The Greatest Generation - Star Trek Podcast Measuring Contest (VOY S5E20)

Episode Date: April 10, 2023

When the Malons get behind on their starship maintenance, a break down creates a situation they can’t fix up on their own. But when Voyager rolls up to play tow truck, the ship they’re there to help becomes a total loss. Are the Malons horny for danger? What’s so bad about being caught meditating? Despite all her rage is BLT still just a rat in a cage? It’s the episode that really needs to SEO that shit!Support the production of The Greatest Generation.Friends of DeSoto for Democracy.Friends of DeSoto for Justice. Follow The Game of Buttholes: The Will of the Caretaker!Music by Adam Ragusea & Dark MateriaFollow The Greatest Generation on Twitter, and discuss the show using the hashtag #GreatestGen!The Greatest Generation is on Twitch.Facebook group | Subreddit | Discord | WikiSign up for our mailing list!Get a thing at podshop.biz!

Priority 1 message from Starfleet coming in on Secured Channel. Hey friends of Disodo. Before today's episode, we just wanted to take a moment to talk about the historic labor actions being taken by writers and actors in the American Film and Television industry. If you're a fan of the work done by the people who make Star Trek, we hope you'll join us in standing in solidarity with the folks who actually bring these adventures to life. Over the past several years, the AMPTP, the organization that represents the American Film and Television Production Studios, have reduced the profit from movies and TV going to workers. And in so doing,

they've attempted to weaken the labor unions that represent those workers. They wouldn't even engage the unions on many issues in their negotiations. And so a strike was the only course of action to take. Adam, Wendy and I have been having a lot of internal discussions about how best to stand with the unions and we are continuing those conversations in a dynamic situation. We're doing our best to understand where the picket lines are in these digital spaces,

and we would never intentionally cross one. With the information we have, we feel like we can do more good talking about and supporting the strike and continuing our show as planned. We'll keep you informed about what all this means for greatest trek specifically. Today we're making a contribution to the Entertainment Community Fund. This fund exists to help all the people whose livelihoods have been put on hold because the AMPTP refuses to negotiate

in good faith with the unions. It provides financial support for writers, actors, and all the thousands of laborers who make the shows that we talk about here and without whom we wouldn't have Star Trek to cast pot about. Those folks are all out of work because billionaires, company shareholders, and the executives of these companies don't want to compromise on the length of their yachts. We hope you'll join us in supporting entertainment workers in a challenging time, especially after they've already endured several years of challenges brought on by the pandemic

and season two of Star Trek Picard. We've set up a page where you can also contribute. It's at friendsofdecotoforlabor.com. That's friendsofdececoto for Labor.com. That's FriendsOfDecoto for Labor.com. Link in the episode description. Okay, now let's get on with the show. Here's to the finest crew in Starfleet. Engage! Watch your back shot. Hello. I'm Captain Cap. Printing what the U.S. says.

Boardhead jerk. Captain Cap. Printing what the U.S.S. Board of Interest Captain, Captain, Captain Brington, what is the U.S.S. Board of Interest Captain, Captain Welcome to the greatest generation It's a Star Trek podcast by a couple of guys We're just a little bit embarrassed about having a Star Trek podcast I'm Ben Harrison

I'm Adam Pryanaka And I was embarrassed about being the host of a Star Trek podcast last night Really? What happened last night? I went out to dinner and drinks with Mission Logs John Champion. Wow. Wow. And this is something that we've been doing with some regularity. He's a great hang. You're cultivating like an active friendship with John Champion.

I am. Yeah. I mean, for a long time, we've both had red phones on our studio desks that were a direct line. Right. In case... ...diffused tensions. You don't want the media to be telling you what's going on with the other side. I think if we ever got into a hot war with Mission Log, That's mutually assured Star Trek podcast destruction, right? Door extraction. Yeah, it really would be. So in an effort to make things less tense,

we've become friends. How far we've come. And who knows the shame of being a Star Trek podcaster better than another Star Trek podcaster? Yeah, yeah. It's like being a therapist and going to a therapist. Right. We know all the embarrassment shorthand. The guy that Dr. Melfi goes and sees after she has her session with Tony.

That's it exactly. And that's kind of your vibe with John Champion, would you say? Yeah. We're both the Dr. Melfi. It seems like you're sort of intentionally cutting me out of this friendship. Like last night it was like, it was like 5.45 and you were like, hey man, gonna be getting drinks with John Champion at seven. And I was like, I'm cooking dinner.

I was telling you basically as soon as I knew. So no, I wasn't cutting you out. I tried to include you in all the things. It seemed intentional to me. You wouldn't have wanted to be included in this hang for something that happened. What happened? We went to a popular German restaurant in Los Angeles. That list of words has never been uttered, that's the order before. And you know how it goes when you go to restaurants,

you know, dedicated to a pure expression to eating in a European country, this is communal table style. Sure. So we're at a big wooden table, eating schnitzel and sausage and drinking big glass signs of beers. And we're sharing this table with a couple of strangers. And me and John Champion are becoming fairly animated

about a conversation we're having about the new season of Star Trek Picard. And we have been eavesdropped on. Oh, wow. These people ask John Champion if he has a Star Trek podcast because contextually, that has been made clear. It just says him. And John's is also a Champion and character because he's like, yes I do, but this guy over

here has a bigger Star Trek podcast. He has got into a Star Trek podcast measuring contest. And that, that was not the compliment that he intended it to be in mixed company. Because me, as the person deemed having the bigger Star Trek podcast, kind of a conversation enter at that point, no follow up questions. Yeah, it's like telling someone you're an accountant. Well, the original question was if we worked on the shows. Oh Okay, like are you are you a part of the production or whatever and boy to watch someone's face

sink and disappointment when they think they're about to interact with sink and disappointment. When they think they're about to interact with, you know, a production person, someone with some credibility. This is an industry town. It's not unthinkable that you could find yourself sitting next to somebody that works on Picard at a popular German eatery. I was unwilling to steal industry valor in this case. I could only admit what I am and what I am is disappointing. What you are is someone who aspires to be blown out an airlock on a Star Trek show. I should be so lucky to be involved in these productions. Did they leave the table? Did they go to a different communal table or did they just

turn back to their meals? You know it's great and I've run into this a couple of times. I'm sure you have too. But like as soon as it's on the table, the kimono's open. Here's my Star Trek podcast. One of the great things you get from someone who's just being polite, but does not give a shit is the,

oh yeah, maybe I'll listen sometime, but they have no information about how to make that happen. As if I host the only one or John Champion host the only one, which I guess was true for a while. We've met podcasters that carry around like a business card with like a QR code or something, like some way that can turn that interaction into a new listener. I'm sorry I let you down, man. No, I could have made this better.

I could never countenance that. I think that when we started this show, when we were just a twinkle in our microphones I. Right. We hoped no one would listen because this is embarrassing, making a soundtrack podcast, an embarrassing thing to tell people you do with your time. Especially because our plan was to make a much, much better podcast.

