The Harland Highway - 87 - RACHEL STERLING

Episode Date: December 19, 2023

Beautiful Rachel Sterling, actress, model, stand up, discusses being in Playboy, dating, relationships, and her dog named Chico! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

He was into said feet, and I was like, oh, okay, this is happening. And I was like, oh, you're going to put this in your mouth? I'm like, right? Wait, he put your foot in his mouth? In his mouth. It was in his mouth. And I'm like, oh, and I was like, okay, maybe this will end quickly. Because that's what women do.

When you guys are doing something, you guys think is great. We're just like, maybe it's going to be over soon. Wait a minute. If you're grossed, if you're even grossed out by your own feet, and then he's putting him in his mouth, And then you got to kiss that mouth. I didn't. Did you get athletes' mouth?

I just didn't. You're riding down the Harland Highway. All right, hold tight on the Harland Highway Show. Harland Williams. Always. I don't know if you should trust a, you know, a comedian or without bags under their eyes. I mean it's not working hard. You think you have bags under your eyes?

I have so much makeup on just to look kind of human. Get out. You look amazing. Thank you. I feel like 12 out of 10 in my books. Oh, you're amazing. Well, you don't get out of the house much, I don't think. That's right.

Well, you don't have, I don't see any bags under your eyes. Really? Dark circles? No. There's a few faint, cute little freckles. Those are there, yeah. Do you love freckles or do you hate them? I hated them when I was younger. What?

And then now, I've just accepted them now because, I mean, this is, okay, so this is my last year in my 40s. No. Oh, way. I would have thought you're in your 20s. Yeah, my agent will kill me for saying that on camera, but I feel like that you, it's like I have to say it because I wasn't allowed. I had to be 26. I was 26 for over a decade once.

Once. Oh, yeah. It was a very long year. It was a 12 year, 26 year old. It was a very long time because it was a female in the entertainment industry. If you start, if you start with comedy, maybe it's different. Yeah. You're kind of encouraged to like, do you?

Yeah. That's why I love it so much now. If you make the mistake of capitalizing on any part of your looks or sexuality and you're good at it, they will not let you age. They don't let you age. Everything's very regulated. Wait, so your last year of being in your 40s, so you're 49. Crap.

Oh, I just had a birthday. Yeah, crept off on me. I knew I was in my 40s. I just didn't know where are my 40s I was falling because I don't subscribe to age one. Yeah. I think it's ridiculous. I'm not really allowed to say how old I am anyway. Yeah, and we didn't.

We just, I just made that up, really. Yeah, you know, wink, wink. So. Wait, so you're a Scorpio. I am. I'm 1111-11-11, 14. 11-11. Yeah.

I'm 11-14. Happy birthday. Happy birthday. 23-year-old. Thanks. I'm planning to go through puberty next week. I'm only 13. Wow.

Yeah. Good look with that. Yeah, I can play your game. There we go. I can play your age game, Benjamin, Zachary buttons. I loved that book Or that short story rather I just watched the movie

You don't read the book? It's just this big You know it's crazy that it's only this big What is a book for elves? It's a little teeny, it's a very thin book But it's only that big? It's like, I've seen like, I've seen Where'd you read it in a dollhouse?

Yeah, I've seen like cheesecake factory menu menus because of that Oh God, the cheesecake factory menu They were overwhelming They're too big Too much. It's so big. I went through a cheesecake factory menu.

It was so thick. There was revelations at the back of it. Right? And it's like, it's the only menu in the world that has, you can buy stuff in it. You get to page 46. I bought a dress online at cheesecake factory.

A cheesecake factory dress. Yeah. It wasn't, it was a Dolce and Gabana. It wasn't. Yeah. How do you say it? Delce Gabana.

How do you say it? Delche Gabana. Isn't it Dolce and Gabana? I don't know. I say Gulte Gabana. How do you say? I guess it is and there's an and in there. There is?

Yeah, there's two dudes. It's Dolce and, mm-gabana or and? I have a stuffed nose, first of all. Oh, wow. It's all full of, no, it's all full of, it's all full of, no, it's off of, it's, yeah, I have allergies, so. What are you allergic to? I am allergic to everything.

Really? I had no allergies as a child. Yeah. And then all of a sudden. Godwin, you've had it too easy. Boom, you're allergic to everything. I am allergic to pineapple. Oh, God.

I love pineapple. You do? You can't eat it anymore. Nope. Can't even be in the airspace. And you know pineapple is great for bags under your eyes. Yeah, it actually is really good for all tummy problems because of the enzymes. It's great for your face.

Really? Do you ever just rub the juice before pre-allergy? Did you used to rub pineapple on your face? No, but I used to love Hawaiian Punch. Oh, God, domestic abuse. I loved it. Oh, I loved it. Oh, okay.

Sorry. It's a drink. It's a drink. Okay, I was like, wow, this girl's into some weird stuff. No wonder she's got bags under her eyes. A couple of Hawaiian punches will get that going for you. Yeah. Oh, that's too bad.

Marijuana. You're allergic to marijuana? Bad, because there's so many strains of it. Yeah. I don't know which ones I'm allergic to because it's not all of them. I often say that it's the ones that smell like poverty and sadness that I'm allergic to you. Wow. So basically just poor people.

I'm just kidding. The cheap pot, huh? The cheap pot, like the gross. God. The gross kind, I guess. Because some stuff doesn't really bother me. So wait, if you smoke pot, what was the moment you found out you were allergic to it? Like what happened?

You were having fun at a party and all of a sudden your face swelled up? Like, what happened? I've only smoked pot three times. my life so once in college with a bong like an idiot like an idiot and i didn't know how to do it but i had asthma i'm like it's like your inhaler and like okay so i held that shit in and my i was burning my soul was burning and the inside out and i was like no that's some good weed when it burned your soul i burnt my soul some satan grass right there burnt my soul my ancestors are like whoa Whoa, your ancestors were screaming up in the graveyard.

They were like, what are you doing? Wow. And then I smoked pot with Hugh Hefner, and then I smoked pot with Willie Nelson. Because both of those people, you're like, eh, well, you know, I'll take some better joke on it. Yeah. Let's just see what happens. With Willie Nelson, you kind of got a smoke pot with him, don't you? You can't, you can't.

Yeah. You made a silent agreement the second you walked through the door. Yeah. And also, it was just permeating the air. So I'm like, I'm already probably going to have to go to the ER. So let's just be cool. Let's just, I always said that, like, God was like, we don't want her to be too cool.

