The Hoely Hour - Big Boy

Episode Date: January 16, 2026

Amelia creates a fake scenario for Liz to get mad about and people are addicted to porn at a shocking level. What’s worse: someone calling your boyfriend “good boy” or “daddy”? It’s a house divided, and may be the first thing we've disagreed on in years. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

I think things are going to get better because Ariana is a brunette again. I know. I do think that that's a good sign. That feels like a good sign. Yeah, I agree. hey we're at our place today our place Liz lives here now yeah no we're at my place today you could it's big enough that's true it's too big we were talking about that recently it's too much space in a very large it's too much space I never thought that I would say that but because I

love having a lot of space but it's a lot of space to keep clean yeah that's I can hardly keep our two our two bedroom clean it is a constant struggle it's a lot and i'm like being an adult fucking sucks it's i think it sucks it sucks it's such a fucking scam it is like and i remember adults were always like don't grow up too fast well i was also thinking about so i was talking to some of my co-workers about this yesterday like they were talking about the company culture and how it's like changed a lot since covid happened and i was thinking about it and i was like well when we worked together like we would always go out after work and stuff and like i i always attributed it to our age because we we were in our 20s yeah and

then you kind of outgrow that and then covid happened but i'm now that i'm thinking about it like people who are getting their first job and entering the workforce they're now entering the workforce where people aren't going out yeah anymore yes that's so true there's just kind of like they're like yeah the the company culture has changed so much and i'm like you you're hiring these young people who missed out on kind of these key developmental experiences in high school and college and now they're getting their first job and they like have and then they're like we need you to give a shit personally about the company like you haven't really fostered a culture not my job specifically but i mean like corporate jobs in general it's like we want the company

to have this very like close-knit culture like they used to but yeah i just don't think that if i don't think that's gonna exist again for a long time and if it ever does you know it's like even with our group of friends from work like i saw a handful of them that we used to go out with a lot the day before thanksgiving and even then i was like i want to go home you know like i mean i had to leave early anyway because we were having people over the next day but like the whole time i was like i'm tired like it just doesn't hit the same after covid it doesn't it's really weird well i don't know if it doesn't hit the same for us because like i don't like being hung over no fuck that i i don't know i don't want to be inconvenienced by being hung over no it really

does fuck up a whole day yeah or like even if i'm not hung over like i still don't sleep as well when i drink yeah i'll wake up earlier yeah i can't fall back asleep because all of all the sugar yeah and i'm sure something else that i don't know because i'm not a scientist i always wake up in the middle of the night when i've been drinking and have a vasovagal syncope what's the girl is that no no it's like it's like a fancy word for passing out like losing consciousness but it's like a very specific feeling so what happened didn't that happen to you when you were on the toilet or is that someone else that was me when we and frank had food poisoning oh oh okay i didn't make that up what happens is i think it's your blood pressure drops while when like

while you're like it's like a blood pressure and blood sugar thing i don't i feel like i'm talking on my ass but you like kind of get tunnel vision and you get really really really hot and then you get this like hissing in your ear it's really strange and then you're really cold but you're still sweating it's the strangest body experience ever and the first time it happened after i'd been drinking i was like i'm dying for sure i was on my friend's couch i woke up in the middle of the night like i'd say me to a hospital you get that and i get cyclical vomiting yeah together we need to go to the hospital we are really a dream team and well and if you don't know what uh cyclical vomiting is it is when you start you know you throw up but then you start to get like so dehydrated

that you can't keep any liquids in you so no matter what like even if there's nothing in your body you're like dry heaving or you're throwing up bile and my um maybe tmi no i guess this isn't tma tmi but now my um enamel on my teeth is like fucked oh i believe it and they were trying like the the dental hygienist the last time i went to the dentist she was cleaning my teeth and she was like do you have acid reflux or like eat a lot of citrus and like asking me all these questions and I was like I know this is probably from my college days yeah throw up all the time yeah and then she was trying to very politely explain it to the dentist when the dentist is like checking everything before you go and the dentist is like what's going on with your enamel and then

she was like um some past habits that she doesn't participate anymore and then I was just like you know what I partied too hard in college I'm gonna get pretty sick with the hose you understand yeah I don't know now I'm like I would rather just have half a gummy and drink some champagne yeah I'm happy I love that I just like a glass or two of champagne I feel like my drinking now is like taking Adderall and like painting I mean yeah like let's get fucking focused fam let's get fucking focused hell yeah hell yeah I love that um I know what whatever works for you my my equivalent of that is eating a gummy and playing Hogwarts Legacy fuck yeah um a podcast I listen to i haven't kept up with it lately but it's called ride um i don't know if any other listen yeah

mary beth barone and benito skinner benny drama 7 um who i have a parasocial friendship with as do all of their fans and listeners but uh they whenever they refer to harry potter hogwarts they call it turf hogwarts that's that's appropriate in my head i can't like anytime i say i'm like i'm gonna play turf hogwarts that's so funny i like it sucks that jk rowling sucks so much because hogwarts legacy is such a fun game to play i mean you could still enjoy like the thing that came from her like that's separating the art from the artist yeah there are so many art from the artist like people still go to harry potter world and they're like not turfs well that's why the whole that's why they're making a show is because they need a new generation of fans yeah because they're

