The Hilary Silver Podcast - 5 Daily Habits To Be My Best Self

Episode Date: March 14, 2025

Being your best self sounds great, but what does that actually mean? In this episode, Hilary calls out the vague, feel-good self-help fluff and lays out five daily habits that actually move the needle. If you’ve been winging personal growth and hoping for the best, it’s time to get intentional. Hilary breaks down how to define your ideal self, bridge the gap between who you are now and who you want to be, and make small shifts that add up to massive transformation. Plus, she’s sharing the one magic question that will help you make better decisions, stay aligned, and step into your power every day.   Episode Highlights: Why your ideal self isn’t a finish line—it’s a way of being The power of sacred morning time (no chaos, no distractions—just you) How movement, music, and self-check-ins shape your energy and mindset The one magic question that will keep you aligned and making better choices   Episode Breakdown: [00:00] Being Your Best Self [05:04] Habit 1 [06:00] Habit 2 [08:08] Habit 3 [10:08] Habit 4 [11:55] Habit 5 [13:20] The Magic Question   🔥 Ready to embody your best self? Let’s make it happen. 🎧 Listen now & start the shift! 💫 Get my curated playlist: hilarysilver.com/playlist 📲 Follow me on Instagram: @hilarysilver 🎥 Watch my Five Core Concepts of the Self-Centered Movement playlist: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL0RHQvSfQrdhYziTx1PqymciC0EQLC9cl 💬 Comment below: What’s one habit that helps you show up as your best self?

Everyone talks about being your best self, and we take for granted that we actually know what that means, because it can be a pretty vague concept if you think about it. If you value personal growth and self-development, but you've never really examined, explored, or defined what it means to be your best self, then this episode is for you. Today, I'm sharing five daily habits that help me connect with myself and help me be the best version of myself and how to get clear what your ideal self looks like.

And make sure to stick around until the end because I'm giving you one powerful magic question to ask yourself that will always guide you and give you the answers that you need. So let's dive in. Hi, it's Hillary. Welcome to the Hillary Silver podcast. Thanks for tuning into the conversation today. If you haven't already, it would mean so much to me. If you'd take a minute to just click that five star rating on your podcast app, leave a review and subscribe so you never miss one of my episodes. And if you're enjoying this podcast, please consider sharing it with a friend because if you like it, they will probably like it too.

Personal growth isn't some esoteric thing. It's simply about being intentional. So let's make it really practical today. Personal growth is about being aware of who you are right now, your current self, your real self, how you feel, what you think and believe, how you act and behave, the choices that you make, and how you operate in your life, how you move through the world. And then acknowledging that there is a more ideal version of you that you would like to be. And the growth is about intentionally working towards narrowing the space between those two versions of you. Makes sense, right?

So let's define your ideal self. This is a version of you that is more evolved in all the ways that you would like to be, areas of your current real self that may struggle or feel undeveloped. So, for example, an ideal self may be more emotionally mature, or patient, or vulnerable. Or your ideal self might be less anxious, or reactive, or impulsive, or guarded. So it all starts with getting very honest with yourself about what it is about you and how you are now that isn't working

for you or is holding you back in some way. You won't really allow yourself to be honest if you're going to condemn yourself or judge yourself or fall into shame. So monitor that. This is just about gentle, radical honesty. What things about you could use a little help, need a little growing. So your ideal you is what you look like if all that stuff is no longer there. It just disappeared or resolved or it's no longer a thing, it's not bothering you, it's better. Imagine

how that would feel if you could live that life as that person. Seems amazing, right? But here's the thing I really want you to understand about this so it doesn't feel overwhelming or exhausting or daunting or like a never ending chore. Your ideal self is not a destination that you try to reach and then once you get there, you just sit back and relax.

Your ideal self is like the horizon. You never actually arrive. When you are walking and you see the horizon line in the distance, even if you keep walking towards it, you never really actually reach the line. It keeps moving as you do, right? So accept that right now. You will never achieve a state of being your ideal self. You will have moments where you get to experience being that person, that version of you.

But that is all. So let that take the pressure off. The goal isn't to be this perfect version of you. Ideal is just that. It's an ideal. And knowing that going in is the best way to embrace personal growth so you don't feel defeated and throw in the towel and beat yourself up when you mess up. You just do your best and inherent in that is messing up and falling short. That's just the human way. When you're clear about what that ideal version of you looks like and feels like and acts like way out there on the horizon, then being your best self is the you along the way doing your best to achieve that ideal. This is a very important distinction to make in your mind to help you with all of this. Your ideal is what you are seeking to achieve.

Your best is who you are along the way, trying to achieve it. So now I'm gonna share the five habits that help me connect to my ideal self every day so I can do my best to be my best every day. First, I wake up early every day. You remember the proverb, early to bed, early to rise, makes a woman healthy, wealthy, and wise?

It is 100% true. I wake up early not because I have to, but because I get to. That very first time in the morning when it's quiet, I get to enjoy my own company, being with myself. It's a sacred time for me to be with me just as me, not Hillary the wife or the mom or the CEO, just me. No one needs anything from me and I don't have to do anything.

If you're rushing into your day, you're starting from a place of chaos. Give yourself the gift of starting with this quiet time and watch how much calmer and more centered you feel throughout the day. My next habit is about what I'm doing in this quiet time, which is the best time that you'll spend every day if you learn to do this too. I check in with myself. How am I feeling right now? Who am I right now? What's going on with me? Being fully present and engaged with myself. I do this just like I would

if I sat down with a friend I've not seen in a while with someone that I really care about and I'm deeply interested in. Think about it. Do you ever really give yourself that kind of undivided attention and devotion? Are you so curious with yourself as you are with a bestie or a long lost friend? Doing this helps me feel seen and heard and valued and important by me. All the things that we deeply desire to feel, but we often place the onus on others to do for us. It's nice to have relationships in our lives that can provide this kind of witnessing, but we must do this for ourselves first. This is how to begin being self-centered.

