The Harland Highway - 694 - Let's talk about TRUMP baby!!!

Episode Date: August 17, 2015

On this show I offer up my thoughts and observations about Donald Trump and the American political system. Bump in the Trump!!!! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Two divided by love can only be one and one is a lonely number. Two divided by love can only be sad can only hurt one another. What's the difference between a wet raccoon and Donald J. Trump's hair? A wet raccoon doesn't have $7 billion in the back Well, here we go, gang If you're a fan of Donald Trump Or you're not a fan of Donald Trump

I've been just loving this guy And I can't keep my mouth shut any longer I've been following, you know, the election I know we're early into it Anything could happen But I'm just kind of Gonna put the whole Trump fiasco in my own words and talk about the political system.

And this show's a little more serious. It deals more with politics and the infrastructure and the phenomenon that is Donald Trump. So I hope you enjoy it. It's not so much comedy-driven as it's kind of politics and observations and, you know, train of thought and things like that.

So here we go. Let's call this the Donald Trump show on the Harland Highway. What a great honor it must be for you to honor me tonight Ladies and gentlemen I'd like to introduce The Harland Highway I promise you

I will please you all Believe me What is he life What's he funny Anyway Oh He's an angel He's an angel

He's an angel Strut from nothing You're gonna need a bigger pose You're listening to Harland Williams Why don't you give me a name And a face And a reason why You know what do you expect

The guy of just It's over, Jenny. It's over. Nothing is over! You just don't turn it off! You just made a wrong turn. On to the Harland Highway. Weird.

It's just plain weird. You know what I mean? I'm still alive. I'll tell you what I won't give you, you muckers! I won't give you the satisfaction of saying that I'm sorry! Welcome to the Harland Highway. Oh, you get your money for us. Believe me. If I decide to run, you'll have the great pleasure of voting for the man that will easily go down as the greatest president in the history of the United States.

Me, Donald John Trump. Well, I can't keep my mouth shut any longer, gang. Boy, oh boy, how about Donald John Trump? Okay, and I'm talking to all you liberals, all you Democrats, all you Republicans, all you everybody I'm asking you to put all your politics to the side for one second or a couple of minutes here and let's talk about a guy who is electrifying the public, electrifying the media, electrifying the voters,

electrifying everything. His polls are jumping through the roof. And I'm not surprised. You know, I did a thing, I wish I had it with me. I got to go back and find it, but I did a thing about the last election and Barack Obama and Mitt Rom. And I talked about how Mitt Romney was afraid of his wealth.

He never talked about how he was wealthy and how he was rich and how he had done well and how he was great with money and how that was a bonus. But he was afraid to come out and use it as a weapon in his campaign. And here's Trump just saying, I'm worth billions and billions of dollars. And here's what I'm going to do. I'm worth many billions of dollars. And I'm going to put up a wall. and I'm going to get the Mexicans to pay for it and I'm going to stop illegal immigration

and I'm going to kick China in the ass and I'm going to kick ISIS in the ass and blah blah blah blah blah blah and he's going on and on about everything and I love it I love this guy now for those of you that right now are going oh no Arland first of all don't talk politics

and second of all the guy's a joke are you serious dude well guess what he's not a joke He's a joke because you're being manipulated into thinking he's a joke. He's a loser. He's a reality show carnival freak because you're listening to all the sound bites from the smug pretentious talking heads in the news and in the papers and in the media that want you to think that way. So that's why I'm saying put all your politics away and put away all the rhetoric and everything and just look at a guy. whose motto, whose campaign stance is,

I want to make America great again. I said it, I don't know which podcast, probably a couple if you go back. I said, what this country needs is a guy that can just drop the bullshit and be honest with people and just talk like a real guy and be charismatic and dynamic and not be afraid of his success and be a guy that calls shit as he sees it and all the stuff that we deserve. Honesty.

And a guy that takes questions, he's unscripted. A guy that if someone calls him out, he says, okay, what about it? You know, someone didn't like his tone on one of his, one of his press interviews. And he's like, the world's going to hell in a handbasket, and you're worried about my tone? Exactly.

