The Greatest Generation - Mount Knuckmore (S3E25)

Episode Date: October 3, 2016

When the Enterprise beams aboard the mysterious survivor of a space ship crash, it's up to Dr. Crusher to nurse him back to health. But when the patient starts placing his "gifted hands" upon some of the crew, Captain Picard must decide if his crimes can be so easily wiped away. What does Geordi's VISOR smell like? Where can we get a "Body Glove Wetsuit O'Brien" action figure? Is this Worf's idea of dating? It's the episode where the hosts prefer the blue Powerade.

Priority 1 message from Starfleet coming in on Secured Channel. Hey friends of Disodo. Before today's episode, we just wanted to take a moment to talk about the historic labor actions being taken by writers and actors in the American Film and Television industry. If you're a fan of the work done by the people who make Star Trek, we hope you'll join us in standing in solidarity with the folks who actually bring these adventures to life. Over the past several years, the AMPTP, the organization that represents the American Film and Television Production Studios, have reduced the profit from movies and TV going to workers. And in so doing,

they've attempted to weaken the labor unions that represent those workers. They wouldn't even engage the unions on many issues in their negotiations. And so a strike was the only course of action to take. Adam, Wendy and I have been having a lot of internal discussions about how best to stand with the unions and we are continuing those conversations in a dynamic situation. We're doing our best to understand where the picket lines are in these digital spaces,

and we would never intentionally cross one. With the information we have, we feel like we can do more good talking about and supporting the strike and continuing our show as planned. We'll keep you informed about what all this means for greatest trek specifically. Today we're making a contribution to the Entertainment Community Fund. This fund exists to help all the people whose livelihoods have been put on hold because the AMPTP refuses to negotiate

in good faith with the unions. It provides financial support for writers, actors, and all the thousands of laborers who make the shows that we talk about here and without whom we wouldn't have Star Trek to cast pot about. Those folks are all out of work because billionaires, company shareholders, and the executives of these companies don't want to compromise on the length of their yachts. We hope you'll join us in supporting entertainment workers in a challenging time, especially after they've already endured several years of challenges brought on by the pandemic

and season two of Star Trek Picard. We've set up a page where you can also contribute. It's at friendsofdecotoforlabor.com. That's friendsofdecotoforlabor.com. That's friendsofdisotoforlabor.com. Link in the episode description. Okay, now let's get on with the show. Welcome to the greatest generation. Star Trek Podcast by two guys who are a little bit embarrassed to have a Star Trek Podcast. I'm Adam Pranica. I'm Benjamin R. Harrison.

Hey Adam, I have a bit of a scandal to bring to your attention. Oh really? Now you are recording not from your normal spot today. It's true. It's true. Unfortunately, you're not going to be able to do much about this. But I was sitting up here editing an earlier episode in our podcast series and I was noticing that I had star trek cards all over my desk. And so I decided to organize them numerically.

And in so doing, I noticed that I only have odd numbered cards. What? Yeah. I mean, I have like, dozens of cards open now. Not a single one is an even number. That is really weird. Isn't that wild?

I mean, it must be like, the boxes, either an even box or an odd box, but kind of a crazy conspiracy, right? I thought for sure that we've had duplicate cards before though. Yeah, so I'm wondering, do you also have an odd box? And what are the evens? Wow, I don't know. That's pretty scandalous, dude.

Yeah. So... That's pretty scandalous, dude. Yeah. So, uh... I think what it means is I'm gonna have to buy us two more boxes and pray to God that there are evens. Otherwise, we're never gonna finish our set. I know. I was actually pretty impressed at how like evenly distributed across. I have literally the card for the first episode and the card

for the last episode, and a pretty like even distribution across the interseeding episodes, but no evens. So I have like encountered 4.1 and then no encounter at 4., and then I have the naked now, and that's card number three. Wow. This has gotta be only interesting to us. But that's pretty bizarre. It's weird, right? Yeah, I bought our boxes at the same time. So whatever, whatever,

Star Trek card purveyor that I bought from, fucked us, Ben. They really fucked us. Yeah. Well, should we get into this episode? Speaking of, uh, fucking, let's turn the page to season three episode 25, Transfigurations. Ben this is I think this is an all-time great opening scene. Yeah this is a scene that opens with Worf and Jordy in 10-4 are word. Worf's got a pink drink, Jordy's got a blue drink. Jordy's drinking hypnotic. Yeah, and they're gonna, they're gonna mac on some chicks, or at least Jordy is gonna try to, but...

Worf has some words of advice for Jordy that don't necessarily translate into human courtship rituals. Words come later. It is the scent that first speaks of love. We see like the, maybe like the defining, uncomfortable Jordy talking to a woman seen. Yeah, he sees his old pal Christy across the room. Don't stare. Why not?

Because she'll see. Yeah. She's looking pretty fine. She's just one of her friends. And she's in her civies too. Yeah. So she got a little dolled up to come to 10 forward tonight. Jordi and Worf are in their uniforms.