like okay we built these fucking theme parks yeah how are we gonna keep people interested that makes a lot of sense speaking of turf hogwarts what what house would you be in do you think you know here if a pair yeah i think you'd be in slytherin i would be i think you're like a slytherin sun ravenclaw rising oh thank you yeah wow yeah um i'm a hufflepuff like triple sign i think my big three is all i think you would definitely have some ravenclaw in there that's really nice of you to say yeah i think you'd have some ravenclaw and then i do think that you're resilient like a gryffindor but i don't think you're a headass like a gryffindor thank you you know yeah but i love that i you know what i was talking to my co-worker about this because

i found out she also played turf hogwarts oh but she gave up pretty early and i was like rookie no um i'm a level 29 witch yeah so kiss the ring yeah um uh but yeah we were talking about it and i was like anytime i would do what was it called potter world or whatever the website oh my god i forgot about that anytime i would do that little quiz to see what house i would be in because i've taken it like over the years um you know every once in a while you're like oh i wonder it's still the same I would get Gryffindor all the time and I wasn't like answering to try and be in Gryffindor and then the last within the last like five years I think I've done it two other times maybe but they were they were Slytherin both times yeah I probably did do it

within the last few years because I started reading Harry Potter fan fiction that makes sense and speaking of on that note I'm like I'm yearning to yearn again I think maybe I'm in I think maybe like this time of the year i start to feel very yearnful i was kind of over it for a little while i'm like okay let i'm i'm sick of reading about the romance i'm sick of reading about the love yeah maybe it's just because my period's over and now i'm entering my follicular phase maybe that does let's go follicular that is king yeah yeah but i i don't know i like seeing all the people talking online about heated rivalry i'm like you know what i'll buy it oh my god absolutely have you seen it no but i should we do it yes i i've been telling katie

i was like we're watching heated rivalry because one of the newsletters i subscribe to shout out garbage day i fucking love garbage day and i think everyone should read it because it is funny and also very topical they talk about like what's trending online but then they also cover politics pretty thoroughly um you get it to your email yes and i i pay for their newsletter but they also have like a lot of free articles that you can go back and read but uh they were saying in one of their more recent newsletters that um there's a hockey podcast that like does typical hockey coverage but now they've started watching heated rivalry and and recapping it the way that they would recap like a hockey game that's incredible which i think is so funny so i want

to watch it i think hockey players are really hot they are have you seen them stretch did i send you that video of them stretching yeah that was a kraken player i mean i well did i send you there was like a compilation oh i thought i sent you that you sent me the one of the kraken player though with like cuffing season over it or something it's cuffing season and that man is very it is very hot i mean they seem like they can like they can fuck you know oh yeah i'm 100 i kind of love when they're missing a tooth i like when they're missing a tooth because of physical altercations yeah like you got a little fight yeah oh you know what let's get our hockey players to fight ice that's actually

a great idea about that that is a great idea speaking of ice last week when we recorded was the day before renee good was shot by ice officers i don't even feel like we should call them that ice thugs yeah in minnesota fucking glorified hall monitors they're doing this because that fucking grifter ass youtuber was like i investigated the daycares and there's no one there or like but he he like then the people who were there like who worked in these businesses were like he did this in bad faith because he came to the offices he didn't go to the schools right and he also came after hours and he's like i didn't know i was there after hours i'm like it's fucking 5 p.m yeah what do you think it's not called nightcare yeah stupid ass and

people aren't gonna let you in to see kids that you don't fucking know yeah are you kidding me who was this guy i didn't even hear about that i can't remember his name but he's like started making a p he's the latest in the alt-right grift pipeline um great we needed more quickly coming in to replace charlie kirk because there is a chasm there has to be a backfill yeah they they're there's like yeah um but he like went to these minnesota daycares and like i think the thing that's most annoying is like this has also already been covered like this has been covered over the last like 10 years by different news sources and there's currently like before the stupid youtube video came out there was um already an fbi investigation into like child care fraud

this is the issue with vigilante justice is it it impedes on what like law like the law is doing even if they're moving slowly they can still fuck up investigations doing it this way i also think that it's worth mentioning like keeping in mind that a lot of these kind of like influencer content creators that cover political topics are being paid they're being paid by like either directly by the party or through like a dark money organization and dark money just means that you don't know where it's coming from and taylor lorenz covered this too and she like i like people took it's so personally because she mentioned um she did an investigation into a left-wing like dark money organization but they're essentially like dark maga like they're not

here to actually change policy like a lot of or not dark maga blue maga is what they called it sorry blue maga so like blue maga is just like establishment democrats who aren't actually trying to change the status quo like the types of establishment democrats who don't stand behind mom donnie like the ones who would do the same exact thing as republicans but just spin it a different way yeah um so they're like very often the ones funding allow me to drone on about what I was saying I got a nosebleed folks but we're back um yeah a lot of these like political groups are funding content creators who talk about politics and they're like limiting what they're allowed to say but at the same that's not I'm not necessarily saying like these content creators who

