The Harland Highway - 738 - Madness at a WAFFLE HOUSE. Tom Green fight. Harland's pets.

Episode Date: February 4, 2016

Today a story about nudeness at a Waffle House! Harland and Tom Green have a fight. Strange stories with strange endings. And Harland remembers his pets. Schvetz da petz!!! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Holy Jumping Crabgrass. Here we go. Here we go. Here we go. It's the Harland Highway podcast. What a show we have for you today, all kinds of wild topics. We had a pavement ponder calling and asked me about my pets if I had any pets. And I have had many pets over the year. So I'm going to talk a bit about my pets. We also have a special clip from Tom Green, actor-comedian Tom Green. We're going to play a sample clip of my other podcast called Let's Have a Fight. You can hear me and Tom going at it, head-to-head verbally, verbal throwdown. Also, I'm going to delve into the world of weird stories. You know, sometimes when you think you know something when you see it,

but then you're not sure and you're confused by it. I know. I'm confused by what I just said. But I'll explain it as we get in. I think it's something that's happened to everybody. Weird stories that are confusing. We'll figure it out. And then lastly, oh my God, a crazy wild news story.

Somebody got naked at a waffle house. Wait do you hear this towards the end of the show? Yeah, that's right. Nudity at a waffle house. It doesn't get any better, except here on the Harland Highway. What is this? Some kind of a joke or something? Welcome to the Harland Highway. What are you talking about Williams?

Son, you got a panty on your head. Shut up and sit down, you big ball fuck. Oh, God, what's happening here? What's happened? Hey, Harlan, it's Shelby. You just made a wrong turn. On to the Harland Highway. We choose to go to the moon in this decade and do the other thing. Not because they are easy, but because they are hard.

That is fantastic. What's wrong with everybody in this crazy place? The Harland Highway. What is it? The opening. To what? To another dimension. This is Harland Williams.

You're a bad man. You're a very bad man. That is fantastic. All right, all right. Let me ask you this. You ever see, you ever have a situation where you think you know a story, but then you don't know a story, are you following me? It's like you're doing something in your everyday life.

And you see an event or you talk to somebody and you're kind of tracking the story. It's like, okay, that guy's going into the store. He's got a shopping cart full of boxes. He's probably returning the boxes. Right? And then, like, you're sitting in your car and you look up 20 minutes later, and the guy comes running out of the store

with a bag on his head and no pants. And you're like, wait, what? I thought I knew this story, but I don't know this story. This story that didn't have the ending that I had a, attached to it when I first saw the beginning of the story. You know what I mean? So I have a weird little story that happened to me, and it was weird right out of the gate,

but then it got kind of otter, and here it is. I was driving out from my house the other day to go get some lunch. And in leaving my house, I have to take one particular road that goes right down a canyon. It's a super busy road. It's one of the only roads that joins like the valley side of Los Angeles to the other side of Los Angeles. So it's like a main artery. There's no sidewalks on it. It's precarious just for a car to drive on it.

It's through the hills. It winds and it weaves. It's like riding the back of a snake. So rarely do you ever see a human being walking on foot or riding a bike or skipping or cartwheels? wheeling. It's just a very odd day when you see an actual human being walking on on the edge of this road because there's, like I said, there's no sidewalk. You would literally have to run on the road with the cars, which is very busy and messes out. Kill the music, Roger. Let me tell this. Here's, here's what happened. I'm driving along and I'm going down this precarious canyon, this

hill, and all of a sudden I see a guy on the side of the road running up the hill, which is odd enough. He's kind of like in a fast jog, and it's kind of a not a fat guy, but a hefty guy, a chubby guy, probably around, I don't know, maybe between 23 and 27, somewhere in there. And from what I could tell, he was Latino, looked all indications where it was a Mexican. guy. I could be off. I didn't do a DNA test, but he looked like a Mexican gentleman. And it was odd enough that he was running up the hill. Like, A, why is he running? And B, why is he on this crazy hill? He could probably get hit by a car. And so I see this. And then he gets closer. I get closer to him. And I see he's like hanging on to a little baby chihuahua. Like a