Worf is like, what's the big deal? Like you wanted to know that you know that she's there. But what's the problem? Jordy's like you just don't understand. And in Worf's way, Worf understands completely. Like none of his advice is weird or wrong or oddly clinging on. It's just like make your intentions known. I had to wonder because Jordy has taken great exception to Worf's idea of sex in the past. Is this your idea of sex? Is Worf intentionally kind of fucking with Jordi here? Does he like

laid and wait until the time was right and Jordi asked his advice on how to talk to a girl, and now he's like the time is coming here springing his trap. It's hard to tell because it seems like warfs a little bit sincere with his advice. He's like one piece of advice is hilarious. He's like you must let her see the fire in your eyes. Which saying that to someone like Jordy is hilarious. It's like asking Card to show Vash's manageable flake-free hair, it just can't be done. Yeah, asking Data to show a woman his flush boyish skin. Yeah, I mean what he's trying to I think, is play into Jordy's strengths, or at least away from his weaknesses,

like, which are saying anything at all, is a weakness for Jordy, so Warf is like, play up the other senses, like, your eyes, and your smell. Good advice, Warf. I feel like Jordy probably smells pretty good. Sure. I bet his advisor smells like like a retainer though.

Yeah, they've never shown the, they'll like, large cup of water that he puts it in his bedside. He's got a brush at every night. Yeah. But, about 90% of our viewership knows exactly what that smell is. Yeah. Rose. But uh, about 90% of our viewership knows exactly what that smell is. Yeah. That's the opposite of a two percenter Adam. Yeah. It's true.

Um, so, so Jordi does not build up the nerve to go up and, and kick it to this girl. But she does. And so she comes to like get a refill at the bar and manages to line it up so that she comes in right alongside Jordy, which is an invitation to say hi at the very least and Jordy totally clams up. And Wurf in the scene is like holy mackerel. So much fun.

He is so ashamed. Could not be more uncomfortable. He's showing more shame in this scene than he was when his family name is forever tarnished on the Klingon home world. Like he doesn't have that much shame. Yeah. So, Christy, clearly a little bit disappointed that she's not going to be going back to Jordi's place tonight. Heads back to finish her hang out with her friend and Jordi gets called up by Commander Reiker and he's being ordered to go on an await mission and he's like, listen Commander, I've been sitting here drinking with Warfall

Knight. I'm half in the bag. I'm not going on an away mission right now. He's sort of pulling a polasky. Like he's taking over the alcohol enthusiast role on the show. But they beam down to this planet and it is a, there's like a wreck and it's a, it's, I guess, an escape pod and there's a guy that's kind of like pinned under some of the wreckage and it's in pretty rough shape and the doctor is like, listen, the only way we're going to stabilize him enough to beam him out of here is if somebody lends me their mind power, I guess he's's gonna do kind of like a digital autonomic mind meld with this guy

where somebody's like brain waves and breathing are gonna regulate the, her patient's brain waves and breathing. And so she puts like a chip on this guy, like directly on this guy's face wound, and then she puts another chip on Jordy's dome, and like a little puff of magic comes out of the man. And goes into Jordy, and he's like momentarily overwhelmed.

And goes into Jordy and he's like momentarily overwhelmed. Yeah, because he's not in pain, right? He flinches a little bit and he's like, no, Doc, I'm cool. It's the only thing that they recover from this ship other than the guy is like one of the large-sized bottles of blue powerade. And there's a long, very weird scene where Captain Picard is holding this bottle of power aid out in front of him. Like his arm extended holding it like he's waiting for somebody to take it from him. Yeah, it's on the bridge too.

Yeah, the whole bridge crew is talking about this thing. They're like, oh, is it like a computer component or a memory device? Something, it's clearly like part of the navigation system or something like that, based on where it was relative to other broken components that we found. It's hilarious because it's in the one place and in the one person's hands that it can affect the least.

It should be in a lab somewhere, but instead it's in Picard's hand. Yeah, and I think that I don't know. Maybe I'm giving him too much credit, but I detected that Patrick Stewart made a choice to play this for the Captain. He's very annoyed that nobody is coming and taking this weird object away. Yeah, the way he holds it out in front of him, it's like he's holding a check waiting for a server to grab it. Yeah, he's like, listen, I told you when we sat down that we're going to a show tonight, I need you to, I need you to make this happen a little bit more quickly.

make this happen a little bit more quickly. So yeah, that's like establishing the B storyline. The A storyline is the doctor resuscitating this wounded alien back to health. Yeah, and he's looking pretty rough. His face is totally covered in meatloaf. His arm looks basically severed. He's really fucked up. Yeah. And it sounds like by all accounts, his sync up with Jordy was instrumental in saving his life. So he's in a bio bed.

Yeah, they had like a real intense bio bed for this, didn't they? Yeah. And they had like extra barbassol, like running directly into it. Yeah, they have a Barbosol powerade mix Like a good 50 50 mix going into them. Yeah Hey, that's that's uh, that's the choice of champions, right? Yeah, you get some distilled water and some anti-freeze in there Yeah anti-freeze in there. Yeah, and so this kind of like takes place over the course of a number of scenes and like there's varying levels of weird, spacey bandages on his face and whatnot.