are taking money from dark money groups are doing anything bad right uh but and I think like creators should be paid for their work absolutely so i like that they're being paid but at the same time too it's like you have to question the ulterior motives of these groups if you if they're saying like oh you're not allowed to speak about um israel and gaza yeah like well oh why tana mojo said that the the rnc tried to pay her like thirty thousand dollars or something crazy yeah it's just like ever since she said that i'm like oh like i hadn't considered more common than people are realizing yeah yeah it's fucking crazy it's hard to find a truly independent news source you know what i really want to do is um crowdsource money to put up billboards um in cities that are

being overrun by ice right now yeah of just like making fun of them like these like pathetic puny little men that like want to feel important do you like to wear pants that are too small for you yeah did you peak in high school yeah you might be perfect for ice well i what i did i've been thinking about this all day i'm like i think we need to go dark woke like if you are unemployed right now and you need a job i think you should join ice and just like fuck up their shit absolutely like just be incompetent well they're already incompetent but i mean like just sit in your car and play belatro yeah or like take up the resources take their money take take their money yeah um take up their resources just like make things really complicated and like fuck up

paperwork like do shit to make it disorganized and then like refuse to do stuff be like i'm not doing that because it's illegal my and then if they fire you sue them yeah take the bonus check like just fucking do and dox these people yeah do some crazy shit from the inside okay because i think it's been made pretty clear that the democrats are going to they're not going to fucking save us no they're not they haven't done jack shit no spineless totally spineless the issue i think too is that ice probably functions how like police departments function in that it's a gang and they're all like you know kissing each other's ass and like tattling on people that aren't doing their job correctly it's like an amazon culture i'm sure there's they're dumb

people that have jobs all the time you know yeah so i think that if you want to be dark woke and take this shit down from the inside like you can do that just through sheer like incompetence while like pretending to be competent and people do this in corporate america all the time you can totally do it in ice i've done that for whole years on my job i think i just i don't know i told i just i think we need to start doing some stuff i completely agree and then somebody's gotta document all of the shit that they're doing free free the people in the detention centers yeah yeah or like yeah plan some kind of heist from the inside where you like unplug all the cameras and like free everybody who's stuck in

these detention centers like most recently cbs well i mean they've done a lot of things but like within the last what was it month they didn't air that 60 minutes episode that was supposed to be about seacott yeah and how atrocious it is yeah and it's because uh donald trump doesn't want people to know yeah right seacott is a fucking concentration camp it's literally a death camp yeah it's awful it's awful and we're sending innocent people there did you watch the story no it's on youtube i know i need to see it i think cory booker posted well i pulled up i haven't looked at it yet um but i saw something on threads which i've been posting a lot on i know i need to start i don't have i'm posting on threads well you know what threads treats me better okay my

shit goes viral on threads yeah i got like people got like really mad at me for one of my posts on threads and so what did you say i said that i it was obviously tongue-in-cheek on threads i'm like you guys are taking shit too seriously exactly what i said was i think calm down i think it should be illegal for therapists to take off on the holidays which i stand by they're like um excuse me yeah i'm a mental health worker or i'm i'm a health care worker and we need breaks too i'm like yeah no fucking shit i don't actually mean it i just mean like we need you the most right now you know what i mean i need to talk about my fucking christmas come back to work uh the thing that i pulled up where was it i can't find it now but it was like a whole thing

for um doxing ice agents and it also had a link to the 60 minutes episode i need to watch it it's horrific i believe it and important so i'm glad that people have access to it even though they won't post it or won't share it on cbs themselves were any clips shared of it on tiktok probably i haven't seen any since i'm not yeah that's true you yeah you wouldn't know i'm like what's going on what are you guys talking about are they talking about it on the tiktok what's trending um someone tell me i have some topics for us um i can't wait the first one's talking tits amazing i love it so it's it's very it's very relevant for a conversation that you and i have had a lot of times on this podcast um a new survey out of the uk found that more than half of

therapists who work with addiction say they've seen a noticeable increase in people coming in for problems with what they call quote unquote out of control porn use over the past year specifically over the past year screen addiction according to the british they should just tell to start using draft kings yeah i'm sure online betting is illegal in the i'm sure it is okay or eu i'm sure it is so um they're also doing some fucked shit though oh yeah everywhere is according to the british association for counseling and psychotherapy survey about 53 percent of therapists reported it folks saying the porn use was actually interfering with their lives their work or relationships or they were chasing more extreme content that's so insane yeah well

you know what it's problem solved because we have ai now so they can start generating even more pornography yeah start having cyber sex with your chat gpt like a like a real man um and just kidding that was a joke and oh an expert quoted in the piece said that a lot of people don't even recognize it as an issue at first it starts as something casual but then it becomes more compulsive and harder to control and shame keeps people from talking about it yep which honestly this is more this is kind of this is a serious topic but it was reminding me in when I first started masturbating like like uh I don't want to say frequently like often I thought that I had a problem and we had like praying after every yeah every god

