The Hoely Hour - Dating on Stage with Alli Goldberg

Episode Date: February 6, 2026

Our guest this week is comedian Alli Goldberg! Alli is the mastermind of "Love Isn't Blind," a live dating show where the men can't speak. In fact, your mom might have to speak for you... Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

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No insurance, no problem. Now get $80 off your first month with promo code SPACE80 when you go to Talkspace.com. Match with a licensed therapist today at Talkspace.com. Save $80 with code SPACE80 at Talkspace.com. But there was one guy where he was like, can you talk to my cousin? I'm really close with her.

And I was like, okay. So I called his cousin and I said, why do you think this man would make a great partner? And she paused and she goes, I don't. we're joined today by the hilarious comedian and hostess extraordinaire of love isn't blind allison goldberg do you go by ali or allison or both if we're gonna be friends it's ali and i feel like we're there considering we already spoke for like 10 minutes before this intro yeah i already feel like we were friends anyway we couldn't we couldn't stop talking already okay

ali has been featured in la magazine good morning america the savage love cast wired npr which is i'm like i was like fangirling about that i love npr like that's the part that's confusing me too it's so seattle i sit in my car and listen to npr i love npr good good um and the la times and more so thank you so much for joining us ali we're so excited to have you on i'm so excited to be here we have so much to discuss where do we start i don't need well honest yeah go ahead i know where we can start well so what i wanted to know is well first could you give our listeners kind of like an overview of what love isn't blind is um just so they can get a good idea and potentially come see your show in seattle oh my gosh and apply apply to be a contestant nominate your single friends

so love isn't blind is a comedy dating show where the men can't speak because straight men should be seen but not heard so we have four men on stage we have a bachelorette i do want to let all them if you have male listeners i do want to let you know it's not a roast show yeah an occasional man might be in the room and that's a good man the man who's listening to this right now is a man in the right place we're looking for good men like i joke that the men you know they shut the fuck up but i will say like the show is about kind of like what is positive masculinity, right? Like there's so much discourse around toxic masculinity, but the guys who opt into doing this show, like tend to be nice, good guys who are here for the feminist joke. They're

ready to shut the fuck up for the feminist bit. And there, I try to find like ambitious, interesting, passionate people. So it's not, it's not at all a man hating show, a joke. It's much more of a toast show. Like I'm going to talk you up. I'm going to score you dates. And as you just mentioned, you know, someone who went on a date with one of my contestants. Yeah. Right. And like the whole lineup seemed like really good dudes that were in Seattle. I love those dudes. They were so great. It was so hard to find them, but they were wonderful. Tell us about like what the demographics are and all this. Like what have you learned about all the major cities? Everyone likes to say that their city is the worst for dating and they're wrong. It is Seattle. It is

Seattle. And it's no shade on Seattle. Like I actually really love Seattle, but I think it's a combo of factors. Like tell me what you think, because I also think there's like a self-selection with like who applies or is willing to do my show but um I find that way more people are taken like I think people like just maybe it's fantastic for dating and that's why it's hard for a dating show but it's very hard to find contestants in Seattle a lot of people seem to be already taken and then there is that Seattle freeze where like a lot more men seem nervous about getting on stage than your New York your LA but even your DC like DC is wild um so yeah Seattle I do think is tricky for dating or it's the total opposite and everyone's just like paired up and it's interesting

how different Seattle is from San Francisco like I thought when I started performing there they were going to be kind of similar because the tech scene and again I think Seattle's great like Seattle is like smart and weird but San Francisco also still has that like new age hippiness San Francisco's such a weird mix of like they're all in tech but they've all done ayahuasca and therefore they're ready to get on a dating show. Do you know what I mean? That's so true. I think my official conclusion is that there's not as much drug usage in Seattle. What do you think about that? I mean, maybe more people need to do ayahuasca in Seattle. Yeah. I just feel like that would probably help the general masses. I am an ayahuasca virgin though.

I am too. I would like to try it, especially because I have a lot of contestants who have done it and many of them have said, I saw God and she was beautiful. And I'm into that review. But Seattle's, I mean, it's fun. I'm coming back, you know, so I'll be back February 27th. And the guys were great. And the Bachelorette was, I loved her. She's, she is amazing. I mean, the Bachelorette I had at the last Seattle show, she does, she works in gender affirming health care. Oh, I love her already. and yeah and i don't think she has any personal relation to it but she said like i think it was i don't want to mess up her story but i think it's like when she was like doing rotations and exploring different areas like these people were so thrilled and so happy with the results and like she really felt like she was making a difference and she was so sweet and then

for fun she makes earrings and she gave me she gave me uterus earrings the same my body my choice yeah we love her what did she make them out of she 3d prints them yeah oh man I feel like we should drop her Etsy shop like in the show notes and absolutely yeah they were I loved the roundup so I I do I do jokingly bitch that it's really hard to find the contestants in Seattle like harder than other cities but I love that lineup like so nice and um all of the guys after were like how can I help like I didn't like the venue I was at and they were I mean multiple the one your friend went on a couple dates with Ru like he was giving me venue suggestions like that I did to be to be super clear I did find great people in Seattle and the audience was rowdy so I'm

