The Harland Highway - 833 - RUSSIAN KGB agent talks about HACKING. Princess Leah is dead.

Episode Date: January 9, 2017

A Russian spy calls to discuss hacking the USA. Harland's memories of Princess Leah. Abuse at a lemonade stand. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey, hey, hey, chain, change, change the channel if I keep singing. Um, three, four, welcome everybody to the Harland Highway podcast. I am he, your host, Harland Williams. Ooh, that was pretty cool. I am he your host, Harland Williams. That's like a limerick or a rhyme or something, a rap even. Welcome to the show. Great show today.

We're going to be talking about the death of a very famous person. that probably impacted all of our lives, touched our lives, entertained us. A very sad passing. We will commemorate. And I'll share some inside kind of info on it because I actually spent a little time with this very famous person in their home. We'll talk about that. Also, the spying, the Russian spying thing, the hacking. It's just getting too much.

It's all over the news. So we're going right to the source. We're talking to an ex-KGB agent. We're calling into, he's calling us from Russia today, and we, it's going to be fascinating. I want to put an end to all this stuff. It's driving me nuts. I can't hear any more. So we're going to hear right from the horse's mouth of all this hacking and espionage stuff is real.

Also, I'm going to tell you about my experience with some kids who gave me the business at a lemonade stand. Holy smokes, but I'll give you the business right now. This is the Harlan. Highway. Sit down, strap in, and tighten your diaper. Come here, baby. You're about to go down the Harlan Highway. No!

I didn't bargain for this. Oh, yes, you did. Chick-chic-chac-cha. Chick-chic-ch-ch-ch-chall. Oh, maine, baby. And the creature from all the space. Please don't stop. I got to feed an ugly face.

This is the Harland Highway. I hate you. Well, that's the way it goes. What do you say? We get down to business. Yeah, come on now. Here we go, here we go, here we go. So, have we heard enough about the Russian hacking?

Are we done with this Russian hacking business? The Russians tried to sway the election. The Russians tried to put it in Donald Trump's favor. The Russians did this. You know, and, you know, if you're watching the news, you just kind of roll your eyes and go, why did this become a big point of contention after the election results? after all the votes were tallied, after everything came in.

And then you see footage of the Obama administration during the election going, oh, there's nobody hacking. There's no possible way anyone could hack. There's no evidence of any tampering with this election. And it seems to me that, you know, the hacking thing was just going to slap. had Hillary won. But, you know, now that she lost, suddenly this thing becomes a huge issue after the election.

And by the way, it's been going on for years. Do you remember when North Korea is hacked into Sony? Remember, I guess it was about two, three years ago? Sony was hacked majorly by North Korea. There's been all kinds of incidents. of hacking. A number of years ago, a giant power grid and Ohio was shut down by hackers. Very dangerous.

And no real stink about it. You know, there's been all kinds of government websites hacked. There's hacking going on right now. There's always hacking. And the notion that suddenly Obama's in an uproar about it, you know, with, you know, eight days to go in his presidency. I just find it a little cheap and a little lowly. I mean, yes, we want to confront hacking.

We want to stop hacking. We want to have a strong defense against hacking. Are you kidding? Do you know the damage that could be done with hacking? I think you do. I mean, our whole society can be shut down through hacking. I mean, good Lord, they get into the power grids, they get into the power stations, they get into the airports, they get into the banking, they get into, I mean, you could just, you could shut a country down by hacking. But I'm just very suspicious of the way it's all gone down.

And, you know, the question's been thrown out there, and whatever side of the aisle you're on, the question has been thrown out there. had Hillary won the election, would Barack Obama have brought up all this stuff about the Russian hacking? And if I'm being objective, if I'm just being a guy right in the middle and trying to be honest, and if you are too, I think the answer is I doubt it. I seriously doubt it. Do you think if Hillary had won, he would have been like, oh, the Russians tried to take. hamper with the election results that the Russians tried to hurt Hillary, the Russians, no. I really don't think he would have. But because she didn't win, now suddenly it's a thing. And so we thought it best that we talked to a real expert.

Roger, do we have him on the line from Russia? Yes. Okay, we have a gentleman who, Is he a former KGB guy? Former. Okay, we have a former KGB agent on the line. His first name is Vladimir. What's his last name?

He wouldn't tell you. Well, that makes sense. We have Vladimir on the line, and we're going to discuss this very topical topic with someone, you know, right from the horse's mouth. Let's put him through, Raj. Hello. Hello, Vladimir.

