The Harland Highway - 467: BEYONCEE at the SuperBowl, Madonna vs Gaga
Episode Date: February 7, 2013BEYONCEE at the SuperBowl, Madonna vs Gaga are they too close? And a giant monster has been found under the sea, for real. Bundle up your brace face!!! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megapho...ne.fm/adchoices See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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Release the Cracken.
Oh, yeah.
Mm-hmm.
We're releasing the Crackin.
Yeah, we're talking about giants on today's podcast.
Hi, I'm Harlan Williams.
I'm a giant.
And you are on the Harland Highway, the never-ending highway.
So that makes it a giant highway.
But we're going to be talking about different types of giants.
We're going to be talking about giants in the entertainment industry like Beyonce.
Did you see her on the Super Bowl?
Gotta talk about Beyonce.
And then something amazing.
They found a giant at the bottom of the sea.
This is very exciting.
This is real live documentation of a mythical creature
that's finally been filmed and fascinating stuff.
A little scary, a little nervous for the outcome.
But we'll get into that as we keep on rolling down the highway.
And then we're going to have two more giants in the entertainment industry.
Madonna versus Lady Gaga.
I recently went to see Lady Gaga, and I walked away feeling like she was ripping Madonna off a little bit.
We're going to get into it.
We're going to play some back-to-back songs.
You be the judge.
Oh, it's going to be good.
Right here on the Harland Highway.
Welcome to the Harland Highway
All right, let's get this sucker going, huh?
You are causing a major disturbance on my time.
It's the Harland Highway.
What's up, Brock?
If I'm here and you're here,
doesn't that make it our time?
I have come here to chew bubble gum and kick ass.
Am I hallucinating here?
Just what in the hell do you think you're doing?
You just made a wrong turn.
On to the Harland Highway.
This is your fucking wake-up call.
You're riding down the Harland Highway with Harland Williams.
In 30 seconds, you'll be dead.
I'll blow this place up and be home in time for cornflakes.
It's one of the most mysterious creatures on the planet,
but perhaps not for much longer.
Filmmakers have released video footage of a giant squid
in its natural deep sea habitat,
something that's never been done before.
The video was shot last July.
near Ogasawara Islands off Japan.
It was done for a documentary produced by NHK and the Discovery Channel.
The animal the crew caught on camera was three meters long,
and it's easy to see why the giant squid inspired the myth of the Krakken.
Release the Krakken!
Oh yeah, they found it, ladies and Gennertl Flurdens.
They found the giant squid.
finally after all these years did you did you watch it did you see it on the
discovery channel release the cracker no oh yeah they found it way way down at the
bottom of the ocean uh i don't know if you saw this thing on the discovery channel pretty
fascinating. The giant squid has been more
elusive than Willie Nelson's dental flaws.
There's been
myths about this creature. There's been
rumors about this creature. And if you're wondering what it is, it's a
squid. You've all seen a squid. You've all eaten calumari.
But this is a giant squid. And there have been
reports through history of, you know, squid as long as over 175 feet long.
And scientists have a feeling that they could be even longer, maybe over 200, maybe 300 feet.
I don't know.
But because they haven't been able to find any, they haven't been able to study them,
they don't know a lot about them.
Now, when I say they haven't found any, I mean alive.
They have found carcasses washed up on beaches,
and they've found pieces of giant squid caught in fishing lines and fishing nets.
But no one has ever seen one alive or filmed one alive.
And so this is a fascinating special on Discovery Channel.
If you get a chance, you know, DVR it and watch the footage,
because it's really interesting to, it's almost like someone,
saying, oh, they've never caught a big foot on film
or the Lochness monster or aliens.
But this is a real live creature
that dwells in the deepest parts of the ocean.
And they finally sent a research team
went out and finally caught footage
of this thing swimming in its natural environment.