excited to come back and do it again there I'm so excited to go I was so sad I couldn't be there last time it sounded like so much fun so I'll definitely be at this next one I don't know if you know this Amelia lore but Amelia was on stage in a dating show as well this was like right before COVID happened Bachelor Live on stage so pretty early on in 2020 they were like okay we can't have people like kissing each other on stage so they canceled it but you you got what didn't it start in Seattle or something they had they just started the Bachelor Live okay it had just started i think they had only done a few stops but ally when you were talking about it being hard to find people that aren't like coupled up the bachelor during bachelor live on stage he had a girlfriend

who was in the audience and watched me make out with him yeah what i'm like is that like a thing or like what's like yeah she's like she has like a she's like jerking off in the audience do this i'm gonna be famous it's fine her her audience chair was the cuck chair yeah wait how how did they how was this person even chosen as the bachelor well they had they chose him and then they were like okay so like you've been chosen do not like you have to get off dating apps and stuff until like we film because we don't want you but he didn't and so he met somebody like a month or so before going on and was like making out with like multiple of us on stage and then when he picked the girl that won and like she was trying to like go on his like party bus after the

girlfriend kicked her off the bus so okay amelia something slightly similar has happened to me but it it's i have a better version of that story which is that i have had guys that i have locked a month in advance and then the week of the show they're like i started seeing someone i didn't think it was and they tell me they're like but actually it's like a so they tell me like i don't i don't feel totally comfortable going on now it's gotten serious with her and i actually like love that non-fuckboy energy that they come to me and they tell me the dilemma is it's a as with my producer hat on it's like a crisis i mean i i use that loosely we work in comedy but like you know someone dropping out the week of the show i'm like fuck but i do love i'm like oh man check i did find

a good one but now he's dating someone you know um but i love when they admit that but i have had one or two guys who actually i think are still good guys they i found out after the show that they had a date in the audience and they just kind of like torpedoed themselves and like the final round because i'm like like you see them do like really weird things in the final round anyway these two guys in particular that come to mind they both said to me because these were both in la they were like i thought about dropping out but like as a producer like i didn't want to do that to you and so i just figured i won't win and i was like which was also like kind of sweet but then that bachelorette in the audience finds out and they're like you want someone in like what

the fuck anyway so yeah that I mean that is that is a better solution I guess than just like you know pretending like they don't have a girlfriend and trying to like yeah win a date like that your story is so wild and like who's that woman who kicked someone off the bus like I would sit that woman down and be like no leave this man leave yes hello they didn't stay together go hang out with that woman right no they didn't stay together very long and he ended up going on the actual show the bachelorette he was like one of the contestants in the bachelorette i forgot about that yeah and i was like oh do i like do i like start a reddit war about this but i was like no not my circus not my monkeys you know i'm just gonna let it be just gonna let it be reddit would have ate that

up yeah they really would have um i wanted to ask you a little bit more so like what does each round kind of look like i was binge watching all of the videos uh of your shows and they're so funny like obviously the men aren't allowed to talk um you call their moms yeah and have them around three yeah uh-huh yeah okay so they have to make it past a few different tests so like does the audience vote them off the island or does the bachelorette kind of like lead the way the bachelorette gets to bring her bestie up with her on stage so you two are both taken but like one of you would be the bachelorette the other one would be the bestie and i actually am like i love this part because when i was initially devising the show i tried to think through what

are all the moments that could be awkward or weird and i love that i'm actually showcasing like real women who for instance work in health care or run their own startup or whatever it is and so but they're not necessarily used to being on stage and so they get to have their best friend with them and the feedback i've gotten from bachelorettes is pretty unanimously like they're terrified for the first like four minutes and then their bestie comes out and joins them and they're just having the time of their life, like making this lore, you know? And so you have your friend there supporting you and I walk you through the whole thing on stage, but yeah, it's an elimination style game show. So you and your bestie, the bachelorette and bestie kind of, they have a

moment to talk about it. And then they eliminate a guy after rounds two, four, and five. So round one is a rapid fire questions round. Mostly yes or no. The guys can do thumbs up for yes, thumbs down for no. I might ask them things on a scale from one to 10, but they can't speak. So ask questions. Audience members before the show can leave questions in a hat. So ask questions. I also pull questions from the hat and then I toss it to the bachelorette and her bestie and they also ask questions. And the questions like really can be anything as long as they can't speak. So on Friday in LA, the bachelorette asked, she's Latina, and she was like, can you handle your spice like better than like the average white boy? Something like that. They weren't all white boys. But anyway, one of them I ended up pouring hot sauce directly into his mouth. So yeah, like if whatever happens, I will like yes and that, you know what I mean? So that's round one. round two changes from show to show so I had them doing this like new year's resolution thing obviously for January for December I had them parody that love actually note card scene which like love actually love actually I think is a horrible movie we can talk about that another

time I think it's a toxic terrible movie I know shots fired Amelia is so offended I'm clutching my pearls but I can understand why you why you think that it's just such a classic in my house but we'll talk we'll circle back yeah yeah no if like if you want if you re-watch it as an adult you're like every single one of these relationships is problematic and that note card scene is him professing his love to his best friend's wife like what are you doing anyway but i had the guys like confess a secret with note cards and i played like silent night underneath so round two changes from show to show also because seattle i've this you know is a newer city for me but there are cities where i've been going back every two months for two years so there are also a lot of regulars

and i want to make sure that like i'm changing things up round three i call their moms um occasionally a mom isn't available and i fucking love to call an ex-girlfriend um yeah it's so fun it's so fun and look i mean i think it actually speaks really well of the men who let me do that because they're giving me her number so this is like like it's so interesting okay so in round one, very often the audience will ask from the hat, they'll ask, are you friends with any exes? And it divides the room because half the room is like, okay, if you have an actually healthy relationship with your ex, that's a green flag, you know, that you can like move past that and have that emotional intelligence. Of course, there are ways that I think people just like