I'm so sorry I'm a sexual deviant I'm so sorry the post-nut clarity was me just crying to god um but i like we had a day in health class in 10th grade where we could like write anonymous questions and like put them in a box and mine was how do you know if you're addicted to masturbating they totally thought a boy asked that oh for sure was it only girls in the class no no it was girls and guys but the answer was like if it starts interfering with your life then like and it obviously it wasn't so i was like oh thank god are you leaving class did your like well also i think like yeah when your body's developing yeah hormones are going crazy i was so confused i was like why do i want to do this all the time well because it feels good and the

oxytocin that's why but at the time i was like i'm the worst person that's ever existed i'm a freak um meanwhile boys are just jerking off everywhere yeah disgusting crossing crossing their legs in class and I remember talking to boys who like that I knew in high school like as they got older they were like yeah it would just happen in class and you couldn't do anything like there would be no reason for you to be getting a boner yeah you would have one yeah that sucks I never noticed anybody having a boner growing up either so they were doing a good job concealing it just flipping it into their waistband yeah maybe according to super bad feels good to do that way well damn tuck it into your waistband but then what if it pokes out the top then i mean that seems yeah

i guess then maybe you have a giant tick yeah i was gonna say i don't think yeah i think at that point what's the problem yeah oh i'm sorry your dick's so big oh poor you must be terrible um okay continuing on with this therapists are calling for more awareness and even a national strategy to understand and address the problem not a moral panic about porn itself but real help for people whose lives are getting disrupted I think it's ultimately comes down to screen addiction I don't think it's like yeah sure pornography is kind of like the focus of it and I think it's an introduction to screen addiction or I don't know I think we're already addicted to our screens and then like there's been already been so many studies on like

pornography addiction so I think if we just do a little bit of cross-referencing here with what we know about screen addiction and what we already know about porn addiction like we're we're just priming literally everyone to be addicted to something yeah oh absolutely like kids are like addicted to vaping and now they're giving up vaping to transition to cigarettes to try and quit their nicotine addiction like they have that going on people are addicted to gambling and that's like more prevalent than ever yeah and it's because um within the last five years um there's been a lot of like changes in gambling regulations i think that happened during the first trump administration he changed a lot of rules around online gambling and sports betting

oh which is why you see it everywhere now to make them more lenient uh yeah of course more accessible of course well because gambling's illegal in a lot of states here is one of them yeah yeah yeah i think i mean that's why vegas exists yeah legally gamble there but gambling is addictive i remember watching a documentary about gambling addiction when i was in college i recently like as in literally yesterday tried playing um solitaire clash have you heard of this it's like a it's like a solitaire i love solitaire because i'm 90 years old but you can like we gotta get you on bellatro i know everybody says that but you can bet money on it and i was like you know let's see what it's about so i put like a i put like five dollars in and i immediately can

see why that shit's addictive well they also most of these apps they like you win some money the first time yeah and then you keep trying so you'll keep like you you're like well i won money that first time yeah yeah it's fucked up and i realized that that's what was happening and like the people that i was playing against were computers and they were like you know making me lose and i was like oh but like the color they make it look like a casino like it's really crazy this app is fucking crazy but it's a lot of fun and i get it but now like i feel lucky that i'm able to kind of like look at it from you know 10 000 feet just have these like little addiction machines in our hands yeah and it's always anything you want any like if you want to know something you can just look

it up on your phone it benefits these companies it's all about their bottom line they want they're just they want you to get addicted so that they can make money you need to remember that all of the time anytime you are buying something anytime you're like participating in something online just know that the bottom line for everyone involved is to make money off of you yeah that's why i think amazon's become so successful because it is so immediately gratifying you get you want something you get it immediately and it's also a piece of shit yeah it ends up like i feel like anytime i've bought something from amazon it's like not well made it's like terrible quality also i don't know i read so many reviews exploitation that's gone into it yeah i like

i will only buy something off of amazon if i genuinely cannot find it somewhere nearby or somewhere else online yeah that's fair anyways so that was my talking tits i have um a game oh i love the reason that i'm blasting through is because we have a few things we want to talk about today so i put together a list of pet names and i want you to tell me i want you to rate all of these one to ten without knowing what's coming next oh on how mad you would be if someone called mr liz one of these names someone else not me yeah okay how mad i would be okay and let's let's picture a hot woman you know because i feel like that changes it like if it's like you know like a no that makes me more mad like a like a dude at a diner you know what i mean a hot woman that

is not as hot as me no right but still hot okay but you're hotter yeah but she's she's still hot enough for you to be like can you not exactly i have had a hot woman hit on him i love when that happens well i like it's someone that we know too and when he told me that i was just like well how do you feel about it like because he was clearly uncomfortable and i'm he was just like i'm i'm just like disappointed that this like fucks up our friendship now i didn't know this did i know that this happened was this a while ago it was a while ago yeah yeah um okay ready numero uno baby boy baby boy wait so is one the most mad most mad um baby boy that one's pretty funny baby boy i think i would be like 10 like least mad because i think that's really funny

interesting if someone just call my boyfriend baby boy okay i would never stop calling him that that's so true okay big boy big boy nine nine but this is a hot woman you know it's not like i know but these are so funny i know but i think if i wasn't so secure in my relationship maybe these would piss me off yeah but yeah i don't know i think those two are very funny okay so nine and ten okay baby boy handsome like as a name not just your handsome like hey handsome and i'm right there no you oh i'm not there no okay so i'm gonna change the stakes here because you are secure so i'm going to try to make you feel more insecure in this scenario just for the sake of the game okay you are you saw this in a text message a private text message okay if I saw