And what they did is they dropped a robotic camera
down to the bottom of the...
ocean off the coast of Japan very very deep part of the ocean and um they put some colored lights
on the camera and they they figured out the pattern there's a a type of luminescent jellyfish
that lives very deep down and when it's being attacked it actually lights up it does a
light show and uh it's an amazing uh survival mechanism that it has
has, it does this light show hoping to attract a bigger predator to the one that's attacking
it.
So in other words, it's doing the light show hoping that while it's being attacked, its
colorful lights will bring in a bigger predator to attack the thing that's attacking it.
It's ingenious.
And so one of the scientists was able to duplicate this light display that these jellyfish put on
and she had a theory that, hey, if I imitate the light show,
a giant squid would come flying in thinking a predator is eating a jellyfish
and claim the predator as its meal.
So she dropped this thing down.
They left it down there for like three or four days.
And sure enough, they got footage of it of the giant squid, which was one thing.
But then even better, if you watch the special,
some scientists go down in a submersible,
a little mini submarine,
and they go way, way, way, way down,
and they have some bait hanging out in the water,
and sure enough,
the elusive mythical giant squid shows up.
And it's pretty exciting, man.
I don't know how excited you get by seafood.
But it's quite fascinating to lay eyes on something
that no one has really laid eyes on before.
And to give you some perspective on the size of these squid and the power
and, you know, the strength that they have,
these squid do battle with whales.
They actually fight it out with sperm whales.
I guess sperm whales attacked them.
And, I mean, imagine something that has the girth and the tenacity
and the size to do battle with a full-grown sperm whale.
So that's pretty cool, man.
Now, here's the downer part that I don't like, okay?
Here's where, unfortunately, due to the greediness of mankind,
I have to turn a positive into a negative.
My big worry now is that they've proven they're there,
they've figured out how to reach them,
they've figured out how to kind of attract them
now my question is how soon do the greedy fishermen start
violating and exploiting these magnificent creatures
so that they can be sold as calamari
at a seafood restaurant
and for those of you that don't think it'll happen believe me it will
it's very sad it's sad whenever anything gets exposed
to mankind.
There's those of us that are just like, wow, what a fascinating discovery.
I wonder what we can learn from this.
And then there's the other half of society that goes, wow, finally somebody's going to show me
where this species of animal is so I can plunder them and kill them
and chop them up and harvest them and feed them to humans or skin them or do whatever you do
to make a God-forsaken dollar.
And that's where I'm really nervous.
That's where I'm like, maybe it was better we didn't find them.
Because now that they found them, they proved they're there.
They kind of figured out a method.
You know, there's probably guys out there right now,
like Japanese fishermen, Norwegian fishermen, American fishermen.
I don't know who.
People down there jigging for giant squid,
and how long until they're on the endangered species list,
how long until the balance of the ocean is out of whack?
It terrifies me.
So in a way, I'm happy,
and in a way, I'm very sad that they found this thing.
To give you an example, I was watching a nature show a couple of months ago,
and there was this guy that had dedicated his life to sharks.
He just loved sharks, and this guy would go and dive down.
He'd swim with them.
He had no fear of sharks.
He'd been studying them, doing all kinds of research, studying their habits, studying their mating rituals,
finding out where they lay their eggs, et cetera, et cetera.
Real passion for sharks.
And he stumbles on this place in the ocean.
I forget where it is.
But somehow erosion and the constant hammering of the tides and the waves and the currents had somehow carved out what almost looked like a giant clay bowl.