Late afterwards, once we got through, whatever it was we needed to do to get good at podcasting. This was supposed to be like dust off, and then we would do something. Facts to swings. Credible with our time later, and it didn't turn out that way. But like, I think at this point, we both are in the strange position of like wanting more people to listen to our stereotype podcast. We have no other choice. But I couldn't say that to someone's

face, you know? If you were seated at a communal table at a popular German restaurant, you could not say the words I would like you to listen and subscribe to my podcast. The other thing that we really have to solve is that we don't really like show up if somebody searches Star Trek podcast. Still? And I'm guessing that that person, if they were curious, would have come up against a Google problem if they tried to find us after that little interaction. I thought making the greatest generation a Star Trek podcast by a couple of guys a little

bit embarrassed about a Star Trek podcast by doing that twice in the same show description might SEO that shit. No? I would have hoped so. We have friends at the Google. I'm gonna put friends and quotes, friends who wanted us to perform at Google HQ for free. Uh-huh. Not that long ago. Do you think they're stepping on our algorithm? Probably. Here's me at that show. Uh, I've got a question. This is, this is Google HQ, right? How do you make it so that my Star Trek podcast shows up when you search Star Trek podcast?

That's what we're trying to figure out. I just used deck.go as my search engine. I don't know what that is. No one knows what that is. Second result here on when I search Star Trek. Is that a search engine that minds Bitcoin? While you search. Probably. Second result here after just Star Trek, the pod directive is 70 best Star Trek podcast. You must follow in 2023. I bet you everything that we don't show up on a top 70 list. All I do is bet, bet, bet. Well, I'm going to give you over-ender top 10. Wow. Wow.

So by over, I'm saying 10 to 77 and under, I'm saying 1 to 9. I'm saying over, we're in the top 10 under, we are not in the top 10. OK. I am through context clues. I'm going to I'm going to take the over because that is a complimentary over under number two have used. We are outside of the top 10.

We're we're several places below StarCraft the next conversation at 17. But we're we're one above mission log, which is at 18. On that list, we're seated right next to mission log at the communal table. Yeah. The official Star Trek podcast should be number one. It should just be a two through 77 list. This 70 podcast list also appears to only have 62 podcasts on it, so. I don't think it's a valid list. It's not a valid list. It doesn't have greatest track on it at all.

It's fucking blows. If you are voting on a top start check podcast, stay in line. They must let you vote if you're already in line. Well, that was my social nightmare last night. Half of it was good. The hang was good. The communal table. Not as good.

Don't really care for that. So what I'm saying is you dodged one, Ben. By me inviting you too late for you possibly to attend. There's no FOMO there, right? Yeah. Should we get into today's episode? Or you had a, you said you had a, like a disclaimer before we talk about today's episode. Was that right? Oh, yeah. I just want to say this. A lot of rhymy names of mail-ons, a lot of mail-on names that sound alike. Yeah. And I just want to say, I'm looking to look into the camera right now when I say this.

I want the friend to just so do to know how sincere I am when I say I'm not a male on racist. I can tell them apart. The names are just difficult for me to grasp. I'm gonna do the best I can. When we talk about phasic, health and dream. You get pre-quad box this Adam. You're getting in trouble. I'm just going to say

going into this, you're getting in trouble for forgetting who's who among the mail on. Enormous episode today of Star Trek Voyager. What are other words that mean enormous, gigantic, legendary, big. It's Star Trek Voyager season five episode 20, juggernaut, revert course,

unless you've got something a little bigger in your torpedo tubes, I'm not turning around. I'm sorry. I've never seen a mail-on goofing around with toys, Adam. Kinda makes you feel differently about the mail-on, right? Right, you're not all just like,

pimply, boil-covered, guys in still suits, you know? Like, they've got a very like, harconin vibe when you see them at work. Yeah. But they're really fun-loving people at the end of the day. You take the worst person and you stick a little model in their hands and have them fly around the room with it. That's great, right? Change my mind. Look at the DJ on a dorsal plane. Impressive. Really sweet. So this guy's

flying his model ship around the bridge of a mail-on freighter. And he's, he's not looking where he's going. And he bumps right into Ron Canada. Is the juggernaut title about him as an actor? Because Ron Canada is fucking great. Somebody that looms as large over our imaginations as fans of Star Trek. As he does. God, just the best. Yeah.

I mean, because it's a youth flying a model around, and it's Ron Canada playing one of the characters, when this banger hits, you're rooting for the Maylonz. For the first time ever. You want him to get out of this problem. Yeah, you want the Maylonz not to die, not to suffer. This toxic waste leak is out of control and not even ejecting all of their toxic waste

into a planet nearby seems sufficient to solve their problem. Yeah, they're talking about, you know, like to save ourselves, we might have to doom an entire planet. And Rod can't just like, fine, look, I'm really okay with that. But in this case, I don't know if that's gonna solve the entirety of the thing. Yeah. But the, the, the tank ejection systems

aren't even working, man. We get a fun submarine-style death here when a lowly officer needs to be ordered into the tanks to fix a thing. Yeah. Knowing that they're going to die. He's sure going to buy the Tetri on farm or whatever. Uh-huh. Well, we're never going to see this character again. I mean, not playing this character anyway, because did you recognize him? This guy sent to his death

is the Vulcan guy with the hots for BLT. It is? This is the actor plays Vorik, Alexander Enberg. Oh, I totally assumed that he was the same as the guy that shows up at the end. I thought that the Melon Boogie man was this guy and that he was mad at them from the beginning specifically.

I completely misunderstood this episode. No, it's fine. All right. It's fine. And here's a way that I was able to remember if Ben is this guy is horny for danger. And he is ready to die for the cause. Yeah. He's worried about getting contaminated, but that's an order.

And orders his orders to down he goes. With what we learn about mail-on culture and like these jobs and how they're paid, I could have used a little dialogue twist in this like, you're going to pay my family extra for what I'm about to do because they're sure is a hierarchy in pay when it comes to dangerous jobs in a mail-on freighter. I mean, do you think controller Ron Canada is getting paid less than everybody else? He says that the people who work next to the core

are statistically... They have like a 30% chance of surviving the trip, but they get paid. Right, but their families get like a lifetime salary. Yeah. I'd take that deal any time. If you told me that I had a 30% chance of surviving recording podcasts about the entire run of Star Trek, and if I died in the process, my family would receive wealth beyond the dreams of Averis, I take that deal.

You get paid like one Maclroy's annual salary for doing it. Holy moly! Sign me up yesterday! That's fed, fed, fed. So that's our little cold open and we come back from the title sequence. We've got two Valk and a robe. And I thought it was Janeway over looking out the bum out window. But two Valks talking about managing your temper.

So it's not Janeway, it's BLT. And this is like Vulcan anger management, basically, is the class he's teaching. But it seems to have a lot in common with the class he taught Cass about how to freshen people up. In a way that made me a little bit concerned that BLT is not really the person you want to teach those lessons to. This does seem to be like a court mandated type of anger management training situation, right?

Because we learned that Chico Te has ordered her to learn how to meditate after smashing a Dacarazzi's camera in engineering. You can't do that. Yeah. I mean, she was getting out of the the Maybach trying to show up at the warp course that day and he's taking up skirts and it's like, hey man, just back off and let me get out of the fucking car. If I were ordered to meditate, Ben, that's maybe the only way I could do it daily. I've really fallen off.