keep their exes in orbit and it's horrible. But anyway, then later I call an ex sometimes and it really like sort of divides the room. But I think it's really a testament to, especially like if they dated for years and now they're really truly friends um that they were able to like work past that in chicago i called an ex and you know they dated i think i think for a while i want to say that yeah but it was years ago and she's married and pregnant and she just roasted him and he just was dying laughing and it was so fun and she was like i know he's tall ladies but he has weak knees you can take him like she was just she was on a she was so fantastic i mean she also like had a comedy background so she just like understood the assignment yeah so i mean

there's so much i can say yeah she also said to him on stage on the phone she's like and don't forget i agreed to do this because you're gonna buy me a cameo by creed you know that website that cameo where you're like yeah what she didn't know is that my other contestant was the cfo of creed so the audience lost their fucking minds yeah so it's like really fun i mean you you know as performers like it's also so fun these moments where you're like i could never in a million years have planned that yeah and the fact that she was like you owe me a cameo and i was like well i think we could make that happen you know so um anyway i digress round three i call someone round four, I search their phones. Round five, we get to hear their voices. And then the winner is sent

on an immediate date. Is searching phones, is it just like search history or is it like just anything? So I do like to walk that line where I don't actually want to, I want everyone to be scared, but I don't want anyone to feel bad or be humiliated. So behind the scenes, the men are allowed to tell me if something is off limits and I will not touch it. So like I had a guy tell me once he was like, my notes app is my therapy notes. And I was like, I'm not going to touch your notes app. Like I'm not actually looking to like humiliate anyone. Yeah. That said, otherwise I go to town. So like I've searched like Reddit communities that they're in, which I think is such a fun snapshot of their personality. I've done this past Friday,

I did Reddit comments. I've also started opening chat GPT and saying, tell me all my flaws, be harsh but chat gpt is such a fucking ass kisser like it never gives you anything good um yeah i do amazon yeah amazon purchases uh yeah and i i want to do new stuff too i love going to people's notes apps because you see like their brain and like the random lists and thoughts they have and like but yeah it's really fun but it is a crap shoot like i don't know what i'm gonna find right i hate when like right after the show the guy comes up to me he's like oh you should to search by blah blah blah and I'm like okay but I was on stage and I didn't you know what I mean like you have to make a choice on stage I'll ask the audience sometimes I'll be like what do you

want to search and I try to figure out based on their personality like some of the guys um I find them through reddit like I'll post on reddit that I'm looking for good guys and but so if I find them through reddit I'm gonna fucking search their reddit because I know they're active there so sometimes I try to suss out like okay where do we think they're active you know that's so smart have you had any moments in any of those rounds that are like a total like shit show like things just like fall apart or does it go pretty like smooth so there's definitely times that i don't find anything and i'm and so then i just kind of make a joke like wow this man is boring and stable get them ladies you know what i mean like yeah that's kind of the worst that's happened in that

round but yes some of the men are like super boring and stable but that's great we love that you know um totally i try to just like get a laugh and get out in that but in terms of things that have gone really like wildly chaotically wrong is like when a mom throws her son under the bus like i tell the boys i'm like i'm not gonna throw you under the bus like your mom might i'm not but the moms have it's happened rarely but it has happened what what it's like what type of stuff will the moms say there was one time this isn't too bad but the one that comes to mind he because he was a great sport he was laughing so much and then he was like please don't put that on the internet but he had a great time because i also just you know like everyone especially for the

listeners like if you do the show it does not immediately go on the internet like you get a form right afterwards that's like are there any moments you don't want to see on the internet like i do want it to be a show that ultimately does feel like safe and kind even though it's also even though it's insane so like i don't i don't just put things immediately on the internet but this mom was like, she was like, I don't know. He's a real neat freak. And I was like, that sounds good. We love a man who's neat. And she's like, it's too much. I feel sorry for his future wife. I was like, the audience was screaming. The audience was screaming. And there was one time that a guy, his mom had already passed. That happens sometimes, which is really sad. I've

had guys reach out and be like, I want to do your show, but my mom has passed, so I can't. And I'm like I'm not gonna penalize you for that so but there was one guy where he was like can you talk to my cousin I'm really close with her and I was like okay so I called his cousin and I said why do you think this man would make a great partner and she paused and she goes I don't at least she's honest my god and he was a great sport he was like you can put that online I don't care and I was like okay it was so crazy though I was like what is happening like but I love those moments I'm like the whole audience is just like screaming like literal screams you know but it's so crazy but I tell the best I'm like I'll take great care of you I don't know who

about everybody else but I'll take care of you you're like speechless yeah no no I was gonna say I was we both have a question so I was like Liz you want to take it wait no I'll let you I have a million questions so I'll let you I do too no I was just like has there ever been an experience where a guy has been eliminated and he's like a shithead about it or are they like all pretty like really it's it's very rare i have to say like i need to count because i think i'm coming up on my hundredth show which is fucking crazy yeah congratulations of that thank you so of that i think there's been like two or three duds so i think i think my hit rate is okay is okay like there's gonna be duds there's one guy in particular comes to mind really early on it's

like a third show and he was eliminated first and oh ladies if you come to my show pay such attention to the guy who's eliminated first and how he handles it because there's okay so this guy he was like so butthurt and like would not let it be and I tell the women I'm like hey it's sort of fun if you want to give a reason you're eliminating him but make sure it's like nothing personal right like and I give them there's a clipboard on their seats they can take notes you know i said keep it funny you know like oh we love that you're so close with your mom but unfortunately you know you don't wash your legs and that's a deal breaker you know i mean you can do something silly yeah so they both worked at a large large company and so she used that as like

just a nice friendly like i don't know i feel like we work we work at the same place that feels too close to home she gave some like fluff rejection reason he would not stop about how like i should not be selecting people who both work at this company this company is 20 000 employees like You know what I mean? It's, like, a huge, huge company. But I'm feeling like I can't name it. But also, like, of course I can name it. Like, it's Google.