okay about half the length of a football field
and it had carved out into the rock and the gravel and the sand
it almost looked like a big clay bowl it looked like it was in about you know
60 50 feet of water and this guy stumbles on this thing
and he filmed it and it was just beautiful it was magnificent
and uh he filmed the sharks swimming around in it schools of sharks
like he'd never seen before and
they'd obviously assembled for a reason and because of the shape of this bowl it created some kind of current that made some kind of a circular swirl and it was good for the sharks and they were using it as a very special mating place or something and here's this guy going oh my god i've found this thing nobody's ever seen it before he presents his findings to the world okay he shows his nature special thinking everyone's going to be like oh what a great
scientific fine this is incredible we're going to learn so much and here's the sad part folks this is
what i was alluding to earlier this guy goes back a year later okay still documenting with his
camera crew goes back a year later and there's not one shark okay they've been decimated
fishing boats went in the minute they found out about this sacred place
obliterated it not one shark this guy came up out of the water crying he was crying and he
actually said he goes i can't believe i exposed the sharks to humanity i can't believe i let this
secret out of the bag i told the world thinking that they were they would embrace it and protect it
and instead mankind went in and destroyed it and poached all the sharks and obliterated
whatever it was they were doing there.
I've never seen a man so crushed up and sad
knowing that he led the way to this salad bowl full of sharks.
And they were all just slaughtered for profit, for who knows what.
And you see him underwater swimming around in the same place
that when he was there before was just swirling.
It was like a cereal bowl, and the cereal was sharks.
Like hundreds of sharks just going around and around communicating with each other and mating and doing what they needed to do.
And now this guy goes back down and he's got flashlights and he's searching all around and it's just empty.
It looks like a swimming pool, nothing in it.
And it was just heartbreaking.
And the imagery and to see this guy so crushed up over it.
emotionally.
And I don't know what to say about, you know, the cracking or the giant squid.
I just hope to hell they leave you the hell alone, man.
I'm sure there's a damn good reason you were hiding.
I'm sure the giant squid was like, you know what, man,
I've seen what they've done.
I've seen what they've done to the sharks and the dolphins and the whales.
You know what?
I'm going to hide my ass.
I'm going down to the deepest part of the ocean.
I'm staying away from them motherfucking two-leg, upright, walking devils.
Man, they just eat everything, man.
They're like pigs.
Eat everything they can get.
Just pull us up and kill us and chop us up.
A bunch of monsters.
And now the jig is up and this documentary is out where they're like,
look at this great scientific discovery.
And all these fishermen are going,
No, look at all this excellent giant calamari.
We could charge $70 per calumari ring with this giant.
Chiching, chiching, chiching, chiching, chiching, chiching, chiching, chiching.
Humans.
So I hope they don't get to the giant squid, man.
I just hope.
And if they do get to the giant squid, I hope he fights back.
I hope he comes up out of the ocean and eats them.
I'll be the first one to stand on the end of the dock with my robe
and my crown in my hair and my staff in my hand
and just yelling out to the ocean spray,
release the Kraken!
Release the Kraken!
Release Beyonce's giant legs.
Yeah, that's right.
Did you watch the Super Bowl gang?
I mean, Beyonce's legs.
I mean, these things look like giant redwoods.
She'd be gotten some chunky legs, man.
I don't know if it does it for you guys.
Not my thing.
Just not into the chunky.
leg. You know, it looks great at the front.
Okay? A leg at the front looks like a leg.
But rest assured, if that leg is chunky, if that leg is wide, turn that sucker around
and just look for the sign that's as welcome to Cellulite City.
You notice Beyonce never, like, kind of shows us the back of her legs.
and you notice she's always wearing
like tights, she always wears like
leotards or nylons or something
hell no
oh hell no
she doesn't she ain't exposing
the back of her legs
you kidding me
welcome to cellulite city
and I don't know
does Bianca say need to go
and take walking lessons
is it apparent to you as it is to me
that she stomps everywhere.
She just doesn't know how to walk.
She, like, stomps along, pulls her knees way up,
she stomps her feet down,
her waist twisting back and forth.
I mean, what is with her leg?
Does she have restless leg syndrome?
Why can't she just take a normal step?
I mean, man, talk of it.
She'd be great at making her own wine.
She's always stomping her legs up and down.
You'll watch her walk.
It looks like she's stepping on ants.
Like there's bugs crawling around.
She's like, oh, got to step on that ant.
Crunch, crunch, crunch.
What the hell?