Let's make her allergic to marijuana. Willie's the only guy you smoke a doobie with him. When he hands it to you, there's a tooth on it. Right? Seriously, there's like a tooth sticking out of it, like one of his teeth. That's the little. Didn't my parents used to have, didn't our parents have like the little, like,

what's they call them, roach clips? Your parents did? Yeah, they're like little... Wait, so you didn't tell me what happens to you when you go allergic? Like, what happened when you're in front of Willie Nelson? Nothing, thank God, because he doesn't smoke poor people shit.

Oh, wow. It's a joke that I'm doubling down, I'm working on it. But, like, I've just hit a level of stupid that I didn't think I could hit until because it was it was intense it was some intense and i don't smoke weed i'm not a weed smoker yeah yeah and i was like it's like it's like you fell like it's like you fell a little it's it feels like you just i don't know you sunk into another dimension wow okay yeah so

that's what it felt like and then i was just sitting there like trying not to have that to do i was like i must have a dumb look at my face i must yeah i must and like all the cool people are there and i'm like Wait, who else was there? If you're smoking with Willie Nelson, there's got to be some other cool, like, was it Hollywood celebs? Yeah, I mean, I don't remember everybody in the room. It was, you know, Kid Rock was in the room.

Kid Rock. Willie Nelson. Like a bunch of, a bunch of industry people. Donnie Osmond? No. No. I would like to see Donnie Osmond.

Would you? Hi. That would be hilarious. Would you go out of allergic some to smoke weed with Ozmen? husband? Yeah. Just because, you know, I've lived a very full life and I don't think I would have anything to say about my life had I ever had any common sense or not when, you know what?

Let's just see what happens. Let's just see what I'm one of those people like, oh, let's do this because you never know when they'll have another opportunity. And little did I know when I was younger. I'm like, I had no idea. I'm like, oh, when you are young and pretty, there's lots of opportunities. Yeah, yeah. I could have said no a few times to some shit.

Right. I didn't. But the door just, when you're young and beautiful, the door was just open. The door was open. I lived in a worldly gas. It was great. Was there anything that anyone denied you? Anything that anyone said no to?

Being a super model because I'm short. Oh, really? That was a hard no. That was a hard. Had I known, did you know that you can break your legs and be taller? I didn't know that. You can. You can break you.

I had no fucking clue. Tell, talk to you. me. Let me tell you all you short bits out there. Um, it's, it's not going to be fun. Um, don't get your cousin to do it. Go to a doctor. They, they surgically break your legs and then they set it back in these like little erector set looking things. And so your bones, when you're young, you have to do it when you're young. Oh, you're young. Your bones, your bones go back fast. And you just gain like two or three inches. But when you're young, you don't really, have you finished growing yet? So you don't know how tall you're going to be i we all know that height can overgo a lot of things like you could be like

unattractive and as a guy and still be tall and you you're good yeah your bed could be on the floor as long as you're tall you sound like okay would you have done it would you have had you known snapped your legs oh i know i was going to be short i knew i was going to be short i was the smallest i I was so small. Really? I was shmall. You were small. I was small.

I was small. I was small. I was so tiny. Wow. I would like that girl, what was her name, Dolores Claiborne or whatever? Who is the girl from misery? That's how you want to get your legs broken. She just runs in and does it quick with the sledgehammer.

Wham. Kathy Bates. She's so great in that. Thanks. She's so amazing. Thank you. I hate this. Thank you so much.

I just know, like, was there, was she, was she like, how did she prepare for that? I just, wait, not me. Why did I think it was me? Are you channeling chat? I think because you threw out a compliment that was so good and I thought I might as well, she's not here to grab it. Why don't I? You're accepting on her behalf.

Yeah, that's what I was doing. That's what you're doing. Is that okay? I think it's okay. I think it's all right. Okay. Well, before we get too much further, let's hit the theme music. uh folks rachel sterling is here today we've already established her beauty we've already

established her allergies we've already established the non-existent bags under her eyes but what else can we tell you she's a comedian an actress a beautiful model a beautiful human being and uh didn't you um didn't you do a stint and you said you smoked with hughner right i did so were you were you were in playboy i was What was that like? Because the average person watching, like, take us through the process. Is it a process? So it was an interesting process.

So the first time I was in Playboy, I don't even remember because I don't do, this is what happens when you live, I read so much you don't remember a year. Yeah. But I was in college, and so I did the college girl issue. And I didn't actually want to do it. My friend wanted to do it. I went with her, and she's like, you're doing it with me. And I said, okay.

So I just went in. And all these model types, even though they're supposed to be college students, they still look like models. We were very ill-prepared for this. Yeah, yeah. We're like, we should go. And, you know, I didn't have, like, do you have a headshot? And I was really, like, kind of thoroughly about it because I was just like,

I'm just here for her. Like, you guys aren't going to pick me. I'm not. Yeah. I'm not played my material. Isn't that always the way, though? It's the person that doesn't give an F that ends up getting, you know. I thought they'd never picked me because my mom.

was very like liberal let's put it that way so she she left a lot of stuff out but I thought she just thought I wouldn't understand it was a playboy was one of them and my mom was very beautiful and all her friends were beautiful I just assumed that when you grow up that's what happens and so wait that you look beautiful yeah I had both like I was just like I was like I didn't it was a shock to me when I said going like school like what's all with your mom no just kidding. My mom's defective. She was so good looking.

They thought she was defective. Yeah, they got to send her back. So I just like, oh, okay, then this is normal. And then I started, you know, when I should have hit puberty, I really didn't. Yeah. I remember I went to the doctor and I was like, is something wrong? Am I really 11? Just tell me.

Wait, what? I thought it was because I looked so young. Like I was such a late bloomer. Yeah, yeah. That's a good thing. it is now at the time it was not yeah when i'm 87 it's great but uh as a as a you know pre-teen teenager growing up in san diego oh wow in the 90s yeah during the grunge era grunge yeah it's uh it was rough it was rough i looked i i don't know what it looked like i just did you go by

your name when you did the how many times did you do playboy Six total. Six. Did you go by your name, Rachel Sterling, or did you have a... Only the last one. What was the name before? I won't tell you. You're going to look for it.

If I tell you mine, will you tell me yours? Really? Yeah. Okay, because I got some exciting new one of the... You have you. Well, I'm in... You're not even Playboy layout? I'm in Playboy this, the Christmas edition.

I want to show you my cover. Yeah. I'm really excited. There we go. Oh. Look at you. Playboy. Look at that.

Cherry Williams. I go by Cherry. Cherry? Oh, that's your name? Yeah. Miss December I got. When was this? This is this month.

This is coming up. This is the first look at this. Oh, this is the mock up. Yeah. No, this is the cover. This is it. This is it. Okay.

