to Starfleet so that she could come help them find out what happened in this abduction. You get this new character here. You also get a brand new way of cutting together a sequence.

I found this scene straight out of like homicide life on the street where you're getting like cuts in the middle of words being said sometimes to different angles. Yeah, very dynamic, very different from the way they usually do it on this show. Yeah. And like that dynamism and the stylistic shift made me feel like, oh, we're in a genre episode and this is going to be like a stone cold who done it. Yeah. And Archer is going to like buddy cop with this commander Collins lady.

A commander Collins who is like, hey, I'll let you know if anything comes up in my investigation, you'll definitely be hearing from me. And I lean back in my chair and I'm like, oh yeah, we're definitely going to hear from her again. Nope. These people weren't speaking English to each other. One thing we learn. Another thing we learned is that they used a transporter, which is very rare technology on earth, not something that just anybody has access to. So what the fuck was going on here? What kind of high-tech shit did Dr. Flax get into?

Archer tells Reed, here's what you're going to want to do. You're going to want to check the satellites that Starfleet Ops uses to see if we can't figure out what the deal is with that transporter. And if there were any traces that were left behind that we could use for this investigation. The one person they're speculating about was the guy that steps to Flax in the bar last time they were on Earth. And everyone's like, that guy seemed like a drunk. drunk idiot, not like a high line abductor with access to extremely advanced transporter technology. He was way too dumb for this.

But it did remind me of the response to fear that Dr. Flax has from time to time that we didn't see in this moment. When a mugger pulls out a phaser on Dr. Flax, I'm kind of expecting the blowfish face. He should explode. Yeah. His whole fucking body should swell up. Oh, well. Cut over to the USS Columbia engineering space, and it's Triptucker's first day of work.

And he's doing that department meeting you have when it's your first day leading a team. And he is not feeling great about how ship-shape things are at that exact moment. This bucket of bolts was supposed to leave dry dock six months ago. And even more, unfortunately, is that he's got a Seth MacFarland working for him. He does. And I mean, we know that this guy was stationed on Enterprise and is therefore one of the other people in Starfleet with a lot of like logged hours with an active warp five warp core.

But it is never treated as like, like, this is like the guy that I brought over, you know. Nor is it treated as as its counterpoint, which is like the idea that Seth McFarland's Rivers character is like obsessed with. with Tripp Tucker and a like, I just want to be like you, man. I even use an affected accent to sound more like we're from the same place. You know what I'm saying? There was a guy on Lower Deck,

so it was obsessed with Ransom that could be a comp for maybe what Seths McFarland's reverse character is supposed to be. Yeah. Because we're best friends, and we share a sacred bond. You have to stop saying that we have a sacred bond. I feel it, sir, and I know you do too.

like use, use that. Use the fact that we've seen him before for something. Seth McFarlane can go broad. I know that might surprise people to hear as a, as a characterization of his acting ability, but like, I was a little surprised that they didn't give him more to do with Rivers as a character. Yeah. We also catch up with Captain Hernandez, who is a little miffed with Tripp. She comes down to engineering and is like, like, what gives you? Came on board and started bossing around people in engineering without even like getting the permission to come aboard or checking in with the captain or anything?

Yeah. Strange choice, trip. Yeah, and also you're actually not observing uniform code with both your earring and your patch saying enterprise on it. Why don't you swap out that patch? And once you do, come have dinner with me in my mess. I kind of thought I might be the captain.

I am also decorated. Do you think you have to be careful when you're a lady captain and you invite someone over for dinner in case you say something accidentally? Like, why don't you come over and eat out of my mess? Hey, Tripp, you want to come have a slice of my special pie later? I think there's a good chance. Yeah. Over on the Enterprise Clarinette's rental closet, Archer has been pacing and waiting for news about the investigation in the doctor. Dr. Flux is kidnapping, but that news hasn't come.

When Topal comes in, Archer springs a surprise request on her. Hey, you're a Vulcan, right? Maybe you can do one of those hands-on-face things to Hoshi. Hoshi a person who doesn't quite remember with perfect clarity what happened during the mugging. Maybe we can get a clearer picture of what happened to her. And Tepal's like, not all Vulcans know how to do that. Like, I'm actually a little bit offended that you assumed that I would. And Archer's like, don't worry about it.

