The Greatest Generation - The Ascent of Beeping Chair (TNG S1E16)

Episode Date: August 10, 2026

When a dusty old Admiral is rushed to Mordan IV to negotiate a hostage release, it’s revealed he was into trading arms for hostages before it went mainstream. But when he reveals he has access to truly spectacular drugs, it’s a race against the clock to Benjamin Button up the plot. Is it possible to look older than Admiral McCoy? Who do you go to if mom and dad say no? How can Adam and Ben get out of Star Trek podcasting? It’s the episode that takes the hero dose.Support the production of our shows Members get benefits including bonus episodes and an ad-free experienceSign up for our mailing list!Get a thing at podshop.biz!The Greatest Generation is hosted by Adam Pranica and Benjamin Ahr Harrison The show is produced by Wynde PriddySocial media is managed by Rob Adler and Bill TilleyMusic by Adam Ragusea & Dark MateriaDiscuss the show using the hashtag #GreatestGen and find us on social media:YouTube | Instagram | BlueskyAnd check out these online communities run by FODs: Reddit | USS Hood Discord | Facebook group | Wikia | FriendsOfDeSoto.socialSupport the production of The Greatest Generation Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Want to hear an ad-free version of this show? Go to greatest.supercast.com. Here's to the finest crew in Starfleet. Engage. Welcome to the greatest generation, the next generation. It's a Star Trek podcast by a couple of guys, just a little bit embarrassed about having a Star Trek podcast. I'm Adam Pranica.

I'm Ben Harrison. Ben, what's going on with you? Hmm. Everything okay? What's the latest? on Ben Harrison. Oh, like what bad things have been happening? That's something that you said. Oh, okay. My question was totally neutral. I feel like I started the week feeling kind of shitty because it has been like a really, really, really, really busy first half of the year for us. And that was largely

because we kind of made the decision to go independent in a last minute way, a way that we wouldn't have chosen for ourselves, but it was kind of the way it went. And it has been a long time since that switch got flipped, and it had been a little bit unclear to us, like, the extent to which it was anything on the spectrum between disaster and triumph. And I kind of walked into this week feeling like, what if it was like catastrophic? But we've had a couple of sit downs with the people that know how to read spreadsheets. and the people that know how to read spreadsheets have have calmed my nerves and the feeling of of like taking a bra off at the end of a long day that some people describe is kind of what I would endeavor to compare it to, though I, you know, I don't know exactly what that feels like I can imagine it. And that might be something like this. Mm-hmm.

You know? Nice. So you're describing a week that started bad, but it's now pretty good? It's not pretty good. And we're recording this on a Thursday. I got tickets to a movie tonight with a buddy. You're going to go see The Odyssey? I'm going to go see The Odyssey.

That's great. Vivid 70-millimeter format. I'm going to go see that tomorrow. Right. Are you going out to the director's theater in Westwood? I don't believe I am going to Westwood. You got to refer to a specific L.A. theater. Our audience loves this.

I really do. Yeah. Let's say for the sake of argument, we're going to the AMC Burbank, and I'll let you guess which one of the three AMC Burbank's I'm talking about. Hey, that's great. I am excited to see that movie. I really am, too. I did attempt to reread a little bit of it to refamiliarize. Oh, God, really?

Nerd! My buddy who I'm going with is a very successful high-end podcast producer, and he did that and told me that he did that. And I was like, fuck, I'm going to seem like a fucking idiot if I, like, walk out of that. And he's like, well, I thought the third act kind of elided some of the more interesting, blah, blah, blah. I tell you what, when you use the word alighted in, in like, friendly company, like you're not trying to impress someone. academically? I don't know, man. I don't like the jerk move that feels like at you. That's a personal attack at me, though. I know. Because I totally would use the word alighted

in polite company. I've had it used against me by you. I'm very sensitive to that kind of thing. God, I'm an asshole. My week is starting to crumble around me. Oh, no. Let's see if we can't turn back time a little bit, Ben, and get you a bit. back into a good headspace, a young headspace, a sweatier headspace on this one of the hottest days of the year in LA. It is Star Trek the next generation, season one, episode 16, to short a season. The first beauty of every Starbeat officer into the truth or personal truth. You know, some other Greek myths I could have read, or what is Persephone? What's that about? And why the significance of it so much so that they named a planetary system after it?

I am going back in time to a memory of, I'm going to say early middle school. So this would be like seventh grade. Okay. And you're doing your reading, your Greek mythology, coursework. The classics are so important. I know. And you're just dipping into this because what do you know? You're a stupid middle schooler.

and the moment you say the word Persephone when you're asked to read in front of the class that's just a bad moment and that's a moment that never leaves you right? The Greek words are really tough I can remember a moment where a girl read something out loud in class

and the word aspirate was in there and she pronounced it Aspirate and everybody in class like somehow agreed to just let that slide and not do anything. Like there was some phenomenon took over a class full of 20 students and a teacher and nobody said anything.

That's a life-changing moment for her that should have directed her into comedy forever. It should have hit so hard that she would be chasing that laugh dragon for the rest of her life. I mean, it's certainly what happened to me when I accidentally pronounced it the Flasheron build. But yeah.

Anyways, they got to talk to this Admiral Mark Jameson because of an extraordinary situation. Picard gets on the phone with him and Jameson's like, what's this all about? And Picard's like, okay, let me see if I can share my screen. And he's like looking around the viewer, like trying to find the button. And he finally gets it. And Jameson's like, I'm looking at your email inbox. This is what is this? And he's like, oh, I'm sorry.

I selected the wrong window. Hold on. Hold on. And then we get to see this video. And it is a governor named Carnus saying that some Federation embassy staff and the ambassador have been taken hostage by terrorists. You know, in keeping with the theme, we could just call them Carnass. Yeah, sure. What do you think of that?