Like, it's Google. Like, they work at Google. You know what I mean? Like, this is, everybody works at Google. So, but he, it wasn't just that. He was, like, butthurt about it all night. Like, to the point that audience members were, like, he was, like, sulking in the back. Like, people noticed.

And then he was leaving me long voice notes for, like, months. I ended up, like, blocking him. Yeah, I, like, removed him from my mailing list. I blocked him. Yeah. He was being, like, really. and then he was like in a photo that got used in press and he like went ballistic on me again and i was like this is a photo of you just like smiling but sure i'll write the reporter like

it was just all kinds of crazy scary guy good thing he got eliminated too i know that's the thing too i'm like way to prove the point that you should be eliminated your vibes were that bad you had to go first so bad they're so bad well are there any but on the flip side i was gonna ass there's the stories that are the opposite like there was this guy who showed up i fucking love him we'll name him tristan we love tristan in san diego he just had the best most positive energy the whole time he shows up in a pink suit he like dances on stage he throws things in the audience he gets eliminated first he continues to giggle and laugh through the whole thing and cleans up at the after party because his energy was just so positive and i always feel

a little like and i try to keep eliminations really positive like when a guy's eliminated i tell the audience i'm like i don't want to hear any oh no like these guys are up here doing the scary thing we're gonna go wild for them like even if they don't win love we show them love we chant their name we cheer we have sex with them they're fair game now like i give them a prize like they i wing people who wear wings who greet him get him a free drink like i try to keep the elimination super positive but all that said this guy tristan was just like a fucking gem like people like i've had people still mention him he didn't quote unquote win the show but people are still talking about Tristan because he was so positive and then ever since then he's been like

oh do you need volunteers at the next San Diego show he's been like helping out so it's so interesting to see also how the men handle this like it's a light silly rejection like I also tell the guys I'm like look it's it's the show is a better show when I can make real matches and I do have success stories but at the end of the day it's also a comedy show and like you're just there to have fun so it's really interesting to see how like the male ego handles it I was I'm trying to weed them out in advance. Right. You do.

You do the homework. I'm trying a little. Yeah. I mean, three out of 100 is like you have that's a really good hit rate. So yeah, I feel like it's not bad. Maybe there's one or two others that I'm forgetting. But I will say like it's actually made me more positive about men. Like I was very jaded about men when I started the show.

I've gotten handwritten thank you notes from men after doing the show, which is like what? I didn't know people do that at all anymore. um are there any like success stories like are there any couples that hit it off and stayed together so many so I know I could talk about this all day I'm so sorry I feel like I'm already talking your ear off but no you have a marriage whoa yeah that's a big deal but but caveat I joke that my onstage success rate is questionable there's a ton of relationships coming out of the audience and the contestants with the audience I think it's really about creating great because i'm taking credit yeah actually the couple they got married it's really cute so they

met at like my second show so i got really lucky in terms of like having that story really early but um they met my second show i've been doing the show for three years they came back to a show like two months ago to celebrate their three-year anniversary and they let me know they said you know they were doing a variety of things they're married now but they let me know that they were coming and i said will you be the wing people because i have a couple that wears wings that goes and like helps people meet each other they pass out wristbands everyone gets a wristband based on their relationship status so they were the wing people and it was cute too because they were like oh my god this has grown so much they were so sweet but it was amazing for the audience

for me to introduce tonight's wing couple and be like they met here three years ago pretty much to the day they're married and they're back to help all of you out tonight and the audience went wild probably a higher success rate than like a dating app then oh yeah well everyone's meeting yeah I think dating apps are slot machines so I think people play them and we all have a friend who has won the lottery we we know people who win and that keeps everyone else swiping but I think that they are slot machines they're designed to be addictive they are designed to be a slot machine that's literally what they are they are a gambling addiction and I think what I what I love I mean I'm biased, but what I love so much about my show is just like creating this playground that then

everyone else can play in. And so like, I'll say on stage, like if these contestants can do these shenanigans on stage tonight and take these risks, like you can say hi to someone tonight. It's not that hard. And so the show turns into an after party where people really are talking to each other. So I have a, I have a bachelorette who has moved in with a guy she met from the audience that night and multiple people have moved in together. And then I have a decent success rate in the sense that the winner and the bachelorette there's like some kind of chemistry and maybe they'll go on like two dates or four dates or like eight dates and I get really excited but I'm like dating is still dating and it fizzles but there's a lot of that and then I have a lot

