The Greatest Generation - That Slick Thicc (TNG S1E23)

Episode Date: September 28, 2026

When Counselor Troi’s shuttle crashes on Vagra II, the Entrepreneur sends a rescue team down to find a highly-flammable entity made of Metamucil and printer ink. But after several failed hostage neg...otiations and some serious therapy, Armus’ temper makes Picard want to nuke the sight from orbit. Which host is a “do not disturb” and why? Who else has the right skills to be security chief? How is Armus like God? It’s the episode with a dank and vile pivot for the elevator vending machine.Support the production of our shows Members get benefits including bonus episodes and an ad-free experienceSign up for our mailing list!Get a thing at podshop.biz!The Greatest Generation is hosted by Adam Pranica and Benjamin Ahr Harrison The show is produced by Wynde PriddySocial media is managed by Rob Adler and Bill TilleyMusic by Adam Ragusea & Dark MateriaDiscuss the show using the hashtag #GreatestGen and find us on social media:YouTube | Instagram | BlueskyAnd check out these online communities run by FODs: Reddit | USS Hood Discord | Facebook group | Wikia | FriendsOfDeSoto.socialSupport the production of The Greatest Generation Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Starting point is 00:00:01 Want to hear an ad-free version of this show? Go to greatest.supercast.com. Here's to the finest crew in Starfleet. Engage. Welcome to the Greatest Generation. It's a Star Trek podcast by a couple of guys, just a little bit embarrassed about having a Star Trek podcast. I'm Ben Harrison.
Starting point is 00:00:31 I'm Adam Pranica. An away game for you today, Adam. Sure is. What's that like? I mean, you've been to Seattle before. it's like that. Yeah. I've stayed in hotel rooms in Seattle
Starting point is 00:00:46 occasionally for a month at a time. Yeah. I mean, nice time of year to be there, right? I was talking to my buddy Phil last night at dinner and he mentioned how much he liked staying in hotels and then like you leave for a moment and you come back and everything's all tucked in because the housekeeping could come.
Starting point is 00:01:06 And I told him, I don't like that. And I am a do not disturb. on the door person almost constantly. And he looked at me with horror. So my question for you is, what type are you? I think you know that I'm a do not disturb. And this stems from my days traveling with lots of expensive film equipment. And, you know, I'm not like, I'm not really worried about the housekeeping staff.
Starting point is 00:01:35 But, you know, if you've got a piece of luggage that has five or six, $40,000 a piece, lenses in it that you rented and will owe someone for if they disappear. You just try to like shave off every possible opportunity for those to be unattended in a place where someone you don't know might be. The stakes aren't as high for me. I'm just someone who doesn't want their toothbrush touched. Right. Yeah. And I think that like maybe what it's evolved into is just like give the fucking staff a break. And like when I tip them at the end, It's like the tip is for the whole time, but they got to not have to deal with my room. Right.
Starting point is 00:02:18 They're dealing with it at the end. I feel the same way. They're getting what they'd be getting throughout just at the end of it. One thing I ran into recently was we were in a hotel in Denver with the kids. You get them a separate room yet? When's that day coming? They had a separate room. It was like a, it was a sweet-style hotel where we had a little kitchen and a little
Starting point is 00:02:41 little living room area and then two bedrooms. The nanny stay with them or are they not there yet either? No, no, no, no, no nanny. We're not, we're not traveling with, with household. Is that day coming? But maybe if we can get like another hundred thousand listeners for the podcast, I wish. But, yeah, I mean, the thing we struggled with is when you have little kids, you generate vastly more garbage than you do without. And we were like, we don't really want to like make a maid come in here and like step over all the brio trains and matchbox cars that we brought. But we do have a lot of garbage to get rid of. And as we were talking about this, we stepped out into the hall. And I saw that somebody else on the hall had just left their waste paper baskets from their room right outside their door.
Starting point is 00:03:34 And I was like, this is great. Perfect solution. Leave them outside the door the same way you would leave the tray of room service. I think both of those things suck, and I am a complete disagreement on that behavior. Wow. Oh, interesting. So you do not want people to dispose of their detritus in that way. Oh, yeah. It's super fun to come back from an evening out and walk through a hallway full of trash. Yeah, that's great. Adam, there's like free French fries in some of those, you know? Not everybody eats all the French fries when they get room service. I've never agreed with Jerry Seinfeld more than when he talked about getting a French fry off of somebody's.
Starting point is 00:04:11 I'm glad you don't agree with Jerry Seinfeld on other things. So you set your garbage can outside and what else? Your trays, maybe a few of the lesser-loved brio trains. Did you see this as an opportunity to reduce the amount of toys and trains? Or are you packed out exactly what you packed in? We packed out what we packed in minus some garbage. But I feel very judged. I feel like maybe I'm a bad person.
Starting point is 00:04:41 now, now that you've said this. It's a day that ends in why, Ben. Maybe some process could be applied to, like, get whatever it is in me that does these bad things out onto the surface and then peeled away. Yeah, if you could remove those parts of you, Ben, would you just put them in a garbage can outside of a hotel room? Let's find out as we explore one of the most important episodes of this series. it's Star Trek the Next Generation,
Starting point is 00:05:12 season one episode 23, The Big Goodbye, which is what I'm calling skin of evil because of what happens at the end. Yeah. It always works on me. I'm always like, fuck, did I do the wrong thing?
Starting point is 00:05:29 Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. Our cold open shows a very different-looking Enterprise D. And before you hear the law, I was thinking, did Paramount Plus screw up the transfer on this? Why are the nacelles dark? This isn't how it's supposed to look at all. The nacelles are dark because they're undergoing some routine dilithium maintenance. And they have to pick up Troy, who is returning from a conference on a shuttle, but no warp at the moment.
Starting point is 00:06:06 And that means they're traveling at impulse. Given the vastness of space. and how fast warp drive is and how slow impulse drive is, would you ever consider just like staying at full stop instead of going at impulse? In the kinds of sci-fi where faster than light travel does not exist, often what you're reading about is ships that spend a lot of time really close to the speed of light and their cruise experience really intense time dilation because they're constantly accelerating until they need to flip it around and constantly decelerate to not be going at an insane rate of
Starting point is 00:06:55 speed when they arrive at whatever their destination is. And I wonder if going at impulse causes some time dilation if you leave it on too long. Like, yeah, we were at impulse for like two days and afterward, like, I called my niece to wish her like a happy birthday because she was turning eight. And a fucking PhD candidate picked up the phone, you know? Yeah, Picard had hair two days ago. It's crazy. The warp bubble protects you from that, right?
Starting point is 00:07:26 Yeah. Well, they don't have that protection. And also not having any protection is Tasha Yarr in the martial arts tournament. She will have only her wits to defend her. She's a fox. In French, she would be called La Renard. A valid assumption. But Worf has bet heavily because he's apparently not in the martial arts tournament.