Yeah, yeah. I mean, that's sort of the theme of, you know, anytime they go to like an auto racing event in the Fast and Furious movies, it's Carnass. It is. It is truly, I don't know about you, Ben, but like when I was told in this episode, I'd be watching a hostage video with Jameson and Picard. This is not the kind I was thinking of ahead of time. I was thinking I would see a person wearing a hood and like a guy with maybe, you know, a cigarette lighter in one hand and a gas can in the other or something. Maybe a copy of today's paper could be in there. But no, Carnass is the guy describing the hostage taker and the kidnappers and the whole situation about this Federation ambassador that was one of the taken. This is like the primary hostage that they're trying to get back. I love all of the little insert shots of data reacting to all of these things. For some reason, the camera keeps finding him and they keep cutting to data just being like, what is up with this dude? What is up with this dude is that once you play Yvonne Drago's trainer in Rocky 4,

that is who you are forever. Anytime you are encountered and Michael Pataki is, I mean, sadly typecast as just that kind of guy. I thought he would have a Russian accent here, and I was projecting one onto him. It makes a man, a bitter man. The terrorists insist on a federation negotiator and carnage. ass just knows that Jameson is the right man for the job. We got to get him there or the hostages are as good as dead. This guy is the best in the business. Who's the guy on the face time that they're talking to that claims to be Admiral Jameson? Because that can't be who we're talking about, right?

Jameson's like, well, I'll be there at three o'clock and I'm bringing my wife. You just know this guy is going to say, okay, bye, and forget to hit the end call thing. And you see him kind of like wheel out of frame. And you hear him like very off mic like, honey, uh, get a, you know,

pack a bag for you and me for like, maybe a three, four day trip. Don't forget my pills. You forgot them last time. And like the one in the really strange, elaborate bottle that's just two pills, get that one too.

This fucking guy. This is who we're going to be stuck with for a lot of this episode. When they cut the call, they hang up, not him. They're like, it's almost three now, so we should probably go meet him. I was shocked. I was like, this guy is old. He must, like, I thought he was saying, I'll meet you at 1,500 because he needs a couple

hours to get everything ready. Like, when you travel in a quasi, in something that is approaching beeping chair, you must have so much kit that you need to bring along with you. There is a sequence of chairs. on the way to eventual beeping chair. And this has got to be, I don't think this is your first chair. Right. This is an intermediate chair for sure.

But this is like one of those things where when you look at the sequence of chairs, you're like, evolution does show some promising signs because we can see the ascent of beeping chair when we look at the missing links between them. You're really right about how unusual. it is that he proposes a time that's like 15 minutes after they talk. Because, like, to be serious for a second, this is an old man that needs a lot of medical care and attention. And I just don't expect any sort of plan to not require an hour of prep. Yeah. Who knows, man. Like, I was also surprised to learn that 85 is what this is. This is a rough 85.

Wasn't Bones supposed to be like well past 100 in Encounter at Farpoint? Jameson looks older than Admiral McCoy, and it's not even close. Carl's a lot. They beam up him and his wife. And because there is not an ADA compliant ramp to get down from the transporter pad, he just sits up there while he has a conversation at a distance with Picard and Riker. He says, here's the thing about me. Whenever I go anywhere, it is Starfleet standing directive that I'm in charge, no matter what.

That's just the way they want it. You good? If you're Picard, you have to double check this, right? Because I think that's the look on Riker's face in this scene is like, he does that thing where he's like standing in detention and he's looking out of the corner of his eyes at Picard being like, he's going to double check this, right? He has to. And Picard's like, I don't double check orders like that. I take them at face value. And it is agreed that Picard will run the ship while Jameson will run mission ops

and everything having to do with an away team should there need to be one. There's a pregnant pause. Picard says, yes, sir, and we go to theme. And when we get back, Carnus has Facetimed. And he's like, what about the Admiral Jameson guy I asked for? Is he on board? And doesn't even recognize this old man that's sitting there on the bridge. He's here besides my first officer.

You wish to speak to him now. I love how he starts right in with how bad he looks. Which to me, threw me off the sense of Carnass hating Jameson. Because if I'm an old man and I've got another old man that I know and like or whatever, I'm going to start it on that too. Like, brother, look at us. Whoa. You know?

We really both look road hard and put away wet. And imagine being on another adventure together after 40 years. They beam James into the bridge, right? Like, there's no way he attempts to drive his chair off of the transporter pad. There are a couple of times in Star Trek the next generation where they're like pushing something around on a thing that, floats a little bit off the ground. And I feel like it is implied that that's what this chair does, but it just floats at like the millimetric level.

Like it is just off the surface of the ground. But they did not do anything to attempt to sell that illusion. It's almost always static. I also thought that, you know, speaking of illusions that don't hang together that well, the idea that Carnus is this like even-harmes, is this like even-handed leader that is the one that finally brought peace to his planet doesn't feel super plausible to me because he feels really panicky and dramatic for being a person who has an incredibly long tenure as a political leader. Capable diplomats don't often

have displays of weapons on the wall behind their desk, you know? And that's what Carnus has got from jump. He's got weapons behind him and birds arranged in the shot looking toward him. Just to either side of the camera, there's some stone birds looking at him. I loved seeing the reverse shot of this at the end of the episode and seeing the birds face the other way when we're on this side of the desk. But no screen there for him to look at. Yeah. Confusing. It is. I would, if I was carnis, like, you know, I'm not an interior decorator or anything, but I'd make those birds face the camera, you know? Like, that's just going to really underline a lot of your threats when there's a mean-looking

bird on either side of you looking at the same person you are. Carnus tells them that the hostage demands are that Jameson go at this one alone, and the negotiations are going to take place right here on Morton. and Jameson does not negotiate these terms. He accepts them right away. He's fine with this. It feels so weird to everyone else on the bridge. Riker's like,

uh, so like what's up with him not seeming to know any further information about the terrorists or what they want or what's going on? They kind of look to Jameson for a reaction that they actually get from emotional bloodhound, Deanna Troy. I know what you're thinking, and I'm just dog in the whole ring. Who says that Carnus is mostly honest with what he's saying, but maybe holding something back,

so he's not being completely forthright with what he knows. And Jameson just shrugs it off, like, a man of his age, I feel like, is mostly striking off most things physically. I did feel like he was kind of running cover for Carnus in a weird way, though. Like, oh, yeah, like, I mean, he might just not have that information and be a little embarrassed about that and a little embarrassed about how the political power he's amassed around himself doesn't help him out of this particular bind. If you're writing

this episode backwards, which I feel like the writer probably was, it's on backwards. This is terrible. Do something. The idea that Jameson would make every decision in order to arrive at a point where he's placed proximate to Carnus in order to either give himself up or kill him or undo the terrible thing that he did 45 years ago. All of these actions should be suspicious now, but they're just not for some reason. Yeah. Why did somebody tell me my ass was so big? Not to Jameson anyway. What is suspicious to him is why Dr. Crusher wants him to come down to Six Bay.