But eventually it's revealed that John Doe is looks real nice with his shirt off. There's a shot where it comes back and he's like basically back to looking pretty normal and he's all like oiled up and shirtless but he's still unconscious when he grabs the doctor and she's pretty much like all right I got a fuck this dude. Like, she is in. It, her attraction to him is so instantaneous. Like it, it happened on the planet surface. Like she was down. He was, he was a bag of meat down there. And she was like, oh, I gotta find a way to save this guy. I gotta show him all my wigs.

Yeah, maybe, maybe. She's like, I gotta find myself a man who can do both. And one is like the normal guy and the other, it looks like he's been dragged behind a motorcycle for 10 miles. That's what she's into. I feel like the doctor winds up bedding a kind of disconcerting number of her patients.

Did feel like that to you? Maybe I'm making this one episode more of her character than there actually is, but I feel like this isn't the only time she's kind of wanted to bang with... She's definitely Florence Nightingale, right? I guess so. I don't know. The doctor gets into these like bodice-rippery kind of storylines every so often. Yeah, I don't know. The doctor gets into these like bodice rippery kind of storylines every so often. Yeah, I don't know. As she's doing her scan on him, she's like, well the whole reason this guy pulled through

his terrible accident is because every cell in his body is mutating at the same time. Yeah, and it's fixing itself up. It's not just fixing itself up though. It's like the parts of him that weren't fucked up are Changing also and that's the angle too. She's she's like it's not just a matter of his body healing It's a matter of his entire body changing. Yeah One of the other thing we should talk about is this episode seems to take place over the course of maybe like two months Which is very strange for a TNG episode. I don't think that they are usually

Set on that kind of time scale because like everybody wears the same clothes all the time and So like it might be like later the same day or it might be two weeks from now. But at one point, Riker hops on the elevator with Jordy. And Kristy walks out saying, this is where I get off. And then she leaves. And there's no more perfect line of dialogue than a girl saying that to Jordy if she's leaving. Yeah.

Well, it's definitely implied that Riker and Christie have gotten down in the past. But Riker is really delighted by this new confidence that Jordy has. Jordy is like, yeah, I'm the man now. There's all this fun and games around that. When he first goes and actually talks to her in 10-forward, data is like completely baffled by this and warfling's over and is like, I've been tutoring him. He learns very quickly.

You know, he's my protégé. Jordy's behavior is so strange to data that you could see it just sort of breaking him. Yeah, yeah. Data's going to have to go reset his positronic net after this. The other thing about this guy, this John Doe guy, is he has no memory. Right. And that's a big problem because they found his body on this planet. They sort of want to return him to owner.

Right. And they don't know where to take him. Right. So it's kind of a to return him to owner. Right. And they don't know where to take him. Right. So it's kind of a mystery on that front too. Yeah, and this is like a real classic Jason Born type of memory loss trope where he's lost all of his memory and then like just when it is convenient for the plot,

like little scraps come back. And this happens more later in the episode, but when he perceives danger, it's instinct, but then he's like, oh yeah, that's a bad guy. His Jason Bourne power is opposite Jason Bourne because his compulsion is to heal instead of break someone's arm into a compound factor. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And like one of the fun scenes where you realize this is is there in there in sick bay and chief O'Brien walks in with a separated shoulder. Yeah.

Cause I guess he really likes going kayaking in 1986, as is a polydic program. Yeah. Yeah. Cause Beverly is like separated shoulder again. Yeah. No, she faux Brian's like, yep. Nobody more incongruent in six bay than, than like body glove wetsuit,

oh Brian. Yeah, you could just see like the gaff tape, imperfectly taped over the body glove logo. Yeah, yeah, it's great. And yeah, and John Doe lays hands upon him and totally Jesus is the shoulder pain away. Yeah, and that's pretty wild. Everybody knows what to make of that.

And they don't really look into it at all. They don't like, you know, give a rat a shoulder injury and say like, can you reproduce that? You know? They don't use the scientific method as what you say. Yeah. They just sort of watch and, uh,

like they turn into medieval peasants when he starts going around healing people with his hands. They realize that John Doe's special power is fixing broken things. And that serves to explain what he did to Jordy's mind. Which up until now has seemed irreparably broken. Yeah. So the the doctor continues to be quite taken with this man and in fact she has dinner with Wesley the boy at one point and this is kind of his only scene of any length in this episode I feel like.

Yeah. And he basically spends it just kind of digging into her level of interest in getting down with John Doe. Like, it's a really, I don't know. In a very classy way, Wes is like, you kind of want to fuck him, don't you? Yeah. Yeah. Classy way West is like you kind of want to fuck him don't you? Yeah Yeah, and in a very demure kind of way she's like well, I don't know I just I just think he's cool That's all yeah, and she rocks a lot of knuck now that he's got this white uniform on it is hall of fame now

Like I feel like we've gotten quite a few guest stars rocking the knuck on this show and this guy This guy is on the Mount Rushmore of Knuck. Round Mount Knuckmore. The thing about Mount Knuckmore is that it's not faces on the mountain. Yeah, it's just a Kyle Reiker's groin. Yeah, and the other thing about this, it's Kyle Reiker. It's Q. It's John Doe. Who's the fourth? Do we have a fourth? Somebody from the Edo. Yeah, that's right. It is that guy from the Edo. Oh man. That's a T-shirt. That is totally T-shirt. One thing I wondered about this costume is he has been around Oh man.

