The Hoely Hour - E200 Yapception (Part I)

Episode Date: September 20, 2024

IT'S OUR 200TH EPISODE! Amelia and Liz re-listen to their very first episode and reflect on what still rings true and what makes them cringe. Turns out you can change a lot in four years, but one thing that stays the same is Liz will publicly challenge any man from Amelia's childhood to a fight. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

hi hi it's our 200th episode bad bitches bad bitches bad bitches i feel like our 100th episode was not 100 episodes ago right like our 100th episode party does not feel like two years ago no it doesn't feel that long ago man time flies when you're recording a podcast you know what i love is that it was almost exactly two years ago and there's 52 weeks in a year and we take two weeks off every year yeah so it like lines lined up perfectly yeah the math cute the girls cute we our 100th episode we had mr liz as our guest that's right and we wrote vows yeah kind of i think we just like freeballed some vows you you wrote my your

vows for me rhymed they're a poem it was a king butt rap yeah that's right i can't believe it's been 200 episodes thank you all of you if you've been here since the beginning yeah that's that's wild we've this must be how joe rogan feels recording so many fucking episodes hell yeah i want the delusion of a white man it's interesting to think about how much we've like grown up on this podcast it's kind of crazy like in some ways well we're gonna listen to our first episode and comment on it i'm so excited me too i like i remember bits of what we talked about um i'm going to apologize in advance for the audio yeah and how many times we hit the table yeah we that was our first recording experience on one yeti mic a single yeti mic it's like it's

so strange to think like 200 is such a milestone like i don't know it's just like it's it feels impossible that we've done this 200 times yeah i'm like do we need to have a party yeah because we we had it's gonna be crazy somebody needs to almost die if we're gonna match our first one yeah if um if anyone's gonna come to our 200th episode party you better uh require an ambulance at some point show up with um a new prescription and way too many shots that's your price of admission just kidding don't do that yeah for legal reasons i'm joking it's probably not this drink is strong but i like it it's pretty strong okay it goes hard in the pain goes hard in the pain it goes hard in the pain

wow the intro is so naked well i realized uh oh yeah i think this because it doesn't have us talking no well i mean now it will shout out noah for this fucking intro welcome to the holy hour i'm amelia sanson and i'm liz ball we are so excited you've joined us for mass today your parents tell you it's an hour but it's actually longer yeah you can leave after communion we were like really leaning into like the sacrilegious aspect of this when we first started yeah i had like a holy bible yeah we we really just had a lot of um real yeah sacrilegious ideas and like uh not not just like concepts like yeah like themes yeah themes like the pews

uh-huh and yeah the only thing that really stuck is calling them the angels and our uh yeah the listeners are our angels we were so excited yeah we were we were so young we had no bright eyed and bushy tail so youthful fun fact i thought that i was going to vomit for the first like 30 minutes of us yeah we were pretty drunk were you were you did you think you were gonna vomit because you were nervous yeah no i don't know i mean it was before i was on prozac so i was just kind of nauseous all the time but i was like i'm about to throw up in this girl's apartment we like aren't that close yet I was so uncomfy so you can kind of like hear in my voice I'm like I was like trying so hard to like flex everything in my body the first one you went to when you

were two is still going on yeah they never end they're still there your priests do not leave they live there um we are your priests is that what we're calling it oh I kind of like that I'm into it do they have it has there ever been a woman priest i i'm sure it must be a priestess the slapping of are there actually people priestess though or is that something priestess priestess i you're your priest i we still do this we still figure things out on the fly so in the catholic church i've never seen i i think the equivalent would just be a nun and i want none of that that was a good one oh my god so this first episode is gonna be more of like an introduction to each of us and someone so our friend asked us the other day like what's this

podcast supposed to be about yeah and then we wanted to make it kind of about like we still and dating um and just like there's so many different aspects to like modern dating now right and like things that no one talks about regarding sex totally so and i think that there's like kind of a stigma around like two women talking super openly about sex but like there doesn't really be yeah it's just kind of it's a societal thing we had concepts of a plan that was my first it's a societal thing that i used to say it's a societal thing and it's biologically based every like 10 seconds like it was my job that's so like that's so like bro of you yeah it's biology no it's biology like this is also right before tiktok was as big as it is now it

was like you know we recorded this during covid yeah um so you can hear the helicopters flying around because there were protests oh yeah right down the street from where i lived at the time and um i like that we're like there's like a stigma about like girls talking about sex but if you're on tiktok it's like everyone does yeah everyone's talking about sex very blase we were early adopters we were early adopters four years ago i feel like it's not that long ago so i don't know why we thought it was so stigmatized but i guess the only thing that people really had was call her daddy yeah and that's when those two co-founders like broke up yeah so we were like we're taking the baton thanks ladies yeah it was literally like the

month that we started this was when that all went down yeah that's crazy to think about i don't know we all have such shared experiences and similar experiences but like it also feels taboo sometimes and they're like why did we never talk about this before so yeah um and i feel like once one person starts the conversation too it kind of opens up yeah it makes everybody else feel comfortable to talk about things that they wouldn't otherwise you're welcome world yeah yeah exactly go off queens i love having like discussions and kind of like building a community around conversations that no one wants to talk about yeah i think just having an open forum where people feel comfortable talking about dating and sex in particular because i think a lot of people

