The Headgum Podcast - 128: Geoff Endorses Oz

Episode Date: November 11, 2022

Marika, Johnny, and Joel join Geoff in the New York studio to discuss small bladders, Geoff's funeral, and the Pennsylvania governor race. Plus, they play a round of Geoffardy: New York City edition! The Pit Wall has been greenlit! Subscribe on your favorite podcast app so you don't miss new episodes dropping every Wednesday after a race. Advertise on The Headgum Podcast via Gumball.fm Rate The Headgum Podcast 5-stars on Apple Podcasts. Rate The Headgum Podcast 5-stars on Spotify. Join the Headgum DiscordSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a HeadGum Original. Previously on the HeadGum Podcast. Skillet sauce with a citrus soy salmon. And you make the salmon in the stove. Salmon in the stove or on the stove? Salmon on the stove with the skin. In the range, the fucking sauce. The salmon's in the oven and then you're glazing it every five to ten minutes with the sauce on the stove.

With the citrus scoy salmon, with the scallions. On the skin? The salmon has skin on. Sauce on the skin. I'm fucking down. Skin side down. On parchment paper. On sarchment saper.

On saran wrap. Melted plastic. Also not good for you. Archman Saper. On Saran Wrap. Right? Melted plastic. Also not good for you. I mean, I feel at home at this point. I'm so glad. What was that? I was just saying I'm happy that you feel at home here. And you're mad at that?

She's agreeing with you. I'm ambivalent. You're outwardly upset. I'm valid to have any emotion I have. Everybody's emotional experience is valid. But mine, my gladness isn't. You're experiencing October gladness.

I really do feel at home. I don't know what else to say. I mean, this is the third record in the studio. Yeah. I don't even know if we've recorded in LA this much. It's your second day and you feel at home? Joel? I think you feel at home too.

Yeah, I just feel like everybody's coming at me. Oh. It's literally quite the opposite. What did you say? You said that you were pissed that I'm here? No. That's the exact opposite. That's how quite the opposite. What did you say? You said that you were pissed that I'm here? No. That's how it landed on my ears. I said, I'm so glad you feel that way.

And it was genuine. It was genuine. Nice. I appreciate that. This studio is my favorite color. This particular green or just green in general? This particular green. It is a really nice green.

What adjective would you put before it to describe it? British racing green. Aston Martin. Yeah. Really nice green. Yeah. It's like a forest, I'd say. Johnny, your shirt matches. Yeah. Yeah. Really nice green. Yeah. It's like a forest, I'd say. Johnny, your shirt matches.

Yeah. Yeah. Got this in a Orlando gift shop. Nice. Yeah. Very golf-esque. I feel like we gotta start this over. Did you...

I'm gonna keep all this in, but the energy is sour. Live sour. Live sour. Don't live strong. Okay. I guess that'm one of those bracelets yeah I mean didn't everyone yeah but I like

was one of those people who wore it for too long big gloves would come in I feel like every episode there's like a dunce you know what I mean like and it changes every time for sure.

So this is how you want to start the episode. Well, I'm just saying, who do we think the dunce is going to be? I mean, we could place our bets and then by the end we can come back and be like, actually, I think it was Joel. I think it's going to be you. Why? I feel like everyone was going to say that. And so for you to say it so fast confirms my deepest fears. Oh, it's just for today.

This one episode. Every episode the comments are Oh Jeff made me have a stroke today. At some point we really should read the comments. We could read the comments of today's episode. Which when they're listening to this was three weeks ago. Yeah we could.

The stroke one was from today. I don't know what else to say Joel. I'm upping listening to this was three weeks ago. Yeah, we could. The stroke one was from today. I don't know what else to say, Joel. I'm upping therapy to twice a week. You just comment back condolences. Yeah, it's become sort of a bit to really just rag on both the podcast, but particularly you, which I will say one comment today got me i have to find it it was a time stamp comment and it said the part at 45 57 made my fucking year and i clicked on it end of the podcast and i teed um we did a long bit in HQ

about what would happen if I died and my funeral became the final episode of the show should I pull that up? I think that was everybody chimed in with a funny like line

one of the moments I felt most like this company was a community that I've joined. Like we all do things together. Right. And it's not that people were like sharing any condolences. It was like more a celebration, but not a celebration of the life having passed, but life having been ended.

