The Headgum Podcast - 250: Fish and Chai

Episode Date: April 11, 2025

Marika, Emma, and Amir join Geoff to discuss reverse uni and Emma’s Trilemmas, before playing Two Chais and a Lie, and engaging in a good old fashioned glaring contest!» FOLLOW Geoff on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/geoffreyjames/» FOLLOW Amir on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amir/» FOLLOW Marika on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/marikaelon/» FOLLOW Emma on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/emmarosefoley/Advertise on The Headgum Podcast via Gumball.fmRate The Headgum Podcast 5-stars on Apple PodcastsRate The Headgum Podcast 5-stars on SpotifyJoin the Headgum DiscordSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a head gum original Previously on the head gum podcast and you're also in like a very wrinkled suit By the way, is this California cocktail enough for you guys? And so I brought it to see if this works and then I'm gonna get it pressed Yeah, you can pretty much wear any cool article of clothing. Yeah, it's cool with the little cropped pants, too Those aren't cropped pants. He just has very thin legs You sort of started that When did you do it the short suit I wore to did I do it no I wore it to

Some wedding you did to wear it to some wedding and people were wore it to some wedding. You did wear it to some wedding. And people were complimenting like, wow, that's smart, cause it's really hot out. It was LeBron and then you. Yes, that's right. Those were the two most influential fashion. I think it was Pee Wee Herman first. Oh, that's fair.

And then LeBron. You need LeBron and then me. Yeah. It's tough that, you know, the people love this show so much. They love our chemistry, especially the four of us specifically. It's like, it doesn't matter how our interpersonal relations sour it, we still have to meet and record because we need to make the cash, we need to get the ads and we need to please the fans. Right? I mean, who's your relationship soured with? I mean, obviously, since your bones started turning into fiber, I feel like there's less of you to go around physically and emotionally.

I feel like Emma's moving. She's not moving to LA. That obviously feels like a personal slight to me. And obviously, Amir and I have had like a contentious devil on the shoulder style relationship for a while. Who's the devil? No, that is we both have only a devil on our shoulder and no angels. So we end up kind of just repeating whatever the demon says. Does that make sense?

Not really. Amir, you were saying that Amazon's going to buy TikTok and you were having like a meltdown about it. Amazon is making a bid to control all of it. You won't be able to use your phone, you won't be able to use your smart home without plugging your DNA directly up Bezos' ass. Oh shit, I'm out. Oh, Alexa already knows and she's ordered it. I wonder what they know about, oh, your algorithm has it all on lock. They own the health insurance, so they know your medical records.

They own the algorithms, so they know what you like to see and where to be. We're entirely heading towards a place where we won't have to think or do. We're just gonna sit and stew. Holy shit. Wow! Wow! I'm merely on the podcast when Amir is also here

and Justin Amir is competing energies. It's like just so intense. I sort of think it's like a devil on the shoulders. I was gonna say, because there's no angel. Because there's no angel. There's no angel, yeah. There is no angel. There's no angel. There's no angel. There's no angel, yeah. There is no angel.

There's no darling angel. There is no darling angel. I've got a demon on my ass. Here's what I will say. My girlfriend's a musician. She was using this software that strips the masters of her songs into individual stems because she has a show next week She was talking to me about it. I get an ad for the stems I used to be like oh they just it's like a

Calculation of like what you search and like what you do it. Maybe what you DM people. Nope only spoke about it got them ad literally five minutes later They assure us literally five minutes later. This is a 218S talking point. Dab, dab, dab, dab, dab, dab. They assure us. They assure us. It's crazy this has never happened to you. No, I have always had the ads based on shit I say, but I've been able to extend my disbelief and be like,

well, I also, because I was talking about it, was searching it, so it must be based on Google Ads, Sense, or some shit. Some back-end thing. Would you rather have ads that aren't hyper-targeted to you? Don't you wanna be seen and heard so that they can excel you? Don't you want your ads targeted like that? Like that.

