The Harland Highway - 984 - PISSED OFF at nature. How to kill a president. Listener phone calls.

Episode Date: March 4, 2019

PISSED OFF at nature. How to kill a president. Listener phone calls. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Well, hello, ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Harland Highway podcast. Too much? Yeah, I think a little too much. Yeah. Hey, everybody. Welcome. This is Harlem Williams. You're on the Harlan Highway rolling down, cruising, cruise control. Oh, yeah, baby. Today's show, we have got some more phone calls from people saying goodbye and, you know, making comments about the Harlan Highway. highway some good ones some bad ones we'll get into it also going to be talking about uh an aspect of the the peace talks in north korea an unusual aspect of it that uh is uh something i don't think anyone else is covered so uh check that out uh also uh going to be talking about uh something that

really pisses me off um there's a lot of stuff going on in the nate in the uh world of nature. And there's just some stuff I've got to get off my chest about the nature stuff, man. What is going on with our nature? Well, you're going to find out if you hang in there. Also, speaking of nature, I'm going to do a follow-up on a crazy news story about a man that was attacked by nature. There's a guy that was attacked by a mountain lion, and he killed it with his very own bare hands. But wait a minute, there's a new twist on the story. You're going to find out. out when we get into it. So put your helmet on, put your gerbers on. This is the Harland Highway.

What do you know my name? It's on the marriage certificate. I've never seen you before in all my life. Hold on to your airbag. You're heartless, heartless monsters. All of you through and through. You're riding down the Harland Highway. When you see a fallen stock, that means a witch has just died. You clumsy idiot? The Harland Highway.

All I want is to hear people say something again or to see people moving again. I'm Floyd Bernie, a rockabilly boy. Don't you understand? You're listening to Harlan Williams. I can't be your daughter. I'm a machine. Man, you've been dead a thousand years. By George, I think he's got it.

You're riding down the Harland Highway with High. Harland Williams. What's up, Doc? Mr. If you're going to lose, you're going to lose right now. Don't leave me here! Oh, golly. Golly, golly, golly, jolly. So, I don't know if you saw the president of the United States of America. But he recently just did his second visit to a North, not to North Korea, but he met with the North Korean leader.

Kim Jong, or however you pronounce his name. And, you know, it struck me as interesting. Whenever the president or presidents, whether it be Trump or Obama or whoever, go to these foreign lands. And even a lot of the times when they're, you know, attending a big event or a series. here on on the on homeland a lot of the times are our valued treasured leaders are great leaders of our country uh have to walk down these long ceremony lines or they meet they meet uh people at the

airport when they you know when the presidents walk down those stairs and they step off the the Air Force one jet and there's a greeting party there or they get whisked into the city and they have a big red carpet that they walk down with the leader of China or the leader of Russia or whoever they happen to be visiting and I always find it very you know kind of a looming threat that there's always soldiers there you know they'll have a whole line of like a hundred soldiers and and what's scary is they're always holding weapons right they're always they're always standing there saluting with one hand and they've got a rifle in the other hand or uh you know there's a line of cops or there's a line of there's always people

with weapons and i'm i'm thinking you know all it takes is one whackadoodle you know are those weapons loaded are they are they just for decoration are they real i have to assume if if they're soldiers they're real and some of the countries that that trump goes to or our presidents go to are not always like the friendliest or we haven't had the best history with i mean you know he just had the summit in vietnam with kim jong oh oh oh right and let's face it we went through a bloody horrible battle with Vietnam. So you've got to wonder, are there

people in the ranks? Are there people in the midst of the population that still hold a grudge that lost family members that hate the United States? You know? And how hard is it for one rogue soldiers standing in that ceremony line with the rifle

to just go, look at this. Oh my God, I got the president of the United States of America, the most powerful country on the planet, literally walking right past me. I hate his guts. The United States destroyed our country, killed hundreds, if not millions of my citizens.

And here's the most powerful leader in the world. I'll never in my lifetime have a chance to be even within two inches of the guy like this. this. Boom, here we go. Boom. Like, how is it? And if they don't have bullets in them, a lot of these rifles have bayonets on the end, like the swords on the end, how tough would it be? I mean, we've got a lot of nutty, rogue people in America. You know, look at all the shooters and the snipers and the people that go off. and we even have our share of nuts in the military

you know a lot of the people that end up going off are military people sadly and so what's to say that some soldier some rogue soldier who wants to like you know get a little payback or wants to make a point or has a cause or a religious cause or he's in a cult or he's just mentally unstable?

I don't know. But how many people get to have the president of the most powerful country in the world walk right past them within two, three, four, five feet, and they're holding a loaded weapon in their hand or any type of weapon. And I was thinking this, even outside of a weapon,

a highly skilled fighting soldier could literally burst out a line, grab the president in some kind of a neck hold and in a split second probably like snap his neck. You know, you see it in the movies where these martial arts guys will just grab a guy and just like twist their neck sideways, crunch. And they just drop dead. Well, I'm sure a highly skilled, very strong soldier

could probably grab anybody, let alone the president and wrenched their neck sideways in a matter of seconds with such force that it snapped the neck and killed the victim. And I'm not trying to give any soldiers or any demented people, any ideas, but my point is I'm saying, why do they put the president in such harm's way?

