The Harland Highway - 664 - LIFE COACH DR. DEBBIE THYMER. Iran nuke deal, crazy pets.

Episode Date: April 13, 2015

Life Coach Dr. Debbie Thymer takes a call from a girl who was expelled from school. Do you ever have strange things laying at your front door? The insanity of the Iran nuke talks with the USA. Someone was attacked by an unusual pet. Whack a stack!! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Oh my God, oh my God. What a show we have today, ladies and gentlemen. Welcome to the Harland Highway. I am your host with the most. Harland Williams with some toast. No, I don't have toast. But I'm toasting you for being here on this crazy podcast. Welcome. We have quite a show today. I'm going to be talking about this damn Iran-USA nuclear bomb. negotiation deal that they're trying to put together. It's driving me a bit nuts, so I'm going to rant about that. I think we're going to be hearing from Dr. Debbie Timer, the life coach. She's going to be on the air here, doling out some of her expert medical advice to people calling in. So we'll hear from Dr. Debbie Timer. Also, the Harland Highway question of the day, and it involves a massacre. It's very grisly and gruesome.

The question of the day involves a wicked, wicked massacre. Yeah. And then we're going to round out the show with a crazy news story. A government official was attacked by a very peculiar animal. You're not going to believe it when you hear this one, but you will hear it. So take your earmuffs off. This is the Harland Highway. Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to introduce

The Harland Highway I promise you, I will please you all, believe me What is he like? What's he going, anyway? Oh, he's an angel. He's an angel stuck from nothing. You're going to need a bigger coach. You're listening to Harlan Williams.

Why don't you give me a name and a face and a reason why? Your man, what do you expect the guy that's jig alone, man? It's over, Jenny. It's over. Nothing is over! You just don't turn it off. You just made a wrong turn.

On to the Harland Highway. Weird. Just plain weird. You're not me. I'm still alive. I'll tell you what I won't give you, you muckers. I won't give you the satisfaction of saying that I'm sorry. Welcome to the Harland Highway.

Oh, you get your money to work. Believe me. Hi, I'm Dr. Debbie Timer, and I'm your life coach. I am my baby's mother's sister's daughter, and it's time to get a life, your life. Hi, everybody, I'm Dr. Debbie Timer, and it's great to have you here. as you know we take your phone calls and we try to help people sort out things that are going on in their lives we always take calls about sexual dysfunction or maybe abuse or psychological problems that people are dealing with basically i'm here to help you sort things out kind of clean out your

mental garage. And why don't we start today with a call coming in from Cleveland, Ohio. It looks like we have Tara Painter on the line. Hello, Tara, are you there? Hi, Dr. Deppie. How are you? Okay, just settle down, child. Sorry, Dr. Deppie.

I get anxiety when I get the giggles. That's okay, child. Is this your first time on the radio? Yes, Dr. Debbie. I'm very excited and nervous. Well, just take it easy. Take a deep breath. Okay.

Okay, I just, I meant to take one long deep breath. Okay, Dr. Debbie. I said take one. Just, do you know what one is, child? Yes, Dr. Debbie, is that rating between zero and two? Yes, that's right. Just one nice, long, deep breath, okay? Okay, Dr. Debbie, here I go.

Okay, that's long enough, okay? You sound like a fire-breathing dragon. Well, you said take a long, deep, dark, dark breath, Dr. Debbie. Okay, when I say that, I mean a second or two. I don't mean half an hour, okay? It sounds like you're mad at me, Dr. Debbie. Well, I'm not, I'm not mad at you. It's just part of communicating, child, is listening.

And when you're on a radio show, like mine, where I'm here to help you, you need to listen. Okay, am I listening now? Dr. Debbie, he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-ha. Well, just, you can't be giggling. I know you're nervous. I know you're nervous, child, but I need you to stop giggling and stop. Should I breathe again? Dr. Debbie? No, stop it.