I don't, because then I buy it, and then I have debt, right? I don't need the shit. This whole room's filled with shit I don't because then I buy it and then I have debt right I don't need the shit This whole room is filled with shit. I don't need So many things rather get an ad Mine the only thing is my laptop and my cup that way you're watching my time fucking So proper on getting ads for diabetes medication that doesn't actually far see good yeah far see far see you got see far see you got far see you got far see you got far see you got far see you got hopefully got an ad you got an ad for far see you're gonna be learning far My Bond of the Week is Tua Tagovalioa. Who's that?

He's a football player who's had like five really bad head injuries. And buddy, I'm no stranger to the traumatic brain injuries. I know you can't do everything you did before the same way. So I think football is a little too dangerous for Tua. Let's have him be 007 or at the very least a best-boy grip on the shit. Do you think the football experience extends to best-boy grip experience? Do you think you're just buying time because you don't have a bond? My bond is Akiva Schaffer from The Lonely Island.

That's funny. Why him? I think he has the right energy for it. He's got a very calm demeanor, but then he like when he raps, he goes really hard. I think he looks like shit. Wow. How dare you talk about my guys like that?

I have to do something else, I have to put together my new vacuum. Look he's handsome enough for the layman, but he's not the bond man. That didn't rhyme. Not everything has to rhyme. You can also just say shit in the same intonation. People enjoy it. Two or five confessions is the guy. He's got the look.

He's I would say more handsome than Akiva. That's so fucked up. And especially if he slims down a little bit, like because he's got the bulky mass. And I think that Bond has more of that lean muscle. You know what I mean? Us, a soccer player has a bulky mass. Sorry, you took me saying football, translated it to British and thought that I was saying soccer.

The American football quarterback toui Taglioval. Well, I guess I heard the name and I was like, surely this is an Italian man. Tua Tagovallio. He's I think he's Hawaiian. Gotcha. Emma, Bond of the Week, or do you not give a shit? I don't give a shit. My Bond of the Baldwin's. I'm watching. I've heard that show is absolutely atrocious. Is Haley on it? I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I've heard that show is absolutely atrocious.

Is Haley on it? Or is that would that be watching the Haley Baldwin slash Beaver? Oh, no, she's not on it. I've only watched two episodes. It's like, I assume a money grab, but it also seems like a vehicle to like deal with the trauma from him killing that woman on set. And it's like, you see him find out that she died. It's like very, and I do think that they're doing the show

as a way to process the trauma in a kind of interesting way. Don't get me wrong, he's bad for other reasons. The way he treats people in the streets, I think his politics are bad. How does he treat people in the streets. I think his politics are bad. How does he treat people in the streets? He said, wait, I actually, when I was at my cousin's rehearsal dinner, when I was 14 years old, my other cousin was like, she must've been 11, I guess. And we saw him in the restaurant.

And we like, I think kind of like vaguely watched 30 Rock as children. And we went up to his table. And I don't know what we said to him, but he looked at my cousin and was like, this is my next wife, the 11 year old one. That's like a 1950 joke. Isn't that awesome? You have to tell Anya that.

I'll tell Anya. Yeah, Anya's age gap discourse. I mean, I mean, we know we get into it. He invented age gap discourse. I have something personal I want to say about age gap, but I keep it to myself. I'm not like that. I'm not like that. I do not like that at all. It's it's Scooby Doo. Yeah.

Yeah, that's new one, right? I think we've done it once or twice before. Jesus. Very good. Guys, that's taken us into the word of the fucking day. Right. How often none of you guys are really sushi havers, right? I know Marika, you specifically hate the fish. Yeah, I'm not a raw fish gal. It's actually, ironically, kind of one,

the one area of beef that Marika and I have. Is fish. It's fish. Emma, you like sushi here. So I guess you don't wanna know know my Bond of the Week or... Do you have one? You seemingly hate the segment every week. Spicy tuna roll. It's a fucking whitefish salad with a bean.

It's time for a James Cod. That's really good, actually. He backed his way into one of the greatest Bonds of the Week we've ever had. Your Bond of the Week is carp? Yeah. Yeah. Or tripe. Tripe is beef.