of relationships where the bachelorette goes on to seriously date someone she eliminated oh so I've started yeah so early on when I realized well early on I realized like the guys are released into the audience and getting like tons of numbers the bachelorette just gets the one so i started telling everyone behind the scenes i'm like look play the games with me but like meet everybody so for the bachelorette meet all the guys like you have to eliminate someone but like meet them all after then go mingle with the audience i tell the bestie like make sure you pull her away at the after party even if she's really into the winner because dating is still dating so like i want all my contestants walking away with multiple phone numbers so yeah i just

found out today about another success story i'm pretty excited about it i have a san diego bachelorette who's getting pretty serious with a guy that she eliminated second and they're both texting me really cute stuff about how they're really excited and he's making all these jokes about like never sleep on third place you know what i mean because he was he came in third but like now they're dating but interestingly behind the scenes i did think they were a match like i thought that's who she was going to choose you already sussed it out yeah although it's funny because i'm not necessarily right like i love i love also seeing what she's gonna do because i don't know like i always go in with my theories and i'm often wrong i think she did make the right

choice on stage because there was this amazing comedic through line happening with this one guy and like things they had in common and so like i love that she chose him that night but behind the scenes i did think she was better like maybe a fit with this other guy and they're dating and so today they were like don't announce us yet you know but they were like because i think i think they're both like into it and like don't want to jinx it but they're like we're gonna send you some real fucking cute photos in a month and i'm like okay i love that there's a lesson in that i think of like you know the it's not always like somebody that you might write off might be like the right person for you yeah well think about that guy that fucking bro who was so butthurt i want to

name him but i'm not going to because he'll come after me anyway he was so good you could have met so many i'll tell i'll tell you when we're done recording everything about him no one should date him but anyway um but imagine if he had had a better fucking attitude he could have walked away with so many at numbers that night but people saw him sulking in the back and they were like that's weird like it's a comedy yeah it's yucky you know and like yeah like well this is a good message to the listeners even if you're not a contestant you could still find love in the audience with another audience member or a contestant that was booted off who's to say yeah yeah yeah and and i also love it's so cheesy but I love that there are friendships coming out of it too I especially in

San Francisco there's a lot of girls who come up to me and they're like we all met here and now we come back to every show together that's so cute yeah I just think it's like let's get off screens yeah what's your favorite city like what what has like the most fun vibes well oh probably San Diego San Diego's wild like I believe it San Diego's almost too wild like San Diego is the one city where I have to be like hey I love that y'all are so into and having so much fun but we need to focus like I feel like a school teacher in San Diego because like the yes or no rounds like I'll ask a question and it's like they all have to discuss every question with all their friends like they're so rowdy they're so enthusiastic when people ask me the best city

to date I do say San Diego but Portland is also real fucking fun because Portland like is so weird it's so weird yeah it's I would take a trip to Portland to watch that I would too it it really sounds like I'm just gonna glaze you for a sec like it is such a testament to you that this show has been such like a positive force in so many people's lives because I think that there is a universe where these shows are being done and they're just like you know like not positive energy people just feeling kind of like shitty about themselves and like the fact that you've been able to create such like a positive environment that people enjoy going to and want to come back to also is yeah it's such a testament to you so congratulations on everything

you've built they know they're gonna get on stage and not be embarrassed I think that's a big deal too like everything isn't good fun it's well intended because yeah sometimes they can be kind of mean yes yeah have you seen I interviewed with them oh you did oh yeah interesting so because here's the thing I don't want to throw any shade in the sense that their show's really popular when I went everyone was loving it they were screaming but I thought it was mean it was just like like I remember the hosts made a joke where they were like oh but you have a little dick and I was like is this really like the level of humor we're doing so and that's fine like people love you know and their clips go super viral because they have like people making out on stage

and like there's a place for that for sure like I left that show feeling like okay cool we're not competitors like I do want mine at the end of the day to be kind and positive and feedback that I love is people will be like I can't believe how raunchy and wholesome that was because there's like sex stuff that obviously comes up especially like in round one but then round three the mom is like and then on Christmas morning and you're like what oh everyone's crying it's really fun yes yes I've had and I've had moms I think the the sons tell their moms like oh you got to think of a funny story about me but when i prep the moms i tell them it does not need to be funny i just want it to be specific so because the moms always start where they're like when he was two he used

to dance to this one song in diapers and i'm like nobody gives a shit what he did when he was two all kids all two worlds do that right i just want something specific like something that would only happen to him or only he would do this thing and so i said if you tell a super sweet story and your son it tears up on stage i'm here for it i'm just trying to create moments you know so like yeah it's and it's fun for me too because like the guys and the bachelorette all bring different things so every single weekend it's the same show but it's wildly different and i'm calling different moms although the craziest part of prepping the show is that i don't think people realize that there are months where i do the show every weekend which means i am prepping

16 boomer mothers oh god that shit is a while they're talking to you on speakerphone yes yes and they're just like i mean bless their hearts but like i start getting like photos of the grandchildren and like all these just like crazy texts and messages like and they'll i mean it's just wild and they're like really specific things i'll ask for and then they'll like do the opposite i don't want to spoil too much but like i surprise the guys and i like flash an awkward middle school photo when they come on stage but the moms the moms will inundate me with like baby photos and no matter how many times i'm like hey i'm really looking for ages like 12 to 15 if he has braces weird haircut and they're like look at this adorable photo of him in a basket and i'm

like i don't care i'm in a basket also it's like i know moms love being involved in their son's dating lives too like a like i don't want to say 100 of the time but they love to feel like they're being involved so i'm sure too that's just kind of like a built-in like endorsement from the mom I'm like, are you still talking to that girl from that dating show? Yeah, well, actually, yeah, something I've noticed is that immigrant moms often are very skeptical about what this is because it's, you know, the culture perhaps is more serious or reserved. So that's been an interesting trend I've seen. That is interesting. But then, yeah, I have guys that'll say, oh, my mom's on the East Coast.