It all seems so glorious and full of praise. and, you know, ceremonial. Everyone's standing there, saluting, and, oh, my God, there's the president of the United States. In fact, I even thought, what's to stop a world leader from doing it? What's to stop Kim Jong-oh-from just, you know, in the middle of a handshake? You know, he spent three months training with some very highly skilled martial arts guys that are trained in the art of how to kill a man with your bare hands.

What's to stop Kim Jong from in a split second going from what looks like a warm, friendly handshake to suddenly he's got the president around the neck with his arms and snap? Because one, the president would be so shocked no one would see it coming. And if an assailant knew what they were doing. And by the way, don't laugh. There are forms of martial art that are trained to do this. I forget the name of it. There's a form of martial art that the Israeli army, the soldiers in Israel, are trained to do.

It's a very specialized martial art combat style that they use, which is how to train a soldier to kill someone with their bare hands. Just boom. and of course there'll be repercussions. Of course, that soldier will be brought up on charges and probably given the death sentence. Or Kim Jong-un will plunge his country into world war or whatever. But the point is, a lot of these people who kill people,

they're doing it sometimes just to make a point, to change the course of history, for a cause, they're willing to sacrifice their own freedom in order to maybe get revenge or whatever their cause is, whatever their higher so-called purpose is. Despite all the security we put around our presidents, you know, we've got these reinforced limousines that can withstand a bomb blast.

We've got bulletproof glass. We've got bulletproof clothing. We've got, you know, the president's got like 20 secret service guys around them. But let's face it, man. The president is wide open when it comes to walking down these ceremonial lines. When he's exposed to other people, it's just kind of weird. It's weird that nobody's ever done it.

You know what I mean? Nobody's either done it for political reasons or for just making a statement. So I don't know. Just food for thought, man. Mr. President, I would probably take a martial arts class and be wary, my friend. Be on the lookout for one of those, you know, stoic faces on the, on the welcome mat to suddenly turn and lunge. Um, okay, and speaking of lunging, Roger, I think for the first time we have an update on a crazy news story, right?

Yeah, normally I just do crazy news stories and that's it. But we, okay, play the music. This is weird. We have an update on a recent crazy news story. Crazy news story. That's weird. That's strange stuff. Okay.

So it's rare I do a follow-up story on a crazy news story. In fact, I don't think I've done any. But there's a new twist to one that I talked to you about just a couple of podcasts back. It was a story about a guy who was attacked by a mountain lion. in the wild and fought the mountain lion to the death and choked it to death. Here's the story. I'll replay the news clip and then I'll give you the update on the other side. Play it, Raj.

The 5-10, 150-pound man from Colorado by way of Arkansas really had no choice but to fight that mountain lion to the death. He has puncture wounds all over his body and more than 20 stitches now in his face. The most amazing thing of all is that he fought off and killed the cougar. with only one free hand. The other one was in the jaws of his attacker. It grabbed onto my hand and wrist, and from there, it started a claw at my face and neck, and that's when kind of my fear response turned into more of a fight response.

Kaufman was trail running near Fort Collins, Colorado, when he heard the big cat rustling about 10 feet behind him. He says not having earbuds in may have saved his life, Even though he made noise and tried to make himself big, which is supposed to do, the cougar attacked, and it turned into a wrestling match. With that one free hand, Kaufman tried to stab the animal in the neck, but the sticks he grabbed kept breaking. Then he was able to pick up a rock and hit the mountain line in the head. That allowed him to shift his weight and get a foot on the neck. From there, he was able to strangle the mountain lion.

And just slowly after a few minutes, I thought I'd be getting close and then it'd start thrashing again. and had a few more scratches that resulted from those thrashes at that point. And I'd say another couple of minutes later, it finally stopped moving. Wildlife officials say mountain lion encounters are getting more common as the numbers of grow and humans get out in their habitat. Fatalities are rare, but in just the last year, there have been two people killed in the Pacific Northwest by Cougars, but Kaufman refused to be the third, and now he's a bit of a legend.

Hey, everybody. Who wants to have better sex? No? Yes? Yes. The answer is yes. You always want to have better sex. That's what you want it to be better, not worse. Trust me. And Adam and Eve is offering 50% off just about any item plus free shipping. And more than that, Adam and Eve wants to make your life easy. They offer discrete shipping as your privacy is a priority. Plus 100% free shipping on your entire order. Doesn't matter how much you spend or you buy, all will be packaged and sent discreetly for free and fast. Don't wait, Better Sex is just a click away that's 50% off, one item, and free shipping. Bring more pleasure and satisfaction into your bedroom.

Just go to Adam and Eve.com and select any one item. It could be an adventurous new toy or anything you desire. Just enter the offer code Harlan to check out. check out. That's Harland, H-A-R-L-A-N-D at Adam and Eve.com. This is an exclusive offer specific to this podcast. So, be sure to use this code Harland so you get your discount and 100% free shipping. Code Harland. Have fun. Don't throw your back out. Stop. Do you know how fast you were going? I'm going to have to write you a ticket to my new movie, The Naked Gun.

Liam Nissan. Buy your tickets now. I got a free Tilly Dog. Chilly Dog, not included. The Naked Guard. Tickets on sale now. August 1st. Well, there you go, and I had talked about it, and I went on and on about how the odds of fighting off a giant mountain lion are astronomical.