I had Syrac in my brains for a day. That means I'm an expert. I can help you through it. I actually have a little bit of game in that department. Yeah. I picked up a few tricks. He's like the dodge ball coach in the wheelchair from the movie Dodgeball. Like, he cannot do, but he can teach.

If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball. What? I mean, yeah, that's the... derisive against teachers is like those who can't do teach. But he literally can't do because he doesn't have telepathic abilities. Yeah. Yeah, that'll be fun later. In the armory, no fun to be had, as Reed is working on the satellite homework he was given by Archer,

when he notices that one of these satellites would shut off for some reason for maintenance at the exact moment that flocks was kidnapped. And fortunately, the satellite has a... customer service hotline number listed on it. So he goes and blows in a call, but the guy that picks up is not really what he expected. No, I mean, I don't think you expect head-to-toe leather

to the guy picking up the FaceTime when you're just trying to call about a satellite thing. Right. You're like, I'm expecting this guy to tell me to like unplug it and unplug it back in, and he's in head-to-to-weather? Like, what's that about? I mean, it gets worse.

This stranger in head-to-toe leather invites readout to meet him in San Francisco at some address that he will give him in a moment. And when a dude in head-to-to-leather invites you to a mystery address in San Francisco, you better take a good fucking shower before leaving the house, right? Something like that. Speaking of getting more intimate than we expected, Tepal is attempting to meld Hoshi Sato. I imagine the like face bruise meld is is a tough one, right? Like, like, Hoshi's got like a big welt on her cheek right where Tepal's fingertips are pushing. I totally misinterpreted this moment. I didn't think the face bruise was from the mugging.

I thought it was because DePaul was screwing up the mind meld. Oh, I'm sure. Man, I like your interpretation. I had no, I did not consider that as a possibility. Because it looked like a rash to me instead of like. something that happens when you bash your face on the ground. I don't know. Is it a rash or is it road rash? That's the question. Yeah. The attackers were speaking Rigelian. This is what comes out of this melt. Like Hoshi heard them talking to each other,

not in English, but she didn't catch what they said. What they were speaking was Rigelian, and we learned pretty quickly that a Rigelian freighter left orbit pretty soon after the abduction. So we're starting to put a timeline together. Legally, it's just a fart joke. You will never take the greatest chin alive. Ben would rather die. What? Back on the bridge to Paul tells Archer that this freighter had a two-hour head start.

Yeah. So Archer's like, all right, we got to cancel shortly. You've got everyone back up here because we got to scoot. We got to talk to the mysterious Admiral Gardner about this. Yeah. and get everyone back on board. But Reed, holding everything up, is down meeting his leather zaddy friend in San Francisco. Yeah, I mean, it's night.

Reed is there to meet an anonymous contact emerging from the shadows. This guy we learn is Harris, and he was the one that shut down the satellite. He needs Reed's help. If Reed doesn't help, that's going to put Flox's life in danger. and there's some implication here in this conversation that Reed was in Section 31 at some point and Harris is right now. And once you're a sect, you're a sect all the way from your first cigarette to your last dying day. Saving Flox's life is Reed's assignment. Does this Section 31 movie change how you feel about Section 31 forever?

because there was a moment when a Section 31 storyline on Voyager or on Deep Space 9 was like serious business to be taken seriously. Yeah. And now it's almost a joke. I'm maybe the only person in the world that's watched that movie all the way through three times. God. Man, that is really hard to justify. I couldn't tell you one thing about it. So I'm just going to go ahead and say no.

I don't really consider it in a case like this. Yeah. It wasn't even a twinkle in the screenwriter's eye at this point. Got to cut over to the Klingon Laboratory from the cold open. Kvaa is watching more ecto cooler get manufactured and tested when Dr. Flax is brought in. And it's clear that Dr. Flax is brought in not to be a, I mean, a prisoner. He's there to kind of run this show. I will do nothing of a kind.