And everyone that's come out and try to burn him and beat him up, well, guess what? He's kicked him right back in the balls. Don't you want a fighter? Don't you want a guy that doesn't take anyone's bullshit? Don't you want a guy that if you hit him, hit you right back even harder? Don't you want a guy whose country,

where a country is going to hell because bad deals are being made. The economy sucks. Everything, all manufacturing and jobs are going off shores to China to India to Mexico. Here's a guy saying, I'm going to bring all that crap back because, by the way, that's what I do. I'm good at business. I'm good at making deals. I wrote a best-selling book called The Art of the Deal. I'm relentless.

I'm crafty. I'm skillful. I don't take note for an answer. You don't push me around. And as the president of the United States of America, you don't push America around. Now, if you can peel away all your bullshit about being a Republican or a Democrat, and by the way, I've always told you guys, I'm in the middle. If Donald Trump was on the Democratic side saying all this same stuff or even something close,

I'd be like, yes! He happens to be doing it on the Republican side, okay, yes! But look at it. his motto, I want to make America great again, because let's face it, everyone. Look in the mirror. Be honest. Do you think America's as great as it used to be? Do you think America's as great as it could be? No. There's a lot of crooked shit. There's a lot of politicians just spinning their web of rhetoric and bullshit. You could interchange any one of them on either side, and it's the same stuff. Quoting numbers and statistics.

and I'm going to do this, but I'm not really going to do that because I don't want to upset them, but let's talk about it. I'm neither here nor there on immigration, but let's create amnesty and let's make sanctuary cities and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And by the way, Donald Trump even said it, and we all know what all these other politicians are being funded by special interest groups. All these politicians are puppets at the mercy of these special interest groups that want something for their investment.

And I've never seen such a tepid bunch of people. You know, Jeb Bush, you know, they asked him, you know, what do you think about how your brother went into Iraq? Do you support what he did? Oh, yes, that's my brother. I support it. Well, the media went nuts. Nobody liked

the answer. And two days later, he came out, he goes, you know what, I don't support it. I don't support what my own brother did, even though I just said it. And why did he do that? Because he's been bought and paid for. He's worried.

He's so worried. All these politicians are like people walking across thin ice. You know, they're afraid to commit any answers. They talk in circles. They never give direct answers. And they create these bullet point bullshit things like Hillary Clinton with a war on women. She's going back to that old well. She's going back to the one percenters.

When this woman has a net worth of like $45 million, she makes $500 grand for a speaking engagement. She's, apparently she's hidden some tax dollars. She's under a criminal investigation by the FBI for lying about having her own email server with top secret classified emails. And all you people that are Democrat are going to go blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. blah, blah, that's not true. It was this, it was that.

Well, get over it. Quit, quit standing up for the, for the crooked people. Quit making your dedication to your party line more important to having real people with integrity and a backbone and being truthful and standing up for you and being accountable. Why are you so married to a party? You ever, you ever hear of the Church of Scientology? You ever hear of cultish religions? ask yourself people

are you just blindly following party lines because it's the party doesn't that make you a fucking moron doesn't that make you an idiot doesn't that make you a blind sheep being led by a bunch of puppet masters and I'm talking about both sides believe me I've always said

if you've ever listened to this podcast, I've always said, you know, I always sit in the middle and I listen and I look and I pick the person that I believe in the most, who's being the most real, and I base voting off of the person, not the party. If you just follow a party, aren't you blind? Are you telling me you love everything your party does? Are you fighting for your party? Let me ask you this. When you have arguments with your friends about politics, is it really your voice?

Did you sit up in the library and research your party? Did you sit up in the library and research your politicians and all their policies? Aren't you really just spouting the regurgitated crap that you hear on the news and that all your buddies who are in the same party spout because you want to feel like you belong somewhere, you want to feel like you're intelligent, you want to feel like you're part of a collective group. Can I ask you something?

Do you even know what the hell you're talking about, what you're standing up for, what you believe in? Seriously, ask yourself, that look in the mirror, stand in front of the mirror, and do I really know what my party's about? Why am I following my party? What are they offering that the other one is? What are they doing that it's such a blurry line, guys and gals?

