The Harland Highway - 789 - CINNAMON BOY. A haunted cell phone. Question of the day.

Episode Date: August 4, 2016

Cinnamon Boy visits the studio today. A haunted cell phone ghost story. The question of the day about elephants. Ninja Turtle knowledge. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, how are you, la la, ladies and gentlemen, this is Harlan Williams. You're on the Harland Highway podcast. Oh, yes, you are. What a show we have today. We have a very frightening ghost story, a very strange supernatural ghost story that might hit closer to home than you might think. This is something that might apply or might happen to you. I hope not. Got my hair. standing up on end. And speaking of scary, good Lord, cinnamon boy dropped by the studio today. I haven't heard from that moron for a long time. So we got cinnamon boy coming. Also, the Harland Highway Question of the Day involving some very large packaderms, I think is what they're called. I don't even know what a pacaderm is, but somehow it popped into my head that that was the right word.

Also, we'll be taking some of your phone calls, and we're going to talk a little bit about summer. The dying days or the approaching end of summer, which I feel so bad saying, but, man, its time is slipping away fast. We've got to talk about summer and teenage mutant ninja turtles and all kinds of stuff. So let's go, let's do it. This is the Harland Highway. Where am I? What is this? Some kind of a joke or something?

Welcome to the Harland Highway. What you're talking about Williams? Son, you got a panty on your head. Shut up and sit down, you big ball fuck. Oh, God, what's happening here? What's happening? Hey, Harland, it's chilly. You just made a wrong turn.

On to the Harland Highway. We choose to go to the moon in this decade and do the other thing. Not because they are easy, but because they are hard. That is fantastic. That's wrong with everybody in this crazy place. The Harland Highway. What is it? The opening.

To what? To another dimension. This is Harland Williams. You're a bad man. You're a very bad man. That is fantastic. The Harland Highway, question of the day. Okay, it's simple, it's easy.

It can sometimes be hurtful, but this is today's question of the day. Oh, I'm so hurt. I'm so hurt inside. If elephants never forget, okay? You've heard that saying elephants never forget, right? If, excuse me, I'm just, I'm wiping away a tear. If elephants never forget, why is it that over all these years of my life, I've never once received a birthday.

card or a Christmas card from an elephant. You fat bastards! Do you know how much that hurts inside, you fat bastards? Lumbering around in the bushes, eating twigs and leaves and trumpeting into the night and stomping around and stampeding? You never forget that stuff. But where were you on November 14th when I went to my mailbox? and there was no happy birthday, Harland, from the elephants.

What about Christmas Eve? Trying to be cheery at the Christmas party and put on a good face. But inside, I'm dying, I'm hurting because I got no Christmas card. There was no, have a holly jolly Christmas from the elephants. Why? Because you forgot me, you fat fox. You big gray, wrinkly, fat fox, and it hurts me to say that, but enough is enough. How many more years do I have to go through this? Not getting a birthday card.

Are a Christmas card from you fat fucking assholes. It just hurts. It hurts. Please remember me, elephants. Please. Please. And that's the Harland Highway question of the day. Ha ha ha ha.

The Harland Highway question of the day. Okay. I got to share this story with you. This freaked me out. Okay? This freaked me the F out. And if you don't know what F means, go look at an alphabet.

Because F is right in the middle. I don't know what that meant Okay, so we've all heard ghost stories And we all have modern technology We all have our cell phones Many of us have our iPhones Well, this is a story that creeped my ass out This is a real story

And it's kind of a ghost story that involves an iPhone So put your sweaters on kids And gather around the campfire here it comes All right, Charles. All right, enough. Let me get to it. So a buddy of mine just recently, sadly, had his father-in-law pass away, like just last week. Okay?

I'm not going to name said friend out of respect for the family and whatnot. Not that you'd know who he was, but nonetheless, let's show a little respect here. RIP to the gentleman that passed away, it's never easy losing a loved one. But nonetheless, something very kind of scary happened, and it kind of sent shivers up my spine when he told me. Here's what happened. And so the father-in-law passed away last week, and, you know, they went through the procedure of, you know, taking them to the thing and the funeral parlor and all this and that. And then about four days after it happened, maybe five, I can't remember the exact number of days, but very, very soon after the event happened. and maybe he wasn't even in the ground yet.

So this happened within four or five days of the gentleman passing. My buddy was at work or at some kind of function where he couldn't answer his phone right away, but as he reports it, his cell phone rang, his iPhone rang with a FaceTime call, okay? his cell phone rang with a FaceTime call on it and the call was coming from the dead father-in-law's cell phone

now you're saying okay so somebody picked it up blah blah blah here's where my hair stood up he said he went to his wife he went to his mother-in-law and he said oh did one of you guys dial me on so-and-so's phone by accident or were you trying to reach me on his phone and they said no none of us have used his phone in fact his phone is at home so sure enough they went and checked and the father-in-law's phone not only was it at home it was

packed away in a bag and the phone call was placed. The face-time call to my friend was made during a time when no one was at the house. No one was in the home.