Then you will die. Interesting backstory with these two guys. Dr. Ontok met flocks at a conference a long time ago, but like in disguise as another type of alien because the Klingons weren't invited to that conference. And what we learn is that there is a horrific pandemic plaguing the empire. Can you imagine how bad a Klingon disguise might look in a, situation like that, like at a conference, like, hairpiece over the loaf, like, like,

sticking out very far. They're not going full ash Tyler. Yeah. If it's just for like a weekend. No. Like, oh, you're saying a bunch of doctors are getting together on RISA to get further advanced education and you need reconstructive surgery to go blend in. Ha ha ha ha ha, good luck.

Yeah, really weird this connection between this doctor and Dr. Flax. Evidently, they really hit it off back then, and it made Dr. Flax the perfect candidate to lead this research. And begrudgingly, Dr. Flax gets to work. There's a pandemic that is threatening all of the warriors of the Klingon Empire, and they need Flax to figure out a cure. And Flax is like, Hey, like, you could have just asked.

They're like, that's not really how we do things around here. You might have said no. On Enterprise, they followed the freighter's warp signature to where it ends, and they're about eight hours away from where they need to be. Archer Radio is down to engineering to ask Commander Kelby, who is the replacement for Trip Tucker, and who looks like Anthony Soprano to me. They need more speed, but at 105% efficiency, there's really not much more this guy can do.

He is slow to pick up the phone and doesn't have the same gung-ho, we'll make it happen, Cap'n attitude of Trip Tucker, and just makes me hate the shit out of Commander Kelby. Yeah, it's too bad. Real no-win situation for Kelby here. Dinner time on Columbia, though. We're in that captain's mess with Hernandez and Tripp, and Hernandez stole the ship's chef from the USS Republic, and this chef is cooking almost as good as the one on Enterprise. Trip is impressed. Pretty serious biz to impress Tripp Tucker, if you're a chef in Starfleet. Hernandez starts talking to Trip.

I mean, like, interesting, this scene right on the heels of the last scene with Commander Kelby, because, like, that is our first introduction. to Commander Kelby. And it is like Archer trying to call him up and him being slow to answer the phone. And now Captain Hernandez is also kind of displeased

with Tripp and the way he's treating her crew. Quite an impression you've made commander. He's riding the shit out of them. They're asking to be transferred to other departments. And he's saying like, hey, like, we got a lot to do to get this ship ready to go to warp

in a couple of days. And this is what needs to happen. Hernandez is like, yeah, a bunch of people want to transfer away, but like, Rivers actually asked me to like change his schedule to work every shift with you. He said that you wanted to bunk with him, is that? Kind of wondering about the you and river situation here. I really wasn't expecting it. He kept saying he wanted your new uniform with the correct shoulder patch to also have short sleeves so that he could, quote, see your forearms? Do you know anything about that? You're never going to let that go, are you? And also, he wanted your old uniform just to have it. His answer is pretty candid when asked about why he'd ever want to leave Enterprise, speaking of transfers.

He wants to be in a workplace that doesn't cry about being a family every time the layoffs get announced. And that made sense to me. Sometimes it's easier to work with people who are just colleagues. So Paul is having a little meditation moment and she goes to this matrix-like white space where she finds Tripp and they have a little interaction about like, what are you doing here? This is my meditation. Why are you in it? Tripp's like, I'm going to burst. Please leave.

Exactly where am I supposed to go? Trip does not bust. Meditation over and we cut to him in engineering aboard the Columbia. And it's clear that that was like a real telepathic moment that they shared, despite many light years in between them. Pretty wild. Pretty wild to be with to Paul one second and then open up your eyes and it's Seth McFarland, handing you a report before walking away.

It's like, it's like in a movie when the main character thinks he's like making out with a beautiful woman and then wakes up and it's a dog licking his face. Yeah. DePaul's woken up too over there in her quarters and it's just in time too. Enterprise has arrived at the coordinates of the Regelian freighter and out in space we see that it is not in good shape and everyone is dead. This place is a tomb and all of the bodies are Rigelian.

crucially. Yeah. No donobulence aboard this dead ship. And we got to identify the weapon signatures. There's an interesting moment where we actually see the screen that Reed is looking at saying weapon signature confirmed. And he's like, yeah, just have no idea what cut this ship up. Couldn't tell you. Ben, is Reed dark Reed now?

Did Reed just become interesting as a character? I am shocked to say yes. Oh my God. I never thought this day would come. Were those letters that he was writing to all his past girlfriends, just like pieces of a code that had to be reassembled later by experts in 31? It makes me reevaluate every moment we've ever had with him. Oh, man.