Okay, you're going to sit there and you're going to listen. But I need to tell you why I'm calling in, Dr. Debbie Timer. Okay, why don't we get to that, okay? Why are you calling in? Because I got suspended from school for four weeks, Dr. Debbie Timer. Okay, well, that's not uncommon. How old are you, child? I'm 14 years old, and I got suspended Dr. Debbie Timer for...

Okay, first of all, you don't need to say my last name, okay? Just Dr. Debbie. But I thought your name was Dr. Debbie Timer, Dr. Debbie Timer. Okay, you know what? You're starting to, shall I say it lightly, annoy me a little. Just say my first name. You don't need to say the whole name. Okay, Dr. Debbie, I'm...

100% on board. Okay, why don't you tell me why you got kicked out of school for a month? Well, all I did, Dr. Debbie, was give some of my classmates, um, nicknames. Is that wrong? Well, no, child, nicknames are usually a sign of affection. It's a term of endearment that most children, even adults, have a tendency to give nicknames to people they know. That's exactly right, Dr. Debbie, and I gave nicknames to some of the people in my class, and I got sent home. Okay, stop laughing. Why don't you give me an example, child, of one of the nicknames?

Well, there was a Greek child in my class, a boy named Tony Papinacolo. Okay, that's very Greek. Yes, and I gave a Greek. him a nickname. I gave Tony Papanacolo a nickname, Dr. Debbie. Okay, well, can you share with me what the nickname was? I called him Tony Papsmere. I beg your pardon? Papsmere, Tony Papsmere. Okay, why would you call a young boy in your class a Papsmere? Well, did you know what a Papsmere is, Dr. Debbie? Um, yes, I do know what a Papsmere. is. Okay, well, the pap smear is a vaginal test where they scrape the vaginal walls for bacteria.

The test for pre-cancerist ends up. Okay, I know what a pap smear is. I'm a certified doctor. I went to school for 12 years. I have 12 degrees, okay? You don't need to tell me. What a pap smear is child. Okay, Dr. Debbie, well, Tony's last name is Papinacalo? Yes. That's the same name of the doctor that invented the pap smear. So I thought it would be a term of endearment, as you said, to call them Papsmere. Okay.

Although technically you are accurate child, Papsmere is a very vulgar, you know, nickname to give to especially one of your classmates. It's hurtful, it's insulting, and... And it's a vaginal scrape? I'm sorry? Well, you said it was a very. Maginal scrape. Yes, a pap smear is a very intense scraping of the female genitalia.

And you scrape the vagina walls, and I call them Tony Papsmere. And now I think it's even funnier. He-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-he-h-h-h-h-h--------------. Okay, you need to stop the motherfucking giggles, okay? Oh, oh, that, what was that? You're getting on my nerves, child. Now, you can't call people in your class pap smear, okay? Well, have you ever had a pap smear, Dr. Debbie?

Yes, I had one. Did you? That's none of your goddamn business, okay? Sounds like you're getting worked up, Dr. Debbie. Look, you can't call people mean names. Now, are there other children in your class that you gave nicknames to? Yes, there was Sarah Clinton, like, Clinton, like the president?

Okay. And did you give her a nickname, like, Candy or Sweetie Pie? No, I called Sarah Clinton Clint nose. I'm sorry? Clint knows? Because it, Clinton sounds like Clint. So I called her Sarah Clintose, and they kicked me out of school, Dr. Debbie Thimer. Okay, you know, you can't call people sexual parts, okay?

That's not how you use it. Do you have any children in your... class that just have a normal name that have no sexual connotation child yes well there's i guess tommy smith okay great now for example Tommy Smith you could just call them T-bird or T-S or smithy I know but that sounds so boring dr. Debbie surely I could get more creative Stop the fucking laughing You sound like someone who set their head slammed in the door of a delicatessent

And someone dumped pastrami on your face Dr. Debbie Stop the giggling Dr. Debbie, that makes no sense Why would someone smash my head? head in a delicatessen door and put pastramium, my face.