Picard is like, this is just like a part of the procedure when you come aboard a start. ship, I'm kind of surprised you don't know that. And Jameson looks like he realizes he just put a bad check in the mail. Like, ugh, fuck. Are you surprised that this is standard operating procedure? We're at episode 15 and has anyone else been subject to a medical scan upon beaming onto the ship? I'm just presuming that that's happening off screen, you know? It's like, it's not, it doesn't.

it doesn't create tension in a scene so you don't pepper it in. He should know what standard operating procedures are, though. He really should. That's the kind of mental lapse an 85-year-old might have. Right. In the ready room, Riker is like, why would Carnus even ask for him? Like, on what basis would Carnus even think Jameson might still be a line?

Oh, my God. This guy sucks. This is going to be so funny. And because Jameson is there, Riker kind of lowers his voice, figuring that Jameson wouldn't be able to hear him. He's like, he really thinks this guy's the right person for this job? It doesn't make any sense. Use your head, Picard. They talk about how the demand, like they're trying to speculate on the demands.

And they're like, this must be an arms for hostages thing. It's the 80s. Like that's what it probably would be, right? Yeah. And Jameson is like, yeah, I mean, this is. This is kind of what the people on this planet tend to want is more guns. Come to think of it, they shouldn't call it Morden for, they should call it more guns for. Karnas is just looking weak and shitty because he couldn't keep the embassy staff safe.

And so he is scrambling in this moment. The only suspicious part at this point is that Karnas knows so much slash so little about James. at this point. And Jameson defends this by saying, yeah, I mean, whenever you get a job on Mordaan, most people want to talk to me first, given that I've got so much experience there. And the dude who was kidnapped, this Ambassador Hawkins guy, he and I had a conversation before he went to work there. And that's how this information might have gotten to Carnus. Do you think that one of the directors of everything, everywhere all at once, was inspired to meet the other director by the name of this planet? More Dan. I like the sound of that. And the wife of Admiral Jameson is in their quarters, pushing buttons to close drawers because pushing drawers is too difficult.

And he comes in and they have a little chat about the kind of invigorating feeling he is having from being on a mission. He's like, I just love being on starships. This is fucking great. And, you know, he's, he's, he's going to get out of the quasi-beeping chair and into something a little more comfortable. And she's like, oh, let me, let me help you. And he's like, I got it. And you talk about like the placebo effect and maybe that's what this is, just like the good vibes of being on a starship.

He can get out of the chair himself. Feels good to be on one again. I'm glad more. You need to know and like Anne as soon as possible. Like, this can't just be an Admiral Jameson story because, like, absent the person who loves him, I don't really feel like it's possible to care about Jameson or his decision. But, like, Anne is, like, so performatively loving towards him and so innocent that I think her character really does a lot to make us feel anything at all about him. I agree.

I wish they had made her seem a little less naive because, like, this chest pain moment. moment, I mean, it should just be like, we got to get the EMTs here. Like, that looks like a heart attack. And even if it's not, like, let's be out of an abundance of caution getting a really close look at what's going on to cause it. And he's like, no, no, nothing to worry about. And she's like, oh, okay. Yeah, I was blown away that like crippling chest pains that take you to the ground, not sufficient for a call to Six Bay, given that this is so much less effort than calling an ambulance or anything. You're on a starship. It would take nothing for someone to respond to this. Speaking of the medical staff on board, Dr. Crusher has a conversation with Picard, and she's like,

yeah, it's just so weird. He, like, came up here, gave me his medical records so that I could compare my scans to the most recent ones. And they're like, oh, Look at him. Too old. The card's like, well, the elderly often confuse things like days, months, and years. So maybe it has something to do with Iverson's disease. And Beverly's like, Iverson's disease is a thing that is an affliction for your body. His mind should be working just fine.

He should be figuring out dates, Captain. Iversons is like a horrible disease that makes it look like you're covered in Plato, but it doesn't, you know, your sharp as attack in spite of being covered in Plato. Holy crap. Look at this guy. Imagine if this guy came up to you. Picard does this thing that feels very familiar to anyone who is in a relationship that is grounded in, you know, more than friendship. He accidentally insults her by dismissing this take that she's got. Because Beverly Crusher's like, I'm a little suspicious about this. And Picard is like, oh, really?

You know, we actually have a crew person who specializes in minds and intentions and so forth. Maybe we should ask her. And Beverly looks like he slapped her in the face with this. And he knows it immediately that he fucks up. He's like, maybe you should join us on the bridge so you can keep an eye on him from here. You will respond to my questions. I am La Coutis aboard. You are bored. The next morning, Picard tells Jamison that they're going to go through like an interesting star system and he's like, do you want to sit at the cotton for that? And Jameson's like, yeah,

you know what? I think I do. And he does that Pearl Harbor moment where FTR gets out of the chair just to really make a dramatic scene of it all. thinking he tiny tims it instead of like the real tiny timmy like he gets up out of the chair and he's like using crutches and then he throws the crutches away like he double tiny tombs there's too much fucking shit on me i can't breathe everyone's blown away by this this is like seeing a miracle yeah cannot believe jameson made it all the way down to jordy's bridge station and fucking jordy is made to get up out of his con and give his seat to the this old guy, and then just stand behind him to watch him work.

They talk about how this was something that he hasn't done since he was on the Gettysburg. You know, if you had to email me in those days, it would be M. Jamison at Gettysburg.U.F.P. That was my Gettysburg address. Oh, the old guy's coming with old jokes, too. Great. Love it. The prank is that there is a real guy. in here. That's the, that's the new prank. Cushler is like, this doesn't hang together, man.

Like, nobody has a therapy for Iverson's disease. You just get it and it sucks and then you die. Are they trying to make a joke about an old man driving a car? Because he's so excited to drive the starship. Jordy is there. Like, he's on a sidewalk

watching an old man parallel park in El Dorado. Like, something's going to happen here. I just made my last payment. Ooh. They're so fucking glad that they weren't in Starbase when they gave him the con. Like, oh, no, no, no. Like, he's the kind of person that doesn't look at the mirrors when he's backing up because it strains his neck.