And I've got beef with tripe. Tripe is beef, for sure. Because I don't really like it. And I'm the one that said carp, to be clear. Slippery tongue of it all. So what is it? Trout? Sand? Mike Trout and Tim Salmon are my Bonds of the Week. If you must know, two men named after fish. We didn't press you on it. It could have been Trey Anastasio.

So it's like a full on Marine style suggestion festival. I think it's a full on Silence of the Week. And now we're going to have a full on Marine style suggestion festival. So we're going to have a full on Marine style suggestion festival. So we're going to have a full on marine style suggestion festival. I think it's a full on silencing of me as you continue to talk over the host instead of...

That's what you want all the time. Overlapping dialogue. That's what you tout. That's what you praise. That's what you beg of us. And now, yeah, deep breaths. You and I need to go to an MFT. What's that?

Marriage and Family Therapist. Got it. Because there's so much resentment from me to you that I don't know where to start with the show. Yeah, I guess I don't know where to start with this show. Yeah, I guess I don't notice it. All right, guys. Word of the day.

Amir, do you like sushi? Yeah. So you're familiar with uni. Yep. What about reverse uni where you kind of flip over an onigiri and it reverses? And you. OK. Well, asshole. The word of the day is researching. All right. It means to research urchins. Can I pitch in another one?

I was going to move on, but yeah. Resturgeon to reuse a sturgeon. That's a different word, though. That's not the word. Great work. I'm glad you coined it. It's not the word of the day, though. Yeah, it was research and not resturgeon. It's only vaguely related to the game of uni

that involves reverse uni. Yeah, that's a different thing I invented. Yeah, this whole episode has been pretty fish themed. I'm just realizing. I wonder if there's something to that. Do we know what astro sign we're in right now? Is it like fish related or mercury, which is found in sushi in retrograde or something like that?

Do you guys know anything about that? If we were still in Pisces, you would have been 100% correct with everything you just said. I know. No, you don't. You don't believe in any of that shit. Or in Aries. And it's rising.

I see Virgo rising is a very good sign. Strong and kind. And the little boy's mine. Kenny Loggins is my final pick. Oh my God. Sorry, there's no coming back from that unless we separate it into the first and second half. Guys, imagine if there was an edible that was so loomy that it didn't get you too stoned, it got you feeling grand, right?

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Code, what's that? Loomiegummies.com code, I love saying it, what's that? And enjoy whatever edible you're high. And we're back. Guys, I have to bring this up. I didn't really want to. I thought this segment was gonna mostly die. Emma, this made me think of you a lot.

Oh god. Okay, wait. Sorry. This actually made me think of you a lot. You can read it out. Read it out loud to the audio listeners. Oh, sorry. Nobody cares about your mental health until it turns into anger then everyone sees you as a bad person. Jeffrey is saved this post. and sees you as a bad person. Jeffrey has saved this post from pointless existence posted on December 6th from 2024. And could you read the caption? Nobody cares, little crying face, heartbreak.

This whole thing made me think of you a ton. So where am I in this paradigm? I mean- Is it uni or reverse uni for me? Neither, it was like you see, it's like reverse uni for me. Neither. It was like you see it's like what is looking at a photo of Emma. OK, what do you think about that? Marika and Amir, I guess I also had the same question. Is that uni?

Yeah, I was going to say uni. Yeah. Like, are you in the nobody cares about mental health stage or are you in the anger? I mental health stage, or are you in the anger everyone sees you as a bad person stage? I'm getting angry and people are worried. Not worried. Not worried. Ostracizing you from civil society, which is, by the way, why you're moving out of Manhattan, because you can't cut it in Manhattan.

You're not one of the 400. And if you're in Manhattan, you need to cut it. Cut it. You need to cut it. Cut it. You need to cut it. That fish is way too urchin. You need to cut it. Grace, cut that into a way where I look like I came up with that on the spot, where I'm kind of firing on all cylinders. Anyway, that was all that just kind of it kind of made me think of you.

All right. Bringing it into. Emma's trilemmas, right? Is a qualitative, quantitative, not qualitative segment. Emma, how often have you had to make a difficult decision between three options? Aka a trilemma. How often have you had to make a difficult decision between three options, AKA a trilemma?