this in a text message if I saw any of these because you know exactly what would piss me off oh yeah like okay if I wasn't there and he said these if someone said these things to him in real life like anytime someone's been a little flirty with him even when I'm not there he's like that's my purse I don't know you yeah yeah yeah which is the best leave me alone but there's something about it like even if I have a girlfriend tells you like this person texted me and called me big boy in a text like I would still be fucking pissed yeah when it's in a text message it's like okay girl what you trying to play here yeah like what okay okay so we'll go back okay so we're gonna start again baby boy in a text that's still pretty fucking funny I think baby boy and big boy

i think big boy would piss me off the least so that one can be 10 okay i i know we're breaking the rules so nine and ten yeah nine and ten and then handsome in a text message i'll put that one in the middle five okay interesting i don't know what's about to come i know so they might be super benign you don't know he is handsome though he is he is very handsome my love my love uh four wow i don't like that cutie like how you call in cutie yeah that would piss me off yeah um side note let's do all of my girlfriends and relationships call their significant other cutie I it just happened randomly yeah I noticed you and uh Frank do that oh yeah I started doing it

because of uh Ariella Vandenberg and Matt Cutchall on yeah she always calls him cutie and I thought it was so cute this was like 10 years ago I was like when I have a boyfriend well we started doing it when we saw we watched like a video of like a a guy who's not a native English speaker saying words that he thought were really like cute that he learned in English and he said cutie pachootie oh yeah because he calls you pachuti yeah so mr liz calls me pachuti that's so cute which is very like specific to me yeah and we've kind of like it's evolved into like cutie pachuti cute and just cutie like so for a little while we call each other like pachuti but then no it's just but that i don't know it just kind of became like you're cutie and i'm pachuti that's so

fucking cute and then uh he'll like he'll make variations of pachuti so and he just like will come home and have boyfriend zoomies and i'll be like pachuchi where are you that's so cute so someone called him cutie i'd be like bitch yeah two yeah because i i need to save that number one spot daddy one i knew you were gonna you're dead one i knew you were gonna get out of here okay he i think he would block someone if they said that and it wasn't me oh yeah no i would be i would be like steaming mad yeah daddy yeah girl you better watch out yeah i'm mad at this hypothetical woman um good boy good boy what do i have open uh you have three six seven and eight three okay good boy three hmm i'm like maybe it would be six it's either three or six

good boy he's not submissive so i think he'd be like i just always think of like scenarios that like i would be pissed if this was in and it was like if it's like he'd three frank did something i'm sticking on three good if frank did something like like a favor for someone and she was like good boy i'd be like somebody's gonna die tonight disrespectful as hell yeah first of all yeah um okay now you have six seven and eight okay open yeah let's see where these go king king uh eight yeah that's fair stud tell me about it uh i have what was it six seven eight open now you have six and six seven sorry i'm so sorry i i don't like that i said that i think i would do seven i think that's pretty okay i think it's i think it's old school and

dorky yeah stud and the last one is pookie pookie that's your number six i feel like this is a good you have a good ranking yeah that feels accurate i'm gonna say them in order now from least mad to most mad that you have okay big boy baby boy king stud pookie handsome my love good boy cutie and daddy that feels right that is a very i i think even now i would yeah you nailed it yeah you nailed it yeah well done what would you be the most pissed daddy i think i would be the most pissed about good boy i think i would there's something that is like very demeaning about yeah it like makes my teeth hurt when i think about it like i don't like it but i would be the most pissed yeah if someone called him daddy yeah yeah yeah that's

fair that's fair i think daddy would be my number two but there's something about thinking of somebody calling frank good boy like it makes me want to throw hands i've never fought i've never fought in my life and i've never really wanted to fight in my life but that would be the moment what would you be least pissed about probably king because he is a king yeah that i think king would be yeah if i saw a woman calling him king i'd be like yeah he is yeah true yeah you're right about that and also lose his number and you could say i mean king applies to so many things yeah i feel like king can be pretty like it could be a neutral like friendly yeah like oh my god king hey king yeah yeah yeah that's true that's true

it's like the most excusable i think if you have a man saying something that is just like correct as hell yeah king behavior king behavior oh yeah i've said that to a few of my guy friends and frank is correct yeah about a lot of things but he would never hear me say that to him you're correct about everything thank you so there's no way that he could be correct about everything exactly thank you i'm taking that to the grave i'm also going to save this for posterity for our future when you're in an argument yeah well liz thinks i'm always correct yeah so we have a clip um okay moving along to our next topic because we have two more and i don't know how much time either of them are going to take up we've been recording for 40 minutes

just a little peek behind the curtain how the sausage is made folks who knows what time it'll be for you liz texted me and was like i want you to do some podcast homework think about what would be served at a restaurant like at your restaurant and then ask phrased it terribly too it's like okay if all of your favorite foods all of your favorite things to eat like that are always a slam dunk for you yeah like it could be your favorite thing to order on Fridays and like your favorite thing that your mom makes you yeah like just things that are always a guarantee like you fucking love them this feels like a better way to ask the final meal question yeah you know because i was thinking about it you're not limited to just like one and also you don't have to think