feel comfortable talking about dating with your friends but a lot like it's kind of nobody knows what level of comfort yeah excluding the parts about sex for someone else to make them feel like um comfortable around right and then like why do we need to cater to that like you should be able to just be yourself and talk about these things we really drove this point home we are going to get started by asking come on ladies questions about sex we get it people don't talk about sex loosen up and like you know we're gonna get into the nitty-gritty details we're not gonna spare anything wow um you know if you know us and you're an adult who watched us grow up you're gonna fucking hate this oh my god i know i'm really hoping that my parents don't yeah uh i know my

i know my parents will not listen i'll actually advise them my parents listen to the first episode i'm gonna ask you are you ready yeah um do you prefer to give or receive head um receive 100 percent I prefer to receive oral I hate myself do you still feel that way I like oh if I would rather give or receive head um I feel like it's more of like a a fun mutual experience like now I don't necessarily I think um previously I had had enough hookups where it was like never reciprocated oh you know yeah where or yeah it's just kind of yeah so it was like oh if he's taking the time to do this and he's good at it then i am enthusiastic to receive to accept yeah to accept oral sex um but listening to myself talk oh my god it feels

cringy in a very specific way um no i know i'm right there with you sister this is like yeah you're making me cringe too yeah it's embarrassing to be you no i'm just kidding now it definitely feels a little more yeah less like i'm like i would prefer to receive it yeah because you jumped at that answer oh yeah you didn't hesitate i enjoyed it a lot now i feel kind of like it's a fun part yeah you know yeah but i'm not like that's all i want right now um i also think that i i've i've gotten more creative with with giving head so it's you've gamified it's just more yeah i've gamified it i've i've leveled up my game um and reached the final boss yeah and then when you're also like in love with someone that you've been with for a long time it is uh it's more fun

and less of a chore whereas previously it felt like a little bit of a chore because you're like you want this so much that it's kind of annoying right totally yeah absolutely i get that um and i remember your answer but and it has not changed let's let's get ladies and gentlemen throat goat galore throat goat amelia samson oh my god i didn't say it you didn't need to well i mean you're about to say it i feel like both of us are sweating right now listening to ourselves i feel like i feel like it's like listening or going back and reading your old journal entries yeah and where you're like oh my god yeah i can't believe i wrote this i can't believe i felt this way but then public

publicly i mean we we received a lot of positive feedback yeah so i think we're being a little harsh on ourselves we'll see we'll see our own worst critics it's true it would be really weird if we were like god we fucking killed it this episode everyone's listening like this is trash this is the worst thing i've ever listened to i could tell a little bit about like my history with please giving and receiving yes I feel especially blessed because I don't think a lot of girls have had this experience but when I was a teenager and I had my first serious boyfriend I was like 17 turned 18 like when we started like fooling around it took us a while to get there both of us like a registered voting adult we hadn't really done anything we were both very nervous but also

very patient with each other like crazy way to think about it I was dating him I would still laugh like giggle nervously when someone tried to like do more than just kiss me so if it was just like a peck i was fine with that relatable making out i would start nervously giggling i still nervously laugh he's such a sweetheart he was so patient with me and also you know what i have to credit him for like me being a good kisser because he's like yeah he's an excellent wow liz wow don't give him that power liz and when we were dating he doesn't deserve it we never had sex but we did everything else so i he would like there he is the man the myth does not like hearing his mom the original host he would it sounds like a straight up baby crying and i was

so king i know but i didn't know that like i he was like i really want to do this and i was like i don't understand why you want to do that and i think that's another problem is like girls are taught like vaginas are gross oh my god yes and like you know going down on a girl is gross and i believed that and that's so pathetic and sad my vernacular has changed zero percent in four years i still say like what a king like am i am i choogy like am i like have i not evolved enough for the world no i well okay here's what i'm gonna say i think that every millennial has a little bit of choogy yeah in them i don't think that this is choogy i also think that um you've always had like a very elevated vernacular like when i'm hearing myself talk i'm like

i don't know i think i sound dumb that's crazy i remember listening to you talk and i was like i've made a mistake i'm like she's going to be the brains of the operation and i'm going to be we were gonna be like pinky in the brain no i think that you're so eloquent that's so kind of you and you've always been very eloquent thank you i feel like i say a lot of likes and ums yeah but that's like how people i mean i haven't noticed that you do that but that's also just how people talk and we always wanted this podcast to be like a conversation true so true it never like struck me as i still agree with what i said that like the the belief that vaginas are gross and i remember in another episode you said something you said that too