Starting point is 00:07:48 Maybe because it would be unfair, he would just, like, sever too many heads from too many bodies. There's a lot in this moment. There is Tasha Yard being delighted that Worf has this much faith in her ability. But Worf says pretty specifically that she is a sure thing. which in my mind, as a gambling man, uh, means this isn't much of a gamble at all. The fix is in.
Starting point is 00:08:14 Yeah. It doesn't pay that good if you bet on a sure thing, right? Like, you're not getting good return on, on your bet. I mean, it's just a semantic thing. Like,
Starting point is 00:08:24 to him, sure thing is he's sure she's going to win. I think it's less about the odds. Oh, I got you. Man, I would really love to have people bet on me. That would be nice.
Starting point is 00:08:35 Anyways. People do bet on you, Ben. is a long shot. I bet on you all the time. Betts, bets, bets. If that thing hits, it hits big. I bet Ben is going to attend this meeting. I do it all the time.
Starting point is 00:08:52 Man, and you're pretty deep in the hole. A lot of guys around town want to break your thumbs to get the money you owe, right? This week in particular has been a down week for the bank girl. Distress call from the shuttle audio only. The pilot, Ben, reporting a systems failure is not looking good. They're getting really bad telemetry from the shuttle. And Picard is like, hey, we need to get moving. I got to call engineering.
Starting point is 00:09:22 I got to call engineering and have a very rapid fire conversation with someone. I hope they don't tell me their first name and middle initial when they pick up the phone. Ben Engineering. Lieutenant Commander Leeland T. Litch here, sir. We don't have time for that. I love how this moment is repeated several times, and every time you could see Picard kind of reflexively roll his eyes slightly. I've never read about what went into this. I know that there was like the Biff Yeager scandal probably 10 episodes ago at this point for the people producing this show.
Starting point is 00:09:59 But they've had a couple of different people take a swing at being the chief engineer now. and this guy feels like he's in here being the chief engineer as a bit of a joke on the fact that they've had so many people as chief engineers now. They should really write a book about the production of this show because I too would like to know how they got here and how eventually it became Jordy. I wonder if Lovar Burton knew in the first season that like, hey, we're introducing your character on the bridge because we need a way for people to get to know you. early on in the series. We will eventually transfer you to the back. Where you're going to be doing the engineering stuff and you're going to get a promotion in the process.
Starting point is 00:10:47 Man, LeVar Burton really betrayed his values. Letting them push him all the way to the back. God damn. This is that moment that feels a lot like, you know, an emergency is happening in like another part of the country. Like, oh, shit. a parent is sick several states away. We got to get there now. And without warp drive, that is seeming like it's an impossibility. Leland-Tel Lynch is estimating at least 20 minutes to put the
Starting point is 00:11:19 dilithium crystals back in to the warp drive. And it seems like they are so volatile, based on the way they're carrying them around like two men on a little tray, carrying them very gingerly across the engineering section. And he's like committed to doing a rush job because they don't have 20 minutes. It's hilarious how careful they're treating them here. And after the theme, it's like loading a commercial dishwasher with with restaurant dishes, like pulling down the handle and like slamming those babies in. Shuttle goes down.
Starting point is 00:11:59 Lynch is overriding the checklist to get the core started up. Do we trust this guy? to do that? He sets the intermix ratio at 25 to 1, and we know that that's wrong. From Wesley's Academy, like, Wesley Crusher could have been in there doing a better job than Leland T. Lynch. If I'm Leland T. Lynch, how am I not calling data down there to maybe do an assist on this stuff? I just want to see the fan edit of Leland T. Lynch overriding the checklist, setting the intermixed
Starting point is 00:12:36 ratio to 25 to 1 saying, all right, initiate warp core and then cut to the exterior and the ship explodes. In that way, not just Tasha Yard dies this episode. They all do. They all do. They all went out together doing what they loved. And isn't that kind of the dream? I love how there is some confusion about what minimal warp capability is as soon as they get
Starting point is 00:13:10 the engines fired up. because Leland T. Lynch is like, okay, baby it, captain. As you should know, I have done none of the normal checklists that are usually related to this process. And the card's like, floor it, warpate. You heard the order, Mr. Lynch. Make it so. Yes, sir. Data has no signal from the shuttle.
Starting point is 00:13:31 Planet, not a great part of town. Seems like it is a place we don't have much on record for because it's not much to look. at the kind of place you might send a terraforming crew, but they would probably ignore the sludge, like trying to make sand castles and stuff outside the window. What if we combined these two storylines? You could see it, couldn't you? Yeah. Breathable air, though, so that's good. Yeah. Worf locates the shuttle, but they can't figure out if anything is alive when they scan for life forms because it's buried. you. Very interesting detail here in that they should be able to determine this. Right. And it's
Starting point is 00:14:19 unclear what it's buried beneath that would prevent it. Bad censor readings mean not safe to transport either. So they're like, all right, let's send an away team down to look. And Beverly Crusher has like a police scanner in her office. And she's been listening to comms traffic the whole time. So when they radio down to her. She's like, yeah, I already got my med kit put together. I'm on my way to the transporter room. And they arrive to a dusty barren planet with a sky that is uncomfortably close on the horizon and a crash shuttle that's lost both nacelles. Here is where the big mistake happens. If they had just transported a little bit closer to the shuttle, None of what happens for the rest of the episode goes down the way it does.
Starting point is 00:15:16 This is the exact same problem they ran into with Strange New Worlds where they transported like two kilometers away from the ship and there was a T-Rex in between them and the ship they needed to go to. I know. I know. Why not take another shuttle down to the surface, Ben? That's an interesting idea, but that is not what they did. And instead, there is this, what Riker reports.
Starting point is 00:15:41 as a slick blocking their path. And Picard is like, you mean like an orphan? Like a kid who has no connection to his family or they've maybe died? You think this is slick back? This is pushback. I would not describe what we're looking at here as the viscosity of something slick.
Starting point is 00:16:02 Like sometimes if you put too much liquid in your oatmeal, that would be slick. This is thick. This is barbecue sauce. This slick, thick, and scanning it doesn't give them any useful information. Like, data's, like, there's no organs, there's no brain, there's no muscles. I could not tell you why this thing is moving around. I don't know what it is.
Starting point is 00:16:29 Were you surprised that in all the ways that we've noticed this show being remastered for its, re-release that the moving sludge effect was almost totally unchanged and unimproved when this thing moves around? I was trying to imagine what it was. Is it just like a garbage mat that they're moving around the frame? And then they just have kind of like a silky black texture behind. It sure looks like it. I don't know how you don't improve that if given the chance. It kind of seems like you could. It does. It doesn't look great. but it does start to take shape and talk to them. First, slamming data as a tin man.
Starting point is 00:17:19 Very good tin man. I don't personally like using that slur, but I think if you're comfortable with it, we should keep it in the show. I mean, I'm just quoting. Is that, is it bad? If I'm just saying it as something somebody else said, it's not something I said,
Starting point is 00:17:35 I'm quoting somebody else. I can say it, right? In that way, I agree with you 100%. If you're quoting... Then it's fine. You can say anything. Some of my favorite songs call people tin men. And I'm just doing karaoke, guys.
