The Hoely Hour - E192 A NyQuil Ego Death

Episode Date: July 19, 2024

All the cool kids are getting covid! Liz has a weed/Nyquil/My Big Fat Greek Wedding-assisted realization about what her life motivtors have been. We discuss Trump’s (set up? inside job?) assassination attempt, the Cody and Tana situation, and we read a two emails from y’all (one of which made Amelia fully sob). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Seriously. I do think that it's, so this is going to sound, I can't believe I'm about to say this fucking sentence, but there's a Macklemore song. That is the most Seattle thing. Welcome to The Holy Hour, a podcast about sex, relationships, mental health, and everything in between. I'm Amelia Sampson. And I'm Liz Ball.

Follow us on Instagram and TikTok at The Holy Hour. I'm on Instagram and TikTok at Amelia Sampson. And I'm on Instagram and TikTok at Liz Ball So Hard. You can also watch us on YouTube or listen ad-free on Patreon at patreon.com slash theholyhour. Check out our merch at theholyhour.com and email us your spicy stories at holyhourpodcast at gmail.com. How's it going? Well, I have COVID, but I've already had it, so that's why she's over. Yeah, Amelia recently got over COVID.

I'm on the tail end here. Yeah. I think you can just hear it in my voice. yeah but you seem more alive than yesterday yeah yesterday was a struggle my brain was not working at all that's so my brain didn't work for the whole two weeks i had covid the brain fog was crazy it also kicked around for like weeks after i got over covid my brain fog it was horrible i was like am i ever gonna recover fully from this i i had so much shit i needed to do today that i was like you just i can't i need to go turn on my fog lights yeah and just roll through it

the brain fog is one of those things that like when people were first talking about covid brain fog i was like okay yeah that just sounds like how you feel when you have a cold yeah and then you get it it's horrible you have like no thoughts no it's kind of peaceful it is peaceful yeah i'm i'm like back to 80 percent today but that's good like we said earlier that's a b brain fog was bananas and then i have lost most of my taste and smell which didn't happen the the first and only other time i had covid like same two three years ago the strain is an asshole yeah it's just it is running rampant it really is everybody has it a lot of people that everybody's getting it all the cool kids have it i'm sorry i'm fun people that haven't had covid before or like that have

absolutely had it by now but like haven't had have been asymptomatic i know multiple people that are like this is the first time i'm like feeling covid because this strain is just everyone alive i slept for like 40 over 40 hours over the weekend that's amazing it was really nice we should all sleep for 40 hours over the weekend honestly highly recommend but uh let me tell you this is probably the only topic i'll have for the whole podcast so i'll just go in into it um i started telling you a little bit about this before we were recording so last night uh mr liz and i were watching my big fat greek wedding which um i've seen it one other time when i was probably like 10 i have zero memory of any of it i just know that i saw it so jealous you

got to see it like basically yeah it was basically the first time one of my favorite movies of all time it is such a cute fucking movie yeah um mr liz was like this is giving me anxiety because listen movie's been out for a very long time so i'm not spoiling anything if you haven't seen it um there's not really any conflict no in it which i fucking loved yeah i loved that there was no real conflict it was like there's no villain yeah and and it was just so much more real to life like i feel like we're constantly having to like experience storylines that are like there's conflict to overcome and like some sort of dumb miscommunication and just like the the main characterization that we then apply to our own lives as a result of like constantly consuming

media that's entertaining in this way yeah it just like detracts from just the entertainment of your everyday life you know what i'm saying totally i might not be making any fucking sense but it was just nice to watch a movie where the characters behaved normally yes you know yeah um and there wasn't any villain or conflict or anything egregious um and it was just like a sweet kind of love story um and i wouldn't even say the main story was the love story between the woman and the love interest it was between like her and her family yeah like how it really was how she kind of accepts her her greek roots that she's kind of been resentful for her whole of her whole life yeah and they also embrace her as being a little bit different and a little bit

more introverted and it was just like a really sweet story that main actress wrote it oh really oh i love that yeah um mr liz and i were like that it's that fucking guy because we just watched sex in the city yeah he's adrian he's amazing oh and the his best friend in the movie um the bald guy uh-huh is her husband in real life oh that's so sweet another little fun behind the scenes fact i wonder how he felt he uh i think he was totally fun recasted yeah it was totally fun he's probably like you need to you need to cast someone that is debonair yeah i think he he knows um but yeah no i fucking love that movie i was telling liz when she was texting me about this my family and i have quoted my big fat greek wedding for so long that like when me and frank

just re-watched it a few months ago i didn't realize like just how many quotes came from that movie like there's genuinely really funny and it's a pg movie like what a crowd pleaser it's so good you just don't see movies like that anymore no um but so we i was like have you seen this and he was like no and I was like I've only seen it once I know it's like such a very loved movie he's like I'm excited to watch it but he was he went to bed before the ending and he was like I'm too stressed like he started doing stuff around the house because he kept thinking like something bad was gonna happen he's like there's gonna be conflict they're building it up too much and I was like that's so funny because uh I kept trying to predict what was gonna happen

