The Headgum Podcast - 3: Hot Sax
Episode Date: May 29, 2020Jake, Amir, Marika, and Geoff discuss Megan Thee Stallion, OMSB, and the closing Headgum's LA office. Plus, Marika plays that sweet, sweet sax all night long!Rate The Headgum Podcast 5-stars ...on Apple Podcasts.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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This is a HeadGum Podcast.
What you just heard was Marika Brownlee on the hot sacks.
Oh, no.
That's right, though.
Marika, would you care to share the story?
I mean, it's not really a story.
We were trying to think of a theme song.
The thought of jazz came up.
I made a joke that I could hop on my sacks really quickly and jam.
And then I did, and it sounded bad, but everyone liked that
because I hadn't picked it up.
What's your sax history?
I played alto sax starting in sixth grade, I think,
because I wanted to be like Lisa Simpson,
even though she did not play an alto sax.
And then I tried to get into jazz band in sixth
grade did not make much like yeah also played percussion uh and it's like taking percussion
and sax lessons and then like played through eighth grade wow and then gave up the fact that
you so you played for two years like a long ago, feels like that's pretty good saxophone playing.
It was definitely muscle memory.
Like I still know all the notes.
I've forgotten how to read music entirely, but I like still like if someone wrote out like E, A, D, whatever, I could play that.
So how many, why have you held on to your sax for this long?
That's another question that I have.
It's not the same saxophone
like a few years ago my mother gifted me a saxophone for a holiday point you could have
sold it for cash slash parts sold it was that his point like sold it to buy parts of another sax did you guys know that i also played the saxophone the alto sax in fourth
grade really for uh i believe it was for just just the year though interesting i i conveniently
i was very bad i couldn't read the music i didn't practice. There was more than once where to get out of performing
in front of the class, I broke my reed in half. So I didn't have to show them that I couldn't play.
And one of the times I broke my reed, the teacher still made me just do the notes with my hands
and not blow. And I couldn't do that either. i i didn't think ahead that far um and uh then thankfully i broke
my hand uh to get out of get out of fucking no i didn't class you broke your hand i broke my
reed on purpose i broke my hand by accident trying to break the reed you broke the hand my finger snapped instead of the tiny piece
of thin wood that's that's a great premise i mean it's not gonna happen but lonely and horny season
three is ruby jade learned saxophone it's an adult community college class i'm incredibly gifted
wow who is that jazz man bleeding Bleeding Gums Murphy style.
That's the only way that he's redeemable. Should you record this as a video?
We've been getting some good content out of our podcast
and it has built in recording capability.
You have to just hit that button.
Here we go.
We are recording.
I didn't show up camera ready.
That was like you sprung that on me.
That was a little.
You're wearing a new HeadGum shirt.
It's the perfect.
I have to change my Zoom background.
I should probably change my background as well.
Oh, I have a sax story.
Nice.
Is that the Michigan Capitol?
I only had two ready to go, and the other one is Lemon Party.
So this is really the only Open Michigan rally I should do.
It's age appropriate.
What is Marika's?
Who is that guy?
Mine's Chris Evans. Oh, nice. It's age appropriate. What is Marika's? Who is that guy? Mine's Chris Evans.
Oh, nice.
Oh, very nice.
He is scholarly.
Look at that beard.
Amir's is Mars.
Jeffrey is Amir.
You look so bizarre in that photo.
I do?
I think I look better in that photo than I do IRL.
Yeah, I think that's my problem with it, that you kind of look hot.
I look too hot.
You look, yeah, you look pretty good.
Fuck.
You look like if Ryan Reynolds and John Walker had a baby.
I don't know who the second one is, but thank you.
Ryan Reynolds is so hot that even half of him is a compliment.
Oh, so my sax story is very similar to Marika's, but with a more public, or no, very similar
to Jake's, but with a more public or no very similar to jake's but with an
even more public twist i was in a i was in a play my fall of junior year of high school so this is
2015 i had yeah that would have been 2014 of course and 2014 yeah but i never had a senior
year i graduated a year early loser same i did it because Marika was doing it.
Jake, I think, actually did it.
I think it was the three of us.
Well, Jake had a 13th grade as punishment
for the kill list that they found in his locker.
They didn't let him go to college.
Jesus Christ.
What?
Knock it off.
He only ended up shooting a teacher and two kids,
but he missed a bunch of them.
Oh, my God.
Amir looks like he's hosting the Joe Rogan podcast.
This is truly insane.
Let's talk about it.
You're saying the most insane shit
and you literally just asked for this to be recorded.
You're like, do a video.
As a video.