Starting point is 00:17:48 Say it loud and proud, Ben. Starts talking to them. And Picard is like, okay, like, play it cool with whatever that is. Like, all he has heard is slick. And the thing that comes up and plays in reverse is this kind of vaguely guy-shaped guy. I love the, like, like, the glit. blobs like raising up onto the arm parts of it. This is Armis.
Starting point is 00:18:16 And Armis, very polite, introduces himself and then asks, what are you doing here? What are you guys up to? I am not current on the children's literature, the way you have got to be at this moment. This reads to me as a very Billy Goats gruff situation, right? And a you shall not pass the bridge type of moment. May we pass. you haven't given me a good enough reason. Another option for this not having gone the way it did is when they beamed down and like started to go around just to be cautious and it moved, just being like, you know what, fuck this.
Starting point is 00:18:55 We're leaving. Yeah. They try to explain that they're on this very important mission and life is important. And that's actually what this mission is about, by the way. Tashiyar becomes a little impatient with the having to explain the reasons for things and attempts to go right around this black pool and Armis reacts by connecting her to a jerk cable and throwing her across the set. Right across the beach,
Starting point is 00:19:24 Riker data whip out phasers and tag this thing, but that doesn't do anything. What that tells us is that Armis is more powerful than an Echo Papa. A lot more. It is brutally powerful, and Krescher has rushed to her side, and Yard has a weird, bruise-looking patch on her cheek. Ben, we've noticed so many of the ways the remastered TNG has as improved effects over the episodes and over the years. Why did they not improve the little patch on her cheek in these scenes that we get the end
Starting point is 00:20:05 of her life. I don't know what version you watched. In mine it said oof, right in the middle of it. It was like a comic book sound effect. Like a Batman thing? Yeah. She dead. We beam right back up, not direct to Six Bay,
Starting point is 00:20:23 but to the transporter room where data then picks Yars' body up and runs with her to Six Bay, where Picard arrives to watch as Crusher works to save their fallen comrade One of my favorite moments in this is when Riker looks at the screen and sees the respiration and pulse rate starts to rise.
Starting point is 00:20:44 He's like, way to go, doctor! That was close, huh? You can't speak too soon in a moment like this. And boy, does he get his comeuppance later. My goodness. This is one of the very rare double RSVPs of a single character in one episode. People say that Yars' death is abrupt and senseless. But no, it's abrupt and senseless two times.
Starting point is 00:21:12 This is a great Dr. Crusher moment because I think anytime you can see heroic effort being put into saving someone's life, I think that's a good thing. And I think so much of season one has been about Dr. Crusher disagreeing with Picard about something or I guess what I'm trying to say is I'm struggling to come up with even a near equivalent for her flexing her doctor muscle in the way that she does here. And I just think it's great to see. She is not using roots to try to fix ER. She is using all of the most advanced technology medical science has available. One of her nurses wheels in the TVVCR combo with roots on the screen. And she's like, no, not now. No. I mean, amazing and like, you know, in many
Starting point is 00:22:01 ways a historic TV series, but this is not the time. Even Jordy's like not the right time at all, guys. Yeah. It's a great moment, and I think Gates McFadden does a really great job conveying someone who is trying to like do mental math on what the next step even could be, given how little information she has about what happened to Tasha. And it's really devastating when she decides to stop the body shocks that they've been administering and say like, you know, like she was dead before we got here. Like that thing sucked the life right out of her. There's a visual language you learn through years of watching TV that goes like, if the body's flopping around when it's getting shocked, it means there's a chance. And the moment you lose hope here is when
Starting point is 00:22:55 when you stop seeing the flop. If this was a Baywatch episode, Yarr would have been saved and she would have done that thing when she'd like, and she coughs and like a whole bunch of black shit comes out of her mouth instead of seawater this time. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:23:11 But no, this is not Baywatch. This is Star Trek motherfucker. Because I've died. Meanwhile on the surface of Vagra 2, Armis has a conversation with Deanna Troy who is down but not out inside this shuttle. The shuttle pilot is down, though. Very much so.
Starting point is 00:23:27 And she can't get a call out to Enterprise because Armis has enveloped the wreckage that she's in. Armis would like to torment Troy by gloating about killing her friend. Do you want to know why I killed her? Your answer would be meaningless.
Starting point is 00:23:46 This is not news to Troy. She perceived the emotions of of Yar ceased to exist. And she is very scornful of the kind of just did it, you know, killed a man to watch him die kind of vibes that Armis is putting out. And she kind of reads them for filth here. She's like, you thought that that would feel great and that that would really turn your crank and you killed somebody that I care about a lot. And it didn't do anything for you. You did not get the
Starting point is 00:24:18 satisfaction you sought. This is a really significant Deanna Troy episode. because try to think of it from her perspective. All she's doing is hearing stuff and sensing things. She doesn't know what Armis looks like. All she can grasp is that Armis killed Tasha Yard. And yet, listen to this amount of lip she's got. You have a great need. I need nothing.
Starting point is 00:24:46 Liar. She is not a weak hostage here at all. She flips so much shit at Armis. and really like salts the wound. Like every time Armist gets something that Armist didn't want, she is there to dig deeper on that, on the pain that Armis is experiencing. And conversely, to stick up for the Starfleets
Starting point is 00:25:10 that are on the outside of this shuttle trying to negotiate her release. She's like, you are going to try to break their spirit and make them feel despair for your own amusement. and you're going to fucking fail. Speaking of being in pain, a very special McLaughlin group is happening on Enterprise in the conference room. Issue one.
Starting point is 00:25:32 Everyone is very upset about what's gone down here. But Picard tells everyone that feelings are for cattle, love play, and after the shuttle crew is rescued. You've got to get down to work here. Our feelings will have to wait. Is that understood? Try to think of your grief as being trapped in a shuttle under some rocks and you were not going to access that right now. In case anyone is wondering,
Starting point is 00:25:57 Wharf will be the new security chief. I will do my best, sir. I feel like this is a little premature. Like, you don't need to delegate this job right now, do you? Unless it's like Worf is going to start, like, punching holes and walls if I don't, like, give him something to just kind of redirect it. You know who is a real go-geta.
Starting point is 00:26:21 Leland T. Lidge, that fellow, would make a great security officer. The kind of mind that analyzes systems and improves them would be uniquely well suited to both security and tactics. The sort of loose trigger that would ram the dilithium crystals into the warp core without a checklist. He's a real shoot from the hip guy, and that's what we need on the horseshoe. Crusher is not so sure that the people are on the shuttle for that everything we do down there has been stopped there has been stopped or stymied by Armist. Like, we basically cannot get a reliable scanner reading, do a transport, or do anything without Armis's permission. Armist seems to have a great amount of power, but within a very, like, confined area.
Starting point is 00:27:37 And it just so happens that this shuttle went down within that bubble. Do you think it's intentional that no one ever talks about shooting Armis from orbit? It's the only way to be sure. With the ship's weapons. Fucking A. I mean, we see them bombard. the site from orbit later. They can bill me.
