The Harland Highway - 585 - Harland is a guest on PETE HOLMES podcast - part 3

Episode Date: June 19, 2014

Harland is a guest on PETE HOLMES podcast YOU MADE IT WEIRD, a chance to hear Harland on the other side of the mic - part 3 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mother bring me my chainsaw. I want to cut the house in half. Huh? Why would I want to cut the house and half? And who's mother? Hey, gang, it's me. I'm not mother, but I'm Harlan Williams, and I am mothering this mothership of a podcast into the landing strip.

And it's confusing today because it's two podcasts. It's my podcast. Okay, the Harland Highway. But I'm playing another guy's podcast, a guy named Pete Holmes, whose podcast I was a guest on, and I didn't want you guys to miss the conversation because, you know, sometimes you don't know about other podcasts and whatnot, so I thought it would be fun just to play his podcast on my podcast. And that way I'm cross-promoting him,

and you guys get to hear an interview with me that you might not have heard if you were listening to him. And also I thought you guys might find it interesting to see or hear me on the other side of the microphone where I'm not the host of the podcast, but I'm being questioned and conversing with a host on another podcast, which is a really good one. So this is part three of four parts. If you want the other parts, go back and check them out. But let's do it.

It's the Pete Holmes podcast. You made it weird on the Harland. Highway You just made a wrong turn onto the Harland Highway I am out here for you You don't know what it's like to be me Out here for you

It's like I picked the wrong week We're smooth I'm funny how I mean funny like I'm a clown I amuse you Like I took the wrong week Quit drinking I make you laugh

I'm here to fucking amuse you You're riding down the Harland Highway With Harland Williams I'd buy that for a dollar What was it we had for dinner tonight? Well we had A choice. Steak, fish. Yes, yes, I remember. I had lasagna.

What do you mean funny? Funny how? How am I funny? It's like I picked the wrong week to quit am fit of me. She's got a thought for Samantha thing to sign. Welcome to the Harland Highway. Get the wrong week, quit sniff and blue. Now entering nerdist.com. Yes, you made it weird. You made it weird with Pete Holmes.

What's up, weirdos? I'm thrilled that Harlan Williams came in and made it weird, and I honestly can't think of a more ideal guest, somebody that was just incredibly willing and ready to just dive right in. And this is somebody that I only know from the stand-up scene. We do shows together, you know, maybe once a month I'll see him. And he came into the studio, and he was just exactly. what we want out of the show, just ready to go, open, honest, and very, very funny.

So let's not waste any time. All right, Harland Williams, everybody. Harland Williams. We put this to you, two things. One thing that I think about all the time is I think it's possible to make a 30-minute film about anybody that would make you hate somebody. Absolutely. Or make you love them.

Politics, yeah. Either way. Yeah. Like, we have the most intimate moments of your life. I have you in sixth grade giving your milk to nerdy, nerdy-nettie, and you gave them your chocolate milk, and it meant so much. And then I can also make the thing of you, like, at our lowest. Yeah.

Calling some woman a cocksucker as you cut her off in traffic and all the, like garbage, just like worse things. Absolutely. So that dichotomy, that idea, and I try and keep that in my mind when I'm dealing with people, is even if you're getting someone who's super shitty, I always have that fantasy of like, what if I took. this person and we sent them to Fiji

right and like what if I had a hundred billion dollars and here's some guy and he's just so fuck up and he does seem pretty evil and he's shitty could we send him to Fiji could we introduce him to things love even stuff like

better nutrition I know that's kind of crazy but like give them exercise give them better nutrition give them light sunlight yeah give them community give them purpose, give them structure, you know what you mean? It's like this is your job, you get fulfillment out of it. I don't know if that works for everybody, but some of those people stop stabbing people. Stop, but what you're missing is they've already done it.

You know what I mean? So you're putting all that rehabilitation on the shoulders of a victim, you know what I mean? Which is where, again, it gets blurred for me. And I believe in compassion. I believe in forgiveness. I believe in the human spirit. I love that stuff. You know, I think we've all had moments in our life

where we've had to forgive people that have done us wrong. But, again, this comes down to extreme cases. And I'd rather bank on the well-being of the child that might get abused or the woman that might get raped versus the well-being of this guy that's already shown his hand that he can be very destroyed. to another human being. The other thing, though, I say to that is that you are you because of your upbringing, because you were taught certain values and stuff.