One thing I wondered about this costume is he has been around on this ship for a couple weeks now recovering. He was in like a blue onesie before, but then he's like, well enough to start walking around the ship. So you have to assume that he goes over to like the replicator and goes like let me get some civilian clothing Computer shows him some options and he's like Hmm head to toe white space turtle neck, please And I want it to be like pretty knuck forward

In the future the body glove brand is taking very literally. Yeah. Oh, man. Yeah, there's no belt line. It is just a wall of white. Yeah. It's just smooth as an envelope. I wrote down the word knuckapalooza in my notes, but I like rep mountain knuck more so much more.

Yeah, yeah, I do too. I just wrote down all caps, H-O-F-N-U-K, as in holophame knuck. H-O-F-N-U-K. Look. Uh, I am a cute, disaball. There are four lights. They're, uh, cut back to the Powerade bottle storyline every so often. And one of the things that's happened with Jordy's mind working so good, all of a sudden, is that he's able to work out what this thing is. And he figures out that it's like it's a star map. The way he puts it though is like He's like, you know, I was thinking about this part last night. Yeah, I was lying on my super uncomfortable pillow

It was established earlier in the episode that he's been spending every night with Christie So I was thinking that this was his thinking about baseball He was thinking about this power aid bottle. Oh, but now that he has the ring of Jesus fire, does he need to think about baseball, or is he just that good? Did John Doe fix him in a super sexual manner? I mean, you have to assume, right? What's his confidence, his only improvement?

I guess maybe that would be true of Riker, also laid hands on it, but only John did. So yeah, they figured out this is a star map and they run a trajectory on where the pod came from that they found. And it just happens to be on the path that they're already traveling. That's convenient. It's like screenwriting 101 that is never how something is supposed to work in a movie

or television show. That is a classic moment where Star Trek has an opportunity to raise the stakes and they go in the opposite direction. Like, it's a head faint toward raising the stakes at all. There are infinite possibilities of where this guy came from and the ship came from. And it just so happens that they hit the lottery that they can just drop this guy off on their way

to their final destination. Right, so it's like, it completely lets the air out of that being a storyline that we have any investment in. Yeah. Yeah. But anyways, they... And it's so unnecessary, too. Like, what would be the harm in course correcting?

Right. If they say, like, boy, like the admirals are going to really breathe down my neck if we don't keep doing the science mission we're on or whatever the fuck they're doing. The hood's gonna beat us there. We don't step on it. Yeah, yeah, Captain DeSoda is never gonna step gloting around the Admiral's Club, it's Starfleet Command. So they're like, great, we can drop this guy off on our way to our errand.

And we aren't even gonna be late for it. Yeah, this will, like usually we're doing Uber X, but this is kind of like Uber pool. And they're like, somebody tell John Doe that we're going to drop him off. He's going to be super stoked about it. And John Doe is not stoked. John Doe's memories have been coming back at a rate that's hastened to the point where he is very apprehensive about returning to his home planet. He has a business head that he has indeed fled his planet

and was intending to escape when his ship crashed. And so they, they're like, well, you know, like we're still super far from there, three more weeks before we're even close. So let's keep thinking on it, but that's the plan at the moment. So they're getting closer and closer to this planet and they discover on long range sensors that there's a ship coming in at like super high warp, like really like maxing out its engine. And the ship

isn't responding to hails or anything. And so they're like getting a little uneasy about this situation, but they keep going. And then finally, the ship comes out of warp and it's like right on top of them. And they manage to, I guess the ship scans them and then they're willing to talk. I guess, yeah, because they didn't want to talk to them

unless they knew that John Doe was a board. Because they're like isolationists, right? Yeah. Yeah. So these are a type of alien that call themselves zelconians. And the head guy has real frances from Peewee's Big Adventure vibes. Yeah. It's chewing a stick of gum that makes black goo come out of his mouth.

Yeah, you're sort of a permanently furrowed brow. Yeah. Takes a bath and a huge tub with really highly realistic, navel boat toys in it. So they're on their way to meet the zalconians, and they break the news to John Doe, and John Doe is like, let me off this ship. If you don't let me off, I'm just gonna leave. And he books it out of six bay, and in a very slow trot, sort of jogs his way to a shuttle bay, where he begins trying to jake a shuttle

pot. He's like, he's like hitting buttons, hitting switches, trying to get this bunk bed to leave and, and Wurf and a crew of dust busters come in to try to stop him. So he's sort of on this upper level. Yeah, he's up above the big control tower level. And Beverly's down below and she's trying to talk him down and Worf kind of peels off, takes a little side turbo lift up to the top. Yeah. And and and tries to talk him out of it. He's like, look man, I don't want to hurt you, but you got a back away from those controls like like back away now before

I shoot you. and John does like John Doe kind of talks like Jason Bourne in the scene He's like you need to back away from me. I don't know what I'm capable of right trust me on this like like get the fuck out of here Yeah, and what ends up happening is he wings him over the railing and Well, he doesn't wing him over the railing. He gets like up over the railing. And well, he doesn't wing him over the railing. He gets like a, he's like, part of his like body changing is that occasionally he gets like a glowing pulse out of his chest.

