The Harland Highway - 400 WOW 400 we celebrate with Timmy the campfire boy and my boss Mr. Featherstone.

Episode Date: May 22, 2012

Unbelievable! 400 episodes of The Harland Highway! Thanks to all you Pavement Pounders for being here. We celebrate in Mr. Featherstones office right out of the gate. What could go wrong? Right? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Holy jumping crayfish. And I don't even know if crayfish can jump. Ladies and Gagurgle Flurgens, what a treat. Special podcast today. Special. I think you might know if you've been following the podcast, if you're a pavement ponder. I think you know this is a big day. I won't give it away right here on the intro. I'm doing everything I can do to contain myself. but we are going to be talking about this special day and amongst some other things I've apparently got a call in from my boss upstairs which I think is in reference to this special day I'm not giving it away but I will be visiting with my boss Mr. Featherstone which should be very rewarding we're going to touch on a few topics like morning fuel what gets your engine started in the morning and I mean you personally not

not your car. And then are you one of these people that like challenges, personal human challenges, like climbing Mount Everest? Is this a smart thing to do to climb Mount Everest? I don't know. But that and other surprises here on this special episode of the Harlan Highway. I'll let the intro play and then we're going to get right into it. So put on your safety helmets.

Your welding goggles. Here we go. It's the Harland Highway. Welcome to the Harland Highway. All right. Let's get this sucker going, huh? You are causing a major disturbance on my time. It's the Harland Highway.

What's up, Brock? If I'm here and you're here, doesn't that make it our time? I have come here to chew bubble gun and kick ass. Am I hallucinating here? Just what in the hell do you think you are doing? You just made a wrong turn. On to the Harland Highway. This is your fucking wake-up call, man.

You're riding down the Harland Highway with Harland Williams. In 30 seconds, you'll be dead. Then I'll blow this place up and be home in time for cornflakes. Oh, yeah. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Listen to that. Listen to that music.

Oh. Oh man, you know what, folks, welcome to, I can barely say it. I can barely contain my energy, my enthusiasm, my excitement, episode 400 of the Harlan Highway. La la, la. Oh, my God. I can't believe it's been 400, unbelievable episode. and they're just going to keep coming, and what? What do you mean? He wants to see me. I'm in the middle of a celebration.

This is number 400. You don't have to snap at me? He wants me up there right now? Yes. Oh, for God. Well, wait a minute. Why am I? He's probably, just so you folks know what's going on.

He just held up a sign through the production window here. I guess my boss, Mr. Featherstone, wants to see me up in his office, ASAP. And right away, I was like, I never really have a good time up there. But then, wait a minute, this is my 400th episode. What do you think, Roger, maybe like a raise or something? I don't know. Huh? I don't know.

A present? I don't know. Can you imagine, like, a jaguar, a new car or something? This is great. All right, folks, I got to step away from a don't. Don't leave your podcast device. Okay, this is episode 400. What a celebration.

I have to step away just for a minute. I have to go upstairs to the big guy's office. My boss, the guy who funds and operates this whole operation, the guy I have to answer to. But I'm guessing he's got a bottle of champagne or something to help with the celebration. I'm going upstairs to my boss, Mr. Featherstone's office. And then we'll be right back after that to keep the celebration going on the 400th episode of the Harland Highway. Well, here I am.

I'm outside my boss's office, Mr. Featherstone. This is unbelievable. He usually only calls me up here when there's truck. but this being our fourth hundredth episode 400 you just got to know that it's got to be some kind of congratulatory get-together I can almost hear the bubbly being poured right now oh wait me here comes the secretary I'm going in I'm going in uh hello hello sir hello mr featherstone sir yeah hello how you doing there howling howling that's what i said howling no harland sir what harland harland how how how how how harland sir howland yeah harland williams sir the harland highway

yeah you called me up here sir yeah sit out i need to talk to you i bet you do what's that grin on your face well i think you know sir i know why i'm here oh you do do you what are you some kind of ESPN mind reader uh sorry i asked you if you were an ESPN mind reader yes sir that ESPN is a sports station oh okay so now you're uh a diagnostic a what You're doing diagnostics all of a sudden. Sir, I know your shtick. Where is it? Where's what?