Truly. Really good. Incredible. Fox is making some progress on his research, but he would like a database from someone who has studied this particular virus before. And it's like a flu from some planet. And he's like, there's got to be like research databases. They're like, yeah, actually we stole all of them. We have those for you.

So go ahead and take a look at all of that data. Dr. Flax is like, why didn't you just ask for them? And he's like, we were afraid they would say no. Flax is like, man, I thought you Klingons were honor boys. I thought you were all nasty little honor freaks. And he's like, I don't really give a shit about that. I'm not in the warrior cast. You know what's honorable about this group of Klingons is their feelings about

euthanasia. Because when they haul in an infected prisoner, Flax is like, whoa, I don't even have a mask on. Like, are you serious about this? This man's been infected. Very observant. They're like, hey, stage one is a stage of this thing, not transmissible. You don't have to worry.

I mean, you'd have to get blood and guts on you from this guy to catch what he's got. And it seems like that's very likely to happen when a phaser is pulled out. Set to euthanize. Yeah. On this guy. What do you think you're doing? Euthanizing him. Out of the question.

Flax tries to intervene. He's like, no, man, this is not why I got into doctoring. This is no good. But they shoot this dude. And we cut back to Reed. And he's working on, I guess what he has claimed is he's working on determining the weapon's signature of this wreck. But he's using this time to call back in to his left. other daddy. And he's like, hey man, like, what am I supposed to do about this? Why did they shoot this ship?

This seems insane. And they're like, oh yeah, like the Klingons had to cover their tracks. So they got flocks out of there and they killed everyone to like cover over where they'd been. Reed's starting to get uncomfortable with the heat here. He's like, look, lying about one thing once to your captain feels a certain way. But like, this is starting to become a path. with me, a pattern that I'm uncomfortable with, like, how much more lying are you expecting me to do? The answer is a lot more, and almost constantly is what the expectation is. And also, these things that we do together, out in the dark, in the park, wearing leather, that's got to be a secret between us, okay? I'm being compromised, sir, and I don't like it. But I suggest

you adjust your comfort level, lieutenant. Reed was 31 before he was on Enterprise. So that's where his fucking loyalties better lie, buddy boy. Yeah. A banger interrupts this conversation. And who is it? What is it? A Klingon bird of prey doing

strafing runs on Enterprise. And they are almost immediately boarded. These Klingons shoot someone in the hallway and start heading in a particular direction that leads them up a Jeffrey's tube shaft. And we get a good look at one of these.

guys and very strange look to these Klingons. It's not like anything we've ever seen. Not since the 60s. Has a white actor been put in makeup this dark? It's very exciting to see it again. There's a real Jesus Christ quality to these folks as they're running around, like between the hair and the very dark skin pinkmentation.

Yeah. And the eyes that seem to follow you around the room, wherever you are. It's really something. The eyes that seem to know when you're masturbating. Yeah. One of them acts as a computer workstation for something mysterious. And like they're trading fire with Makos as they move through the ship. At the very end of this firefight, one of the smooth head Klingons blows in a call to their ship,

and he has them target the Makos location on Enterprise. after some pretty big bangers get dropped, they transport back to the bird of prey, and they go to warp. This was crazy. I don't think we've ever seen this in Star Trek where, like, a ship shot a part of a ship, hit it, so that guys in that hallway got hurt, so that guys at the other end of the hallway could get away from that.

I mean, we find out later, does this not represent a augmented and improved level of thinking and strategy? Yeah. Yeah. So we go to Six Bay and they did manage to tag one of these dudes and he's tied up on a bioped, but he will not talk. And he's cling on, but they're like, are you making their culture your costume or what's going on here? All of this makes me very uncomfortable is what Archer says basically. Baculous, like, it's a good thing that I'm doing this show at a time where like stuff like screen grabs don't exist. There isn't a big like social media thing to happen where like I'm seen in the same scene as someone wearing Klingon face. And people are saying like we can't imagine being on this set and not speaking up about what's going on.