Uh, hello, Vladimir, are you there, sir? Are you there in Russia? Hello, Mr. Williams. Yes, yes, uh, Vladimir. How are you today, sir? I am very good, Mr. Williams. It's very nice to talk to you. Um, yes, and Vladimir, do you have a last name? It's Vladimir. Smith. I'm sorry, sir? Smith. My name is Vladimir, Smith, Mr. Williams.

Smith? Yes. Okay, Vladimir Smith, not very Russian, but I guess... That is my name, Mr. Williams. Okay, and let's get right into this, this whole spying thing. Is this spying thing, you know, the USSR, the former USSR, Russia, spying on the United States of America? Is this thing even real?

6-9-1-24-1-1-3. I'm sorry, sir? 6-9-1-24-11-1-3. What is that? Is that some kind of a code? That, Mr. Williams, is your social security number. Wait a minute. 6-9-1-4.

Whoa. That is my... my social security number? That is what I just told you, Mr. Williams. Wait, how did you know my social security number, Vladimir? Mr. Williams, the Russian government are experts. It's spying. All these things you hear on the news, I heard your ramble, your monologue at the beginning

rambling about the fictitious nature of our capabilities. you mentioned the notion that perhaps maybe the Russians were not spying, trying to alter the election. I can assure you as a former, and I say, quote, former KGB agent, we are listening and looking at you in the United States of America all the time. Well, I don't even know how that's possible. I mean, how can you be looking at everything? and why would you want the social security number of just a regular citizen like me? It doesn't make sense.

I don't know if I believe you're monitoring everyone in the United States, Vladimir. 310559211. Wait a minute. What the hell was that? Oh, just a little thing. I call your cell phone number, Mr. Williams. Wait a minute. You can't say my...

cell phone number out over the air? Well, I guess we can or we can't, but it looks like I just can't. You did just can't. Wait a minute. Are you telling me you've got like all kinds of information on all kinds of people like this? Mr. Williams, don't underestimate the prowess of the Russian intelligence service, the KDB and our technological unit. and watching all the time, Mr. Williams. Okay, that's a little scary.

I mean, what if, you know, it's one thing to have like a social security number or a phone number? What about private, sensitive information? That's where I really get nervous. You mean like thunder sausage, Mr. Williams? I'm sorry? Do the words thunder sausage ring a bell? Thunder sausage? Don't act surprise, Mr. Williams.

I'm sure you're familiar with the term thunder sausage? Uh, no, I don't know. What is thunder sausage? How about your code name and password for the website aerialize and a-holes? What? You heard me, Mr. Williams, aerialize and a-holes. Your password for the pornography site is Thunder Sausage. Wait a minute.

Now, no. No, no, no, no, no. Aerolice and Aholes, Mr. Williams. Aerolize and A-Holes. I've never heard of it. Have you heard of the term Thunder Sausage? Can we get back to the election here? What about your erection, Mr. Williams? I didn't say erection, I said election. Do you mind if I share your pin number with your listening audience, Mr. Williams?

What do you mean my pin number? Well, how about 4-625? Hey, you got to knock this off. Aerial eyes and a-holes. Listen, I told you... 4625. I'm telling you... Aerialise and a-holes, thunder.

sausage. Would you knock it off? 6-9-1-24-11-13. Stop with my Social Security. Listen, you're making your point here. Thank you, Mr. Williams. I thought you would understand. You see, I don't appreciate when you go on the airwaves and underestimate and downplay the capabilities

of the Russian KGB and the Russian government. Okay, so clearly, you are able to tap in and spy on the average person. But that doesn't make it right. You shouldn't be interfering with an election or with people's private lives. Oh, your private life, Mr. Williams, is that what you'd like to talk about? No, I don't want to talk about my private life. Well, I'm glad you brought it up.

How about 592-176-5-5-27-2-7, Mr. Williams? Wait a minute, that's my checking account. Precisely, Mr. Williams. And can I remind you about thunder sausage, aerialis and a-holes? Would you stop with the a-reolize and a-holes? Now you're just trying to embarrass me. Well, Mr. Williams, everyone has their sexual needs. Those aren't sexual.

needs. That's just, everybody has looked at something dirty on the internet. Well, maybe you do have sexual needs, Mr. Williams. What is that supposed to mean? Do you mind if I share your password name for your Tinder account?