Starting point is 00:27:57 They weren't even like, hey, let's look at the hole and see if there's any goo moving around in it. You know, like they didn't, they didn't like zoom in at all. Yeah. No one cares about Armis. Armis is basically doing a hostage situation. It's got Troy and Ben, the shuttle pilot, as its hostages. And they don't really feel like there's anything they can do about it. Aside from try to talk Armis down.
Starting point is 00:28:27 So Picard agrees to another O-A team. And Riker invites Worf on it. And Worf is like, I would probably fuck around and find out on that one. So I'm going to not fuck around. I will remain on the ship. It's funny how recently I talked about the idea of opting out of a Dustbuster Club as if you had a choice. Clearly, you do. You do.
Starting point is 00:28:53 As soon as Jordy becomes attached to this thing, I got to tell you. And I'd seen this episode many times before, but like the idea of him joining just puts into your mind the idea of getting that visor covered in this goop. And what a mess that would have to be to clean. It's like flossing with braces. Oh, you said it, brother. So they beam down. And the shuttle is like enveloped in the goo. And Armis is talking to Troy.
Starting point is 00:29:23 again and he's like talking her about how he can tell that the away team are really agitated and concerned about the situation and that's really fun for him because Armis is really working through some stuff that makes it very angry about being marooned on this planet this is stuff that we learned through Troy's conversation with Armis she feels out this hole in Armis's heart and calls him on it.
Starting point is 00:29:55 Like, you're basically lonely. You have been abandoned and you wish the others would come back, but they never did. Do you think Saibok could have taken away Armis's pain? I believe that. Yeah. I kind of think that, too. But interestingly, Armis kind of has the same problem that the God figure at the center of the universe had in Star Trek 5, which is like, I really need to get out of here.
Starting point is 00:30:26 Truly does. Can I get a ride? You want me to give you transportation? For which I will trade you lives. So he oozes away, not enjoying the conversation he's having with Troy and hoping to get a little bit more action from the away team. But on the bridge, Warf and Wesley have been working a science station. and they've identified some fluctuations in the energy field that is preventing them from doing sensors or transports on the shuttle.
Starting point is 00:31:06 Worf's got that energy of someone who's been given a promotion but doesn't want to do all the extra work. Like, Worf, what are you doing at the science station? Like, we all went over that you were now chief tactical officer. why don't you face the other way on the bridge? You're not at a cubicle anymore. You have the corner office and people come to you with their problems. Yeah, he's not there yet in his head. Armus comes back to his goo guy formation.
Starting point is 00:31:34 And Riker is like, okay, like we are here to try to negotiate for the release of the hostages. What do you want? I want a new car that goes really fast and gets really shitty gas mileage. Jordy is doing some very intense, like, crouching down and looking at this thing. But he's sort of doing it like the Ferengi and encounter at Farpoint, kind of like mincing and, like, bent at the waist and, like, hiding behind his mother's apron. Yeah, and also making, like, really significant, like, holy shit looks to data and whoever else will make eye contact with him, which is like, we never find out what it was that Jordy was seeing. when he was looking at this guy. I can only imagine it was
Starting point is 00:32:20 all of the video effects dropped onto the same clip in the sequence. It's so awful looking. Picard's like, Jordy, send to me what you are seeing. And then it's just the worst visual ever. Like one of my early music videos,
Starting point is 00:32:40 basically. But it's just a jumble. Extraordinary. Crusher is four. to abase herself to Armis, to beg for permission to see Troy. And Armis was like, okay, go ahead. And she starts walking over there and then immediately changes his mind. And so instead he lets Crusher talk to Troy on the radio.
Starting point is 00:33:03 Troy's like, yeah, like as expected, I'm alive. Ben is barely, please tell this goo man to leave us alone. I love how often you're using Ben's name, a character who does not move. the entire episode, a character whose name I never even wrote down. You didn't write down, Lieutenant Ben? When you're a Ben, you notice all the other Ben's, clearly. That guy's one of my heroes, you know? He made it through this episode.
Starting point is 00:33:31 I can't say that for everybody on the Enterprise. Never forget I died doing exactly what I chose to do. Armist Toys with Jordy here, teasing him by whacking his visor off into the dirt, like a beach bro, kicking sand. Yeah, yeah. And Jordy's the 90 pound weakling. Yeah. Not nice. Not nice, Armis. And once that is over, Armis heads back to the shuttle and is annoyed that Troy was right. He's like, yeah, that kind of sucked. I was looking for more entertainment value for my dollar than I got. She really kicks him in the puddle here. Time to talk about your abandonment issues with your therapist, Arbus. You know, the haters will say Armist will do anything to the Enterprise crew but go to therapy.
Starting point is 00:34:26 But here he is. He talks about how these were like luminous beings who really like kick a lot of ass now because they got rid of him. They figured out a way to bring all that was evil and bad about themselves. up to the surface of their birdies, and it became a second skin, and then they sort of like peeled themselves like bananas and left this planet. Yeah, I don't know, Armis.
Starting point is 00:34:52 It kind of sounds like a failure of you to take responsibility for your being the problem. Kind of seems like you're the drama, Armis. Sure does. She pities him, though, for having screwed up so bad that the beings of which he, was apart, left him here. And boy, does that piss him off. That pisses him off so bad.
Starting point is 00:35:16 What do you like to do when you're upset? Hurt other people. You're saying I like to hurt other people? No, I mean, I initially asked the question as like the royal you, but yeah, I mean, specifically you, I guess. You like to drag Commander Riker into the slop, and that's what happens. A, effectively terrifying moments, especially because of it's blocking. Like, we see the pool in the background and we follow Commander Riker's horrified face as he's dragged into it. It was great then and it's great now. Brakes did this stunt and came to really regret it on set, apparently.
Starting point is 00:35:57 He just absolutely fucking hated it. And I read this thing about later when he like gets blurped back out. and he's like lying there, you know, like in between shots, he just had to lie there because if he got up, he would mess up all the dirt dripping stuff on it. And LeVar Burton apparently came over to him and was like, man, I can't believe you agreed to this. You're such an idiot. LeVar takes a picture of him for blackmail. You better not run for office, freaks. What do you think this is? Roots? The thing that must have been even more uncomfortable than trying to be still covered in whatever this goop is, is that we know this show imports dirt full of fleas.
