The Greatest Generation - The Red Bucket (DS9 S1E3)

Episode Date: October 30, 2017

When a Barnaby lookalike gets a decidedly unhappy ending on the holodeck, Constable Odo becomes the prime suspect. But when the kids of Deep Space Nine use the distraction to do pranks around the station, it’s up to a very unlikely character to teach them a lesson. What do we do about movie talkers? What’s the difference between where a Bajoran keeps their genitals and where they put them? Is Odo’s relationship history more problematic than Geordi’s? It’s the episode that’s pro Vichy Bubble.

Priority 1 message from Starfleet coming in on Secured Channel. Hey friends of Disodo. Before today's episode, we just wanted to take a moment to talk about the historic labor actions being taken by writers and actors in the American Film and Television industry. If you're a fan of the work done by the people who make Star Trek, we hope you'll join us in standing in solidarity with the folks who actually bring these adventures to life. Over the past several years, the AMPTP, the organization that represents the American Film and Television Production Studios, have reduced the profit from movies and TV going to workers. And in so doing,

they've attempted to weaken the labor unions that represent those workers. They wouldn't even engage the unions on many issues in their negotiations. And so a strike was the only course of action to take. Adam, Wendy and I have been having a lot of internal discussions about how best to stand with the unions and we are continuing those conversations in a dynamic situation. We're doing our best to understand where the picket lines are in these digital spaces,

and we would never intentionally cross one. With the information we have, we feel like we can do more good talking about and supporting the strike and continuing our show as planned. We'll keep you informed about what all this means for greatest trek specifically. Today we're making a contribution to the Entertainment Community Fund. This fund exists to help all the people whose livelihoods have been put on hold because the AMPTP refuses to negotiate

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and season two of Star Trek Picard. We've set up a page where you can also contribute. It's at friendsofdecotoforlabor.com. That's friendsofdecisoto for labor.com. That's friendsofdisoto for labor.com. Link in the episode description. Okay, now let's get on with the show. The god of the universe, the death of the universe. Command to Benjamin, since the better is the star-based, deep space knight. Welcome to the greatest generation, deep space knight. Star Trek podcast.

My two guys are a little bit embarrassed to have a Star Trek podcast. I'm Adam Pryanaka. I'm Ben Harrison. Ben, I have nothing to say to you. I'm a little story that I could relate. Do it, please, because I got nothing. I was at the movies last night at a movie theater beloved to you and I, the theater at the Americana at Brand.

Oh yeah. This is a, that's where we outdoor mall in Glendale, California. Was it snowing when you left? No. We and our wives went there to see a rival one time when we were all in LA. It's true.

A Dennis Villanuev picture. Villanuev, I don't know how to say his last name. Anyways, I was trying to go out with my wife to see his new movie, Blade Runner 2052 or whatever. And we're sitting in the theater and a trailer comes on for a new movie about Winston Churchill and as the trailer ends, a guy sitting directly in front of me in a French accent yells at the screen he gives millions of jommens, he has an asshole! What? I don't, like, why would I look at each other like, what is this guy's fucking problem?

Or then the next movie that plays, or the next trailer that plays is about special ops guys that got sent into Afghanistan the day after 9-11. And like that trailer ends, and the guy just like keeps yelling at the screen like, who is being falsies propaganda? Oh my God. People are like really uncomfortable in the theater and I just lean forward and I say, listen man, you're in a country where some bad things have happened in theaters and you're making people really uneasy

I'm asking you to quiet down or I'm gonna go tell the Theater management to kick you out and they're gonna kick you out of here and wow good job by you, Ben He turns around and says are you threatening me? Are you threatening? And then I was like, no, I'm not threatening you. I'm saying shut the fuck up or you're gonna get kicked out. And at this point, my wife is like convinced that this guy is gonna like pull double uzies out of his coat and just start shooting up the theater.

So she insists that we go. And he basically walked everybody in the theater. Every single person, not him and his stupid buddy that were there to see the movie, left out of fear, because he was so fucking unhinged and crazy. Wow. And so we go to the theater people and we're like, hey listen, there's a crazy guy in there.

Everybody is scared to be in there with him. And he's also, like, even if he is harmless, which it kind of seems like he is, like he is guy that thinks it's fine to yell in the movie theater. And that's not a fun guy to be in there with when you're trying to watch a movie. That's not harmless. Yeah. So, and you know, like it kind of, like it tipped us right up the line of yelling fire in a in a crowded theater, you know, like Like he he started yelling free speech shit at me and I like I walked out and I was like wait a minute like that's like not really protected speech like like making making crazy

Like pronouncements about about shit and you know in a movie theater about shits in a movie theater. Not necessarily a place where you are free to just scream your crazy ideas at everybody. There are very few rules about seeing a movie in a movie theater and I thought that they were almost universal, Ben. The rules of course being citizen is still as possible. Do not use a cell phone for any reason. And shut the fuck up.

Don't sit right behind me with a pocketbook full of individually wrapped hard candies that you then crunch on. Sure. And so like I we went out and like we told the people at the theater and my wife and I just ducked into another theater to listen for when they walked out with him and we're saying they're waiting and nothing is happening. And so I go out and I'm like, hey, are we getting rid of this guy or what's going on? And they're like, oh yeah, well, he's not doing anything now.