I mean, if you listen to the podcast I did a few weeks ago, you heard me talking about the strength, the muscle power, the agility. I mean, these things are built to fight, to take down prey larger than themselves. And I thought it was a miracle that this guy was able to take down a mount lion and kill it and choke it to death. You know, as I said in my last podcast, their necks are really thick. And I even went on to say how I kind of wish that was my fantasy. That would be the way to prove my manhood in life is that I would be so lucky to beat off, to fight off a full-grown Mount Lion.

The odds of survival. So here's the new update. Here's the new headline for this story. And I was a little bummed about it, but here it is. Are you ready? The updated crazy news story headline is The Mountain Lion, the Colorado runner killed, was a young kitten officials say.

What the hell? So here we go. Let me read you this story. The Mountain Lion, a Colorado runner, claimed to have killed in January, was a young kitten according to wildlife officials. Travis Kaufman, 31, strangled and bludgeoned the cat to death. up in

Colorado in a park and they say the mountain line was determined to be around three to four months old and weighed 24 pounds at the time of its death I mean what the hell 24 pounds

that's like fighting a baby I mean that's like fighting a golden retriever puppy. This story just took a weird turn. This guy went from being like, the man to like, wait a minute. Kaufman told reporters earlier this month that he engaged in what was just like a wrestling match. When the lion went after, it attacked him while he was out running alone. The cat lunged at him and latched its jaw onto his right wrist.

He said he tried to protect his faces The mountain line clawed at him Eventually they both tumbled down a steep slope He tried to throw sticks at the lion But they were rotten and breaking He eventually picked up a large rock And tried to hit the cat in the head with it He was able to transition his body weight

Moving his right leg up towards his wrist And eventually was able to step on the cat's neck Suffocating it He said after the incident, he was on a crazy high and began to run toward civilization. As he ran, he said he noticed lion tracks and realized his surroundings were perfect lion territory. He ended up receiving 19 stitches along his left cheek. This is exactly where I wanted a scar from a mount lion.

Another six inches on the bridge of his nose and three stitches on his wrist where the lion's mouth was. Cothman said he had several puncture wounds from the cat's teeth and claws, but otherwise felt great as he recovered from the attack. Yeah, who wouldn't feel great after pounding the crap out of a kitten with a rock? Actually, who are we kidding, man? Even a young mountain lion is absolutely deadly. I mean, these things are wired instinctively to kill. They're wired instinctively to fight.

And, you know, there's a lot of difference between a domestic pet and a wild animal. Okay, domestic pets are fearful of man. They understand that man's their pack leader. They don't have animosity towards humans, whereas a wild mountain lion or any type of big predator, they're just wired to survive, man. They're wired to kill. So even though I'm laughing a bit that this was a kitten, a young cat, it's still, I mean, you do not want to mess with a young mount lion. And there's pictures of this guy and he has cuts and bite holes all over his body.

So the story changed. It's a little bit tamer than what we thought. But at the same time, it's still pretty dangerous. I mean, the fact that the kitten attacked them says a lot. I mean, it tells you that, you know, a young four or five-month-old mountain lion has the audacity to pounce on a human. That tells you either this cat had something wrong with it or it was super aggressive or it was fearless, but it's pretty rare that a kitten would go after a human. So there you go.

A little update on the Mountain Lion Man's crazy news story. Hello. Hello. Hi, Ireland. It's Chris from Halifax here. I know you've had a lot of people call in about the podcast, closing up shop there, buddy, but I just wanted to chime in for a minute there. First of all, I just wanted to say thank you.

It seems like not nearly enough, but it's about all we can do with this point. So thank you, sir. The hundreds of hours you have unselfishly spent to give us nearly a thousand episodes to date here. Of the Harlan Highway speaks lines about the caring person you are. We have shared many experiences through your travel stories and stories of your friends. and family and showbiz stuff and it's all been great most of all you've made us made us all laugh and that was the real reason for the podcast i think anyway and uh you have succeeded many times over with that you have me laughing so hard different times i had to pull over to the side of the road

it was just in tears and you know then you've had me in tears for other reasons when you like when you were talking about your your mom passed and then things like you that. I know of no podcaster on any other show who was shared so candidly with his audience. It takes guts to do that, buddy. I admire that.

But what would you expect from a good Canadian guy anyway, right? So this one hits hard, but we understand your reasons and will be right behind you. Supporting your endeavors always. Highland Highway will live on through all those episodes we'll be watching for you buddy and again thank you chicken shell mate so there he is chris

such a nice guy and halifax i mean i i think i've told you guys over and over and over and over how much i love everyone from halifax from the east coast from new brunswick and nova scotia Newfoundland and Prince Edward Island and even down there into Maine there, bye. Oh, bye, I love you as all. Friendliest people in Canada right there out on the East Coast. Thank you for your kind words, Chris.

My goodness. Yes, you are absolutely right. That's what it was all about. Just making people laugh and sharing and even on occasion making people cry, not on purpose. But, you know, I think there was a few podcasts.

where I actually choked up, especially the one where my mother died. And I think I played some of her final words for you guys on the podcast. So I really, really appreciate your kind words, buddy. And you totally get it. You get what the show was all about. And notice, oh, I love it how I just caught myself saying about. Because I noticed, you know, that's the Canadian guy. because Chris, you said a bout in there, too.

It's just the way we say it. Let me see if I can find your about and we'll put it up next to my about. Nearly enough, but it's about all we can do with this. Oh, there it is, the about. But it's about all we can do with this. It's about all we can do, Chris. And, yeah, but back to what I was saying before I got sidetracked by the about. Yeah, you know, it was just about making you guys laugh and have fun.