Bacula fails purity test. We cut to a McLaughlin group on the bridge. Issue one. Where they're talking about like, who are these guys that say they're Klingons? And what the fuck is wrong with them if then, in fact, they are Klingons? They did something really messed up to the engine

and we're not going to have warped for six more hours. Yeah, that's a long time when their mission is to find a Dr. Flux, who they believe is on a ship zooming far and fast away from them. We cut back to Earth where Commander Collins from Starfleet security is sifting through

some files on her desk, just going like, God, I have no idea where that guy got abducted to. And we cut back. Did they damage anything else? We don't know. Yeah, we don't know at this point.

We got to figure out what they wanted on this freighter. Like maybe the black box will tell us at least what kind of ship cut it in half. And we kept back to the lab on the Klingon colony, where Flax is a little annoyed, again, that there's a Targ just walking around the lab. This is Antox Targ, and he just loves a little guy, doesn't he?

Yeah. His first patient. Yeah. Dr. Flax takes great umbrage with the idea that he has found augment DNA in this virus they're studying. How did that get in there? This virus was an attempt to take all of the great things about the Kanun-Yen-Soon augments and apply them to Klingon genetics.

And this was what this doctor was working on. And it didn't work initially, but then one of the test subjects got this flu. And it like, the combination of the augment DNA, and the flu, co-mutated to create this new virus that is now tearing through Klingon society. And it became clear to me in this moment that this is writing directly toward that moment in Deep Space 9 when they go back to 60s Star Trek. They are Klingons. And it is a long story. What happened? Some kind of genetic engineering? A viral mutation? Would you not discuss it with outsiders?

They're like writing toward, like, we need to like solve a canon problem. I was actually really impressed with this retcon and how elegant it hung together. I thought it really made a lot of sense. And I think maybe mostly because of course the Klingons would want to dabble in this shit. Like how exciting is the prospect of Super Klingons? Super Klingons is so fun. That's like, I mean, that seems like what Veclar is, right? It's like a cling on only more so.

Yeah. I won't cease or desist Because you really think it's fair use. Back on Enterprise in the situation room, Topal and Hoshi have got this Rajelian data recorder on the table. And they talk about the weird dreams that they've had, sort of as an aside. And Hoshi admits that she had a dream very similar to the one that Tepal had

that Trip was in. There was almost a romantic quality to it. I don't ever remember dreaming about Commander Tucker before. But this deeply stupid conversation about dreams is interrupted by the sound of an alarm. And this alarm is the scanner working on this thing. It's found something. Yeah. They report to Archer that Reed erased the black box.

And they go to read. and he's sticking to his story that the Orion's were the ones that killed this Regelian freighter. But Archer knows better. He knows about this gadget that they found in like a locker that only he would have had access to. Archer's like, if the scanner fits, and then he like throws it at his feet, wear it. And the camera pans down and Reed has like these tiny, dainty little feet. That fit right into the scanner? Yeah.

Yeah. It's not expecting that. Reed respectfully refuses to answer any more questions, and Archer opens the door and tells the Mako outside, like, take this bozo to the brig. He is relieved of duty. There's something about the amount of anger a person can have when they can't even look at you. That is so much more aggressive than someone

angry looking directly at you. This take by Bacula here where he backs up against the wall in here and is like absolutely steamed. Great take. Great take. Super pissed. Yeah.

We cut over to the brig where Reed's been taken. Clearly a place he'll never break out of the way Archer could easily and constantly. Archer shows up to tell him that the ship's heading into Klingon space could really use Dr. Flax's location.

about now, you know, to keep everyone safe. But Reed doesn't know. And this is the truth. He really doesn't. He's not working with the Klingons. But Archer has no reason to believe anything but that. Reed has no credibility. He's like, Reed, who the fuck could you be working for but them?

And Reed can't say he has higher obligations. I can't say anymore. You haven't said much of anything. Which, saying nothing is better than saying that, I think. Yeah. Like, I owe my allegiance to someone else. I can't tell you who that is. Ugh.

Say nothing, Reed. Like, to the Pope or like, what do we talk? Archer twist the knife here in a way I found surprising. But then maybe I shouldn't because Dark Archer goes to these places. He's like, hey, what would your dad think of you now? Yeah. You know, your dad who was in the Navy? He was a great seaman.