Starting point is 00:36:46 So you're basically being tarred and feathered with fleas. If you're Jonathan Frakes here, sounds terrible. They have to pretty much completely break down the crafty table and put up a new one if you go over to that like this, right? Yeah. What a guiding principle and we start feeding face. Have you can't find it
Starting point is 00:37:07 within yourself to stand up tell the truth you don't deserve to wear that uniform. What a moment seeing what is supposed to be
Starting point is 00:37:15 Riker's face surface and then submerged before going below. Just a horrifying moment. Lovar Burton loses his phaser
Starting point is 00:37:24 in the run up to the edge. It goes down and it's like halfway into the drink back in his holster not too long
Starting point is 00:37:32 later. And I really wish they had had a shot of him like picking it up and like wiping stuff off. And why is Jordy like taking a cell phone picture of Riker's face like up on the surface before going down? Like what does he hope to achieve by having that picture? It's weird. So Armis is doubling down on this hostage situation because now he has another and he says the crew inside the shuttle and this guy that I just sucked into myself are dead meat unless you give me a ride out of here. And back on the bridge, Wharf and Wesley have worked up quite a bit more data. They have a little bit more of a track record of scanning the things that Armis is doing. And like many of these graphs, you see like Reagan elected president and then like, you know,
Starting point is 00:38:28 wealth inequality skyrocketing, you know, taxes on the super elite plummeting, all of these bad things that we still live with. Really glad the Riker character isn't here in this moment to observe the huge energy dip that happens whenever you talk to Deanna Troy. He's like, now you can, hey guys, you understand, right? Why I just couldn't stay in this? It both explains why Riker's relationship status is what it is and also. So gives a little bit of a path toward a way they might be able to get their people back. And Picard is like, well, I've seen enough.
Starting point is 00:39:13 I'm going down there to confront this thing. Wharf, you're in charge. And when he walks away, I don't know if you watched what Will Whitten did with this moment, but he looks like this captain is making a horrific mistake right now. And I might need to speak up. but then he realizes that Wharf is standing in between him and Picard and decides not to. It is like one of the most amazing bit of reacting, acting I've ever seen. Wesley Crusher is in an interesting spot because I've got to believe that he thinks with
Starting point is 00:39:48 Warf's reassignment to security, he's new science guy. He might be on the fast track. I know. And he is realizing in real time that that is not happening. No. It's got to be crushing him right now. Troy is really suffering for experiencing the feeling of whatever is happening to Riker. And Armis is really getting a lot of pleasure out of that.
Starting point is 00:40:16 I was so hoping Armis would push Rikers' oiled up body against the windshield of the shuttle. and the sound of his body squeaking against it as it slides down. We've all always wanted to see Riker put him on the glass. I think that this is a really interesting scene because the selflessness of Troy offering to Mzadi Swappin'n with Riker. Without hesitation. Head down. Zaddy. Mzadi Swapin.
Starting point is 00:40:53 totally illegible to Armis. Armis cannot imagine a selfless act, like something that you do on behalf of another like this. And she really blows his mind when she's like, and I would do it for any of them. Like anybody on the bridge crew anyways. Like maybe some of the ass wipes like lower decks, probably not, but like the main cast for sure. Do you feel like this is a feeling that is shared among the rest of the bridge crew that we know and like? Or do you feel like this is particular to her, because she's the only one that says it for maybe a very long time on this show. I mean, when I think about Jordy, when I think about Data, Riker, Warf, Crusher, I think they would. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:41:37 I think we've got a crew that would do that for each other. This is a conversation that's interrupted by Captain Picard when he beams down, and he doesn't engage with Armis at first, kind of refuses to entertain him or, have any sort of exchange with him at all. So Armus rises from his pool and puppets data in a way that is very attention-getting for everyone. He sort of puppets him into holding his dustbuster out at Picard and then Dr. Crusher and then finally himself. He's really popping and locking as he does this. And yeah, Picard is coming to this with the advantage of having a little bit of game tape on Armis and knowing what Armis is all about.
Starting point is 00:42:25 And also having formulated a strategy in his mind when he learned that when Armis talked to Troy, Armis's energy signature went down, there's a really great handheld shot that's held at like waist height as Picard steps up to the pool to start talking. So Armis, and yeah, he is not playing games. Nobody is acting like what is happening to data. is going to make them think anything worse of data, even if data is forced to kill one of them. Or himself.
Starting point is 00:43:03 Or himself. Data, having been released when Armist doesn't really get what he was hoping for out of that, observes the total lack of redeeming qualities in Armis and pronounces Armis worthy of summary destruction. Absolutely bad. Badass quote by data here. I think you should be destroyed. Like QED and Armis tries to make something out of it.
Starting point is 00:43:32 You know, he's still trying to clap back. He's like, oh yeah, like being moral or whatever. But Picard is like, all right, we're not having that conversation anymore. We're not here to amuse you. We're here to talk. And Armis kind of changes his list of demands. Like he seems to have almost forgotten about the idea. of getting transport off this planet
Starting point is 00:43:55 so that he can go find those who left him. He just wants Picard to order the crew to do things for his amusement. Entertain me. Picard has said it before, and he says it again. Not there to do that. And Armus is like, well, if you won't amuse me, maybe this oily birdie I've got Will,
Starting point is 00:44:17 and he kind of pushes Riker's body up onto the sand, and it's looking like an, oil spill bird over there where Dr. Crusher tends to him. Maybe like one of the worst things I could imagine experiencing and definitely one that I would re-experience if I was ever forced to experience all of the worst parts of my life over again. It's weird how Dr. Crusher takes a picture of him, like his face after he's on the beach, all covered in the black tar. Like, what does she do in that for? Yeah, and it's on like a Polaroid
Starting point is 00:44:52 camera and she puts the picture in a manila envelope marked compromise. Anyways, Picard does get Armist's degree to let the away team go home with their gooey casualty. And now it's just the two of them. You beam him directly into a sonic shower, right? Like there's no way he's hitting the transporter pad. How much of the goo that comes home on his. face and cake is part of Armis and does it like, do they have to like...
Starting point is 00:45:28 Shouldn't they have done that? We should have cut to the transporter pad where he's suddenly clean because of the filter. Oh shit. I love that. Yeah. That would have been great. That's a great in-camera effect that you could have done. Picard kind of strings Armas along.
Starting point is 00:45:43 He's like, you know, I don't even, I haven't even talked to the people in the shuttle. I want proof of life. I want to go in there and talk to them. and you know like he's a detective so he's in a suit and tie but like the SWAT team has to like put a helmet and a vest on him because like that's kind of like the protocol so it's kind of a weird look like the helmet and vest with the suit and tie but in he goes you remember that moment when when Mace Windew had the purple lightsaber yeah the black transporter that Armis uses I thought was so cool it's really red the way he blurps Picard into and out of the shuttle I don't feel like we ever see another black transporter again. We never do. Troy is seemingly injured, but okay. Picard's like, what about Ben, the extremely important pilot,
Starting point is 00:46:36 of whom I recall his name. Troy is like, I know my life hangs in the balance too, but if we could rescue Ben, that would be enough. You all right? Yes, but Ben is not. I kind of got the sense from the interactions that Picard had with Worf on the bridge, that he had already kind of made the connection that Troy must be talking to Armis about Armis's feelings. And that must be what the like lower energy thing must be. Because this is what you tend to do with people.
Starting point is 00:47:11 Kind of a one trick pony, which, you know, far be it for me to judge. I'm not a television writer, but. I now have scientific proof of how draining you can be to have an interaction with. When the creature is here, the field weakens. She's like, that's because I'm pissing him off. And he's like, good to know. I hope he can't hear all this. I love the subtext here being that he is honest with his feelings for her.