Can you just like slow it down, tone the energy back, and maybe just walk?
Can you do that for us, Beyonce?
I don't know, man.
There's something to be said about dancing and dance moves and gracefulness and sexiness.
Beyoncé's moves to me are just violent.
They're very aggressive.
Very aggressive and very, I don't know.
Confrontational.
Look at me.
I'm walking.
I'm stepping on ants and stepping on ladybugs and worms.
I'm crushing grapes.
When I finish walking, I get thirsty.
I have myself a homemade of 1972 Beyonce Pino-Gua.
I mean, what a name.
That is, her name sounds like a wine.
Yes, waiter, could I have two glasses of Beyonce, please?
Yes, white and red.
Thank you, yes.
Oh, Beyonce, oh, oh, oh.
Easy Charles Nelson Riley.
I mean, if she's going to stomp around like that, like an angry elephant,
or a rhino with a thorn in its hoof,
somebody throw down some bushels of grapes.
Throw a basket in front of her.
You know how football players run through the tires?
You ever see them training?
They got, like, car or truck tires on the field, and the guys have to run through them.
There's about 40 tires.
How about we slap down 40 crates of grapes?
And as Beyonce walks along stomping, she can crush the crap out of the grapes and create some wonderful, delicious wine.
Hey, baby, I'm going for a little walk.
Yeah, well, it's not really a walk.
I'm going to make some product.
I might as well, while I'm walking, I'm exuding all this energy,
I might as well make some Beyonce wine.
You don't.
I mean, what's the point of walking all that way?
Not making any money.
Might as well make some money while I'm walking, right?
So I'm going to walk down to the mailbox.
I'm going to check on the mail.
I'm going to walk back.
And in that spending of time, I'm going to make 70 kegs of wine.
Beyonce wine.
Mm-hmm.
What up?
Beyonce.
Yes, wait, I could have another glass of Beyonce.
It's absolutely delicious.
The last glass you gave me, though, do you mind?
I found the heel of a shoe in it.
Could you...
Is it possible to get it without the heel?
Oh, ha, ho!
Charles.
Oh, Nelson, Riley.
Oh, what the hell is wrong?
I'm drunk on Beyonce.
That's what it is.
So there you go.
That's my Beyonce rant.
And you know what?
Just for that, I'm in the mood.
I've released the Beyonce.
So one more time I'd like to...
Release the Kraken.
And speaking of female performer phenoms, I don't know if I told you cats this or not,
but about a month ago, yours truly went to see none other than Lady Gaga,
which I don't think could be a wine, but maybe like a TV dinner.
Hi, kids, guess what's for dinner?
What?
How about some nice TV lady Gaga's?
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I don't know. I'm trying here. I'm trying to spread the ingenuity around.
So, you know, a friend of mine was going to see Lady Gaga.
It was like a Saturday night.
I had nothing to do.
And I kind of got half invited and half invited myself.
And I was like, I was like, all right, I'll go see it.
It was a free ticket.
There were great seats, you know.
So I went to see her.
And I went with an open mind.
You know, I can't say I'm a huge Lady Gaga fan.
but I heard she's an incredible performer and she puts on a great show and you know
and so uh I thought what the hell you know I remember as a kid I had the you know had the
chance to go and see prints and you know when when you're when you're younger you're like
yeah right like I'm going to go see a guy who wears like women's fishnet stockings yeah sorry
I'm too macho like I couldn't get around all that
BS, all the, all the phony, you know, the costumes and the effeminate ways that Prince had.
But at the end of the day, the guy was a great musician.
He's incredible.
And I always regretted that I didn't go.
And I thought, well, maybe Lady Gaga's the same deal.
Prince was a true original.
Maybe Gaga is a true original.
So I went.
And I got to say, I tried to be objective.
I mean, I didn't try.
I was objective.
and I tried not to be opinionated.
I kept an open mind.
Obviously, she's super popular.
People love her.
And I went, and in all honesty,
I didn't go in with any bias.