like when they go on their date and he was like you're greek like i'm gonna take you to this greek restaurant it's amazing and then she's like um i was like oh she's gonna go and her family's gonna embarrass her or something and he's like she should just tell him that that's her family's restaurant and then she does yeah and then he was like oh oh god what's gonna happen now so anyways um so good i fucking love that i'm just like smiling thinking like hearing you talk about and it's such a good movie yeah and then they made like four other ones and i'm like oh i didn't see the rest i haven't either i don't want to i'm like just you know just leave leave a good thing just let a good thing just well hollywood can never do that you know they need to that's why

there's like 10 shreks um so all this in mind you know we're watching this and i had taken half an edible i also have covid because i was like what's a little gummy you know it'll be fine yeah and um I was feeling I was vibing I was I was laughing and giggling on my my half a gummy and I was like you know what I want to keep the buzz going so I'm gonna eat the other half this is probably an hour later which normally is fine but I have COVID yeah and then I was like okay now it's time to go to bed I'm gonna take NyQuil because of the COVID symptoms so then I'm just like absolutely blasting off I felt like I had taken Molly or something like I was like really happy and my heart was also pounding and I was like you know what now is a good time for me to get out my journal because

I need to like write down all of these thoughts that I'm having fuck yeah good for you but it's because I was like getting ready and I was thinking about my big fat Greek wedding and just like what a sweet movie that was and I I especially love that like we get to see this character kind of like she gives herself a makeover and it's not like some big like I'm gonna get the guy like she just is doing it for herself she's like stepping outside of her comfort zone she is like just trying to like it's it's it's what we all do you know we all have we're like you know what i'm gonna change my hair yeah and i'm gonna i'm gonna start um laminating my eyebrows just like little things that we do to make ourselves feel better and like we've all been in a frump

before yeah so i just love that she like is doing this self-exploration for herself yeah and you know maybe it was inspired by this handsome man that she saw and but it doesn't really seem like that yeah yeah no it doesn't it seemed more like she was just like i can't just like keep doing this loop yeah i'm 30 and i i need something to change yeah she like starts working at her aunt's company yeah in computers yeah she starts going to going to uh classes for it too and then yeah it's just really sweet yeah it's a cool it's like a coming of age movie in a way that's different yeah than what we normally see exactly it's the fucking best i think watching it at in my 30s too kind of gives me like a different perspective of it as well um yeah so it was

just like a really like cute movie so i was thinking about that and then i just kind of had this realization um i i need to reference another conversation i was having to make this storyline makes sense of the experience i was having um a few weeks ago i was talking to mr liz about how spite has always been a huge motivator for me um and not in a way like i was analyzing how i actually experience spite and it's not that i wish negatively on the people that i'm like doing things out of spite like i'm doing things to spite them yeah does that make sense like it's like um the feeling of being underestimated and i don't wish poorly on any of those people that have made me feel like small or underestimated um it's just that i want to prove

that person wrong yeah and i who's to say they even ever actually fucking felt like that you know it is a projection yeah so spite has just been like such a motivator for me for so long and then i've just grown out of it you know i've grown out of really like feeling spiteful or using spite as a motivator and i was kind of expressing that to mr liz because i was like well now i don't really know like spite was my motivator to go to the gym and get like ripped and like spite was my motivator to move away from Seattle and like do really well at work because I was underestimated at my job and by my partner like it was just like a really big push for me and it feels good too in the moment and it can last a really long time and that's just kind of always been the type

of person I am yeah um like and then after going to therapy and just also maturing you it's just not really it doesn't have the same spice so I was like well now I don't really know what to replace that feeling with to be as big of a motivator and damn I was kind of analyzing this feeling as I'm getting ready for bed post my big fat Greek wedding you know and I had just like this moment of like full appreciation for um for my ex I was like I would not have any of the things that I have right now if like he didn't end our relationship because I was so blinded by my own stubbornness that I would have stayed in that relationship I would have married him it would have ended inevitably and then i would have never had the stuff that i have now like i wouldn't have

moved here i wouldn't have met you i wouldn't have met mr liz and like experienced this like life-changing relationship yeah you know yeah i know that sounds kind of dramatic but i was like oh it's true this is well and this stupid movie made me like think about that because i was like they have a really well it's not stupid well yeah first of all i'm just kidding it was mostly yeah your little like weed journaling moment your nyquil weed journaling exactly well that's when i decided to get my journal i was like i need to write this down because i want to remember feeling this way yeah like where i did that i felt genuine like full circle love and appreciation for him making that decision because i wouldn't have made it that's a huge breakthrough and and

to have yeah and to have zero zero feelings of spite or resentment there like that's I don't know that's huge it's a goal to eventually feel that way absolutely and dude that's big because I was also just like I had thought about like um just my relationship with Mr. Liz and like how great our relationship is and how sometimes it can like I can self-sabotage that by feeling like I don't deserve it and and looking for problems you know yeah I'm like looking for something to solve when instead of just like enjoying it yeah it's also like I think it's a very self-protective thing to do yeah absolutely if I can get ahead of the problem before it's a problem then I can't then nothing can hurt me I think it's just like a very basic like normal