And Emma just chuckled like she was listening to a preacher. Amen. What was the... Oh, I remember. Okay. listening to a preacher amen what was the oh I remember okay do you want to just read the entire transcript I want people to feel how long this went on

so the basic concept is that it started with playing a rendition of the HeadGum podcast theme at your funeral Micah said it's missing a sheition of the HeadGum Podcast theme at your funeral. Micah said, it's missing a she at the end. Good so far. Brad, that was easy listening. And then you said, if I die young, it would work wonders for the HeadGum Pods numbers.

Episode 189, Jeff's actual funeral, which is like pretty soon. That's in a year. You didn't give yourself much time. Dibs on running the soundboard for the eulogy. Wow. Amir said, oh, oh, shit. Oh, shit. Kayla said, who will sing Amazing Grace?

Heartfelt eulogy from Jeff's father. Daddy chill. Oh shit, oh shit. Yeah. Daddy chill. Congregation in tears. She. Riley said, somber.

Amazing Grace. Oh she, the sound. Casket lowers down. That was easy. Paw bearers enter to the too long game show sound. Ryan Gall bearers was a punch up of that from Brad. This is less funny than I remember. In the moment, it was really fun.

Yeah. It's probably because I'm reading it in full. You did say your funeral would be open casket slash legs. I'm trying to find anything that had a lot of reactions on Slack. I said that your wake board or otherwise is just an excuse for Jake to go surfing. Riley said crowd surfing. He'll take what he can get. And I said, crowd?

Sorry, what do you mean? There won't be anyone there. And then I said the hearse is called the wagon. And that's it. That's pretty good. That's it. That's pretty good. My Bond of the Week is Nomi Frye. Is she in the Charlie Sanchels movie?

No, she's like a writer for The New Yorker. Oh, yeah. A cultural icon. Well, not really, obviously, because I couldn't remember who she was was I do know who you're talking about now though I really want to have her on the show she follows me on Instagram and Twitter so I think we can make it happen I don't think she listens to the show though

I mean she shouldn't it's almost better that she doesn't agreed I think if she listened she wouldn't come on yeah and she wouldn't respect you probably she comes on the show oh yeah I followed you on a dare i was out with marika micah that'd be so sad um but we talked about getting a guest for this episode or one of them

and i and today realized i should have invited her on yeah that's fair yeah we should get some more podcast guests on and really just I do want to have Hayes and Sean on from Hollywood Handbook. That would be fun. You should go on Hollywood Handbook. I love that show. We're going to get Miles. Miles, yeah. I was trying to get Miles on in August.

Now he's a Headcumbe podcaster so it's even better. You guys have a segment planned for later, we should say. And I feel like you guys are just like yeah get all this shit out of the way until we get to our segment Joel you haven't said anything my bond of the week is gonna be Dave Bird

Lil Dicky it's time for a curly haired bond David Blaine we need an illusionist as a bond just besting villains through sleight of hand. Exactly. Close-up magic.

The escapist. Feeding the world from bondage. It's the ball torture scene we talked about last week. But on the first hit, he disappears into death. That's just like... To round out the Davids,

I guess I'll go writer for The Atlantic, David Sims, host of the Blank Check podcast. That's good. We could get David Attenborough. He's British, right? Yeah.

Yeah. That would be good. David Sedaris. We need a cool-outed Bond. Yeah. David Sedakis. Who's that? Plumber in Burlington.

Local references. I love it. David Sedakis. local references I love it David Sudeikis yeah I thought you were speaking Jason's name I know I totally was I was like wait a second Dave Sudeikis rolls off the tongue though

Dave Sudeikis it only rolls off the tongue because it's a two syllable name and then Sudeikis, which Jason also is. Yeah, day to day. Per Vox, Pete Buttigieg knows EV range anxiety is a thing. What's EV range anxiety? Electric vehicle range anxiety. Got it.