and when you said it i was like she's so fucking great damn i wish i fucking thought of that but i do still agree with that stigma of like oh vaginas are gross and that's why people are like i'm not gonna eat pussy yeah but grow up grow up and eat some puss shove your fucking face between some legs yeah don't be a fucking baby motorboat that pussy motorboat that pussy ho yeah he was like very persistent about it and then finally he was a little pushy fine he like wore me down he's like sure fine i guess you can go down on me and um mind you at that point i hadn't like ever even gone down on him i just like you touched touch touched his pp a little yeah over the undies denim i can't remember if i ever touched him like a bare handed

dry hump pregnancy um i remember like letting him go down on me and i was like it blew my fucking mind i was like oh my god this is like the best sensation and experience i've ever had and um it's true like i stand by that so ever like and then anytime we hooked up like if we started like fooling around i'd be like you know can i would i would like to reciprocate this because i'd like i loved him yeah i was in love with him i like i like he was doing this for me and like i wanted to like show him that's a quality that's equity that's i love my dumb it took a while i had to wear him down too he didn't want you going down on him no he was like i just i'm not ready for you to do that wow yeah and i'm like thinking about that now like that's

such a strange and abnormal experience for like a teenage girl to have yes um the tables were by then i could legally vote as an adult some things never change that was a beautiful like a full circle moment yeah we love we love that like nearing that just happened i'm thinking about me being like i'm so cringe and i'm saying the same fucking thing i am cringe but i am free don't kill the part of you that's cringy kill the part of you that cringes damn that's fucking based i think that was like aristotle absolutely socrates socrates nuts yeah so yeah and then we never had sex and then again after i graduated college we like went on a couple dates and like made out but we didn't like do

anything else and this sounds so bad but he was wearing like this dumb ass hat and i immediately lost attraction to him like one of those patty caps i was like so like i was like i'm not into this anymore that would probably turn me all the way off especially in my early 20s like shit like that would always turn me off about guys like really petty shit but to be fair it'd probably turned me off at 27 you know it's a sign of my my youth that i didn't make the connection of petty cabs and that it would be petty for that to turn me off that me today would have thrived so hard on that one the mental connection that connection i i'm gonna say i stand by that statement that those caps are done well and i'm realizing it now reflecting on it like

it wasn't just the hat it just gave him like he he's always been kind of a like m'lady kind of guy you know what i mean uh-huh so it just kind of emphasized like his inner neck beard yeah and and i do still think he's probably a nice guy but also like we don't know each other anymore it's been like 15 years you know let's assume he's not i don't know why i just decided in this moment i of like him he just he gives me the vibes that like he cheats on his girlfriends you know what i mean it it's always the dudes that should not have any of the audacity he he might as well have cheated on me back in the day i remember this specific boyfriend i remember we you know i was a thespian um why are you late girl um maybe yeah yeah maybe a little okay that's none of your

business that's none of that's none of my business like in zoolander you were bulimic you could read my um i haven't seen what i know i know i know i've only seen parts of it well anyways anyway uh we we went on this like uh annual thespian trip um as you do and i remember a girl who's like a couple years younger than us like sitting on his lap and had him like cornered and he was just sitting there and i remember like crying i i sat in a different row because i was like this bitch her name is erica fuck you erica erica new enemy of the pod ass bitch and you always were i bet you still are i've tried to find you online and i can't but i will find her and see what she's up to um didn't like you then probably wouldn't like you

now um once a bitch i also did not like her sister same situation two pick me ass sisters that feels like a parent's of parents fault probably um anyways fuck you erica's mom um i sat in a different row on the bus and i remember there was like a couple who was together like for most of high school sitting next to me and they were like you should break up with him that's really fucked up he shouldn't be like allowing this to happen and I remember thinking like they were right but I wasn't gonna do that damn that's like really deep profound shit for a high schooler to say yeah they were they were pretty wise all things considered but they were like and and then I remember afterwards a lot of my friends were like I'm gonna hold my

hold your hand when we say this liz like he is not cute enough to be treating you like this i mean it sounds like the fact that he had a cap like that yeah tells me exactly like i can i can picture exactly what he looks like because there was a specific type of dude in high school that just like and if you are a straight guy in theater in high school the straight straight men in theater are already insufferable you know what i mean and i had a lot of really that into high school you're putting a magnifying glass on it and and there aren't a lot of straight guys in theater who can also sing that's yes that's an attestation i wouldn't say he's like a strong vocalist but for a high school sure you know he got the job done he could he could carry a tune

um he would sing on that sing on that puss no but i was also gonna say um um oh i remember in high school i remember like he started a band and it was not good and i was like this is just a phase but it wasn't a phase and he's still in bands is this no shoes no oh you just don't know like multiple dudes unfortunately i did say a couple of musicians yeah i used to like find musicians on my space and then like become a creepy yeah that was that was my type i love that i love that somebody has to they loved it too yeah well

oh god if you're not an old ass man or a tiny child you can't be wearing that hat there's no excuse you look like a newsie so i'm amazed that there are people that actually think like i'm gonna put this on i'm gonna fucking kill it yeah i'm fucking slaying in this hat i mean i i do enjoy giving head because i like you know when you're in charge of like making someone feel good oh it's fucking hot kind of a power element yes it's like you feel good because i'm fucking making you feel good yes and then like you can you can kind of be in control of like how much they want it too so in that aspect like yeah i enjoy giving head but i would totally like i i if you don't go down on me like we're not going to hook up interesting wow every time like even just like