Moving was a trilemma. You had three apartments you liked? I had one option to live with one other person, one option to move into this bedside place, one option to stay in my place and bleed money and try to sublet it for a month and go somewhere else. So yeah. So that was the last time that I can think of and share on the podcast. You stopped sharing sound by the way. The clapping got really quiet. It sounded like tiny tiny taps

That's awesome, all right moving on to I Gotta start writing this fucking book guys Actually a book Reading one and are you? No Don't know how to pronounce the consonants right. You don't have to read it out loud. In a way. Amiriseth is looking into the middle distance. Something is happening right in front of my house and I've been staring at it for 10 minutes straight and it's a guy who parked in front of my house. I've been staring at it for 10 minutes straight. And it's a guy who parked in front of my house. I've never seen this man before.

And he's slowly putting a sticker or a decal on his back windshield. And a guy came, walked by who I've never seen before and dapped him up. And then he kept walking. I can't see what he's putting on his car. It's a fixing a bumper stick. My other car is a massage sticker. Yeah. And it's over here. So I can't see. I need to like go outside and look.

And then I'll let you guys know and come back. But I'm so he's so happy and proud to be. I've never seen someone put on a bumper sticker. I've only seen bumper stickers and people putting on airs. Yeah, maybe it's like a baby on board thing, because like the type of credit a bumper sticker. I've only seen bumper stickers. And people putting on airs. Yeah. Maybe it's like a baby on board thing. Because like the type of credit he got was like very wholesome for it. So I'm so curious what it says. I really want it to be a co-exist bumper sticker.

Amen. That's awesome. He's like dusting it up. He's taking such pride in affixing this thing. I'll take a picture and show you guys. pride in affixing this thing. I'll take a picture and show you guys. My dad once spent so long putting the bumper sticker of my sister's one of my sister's colleges on the car. There is proud University of Phoenix dad. But he put my dad put it on the inside or the outside.

So it was like wrong. So it was backwards dad put it on the inside or the outside. So it was like wrong. So it was backwards and you couldn't see it from the outside. And then he was just like so sad and disappointed in himself. That's funny. I did send a snippet of a book that I am reading to Amir and Marika in our group chat where we send interesting slash bad copy. Marika, would you and then Amir responded the beginning of your book. Marika, would you mind reading this

as if it was an audio book? The thing that you just sent to the three of us, the portion of a book that I'm asked. Yeah. Yeah. Just ask you for clarification. I understand that like a completely other group chat. And then you sent this to. I don't want to reset. I already said to the other one. I understand that like- Cause you were talking about a completely other group chat and then you sent this to other people. I don't wanna reset, I already sent it in the other one.

I understand that like regular social norms are not at play during this podcast, but you bringing up the group chat that you have the two other people on the Zoom that I'm not in. Well, it's specifically with people who like, I don't think you would enjoy the group chat. It's like, I don't think you'd wanna get five texts a day

of like billboards that are bizarre a little bit. Separately from knowing this, I have sent you your copy. Once. Just directly. You've sent it once. Because it reminded me of you. And then by the way, the one time you did that, which was only once, I did send it to that group chat.

And I didn't give you credit. All right, Marika, this is as if you're auditioning to read for an audiobook. Okay. The town was so miserable, even for Texas, that once it had been named Sour Lake, nobody had the nerve to suggest it be improved. Or the energy. Pretty good.

You mean it's pretty good. Like the right. That's how I would want to start a fucking book. Although I would kind of really hang on energy. No one had the nerve to suggest to be improved or the energy. Yeah. No one even had the energy to suggest something. This was a cold read for me.

So here's what I'll also say. When I first read this chapter, I thought, because I have to read everything like 18 times before it really locks in. No, I was like... I thought that the qualifier, because or the energy, is a fragment and not a sentence. What is happening to your mouth?

I have a hair and a shit, a fly away. I thought they were saying nobody had the nerve to suggest it be improved, or the energy be improved. But what they're saying is they don't have the nerve or the nerve to suggest it be improved or the energy be improved. But what they're saying is they don't have the nerve or the energy to suggest it be approved. I'm just saying they don't have the nerve to improve the name or the energy of the place. Anyway. So what's this book? That's just a separate book, an excerpt that I thought would be fun.