Oh no, you used to really have that going as like a main thing every day. I don't know what happened. The pattern was broken and I'm struggling to put it back together. Oh man, I was really like optimistic about life in general when I knew, well at least Adam's out there meditating every day.

Yeah, time to lose that optimism. What a naive fool I've been at. Yeah, actually thought I would work on myself and stick with it. The rage within you runs deep. I'm not a vulgar, I'll survive. One of the questions she has asked us to call back a time in her childhood where her temper got the better of her.

And she rigged some schoolyard toy to nearly kill one of her classmates using her precocious engineering skills that she had as a child. I love this part, but not in the way that the episode wants me to. Like so many comedians have like an origin story of like, I used to really get picked on as a kid and like, I was like one of the smaller kids in my class. So I learned to use my sense of humor as like a way of protecting myself. I use my sense of humor as like a way of protecting myself

and that's sort of the same thing for BLT and engineering. Like she would get made fun of for her forehead ridges and she became an engineer to mangle her classmates if they ever said anything about them. Did this remind you at all of the story of work kicking a kid in half playing soccer? Do you remember that story that was completely glossed over? I can't believe I forgot about that. I had not felt the impact, but I had broken his neck and he died the next day. Oh my god!

So he kicked the kid and the kid just split into. Everyone welcomes back old war front star check the card season three completely forgetting the story of him kicking a kid in half playing soccer. Yeah, just raffi know about that. It's hard to fully love war, given that story. And does this change how you feel about BLT? She's the kid that the teachers pay a special attention to because they're like killing small animals and stuff. You know, like this, kids don't grow up right

when they start torturing their classmates. Yeah, she was called Miss Turtle Head when she was in elementary school. I was called Mr Turtle Head, but that was because I was already always like on the verge of taking a shit. We've like two college roommates, Ben. We've synchronized our jokes. I could have said that verbatim right on top.

Up on the bridge, two Valkas at his station later, and Paris comes up to him and is like, so have you managed to make my girlfriend's tolerable to be around? Paris comes up to him and is like, so have you managed to make my girlfriend's tolerable to be around? Serious question. Does Paris have a black eye in this scene? Oh, I think that's just a weird lighting thing. I feel like the light is coming from like,

like the key light that's on his face is coming from like too far off axis. And his nose is... He's got kind of a cardassian eye, doesn't he? Mm-hmm. I mean, which is all the rage right now, but I don't think that's what Paris is going for. Contouring is out, cardassian eye is in,

get on board, watch some YouTube tutorials. In a moment where someone is asking about their partner being violent, I think you gotta be sure that the person asking the question does never black eye during because it changes the whole mood. Hey Bestie, hang out with me while I get ready to rescue two out of the entire crew of I know you don't want to do it. Perfect black. Make it yourself. I'm trying to help you see this opportunity to grow. Make it yourself.

They pull up to this cloud and find that only Ron Canada and his little buddy with the model ship have survived. I love the commitment to a color palette that that may not have, right? Like these 37 brown escape pods are oddly beautiful floating in space, you know? Oh yeah, yeah. Like a really nice brown couch is, it's like a great centerpiece for any home. We're getting one of our weekly atmospheric rivers here in California and my across the street neighbors, I guess, got a new couch. So they put what looked like a very nice old couch out on the sidewalk like a night in

the river, like a nice like brown, fuller couch. And I went over and looked at it and I was like, dang, this couch doesn't really go with our stuff, but it is kind of a bang in couch. Maybe I should like pull it into my office or something. I thought about it. And then by the time I made up my mind and I was like, I'm going to go do it. I looked outside and it was like pouring rain. That couch is as soaked as the couch you have in your studio right now.

What good is that going to do? Yeah. I don't need to swap one wet couch out for another. You already have a wet ass couch. Yeah. There's some water in this couch. There's some water in this couch. Some water in this couch.

There's some water in this couch. I said sidewalk couch is brown. Made me want to go sit down. Wet ass cushioned soup or soap. Make your pants look like a joke. I'm really glad that Ron Canada is one of the two survivors here. It would have been sad if Ron died and they brought two randoms up, but...

Truly. Here they are in Six Bay. Only a few of us made it, he says, when he wakes up on the bio bed, and he introduces himself as controller, Fesseck, and then he like sits up and sees that there's only one other guy from his ship in there. And he's like,

I said, the rest are all like, you know, taking showers and like getting new outfits, right? And they're like, no. And there won't be any new outfits for any of you. Pelk grabs the doctor by his lapels. And he's like, where's my model? Tell me you saved my model. Sorry, kid, it's dead.

Yeah. The doctor does that thing that so many physicians do when they lose a patient. He just kind of like turns his head down and looks away. He pulls a sheet over the model and the biobad next next to Pell. He says, never gets any easier. Jade way wants to know what's wrong with their ship. And he's like, Oh, yeah, like we had this leak. And he's like, anyways, how far away is it? And she gives some very far

sounding distance. And he's like, fuck, we got to get out of here. It's too close. This scene is played for such drama, like a different kind of drama than we actually get because Fesik tells his story of Woe as if he's Captain Shaw from Jaws. But this guy is like the captain of the Exxon Valdez. Like he doesn't get cool points

for the storytelling moment at all. Yeah. And he's like, so the ship is definitely going to blow up. And when it does, everything in a three light year radius is going to be vaporized by what happens. So I would turn around and go to warp now. And Janeway calls this up to the bridge, Chicoetay tosses that order off to Paris, who steps on it and the engine, you know, they're like stuck in the mud. The radiation that the ship is giving off is so powerful, even this far away from it, that they cannot hit warp. What is it, Theta radiation? Sure is. You hate to hear about Theta radiation, right? Those guys are around probation. Yeah. After what they did to the dean.

So this is an intense moment because if they can't escape the blast radius of this ship, kind of their only shot is to fix what's wrong with the ship. So instead of turning away, they turned toward the freighter to try to fix it. Yeah. Fessick is not psyched about this. Like the if we can't get away from it, we should go toward it and forestall the explosion plan doesn't seem like a good point. Well, this is great because like, if the captain wants to go back onto his fucking gummy escape pod, that thing's not gonna reach escape velocity either, you know? There's coffee in your escape pod. The ultimatum is just stay on the ship or die.

So as they're in route to the ship, they're talking about like what the situation is over there. It's got life support, however, most of the decks of the ship are like flooded with irradiated gas. So if they go over there, they're gonna melt basically. I love how really, really interested everyone on Voyager is in beaming over and how both melons are like, you're fucking crazy.

Have you seen these fucking suits we have to wear? You guys don't have these suits. And all the BLT's piping up is really not productive here either. Every time she interacts with a melon, it's like, you guys should have thought of that before you built your entire economy on theta radiation. She has fallen off the meditation horse like I have. And it's just a real hair trigger.

Yeah. It's hard to be around the two of you right now. The mail-on captain has kind of a cool idea. Like why don't we hide in that nebular over there? That way the blast can't get us. And Jane was like, well what about the three other ships out here floating around? They can't make it to the nebula. And the mail-ons like... Socks for them. Yeah.