a random hookup it's like that's a good rule i haven't had very many of those or well i don't know now i'm better at like being like okay i can sense if this guy is not gonna go down on me but it is a vibe yeah you can feel it like this guy doesn't eat pussy so do you like not like going down on girls and then they're like well what yeah i do i'm good at it so i've been told i'm good at it okay prove it yeah i will be the judge of that i honestly i think i prefer to give head like i'm i'm realizing i know dude i know i know i've realized this like as i've gotten older and honestly i've been thinking a lot about it because it's like why like why don't i want to like because there's power in both of this giving head and receiving

head it's like you go down on me and make me feel good and also like i'm in control of like how you're feeling right now but like i think i have such a hard time with like the societal like societal second one they like smell bad you know there's like that whole like and sometimes i'm just like if i've had a long day i'm like really concerned about like what that experience is like washing your genitals is important and then i can't focus i can smell the day and like i've been trying so hard to just get over it because who the fuck cares like the amount of smelly balls i've smelled if i had a dollar for every sweaty ball i'd have a lot of dollars slapping in my face and they don't give a fuck they don't care so why should i care so i've been more i'm i mean

maybe i need to talk about that with my therapist but like i don't know there's something about like like we were saying the power of like i'm going to go down on you you're not going to be able to do anything about what i'm doing that's what we should have named the episode like if i use a little bit of teeth like you're gonna fuck your shit up you know what i mean what the fuck amelia i don't know there's something about it like if threatening genital side if somebody doesn't want to go down on me i just came up with that yeah so like i don't okay that's a good point that's a really good point it's just like if they're not even gonna make the effort yes then you're like what excuse me sir yeah this is this is foreplay like yes let's like we we both need

to make sure the other person is we really think we're making points yeah this is we've heard of it just like thrust for 30 seconds like you know anyway so i think i prefer i prefer to give i'm realizing this i'm a giver i'm a giver you still are a giver and that's just a new in the past like six months i've realized that about myself no you've always been very giving for me personally both orally and friendshiply high school boyfriend where like the two main ways that my first experience was like him going down on me and not having the expectation we get it oh i have to give him head i have to like because because you congratulations you had your pussy um but i think if we i haven't had that experience i would have never like

i don't think i would have um had such high standards or not my my standards were on the floor like during this recording i wouldn't have been considerate of like my own pleasure i was texting two of my like closest friends from college the other day we have this group text that we started when i was listening to the fairy smut books um but we started talking about one of my friends is getting married now and um some of the she's marrying another person from college and some of the guys that are going to be there i've hooked up with and we were talking about just our various college like hookups um and dating experiences and I was like thinking about I was telling them the bar was on the fucking floor because Mr. Liz made me realize

Mr. Liz made me realize how low my standards were yeah so I mean that's like a beautiful byproduct of like a healthy relationship it's I didn't I've talked about this on the podcast but like i when frank told me both of my middle names i was like oh my god like what you know my middle names he's like amelia we're like gonna have to expect more but it's like i've never mr liz is like that too he's like sometimes i'll tell him stories and it it's like i'm almost telling him like a war story he's like i don't know he's like none of my friends would ever do something like that so it's hard for me to fathom that people are like this yeah and it just it does add some color and some texture to like yeah what expectations should actually look like

absolutely yeah i know i feel you we're dating good guys and not nice guys you know how that's like a totally different we're dating like good guys and it's really crazy to look back on this and think that we were like fucking spitting we were like oh we know what the fuck we're doing yeah yeah i was still fucking my ex at this point secretly secretly in private and refused to talk about him until like episode like 30 but i mean how relatable is it though to secretly be fucking your ex you know yeah that's true we broke up my friends all hate him i'm gonna do this thing even though i know i shouldn't yeah and i'm not gonna tell them about it until it comes to a head yes and i remember when when you did finally like you were in crisis

and that's when you actually told me uh-huh oh god it was so fucking bad girl been there it was like right after we had like gotten an airbnb halfway between us and like had this like big emotional moment and then he just like dipped i was like i haven't told anyone that i'm going through this and now i'm going through this alone it was so i had really hit a moment well and then the plot twist was that he was cheating on someone with you yeah so i hate to see it i'm never gonna let that go you know what i love to see that i love to see him being a piece of shit because it just it feels reaffirming when you're like oh you haven't changed actually absolutely he didn't changed then he tried he put in a lot of work to convince you that he changed but i think he

showed you in that moment that he actually hadn't 100 yeah oh good lord we have a lot of episode ahead of us yeah we do let's keep going yes and um i think that's like one of the most important parts of like having like really great sex where like you trust each other and um you're like everything is very good like it's just great sex is just like speak of the devil mr liz just walked in and he shall appear because we're like taught like oh he's sweaty yes oh what is that like i don't know that has been the narrative from like as far back as i can remember in sex ed in school is like well like boys will be boys like you know like they always just think what they're doing they start thinking about sex from early on and like they're always thinking about