What would you think of you? You're bad seaman. He'd probably. hate your guts. Yeah. Archer dismisses the Mako that's in there. It's clear that this is tearing Reid apart. Reed is not having a great day. I have never appreciated Dominic Keating's performances as much as I do maybe in this exact moment. Like, I think because he's given a chance to show some real pathos here. Yeah. I thought this was really well done. And I think the, uh, the barrier to entry on getting on his level is so much greater because read has been a character that has almost

intentionally been unknowable and unlikable throughout this series. So to like be able to overcome all of that to get on his level here, I thought was especially well done. I feel like if you're writing a show Bible and you're like creating a character that has a dark secret, you would write and read the way you have written him the entire time. This feels like it is like a really elegant retcon of Reed in the same way that is a really elegant retcon of the Klingons. Yeah. Like it feels like they are solving

two huge problems that this series has had in one fell swoop in a very interesting way. I was really impressed by both parts of that episode in that way. Back on the Klingon colony, we learned that

the High Council is systematically destroying planets that have had this outbreak and the fleet is five days out. So we're working on the timetable here. Massacring the victims? The council will do whatever is required to contain this outbreak. The doctor wheels out the TVVCR combo and he's like, you want to know what we've been

doing with these settlements and he pushes in outbreak. Specifically the cold open scene. So we got a bunch of Klingon helicopters dropping daisycutters. on these settlements here and it's happening all over the place. We need to stabilize the DNA in the virus and Fox is like,

I don't know, man. Like, I think that at this point I've seen enough that I got to wash my hands of the whole thing. Like, you've abducted me, you've forced me to work on this, you're like euthanizing guys in front of me. I think that like my oath as a position

prevents me from helping you any further. and I'm going to stand on business. Kill me if you must. Good for Dr. Flax, but he's going to get a lot of hot pink blood on his hands if he quits now. That's because maybe if he developed some cling on augments in the next five days, the next settlement wouldn't be destroyed. What do you think about that?

No way. Yeah, he's escorted out of the lab by a guard. We go to the Columbia launch. Their bridge is the Enterprise Bridge, but with an added stanchion with some computer screens in the front and some added lighting to mimic the pulsing of the warp core in the back. Those lights on the bridge seem like a good idea for day one. But holy moly, you know the crew is going to start hanging jackets on those things almost immediately to cover them up. As a workplace, Columbia seems like a nightmare. Yeah.

They go to warp. This is their first time warping. And we cut back to the entrepreneur where Reed's cellmate is going to be the new clingogment that they've gotten back stabilized from Six Bay. And they have a conversation through this screen. And maybe the thing I hated most of this episode was them shooting through the screen at this actor. Because I was like, you can't see shit. Like, this doesn't look like fucking anything. Just like shoot him talking from the other side.

I don't like this at all. Yeah, I mean, there's that. And then there's also that they're talking openly, exactly about what they're doing on either side of this conflict in a way that happens so fast. Yeah. That it just seems a little bit unearned. He thinks Reed should have been executed.

Man. I mean, join the club, man. He also has a little cough. Like, he's got the disease, but they don't know that he has a disease because they don't have flocks. Right. A banger hits. And on Enterprise, they pick up the damage to their engines that despite their pressure.

Yeah. This is the sort of runaway train situation you get sometimes where, like, we can't slow down. If we slow down, we die. And Reed is like begging Archer. Like, you need a tactical officer right now. Like, I am here. I am willing to be that for you if you'll have me. And Archer's like, no fucking way.

Yeah, I don't see how Archer could ever. allow that to happen. You need to trust the guy. I mean, could barely trust him before. He couldn't hit the broad side of a barn with the weapon systems on Enterprise. And now we're forced to think back on all of those situations. Like, was that on purpose? Like, did he do that because he sucks or because he is like playing 3D chess? Yeah. In engineering, Topal has gone down there to help Commander Kelby try to figure out what is going on. And they're working at a computer station together where she's looking down and

Kelby's like, hey, what was going on on there? You see that? She did not see that. But then she looks up and it happens again. The Klingon stuff like flashes on screen for a second. Yeah. It's clear that there's some kind of Klingon computer virus going on. Topal tells Archer and Archer tells to Paul to fix it.