Well, if you could hear your own voice, child, I'm sure you'd understand. Now, what is the normal nickname you gave Tommy Smith? Was it T-bird? Was it the smither? Oh, no, I gave Tommy Smith a real fun,

um, nice nickname, Dr. Debbie. Okay, great. What did you give him? Shit fuck, Amos, cunties. Okay, you know what You are an idiot That's what I call him Whatever I see him in the hallway

Hey, there goes shit fuck Anus Cunt dies Hey, ain't shit fuck Okay, you know what You need to go You should be expelled from school Permanently Can I give you a nickname

Dr. Debbie? No, you can't give me a nickname Because you have a lot of D's in your name I do not allow you To give me a nickname Okay, if you say so dildo donkeys dingledong dildo twad okay you know what I'm hanging up on you

because you are mentally ill and you're a dildo dinkist twad okay hang up hang up on her oh my god what an idiot okay we don't want calls like that I'm a professional my name is Dr. Debbie timer and I'm a life coach

I need to go for a break I need to settle down and collect my senses. Yeah, I don't want her calling back. No. That child was borderline mentally ill. Okay, I need to go for a break. We'll be right back. I'm Dr. Debbie Tiver.

Daniel! Daniel! Daniel! Look at me! I'm over here. Damien, I love you. Look at me, Damien. It's all for you.

The Harland Highway. Question of the day. Okay, this is a weird one, but when isn't it weird on this podcast? Oh, oh, oh, oh, um, hey everybody, who wants to have better sex? No, yes, yes. The answer is yes. You always want to have better sex. That's what, you want it to be better, not worse. Trust me. And Adam and Eve is offering 50% off just about any item plus free shipping. And more than that, Adam and Eve wants to make your life easy. They offer discrete shipping as your privacy is a priority, plus 100% free shipping. on your entire order, doesn't matter how much you spend or what you buy, all will be packaged

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Have fun. Don't throw your back out. The question of the day is, have you ever walked out of your front door and found something weird and unusual laying in front of your door. Whether somebody put something there, whether something landed there, whether somebody pranked you, whether the wind blew something there, whether the delivery guy put something there.

Have you ever found something really odd right at your front door, like right where you walk out, right by the welcome mat. I've had, and I'm not kidding, I live in California, so I've had, I've walked out my front door and seen a scorpion sitting right at my front door. I've had a tarantula right at my front door. I've had like birds that have smashed into the window right at my front door. But one of the weirdest things happened just a couple of days ago, I walked out my front door and there was a collection of guts on the ground right by my welcome mat.

And when I say guts, I don't know what they were the guts of. You ever clean out a turkey or clean a fish and you got like the giblets or you got the heart and the liver and the organs? Yeah, so I walk out of my place and I look down on the ground and there's like little chunks of meat and it looked like some kind of a liver and there was a little like looked like little intestines and I don't know if it was from a little a rat or a mouse or a bird. I don't know what the hell happened outside my front door. while I was sleeping. It was bizarre to me. And it's not just one little thing. It's like four or five clumps of meat.

And I go, okay, what is this? I looked around. There's no feathers. There was no fur. I couldn't do any detective work. I couldn't tell if it was rat fur or rabbit fur or gopher fur. I could, I saw no feathers. Usually when something attacks a bird,

there's always like a clump of feathers. around. There's usually some telltale little tufts of fur if there's been an animal attack. But this was bizarre. It was just, I thought, did somebody come and clean a turkey? Is someone, one of my neighbors getting ready for Thanksgiving or Christmas early? And they were cleaning their turkey and just threw their giblets at my front door. And, you know, the ants were starting to crawl all over. these guts and it's just a kind of a morbid thing to wake up to suddenly you're on a crime scene it's like you're walking out the door to go to work and then suddenly you

step on a kidney you slip on a rabbit liver suddenly you're at it's you're in the middle of CSI Miami or something you know you got your mind on your day you're focusing, you know, I got to go do some work, I got to go to a meeting, suddenly you're in Rubik's Cube mode, where you turn into a forensic scientist and you're trying to piece together the body parts. Well, let's see, I have a kidney here. I've got a spleen over here. I've got a small intestine, and it looks like a set of lungs. Now, if I just place these all together, Hold on Oh, hang on