puppy and he's kind of got it with one hand and he's running with it. It was reminiscent. You ever see these nature shows when a mother bear or a mother lion just grabs their, their cub in their mouth and starts running with it and the poor cubs like just dangling and bouncing up and up and down? That's what this chihuahua looked like. The guy was just kind of haphazardly holding onto it with one hand and he was running up the hill and his mouth was open and he was breathing heavy and you could see the a sweat on his forehead and is in like a light blue t-shirt with sweat stains and so i'm wondering what the hell is going on here what's the story like a why is there a guy running up this hill and

b what's with the baby chihuahua no collar on it nothing and the chihuahua is just looking like it's you know it looks like those babies that are being pulled around by their mother in the wild you know they just kind of get that blank look on their face like uh hey mom what Where the hell are you taking me? I was nice and warm over in the cave over there, and suddenly you bite my neck and carrying me through this tangle of weeds here. I mean, what's the deal here, Honeypot? So I kind of didn't know what to think.

I was like, okay, this guy looked like he was running for his life. It looked like he was running for the law. Who runs up a hill with a baby Chihuahua dangling in their arms? And it was one of those stories where I got the beginning of it. And I wasn't really sure what it was. It really left me scratch in my head. Like, I couldn't even really fill in the blank. Like, why is this guy doing this?

So I go down, I get my food. It's, you know, pick up food. I'm going to take it back up to my house and eat it. So I wasn't at the restaurant very long. I drive back up. And on the way up the hill, there's this one little spot where there's an outdoor like coffee, uh, coffee shop. But the wall of the coffee shop is directly on the road. Like if you were hanging on the wall and you leaned out, you would get hit by a car.

And I'm driving up, and sure enough, on my way back, here's this guy, this guy with the sweaty blue shirt. And he's clinging to the side of the wall like spot. Spider-Man, and he's got the Chihuahua up in one hand. He's hanging onto the wall with one hand, onto a railing, and he's got the Chihuah on the other hand, and he's like waving it back and forth to all these people drinking their coffee. And all I can think is, oh, my God, he's trying to sell it. He's holding it up.

It looked like he was going, hey, Chihuahua for sale, who wants a chihuahua? I'm hanging on the edge of a wall. I'm about to be hit by a car who wants it, baby Chihuahua. And so now my head starts filling in the rest of the story like, okay, and I have no idea what the answer is, but I thought this guy, maybe he was homeless, maybe he grabbed the Chihuahua, stole it, was running as fast as he could up this hill to get away.

the first group of humans he saw which there's about like six or seven like huddled in this little patio drinking their coffee he's like I'm going to unload the chihuahua I'm going to get a payday here so he's clinging to the wall waving this poor little puppy

back and forth and I'm you know so I fill in this story I'm like a kidnapping dog thief sells stolen dog continues to run up hill and get away from the long arm of the law. But I really don't know. I mean, that's what I'm saying.

You ever have one of these mystifying unsolved mystery stories? Well, you think you kind of know, but you don't know. Maybe the guy was, uh, maybe the chihuahua was hurt and he was running up the hill. Can somebody help me with my chihuahua? I ran over his foot with the Lomore blade. Help, help. what's funny is we fill in the blanks and this was one of those ones where i kind of couldn't fill in the blanks but yet at the same time i did and and it was kind of that haunting imagery you

know so you're going why are you telling this story harlan and it's like you know sometimes imagery gets in your head have you ever seen that painting called the scream it's the guy he's standing in the dark and his eyes are all haunted and he's holding the sides of his is his his face and screaming, like when McCauley Calkins screamed when he put the aftershave on and Home Alone. There's a famous painting called The Scream. There's another famous painting. I forget the name of it, but it's a horse running down a train track, and there's a train coming towards it from the distance.

And you just look at it, and it gets ingrained in your head. And you know the horse and the train, it's not going to be a good ending for the horse. So there's certain imagery that gets frozen in your brain and the imagery of this chubby Mexican guy running up half a mountain cuddling a chihuahua and a sweaty blue shirt and gasping for breath just, it's stuck in my head. I don't know if you ever remember that cover of Time magazine.