And from here it's a race against time because this pressure is building in the engines and the ship can only go so fast to relieve it before it reaches its top speed, right? We're just pushing the engines past the red line, and that is where our to-be-continued drops. Adam, did you like this episode of Star Trek Enterprise? I can't pay. Could for late. Got no case. Tap-dates.

We got to ship the size of the Chrysler building going out of control, Ben. I like this episode a lot, and it is for that two pieces of revision it's doing to both Klingons and Reid. I would have been thrilled at an episode that put effort into one of those things. But look at this app, accomplishing both efficiently and interestingly. I was pretty blown away by this episode for doing that. I am too. I think that this episode has a lot to pay off. Like,

sure. This is a pretty meaty first episode in a first part of an arc. And if it doesn't land the plane, it could be a disaster for Star Trek continuity. But so far I am fucking impressed with the way they are working these threads together. And, man, like, to me, like, I have not seen any Star Trek Enterprise past this point. If we take one step further, this will be the longest I've walked away from the Shire.

Wow. And I don't know if Tripp comes back, but like that's such an interesting tension in this. Like Kelby seems competent, but just barely. Like he's a replacement level Starfleet engineer, which seems like not who you want on the flagship. It seems like Tripp is who you want on the flagship. I'm interested to see if Kelby has like a real storyline. Or if it's just Tripp gets to come home because he's Tripp. My instinct is to kill Kelby and burden Tripp with that.

Like, I kind of want to load him up. Yeah. To make him regrets ever choosing his personal feelings over his duty. You know, his duty is to both please that booty and serve on Enterprise, you know? What are you doing? Well, that's kind of why he walked away. He was like, all I want is to please that booty, but she doesn't want. Me too.

She ain't won't it pleased. Do you want to see if there's any booty that wants pleasing in the Priority One inbox? Sure do, Ben. Priority One message from Starfleet coming in on Secured Channel. You need a supplemental income. Supplement. Supplement. Yeah, it's extra.

The interest alone could be enough to buy this ship. Going to start us off with a personal Priority One message. It's from Brad and it's to you and me. Okay. Message goes like this. Dear Ben and Adam, thank you so much for the pods. I've listened since season five of NextGen, and it's meant the world to me.

I recently came across this note in some of Mark Twain's personal items, though. You may agree that its provenance is more complicated. In honor of Mr. Clemens, can you please read this note in the voice, followed by the Brenner and O'Brien drops. Oh, and then, Is this, this next P1 is more, so I have to fucking read it in the voice?

Uh-huh, uh-huh. Yeah, there's a note here saying that the next P-1 is going to be that note. From the next of Benjamin Franklin, to my dear Lord Bacchus of River Tree, a naturalist worthy of the Beagle, and keeper of the sacred pool. May this missive express my deed. gratitude for your French. I have dispatched this note by rider to you on this. A.O. Birthday.

Though I know not when it will arrive. What mirth at the Philadelphia share your embarrassment tour? When your fountain-pinned note told Ben that whales nipples retract. Thank you for sharing this pod And for deep conversations Wise Counsel and fun adventures Though you dressed like Time Zero Just shot you forward

For Mark Twain's party I remain your faithful Bradford William aboard I'm Chris Brenner Brinner information systems You know, interface, operations, net access, channel 90. That Chris Brenner. I am Chief Miles, Edward O'Brien.

This is fucking spectacular. Thanks so much, Brad. I feel like that was a gift to me and all FODs everywhere. I'm so mad at you, Brad. So mad. I really feel like I was really, like, faking it for the first half of that. And I like... When you started to feel it, huh?

I slipped into a group. that I hate. Yeah. I hate the feeling of being like stuck, you know. It's like you took the wrong exit off the turnpike and you're like, I don't know where I am. Fuck. I think you're really good at that, Ben.

Maximumfund.org slash jumbochron is where you go to write messages like these and doing so supports the production of our shows. They really do. And we have a lot of inventory available on the greatest generation coming up. So a rare opportunity to get a timely P1 presents itself to you now. What will you do? Yeah, we've got remaining episodes of Enterprise happening and the go back around to the beginning of Star Trek the next generation, Ben.

Crazy pants. Or Baywatch, depending on how the poll ends up. There will be an audience-determined outcome to this. It's great. I love the mystery of it. Hey Adam. What? Did you find yourself a drunk Shimoda? Incredible.