Starting point is 00:47:41 This makes him weak. So the lesson for us is, cover up those feelings and stay strong. Do not try to be vulnerable About anything No way I am the cutest are born Block pages are my present I am the cutest
Starting point is 00:47:56 There are four lights Picard is brought back out And has this loneliness Barb to sling over and over again And then he like doubles down By expressing compassion And boy does Armis hate that shit Yeah
Starting point is 00:48:14 I mean he makes himself the victim but as soon as someone who's not Armis gets on that same level, he does not like that one bit. Armis has really committed to being evil. Picard does not necessarily see it that way. He sees Armis as having some degree of self-determination on these things, despite everything Armis has said. Like, Armis is like, I am evil.
Starting point is 00:48:41 Like, I was the evil and they got me out and they put me here and then they left. He's trash of the Titans. And it bugged me how he didn't have an answer to the question of, where do you want to go if I were to take you anywhere? I so wanted an answer to that. Where would Armis go? Maybe he said that to Picard during the moment we spend on the bridge with Wharf and Wesley, where they set the computer to automatically transport everybody home the moment their energy readings go below a certain threshold. So basically now it's on lawyer Picard to just like treat Armis as a hostile witness and work him until he is in such a rage that everybody can get out of there. And I love that Picard points out Armis being in a weaker negotiating position than he represents.
Starting point is 00:49:35 Like Picard is like, without us, you have no opportunity to go anywhere. So you can't just kill us. Like we're not going to do anything for you if you like, you, like, you. like kill me and Troy. I mean, please don't kill Ben. But even if you kill all three of us, like if you kill all three of us, the ship will just leave,
Starting point is 00:49:54 you know, after glassing the planet, you know, order 24 in effect, they'll get out of here. Like, you don't actually have as much leverage as you think, man. I ordered a number 24 at Langers.
Starting point is 00:50:08 Fucking destroyed six city blocks when I did. Oh. Don't make that mistake. You know, you go in there with sheer fucking hubris and you come out a changed person. Yeah. Ben, I did not know Picard had this sort of game when it came to nagging. And as someone who negs so well, I cannot come close to using a word that sounds too much like a bad word for that. But he is excellent at the negging, isn't he?
Starting point is 00:50:43 He sure is. He's twisting the knife. He's salting the wound. He's doing everything to rage armis out. And this works. We get below the threshold and thank Buck. Ben is safe. Our primary concern is getting that guy whose face we never see off the controls of the shuttle and back onto the ship. I mean, Troy and Picard gets saved too and that's nice. But Ben, he's back. and we get the absolutely iconic crash zoom on Armus as he wails in displeasure. And on the bridge we just see, like, no sound effect, we just see the torpedo like falling away from the ship from orbit
Starting point is 00:51:30 and hitting the shuttle crash site. And it's described in the log as like, so that we don't even have to worry about Armis ever getting off the planet. What they don't say is he's not getting off. that planet because a torpedo hit from orbit. I don't know how surgical that strike has been. And I'm not convinced that the ship wants it to be that surgical. Armis looks really flammable, right?
Starting point is 00:52:00 I so wanted during that crash zoom into Armis, a sort of pizza the hut kind of like disassembly of him as he screams, like big, gloppy pieces coming off and dripping into the pool. On a sadder note, Pizza the Hut, famed half man, half pizza, was found dead. He's very upset. He is pretty cranky. We go to the holodeck for the funeral. How surprised were you that this was a casual affair?
Starting point is 00:52:29 No dress uniforms on anyone? I mean, that kind of tracks with Yar. Like, I feel like she's a very down at heels, you know, humble character. She's not trying to put on airs or anything. The detail of her knowing is. Exactly her manner of death is such a flex at your own funeral. Wow. It probably happened while I was on duty and quickly, which is what I expected.
Starting point is 00:52:55 This is so impressive. I never really thought that much about this speech she gives for herself before, but like there must be multiple versions of it, right? Because, and she must record them like on a somewhat regular basis, like every six months, like file another one. because she both predicts the manner of her death and also with dead accuracy, everyone who is there and nobody who is not there. Ben, I thought exactly the same thing and I craved the moment where she shared a thought
Starting point is 00:53:30 with someone who isn't there. Like everyone's looking at each other, like, who's Charlie? Yeah. She's going on and on about this guy. Commander McDuff, you are a great first officer. Somebody that we should all trust and follow, should we ever lose our memories and find ourselves on a ship that we don't recognize? I think of this moment came earlier in season one. We would savage it because the amount of telling and not showing here, especially as it relates to the captain, is something that I just don't think you can do until many, many episodes down the road.
Starting point is 00:54:11 What she says about Captain Bacard here feels credible because we've already been through it with him for 20-some episodes. I think an appropriate amount of time has passed where we can receive all of these descriptions of people and go, like, this is not, we're not just writing things about characters in order to suggest their qualities to a viewer. Like, these are them. That's such a good point. Like, the way she talks through each character as she turns to them kind of feels like resetting the show Bible. Like, we're summing up what this character represents in a couple of lines. My friend, Data, it never happened. In a way that, like, could play as really didactic, but doesn't because this is a heavy moment.
Starting point is 00:55:01 But also, like, this is a script, one of the many scripts from this season where, the rumor is that like Gene Roddenberry's lawyer rewrote everything and got way more matter of fact with Yars death than anybody in the writer's room wanted. Like it's just she's dead and we're moving on. But like I think that this scene really does a lot of heavy lifting to make the senselessness of her death feel like something that she kind of expected. Like she is about this life, and she is not sad to have gone out doing what she did. Ending on Picard is right. Ending on her suggestion that Picard not replace her with Wharf, I thought was a little bit cutting toward the end. Like maybe save that for an email that goes around later.
Starting point is 00:55:54 Like that's auto sent via Deadman switch out of your computer. It's just kind of like a bad look. to think that you get to decide who replaces you in the order of succession. Like, that's not how any of this works. Oh, Ravois, Natasha. Anyways, we end with just Picard and Data in there. And Data is kind of worried that he is a, he's feeling like he might be a little bit selfish to have had his internal monologue make this all about him.
Starting point is 00:56:31 and what a loss this will be for him personally. Data is the one that rearranged Tasha's internal log personally. Makes him an interesting character to share these thoughts. Sure does. His external log rearranged her internal log, wouldn't you say? Adam, that's really beautiful. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:56:56 This is becoming a speech. You're the captains, though. They're entitled. I'm tired to ramble on about something everyone knows. Well, that was a great episode of Star Trek The Next Generation. I have a great big question for you, Adam. Rearrange my internal log, Ben. There's some debate in the final showdown between Picard and Armis
Starting point is 00:57:20 about whether Armis is unredeemable. You know, Armis is committed to the unredeemable viewpoint, And Picard disagrees, but the episode does not answer that question. Like, everybody gets beamed away before that conversation reaches any resolution. My question is, what would you, given the technology, work out to the surface of humanity's bodies and then have us slough off like so much sludge? What aspect of the human character would you get rid of? Wow. Wow.