And then I'm going to make jokes about school shooting.
As a goo.
You look like you should be talking about new tropics.
Instead, I'm talking about real shit.
So anyway, I was in this show
and i had to learn how to play sax because my character played saxophone just uh uh that's
and because he came back from the dead and that's how he proved to his friend that he was who he
was said he was he's like because only that guy could play saxophone like that so you had to play
it really well that's right that's gonna be important so uh dress rehearsal day which is
when we perform
in front of all of the the fuck the lower school the little tykes little fuckers right and uh
the reed is bone dry the reed is bone dry because i've been every scene so i can't go and wet it
yeah beforehand you don't have you you do not want to put it in a thing of water we learned
that from the dress rehearsal marika so i put it out and I'm like doing the thing and it's just.
And then the next line, we both broke.
And then the next line is, it's like it's coming from the dead.
Everybody was laughing for like two minutes.
My director was so upset.
So wait, you know how to play?
You know how to play the saxophone pretty well or not?
I knew how to play that one lick. And even saxophone pretty well or no i knew how to play
that one lick and even that i couldn't do very well i hear any hidden talents i can roll my
stomach but it's not really a musical you're not musical yeah i took guitar lessons around the
same age like the sixth seventh eighth grade so like i still know how to play chords but
i never i don't have a guitar yeah i, I didn't take lessons, but I picked up guitar and I only remember how to play chords and also don't have a guitar.
So I understand.
Yeah, but at least you're joyful about it.
I played the triangle.
At a funeral.
This is a mirror on a bumble date.
I played the saxophone at my grandmother's funeral. This is Amir on a bumble date. I played the saxophone at my grandmother's funeral.
All right, let's next topic.
Go, Marika, pause.
Go get the horn.
Marika, get your horn.
Please, you have to improvise.
Will you play the funeral?
Dirge.
There's only one saxophone song. I don't remember what I played. There's only one saxophone song.
I don't remember what I played.
There's only one song and it's the one that goes.
Careless Whipsper?
Oh, wait, no.
What's that?
That's not a saxophone song.
It is.
It's the one sax song.
Yeah.
Marika, I was thinking at the end of the episode.
I was thinking Marika could play that hot sax
end of the night.
Yeah.
So she plays us out.
It would be so bad.
The worse it is, the funnier the content.
Marika, wet your reed now.
And wet our appetites.
Just so we don't have a dry reed situation.
Yeah.
Do I have to?
What's a reed?
Is that like the thing you blow into
that attaches to the sax?
So you have a mouthpiece.
I can't believe you're talking to three different saxophone players right now.
You could really ask us anything you want.
Yeah, I did.
I asked you what's a reed, and you haven't answered it yet.
So Jake, what's a reed?
Nothing is up limits.
Nothing is up limits.
I know, yeah.
Rika's going to field the reed question.
If you want to ask me about music or notes
or how to clean the fucking fucking uh opening yeah part the
tube part tube yeah yeah i'll wax jazzical on that i'll wax dixieland um the reed so you have
a mouthpiece that's like generally plastic and the reed is a piece of wood that goes
like that sits on the mouthpiece
and then when you blow
it vibrates and that's what makes the sound
and it's all amplified through
sorry Marika if you're down it's all
amplified through the
tube Jake which is the
piece that got stuck in your ass
in fifth grade was that the reed or the plastic
part because you said you had that
situation where you said you tried to blow the saxophone with your ass and the i forget if it was the reed but no
it wasn't reed it was a different word what's would you say the plastic part was called reed
it was behind jake sphincter i never put a sax in my ass in grade school okay it was in high school that didn't happen it was in college it was when i was
pledging a frat i said to hell with sax and i put it in my axe kiss my sass
holy shit it's beautiful the reed is wet the day is right
jake twerking The reed is wet. The day is right.
Jake twerking.
Careless whisper. You're not purging a frat.
You didn't get a bit anywhere.
Everybody give one word to describe your week.
For me, it is lethargic.
You hate to hear that.
I haven't worked out for eight days, which is, I was doing pretty well.
I was having the exact same problem, and then I got a kettlebell.
What I wanted to do was get the adjustable dumbbell set, but they're like $800.
They're very expensive, and everybody knows it.
Everybody knows that we're all looking for them.
Yeah. I bought a kettlebell on eBay for $800. They're very expensive. And everybody knows it. Everybody knows that we're all looking for them. Yeah.
I bought a kettlebell on eBay for $125.
Whoa.
How heavy is that?
One or a set?
How many?
Just one.
Just one.
How many pounds?
Pretty easy.
Relax.
No, because I thought about this for a very long time.