human thing to do well and if something is so good that just leaves it further to fall so if you're like doing these things to to subtly self-sabotage and you can create a predictable outcome for yourself even if it's not one that you want in some way you feel like you have control over it yeah um instead of just like fully embracing and appreciating this thing that you have to the fullest extent that you have it and i was also just kind of like the the best way for me to show appreciation for the life that i do have is to like fucking enjoy it yeah does that make sense yeah it's like because it's very easy to be your own worst enemy and stand in your way and I think that's a really hard thing to like accept is like I'm the thing standing in my way of

my own success yeah you know yeah and that's how it is I think for most people it's like you're the one stopping yourself you're the one limiting yourself not all the time but like with little things so if I'm like I really want to like get this done at home and then I find myself just like laying on the couch yeah and then I'm like well I shouldn't feel guilty for relaxing uh and then it's like yeah well yeah no you shouldn't but you will feel better when you do this thing that you wanted to do yes so like do it i don't know yeah just kind of having a confrontation with that self-sabotage self-sabotaging piece in my in my brain that's amazing i mean no it's i think that there's like a very everyone should get covid and then take an edible and then take

of nyquil have an ego death yeah have an ego death after watching my big fat yes high on nyquil and weed seriously i do think that it's so this is gonna sound this i can't believe i'm about to say this fucking sentence but there's a macklemore song that is the most seattle thing that he has with kesha called the good old days and like the the chorus is like one day we're gonna look back and realize like that we're like currently living in like the best time of our lives and that's such like that's like the folly of man to like have to look back and be like fuck I like I didn't enjoy this like amazing life that I had when I had it and now I'm like you know whatever like busier or like you know I don't have as much time as I used to have or whatever but

then you're going to look back on the time that you're like fuck and wish that you were like appreciating that time and it's like as life goes on it's like I feel like we have like hindsight in 2020 when in reality like the focus should be on like what you're saying like enjoying what you're experiencing right now and just like letting yourself enjoy and not having it be driven by something negative like spite yeah it's like or like looking for something that is wrong or annoys you or whatever yeah because it's like that is such a common thing for us to do is just yeah i mean we're all we're humans yeah and our brains are just kind of like literally wired to be looking for things to protect ourselves from anxiety is as a useful thing it's a defense

mechanism that is just kind of on steroids for a lot of us but it is like those things happen because our brains are trying to protect itself and also like there are ways to honor that and not let it consume you entirely i don't know it's before i went on my first date gratitude's a hell of a drug fuck man that's so fucking true you shouldn't have to take weed and nyQuil and have covid to experience gratitude my anti-drug remember those commercials soccer's my anti-drug it was like a big anti-drug yes yes um uh before i went on my first date with frank the the blind double date um i was talking to my therapist about how i didn't really want to go on the date because i was like i don't know it's like what am i gonna like open up the door

for like getting hurt again you know and it's like she's like why are you can't stop yourself from like experiencing joy just because you're concerned about the potential of it not going well and i was like bitch don't fucking tell me i live my life but i was like crying yeah you're so right oh my god what are you saying i love you i hate you but it's true it's like you know i think that we just were such like self-protective creatures in a way that existing is a exhausting being a human is fucking weird girl so confusing it's so confusing anyway so i'm happy that you had that breakthrough also having gratitude for your ex or like yeah not having any maybe one day i'll get there i don't i don't know and like yeah i'm sure he i don't know has good shit going on

too yeah i don't know totally i don't know and i don't need to know it's it is interesting to watch how i've probably said this on the podcast i've definitely said it to you off the podcast but like when i first broke up with my ex you were like one day you're gonna wake up and realize that you just like care less and i was like she's wrong it's the first thing she's gonna be wrong about i'm gonna care so much forever yeah i'm gonna i'm gonna wake up crying every morning but it's like it doesn't feel like that in the moment it feels impossible this pain is all-consuming yeah but then it's like yeah nearly unmanageable one day you wake up and you're just like feels like a little less heavy on your chest and then it's just like you know like oh that's

when it's starting and so when i started to feel i i don't i still have like a little bit of a little bit of hate toward my ex but yeah like i do feel gratitude in a way for all the reasons that you've said like i wouldn't have anything in my life that i have if he hadn't had like destroyed me the way that he did and like you i would have stayed in that relationship out of just like fear of experiencing something different because like it's scary going out into the world and being like everything that i've known is now being torn apart yeah even if it's what you know is bad exactly that's ptsd yeah well technically cptsd oh shit complex post-traumatic stress disorder so it might be like a little bit of stockholm syndrome oh yeah but anyway so yeah i don't know

it's there's there is a my brain feels like a can that's being cracked open you know what i mean yeah you're peeling it back slowly the can like the tab for the can yeah hell yeah where you hear that crack you hear a little you're slowly when you first open it and then your cats run yeah you're like it's not for you it's a can of beans yeah like fuck you no they're like i'll eat lady yeah like just let me smell it anyway thank you for yeah sharing i just needed to um be like every white guy that's ever done mushrooms and explain my ego death on a podcast i love that honestly that is um relatable i think for a lot of people too not i mean not the ego death nyquil weed ego death but the like that having like a moment like yeah just having all