And then I think about like brainwashing. When I think about like, did you watch Homeland? I'm guessing. No, I did. Watch Breaking Bad first. In fact, you don't even need to watch Homeland in my opinion. Screw Homeland. It was good, but I don't know if it was as good as everyone said.

Yeah. I love that you agreed. Did you haven't seen it? No, I haven't seen it. It's really beautiful. You're right. You're right again. I like a blind because of a bond.

You're going to side with me. Oh, God. I'm on your side with the swan. But in that, we talk about here, I'll tell you two things. One is when someone is captured by the enemy in war and they're tortured and they come back and we see them still in the suit and raising the flag and walking with good posture and coming back to their family and returning, we love that because that's a story of the human spirit not being. broken. But there is a situation possibly where I take you as you are today and we do a different thing. I'm not taking you to feed you. I'm taking you to the worst place. We're going to Guantanamo Bay. Guantanamo. We're going to something like that. And every day I'm just

going to break you down, which we know is possible. And then I'm going to brainwash you and I'm going to teach you through abuse or whatever to hate your fellow man, to distrust. open up the idiot mammal inside of you and turn you into something that you're not, or, you know, manipulate you in another way to somehow hurt other people. Yeah. I mean, then what? Then you're hurting other people and you're still making that choice, but at some point, and these are extreme examples, and I don't know, I don't know what to say to this.

But, like, what I'm saying is just basically, like, we're, we're, I think what we're saying is when we're looking at a person and we're trying to judge it, how close do we zoom in? And I think, quote, unquote, compassionate people are saying, let's take a wide shot. And you're like, this kid grew up and his mother threw him in a dumpster. And then here he is at 29. And he killed someone that looked just like his mother or whatever. Right, right. And you're saying, let's zoom it in closer.

And again, that's an appeal. And you go, fuck that. I don't care about years one through 29. I care. It sounds like a good lawyer. I don't care about that. I care about April 19th. Yeah.

and I care about 2 p.m. And I care about a young man leaving a movie. You know what I mean? Nice, yeah. Yeah. I like that. And that is appealing to us. That again goes to us being like problem.

People want to pop blisters and cut out tumors and all that sort of shit. We like it. Yeah. I don't know. I'm not even going to put it to you because I feel like it's just too much of a moral quandary. Yeah, it's tough because like I said, there's so many blurry lines. But, you know, I guess in my fantasy world, I wish there was a way we could stop people hurting each other.

And the answers that I gave aren't the solution, but they're like a fantasy solution. But again, I think about a kid. They're doing something downstairs. Uh-oh. Maybe they're burying a body. It should be perfect for what we're talking about. But if someone's hurting a kid or a woman, you know, I see red.

And so I lash out and I'm like, screw that person. I don't care what their story is. You know, you had problems, and you walked into the life of someone completely innocent and not part of your world, and you destroyed their world, screw you. Right. And that's a very basic, might not be the most intelligent way, or it might be the most brilliant way. I don't know. But that's the quandary of being human. Yeah.

And, you know, we've come to a place in humanity where you see it every day, where we sift through it. We have to deal with this. That's really bad. What is that? I think it is a dentist office. It sounds so dentistry. Somebody's getting their teeth drilled. I know, but we'll be done in two hours.

Wow. Okay. Goodbye pilot. Hello, Harlem. Come. Yeah, well, they're doing the meltdown pilot here. That's great. The stand-up, it's like going to be a stand-up show.

Oh, wow. A stand-up comedy show. Okay. Are you going to do it? I am doing it, yeah. Tomorrow night. Is that the one where they, it's the, it's the, They don't, they'd give you the topics once you're on stage.

No, that's set list. Okay. You did that? I did that. Yeah. We did that together? I don't know if we did that. We did some local clubs together.

Yeah. We didn't do. Oh, let's talk about that. That'll lighten the mood. Oh, yeah. Well, the thing is just to clean up what we just start. Sure. You know, people, it's not necessarily a light in the mood thing.

It's like, it's who we are. It's something you got to deal with. Right. But it's an interesting topic. It's obviously a passionate topic. Right. And we're not going to solve it today, but I mean, like, I feel like it's interesting. I think, like, if we started over, you know what I mean?