I was going to get it between 25 and 35 but it felt like 30 i ended up
going with 25 and it's because i thought 35 was too heavy and i regret not going with 30 i'm
surprised it was that expensive for i mean i guess ebay so the retail is not that expensive at all
but like i went to dicks i went to wal Walmart I went to the other one, Target
There was no kettlebells
They're not on Amazon
You had to buy it from this one guy on eBay
And he knows
So Jake
One word
Fucking
Swanging
Kettlebell swanging
My week can only be described as
swanging then you said kettlebell how is it swaying in another way um well on saturday i
um went to a bar that was doing like walk away whiskeys and i got kind of sloshed
oh i did see that you're the one where you make an old-fashioned at home yeah that's cool so yeah um so i was sort of i mean like doing as much kind of like partying uh letting loose as covid
would allow uh a walk-in cocktail that was cool with anyone or um i did that solo dolo um i was
gonna do it with jill but she'd want to hang out with me yeah so i did it on the dolo you got drunk
by herself and bought a kettlebell. Micah not around.
Micah's around.
Micah's around.
So it's swaying and Micah's around,
but not to see me.
He's available,
but not for,
we don't hang out.
Oh,
he's FaceTiming me.
Cause I guess he's,
I'll talk to him later.
Really?
Yeah.
Well,
no,
pick it up and then put the phone towards the camera. I don't want him to know that we're talking to each other.
I feel weird. He hasn't responded to me. I know. I to each other. Say hello, because I haven't. I feel weird.
He hasn't responded to me.
I know, I know.
I just, I'll talk to him later.
I feel weird too, because I haven't talked to my brother in a month.
I don't feel weird.
My wife's gone.
I don't know where she is.
Mariko, what's your word of the week?
Wow.
Swanging.
Word of the week.
Don't take swanging.
Word of the week.
Because I already got swanging.
Nice.
Yeah.
It's a little cut.
Who was not going to pick that one?
Can I say it was Cardi?
Like Cardi B?
As in Mario, not in Cardi B, but as in Mario Kart.
Oh, yeah.
We played a lot of Mario Kart.
Oh, yeah.
Marika's been getting drunk while we play recently, which is concerning.
Really?
Oh, my God.
You're drinking and karting?
Rum and Yoshi, she says.
Which is, I guess, a pun on rum and coke?
Hardly.
But only vaguely.
Mariko with a stretch pun.
Oh, rum and Yoshi.
Awful.
Have you ever been so high?
Sounds like a noodle dish.
You did a super mini turbo in yoshi's island can you
fucking imagine i got hit with a blue shell and i drank blue carousel from a rum shell
call me old-fashioned but i prefer dry bowser and a dry whiskey, dry bones and vermouth.
Exactly right.
No, but Marika,
you were telling me about
your grandfather's funeral, actually.
You played the oboe at that one.
Double read this time.
If you sold an oboe,
would it be like $10 or best offer?
So it'd be like ten dollars obo
for my obo well there's an e at the end so then what are you gonna do what
there's an e at the end of what offer i don't think so obviously really okay all right um
let's cut from the top until now that was your worst that was your worst joke and you made a school shooting reference
this episode.
Joke's on you because we're cutting this school shooting
episode and leaving yours right now.
So it'll be you though on that.
And actually,
Jake is cancelled for that.
We really didn't even have to call it back.
Or best offer.
You talk like an executive producer but you live
your life. My word? I guess a vagrant.
My word? My word.
Oh, my word.
You didn't even let Marika...
She said cardi.
Cardi.
And mine's oil.
Fuck you!
You absolute...
As in that I'm taking it greasy.
Oil? Yeah.
Sorry, oil as in you're taking it easy.
Taking it greasy.
As in greasy does it.
The weirdest part about all this is that up in the corner in Jeff's video, we can see Amir at his best.
I was tan.
I was cut.
You were peaking.
I was.
A Barry LaCroix in hand.
4% body fat.
And now I'm fatter, but I weigh less less if that makes sense you know what i mean like chubby in all the wrong places i have rice
as it were i have greasy rice weight and it's thin everywhere and shiny too slimy on the day and hard to touch. I'm slick. Yeah.
Bic.
I am very sad, but.
Holding a pencil.
Sell me this lead.
Slick.
Bic.
Nice.
Sell me this dongle.
Rongle?
Yes.
That's Randy and Dongle.
Anybody have a song of the week?
A song that's just an earworm, a ditty, a jingle.
Something that's been rocking your world in the free world.
Oh, I have one.
The L to the OG dropped on Spotify last week.
The official.