the pieces of like different thoughts you've been having yeah together in a nice way um it's really a beautiful and even before we were recording i was telling amelia like i'm definitely coming out of like a chronic depression um I'm fully transitioned off of my antidepressants I feel great that's so good that's not to say y'all the mood swings were rough the mood swings were Mr. Liz deserves compensation damn I didn't know that I wasn't seeing any of that I mean it was pretty like it wasn't like um like I would have a really bad mood swing and then you know maybe an hour later i'd simmer down and be like whoa that was that was wild so sorry about that yeah liz is back that was patricia shut up patricia

i'm glad that it's like gone well though outside of those mood swings yeah yeah i maybe one day i'll be off prozac i feel um maybe maybe a little bit of stockholm syndrome there too i'm like i will take this for forever if it's working then don't it's working great but it's also like you know these things are the the goal is to come off of them but yeah some people don't and i'm maybe i will be one of those people that doesn't but i don't know who knows i'm so scared of going back to how i felt before holy shit i will say any medication that you transition off of to just be prepared for some changes some mood swings god bless god but just know that they're temporary i just like astral projected into like you sundowned sundowned into like

yeah i don't even know i don't even know what just happened speaking of sundowning should we address uh that donald trump was shot jesus christ i don't know why what you just said scared me so much because it sounds like sundowning could be so many things yeah that's so true yeah damn dude got shot there's like so much shit there that is just um weird there's so many aspects of it that like dude i sent you that clip of candace owens dude yeah we're a weird timeline i was like she's not wrong yeah it's a crazy timeline when uh candace owens is right or like you agree with candace owens yeah um so fucking weird candace owens was pointing out just like how every like if a political figure especially the president is giving any sort of like speech or addressing

a group like the secret service is there days before inspecting every area of and then i'm also like okay how fucking crazy do i want to be like do i want to be putting on a full tinfoil had and being like this is staged 100 or i mean it might be there's no the the issue with donald trump outside of you know every all the everything is that it's so hard to know what is he is such a master at swaying the media and the public that it wouldn't surprise me if this is something that i'm like is he did i think that he's just like the perfect puppet he i think that he is really he knows how his base thinks like and he knows what gets them amped and like being shot at and like there are some people that think that like there was a precision shooter that like they can

shoot like an earring off of someone's ear you know like that's how good they are so like people are thinking like oh maybe they hired someone but then what they just like killed this thomas crooks character like for the hell of it or like well and then the someone in the audience died and two people were in critical condition until like yeah like i think yesterday now they're in they're stable but it's there was people caught strays so it's like yeah but then also there's so many aspects of it that are like like candace owens was saying the secret service is there days before that was the only rooftop close by like and they saw the ladder there there was a ladder there the night before that he brought so he's he like he that was it was sitting there they they would

have seen it and there are so many there's all these videos of people in the crowd being like there's a dude with a rifle on the roof yeah the cops are like what where it's the secret service i mean that doesn't surprise me with the cops no the cops are always like especially in like you know a town that like isn't used to seeing this kind of like crowd yeah but the secret service i was watching theo von and um andrew santino i think cheeto santino is his name on instagram i don't know i think his name's andrew um talking about this and they were saying like the secret service is mostly downtime you know like they have these events and that's like the majority of their job so for them to like just miss this going on is so it's so not something that would

ever happen yeah and then for them to allow him to pop his head up and like give like a fist bump and like fight they you watch videos of like the nixon it wasn't nixon assassination attempt they like jumped on him and kept him down why would they let his head stay up he they let him ask for his shoes three times they let him go for a photo op it's just it doesn't make any sense yeah it is misaligned with how i also everyone well i was like how come no one in the background is freaking out yeah and then mr liz was like well what if the gunshots weren't that loud what if like I don't know like they didn't know what was going on I was like that's fair but I don't know if I if I heard gunshots I'm fucking booking it if I hear hell no if somebody like drops

something loud in a mall I'm like hitting the ground you know what I mean like I'm not surprised that it happened no I also don't really care which that's also a weird experience yeah it's like how i'm surprised it took this long yeah and then i'm also at like too too many things i'm just like i i don't how much how much do you want me to fucking care about you know i don't really care about this people are already getting that tattoo of him that's weird yeah that's yeah it's a badass picture i hate to say it i hate to say it but that photo op that maybe they planned it out worked well it's a really cool photo and i hate that but it all feels like a little too perfect and maybe that's why you don't care honestly because it just feels a little contrived i

thought about it too and i was like if this happened to bite and i also wouldn't care i'd be like thank god honestly if either of them got taken out i'd be like thank fucking god take out both of them i know that sounds really bad and i'm gonna be on a watch list after this but i'm just like you are not the only one no we need yeah it's a start over and then all everything on the internet is a fucking joke i'm like people are over it yeah they don't we do not care i saw somebody tweet like this thomas matthew crooks guy must be the most universally hated cunt on the planet right now because it's like the republicans hate him for trying to kill trump the democrats hate him for missing you know like now it's like people don't know if trump's going

to be able to do any sort of events after this so there's also there was like a the u.s government like foiled a plan that um iran had to kill trump separate from the assassination attempt on that same day which is another thing security should have been massively high there yeah if there were already like some risks associated with him being there uh-huh anyway regardless it does feel like this kid is a pawn in some way he seems like too perfect of a character for what he did yeah and he got kicked out of his rifle club because he was so bad he was such a bad shot they were like we can't do anything with you this is the president damn in broad daylight from the closest roof i mean he still grazed him yeah allegedly allegedly i think they put the