about yourself being executed which is like if i had a menu that was all my favorite things yeah on it so my it was really interesting asking frank this because me and liz also said when we were texting about this like there's something so like loving about somebody like that you love like answering a question like this like what would be on my menu because you feel so seen yeah and I asked him and I was like oh my god like there's something so sweet about hearing him answer it when someone you love and loves you like knows you well enough that they've like observed these things about you that sometimes you don't even consciously notice about yourself like you do feel very loved yes I don't it's I love it do you want to go first um I'll be honest

i kind of forgot to ask mr liz this i thought you had already asked him i started to ask him and then um i think he had to go do something oh that's fair he does do things so he's always doing stuff well it always involves physical activity sometimes i feel like dating him is like being in a relationship with a malamute like he just needs constant like physical stimulation and luckily he is an independent person who can do that for himself hell yeah and i mean like like he literally needs like constant physical activity otherwise he's intolerable to be around wow i wonder what he would be like on adderall um he gets like kind of irritable i don't like that i've given him adderall keep going outside keep going outside king like he's having a great time

until the end and then he's like i'm having a terrible time and i'm mad yeah and that's how you know it's not for you it's not for you it's not for you um yeah tell me what's on your menu so here's what frank said so i think what my answer would be really all that i can really think of that isn't on what frank said is my mom's chicken meatballs the fucking best there's always gonna be something for mom on there oh my god they're the best and i haven't had them in so long because they take so long to make but whenever she makes them she makes like hundreds of them and i'll freeze them so i can have them whenever i want that's the best it's the most italian mom behavior ever when there's something that like like meatballs are a perfect thing that

like you can make and then you freeze them and they're great yes so fucking good i love i love something that you can freeze i'm hungry you can freeze a lot of stuff yeah you can you can freeze cheese do you know that no i didn't i didn't know she's like if you have cheese that's about to go bad you don't want to waste it put in the freezer and cheese is not cheap no cheap cheese nothing's cheap these days that's so real thanks trump okay and it'll only get worse if you fire if he somehow gets rid of uh jerome powell what the fuck dude and to be clear jerome powell still sucks but he's done a decent job all things considered you're hanging on by a thread over here yeah i mean he still is like sucking the butthole of businesses and not of course yeah i mean all

yeah all of everybody everybody in this cabinet is the united states of america it should be like the united states of corporations because that's just what we are that's the united states of monopoly wow that sounds like the a rage against the machine song united states of monopoly i mean yeah everything's a monopoly now it is i feel like this i i was thinking about this on the way here sorry to divert the conversation but as is tradition on this podcast we have to um it all of the pharmacies around me suck ass oh yeah like the pharmacies here are terrible bartels used to not be terrible and then it got bought out by cvs yeah and and cvs gutted bartels and this is like bartels is a local family pharmacy family-owned pharmacy and it used to

be amazing yeah it was the best and i just like i don't know private equity is fucking up everything i said this to you on text but i'm going to shout it from the rooftops too if you have alto in your area this is not sponsored should be honestly with how much i'm i fucking talk about alto it's a um pharmacy delivery service and like i never have to order anything they don't do adderall is the issue yeah you know so i only use them for my prozac substances are not available through those and i i get why they used to be like six months ago i could get the my adderall in there but not anymore but it's so nice i'm gonna try out cost plus drugs do they do delivery yeah they do delivery and it's also super cheap nice like it'll be cheaper even like if they don't accept

my insurance damn then it is right now fuck i got a 90 day refill of my wellbutrin and it was 50 dollars that's fucking insane the last time i bought it it was 35 for 90 days i feel like that's or maybe it was 30 it's like 10 for a 30 day so if i'm doing 90 days it's 30 that makes sense 50 was a little crazy that's a little crazy anyways anyway so here's my america sucks here's what would be on my uh my menu as per frank yes yes he said is breakfast on there i was like well it can be and he said everything's on there chocolate chip pancakes hell yeah i would add to that turkey bacon because that combo slaps especially first thing in the morning okay but here's what he said for the later in the day meal for an appetizer

chicken lettuce wraps true for dinner like main dinner chicken parm with spicy vodka sauce instead of normal tomato sauce i mean love a little kick um for a drink it would be i would have harmless harvest coconut water on the menu and cream soda amazing and then dessert he said it would be a pizookie but the the cookie would be brown butter chocolate cookie from whole foods oh have you had one of those no it sounds amazing it's so fucking dangerous they're so good and then the ice cream on the inside of the pizookie would be dairy-free fish food ice cream from ben and jerry's and i said no notes they're like perfect you know me better than anyone and then he said i was like that's so sweet that like you know all these things he and he said so casually I worship

everything that you love and then just like went back to his phone and I was like what the fuck to circle back king king behavior king behavior so thank you for this um this relationship uh yeah wasn't that fun it was it is so fun I was just like honestly I was a little high and I was just like kind of wandering around and then I think I was like making something and I or like looking at something to order i was thinking about food yeah and i was like what are all my favorite foods what you so you didn't have a chance to ask mr liz but what was what would you put i mean some of the things that would for sure be on my list are um caesar salad and french onion soup that's like if we don't know what to make and we want something that is cozy but isn't