I often think about that, too, as, like, either it's a commune or it's some sort of like apocalyptic, where everybody just drops it. So the world is still here, but there's only 50 of us. Yeah. You know, I mean, that would be easier to manage. I don't know. Did you ever watch Lost? Yeah. Not easy to manage.

Yeah. it's all the same stuff you know you're right you know the the real thing i've often heard the story you talked earlier about you know the possibility of aliens dropping us here yeah you know i've always always heard the kind of these stories of of the progression of humanity where we evolved to the point where we're all these bulbous headed creatures with the almond shaped eyes and there's no more use for language we just everything's telepathic and we all kind of assimilate and become one mind meld and you go that that would be horrible but then you also go but would it be if we were still able to have our imaginations and our inventiveness and yeah all the things that

were good but everything was kind of had a harmony to it I interesting absolutely yeah oh god you're right in my wheelhouse I mean that feeling of um here here's what I'm about to tell you oh my god so frightening alone right now hold me give me some cinnamon and hold me zombie cinnamon. This is a weird day. There's a lot of people here. People that listen to this show know that I'm interested in astral projection. I'm going to keep this real quick.

Great. You know what it is? Yeah, it's when you astrally project. You go outside of your body and look down at yourself. Like a voluntary out of body. Yeah, exactly. Have you ever done it? No.

Have you? No, do you want to? I'm terrified. Why? I would be afraid to do it. Why? It just seems scary. In fact, most people that do do it or claim to do it, for those who are skeptical that it's even possible to do it, which is completely reasonable, you leave your body and your first feeling is like, I'm dead.

Like, if you float above your body and it's not a dream and you're just like, holy shit, your first feeling is extreme panic and you're like, I've died, this is my soul left my body, I'm gone. But you do go back to your body, right? You do go back to your body, yep. So if you know you're going back, why be scared? That's like getting on a rollercoach. You're like, I'm going to be scared, but I know I'm going to come back. I like your approach. But I mean, like, who knows?

We're in this world that like so few people have done and the people who have done it. It's all kind of like a cult and like Salem Witches, I believe we're doing something very similar. So it's not like a place you can go. Like Larry's out of body experiences on Melrose. Right. All you can float for $40 type of thing. It's not like. If it had been kind of like FDA,

approved or tested it because the guy in the book it's called journeys out of the body i loved it i really tore through it it's basically just his journal entries and it was in the late 50s and 60s this guy did this every night and he wrote down all these experiences whoa and um oh what were you just going to oh okay one of the reasons i don't want to do it is it starts to turn it actually has the arc of a good movie at the beginning he's flying around he's visiting friends he leaves it out but i'm sure he's going and looking at naked girls oh yeah you have sure why wouldn't don't be an asshole Robert yeah 50s pussy yeah unshaved and fluffy oh like a slipper and it's pulling a sheet of cookies out of an oven oh god that's 1950s he uh it takes a turn

as he starts going to other dimensions blah blah and um then when he starts doing it he starts getting like attacked so he would have these unpleasant he would project and then the first thing that would happen was like a big wolf creature would attack him and he'd wrestle with it and he'd right, that it was the most terrifying thing he's ever done. So even if it is, let's say it is a hallucination that it's all baloney, it's, you've still opened up this part of your brain that is now hallucinating that huge wolf creatures are attacking you. Right.

And you think you're going to die. Right. And then he talks about these rubbery children that would cling to him. Wow. It sounds very bad, dreamy, nightmare, but very vivid, very, he keeps insisting that it wasn't a dream that it was very real, just as real as this world is. Anyway, the reason I told you all that, other than I'd love to hear what you, I'd love talking about it all the time.

is that he claims that he went to a place called, that he believes is the Christian heaven. Hey, everybody, who wants to have better sex? No, yes, yes. The answer is yes. You always want to have better sex. That's what, you want it to be better, not worse. Trust me.