yeah when he was down i saw a picture of trump with his ear wrapped and someone said when you order a pillow from timu and i know this should so good like this should be serious but i just can't be no there's too many like i don't give a fuck about this when there's a genocide happening this man his whole campaign his whole platform is around inciting violence on other people it it's yeah of course it came back around to him of course it did and i want the same anger about like elementary schools being shot up yeah and it not be like for it to be god's plan that like trump survived this is a fucked up stupid ass shit your god is a dumb ass to save trump and not like all of these kids

in uvalde like it just there's no there's all these videos of these people at the rally like this is your fucking fault talking to the media and you know it's wild to like you know go through every avenue without actually getting to the actual problem here yeah you know yeah okay I gotta stop talking about it I'm gonna become irreparably mad you gotta find your my big fat Greek wedding happy place I guess I do I just was like this is so relevant like do we need to mention it yeah we absolutely do there's another couple of things that we should mention that are relevant um the Cody Co Tana Mongeau stuff yes we have to talk about it I was gonna ask you if you wanted to talk about that I do and I would like to be the first to say how I mean I've been

such a Cody Co stan from a career perspective for years for like 10 years I've like wanted to be just like Cody Co like from as a business as a businessman I gotta call that out now because now there's all of this stuff coming out about if you don't know him and Tana Mongeau hooked up when she was 17 and he was 25 nine years ago and he had been warned by gabby hannah that she was underage when they were like making out at playlist live and he was like oh my god thank you so much for telling me i didn't know and then he still went and had sex with her and tana has been talking about this for a while but she just did like a live show for her podcast um and she was she said that the smallest dick she ever hooked up with was cody co and she's like i can say that i was 17

so now it's had this like new resurgence of people being aware because then people are like doing the math yeah and they're like yeah if you were 17 he was 25 and then she did address it on someone else's podcast oh i wasn't sure if it was her podcast yeah um but she was like i was 17 he was 25 which is a crime um yeah so yeah yeah and she had a good point and i completely agree that if this was any other youtuber it would probably she wouldn't be being so victim blamed as much as she is now because cody co is so universally loved and she's so universally not loved i mean that's why her podcast is called canceled yeah you know she's she has been a character of controversy in the youtuber world like that's how her career started yeah but she's

also a person and she's an adult you know like yeah i don't know if you have seen any of um uh what is her name blonde lady trisha paytas yeah have you seen any of trisha paytas's like recent videos uh no i have a few of them saved but i haven't watched any of them she is just i don't know she's like so happy she was like I was had undiagnosed um BPD and a borderline um and she wasn't like on the right medications and she's like this is how my life has changed so much she's just like it was just really like touching to hear her talk about how much she's changed and um i don't know a lot of people just like grow up and mature and that's also happening to tana yeah you know and it's people are like definitely blaming tana they're like who cares

it's tana yeah she lies about stuff all the time slut shaming her and um that doesn't change the fact that she was a 17 year old and he was 25 yeah and the the other fucked up piece of all of this as if there needed to be anything else fucked up is how silent he's been about it for years it's not that this just resurfaced like a week ago like this has been kind of bubbling around last time this surfaced he announced his proposal the next day so everyone forgot about it and then there's just been so many instances that it's come up but then like something else has like taken over the news cycle and so and I understand how difficult it must be for him to like be so ashamed of this horrible disgusting decision he made when he was younger and hold space for that

fact because that is you have to hope that people are able to change yeah what's the point of holding people accountable if they don't change you you need to change you need to hope that people are going to change yeah and allow them to yeah and also like brushing it under the rug and who knows maybe he's preparing it might there might be something tied up in like legal about this you know who knows yeah but like for like him just to he's been censoring his youtube comments um or at least his team has but not his instagram comments so like you go through his youtube comments and it's like there's nothing about tana and his instagram is all about tana so the idea that there's no nobody's saying anything on youtube is oh people love me unrealistic yeah so it's like

you know that there's censorship going on so he's aware of it yeah but it's like you know there is I think people forget again the nuance of like him being you know a person that's also like trying to manage how to go about all of this so there's that piece of it and also you did a fucked up thing this person who you did the fucked up thing to is being is dealing with this solo really like she's she's the only one that's like in the public eye about it right now and he's just kind of like faded into the background so i don't know i have high hopes for him i really like to think that he's going to come out and say something but you but you don't know like we don't know these people i have a parasocial relationship with this man yeah and i mean

they could also be talking about it separately yeah and i mean like okay i get like when i think about it it's like sure maybe tana obviously was like enthusiastically consenting to this hookup but the part where it's a crime is she was underage right she can't legally consent like you're you are stupid when you're 25 yeah but you know that someone who's 17 is even more stupid than you are so that's a situation where you as a an adult need to be like thinking about that and be the one making the right decision yeah um and i don't know yeah it's just like i when i think about it too i'm like okay let me remember when i was 25 what was i doing with my life who was i friends with like i can't think of any man i know who at age 25 would like want to fuck a 17 year