Drunk Shimoda! Yeah, I think it's going to be Dr. On Talk for prioritizing his Targ's company to serious medical work getting done. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. I don't know, man. I think the lab isn't a place for animals. And I think if you're a serious medical doctor, you should know that, right? They do kind of roast flocks for...

being a guy that made a lot of similar choices. Yeah. Yeah. What about you? I'm going to give it to Rivers. I think that it is very funny that Seth McFarland used his write-your-own ticket-grade Hollywood success to get onto a show where he gets his balls kicked all the time. Rivers does not seem to be good at his job or capable or somebody that can be relied on to apply like hard-earned stuff from having been on the entrepreneur through the Zindy arc.

Like everybody that came back from that adventure is born again hard, right? Rivers was there. He was in the fucking expanse and he's no less green than he was when first we encountered him. I think that's a great choice. And for another reason, I mean, in that writes his own ticket quality, Rivers is never center frame he's never shot directly he's always off to the side

he's not saying anything important Seth McFarland would have every right to ask for something juicy and that's what he wanted to do specifically was just be an officer of any kind the more unimportant the better fills me with some respect for Seth McFarron

and like he could have made a big fucking stink about this, wanting to be a thing on this show, and he didn't. And I think that's commendable. You could have played a reptile Zindi who was supposed to be on the test sphere that came and cut up Florida, but missed call time. Tripp's having a hard time getting over to Paul. He thinks that's bad. What's wrong, Tripp, Taka? Faith of the fart. Why don't we head over to gach.biz slash game?

Yeah. Tell us a little bit about what's coming up on next week's episode Style-wise, while I tell you about Star Trek Enterprise Season 4 episode 16 Divergence. With Columbia's help, the Enterprise grapples with sabotage,

to their ship as they pursue the truth behind the kidnapping of flocks. You know, it occurs to me, Ben, that what we've done to our show is sabotage it quite a bit with the games that we play at the end of every episode. It is at the Game of Butholes, the Will of the Riker Quantum Leap, that we have that chance to sabotage the next episode. because once I roll this hundred-sided die, it could be anything. Sabotage away, my friend. You're required to learn as you play. Roll. Ooh, boy, we landed on square 48.

Shula! Did I win? Hardling. Ben, right next to the breadstick square. Oh, fuck. Breadstick power hour was so close to happening. Fuck. You want to talk about sabotage.

Sabotage our birdies with something like that. That. Incredible. Don't need that at all. It hasn't happened yet, and it's so close to happening almost constantly we land on the doorstep of that thing. Oh, fuck. Did you know that General Kavach was played by James Avery, Adam? I didn't. James Avery of Fresh Prince of Bel Air fame. He played Uncle Phil. Yeah.

Also played Shredder on Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Incredible. Wow. I love it. What a fucking legend. disappeared into that character. I didn't even notice. The thing about James Avery is a friend of mine who works at a studio lives in his old house. No kidding.

Yeah. Wow. Up in the hills. That's the trivia about the house. It's pretty fun. That rules. James Avery's house. It's great. Tremendous. Well, also tremendous is the incredible support we received from the Friends of DeSoto. on a monthly basis who go to maximum fun.org slash join and set up a membership, getting access to the bonus feed.

You know, they may be way ahead of the game on our coverage of Baywatch if that winds up being what happens. Could you imagine if that's what happens? I welcome it, honestly. Whatever happens happens. I've got to say thanks to Wendy Pretty, our producer and editor, out whom the show would not show up in everybody's feed. every Monday. We got to thank Rob Adler, the executive editor of the Greatest Newsletter, which you can sign up for at greatesttrek.com. I'm going to thank Bill Tilly, the card daddy, who's making hilarious trading cards about this show and Greatest Trek

episodes every week on the At Greatest Trek social media accounts, which he co-runs with Rob Adler. And we got to thank Adam Ruggusia, who made the original parody of Diane Warren's Enterprise theme. And Dark Materia, who of course made the card song which you're hearing under our voices right now. But that will be back at you

next week with another great episode of Star Trek Enterprise and episode of the Greatest Generation Enterprise where we're taking two best ships in Starfleet and putting them ass to ass. Only 10 more episodes of a Star Trek podcast, Ben. It's amazing. That might be it.

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