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I gotta get one of those I love how it's like What You've got Jessica Alba on there Wait have you ever done penthouse Because I did I have I did

You dirty hoe Well I did Penn House I figure if I'm gonna do Playboy I might as well do Penthouse Well they're wildly different. But look, I got pet of the year. Cherry got pet of the year. It's tons. Thank you. Make your paper, Bufo. What was that? Make your paper. I mean, you're not jealous, are you? Very, I'm very jealous. No one's ever asked me.

You've never done, you've never been Pennhouse Pet of the Year? I've never been Penhouse Pet of the Year. No. I feel like there's a lot of work that goes in that. I'm quite lazy. Cherry has. Cherry has. Cherries. I got to hang out with Cherry more. Like. Cherry can get you the hookup. If you ever want to do Hustler or my next one. No, I'm doing in the spring, I'm doing busts, boobs, and bazongas. Banzongas. You know, that's a word we get on here, enough. Yeah.

Well, you'll hear it more when my issue comes out. Banzongas. Bust, boobs, and bazongas. It's going to be Milk Jug Girl, 2024. There you go. Yeah. Why do I feel like that's a thing, though? What?

Milk jug girl. I feel like that's a. Well, that's what I'm going to be. That's what they told me. You know what I'm thinking. of i think it's it's making me like didn't wasn't there like it was it a real magazine or was it something i just put on movies was jugs a real magazine it was real it was real okay because you always see it like on tv shows yeah oh yeah like the kid gets in trouble because he's got one

jugs you were never in jugs he's never in jugs i had to buy my jugs so yeah oh you bought i had a buy mine you bought your you bought your judge i had to buy mine how much so your you paid for these i paid how much is like most people watching i know but these people watching, they don't know. How much is a pair of jugs? I wouldn't even know now. When you buy your jugs, how much? When I, okay, so here's a funny story.

So when I went into Playboy for, I tested for a playmate. It's so funny because I've done so many different Playboys didn't get to Playmate in this country. What? And I did, yeah, they had a problem with me. What was the problem? There's a horrible woman named Maryland. I don't know if she's still alive,

but she looked 10,000 years. when I was 20, so she pulled me in her room and got, okay, so when she went down the list. She's like, you need to fix your hair, fix your face, fix your teeth, get rid of your eyebrows, stop making that face, baby fat needs to go. She's like, yeah, she doesn't need to buy implants. Like all the things that were wrong with me, and then I was broken. I was like, right? So that's funny when people say, you know, stand-up comedy is hard.

I'm like, you have no fucking idea what hard is. Yeah, unless you're reading jugs, then you have a big idea what hard is. You go to auditions in the late 90s, early 2000s, and have them to your face break down how much you suck. Did you burst out in tears? I did. I did it burst out. Wait, so this is for the skin magazine trade, they break you down.

No, I don't think for the skin magazines and Playboy are two totally different things. Okay, because I had no issues when I wanted. Playboy back in the day was, they considered themselves quite classy. So they had standards, which is very interesting. My experience with Playboy was great. My experience with Huff was great. I know a lot of people wasn't. Mine was fine.

Did you have to, uh, with him? No. Did he try to, with you? Nope. Never tried to. Not his type. What's, that's when he had the seven blonde girlfriends. You only like blondes.

Remember he went through that phase. but they were all blonde. Well, let me ask you this. Were you offended? Did you want to be with half? No. Oh, good. Work smarter, not harder, honey.

Good. I like that. Good. Good. Yeah. Because that guy, to be honest, was creepy.

Like creepy old guy in bathrobe with pipe. But you have to understand. I was 20-something years old. All Hollywood was was creepy. Yeah. Like it's not creepy now? It's still,

but see, now I'm old though. So it's like, I don't bother. This doesn't bother me that much. I feel bad for the young girls now. I'm like, well, I'm so sorry. You know what kept half off of me when I went up and did my spread as cherry?

You did your spread. If you're going to laugh, maybe this is the podcast for me. I mean, well, for me it was a spread, believe me. It was a spread eagle, actually. If you're going to laugh. But what I did as kind of a preemptive move to keep a. off. I have a tramp stamp. I got a tramp stamp of Willie Nelson eating a

slice of key lime pie, just holding it up and I had them put a little shimmer on his tooth. And just like, and that like... The shimmer blinds him? Well, no, it just when I got naked in front of him, because he does a, you know, he does a body, he does a little recon. And when I turned

around... Well, I'm just saying, I'm sorry. But when I turned around, he said, oh, pretend you dropped a pencil. And there was Will Willie Nelson, and when my skin stretches, it looks like Willie's sliding the pie into his mouth and the tooth is about to bite it. And I think it turned them off.

It worked. Well, you know, whatever works. Yeah. So I never had to lay down for half. You know, us girls, it's about ducking and weaving. It is? It is. It's got to duck and weave.

It's got to maneuver. Is it a nightmare? Like, you must be maneuvering around men every day constantly. Not so much anymore. I mean, that's one of the glory. of getting older um what yeah dudes my own age or consider or older dudes yeah they're not that into me because they want younger women young guys it's you got to maneuver around that a lot yeah um i don't think i've dated anyone my age in a really long time old you go older or younger younger

you're like what what's your what's your cutoff my cutoff yeah Remember you're talking to chairing here. You know what? I'm going to cancel. I'm going to cancel. I don't know. At least old enough to get into a bar. So 18? No, that's a little too young. Sure.

I mean, I've gone on a day with a 19-year-old, but I was younger. I was in my 30s. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now I don't know. And I'm currently dating someone who's 29, which sounds so much better than 28 when I met him. Yeah. but my friends are like rage so i think i know the obvious but what what's the uh the appeal to the

younger like what what is it was it psychological is it physical is it what's what's keeping you in the young zone versus it's not my fault i swear it's not my fault because one i can't you can't tell hold anyone is in this town yeah it's really hard to tell yeah super hard to tell oh my god I thought that was my dog. I was scared the shit. Sorry, guys. There's a, there's a small, little, little, little, my, my, we're Frenchie here. And he's, he's adorable.

His name is Cheiko. He's amazing. You know what we'll do as a tease as a little cock tease to the audience? Huh. Why don't we tease them and say, in a few minutes, we're going to bring the Frenchie up and put them on, let him do a spread on the table. He will do a spread there. He has no shame.

He better. No shame that dog. But we won't put them up yet, but because people, with my podcast, what you'll find out is people tune in, tune out real quick. Like, they'll come in, but then they hear me talking, they look at me, and they just bail. They're out. They, they, but if I tease them. Oh, yeah. If I tease these folks out here.

There's a Frenchie. There's a Frenchie coming. He is, like adorable. He is a little nugget. He's just, ugh. Oh, you know, we should start a, like, a porn magazine for dogs. Like play dog or something. Play dog.