And you're right, it was a true labor of love. I just, it's, I always said the podcast was something I wanted to put out there because, you know, I traveled the world, I traveled the countries. I traveled all around doing my shows. And most of the time, you know, I did a lot of charity shows over the years, but most of the time people had to pay to come and see my shows. And I thought, you know, obviously I have a gift or an ability or a talent to make people laugh. but you know not everyone can afford to come out to a show not everybody wants to come out to a show and uh you know maybe they might not like the show because it's it's limited to an hour and it's limited to an X amount of topics and you know so i thought man maybe i can uh i can make people laugh

or entertain people uh for free just by doing like a podcast every week and uh getting the word out there So that's what it was all about sharing and giving back and hopefully, you know, adding some kind of positive levels to your life in the process. So it was a real labor of love and I appreciate it that you appreciate it and you enjoyed it. And I can't tell you how much it means to hear the sincerity in your voice and to hear you say thank you. you and just know i'm bouncing it right back uh thank you because it it won't exist if it wasn't for people like you listening and and enjoying it and uh having fun with it so you're welcome thank you you're welcome and and uh like i said uh keep your ear to the uh to the flounder because uh there'll be more to come from me i'm just just letting this puppy go to bed um

Rod, do we have any more, like, goodbye, you know, people checking in about the podcast ending? Okay, good. Let's hear another one. Holland, I hear you giving up the podcast. A little disappointing, and you said you're starting something new. Well, I hope it's not becoming a woman. I know that's popular, but don't go and chop your cleaner off. It's popular, but I don't think it's a good idea.

So if that's what you're going to do that's new, don't do it. Chicken chelmaid. Oh, man, how'd you figure it out, man? Yes, yes, that's it. I'm getting the fishing tackle chopped off and I'm becoming a woman. That's what you got it, man. No, I'm not, I'm not becoming a woman. That's not the new thing.

That's not what the changes are. The changes are, I'll let you know. Like I said, I'm going to leave this. podcast stream open and I'll be dropping things into it from time to time. You'll just be, one day you'll get a notification that I've posted something. And at that point, it'll be a surprise or it'll be the new thing I'm working on, but I will let you know. So hang in there and don't, don't jump ship just yet.

Let's do one more. I don't want to make the whole podcast about, you know, people sad that the thing the show's leaving, but I do want to give people a voice to, you know, we've been together a long time, so people are calling in, and I want to give them a voice. So we'll just do maybe a couple every show up towards as we ramp up towards the end. Roger, let's do one more, and then we'll get back to the other stuff, okay? Hey, Harland, a friend of mine informed me that you're folding up your podcast. and I just wanted to say that I'm not surprised.

You know, I think you lost a lot of listeners when you came out for Trump, and I certainly stopped listening the day after he was elected. So I just think he made a huge mistake there. Good luck. Oh, my God. You know, where do I, where do I begin? Where do I begin with this voicemail? You know, you get the good ones, and then you get ones like this that are kind of passive-aggressive and mean-spirited.

But let's break it down. As I broke it down for the people that do like the podcast, I'll break it down for this gentleman who doesn't like the podcast, who apparently doesn't listen anymore. Wink, wink, yeah. Oh, a friend told me, I don't listen anymore. A friend told me. Okay, whatever. and if you don't listen anymore, it's kind of pathetic, but it's a free world. And, you know, I'm not going to get mad at anyone.

You know, I could open up a can of whoop ass on this guy. I could do a two-hour podcast on this caller. Believe me, I would love to, but, you know, let me explain why I'm not going to because, you know, everyone on my podcast is loved. to everyone who listened, even if you bailed out, even if you got mad at me. This podcast was about loving everyone, being kind to everybody, accepting everybody. And if you love the Democrats, you like Hillary or Obama, good for you. I don't love you any less than I love anyone who likes Trump or Ronald Reagan or Jimmy Carter or Ruzador Wilson.

I don't even know. Abraham Lincoln, I don't know. So the last thing I'm going to do is end off being angry at someone on my podcast. But, you know, it's a little bit hurtful to hear that kind of talk, you know. I've said this along the way. It really is sad that people would turn off something that they enjoyed because that person likes or supports a certain political party or candidate. You know, that's like saying,

oh, I'm not going to listen to, you know, Britney Spears anymore because she likes Obama. Or I'm not going to laugh at, you know, I'm not going to laugh at Jerry Seinfeld because he likes Donald Trump. Or I'm not going to, you know, you know what I'm saying. But I'm also going to say to this guy's defense, I don't like it when comedians and actors

start spouting off about politics. So I hear you from that perspective. And there was a couple of podcasts where I got into politics. I never told anyone who to support or who to like. I just told people who I supported or who I liked. And I also basically talked about why I thought Donald Trump was going to win the election. I actually called it way before, like the minute. it he announced. I said, this guy's going to win. I knew he'd win. I bet a lot of people. People

had to pay me money and buy me dinners. I called it. And a lot of people obviously loathe and despise Donald Trump, and they loathe and despise anyone who likes them or supports them. But you got to remember, man, you know, anyone can be racist if that's how you want to call them. I could call this caller right now. I could go without any proof. for any, I could go, you know what, dude, you're a racist. Just like that, I can say it. Or I can take something somebody says and twist it around and misinterpret it and be a, and suddenly they're a racist. Or, forgetting all that stuff, you can like a politician for anything. This is America. If somebody likes Donald Trump because he has blue eyes, then they're allowed to like Donald Trump and vote for him.