I did not love what I saw.
I enjoyed the energy.
I enjoyed being there with my friends.
I enjoyed the atmosphere.
But, you know, when it comes right down to it,
that's not what I'm there for.
to see this performer and
eh
I had a lot of problems with it
um first of all
the presentation I didn't necessarily like
she had this giant set it was like a
looked like a giant castle
and she came out of the castle
upstairs downstairs
from under the floorboards through the window
I mean I don't know
where didn't she come through them through the sewer pipe
maybe
and so she had this giant castle
and then one of the reasons you go to a concert, I think,
is the musical element.
You kind of want to see the people playing music.
You want to connect with the musicians.
And what Lady Gaga did is she kind of hid the musicians
behind the walls of this castle.
You could see them through the walls and through openings,
but they were kind of like window dressing.
And they were kind of concealed and not,
on prominent display.
So you didn't really get to see them very clearly.
And they weren't really lit very well.
So the musicians almost became an afterthought.
So I didn't like that.
And then Gaga herself was supposed to be the focal point.
But the problem with that is she's a tiny person, okay?
She's not very tall.
She's petite.
And she came out with like 40 dancers around her.
And I'm like, well, which one's Lady Gaga?
Who? What? Huh?
So I had trouble figuring out who she, which one was her a lot of the time.
And then when you finally did pick her out, she was dressed like an eggplant or a, you know, a potato.
She was dressed as like an unborn chicken.
She had like a roast beef over her eyes.
She had like a salad bowl on her head.
She was wearing like snowboards on her feet.
I don't know.
Like, you know what?
Sometimes too much costume really kind of blurs your identity.
Like, I get it that Cher does it.
You know, but Cher doesn't hide her face.
You know, Cher keeps her face out there.
And Lady Gaga had so much wacky stuff going on.
I just kind of lost track of her even existing.
And then the other problem,
I had as Lady Gaga, I think
I've talked about this before,
tries to present herself as very
sexual and physical, and she's always
sticking her ass out there
and revealing a little too much
thigh and butt cheek and cleavage.
The problem is, guys, and girls,
I just don't find her that attractive.
Okay, if I'm being a total, like, sexist
pig,
and I got a grade Lady Gaga,
I'm sorry, I'm being,
honest, as a guy, I'd give for about a four out of ten.
And I'm just not good with girls that ain't that hot, trying to pretend that they're hot.
And then secondly, stuffing their junk in my face.
I'm sorry, man, you're not that good-looking.
I don't want to see your ass necessarily.
I don't want to see your boobs or your thighs.
Because you're really not turning me on.
You're kind of grossing me out.
It's like you're trying too hard.
It's like you're over-compensating.
I'm not that good-looking, but if I show you my ass, will you think I'm sexy?
Oh, ha, ha, ha, no.
And then we go from all that physical stuff to the music.
Okay, the girl, the woman can sing.
I'm going to give her that.
She's got the pipe.
She can sing.
She's got the energy.
She can dance.
Not amazing, but she can put on a show.
but at the end of the day
I think when it comes to music
you're there for the music
you're there for the beach
you're there for the sound
you're there for the vocals right
and listen man
I grew up through
went through the whole Madonna thing
and I could hear
in her music
a lot of similarities
to Madonna
let's start with Madonna
with Madonna's Spanish tune that she does.
It's like Ablihosta Bablisa or something.
I don't know how you say it.
You'll recognize the song.
This is Madonna's like a Spanish tune type thing that she did.
Check it out.
Last night I dreamt up San Diego
Just like I never gone
I knew the song
Young girl with eyes like the desert
It all seems like yesterday not far away
Tropical the island drink
All that makes your world is free
This is where I love to be, La Isla Bonita.
And when the summer waves, the star was so high, and through my ears and sting my eyes,
your Spanish never mind.
I'm there in love with Somedaygo.
Okay, right?
all know that song.
Astley Bostleaflo, or whatever it is.