This mystery, something a human can't resist. Yeah. It's something Picard would like Beverly to look into. Like, see if you can figure out what possibly could explain the fact that Jameson could not get out of his wheelchair yesterday and can today. The three-scene sequence is very funny, the more you think about it. Just the whole Beverly thinking, something's weird about Jameson. We see something crazy with Jameson. And then in the aftermath, in the very same ready room, the card's like, I see what you're talking about.

Like, was that like right after that? Yeah. Like, should we like duck in there and just have a quick huddle? In Jameson's quarters, he's watching that original Carnass video. from the cold open when Anne comes in. And when he stands up to greet her, it is very surprising. Do not tell me.

It can't be done. Maybe not as surprising as what he wants to show her in the bedroom after. What do you think of this boner I got? She doesn't want any of that. She is straight up confused about how much better with a question mark he looks. from the earlier scene. This is what you have to get on the level of of this episode, is that as Jameson goes through these changes,

as he gets younger, that these are actually improvements. He looks like, she's like, you look 20 years younger and stung by like every hornet in the nest. You look like pre-cuffin McCulley Culkin and my girl. The bee stings just don't go down after you're dead. They're there to stay. I told not.

tease those bees. Admiral Javison, like McCauley Calkin, does not know the cartoon character trick of jumping in a lake. Yeah. No. How about Anne fighting off her husband's advances here. Yeeks. He is so horny. Yeah. He wants to get into that bedroom, but more chest pain overcomes him. And this time, he is too taken by it, so he can't stop her from summoning that. the EMTs. I like Anne's instinct here to be like, I don't know if you see yourself. Let's like, come to the mirror with me. It's not working. I need to go older. Older. You mean like Shelley Winter's older or Shirley McLean older. You've lost five pounds of face. We are definitely calling an ambulance from here. I know it's probably really hard to walk when your pants are

strained by a boner that hard. Yeah. Have you had that for four hours or longer? Maybe that was the problem. You know, boner. do, cut it up? We also learned that the problem is some strange chemicals that Crusher found coursing through his system and nowhere else. She's like, I found them here and then I went and looked them up and I cannot find any record of anything like this in the texts. And they're doing stuff like you wouldn't believe. His whole body is changing at the cellular level. There's more drugs than Iverson's disease in it.

Which is to say there is no trace of Iverson's disease at all. It's amazing. Yeah. He even looks younger and I love that Picard does not get to see what she means by this until later. I think it is also very conspicuous how Picard is not interested in that way

of male competition or curiosity in that like how much you bench kind of way? Like, he's seeing an old man beating a disease that old men get, and he appears to be getting well or more vibrant or whatever, but nothing about Picard's reaction to this scene is like, I wonder what he's taking. Yeah. And if there is more. Since this is such a serious case of old, we'll have to try our strongest treatment. And admirably not focused on what Jameson looks like in the next scene, because he like goes to the quarters and thinks it's just Ann there. And he's like,

yeah, I'm like kind of feeling like there's some stuff that we need to find out from you guys. And when Jameson reveals himself, Picard says nothing. He doesn't say like, oh my goodness, what happened to all of the silly putty? It's actually a great and sincere lesson to anyone who has a sick person in your life that maybe you haven't seen in a while or an aging relative that you haven't. You have got to lock down your reaction and be fucking smooth as hell when that is revealed to you. And this is what Picard does here. He just wants answers about what's going on. And the one challenge that I think is like the hardest about playing somebody that's aging in reverse is like,

how do you step down what you're doing to your voice to seem less old? Because I can do this and sound a little bit like an old man. but it sounds like a middle-aged man doing an old man, you know? That was awesome. Yeah. Woo! I feel like he kept really, really old Jameson voice for this face. Let me ask you a question about that.

Do you think, like, when you age, your voice is maybe one of the first things that turns old and that it's fairly consistent from there? Or do you feel like old voice is a thing that gets older and older? I think we have a very interesting body of evidence to the effect that it's kind of a number line that just drops at a fairly steady rate over time. He talks in that arch actor voice, like, I am acting. There's 80s acting, which everyone else on the show is doing to some varying degree of success. And there's Marsha Hunt's golden era, like sort of inflection acting. happening. It's a weird stew.

We're living proof of how damaging this life has been. And it's relation to our age. So he describes this planet Cerebrus 2 and their body rejuvenation process and they just kind of owed him a favor. They

usually don't give their body rejuvenation pill to aliens but he cashed in that IOU and on that day sort of ceased to be Mark Jameson and became Mark Button. I don't know how it's possible, but you seem to have more. If I'm Picard, I think this is the moment I step off the train here,

because when you're a diplomat, it asks for and is paid in pills for his work, I think you've got to reevaluate who you have attached to this mission. He turns and goes, don't worry, Annie, I got you some too. and she is pretty shocked by this revelation. This is her finding out about it also. And he then gets up and just starts ranting about how, yeah, I knew this mission was so important. This couldn't be the Michael Jordan flu game.

It had to be a Michael Jordan not flu game. So I took it all. Originally, he was going to give a dose to he and his wife, but he took her dose to, knowing that she wouldn't want it anyway. She does not have a line in this moment, but I think this actress did such an amazing job, just face acting,

the performance of learning that her husband did something like profoundly stupid, worrying about his safety, and also being like a tiny bit disappointed that she didn't get her reverse aging pill, that she just found out existed 30 seconds ago. The moral or the lesson or whatever this episode is trying to present. Gets pretty didactic here when Picard asks why he would do it. Why would he take these drugs that make you feel young and better?