gonna make me feel like shit we're gonna do caesar salad and french onion soup laps love it and then maybe a little slice of bread grill it up in the cast iron listen cast iron toast game changer oh um i got a renee erickson cookbook for our anniversary go ahead and flex uh and renee erickson's cookbook like says like put a little olive oil get your pan hot as possible like ideally you'd put it on a grill and you want to char it so you do it real quick get a char and that's the best kind of toast i don't know if you've uh if you've been to walrus and carpenter yes i have oh that's how they do that yeah it's truly the best yeah we went at the end of the day and kind of made friends with the bartender that was there just

because like nobody else was in there and we got just so much free bread it was love that so fun that's a little tip for everyone that lives in seattle go to walrus and carpenter at the end of the day and just be nice to them i hope they go back to their old clam recipe this is so good they're oh they i don't i don't think i and lemongrass their current one's good but the past one was phenomenal i want to go and get oysters soon let's do it okay you can have oysters with mr liz because i don't eat them you don't eat them i don't like them that's like so like cost friendly of you they're so expensive I I like the like vibe of eating oysters but like the only time I've enjoyed eating an oyster was this like oyster place we went to um in Friday Harbor

and like their whole thing is like seafood but especially oysters and clams and um they have like they're like grilled oysters and they have all of these different like fun toppings on them and they were so fucking good i was like okay i'd totally smash like 12 of these it does feel like people that don't like raw oysters fuck with grilled oysters yeah i do fuck with grilled oysters i do not fuck with raw oysters i wish i did by all accounts i should like them and i don't that's fair i mean also like there i was looking at the um norovirus outbreak in the area because we have a few friends that were sick it wasn't norovirus but i was just looking and like the cdc website has like a specific section for like oyster outbreaks because it's so common you can

get sick because they filter the wastewater through their shelves and so whatever like is going around like it's probably in the oysters great yeah so that's like fun um okay so one other note when we were at the seafood place in friday harbor um mr liz got like a uh 12 shuck your own oysters he loved it he loved having a little activity absolutely very rewarding to get the food out of it that's like again my my malamute dog i was about to say that's solving a little task oriented yeah it's like um that's why i like pistachios i mean yeah pistachios are very fun to pop up they are they are there's something rewarding about like i worked for this it's true I and that's why I think you'll like Bellatro okay you know everything

goes back to Bellatro do you need someone to teach you maybe Mr. Liz can teach you it's not that it's just like and now I'm going against what I'm about to say because I just started playing solitaire on my phone I'm just like I just don't need another thing on my phone but now I started playing Yahtzee on my phone because Frank doesn't want to play as often as I want to and I really love Yahtzee don't you hate that when you're really enjoying something and you're like Let's play again. Yeah. Like when I was with Mr.

Liz's family, we were playing. Have you played the card game golf? Yes. I love golf. I fucking love golf. Yeah. And I could play for hours and everyone wants to be done before I'm ready to be. Yeah.

Or we'll play Spottle, which is like Wordle. I love Spottle. Love Spottle. Everyone wants to be done before I'm ready to be done. Do you play it like as like a group? um i'm just thinking specifically like when i was with mr liz for the holidays oh but there was another time where we played a game with like his friends and they all wanted to be done we were playing um sardines have you played that so sardines is where like uh one person hides and

then everyone looks for that person and when you find them yes then you like all stay there yeah in that spot like sardines yeah so if you're the first one to find the person then you're the next like it's your turn to hide i think that's so cute and fun and i i had been thinking about all like where would i hide and i like finally found the person first and then they were all like okay we're done i was like it was my turn i fucking hate that and mr liz was like okay well next summer when we play you can be the first one to hide i was like good thanks it really it brings out the child in you when you're like playing a game like that and it's your turn and yeah no yeah right no i get that i'm 30 especially when it comes to your turn and the game's fucking over

yeah yeah makes you want to punch a hole in a wall um oh what other things would be on my menu yes i want to share uh croissants hands fucking down i fucking normal like plain croissants i love a plain croissant I love like a little croissant sandwich moment I love a ham and cheese croissant like I just freaking love a croissant there was I really do love a savory croissant okay there was a there was a secret bakery in Florence that was like operating like illegally through a window I'm sure like ended up I bet it was amazing I think it ended up being legal because like all the tourists would go so now it's like a thing but they had a Nutella croissant but that was actually like i still have dreams about it that sounds phenomenal i

fucking love croissants oh i don't eat enough buttery flaky we should so we should all eat more croissants that's gonna be one of my 2026 resolutions okay my parents used to get the big costco thing of croissants and those are good croissants and they really were yeah like that i remember my mom making a turkey sandwich on croissants yeah i'm so hungry right now dude this i'm getting hungry too um what else would be on it uh a large cold brew okay and i like oat milk everyone else is free to put whatever they want in theirs but um i'd have it with oat milk in there and if you know if i want a treat sometimes i'll put like a sweet cream creamer in there um what else do i freaking love i love bacon because who doesn't um there's like a

it's called like bong mu tun or something at one of the restaurants near us i fucking love it it's like this like braised pork belly and noodles and it's spicy and perfect oh oh it's so you would have like you would have like an international moment at your restaurant i'd have all kind it's just literally everything i love yeah um i also love like drunken noodles oh i love drunken noodle with fried tofu oh i don't know i just prefer it with tofu yeah that's fair i think i would definitely have that champagne okay would be on there absolutely um dessert probably half-baked ben and jerry's is just the best they're just the best well they also had um i don't know if they still have it but it's not at the qfc near our house but they