But you're not going to share the name of that one? I wrote this. If you're listening to this and you haven't read L.A. Woman by Eve Babbitt's, I wrote that. This is a novel title that I'll pitch. The Charter Bums. It tells the story of a Sierra

Nevada hike between three friends as they hop from rock to rock. They also shart a lot. From rock to rock, they also shart a lot. It's a play on the Dharma Bums. What? Yeah, it is totally locate the city culture, but got it. And I had no idea what either of those things were, so it was helpful for me. I mean, you like that book? No, never heard of it. I hated that book. I it was helpful for me, Emma. I mean, you like that book?

Never heard of it. I hated that book. I don't like Jack Kerouac. I tried so hard. I have you see every day. Have you read Big Sur? Big Sur is pretty good. Big Sur is the only Jack Kerouac book

that's not just him being like, and I got drunk off wine. OK, that actually sounds good. Now you're making me feel like maybe there was something for me in there. Well, that's, okay, if I did an audio book of fucking, what's the one that he, actually Big Sur, he drinks a lot in a way that's boring to me.

I just, he like has sex with women and calls them the Bodhisattvas. And that just put me off. And I had a threesome with Allen Ginsberg, which opened my eyes not to my queerness, but to the fact that the woman was a god to have. I think you just had too much wine. Guys, this is bringing us into the not fully unrelated game.

Welcome to two lies and a chai. Okay. Where did Amir go? He probably to look at this guy outside. He said he wants to see the sticker. He wrote it in the chat. He didn't see what it says. Oh, OK.

So are we not going to continue or are you going to? I can't explain. OK, to... Okay, here we go. What did the sticker say? Little dude on board. Whoa. So he was... He's a proud father. Welcome to Two Lies and a Chai. Boo! What? Guys, I'm going to list out a couple sets of things where there's two things that are untrue entirely and one chai.

Ready? Ready? Yeah. All right. One, when I was in college, I almost minored in the geography of wine. Two, my biggest fear is succumbing to renal failure. And three, Tazo classic chai latte.

Yeah, the first two were true, it's the last one was a chai. That's actually wrong. The first two were lies, because the game is two lies and a chai. And what's the game part? You have to guess which is the chai. OK, we know which one was the chai.

Yeah, you still got it wrong, because you said the first two were truth and the last one was a chai. This is like that. Say chai like that. For the one for the first 20 years of my life I thought ham came from eggs. Two, I've been to the Caribbean a lot. Three, Oregon chai chai tea latte concentrate. It's gonna be the Oregon chai chai tea latte concentrate. Correct! A good chai concentrate. One, part of my weekly routine is calling in bomb threats to various chapters of the Boys and Girls Club of America

Two I've never held a pen Three Twining's chai tea bags The last one is the twining. Correct, correct One I think cars should be single use. Two, Harney and Sons Chai. Three, I feel like school field trips to museums have the same energy as January 6th. I just really want, it's not the answer,

but I wanna unpack the last one. And it's going to be the Harnian sun, of course. Again, the only thing that says chai in it. One that's chai in it, in it, in it, in it. You guys suck. One, my smile opens as many doors as it does thighs. Two, the Republic of T. Bridgerton edition, Anthony and Kate Spiced Chai. Three, I would take Ozempic if it came as a malt.

I'm gonna go with the Republic of T. Briditone Edition of Anthony and Kate Spiced Chai. And is it sold at William and Sonoma? Yep. That was two lies and a chai. How are we feeling? Is it William and Sonoma or is it William's Sonoma? It's William's Sonoma. I hate to call you out like that,

but I actually wasn't sure. I didn't even know what I said, so. Well, then good. All right, guys, ready? Neither do I then. Then good. All right, guys, ready? Neither do I then. This is a segment called musical glares.

This is like musical chairs, only no physical space required. So it's perfect for a Zoom episode, right? What I'm going to do is I'm going to play a song and when the music stops suddenly, you have to glare directly into the camera. Now I wanna clarify, a glare is very different than a stare, all right? I will be the judge of everyone's glares. If you stare instead of glare, you're out.