The champagne, sir. Champagne? The celebratory champagne. Are you thinking I invited you up here to my office on the top floor with the view of the city so I could pour you some of your fancy dandy ponder drinks that you drink, that you drink downtown with your guy friends? Excuse me? The fancy lady drinks you drink downtown with your guy friends

at those funny little bars like the sandman and the burnt olive? What? The sandman and the burnt olive? Uh-huh. What do you mean my guy friends? Oh, uh-huh. What? Uh-huh. Sir, I thought you were having me up here because we did 400 podcasts.

How many? 400, sir. It's a landmark. It's a milestone. I'll tell you what it is. It's 400 episodes of rotten, stinking compost heap garbage. That's what it is. Now, wait a minute, so you're joking, right?

Does this old wrinkled face look like it's joking? Huh? Have you ever seen an apple doll face like? this joking well no you're not known for your sense of humor sir excuse me i mean what does that mean wise guy so suddenly you're uh charlie the tuna the the tuna the tuna the chicken of the sea what yeah now listen here sir 400 episodes is i don't know that many other i don't interrupt me what i'm about to say something well what are you going to say so Sir? I don't remember.

Well, sir, then technically I didn't interrupt anything. Oh, I remembered. Okay. You ever fought on an ATM machine? What? I said, did you ever fart on an ATM machine right in that little slot where the money comes out? Sir, is this some kind of a gag? I'll tell you what's a gag.

When I listen to your podcast, I gag. I lean over the toilet. And I gag. Sir, you can't say that to a guy who's done 400 premium episodes. Oh, can't I? How about this? Blah, blah! Sir!

Yeah, that's me puking up over the toilet. You know what I'm puking up? Sir. I'm puking up your podcast. Your podcast looks like a mixture of Campbell's Hungry Man, cream of corn syrup. soup mixed in with a mushroom omelette and some carrot stew oh god sir yeah i don't know if i want to continue funding this howley's highway or whatever the hell it is it's the harland highway sir

and it's doing well thank you very much i'm very proud of it oh you're proud are you yes i'm proud Does that mean you have pride? Yes, I have a lot of pride. Well, why don't you go marching in that pride parade with your funny little guy, friends? Sir! It's not that kind of pride. Oh, I'm sure it is. Down at your funny little bars there downtown?

I don't go to the funny little bars downtown. Yeah, like the chainsaw? I don't go to the chainsaw. Happy hour nine to five at the chain. sir how about the rusty sideburns i don't go to the rusty what am i doing here i'm telling you i'm can in your podcast you're joking no i'm not do i look like i'm joking by the way you have a fart inside a bag of sour cream and onion chips no how about inside a can of pringles you have a fad inside a can of pringles you have a

Fahd inside a can of Bringles, you put the lid back on. Sir, I'm concerned about you're canceling my podcast. I'm here to celebrate and you're here. Don't you get... Hang on. Oh, geez, I got to take this call. Get the hell out of here. Wait a minute. You just said you're canceling my podcast.

Get out of here. You can't tell me you're canceling my podcast and then just leave me hang. I said, get out of here. I got to take this call. We'll talk about this later. Unbelievable. Get out of here. By the way, you ever fought on a box of chocolate milk?

I love coffee. I love tea. I love the job. What do you use in the morning to get your engine running? And I don't mean your car, baby. I mean you. You're one of these people that wakes up and you got to have your coffee. You're a zombie until you've poured Starbucks. into your eye socket.

Yeah! Hey man, I'm awake. What's up? Uh, dude, your eyes are bleeding. Yeah, it's okay, man. It's decaf. I mean, holy God. How about are you one of these people

that jumps up and you need like a smoothie? Hang on, hon. I can't talk yet. Now, don't even talk to me till I've had my smoothie. Or do you drink a Coke in the morning, man? That's what I do. Forget the coffee and the smoothies.

Or the freshly ground orange juice. No, man, I don't do any of that. I'm a Coke, man. I drink Coke. Coca-Cola, Coca-Cola, things go better with Coca-Cola. Oh, that's stuff. If there's anything in your system, it just burns it. You ever hear that old saying you drop a nail and a Coke and it eats it in two days?

I purposely eat nails when I wake up in the morning. I eat a bag of nails just so I can drink a Coke and melt them down. Talk about getting some iron in my diet. Hello! Coke, man. Boing! I'm like the roadrunner. I go from being Eeyore from Winnie the Pooh.