It's too late for her. And I'm like, ask her. because I early on a guy was like I'm gonna introduce you to my sister it's too late for my mom I said okay I prepped the sister the mom calls me she's like what is this I tell her and she's like and I'm like he said it would be too late for you she's like I would walk across the country for him that's what she said and I was like I love this bitch let's go so then we called her and he didn't even know we were gonna call her you know so we are called we actually already a lot of the moms yeah a lot of the moms like cannot wait to do this which is really fun and

it's also fun to win them over like there was an immigrant mother who was like really skeptical of me and then the son told me later he's like you were really professional on the call and it won her over like she was really like so that I was proud of that but but yeah because I do want to earn their trust like because they're like are you about to humiliate my son like what is this like this is inappropriate and I'm like I'm gonna take great care of your son he might humiliate himself in round one but I'm gonna take great care of him in round you know what I mean so yeah but it's been very interesting you know because you're like really seeing a piece of these people's lives and you can learn so much from that mom call i tell the bachelorettes behind

the scenes i'm like if the mom says something bad believe them yeah absolutely yeah no one knows their son better yeah well there was a mom that was like he never texts me back oh and then like that guy got chosen and he ghosted the bachelorette and i was like this is the mom told you crazy she warned she told us she warned us she told us we need to listen to believe hashtag believe moms yeah um I I also wanted to ask you how did this all come about like were you just sick of dating or you knew too many great women you're like let me take care of this I mean all of that but the emphasis really was that I would go I went on so many dates with men where they would not ask me a single question about myself and they would just monologue about themselves i think we've

all been there and i thought what if i create a show where they shut the fuck up but the other thing is and then the irony of course is like i'm meeting all these great men and it's like made me more positive about men yeah and actually plot twist i now interview women and i see all the things men complain about so it's really kind of leveled the playing field like i think when you're heterosexual it's really easy to just like villainize the opposite sex because you go on all these shitty dates but I interview everyone now and the funny thing is my bisexual friends have corroborated my theory they're like yeah everyone thinks it's better because I date all genders it's just more humans and all humans are messes you know yeah so now I see that it's actually made

me more positive about men to be like oh it's not that men are necessarily the problem they often are but like not that they're not but like we're all we all are a problem in some way or you know So that's been really interesting. But the other main, main reason that I created the show was simply that my background is I've created a bunch of different shows. The show I created right before this was actually about breakup texts and I sold it to Audible. This is like my post pandemic baby. I really I love live performance and I love getting people in a room together live. Like I will just always be so obsessed with live performance. um like i just fucking love the energy in the room and i i wanted to create something especially post-pandemic that was like really rowdy and interactive like i wanted the audience involved yeah i think dating lends itself to that like if you're in a relationship and you come to my show you get a red wristband and at the after party if you successfully introduce people and you can prove it to me like if you come up to me at the merch table and you're like you see those people

hitting it off i introduce them he's getting your number i will give you a gram of mushrooms so hell yeah yeah and i announced this on stage at the top of the show i'm like couples we're glad you're here but you have fucking work to do you know so like so the couples are excited and treat it like a sport and now yeah i'm like i think that would be enough to motivate my boyfriend sign me up just for the story you know what i mean like i have a lot of people where then i give them their shrooms and they're like i don't even want the shrooms i just wanted to know that you were actually going to give them to me and i'm like i should take them but anyway but yeah so like they there's I want there to be something for everyone and like I love that the couples get

really involved and they are at the after party they're like really trying to make matches so oh I love that really it's the best it's such a good feeling to have like your own success story yeah I think I think we really need to create more of a culture of that like I feel I feel like there's too many couples who are like I'm done like I met my person I'm done and it's like you're not some bitch like you got to get to work now because when you're in a relationship it's so fun and easy to set people up because you don't have skin in the game in that way like the rejection is not personal like it is so easy for me to walk up to any man in the room and be like have you met my friend amanda she's the best like it's it's so easy you know yes so i really think

couples need to be setting up their friends like non-stop but anyway so yeah that's why i created it was were those like two reasons i i love the like wanting to bring people together because I think that is kind of like a post-pandemic symptom of like we're all kind of like isolated after not being allowed to hang out in public for like two years so yeah creating an environment that's like fun and light-hearted light-hearted and makes it like okay to be silly and like get a little bit outside of your comfort zone and know that it's going to be okay yeah yeah totally okay well i know we're running up against time i don't we don't want to take up too much of your time ali this is so great talking to you i can talk about this all day

okay amazing well i put together i put together a game um that i'm calling talk or walk where i'm going to read you some scenarios uh that a man could do on a first date and you'll tell me if it'll make it better if he talks or if it'll make it worse if he talks and that's why it's called talk or walk wow okay so scenario and will he make it better by talking or worse i fucking love this game let's go okay amelia's the game queen i love she comes up with the best games oh my god we have okay we have so much to talk about after this as well okay yeah okay the first one is he says quote i've done a lot of work on myself but won't say what or why first of all i mean he needs to talk he needs to explain himself but also the men who proactively