Why would anyone do that? The why is obvious, though, right? Drugs can make you feel good. You don't even need to ask the question, right? Yeah, I mean, I think being younger and fitter is a thing that feels like its own motivation and it shouldn't necessarily be linked to the mission

in either of their minds. Right. But the like accelerated overdosedness of what he did like I like that the episode never really resolves whether he died because a lot of people that take this treatment die

or because he took too much, you know? I mean if I had to bet and I am a betting man I think it's the hero dose that killed him Yeah, yeah. Not that you ever go to Cerberus doing diplomat for pills in a mission and expect the right dosage to be given. I think you're just given a baggie, right? There's this conversation that I think happens from time to time in married couples of like,

why did you spend a lot of money on a thing and not talk to me about it that Anne and Javison have here? I think some couples hide personal medical information from each other. And I think this is an example of that. Like, I think we've heard from time to time people like not disclosing a terrible diagnosis to even their closest people because of their reasons. And this seems like an example of that. Not that this is any worse than a Iverson's disease diagnosis, but like the dangers of what he's doing seems related to that idea. And then you just upended the bottle, whatever it was. Damn everything. I think it's also, and I don't know if the episode is making a commentary on this or not, like an unfortunate normative dynamic in heterosexual couples, especially where the dude is like in charge, like knows things about what their financial situation is or what, you know,

like big things that have implications for both of them that he does not share with his partner. And yeah, bad deal for Annie. She is like really, really dismayed by this revel. and he's like, but I think I could get more. And I also really like that she never says anything about whether she would like him to do that or not. This feels like one of those S&L sketches that doesn't know how to end itself. I watched the scene a couple of times because at the end of it, Mark Jameson, like, grabs her wife's arms and, like, gives her good shaking, like, trying to do his best to explain the reasons he did what he did. We can be together again.

Let me go. He lets her go. She runs into the bedroom and the quarters, and then he just runs into the corridor. What if TNG scenes just ended with both characters running out of them? If you didn't know how to tie it off, just run. What are you talking about? Tracy!

He is in the darkened observation lounge and radio's data and says, hey, put in a call to Carnus. I got to talk to that guy. And everybody on the bridge is like, What do you do? You're just going to data for that? Like, what are you talking about? Isn't Worf the communications officer sort of most of the time?

Data is the ultimate if mom says no, ask dad. If dad says no, ask data. He's so neutral about everything and so by the book that if you ask him to do most things, he just would. Right. Because he's not connected to any of the drama. Picard pauses the action and is like, hey, we have been talking a lot about this Guy Carnus being a prickly guy who is maybe feeling a bit ashamed of the situation that his planet is in right now and won't needling him about that maybe make the situation worse. And Jameson's like,

well, I still have to talk to him. Like, I'll take that under advisement. And they suggest do it on a secure line. He's like, okay, that's a good call, good call. The secure line ended up being kind of a bad choice. I mean, I guess if Jameson ended up keeping this information to himself, it would have been. But the conversation goes like Carnus admitting that he made the terrorist story up and took the hostages himself. Yeah. And he did it all just to get Jameson to show up and come to Morda. In a different version of this script, this is the moment where you find out that secretly Carnus and Jameson are in league and they've created this situation in order to. to do some nefarious thing.

And they are utterly not because the very next thing Jameson does is disclose this charade to Picard. Yeah, and crucially, he has not shown himself to Carnus. Like blowing in the call from the dark room, ignorant of the de-aging process. What is he doing that for? Why isn't he just using an audio call?

When you do FaceTime, but choose dark room? It's show time. Then why don't you show your face? You fucking coward. They really hate each other and have bad history that is implied but not elucidated by this conversation. But we do feel like, yeah, there's not actually terrorists. Because there's no negotiating to do, this is going to be like a hostage rescue mission. And guess who's going to lead it, Ben?

Admiral Mark Button is going to lead it. He wants to like step on the gas a little bit so that they get there ahead of time and preserve the element of surprise. Don't like that he's sitting in the middle chair for this. Just feels wrong. Picard looks so pissed. Yeah. Something on your mind?

Just want to let you know you're sitting in my chair. We learn a little bit about this city. Like there was a different city that became rubble and then they just built on top of that. So there's this system of tunnels underneath. And that's probably where they'll keep the hostages. and we still don't even know what Carnus wants at this point he's like this is just so weird

like why did this happen why is any of this happening everything about this is super fucking weird and we cut down to a conversation between Anne and Dr. Crusher and counselor Troy and they are also talking about how weird everything has been since this episode

started and Anne is like very, very distraught that her husband has risked his own life for this stupid mission. And Troy's like, well, there are millions of lives in the balance. So that's good, probably, right? It's the stupidity of the mission and also the idea that like the person you've been with for a very long time is suddenly into looking better and working out and stuff. Like I think this is coded a little bit as that too. like Anne Jameson is like it can't be the mission right like there's someone else someone I don't know about I mean you should have seen the jump he tried to give me in our guest quarters like

he hasn't done that in many years you got a like like that can't just be this reverse aging drug like that that had NRE written all over it doctor she has to know no no what one of the saddest parts of this episode and there aren't many parts that like really evoke a strong reaction, but when she says it's not fair that he gets to go back and live his life over again while I get to stay old, that really hit big time. It does not feel like the drug is something she'd be willing to take. And as they are processing this, another shoe drops, which is that he is not stabilizing. Beverly is watching his system go absolutely bug nuts. And it does not seem like that is slowing down.

Yeah, Anne's not going to have to worry about him reliving his youth. He's not going to make it very far. Over in the conference room, Admiral Jameson is experimenting with seeing if he can drink the way he used to when he was younger. When Picard walks in and we learn that this is pretty late at night and neither of them can sleep. And Picard wants to know, this would be a good moment to just decide if you really want to go through with this.

Like we got a beat here. We could take a beat. We've got a moment. Like, you could always bail on this whole thing, Admiral Jameson. Do you want to do like captains walking the ship ahead of a battle, kind of just like collect our thoughts here? Picard's doing this while looking out the window, and he's not seeing what's going on behind him,

which is Jameson in his conference room chair, slowly bouncing down some steps into the light. And when you see him, He is beautiful. I would never expect an office chair to successfully make that look like a graceful moment. And somehow, like, he's just got that it factor. It just works. Yeah, truly does.

Jamok, Angela and Tanaga. Damok. Angelad and Tanaga. Why risk your life now? Like, you already risked your life by taking this drug. Now you're risking it in a second way by making this a raid instead of a negotiation. The card's like, how are you an and doing? It looks like you're looking for a way out.

How long have you had that boner? But also, like, you're taking my guys down there. Like, my crew is going to be your team. So, like, I think you got to at least let me in on the. risks you think that this entailed. Anyway, I'd just like to say that I feel with your participation, this mission has a better than average chance to succeed where others will fail. And we learned a little bit about the like the history of Carnus and the, and the clan.