Pent dog. Pent dog. Hustle dog. Something like that. Bus, boobs and beagles. Oh. You know what I mean? Like just have a spread like Mr. December or Missy.

Lassie. Imagine Lassie on a velvet couch or the pipe. Lassie. Lassie was Lassie a boy? Was she a biotch? No, I think Lassie was the wrong. wrong sex. What do you mean?

It wasn't the dog that played Lassie. Was Lassie supposed to be a boy or a girl? I think Lassies, well, Lassie in Scotland, if you're a lass. It's supposed to be a boy. But in Scotland, if you're a lass, you're a lady or a woman. Oh, there's a sweet Lassie. Look at that sweet Lassie over there. So maybe it was a trick.

It was a boy, but so they didn't have a lawsuit, they gave it a girl's name. and they were like, if you, the TV audience can't figure it out, screw you. I can't remember which one it was supposed to be, but I know that it was supposedly it was like the opposite sex of what the... Oh, wow. And you can't tell with all that hair. I mean, you can't.

On camera, you'd have to go down there and feel around, really. No, no. Yeah, no. So just again, to reiterate, we got some great conversations planned, Ian Rachel, but we are going to tease you because I know many of you are hopping off, many of you are bailing out. Some of you are probably opening your car doors and bailing out. We are in a few minutes, and I'll keep playing that out.

I'll probably put the French up in the last minute. There we go. But I'll tell them because they're not that swift. I wish I had to put clothes on him now. Well, maybe he does have clothes. Maybe he's in a funny suit. See, this is another teaser. We build it up.

We tease them. But there will be a Frenchie right up here on the Harland Highway podcast table soon. Um, so going back to you and, and, uh, juvenile boys. Juvenile boys. Uh, okay. What, what is, so you, you don't, obviously, it's, is it more of a physical thing? Well, I don't seek them out. I don't, I don't, I don't go.

I'm only going to date this, this age group or I don't, I don't, I don't, not like hitting the college dorms or anything like that. Are you all one of those apps, like older women, younger men thing or whatever? I hate apps. You do, okay. I was on one app just because every, I don't know. I had just broken up with the, I was newly single and like, you should go on an app. And I, I did.

And I was on Raya. It's really hard to be on the app because it's everyone you already know. And I'm like, why am I on this app? I know already. You've already turned down everyone on Raya. Well, also, it's just like, why are, they have a, they have a feature that says for friends. And I'm so confused by it.

And I'm just like, so this is literally for friends. Or is this for people, because there are, like, I don't use or allow my Instagram to be used as a dating app. Okay. But there are people that I slid into the DMs. I'm like, I didn't even see the DMs, because you're in a section called Restricted. I literally don't see anything. I have to, like, follow you, you have to follow me. And then also there's so many that come in.

I'll only see, like, the first 10, Navy. And they're usually people I talk to them. the algorithm you only see the people you talk to you all the time so it's like it's really hard sometimes it actively look because for stand-up people hit you up yeah right all the time so sometimes i'm like oh i'm just kind of who look who's whatever says comedy in the thing and i'm like okay i'll check that one yeah yeah um sometimes you'll hit me up to do a show on on the on the uh instagram you're like hey you want to come down and do a spot or whatever Do a spread.

Start calling them spreads. Spreads. You want to come down and do a spread? A spread. I'm never going to hear that word the same. I think we better show them my cover again, just so they know. It's not a layout. It's a spread.

It's a spread. It's a spread. It's a spread. Okay, cherry is a poppin' pet of the year. Sorry, I keep sniffling too. That's okay. It's okay. You're probably allergic to cherry.

I don't mean to be vain. Like, I keep showing this and holding it up because you're here. But I think maybe, you know, people want to see, you know, it's always about women's rights. And what about a man having a chance on the cover of pen? I think you've got to give the people what they want. Give cherry a chance. Give cherry a chance. When does cherry get to pop?

That's your, that's your merch. Give cherry a chance. Yeah. Give cherry a chance. Vote cherry. Let cherry spread. Let cherry have her spread. Was there ever a nightmare story when you were doing your spread that, that something just

was like, like a photography? was creepy or there was a prop that would make you uncomfortable or they put you on a beach and a starfish got stuck to your ass or something horrible um like a barnacle on your um i'm really trying to think because you know when i was a model earth was still cooling so that was a while ago oh come on a long time ago um i think the worst i mean i think when i was younger obviously you have higher metabolism so you're not too worried about stuff. Is that my dog? That's the French.

I love it. He's just smashing into it. By the way, we are going to put a beautiful French up here in just a couple of minutes. We walk in. Yeah. And then he goes, I have a treat for him. I'm thinking it's going to be a biscuit. He comes out with his bone.

Giant bone for Chico. It is a femur. It's so big. It's like a zebra femur. Yeah, it's pretty almost longer than Chico. It's bigger. And he's like, yes. Yeah, it's like that scene in the Flintstones

when they put the giant rib on the car and the car falls over. Oh, my God, yes. Just as a teaser, I don't know. You know, I know many of you have bailed. We're going to bring Chico up and his giant bone for his spread, for his Chico's spread. Chico's first spread.

That should be a kid's book. They grow up so quick. Yeah, Chico's first spread. Dear little Chico went for a run. He ended up at you, Hefner's house. Oh, no, no. It was spread like a bun.

No. Oh, gosh. Tico, cover your ears, earmuffs. So going back to the dating thing, what, what? Dating thing. We live in a weird world. We do. What do you think men want these days from a woman's point of view?

Because I feel like it's just so confusing now. People are scared to date. People don't know who's gender. People don't know this. It's so weird. the way what do you think is like what do you think men are looking for from your perspective men yeah it's a different though because some people are boys some people are men yeah and it's not really an age thing it's just where they are in their everyone on their own time

yeah um it kind it's very interesting because you always have like podcasters or just people or other comics that i've heard talk you know they are like oh i'm supposed to they'll kind of like roast a girl that is doing like only fans or that kind of type of lifestyle yeah but they're the girl they're the guys asking for nudes I'm like it's kind of hypocritical bro right so so the same guys that are roasting the girls are the same guys looking at the material I'm seeing is that right I saw I saw I was looking for something saw this little between two people that I won't mention and I was like I specifically know three girls that you're you've asked for nudes from.

I'm probably still have them in your phone. So you can't really, like, be like, oh, I'm supposed to, like, this is supposed to be the mother of our children. But then you're still, you know what I mean? Like, just be quiet or pick aside. I think be quiet is the best way to go. Yeah.