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so you get your discount and 100% free shipping code Harland. Have fun. Don't throw your back out. He also, he went to a place that he thought was like hell. And he visited a dimension where he was like, I think this is what they're talking about. and the way he describes having one interesting point is he was depressed for months afterwards he said

because he had been to the best place and he never went back to it because he was like it's just too painful to leave so he went to it and he said the feeling and what made me think of it with your almond eyes and the grays and the telepath telepathy and all that sort of stuff was he was like it was the feeling of being completely connected like that is one of the feelings that I think when you when you go to lunch with your phone and when I when I talk about that synthetic social thing where I have blah blah thousand Twitter followers and blah blah a thousand Facebook friends

imagine if that was real and I think that is where we're headed in another hundred years or whatever maybe less maybe more maybe we will get to a point where there's an organic actual we're connecting we've merged technology and whatever our essence is into some sort of collective

think it's possible think I think that's where we're headed. Well, we might have to with the population exploding, expanding. I mean, we're at $7 billion now. There's too many wars. There's too much infighting. And when you've got a fish tank full of too many fish, either eventually somehow they've got to find a way to meld and evolve and survive

or they end up just destroying each other. And I think there was a time when we weren't as evolved in terms of, technology and we had World War I and World War II but now we're out a place where our technology could wipe out humanity rather quickly but we also have technology now that could unify humanity rather quickly and I think that unification process is going to you know excel more and more I mean look how the internet's brought people together look how cell phones look how FaceTime all this stuff and social networking and I think that's going to be perpetuated to the point of where either the human race globally comes together collectively or we kill each other.

We kill each other and it feels like it's heading towards a collective place despite all the wars and Afghanistan and, you know, all the things that look like, oh, we're never going to get along. But it feels like ultimately we have to push through and get to that place or we might not make it. But that's just a theory and what do I know? I'm in a room surrounded by egg cartons, you know. No, you're right. That's sort of connecting. And then, like, you know, what we're doing less if we are all hooked up to one consciousness sort of thing, where we retain, as you were saying, our creativity and our individuality. But, like, you know, and they talk about this in the singularity is the idea that I'll be able to see all of your thoughts, basically.

And privacy will just be completely gone. But I think what they're saying is that'll be a euphoric experience. It might be, yeah. The feeling of unplugging from this world. Actually, I'm getting this from the movie, The Transcendent Man, and he says a very similar thing to Robert Monroe when he left heaven was he said the feeling of unplugging from the matrix of all of our consciousnesses would be so lonely that it would be devastatingly depressing to leave the group.

But if we are all hooked up, and I am experiencing your memories and hearing your jokes, like I don't go to a show anymore. I just go and experience you. Yeah. And everybody's just spilling into each other. I think collectively there's no we're fucking less

we're breeding less you know what you mean it just becomes kind of like a maintaining of like what we are there's less all those aliens are really skinny there's less

raping the earth and well there's probably but we get to a place where there's virtual sex where it's just as gratifying and just as fulfilling as real physical sex but it's basically

an app on your phone where it's like you can press a body and you're having a full-on threesome with all the experiences you'd have if it was real. Right. Or who knows by that time

there may be Android, there may be robotic people. I mean, all this stuff is evolving to these places. Right. And then there'll be people who unplug and have real fucking and they're like,

this is better. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. In a field where there's nothing around with a dragonfly on your ass jeet. That's the way it should be.

You ain't fucking till there's a dragon. Dragon flower on your ass player. Oh, hell no. Why a black guy? I don't know. I don't know. Maybe it was a white guy doing a black guy voice. I don't know.

I don't know. Well, oh, God, what was I going to say? Fucking. We're talking about fucking... Oh, oh, that's what they say the next world war. That's what they say. That's what some people think will be the next world war is the idea that there will be some people

that want to merge and assimilate and merge technology. and our essence into one thing. And there'll be prophets that are talking the way that I am that are like, you'll be able to have sex with anybody and this and this. And you won't even eat anymore. It'll just be like a Matrix pod sort of thing. But your consciousness will be evolved.

Your body will be perfect. You'll have everything that you want. I was just talking to my friend Zach Krieger about this, though, some book about Prime Directive. It has Prime Directive in the title. And Prime Directive is the singularity, basically, and it's this one consciousness that, and we're all kind of living in this version.