So it was like, wow. He emptied the theater out, guys. And so we go up and we're like, oh yeah, well he's not doing anything now. So, I was like, wow. He emptied the theater out, guys. And so we go up and we're like, let's just get a refund. And the guys like, yeah, you can get a refund. And so he walks us up and he's processing it. And I'm watching all of the other non-crazy's from the theater come out to get their refunds. And because they were all also kind of waiting

in a place where if they took him out, the guy wouldn't see them, you know. Right. Because they didn't want him to like be waiting for them in the parking lot probably when they came out. And also like you all would have gone back into the theater had he been walked right or no. Right, we just wanted to watch the movie. So the theater winds up having to refund every single person in the room and comp us free tickets for the next movie while also kicked like they eventually decided to kick this guy out also. And it's like so like what you could have done is just go in there with extreme prejudice and say, hey man, you broke the rules, you're going

and take the one problem guy out, and maybe his buddy also. And instead, they lost the business of an entire theater worth of people. How many people? I don't, it wasn't like super strong attendance, but I would estimate like 15 or 20 people walked out and got refunds. That is crazy that the burden of proof is somehow greater than 20-ish people.

Like, what is their threshold? Yeah, it was weird, man. And also with how you're not wrong about the feelings of being in a movie theater with strangers who may be unhinged, like I would have hoped that they would have snapped into a little more action about this, like to a perceived threat, like it's not like you came to them complaining of a loud talker, you complained that someone was acting in an unstable way. And that is a totally different picture to paint. Like, even like extending the perhaps generous benefit of the doubt to him that he wasn't a crazy person,

but just had like strong political beliefs that he felt were being disrespected by these trailers. They're fucking trailers for movies. Like, nobody in here made these movies. We didn't decide what trailers to play. Like, who are you impressing with this tirade? For my friends and for my wife, I am famously known as someone who just does not move and does not jog in movie theaters during movies like dead almost. The Prenica Catatonia they caught. Right, that's from whatever reason, that's how I like to enjoy a movie that is frequently

how I enjoy live music also, like just no spent cycles on anything other than the absorption of the thing that I'm there Do absorb and God I want to say this was like This had to be like very early on in high school some friends parents of mine were hosting an exchange student and And this young lady was from from Germany. I'm almost positive and Everyone thought it would be a great idea if I took her out to a movie, which I did. And this nice young lady was a movie talker to the degree that I've never run in two

cents. Like it was total normal volume conversation during the movie previews, and that's something that you know like can be forgiven, it the movie previews. And that's something that can be forgiven. It's the previews. I treat previews as the movie though. I don't wanna talk during the previews. I wanna watch the previews. So I don't wanna talk during the previews either,

but I don't mind people, you know, Kibitsa and being like, oh, should we see that? No, or whatever. Like, that's totally fine. But it became abundantly clear that the movie portion of the evening was going to be treated the same way.

Wow. And my, my idiot high school sensibility, like I did not have the tools to articulate how uncomfortable this was making me. And I think like I'm trying to remember what exactly I said to her, but I think it was something like we don't talk during movies here. And it was about that poorly phrased. And this pair of seats we. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

And like, I forgot what we were there to see. And like, it was a total thing. Like, people were turning around and staring. And like, she was creating a disruption to a lot of people. Yeah. And so I said that. And she did not talk anymore for the movie. And she did not really talk even

after the movie. That was the last time I saw her. I mean, maybe that's just a cultural difference. I know that there's plenty of cultures where the movie theaters primarily a social environment, and also there's a movie going, you know. But yeah, it is hard to convince people for whom that is the normal state of affairs that what you want to do is just sit silently and absorb the movie. Right, right. Well, I think the lesson to be learned here, Pan, is you should have seen the movie at the Grove. Yeah, should have gone to the Grove. Well, now I have a pair of comp tickets at the Americana, so I might try and go back tonight and watch the film.

God, it's so hard to choose between the grove and the Americana. You're a lucky man to be a newly minted L.A. I mean, the benefit, if I go back to the Americana, is that I can get some more dinty fun Hell yeah, man those green beans though those green beans though Ben at the end of that movie in high school I I became what the title of today's episode is Season one episode three a man alone. This episode opens with Dax on the meditation tip in a

Hollis suite and the doors fling open and in walks Dr. Julian Bashir. How did you know it was me? And without turning around or turning her head even, Dax identifies who has walked up behind her. Why are there no locks in hollow suites? Riker would have big problems with this. I am a frequent meditator. I would have a real problem with someone walking in on me during. I basically don't want anyone walking in on me during doing anything, Ben.

Well, that's the big reveal is that she's not, in fact, meditating. She's doing a puzzle. If you're working on a crossword puzzle, would it be bad for somebody to walk in on you, Daring? Yeah, the point is it's Daring. It's Daring anything, and someone is walking in bin. Those are things I don't like.

One thing that has been very hard for my wife to understand in our relationship is that if I am in the kitchen cooking, I want no interruptions of any kind. Like, I don't want her in there. I don't want her asking me a question from across the house. I want I am headphones in head down focusing on cooking and that makes zero sense to her. Like the kitchen is such a social space for my wife and it is the opposite for me.

social space for my wife and it is the opposite for me. That's fantastic. Dax, like any old, is primarily interested in doing puzzles. In this case, she's doing a puzzle that looks like a big bubble. You know, those bubble makers that are like a rope that you dip in the bubble sauce and then sort of fling around and make a giant bubble? That's what this looks like. You're always seeing somebody selling those on the street in Europe.

They make it look so easy, Ben. Right. He killed so many of Zibabels. You pups them without any, any probable cause. Like who is really complaining that Winston Churchill fought the Germans in World War 2? Yeah, who side is he on? I couldn't figure it out.