But are we living in an age, though, where it's getting near impossible to find a spouse or a partner or even someone to date who hasn't displayed something publicly or privately that's sort of sexual in nature, like a risque pitcher or even, even, you know, I've got to be honest, even like a slinky bikini pitcher could be maybe too provocative, you know? I don't know.

It depends. I think it depends what kind of lifestyle you're living, where you live. I mean, I'm pretty sure that there's people in, like, you know, parts of the Midwest that, yeah, they don't have anyone on their feed that is. or they'll never be in physical contact to date a person that has ever made money off of or gotten attention for wearing a bikini. But is that fading, do you think? No.

You think it hasn't permeated into the Midwest. It's mostly a coastal thing or it's sort of a hipper lifestyle, a more provocative lifestyle. I think that, I think it's more normalized for sure. Yeah. You know, like back in the day, you couldn't. You know, to go from, like, any type of what we'll call glamour modeling and or of Clayboy or anything that was considered, you know, you know, hotel porn type stuff. Even, like, girls have gotten in trouble, not in trouble, but, like, had a hard time with the girls gone wild stuff when they got older. Like, I wish I did that.

Oh, yeah. So it's like, it wasn't quite as accepted. Right. Back in the day. I mean, I've lost jobs from having pictures that were they considered like, oh, we don't want playmates, we don't want this, we don't want that. So I lost like a Pepsi commercial after I booked it because of it. I had, I had, I had, which, now they didn't, I wish the meat, I wish, what's, what, what,

what's the limitations on the years that you can sue someone because there was, there was. I think they extended it. They extended. I think it just got extended like the statute of limitations. I was harassed. I wasn't, like, sexually abused or anything, but, like, what happened was... Oh, really? I'm sorry. I know, no payday.

But, like, there was a... I did a commercial. Yeah. It was a... It was a half-time commercial, so, you know, those pay a lot of money. Yeah, for... When I started doing... For the Super Bowl?

Yeah, and I booked it, I shot it, and, um, come on the day, I know when I look, it's like a pull-out shot, I look, oh, there's like a pull-out shot, I look, and I look, and it's different girl wearing my clothes doing the same scene i have everyone waiting i feel stupid call my agent he's like yeah so about that uh they had to slip you meaning they had to take you out because on the day i shot it they were doing one of the lighting guys i guess had a magazine where i had no clothes on you were doing a spread i was doing a spread and he didn't say anything to me and during the lunch, mind you. The director's there. The casting director is there.

The makeup, there's a very large cast of people that are in the room. You know, there's just two actors. Come on. There are people from Visa because it was a Visa. It was for Visa. Okay. People there. Wait, I thought you so did it's for Pepsi.

No, this is it. I lost a different one for Pepsi. This is for Visa. And they didn't say anything to me. Probably because they lost your visa. Probably because they didn't know what to do because it probably hasn't been, hasn't happened and he not he went on his lunch to go get the magazine and show everyone which now that guy would be sued and fired in the whole thing because i it doesn't matter if

i did that for a job this is today this is a different set i've i've not exposed myself on set and this guy did it for me yeah and then they freaked out and because oh well now we got a puller So I lost a job. What's a puller? They got a polar out of the, out of the thing. Oh, okay. So I lost the job for it and the residuals. So now that.

How much? I mean, it was a commercial in the early 2000s. Probably a few hundred grand. You know, people used to buy houses from that. People used to become millionaires from doing commercial. You did five commercials in a year. You were bank. Yeah.

You know what? The ironic thing is you got fired from a Pepsi commercial. Oh, Pepsi for the same thing. So meanwhile, cut to Britney Spears, who did Pepsi commercials, who was the kind of epitome of sexual kind of suggestive behavior. I mean, she did these, these almost like half porn rock videos, and her whole act was sexuality. Yeah, but she can't do it.

She can do it, but you can't? It's a little different, but I see your point there, but. Just, well, okay, she was. wasn't completely nude. No. But what do you think is, you know, definitely just as suggestive, just as provocative, I would say. Okay.

I'll leave you. I'll let you have that one. Thank you. I feel like there is a, I feel like there's a difference of what we, the level of nudity and all that stuff. But I mostly feel it's a control issue that when you take a, any, a woman, anybody, honestly, anybody in the entertainment industry.

and they are you take them in their raw form or their innocent form and then you now we're going to make you sexual we're going to we're going to infantile you we're going to make you sexual we're going to do whatever it is to you um it's different because someone they're making you do it yeah yeah yeah they're in control of it that's right when you come in that way they don't want that okay got it so i mean like a poor little justin beber he was like a kid being sent to the fucking he did he's house like that's fucking weird that's weird I don't know I'm like looking at all this stuff because we forget that he was a kid yeah you know what I mean

when you think about it now I'm like God look you don't think don't talk about it because he's a boy but like that poor little child was like sex wise way too much as like a preteen like there's women they were like oh my god my age that were all over him and like award shows when they're like kissing they're touching him he doesn't want to be he doesn't want to be touched Isn't there one award show where some lady grabs him and kisses him? And he says, he goes, I just feel like I was violated or something.

Yeah, and if you look at his face, he's not joking. He's not joking, yeah. He's not joking. He's looking around like, who's going to stop this? Nobody's stopping this. And no one talks about it because he's a little boy. Right, right. They just think it's all innocent. But meanwhile, that woman was purving out on the guy.

It's gross. It's actually pretty gross. It's because he signed the contracts. And it's like, I guess there was his parents who were like, you know, You know, it's amazing, the poor little thing. Poor little bebes. No wonder he was on the scissor. He needs a tramp stamp of Willie Nelson on his little back.

He needs to be safe. He needs to be safe. Poor little bebes. But going back to what do you think, like what are women looking for in men down days? Because I feel like many men now are sort of emasculated. Yeah, that is true. Like a lot of men like they don't know how to change attire. They don't know how to swing an axe.

They don't know how to do it. And it seems like a lot of men seem to be okay with that. Not that men, I date. Okay. Talk to me. Yeah. What are you looking for? No, I'm giving me a lip.

No, I'm just kidding. Well, oh. I'm totally kidding. I'm totally getting. Right now, I'm, I don't disturb my peace. Because I am at that age where my peace is insanity and tranquility is above anything. It's above everything. I'm the same way. It's like, don't disrupt my flow. I don't, I'm doing just fine. I don't need drama. I don't need things to spike up. Unless it's passion,

I'll take that. But if it's, you know, stupid, meaningless energy things, like, don't, don't bring your tornado into this calm place. I can't do it. Because I do, because I do, we're Scorpio. So that's why we got to stay away from it. Because when we do get into it, we get into it. Because we're passionate. We're very passionate. So it's like we kind of have to. Right.