And I have listened to it. The song itself. How has it not been on Spotify last week. The official. And I have listened to it. The song itself.
How has it not been on Spotify before?
Is this the first time?
Squiggle had the rights.
Squiggle did have the rights.
But it's clear that Jeremy Strong
recorded part of it in his home.
It's not the track from the show.
It is a new recording.
Oh my God. It's incredible. Damn. A lot of choices made. It's good. home like it's not the track from the show it is a new recording oh my god incredible damn
a lot of choices made it's good so i've listened to that like 20 times strong lives you think it's
marina del rey or williamsburg he lives in williamsburg uh yeah rad nick rad said that he
has seen him around wow wow why does nick see everybody he's a man about town. Nick's a star fucker. What?
He'll sleep with artists? He's a little social climber.
I love the guy, but I mean,
hell, he's only friends with me because I'm famous.
What the fuck are you talking about?
You're not famous.
What song did I, like, hold on.
Oh, I have a song.
I do have a song.
It's not really one that I've been playing.
Well, all right.
Here, I'll just tell you what it is.
Every time that Jill and I not get into a fight,
but we just sort of have like a little tension thing.
That's a fight.
Yeah, continue.
Yeah.
It's clearly a fight.
Well, not like a fight, but just sort of like.
Screaming contest.
Yeah, you're discussing things.
In a heated way.
I'm yelling at the top of my lungs, but she's not here.
So it's not really a fight because she's gone.
She's left.
You're fighting.
So it's not, how is it fighting?
Anyway.
Real quick.
You're just yelling in your apartment alone?'m so i'm yelling in my apartment alone but whenever
you so whenever you're doing that whenever you're feeling low you you play that song that goes
i think it's called little pretty one but it's really it's uh it's a real nice little uh uh
it's a bomb on a on a frayed situation attention when you're like
feeling really worked up and angry or like stressed out and then you just hear
yeah it's like don't worry be happy yeah it fixes everything for me who sings that song um
boy george although there's a cover by man george
alan jackson little bitty pretty one
wow
one hit wonder
or has he done
war
I think he did war
where it's like
war
yeah
we know the song
what is it
good towards
my five year plan
I wish
they all
could be
Minnesota girls open be Minnesota girls.
Open Minnesota.
Yeah, Minnesota girls by the Shackletons
is a song that I've been listening to a lot.
It's like a parody of California girls.
It's its own song,
but it does reference the Beach Boys.
This song was by Thurston Harris.
Not Alan Jackson.
Thurston Dirty Harris.
Battery Harris.
It's by Battery Harris.
Great bar.
It's near Battery Harris. It's near Battery Harris great bar it's near Battery Harris it's near Battery Harris
they played it at Battery Harris
Amir
song of the week
Savage
I believe
I don't even know who sings it
because it's this person
but featuring a bunch of people
I've been using it
in my Instagram stories
yeah
texting me parodies of Savage
who's the official artist
behind Savage
Megan Thee Stallion.
Really?
Yeah.
But it's featuring Beyonce?
The Savage remix features Beyonce.
Is this Megan Thee Stallion's first hit?
No, not at all.
What is she famous for?
Didn't she do Curvy Like Me or something?
I don't know about that one.
Didn't she do Tonight's the Night?
I also don't know that one.
Anyway.
Did she do Clubbing in the Club?
Right, so that's another song.
No, she did the one that was like,
well, it was like,
I'm clubbing in the club, club, club.
I'm clubbing in the crying in the club.
I'm clubbing in the crying in the club
by Megan Thee Stallion.
She also did You Broke My Heart,
so now I wrote this song about you.
You heard?
Marika, you know that one on sax, right?
Yeah.
You can cover that.
I'll cue that up.
Marika, here's your first TikTok.
So you go out to Fifth Avenue, and you just play something on sax.
And so it's Sax Fifth Avenue.
It's so far to drag a saxophone to.
Drag?
No, no one's even on the freeway.
There's a bridge.
I don't have a car.
Jake has a car.
Jake has a car. Jake has a car.
Yeah.
Yeah, I can pick you up.
I can figure it out.
As long as you get that.
You're the worst hand I've ever seen on a man.
It's taking up three quarters of your frame.
You're holding what appears to be a dog leash.
My little boy passed away.
I can't stand to drop it.
You're inside, but you keep Luke on a leash.
He's being muzzle trained.
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Marika, what are some things
that you specifically could make katsu?
So like, it doesn't have to be chicken.
Sorry, was that a question or a segment?
What's the segment called
if that's the first question?
The segment is Marika waxing katsu
on what could be a fried sandwich.
Sorry, Amir,
you obviously can't handle anything
that's not your segment.