old yeah they'd be like you're 17 get the fuck out of here right i think most guys honestly if you are over the age of 21 you should not date or talk to or be interested in anyone who also isn't 21 yeah even 18 feels like i just feel like once you're 21 and you can legally like go to the bars and stuff like you're gonna have way less in common with people who are underage yeah yeah but even even the age gap difference between 17 and 25 is like night and day you know huge and i don't know i just think that yeah it would be really nice to um hear an apology yeah um and like some onus over this this decision totally that he made yeah um and i also think that owning that and like apologizing for that decision it is gonna take a toll yeah and you have to like be willing

to risk losing that to do the right thing yeah once you open up that can of worms there's no clothes in it too once you're like I did do this thing but it's like yeah it's the only way for anyone to like because it's now been corroborated like there's all these interviews with Gabby Hannah in the past like basically like saying that this did happen without saying his name but like the timelines all line up with what Tana's saying so it's like it's out there now yeah it's still alleged but it's we know so it's like then the next step is just owning up to it i also wondered how how many times has this happened to tana a lot i'm sure because how many people have taken advantage of tana she said when she was 17 the reason that she doesn't feel

any sort of like um trauma associated with this is because she's like she's like i'm a comparative person and so much worse has happened to me that like i don't hold any trauma for that with him she's like but i mean like it is fucked up that it happened yeah so because he he he he should have known better yeah well he did know better he was even warned he's a smart guy too yeah i saw a clip of someone like before i came over someone was like talking about the situation and he was like you know i just want him to like fucking own up to this that he did this but um under that the search was promising young woman and I was like damn if that ain't a comparison yeah like if you don't know if you haven't seen promising young woman like they purposely cast beloved

male actors to prove that even the men that you like admire most can be complicit in things that harm women so and i do feel like there are ways for people to right their wrongs and really show that they've changed and i just we don't see it enough because not enough people actually become better people they just say that they are yeah so it's just i don't know it's bleak it's really it's shitty it was like one of those things i was like i really hope cody co doesn't get canceled because i just have so much stock you've literally said that on this podcast yeah it's him in Tom Hanks and if Tom Hanks oh man if if anything comes out about that man I'm just going into my doomsday bunker I'm not coming out I trust one man and it's Mr. Liz um should we

read this email which one the one that made me cry when you read it earlier oh no the okay yes should we read the one that made you cry at the end yes okay um so we have a couple of listener emails this first one is titled predicament about abortion hi lovelies i have a predicament i'm hoping you can help me with i've been seeing a guy for about a month things have been okay i'm struggling to decide on whether i'm overreacting and self-sabotaging or if i'm justified in being turned off by this the issue in question i've never wanted kids and have recently been considering getting sterilized instead of an iud i told him this he didn't disagree at all and supported my own decision for my body. However, one thing he said is really rubbing me the wrong

way. He said that sterilization is more humane than abortion. When I asked what he meant, he said that it would be more humane than someone getting a bunch of abortions. I understand not everyone agrees with abortion, but this is a topic I feel very strongly about. His use of the word humane is what's really bothering me. It makes me think that he really doesn't agree with abortion at all he is religious i'm not sure how much of his beliefs sway his views on abortion but either way it has me doubting whether our values are on this align are about it has me doubting whether our values on this align help me am i overreacting thank you and love the podcast it's such a good question and really made like when we were when we read this before we started recording it like

really made me think i was like no you're not overreacting and also like there are so many factors at play here that i'm that i think it's swaying how he feels i think it would be more humane for her because if someone got a lot of abortions that would definitely take a toll on your body yeah that would that would not be good for your body no um no so a sterilization in that aspect would be more humane and that it would be less torture for you and also like there's no way we were saying this when we were talking about this before like there's there's no way that people that like cis men could ever understand like everything that goes into us having to think about the potential of having an abortion they don't they never have to put their head there

they're never going to have to worry about that right so there's that aspect and then there's also the like the religious aspect like when he's been fed this way of thinking for so long like that just feels like of course he of course he thinks that way like that's going to take some time to undo um and at the same time like i said like you're so valid and feeling yeah offended by that i wonder speaking about it i wonder how much of it was like a throwaway comment to him yeah but because like yeah if that's your conditioning your whole life is like oh a abortion is wrong because it's a human life and it's wrong to take a human life away yeah right or however you want to think about it's a baby yeah um so if that's like the conditioning

he's had his entire life that could have just been like a yeah i'm pro-choice yeah but still having this kind of like belief you've never like we said he's never really had to think about it he's never really had to consider if he is going to get an abortion i i wouldn't be surprised if most men have never really considered if they got someone pregnant what like what they would do i think a lot of men that think about that or it's just like oh she'll just get an abortion yeah and that's where it ends oh okay so it's just gonna be all a woman's responsibility to bear that making that decision and endure the physical trauma and potentially emotional trauma yeah depending on how you feel about it totally it's it's such like a deeply personal thing too