Do not come any closer. I cannot control what is happening to me. Oh. Oh. And this one is like sufficient to blast Wharf back and Wharf goes ass over T-Kettle onto the lower deck of the hangar bay and lands right on his neck. This scene I thought was a great lesson in close up editing because in season one, they would have cut wide to the stuntman.

And then they would have cut back close again on Michael Dorn on the ground. And they did three rapid cuts, which I thought was great. They did low angle shooting up. So you definitely know it's Michael Dorn. Yeah. They did the mid angle as Warf falls it's Michael Dorn. Yeah. The mid-angle as War Fals passed, also Michael Dorn. And then the low-angle parallel to the floor when War Fits his neck, it was fucking great.

Yeah, it was a show that has come a long way in. Oh, man, so far. Like, there's no mattress to be seen. There's no frumpy stunt man. Like, It was great. It was so great that you don't notice it. I mean, also, they only have the one stunt man that always plays data. That wouldn't have looked right. It would have been pretty bad to try and make that guy look like Worf. Yeah. But yeah, it's a well executed stunt. Yeah, and so Worf is down, and then we find out a second later that his neck is broken, and he's fucking dead.

Yeah. So, John Doe comes down. Maybe he uses the fireman's pole to get down there, but he's down there in an instant. And after laying his hands on him, Worf wakes up. Yeah. I think there's another episode where Worf suffers a traumatic brain injury or like a back, breaks his back or something. Do you think Beverly would have yelled to the sky in Warp's honor to warn the dead that a warrior were coming? Yeah. Do you think Warp saw Stovacore? Oh man, he was like floating toward it and he was like, these assholes don't even know it's about to hit him because there was no clingsons

around to yell. It's definitely not a white light, right? No. It's probably like red strobe lights. I don't think it's in TNG, but maybe in Deep Space 9, I feel like they actually depict Stovocore as like a boat. That's like a pirate boat. Oh, that's great. I could be wrong. It seems maybe that's just something I had like in a fever-druck cruise ship. Yeah. So John Doe's basically more Jesus than Ginger Jesus ever was. Yeah, Ginger Jesus has left the building. John Doe is here to stay. And this should

fucking melt everyone's minds. Like they've seen him lay hands on Chifobrion and War. Right. And then somebody's rotator cuff injury is one thing, bringing somebody back from from the dead. I feel like it's worthy of at least a, whoa. But, but no one does anything. Yeah. They really play it cool. What's great is that they cut to the ready room. And John Doe and Beverly and Picard are in their having a little meeting.

And Picard's like, dude, you would be in big trouble if Warf was actually dead. The only reason that you're not in cuffs right now is because you brought him back to life. Like, yeah. What a weird concept. Like, you did kill him. He killed a bridge officer.

And then if that, like, if I go to a, if I go steal somebody's car and give that get give the car back a week later that doesn't unsteal the car right right. It's so weird. The card's like yeah we don't really know what you are and you clearly don't have your memory back. Yeah. It's like we have no lull to fit your crime. John Doe again, it's like, I'm not going over to that ship, by the way. The zalconians have said, this guy's dangerous,

you're gonna beam him back over to us and we're gonna execute him, because that's what he deserves. Picard talking to, what's the guy's name? Sonad, Captain Sonad. Of that other ship, yeah. Yeah. Is trying to kind of manage this situation because the zelconians are clearly like an isolationist race.

They don't want anything to do with anybody else. He's like, you know, like we just travel around trying to like get to know people and have cool hangs. And they're like, we don't want cool hangs. We don't want anything. And we just want that guy so that we can kill him. And Picard is like, all right, well, you're gonna have to like kind of convince me that there's a really good reason for me to give him back to you, because we're not really down with the whole like, corporal punishment thing. Not only Arena, not down with that punishment, but like all indications are that this guy's

peaceful, he just wants to put his hands on people. Yeah. And so it looks like it's about to come to a head when, uh, Sunad's like, you're going to give him back to us or, and then he sort of like gives an indication to his tactical officer and he basically forced jokes the entire enterprise crew. Yeah, and were you, were you under the impression that this was a, a weapon that they have or do they have like mind powers also just not nearly as advanced as, as John does. I thought it was a weapon because of his gesture to someone else on his bridge. Yeah. I thought if it was a mind power, he would have just stayed focused on the FaceTime. Yeah.

It was weird though. Like, they never address what that was, or like, you know, like, I feel like when the Federation meets a species that has like something on that's more powerful than them like that, they're like, oh fuck, we gotta develop some kind of defense against this, typically. And we never hear about these people again. Yeah, another bottle, yeah. So, so, so everyone's down and choking. And so we cut to six bay and John Doe puts his hands on Beverly, wakes her up, and then they go out

into the corridor, wake up another random crewman, and then John Doe puts his hands on the ship, and blows his gold dust all over the entire ship and that wakes everyone up. Here's what's weird been. So we cut back to the bridge, as the bridge crew wakes up, and data gets everyone up. Here's what's weird been. So we cut back to the bridge, as the bridge crew wakes up, and data gets up too.