And BLT is like, well, maybe you should have thought of that before you took all this nasty toxic waste out here. Yeah. And then like, Harry Kim is like, uh, Captain, I'm scanning the nebula, and I'm getting some interesting biometric readings from it. And she's like, get chummy with Harry Kim. And you're all very proud. Who are you? Harry Kim. I lasted 20 minutes. And you're all very proud. Harry Kim. Who are you? Harry Kim.

Is there any kind of nebular that isn't to also alive? Ha ha ha ha ha. Tell him about the Vajar is what Pelks says. And Fesik is like, cat not the V a harigan. Yeah. Jesus. This fucking sucks. BLT is like, is that like a d'ahar, like a mastery of the ways of K-Less? Like maybe even if you kick a fellow student in half on a soccer field, you could become one and old age. I don't want to kick someone. The Vahar are creatures of legend that live in the storage tanks on these mail-on ships. And they're like yetis or bigfoot. Like the like people,

non-uncredible people claim they have seen the Vajar living on board melonships. What's he talking about? I see them! Nobody in the like square community has bought into this, you know, like Ron Canada is L7 and he doesn't buy this Vajar bullshit. All the goodwill that the,

that the Mala and built up in that first scene is now gone. As soon as I consider the Mala and don't give a shit about other people and they also cling to these bullshit superstitions, like they should be law for everyone else. Cool. These people are the worst.

Yeah. Down on the warp core, they're like working on a plan for how they're going to work their way through the ship. And it's going to be like a deck, go on to it, make your way to the next deck, vent that, go on to it. They're going to have to work their way through it. And it's vents and ladders, isn't it? It's like, yeah, it's much like the game of buttholes.

Nielux, for some reason, is the resident waste management expert on the crew and is going to be heavily involved in this away mission. And he has a special like, corduroy radiation suit for this one. Yeah, he's got action pajamas. And he's clearly the most comfortable person on this away mission later on. It looks so cozy, doesn't it? I was shocked that the most superstitious characters in this episode are also just fine with the radiation vaccine that the doctor has.

Yeah, I like when superstition comes up, Jicote is like, I'm all ears. Tell me more. Tell me more about the mythical beast. Yeah, I mean, somehow this crew has become Chicoote BLT Neelix and the two Maylon. After everyone else leaves the engineering section, Chicoote pulls BLT aside for a quick zip and is like, Hey, I know it's really tempting to you to start every sentence with, well, you should have thought of that before you dot, dot, dot. And I'm just sure to say that diplomacy is going to be the way on this one.

Also, I'm going to completely ignore being a make-weease together. And maybe that being a reason that you would listen to me over the captain, or any other kind of interesting way why our relationship would be. Like, why don't they refer to that ever anymore? Yeah, I mean, there should be a special kind of respect between BLT and Chico Te for that reason.

Yeah, we're like a, or like a, a short hand that we don't quite know what it means. Like, he says the thing about this is not coming from the captain. This is coming from me. But it would have been so much cooler if he'd said like, this is like, I'm a crown prime. Yeah.

You remember when we murdered those 2000 Cardassian assholes on that one planet? If you're good, it might feel like that. A greatest-gen live show is something you don't want to miss. Why? Well, it's a great opportunity to see me and Ben in person, but that's not all. FODs from all over gather at these shows to cosplay, to do pre- and post-show hangs, to make friends, and share their embarrassment. Hey, let's make a pretty great name for a tour. Let's do it! The Sherry Reembarishment Tour is coming in August 2023, and we've got a bunch of dates in a lot of great places.

Go to GreatestGenTour.com to get more info. That's GreatestGenTour.com for dates and ticketing information for the Sherry Reembarishment Tour. I'm Jordan Morris and I'm Jesse Thorne. On Jordan Jesse Go, we make pure, delightful nonsense. We were open awesome guests and bring them down to our level. We get stupid with Judy Greer. My friend Molly and I call it having the spaceweards. Pat Noswald. Could I get a ball-rock burger and some air-gorn fries? Thank you. And Kumail Non-Giani. I've come back with cat toothbrushes which is impossible to use. Come get stupider with us at MaximumFun.org. Look, your podcast apps are already open, just pull it out, give Jordan Jessie Goat try.

Being smart is hard, be dumb instead. Oh, rats, hey, hey, oh, I'm about to count you in line. These clouds are really freaking me out. I hate having to stand in line and boy, what do I? These giraffes do not smell good. No, they do not, and they've such short nacks. But I'm hearing we need to get on this. We've got to get on the art.

It is about terrain, it's about historic humanity. Hey, oh, sorry, sorry, sorry. Are you Noah? Yeah, I know we look like humans, but we're actually, we're podcasters. We are podcasters, so it's different. Have you heard of Ono Ross and Kerry?

We investigate spirituality, claims of the paranormal, stuff like that. And you have a boat and say the world's gonna end, so seem like something for us to check out. We investigate spirituality, claims of the paranormal, stuff like that. And you have a boat and say the world's gonna end, so seem like something for us to check out. We would love to be on the boat. We came to by two. What do you think? OnoRossinCari, available on MaximumFun.org.

I've got to get there. Lucknow put your luck number, your mouth. I've got to get there. Lucknow and I take this just to go home. Not no but your not no more your mouth. I've got to get that not no not it's just going. They're worried that this project is going to take kind of a long time because it's going to be slow going, working their way through this ship and there is going to be sort of a ticking clock because they're going to get an injection from the doctor that will protect them from the radiation, but it's gonna wear off. Unfortunately, Nelix doesn't want the injection.

He instead makes a soup of horse tranquilizer and broccoli cheese by the looks of it. I love that Tlaxians have a folksy home remedy for theta radiation. Crushed Ramaleef and Cattillion Klove. Sounds great. Ethan Phillips' performance of not wanting to put this in his mouth, like almost being afraid of putting it, not even that he's like disgusted, but that he like fears it, is very upsetting.

Is the idea that he has to eat it all? Because he made a lot. He can barely get one sip full down. And then like what he can't consume, he coughs back into the, into the dish. Oh. Chico Tei just pulls the a off the wall and puts up like a C for Chico Tei. Yeah, after having seen that. It's probably not bad if you dip a piece of crusty loaf

in there, you know? Hmm. A nice crusty loaf goes a long way. That'll solve for almost any soups in. Chicote is there to smell the soup and tell Nelix that if they had to go on a dangerous mission where someone could die, Nelix is his choice. And Nelix chooses to take this as a compliment instead of the awful truth that it actually is. I'm so glad you could be here with us to probably die. Hey, you're not wearing a uniform that looks like it's pretty expensive, right?