He knows it's a thing. You know it's a thing? I didn't know it's a thing. What's he going to do about it? Nothing. He just knows it's real. He knows that if know. What's he going to do about it? Nothing. He just knows it's real. He knows that if you have an EV, you're probably a little nervous

that you won't get to the next charge port. Is he pro or anti-EV? He's neutral on it. It doesn't ultimately matter. Older space to take, I think. Probably. Choose a side, Pete. I think the reason he didn't end up being on the ticket

in 2020 was that he didn't have that bootage edge to him. You know, Biden sort of has the aviators. He has the veneers. He has the cream. The cream. The ice cream edge. He sort of looks like he was like right for the part of Top Gun, but like 40 years too early ahead of his time in that specific regard,

that flight jacket quality. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I would hate to see Buttigieg coming out of Air Force One. In a pair of Air Force Ones. What are you trying to do?

Yeah. The EV thing is how I feel about peeing on road trips. Anxiety or that you don't think you'll make it to the next truck stop? I don't think I'll make it to the next stop. You guys never did like road trip diapers? Road trip diapers? Yeah, they sell like adult diapers. Okay, speak on this.

I said my piece. I know we'll never get normalized. Answer the question. Because, yeah, it's like what if you don't Peeing in a bottle that's weird as shit too Okay I've never had an emergency on a road trip And you don't even just mean with the bathroom

Every trip you've taken cross country Otherwise has gone smoothly Yeah Yeah I think the worst thing that's happened is like a car spun on ice but it was pretty it was pretty that is kind of an emergency that's pretty bad it's not a small thing it the all-wheel drive kicked in and it was fine yeah abs abs that's what i was thinking so kind of swerved a little bit or spun because spinning is really bad it's

fun once well you were also doing like a style swerved a little bit or spun? Because spinning is really bad. It spun once. Well, you were also doing like a style swerve. I think you were wearing a Jesus piece on your way to Tucson. She said so many words. The ABS gave me IBS. Sort of ruined the rest of the trip. I was on my way to visit Cornell Potential School. Yeah.

It's called Carswerved. Not quite an Ivy League-er. Well, it is an Ivy League school. No, but you didn't get in. I did get in. I just didn't go. It's the only Ivy League that I got into. That's actually really cool. You went to a better school.

Yeah. It's just not in the league. You didn't go to any Ivy League school. You can It's just not in the league. Yeah. You didn't go to that. You didn't go to any Ivy League school. I can't speak on this. Well you know we can talk about it. I'm not speaking on it.

I'm surrounding it circling it. So did you wish you could have gone to an Ivy League. No I actually went to the hardest professional school to get into in

the country. That one wasn't even funny. That was just me being an asshole. Grace cut that out. I want to start making plans for the 6th. What are you guys doing? Are you going down to D.C.? For the 6th? January.

November. Which isn't... Is that election day or is it date? I don't know. Primary elections? No, Johnny, it's November. It's November when this comes out. Oh, okay. And also it's past August.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, totally. I'll probably be home and not in Washington, D.C. for the 6th if you catch my drift. If you catch her 6th.

Anywho. You asked. What are you guys doing? I got some buddies in D.C. because that's where I went to school. Georgetown. Yeah, so some of them were trying to plan some stuff and we got some buddies in D.C. because that's where I went to school. Georgetown. Yeah. So some of them

were trying to plan some stuff. We'll see what comes together. Yeah. Plan some stuff. What do you mean? Kicked off the first app we were using to message each other

and plan it. Okay. Yeah. Telegram. Yeah. Yeah. Got banned. Wicker.

Wicker. So we're trying to find a new platform. Yeah. See what happens. Truth Social. I think the DMs are. Right.

Yeah. It's a good idea. Check that out. I did see a headline that said only 6% of adults in the US are on Truth Social. Kind of a lot. Yeah. Kind of a lot for a very deep, dark web service.

Apparently, Trump isn't really a big fan of Truth Social. Because there's not Truth Social spaces. He wanted fleets. Truth Social reels. Just checking in on time. We've got four minutes to kill. What do you guys want to talk about? I never give you guys the floor, and I really am sorry about that.

Joel, how are you doing? I'm doing great. Like, really, though. How are you doing? am sorry about that. Joel, how are you doing? I'm doing great. Like, really, though. How are you doing? Still great. No, really. How are you doing? So, you only accept the landscape?