They might not know anything about his politics. If someone loves Barack Obama because of his beautiful white smile, then good. They should be allowed to vote for them. They should be allowed to vote for someone because of the shirt they wear or how thick their eyebrows are. You can't condemn people for making decisions. Now, to this caller, whoever he or he supports, good for him.

I'm glad he supports. whoever they support, whatever their reasons are. Good for them. I respect it. I'm not going to fight them on it. I'm not going to tell them they're an idiot. Even if I don't like their candidate, I would never tell them that they're a fool or they're an idiot or, oh, you got it coming or whatever, you know, whatever this guy was trying to say to me. But just to set the record straight there, Mr. No-it-all, you're going to love this.

First of all, I want to, before I say this, I want to go back to, I did talk about politics maybe. If you totaled it up, okay, we're at a thousand podcasts almost, right? If you totaled up the amount of times I brought up Trump in a podcast, it was probably maybe six times, possibly 10 at the most. Okay? So out of a thousand podcasts, I brought up someone that was very topical, very controversial, very out of the boxy. He was someone worthy of talking about. And again, I never told you who to endorse or how to be or how to think. I just talked about my feelings about this particular person, this candidate.

So for you to shut everything off, something that you enjoyed, because I talked about something six to ten times out of a thousand. I just think that's a little short-sighted and narrow-minded, but I also went one step further. You know, some people started complaining that I was talking about Trump, and I heard that, and I was like, you know what? I respect my listeners. I don't want my listeners tuning in and being turned off.

I want this to be an enjoyable experience for everybody, right? And so I heard a few people talking about it, and I went, geez, that doesn't sound good. And then I confessed on my podcast. I said, you know, I used to love, watching Colbert and Jimmy Kimmel and all these late night guys, but they got so political. They were so into bashing Trump and talking about their politics that I got mad and I turned them off. I don't watch them anymore.

And I realized very quickly after about between six and ten podcasts that I was becoming that guy. And after hearing your calls, and after hearing some people not being, I went, you know what, I'm going to put my listeners first and leave the political stuff at the, the side. Even though I'm just commenting on the politics, I'm not telling anyone how to think, I don't want people having an unpleasant experience. So I put that to the side. But then this gentleman comes along and kind of, you know, in a mean-spirited, sort of bitter way, he's kind of like, well, you shouldn't have talked about Trump. Gee, no surprise your podcast is

failing. Good luck. Well, it's not, it has not. It has not. nothing to do with that. Okay? I'm stopping my podcast for the reasons I said that I've kind of exhausted it. I've done it for a long time. And I want to move on to some other greener pastures. But this is something that you might find interesting. And this is 100% true. Okay. When I did do those Trump-themed podcasts, like I said, I didn't do many. But with every podcast, I track the numbers. I can see. how many people are listening. I can even see what states. I can even see what part of the world.

If five people are listening to the podcast in Taiwan, I can see that. Okay? So here you go saying I probably lost all my listeners when I started talking about Trump those very few times. Well, here's the newsflash, and this is 100% true. My numbers on the podcast. podcast went through the roof. They more than quadrupled. I got the highest numbers I've ever had. People started tuning in like crazy. And that's not any BS.

That's 100% real. I actually had some conversations with some good friends. I said, oh my God, I did a couple of podcasts where I started talking about Donald Trump and my listenership went through the roof. And I said to my friends, I said, maybe I should be the Donald Trump podcast. guy. I mean, look at these numbers. I mean, there's something to this. I can start growing and growing and getting bigger and bigger. And before I even let those sentences dry on my lips, I said, no way. I said, hey, I don't want to be that guy. I don't want to do a political podcast. I don't want

to be talking about Donald Trump. I wanted to talk to him, you know, intermittently. I wanted to talk about them intermittently the way I do every other topic on my show, but there's no way I want to be a daily like, you know, forum for Donald Trump or any political party. That's not who I am. So in answer to your question, sir, yeah, if I wanted to raise my numbers, I could be talking about Trump every day, and I'd probably be climbing and climbing. But that's not what this podcast is. This podcast was about variety and sharing ideas and talking about different topics. And to be honest, Donald Trump was just a topic. You have to admit, he brings the passion out in people. People love him or hate him. And he was such an enigma, an anomaly in the political

landscape that I had to talk about him the same way I talked about other hot topics throughout the years on my podcast. I wasn't angling the show towards being conservative or pro-Donald Trump. I just wanted to talk about an interesting human being that was about to become the leader of the most powerful country in the world. I think you should have afforded me a little leeway to talk about him without being so close-minded and jumping down my throat and, oh, you love Donald Trump, I can't listen to you anymore. I mean, it's just, I don't know. Do what you want to do, but as I said, I corrected the issue, not just for you, but for myself.