It can't be in the room because if I get too involved, you all get me in trouble. So it's just like, it's really, um. You got to kind of red flag stuff early when you're a Scorpio. It's all red flags. I know, man. Everything's a red flag. It's just, you see red. Everything is red.

But do you ever go because you look at the dating landscape, you look at the men out there and you go like you just said oh my god it's all red it's all red but then do you ever get reflective and go are they looking at me and are they thinking red red red when they look at me oh really i want them to i have you've heard my stand-up comedy i say i say things about myself like she'll never date anyone again like good you know what i'm like i'm like it's a deterrent so you purposely want to put up red flags i purposely say the worst things and the most outlandish things And so guys are like, ew, because, yeah, because it's like, I want, like, sometimes they squeak through and they're, like, actually spend time with me.

And they're like, oh, okay, this is kind of her, but not really. Yeah. But for the most part, I want them to be like, oh, my God, she thinks she's so great. Or, you know, like, there's a little bit of truth always to, like, the sarcastic things that I say, but not much. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's mostly like a go-to thing or whatever. But.

So, wait, you're purposely deciding to kind of. Even though you just said you had a boyfriend, it sounds like most of the time you're purposely trying to be alone. Always. Really? Always. Tell me about that. I think people that actively look for a mate are mental.

I think they're crazy. I think that's a sign of mental illness. Really? Really? I think it's sick. It's fucking weird. Really? Yeah.

Like God bless all you e-harmoning people. That's quite the statement. I feel like E-Harmony should also be sponsored by like, I don't know, Xanax or I don't know, some type of, I don't know, what do they take for codependency? I have no idea. Really? Yeah. So you think people out there actively looking for someone, it's, it's, it shouldn't do it. Really? No, it's off. Disgusting. So how does it happen for you? Like, the, like, they just come. I bet they do. I'm like, no. Yeah. Not today. Satan. But how did the, you don't. You don't. You don't. I don't have to give me details on the boyfriend you have now, but for example, just how did he squeak through? I have no idea, because I was actively like putting up like, no, no, no, no.

Yeah. He is friends with one, two of my friends. Okay. So there's that too. I don't do well meeting total strangers. So you were able to vet him. I vetted him based off of the respect that I have for my other two friends because they're very, like, I respect them a lot. They're very respectful people.

So they said he was good, good people. They didn't say anything. I don't even think they knew that we liked each other. I just know that they also know how I am. They're like, we can't introduce it too many of people because she'll be like, don't like him. But yeah, he came in. He was great. He had really great energy.

And it's one of those things we just started. I think we went on a date that same night. Wow. And then we just kept talking and then, yeah. What was he able to do to knock down your barriers, though? Like, what were his moves that the other guys couldn't do? Uh, we're very much alike. We're very much alike.

Like, basically, I am a 20. So he likes young good, too? I'm a 29-year-old boy. Hello. Um, no, he's also a Scorpio. No way, what day? Not to sound like a weird hippie chick, but he is also a Scorpio. But how did he get in?

You said you're throwing up flags. How did, how did he break through? Um, was he just a nice guy? No, he's good looking. Was that it? He's good looking. Well, I mean, that's always the first thing. I've never, I've never, I've never fought.

I have, I have dated someone for their personality once. And the fucking wears off real quick. Yeah. Yeah. It's, you get real annoyed, real fast. You get annoyed, I get annoyed fast with everyone. Anyway, like, it's a very, Are you annoyed right now?

No, no, at all. Okay. But, like, I, but. How long do I have till you get a while? I get a while. But, like, then you have, if you have someone that you're not, not, not physically attracted to right not not much you know what I mean it's tough it's tough because women guys this is what happens you really got to try all that stuff that guys do to like get your attention

the first week you got to keep it up you got to keep it up in fact this one I said I'm like okay you have you have given me a level of attention and awesomeness that I have grown accustomed to and I expect nothing less so this side now. Is that unrealistic, though? Absolutely not. How does the guy keep that up? And are you, by the way, are you reciprocating that? Oh, yeah, I'm great. You're good like that. I'm a great girlfriend. I just don't, I just don't like to date often. So you're good, that level, if he's, you're expecting a 10 from him. Yeah. Are you willing to give a 10 back? I taught him what a 10 is. Are you kidding? Wow. You are a 10. You're a 12.

Wow. So, yeah. Well, wait a minute. You're talking about looks and one of these things I hear a lot lately, which I don't know if I buy it or why you'd want to buy it. And also, the birthday is in October, it's October, not November. You know who I just gave you? I just gave you my publicist birthday, which is my first love.

So, you know what you mean? Yeah, I got a lot of beeping to do. In fact, I might have to cut out about half this. My public's first love. So it was my first love. So you can't. Todd, I love you. Todd, I love you too.

Tad. Tad. Well, it's Todd to me. Cherry picks his own names. If it weren't for Tad, I don't think I'd be sitting here right now because... Does Tad have a nice pole? He took me in. Him and his husband were like, oh, she's a mass. Because I used to... He used to adjust my publicist. And then we were friends. And then, like, you know, the early 2000s are so much... Oh, God. Gluttony going on. I would show up.

I would show up, like... messy mascara, like crying or some dumb boy or something like that. And they're like, oh, dear, come in. Sadness. I know. It's why I'm so mean now. Do you think you're mean? Are you mean by design?

Well, I think it's my nature to be mean. Keep people away? No, I think by nature I'm not a nice person. But are you mean mean, or is it an act mean? Like, is it a defensive mechanism mean or are you really a mean like person? My analog monologue is quite brief. Really? Can we hear it? Kind of my show. You'll hear a lot of it. I just let her, hi, Chico.

I love my little love. Oh, by the way, Chico's the dog. And if you just hold on maybe one or two more minutes, gang, we're going to put a beautiful French, French fry. What are they? French bulldog. We're going to put them up here. You're going to see them. And for those of you that are thinking of bailing, because I know many of you are, he's really cute. He's one of the cutest, I think, I've ever seen. He's so cute. And for those of you that probably have your finger on the stop button or pause right now, hang on, folks, just a couple of minutes. Hang on.

Because we got a Frenchie coming that's going to blow the corn chips off your freaking adult diapers. Speaking of adult diapers, I'm nervous that we should let them out. But I think it'll be okay. Don't do anything. Oh, God. What if he does it up here? Oh, God. Well, then you'll have to charge extra.

I don't know. I'm sure that's a thing. somewhere. French is shitting on desks. It's got to be like a popular. Frenchies sitting on desks. Shitting on desks. That's a thing.

Isn't anything a thing now? I feel like anything's a thing now. Yeah. Have you sold pictures of your feet? Not yet. You should try. Who would buy a picture of this man's feet? Can I get 100,000?