reality and you have the body you want and you have three ways on your phone but you're perpetually coming you know what I mean and he was saying in the book and I think this is right is that people start becoming incredibly incredibly depressed and what they do is they sign contracts to leave prime directives oversight so that they could be tortured and maimed and hurt you know what I mean because they miss pain so much because other the other thing that people do is put themselves in a perpetual state of a 10,000 orgasm simultaneously, and they just stay there, like zoned out, basically just blissed out forever. But, you know, this is the matrix, and this is the point is that, like, without pain

and without mortality, none of this makes any sense. So we comprehend right now. Right. Yeah, the prophet, you're telling you're getting me into the assimilation. Well, what I'm saying is this is how we perceive it right now. but we haven't been there yet so when we get there right you know this opinion may be antiquated or based on fear or lack of knowledge but once you get there maybe it's it's bliss maybe maybe you get to that place and then you go well what's the next layer yeah there's a layer beyond everything you just said

and that's the beauty of being human we never stop reaching we never stop imagining and when you think you're at the pinnacle, there's another peak over there in the distant galaxy or in the distant images of your imagination. It never ends with the human mind. That's what's fascinating. We may de-evolve back to microorganisms for everything we have today and in the future is concealed in a microorganism. We're just, we're invisible to the naked eye, but yet everything exists. It's like Horton, here's a who. I mean, who knows where it ends. It's, you know what I mean? It's just like, we're a bunch of whews. We're a bunch of whores. Yeah.

It's, I mean, there's, there's, you, you can, you can, you can, you can, you can visualize the future, but then once people get to the future, they'll be visualizing a future. Uh-huh. And, and, and who knows what happens, who knows what that future is visualizing? That's, that's the, that's the big bummer about death. The only thing that I regret about dying is that I want to see where it all goes. Like I want to, there is no end, but I want to watch it. I want to watch

that horse run across the field for eternity. I want to see all the new inventions. I want to see what happens to us. So wait, you're excited to see what happens when you die? No. What I'm saying is I don't want to die so I can see what happens to us

as a human race. And not just the human race, but the planet, the animals the you know right where where does it stop and it unfortunately it doesn't so i'd have to just i'm telling you right now i'm going to have to be alive forever i'm sorry i'm very sorry if you're annoyed by me well get here forever yeah i just announced it i'm going to be eternal i will live even highlanders you know your sword-wielding scotsies little scotsies you're going to be a cinnamon covered zombie i'm going to be a cinnamon covered life Life zombie, yeah.

Yeah, forever. Oh, you mean Harlan? Yeah. I smell cinnamon. Here he comes. Somebody's nearby. Here he comes. So, do you think it lights out when you die?

You know, it's an interesting question because it's going back to what we talked about earlier that humans have egos. And if you break it down, you know, if you get around your human ego, does a lion think he's going to lie in heaven? Does a giraffe think he? No, they probably think, you know, when I finish eating this twig and I get eaten by a lion, that's it. But because we're human, part of me suspects that it's our egos that think we keep going. Yeah. Because we can't possibly die with the masters of planet Earth. We're above and beyond all other living creatures.

We must go somewhere else. Yeah. But in that same statement, I do believe in faith and I do believe in a higher energy, a higher power. So I think there's a lot of mystical stuff that happens on Earth and a lot of spiritual stuff. And so I don't discount it, but I question it. And so I would hope that there's somewhere interesting we go, but I just, I don't live by that. Yeah. It keeps coming back up when we talk about religion often comes up, always comes up on the show, is that the Buddha did not care really about an afterlife.

if he cared about the ending of suffering. So when people were like, where do I go when I die? He's like, that question comes from suffering. You're suffering and you're afraid, let's deal with that. You know what, you know, through meditation and peace and presence. Be the lion that isn't going like, what next, just be eating that elk. Right. And the ego is this great protector of our species.

But it's also the thing that is polluting our spiritual reason going like, of course we stick around. Are you fucking kidding me? Yeah. Look at how cool we are. But, like, that's not necessarily true. If we can get outside of that and really look at it objectively, which I don't know if we can, but maybe we can. Well, I mean, next time you want to know the answer, kick open a nest of ants and see all the ants scrambling around and look at them and go, oh, all those little guys, after I spray them with off, they're all going to float up to ant land, ant heaven. Yeah.

Because that's what we are. We're just an ant nest. We're all swarming around. We've all got our little roads. We call those parasites earlier, yeah. Yeah, well, same thing, yeah. Well, that's another matrix thing. We're a plague.

We're a virus spreading. On this planet? Oh, of course we are. And we hurt each other. Yeah, we heard everything. Humans heard everything. Yeah. It doesn't make any sense.