Starting point is 00:58:04 Wow. It's a big question. I really don't like witnessing people being inconsiderate. And when I'm out in public and I see the way people act about their own space and about how impolite they are to service industry people. and just the lack of self-awareness folks have generally. I know this is like an affliction of mine that it bothers me so. And I think if there were less of that in the world, I can't see any negative to that. If you were to Bioray, pull all of that out of people's pores and then throw those qualities into a waste paper basket and leave out of your hotel room door, like that's a positive thing.
Starting point is 00:58:55 thing, right? Boy, if you biore'd that out, it would look like a carpet sample. I know. I think that's a kind of thing, because so many answers to this question, I think, would involve removing too much. Like, you excise certain aspects to people, and all of a sudden they lose the thing that makes them them. But I think a little more consideration and a little less in consideration could go a long way in improving just about everything in our culture. I really like that. Yeah. I had to take my son to a porter potty at a public park not that long ago. And like the guy that went in right before us had clearly just pissed all over the seat that my son needed to sit on. And so the like first part of being inside the porta potty with him was cleaning up all of the piss on the seat. And I was just like,
Starting point is 00:59:49 I can't even imagine being in the headspace of leaving when it's like this. And yeah, so I think I agree. Like, I think take the part of me out that is so upset by all of that and just, I can just like practice some acceptance. Take the seat pisser aspect of people out. Yeah. Take it off. It's a real skin of evil situation.
Starting point is 01:00:14 Yeah. Dark and vile. Well, Adam, we're going to. Jump over to the Priority One inbox, and after that, I've got a game that may result in you needing to produce some content. But let's read these P-1s before we do that. Yeah, let me do this job first before I do that other job. Priority One message from Starfleet coming in on Secured Channel. You need a supplemental income.
Starting point is 01:00:43 Supplement. Supplement. Yeah, it's extra. The interest alone could be more. enough to buy this ship. Adam, this is a promotional message. It was like this. Hey, Adam, Ben. It's Eric from D.C. wishing you the best on your new solo adventure.
Starting point is 01:01:01 The FODs were so kind as to help our engineers without Borders DC chapter, bridge project in Dumong Bay Sierra Leone, the crossing kind, not the ship kind. It should be built when you get to reading this. But due to the fuel price and cruise. increases for reasons. There were many cost increases. So any amount you can give will get us across that finish line or river so we can maybe start designing a new middle school too. This is a repeat from Eric and he and we hope that you will donate at EWB-dc.org slash projects slash Sierra-Leon, or just search EWB-D-C.
Starting point is 01:01:50 And that's from Eric from D.C. Why did Eric build a bridge across a river in DeMong Bay to get to the middle school on the other side, Ben? And we can help. Hell yeah. And we can all pitch in on this one, EWB-DC.org. And look for their Sierra Leone project. Ben, we've got a personal priority one message here. It's from Katie, and it's to you and me.
Starting point is 01:02:14 Here's how that goes. Hey guys, I started listening in 2016 after the Ars article. Like you have done for so many other FODs, you have gotten me through some rough times. Most recently, after I had to put my beloved dog down. I just wanted to thank you both for the blend of nerdiness, sophomoric humor, and sincerity that we all love. Keep up the great work. Katie, Adam and I know firsthand, I mean, I think a lot of, lot of us here at X-Bridge-Shimoto know firsthand what the what the pain of that is like.
Starting point is 01:02:49 Yep. And our hearts are really with you right now to the extent that any of our silly jokes on this show can help. That is, I mean, that's not why we do this, but it's always gratifying to hear that that comes out as one of the effects. Yeah. I mean, it got us through it when those times came for us. True. All right. This one's from Chris G, and it's to Ben Adam and Adam Ragusea.
Starting point is 01:03:18 Longtime listener, first P1. It's been eight years since the Atlanta live show. My daughter was a month old, and I was alone after a coworker backed out. I sat next to a nice man getting looks from Ben and Adam. After some digging, I found out I was sitting next to Adam and never knew it. I wish I could have gotten his autograph. Keep up the good work. Any chance we can get some pins like we used to get with that other podcast network.
Starting point is 01:03:49 Also, live show tour? Chris G, we're definitely interested in another live show tour. We've just had like the busiest ass year of the entire existence of this podcast. So it's not planned yet, but it's definitely on our agenda to start thinking about and seeing if we can get the math to pencil out. Yeah, living in Atlanta, I'll say you have some of the best chances of seeing another live show. Indeed. Man, wild to think about that being eight years ago, though.
Starting point is 01:04:22 Yeah. You remember our pal Chuck Bryant was there, taking pictures? I do remember that, yeah. Regusia was there? Gusea was there. Great stuff. I love the mental image of sitting next to Adam Reguccia. My mental image is that show was not a sellout, and if you didn't want to sit next to a stranger, you didn't have to.
Starting point is 01:04:41 so yeah well wasn't this i feel like this was the at the earl and not at that at that brewery oh yeah i mean it was eight years ago because we've done several several shows in atlanta yeah yeah well great memories and uh god bless everyone who comes to a greatest gen live show and god bless everyone who gets at p1 we really appreciate it you head to podshop.biz and look for the priority one messages link right at the top of the page get yours today Okay, Adam, we've had an episode. We've had a big question. Now we have a game.
Starting point is 01:05:17 We can all agree that the cast and crew absolutely cooked with this episode of Star Trek The Next Generation. And to that end, your challenge today will be to determine if you have to cook or mix. Up to you. We're playing a game called Recipe of Heifle. Hmm. And this will be a simple, four-question trivia game.
Starting point is 01:05:44 If you manage to get the majority of the questions correct, you don't have to do anything. But if you are stumped and get half or less, you need to come up with a recipe for something that looks like Armis, either a drink or a food, and make a video about how to make it for social media. Can I ask if it needs to be as thick as Armis or if it can just look like Armus?
Starting point is 01:06:11 Movement is not part of the message here. It can be a solid or it can be a liquid. But this is about how Armis was made, the recipe for Armis. And what are the elements of that recipe? What went into creating this creature effect? Question one, meant to look like an oil slick. Armis is actually a water-based concoction of printer ink
Starting point is 01:06:38 and what? A. Tapioca starch. B. Metamusal. C. Cornstarch. D. Cherry, jello gelatin. I am a big fan of cornstarch as a thickener for sauces. I think if you spend much time in a kitchen, you will rely on it to thicken what you're cooking. That was not what was used here. Famously, this was metamusel and printer egg. That is correct, Adam. It is metamusel and printer ink. One point on the board. Which makes me think that maybe when I go to thicken a sauce, I should consider metamusal more often. You should, you know? That is what it does. It literally like polymerizes your poops to make them both softer and firmer. Could use a little bit more of both of those in my life at my advanced age. well, I'm here to tell you as one of the co-hosts of a men's health podcast. I did a lot of metamusal research today.