Like were you big V-Shi proponent back then? The guys are very pro V-Shi bubble. Like I want to subscribe to his newsletter just to like see if I can figure out how unhinged he really is Did he go into the parking lot and get into a pujo? Yeah, he he turned the key the Citroen Lifted up off of its wheels and throw away Lift it up off of its wheels and throw away Beepie and I think that's just about exhausted my entire knowledge of French culture

Yeah, he didn't have a bag of popcorn. He had a bag of snails at him. Yeah, he'd be them snails. 32 ounce cup of wine. I'm drinking some German wine right now. I'm drinking a Gruenerfett Veltlinner as we record today's program. Now you're the one killing Germans been. German beers. I'm popping German grape bubbles. Bischier has continued his awkward love for Dax in a way that is starting to appear pretty purvy. He knows that Dax is hundreds of years old and is a ankylo sore like he knows this. He's a medical professional, but he appears to totally embrace how superficial he's acting towards her. Like, he loves her container. Yeah, I would say that the DAX body, the JEDZ part of DAX is a football. The Ankleosa part of DAX is Lucy, and Dr. Bashir is Charlie Brown.

This episode continues the introduction of a problem that we've run into with a number of characters on the show, which is the pronoun problem W slash R slash T DAX. And Cisco has this problem throughout. Bashir has this problem throughout, but she has the problem. To a certain degree, DAX just sort of permits it to happen around her. She hasn't put her... She hasn't put her... Yeah, she hasn't put her pronoun preference in her Twitter bio.

So everybody's a little bit wishy-washhy on what the right thing is. Yeah. Like in a way it seems like she's really above it. Like she's like, yeah, call me whatever gender you want. I don't give a fuck. Which is cool, but I mean for someone who is so wizard over the centuries, like she could not give any fewer fucks about her friend's struggling with this. She does not care, which is both great and aggravating to everyone around her. I'd be curious to hear from trans folks in our viewership, like how that feels to them, because on the one hand it seems like, you know, gender is unimportant in a way that seems like advanced in a way.

But also, if you're trans, your gender identity is super important to you. And I could see this coming off as patronizing of that. It's not DAX's job to woke people. Yeah, which is, I mean, I think people in minority groups are often like stuck in this position of like people demanding to be woken by them, you know, right? Like explain to me this. So there's that throughout this episode, which you and I have a varying degree of ability

to relate to. But one thing we can relate to most acutely is an argument between Keko and O'Brien happening in public view, Ben. Not a good look when you argue in public the way Miles and Keko are. Great fine says, chief Orion and the misses are having problems. They're out of earshots, so you can't tell what's happening at this point, but not enjoying a meal. Yeah, they have gone out on a date,

and the date has devolved into incoherent, distant bickering that everybody else in Quark's bar is uncomfortably observing from afar. What we finally get at the end of this argument is that Keko doesn't like it on DS9 and Miles is like, you knew what you were getting into babe? When you were rolling with me? I'm a loner Keko, a rebel. How did Keko and Miles not talk about this reassignment

before going there? Keko is treating this like a huge surprise. Do you really want to raise your daughter in this place, Miles? As if they did not discuss this beforehand. Yeah. If O'Brien didn't describe the scene before going here, he's made a terrible mistake. I mean, it's like I can kind of relate to Keko right now because I am a freshly minted Angelino despite my desire to live in New York over my desire to live in LA. Like I made a choice based on a desire of my wife

to move here. And you know, it is not exactly the environment I pictured inhabiting for the rest of my life. But yeah, like I did also come into it with eyes open and it's not like I'm gonna make it my wife's problem every time something about LA irritates me, you know. Right, and that seems to be the the ongoing terms of their emotional warfare right now. It's amazing that they got you episode three before we saw Keko. Because she's not really even mentioned in Emissary and doesn't really come up in episode two either. So this is like our

first glimpse of her as like, oh yeah, she's going to be a character on this show too. I mean, she's clearly been there the whole time because she came over off of the enterprise when it was there in the in the premiere episode. But like it's hard to tell what she was doing when Deep Space 9 was a total dump like it was more of a gelopy two episodes ago than it is now. Yeah what was she doing? I don't know. Like everybody. Do you realize how incredible this is? No, of course you don't. There's a fun interaction between Quark and Odo as they are observing this fight where Odo says like I don't get the whole Gettin' together with somebody thing. Not for me. I'll never understand the humanoid need to.

Couple. As a non-humanoid, I can safely stay out of that. Straight jacket seems to have mad clean. And then he goes on to describe his understanding of how relationships work. And it seems to be like exclusively based on an observation of how relationships work and it seems to be like Exclusively based on an observation of how miles and Kiko's relationship works Odo discloses to cork that he's the moderator of the R slash red pill

Redded group of this boy like he is He is very angsty. Yeah, he has not had a good relationship history at all. I really feel like Odo could satisfy a woman too if she were open to it. Yeah, he can get to a lot of different densities and girth. I mean, he's gonna fill her up. You know, fill you up. Do you think that Odo and Jordy exchange DMs

on Reddit a lot. Oh man, they're best friends I bet. Well shit man, speaking of huge popsicles Adam. Jake runs into Nog on the Promenade, Nog the young Phurangian, and Jake is like, is like kind of tagging along and trying to make friends with him. And this kind of, this episode really jumps rapidly between three storylines, the Jake and Nag friendship,

becoming a thing, and the Miles and Keko conflict, and another one that hasn't come up yet, but it's a really intense intercut ABC story episode. Like, there are scenes that are really short and really efficient in this episode in a way that I think is very new to the franchise. Right, and I think this Jake and Noggin introduction

is one of them. Jake, of course, the proof that attempts to kill the jumper have been unsuccessful is in a head to toe brown, one Z. And Noggin is enjoying like a rocket pop with an extremely flared bass. Yeah, that thing's not getting stuck up anywhere, Ben. Well, with this giant spacebad hole off the edge of the station, you've got to flare the base of basically everything. Indeed. The A story in this episode starts in this same conversation between Quark and Odo. When Odo notices a bejure in that he has a strong negative reaction to hanging around in Quark's bar and he's like, where that ass wipe show up from.