Put this over here Oh my God, it's a baby boy I mean suddenly you're like Frankenstein You're trying to figure out What, how can I put these pieces together And make it come to life It was very bizarre So I don't know if you guys have ever had something weird

At your front door Most of my little weird things have been like nature-related, but I'm sure some of you have had weird things like gifts from boyfriends or girlfriends or girlfriends or lovers or husbands or wives or friends playing pranks. If you've ever had anything strange in front of your door when you wake up in the morning, call in and share. I want to hear now that I've had a dismembered mystery body

in front of my door. I want to hear, I know that you guys must have some stuff. So call me 323-739-4330, and please share your weird front-door mystery stories. And that is the Harland Highway Question of the Day. The Harland Highway, question of the day. On to something a little more serious that's been irritating the hell out of me, these Iran-American nuclear talks, okay, I think the consensus worldwide is that if Iran were to get nuclear bombs, it would probably lead to World War III or it would lead to a lot of trouble. all right we're talking about a country that to this day declares they want to wipe Israel off the face of the earth um they are you know they are a troublesome country to say the least now that being said the only

reason i'm saying that is from what i watch and learn in the media now you got to go how much do you trust the media what if the media is fabricating all this stuff i mean uh i Iran's over on the other side of the world. Who knows? I'm not there. But if you look at Iran's track record with, you know, the hostage-taking crisis under the presidency of Jimmy Carter, you look at the ongoing threats that Iran has perpetrated in the region over there. When you look at the lengthy war they had with Iraq and so on and so on. You know, there's probably a lot of truth to, you know, Iran being a rebel and rogue country.

But nonetheless, regardless of how accurate, the media portrays them, I think it's probably in everyone's best interest that another country, especially a Middle Eastern country where there just always seems to be so much. you know, turmoil, I think we would all benefit by another Middle Eastern country not getting, acquiring a nuclear bomb. And it befuddles me that we're sitting down and negotiating this with this country that, you know, on the surface, from what it seems, can be very deceptive and not trustworthy. And as I said, as a track record of not being.

very friendly towards, you know, the West and other parts of the world that they disagree with. And so I don't get it why a country as powerful as we are even spends the time negotiating. And I get it. It's all diplomatic, and it's like you can't just tell other countries how to be or what to do. I respect that. But when it comes to a bad kid in the neighborhood and you give him a gun, it's just you just don't give the kid that chance. Okay, let's say you lived on a street and everyone was really friendly, you know, like beaver cleaver.

And down at the end of the street was a guy with a really long rap sheet and he was a troublemaker and he was violent and he'd threatened the whole neighborhood and said, I'm going to kill some of you people and I'm going to light your houses on fire and I hate you and, you know, I'm going to kidnap your kids. Do you walk down to the end of the street and go, hey, buddy, how would you like a loaded gun?

You know, we know you're troubled. We know you, but, you know, you're an American. You deserve a loaded shotgun. And how about a basket of grenades? Can we give you those? And we're just going to count on you to never use them against the rest of the street, all the leave it to beaver, Aussian Harriet people here who don't want any trouble. So it seems like to allow Iran to acquire a nuclear bomb,

you're just sitting yourself up for trouble. Whatever your political line is, you know, well, hey, man, everyone's allowed. the country should be able to do what they want and you know, it's a free world why should the United States police the world, man. You know, Iran's their own entity. Yeah, true.

But do you want to ignore their rhetoric? Do you want to ignore the things they've said, the threats they've made? Why do you want to even give them the chance? Look, if they don't have a nuclear bomb, they're still going to carry on as Iran.