yeah it really is i i honestly think like i think it was ignorance for sure yes um and it's also hard to not be mad like oh my god when roe versus wade was overturned i was like mad at mr liz for some reason she's like how dare you have a penis your fault yeah yeah fucking pissed so um i just think it's hard to kind of take a step back and be like okay i can't just like villainize this one man for like existing in patriarchy that is a privilege that he like is ever gonna fully grasp that he has hi polly yeah she's like i have some thoughts about abortions um my mom has always said to me to consider the source like if the person that's saying the the shitty thing is shitty about this all the time then that's one thing but if the person that's saying the shitty thing is like

genuinely trying to like learn and grow and like maybe the comment was a throwaway comment and maybe they didn't realize what they said then that's worth taking into consideration as well i think that's my bottom line and it might be worth having like more of a discussion about totally like abortion yeah with him to get a better idea of like where his head's at and like I mean anytime I have a conversation with Mr. Liz where like if I mean if he hurt my feelings and I want to explain it I'm never accusatory about it I think that also helps just kind of having the mindset of like I feel statements yeah like um when you said this is like how I experienced it this is how I interpreted what you said and I know you're never gonna fully understand what

it's like but like I don't know it'll give you more of an opportunity to express your views and see how aligned you actually are on things and it could be a good opportunity to educate him yeah because if he's someone who is like yeah I was raised with these religious beliefs but I don't necessarily believe them like there is always an opportunity to give people more information yes totally and that's also like a unique opportunity to have something to like use as a springboard for having the conversation like when we were talking about it you said this thing like and it made me think you know rather than just like let's sit down and have a conversation about abortion like that's such a hard conversation to have yeah so yeah i definitely i don't think

you're overreacting but i also don't think it's like worth um ending right right away yes um it's worth exploring more and we did get this email uh at the beginning of july so curious to see if more has happened since then apologies for not reading that yeah we haven't checked our email it's been a little bit of a crazy last month yeah definitely do i say crazy weird crazy yeah you have a big r crazy crazy frank started pointing that out and i'm like i do say my r words weird i like i like it evergreens it's a solid place okay then we got another email that um this one's just it's fun it made me cry when liz read it to me before do you want me to read it again yes okay i wasn't sure if you want

me to read this one as well reading asmr yeah with my uh covid voice yeah i don't know i like a little nasal bitch a little nasally little nasally uh i could just go really into the vocal fry too oh my god okay um this one says love y'all and then it just starts uh hey you beautiful badass bitches i thought hey girly was a little too i'm the other woman vibes however i've always wanted to email but i figured you guys get tons but one on one of the last episodes you said y'all haven't gotten one you y'all haven't gotten which made me sad so it's my time to shine i'm gonna leave their name and age out um i well no i'll i'll put in their age um she's 23 i've been listening since i was 19 so you guys have definitely helped me in so many ways not only relationship and sex

wise but what type of person I want to be also I love listening to old episodes and seeing how much you guys have grown also really gives me a sense not to be scared to live life and experience things you guys have no clue who I am but let me tell you guys how much I you have impacted me I use your advice to whomever will listen for example not trying to trauma dump but backstory is important my mom got caught cheating on my father after 26 years of marriage which is not anyways healthy but obviously my dad's going to be heartbroken and who knows best about what he's going through but his daughters because we experienced the trauma firsthand with my mother so I've told him the advice where you guys said your life is a painting and I explained that you

can never unlove someone but they will always be a part of your life that's just one example I I convinced my sister to listen and I love when we can talk about what you guys talk about it's definitely made our relationship strong and more open to things we wouldn't normally talk about i could honestly go on and on about you guys i wish i could get everyone to listen to y'all i truly wish y'all the best things in life because uh you more than deserve it and i hope you guys understand how much appreciation i have for what you do and then um she she wrote more but that's that's for us yeah it's our little secret thank you both liz and amelia with so much love i don't understand amelia legit started crying when i was reading it i need it at you i

I think that we specifically needed this email to come to us when it did yeah you know yeah and like it really does me like we always feel you guys listening you know because like that's why we do it it's the holy ghost feel you in our presence lord but we do like we really yeah you know but then it is also easy to feel like does anybody really care yeah you know and so like and we know that you guys do that's not anything I'm not like that's nothing on y'all you know that's just like personal shit yeah but then to hear it yeah you're we're recording every week and we're editing and we're listening to our own thoughts yeah and we're like is this just a circle jerk like who the fuck like yeah do we care yeah you know right and like so to to hear like you've

been listening for four years and like you'd like use our advice she was a child you were she was listening she was a child and like you like got your sister to listen to an episode or however many episodes and like it's just like it makes everything so much more fulfilling to know that like there's even a person that feels impacted by what we're doing you know I don't know so anyway I started crying I needed it I think the part that really got me is just her saying that it makes her less afraid to like try new things and like grow because because you can't like you i'm i feel like i don't know if this is more how like the younger generation feels like afraid to make mistakes yes because there's just you know people people get flamed online all the time yeah

you know yeah and like i guess it's a little relevant to the cody co conversation of just like leaving room for people to be better yeah and you need to do that for yourself yes you need to know that you're gonna make mistakes yeah and not be too hard on yourself you're supposed to yeah no one is born perfect and making every perfect step we don't all have taylor swift's pr shout out tree pain yeah we all don't have a tree pain in our day-to-day lives like you're gonna be stupid and do stupid things and make mistakes yeah like the important thing is that you learn from it yes and like you can change your mind i think that's the most important thing that like everyone needs a reminder like you can change your mind you can get new information