Why don't you change into something more expendable? [♪ Sound of a car engine sounds in the background, and the car engine sounds in the background, and the car engine sounds in the background, and the car engine sounds in the background, and the car engine sounds in the background, and the car engine sounds in the background, and the car engine sounds in the background, and the car engine sounds in the background, and the car engine sounds in the background,

and the car engine sounds in the background, and the car engine sounds in the background, and the car engine sounds in the background, and the car engine sounds in the background, and the car engine sounds in the background, and the car engine sounds in the background, and the car engine sounds in the background, and the car engine sounds in the background,

and the car engine sounds in the background, and the car engine sounds in the background, and the car engine sounds in the background, and the car engine sounds in the background, and the car engine sounds in the background, and the car engine sounds in the background, and the car engine sounds in the background, and the car engine sounds in the background,

and the car engine sounds in the background, and the car engine sounds in the background, and the car engine sounds in the background, and the car engine sounds in the background, and the car engine sounds in the background, and doesn't get punched in the face in the process. I feel like this is a particularly true thing of Tom Paris, but also a particularly true thing of Voyager overall, is that people are constantly like running to catch up with each other in the hallway. Yeah. I like that. TNG, we got lots of hallway walk in talks.

That was a normal thing, but in Voyager, people are always like, ooh, I see somebody way ahead of me in the hallway that I want to talk to you and and scenes always start with one person like finishing their trot to catch up. Paris really seems to be the pepilipu of this relationship. Can you remember a time where BLT was nice to him? I mean, I really can't. I'm friends that have that sort of dynamic though, and like it actually works for them. We don't hang out enough as couples

for you to say that. Where friction is like part of the attraction for some people, you know? Yeah, yeah, for some people, more friction is more pleasure. That's why she's ribbed for his pleasure. Nice moment for Paris and BLT. She does eventually soften up a little bit about the mission and may or may not promise to

not jeopardize everyone's lives. Because she didn't even write him like a chief O'Brien letter or anything. Or even give him a kiss goodbye, you know. She was just gonna go. Don't like that. Yeah, just asking for a little bit of consideration here. I don't think so. We're on the mail-on freighter for most of the rest of the episode.

And this is a great set. It really is. It is so fucking dirty. It is wet. It is smoky. It is dark. Really great job setting this up. The goo budget on this episode must have been through the roof.

Like they expended almost all of the budget on Ron, Canada, and goo. Smoke really does a lot of the work here too, right? Like who knows how big this thing is? But if you're smoking the corners of the frame, like a smoke even yet, yeah, it looks great. It turns out their try quarters are reacting with something in the atmosphere. So like when they initially get over there, there's tons of warflighting everywhere.

And it actually causes an explosion before they turn off the try quarters. And that's going to be an issue. And they're like, you know, they're walking around, they're trying to do the plan, right, which is like vent everything into space on the deck above them, close the doors, then go up to that deck. Do it the hard way, deck by deck, room by room.

And they're like walking over corpses and finding broken shit the entire time. BLT takes her tunic off off revealing the action tank top beneath. Wow, love to see it. And you'd love to see Chico Te pulling rank. Like he gets into this nose to nose with Ron Canada about like who's in charge of this mission. And turns out when when FESC abandoned ship mission and turns out when when Fesca band and ship it meant that it meant that this like reverted to a salvage operation. And so you're taking orders from Chicoete Fesca, not Fesca. Fesca? God fucking dammit. I did the thing that you were worried about. That's frequently how it goes.

But also, Chico Tei seems a little bit worried about extending trust to the Maylines. There's a thing that they're going to have to crawl into that's only big enough for two people. And Chico Tei wants one of his people to be one of the two on a thing like that. BLT is the tiniest for crawling of the three. So I guess this makes sense. Yeah, so she goes off with Fessik and they're kind of talking to each other about what his deal is while they're crawling

through this Melaan Jeffries tube. And we learn some interesting stuff about him. He has hobbies. He's got another career too. He's a sculptor and this is only a part time thing for him. And he considers it like a noble sacrifice for his, it's like, I feel bad for just characterizing the sculpting as a hobby.

That's just how my mind has been warped by this capitalist society. You can't possibly make a living doing something you love. He's like, he's like, I have a Patreon and. He's like, I have a Patreon and. He's like, I have a Patreon and. He's like, I have a Patreon and. He's like, I have a Patreon and.

He's like, I have a Patreon and. He's like, I have a Patreon and. He's like, I have a Patreon and. He's like, I have a Patreon and. He's like, I have a Patreon and. He's like, I have a Patreon and. He's like, I have a Patreon and. The amount I make has been privatized because it is He's like, I have a Patreon and. He's like, I have a Patreon and. He's like, I have a Patreon and. He's like point? And he also makes the argument that the mail-on are actually

very careful when they select their dumping sites. I mean, this is bullied a little bit by the them not giving a shit about the people that lived in the void issue in the episode that introduced these guys. But he's not, whoa, he feels very good about what their Society does with their unfortunate waste problem. The mail-on ships are filled with switches and It seems like a lot of them don't work like the mission. They're on involves hitting a lot of them and a lot of them malfunctioning And then they're needing to separate and go hit the backup switches as a result.

Well, there's just so much goo on everything. Like it's getting, it's coming up the works. It's getting into the way the switches operate. It's not surprised. You get a POV of the radiation monster that was mentioned before and he sees in VHS. Yeah, the the radiation monast monster sees PELK working alone. This is the first rule of of Maylon ship movies. You know, you don't want to have sex on the Maylon ship.

You don't want to work alone. Certainly PELK shows as nipples as the problem. And you just can't do that on a male on ship. Yeah, but uh hubba hubba am I right? That's what gets him in the monster's crosshairs. Yeah, if if Pell hadn't been such a naughty teen, he would have survived, but man, he gets attacked and you know they hear him they go they go rescue him they Like, Nielix is trying to minister to him, trying to give him some injections and stuff. But Pelt pretty quickly goes,

he says that he got attacked by the Vaharai before he like seizes up and goes into a coma and eventually dies. RSVP help. There are three instruments on being in stash of cat. Resurrected, bordal of the ship, and

do it, do it, do it. Kind of a great hero shot of Ron Canada when he steps up after his fallen comrad dies. And the camera orbits all the way around him and he says the shit just got real. Well, it's in this composition that you see. He's wearing a TC Tugger space suit.

Do you see this thing hanging off of the front of his belly? It keeps his still suit from sticking to his belly. And when you pull on it like that, it doesn't wrinkle up all the fabric. They're not like the snug. Chicoeté, who previously had been very paranoid about letting any of the mail-ons go off and do stuff by themselves, now isn't so much paranoid as just being like a big proponent of the buddy system. Yeah, so he says like no one works alone going forward.

He looks around and he's like, so everyone buddy up. Yeah. But where the hell is BLT? And BLT has done that thing that like John Rambo does in the second Rambo film where he covers himself with mud to blend in. BLT is covered in mail-on ship at this point. She is, she's looking real dirty. She looks totally rippled up, doesn't she?

She does. She looks tough as fuck in this episode. What you put her in charge? Great episode for BLT in that way. If you're getting a little overwhelmed with mail-on ship grossness, though, come take a little break with us on the bridge of the Voyager, which has no smoke and very little grease streaming down the walls. I will thank you for removing your shoes before you enter the bridge area.

They are talking about a contingency if keeping the freighter from blowing up the manual way, it doesn't work out. And Janeway wants two VAC to figure out how to redirect the travel trajectory of this ship to go into the corona of a nearby star, because that will somehow contain the theta radiation. Didn't you wonder why this wasn't a matter of mail-on policy to begin with? Just chuck this stuff and do the nearest star. But I guess they want, it's sort of like the space shuttle fuel things, right?