Thanks for noticing me. Crank down a jar of Coke. Yeah, that's right. drink it out of a jar. Because I roll like that player. Crank down my jar of coke and Beem, beep, meep, meep. That coyote's after you.

Well, good luck. I just drank a big jug of Coke. You'll never catch me, you hairy freak. Beemep. And I'm telling you, he said he's canceling the podcast. I don't think he did. think he said that well I was there don't tell me he didn't say it harlan what I don't think he I don't think he meant what he said listen you're my

agent okay and if you're not going to stand behind me then I'm right here I'm standing behind you okay if you need me to go up and talk to Featherstone. I'm going to go up and talk to him. Yes, I want you to. This was supposed to be a day of celebration, 400 episodes, and he drops a bombshell on me

that he's canceling the show, the podcast. And he doesn't even know my name. He doesn't even know the name of the podcast. All right, let's calm down. But I... Let's bring me. Breathe. Let's count backwards. Five, four, three, two, one.

Come on, man. Stop the breathing exercises. I'm upset about this, man. I understand. But listen, the last thing they're going to do is, cancel someone like you. I mean, they need the content. Okay? They need someone who's funny. They need someone who's approachable.

They need someone who has the ability to, you know, gather an audience. Okay, thank you. And you believe that I can do all those things. I'm sorry, what? You believe all those. Those nice things you just said, you, you, like, you stand behind that. David?

David! What, what? What are you doing? I, I, I, I just had a rough night last night. What? What do you mean you had a rough night last night? I'm, you're my agent. I'm standing here telling you he's about to cancel my podcast.

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had to tell you, you know I've never liked the color blue. What has this got? Let me finish. What has this got to do? Let me finish. I've never liked the color blue. Okay. I popped into the mail room

downstairs, and David Smith is wearing get this navy blue pants Dickies which I like the name and a blue matching

I don't know if it's a mailroom issue shirt, college shirt or what but unbelievable it just hit me like somehow blue is David Smith's color I'll tell you what why don't you go down and represent David Smith

and I'll get a new agent Okay, you're overreacting. Then get out of here and go talk to Featherstone and clear this stuff up. I can't have my listeners on my 400th episode and we hear from the boss that it's going to be canned. Okay, I get it. Here's what I'm going to do, okay? Yes, what? I'm going to, as your agent,

yes go upstairs okay and talk to mr featherstone how about that isn't that what i asked you to do right at the beginning i don't think i heard that oh you didn't hear that listen harland i'm your agent Okay, I come up with ideas I come up with creative ways To keep you working Yes, just go Boy, oh boy Sleazy

Excuse me Just go and talk to them God Okay, I'm on my way I will report back to you in Let's see How about, um, oh boy. How about 30-ish?

What do you mean 30-ish? 30-ish. 30 minutes? Ish. Yes. Go, ish. Get your ass out of here, ish. It's so funny.

That's why I like ripping you. Get out. Go. I've got a podcast to do. I shouldn't be. spending my podcast talking to my agent about whether there's going to be another podcast or not.

Ish. Yes, Ish, get out. I'll be back in an ish. Oh, God. Hello, this is Harlan Williams from high atop Mount Everest, looking down on the Harlan Highway.

Okay, what is what is with these morons that have the need to climb Mount Everest. Is that not just the worst ego trip you've ever seen in your life? It's okay to have a big ego, but when you put your life in danger, for what?

Um, I was higher than you. Yeah, guess what? Yeah, guess what, buddy, back off. She's with me. I was higher than you. Yeah. Oh, yeah, dude? Well, I was in an airplane the other day, and I was like way higher than you, so give me the chick.

I mean, what's the big claim to fame yeah I climbed up some ice and um I got really high I stood up top on the snow and I stood I could look down on the whole planet everyone was beneath me for just I only went up for 10 minutes yeah it took me like a year and a half to to walk up it but that 10 minutes up there I was higher than you yeah yeah what a bunch of idiot you know what I'd like to do I'd like to hide drift. And just when these guys are about to put their foot on the top of Mount Everest, throw a snowball. Bang! Hit them right in the head. Watch them tumble down. There's your ego, baby. Suck on frosty snowballs. You're listening to Harlan Williams. I know it's mean, but keep off

Everest. Keep your ego in your toaster, baby. Put some butter on it and stay warm. Yeah, that's What? What? He wants me. He wants me to go back up? I thought he was canning the podcast. My agent called you and he wants me back up. Featherstone wants me back up in his office.