No, because I said,
I said my word of the week was oil,
and now he's asking her about fried food it's clearly it clearly belongs to me i've been i'm
living a hashtag greasy lifestyle and you're asking marika about what could be deep fried
that doesn't make sense i'm a tin man well specifically what can i go first yeah the
question was posed to marika and amir interrupted, steamrolled, demanded the question belonged to him because he's the grease guy.
And now he's got me going at it.
Drinking straight gin.
No, I'm talking the most.
That was a bottle of Hendrix.
Marika, the floor is yours.
Inspired by a sandwich that I had when I was in LA last time, I would do eggplant.
I don't remember what restaurant it was, but I had a really good eggplant katsu sandwich
and it was like very neat
and all of the edges were cut off
of the bread in a really cute way
it was very good
you got that the morning after the head gum party
I did
I really went ham
I went by myself to get brunch
and I got a coffee
I got a croissant to go and an eggplant catseed sandwich at 9 a.m.
Wow.
Meanwhile, me and my brother were hungover, sleeping together in a double bed.
Where, oh my God, that was the night that we drunk ordered Postmates and then fell asleep before the guy got there.
Yeah. And it was like on the porch the next day. Yeah. ordered Postmates and then fell asleep before the guy got there.
Yeah.
And it was like on the porch the next day.
Yeah.
I should say, I did not do this.
I went to bed.
We like tried to go to a place to get food after the party and everywhere was closed.
Everywhere was closed.
Then you were like, I'm going to go to bed. And me and Micah were like, we're going to order McDonald's and watch 300.
And then it turned out that we actually started 300, but also went to bed.
It turns out we just got our McDonald's.
We ended up watching McDonald's and ordering 300 chicken quarter pounders with cheese.
I'm really bummed that we're not going to get to do the five-year anniversary, right?
I thought we are.
Yeah, you made a Slack group for it.
That made me sad.
No HeadGum Live, no five-year anniversary, we're closing the LA office.
What else is new?
I think I'm the most sad.
Oh, that's a fun segment, if you don't mind me bogarting that idea.
Please, Humphrey away.
Humphrey away.
Which of these three things about the company makes you the most sad?
Okay.
We're leaving the LA office.
HeadGum Live is not happening.
Or the five-year anniversary party that we get to hang out with all of the podcasters at HeadGum is off.
Can I do it?
That really depressed me.
Can I do a fourth?
Just teeing up that segment made me a little sad.
All right, go ahead.
I'll add a fourth option
because I think there's something that's sadder
than any of those three things put together.
If you say something about like 100,000 people are dead
or something, that's going to be like really fucked up
because that's not fair to me.
It's actually sadder than that.
You can imagine.
And I would never say that.
I would never admit to that.
And I don't think we should even keep this in,
but I really think this is sadder than the death toll.
Stop saying we shouldn't keep this in.
You've said that in the past three episodes.
I will never have lunch at OMSB again again and don't even like let don't don't
interrupt don't laugh let me get through the full story about what this institution you shut up for
a minute you shut up for one because i haven't done i let fucking marika talk about her eggplant
parm for fucking breakfast let me get through half a sentence before you cut me off
so
for those who don't know
well you explain
so for lunch
we would often decide
where to eat that seems like a normal
office thing
one second
I'm not even done yet
they're flying flags at half mast for what?
For Omsby?
Omsby served.
What are those rounded triangle rice patties with tuna in the middle?
That cost $4.75 called.
I think they're called like Omasabi.
I'm fucking crying.
Or Onigiri. That's right. I think that's the funniest thing you've ever
said
I would prefer to eat my
lunches there I really would have to
I would like to have these onigiri
and they were
they were very puffy and
rice forward
I guess in a way
overpriced
it was like 75% rice
and then it was like 20% mayo
and then 5% raw fish
they were overpriced
very little in the middle it was mostly rice
but under riced I would say
all rice
and I would get a two item combo
with a soup for $14
every day that I would go.
And everybody loved hating on OMSB except for me.
One day OMSB closed.
Obviously, they couldn't afford it.
It was a prime location.
They would sell four triangles a day and try to hawk other wares at a certain point.
They were selling $90 pillows that nobody was touching.
Sounds like somebody else we know.
OMSB closes down, but I assume they'll be back soon.
OMSB closed down way before the pandemic. This isn't something we lost because of coronavirus. I know, but I assume they'll be back soon. Omsby closed down way before the pandemic.
This isn't something that we lost because of coronavirus.
I know, but I feel like now they're never going to come back.
Their business model was to make...