I think it was back in the 60, but it's a very famous cover. It was out of Vietnam where it just showed a mother and her kid running down a dirt road in Vietnam is black and white picture and the horror etched in their faces and there was blood. The kid was naked and it was like a prize-winning photo. And I guess this vision of this guy running with the Chihuahua looking like he was guilty is just one of those visions in my head. So there it is.

Maybe you've had a moment like that where some bizarre or out of, of context moment happened to you and you're just like what the hell happened here what's going on so there you go something to think about if you want to share your story uh feel free you might you might have one that you're like you know what harland you're right there was that time i saw the guy wrestling an alligator uh at the side of the road in new jersey and uh while he wrestled he was eating a snow cone. I couldn't believe it. So if you have any weird images that you think you want to share,

323-739-43330, 3-2-3-739-433-30, I always like to hear your bizarre stories. And if you can't remember that phone number, just go to my website, harloweems.com, and the phone number is right there at the bottom of the homepage. Love to hear from you nuts. All right, I got to do a little plug here. For those of you that have yet to join the premium content for only $20 a year on the

Harland Highway app on your cell phone, $20 a year, I do a whole other podcast that you guys don't even know about. And if you're not a premium member, you're not hearing it. It is an amazing podcast. People are loving it. It's called Let's Have a Fight podcast. and basically it's three funny celebrities, comedians, actors, whoever. And they have three verbal fights over the course of the podcast,

and it is insane. It is a verbal throwdown. It's abusive. It's raunchy. It's loud. It's exciting. It's intelligent. It's stupid.

It's all those things. And here's a little sampling of our next Let's Have a Fight podcast. It's me and Tom. Green going head to head, and the topic is multiple wives. Should a man or a woman have a multiple amount of wives or husbands? Yes or no. I say yes. Tom says no, but I wanted to give you guys a taste of what, of what Let's Have a Fight

podcast is all about. It's coming up soon, and if you're not a premium member, you don't get to hear it. 20 bucks, get you this. Have a little sample listen of Let's Have a Fight. Number four. Listen, I would, there's nothing wrong with having variety in your life. What's that saying? Variety is the spice of life.

I'm just saying that if you're saying that you don't like the idea of being married to one woman. Yeah, which I don't. And wouldn't multiple women be multiple times the same problem? No, but my argument. More wives, more problems. My argument is to you. I got 99 problems, but ain't one. Tom, it's like this.

Let's say you had 10 cars in your garages, and if one car broke down, you would go in the other car and go for a nice long drive. So if you have 10 wives and one of them's giving the old business, they're giving you the jazz, you go into Margaret's room and say, see you later, Carol, I'll be in here with Margaret. Okay, so we're in the state of California. They've got community property laws here. You get married once, you get a divorce, you takes half your money. Right. You get married to 10 ladies at once. It doesn't work out with one, takes half.

The other one takes another half. The other one takes a... You're left with nothing. You can have nothing but imagine the grin on your face, dude. I don't know. I mean, think of all the sexual intercourse, Tom Green. Seems like it would just be more wives, more problems. That's what it comes down to.

Do people get married to go to the movies and open Christmas presents? Or do they just want some nice sexual intercourse? Okay? You got 10, 10 sexual intercourse is in there. Huh? Unbelievable. Yeah, I, uh, yeah, I, yeah, I, uh, see why I left Tom Green speechless, okay, uh, yeah, see, see who won that fight. And there's two more. Uh, we have another fight about, uh, assisted suicide is another one. And another one, another fight is about should people pick up their dog poo or not. It gets heated. It gets crazy. It gets rude. It gets fun. We have a blast Tom Green for, from MTV and all his movies, road trip and all that.

So check it out. Please join our premium account, $20 a year, and there's going to be more and more fights coming all through the whole year. Very entertaining, very fun, and controversial, and silly, and I hope you guys get on the bandwagon and join the Harland Highway Premium account. Hey, everybody, who wants to have better sex? No? Yes, yes.