And this seems like there was a sort of a more feudal or or more like failed state kind of situation going on the planet back in the day 40 years ago. And Carnus was the son of one of the chiefs. And they, like, they did do this hostage thing one time before where they, they got a bunch of Federation citizens and took them hostage. And the official story is that Jameson went in there and just chopped it up and cut deals and saved the hostages. But what was never disclosed is that he gave Carnus a bunch of weapons. But he also gave Carnus's enemies weapons to balance the scale. a little bit. We've got to have weps.

Amazing. So he caused the civil war he claimed to prevent, pretty much. This is a redemption arc in Jameson's mind. Like I can go back and write the wrong of having created a situation in which millions of people could die at the hands of Carnus and people like him. He falsified a bunch of records. He makes the case that it's not a prime directive violation if you give to everyone equally. What a great carve-out that is. It's just communism at that point, right? In the transporter room,

Jameson gets ready to lead this Dustbuster Club to the surface when Picard shows up to protest, and Jameson reminds him of what he said in that earlier scene about. He's the one in charge. But for some reason, that won't stop Picard from joining this away team. So he joins Worf, Data, Yard, and Jordi, in heading down there.

I love the way Picard puts this to Riker, that it is like a, this is a captain's prerogative move in an extraordinary circumstance. It completely shuts down the argument that he knows Riker wants to make about it not being safe for the captain to go on away missions. And away they go. And Jameson identifies the tunnels that were in immediately. And they just like, yeah, I think you're wrong about this being a good way. to get where you think we need to go because like we looked at the records and there's a dead end up there and also my tricorder agrees and he's like your tricorder doesn't know shit I've been down here before you've never been down here let's face it mr fordall we're lost he leads

them to this dead end and gets warf and yard to cut through this this brand new wall that is in a place that he doesn't remember then do you feel like there's a thing that happens if you cross phaser streams. Because when you see Yaron Wharf like wave these around at the wall, I was, I was like, ooh, what could happen here? We don't get an answer to that question. We also don't get a great answer for like, why would we cut through this wall? Why didn't we just beam down on the opposite side of it? Or beam out the hostages. And fucking Jameson is like, oh, there's no substitute for just being boots on the ground, is there? Jordie like rolls a really good perception check and it's like there's a bunch of trap triggers up ahead.

Jordy's most vital in a tripwire situation, right? Like he's the guy you want. He really is. Yeah. There's a risk of those. And just as he's warning everybody to like tread lightly as they go down this hallway, a bunch of hench's attack. And Wharf does a great like flying leap to get Jameson out of the way from getting shot.

It turns into a great big firefight. I want to say I love Carnus's shock troops. I love seeing them fly around and shoot. I love that their weapons are set on kill. Who gives a shit? Like, if you're those guys, shoot to kill. I also really loved the little dialogue between Data and Picard that established that. Like, Data says that they're set to kill, and Picard's like, I've heard it before, Data.

Like, there's something about the way a phaser sounds that lets you know whether it's on a killy set. or not. Jameson stands to return fire, but he gets crippled by chest pains again. And when he's down and incapacitated, this is the moment Picard's like, I'm in charge again. With Jameson down, he can finally control the OA team and he gets them beam back to Enterprise. This is a thing that they've done a couple of times now in early season one that I always love, which is the handheld shot of Picard entering the bridge from the turbo lift. Yeah. And, and, I like it too. Everybody waiting to see like, okay, like, how fucked is the situation?

The captain's about to come in here and push buttons and take actions. Because what that shot does, narratively, is like it puts you in POV without being actually POV because Picard crosses in front of the camera. Yeah. So you feel momentarily like him and the eyes are on you, but then when he crosses in front and addresses the crew, you're suddenly apart from that again. And then you are him once again when he turns around and goes past back into the turbo lift. I really like the sequence. You're right.

There is a FaceTime call with Carnus. And Carnus is pissed and he wants to talk to Jameson. But Jamison can't come to the phone right now. He's really sick. Sick or well, you have 10 minutes to beam him down. Picard goes and meets him bedside in Six Bay. Did you do the math on how long it took him to get to Six Bay and the best? side of Admiral Jameson, because as soon as he gets their Riker blows in a call and he's like,

hey, did you know that you have five minutes now? He promises the method of execution will be most painful. Hey, Picard, did you make any stops on your way to Six Bay or something? You know what happened is Picard got like halfway there, and he was like, ooh, rollo's. And he like saw a vending machine. He put the dollar in and it did that thing where it clunks against the glass and it doesn't actually fall down. And they're just like trying to shake the machine.

Ben, I have an incredible business idea for you. Okay. For me. Why aren't there vending machines on elevators? Yeah. Especially in hotels. Because I'm thinking of Picard on a turbo lift on the ship. Maybe he's hungry for a snack.

Maybe a lot of people are. But like, you need to use an elevator in a hotel. And where are vending machines in hotels? The worst possible places hidden with the ice machines. No one's going in there. But what if every time you got on an elevator, there was like a mini corner unit vending machine? I love this. You know, my father-in-law's whole family, not him, but like his dad and like his brother and like everybody, everybody in their family were in the vending machine business in Philadelphia. Let's do a meeting with them.

Yeah, like we got to take a meeting. Like now that the transition is complete, like we were. Ben, it's the way out of all of this for us. The next thing in the bonus feed is just like a Zoom recording of us, like, talking through the logistics of, like, reincorporating in Pennsylvania as a vending machine logistics operation. So this is a Rob, Bill, and Windy show from here. You and I have gone into vending. Yeah. Yeah.

Make it so. Jameson has gone into the shower, it looks like. He is soaked. And why is the carpet all wet, talk? I don't know, Margo. But we don't have much time. We've got to get down there. And Jamison is like, okay, well, I'll just go give myself to Carnus.

Like, he'll take me in exchange for the hostages. Like, that can be the trade. And Picard's going to go down with him. The energy of it is really he could die here on the bed for nothing, or he could die on the surface for something. So why not see if we can exchange his life for hostages? Well, there's some value to it, right? Yeah.