like you know like putting their dick in something and it's like it is weird how socialized that is yeah it really is literally jd vance like when i started having the feelings on a couch god i want someone to touch yes i was like what like that's not ever something you hear about i remember like the first time i watched porn and it was kind it was like one of those like accident type of situations like looking through hbo late at night and i was like like why did like why because you you're never i feel like little boys are always taught like when they see porn it's like that's just something that like little boy you know what i mean yeah there's yes there's a totally different narrative in and i'm not saying in like every like everybody's upbringing but like well

at least in my elementary school think about everything you're exposed to where it embraces and amplifies this narrative some of the sirens yeah boys see naked women and like want to touch their dick like yes whereas like we i i can't remember a single time that i was exposed to the idea of like women masturbating never like never yeah never thought of that at all didn't know anything about it honestly the first time i like actually figured out how to masturbate i was 17 oh this is what you got the hate email from that line probably why i was such a fucking bitch as a teenager i i stand by that too yeah i didn't know how to jerk off yeah yeah so of course the first time a boy touches me i'm like it blows my goddamn mind yeah yeah i didn't know how to

jerk my peanuts frustrated all the time because i didn't know how to masturbate and it wasn't even something i was aware of like the like the clit was just like a foreign idea to me i didn't know it was like this amazing jewel of the south that was the first time i had ever heard that phrase i thought it was so fucking funny now i'm like okay if you don't touch my clit i will fight you that's what christina aguilar was talking about genie in a bottle right you gotta rub me the right way i remember ever listening to any sort of conversation i remember in in elementary school during sex ed how old were you when you first had sex ed i was in fifth grade i was in fifth grade too but it was more of like it wasn't really about sex it was just like we

were all in the cafeteria it's wild to me they put boys and girls together for that they didn't do that for me oh oh i thought they did and they showed this video about what it was like to like wear a bra and get your period for the first time and no one had their period except for me and i didn't want anyone to know your period in fifth grade yeah we just revisited that i guess i was 12 so that's not really that well for some reason like well in elementary school you don't have sanitary like trash bins in the stalls that's so true so i just remember like have be like wearing a pad and like not knowing what the fuck to do because there wasn't anywhere i could throw it away like it it yeah it's a whole fucking thing you're wearing a giant pad it feels straight up

feels like a diaper a giant smelly pad yeah smells like old lady perfume it really does god that was so bad for you too scented pads and scented tampons insane that's insane tell me you've never been around a vagina without telling me seriously inventor of scented pads anyways i remember like having sex ed in fifth grade and i just had my head down were you like am i the only person yeah experiencing i knew one other girl had her period and everyone talked about it but she was like cool yeah everyone was like nikki's already had her period that's so funny to think about that that was like a like a rite of passage then because of course it was and i was like oh i don't want everyone to talk about me what is my period fifth graders just like wanted to talk

about when everybody was getting their period that's well and then and then they were like everyone's wearing like training bras and then like i don't know my mom wouldn't let me wear eyeshadow and i was just like let me wear this shitty blue eyeshadow mom let me have my period and wear blue well i was thinking like in in my fifth grade sex ed they separated the boys and the girls during the discussion and like i can yeah i'm not gonna like tell you know i don't know best but like as i got older i'm like how beneficial would that have been to hear that is because like oh yeah I feel like I could have learned so much it really does because like when just now when we were listening I thought that you were saying that your sex ed was all

like boys and girls together and I was like that's absurd but back then I thought boys and girls should be in the same room for sex ed I think now I understand why they weren't yeah I don't think they should be in the same room together but I think they should be learning about each other's anatomy absolutely yeah and like the consequences of yeah right yeah oh my god this is what they told me yeah but but even when i think about it now too like in like the the caring and keeping of you like that is very focused on i mean you're also a child so it's like obviously going to be cisgendered but in general i think there should be some inclusion of like and this is like a boy's body yeah and how thing like i don't know i it could

get a little dicey but in general just knowing what there is is helpful like it's weird that it was like a big secret totally yeah i used to think penises looked like snow like there were three balls like snowmen i wish they were like just a little stacked up that sounds i don't know it sounds so much more fun than how actual penises are that's in my head that's what they looked like when i was a kid liz forgot 2024 i do think that if they taught little boys about periods specifically it would be less of like a like what happens yeah yeah because i mean we if people are trying to insult tim walls for by calling him tampon tim because he signed a mandate that like required pads and tampons to be available in all bathrooms what's

the fucking issue with that and well for them to be try and make it an insult i don't think any like i have a hard time believing women were trying also leaning into that because i'm like if you've had a period you have definitely had an unplanned period you've had a surprise happen to you and like i just feel like anyone with a period has experienced not being prepared for it and that's the worst fucking feeling and when you're going through puberty your period is so unpredictable yeah so to to be able to have access to that without having to like ask or like find a quarter yeah because they had the machine and half of the time they don't even work there's nothing in that and um i remember like my mom well my parents were teachers so like my mom always had