Do we understand? Yes. Guys? Yeah. Alright, here we go. Ready? 25 minutes. That's our time. All right. Pretty good, pretty good. Ready?

And this is for the listeners too? Okay, how about this? I'll just... Commitment to not talking during the music. I will decide... I will describe, rather, everyone's stares. That'll be for the audio listeners. It was glares.

It's different from stares. Now you got me saying stares. Now you got me saying stares. That'll be for the music, the audio. It was glares. It's different from stares. Now you got me saying stares. Here we go. What kind of coffee is that? It's cold brew. My first cold brew in like literally months. Wow. I have trouble when they put the cold brew in the paper cup. Yeah, I don't like it. Alright, Marika is kind of frowning with her mouth.

She looks unsure of who she's staring at. Amir looks disappointed in the person, like they just really fucked up. And Emma looks like she's holding in a Charter bum. Emma, I'm sorry, but you are gonna have to be out for that one. That was not a stare. That was a glare. It wasn't a glare. Here we go.

Ready? I realized I was looking directly into my camera. That works. Is this music gonna be a copyright situation? No, it's no copyright music. Sneaky background music for videos. Tom. All right, Marika's squinting

and Amir looked like he just got a lobotomy. You are gonna be out, Amir. Our winner is. Marika. Huge. I don't think I've ever won a glaring competition before. All right, guys, it's been a while since we did kind of an oops, all questions segment where we kind of get to know each other a little bit more and it's kind of a jumping off point for jokes, joy and wisdom. Here we go. A couple of questions I just want to ask you guys in these last 10 minutes. What makes a good question?

Something that is answerable. What are the different types of questions? Sorry, this is to get to know us. I looked up list of questions. There's rhetorical, that's one. Multiple choice. There's rhetorical, that's one. Yeah. Multiple choice. There's like math. Yeah, conceptual questions. Theoretical questions.

Exam questions like essay prompts. Biblical questions. You get like there's like personal questions. No. Yes. Yeah. That's not it. So I don't know why we all fell silent.

Sorry, you're looking for a specific answer? I am like totally lost in space. How can I ask better questions? And that's one of the questions. I guess for the show, it'd be interesting to have like questions that are debatable, so it inspires conversation. Okay. Yeah, I would say true curiosity,

where you don't have kind of like a sound effect or something queued up. Okay, great. So on that subject, on that subject, what is a question? That's debatable. Didn't you just ask that? He looks so pleased with himself. I asked what makes a good, ask not what a question could do for you.

Ask what makes a good question. Got it. Okay. What are some examples of open ended questions? I mean, some of the things you're asking us, I suppose. Yeah, all of the things you're asking questions with no specific answers. Answers. Yeah. What is like? What is a question or what makes a debatable conversation? Starter starters. Yeah. Also enders, because I was going to ask, what are some examples of closed questions?

Well, that doesn't mean it's a conversation and OK. There, I guess, what's the question? The question on my mind is, what are the benefits of asking questions? Learning, getting to know people. And how can I avoid asking leading questions? I would say don't have something pre-written that you're gonna say after. An agenda, yeah.

Don't fish for a specific answer. Heavily fish themed episode today. Yeah, don't start with the answer and work backwards is probably the... Yes. I don't feel like I've been doing that, but if you guys do feel that way about me, keep it to yourselves,

because I can't really handle criticism today. Yeah, we know. Uh, what are some questions to ask to get to know someone better? This is where I don't excel. Seed my time. I'll see. You can ask like where they're from or where they went to school. You can ask what their hobbies are.

I like to ask like if you're considered, if you had to like choose one trivia category to excel at, what do you know the most about? You can ask about their family, their history, any ideas for their future. You can ask their relationship with their friends or loved ones. You can ask what they spend the majority of their time doing, how they sleep, what their job is. You can ask if they have any ambitions or dreams. You can ask about whether or not they have like a faith. You've reached your limit on talking. Shut the fuck up. How do you sleep at night? Is that what you meant? No, nothing I said was accusatory.