100,000 going once. Have you done it? 2,000. I sold a picture of two pictures, It was two pictures. I told pictures. There was one person that I just liked six of my feet. And it was during the pandemic.

And I think I did it just because I was like, okay, buddy, whatever. And I was sitting on my couch and I was like, and so I charged him for each foot. How much? Because it was, it wasn't a lot. I feel like I should charge more because I don't know. I feel like I messed up the market because I feel like the going right for feet is higher than I charged. How much? I only made a couple hundred dollars.

A hundred couple of dollars, a couple of hundred dollars a foot. But my feet weren't even manicured. They were gross. Really? They were COVID feet. Like they were just like. Wow. COVID feet are the worst.

Like corn chip toenails and fungus and. Yeah. Oh, God. Yeah. And the only thing I could do was I was taking a lot of dance lessons then. Yeah. So they were nasty. My feet were just gross.

What is it with feet? I've never, like there's a lot of wacky fetishes. I've never understood the foot thing. What the hell? does someone want with a foot? Does someone ever told you? Because I don't get it. Okay, talk to me.

First of all, y'all, if you are in a weird shit, you need to tell a bitch, like, at dinner or before it gets dinner. Because you can't just do it. You can't just do it. So wait, you're saying you can't wine and dine a girl, get her in your favor, win her affections, and then on the eighth date, you say, by the way, I'd like to you to roll a corner of cob of corn with your feet on my manhood or something yeah yeah i have had a date gun it wasn't awful and it was just awkward because then this thing happened and i was like it grabbed my foot and i was

like oh no no no because i don't like my feet like look at anything my feet don't look my feet please and um he was into said feet and i was like oh okay this is happening and i was like oh you're You can put this in your mouth? I'm like, all right, right? Wait, he put your foot in his mouth? It was in his mouth. It was in his mouth. I'm like, oh, and I was like, okay, maybe this will end quickly.

Because that's what women do. When you guys are doing something, you guys think is great. We're just like, uh-huh, maybe it's going to be over soon. Wait a minute. If you're grossed, if you're even grossed out by your own feet, and then he's putting him in his mouth and then you got to kiss that mouth. I didn't. Did you get athletes' mouth?

I just didn't. I didn't, I was like, okay. Was that it? Was it in your head to just go click? It's done. We can never speak again. Like, I was just like, how do I get out of this situation? Oh, God.

What was he doing to the foot? Was he, like, sucking on it and licking it and like a pup? And he's the weird thing. Oh. He took my foot. And he, like, held it. Here's his hand. Here's my toes.

It was like holding hands with my life. Like, romantically. Like, what? watching a movie? Romantically, yeah. I'm like, romantically. And I was like,

so what was he at the end of the couch? Where was he? I was like, what is happening? I was, after a while, I think I, I just like,

I don't know. So he interlocked his fingers through your toes and clasped your foot like you were holding hands. Did you go skipping? I guess you can't if you've only got one leg.

You can't. That's, I've been an Olympic event. though. Can you mad? They have the potato sack race. Like that would be weird. Yeah.

How long did this last where he was holding your foot? I freaked out. What'd you do? Did you kick him? The best easiest thing would be to kick him because your foot's already out. Likes my foot back. What do you do? Stop.

How long did it last? Please stop. I was sure it wasn't very long. But to me it seemed like a long time because I was like, what do I say? I didn't really. I think I was in such shock. Yeah. I was in shock.

I was in shock. I was in shock. I'm an athlete's. What happens? Like what? So when you do that clear pullback thing where he's clear leg out and go, oh, she didn't like it, what's his reaction? He's so sorry. He's like, oh, I'm so sorry.

He's like, you don't like that? I'm like, no, no. You were just blunt like that? I was freaked out. I'm like, yeah, don't do weird things to me. Okay, just in this guy's defense, and I don't know who it was, did he do something that you liked? He would know the difference. know the difference between when a woman completely stiffens them like yeah they're like a deer

on the headlights yeah I don't like it that means they don't like it that does not mean they're bracing themselves for joy that means they don't like it and you should stop or you should say is this okay what is the foot I've had the opposite or someone else has said is this okay is this okay I'm just fucking do something right it's too much right it's too much right So much. It's that weird dance you do where it's like women, and I think from my experience is women like that sort of primal side where the man's in control and just takes. But at the same time, you've got to have that balance where you've got to be respectful.

Respectful, consent is sexy, all these other things. So you've got to find that middle ground, but that's the key, I think, to a good partnership. Takes a minute. It takes a minute. But some people don't get it at all and they're probably too. two sounds like oh is it okay if i do that and then and then you just turned off because there's no too much direction am i directing here or am i a player what's happening here um but also i'm also older we didn't have consent back in the day

you just just went wild just you just hope for the best um maybe maybe the younger generation is more used to taking the time out it takes to give the consent which i think yeah i think if i think if you just met the person And consent is always great. But after a while, if you're still doing that, you're like, you should know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You better pick up on it.

What's the scoop? Because we talked about you like sexy and a man. You like good looking. Yeah. But I always hear this term these days. Oh, the women are like, I love a good dad bod. Is that just a myth? Does a woman really want a guy with a half of beer belly and like flab under his arms?

And like, is that for real? Depends who the dad is. Really? Talk to me. Well, there's a lot of factors that go into that. So I don't think anyone goes, dear Jesus, I would love a bare belly. No, no, absolutely not. Absolutely not.

I'm sure of my boyfriend's not, you know, the girl I want, I want her to have bingo arms. When she gets really excited, she flies, I don't think he wanted that, but that's what he's got. Did you say bingo arms? Oh, yeah, why is there a reason I'm wearing, I'm wearing this? What's bingo mean? I could, like, I play bingo, and they just, ah, there's, oh, an old, ladies yell bingo they flab the the flab you play bingo no i got the flab no you don't do why do you think i'm weird this well then why would you tell us not because someone out there that's got him and like

girl just play your bingo but wait you went to all the trouble of hiding it so no one would ever know and then you just said i've got this flab i've worked tanked well i were tanked up during stand-up so you can definitely see it there but i'm still got to go back to why why would you basically i'm trying to get everyone want to come see my stand-up. You are? Yeah. So it's like, this is the whole thing.

I'm going to tease them. The way we're teasing. We're teasing the dog. There's these as bingo arms. You know, they get to flapping. It's great. But dude,

does that a real enticing thing for people to come to a show to see arm flab? You never know. People are into weird things. But you just said you don't like it. Hmm. But I'm saying, I'm saying he might not like it.

I'm saying the ideal. A woman of like what, like, I don't think anyone hopes for it. No one wants, you know what I want. I want someone with a double chin. Nobody wants that. But you know what? Sometimes you fall in love with somebody and they got a double chin. And you're like, I don't like double chin, but I like her double chin.