Yeah. Data was down. What was going on with data? I don't know, that was a weird scene. Yeah, data's vulnerabilities are very much at the mercy of the plot a lot of the time. Yeah, I feel like he's the one guy that could probably survive that. What do you think if data if everybody starts getting choked on the bridge and data is still there? Like he's the second officer of the ship.

Does he go start like laying out spreads of photon torpedoes and stuff? I wish we got that. Man, that would have been cool, right? That would have been great. He's the only he's the only crew in that ship needs. Yeah, really. Well, anyways. So John Doe makes his way to the bridge and card sort of lawyer, and kind of like, look, your weird force choke power isn't gonna work on us because we've got an all powerful person over here that we're kind of not feeling like

beaming over to your ship now for your corporal punishment. So what are you gonna do about that? At this point, John Doe begins feeling the forces of transformation even more acutely, right? Yeah. He starts spasming out a little bit. Well, and he brings Sonat over.

Like he pulls him through the view screen. Like it's a proscenium, you know? Like he's the the the well girl from the ring movie? Yeah. prasinium, you know? Like he's the the the well girl from the ring movie? Yeah, and I never saw the movie only the parody, the million parodies of it that we were forced to watch for like two and a half years, but I don't know.

But yeah, like like he like raises a hand and should not is suddenly standing nose to nose with Picard and he's fucking, he's freaking out, you know, because he wasn't expecting to, to not be on his ship and he doesn't, he doesn't wanna talk to aliens. Yeah, I really feel a great amount of sympathy for him in that moment.

Yeah, I mean, he is a murderous meany, and he is rocking a little bit of a knuck of his own. Yeah. But yeah, he's like there to take John Doe home and he's too late. So what we get is that this species, the zalconians have been aware of people that have been on the path to make this transformation for a long time.

And they've been saying it's a disease and it's fatal and killing these people because they knew that it was going to make them more powerful than the leadership of their society and they feared that power. And so John Doe escaped, and he's the first one of them to ever have gotten as far as he's gotten. And just then he turns into a being of pure light and or a guy in a green screen suit that they put a little glow effect on and post. He totally, like Don's Charlie's Green man costume from always sunny. Yeah, it's

incredibly bad. It was one of the worst effects ever. It's like in post they had a chance to ramp the glow up all the way to 100% and they put like a 20% glow on it. Yeah, that's weird. You can see his mouth move inside the body suit. You can see the wrinkles on the back of the neck. Yeah, he looks like a package of hot dogs. He really does. Yeah. Like this was an okay episode up until this moment.

Yeah, it doesn't live up to the rest of the episode for sure. Yeah. But yeah, like they've demonstrated that he's now like doubt powerful and therefore uh Mr. Doe I'm now aware of your presence in the universe if you'd like to come out and hang with me and cue we. We're planning a boys night. We're thinking we'll go to the Sonic Drive-In and then perhaps catch a film at a Drive-In movie theater. We're just really into driving right now. Being all powerful it seems like comically ironic. Listen, if we do the Drive- driving thing you're gonna have to hide in the trunk because we don't want a pay-pull price

I don't want to pay for fairs. They always charge for my real doll in the back seat Even though I've told them over and over. She's not really alive. Oh Man, yeah, the omnivotent club has gained a member here. Yeah. So they send Sonad back to his ship. They say they're goodbyes to being of pure light. And he turns into like a kind of a weird fireball and the last shot is the fireball like popping up out of the lid of the ship and zipping

off into space. Roll credits. A greatest-gen live show is something you don't want to miss. Why? Well, it's a great opportunity to see me and Ben in person, but that's not all. FODs from all over gather at these shows to cosplay, to do pre and post show hangs, to make friends, and share their embarrassment. Hey, let's make a pretty great name for a tour. Let's do it!

The Share Your Embarrassment Tour is coming in August 2023, and we've got a bunch of dates in a lot of great places. Go to greatestgentour.com to get more info. That's greatestgentour.com for dates and ticketing information for the Share Your Embarrassment Tour. I'm Jordan Morris, and I'm Jesse Thorne. On Jordan Jesse Go, we make pure delight full nonsense We were open awesome guests and bring them down to our level. We get stupid with Judy Greer

My friend Molly and I call it having the spaceweards Pat Noswald. Could I get a Balrog burger and some air-gorn fries? Thank you and come here on non-Giani I've come back with cat toothbrushes, which is impossible to use. Come get stupider with us at MaximumFun.org. Look, your podcast apps are already open. Just pull it out. Give Jordan Jesse Goatry. Being smart is hard.

Be dumb instead. Well, rats, hey, they don't know I'm about to count you in line. These clouds are really freaking me out. I hate having to stand in line. And boy, what do I? These giraffes do not smell good. No, they do not, and they've such short neck. But I'm hearing we need to get on this.