It doesn't make, but again, I'm going back to we have the ability to dream and see a future. Yeah. And my hope is that we keep rolling along. And right now, we're killing a lot of stuff. We're destroying a lot, but we're also creating. And I'm hoping we get to that. Look at it as a speed bump where we hit this speed bump

where we've done all this negative stuff but finally the accumulation of all these things we've done, all these inventions, the super collider, the spaceships, the Hubble telescope, all this stuff gets us over this speed bump. We're finally in a place

where everything's harmonious. We've preserved our planet. We've saved the environment, the ecosystem, the animals. We've even brought back the animals that we made extinct through their DNA, the ones we can, you know, stuff like that. It's a bit of a sounds like a bit of a fantasy, but I

feel like... It's no more preposterous than anything else. Right. We could do it. It would be the omelet. We're breaking all these eggs, and hopefully we do get... I love the idea of getting over that speed bump. Yeah. Like, oh, we were shitty, but it got us here. Yeah, it's like a relationship. You know, this is the phase of the

relationship where it's like all this bad stuff's happening, but in this relationship won't work, but get over that bump and the next one's going to be bliss. It's like, oh, this is how it's supposed to be. That's great. You know what I mean? It's so hopefully.

Hope, I hold hope for humankind and more than human kind. I hold hope for all the other creatures on the planet that we've decimated and damaged and hurt. And hopefully we can repair it all and make it all whole again. Hopefully. Yeah. I hope so. So the higher power, it seems pretty nondescript and you're kind of open. I think the higher power.

Power to me is evident in nature. Nature is God to me. If there's a God, I think, you know, it's, again, it's not in this false world that man's built. It's in the real world that coats, you know, the outer skin, the epiduric layer of planet Earth. It's trees, it's water, it's, these are the things that were made crafted, you know,

in nature and all these pieces work together. And obviously, somehow we became a part of that. but I look at the masterwork of a creator as in nature not so much humans I think humans are too flawed maybe you know we might we possibly could be the mistake I don't know I mean think of it God elbowed something off the desk yeah I don't know I mean I'm not saying where we're all we're horrible I love humanity I love like I said I think we can pull it out I think we do great things but but when you hold put us in in this planet next everything else and you look at how we've raped it and used it and depleted it and polluted it it's just it's it's it's hard sometimes

yeah yeah yeah yeah but i i hold hope i don't want to sound depressing and be like oh we should all just run off a cliff i do believe that we're we're learning a lesson here and i think we will we will evolve and move forward and correct it and make it right and it's a hard time right now but we're growing and learning I hope so I think you might be right I hope you're right that's that's the correct phrasing I hope you're right yeah and it sounds great yeah I hope so I hope so man yeah we we have you know humanity has a lot to offer and there's a lot out there to find still yeah who knows what's out there yeah we might we might reach another place another planet, another species, another, who knows?

Yeah, that'd be cool. Yeah, that would be cool, man. So there you go. There's part, I guess that's part three of my chat with Pete Holmes on the You Made It Weird podcast. Please check that podcast out if you're enjoying what you're hearing. And that's it. We'll do the final clip from my interview with Pete and, you know, a few podcasts down the road. I'm spreading it out a little bit because, like I said, we did two hours total, really long, but really enjoyable.

So let's do some announcements. Let's do some sweet announcements right now. Let's see. Check out Harlow Williams.com. check out my stand-up comedy special, see if I'm coming, or not special schedule. My stand-up comedy schedule, see if I'm coming to a town or city near you. I will be in Pittsburgh this coming weekend. That's going to be, or sorry, next weekend.

God, I'm all discombobulated. See what happens when I don't do my own podcast and hijack someone else's? Next weekend, June 27th, Friday, June 27th, I will be, in Pittsburgh doing the comedy festival there. So please go to my website, harloweems.com, and click on the stand-up link and get all the pertinent information. You can write me at harlolwilms.com.

You can leave a voicemail at harlolowwilms.com. Or you can just call me. 3-23-739-4330. That's 3-23-739-43-30. Leave a voicemail. Say whatever you want. I don't mind. You can say whatever you want.

I don't mind. Also, click on my YouTube channel, subscription button when you're at my homepage at harloliams.com, and you'll be the first to get all my wacky videos, which are always a lot of fun and goofy and stupid. Give you a little laugh during your hectic day. And check out all thingscomedy.com, which is the podcast network where you can catch my action

and tell your friends about the Harland Highway. And that's it. That's it. We are out of here. We piggybacked on the back of Pete Holmes. You made it weird. And like I said, we'll have the final segment coming up down the road. And thanks for tuning in, folks.

And until next time, chicken, show me, baby.