Don't go into my Tinder account. Come and get it girly is your password. Come and get it girly is none of your business. Well, it's the business of millions of American girls on Tinder. And don't forget some of those girls are all the way in Russia.

Are you serious, Mr. Williams? Come and get it, girly. Okay, you know what? I brought you on here to talk about the election and... What about your erection, Mr. Williams? I'm not saying erection. I'm saying election. Do the terms match.com ring a bell? Don't you dare release my match.com password?

Oh, you mean old? you can eat man toy? I asked you not to say all you can eat man toy. Is that what you do, Mr. Williams? When you can't get a date on Tinder, you go to Match.com, and when you

can't get a date there, maybe Thunder sausage goes to Aeolize and A-Holes. Would you stop talking about ariolize and A-Holes Vladimir Smith? Mr. Williams, I am just trying to accentuate a point.

that you should never underestimate the power and the stealth of the Russian spy networks, Mr. Williams. Okay, you've made your point, Smith, okay? Please, call me Vladimir Smith. It just sounds nice. Vladimir Smith. I don't know. Is there anything else you want to tell the world about my private life? Well, if you bring it up, why don't we? No, I wasn't. I was being sarcastic. How about milk that cow with a milf?

Milk that cow with a milth? Well, now, let's not pretend you've never been to that website, Mr. Williams. Look, Vladimir, bestiality and milfs aren't really my thing. Oh, is that so? Let me just check 300 visits to milk my cow with a milf. Well, you must be on someone else's computer because... I don't think so, Mr. Williams. Can I keep going because there are many other... No, we're out of time.

Thank you for talking to us, Vladimir Smith. We've got to go. We've got other things to cover in the show. If you say so, Thunder Sausage. Stop calling me Thunder Sausage. Maybe we can do a group chat on aerial ice and A-holes. Would you hang up on him, Roger? Don't hang up on me, Thunder Sausage.

I'll just call you back at 691-355-9-2. Hang up on him. Aerialize and a-ho. God! Good, I feel violated, man. What the hell? That was creepy. Holy crap.

Maybe there is something to all this stuff. Maybe Obama was right. Doc! God, can we just switch gears to something else? Oh, God. None of that stuff's true, by the way. Those aren't my phone numbers. It's not my...

I've never heard of these websites. None of it's real. I don't know where... Who was that guy? It's all made up. Anyways, let's talk about something that is real. Recently, a beloved icon that I think we all

had touch our lives Princess Leia Carrie Fisher passed away very recently and then tragically her mother passed away the next day but I wasn't really someone who followed her mother

but I think we all were some people listening we all to a degree followed Carrie Fisher or were familiar with her from her acting as Princess Leia in the Star Wars movies and

you know I don't know that she was a super talented actress you know it's not like she did Star Wars and then went on to do like a bunch of other movies it wasn't like she had the depth and the range of like

Meryl Streep but at the same time she accomplished something that's very difficult to do in life and that's to become a pop icon a cultural icon and sometimes that that can surpass raw talent you know you could be a super talented individual and uh you know if you don't get seen by the world uh all that talent passes you by it's kind of like you know there's really talented musicians out there who can play a guitar

upside down and with their teeth and you might have never heard of them but then uh you know you've heard of the guy that wrote the pop song 8, 6, 7, 5, 3,0, 9, 8, you know what I mean? So, Carrie Fisher will live in infamy due to, you know, her presence in that huge movie, that huge franchise known as Star Wars. And I think we're all saddened by the loss, and she was certainly part of many of us

as we grew up. And being a guy, a dude in Hollywood, I actually got to meet Carrie Fisher and I actually got to go hang out at her house and go to a party at her house. Yeah, that's right. I partied at Princess Leia's house, man. Threw back a few frosties at Princess Leia's house.

Pretty cool, man. And she lives out in Beverly Hills, up in kind of the hilly part of Beverly Hills. and I remember her house was kind of secluded and it was like a kind of a Spanish-style house and I remember being taken aback at the fact that, you know, with Kerry Fisher, I guess I didn't really marry her to kind of the Spanish-style home

and then when I got inside the home, it was even more interesting because she was such an eclectic person. I did not expect the interior decorating that befell me, if that's even a word, befell. I'm going to make it a word. Screw you. And I went into the house and into the various rooms in the house, and it was very quirky and a lot of interesting, like pottery and knick-knacks

and oddball paintings on the wall and mismashed furniture. And it was just such a departure from my... how I kind of perceived her. I guess I kind of perceived Carrie Fisher as maybe like kind of pretty normal and conservative. It's not like Carrie Fisher was a super exotic looking woman.