They're still going to move on down the road. as Iran going about their daily business. So I don't think a nuclear arsenal changes them waking up every morning. You're going to the market and living and breathing and eating and shopping and sleeping. So I don't think it's wise to allow the troublemaker to get a loaded gun.

So why are we sitting down negotiating? and here we are the most powerful entity on the planet who even if you're one of these conspiracy people that think the United States is evil and we're just forcing our will on everyone well at least we're trying to if we do force our will on people we're trying to do it for reasons of being good

for instilling freedom into the planet It's not like we have a communist agenda We have a radical Islam agenda You know If we do push our way in We try to hand people the keys And the tools

To create their own diplomatic And their own diplomatic government Their own freedom And think about it, man. Think about the world as a house. And in the house, there's a bunch of kids, and you've got to have two parents, a mother and a father.

And for whatever reason, maybe it's because we have the most money, maybe it's because we have the most logic, maybe we have the most weapons. I don't know. But somehow we've been appointed the father figure, maybe the mother and the father figure. And if you don't have someone laying down laws in the house, if you don't have someone trying to create order and rules,

you know the end result, man. The kids just go run amok and everything falls to crap. And so it feels like just by default, the USA, because we have so much power, kind of have to monitor the rest of the world. I don't really like it. I don't like it that we have to go into Vietnam and Iraq and Afghanistan. And you could say, well, we don't have to. And we don't have to.

But there's times when we've done it to try and help, you know, shape the world, try and help civilizations and cultures find their freedom. And it's not pretty. It's not easy. It's war. It's ugly. It's, we have to. obviously impose some of our will and our way onto them.

But at the end of the day, I feel like it's like you're trying to help them at least find the pathway to a more civilized way of living, or bombs aren't going off in the marketplace every day, and people aren't chopping each other's heads off because of their religion. Is the United States perfect? No, but boy, oh boy, if you want to point the first. finger at the U.S., go ahead, but, you know, you show me other places in the world that are better. I mean, there's some that are equal, but man, in these countries where everything's upside down and violent, and so it kind of burns me up that we're sitting there negotiating with this problem

child, Iran, and not just going, hey, you know what, you're not having a nuclear bomb, period. So you keep kicking the crib and keep banging your head against the wall. It ain't happening. Here's the negotiation, okay? You sit down at the table, you say, hey, Iran, how you doing? Arwood, doing pretty good. Good. Here's the negotiation.

Do you like mushroom soup? Yes, I like mushroom soup. Do you like mushroom omelets? Yes, I like mushroom omelets. Do you like mushroom clouds? I beg your pardon? Do you like mushroom clouds? I don't think so.

Well, that's what you're going to get if you try and build a nuclear bomb. Okay? You're going to get some mushroom clouds, and it'll be bye-bye time because the rest of the world doesn't have time for your rhetoric and your bullshit. We love you. We want you to live peacefully with the rest of the planet. But we'll be damned if we're going to put a bomb that could destroy parts of the world in your hands.

So it just ain't happening. That's the end of the negotiation. Thanks for showing up. We'll see you later, and you're never going to have a bomb, ever, period. But wait a minute, do we want to talk? No, Don. There. Now, do you see why, folks, that I should be the president of the United States?

Did you see how quickly that took, what, a minute? Took a minute for me to negotiate with Iran or any other crazy country that wants nuclear bombs. You're like, oh, yeah, there you go, flexing that American muscle. Well, sometimes you got to, okay? Germany got out of hand. What did we do? We kicked their ass. They fell in line, and now they're our friends, and we do business with them.

and they've got a civilized culture over there. Sadly, I don't like it that it happened. We had to drop bombs on Japan. They got the mushroom clouds. Guess what? They cleaned up the rack real fast. They haven't been a problem since, and we're friends with them, we're allies,

and we're trading partners. And they got the message. And I know it's tough to sit here and go, we don't have any right. But you know what? Who's going to do it if we don't, huh? You think you're just going to, like, sit and talk to people? You think people with an evil agenda really want to sit down and just, let's talk this out. Sometimes you just have to flex the muscle and say, hey, you know what?