Yeah. Number one, informed Carnus will be be beaming down in less than five minutes. Did you say we, sir? Me. Yeah, yeah. How do you feel like Carnus came around to this actually being Jameson when they beamed down? Because, like, when they come into his office, he's like, all right, but like I said

Jameson, and none of you are that. And then they're like trying to convince him that this 23-year-old wet guy is Jameson. The Jameson I knew was dry. Almost always. How fucking stupid do you think I am? I mean, I think it's the totality of the evidence Jameson tries to prevent. It's not just the little details that only one of them would know because they were the only two to attend the meeting. There's not just the little nickname Jameson uses.

There's not just the scar. There's not just Anne Jameson showing up and treating him like he is her loving husband. And like, it's the entire package that I think finally gets him over. Yeah. Oh, and also, Ben, don't forget the little slideshow of production stills showing James and getting younger with every flip of his finger. I was about to say, they should not have shown this. Don't remind us. That's tough.

I also just think, like, I don't know if alien de-aging drug is more plausible than some kind of lie. you could come up with, but like, it feels like there might be a lie that would be better than alien de-aging drug to sell this to Carnus. You're wasting my time, Pinkard. At this point, Jameson is on the floor with his wife. Not in that way. Not in the way he wishes. I mean, like 15 minutes earlier, and it could have been.

Yeah. But no. Not tonight, honey. I'm wet. I'm too wet. Carnus is in this, like, uniquely vulnerable position because he has just a accepted like the biggest, craziest wopper of a statement anyone has ever said to him. And this is when Picard comes in for the kill with the like, all of the violence is actually

your fault. Like, you wanted the weapons. Like, you're mad at him for giving weapons to everybody else. But you fucking chose to fight. You chose the way of violence to get what you wanted for 40 fucking years. And he's like, whoa, I mean, if it had just been us with the weapons, we'd have just killed all the people that disagree with us. Wouldn't that have been better?

Fewer people would have died. It is weirdly a guns don't kill people, people kill people kind of argument Picard has here. And a needs of the many kind of argument that Garnas has. Yeah. Yeah. And I think that both of them kind of show some of the limits of that kind of thinking. Yeah. Anyways, RSVP, Jameson.

And with that, I guess Karnas is satisfied that the villain of his entire existence has died. And so the hostages can go home. So that's good. Yeah. Safe and sound. And on the bridge of the enterprise, the card tells Riker that the quest for youth is always futile. Why is he telling Riker this? Riker doesn't have a problem with his age or mortality.

No way. The sales pitch of like, there are some advantages. to age and wisdom really fucking land on deaf ears. Yeah, I think Riker is exactly the wrong audience for this. If I'm Riker, I'm not saying it, but what I'm thinking is, I think you're protesting too much or whatever. I'm not thinking about this stuff at all. And so they head for ISIS 3 at the end of the episode,

and that brings us to a close, Ben. Fun. But I have a big question for you, and that is, like especially at the end, This episode is pretty explicit about the idea of age being superior to beauty or youth, even in an advanced future, you know? But if you could have both, that would be pretty nice. I feel young. I want you to pretend for a moment that you're an old man, even older than you are now, if you possibly could. Yeah.

And also imagine, you look terrible. Just really bad, Ben. And maybe you also have a terrible disease. All right, you have all this in mind, all these factors? I want to go to there. That sounds like the briar patch for me. Are you the type that would take an experimental drug to cure what hurts you? Why or why not?

I've known a few people that have like run out of the ones that are approved and gotten into the clinical trials of the ones that aren't. And they're like inhuman testing because the people are terminal. So what's the difference from an ethical standpoint, I guess, is the logic? And you don't know as much about what you're signing up for with those as you do about some of the others. And yet a certain type of person is motivated by that glimmer of hope. Yeah. And I'm tremendously admiring of those people. it can be very easy to like look around these days and just completely despair of anything good

ever happening again. And yet we are given such an optimistic example by somebody that helps advance medical science by trying something like that on themselves. Are you that person though? I don't know how I would predict what my headspace would be like in a scenario like that. Like if I'm like really old and I'm ugly, you add ugly to old and I'm, I'm out, man. I'm, you know, keep your experimental drug. But if I'm like a silver fox, you know, if I'm looking good the way Mark Jameson is at the beginning of this episode, like still really rakeish and alluring in the way that only an older man can be, give me the drug.

I think for me it's just a quality of life thing. Like either I've chosen to fight and I'm fighting all the way because quality of life will be maintained or if I'm told with some assurance that like it's going to be brutal and bad. Fuck that. Yeah. I'm punching out. You're a dogged individual though. I think you got a lot of fight in you.

Yeah. Well, we'll see when the time comes. Ben, it is time now for Priority one messages. I hope there's nothing fatal in there. Priority one message from Starfleet coming in on secured channel. Need a supplemental. Supplement. Uploan.

Yeah, it's extra. By the interest alone, could be enough to buy this ship. Then we got a promotional priority and message here. Want to hear it? Mm-hmm. Goes like this. Admiral Jameson spent 45 years saying he'd fix things later. Then took alien de-aging drugs and died about it.

Don't be a Jameson. I wrote, You aren't a lazy piece of shit. From procrastination to productivity. A book for every first. friend of DeSoto, he keeps kicking the can down the corridor. It's short, it's funny, and it won't kill you like the alien de-aging drug did. And unlike Jameson, you still have time. Probably. Get one for yourself and every member of your Dustbuster Club. And here's how you do that,

Ben. You know the scarf economy is real. You've known it since episode two. Well, the economy is open for business. Head to Timothy Scott.org slash scarves. That's Timothy spelled like Timothy and Scott spelled like Scott with two T's dot org slash scarves to get your copy no dustbuster required no alien drugs, no 45 year delay just click the link by the book and make it so

pick one up for yourself and every member of your crew this is from this book's author Ben Timothy Scott who wrote You aren't a lazy piece of shit You aren't a lazy piece of shit Ben You just need to read this book I guess so I love the title of this

I love the fact that the author Timothy Scott picked this episode to pair the book with. I feel like that's very apt, a very funny choice. I think that's fun now that we've opened up prior to and messages in this way, like where you can choose what episode it drops into. Yeah. We're going to be seeing more of this. I also just love the thing that Timothy Scott pointed out that Admiral Jamison is like the ultimate, we'll fix it in post guy.

Yeah. Yeah. You don't need to be like that. You can be like Timothy Scott making good choices, aligning things to specific dates and getting it done. All you need is this book. I know we've heard this about writing before, but like you just write for the edit. You're writing to produce something that you can then affect later. And so many parts of your life are like that.