And Quark says that he showed up a few days ago on a transport and now he's here on the station. And so Odo pretty quickly goes up to this dude and is like, hey buddy, I'm up 26 hours to get off this station. Yeah, he fucking kind of assaults him in front of everyone. Yeah, it's not really the way that you establish command presence. If you're a cop, like completely losing your cool in the first interaction with somebody Not a good look. Yeah. Oh, no is a space station cop who does no Bay the rules Get the hell off my station god damn it Oh, no, you can't just throw people around the front. I'd like that

Who've got enough problems in this precinct? Oh No, I'm gonna need your shield and your peace. But Sarge, I am the shield and the peace. Yeah, oh no, doesn't play by the rules at him, but he gets results, and that's what's important. But in this assault, like it's one of those things where he's like jumping down the guy's throat and Cisco has to break up his his hang with dax to run downstairs and get in between them and it uh, you know, very narrowly

avoids being a pretty ugly scene. Yeah, it's interesting to see I mean quirk is a little bit of a peacemaker here, right? Yeah, like it's kind of like um here, right? Yeah, like it's kind of like, you know, in the big Lebowski, like Lebowski is a character that we know to be a very chill man, but in almost every scene, he's losing his shit at somebody because everything is going so fucked around him. Right. Like, that's sort of how Odo is in this episode. Like he is a guy that is all about following the rules and justice, but he's like

bending them to the breaking point because he really hates this guy. This guy Ibadon, like we get the sense that he and Odo go way back, but Odo in a lifetime of arresting people goes way back with a lot of people. And he's fairly anonymous to the viewer. Like, what makes this guy so special is the fact that Odo hates him so much. I feel like Star Trek is so obsessed with casting guys that look like Barnaby in this show. Yeah. Like, our bad guy in the last episode was a real Barnaby and this guy's a real Barnaby. It's just kind of like generic ass white guys with generic 90s white guy haircuts

and we're supposed to think that they're so bad. Yeah, it's blow dryers all the way down. So this guy goes into a hollow suite and he's having this massage and we get a close-up on the masseuse's fingers and they are just like webbed in the most upsetting way possible and then the the fingers kind of like pull back and

incomes a black-loved fist holding a knife and the knife goes right through Black-clubbed fist holding a knife and the knife goes right through, he goes back, and he is murdered. Adam, I was trying to think, what sounds worse? Murder or having those fingers touch you? I mean, clearly Ibadon wanted it like that. Like, this hollow program is like one of many massage programs that clearly has a sexual component at the end of it because this hollow character starts kissing him on the back, right? And we know where massages that include kisses end up, right? It ends up with a penis going

through a webbed finger. What is abnormal sexual behavior? Who decides, you know? That's not so painful. Ibedon's clearly like fucking those hands later, right? He's a hands guy. Yeah, I don't know. Is that kinky? Is that weird?

You tell me, isn't? Who's to set? Exactly. We don't really know where Bajorans keep their genitals. I guess we don't. But we know where they like to put them, which is hands. So this is a stone cold who done it, because they're doing the crime scene investigation. And it's like, all right, we know that the door opened twice.

One was when he came in, one presumably is when the killer left. But there's no like beaming evidence. We can't figure out how there was a killer in here that he wasn't aware of when he entered the hollow suite. The sheer such an idiot in this scene. He's like, he takes a look at Ibadon's unhappy ending and he's like, the killer had to have a decent knowledge of Bejorn and Attymy to kill this guy with this knife like

Stabbing anyone in the back like that Isn't going to kill them pretty much 99% of the time right and like if it doesn't work the first time You still have the chance to pull it out and do another stab right The picture that gets painted implicates Odo in this. Everyone saw Odo in this guy fight on the promenade. They can't seem to nail down how someone got into the hollow suite and out without being detected. And it seems pretty clear that the only type of person that could do that

could be a goo person. Right. It's like the only person that could get in is could have like slipped under the door. But if a what does a goo person need with a knife if they can just turn their hand into a knife? Well do they find the murder weapon? Yeah, yeah that's just it. Like the murder weapon still sticking out of the guy's back. But what I'm saying is if a shapeshifter wanted to kill a person they they don't need a murder weapon to do it. They are the murder weapon.

You forced the parents that did. Yeah, and you couldn't bring the knife in with you if you're a goo person. There's a really fun bit of trivia here where, you know, when the implication is that Odo or someone like Odo did this, because his alibi is the bucket that he has to sleep in every 18 hours. It's revealed that Odo need some regeneration time in a bucket. And at this point, that song from that children's game popped in my head. Vintage, you ever play Mr. Bucket? bucket. The robotic bucket and his hands are covering the lid and like the kids run around and pick up the balls that shoot out of his mouth. I never played it but I vividly remember the TV commercial. That commercial is one of the classics. What happens when Odo is

implicated here is people come out of the woodwork as being anti-buckites. Yeah. They start doing the whole like torch mob situation. Start throwing bricks at Odo's office. It's not a good scene at all. Yeah, I mean like presumably these are the same kind of people that would have been sympathetic to the Tana Loose school of thought that this should be all bejorans and no aliens around here.

I had the same thought, like, where the fuck did all these bejorans come from? Like, this station is crawling with them. Why are these bejorans also fucking xenophobes? Where do they get the brick? What are the bricks doing laying around there? Somebody was opening up like a hipster, speakeasy type bar down the way, see if they could compete with quark in the, they brought up a bunch of brick to make like a fake brick wall.