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Hello. Hello. Hey, Harland. What's going on? I got a question for you, buddy. Been listening to the podcast for some time and I was just wondering, do you have any pets? you know, cat or a dog or a lizard, chameleon, I guess that's a lizard. You know, do you got pets? What about your pets? Anyway, this is Mike calling from Utah, and I'm looking forward to your show in Salt Lake City next fall to ways off, but I'm looking forward to it.

So thanks for the comedy, buddy. Chicken Jamain. Well, hey, Mike, glad you're coming. to the show in Utah later in the year. And thanks for the call. Pets, you know, that's kind of an appropriate question considering, you know, I was talking earlier about the dog napper guy. And ironically, I did have a chihuahua.

I probably talked about them on the show before. I don't have pets at the moment because I'm so busy. I'm flying all over the place. But I'll give you a little rundown of my pets. I had a little black chihuahua. Chihuahua. His name was Fisherman Bob with the best dog in the world. Little black guy. Wasn't one of those angry, trembly chihuahuas.

He was a really well-tempered, well-mannered. People loved the hell out of fisherman Bob. Sadly, one night when Bob was out running around on my front lawn, I believe an owl flew down and took him away. And sometimes people laugh when they hear that, but it's true. I think he was snatched by an owl. because he was so small, an owl swooped down and picked him up and had him for a midnight snack, which still, I tell you, man, even talking about it, my heart breaks.

It's like, I don't know if you've ever had a kid abducted, but it feels like it, man, because, you know, when you have a dog, you're on watch. You're responsible for that dog. And every night I would let my dogs out to run around and play in the yard, and I'd leave the door open and watch TV, and they'd run in and out, and then one night my big dog came running in, and the little chihuahua didn't. And I went outside, and I could hear the owl hoeing,

and my big dog was freaking out every time the owl was whewing, and there was a little bit of blood, and I was like, oh, God. I don't even like to think about it. So at a little chihuahua named Fisherman Bob, I had a bigger dog called a Gindo. It's a Korean breed. It looks like an albino coyote, and her name was Captain Chili Dog.

beautiful dog. She lived out her life. I think she lived about 15, 16 years. Beautiful dog. And then to replace fisherman Bob, I bought one of those big fat British bulldogs and named her Sailor Pudge or Sailor. And I figured she's so heavy. Not even a Teradacto could lift that one off the ground. It's like a Chris Farley dog, right? So those were my dogs that I had while I was living in Los Angeles. And then it's funny you mentioned lizards because I did have a whole bunch of lizards. Half of them I bought at the pet store. And the other half I would just go out in my garden and catch with a net.

I have one of these nets that you, you know, the nets you skim your pool with? I'd go out in my yard because I live in California. There's lizards all over my yard. There's different kinds. There's skinks, which are really long and look like snakes with legs. I caught a few skinks. And then these other lizards that look more like horny-toed lizards. And I'd catch them, and I had a terrarium set up in my living room,

a big glass terrarium, and I'd throw them all in there together. And I'd also go out in the yard and get snails and bugs and worms and spiders. And I'd just put everything in this terrarium together, and I kind of created my own little universe. I would pretend I was God. And as stupid as it sounds, boy, It was fascinating. I don't know if you've ever sat and watched a fish tank and watched the fish swim around,

but when you put a bunch of insects and creepy crawly things in a glass terrarium, it's mesmerizing. You'll see things on insects that you didn't know about. You'll see parts that move and features and you just, you know, because who takes the time to lay out on the ground and observe an insect, right? But when you put a bunch of them in a terrarium, you can watch them, and they're fascinating. You go, my God, look at these complex, intricate creations with all their moving legs and antennae and parts and outer shells and, you know, beetles and potato bugs and inchworms and spiders making webs. It was fascinating. So I had that.

I even caught a tarantula. I threw that in there. I caught a scorpion. I threw a couple of those in there. It was wild. And then those ones, that kind of lived its life. I'd keep the lizards for about a month, and then I'd let them go back out in the garden again.