Yeah, I'm looking to dig deep and get somewhere, like, really dark for you. Yeah. Yeah. What's your, like, biggest insecurity about your body? Just real quick. Honestly, I'd stick with the... The peeing thing

comes up a lot more than you'd think your small bladder I have a really small bladder and I drink a lot of water so that's good no

cause it's like look I'm there with you brother on the drink a lot of water or the small bladder both well I don't drink a lot of water but I have a very small bladder

yeah constantly dehydrated yeah just dehydrated but I feel like saying you have a small bladder is like oh I'm so skinny no it's not really i don't think so because you're because if you have big organs you won't get that like thin paper are you like more attracted to me now that i've said that i have a small bladder kind of like looking right

underneath this little microphone nook are you equating skinniness with attractiveness i'm not i'm not. I'm not. I'm just saying it's a vibe. You're saying that it's a vibe? Yeah, you know those like lanky fuckers on the subway with the, you know,

the fucking scoop neck tees and the, you know, the book. That's a look. Yeah, it's a look. That's a look. It's a look. Yeah. And it's lucrative.

I tried to model and they said that I was too big boned, as they put it. Did you try the bladder thing on them? My bladder is fucking huge. I haven't peed in a year. I'm a cactus. Do you think it's genetic, your bladder?

Does your dad use the bathroom a lot? Neither of my parents drink a lot of water. Okay. Do they drink a lot of coffee? No Okay Yeah And then are you circumcised? And then if so, how far down does it go?

Yes and the normal amount Wow Mariko, what's on your mind? I'm just thinking about bladders I'm glad that's what you're thinking about yeah I sometimes don't pee for an entire work day

that's fine listen don't let these small bladder dying pieces make us feel bad about never peeing yeah but then if I'm asleep, sometimes I'll wake up once, twice in the middle of the night

and go to the bathroom. So I don't get it. Doesn't make sense to me. The only time that you have to pee is the time you really don't want to. Yeah. Yeah. That's why, again, I think we should normalize sleep diapers. I'm kind of about that. I won't do that. I also wake up

3 a.m., I gotta go pee. Yeah. And that's a product of the small bladder. I would like that sounds torturous to just be laying there with a wet. I don't think I'd be able to do it

because I pee anxiety when I'm alone. That's why you never pee. I'm so nervous what if it doesn't come out right it's a valid concern Patrick have you ever peed crazy yeah definitely for sure

peed crazy what does that mean to you I don't know there was a time when I was really drunk in college that I thought the floor of my bedroom was a urinal. And I don't just mean that I like peed standing up in my room, which is what happened, but it was that I like in my head had a memory

of standing in front of a urinal that wasn't there. I think I was like, it was sleep paralysis. It's a false memory. Yeah. It was a core memory. One of the touchstones of my life. Yeah. There's the live show at Gramercy and that.

Have you guys ever been mistreated in a relationship? I don't think so. That's great. Joel? I don't think so either. This is amazing. Brownlee? And if it's not overwhelmingly

positive, then Johnny will ask how you're really feeling. Yeah. I feel like probably had some like bad friendship moments when I felt I was mistreated. You know what I mean?

Is it when I forgot to record the HeadGum podcast like four weeks in a row last year? No, that's not you mistreating me. That's me mistreating commerce. I'm sorry, Manscaped. Yeah, that's an interesting point. I've been mistreated in a relationship. Okay.

So you were fishing. I guess none of us in a relationship. Okay. So you were fishing? Yeah. I guess none of us did ask him. Yeah. You want to get into it? No. You just said, let's get into it. It's a goof.

It's like, you know, we put on a character for these things, right? It's like, this isn't really how we are when we hang out. Kind of. I hate to say it. Wow. Kind of I hate to say it Wow Now you know who your real friends are Tom York style No Radiohead fans in the room

I'm not even a fan But I knew that song Should we sing the little ditty that we came up with last night? Yeah we should 1, 2, 3 That Jeff is toxic We'll be right back No, we should. Oh, please. One, two, three. That Jeff is toxic. We'll be right back.

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and five free AG1 travel packs with your first purchase exclusively at drinkag1.com slash what's that? Again, that's drinkag1.com slash what's that? Check it out. We should say that that was in reference to the fact that Emma and Marika had not even soup, just bone broth for lunch, which, yeah, that's not enough. And I had a rice and chicken bowl. Okay.

With a side of broth. I was just worried about you guys. Very exciting. I appreciate that. Johnny and Joel prepared a segment. And Marika. And me. You were a part of this?