pads and tampons um and she constantly had to give them to students and like if my mom wasn't like a teacher i wouldn't have teacher friends like their teacher friends that i could go to and be like do you have a pad yeah um luckily i like was usually prepared i kind of don't really remember having my period like i know i had it i don't i just don't remember the specifics besides like the traumatizing parts of like bleeding through your pants yep oh my god yeah i know like bleeding at the pool whatever happened to you it would like come down in like a stream because it would be like it would go with the water droplets i had a little bit of a situation where i had a pad when i went swimming oh no and i like it have you ever seen big mouth

yeah there's it's one of the seasons where like one of them one of the kids she's gotten her period she has her period at summer camp and she's a pad she hasn't used tampons yet doesn't know how to use them and um she has a pad in her swimsuit and then it like absorbs all the water the lake and then it starts to have a gravitational pull like oh my god that is how it feels well it's so it did escape my my swimsuit and then it's like floating and you're like what the fuck do i do who's this you're like trying to find a way to like make it sink to the bottom no i would just pretend it was someone else's i i don't remember what i ended up doing but oh my god yeah my pad escaped my swimsuit in the lake and um unclear what happened but i remember

seeing that big mouth scene and i was like the the exaggeration of this is so funny and relatable where you're like yep my giant pad is soaking up all the fucking lake water everyone is gonna see my big pad they really do make them fucking huge especially like a bedtime maxi pad uh-huh that thing's egregious totally oh yeah have you tried period underwear no i tried on a pair of period underwear and it feels like that yeah yes that sucks because like it's supposed to be a good alternative yeah i thought it was gonna be kind of like yeah well the way they like market it is like oh it's just like regular underwear with like fancy wicking or something but it's not like that it's it's a big fat pad in the underwear at least in the pair i tried on and i was like wow i hate

this um also did you know that uh period underwear can set off the tsa thing i saw i saw a tweet where this girl was like i was wearing period underwear underwear to set off the tsa detector and the tsa agent was like are you wearing period underwear and she's like bitch do you need to announce to everybody that i'm on my period and wearing period underwear that is the worst like of course so also like so pick me right to be like hey everyone yeah this girl's on her period right ew that is a very tsa behavior though i feel like they get drunk on power at a young age if i knew what they were being told and i still don't know but i'd assume it was something along the same lines of what we were being told which was just like basic biological stuff in which case

shouldn't we normalize that at a young age like i still know men that are in their 20s that don't want to hear when i'm on my period every everybody with a uterus yep everyone born with a vagina has a period yes that's not true but the intention was there i would have i like i don't know if i would have been receptive to it at age 11 um and i definitely wouldn't have been my my mom was like she tried so hard to have a conversation with me about sex take a shot every time we hit the table i was like just kidding so she like got me a bunch of books and she left them on my bed and she was like here read these and she i she knew i would read them yeah so i mean like i flipped through them and that's how i like got all my knowledge and it's

like how i gained all my knowledge as a teenager too like when i started experimenting with like sex and stuff like and birth control i did all my research on my own i wasn't like asking my mom so um but i do wish that there was something that had covered like yeah people are gonna pressure you into like doing sexual acts and if you don't want to you can say no yes like yeah no one teaches you you can say no no my hinge date last night about this of just like you're not like the who are you dating at that point i wish i had learned as a teenager was just like the epoxy guy guys are gonna start pressuring you to do stuff and if you don't want to that's perfectly acceptable and they're not allowed to make you feel bad about it

it's just like the guilt aspect was so shocking yes well i have a question do you ever feel still like you have to say yes even if you aren't feeling it i so i'll always if i'm not feeling it i will always say no good for you uh this is really interesting to listen back on because this was before i realized that an encounter that i had was assault yeah we talked about that um a few episodes later yeah i still in my head refer to it as gray area assault because that's what we decided to call it then yeah but i mean it is straight up assault yeah if you have to coerce someone into having sex with you yeah coercion is not uh consent no no i think that's what we said then too because that was that was a bar coercion is not consent it's true and it's

interesting like to hear me ask you that question because i think i was still kind of struggling with like processing it well yeah it feels even though it is straight up like coercion and it's not consent there's still that conflicting feeling of like okay i did agree to it and i participated but i wasn't enthusiastically consenting and i feel like if it's not enthusiastic consent then it's like not really consent yeah it's coercion yeah and the internal struggle comes from um like your own autonomy you're like i did i did agree to this i i feel like i'm having a hard time explaining what i mean it's because it's it's complicated you trust yourself yeah so then when you make this decision that goes against what your gut is saying

it can feel very confusing totally yeah it was like specifically i think like what i had in mind during that question too was the situation that I was in where it was like well I said yes so it's not his fault because I said yes you know which is like I think that we're socialized to think that yeah to be like well I did technically yeah like I said it was okay yeah but I didn't want or like it yeah and I did initially say no and my no wasn't respected yeah and and then there there's no excuse like in this guy's in this guy's head it doesn't matter what happened for him to be like no I'm gonna keep pushing yeah because the only thing that happened is I'm horny and I want what I want and I don't like the answer no right right um yeah