But. You're building a space station. You have construction materials like transparent aluminum and titanium. What are they doing building office windows out of like shattery glass? Now when you're constructing an office cubicle on a distant space station, you're going to want to use a laminated glass that has several layers of plastic in between the

lights. That way, if there's any breakage, the sheet will hold together and prevent anybody from getting through the door. It'll keep your angry mob outside, and the heat inside, keeping your warm and cozy while your angry mob screams at you from outside. Enjoy a nice, peaceful rest in your bucket. Well, maniacs, storm the gates. Now for a standard regeneration bucket, I like to use a 5-gallon homedepo iron bucket. They're real steel at 599. We picked up this nylon bucket bag to go around the outside, which has handy pockets for

ratchet wrenches, screwdrivers, torque wrenches, and even an out-of-wrench. They do that thing where the angry mob is outside Odo's office and they fire a phaser into the air. You never see the end of that phaser beam, but no one clears the ceiling for that. It would be fun to cut to the exterior of the station and just show a beam of light going off into space.

Whoops There's sort of a a leader of this group, right? Do you know Mr. Zerum? Yeah, he was the guy that was hanging out with With what's his face the bad guy? He's another real blonde blow-dry guy. Yeah, He's the rabble rouser of the group. He's the guy lighting people's torches. Right. He's the leader of the anti-buckets. They really have cast one kind of guy on this show.

This show is beginning to demonstrate a difficulty in subtlety, right? Because in this episode, in past prologue, the last episode, there's a lot of suspicious squints at the end of scenes. In this episode, there's just a guy wandering around with a hood looking around at people. Yeah, it's like, I wonder if that's the villain. Yeah, like, they don't have a good command of subtlety on the show quite yet. And the mystery is so interesting before they pan over to that guy sitting creepily at the bar. You know? Right.

I can totally picture the producers going like, wow, we've done a great job of diversity and casting with this main cast. Let's just cast all the guys that look exactly the same for any tertiary characters that we might have in the program. They do a bunch of scrapes of this guy's room on his ship and they get some DNA back and they're like studying it and stuff and there's something a little off about it. So they put the DNA into some barbicide and it starts growing into a cocoon-like fleshball that is truly disgusting. When you put DNA into a liquid and it starts bubbling, that's really bad news. That's some gremlin

shit right there. Yeah. Turns out a Dr. Bashir hijacked a large portion of the enterprise's barbicide supply. Yeah, he's got baths of different sizes in there and this thing is growing and pulsing in a disturbing way. Well, all this is going on. Jake and Nag are becoming prank buddies. They are really hooliganing around the Prominent. They release some insects behind some people that are trying to enjoy a nice meal at the Rainforest Cafe. These insects cause these people to get very itchy and then start

Changing colors. These people have like the best table at the Rainforest Cafe. It's the one off in the corner by itself Which is why it's so unbelievable that Nog is basically rooting around under their table undetected as he releases these bugs under them. Like, I think they just got lost in each other's eyes. Like they're clearly on a fairly significant date here. Yeah, this might be third date. Like, there might be sexy times after this,

but instead it's itchy and colorama. Not fun. Yeah, they really go through some shit here. Jake and Nog get nabbed very quickly. Like, the folks definitely don't get any help from anybody, but like the second Jake and Nog start stop laughing, there's like security guy hands on both their shoulders and they're getting marched off to the brink.

One of the stories that is woven through this episode is this O'Brien and Keko story. They're still not happy with their circumstances. O'Brien's offering to get transferred to another station. Keko's like, then I'm going to feel like a shithead for forcing your transfer. And when we see Noggin Jake get up to no good, like we tilt up to Keko who is like watching from above and is like doing that very matronly like kids these days. Always up to no good. Like what these kids need a structure. And so she sort of writes her own story line in describing the problems with the kids on the station.

She's like, don't you miss the schools you used to go to, Jake? What these kids need is a place to go. There needs to be a school here. What it reveals is that Keko is smarter than Starfleet. Did Starfleet made a totally insane omission by not making a plan for there being people on this station. Like, if you bet early on that Kako would ever be portrayed as smarter than Starfleet, you are a billionaire right now. Because that bet paid big time.

Like Starfleet's like, okay, we're gonna be taking over a, like essentially a medium sized town that has the capacity for like thousands of people to be living on it. Let's give them one doctor, one science officer, one guy that knows how to work a wrench and one guy to run the place. We'll have one of the locals be the first officer. Hmm, anything else we need.

Hmm, nope, can't think of anything. They live in a casino hotel with a lot of security. That's what this place is. Like what did they expect society to be like here? Right, and it is like predictably a vice nasty place. And like, like, take OCs that there is like a vacuum of civil society on the station and like the one thing that she is in a position to do is provide some structure to the children which is like, man, I cannot believe that they that that's definitely blew it on this.

How many people are married on this station to a spouse without a station specific job that are just looking for something to do? Like how is Kiko the one that has come up with the idea to start a school? Yeah, why is it on her? Someone on the station is way qualified for this job that Kiko got because she asked for it first

and they have got to be pissed. Well, that's kind of the secret of getting ahead, man, is like it's not necessarily who's best for the job, but who gets there and gets into the position. Yeah, well put. I'm a terrible filmmaker, but I have a pretty good career going right now because I've been willing to put myself forward for things. Yeah, you're what they call good in the room. Medium in the room or just in the room. My rooms are frequently cold. And that's the problem. I promise. So Kiko's like, hey, hey, commander,

I'm gonna need some desks, I'm gonna need some books. Let's start up a school and Cisco's like, we got all kinds of room, we got all these desks. I didn't even notice how many desks we had. Like, you can have them. Like, everything is there for a turnkey school situation. Yeah, I mean, the space is one thing, but I guess everything else can just be replicated, right?

I guess so. Like, like she asks, acts like getting computers for the school as a big deal. It's not. Everything's free. It's the future. Cisco's sort of making a lot of big decisions here. He started a school, he approved the school idea.