Marika was also a big part of this. I don't know what it is. Okay. Clearly. I'm a little nervous about it. Look, Jeff, this quarter, Q4 2022, is a very, very big quarter financially for HeadGum.

I spoke with Ryan. For the listener, this is our new VP of sales. We're talking about monetization strategies and how to bolster up branded content to sponsorships in general. And just looking at the finances and what's coming in,

what's coming out, we realized, oh, this show is kind of in the red with all the production costs. And I think we need to do just a few more ads that are baked in

within this episode. They paid top dollar to do it. Why? And also we're very excited to work with you specifically, actually. There's no way. It's true. These brands wanted to work with me specifically? Yes. What are the brands?

We'll get to it. They're super excited to work with you. We have the ad copy and we want you to read it right now. Okay. It's hard because sometimes I don't like to do a cold read. Yeah. I mean, we'll have it in our hands and we'll be reading read it right now. Okay. It's hard because sometimes I don't like to do a cold read. Yeah. I mean, we'll have it in our hands

and we'll be reading along. So if you do need to do another take. Okay. Can I read? Yeah, if you have trouble, like if you need to answer some questions. No, let's stumble on something. You can just repeat it.

Okay. And we can just get a clean. Yeah, we can get a clean in. All right. You'll want to go one at a time on those. Okay, so give space in between each line. Yeah, we can get a clean in. All right. Yeah, you'll want to go one at a time on those. Okay, so give space in between each line? No, like between each page. Okay, I got that.

We'll take a break after each one. Nobody wants to read three ads right after. We'll take a break. I will say it's kind of crazy that everyone knew about this and you're bringing this to me during a record. You could have said, hey, we're going to do some ad copy before this. I mean, you could have told us about every segment

on the show ever. Goals, goals. That hit me. It came out of nowhere. I almost did Joel's goals again. Maybe we'll round it out with that if we have some time. All right, here we go.

This is the first ad. I don't know what brand it is. My flat ass has caused me nothing but trouble. Not necessarily true. This is speak of recent airplane butt pain or how your Twitter campaign to bear ass for 10,000 has been less than fruitful.

Yeah, this is barely true, but I was on a JetBlue flight yesterday and the seat was the issue. It wasn't my seat that was the issue. It was the plane seat. One half of it had a cushion. The other was hard metal. So my ass was asleep for five hours.

This is so fucked up. These problems are a thing of the past thanks to vacuum butt lift center. Saying the full name each time is required. Yeah, you don't have to read the parts. Is that part of the infection? Vacuum butt lift center offers cheap, quick, and very, very safe procedures.

I feel like using very is like hide. Yeah. Designed to add better volume, quick, and very, very safe procedures. I feel like using very is like, yeah. Designed to add better volume, shape, and projection to your buttocks. Nice, yeah. That bled onto my mic for sure. Sorry, I'm so excited about these ad reads. Looking to remodel... Looking to remodel your silhouette?

Vacuum butt lift center will turn your flatty into a fatty required personal experience discuss okay um i guess i could benefit from injecting fat from my flanks into my rear uh just give it more of a plump round shape a little squish although i do think that my ass is quite fat thank you em Emma. What would you do with your new improved butt lift center wagon? I guess I would, I don't know, get fucked. You can't say that on ad reads.

This is for ass replacements and you can't say anything about sex? Butt lift center, not ass lift center. Okay, I guess what I would do with it is I would do less squats. Alright? I just wouldn't do that anymore because I got the first procedure done. How much does this cost? Even let's get this fucking over the vacuum at vacuum butt lift center.

An absolute dumper is not a typical outcome, but it is an attainable outcome. Thank you. Vacuum butt lift center for sponsoring this episode. So it ends by saying it's not even a guarantee that you get the ass. Not a guarantee, but it's possible. So how much does it cost? I didn't say anything. There's not even a URL to point them to. It's not a coupon. Depends's possible. So how much does it cost? It didn't say anything. There's not even a URL to point them to. It's not a coupon.

It depends on the starting bet. My ass is very good. Okay. It has a shapeliness to it. It has a nice blend of firmness and jiggle. We're going to have to cut this out. But you can tell us. No, this is just...