It just comes down to the doing. Yeah. And less about the quality of the doing, but just getting it done. Adam, this is a personal one from the third chew. to the pod folks and FODs. Goes like this. Did you know that in the game Star Trek, colon Voyager dash across the unknown,

you get to make your own Tuvix? Then either kill him or fail all missions needing Neelix or Tuvok after that? As of this writing, there is no way to save all three. It is an average game, but I love the subject matter. Perhaps y'all will too. Nutscrew the Tuvix solutions in this. game. I love slash hate the idea that there could be a video game mission that is like unsolvable

like this. I think that is absolutely diabolical because I'm the sort of open world video game player that like I'll keep grinding on a thing I'm obsessing over because I want to I want to succeed and the idea that like you could make a choice here and have a have it screw you forever. Oh, that's tough. You're the kind of person that would go in there and reprogram it, change the conditions of the test. Yeah. Because you reject the idea of a no-win scenario.

I'd eat an apple during. Ben, our final priority one message is of a personal nature, and it is to my fellow Hootie Daddy Gabe. It's from your barrel brother Sam. And this person is requesting an Odo drop and a Harry Kim drop. The Mr. Bucket. Something about it reminds me of being in the womb. Get up, Harry.

Who are you? Harry Kim. Parents must be very proud. Who are you? They come as a pair. Who are you? Harry Kim. Who else is she supposed to get chummy with?

Harry Kim and your mom? Very proud. Who are you? Harry Kim. Chummy, chummy. And your mom? Very proud. Harry Kim.

Who are you? Harry Kim. Here's their message. Gabe, thanks for keeping STLV weird. and wild with me, would want no one else to be my drunk Shimoda. Ben and Adam, keep up the great work. Your podcast kept me sane when I was blind for a year. Whoa, that can happen? That sounds tough. God, how many more podcasts would you listen to if you were blind for a year? Holy moly. Oh, man. Probably a lot. Glad we could help.

I'm kidding. Well, thanks to everyone who got a P1 on today's episode. The way you can do that if you're listening and wishing you'd gotten one is by going to greatesttreck.com or straight to podshop.biz where we sell them. You can pick your date. You can put the message you want on the episode you want it on. It really helps with the production of this show. Thanks.

Really means a lot. Thanks. Ben, it's time for a game. And the very first and probably only edition of, how short is your season? Then the date this episode drops will be the Monday after Star Trek, Las Vegas, and the day of Prana-cabana. Okay.

The pool party that we're throwing, for some reason, at the Rio. It'll be the end of several days of work and fun, and we're going to feel like shit at the end of it. but you may feel worst of all. I have one simple question for you, and to get it right means you win the game and the esteem of Friends of DeSoto everywhere, but if you fail to answer this one question correctly,

you will have to dump a bucket of ice down the front of your swim shorts in front of everyone at Pranacabana. Are you ready? Oh, boy, I'm ready. I mean, you know, 50-50 I was going to do that anyways, but uh i'll put a spin on this to make it distinct from something you would normally do uh you'll have to do this in front of everyone like take the bucket out to the main pool and like facing the entire pool area

do that are we talking from like that grotto part or or like just kind of like everyone i have an announcement from the pool deck kind of thing the intent is to make this moment the most public it can be whatever that looks like at the time. We'll just make sure that you get a great big audience for this moment. If you answer this question incorrectly, which you might get it right. We'll see. I really fucking hope this is an easy question. I think it might be for you. I think you might have this. Okay. So here it is. Okay. Ben, everyone knows that meteorologists group seasons into precise three-month blocks, assigning them exactly the same length each year. But did you know, that astronomical seasons are different.

These are determined by Earth's position relative to the sun and vary in length because of the Earth's elliptical orbits. In 2026, spring and summer are longer than 90 days and autumn and winter are shorter than 90 days. So, Ben, I'm asking you to name which meteorological season is shorter than its astronomical season version and which one is longer. Let's be honest about meteorological.

Just a bunch of fucking stats nerds. Wow. You said it. You know? Four seasons. One shorter than it's astronomical, one longer than it's astronomical. Let's start with which one you think is shorter. In 2026.

Yeah. I'm feeling like they will be antipodal to each other. It will be like either spring and fall or winter and summer. Ooh. I'm going to guess winter short, summer long Final answer? Final answer?

Ben, exactly the opposite. Fuck! Fuck! God fucking damn it! Summer is shorter by one day. I'm so fucking God, fuck! Winter is longer by three days.

You are so close. Fucking right seasons. Your instinct to like make them antipotal like you said, it was right there. I thought for sure you had it. You had it in the jaws with that. I snatched a bucket of ice out of the jaws of victory.

Look out for this... God damn you. This great punishment happening at Star Trek, Las Vegas this year. Can't wait to see that. Can't wait for everyone to experience it. That was fun. Hmm. Fun. More fun ahead on next week's episode,

and here's our producer to tell you all about that, along with our credits. Bye, bye. The Greatest Generation is an Uxbridge Shemota podcast. It's hosted by Adam Pranika and Ben Harrison, who also did the edit this week, and it's produced by Wendy Pretty. Next week, we will be back with another episode of Star Trek The Next Generation,

so hide your kids, because we're headed to Aldea for Season 1 episode 17, when the bow breaks. Until then, thank you to all the members who are supporting this show. If you want to join and get an ad-free feed, plus a lot of great bonus episodes, sign up at greatesttrek.com or just click the support link that's in the show notes right there in your podcatcher, and thanks for your support. Music for the greatest generation is by dark materia. Social media is managed by Bill Tilly and Rob Adler, who also puts together the greatest newsletter every month.

Visit Podshop.com.Biz to get signed up for that, you can also book a P1 there, and that helps support the show too, so thanks. And along with our official social media pages on Instagram, Blue Sky, and YouTube, you can also check out one of the great FOD run communities online. Facebook, Reddit, Discord, Mastodon, and Wikia. Go join one of those groups and use the hashtag Greatest Gen when you post about the show. And last thing, don't forget to subscribe to Greatest Trek and join us for ongoing coverage of Strange New World Season 4. That's all for now.

We'll see you next week on The Greatest Generation. Huxbridge, Shimoda.