He also relieved Mr. he approved the school idea. He also relieved Mr. Bucket from security detail while he's a suspect in this murder. He left that for a long time, right? Because it becomes pretty clear that Odo is suspect number one, like when they are there at the crime scene. But he lets Odo go like two more beats into the investigation before he removes him. And Odo has had like a chance to, you know, investigate the guy's state room on the ship he showed up on and, and like uncover more evidence that points

at himself. So Odo does not take this well well and fuck Odo, you should have recused yourself maybe 15 minutes before this. Yeah, like you should not be attached to this investigation at all and he basically blows up at Cisco at being rightfully put on leave for this. He makes this big speech about how, you know, there's laws that change depending on who's making them, but justice is a higher standard than that, and that's what he's interested in. But like, you can't have justice

where like somebody with a, an interest in the case is going to be deciding how the case goes. You'd think he'd been doing security for like a week. This is a guy who is a career security person and he doesn't rock this. This Odo super corrupt at him. I don't know, he turns to Cisco and he's like, you just don't understand what's going on here.

I'm interested in justice. Yeah. Not your rules, man. But he comes back to his office and it's been like hate-crime to they've written Bucket Boy on the on the walls and... Bucket fucker. Why don't you get that bucket and fuck that bucket bucket fucker? Yeah. Bucket fucker. She creeped me bucket fucker.

Would you help me get this bucket into my van? You see, I broke my arm. I remember the hard it with this bucket. It puts the lotion in the bucket. It puts the lotion in the bucket whenever I disturb older or else it gets the bucket again. Uh, he gets a visit from an unlikely ally in Quirk. I can find out who did it for you. An unlikely ally in Quirk.

I can find out who did it for you. Quirk is picking up the shattered iPads in the office and gathering them. He gathers two or three of these iPads in his arms as he's talking to Odo. He's like, hey, Odo, do you have AppleCare? Because they'll fix this for free the first two times, but then it's like $120 after that.

You wouldn't believe it. I heard a story about the enterprise and they're using like busted up iPads on that ship. It's the flagship. What are they doing running around with these terrible iPads? I'll round it off and bent. Bent iPads? Give me a break.

Have some, have some standards, Starfleet. I mean, come on. These guys are a joke. I can't believe they take over this station. You and I are smarter than that, right? You and me, Odo. Quark is playing in the margins here in the way that Garrick does, in a really fun, interesting way.

Like, he's saying stuff without saying it. He's helping our main characters in a way that's fun. I like that. Quark walks normal. I know that it's non-canonical for Rengi But like the fact that he carries himself with any amount of dignity is such a smart choice Can you imagine seven seasons of him like scrabbling around like like the prank he's dead? I feel deeply unqualified to judge anyone else's dignity Ben I feel deeply unqualified to judge anyone else's dignity pin. I'm just saying as a guy who has none, I appreciate it when I see it in others.

Sure. I'm maybe even a little jealous. He says like Ibu Dan didn't really have people from prison that would have wanted to kill him. He just hung out with other like-minded, bejura dissidents when he was in prison. Because that's the backstory is that Odo put this guy on jail for murdering a Cardassian, which he was released upon the Cardassians being kicked out of Bejor because the provisional government didn't consider

killing Cardassians to be a crime. Early parole for murdering a Cardi. Lucky Ibadon. Yeah, Ibadon didn't hate that Cardassian he killed. He hated what he had become because he killed that cardassian. Meanwhile, back in the six bay, Bashir has discovered that this fleshball shares Ibadon's DNA. Like, he just sort of has a moment of epiphany where he's like, holy shit, I think I know what this is. And they run a couple of tests and sure is shit.

It's, it's a slightly Xeroxed version of Ibadon. It's a copy of a copy This lasagna pan that they've been growing it in has gotten bigger and bigger over the course of the episode until it's like It's like people shaped It's like conveniently growing into the shape of a people and he he's like, yeah, this is just a clone of Ibadon. When you're making a clone person in a lasagne pan, Ben, you're going to want to keep those edge pieces for yourself. Oh, yeah. That's the best part.

Yeah. It gets all crispy and caramelized over there. Yeah. So, yeah, the guy that they found dead in the Hollow Suite was not Ibadon, but a clone of Ibadon. And so this is discovered in Odo's presence and he's like, I think I know where the real Ibadon is. And that is a smash cut to the purple-hooded old man that we've kept seeing the camera pan

to with ominous music throughout the episode, showing up back at Ebid on sweet and Odo confronting him and then like wrestling him and pulling the mission impossible mask off of him, revealing him to in fact not being old at all, but the original Ebid on and Odo says, killing a clone is still murder. Odo pulls off this guy's purple hood

like a guy giving a circumcision. Hahahaha. Odo has moil. Totally scubi-duzum. Ben, how about Star Trek introducing the idea of clones into this universe? And just then sort of not treating it like the massive like story bomb that it is like Star Wars treats a clone story as an entire universe and in

Star Trek this is like a 40 minute episode. Yeah. It's amazing. Well you know I think it could be debated whether this is way better or vastly better than that fucking Star Wars movie. Yeah, and that's true. So the button on the episode is Kiko has gone around and convinced all of the folks on the station, or at least four of the folks on the station to put their kids in her new school. And Jake shows up and then Nog shows up with his dad, Rom. And Rom is like just as against Jake and Nog's friendship as Cisco is, which is a funny thing for Rom and Cisco to have in common. And the class begins and Kiko has outsmarted Starfleet. You just can't try to keep two friends apart like this, Ben.

It's not gonna work. No, it's never gonna work. That's how you get people making podcasts together. Did you like this episode, Adam? There's sort of a lot going on in this episode. Like more than I... There's like three episodes lot going on in this episode. Like more than I- That's like three episodes. It really is.