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item. It could be an adventurous new toy or anything you desire. Just enter the offer code Harland to check out. That's Harland, H-A-R-L-A-N-D at Adam and Eve.com. This is an exclusive offer specific to this podcast. So be sure to use this code Harland so you get your discount and 100% free shipping. Code Harland. Have fun. Don't throw your back out. There's a lot of manipulation and cattle herding going on, and it's been going on. And a lot of you have been duped. I hate to say it. I'm not standing on a soapbox saying, I'm smarter than you, or I know more than you, or blah, blah, blah.

But if you just go along blindly, towing the line, regurgitating quotes and soundbites and ideals and political, positions from your friends and your buddies and the president at work and your boss and the guys down at the racket club? Who are you? Do you have a mind? Do you have a brain? Can you think for yourself? I know. I'm being harsh. I'm dragging down the hammer and then you guys go, oh, you're one to talk. Are you like Donald Trump? It doesn't matter that it's Donald Trump. I like a guy. who stands up and is accountable and is proud of his accomplishments and rubs them in your face because what's wrong with being associated with success, everybody? Haven't you ever heard that saying, you know, if you want to be successful,

hang around with other successful people, you'll learn a lot? I mean, what's wrong with it? Isn't the part of, not the full American dream, but isn't part of the American dream to aspire to be as big and as great as you can? Isn't that why people flock to this country? Isn't that something that you believe deep down inside? If not, you're not aiming very high. Hello? I mean, what do these other guys know?

That Donald Trump doesn't know. Because they've been hanging around in Washington, that they're superiors. superior to Donald Trump? These guys are making deals and negotiating when the truth is Donald Trump's a master negotiator and a dealmaker. That's what he does. He's built an empire, a very successful one. And he's not afraid to get out in front of the people and take their questions and

spout his opinions and speak the hard truth. Are the other guys doing that? No, they dance around like a bunch of fairies at Disney on Ice. They're all terrified to take a stand and make a commitment to anything they say. It's pathetic. They're like whipped dogs with their tails between their legs. And then when half of them do get their hairs up, and I think you'll back me up on this,

when some of them try to get a little tough and kind of start rambling, it almost looks like they're acting. It almost looks like, you know, their campaign manager said, Okay, during the debates, when we get to the 20-minute mark, get heated, but just for two and a half minutes, get mad at one of them, you know, get that angry look in your eye and then back off, take your foot off the gas, take you okay? And that'll leave an impact on the dumb morons that are being let around like sheep. But Trump's just up there calling it as it is. he's using his own money isn't that the kind of guy

we like in America don't we love successful people don't we want someone who's not beholden to the powers that be the silent puppet masters behind the wall don't we want to root for the guy

that made it and that that makes 10 billion has 10 billion dollars to sit on could retire, could float away into the sunset and says, you know what? I'm fucking fed up with this country and the way it's going down the toilet. I don't need the money.

I don't need the hassle. I'm a billionaire. But I can't sit on the sidelines and watch this anymore. I'm stepping out and I'm getting in and I'm going to try and make America better again. I like that, don't you? Or are you still sitting there hiding behind all your political rhetoric?

Oh, now you're probably getting mad at me, but get mad at yourself. Really look inside yourself and go, wait a minute. Maybe I should look in the mirror and ask myself why I'm affiliated with a political party or a political person or a politician. Maybe I really should look at this shit they're telling me and see if it's real. Do you remember the last election with Barack Obama, the one percenters and the war on women and all that stuff? The day after he took office for the second time, did you ever hear about any of that stuff again? No.

It was all gone. It vanished completely into thin air. But now that we're starting up again, guess who's bringing it all back? Hillary Clinton. Hillary Clinton's bringing back the one percenters. Here's a woman who's a multi-multi-millionaire who's being investigated for embezzling $45 million in taxes through her charity.

Okay? Here's a woman who makes more money than most of you will ever see in your lifetime. She can make that in a one-hour speaking engagement. Here's a woman who's talking about, talking about the war on women and when her husband was caught lying and cheating

to the public, she stood in the shadows and said nothing. Did she stand up for women? Did she get in front of the cameras and say, what my husband did is wrong? He cheated on me and he lied in front of the whole world. I'm leaving this fucking low

life loser? No. She hid in the shadows waiting, like a barracuda in the weeds, rubbing her fins together going, I'll eat it, I'll eat it, because I'm going to make a run for president, I want all the power, and I'll do whatever

I have to do to get the power. Boy, she's real concerned about women when she didn't even stand up for women, when her own husband crapped all over her face. Went in front of the whole world and lied.