I recognized that, you know, being too political just turns too many people off. Why do I want to alienate half of my listening audience, you know? And so to my friend who left the voicemail, I'm sorry you left. I kind of think you didn't really laugh. I've had a few people say that, oh, I'm not listening anymore, but then I always get kind of phone calls from them, and they always say, oh, a friend told me, or somehow I heard, but I think you're still listening. I hope you are. I hope you can shut off your political bias and just enjoy what I'm doing for you. But maybe you can't. And like I said, I'm not

going to be bitter at you. I think there's too much bitterness. And, you know, the tone of your voicemail was kind of mean-spirited, you know? And it's like, I've done years. and years and years of this, you know, to kind of put a smile on your face. And then at the end of it, you kind of drop that little, you know, mean-spirited voicemail on me. And it's like, dude, if that's the way you want to be, you're just feeding into all the anger in the world and in this country. But I'm not going there, bro. I love you just as much as I love every other caller.

And everyone that's ever listened to my show or called in, I love you to the max. I don't care what your religion, your political beliefs, your gender, your sexual preference. I don't care any of it, man. You're all loved here on the Harland Highway. So there you go, buddy. I hope that gives you some perspective on your voicemail and that, you know, I could have done way better numbers had I decided to be a full-on pro-Trump. podcast. Believe me, I was astonished. I was like, what the hell's happening? And then I looked and I realized, oh my God, my numbers are going through the roof because I'm talking about Donald

Trump. But did I go for it? Did I get sucked in by the greed and the number and the numbers and the opportunity and the trends? Nope. I went the exact opposite way and I shut it down, brother. So I hope you'll give me some kudos for that, my friend. You know, I tried to make it a safe, a comfortable place for you where you didn't have to, you know, go away and shut me off. But maybe you're just so perturbed that I even like or voted for Donald Trump, that that's enough for you to just, you know, I don't care what that guy does. He's, I can't like him.

He doesn't agree with me. Screw him. I'm shutting them out. I don't know. It sounds like you might have done that, but again, I never believe that my friend told me. So there you go. I'm not going to be mad. Godspeed. And, you know, for what it's worth,

thank you for the time that you did put in and listen. And I hope I brought something to your life that didn't make you angry or upset and made you smile and made you laugh and brought a little joy in your life. Since you left my podcast, I hope you leave with a good feeling in your heart and not bitterness or angreness, okay?

There you go. So, this stuff, it's such an interesting time we live in, man. Very interesting times. But I won't go into that. Let's just move on. Love everybody. And let's shut the phone line down.

for now, Raj, and we'll listen to some more another time, but let's get back into the podcast, shall we? Don't piss me off. This is Harland Williams. And you're really pissing me off. You're starting to piss me off, you little pigly son, bitch. You pissed me off.

Shut up, you're pissing me off. These fucking assholes, this fuck, these fucking assholes, the fuck is their problem, man. Oh, yeah. This is probably a good time for this segment, Roger, because I, you know, I did get a little fired up with our last phone message, but, uh, this isn't about, uh, this isn't about, uh, that. This is about something that really piss me. As you know, I'm a nature lover, right? I love me some nature. I love the outdoors.

I like the critters. like the animals. And, you know, as you know, as humans become more and more in terms of population, you know, I think we're up over seven and a half billion and climbing. And as we need more and more area to house the humans and raise agriculture for the humans, you know, we're encroaching more and more and more on wild lands. and this includes North America, Africa, India, China, all over the world, man. We're stripping forests, we're clearing planes, we're mining mountains, we're draining lakes, where, you know, who knows what we're doing, right?

And so I'm a nature show guy. I love watching the nature shows, and when I've started to notice in the last few years, and it just kind of popped into my head the other day when I was watching a nature show, show, and I started to go, wow, this is becoming more and more prevalent in the nature show. So, you used to watch a nature show, and you'd see a lion out in the middle of the jungle, or you'd see an eagle up in the sky, or you'd see a deer out in the wilderness, or a giraffe out on the plains of Africa, or a rhino.

You know, everything was out in the wild, right? It was like, man, I'd like to go to that place one day, and, wow, look at those wild animals. I've never seen that before. But lately, in the last few years, I've been watching nature shows. And it's like, you know, and the lion stalks towards the unsuspecting zebra. He crouches in the golden grass

and gets ever so close before making the kill. And so here I'm watching this lion, crouching through the grass, stalking a zebra, and as they move in on the lion, I'm like, wait a second. There's like a, there's a necklace around that lion. And sure enough, there's a big leather necklace with a radio transmitter on it.

And like, what, really? Like out of all the, is that how few lions we have left? The pickings are that slim that you're going to follow a tagged lion? And I'm going to see a wild lion tracking a giraffe through the wilderness with a man-made leather necklace on? With a radio antenna sticking out of it? What the hell am I watching? Is that a robot?

Is it a lion that went to the fashion mall and got a turtleneck sweater? What the, I mean, talk about taking you out of it. You know, you can't film wild animals and they've got, they're wearing things that humans made for them. What's next? A cheetah with Nike's? And there goes the cheetah running through the grass at 60 miles an hour. And it looks like he's just abandoned his sponsorship with Reebok and he's sporting brand new Nike Yeezys. Or whatever the hell they're called. I mean,

good Lord. It's just like, it made me sad. And then I saw another, another nature show where I'm seeing the endangered black rhino there's only 17 left on the planet and here's this beautiful rhino and just out of focus in the background you know he's walking through a field and way in the background i can see like high rises sticking up and here comes some drafts and there's some apartment buildings way in the background i'm like what the they couldn't find a a piece of a real estate where there there isn't any uh signs of humankind what the hell's happening and then i just watched a brand new one just the other night i watched a i watched a special where uh that they found the rare tigers of india there's only 700 tigers left in india and i'm watching i'm going oh this