You said baked in ads. This is after the ad now. So I'm saying, right, but that it completely, you know... Yeah, it completely you know yeah it's just experience of the ad read that you just did exactly exactly okay i had by the way i had a meeting with connie this is real where she was talking about integrating showing off the product on camera for video ads so what the well well that was there's so many there's like 18 words behind just the well next one

this is so fucked yeah yeah overall good job with the read yeah just again maybe don't read the red text

because those are instructions it just feels like I want to explain it a little bit because yeah it doesn't feel true to my experience

hey listeners I want to get serious it's bit because, yeah, it doesn't feel true to my experience. Hey, listeners, I want to get serious. It's no secret that— Slow down, slow down, slow down. Let's make this really, really serious, please. Hey, listeners, I want to get serious. It's no secret that our country is in disarray. I agree. It feels like at any time we scroll through social media, we're doom-scrolling.

It's time we take a stand behind a candidate who truly cares about making a difference doc dr oz is running to put america first and empower the american people rush your support now that's bad copy that's bad copywriting i'll agree it's bad copywriting but again we didn't do it. Yeah, this is from... We'll send that back to him. The Dr. Oz people.

This is so fucked up. Behind Oz, we will take down the radical socialist left. I'm a registered member of the DSA. Oz will help defeat the woke mob. And I will finally be able to truly say what I feel on this podcast. Oz will allow every law-abiding American citizen to buy the gun of their desire. His strongest memories of fatherhood are teaching his son how to shoot before handing him his lunch and putting him on the bus to school.

That's really early to shoot a gun. 7.15 in the morning. The age is fine. Early age. Yeah. Look, I'm not going to say that we agree with this but we're not the ones putting our voice behind it usually if there's any kind of controversial

ad somebody from the sales team will email the host and be like do you feel comfortable advertising you know with the amount of money that they're giving us how much money did Oz give you there's campaign finance laws I'd rather keep that confidential. I love the joys of hunting.

The feeling it elicits is good. I think you should be stronger. I've never shot a gun. I've never hunted. How would you raise your... I guess you could talk about how you would give your kids shooting training before. I would never do that. i don't have

kids it's required we'll cut this out if i have a son because he said son yeah i'm sure he'd love if i gendered it if i have a son i'm gonna put a gun in his hands before pre-k i like that oz is running for u.s senate to reignite our divine spark, bravely fight for freedom, and finally tell it like it is. I'm not going to say this. This is... I don't care if the other guy never leaves his basement. That's fine. Can I use a different name?

Yeah. What do you think? Didn't you just come up with a new nickname? I, Desmond James, fully endorse Dr. Oz for PA Senate. This ad was paid for by Oz for Senate. Great. Yeah, nice. Easy.

No, you cornered me. Now you have me on record. And your fucking buddy runs the fucking Out of Context HeadGum podcast and they're going to fucking tweet me endorsing Oz. By the way, perfect metaphor. Anyone who votes for him thinking he has the keys to the City of Emerald. City of Apples.

I'm flustered because I just endorsed a fucking fascist. This room is kind of the City of Emerald if you think about it. Oh, God. Yeah, I'd rate it number three. It's one more. Yeah, I'm not doing this one.

I guess we, yeah, we can just splice around it and re-edit it to make it succinct. Welcome to Jeopardy! New York City Edition Part 2. We did it. Wow. We did this 51 weeks ago. What's that? I said live on stage.

Live on stage. We did Jeopardy! New York City Edition. This is Jeopardy! New York City Edition Continued. And this is for not actual cash, but I will actually buy the winner a drink tonight. Great. If you come to dinner. Trying to make my prizes real, things you can actually keep.

But as mentioned, also on last week's podcast, I don't have a credit card anymore because I'm not responsible and was living in debt. So now I only have the cash that's in my checking. Where's that theme? Fuck. Okay. I haven't played this before. so where's that theme fuck um okay I haven't played this before is it standard Jeopardy rules

or is there any sort of twists I need to know about you don't need to know about any twists it's just standard Jeopardy rules all intents and purposes

Jeopardy rules um and honestly Jeopardy rules uh team one is Marika team two is Joel and team three is Johnnyny let's get things

fucking started with honestly marika i'll take culture for 300 culture this these are all related to new york city all right the city of apples culture for 200 irving avenue and ridgewood queens anybody can answer charity rules what is a street oh says ridgewood there joel said what is a street what is a street oh incorrect oh the most radioactive part on the east coast most radioactive block in new york but actually, yeah, the East Coast. I forgot about that. We learned that recently.