I just wanted to watch them. And then I guess one day I caught a pocket gopher, which I've talked about on the podcast before. It's a small little gopher about the size of like a, you know like a halfway between a mouse and a pet shop rat and they're the ones that make the little round holes in people's lawns and chew the hell out of their lawns and they got great big teeth like beavers and they got giant claws for digging to the ugliest little things

and this guy fell in my pool and was drowning and I was sort of happy about it because they're like these are the asswads that rip up my lawn and destroy all my beautiful grass, but because I love animals, I couldn't do it. So like the hand to God, I reached down into the pool, and I pulled this little pocket gopher up as it was taking its last breath. I could see the bubble rising up to the surface, and I got him and dried him off and saved him.

And he turned out to be a great little pet. I didn't think I'd really like him. I just wanted to save him, but then I had him in the terrarium with a bunch of dirt. And I could watch him tunnel, and he actually became responsive to me talking to him, and he'd let me reach in and pet him. This was a wild gopher. I had a wild gopher in my living room. And you know, those little baby carrots you buy?

I'd give them baby carrots and celery, and he'd grab them and chew them. He had a good little life. I actually really adored the little guy. I got quite attached to my little gopher. And then one weekend I had to go away and I left him in the hands of a friend and my friend didn't put the lid on the terrarium properly and the damn thing got out and ran away. So at least I saved him and I had him as a pet for about, I guess about half a year and he grew, grew to full size and he was fed well and loved and taken care of. So wherever you are, pocket gopher with your buck teeth and your big claws, I hope you're doing good. maybe you have a little gopher family now you probably do because my lawn is destroyed

I'm not kidding there's probably about 70 holes in my in my yard uh thanks to the pocket gopers that live there but but I gained a new love and respect for them when I actually had to save one and take care of it so so that's kind of my list of pets since I've lived in California I wish I had one now I'd and I've been thinking about getting more dogs. I really like the idea of possibly getting a couple of pugs because they're so ugly that they're cute and they make me laugh. I like looking at a dog's face and it makes me smile and laugh.

My British Bulldogs, Sailor Pudge, just cracked me up because, you know, just a big fat, roly-poly. It reminded me of Winnie the Pooh, an ugly version of Winnie the Pooh and just made me laugh. so there you go thanks for the call and uh you know if anyone wants to call in and share what their pets are i'd be happy to hear that too uh 323 739 40 330 it's pet talk here on the harland highway podcast crab apples the harland highway crazy news story that's weird wow that's strange stuff Okay, here it is.

Here's our crazy news story of the day. This is almost a great news story, but it's still crazy. Here's the headline, nude woman attacks Waffle House customers. Are you kidding me? Look, good Lord, and a side of grits and gravy. It's kind of hard to believe. In fact, if it weren't for that official police report, we may not have believed it ourselves. I want to show you this woman.

Jennifer Nicholson of Marietta is accused of punching a woman in the face and breaking her nose. The warrant says she threw multiple platters at people that were dining inside a waffle house on George Busby Parkway. And according to the warrant, Nicholson was not wearing any clothing during the tirade. She was immediately taken to jail in Cobb County. Wow, cray cray, right? I mean, what the hell's that all about? Let's get into this story. Here it is.

Please say a Georgia woman who was first. walking around a waffle house preaching to customers, allegedly punched a woman, took off her clothes, and attacked those in the restaurant. Wow. So you get up in the morning, you go for a waffle, a delicious waffle. Not only do you get a sermon,

but you get a strip show. It's like, man, pass me some more syrup, man. The peel is coming out. Oh, man. Someone give me some more butter for my flapjack. Witnesses say, as you heard, Jennifer Nicholson arrived at the Waffle House in Kensaw, Georgia, with a man on January 8th. He left her leaving her in the restaurant. Maybe he knew what was coming.