The phone was packed away in a bag and it facetimed him. Somebody called him. And it wasn't a butt dial because nobody he had the phone the phone was in a locked empty house in a bag how freaking creepy is that and

this is a real story this isn't the type of guy that would just make this crap up like he's not that kind of guy i mean can you imagine you imagine if that was you and god forbid someone close to you and your family died? And three days later, two days later, whatever, you get a FaceTime call? And what was interesting, he said he tried to answer the phone. He was in a meeting or is at work doing something. And it was one of those situations like just when he got to it,

the last ring happened. And so he just missed it. He said he was just about to press the button and it stopped. He said it rang like a whole bunch of times, but he couldn't, like, break away from what he was doing. I mean, this just wasn't a phone call. This just wasn't an audio call. It was like, hello, it's me.

I'm dead. Hello, it's cold in here. Can somebody bring me something? Could I get a blanket or a hot coffee or something? I mean, this was a FaceTime call, people. I mean, I don't know if ghosts or zombies or dead people coming back from the dead just, you know, aren't happy with the traditional, like, rattling of the chain or squeaking floorboard anymore. Now they've got to make it real personal. It's like,

you know what, man, I'm dead, okay? And I want people to see that I'm dead. And I want to, I want some face time with the living, man. No more this hiding in a closet and rattling some clothes around. No more squeaky floor. No more slamming a door. Fuck that shit. God damn it, I'm gonna, I want, I want to see the living. I want the living to see me. I'm gonna, Patrick Swayzey somebody's ass. I'm a fucking ghost, damn it.

Somebody fucking talk to me, look at me. You look me in the eye when you talk to my dead ass. Motherfuckers always just, you know, returning your heads around and they never see us. There's nothing there. Bullshit. Oh, hell no. Motherfuckers, you're going to look in my dead eyes.

I'll tell you what. Oh, hell yeah. I mean, can you imagine if he did get to that phone call and he pressed the button on the FaceTime? And I would wonder about that for the rest of my life. What if my freaking father-in-law's face was there and he was talking? but he wasn't necessarily talking the way you're used to sing him maybe he did i hate to be morbid but you know we're in the middle of a ghost story here what if he did like appear to look dead and had kind of a slurred voice and he was it was kind of like no help me i'm cold help

me. Where are you? Come and help me. I'm scared. Right? If it was like a creepy boy and his timing was off and his eyes were like kind of milky and kind of dead. The irises were cloudy and his skin was pale and maybe in the middle of help me a cockroach crawls out of his mouth and oh my god but dudes i mean forget all the the drama i'm putting on it that you know and i said to my friend i said okay wait a minute did you go and look at your history you know how when you you can go into your iPhone okay you can go into your iPhone i'm going into it right now and you can see a little button it says recents. Okay, that means your recent calls.

And if you press recent, it gives you a list of all the recent calls with the names and numbers. And he said, yes, I pressed recent, and there was his name and his number, and it was, it says FaceTime or it just says a regular call. But recents tells you what kind of call it was, and it said Face it, he said he checked, and it was there. And after the fact, they went and tracked down his phone. And it was in the empty house in a bag stored somewhere. Whoa. So there you go, man. That's like a modern.

I don't know if that's the first iPhone ghost story ever told. But, man, like I was kind of freaking out when he told me. And he was just a little bit dumbfounded. He was kind of like mystified and in shock a little bit. He was like, you could tell, he couldn't explain it. He didn't know what to think. So I want to know if any of you guys have any, you know, technology ghost stories. If any of you had any occult occurrences with your cell phones, with your computers, with your Skype, with your, with your FaceTime, with your I chat, with your, have any of you had anyone reach out from the great?

and try to reach you or contact you through your modern technological devices. This is the first time I've ever heard of it. Like, man, am I glad that gloomy, glowing ghost is gone? Do you hear that, Scoob? Like, I wonder what it is. I want to hear from you if you have a real story. Don't make up something stupid or just, if you have something real. Lay it on us, man.

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Don't throw your back out. An I-GoStory at 323-739-433. Zoix. Like I guess we're not alone after all. So anyways, there you go, a very eerie topic. Hold on. Roger, what's that music? What the hell is that music? Where's that coming from? What?

Hi, I'm cinnamon boy, and I love cinnamon! Cinnamon. Oh, God. What is he, what are you doing here, cinnamon boy? I'm cinnamon boy, and I love cinnamon. We know, I know who you are and I know what you love, but that doesn't answer my question. I'll ask it again. Since you don't seem to have much in your brain except cinnamon, what are you doing in my podcast studio? Oh, well, let me answer you much more clearly and much more thoroughly. Well, thank you. That's what I'm asking you. May I proceed, please? Yes, you may proceed. I'm cinnamon boy, and I love cinnamon. Stop it.