are like i've done the work i i doubt that they have yeah i feel like the men who have done the work or the yeah yeah that's how you know i feel like you've got to prove that you've got to you've got to prove that you've got to keep talking and and you also have to walk the walk you have to walk and talk for that one 100 completely agree okay i think i know your answer for you're saying walk walk away like or you need to do the walk oh that's that's a very important walk away at first i thought walk away but then i was like he needs to talk walk the talk yeah i mean let's let's say walk away because that feels like either you're staying on the date and you're explaining yourself or you're yeah there's no point i'm walking away right now yeah yeah okay the next

one is he mentions his ex is crazy but won't say why get out of there yeah fucking run run run walk don't run don't walk yeah the last date that I went on before I met my boyfriend was with a guy within the first like five minutes was talking about his best friend's crazy ex and I was like well I'm already I'm already checked out of this date here's my dilemma even if that person truly is crazy is it so hard for you to avoid trash talking women on a date yeah and he's doing it like ex by proxy like it's not even his ex he's talking about his friend's crazy ex yeah I'm not and she i'm not even saying she might be crazy but like you could have a better you don't need to open with a fucking topic than shitting on women yeah yeah yeah that's my official stance

okay um he brings up his divorce on the first date i like that he's disclosing i like that he's disclosing uh-huh i like this is disclosing i also feel like it's it's an interesting thing by age because i feel like yeah yeah if you get divorced in your 20s to some extent that's just an x that's just an x that you went too far with like that's like you you know what i mean like you did that's so funny you know but like you can leave that completely in the past if you're in your 30s or 40s and you're divorced like what does that mean how much damage do you have do you have children where's

your ex-wife is she in the picture like what's going on here are you co-parenting like there's so much you need to know so i feel like and so okay if you're in your 20s um yeah i don't even think it needs to come up but do you stay do you stay i think you stay i think you stay i think a lot of people i joke that like um that maybe that divorcees are where it's at because it's like a guy who like has been to therapy so like I think I think a nice divorce say is fantastic so I think um I'm a little confused by the talking in the walk I think he needs to talk and you should stay and listen yes yeah totally no I completely agree cool okay Liz do you have any thought any notes I don't think so I agree with all those takes especially like divorce by age like they do

mean totally different things at different ages yeah and I think it's also like a different level of trauma i'm like were you with were you with the same woman for like 20 years and then you got divorced and like did you have kids did you not have kids why did you not have kids like there's just like so many more questions like i had a couple i had a couple friends get divorced in our 20s and it was like okay this is an ex-boyfriend that you have nobody cares absolutely yes that's so funny we talk about that all the time we're like what what were you what were you doing yeah you made you made a you made a mistake that's fine we all make mistakes like you did not need to marry this man you should have just dated and broken up and you did unfortunately

there was legal paperwork very expensive mistake okay next one he's never heard of lube walk didn't that happen to you amelia yeah that was the last one i added i'm pretty sure i was like i have to jump to this one yeah no that was episode two a sad dry hand job if anybody wants to go listen to it but yeah i had to i had to explain i had to explain what lube was to this man oh my god i can't wait to go listen to this episode and then he ended up slut shaming me for knowing what lube was i'm like i should be reverse slut shaming you and then i did on my podcast he should also be thanking you and begging you not to tell anyone yeah please don't tell anyone I don't know what lube is like you don't even know what it is yeah I'm embarrassed for him

yeah has he seen any movies right has he been to a grocery store like they're in the pharmacy aisle you know what I mean like the effort this man went to to not know what it is is impressive yeah yeah in the worst way I was I mean no no shame to this man I'm pretty sure he was a virgin the only shame came with him pretending like he wasn't you know what i mean it's like just yeah don't pretend like you have all this sex yeah because also not knowing what lube is is like tell me you're a virgin without telling me you're a virgin right absolutely yeah exactly yeah 100 okay let's just do a couple more at my shows you oh yeah yeah so after the show at the after party i want people mingling so i have like a human bingo board the other thing that's so sweet is

like I love these like community aspects it's actually a previous bachelorette of mine was like you need more um ways to get people to mingle mingle and so she made me this little bingo board and so I'll change up the prompts sometimes but it's like find someone who's poly find someone who's uh jerked off today like all kinds of stuff and so you go up to people and you ask and if you get bingo I give you a bottle of lube that's so fun I was gonna ask how you come up with all these ideas it sounds like it's like a good like community like there's a community aspect of it that really feeds into yeah that bingo board is totally tam we love tam and she is living with she moved in with a guy that she met uh the night of her show yeah wow we love tam so sweet it's

really sweet when people are like i see you're doing a lot of work for this she literally told me i mean she's the sweetest she was like you changed my life and i'm like what she's like i met my boyfriend that night i met multiple friends who have become good friends so she's like let me help you she plans the after party in portland it's really yeah it's amazing i really love all these contestants except for special that one my head's a block i mean that's crazy for you to have met so many people like so many contestants and this one there's just like one bad apple like there's this one and i have a nickname for him and it's like it's just so hard not to use it but i have i have there's one yeah there's one there's i mean there's others but he was really the worst

of like where i was like bro get over yourself what's the nickname well it includes his real name so i can't oh understood yeah after we hit the stop recording button yeah like there's no way like i understand that he's never gonna see this but like if he did he'd know it's him based on this name you know right yeah yeah so i want to protect my health and safety yeah how were there more scenarios there's there's a few more i'm gonna we'll power through these um okay he lives with his ex but it's temporary walk no no you can you can meet him again when he's no longer living with her yeah okay i agree with i agree with that you know i was thinking i was like is there a scenario no my god can you imagine i mean i've had some shit but not that okay i'm