Said he didn't do any of that stuff, and then they They turned around and blamed it all on Monica Lewinsky. Like somehow she's the culprit. Like, you know, a little young impressionable intern is the one to blame because the most powerful man in the world pulled down his pants and gizzed all over her. That's her fault. He wasn't strong enough to repel her advances.

Not only is he this most powerful man. in the world in the Oval Office. By the way, he was married. Oh, he didn't know how to say no. And by the way, I seriously doubt it was her seducing him. Can you imagine a young, impressionable 18-year-old going, sorry, excuse me, Mr. Clinton, the most powerful man and the President of the United States. Would it be okay if I gave you a blowjob? Do you really think she was the one that initiated it? I'm sure she was so nervous around the guy. You can barely take notes. Do you get the funny feeling, folks, that maybe Bill Clinton was the grease ball that seduced her?

And I don't want to sound like I'm bashing on the Democrats, but it all blows into this same pile of horseshit. Barack Obama comes along and offers us hope. What is hope? Hope is a word. Hope. So is potato. So is pumpkin. So is manure.

It's a word hope. It's very ambiguous. Hope for what? I hope it rains. I hope I get a nice car this Christmas. I hope I get my tax refund back early. Hope for what? What did we all hope for?

It's just a con job. It's just an empty, ambiguous word. Hope. And everyone, all the sheep got led down the pasture to the slaughter. house. Now, let me ask you this, are you confused by Donald Trump's slogan? I just want to make America great again. Is there any ambiguity there? Is there any confusion, ladies and gentlemen? I think we know we could use a butt lift and a tummy tuck and a boob injection. There's a lot of bad stuff going on in the States. I don't.

don't think people necessarily walk around and feel super proud the way they used to, because everything's all over the place. The government's breaking laws. The government's not enforcing the laws. The government's making bad deals. The government's given away our money. The government's making deals with countries that want to build a nuclear bomb and hate our guts. And by the way, we gave them $130 billion and the nuclear deal. I mean, look, I'm not a politician. I'm not a news guy. I don't know all the ins and outs. But what I do know is I like it, and this is just me, you don't have to like it. I like it when a guy or a girl come along from any party or even a new party

and just starts telling it like it is and turns the system on its head, an antiquated political system that's just the same old recipe rehash playbook. You ever see videotapes of coaches and football lockers or hockey lockers and they draw on the chalkboard and they pull out their little book and they go, okay, now we're going to do the triple reverse throwback play, guys. John, you're going to go down field. Eddie, you're going to cut left. Bill, you're going to go deep into the pocket.

We're going to throw. That's the playbook. You ever see a chef open a recipe book? First you add the palsley, then you add the ox blood, and then you add some butter. You fry the butter, you filet the salmon, you lay it down, and you add some chives and some creamy potatoes on the side. This is your recipe.

That's what these politicians do, gang. You know that. You don't need me to tell you they got their playbooks. and they got their coaches and they got their recipes and you're all being fed the shitty meal and watching the same game over and over. So am I an asshole? Am I a dummy to like a guy that comes along

and just speaks from the cuff, speaks from the heart? And by the way, has the experience and the financial and business know-how to make deals, handle large amounts of money, be tough, kick people in the balls when they kick him in the balls, scare people a little?

They're like, well, he's never been in politics. He doesn't know anything. Do you think these other morons you watch know anything? What do they know? Is anything getting done? Let's say they do know it all, which they don't. Do they know it all because they say they know it all? Still nothing's getting done every year.

So what good does it do even if they do know it all? because they don't and sometimes and this is what makes America great you need a shit disturb you need someone to come along and shake up the status quo you need someone to just grab the bag

and shake it and everyone's screaming and they don't know what to do and suddenly you got a renegade and a rebel who says you know what this old fucking system blows it's broken everyone running this company is a moron let's try something else.

Win or lose, fail or succeed. I'd rather see someone try than just to repeat the same old thing. It's horrible. I think I'd do a really good job. I think I'd protect this country. I mean, don't you want someone fresh and invigorating?