And even if they do, I'm afraid I won't be able to have lunch at Omsby again.
So yeah, I mean, it's a bummer that the party won't happen.
You think that they're going to come back after the pandemic
when you still can't go to a restaurant yeah they'll
probably have 30 capacity social distance you can eat the almost when they were already at 30
yeah but i'm saying i can have the misu through the mask through a straw sorry your fear is that
this restaurant that failed before the pandemic is going to come back after the pandemic when other better restaurants are failing.
And then your fear is that you won't be able to enjoy the miso except through a straw.
Well, it's not a fear.
Just you asked me what the saddest part of the summer was.
And yeah, it's kind of shitty that we won't have a, what was it, party, HeadGum Live or leaving the office.
Those are all like not ideal.
Hedgum Live or the leaving the office those are all like not ideal but for me not to have Omsby again is a real game slash soul changer um so that's what I would say you can't drink
miso but you're mad about a restaurant that specialized in onigiri closing you can get
miso anywhere to drink through a straw if you really want it could but it will never be at omsby and we will never right we'll never have a lunch break near there
maybe ever again i thought omsby was fine and pretty good even i liked omsby fine i think there
was there was a war between the la people because marty really hated it you loved it other people
had strong opinions i would fly in there every once
in a while i liked omsby just so you know thanks man that uh that that fucking means a lot it really
does coming i know because i wish it didn't that's almost i wish it didn't because i can sit here and
rant and rave about omsby but for whatever reason my voice doesn't carry weight in this place i'm
not a tastemaker like you so i feel like if between us two and jeffrey
what do you think about a simple thank you would suffice let's just say thank you stop crying jeff
where did you land on that spectrum between marty and me with regards to w slash r slash t
omsby i think you loved it right it was halfway in between i didn't love it i didn't hate it
it was neutral it was net neutral it was rice it was fish It was halfway in between. I didn't love it. I didn't hate it. It was neutral. It was net neutral.
It was rice.
It was fish.
It was mayonnaise.
In a triangle, like you said, in a ball.
It was a pyramid with seaweed strips, right?
The miso was lukewarm, and Luke was there, and he was in harm's way, which doesn't rhyme
with warm, but it's one letter off.
And did I mention the yellowtail sashimi
was a mayonnaise salad yeah i guess you mentioned that towards the end there's actually a photo of
all of us at omsby and i was i look devastated and it's a genuine reaction because the rice balls
are so covered in egg sauce there's barely any fish.
The ratio is off. That's my only complaint.
I would love a rice ball with a 30-30
ratio. Alright, here's another game.
Well, no one even answered
your question and it was a good question.
Marika, what are you most sad about between
those three options? Don't include the fourth.
Yeah, well, I've never been to OMSB.
You've never been to OMSB?
I never went. And that's fine for me. Yeah, that's I've never been to OMSP, so I can't. You've never been to OMSP? Well, I never went, and that's fine for me.
Yeah, that's good.
I think I'm most upset about HeadGum Live.
Yeah, I'm most upset about HeadGum Live.
So that's the thing that I work on, and last year was really fun.
I feel like we hit a good place with that event
and it was a great time
had by all so bummed we
can't do it again. Jake's laughing
at me. I'm laughing
because I'm so sad. I'm like
laughing because I regret
pitching this as a segment so
much. I'm like yeah this is making me
so sad. Between the OMSB and the
live show. Chicago. Yeah. That was so much fun are you more so much but you're still thinking about you're still
thinking about omsby are you sadder about omsby or the show jake no jake i'm wondering where he
lands did you do you say option two or four i feel like you you're looking at me like an ally
because i said i liked omsby. Omsby, you said?
You want something from me that I can't give you.
All right, so Jake's an Omsby man.
So, Jeff, you're sort of the tie-breaking vote.
What do you think you're the saddest about?
Jeff, what are you most sad about?
Omsby or something else?
I kind of want to give a real answer because it's a lot of three sad things.
I would say in practice, I'm most sad about not having a HeadGum Live because, yeah, last year was the GOAT.
Also, I'm single now, so that would have been fun.
But also, I would say in theory, I'm most sad about the LA office closing because I feel like we'll never be able to give it a proper send-off.
And that's been the entirety of my adult working life.
My first internship ever was at HeadGum.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah.
A lot of good memories.
But it's all on film, basically, so that's fine.
That's right.
Yeah, the LA office will live on in footage and in photos.
But I didn't even think about not being able to give it the proper send-off.
Yeah.
That makes me sad.