will be good and like you know out of the the 15 minutes of footage 11 of it is is wild Tigers walking down a dirt road with tire treadmarks all over it. And I'm like, boy, boy, those tigers sure put in a hard day in the bush walking right down the middle of the dirt road. Hopefully they don't have to get out of the way when the traffic comes by. I mean, aren't tigers supposed to be one of the most elusive, endangered creatures on the planet? It's like God shone a light on you if you ever saw one. And here they are sauntering down the dirt road in between the Land Rover tracks

and the Humvee tracks. Whoops, a kitty just stepped in an oil spill. Whoops, a daisy. I mean, it's just sad, dude. And there's the jungle on either side. But, you know, the tigers are like, screw the jungle. Well, I'm going to step on thorns. I might get stung by a hornet. I'll just take this road that goes into Bangladesh.

How about that? Maybe I'll make my way into Bollywood and get in the movies. Some la la la la la la, tiger cat, tiger cat, chumla la la la la. You know, I don't know what the... What the hell, man? And then I swear to God, just earlier today. This is what triggered it, man. I'm like, enough.

I'm watching a National Geographic special, right? On the Grand Canyon, the National Geographic Grand Canyon. The Grand Canyon has seen the return of one of the rarest birds in North America. They are the bird with the largest wingspan of any bird in North America. The California Condor. And I see this giant, majestic bird that was on the bridge edge of extinction. There was only like 53 of them left, and they captured them all, and they put them in incubators, and they brought them back.

Now there's something like, you know, I don't know, 600 or something. And there's this beautiful bird, and it kind of flies up on the cliff and starts going towards its nest, and I'm like, what the hell is that? And right there on its wings, it's got huge numbers on each wing. 57, it says. And I'm like, what the hell? And to break sure we know which bird is which, they've actually painted numbers on each of the specimens

so that conservationists and naturalists can know exactly what they're looking at. And I'm like, what the hell? Why don't you just put the Delta logo on the back, or American Airlines, or Hawaiian Airlines, or Aer Lingus, something? I mean, why don't we just start sponsoring wildlife, right? Oh, and here comes the jet blue California condor in for a landing, and what a beautiful landing free television and snack served in the comfort of your seat. I mean, we're going to start seeing wild birds flying around with numbers painted,

and they weren't small numbers. This was like a big, I thought the thing was wearing a football jersey, man. I thought I was watching Tom Brady land on the edge of a cliff. If go long, go long. I mean, what the hell is happening, man? This is just not a good sign. Because nature photographers, man, they do get off the beaten track. They get out there, right?

And then I watched this other, you know, the BBC put out a beautiful nature. These are the most elusive animals in all of Africa, the wild, dogs. There's only 43 wild packs left of the wild dogs, rarely seen. And I'm like, oh, wow, so I watched this hour-long documentary on the wild dogs of Africa, right? Incredible predators, very intricate pack society, violent, rugged, very skilled hunters. And they go on and on about how there's so few left and they're hard to track and everything. And then at the end of the show, they decide to show like a little four-minute the making of the wild dogs

of Africa. And I'm like, okay, this will be good. So then they show it, and it's like, here's these guys sitting around on Land Rover's, like, you know, big Land Rover jeeps, filming these dogs, these wild dogs.

There's like four jeeps around them, and the dogs are just laying right beside them. They've lost all fear of humans, so much for the elusive, hard-to-find, wild dogs, and they're literally just laying there. Some of the humans are even off the truck standing on the ground, like 20 feet away, filming them. And the dogs are just laying there like, like, I'm at a dog park, and it's too hot,

and the dogs don't want to play anymore. They're just laying on the ground, panting and looking around and sleeping. I'm like, oh, boy, these guys are real wild and scary. Yikes! I mean, there's Larry standing over there in his Tommy Bahama shorts. How scary are these wild dogs? I mean, how much more easier can pray be when it's wearing Tommy Bahamas? That's got to be easier than taking down a wild zebra, doesn't it?

But no, these wild dogs are real wild. They're laying there, just snoozing, paws up in the air. looking around la-de-da-la-la-la-la hey look at this guys we got our own special finally you know everyone on netflix is getting a special it's about time we got one we're wild dogs woo-hoo oh man it's just it's just a sad state of affairs it's sad on so many levels it's sad that we're at a point in human history and the evolution of this planet that we have to interfere with animals and tag them and number them and monitor them and count their numbers and there's so few left. We've destroyed them. We've obliterated them. We've ruined their

habitat. We've killed their hunting grounds. They're all on the brink of disappearing. And our solution is to, you know, fit them with numbers and collars and apparatus and what kind of wild, Why don't we just go look at them in a zoo, man? Can we even use the word wild anymore? How about just, yeah, there's a lion out there in somebody's backyard. It used to be the wild years ago, and, you know, there was actually land, and there was actually a lot of lions. But now it's just, you know, they're in somebody's backyard.

I mean, it's just sad on that level. and then it's just sad that we're, you know, everything's just like shrinking and dying and we're moving in on them. And it's like, how much longer do they have? Just tragic. And on the theme of this, you know, a number of years back, I talked very strongly about a podcast that I did. you'd have to go back through the archives, but I talked about and I went on a little mission for a while.