yeah and like in my head I was like well I am like I did go to his hotel room so like I did give him a signal that i wanted so then it was like i felt bad you know and so it's like i don't know listening back to this it's like yeah we all feel like we've a lot of us have had that experience of like i feel like i should have said no absolutely or like i wanted i did say no or i want to say no but i still did it anyway unfortunately that's a part of girlhood i think yeah is being in a situation where someone is continuing to pressure you and even in this first episode i'm talking about how my my high school boyfriend was pressuring me a lot to do to it doesn't matter if it was him wanting to perform sexual acts on me versus the other way around of him trying to

pressure me to perform sexual acts on him it's still pressure yeah to do something that i didn't feel ready to do yeah and even though i was seeing it in maybe a positive light at the time like reflecting on it now it should have been i'm thinking about one of our friends talking about her first boyfriend in college and neither of them knew what they were doing and she was like it was a lot of fun because we were figuring it out together yeah and it wasn't one person pressuring the other person right it was like well neither of us know what we're doing and that is fun totally it's fun to figure it out together and if you've ever been in that situation and i feel like any like kind of trusting relationship you you have to figure that

person out and what they like because that's just like the territory of a relationship everyone is different and that's like the exciting part yeah yeah totally no that you said that very well well said thanks the snaps uh i didn't feel very eloquent no that was very eloquent i didn't have the confidence that i had in 2020 well should we have had that confidence back in 2020 I feel like you have more confidence now oh 100 percent um and I also feel like you were right then and you're also right now thank you you're just always right yeah I want that in writing I think I'll write it down write it I'll tattoo it I was about to say I want it as a tramp stamp I was gonna say I'll get it as a tramp stamp matching tramp stamps I yeah and you know what

I I have no doubt that Frank would probably get it as a tramp stamp too yeah absolutely the three of us damn maybe we could get mr liz a little drunk i mean it wouldn't be his first tattoo that's true okay um all right we'll we'll do one more little section and then we can take a break and uh continue have a part two next week that's good and that's how it should be but but they still are able to make me feel bad like i still feel guilty of like of being like i was thinking more recently um within the last i'm talking way too much this episode i had like made out with this guy i was relieved though honestly he was 22 i was like oh my god i'm so fucking i know i had no idea i like made out with him at a bar and then

we like lived a block away from each other so we're like oh let's just like split an uber this guy was a horse girl oh no frank's a horse girl we stopped at his place and we're like but I love it about him and then um I it's like he was so aggressively making out with me and like his beard was rubbing it was like oh god the chafing yeah so I like I was like hold on I have to go to the bathroom I went to the bathroom and I was looking at myself in the mirror with this like bright red oh my god my face is like bright red and I like around my mouth just like from his beard i looked like a jam kid oh yeah that's such a relatable yeah you walk into the bathroom and your mouth is red i looked like yeah just like a kid that's always eating strawberries

yeah that's i mean i exclusively have dated dudes with beards i feel like i've like calloused over time like truly you have amazing exfoliation yeah you never get breakouts down there no i do you know maybe and that's why you know what mr liz has facial hair and that has not happened to me dating him interesting it's like your ph has balanced out well i also think maybe that guy was just very aggressively like yeah that could have been it too trying to eat my face yeah and yeah i think maybe not very good kissers if they have a beard or like a scruff it'll just kind of scratch you yeah i also don't really like me and frank don't like make out that's so true i feel like after a certain amount of time it's like yeah making out feels weird now yeah like why

what or why are our clothes still on you know it's like when we're making out there's like a goal in mind yeah and it's sex you know i mean i do have to say i do just like enjoy a casual little make out here and there sometimes you're like i just want to kiss i do love i mean i'll kiss all day i don't i just a little makeup it makes me feel young this is i'm about to expose myself i still don't know if i know how to make out because there's only one way to find out let's kiss right now 200 let's fucking go might as well make out it feels like i never know what to do with my tongue like there I it has never been a smooth experience for me and I'm like is it me it must be I'm the common denominator here where tongue like tongue wrestling is always tongue wrestling

it should not be wrestling first of all there I mean it always is for me I would get like makeout high like I'd just be so caught up in the makeout oh my god I love that part of me now though i'm like was i just drunk i was probably just drunk that was when i did a lot of my making out same i was the makeout bandit in high school though i i kissed too many people in high school i look i look back on it i don't know if that i feel like that's admirable first i mean i'm proud of myself i was proud of myself then this girl is such a slut she kisses everybody and it was truly it was everyone like i had no standards i was like whoever would like that's the horizontal with me i was like i'm gonna make out with this guy a lay down make out lay down make out and

then when i got to college i had a lay down make out with someone in the laundry room and i told him i was a virgin because i was at that point and it was the first time i had experienced like oh a lay down make out is like the prelude you think something more will happen yeah but i had never experienced that until then and then my now ex-boyfriend's best friend walked in on me and that guy in the laundry room now and that's the circle of life baby what's laundry room guy doing these days he's married oh he had we had a phone call did they meet in the laundry room also hopefully not because that's part of our lore dylan the the uh the dorm room laundry room yeah where people just forget their laundry and you have to move it but you walk by the vent