So you gotta get on the arc. It is about terrain, about a spout to destroy humanity. Hey, oh, sorry, sorry, sorry. Are you Noah? Yeah, I know we look like humans. We're actually, we're podcasters. We are podcasters, so it's different. Have you heard of Ono Ross and Kerry?

We investigate spirituality, claims of the paranormal, stuff like that. And you have a boat and say the world's gonna end, so seem like something for us to check out. We would love to be on the boats. We came two by two. What do you think? Ono Ross and Carrie, available on MaximumFun and Outdoor. He kind of gives Beverly one of those the thing that you only see in TV and movies where he like he raises her cheek and chin with the back of his hand in affection. Yeah. You can't do that in real life. It would have been fun if she'd been like, oh, it burns, it burns so much.

Yeah. It does sort of look like a hot element on an electric stove, you know? Yeah. Well, he'd immediately be able to heal her if he burned her. It's unclear if after his departure, Jordy gets to keep his powers, right? But I guess if he heals Worf and he heals O'Brien, like if he left and that weren't the case, like Worf would be dead and O'Brien would have a

re dislocated shoulder. I guess I headcan in my way back into that making sense now. Well, something to enjoy. So Jordi gets to keep his confidence, right? His macking on chick's ability. God. Something we'll have to watch for in season four. I'm a little disappointed that this might be the end of creepeper Jordan. He was very fun to make fun of.

Yeah, well, all good things, Adam. Did you like this episode, Ben? I did. I think you're right that it's a bit dopey, the way they pulled the effects off at the end. But it's a bit... Yeah, they just fucking knee-capped the episode with that. It was so bad. Yeah.

I mean, but it is... ultimately kind of a bottle app and just... You know, I don't know. Do you think they knew that no one would ever remember it? Because of the episode that's coming up next? Maybe. Yeah. I don't know. This watched to me like a brand new episode. I didn't remember it because of the episode that's coming up next. Maybe. Yeah. I don't know. This watched to me like a brand new episode. I didn't remember it at all.

I remembered parts of it. But yeah, I mean, it did feel kind of, uh, yeah, like a storyline that hasn't stuck with me. Like I wondered if some future date when I haven't watched the show in a while, if I come back to it, it will feel like that again. I almost feel like it will. It's very plaudy, but there's really like dumb, I don't know, the plot doesn't, isn't that meaningful ultimately. When they discover that the power aid can is just a map that's leading them to where they've already been headed is like, are you fucking kidding me? Why did you write that whole part? Did somebody come up with a way to make that prop and you were like, all right, let's write

something around this. And like, the post script is that no one grew as a character except for Jordy and the only reason that he did is because he was bequeathed special powers. Yeah. No one's better except for him. It's a day of sex machina. And he got better cheaply. It's a day of sex machina. It's a duisex machina.

Did you like it or? It was I liked it up until the last five minutes. I'll say that. Fair enough. Adam, I think I hear something coming in over subspace. Was that what you hear? Yeah, well no. I am just throwing to our jumbo tron segment. You wanna listen? I'm recording this in a hotel room, man. I thought that was just the next room over. Ha ha ha ha. Let's check in on it.

Pryority one message from Starfleet coming in on Secured Channel. Pryority one message from Starfleet coming in on Secured Channel. Need a supplement on it. Pryority one message from Starfleet coming in on Secured Channel. Need a supplement on it. Pryority one message from Starfleet coming in on Secured Channel. Need a supplement on it. Need a supplement on it. Need a supplement on it. Need aolo. Stoppolo. Yes, extra. How do you interest alone? Could be enough to buy this ship.

Our first priority one message is a personal message for Megan from Carrey. And it goes like this, Benjamin and Adam. Can you sing this given the recent Warner Chapel copyright case, these lyrics, and Melody are in the public domain. It also seems to ignore our very rampant and generous interpretation of the fair use doctrine. Oh yeah. I actually sat through a seminar on fair use. And I think we're like mostly okay, but we do occasionally probably tiptoe over the line.

Okay, so we have to sing the birthday song, but maybe you should do it as Kevin Uxbridge and I should do it as Pocosby, just to make it fun. That's great. Do you have one of those harmonizer discs to do that? Me, me, me, me, me. Okay, I think I'm ready. discs to do that. MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM Happy Birthday to you. Happy Birthday dear Brody! Happy Birthday to you. I hope you live forever. Hmm.

Happy Birthday Megan. Happy Birthday Megan. That's from Carrie. There's no way that that infringes on anyone's copyright. Or anyone's sense of good taste. Yeah, that was just a good clean fun. Our next jumbo-tron message is from Gonzo and Ben and it is to Gordon. Um, messages this, it says,

Thank you and your son James for being the captain Picard and Wesley Crusher. The boy to our Jordy and Tata, these last years. May your memes be dank, may your Shemotas be drunk, and may your Nasell's ever propel you at Maximum Warp. May your tea always be Earl and Grey, and also Hot. O'Captain, our Captain, make it so, and engage. Ha-ha-ha! What a nice toast at the end.