Starting point is 01:07:43 And everything I've read leads me to believe I should just have so much of it all the time. I recently learned from a friend that she was taking five capsules of Sillium Husk four times a day. And it's made her feel incredible. And I'm like, I may be a convert to the high. amount of Sillium Husk lifestyle. You got those headed to the house right now? You place an order? I have a new rule.
Starting point is 01:08:13 I never buy anything from my phone. I do not use the purchasing stuff on my telephone. But maybe after this. Got to break that rule in this case. Yeah. For health stuff. Yeah. Question two.
Starting point is 01:08:25 Printer ink add up to $12,000 per gallon. It's often cited as one of the most expensive liquids on the planet. But it isn't the most expensive liquids on the planet. But it isn't the most expensive. Which of these four liquids costs more than 3,000 times more per gallon on today's market? A. Human blood. B.
Starting point is 01:08:49 Chanel number five. C. King Cobra venom. D. Scorpion venom. Two venoms. A perfume. And blurred.
Starting point is 01:09:02 Blurred. I think this says so much about our success. I think blood has very little value. I'm going to strike that from the list. Okay. And I also kind of feel like the perfume aspect pretty expensive. I just recently bought some perfume for my wife. And that was a little bit of a nut. And if it was Chanel number five in like a milk jug, like that's what we're picturing here. Here's the thing. Cobra feel like makes a lot more venom than a scorpion who's just a little guy. And what do we know about equivalent values of things and scarcity?
Starting point is 01:09:38 Sure. Seems like the scorpion venom would be the most scarce. Yeah? But there are a lot of scorpions around, and there are a lot of rattlesnakes around. Like, how much Chanel number five can there be in the world? How much human blood can there be in the world? You know, there's so many different directions you could take this. I'm going to say scorpion venom is the most valuable liquid of all four.
Starting point is 01:10:01 You are correct, Adam. stunning bit of deductive reasoning. Human blood. Almost worthless. Yeah, it is worth $1,500 per gallon. Chanel number five, $26,000 per gallon. King Cobra Venom clocking in at $153,000 per gallon. Okay.
Starting point is 01:10:23 Scorpion Venom, $39 million a gallon. We got to give up on the whole corner elevator vending machine thing. Let's get into scorpion milking. What if the corner vending machine had Scorpion Venom for sale in it? Like, the margin on that has got to be crazy, right? No one's going to be able to afford that. That's true. We control the market at that point, too.
Starting point is 01:10:47 We can't just sell it in vending machines. Here's how we do it. This is simplifies everything because we don't have to open a million accounts, right? We're not trying to, like, get into every Weston in Philadelphia with our corner vending machine. We have one customer. it's the Birch Khalifa. It's Scorpion Venom bending machine
Starting point is 01:11:07 and it only exists in the corners of those elevators in that building. A building full of people who can afford it, you know? You open up your phone
Starting point is 01:11:17 buy a bunch of cillium husk. I will open up mine buy a bunch of scorpions by next week. We're going to be rich and shit and thick. They must have spent so much money on ink though,
Starting point is 01:11:30 right? Like if it's $12,000, I mean, I feel like that's like printer ink in printer cartridge, so it's like more expensive than ink. But like it must have cost a lot of money to make that bat of Armis, right? I also feel like the ink can dilute a water mixed with metamusal suspension. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:11:50 In such a way that I think a little goes a long way. Okay, Adam, well, those were the physical ingredients of Armis. Let's talk about the people that went into making Armis. Got an actor. and a voice actor. We'll start with the actor. Question three, Mart McChesney,
Starting point is 01:12:11 played another notable non-humanoid in Star Trek. Which one was it? A, the shelliac, the perplexing species trying to claim ownership over the planet that Goshaven leads in Ensigns of Command.
Starting point is 01:12:25 Of course. B, the voice of the Herada, the insect species, with fanatical devotion to protocol. See the Laplaine, the last surviving member of her species, who is also being kept against her will in Kivas Vagio's collection. Or D, the puppeteering of the exocop. Oh, like, he wasn't a voice actor for that. He just, he just perpetrated the exocop around.
Starting point is 01:12:57 This is the person in the thing that rises out of the ooze, so. The voice of the Shelley Act actually haunts my dreams. I can remember what it sounds like, and it sounds so much like Armist to me in my mind. But this is not the voice actor. The voice actor is next. We'll talk about him next. Oh, shoot. So what am I saying again?
Starting point is 01:13:19 This is the physical performer. Oh. I mean, I've got to go with my instinct there. Let's just go with the Shelleyack answer. You've done an astonishingly good job with this quiz. You are correct. Mark McChesney has two credits on TNG, Armas and the Shelleyac. Amazing. What the fuck. Okay.
Starting point is 01:13:42 I'm so annoyed. I wanted a recipe video so bad. Do you want to just like for fun here at this last question? Sure. Because I wrote it. It's been a while since I've made a pan of brownies too. Maybe I'll do that before the next episode. Well, you don't have to. Ron Gans, who did the voice of Armas. also did a voice for the failed pilot Pride of the X-Men
Starting point is 01:14:05 which served as the basis for Konami's X-Men side-scroller one of my favorite arcade games of all time which X-Man villain did he give voice to in that pilot A, Magneto B, the blob C, juggernaut, D, Piro
Starting point is 01:14:24 I'm gonna say Juggernaut. You're fucking right. God damn it, you fucking swept the board. That would have been my guess even if you didn't give me possible answers. That's just a character in that side scroller I remember utterly. What a great video game that was. It fucking ruled. I was sure you were going to pick the blob because nothing moves the blob.
Starting point is 01:14:44 And he's like kind of got the same attitude as Armis. He matches Armis's freak and that first level of that great video game. We both talked a bunch to Rob Adler about buying pinball machines and just what a great investment it is, but God, if you were ever to buy a video game cabinet, I feel like X-Men's got to be on your list. Such a classic. So good. I don't think it's any kind of overestimate. I've definitely put at least $100 in quarters into those machines over the course of my life. Yeah. Great game. Great game by you. Great game by Konami. I need to write harder trivia questions, I guess. Those questions were hard. I got lucky on two of them. Yeah. Well, we
Starting point is 01:15:29 Got to get out of here. But we'll be back next week. And to hear more about what is up ahead, listen to these credits. Bye, bye. The Greatest Generation is an Uxbridge, Shimoda podcast. It's hosted by Ben Harrison and Adam Pranica, and it's produced and edited by Wendy Pretty. Next week, we'll be back with another episode of Star Trek The Next Generation,
Starting point is 01:15:54 so strap in for some time loops because it's season one, episode 24. We'll always have... Paris. Until then, we want to thank all of the members who support this show. If you want to join them, you'll get an ad-free feed, plus a lot of bonus episodes and other benefits. Sign up at greatesttrek.com. You can also just click the support link in the show notes right there in your podcatcher, and thank you for your support. Music for the greatest generation is by dark materia. Social media is managed by Bill Tilly and Rob Adler. Rob also puts together the greatest newsletter every month. Visit podshop.com.Biz to get signed up for that. You can also book a P1 there and find yourself
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Starting point is 01:16:52 We'll see you next week on The Greatest Generation.

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