That makes me mad as someone that has lived through uh now
on my fourth head gum office you'll get over it you know what marika that's almost enough out of
marika all right play the sax if you said that to me about omsby i would have lost my shit
you know what it is though is that the the silver lining in all of this and let me just sort of make
a meal out of it um please do that's a negative way to phrase it you could say you could talk
about it and then if you if you go on for too long i'll say you made a meal out of it don't
say that you'll make a meal out of it. Let me drag this out for a spell.
Yeah, don't.
Can I vamp on this?
Well, we're a podcast company.
Like, yeah, we do the videos, we do the whatever,
but that's all secondary to the audio.
That was the worst office you guys could have chosen for audio.
Why, because it was in a trucking lane?
It's a loading dock, yeah.
There's commercial trucks driving by hither and thither, and then there's
a bunch of startups that just moved in that just
blast music. So, like, we'll be trying to
record, or, you know, this is four months
ago, but, and then you just hear
and it's just people packing
stuff. It's a shipping company next door.
Yeah. Yeah, but they like to blast their tunes.
So I am looking forward to a quieter office.
Yeah. Hopefully in Frogtown yeah you keep you keep ideally uh begging me for a frog town location
but i mean it's not entirely up right by wax paper yeah that'd be great although what do you mean
it's not entirely up to you there's like it actually kind of is between marty me and uh
claire who works out of our la office cohen we're all going to sort of weigh in and decide together which location is closest
to where the next OMSB will be,
and then we'll take it from there.
There will never be another OMSB.
That's the right answer.
And that's a good thing.
I haven't had ramen in a year.
They didn't have that.
I know.
I'm just changing topics a little bit.
I haven't had ramen since the quarantine marika
i think you should play us out it's time i don't have nothing's ready we'll wait
and ferris won't edit this pause i mean we should talk about at least one more thing because i do
have to wet the reed no i think we'll i think we'll sit here in silence as you wet the reed and we'll
leave all of it in feel free to like point the audio device you're using at the wet and so then
we just kind of hear i'm having an aneurysm looking at marika's screen sort of shift shift shape and
colored strobe half chris evans half just i think of are you sitting on a beanbag you wearing culottes
uh yes and i am sitting on my floor in front of my bed oh it has a very poofy uh duvet it looks
very comfortable it is it's from snow highly recommend that's eric snow's company who that one was for amir thank you got it
tracked it this is this is gonna i mean we should talk about something else
it's fine no nothing i've already said i've already spoken my piece a pro tip when trying
to wet your reed for any sax players out there especially experienced people just kind of
salivate well yeah yeah okay you get it no you why was your why was your tip for experienced sax players on how to do the
most basically i don't want to give tips to a jake or a jeff where it's like oh they're not
taking it seriously i want to give tips to people who are going to be playing radio city okay you
think that they don't know how to wet this isn't about me it's about marika it's about her wetting
the reed you made it about you
when you said that you had advice for
people who were playing Radio City.
You're right, it's not
supposed to be about you, but you said
I actually have advice for professional
saxophone players.
Why am I always the villain at the end of this shit?
Amir talked
to Ed Almsby for 13 minutes.
You really did.
You derailed the show. And it should have been
10 times more. I feel like
every time I look at Amir's quadrant
there's something in his
eyes that is like, I'm about to talk
about Omsby. I was just going to mention that
you could do half brown, half
white rice, which is a
kind of a... Yeah, that's true.
It's a nice take on a modern classic.
That's awful.
Why is that awful?
A brown rice with raw fish and mostly mayonnaise sounds disgusting.
Why more disgusting than white rice with fish and mayonnaise?
Brown rice is like a different, like a chewy texture.
It's like nuttier.
It feels bad to think about.
It's nuttier?
I mean, it's a different type of rice.
It's got a different taste, a different flavor profile and consistency.
But I wouldn't say I'm so disgusted, you know?
I think it's fine.
It's like filling up the remnants
of a juice cup with water some people are grossed out by that oh god yeah when you do that that's
fucking foul yeah why is that anyway that's fine to me i'd do that yeah so marika thinks brown white rice
my really dumb cousin
is on the
mic I'm really sorry about that guys
he's four
was that to the tune of brown eyed girl
so instead of brown eyed girl
it's brown white rice
brown white rice
do you remember
when we used to eat OMSB?
We used to rice.
By Ham Morrison.
Why Ham Morrison? We're talking about fish.
I'm saying they could have expanded.
They?
OMSB.
We.
You're now looking at the new CLO of OMSB.
That's right, the Chief Language Officer.
I'm in charge of translating the whole frickin' menu.
I'm the C-R-O, Chief Rice Officer.
I bought the IP to OMSB.
Meaning?
I can open the next OMSB.