Now, here's Lady Gaga's song called El Fernando, and I don't know.
Is it just me, or do these sound pretty close?
Not only the sound of the song, but the singing, the voice.
Don't call my name.
I don't want to touch, just want my cigarette,
don't call my name, don't call my name.
Romero, Alejandro, Alejandro,
Alejandro, Alejandro,
Alejandro, Alejandro,
Alejandro.
Tropical in the island race,
all that makes your world is great,
this is where I love to be,
I don't know. I'm just saying a little, Madonna's, uh, have a little
close. And then try this song, Madonna's, uh, respect yourself.
Here, have a little snippet of this.
Don't go for second best, baby, put your love to the test.
You know, you know you've got to make him express how it feel.
Baby, then you know your love is real.
You don't need diamond rings on 18-carriage gold.
Fancy cars will go very fast.
You know they never last.
No, no.
What you need is to fix your hand to lift you to your higher ground.
Make you feel like this queen on the phone
Make you love it till you can't come down
Don't go for a second best, baby
Put your love to the test
You know you know you've got to
Make him express how it feels
And maybe then you know your love is real
Okay, you all know that song
Now here's Gaga
So hold your head of gun and you're going to stay.
I'm on the right.
I'm on the right chat.
Okay, one more time.
Madonna, real quick clip.
And Lady Gaga.
So hold your head and you know you're going to make him express how it feels. And maybe then you know your love is real.
I don't know. Is it just me?
Am I the only one hearing it?
Anyways, I guess the reason these songs jumped out at me so much
is because even watching Lady Gaga on stage strutting around doing her concert,
it reminded me a lot of what Madonna does on stage.
And it's not like Madonna has the patent on showmanship or whatever it is she does.
but I got to tell you, man, Lady Gaga was a little too close to our dude Madonna for my liking.
And it's not like I'm a big Madonna fan.
But I don't know.
If I was Madonna and I'm sitting in that crowd watching Lady Gaga from the dancing to the show
to some of the hairstyles to the costumes to the sound to some of the music,
I might be a little bit like, yo, oh hell no.
you know what I mean back off beauch i don't know i mean it's tough in the entertainment industry
people cross over people are influenced by people now i'm not going to sit here and say that
lady gaga is a plagiarist that lady gaga sits down and goes oh madonna wrote a song just like
this but maybe some riffs got stuck in her head subliminally i don't know they sound a little
close to me.
And the other side of
the Lady Gaga show that I didn't necessarily
love, I found the whole presentation
a bit pretentious.
It was a little bit too
artsy-fartsy.
There comes a point when you go,
okay, is this person really an artist?
Or are they just presenting
what an artist would present?
Like if they kind of gone,
well, if I put an eggshell on my head
and I do this
and is this kind of what people will think is art?
I don't know.
I'm not discounting her.
I don't want to be mean.
I don't want to say that she's not an artist.
But I don't know.
I was a little suspicious.
And then the last thing I'll talk about is she was a little preachy.
You know, she was a little bit preachy up there talking about how we should all get along and how, you know, everybody has meaning.
And, you know, it was kind of all positive messages.
But then she kind of threw in some contradictory negative messages.
She was talking about how everyone should be good and try their best and not cause shit.
And then like 10 minutes later, she was asking people in the crowd if they had drugs
and to smoke joints and have a drink.
and be rebellious, and then a little later on after that,
she walked out on stage with a bra that was two machine guns.
Literally they were like rubber or plastic machine guns sticking out of her boobs.
They came out probably about a foot, maybe a little longer than a foot, 12, 14 inch replicas of machine guns.
and this was just after the Sandy Hook incident
where those poor children were massacred.
Now, not that, you know, I'm not one to say,
oh, well, some people were killed,
you can never show guns again.
But I don't know.
Lady Gaga has a young, influential audience,
and I don't know if, you know,
having guns out there is really what you want.
I mean, there's heavy metal bands
that don't show that kind of imagery.