There was a movie that came out years ago called Sharkwater. And if you can find it on Netflix or HBO or Apple TV or Amazon Prime, I don't know where it is, but if you want to see a really illuminating and sad and important documentary Sharkwater, is a fantastic documentary about the plight of sharks, all the sharks in the world in all the oceans of the world, and how they are being eradicated and destroyed and harvested for human consumption. Get your head around this number, okay? Have you ever, try and think of a hundred million of something.

Imagine trying to count a hundred million pennies. Imagine going and sitting on the edge of the, the highway and counting a hundred million cars or or uh you know going into a field and counting a hundred million blades of grass okay so when you see shark water you are going to be sick to your stomach they are killing over a hundred million sharks a year a hundred million sharks a year are being taken from the ecosystem top predators that pretty much police the balance of the of the you know the ecosystem in the ocean and what's really great about this shark water documentary is it talks about not only the harvesting of these sharks and the

complete cruelty of it and the obliteration of these sharks but it talks about how them being the apex predators of the ocean when they go then of course other species will start to become overabundant and this will throw off the balance of everything in the ocean and the droppings and the bacteria and and and the oxygen levels in the ocean and the choking of the plants that create the oxygen in the ocean and blah blah right down the line to where when the sharks go the ocean goes and when the ocean goes humans go and nobody gives a flying fuck you know they really don't nobody care oh the sharks are being killed a hundred million okay well okay and oh it's just so we're we are sad and pathetic us humans we really are we walk around in our

nice clothes and our nice cars and our fancy cell phones and we give to charities and we help our neighbors and we do all these wonderful things but it's all a big illusion you know if you If you destroy nature, if you cut it down so it can't recover, all the fancy good deeds you do and all the money you make and all the nice little things you do for the community, they don't mean Jack. There is no community. There are no nice things if we don't have an ecosystem that includes all the other animals that play an important role in this universe, in this planet we live on. so check out shark water and the reason i brought it up is because they just did a sequel to it it just came out this weekend and i went to see it and it's it's you know it's just grim it's hard to watch these documentaries but i i you have to recommend them to everybody because

they're very important and you need to illuminate people and you need to inform people and and we need to stop this crap man it's it's it's it's you know, you can only sit back and look at it and go, ah, that's somebody else's problem, or that doesn't affect me, you know? It was funny, the person I went to the movie with said exactly that. I said, what do you think? And they're like, that doesn't affect me.

What do I care? What do I care if a bunch of sharks die? And I was just like, oh, boy, wow. And that's the mentality of most people, you know? And here I am inside. like painting me. It's like I want to cry. I'm hurting inside. When I see the sharks getting slaughtered, I, I just, it, it affects me. It's like, it's like little knives going into me. And when I did my last podcast about years ago, I started this whole campaign and I asked

everybody not to buy shark fin soup. And I, I started sending letters to Chinese restaurants. I started looking up restaurants that serves shark fin soup and I ask people to, you know, donate to the Sharkwater Foundation and blah. But I'll let you decide. I hope you can watch it and realize, wow, there's something there that needs to be addressed. So check it out. It's called Sharkwater. And so, yeah, this was my little pissed off segment because I'm pissed off about, you know,

our dwindling wildlife. I'm pissed off that we have to enjoy it now And it's got man's fingerprints all over it It's not as wild as it used to be And kudos to the people that are trying to save the wildlife With the transmitters and the numbers And that's all important But what does it say about us that that's where we're at

In order to see wild animals We've got to see them with human fingerprints all over them It's just sad Oh, weird. This podcast, you know, an interesting podcast. This one didn't have a, I just realized it wasn't loaded with comedy. It was more like, more like talking points today. But, you know, that's, again, that goes back to what I was saying to the gentleman earlier about my podcast. It just, you never know where it was going to go. And sometimes you do hit hot topics that I like to discuss. And that was part of the whole journey of the Harland Highway. So again, I hope you got something out of it today. And again, I want to stress you're all loved. Even the guy that gave me a hard time.

I love you, buddy. Not a shame to say it. I'm glad you were along for the ride for whatever amount of time you were around. And that's it. We're going to leave it there, everybody. Let's see, am I doing any stand-up comedy gigs? Yeah, come to my stand-up comedy gig, and I'll do this. I'll just ramble on about wildlife and Donald Trump and, yeah, no, I won't.

Looks like I'll be in San Diego, everybody, March 14th, 14, 15, 16th, San Diego, California at a place called the American Comedy Co, right downtown, beautiful comedy club. very intimate, please come down and enjoy the show. And then the following weekend, I'll be over in Hartford, Connecticut area. There's a casino called the Mohegan Sun. It's nestled in the hills. That's why I say area. It's kind of outside of Hartford, and it's out in the woods.

It's a beautiful Indian casino. And it's called the Mohegan Sun, and the Comedy Club inside is called Comics with an X. C-O-M-I-X comics. and come on out and catch the show. I think you'll really like it. So all my comedy dates are posted on my website, harlemwilms.com. Please go.

Get your tickets in advance and enjoy the show. So that's it for today. You can write me at harlwilms.com as well. There's also a phone number there if you want to get any last comments in before we shut her down in a few months. uh you can leave me a voicemail still uh that's it for today thank you for being here and i mean that to everybody you know who i'm talking about and until next time chicken chowman baby so i just think you made a huge mistake there good luck