There has to be more going on inside your head than your cinnamon boy. I don't need you coming in here and interrupting me. You know, I work really hard to put this show together. I need to focus, I need to concentrate, and I need cinnamon! You need cinnamon! And I'm the one to give it to you! Because I'm cinnamon, boy, and I love cinnamon! Stop it! Please!

You know what, I gotta ask you to leave. I don't want to hear... I know all you're going to do is talk about cinnamon... Cinnamon... Can't you say it? Yes, I can say it. Well, it surely doesn't sound like you. you can say it. Say what?

You know what I'm about to say? Okay, don't say it. Cinnamon! That's what I wanted to say. And that's what you tried to say. Cinnamon! But I get it right every time! Because I'm cinnamon boy! And I love cinnamon! Get out of here, you fucking idiot! Surely, surely, you shouldn't yell like that. Me? Me not yell?

You've been yelling since a second you got in here. Because I'm cinnamon boy. I know and you love cinnamon. I'd rather if you let me say that part please. Oh really? Why's that? Because I'm cinnamon boy and I love cinnamon. Get out. Get the hell out of here immediately. Can I say one thing before I leave? Shirley Shirley. Gee, I wonder what the hell you're going to say? Well, it's almost as if you think you know what cinnamon boy's going to say. Hmm, let me see. Can I put some money on it? If you'd like. Okay, I think you're going to say I'm cinnamon boy and I love cinnamon. Well, you're wrong. Looks like you owe me some money. Oh, I'm wrong. What were you going to say? I'm boy cinnamon and cinnamon I'm boy.

So you mixed it up, huh, kid? Surely, surely I did. All right, I'm going to stay calm. Get the hell out of my studio, you idiot freak. No need to be rude, you mustn't. What are you talking backwards for? What are you now, Yoda? No.

How could I be Yoda? What, I'm cinnamon boy, and I love cinnamon. Get the fuck out of here. Roger, get him out. Now, goodbye. Holy shh. What the hell is? I'm having a nice show, we're having some good conversation, and that idiot walks in.

Ay, aye, aye, aye. You know, there's days when I do this podcast, and I just, I scratch my head, and I wonder, why you don't have cinnamon? I don't, because I'm cinnamon boy, and I love cinnamon. Get out Lock the door Roger Go to a commercial I need to decompress Holy Christ

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recommend with summer's eve freshness has never been simpler hello hey orland it's from Dallas um listen man this has been driving me crazy for a long time but in the original teenage mutant ninja turtles movie I mean the foot clan was like they were all these super skilled ninjas right But at the time, before the turtles came along, they were only stealing things from people. They had no need to be ninjas, other than to be sneaky, of course. So, I mean, they're just glorified thieves. I'm overqualified, I would say.

So just want to get your opinion on that. I thought I might be missing something. So let me know. Mugoo pork, baby. Holy crap. Ethan from Dallas, you might. you might have finally stumped me somebody might have finally stumped the whiz kid um i just do not know a damn thing about the ninja turtles i've never watched it

i've never seen a movie i've never watched the cartoon i've never read the comic book i think there was something about it that turned me off when it first came out now i can't tell you if it's a good show a bad show at the character Characters are fun, if it's a good concept. I think initially I was turned off when it first hit the scene way back. I think it was in the 90s or the 80s. And when I heard teenage mutant ninja turtles, something about that rubbed me the wrong way

because I thought there was too many titles, too many words in the title. It was a collection of teenagers. they were mutants, they were ninjas, and they were turtles. And something about it bothered me. I just thought, oh, somebody just grabbed, like, all these things and squished them together. And, oh, yeah, as if a turtle could be a ninja. And, you know, they're just trying to make it weird.

And it's all, like, it's all phony and pretentious. Whatever, I'm not getting into that. So I don't know. Have you ever had one of those things where something could be great? And for whatever reason, just the title or the artwork or the sound of it or the look of it, it makes you prejudiced against that project. And so this is where I landed with the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. And maybe I screwed up.

Maybe they're amazing. You know, obviously they resonate with somebody because they're a huge, like, multi-trillion dollar franchise. I mean, global franchise where they've just, like, made monster money, man. And billions of people have seen them and watched them and absorbed them. And here's me sitting here going, oh, that's so pretentious because I see what you did. You mixed four different genres together like mutants and turtles and ninjas and teenagers. Yeah, well, screw you.

I'm never going to participate. So, dude, I feel bad. This could be a first where I have no opinion, no answer, nothing. I have nothing for you on the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. I apologize. I usually like to be informed. I usually like to think I have something for my wonderful listeners. And here I am with nothing.