Self-centered. The second part of this process is getting myself into the emotional state I want to be in right now and then it sets me up for the whole rest of the day. I decide who I'm going to be today, what I'm gonna focus on, what thoughts I'm going to entertain, and how I'm going to show up. This process is way more effective than traditional meditation. It's less passive and accepting of what is, and instead more consciously intentionally directing my thoughts and my state of being into what I choose for myself.

Your emotional state sets the tone for everything, so you get to choose this on purpose. If what I've been describing sounds good to you, it's a tiny piece of what is in the daily journal, my complete morning ritual. I will put the link in the show notes just in case you want to check it out. The third habit is to work out every day. I know some of you who've been listening to me for a while know I do this and I talk about it all the time. I work out every day right after this quiet time in the morning. The key here is that I'm not just grinding it out, sweating it out, or doing time at the gym because I have to burn calories. What makes this

different is that it's about being present with myself physically, being aware of my movements, being in my body and noticing, being attuned and physically connected to my physicality. Kinesthetic intelligence is the ability to use your body effectively to express yourself, to solve problems or create something. So people with high bodily kinesthetic intelligence are skilled at coordinating their mind and their body, kind of like athletes or dancers, or even the fine motor skills that artists and surgeons have. So for me, being in my body during workouts

is feeling the clothes on my skin, moving with intention, experiencing the embodiment and self-awareness through movement. Sometimes I'm lifting weights, but it's not just a mindless motion that I'm counting and I can't wait to be finished with. It's a thoughtful motion. Sometimes it's a long walk,

and sometimes it's a Tracy Anderson routine, which I love for this because it's like a guided physical meditation. It's a dance. Whatever I'm doing, it is a fully sensual experience for me. These morning workouts for me are a part of why I'm in such great shape. But I love it. And I look

forward to it because of the connection to myself that I get to experience every morning. It's being self conscious in the best possible way. I'm fully grounded, present, and connected to myself. Your body is the vessel, so honor it. Okay, two more daily habits, and then I'm gonna share that powerful magical question that you can start asking yourself. This next part of my daily habit

is selecting my music very intentionally. I know it sounds silly to talk about music as a habit, but it is. Every single day, music is a part of my life. Music has the power to shift our emotional state. I choose the music each day that helps me feel how I want to feel. And here is what this does for me specifically. During the day, like all of us, there is so much to do. Family, kids, business, and the chaos of life. It's easy to be in task mode, to do mode, get shit done mode, being on the go all day. I'm in a highly functioning productive zone all day long,

which is great for accomplishing things, but it's a very masculine energy and without intentionally shifting out of it can lead to burnout and lack of balance and harmony. So for me personally, I select music that takes me to an internal place where I'm connecting with and experiencing my feminine self. So like I said, my workouts are a completely sensual experience for me, and the music is in part what helps me get there.

I love starting out each day, putting myself into this state of being deeply feminine and sensual and strong and abundantly powerful. Remember, being your best self is the you who is actively working on becoming your ideal. And this helps me be my best self, which is holding both the masculine and the feminine energy. So music is very subjective and personal, but I'm sharing my highly curated Spotify playlist with you. If you want to check it out, go to hillarysilver.com forward slash playlist

and I'll send you the link. So the last daily habit for me in being my best self is to hold myself accountable all day, every day. I don't just check in in the morning and then call it good. I stay present with myself throughout the day. This doesn't mean that I'm perfect and that I never mess up because believe me, I do. But I'm conscious and I'm aware of how I'm feeling so I can choose my actions or behaviors

intentionally. If I need a moment to process it and figure it out, I pause and give myself that time to check in. Never underestimate the power of the pause. This helps me navigate being the person that I want to be. I am being my best self because I'm keeping my eye on the horizon, which is again, as you remember, that's my ideal. And then I'm actively working towards it each day moment to moment.

I'm accountable to myself. At the end of the day, I'm the one I have to answer to. Did I show up my best self? Did I live my values? Did I honor my boundaries? Did I live in alignment with who I think and say I want to be? Did I handle myself in a way that I can be proud of, in ways that my ideal self would be proud of? When my head hits that pillow every night, I want to sleep peacefully knowing that I did. So many people are living for external validation. I'm living for mine and that's what I want for you as well. So here's the magic question that I promised you. When you're trying to figure out how to handle something, you're not sure what to do in a situation or what to say to someone.

Things like that come up every day in life, okay, at home, at work, or in the community. Rather than seek outside counsel from a friend or a family member or even keeping a therapist around to have us a sounding board, a truly self-centered person knows that she has the answers inside of her already, and you do. The question to start asking yourself is this, what would my ideal self do right now? How is my ideal self going to respond or handle this? It puts you in the mind of the ideal version of you so you can answer the question for yourself. If you are truly your ideal right now,

how would you handle this? What would you do or say right now? This question has helped me grow so much and I know it will do the same for you. So give it a try along with all of these other daily habits and let me know how it goes. And if you want my playlist, don't forget to go to hillarysilver.com forward slash playlist

and I'll send it to you. I'll also put the link in the show notes. Thanks for listening and I'll see you next time.