Okay. Hopefully this is good. All right. Uh, folks. What a day. What a day I'm having here at the Harland Highway. I mean, I think you can hear. what's going on. You can hear the duress in my voice.

I mean, here I was in a celebratory mood. I was excited, and then my boss has me up. I think I'm going to be clinking champagne glasses with him. He threatens to cancel my thing, and my agent comes in here. I was pulling teeth trying to get him go up, but it sounds like, Roger, right? It sounds like my agent was able to. able to get through to this guy, my boss Dr. Featherstone, and what?

They want me up there right now. Okay. Folks, hang on here. Everything's in flux. I'm as confused as you are. It's the 400th episode. It's not going as smoothly as I thought. I do apologize.

Let's pop back up to my boss's office. And for God's sakes, let's hope that he's uh reconsidered and i don't know let let's get up there here we go back to mr featherstone's office roger watch the uh watch the the nest here and don't give me the finger god well here i am back up at mr featherstone's office and i apologize for putting you folks through this but uh i guess my agent wrangled another meeting with them and uh hopefully we're not canceled hopefully that we do another 400 and uh you know i just i can't believe it what a way to spend the 400th episode

i was hoping for bands and singers and special guests oh hold on i'm going in i'm going in uh hello sir mr featherstone hello Uh, thank you for seeing me again, sir. The pleasure's all yours, not mine. Well, sir, come on, get in here. Sir, listen, I, I know, I talk to your age in that fruitcake. Now, sir, let's not, uh, let's not label people. Oh, I'll label people all right.

I'll get a Sharpie, okay? A big black Sharpie. I'll write fruit cake right across his forehead. Now, sir, that's politically incorrect. I'll tell you what's politically incorrect. Barack Obama and Bill Clinton rolling around naked in a pup tent on a camping trip, okay? That's politically incorrect. Sir, what does that even mean?

You don't know what I mean. You've rolled around with enough guys. What? Ah, what are you? Uh-huh. Listen, sir, I didn't come all the way, but you sit down and you shut your grease hole. What is a grease hole? You sit down.

I heard you were whining like a little four-year-old baby who can't get his hands on a lollipop. I wasn't whining like, ah. And no way your agent told me. He said you were whining and jumping up and down and pulling your skirt up. By pulling my skirt up. You know what I mean mesophysically? What is mesophysically, sir? What, you didn't go to school now?

What are you, uh, where do you work at the Pioneer Village, turning butter? What? Listen, I heard you were whining that you said I was gonna cancel your podcast. Well, you said it, sir, not me. Well, heard from your agent and uh we talked about a few things let's put it that way what does that mean let's just say i'm not interested in going through a lawsuit with the likes of you what do you mean i didn't threaten yeah i know you and all your party boys just waiting to slap me with a uh

anti-integration suit. A what? One of them polytechnical anti-inflammation lawsuits. I know how you guys operate and your pride prades. What are you talking about?

I'm not gay, sir. Yeah, onions don't peel up like lepracons. What? Now let's get down to what do you want for me sir all i wanted all i wanted was i wanted to feel some excitement i wanted to have a great 400th episode i wanted to be a party atmosphere i wanted um my the fans the

pavement pounders to to have a great time to help celebrate the milestone of 400 podcasts sir Oh boy Well you just play pin the tail on the honky What You heard me pin the tail on the honky You and your black friends What the hell are you talking about Ah

What Ah Sir Oh just calm down Here's what I'm gonna do But before we get into that You ever fought On a BG's picture

What What? You know the Bee Gees, right? The singers? Yeah, the Beegis Saturday Night fever. Right, and you know the one with the beard on his face? The good-looking one? Not the mutants. The mutants? You know the other ones that looked like they were born out of a rotten zebra's ass. What? The good-looking Beji with the beard.

Yes, I know him. You ever fart on a picture of that guy? fart right into his beard. No, I've never farted onto a BG. All right, well, here's what we're going to do. Okay? I'm going to throw you the best 400th podcast. What do you call it?

A podcast, sir. A prod. A cattle prod. A podcast. Don't raise your voice. I'll take this away as quickly as I give it. You haven't given me anything yet. Oh, I'm throwing you the biggest podcast 400 podcast party of all time.