There's a story density to it that is fairly impressive. I'm not sure if any of the story is interesting enough on its own though. Like you could argue, like, well, take one of the stories out and develop the others a little more fully. And I'm not sure that would be more satisfying than what we got. It's sort of like a seven-layer dip where five of the layers are refried beans. So no, I don't think I like the episode. How about you, Ben? I feel like the first half of this episode is so strong and interesting. And it's so Star Trek is a place in such a fun way.

And I think it really goes off the rails for me the second they pan over to old man in purple hood. Right, the uncircumcised. It just stops feeling like there's anything, you know, it's like, okay, I wonder who the fucking bad guy is gonna be, you idiots. Yeah. Yeah. You know, you might as well be holding up a bug's bunny sign

that says, ain't I a stinker? Like, we know that this isn't possible because we know she is a fixture on the show in seasons to come, but this episode maybe think about how rarely Star Trek depicts an adult breakup, you know, like that actually ends. Like we see a lot of failed dates with Jordy specifically where like, where like, you know, one person likes another, but that interest is not returned.

And so like the relationship never gets off the launch pad. That happens all the time. But we, what we rarely ever see is like two people that just don't work and they don't work it out and then they realize that and then they, and then they decide to separate. And it made me wonder seeing O'Brien and Kiko together in this episode.

If that would have been an interesting way to do it. Like they have a kid. What if they got a divorce? How does that work on a station? Like, would Kiko remain on the station because of the kid? Would Kiko try to take the kid with her? Like, how do politics like that work in this, in this future? So, I don't know.

And like, this is the series that is willing to have characters with damage to their person. And like having that really go badly for O'Brien, I feel like would have been an interesting thing to explore for their writers. Yeah, and I mean, we'll find out how this whole school thing works, but like I think the problems that they're having are not a school away from a solution. Yeah, I mean, the streets that Odo could have written on his blog about how unfair the laws are for men when you break up and there's a kid involved. The red bucket. break up and there's a kid involved. The red bucket. I'm gonna get some letters.

Speaking of letters, Ben, do we have any priority one messages? Oh, we sure do Adam. You snuck an episode title in there Ben, don't think I didn't notice that. Priority one message from Starfleet coming in on Secured Channel. Need a supplement, Link? supplement, Link? supplement supplement

Yes, extra How do you interest alone? Could be enough to buy this ship! Adam, we have a couple of friarity one messages here. The first one is from Lena Con. And it is for Mark Engelberg. It goes like this. Dear Mark Plant, happy birthday. Love, Lena, the coninator.

That is an almost razz and or pleveem like efficiency of language in a priority one message. Happy birthday, Mark. Mark Plant. Mark Plant. I wonder what Kaka would have to say about? Mark plant. Wonder what Kiko would have to say about a Mark plant. I guess nothing now that she's left her career in botany. Well, I mean, one thing that Kiko packed in, in her move to the station was about 40 bonsai plants.

Hahaha. Jesus, Kiko. She's sort of a lot of bonsai plants. Well, some of those bonsai plants live to be hundreds of years old. It's not so much a possession as a responsibility, I feel like. Yeah. You know, one thing in Kiko's life that could use a little bit of trimming is O'Brien's hair, which is maybe a level of poof that we haven't seen up to now.

Yeah. Get those little scissors out, Kiko. Yeah, give him a Brian a 4-hour haircut. Ben, our second priority one message is from Plevim. It is for Sam, Razz, L, Kimberly, Josh, AJ, Michael, Amy, Brittany, the GOOCH, Jason, and other Sam. Message goes like this, fuck you guys. Fuck all of you! Especially trigger, he's the worst of a lot of you. Anna, I'm sorry I forgot your message, but I'm drunk in a public park in Milwaukee.

They serve beer here! And I'm pooping now, six exclamation points. I love Canada, and both kinds of beans. I serve beer here! And I'm pooping now, six exclamation points. I love Canada, and both kinds of beans. What kinds of beans? Like black beans and pinto beans? I love the, and both kinds of beans had no period. Like, that is a, that is very typical of a drunk message. He used up all the characters on those exclamation points

when he said he was pooping. Yeah, you take out one on those exclamation points when he said he was pooping. Yeah, you take out one of those exclamation points, redirected into a period and you have a proper sentence, Pluvim, but he's too drunk for that. Too poopy. I doubt this is the first priority on message that we've gotten that was sent from somebody pooping. Oh yeah. But this is the first one that we've gotten from somebody that admitted that they were pooping Well, hopefully it's the first of many Ben first of many priority one messages you can Create one of your own to go to maximumfund.org slash jumbo tron where personal messages are one hundred dollars and commercial messages are two hundred dollars They're a great way To keep us going in the production of this program. Thanks guys.

Hey Adam. What's that been? Did you find yourself a drunk Shimoda? I think in this episode it could only be best year Who continues his long march into embarrassment by continuing. So into self parity. Yeah, into, he keeps walking into a wall with Dax. Over and over again, he's like a wind up toy

that has scooted across the floor and is just like banging into a wall, backing up and then banging into a wall. Dax, being pretty cool with them up until now, but I'm wondering if there's gonna be a moment where Dax, being pretty cool with them up until now, but I'm wondering if there's going to be a moment where Dax is pushed to finally go like, fuck off, man, like, stop being weird. This isn't going to happen. You got to read the signs.

Yeah. Weird that's Bishir and Cisco get a little moment to talk over their shared discomfort with Dax. What does Cisco fucked up about? Cisco doesn't also have a sexual component to his grieving process over his friend, and yet they're both brought together by just an overarching discomfort with how to treat Dax. In a weird way, to me, they don't share any currency about this at all. Like their currency isn't to like whatsoever. And yet they're brought together at the same lunch table to sort of share this thing. I don't know.