According to a police report, a witness said, Nicholson began to walk around the restaurant preaching to customers. What do you preach in a Waffle House? Oh, hell, Lord, the Lord came down on the street. seventh day. And the Lord said, thou shalt have a nice fluffy buttermilk waffle. The Lord said, that's what the Lord said, you put extra butter, you put maple syrup on your extra fluffy buttermilk waffle, or you will burn in hell. You sinners were burning hell who hath the pancakes. The Lord said, thou must have a buttermilk waffle. Oh, hello.

Uh, the witnesses said, uh, Nicholson followed her outside and back into the restaurant. When the woman told Nicholson to leave her alone, she said, Nicholson punched her in the nose. Then in the chest and twice on her arm. Nicholson then allegedly threw a plate at the woman, missing her and striking a window. Wow. The Lord said, thou shalt have a buttermilk waffle and get the fuck away from me. I'm going to punch your motherfucking ass in. Come here, bitch.

That's right. You get two shots in the chest, one in the head, three in the arm. You stay away. Can't you see I'm preaching over here? Can't you see I'm naked? Can you see I'm butt naked? I'm preaching about the Lord's message for the fluffy buttermilk waffle, child. Another witness told police that Nicholson stopped him

When he tried to leave the restaurant by wrapping her arms around him Like a bear hug The man said he pushed Nicholson away so he could leave I don't know if I believe that part I mean guys you're out for a you know you're at a crummy restaurant You know it's four dollars for a whole meal And a naked chick wraps herself around you you're gonna be what guy pushes a naked chick off of them uh hey man i just came in here for a waffle

but you know if somebody wants to like have sexual intercourse i guess i'm down i didn't i didn't order it you're not going to charge me for this right is this on the house because i i did not ask for this but if if you know if someone wants me to it's unclear when nicholson took off or closed but when police arrived, they said they saw a naked woman on her knees blocking a man inside his booth. Uh-huh. Blocking a man inside his, on his knees, on her knees? It's not called blocking. Okay, you got the last, the I-N-G part, the K-I-N-G put an S-U-C in front of that.

Yeah, they say they saw a naked woman sucking a man inside. his booth. I don't think a naked woman gets on her knees to do blocking. A woman, a naked woman puts on football uniforms to do blocking. Usually when a woman's naked kneeling in a booth, it ain't blocking, it's sucking. Oh, hallelujah. Hallelujah, the Lord said I should have a sausage. The Lord bequeathed, I should have a sausage with my fluffy bottom of milk.

pancake, waffle, whatever the fuck it is. I shall kneel down in the Lord's name I shall get on my knees and I shall do some blocking I shall do some cock blocking I shall do some sucking on my sausage here at the Waffle House

in the Lord's name Hall of look can I get an amen can I get two men can I get three or four men I'll have a whole bunch of sausage God, this is getting ridiculous. According to the Atlanta Journal, the accused stripped off all her clothes

in front of the Waffle House staff and patrons during a suspected, excited delirium state. Wow! Have any of you ever been in an excited delirium state? You know, I'm so excited and delirious. I think I'll go to a fucking Waffle House and take my clothes off. and kneel down and hug men and get naked and I'm so excited and delirious.

Doesn't that happen when you see the Beatles? Doesn't that happen when women see Bon Jovi or Brad Pitt? Excited delirium happens in those moments. I don't think, you know, picture the women screaming for the Beatles and Brad Pitt and Elvis. Now, transplant them to a bunch of women screaming, watching some pimply face guy, grilling waffles at the waffle house. It just don't jive, man. Here we go.

Nicholson then allegedly threw plates at police while screaming incoherently. Oh my God. The Lord, you get back. I'm doing the Lord's work. I'm doing the Lord's work. Like a ninja. She's throwing waffle house plates. Then the police jumped into action.

and they used a taser on her. But when the probe came loose, she allegedly lunged at the other officer. During a struggle, she scratched an officer on his chin, drawing blood. I shall draw the blood of the oppressor. The Lord has commissioned me. The Lord has summoned me to do the work of the buttermilk waffle.