It wasn't like Carrie Fisher often made the news with her Hollywood escapades. You know, so I just kind of, I always kind of imagined that she was kind of a just a regular person. I imagined her house to be kind of you know the granite countertops and the you know the hardwood floors and the you know the stuff that

that people strive so hard to be normal with but no no no no you go in her house and uh it was it was just a real like collection of fun things and unusual things and and you you could just stand in any room and look around and see all kinds of cool paintings and and sculptures and and neat looking Furniture and just like pottery. Hey, everybody, who wants to have better sex? No, yes? Yes, the answer is yes. You always want to have better sex.

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This is an exclusive offer specific to this podcast. So be sure to use this code Harland so you get your discount and 100% free shipping code Harland. Have fun. Don't throw your back out. And it really gave me an insight into Kerry Fisher who actually, in my mind, suddenly became a little more quirky. And to accent the quirkiness, I found this very unusual.

I never forgot at it. At her own party, Carrie was, like, kind of not really present. Like, she'd pop out for a minute, and then she'd, like, disappear into her house, and then she'd, like, go into her bedroom and close the door, and, you know, then she'd be out in the living room for a few minutes, but she wasn't really out mingling with her own guests. It was very strange. It was a little bit surreal.

And I actually thought it was kind of neat because she totally, you know, when you have an idea of what a person might be like and what their surroundings might be like and you think you get their vibe, even though you don't know them, you're like, oh, I bet that person's like this, right? And then you meet them and you go to their dwelling

and it's a complete like turnaround of what you thought. And I thought, you know, I thought maybe you guys would like to have a peek at the inside of Kerry Fisher's house. So I went online and there's a really cool photo shoot that was done at her house and inside of her house. If you go to Architectural Digest.com and just type in Carrie Fisher's house

it will take you to a slideshow where you can actually kind of see the inside of her house. I don't know if any of you are interested in that type of thing, but I thought it was a neat experience. And Carrie was a very, she was very kind of quiet and pensive. And she kind of, you know, she's one of those people that had that look in her eye that, for lack of a better term, she looked a bit vulnerable. and looked like maybe she'd been hurt.

I don't know if that's accurate or not, but she had kind of that, a little bit of that look, you know, like, like she's been hurt and she was kind of vulnerable and kind of kept her guard up and kept a little distance, but yet she was very charming and engaging at the same time. I think there was a lot going on with Kerry Fisher, and, you know, with celebrity parents, Debbie Reynolds, and her father, you know, she certainly grew up in a very unique

and probably, you know, stressful environment. I mean, being the child of a big celebrity stars in Hollywood probably comes with a lot of weird stuff that most of us don't have to be exposed to. So if you're interested, go on Architectural Digest.com And you can see what I saw. Do you see what I saw? A house.

A house. Cherry Fisher's house, Princess Leia in the living room. Well, whatever. But even if you don't like Carrie Fisher and even if you're not a fan of architecture and stuff, it's actually worth a look because there's some really neat paintings on the wall.

You can see them. in these photos. There's some neat knickknacks. It's just a really kind of special layout. And as I said, it probably, you know, a lot of the times the things in people's houses are windows into their personalities and their past and their history and maybe their dreams and their futures. So if you want kind of a more grounded peak at what a princess in the galaxy far, far away was really like, uh, check it out. And, uh, in closing, I just want to say, rest in peace, Carrie. Uh, you did bring us a lot of joy. You did bring us a lot of fun and action and adventure and you, uh, you helped stimulate all of our imaginations, uh, easily.

And I, I especially imagine that you were quite the, uh, the hero for many little girls who saw strength in the character that you played, being a princess taking on a galaxy full of freaks, monsters, weirdos, and Darth Vader. So I hope you're resting in peace, and it was a pleasure to meet you and spend time in your presence, in your house, and may the force be with you.