And here's a little bit of her at the concert.
I caught some of her like preaching and talking,
and I don't know if it's annoying to you,
but it kind of got annoying to me.
Check it out.
And I used to walk in there and they'd be talking about my crazy clothes
and my crazy ideas about everything.
And I thought, well, you might not think that I'm like you.
and you may not think I'm like
anybody else that's making music right now
but at least I know who the fuck I am
I don't know
do you really know who the fuck you are
I mean one second you're dressed as an eggplant
and the next second you're
you look like you're in a lobster trap
I don't know
look
this is a mixed review I know it's leaning
a little negative but I'm just keeping it real
I give her points for being, you know, an energetic performer.
She's definitely got some talent, but maybe, you know, the areas I touched on,
her music and her style and her show is very close to what Madonna does.
And, you know, I didn't get all the speeches in there that I heard,
but maybe a little bit too preachy and contradictory.
So it's not a glowing review.
Let's be honest.
But I, as a reformer myself, I respect anyone who gets up on stage and she makes millions of people happy and they love her music.
So I got to give her all that.
But I'm keeping it real with the other stuff.
Some of the negatives.
I'm also touching on the positives.
I'm careful.
You know, I don't like to slam people and just say they're crap.
So I'm offering up the good and the bad, as I see it.
This may, this will not be your opinion.
This may not be anybody's opinion.
It's my own opinion.
Just trying to keep it real in the deal.
But, hey, you know, God bless you.
Go out there, do your thing.
And maybe Lady Gaga wants to review the Harland Highway.
She's welcome to.
She can praise it.
She can slam it.
She can take some tracks and compare it to other podcasts.
Who knows?
Maybe my podcast sounds just like some other guys.
Oh, I hope not.
Because if it does, then I'm going to start singing my podcast,
and it's going to sound a lot like Madonna.
Okay?
Give me some Madonna.
And we'll go out on that.
Um, God.
Maybe I shouldn't go to these concerts.
I get too involved.
They get too invested.
But I had a good time.
It was fun.
And there you go.
I'm going to leave it right there.
And we'll pick it up next time with more crazy topics, things to talk about.
Don't forget, check out my new stand-up comedy special.
Harlan Williams, A Force of Nature, available on iTunes.
You can download it or you can get a hard.
hard copy from amazon.com
and uh you can also order it from my store if you want an autographed copy personally
autographed by me go to harlowe williams.com click on the store and we will ship one out to you
with my john hencock on there okay uh if you want to write three uh harlow williams.com
if you want to send me a note if you want to leave a voice message 323 739
4330 and don't forget to check harland williams.com for all my stand updates uh check that out
visit our store at harlan williams.com check out my app harland app dot com if you want a free app for
your phone with all kinds of harland highway characters on it check it out and that's it
man that's all i got that's all's i got don't forget all being
San Diego at the American Comedy Co.
Next weekend, Valentine's Day, February 14th to the 16th.
And then this weekend, starting tonight, I'll be in Cleveland, Ohio, at hilarities,
Pickwick and Frolic.
I'll be Thursday through Saturday night at hilarities.
Come on out and see me live, baby.
I'm going to do
All Lady Gaga's songs
It's going to be awesome
So that's it
Enjoy your Madonna
Enjoy your Gaga
And until next time
Always enjoy
A great big plate
Of chicken
Chalmain
Baby
Stam closes all the way
To your heart
But he needs to start
With your head
Satin sheets
A very romantic
Take what happens when you're not in bed.
You deserve the best in life.
So if your time is it right, then move on.
Second best is never enough.
You do a much better, baby, on your own.
Don't go for second best, baby,
put your love to the chest.
You know, you know you got to
Make him express
How we feel
You believe it and you know your love is real
Expect yourself
You're tired to make him
Expect to himself
Hey, hey, hey, hey
Hey
So if you want it right now
Making sure you have
Expect what you got
It's really ready on now