Big celebration. We're taking you down to Hollywood, and we're doing it in a big studio, and we're going to have cameras and special guests and a bunch of hullabaloo. Are you serious, sir? Yeah, I'm serious. What do you think? I'm the Joker from Batman? Oh, my God.

and we're going to have a special guest come in and sing for you. Really? Who? Timmy the Campfire Kid's going to sing you a happy podcast song. Now, you don't have to do that, sir. Oh, I don't do it. Now you don't want what I'm offering? Yes, sir.

Yeah, no. If Timmy, the Campfire Kid, has to come in, I can live with that. You're damn right. And you're going to do one more thing for me before I throw this giant 400th pot. Podcast shindig for you. Anything, sir. Have you ever farted on a monopoly board?

What? Have you ever pulled down your pants and farted on a monopoly board and blown all the little houses and hotels down the street? Sir, I, what are you... Well, you're going to do it for me. No, I'm not doing that, sir. Well, there's no big, how do you do 400. Oh, come on You're going to fart all over a monopoly board

On no big shindig All right, I'll do it When and where Right now You see that monopoly board on my desk? Yes, sir Pull them down and fart on it Sir, there's a picture of your wife and family right there

Well, get going before I make you fart on them too Oh, God. Come on, hurry up. I ain't got all day. Oh, my God. Take them off and fought all over the Monopoly board. Yes, sir. That's it.

Get them off. Do you have to look, sir? Yeah, I do. God. All right, let it rip. I'm trying. Come on, crank it out. I'm trying.

sir come on rip van winkle oh oh oh oh oh oh oh it stings oh my god that reeks what did you eat a a fucking onion burger with a fucking uh an eskimo on it god sir this is humiliating yeah well you won't think so when you have your party now oh there goes my phone get the hell out of here Thank you. I got to get this call. Get out of here. That's the facility call. We're setting up your big shindig and your 400th at the big, how do you do? Thank you, sir. Get the hell out of you.

Pull up your pants, for God's sake. Sorry, sir. Thank you. Thank you, Mr. Featherstone. Get out of here. Thank you, sir. Well, it certainly has been an interesting podcast thus far. Um, you know, a couple of run-ins with my boss, Mr. Featherstone.

And, uh, it sounds like something's in the works for number 400. And, uh, I mean, it's just been, uh, hang on. Roger, who's, is someone here? Who is it? Let him in. Let, come on in. Hi, how's it going? Oh, God. Don't give me your attitude.

What do you mean? Don't give me my attitude. You heard me. What are you doing here, kid? I think you know. Mr. Featherstone told me to come in and sing you a song for your 400th podcast. Oh, God, you're... I didn't think, yeah, you're right.

Woody, don't be so bummed out. God, you look like you just saw a ghost. Well, it's just I'm not convinced you're the best singer, and I don't know that you really do campfire songs and oh okay so now you're going to uh cut me down like a timber cut you down like a timber yeah that's right words hurt mister all right i'm not trying to hurt you kid too late i'm bleeding all over the place i'm hurt real deep ass face don't start calling me names Well, now you know, words hurt. Okay, I get it, words heard.

Crunchy granola cereal ass face? Don't call me crunchy granola cereal ass face. How about chocolate pudding, diarrhea face? Don't call me chocolate pudding to just sing your goofy songs. Okay. I'm going to start with a couple of campfire songs. and one campfire song and one 400th podcast song. Here we go, ready?

Yes, I'm ready. Okay, here's the campfire song. First, and this one's really fun, because it's about the Northern Lights. Okay, the Northern Lights. Just do it. All right. Puff-Ader face?

Puff-Ather face. A puff at her is a snake. What does that got to do with my face? Are you going to let me sing? Yes, sing, hurry up, and get the hell out of here. Shut up! Oh, Northern Lights! I love the Northern Lights!

They shine so very bright in the night sky! Northern lines! Oh, Northern Lights! They're not in the south or the west or the east. They're in the north, because they're northern law! Cut it out! Ah! Stop!

Are you done? Yes! Okay. God, that was horrific. My ears hurt. Do you want your 400th podcast song? Oh, do we have to? Oh, okay.

More hurtful words. Catfish. Clit. Catfish Clit. Sing your stupid song. Sing your 400 song. Here I go. Oh, his name is

Harlan Williams. He's on the Harlan Highway. He's done 400 podcasts. And they're all really funny and good. Oh, it's the Harlan Highway. And it's really good. And you smell like garbage? Okay.