Like they burned them up for decades. Right. And now they're starting to reuse the fuel pods. Maybe the waste pods are too valuable starting to reuse the fuel pods. Maybe maybe the waste pods are too valuable to to send into the nearest star. The other thing I thought of is maybe it's maybe this putting it into a star is more a harm reduction strategy than a save everyone's strategy. Like at least it won't destroy everything for three light years. Like it will suck for like at least it won't destroy everything for three light years. Like it will suck for this sector for a long time,

but it won't like take out ships that had nothing to do with this three light years away. And on Star Trek, you can't be sure that that star isn't a star man. Mm. You know? So back on the Mail on Ship, BLT has developed blisters from this radiation exposure and she is resistant to going to a Mail on 6 Bay until Chicoote orders are there.

And what a great set within a set. This Mail on 6 Bay is they find it feels like a science fiction video game in there. Like it's hard for me to describe any other way, but it really feels like we've puzzled our way into alien six bay, and we've got clues in there about what happened on this ship, and why everyone's dead. And there's a, there's a melon on the bed.

And Fesik tells the story of what it's like to be a core laborer with a two and 10 survival ratio. It's the highest paying job on the ship and it is a difficult job to get. People want to work this job because of the great wealth that it can give you. Tough luck, huh? They make bank and if they die doing it, their families get that bank. Sounds like a, you know, if you had a terminal illness and knew you were going to die anyways, be kind of a good way to go out, like leave your family with a little nest egg or whatever.

Great way to go out. Love it. But yeah, he shows her the device he's going to jab her with to fix the freighter blight that is starting to affect her. And this thing has two huge fucking, huge fucking needles on it. And I'm not really a freak out about needles person, but when he shoves this thing into her neck, I was like, fuck this, fuck this, fuck this episode. If you're gonna have needles, the size of chopsticks,

like you must have the character flinch when they, when two of them go into her fucking neck. It's so upsetting that she doesn't flinch. Like somehow it's more... Why does it she flinch? It's more upsetting that she doesn't flinch. Exactly. Exactly. Oh.

Oh. Oh, it's so gnarly. I'd rather be a core laborer than ever look at that again. Like the thing that Fesit could be injecting into BLT's net could be Boba. Like that's how big the gauge of these needles are. Two Boba straws going in and she doesn't even flinch.

They must have some kind of like antiseptic or a sedative thing on them. You know how you can't feel the proboscis of a mosquito. Yeah. Until later. Yeah. It's got that numbing spray on its nose. Yeah.

Yeah. Back in the Aslab, seven and two Vox Discuss Janeway's plan. And it's clear that plans B and C are viable. And plan D, seven has two of those already. Yeah. What was Plan C again? It's like strengthening their own shields. So it's like a mush the ship toward the star

and also strengthen their defenses against the blast. Yeah, like special tuning for the shields that would predict against this particular type of radiation. Right. Tuvak very pleased with her work radiation. Right. Tuvak, very pleased with her work. And hey, Tuvak, her work is up here. Serving with Captain Jane Lay has taught me otherwise. When we cut back to the mail-on ship,

they're trying to decompress the deck above them. But when Fessik was punching in, which deck to decompress, he said, let's Deacon Press deck, D- SEV-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O is quickly escaping the room, they have to climb up the ladder more quickly than they had anticipated. This scene made me think the set was much bigger than I initially thought because there's a lot of running and laddering. There is. I don't know how much of this they built, but it seems like they built a ton. Does it seem like a borg's ship redress to you?

It kind of felt like that in some places. They might have been able to recycle some of the standies or whatever, just like dump more goo on them. Yeah. Cause bored ships are not totally dry, but they're not this wet. Yeah. That's what she says. While they're panicking and scrambling around trying to get out of here,

we see the alien POV again. We also see Chico Te catch a pipe in the face. Oh, yeah. Episode is fucking rugged. As much as you flinched about the Boba Stra needles, this is the one that got me. Yeah. Nice POV of the Shrapnel too, right?

Yeah, you just see it like coming straight at the camera. I guess it's a CG pipe, but it's really convincing. And they have to like beam them directly to 6 Bay. Chicocha is not there to supervise anymore. Yeah. Not there to pull rank on the mail-ons. And without Chicocha kind of holding together the command structure, shit starts to fall apart in an interpersonal way.

Good thing they have the morale officer there, right? But they're getting watched by the predator cam. And we see like the rubbery hand of the predator cam guy. What's troubling is the longer you think about what he might be doing watching them. And what's going on here seems pretty pervy, doesn't it? Because there are moments in the episode where the characters are like touching a railing, and it's covered in like a non-specific goo.

Oh, yeah. He's turned this whole ship into his Nike shoe box. And I mean, if you'll remember the very first moments they beamed over can't use the tricorder. So they're black lights don't work over there. Yeah, that'll set the warflighting off again. Yeah, yeah. Yuck.

I'm giving you an order. I'm giving you an order. It's bad under sprit. I'm giving you an order. I'm giving you an U.M. just crossed the line. With Jakote out of there, two VAC is really concerned and goes to the captain and it's like, I think I should probably beam over there and help with the efforts of the away team because right now BLT is in charge if I'm doing the math correctly and given her rage issues, I think we know that that's not a great plan and

Janeway is like despite all BLT's rage. I am still just a captain who trusts And too, because like I do not believe that rhymes like a song should I do not believe that rhymes like a song should. Perhaps you could use something with the previous episode about despite all your rage, they've cured the Videan Fage. Hmm. And Janeway, it like takes the note, but she's like, we're going to leave BLT in charge because I'm kind of like trying to give her a little bit of self bit of self confidence right now.

Yeah. I'm going to choose being a good captain over writing a good song. What is BLT doing meditating while they're exposed to this amount of radiation? We don't have time for this shit, especially because Nielix gives her a way to get off the hook because Nielix is like, oh, oh, BLT, you must be really tired from all the radiation. BLT should have been like, yeah, tired from the radiation and definitely not doing embarrassing meditation.

That's not what I was doing. Is that why you stopped? You got embarrassed? Yeah, I mean, Nelix laughs about it. When you get caught meditating, you do not want the person catching you to laugh. It's, you'll never be able to meditate again after that.

Yeah, what are you doing? Meditating with that tube sock. You know, at a certain age, it gets harder and harder to meditate to begin with. You don't need all these extra obstacles. But then you're like, maybe I should like order something to help, you know, an aid if you will.

Sure. And then you're like, but I don't want to like, I don't want it to like show up at the house and then my wife open it, you know. And it would just be my luck too, that I would be found meditating. And that's how I would go out.