You step out of line. You're going to get it. Okay? End the story. It's like disciplining a kid. You know what, Billy? I told you not to play in the garden. Now you're getting a spanking.

Guess what? Billy doesn't play in the garden anymore when he's not supposed to. There's a time to be soft and sensitive and negotiate and there's a time to just go, uh-uh. You guys are causing too much bullshit. So here's the law.

It's just not happening. You're done. You know, it's probably a bullheaded approach, but who cares? It's worked in the past. And sometimes, sadly, the people under the oppression of these crazy leaders have to pay the price in order for their society, their civilization, to move forward. Look, look at how many innocent people probably got their asses. has bombed in World War II

probably millions I mean the United States and the Allied forces carpet bombed you know carpet bombed all of Germany friggin Japan you know

hundreds and hundreds of thousands were obliterated in the in the blink of an eye when the mushroom bombs went off and it's horrible, but because war was perpetrated by their leaders, they had to pay the ultimate price. There's always collateral damage in war. Let's not forget how many of our guys got slaughtered in the war.

Okay? It doesn't work just one way. But sometimes you just got to put that foot down, man. and you can fight about it, you can go back and forth all you want, all the time. Try to justify it. But at the end of the day, you got to remember there's a house that needs to be run. Bills need to be paid. Things got to get cleaned.

Things got to get repaired. And if you're busy just letting everyone run amok, the house falls apart, and there ain't no more house anymore. And unfortunately, that's what we have to deal with. That's what the United States and the UK and the, you know, Australia and Canada, all the more civilized countries in the world have to police the ones that are full of turmoil. So I don't know if you agree with that or not, but I don't know what else to do. all this sitting around and, you know, soft talking. Why?

Why even entertain it? Why give them a glimmer of hope? Why encourage them? It's just, no, you're not making a bomb, period. You try to make a bomb. Things are going to blow up. It doesn't end well for you. Period.

Doesn't that seem like a lot quicker and easier and less expensive and more direct, as opposed to these ambiguous, long-winded, multi-detailed, so-called deals that the two governments make that are full of clauses and things run out at a certain time and you can do this, but you can't do that. And, you know, there's so many moving pieces to the documents. How do you monitor all of them? How do you keep your eye on them? They just get lost and muddy, and that's probably part of Iran's agenda

to create so much bureaucracy and red tape that you really don't know what's going on, and you don't have the time, the money, or the energy to follow up on a complicated agreement. But you know what's not complicated? This. hey you know what iran you're not getting a bomb if you try things are going to blow up real quick boom clean easy out

don't know if you agree with it but I'm offering up my two cents there you go the harland highway crazy news story that's weird that's strange stuff okay here it is Let's end the show. That was a little heavy, I know, talking about the Iran nuke deal. But, you know, it's bugging the hell out of me, so I had to get it out there. Let's end on a crazy news story that this one made me laugh the second I read the headline. You ready for the headline?

Arkansas judge. Okay, we're talking about a judge. Malled. You ready? By family's pet zebra. Huh? How does a judge end up near a zebra? Well, apparently, this Arkansas judge remains in a Little Rock hospital after he was attacked by his family's pet zebra authority said.

What the, they were all out of cats and kittens and puppies down at the pet shop? Well, I think we need a zebra. We certainly do need a zebra. The man was attacked Sunday night by a zebra owned by his father, said a police spokesman. In White County, northeast of Little Rock, they identified the man as state district judge Mike Derek. The court's clerk office confirmed to the Associated Press that Derek sustained injuries to an eye and an arm. Authorities wouldn't discuss details of the attack, including any explanation for why a family,

and here's the big one, happen to own and maintain a zebra on private property. What? Police said they were pursuing no action because the incident appeared to be an accident involving an animal legally owned by the family. Boy, oh boy. I mean, what the hell?