I mean, you know, Jimmy Carter was a peanut farmer. He became president. Ronald Reagan made B movies. He did movies with chimpanzees, and he became a great president. What is so wrong with this guy who has a lot of talent and experience and balls

standing up for the U.S. and trying to become the president when everyone else seems to be doing such a shitty job? And you can go, oh, Barack Obama was great, but prove it. You know, he really wasn't. He really isn't. He's done a few things Like every president have George Bush really wasn't

You know, they all have a few little things But no one talks the way Donald Trump is No one's got the bravado And the ego And what sounds like The determination To get in there and try and make a difference Why not, man?

It ain't going so well with everyone else I thought America liked these types of guys and I got to tell you it makes me sick watching the media they're so smug and they're so

self-righteous and pretentious you know they all sit there and they go well this is a side show this is a reality show carnival and you know there's a certain demographic on the lower end of the laity, dotty, da, party. And these people are getting excited by this rhetoric.

But he'll never blah, blah, blah, blah. Like, they just write him off. Like, he's not good enough for us. Like, folks, he's an American. Any American should be able to run. Do you really want one of these old stale politicians that just give us the same old crap over and over again? Be honest.

even if you like Hillary, or you like, you know, you like Markerubio, or you like, you know, Chris Christie, or you like any of them. Aren't they just the same person over and over again? I don't know, Donald is coming out of the gate with some big ideas, some crazy ideas. And by the way, with the Mexico thing, he never said Mexicans were all rapists and murderers. He said Mexico is sending rapist and murderers and bad people, which they are. You've seen the stories about the murders from the illegal aliens. If Donald Trump, if I thought for one second that Donald Trump hated Mexicans and was calling them all racist,

I would not be supporting them one iota. I don't want a racist. And if you really think that's who Donald Trump is, a guy that's smart, that successful, is going to come out and say that? And even if he said it by mistake that, would you believe it? I don't think so. If I believed it, if I even thought for a second, he was at towards any race of people, I wouldn't be talking about him now. I'd say the guy's a jerk and I won't even give him the time of day. But don't we like these real politicians that buck the system

and turn everything up on its ass and really kind of get behind what people really want to hear and speak from the heart? Having there been all kinds of movies made where we see the politician who's tired of being bought and paid for and pushed around and manipulated and he goes off book? And suddenly everyone loves him because they go, that's a real guy.

He's a hick, just like one of us. We love that guy. This is Donald Trump. Ladies and gentlemen, gives me a great deal of pleasure to introduce to you that true man of the people, the next governor of the state, Willie Stark. My friends, my friends, my friends, I have a speech here.

It's a speech about what this state needs. There's no need in my telling you what this state needs. You are the state and you know what you need. You over there. Look at your pants. Have they got holes in the knees? Listen to your stomach. Do you ever hear it rumble for hunger?

And you? What about your crops? Did they ever rot in the field because the road was so bad Couldn't get them to market? And you? What about your kids? Are they growing up, ignorant as dirt, ignorant as you, because there's no school for them?

No, I'm not going to reach any speech. But I am going to tell you a story. It's a funny story, so get ready to laugh. What's he up to? Shut. You're ready to bust your sides laughing, because it's sure a funny story. It's about a hick.

A hick like you, if you please. Yeah, like you. He grew up on the dirt roads and the gully washes of a farm. He knew what it was to get up before dawn and get feed and slop and milk before breakfast and then set out before sunup and walked six miles to a one-room slab-sighted schoolhouse. Oh, this hick knew what it was to be a hick, all right. He figured if he was going to get anything done, well, he had to do it himself. So he sat up nights and studied books.

He studied law because he thought he might be able to change things some, for himself and for folks like him. Now, I'm not going to lie to you. He didn't start off thinking about the hicks and all the wonderful things he was going to do for him. No. No, he started off thinking of number one. But something came to him on the way. How he could do nothing for himself without the help of the people. That's what came to him. And it also came to him with a powerful force of God's own lightning back in his home county when the school building collapsed because it was built a politics rotten brick. It killed him mangled a dozen kids. But you know that story. The people were his friends because he fought that rotten brick. and some of the politicians down in the city they knew that

so they rode up to his house in a big fine shiny car and said as how they wanted him to run for governor and he swatted it he looked in his heart and he thought in all humility how he'd like to try and change things he was just a country boy who thought that even the plainest, poorest man can be governor if his fellow citizens find

he's got the stuff for the job or those fellas in the striped pants they saw that hick and they took him in Willie, what are you trying to... There he is. There's your Judasus Carriot. Look at him. Lick Spittle, nose wipe him. Look at him. Hide! Hi! Hi, hey!