and change your mind or you can just change as a person and that changes your mind yeah and that's beautiful and that's being human and i think we're fed too often this idea like you're saying with taylor's ospr team that like everything has to be perfect all the time and you have to start young to follow your dreams and you have to yeah you know that's not most of most people most successful people no um i so that social media app i had told you about no space or whatever yeah um i signed up for it and like right when it went live and there are so many fucking like young teenagers on there and i was just like it it put into perspective for me how many teenagers are just like sharing their fucking opinions online and that's fine but like in no other

in no other world like in no way nowhere in the past has like our generation had access to or given a fuck about what a teenager thinks you know like we you don't have a teenager coming up to you to tell you their opinions no you know yeah so now with the internet like people just like commenting shit and you're like why would someone say that and it's because they're fucking like 15 yeah i guess i didn't really have like a full idea of like the age of people online you know you kind of assume like oh you you're probably like in your 20s yeah at least yeah no they're fucking teenagers dude it's wild and like maybe the teenagers just need their own internet you know so i haven't imagine i haven't posted on on no space i was like i'm fucking 32

and some of the people some of the posts from people are like why are there like old people on this app i'm like like 30 oh my god that hurts my soul i was like this is supposed to be reminiscent of my space and you guys don't even want to fucking know what my space was like in my day speaking of getting older me and liz uh went on a botox date yesterday it was pretty great i feel like i feel like kicking it i do too i was touching my forehead today and i was like i can't feel anything already i love it yeah me too um i i i can't remember if i've told this story on the podcast but i think this is a good way to wrap things up um back in the day on myspace um i think i was in fuck was i in middle school

i was either in middle school or like a freshman in high school there was a myspace page dedicated to making collages of the pretty girls at my school shut up yeah is it the pretty girls making the collages no oh it was like some random girl like fangirling over these oh my god the like the most popular girls that is the most middle school shit i've ever heard i hope it was middle it would like she would put together these like collages of like the girl and then like have their name like written on it i hope she went into graphic design and then that was totally like normal that's so bizarre right and that that's like so like teenage girl behavior yeah you know and i was thinking to myself i'm like i hope that i hope that she's gay like yeah

yeah i mean like she has to be gay yeah i mean bisexual at the very least yeah that's wild to kind of like make them into celebrities in a way yes like instead of like i i was just thinking about how like teenagers now will like fangirl and make like fan accounts for like celebrities yeah and do shit like that no this girl was just like fangirling over like the average girls at our school and i love that actually that's so interesting we need to like have more um we need to have stan accounts for just like regular people i'm gonna make a stand i think that would be so fun for yourself should we make stan accounts for each other that would be fun that would be so funny that would be so funny i would i have so much material i bet uh frank

would do it oh yeah i could totally he would he we could both think we could co we could share the stan account i love i mean i wanted frank to make a wikipedia page for me i wonder if i could make um mr liz make a stan account for me he would never he i'm he'd be like that sounds like work and i already like i basically have to teach him how to use most social media anyways so funny grandpa mr liz uh yeah so you should see if you could find that myspace page because i don't think i'll be able to um well because my space is like basically doesn't work i don't even know if i could find my my space i'll have to look um but i remember thinking as a teenager i wasn't like this is weird i was like how can i take better pictures yeah how do i end

up on this collage yeah exactly how do i become fangirled over that's so funny i never was but i also wasn't pretty enough you know if those girls thought it was weird uh i think they did but i also think they were flattered yeah i think they were like oh my god that's like crazy yeah like stop keep going what weird i'm so freaked out tell me any more about my eyes uh new profile pic yeah here you go oops i sent it to your email the high def version of it do with it what you well into photo dump anyways i'm gonna do a survey that's fucking i was just like that as bananas what a time what a time to be alive i want to know what that girl's up to i really wish you knew myspace was just honestly i think that the way that we i saw a tweet too that was

like screenshots of what taylor swift used to post on my i saw that too yeah and i was i was like the gen z mind cannot comprehend the gen z mind cannot comprehend how we would literally talk we'd be like lmao so sexy yeah with like two x's yeah and then i don't know just like the weirdest shit like quoting the weird early days of internet videos like ebom's world yeah you want the strawberry oh my god it's a very specific reference dude i gen z and i actually think it's gen alpha yeah i think it's like gen alpha now discovering digital cameras hurts my heart i know but you know what i'm like we need to bring those back because but like these fucking iphone photos are making me look like shit i can't do it but they're like i can't you want to take vintage

photos that look like this and it's just like those old like point and shoots that we'd like the pink ones that everyone had yeah i'm like fuck where the fuck is it i wonder if my mom still has my old point and shoot oh my god it hurts my heart all right all right well i think that's that's a good this is a good opportunity to end the episode i love that for us play us out amelia also we're seeing chapel rowan on friday so we're gonna come back with so much more inspiration for our outros yeah and let us know what you guys thought of the ai one oh my god please don't please don't tell us i want to know

Oh, oh, oh, oh.