You know, I like to meditate with the headphones in it. How about you? I know that. And most of the crowd at our San Francisco show knows that. I think it was our L.A. show. Yeah, because my mother-in-law was there. That came up. We don't have time to argue about what happened. We've got to keep moving. So they finally make the control room of the mail-on ship, but unfortunately, with 10 minutes left until it blows,

all of the switches they hit don't seem sufficient to fix their problem. And in Six Bay, the doc asks Chicoete what happened to kill the male on over there. The doc is like something that is impervious to radiation. And so he has seven recalibrate the centers to scan for it. And back on the male on ship, this plan A thing isn't going to work. And now that they've picked up the radiation monster that's going toward them, like plan B is the only thing they can do.

Yeah, so they're real time trying to fix the ship when they learn that there's a killer alien that is actively throwing Sebo into the gears of the freighter. And they start to panic because there's something moving in here and it ain't them. I love the graphic in the Aslanb showing this. She's got a whole cross-section schematic of the ship and she can zoom in on specific hallways. So cool. It's great. I love it. It's getting super gassy on the mail-on freighter, though, and that only adds to the tension, right? Yeah, because you

can't fire a phaser and all that gas. It's just going to, I mean, like, if you had shields and could go to warp at my command, you might be able to survive something like that. The best chance you got is this length of metal pipe and flailing it around. Yeah So BLT starts just kind of clubbing everything that moves with this Rebar It's a real double dragon moment when when like the the crowbars flashing in the street And you pick it up. I think she, she even clocks Ron Canada with this

thing. It's a little unclear. I thought so too. Yeah. She clubs the TC Teogra right off the front of him. But then she gets into a stick fight with this radiation zombie. And this radiation zombie believes himself to already be dead. He's a meylon that got irradiated and didn't die. He's somehow adapted to being immune to theta radiation. And so he's like trying to show like the real truth about what happens to core workers or something. And he doesn't care who he has to take out to make his statement. I mean, environmental terrorism, just the worst scourge of the galaxy, right?

Where do these people get off? Like, who are they to tell us that we can't kill this whale? This this climactic moment turns into a like can BLT use her diplomacy skills and her anger management skills to solve the situation and the answer that this episode provides is how about new she's gonna hit this guy with a pipe of buns to save the day. BLT is a hard pipe hitting cling on it turns out. Yeah, and that doesn't mean that she enjoys the use of crack cocaine. She's literally hitting people with pipes. Up until the very last moment, I thought BLT was going to both hit and save this guy.

Right. But it's the Ron Canada character that she picks up and helps to beam away. That kind of made me sad. This core laborer guy gets the shit piped out of him. But unclear whether or not he's dead until the ship goes boom. He didn't deserve what happened to him. He made some bad decisions in reaction to that, but it is a little bit uncomfortable. What goes down here?

Can you be prosecuted for murder if the person you murdered said that they're already dead? Oh, that's a loophole actually. Yeah. That's whathole, actually. Yeah. That's what I'm thinking. Yeah. Go easy on yourself, BLT. He said he was already dead. It's fine. Yeah. So BLT swings the pipe, hits the switch and drags Ron Canada to a place where they and Nielix can beam away. And this ship coast coast into the star.

It blows big. And we're back in Six Bay where a very dirty BLT is congratulated by Chico Tay and the doc in that very same room tells the male on captain that there's nothing he can do to save him. It's so mean. Like, B-O-T, all you need is a Sonic shower. You'll be ready to work tonight. But this poor bastard, he'll be dead before the morning.

In less happy news. I guess we'll drop you off with your people or whatever. I hope you didn't leave a lot of unfinished sculptures back at your workshop. Hope that mail-on ship is really hitting the pedal to the metal. I was really hoping we were getting a recurring character for Ron Canada here, but we are not. Ron Canada is the only thing recurring, and I like it. It's an occupational hazard. So, a Bilti heads back to her quarters. She is still totally caked with radioactive

melon grease. She gets into the sonic shower and has like a flashback to beating the fuck out of that guy with the pipe. Yeah, and then she moves closer to the nozzle of the sonic shower. She's like, oh yeah. That was fucking great. I surprised the episode ended with full frontal nudity and a masturbation sequence. Did you like this episode, Adam? You know, I'm maybe even to get along with most of the time,

but I don't like bullets, I don't like threats, and I don't like you. I'm just stupid. Was this episode a jugger or a juggernaut? Is really the question. What an episode of Greatest Jen. Is it I think? Yeah, somebody on the Reddit was like,

Ben and Adam don't talk about film production techniques anymore. Yeah. It's really sad. Yeah, I believe I told that person to stick a finger in their ass. It was a great return to Reddit for me. Yeah. That was Adam's first and last time on Reddit and a lot. I'll say this. I mean, big ups for a Ron Canada episode, big ups for a great set, the Malaun ship set amazing.

How dirty, Roxanne Dawson was willing to get. Holy moly, like full Ripley cosplay here. She was great in this. I don't know how many more Malaun stories you can tell. If this is it for the Malaun, I'm satisfied that we've done all the Malaun. Yeah. There's sort of like a Babylon 5 aspect to how this episode looks and feels though. Did you feel that at all?

It is a little bit Babylon 5-E. It's got... I can't explain that. It's got a little dusting of Bruce Boxmuntcher. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I should be able to articulate why that is, but I think all you B5 stands out there.

Well, know what I mean. When I say that this one is a little B5 adjacent, a fun episode, fun episode to talk about, I might be done with the junk people. What about you? And not wild about the way they tie this one up. Like, oh, you're not. I kind of like the show shower, but she'll never feel clean kind of,

kind of ending this. The silk wood effect. I'm not saying that. I'm saying the like, like, bludgeon to death, the victim of a, uh, of a toxic radiation accident because you disagree with his plan of action. He was already dead, Ben. I know, I'm just saying it.

It's a little bit more of a battle on five ending to this thing than, you know? Yeah, sure is. Star Trek usually is about like finding like common ground and that kind of thing. So all that said, I thought it was a really fun episode to watch. And dude, anytime you bring Ron Canada into into an episode of Trek, I'm on the edge of my couch. I love it. Yeah, give me more hero shots with Ron Canada. Bring Ron Canada onto new trek. What are they doing? What are they doing? Telling me run Canada won't pick up the phone

14 Redditors and people on Twitter are gonna be like yeah actually Ron Canada and double rainbow guy like they died together Surprise you didn't know that No run Canada still acting hell you new Wu Tang series acting. Hell yeah. He's the new Wu Tang series. God, of course he is. He's in all the good stuff. People also ask is Ron Canada his real name?

Answer, Ronald Ellis Canada is an American actor with a specialty in portraying judges and detectives. Ha ha ha. I wonder if he's related to Jeffrey Canada. Great question. We can only hope. We may never know, Ben. But one thing I do know is that we've got some priority one messages. Just waiting for us.

Yeah, we gotta get to those. Priority one message from Starfleet coming in on Secured Channel. Need a supplement? A supplement? A supplement? A supplement? A supplement. Yes, extra. The interest alone could be enough to buy this ship.

Adam, our first priority one message is of a promotional nature. And it goes like this. They say time is the fire in which we burn. Then perhaps today is a good day to check out don't call it Time Travel.com. It's a 2023 short story project where every Sunday all year long, you'll find a new short story about, well, you know, from time loops to line hopping, just don't call it time travel. Oh, all friends of DeSoto everywhere should come join a stranger and enjoy speculative

tales about probabilities in the fourth dimension. Just listen to this review. Wow, so I guess Chief O'Brien has given the O'Brien stamp of approval to Don't Call It Time Travel.com and you can head to don'tcallittimetravel.com for a new story every Sunday. I like this. You're not subscribing to a thing, you're not signing up for a thing.