To like meek biting your finger. You know, Meek Mill, I'm meek biting my finger. What's a meek? What the fuck is a meek? Goodfellas is talking to me. No, it's good. That's taxi driver. No, this is goodfellas.

Joe Pesci. Oh, what's so what's a what's a meek? What is the original line? What's a mook? Got it. Mook. I got to make sure that's not a slur. Doesn't matter. You're. It's a name of the famous person from White Lotus,

which is why I've been quoting that recently, because everybody's like, did you know that that one person in White Lotus is the most famous person on the planet? And I'll be like, what's a mook? Got it. Why do you guys not like my impressions? I just don't know the movie well enough. Yeah, I feel like I'm chasing after you and I can't catch you.

If you started a business, you didn't build that. Said Obama? I put on a tan suit. You guys weren't paying attention during the 2010s, man. You really weren't. You weren't. You didn't have your eyes open like I did enough to get those references, huh? Your eyes don't look comfortable. It looks like they're in pain.

They're yeah, because they're blood dry. No bread like you're in pain. They're, yeah. Because they're bloodshot. They're dry. No. It's red, like you've been crying. Fuck. No, it's bounce back redness from using my LUMIFY drops. Yeah. Also, I need to get to Dr. Arthur Benjamin O.D. in West Holly Weird, California.

He's unbelievable, the greatest ophthalmologist in the fucking world. I sent Avi Tal to him. She had a great experience. Did she? I don't care. Marika? What? Ha ha ha!

Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Um. Um. Plugs. What do you guys have going on? What do you want to point the people towards?

Let's start with why. Um, I don't think there's any new stuff happening when this comes out. So follow me at Marie Galan on everything. That's it. OK, OK. Marie. Uh, sorry. I'm here. So mad. I'm pissed. Why? Because you didn't.

But I soured the energy. You soured the lake. You sharded the bum. Sure. And I didn't plug what? Marshmallow. But we'll get to that. I thought everyone would plug it because it comes out today. You should have asked. And I didn't know what today was.

Follow me on Amazon. Great. Emma, right? Follow me at EmmaRoseFolley. Listen to Emma, right? Follow me at Emma Rose Foley. Listen to Here to Make Friends now on Headgum. Lots of exciting guests. And also I walked past the premiere of Hell of a Summer last night. It's like a few blocks from my house to Angelica East.

Did you say hi to outside? I didn't wasn't wasn't invited. Wasn't invited. Wasn't invited. Texted Billy yesterday, any screenings coming up. Wow, I didn't know that. Got back to me today. Got back to you today. Here I go.

Spotify, do your thing. Cancel his ass. On behalf of Marika. Guys, if you only have 20 bucks, Spotify, do your thing. Cancel his ass. On behalf of Marika. Guys, if you only have 20 bucks to see a movie in April, don't go see Hell of a Summer. Go see Marshmallow in select, and I really mean select, theaters. I don't think it's playing in New York.

I haven't seen it yet. It isn't. It it's playing in New York. I haven't seen it. It isn't. It's barely playing in New Jersey. I was in a horror movie two years ago. The episode of the Headgun Podcast, the only episode of the Headgun Podcast that I didn't host, that Marika hosted, was when I was in Kentucky filming the shit. I haven't seen the movie. I don't know if it's any good. So I should kind of. Your money from filming.

I think we have to wrap it up real fast. I just mean like... Yeah, I know what you mean. And I'm trying to not... ...the movie coming out in theaters, which is really exciting. Sorry, you think I have points on the back end... ...of this movie that I have like 20 lines in? I don't know.

Amir, are you gonna go to West Covina to see the movie that I'm in? Go support this little movie, very small budget. There are some cool actors in it other than me. I haven't seen the finished product, but the trailer looks good. So I think it'll be a barrel of fun if you like horror movies and thrillers.

And the more people we can get out to see it, the better likelihood we have of it being released wider and also getting, you know, on Netflix or Hulu or whatever. So would mean a lot if you go. Like, did he have somewhere to go? Nope! That was a Headgum Original.