It's clear that Cisco is like not quite clear how much, how personal to get with Bishier. Yeah, this is a conversation Picard would never have with anyone in any season. Picard would never tip toe up to the line though, as Cisco does. Yeah. Yeah. He'd stay well back. Yeah, what about you, Ben? My drug-chimota is the angry mob that shows up to try to break into Odo's office. Never has an angry mob collectively seen reason so quickly. Yeah. Like Cisco shows up and like puts his hand up and he's like, Hey, you guys don't want justice. This is all about Rewangay. This is all about Omerta. And what I'm here to say to you is let the process proceed and you'll all get satisfying results when we find out

what's really going on and they're like, oh, that seems pretty reasonable. All right, well, uh, Mabah Jernd. Who wants to help scrub down the inside of this office? You barnaby, barnaby looking guy, you want to help? Don't you? Are there barnaby looking guy you in? Don't grab that bucket, that's the wrong bucket. Use this bucket. Don't the wrong bucket use this bucket

Don't stick them up in that it'll it'll fight back Greatest gen live show is something you don't want to miss why? Well, it's a great opportunity to see me and Ben in person, but that's not all. FOD is from all over, gather at these shows to cosplay, to do pre and post-show hangs, to make friends, and share their embarrassment. Hey, let's make a pretty great name for a tour. Let's do it! The Share Your Embarrassment Tour is coming in August 2023, and we've got a bunch of dates in a lot of great places.

Go to GreatestGenTour.com to get more info. That's GreatestGenTour.com for dates and ticketing information for the Share Your Embarrassment Tour. I'm Jordan Morris and I'm Jesse Thorne. On Jordan Jesse Go, we make pure, delightful nonsense. We were open awesome guests and bring them down to our level. We got stupid with Judy Greer. My friend Molly and I call it having the spaceweirds.

Pat Noswald. Could I get a ball-rock burger and some air-gorn fries? Thank you. And Kumail Nanjiani. I've come back with cat toothbrushes, which is impossible to use. Come get stupider with us at MaximumFun.org. Look, your podcast apps are already open. Just pull it out.

Give Jordan Jesse Goatry. Being smart is hard. Be dumb instead. Oh, rats, hey, hey, hey, oh, I'm glad I found you in line. These clouds are really freaking me out. I hate having to stand in line and, boy, what do I? These giraffes do not smell good. No, they do not, and they've such short nacks.

But I'm hearing we need to get on this off. We get on the art. Yeah, it's about terrain. Got us about to destroy humanity Hey, oh, sorry, sorry, are you Noah? Yeah, I know we look like humans. We're actually we're podcasters We are podcasters, so it's different. Have you heard of Ono Ross and Kerry? We investigate spirituality claims of the paranormal stuff like that And you have a boat and say the world's gonna end, so seem like something for us to check out. We would love to be on the boats. We came two by two. What do you think?

Ona Ross & Kerry, available on MaximumFun.org. [♪ Music playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing in background, playing episode is season one episode for Bable, a deadly virus sweeps over Deep Space Nine, and it's up to Kira to find an antidote. Sounds like an episode of the classic 1990s dust and Hoffman film outbreak, send space. What you want to do is put Bashir and charge of a murder investigation and Kira involved in some sort of medical investigation. OK.

I guess that's what's coming up next time, Ben. It is. What's coming up now is people going in droves to talk over this episode and other episodes on all of our different social media outlets. You've got your subreddit, you've got your Facebook group and page, you've got your hashtag greatest gen on Twitter where Adam is at Cut for Time and I'm at BenjaminRAHR. The show is made possible by the generous support of our listeners. If you're interested in supporting, it's ongoing production. You can go to maximumfund.org slash donate. Yeah, we really appreciate everybody that does that.

You know, it's no secret that I'm in the moving process right now and as a freelancer that has made it a little bit scary but it's been a lot easier because I know that I have like a small amount of stability in my life because people value this show and donate to support it. It's been on my mind a lot lately, like how lucky we are to have viewers that are that generous with their support of the program. Well, I think one of the big reasons this show

is as good, quote unquote, as it is, at least production wise, is because we treat it like a job. And this support for the show is a big reason why we're able to do that. So thanks for that. Thank you. We should thank Direct Material for our theme music and Adam Ragusia for a lot of the other music you hear on the program. And with that, we hope you join us next time for another great episode of Star Trek Deuce Base 9 and an episode of the greatest generation that is a real bad case of the word salads.

I think they're gonna make it sound. Make it sound. Make it sound. Make it sound. Make it sound. Yor-be-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat-cat- thinking of a different Schwarzenegger movie. Yeah, the sixth day was the one with the devil, right? No, it's got Steve's on, I think, and it's all about cloning. Oh, maybe not. Oh, not Steve's on.

Michael Rappaport, isn't it? Oh, boy, there are two people insulted by that. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha. The line that I remember vividly from that, I kind of wished was in this, which is in the big, like, final action scene where Schwarzenegger is confronting the evil industrialist who's been cloning people the entire time. Schwarzenegger goes, why don't you clone yourself where you're still alive so you can go fuck

yourself? Why don't you clone yourself where you're still alive so you can go fuck yourself It's one of the most tortured action star Quotables of all time that That trailer line has maybe six too many words in it like they did quite edit that down into something that works They're like I know what we need to get to get across, but I don't know how to get there. Maybe if he just says all of the words, we can cut to over his shoulder and we can just sort of edit the dialogue down later on to a reaction shot. Yeah. Maximumfund.org Comedy and Culture, Artists Don't Listen or Supported