You're going to a website every Sunday and you're reading a new publication. It looks like there's already 12 stories on here. What about that? That's a lot of stories. Yeah. Just don't call it time travel, right? Oh, that's not what they are. Look, that is for time travelers to say that is not for you to say.

Yeah, that's not your word. Well, that's something that I'm gonna check out on Sundays. JT Cross is the author of those stories, and I hope other friends of Disodor will check them out as well. Ben are next priority when messages from Nikki and it's to Grant, that message goes like this. I thought I'd spend some tax refund money supporting this rad podcast you introduced me to.

I was a way to mark the end of our two-year adventure, reading Lord of the Rings together. Whoa. Who knows when this will air? So maybe that be birthday, Mary Christmas, or just I'll call you Wednesday morning, like always.

And in parentheses, it says to be clear, this is your gift for all of this year's occasions. Yeah, don't get greedy, Grant. You got your gift. Yeah. Nikki knows great value in the catch all of a priority one message. I love just just checking off all of those boxes in one fell swoop. Well, we've got one last prayer to you message here from Notorious FOD, and it is two, Elon

Musk can eat a bag of dicks, and it goes like this. This is more of a comment than a question, but everyone knows when you pass Go in Monopoly, you collect $200. What my theory presupposes is, shouldn't you guys be doing a power hour every time you pass Square-Hundred in the game of Bloodholes, even when you don't land on it? Please debate this topic as Kevin Oxbridge and Kern, Resulter Legally Binding. The problem with playing board games that last a certain amount of time is that I do not

remember where I last left off. Therefore who's to say which episodes are power hour squares. If we make every time we pass 100 a power hour square, then potentially aren't all squares everywhere power hour squares given the existence of the caretaker square. Ben, I don't know how many power hours I can do. I had exactly two beers last night and woke up with a hangover. I don't know what's going on with me. Well, it sounds like you're a 40 plus year old man or some shit. You know, I'm almost out of brod is what I am

and we need to make with the brod quote, ASAP. Oh man, yeah. Check in with our buddy at the brod company and see if he would like to sponsor the show again and maybe get the FODs a deal for next time they want to order some brodes. We definitely have to have that code before STLV. I already won, that would be great. Yeah. If not, I still have at least enough for the two of us, for us, SDLV, so. You and me and no one at the Pranika Cabanika. Yeah.

BIO Brode is gonna be the rule this year. We will not be providing them. What? You, I can't hear you. I only brought Brode for me. Me then. I only brought brod for me! Me then! If you've got something to say to all friends of Disoto everywhere, make it a priority

one message over at MaximumFund.org slash jumbo-tron. Uh, well, at a, uh, it's time, I believe, for me to ask you a question. It's finally gonna happen, isn't it? What do you have to ask me, Ben? Do you have yourself a drunk Shimoda for this episode? Incredible. Drunk Shimoda! Oh, that's your question.

Yeah. All right. We never heard back from that couple that there was a proposal in a P1 right before the max fund drive hasn't happened yet Yeah, oh this is killing me I keep thinking about it the network has to know to float that reply to the top right? I got a text Danny butterway that the network see what's going on because if that's coming and and he put it down at the bottom That's the wrong way to play this. We gotta find out.

Yeah, pretty unfortunate way to start the whole employee ownership situation over there at the network, right? I already drafted these very important messages. Yeah, yeah. Do you think it's possible that this dude got proposed to, but then lost his job like on the same day? Like, is it real like, you know,

take the good with the bad kind of day, but also like I'm not dropping 100 bucks to reply to you kind of a deal. God. Oh, I hope not. That looks so. I'm just trying to put good out into the world. Good feelings, good vibes.

I hope we hear good news from them soon. Fingies crossed. Adam, did you have a drunken motor? The the mail-on engineer who runs around with a little model mail-on ship. Yeah. That's about as joyful as it gets on a mail-on freighter, isn't it?

It really is. Find the joy wherever you can. And as a superior officer, it can be tempting to, you know, scold a crew person for enjoying some of their idle time aboard a ship. But Ron Canada is my drunk Shemota for tolerating that behavior. And also for being Ron Canada. Helke has made that model for Ron Canada's kid. So I think that's part of the arithmetic there.

It's like, Ron Canada could be like, God, you're so annoying with the model, but I usually promise my kid I'm gonna bring something home from one of these missions and I forgot to pick that up. So, PELK, you'd really be doing me a solid. And the gift shop at the freighter port If you could just go ahead and give me that model. I think that would really really get me out of jail at home

Next episode of the show is season five episode 21 someone to watch over me the Doctor tries to introduce seven of nine to the concept of dating. Does the doctor introduce her to that concept in the form of dating him? I hope not. Yeah, that would be weird. That would be a weird way to take on your role as an instructor. Yeah. Speaking of roles at them, I've got to roll the dice here at the Game of Buttholes. The Will of the Caretaker, where our runabout is on square 57. Looks like there's a space butthole we could hit, which would take us to a quark's bar. And I think that's the only thing in range. You're required to learn as you play. Roll.

So I'm gonna go ahead and roll this thing. I rolled it one. Tula! Did I win? Hardly. So we're on square 58, regular episode next week. And that quartz bar remains in play. All right.

I'm gonna go ahead and roll this thing. I rolled it one. Tula! So we're on square 58 regular episode next week and That courts bar remains in play All right I like having that out there Waiting I like having friends of DeSoto out there all over the country all of the world It's a worldwide population of the best people friends DeSoto Meet each other proposing to each other. Not replying to those proposals. Right.

Who are we to judge? There are lots of places all over to hang out with those friends of DeSoto. There's a mastodon at friendsofdeSoto.social. And, boy, there's just so many great folks all over all different types of social media. But, you know, make it a fun time to hang out online and talk about Arshot, talk about Star Trek,

make Dick and Fart jokes, et cetera. I am way, way, way overdue for an appearance on the Discord. One of my favorite places to interact with friends at Dissoda, you can find that at DrunkShemota.com. If you're going to websites, maybe check out PodChap.biz and get yourself a bit of merch. That's a great way to support our show and also wear it on your chest or wear it on your coffee mug.

We got to thank Windy Pretty, the producer and editor of this fine program. We got to thank Bill Tilly, our social media director, who runs the greatest track accounts on MassDone Instagram and other social media platforms. And you got to thank Adam Ragusia, who made the original theme music for this show, one of the best. Adam Ragusia has his own podcast, great podcast, and a YouTube show. With that, we will be back at you next week with another great episode of Star Trek Voyager, and an episode of the greatest generation Voyager where the doctor tries to get seven to date us

and somehow we're not enough man for her both the two of us together not enough man not a surprise I think she would call us insufficient That'd be a very Borg put down. You're a picker, car, car, car, car. Maximumfund.org Comedy and culture Artist-owned Audience-supported