How did I know that was coming? Well, you do. Shut up. I don't smell like garbage. Are you done? I have one more song. I always do three. Well, then hurry up, man.

Oh, I got a man. What? I got a man. What's your man got to do with me? I'm not trying to hear that, see? What? That's my song! Here we go!

What's your man got to do with me? I got a name. I'm not trying to hear that sea. I'm not trying to hear that sea. I'm not trying to hear that sea. What's your man got to do with me? Oh, I'm not trying to hear that. See?

All right. That is not a campfire song, kid. That is like a goofy. What are you singing about a man for? What's your man got to do with me? I got a man. I'm not trying to hear that, see? I'm not trying to listen, see.

I'm not trying to hear that, see? Cut it out. What's the matter with you, man? I got a man. What's your man? I'm not trying to hear that, see? God, cut it out, stop. What is wrong with you?

What's your man got to do with me? I got a man. I got a man. I'm not trying to hear that. See, what's your man got to do with me? I'm not trying to hear that. Get out of here. I'm not finished. Get the hell out of here.

What in the name of God is wrong with you, man? Oh, I got a man. What's your man get out? What's your man got to do with me? Get out. God. Unreal. Maybe I'm happy there's 400 podcasts after that? Anyways, it sounds like

it sounds like we might be gearing up to do a legitimate 400th podcast is what was where I'm going with this. It sounds like Featherstone is planning something, so keep listening, keep your ear to the highway, and hopefully, you know, this wasn't the greatest 400th episode, thanks to all the drama and that idiot kid.

I heard that garbage bag face. Get out of here! Timmy? Timmy in his campfire song. up yours get out so let's just see what happens maybe there'll be a special event podcast that we sneak in here amongst the other ones i don't know i'm going to wait for all the instructions to come down from upstairs and then and stay tuned and in the meantime uh if you are in the Chicago area. Yes, here come the announcements.

If you were in Chicago, let's say, May 31st through June 3rd, you can catch me at the Schaumburg Improv, which is just outside of Chicago. And sooner than that, if you want to see me in Los Angeles, Hollywood Los Angeles, I'm going to be doing this really weird show this Saturday. May 26 And it's called The Upright Citizens Comedy Brigade or something like that

It's on Franklin Avenue in Hollywood And it's a show called The Set List And how it works is They get like five or six comedians Me Being One of them And they bring us out on stage one at a time And they don't give us the topics Until we're right in front of the crowd

So we're not allowed to do any of our pre-planned material. We're not allowed to do any old material. We have to come up with the material right on the spot based on the topics that they give us at this show. So it's very challenging, it's very unpredictable, it's very fun, and it's kind of in my wheelhouse because, as you know, I like to make stuff up on the fly. So if you're around, I think it's at 7 or 8,

clock the upright citizens comedy brigade it's a small little theater on franklin and come check it out and then chicago uh the improv uh may 31st through uh june 3rd and then the following week i'm off to florida yes indeed june 7th to june 10th laying it down in tampa at the improv so uh really good stuff coming up and uh let's see what happens with the podcast here and uh if you want to call you know the number three two three seven three nine forty three thirty thirty or you can write me at harland williams dot com and also check into the harland williams dot com merchandise store i think we have some new t-shirts up brand new t-shirts right off the press and those usually go pretty fast.

They're my hand-drawn t-shirts that I draw right on the shirt and they don't stick around long. So get in there and I only do a few runs a year on those and see if there's something you might like. And don't forget, you can download Fudgy Wudgey Fudge Face, my feature film that I wrote and directed at Amazon.com. You can purchase it for a few bucks. or you can rent it for a few bucks.

But check it out if you like weird, strange movies about aliens and hillbillies. Wow. All right. Well, the show went a little longer today due to the festivities or lack thereof for number 400. Hey, what can I say, folks? Thank you for driving along on the highway with me. I ran into a bunch of people in Utah and Salt Lake City, Utah last week

and some unbelievable pavement pounders. Some people came up to me after the show and they were just talking about some of the characters they liked and they love it when George Michael calls in. And a number of folks just really talking to me about how much they enjoy the show. To all of you, Salt Lake City and across the planet. Thank you so much.

Let's see if we can squeeze another 400 in. And we'll just keep on rolling down the Harland Highway. And until next time, my furry little friends, chicken. Chalmain, baby. I got a man! Shut up! Thank you.