Oh, yes, dear sweet Carrie Fisher, ladies and gentlemen. Here's something that was kind of sad, too, not to end the show on a downer, but this wasn't sad, it was just weird. You ever pass kids in your neighborhood with a lemmon? They set up a little lemonade stand, and you walk by or you drive by, and they're like, hey, mister, a dollar for a glass of lemonade, mister. And I remember when I was a kid, I used to try to do stuff like that where you'd try to sell something or you worked at a co-check and you hoped you got tips or you collected old pop bottles and took them in and you'd collect like 90 bottles and get about 40. But when you're a kid, when you get some money, when you get some money, when you earn it or you scrape and scrounge for it, it feels good, right? So over the years, there's been these little kids in my neighborhood, and I always see

them out there with the lemonade stands, you know, they do it a couple of times a year. And I always think, oh, man, but what would it be like if some guy just pulled up and gave those kids a $20 bill. You know, wouldn't that just make their day? Wouldn't they just love that? Because I know I would if I was a kid. So I'm that guy. Every time I see them, I, you know, once or twice, three times a year,

I'll pull up. I'll be like, hi, kids. And they're all like, do you want some lemonade, mister? Do you want some lemonade? Just a dollar a glass? And, you know, I can't drive and carry a glass of lemonade. And to be honest, I'm always. he's a little sketchy about how is the lemonade made, what's it made in, is it

powder, is it squeezed, is there sugar, is that, you know, I'm just, I don't know if little kids have the best health standards, you know, with their food prep. Like, I'm not going to ask a six and a half year old to bring me over, you know, some lobster Florentine and an omelet. I'm a little worried there might be mud under their fingers. your nails. You know what I mean? So I pull up and I go, you know what, kids? I love you're selling lemonade. I'm not thirsty right now, but here's $20 to help. Way to go. Good for you. And they just get all excited. Like, oh my God, like they almost get stunned. They almost like go silent. Like, wait, wait, wait, we only wanted a dollar, but that's a $20 bill. And then before they can really

figure out what just happened. I'm gone. I drive away. I'm waving. I'm like, thanks, kids, good luck. And it's almost like I did a drive-by with money. It's like I did a 20-buye. They're just standing there in the aftershock. So, you know, over the years I've done that, and then just the other day, I go out, and I didn't have any cash in my wallet. And to be honest, I didn't feel, I wasn't in the mood that day. It's like I'd given up the goods for these kids so many times. I'm like, you know what, not today. Today I'm not so loose with my lettuce, you know? I'm not giving up the, I've taken care of those kids plenty of time.

Today, no, today I'm just going for a drive. I'm not out to spend money on lemonade made from muddy fingers. But I figure I'd have a lot of credit with these kids because, you know, I've always hooked them up. I've always taken care of them. better than anyone else in the neighborhood. So I roll down and I drive by the lemonade's down. The girl jumps out with her little cardboard sign.

Lemonade, mister? And I just wave out. I go, no, not today. Thanks. No, sorry. And as I roll past, I hear in the most sarcastic voice,

I hear the kid go, thanks. And I'm like, wait, what did she just say? Thanks. And now it's playing in my, head on a loop. Thanks. Almost like I did them bad. I did them wrong. I'm like, way, way, way, way. Don't, don't lay thanks on me, kid, lemonade kid with the dog poo under your fingernails.

I'll call the health inspector on your little lemonade stand and shut you down. No, I won't do that, but boy, that got, that got in, that, you know, that got under my, that hurt. Thanks. You know, because it wasn't a thanks like thanks for for everything it was like thanks for not giving us some money and support ass munch that's what that kid's thanks was and I realized in that moment that I didn't have any credit with these kids

what happened to oh that's the nice man that always stops and give us a $20 bill and he doesn't even want a lemonade he just gives us money he's so nice he's so friendly But no, I get, thanks. Oh, God.

I'm going to have nightmares. Oh, thanks. But I'll tell you what, it's not going to make me bitter. You know, that's what I actually like about kids, their honesty. And maybe it's a good thing. It's a reminder that with kids, you don't really build up credit. You know, kids are like those little birds. You ever see baby birds in the nest and their mother flies down?

and their mouths are open and like, sheep, sheep, sheep, sheep, sheep, sheep. And the only way they can get fed is they just, they're just screeching at their mother. And their, you know, their mother has to stick her head down their throat and puke up or whatever she's been eating and, like, regurgitate it down there. And they don't care.

The kids are just a baby, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep. Give me more. I can puke in my mouth. Peep, beep, beep. And then the mother flies off to get more food and the kids don't. The baby birds don't. care? They're like, oh, what a mother.

You know, that was one of the best throat pukings I've ever had. What a special mother. Those birds are just like, hurry up, bring me some more regurgated mush, fish, insects, lizards, I don't care. Beep, beep, beep, beep. And I think kids are kind of fun like that because maybe they do, maybe they don't. But I have a feeling kids don't really, you know, maybe they don't understand the world of commerce and money and finance quite the way an adult does.