they had a cannoli ice cream what and it was so fucking good so if that's still available places i highly recommend you guys get the cannoli ice cream it sounds so good i love the cannoli ice cream americone dream oh yeah that's my dad's favorite uh so good i just love a waffle cone oh yeah love it it's i really love the tonight dough frank refuses to eat it because i don't like it really yeah he refuses to eat it because he just doesn't like jimmy fallon he's like i'm not eating that it's well my if i have to pick one with like dough i prefer half baked i get the peanut butter half baked because i love peanut butter cookies and i love i love dark chocolate um peanut butter cups the big thing from TJ's it's so good I'm so hungry dude

yeah now I'm talking about food I'm like all right let's wrap this up yeah I was about to say we we got a few emails but we'll save them for next yeah we'll do mailbag next week also I did remember that two episodes ago we talked about like uh like subspace bdsm playlist totally forgot to make one i will make one i thought of it today i'm going to make one so by the time this episode is live i will have one up for you guys and if you have been thinking about emailing us uh now is the time to do it because mailbag will be next week so hit us with your thoughts and and feelings tell us what would be on your menu i also have a question for the listeners super important i love asking this question um when you order wings do you like flats or drumsticks flats i'm a flats

girl i was a drumsticks girl but now they're always too dry i just i don't know i feel like i love flats and especially if it's like the perfect amount of crisp there's a really good wings placed by you we got wings from there on sunday and then i was like save all the bones because i'm gonna make my own bone broth so that's what i'm gonna do when i get home yeah okay make my own bone broth well let's get you out of here because i heard it's good for you it is and i watched something about like when you buy bone broth it's like basically not bone broth what do you mean like uh i watched this girl who was like explaining like she did some investigating into like broth and like what constitutes as broth like by a i don't know the cdc or some shit

whatever the FDA yeah um it's only a tiny amount of actual like and this isn't just bone broth it's like all broth like only the tiniest amount of like chicken or beef or whatever it is needs to actually be in it for it to count as broth so what's likely in most of our broth isn't actually any like you know real broth stuff it's just like gonna be a little bit of chicken broth or whatever vegetable broth combined with a fuck ton of water and flavors that's disgusting it's disappointing so make your own and then tell me how it goes because i it should be it i'm sure it's gonna be really easy and it's cost effective so if you ever get like a rotisserie chicken save that shit and boil it up baby there's one

thanksgiving my mom saved the turkey carcass which is the grossest word ever but she made um turkey pho for all of us oh my god dude life-changing that sounds amazing and it's such i like you know if you're gonna eat meat you might as well use the whole yeah as much as you can use as much as you can yeah um in this day and age in this economy in this economy we're just gonna throw a carcass and not make bone broth well well i i have so many stomach issues that and they've been getting out of hand you guys like i'm on the bus wondering if i'm gonna shit my pants that's not good no and i i never shit my pants that's important but i've had some close calls yeah and there's something so demoralizing being like i don't know if i'm gonna make it to a bathroom

oh yeah and also living in a city that like fucking hates homeless people like you can't use any bathroom yeah every bathroom has a code on it and it's just like can can you do can you let us all have the dignity of like going to the bathroom yeah even if some of us don't have a house yeah it doesn't feel like too much to ask some of us have IBS yeah and also I see poop like in Pioneer Square all the time like yeah what if they just had a bathroom yeah well in Japan they have bathrooms that like I don't know if you've seen videos of it but like they're public bathrooms you put a few coins in there you can use them and they like once you leave it sprays the whole thing the whole the whole thing is sanitized so everything's always wet but i'm like okay

you know what i think it's fine if everything's wet as long as it's clean yeah yeah i don't know because there's a lot of bathrooms that are wet and not clean exactly yeah like if it's gonna be wet it might as well be sanitized so true queen anyway let's get you home so you can make your bone broth yeah i gotta make my bone broth well all that to say i think the bone broth will be good for my stomach it's supposed to be very good for you i mean obviously if it's made correctly yeah there's a lot of health benefits for bone broth yeah yeah probiotics hydration collagen i especially want it for the collagen hell yeah my joints be hurting that's that's so real so true so true okay love you guys we love you our children

i had to point at liz for that she was she was about to have me do with this i was gonna say i didn't want to interrupt because you it was so beautiful thank you so much thank you really came in with that thank you i felt it from just like soft riff it came from the depths of my soul okay ariana okay the power of christ can tell me um i think things are gonna get better because ariana is a brunette again i know i do think that that's a good that feels like a good sign yeah i agree i also think i'm i don't know i think donald trump has one to three months left max have you have you seen clips of him lately like him like just standing up and looking out the door in the middle of like an important conversation yeah a meeting with all

the biggest oil executives and he's like i'm gonna look at it at my construction yeah and then marco rubio slipped him a note and he read it out loud so fucking funny and he just kind of makes noises i don't know i'm like i'll have what he's having yeah honestly which is a lot of drugs and a spray tan yeah that doesn't feel like too much to ask yeah give me give me a lot of drugs and a spray tan I'll be having the time of my life as well yeah anyways