sometimes and it smells like laundry outside it's the best yes fucking best but this guy told me that um the reason he stopped talking to me was because um i don't know you just like kind of seem dumb is what he said to me on the phone when did he say this i don't care this was back freshman year i'm gonna fucking fight him and i told my ex i told my ex that he said that and i told him that i like yelled at him back and he like sided with the guy he was like why did you yell at him that's so mean i was like bitch he called me fucking stupid like anyway anyway we're getting way off track you know what i think i threatened a guy in this first episode reese yeah i did threaten reese enemy of the pod number one original enemy of the pod so it's gonna this this time around

episode 200 dylan i will fucking fight you it's on site i'm gonna fight you and i'm gonna fuck your wife yes and she means it she she's talking square up roll up i'll send you the address yeah come through i'll show you what he looks like now when we're done recording i hope dylan i hope you bald slowly and every day you wake up and you're like is my hairline receding and then you get more and more self-conscious about it and then one day your wife leaves you for someone with really great hair i know that is so extensive but i just really want it to hurt because how dare you call my girl dumb thank you i'm pretty sure he is slowly losing his hair i mean we all kind of are damn that's so relatable i started hers by the way have i told you that no yeah because like i was

like seeing my hair thinning at the top and i was like not today satan and so i started hers so much hair that it's just hard for me to believe thank you but i can't wait to hear more about it yeah this episode can't wait to hear more about it no it's not sponsored by hers um it could be though well that's a good uh like commercial for next week's episode like that we talk about our first enemy of the pod yeah we decided this is if if we tried to do this whole episode tonight knowing how gabby we are five hours yeah so we're gonna split it up yeah um tune in next week for the second half of recapping our very first episode i'm really excited to keep listening to yeah it is fun yeah it's fun it's fun to be in each other's presence and like yap about it yeah i was

gonna say like i'm yapping a lot in this episode i do talk so much it was like i said though like i needed you to because i was so fucking nervous episode two i talked a lot and it was that same day we did each have our independent breakdowns yeah yours was before it went live mine was after yes because i was like wow we're really like being very public about very like private things in our lives and now i just like couldn't give less of a fuck you are so in the public eye i'm just like what do you want to know half a mil half a mil followers baby i'm fucking plateaued baby i'm stuck here for life i don't think that's a plateau i think that's like a that's like a really good place to be it's very consistent thank you it's a lot and i'm proud of you thank you look at like

like i feel like that was always like this was always destined to happen and watching it happen in real time it's it's been so fucking cool thank you yeah and i feel like this is a great way to end our 200th episode is putting kind of a a bookmark here and really acknowledging how much growth and development you've had and like you've always had this is just who you are you've always been a ham since a kid yeah you'll be the you would be the first to say that and so would your parents yes i i've shared this meme with amelia before where it's like are you okay son and then it's like it's the the cartoon meme it's like the dad coming in and it's like are you okay son and then it's like no i must entertain the masses and it's a stick figure wearing a gesture mask

and i sent that to amelia and i was like this is you and that's just that is just like who you are to your core like i must entertain the masses when things aren't okay you need to entertain the masses yeah i mean yeah and things weren't okay and you fucking entertained masses it's it's really interesting to listen to this and like know you as well as i do now too because it's like you've i feel like we're just like doing like compliment ping pong now but like you've always been so like wise and that's why i wanted to do this with you i don't see myself that way you literally are though and like you're very you've always been very eloquent even though you don't think that you are and so it's like it's so interesting to listen back and be like fuck yeah

like this it has been such a consistent thing that you've like been the brains of the operation like from the jump i really do think that you you've been the brains and the comedic relief and i'm just here to like be like i don't feel like i think i feel like it's the opposite i feel like i feel like you're the brains you're the entertainer and then i'm like more of like the um like i'm the one who i was not good at editing but i like knew enough yeah so i was more of like the kind of planner and doer you know yeah but also at this point i was like i'm ready to get drunk and tell everybody my secrets yeah yeah and we had been stuck inside for three months at that point that's probably why i was like trying to have a hoe phase i i really was planning on having

a hoe phase when we started this but fucking mr three episodes in remember when you told me that you guys got a relationship i know it was unplanned dangling out here alone it was unplanned both of us are still surprised it's like damn i can't believe we're really fucking doing this four years later i know can you believe it yeah look at us go um all right i think this is a good place to uh yeah pause and we'll be back next week to uh do the rest yeah commentate on our yapping we're gonna yap on the yap i'm that sounds inappropriate but yapception yapception i think i'm gonna have to call this yapception part one i love that that feels right we should just rename the podcast that's a yapception yapception

i like it it's sounding better the more we say it well anyway i think i'll i'll use um our original ending unless you want to sing us out now no use our original ending that's cute why not okay for like old time's sake okay bye see you next week in the name of the father and the son and the holy spirit amen