I shall throw the Lord's plates I shall eat the buttermilk waffle I shall suck the buttermilk sausage Oh god Lord A buttermilk sausage What the hell Now here's the end of the story Nicholson was arrested and charged

With aggravated battery Simple battery against a police officer Simple assault Simple battery I'm almost saying Buttery. Simple buttery, because she's at the Waffle House, public indecency, and decent exposure, second-degree criminal damage to property, and obstruction of officers. According to the newspaper, she's being held in the Cobb County Jail. I don't know. I would change that charge to, you know, erotic strip show at lame-ass waffle restaurant where nothing good

ever happens, something good finally happened. We got to see a strip show eating our breakfast. That would be my charge. So there you go. There's your, I hope your waffles can be so exciting. By the way, I do love Waffle House. I actually have a coffee mug. I bought a, whenever I go down to the South, I go to Waffle House. I love it. It's just a small, little tiny place with a counter. And all they sell is like waffles and eggs. and bacon and toast. It's great. And I think the next time I go in, I'm going to strip.

I'm going to wrap my arms around somebody. I'm going to kneel down. No, I'm not. I'm not. I'm just going to order the bacon and egg breakfast and be on my merry way. So there you go. So I don't think you get any more exciting than that.

Let's end the show right there with the Waffle House extravaganza. Unbelievable. Oh, delish. But before we do go, let's do a few announcements. As I mentioned last podcast, I got to tell you about this. There's an incredible stand-up comedy event happening. It's called The Comedy Party. That's right, the Comedy Party.

It's happening April 7, 8, and 9 in Iowa and Illinois or Indiana, one of the two. I forget. I just made the announcement. so my head's a little foggy, but it's called The Comedy Party, and it's four comedians. It's me, Tom Green, Polly Shore, and Bobby Lee from Mad TV. What a night of stand-up comedy at beautiful theaters. One night only in three different cities.

I don't have them on the tip of my tongue, so please go to Harlan Williams.com. Check my stand-up comedy link and see if you are in the vicinity. I'm telling you, man. come out for this show, The Comedy Party, Polly Shore, Harland Williams, Tom Green, Bobby Lee. It's just going to be a night of madness at gorgeous theaters. We're just going to have a ball. So I hope you get on that.

Also, while you're at my stand-up comedy site, check out this month, February. Coming up, February 3rd to the 6th, I'll be in Tampa, Florida. Maybe I'll see a Waffle House. I'll be at the improv doing my shows, Tampa Improv, February 3rd through the 6th, and then the following weekend, you can catch me February 11th through the 14th at the Orlando Improv. So a couple of improv dates down in Florida, and then later in the month, I will be in Scottsdale, Arizona. Beautiful club called the House of Comedy, February 25th to the 28th. Great venue, brand new club.

Awesome place. And then going over into March, March 10th to the 13th. Yours truly will be in Houston, Texas, at the improv down there. So a lot of great gigs kicking off the new year, 2016 here. While you're on my website, please check out our store. We have a great store full of all kinds of fun gifts, t-shirts, books, music, digital downloads, comedy, movies, all kinds of wild stuff. Artwork, all kinds of cool stuff in the Harlan Williams.com merch store.

We'll ship it out to you. And please don't forget, as you heard earlier with Tom Green, please subscribe, join the premium content. All you do is you go to your app store, type in the Harland Highway podcast. You will now have my podcast on your phone. Listen to it anywhere, any time. You can pause it. You can fast forward it. You can reverse it.

And you get the 50 most current episodes of the Harland Highway. If you join our premium package, you get all 750 backlogged episodes of the Harland Highway. And also you get, that includes special content of me doing stand-up, special interviews. And also my other podcast that I do called Let's Have a podcast. a fight, which is really fun. You heard a sample clip earlier. And here's the best part, gang. 20 bucks for a whole year.

20 bucks for a whole year of all that special content. And the money goes to help support all the podcasting that I do. And I do appreciate all your support. So thank you so much, you guys. Check it out. Hope you join. I think that's all we got for now. I hope you had fun today.

enjoy your waffles, and until next time, chicken, chowmaine, baby. What's going on? I got a question for you, buddy.