Since when does zebras go after eyes? I mean, I don't even think like a horse. Horses don't even go after eyes. What's with zebras? These guys are smart. And to attack a judge, I mean, you know, maybe attack a farmhand or, you know, a kid on a bicycle. But to go after the county judge, what, you're just asking for jail time, Zebra? I guess it's fitting because the zebra's already wearing that jail uniform, right?

The black and white striped jumpsuit? He's ready to go to jail. But then I'm wondering what the hell was the judge? What could get a zebra so upset? And I started thinking, uh-oh, uh-oh, I hope the judge wasn't, uh, you know, trying to have a little hanky-panky with the old zeal. Because, you know, there's these people that get into bestiality, and, you know, a zebra's a fine, fine-looking animal. I mean, you know, it's got those lines, and it's very beautiful.

It's mesmerizing and hypnotize you with its stripes. Dare I say seduce you with its stripes. Maybe the judge was seduced and got lustful. And the zebras are, yo, you better back off. I'm going to bite you right in the eye, player. Oh, don't you put your arm up inside me? I'll snap that arm right off. I'll bite you in the eye.

Yeah. So, you know, maybe just stick to a little wiener dog or a hamster on a wheel. If you've got to get a little wild, maybe a ferret. But really a collie. or a poodle or a Labardoodle. I don't know that you need a wild African member of the wild horse family prancing around in your yard. Okay? And if you're going to, I think what we learned from this,

if you're going to go out and goof around with a zebra, wear safety goggles. Wear some damn safety goggles and maybe some hockey gloves or something. So there you go. That's your wacky news story of the day. We're going to hang it up right there. Because I don't think we can get any whackier than that, can we? Well, I don't think so.

But let's do some announcements while we're here, shall we, gang? I think we should. I really think we should. What do we got coming up? Oh, my God, I'm going to be in Halifax, Nova Scotia, on Wednesday night, April 22nd. Doing one show only at the Halifax Comedy Festival. That is going to be a blast at a big beautiful theater.

Oh, you got to come out for that. And then the very next day, I'll be at Comics. Comics Comedy Club at the Foxwood Casino in Connecticut. Comics with an X, C-O-M-I-X. Great club. I'm going to be kicking it up there So get your tickets That's April 23rd to the 25th

And then after that I scoot on up on May 1st To Ottawa, Ontario, Canada Yes, I'm going to Ottawa I'll be at yuck yucks in Ottawa Friday, May 1st And Saturday, May 2nd And then the next

next weekend, May 7th through 10th, I will be at a great comedy club called Helium in Buffalo, New York. Now, I've never done stand-up comedy in Buffalo, New York. This is a very first time for me, so I'm very excited. For those of you that have been dying to see me do stand-up in your neck of the woods there in Buffalo, this is your chance. get your tickets online at harlough williams.com and then to end out the month of May on May 21st

through the weekend I will be in San Diego, California, at the American Comedy Co. Great club. I love it down there. So there you go. A lot of stand-up stuff coming up. And we're going to have a lot of fun.

So get your sweet biscuits out there. Don't forget you can call and leave messages for me on the hotline, 3233739, 43330, or you can write to me at harlewilums.com. And I might read your letter or play your phone call on the show. I always love to hear from you guys. Tell your friends to get on the highway. Let them join in on the fun. and that's it.

Check out the store when you're at harlunwilms.com and also check out my YouTube channel. Please subscribe to my YouTube channel when you go to the website, harlewilms.com. It's absolutely free. All you do is click subscribe and you're in. And every time I post a new video, you get to see it for free.

And of course, right now we're posting, trying to post every Monday, five new minutes of my crazy indie movie Fudgy Wudgy Fudge Face And if you like twisted, demented comedy movies You'll like this And you'll get to see that fresh five minutes every week So there you go

Thanks for being here folks Great to have you along Always a pleasure Hope you're getting ready for your spring and your summer And we'll try and keep you chucking all the way through. So until next time, chicken. Chalman, baby.