He'll have him! Look at him! That's a lie! Look at him! Huckie! Or! Huckie! Look at him! Look at him! Look at him! Now, shut up! Shut up, all of you! Now listen to me, you're Hicks. Yeah, you're Hicks, too, and they fools you a thousand times just like they fooled me. But this time I'm going to fool somebody. I'm going to stay in this race. I'm on my own and I'm out for blood.

Now listen to me, you, Hick. Listen to me and lift up your eyes and look at God's blessed and unfly-blown truth. And this is the truth. You're a Hick. And nobody ever helped a Hick with a Hick himself. All right, listen to me, listen to me. How in the Hick they were going to use to split the Hig vote? But I'm standing right here now on my hind legs.

Even a dog can learn to do that. Are you standing on your hind legs? Have you learned to do that much yet? Here it is. Here it is. Yeah, Hicks. Nail up anybody who stands in your way. Nail up Joe Harrison.

Nail up McMurphy. And if they don't deliver, give me to have her and I'll do it myself. Isn't that him? Isn't that the guy we're all rooting for? Isn't that the guy that saw how corrupt and how stale and how fixed the system is and he decided to throw away the playbook

and the recipe book and the speeches and the team around them and the advisors and the people and he got up there and he spoke to the people as a person do we really want to just call that a carnival freak show? Do we want to just call that a carnival freak show?

dispel that because the assholes in the media are labeling him that? The pretentious self-righteous talking heads that think they know better?

Well, talk is cheap, gang, and I don't see them putting their money on the line and their time and their love and their passion for their country. So who knows? I'm just throwing it out there. I've spent a lot of time on almost, in fact, the whole show.

I think it's interesting. And even more than then how I think it's amazing that Donald Trump is shaking up the system, even more important is, I hope you take the time to look inwards at yourself and break away from the pablum that's being served to you and almost forced down your throat and brainwashing you and really think.

I'm not asking you to love Donald Trump or even support him or vote for him, but let's go back in time and remember what made America great. What makes America great is individuals. Is sole individuals that have the determination and the gift and the power to make real change? I don't know. Do you want to give that a chance? Do you want to even be open to it? Is there a law somewhere that says a guy with a big personality and a wacky hairdo like Donald Trump isn't allowed to try and be your president and try and make this country great again and make life better for you? Do we want to disregard all his intelligence and his wealth and his knowledge and his skill? You don't think he could bring that to a world platform and make the rest of the world stand up and listen and respect him?

I have, you know, one thing you can say about Donald Trump, if you've ever watched him or you've ever watched his show The Apprentice or you've ever watched him on the news giving a speech, the guy sort of commands respect. he has a sense of authority around him he has a sense of don't fucking mess with me to him well at the same time having a great sense of humor able to laugh at himself but he he's got that he's got that fire where you got to ask the question based on the things he's saying would he be the guy would he be a competent leader could he be any way worse than all the asswads that we're seeing now from both sides running? In summation, I'd just say, you know, whether you like Donald Trump or not, look into your own soul, look into your own heart, into your own intelligent brain, and really know

where you're being led. In fact, I encourage you not to be led at all. Why do you want to be led into a political arena, into a political affiliation? Why don't it just make up your own mind? Are you scared what your friends might say? Are you afraid you might be exiled from the group? Do you think you'll be shunned? What is that?

That's like, you know, thought police. That's like, you know, the group pack mind meldement. The last time I looked, aren't you an individual? Are you afraid to voice your own opinion for whoever your choice may be? You shouldn't be. And so in closing, I say, I like guys like Donald Trump because they not only shake up the system. They remind us. They remind me and you.

Whether Donald Trump fails or succeeds, they remind us. that the world revolves around people and people with fire and determination and heart. And that systems always break down, and it's always someone, someone with a higher vision that comes in and finds solutions and repairs. So there you go.