I bring you nothing, sir. You come to me with everything, and in return, I go. grant you nothing, sir, nothing. You walked in here with so many hopes and so many dreams, so many aspirations. You hoped to gain knowledge and wisdom, and instead you turn around slowly, bow your head, and walk away, empty-handed, with absolutely, Nothing. Well, I blame me, dude.

Excellent question. I don't know if someone else can help you, but damn it, I got nothing. I'm a full-grown, loser, nothing human. There, that's kind of my spin on Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle. Full-grown, nothing human, stupid. whatever I said. You win this round. Yikes. Um, Scoob? Like, where'd everybody go? Like, I have a better question. Like, where'd summer go? Yeah. Can you believe, like, we're coming into, uh, we're coming,

we're past the halfway mark of summer? We're coming into the bend around the track to the finish line of summer? What the hell, man? Now, I don't want to dampen it because there's still like four weeks to go. Like August, we're right at the beginning of August here. So let's not jump the fence on the summer. But, man, it just goes so freaking fast, boys and girls. And I'm like, I don't want it to end. Who wants summer to end, man?

I don't know about you guys, but I don't know if you have any cool plans. for your summer. I hope to get fishing still. I hope to do that. I'm hoping to go up to Burning Man again. Last year I told you guys I went out to Burning Man for the first time of my life. It's like a crazy desert festival

where you kind of turn into Mad Max and wander around in your dreams. So I'm going to head out to Burning Man and hopefully get some fishing lines in the water and a few more barbecues. And, you know, just trying to enjoy the lazy days of summer, right? Just that feeling, that the way the days are nice and long

and hazy and warm. And even at night they're warm and the crickets are chirping. And there's just something about, summer man so i i hope you guys listening have some some good summer plans i hope you still have some some fabulous stuff ahead of you um and i know a lot of you have been asking about barbecue eddie uh you know we can't have a summer go by without barbecue eddie so don't worry i'm trying to locate them i'm trying to get him on the phone i'm trying to see how his summer barbecue season is going i hope to

have them coming up real soon. A lot of people have been asking about barbecue Eddie. Hey, Honorable, this is Zach? So, I'm a little behind on the podcast right now. I just listen to the 4th of July episode

about your barbecue. And Barbecue Eddie didn't make an appearance at all. I was just making sure he's okay, making sure he's around because I thought of all people that Barbecue Eddie would have showed up for your barbecue um anyways maybe you can just touch base on where he's at what he's doing

until next time chicken chalmayne baby i hear you zach i hear you i've had other people call in we've got a whole bunch of messages where the hell is barbecue eddy i'm i'm going to work vigorously this week to try and track that little monkey down maybe he found a barbecue maybe if you don't know who barbecuetti is he's a guy that that every summer he phones around the country looking for people to just simply have a barbecue with and i feel bad that we haven't heard from him but i'm i'm thinking maybe he has some peace maybe he's he's come to arrest maybe he's at a place where he no longer has to search for a barbecue maybe he's found one but i promise you you have my word i am on the hunt i'm trying to track him down and as soon as we

we find or get word of barbecue eddie i will make sure he's on this damn podcast where he belongs i almost hope he doesn't find a barbecue because we want to hear from him man so there you go i'll leave you with that little teaser right there as we as we end the show here um thank you for being here everybody i don't forget call in if you have any um technology ghost stories you can share any weird uh super natsy natural occurrences that have happened between you and your technology. We'd love to hear about them here at the Harland Highway. The phone number 323-739-43330.

3-2-3-739-433. Also, if you need that number, you can go to Harlandw Williams.com. The phone number is there. Also, you can write to me. There's a contact link. And while you're there, check out our store. Oh, my God. We've got so many fun items for sale.

in our web store, we will ship the merchandise to you. Also, please, while you're there, check out my stand-up comedy tour schedule. The new dates are up, the new cities, the new towns. I might be coming to your city or town. First up in September is Salt Lake City, Utah. Then I'm heading to Kansas City. Oh, my God.

So check out my site so you can pre-order your tickets to my shows. Also, please, if you're not a premium member yet, become a premium member to the Harland Highway, here's what you do. Just go to my website and click on the app link, and you can go in and you can download the Harland Highway app for your cell phone.

And then once you're there, for $20 a year, not a month, a year, you can become a premium member and get all kinds of special content stuff you will not hear on the regular Harland Highway. So very excited for you guys to join up

and participate as premium members. Everyone seems to really be enjoying it. So thank you, my premium members. And thanks to you guys for being here. Tell your friends about the Harland Highway. And I hope you're having a great summer.

Make some fun plans to round it out if you can. Hopefully we find Barbecue Eddie coming up here real soon. And until next time, baby, chicken. Chalemaine, baby. Hi, I'm Cinnamon Boy, and I love cinnamon. Oh, God. Science, what's that?

Come on, buddy. Let's get out of here.