They also sell jars of dry rice for $20 a pot.
You'd have to talk to the C.O.R. about that.
What's that?
The cheap operating rice.
It looks like you're dabbing Chris Evans' face like he has sauce on his beard.
It really does.
You would do that for a minute.
It's a, what is this, cork grease?
Applicable to you, Amir.
Oh, my word of the week
so you're saying you haven't played Saxon
however long
and you have cork grease
well before I played it
for this thing
it was like
you know what maybe we should do it we're out of time
honestly
seeing you set up I think was more than enough
awesome thank you guys so much you set up i think was more than enough um
awesome thank you guys so much wait until her weed was red subscribe but don't necessarily rate
and uh yeah why you need the rates help with the algorithm leave a review on the omsby yelp
what is the omsby yelp that's what i want to see right now. Closed beyond recognition. Ever wanted rice to be marinated in ice?
No.
Really?
Four stars.
Four stars, 76 reviews.
I'm surprised a restaurant like that
would close.
We've talked about
Om's feet for so long.
All right, all right.
It's time to wrap it up.
Thank you guys so much
for joining us
for episode three
of the HeadGum Podcast
featuring Marika Brownlee,
Jake Hurwitz,
and myself.
Shout out to... Amir was here too. amir was here oh sorry yeah and amir um you barely said it cut that out uh what do you mean
ferris cut that out we hope you guys have a good time again take it from the top because you didn't
get it clean i was right you know what my voice was kind of gravely i'll do it hey thank you so
much for listening to this episode of the podcast shoutooking Podcast. Shout out Marika Brownlee.
Shout out Jay Kerowitz.
Shout out myself.
Shout out Faris.
Shout out Marty.
Shout out Claire.
Shout out Brad.
Shout out Andrew Pyle.
Big up to Nick.
I mean, you're right.
Amir Cohen.
Shout out Amir Cohen.
Rose for doing the intro.
Riley, obviously.
Riley's not here.
Luke.
Riley's not here.
And all of you guys.
Puppy Luke.
And all of you guys.
Luke, obviously Luke.
Abital, Jill.
I want to know why you're
not saying my name actually i understand the bit but i really want to know why it's happening
luke's ears like rose as he spoke you said that like it was like an oscar bait movie trailer
i want to know why you're not saying my name holding a gun to the dog um i found a review
for omsby that is it's this is really small but it just makes no sense to me it's like this review
says the ambiance is the most aesthetically pleasing places i've been to in la the omsby
the service service the workers were really sweet.
Parking.
My friend and I were easily able to find parking.
There's free Wi-Fi.
And there's,
the review is one star.
This is insane.
You like.
Because the food is bad.
You guys should do,
you guys should do Alms Beyond.
She even says the food is only okay.
She said it was disappointing.
Next time you come on Review Review,
we'll do Alms Beyond.
Thank you. It makes no sense to list all of these things that are like star okay. She said it was disappointing. Yeah, I mean, next time you come on Review Review, we'll do OMSB. Thank you.
It makes no sense to list all of these things that are, like, star-worthy and then give it one star.
Yeah, so why don't you do a podcast about that?
Thank you guys so much for listening.
Feel free to continue to DM myself.
And then also, we set up an email, hgpod at headgum.com.
Send us anything that you want us to talk about segment ideas
you know locations or commercial real estate
for OMSB 2.0
I'm interested in that
Frogtown style
Jake what's your social do you have anything to plug
my social like my social
security or like my like
yeah your social security
oh I was just well if it was like Instagram or Twitter
it's just at I was gonna say like my name but if you wanted the social my number i don't know if i want to share that but it's i'll give
you the first i'll fuck it the first three five eight one and then okay just give the last five
then uh five eight one uh four three eight one nine okay and then the last one just the last i
feel like i'm gonna i'm in danger of giving the full number out yeah i mean i just typed out a uh an iphone note that says say my
name prick say my name say my name when no one is an almsby say baby i'll eat rice why are you not
eating rice um and now on instagram i don't know what else to say. I really am. I swear to fucking God. Baby, why are you not eating rice?
You got two voice cracks in there.
There has to be a reason why you're not eating rice.
Say my rice, say my rice.
When no one is in Omsby, say we'll eat at Omsby.
You'll be eating rice.
Now let's hear the saxophone
the fuck was that
seriously play something
it's the funniest instrument
to be okay at
like if you're bad it's not fun
if you're good it's not fun
is that a shofar?
I don't want to do this for a full minute
Give us a stinger
Oh god
It was perfect.
Bye, everybody.
What a way to go.
Later.
Later.
That was a HeadGum Podcast.