Yeah, I, uh... I'm inclined to steal that. sale and engage. What a nice toast at the end. Yeah, I, uh, I'm inclined to steal that. Yeah, I, that, there was something inscrutable about that. I don't quite know what the relationship is between all these people, but it, it was very sweet and heartfelt. Yeah. Yeah, very nice. Well, it was much easier to do that than saying as the Cosby too.

Yeah, let's never do that again. I think if we're in for a penny, we're in for a dollar. Yep. Yep. That's how the saying goes, right? Well, if you'd like to contribute a penny or a dollar to the Jembo Tron fund, you can only contribute in $100 increments if you're sending a personal message

or $200 increments if you're sending a commercial message, but all dollars are appreciated because it helps keep the lights on around here. So just go to maximumfund.org slash Jembo Tron to secure your message. And this is getting popular. Like I'm looking at our little chart and we're we are All set for the next couple episodes. I feel like our jumbo trons might also be dank This dank is them memes

Yeah, pretty cool fun. Hey Ben. What's that Adam? Did you find yourself a drunk Shimoda? Pretty cool. Fun. Hey, Ben. What's that, Adam? Did you find yourself a drunk Shimoda? Drunk Shimoda! I did find myself a drunk Shimoda, and my Shimoda in this episode is Worf. The Shimoda is the character that's doing something real silly and fun. And the biggest laugh line of this episode for me was when Warf like leans over to data and 10 forward and says that he's been mentoring Jordi on the ways of talking to women.

Essentially taking credit for Jordi getting that date. Oh man, it just, it may be laugh, because I was immediately forced to consider, does Wurf actually believe that, or is that just something he's telling data? Like, I love the idea that Wurf is like, wow, like, those couple of times I told Jordy some stuff to try when he talks to girls, really paid off.

Nice going, me. The entire concept that anyone would tell data, anything to impress me. I know. I think it's hilarious too. Oh man. How about yourself? Do you have a direct charimote?

Yeah, mine was also a wharf. And I think I just really enjoyed his nonverbal, or Michael Dorne's nonverbal acting in so many of these scenes, like how frustrated he was in 10 Forward, while everyone's talking shop and Wurf just wants to sit and drink. Yeah. I think my wife goes through this all the time.

Like when we go out with my wife and we're talking about film and video stuff, she's like, shop talk. And that normally like ends our day. Let's talking more drinking. I think that's a direct quote from your wife. Yeah, yeah, exactly. So I think we've all felt that way at time or two and warps embodiment of that was familiar and good and fun. Yeah. She's been. You sound tired, Ben.

What time is it over there? It is past my bedtime over here. Oh, man. Well, what do we have coming up on the next episode? Next episode is season 3 episode 26, The Best of Both Worlds, Part 1. The evil Borg capture Captain Picard in an attempt to conquer the human race. Do you remember this episode, Adam? That sounds pretty fun.

I remember the Borgs. Yeah, the Borgs, they're back. He's a Borg! Oh no! The Borgs are back and town! The Borgs are back and town! Yeah, well, Unvito abull well unbeatable because this season doesn't have any vetoes left so I don't think this is one we would veto right yeah this

is pretty important. I don't think so. So it's a foundational episode yeah which means the pressure is really on isn't it? And sure is, gotta get this one right. Can't afford to fuck this one up. We're gonna have to bring in Pekasbi. We're gonna have to bring in Uxbridge. We're gonna have to bring in this old enterprise. Every warmed over piece of shit joke that we do on every episode is coming back. Gotta play the hits, man.

Gotta play the hits. Yeah. And then when we talk about the actual plot points, it's like, we're gonna do one from our new album. And there he is, like, oh. Oh. Oh. This will be out in December, guys.

That new impression sucks. Yeah. Everyone goes out to get a beer during the new impression. Well, if our viewers are as excited about that episode as we are, maybe they'll be excited enough to support our show by going to MaximumFun.org slash Donate. Yeah. Or they can help this show's production. They can also even nice review where they download podcasts.

Those are also really helpful as well. And they can also reach out to us on Twitter using the hashtag raise chin. There is also a Facebook group that you can join and a Reddit sub that you can join. There's also the maximum fun subreddit. All great places to post about the show and debate all of the different jokes that we did not make. I feel like that's like one of the main comments is, why didn't you talk about blah blah blah. Yeah that's why I set up that rule, that mute rule that is why didn't you. So far it's working great, isn't it? Yeah, that's good to hear.

We should thank Dark Materia for our theme music and Adam Ragusia, the goose, or our priority one music. And with that, we will be back at you next week. Another great episode of Star Trek, the next generation, and an episode of the U. Get it, you'll look at God of the U. Get it, you'll look at God of the U. Get it, you'll look at God of the U. Make it sound. Both of my worlds are the best.

They're just the greatest worlds you have to believe me. We're gonna turn Captain Picard into a Borg and we're gonna make him pay for it. Lots of times you'll only find one world that's the best. I'm telling you I have the best of both worlds. Believe me. The Borgs are criminals, they're rapists and I'm sure some of them are good people. The Trump Tower Grill makes the best borg balls. Maximumfund.org Comedy and culture. Artists Don't

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