I couldn't tell. Very good. Johnny controls the board. Let's do underrated museums for 200. Underrated museums for 200. A hidden gem on the Upper West Side made famous by its ties to grass. Ties to grass?

The Natural History Museum? Correct! Can you explain that answer? Oh, yeah. So, the Natural History Museum mostly has exhibits on the natural world, the world around us, which, if I'm not mistaken,

is like 80% grass. No. It's 80% water. Yeah. What? There is a giant blue whale hanging in it. The museum, which isn't a hidden gem,

by the way. It's a pretty famous museum. Have you seen the night, the museum movies? No. You're missing out. Let's do culture for 100. Culture for 100.

The corner of 3rd and Driggs. What is the place that you used to live in Williamsburg? Obviously not correct. Incorrect. Yeah. What is a bar you frequented when you lived in Williamsburg? I'll give it to Joel. The correct answer we were looking for was,

where in Williamsburg did Jeff get an open container ticket for brown bagging a beer? This is culture to you? This is New York culture. This is his culture. Sidewalk stoops. I love stoop culture. Joel controls the board. Or should I say the Jordan.

That's Joel and board Let's finish it out with culture for 300 Culture for 300 this one's a gimme Madison Square Park What is where the first Shake Shack is Don't give that to him No Do you know Marika?

No I just don't want Joel to have it for that fact Where is the Flatiron District? Do you know, Marika? No. I just didn't want Joel to have it for that fact. Where is the Flatiron District? That's incorrect. Okay. I think it is, yeah. I think 2015. 2015?

The correct answer was, where did Jeff have a a full body nervous breakdown in high school I thought that was in Union Square I was incorrect about Union Square It ultimately was Madison Square What happened But I'll give it to Marika for thinking about me Marika controls the board That's also not what I meant to say

Let's go Upstate nonsense for 300 upstate nonsense for 300. Upstate nonsense for 300. John Grimm. What is our video producer in New York? Who is? Can you be a little more specific? Even just one more sentence of specificity.

Who is our video producer that lives in upstate New York? I'll give it to you. The answer we were looking for was, who is Kingston, New York's least wanted? I'm just going to dox him. That's a big city. Is it? Marika controls the board.

I'll take upstate nonsense for 200. Upstate nonsense for 200. Bearsville, New York. Upstate nonsense for 200. Upstate nonsense for 200. Bearsville, New York. What is where Jeff got arrested for public nudity? Where is Jeff's dream place to live?

I want to give it to Joel, but it was private nudity. You got arrested for this? My body went into a state of arrest. Because the last time I had sex in Ulster County was in Bearsville. Joel controls the board. I didn't think that was going to happen again. Yeah. Why didn't you think that was going to

happen again? I meant to keep that internal. Let's finish off Upstate Nonsense 100. Upstate Nonsense for 100. That's where... Where is my boss,

Andrew Pyle's home address? Correct! Just a quick scorch update. We've got Marika in first at 600 and Johnny and Joel tied for second at 400. Joel controls the board.

Let's go DA Yankees for 300. It's DA Yankees. The bleacher creatures. You can also phone a friend. Any of you. Phone a friend? What are raccoons? Anytime there's a lengthy pause,

I know that it's wrong. So you almost don't have to hit the button. Right. Bleacher creatures. What are rats? Joel, do you want to phone a friend? Maybe Patrick? Biggest Yankee fan in the room?

Yeah, I'd love to phone in Patrick. What do you got for bleacher creatures? I'm assuming it's the fans that sit in the bleachers. The correct answer was what group of fans needs to calm down? Well, he was right. That's true.

You were right, though. All right, Joel just pulled ahead by phoning a friend. That doesn't feel fair, but he controls the board. Underrated museums, 300. Underrated museums for 300 a frankly bizarre museum with a dorky name guggenheim johnny

let's go whitney johnny and joel now tied for first the tides have turned marika johnny controls the board with only five more options let's see if Marika can pull ahead let's do underrated museums for one underrated museums for 100 a museum known

for its artistic recency what is MoMA that is absolutely correct really recent modern

Joel controls the board four more on the board sorry five more all things Carnegie for 100 all things Carnegie for 100 steal this one you guys have to have words specifically otherwise I'm not giving it to you

what is a material used to make railroads what is oh no used to make railroads? What is... Oh, no. Now I don't want to. No, you got it. It's so vague. Jeopardy would be way more...