ask you one more yeah um he brings up finances in a vague ominous way and i'll just let you decide what that means can we hear it in a sentence talk get him talking let's learn about his finances let's learn let's learn yeah i'm so fascinated by someone who like brings up finances at all early on yeah yeah yeah yeah although maybe we should i feel like there's so many taboos that we should get rid of yeah i agree this is my i think we should all be very comfortable sharing our like if we work at the same company we should all share salaries with each other they try to make a hundred percent they try to make you feel bad about it but it's illegal for them to tell you to not talk about it it's because it's for themselves like they are

trying that is capitalism trying to be like i'm gonna pay someone more or less or whatever and if We shame them for talking about it. They won't find out. I have a friend, a woman, of course, who found out that her male counterpart was making, it was either $20,000 or $30,000 more per year. But it was a big number. I mean, as a comedian, I think that's a big number.

That is a huge number. Yeah, she found out. She was like, and then she quit. Yeah. I think people should absolutely be talking about it. I also think you should meet your date's friends immediately. This shit about like, you have to, no, meet them immediately yeah yeah you can learn so much about someone yeah absolutely yeah that data

yes see that was one of the first things that i like really loved about my boyfriend was that his friends loved him so much and they were all really good dudes i was like this this is it's such a it's such an important data point you guys wish your first date was a double date so yeah that's true like a couple friends include i love that amelia's um a love story with her boyfriend is very cute it sounds like it's from a movie wait but now I want to know it she matched with so uh for a while Amelia was on the dating apps and my boyfriend recently said he's like I kind of miss the boyfriend of the week it was fun to keep up with your dating adventures yeah um she had she had matched with a profile that was like a shared profile of two guys and it was

really funny she sent me a screenshot and I was like you need to match with him like that looks hilarious and then uh I was like ask this friend to go with you because she's single too and at the last minute one of the friends was like I have to cancel because I ended up like becoming more serious with someone that I recently met so we're gonna have our other friend substitute in and that is now Amelia's boyfriend so the substitute on the date is now Amelia's boyfriend and it was like he went in totally blind and he was gonna say no because he was in finals at the time for his masters and so he was like about he was like i'm just gonna text back and say no once i'm done walking my dog and then they added him to the group chat before he got home thank god because

i wouldn't have met him if he would have been like wait wait wait so how many people are on this group chat and then one of the guys dropped and the replacement is your now boyfriend oh that's cute yeah yeah there were there were four of us like trying to figure out a time what happened with the other couple they went on another date there's nothing mean to say my friend was carrying the date and he's happy now and he's in a really he found someone that is okay with carrying the date okay it's interesting because like this the problem that i'm solving is when men won't shut the fuck up but the other problem is when men need to get a personality yeah yeah my barometer is like you need to have thoughts on frogs like you need to have like crazy fucking random ass thoughts and

if you don't like what are we doing like you need to be curious about the world and you need thoughts on frogs or just like any random ass shit i don't have to understand the shit you need to have it you need to have thoughts a lot of them they don't have thoughts that's i don't know i never thought about it like why yeah think about think about things all the time yeah the way that i am there's like 47 000 conversations in my head at any given moment because i have undiagnosed adhd and if you don't oh and then i found out on tiktok that there's some people who don't have an internal monologue at all did you see when that went viral crazy yeah for a minute so peaceful i was like oh my god these people are meditating all the time but i was so fascinated they exist i was like

they're people that have no internal monologue my mind is still blown by this sometimes i think about like is it just empty nothing like i think about nothing that's so i'm so jealous i'm jealous but i'm also like this is the source of my entire personality so like yeah yeah no me too like no absolutely yeah sometimes when i'm high my internal monologue will sound a little bit like two sports commentators talking to each other that's about what i'm doing it is kind of funny wait i recommend trying it that's like adorable and she's going for the pan what's she gonna cook up next wait that's so fucked in the head i love it i love it that's the cutest thing it's just a change of pace change the channel i'm sorry but that's cuter than amelia's

meet cute it's cuter than amelia's meet cute i'm so sorry honestly yeah you're rivaling it a little bit yeah you're like narrating as your sportscaster oh yeah if you get a little bored i'm gonna even if i'm not bored i'm gonna do it i'm gonna start doing it in a minute take a couple mushrooms now yeah i don't even need to yeah okay cool cool cool could do it ali thank you so much for oh my god thank you guys coming on send me your singles we will we will uh well and we'll be in the audience not to speak for you Amelia no I'll be in the audience but I want to be awake I want to be a wingman can you plug or do you need to plug anything do you want to plug anything oh no I do marketing is a fickle

beast please love is in blind.com you can apply to be a contestant you can nominate your friends against their will they do not have to consent because it's just step one so apply nominate your friends or just grab tickets to watch at love is in blind.com if you want to see clips first. I'm Allie underscore Goldie across social media. So that's A-L-L-I underscore G-O-L-D-I on all platforms. Great. Amazing. Cool. Thank you so much, Allie. You're so fun. I'm so excited to meet you in person. Thank you. I can't wait to meet you guys. Yeah, it's going to be a blast. There's like so much more we have to discuss and I have so many questions, but also I'm going to see a show and I have to start my LA commute. Oh my gosh. Good for you. Bon voyage.

Yeah, oh, oh, yeah