You know what I mean? Like I really. I sure do. Hope. My guy likes my double chin because it's there. It's there. What about no chin at all? No.

You know, someone's into it. There isn't. I think the other day we were laughing because we're gross we're like so in love and we say we're just like thank God we don't do this stuff in public

but like I was like oh my God we have a six sense of humor so we're laughing about stuff and I was like there is an ass for every seat isn't there we're just little simpatico there but but you find it

you know how do you get rid of arm flab surgery I think I don't think you can there's no like no nautilus machine at the gym that gets rid of the meatloaf under your arms this is the other thing as my friend makes fun of me she's like you say you don't like all these things but then you don't work out you don't work out you don't work out thing to get rid of it and I'm like this is true as I eat I love pita chips it's like my it's pita chips and like olive toponade is my jam and it's so fucking fattening but is that him

That's your dog. Chico. I think we, should we pull him up? Should we get your headphones off and bring them up, folks. We're going to bring them up. Enough about the arm flab. This is what you've been waiting for, gang. We've been teasing this, the whole podcast.

Bring him up here and bring his bone, his giant bone. We got a French bulldog. And for those of you losers that tuned out, this is on you, not on us. We warned you. and we got a beautiful Frenchie coming up. French roll, here he comes. Here comes Chico. Put him up on the table.

Oh, get him up here. Oh, God. Oh, let's get, wow. Do this. Wow. Yes. Do you speak Spanish? I do speak Spanish.

You want me to speak Spanish? I really like your dog. He's beautiful. He's one of the most beautiful Frenches I have ever seen. Oh, look at his bone. That bone is bigger than him. He made some headway. Oh, look at him.

Oh, wow. He's done some damage to this bone. Tell us about this dog, this living pumpkin. Hi, my mom. Tell us about this dog. And folks, for those of you that tuned out, shame on you. I mean, look at this thing. There you are.

Your baby. Oh, look, and he's laying down. Are you by love? Are you by love? You know his butt holes now raiding camera three. I'm going to put this over here. Sorry, viewers at home for the butt hole. That's okay.

It's a French butthole, okay? It's a French butthole. It's very French. There's all the rage. We're going to just. Yeah, take a picture of French-McFarlane on the Harlan Highway podcast. Look, at you bringing me. You're doing great, sweetie.

Ha, ha, ha, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Oh, Reggie. It's just, I can't with him. Rensie. Frenchie. Wow. He's just the, he's the best. Like you know now people don't give, they don't care about anything we talked about.

All they care about is this now. It's all the French. It's all about the Frenchie. But did we not promise the folks? We did. We did. And I'm sure that they're much happier. Right.

They're much happier with this than my bingo arms. They're like, please don't show us those. Can you show us your bingo arms, please? Please. Oh, can you imagine getting bingo arms? I think it's, you know, I think you just get them when you're older. I don't know what happens, but there's a lot of accepting that is I'm doing with myself and my body. Wow.

Because I don't believe in age. really don't. I think that's why I don't have an age that much is just because I've just never really subscribed to it. You don't need it. That's not for you. There are things that obviously happen and I think the second I stopped acting and started doing more stand-up because not like a, I mean, they still want me. I turned down a lot of auditions just because it gives me anxiety. Yeah, auditioning is very hard. It gives me a lot of anxiety. It gives me a lot of anxiety. It puts me back and I've always had anxiety when I was. like a child and we didn't have a name for it then you were just weird but um yeah so and

you know i think i've done you know small parts and really big films and stuff like that so the competition was intense and then the lifestyle to keep that up you keep feeding it you know and you keep you do get i i've always said that uh fame and even if it's a little taste even if it's a little bit is very addicting it's very very addicting and i don't even think you realize what's happening you think you have to live up to a lifestyle and have this and have that and have this and have that and I think one of the greatest things about COVID is my whole fucking shit blew up it just like nothing I didn't like my life was just completely turned upside down wow and um it was great because I really was like I don't need this or that

and yeah I like stuff I don't say I don't like stuff I like stuff you're able to sort it out but it's not like I won't die if I don't have it I don't You know what's really important? I think I got rid of a lot of people in my life. Why, you didn't get rid of me. I got rid of me. No, didn't get rid of you. I think I was on the edge though.

No, you were never on the edge. I think I was right on the edge. You were never on the edge. Well, before we go, please tell everyone into your camera, even though French he's hogging it. Oh, my God, his butt and- Right, I told you his French asshole. Your balls are like in the camera, sir. Yeah. Oh, my goodness.

Tell the folks where they can see you, where they can see your comedy, where they can see your comedy where they can get your social media he's a camera hog he's a star you were talking about getting a taste of celebrity look at him he's already going nuts your whole business yeah in the camera there might be children in the room sit down tell them where they can find rachel sterling folks you got to go see her do stand up see you stand up well will this air before the for the 13th of december that's not for you to know oh okay that's for frenchie to know But just throw it out there. If it doesn't, I'll cut it out.

And if it does, just tell them your website and they can go to your calendar. I can't. Or whatever it is. So, Rachelsterling.orgs. That's my website. Beautiful. On Instagram, I'm ours Sterling Comedy. Yeah.

And so I leave the country. My last show in this country is December 13th, which is a Wednesday. It's called Slay. It's that picture that I sent you a long time ago, the red dress. Yeah, beautiful. It's a beautiful dress. I sent his picture because I wanted to use it to promote like a summer show I was doing. And I go, do you think guys would be into this?

And he's like, no. No, no, no, I don't. And I think it was pink. I made it pink and I had like pink palm trees. It was very like, yes, girl, Barbie summer. And you were like, it's cute for you. I'm going to say no maybe have two flyers

so I'm using that one for this it's a holiday show so it's going to have musical guests and we're going to have burlesque dancers oh cherry might have to make it the holiday sexy Santa dancers

holiday cherry so what's the date on that December 13th December 13th and then And you can go to your Instagram, your website. I'll be in Australia in Perth during things about it. Really?

Oh, man. Folks, go see Rachel. And, oh, my God, we've had such a good time. And Chico has an Instagram. Chico has an Instagram, too? He does. It's Chico's Big Adventure. Chico's Big Adventure, okay.

Don't forget Chico. Enjoy Chico's Christmas ass. And let's hit the theme music. Rachel, thank you for being here. Thank you, Chico. Great Christmas balls. And you've been on the Harland Highway podcast. Thank you so much.

And happy holidays. Thank you for having me. Thank you. Happy holidays. Yeah. And go check her out. Hilarious. And we'll see you next time. Until them, chicken chow me.

Thank you.