So maybe you don't collect brownie points with the kids. Maybe. But now I'm thinking back when I was a kid now, and maybe what I just said isn't accurate, because I remember if anyone ever gave me a helping hand or gave me some money or my neighbor who took us to Dairy Queen sometimes and paid for everything for me and my sisters, like that was huge.

That guy had huge brownie points with us. we liked that guy better than we liked our parents so now maybe I'm even more feeling like bummed out that maybe these kids should have remembered me and I instead of getting hey okay thanks anyhow we love you you always took care of us now it hurts twice as much that I got a thanks

thanks for nothing but I don't hate the kids I'm, you know, in fact, I like the kids. I admire the kids for being out there, being entrepreneurial, and trying their best, and, you know, if they have to use me as a vessel for their frustration that they haven't made a lot of sales that day, well, I'm willing to take it for the kids

because I like kids, and I like kids that get out there and make an effort to do things in life. I admire those type of children. And I guess they can't understand that, you know, maybe I'm just one of those days where I just didn't want to stop. I just didn't want to engage. I just didn't want to. Maybe it's because I was going to get something to eat and I was hungry and I was just like, oh, I just want to go buy my. And I almost thought about going the other way around them to get home.

I was thinking, you know, I should go around another street so I don't have to pass them. But then, of course, I passed them. I drove past them again. I did go get something to eat, and I was driving home, and there they were again with the sign. And this time I was like, she held it up, and she's like, lemonade, sir. And I held up a glass of Coke from Chipotle,

and I went, no, thanks, I got a Coke, sorry. And I just drove on past, and at least the second time I didn't get, thanks. But the kids look so sweet and innocent And I almost went back I almost went back and said I'll have a 20 damn it Just have a 20

But I didn't But now I've made a mental note And next time Yes next time I pass the lemonade kids I'm going to give them a big fat Juicy 20 Okay Okay so hopefully instead of a

Thanks I'll get at a, thanks. Thanks, Mr. Okay? So I'll let you know what happens. I think we'll end the show on that cheery note right there. Hey, let me make a few announcements here. I want to let you know about my next stand-up comedy gig. Yes, sir. If you're in Florida, come to West Palm Beach, baby. West Palm Beach, January 19th through the 22nd. West Palm Beach Improv Comedy Club. club so much fun great city great town uh west palm beach improv january 19th that's a thursday through sunday the 22nd okay and then back on the west coast january 26 to 28th i'll be in tacoma

washington at the tacoma comedy club i haven't been there i hear it's amazing i'm super excited to go there so all my fans on the west coast in washington and vancouver and Oregon. If you can make the trip, Seattle, come on out to Tacoma. Let's party in Tacoma, bro. Thanks. And then going into February,

I'll be at Charlie Goodnights in North Carolina, February 9th through 12th. Haven't been there for a while. And then back up to Washington in February to Spokane. Or Spokane. I don't know how you spoke in it, but I'm spokane in it the way it's Spokane to Spokone. February 16th to 18th and Spokane, Washington. And then in March, it'll be in Phoenix.

But you know what? Go to my website, harlandwiliams.com. And you can check out all of my upcoming stand-up comedy gigs on the stand-up link at harlandwilliams.com. Also, we have a great little store in there where you can buy some really fun merchandise. Also, you can write me there if you want to leave any comments about the podcast on the comments page, on the contact page, and you can call me and leave me a voicemail. 3-2-3-9-43-3-3-3-3-3. It rings about seven times before it picks up. It's a screwed-up answering system, but we do take your messages. So hang in there.

your message. And don't forget to get the free app for your cell phone, the Harland Highway app. Just go into your app store, type in the Harland Highway, boom, it's free. And if you want more than you can handle of me and this podcast, you can join our premium membership for $20 a year, which is next to nothing. And throughout the year, you'll get extra bonus material that the rest of you who don't go premium won't get. So a little teaser, a little fun thing for you if you want to spend an extra 20

and have some bonus material in your life. And I thank everyone who has become a premium member. Thank you so very much. It's awesome. And I'll be bringing you some cool, groovy stuff in the weeks and months ahead. And that's it for today. I hope you had a good time. Until next time, everybody.

Chicken, chalming, baby. Have you heard of the term thunder sausage?