Donald Trump so far I'm liking it who knows in two weeks I could be oh my god what a mistake I made but the things I'm saying now I stand by I hope you don't roll your eyes and go oh god politics Harlan's lost it he loves Donald Trump

well if you're going to roll your eyes at me and point the finger who do you love what's your story can you can you stand up here and point to any politician on the presidential stage right now and tell me they're any better i don't think so so what the hell man it's it's america gang lighten up enjoy it embrace that there's a guy in there shaking up the norm. That's what America does, man.

America kicks ass. America surprises you. America makes you turn your head. America makes you go, wow, I didn't think that could happen. Or that wasn't supposed to happen yet. Here it is. Just when I thought something was this, here comes America and changes it. Isn't that what we want?

I think we do. So don't be sucked in to the media rhetoric machine. Sit back, enjoy, watch, listen, be smart, and make your own damn decisions. And I'll leave it there. I used up the whole show. I hope you're not mad at me for that gang. But I had to get it out. You know, most of my shows, you get the comedy today.

got on a roll. So there you go. You're fired. So let's do some announcements if you're still listening, if you're still here after all that. I love it. I hope this is why you like my podcast. I can switch from talking about, you know, doing koala voices to having a discussion about politics. Try to keep it interesting for you, gang.

Keep it hopping. Let's do some announcements while we're here. Well, I got your attention. Let's do some announcement, okay? This week, oh, my God, this week I will be at the Irvine Improv in Orange County at the Spectrum. They've constructed a 600-seat comedy club there. It is spectacular. They have an Umani burger inside.

It's a real work of our. It's going to be a great weekend there. Two great opening acts there with me. Hilarious. Eddie DeLesape and Darren Rose. And it's just going to be an all-round killer show. So it's a great way to kind of wind down your summer, have some laughs. Come on out.

The Irvine Improv in just outside of Los Angeles, California. It'll be Thursday, this Thursday, August 20th to August 23rd. on Sunday, two shows Friday, two shows Saturday. Go to Harland Williams.com and click on my stand-up tour link, and it'll take you right to the link where you can buy your ticket. You want to get them because I always pack them in down there in Irvine, and I don't want anyone to be disappointed. And it's really my only stand-up show of this month in August.

So I hope you get down there. Also, while you're on the site, you can call me and leave your comments. Maybe you want to disagree or agree with Trump. Please have an open mind if you leave me comments. Just don't call me up and start arguing about Trump based on all the stuff you've already filtered into your head. If you're going to call me and argue about Trump one way or the other, bad or good, do it based on reassessing your, you know, kind of what you heard here today. Don't just come at me with stuff that you already had planted in your head

that I've already said is stale and probably not even your own opinion. I want to hear from people with well-thought-out, fair-minded opinions based on maybe what they heard here today. So 323-739-4-3-3-0. leave me a message. It's just an answering machine so you don't talk to anyone. You can just leave a message. 3237394330 or while you're at harlomwilliams.com, you can write me.

We have a contact page there and you can send me an email. I might read or play your messages on the show. I always like to hear from you guys. Check out our store while they're there. There's all kinds of fun merchandise you can purchase. We'll mail it out to you. it is a laugh please join me on Periscope

the Periscope app at Harland Williams also join my Twitter at Harlan Williams and subscribe to my YouTube page which you can do down at the bottom of the homepage at Harlan Williams.com So we're going to leave it there How about some final words from Donald Trump

about Rosie O'Donnell who, like I said, Donald doesn't take ship from anybody. And Rosie, when she was on the view, went after Donald and went on this big tirade about his hair and made fun of him and was calling him names. And Donald, in true Donald fashion, said, you know what? Fine. I'm going to hit you right back. And here's what he had to say about her.

Hope you enjoyed the show. And until next time, gang, chicken. Chowman. Babba, baby. Rosie O'Donnell is disgusting. I mean, both inside and out. You take a look at her. She's a slob. She talks like a truck driver. So probably I'll sue her because it would be fun. I'd like to take some money out of her fat-ass pockets. my desire I'm on the head

two divided by love can only be sad to only be broken heart and two divided and blue should take what they have to know back to where I can start too

two divided by love can only be one