It's so hard to figure out. Steel! Yeah. What is the factory production owned by Carnegie? Johnny. What Carnegie Hall steel girders are made of? The answer we were looking for is what was Andrew Carnegie's favorite metal? That's not a good one.

Marika was closest. I'm going to give it to her. And she controls the board. So you're just going to give it to people who are close? No. Yeah. Well, some are empirically wrong. She was close.

I'll take all things Carnegie for 200. All things Carnegie for 200. The Carnegie Mansion. What is the place that Andrew Carnegie last fucked? That's not what I put, but that's way funnier. I said, where's Jeff Gunning

to live at? Marika controls the board yet again. I'll take all things Carnegie for 300. We've got Marika in first at 900, Joel in second at 800,

Johnny in third. It should be noted that I haven't lost any points for getting things wrong. Nobody has. Yeah. Listen,

it's anybody's game at this point. Okay. 300. All things Carnegie. All things Carnegie for 300. A deep appreciation

of learning. What are the students of Carnegie Mellon University? This is New York City edition. Oh, yes. Deep appreciation of learning. How to get to Carnegie Hall. An artificial intelligence model designed by Andrew Carnegie.

See, nobody was even close there. It's what did Andrew Carnegie have? Let's swing it over to Johnny. The Yanks for two. All right. The Yankees for 200. The Steinbrenner family. What is the owners of the Yankees?

Let's everybody get their answer before I tell you you're all wrong. What is the last family to fuck at the Yankees stadium? Family. Couple. Couple. Steinbrenner family. You said who owns?

Yeah. Who are the sponsors for the public broadcasting station? Johnny. A family who liked to attend Yankees games. That's basically exactly right. Who loves the Yankees? Crazy. That is insane.

All right, Johnny controls the board. It's not anybody's game necessarily. Joel can't win, but he can tie, which would be really frustrating. That's never happened in Jeopardy history before. Everyone let me answer first. Johnny and Marika tied for first. Joel in third, actually.

Trick question. Nobody has ever had their last name on the back of a Yankees jersey. Nobody has ever had their last name on the back. What is there is no player named nobody? What did you say? I didn't say anything. You said A-Rod.

Yeah. Okay. Phrase it as a question. Who is A-Rod? Okay. Nobody's A-Rod. This is the easiest one. I also think you showed us the answer to this one before we started.

But I forget it. No, it was this. It was just the question. Oh. Trick question. Nobody's ever had their last one in the back. Reverse engineer. You're an engineer.

Reverse engineer the sentence into a question. What is? What is on the back of a Yankees jersey? Who has had the... Is that it? Johnny is absolutely correct. Although that was your second guess. So...

Oh, I get it. Because they don't have names on the back. Yeah, we were looking for who's the only player to ever have their name on the grace the back of a Yankees costume. Yeah, that makes sense. What?

It's all about the name on the front of the jersey a Yankees costume. Yeah. That makes sense. What? It's all about the name on the front of the jersey Marika. Oh God. I don't watch baseball. Baseball sucks. Sorry. Just how I feel.

There's no hating in baseball. I think I'll give it I'll give 50 to Johnny because you guessed twice. Yeah I guess. Johnny wins.

Thanks everybody. So I guess Johnny wins. Thanks. Nice job. Thanks, Joel. Plugs. I have another record in eight minutes. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go.

Rapid fire. What do you got? All right. Follow me at Johnny VJH and NYVII and also get your flu shot and your COVID shot. Let's start with vote for John Fetterman. Tell my PA fam out there. I know Jeff doesn't want Fetterman, but you should all vote for John Fetterman. And you can follow me on Instagram if you want Joel Man Donoff to private account's a private account, so I'll accept that on a case-by-case basis.

That's insane. That's fucking crazy. That's the worst. Marika. Follow me, at Marika Elan, on Twitter, Instagram, and Letterboxd. And follow PitWallPod on Instagram and TikTok. At JeffBiardi on Twitter. Nearing 10,000.

Nearing bearing whole. We'll see you guys again next week. This whole thing was Dawes. That was a Hiddem Original.