The Hoely Hour - E36 D*ck Pic Art Critic

Episode Date: April 23, 2021

Fellas, is it gay to kiss a girl after she goes down on you? We have the perfect MLM opportunity for YOU! Get your heart broken and start living your best life, fueled by spite and therapy! The girls answer an important listener question: what's the difference between love-bombing and a honeymoon phase? And, Amelia shares steamy details of her first official sexting experience... eyebrows eyebrows Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Hey, it's Ryan Reynolds here for Mint Mobile. Now, I was looking for fun ways to tell you that Mint's offer of unlimited premium wireless for $15 a month is back. So I thought it would be fun if we made $15 bills. But it turns out that's very illegal. So there goes my big idea for the commercial. Give it a try at mintmobile.com slash switch.

Upfront payment of $45 for three months, $90 for six months, or $180 for a 12-month plan required. $15 per month equivalent. Taxes and fees extra. Initial plan term only greater than 50 gigabytes. May slow when network is busy. see terms can i do an art critic review of dick pics well that's what i was just about to say go ahead it's about the backlighting and like the glow of the of the dick but the shadows and the

highlights yeah yeah exactly throw that bitch in i want to analyze the composition does it meet the rule of thirds of like your dick in the middle but maybe your face is in the back upper third or maybe it's your face is in the the frontal top two thirds and then your dick is in the bottom it's kind of like a diagonal of a face abs dick welcome to the holy hour i'm amelia samson and i'm liz ball it took us so long to do that yeah i started to panic i always get sweaty yeah me too even though we've already been recording for a little while it is the easiest part of the podcast and always the hardest for us to do i don't know what that is it's because we're like we have to transition into talking

about things what's my name what do you think of guys who won't kiss you after you've gone down on them um that's a good question i've actually never run into that really yeah i'm trying to think if i have no no guys have kissed me after they've come in my mouth i'm already gonna tell my parents not to listen to this episode I've already decided but yeah then I'm like yeah sure but then I think about it and like I kiss them after they go down on me so oh yeah like fuck it let's fucking go I am annoyed by guys who are like oh you gotta like brush your teeth well you go wash your dick so I don't have to brush my teeth every time I blow you uh did you wash your dick it should be fine yeah right what's up with your dick that it's acceptable for it to be

in my mouth but not yours that's unfair this is part of your body inequality this is part of your body uh frankly i find this behavior homophobic fellas is it gay to suck your own dick oh my god wow I can't believe nobody's ever how often does that happen to you or did that happen to you it happened to me in college I guess that tracks and that's about it so um when I was recording by myself while you were out of town someone sent me a question that i saved for when we could record together and um it wasn't like really relevant to um like a specific topic like it wasn't a like part of the consent is my kink series or anything right um

because i felt like it would just be such a good question for you to answer because i felt like you would have a better answer than me oh god or we could have a better discourse about it okay what's the difference between getting over the honeymoon phase and love bombing oh and then additionally he also asked also tips for getting over someone who has love bombed you holy shit yeah so the difference between the honeymoon phase and love bombing those are both really good questions I think that love bombing is more intense like i think that because i'm watching the guy that we talked about on last week's episode or now two weeks ago on the second part of consent is my kink love bomb his new

girlfriend and she is very publicly showing how their love story is unfolding and it feels love on his end and not on hers i think a huge difference between the honeymoon phase and love bombing is like a honeymoon phase is very natural like you're not intentionally doing it you're not intentionally trying to get them to become obsessed with you and i i do think love bombing is less it's not very self-aware totally um but it does come from like a very narcissistic and manipulative place so the way love bombing works is they're going to like bombard you with all of this attention that um and like admiration and then they slowly take it away and they take it away more and more it's not like it just suddenly stops yeah it's like

they take it this is more likely in a relationship they'll slowly take it away more and more and then they'll give you a little bit back and then it just kind of keeps you strung along yeah like oh well they gave me a little bit back so I can I can get back all of the love that they gave me before and then you keep trying but um I think the difference between a honeymoon phase coming to an end is you're just entering the next phase of your relationship where everything's a little more stable and you feel more comfortable confronting each other about stuff yeah and maybe like after becoming more comfortable in a relationship with someone I think yeah no I completely I completely agree with you I think um I was coming at it from the the direction of like from the outside

recognizing the difference yeah from the inside I think it's like definitely very easy to point out the difference like the honeymoon phase is exciting and genuine and love bombing is very desperate it's like a desperate attempt to hook somebody in and not in like an insecure way like in a I'm going I'm going to keep this person cemented in place um in a manipulative sense like if if this question is coming from a place of concern of am i love bombing someone you'll know like you like if you're just excited about somebody that's the honeymoon phase yeah and a love bombing thing i would say it comes from more of a place of insecurity oh yeah and control just the need for control yeah yeah that's a good point yeah but then from the outside like how the

fuck are you supposed to really tell without knowing the person's character and i don't think that there really is a way and that's why narcissism is so scary because like you don't they're you don't know what someone's relationship is like right inside yeah and then like getting over being love bombed I time man like I my ex it was kind of a different story and I'm not still not 100% sure that I was being love bombed by him but but it I'm almost certain that I was and that was just a lot of time to get over it um time healed that this most recent situation like I said I'm so damaged I like didn't allow myself to get involved with this guy that we talked about on the second episode of consent is my kink also like you don't really have all your

eggs in that one basket you know you're not right you're not doing that you haven't been looking to do that no definitely not but it sucks because I could have I was going through the texts yesterday um to see what else I could air out um and because I'm still feeling messy I think if I was in a different headspace if I wasn't if I was looking for a relationship right now I would have so easily fallen into that trap um because he was so like he like sent me a voice note of him telling his mom that I'm his wife like saying my name he said my name to his mother yeah yeah what yeah and like stuff like that is so strange because I feel like he is enough of like a sociopath that he would hire someone to pretend to be his mom oh for sure for sure and like but he was doing shit like that

that's like that is so intense for somebody that you have never met and I think that that's what makes it clear that somebody's love bombing is when it's like disproportionate to the situation he was doing that's when it's very obvious it's to 15 now it's been up it was 11 when we recorded the episode it's 15 now 15 women oh man I know so anyway to get over somebody that's been love bombing you I think the only piece of advice outside of just time is recognizing that it has nothing to do with you like that pain that you're feeling of trying to get over somebody that love bombed you is so independent of who you are as a person and understanding that it's it's something about them that made them hurt you like that it's the only way to separate yourself from the

situation and allow yourself to heal from it without thinking that you were lesser than because they dipped like that love that you were getting from them probably feels a little invalid because of like it being a love bombing but it doesn't say anything about you it says everything about them yeah it says that they're a crazy person yeah this is gonna be very counterproductive for me to say but find some peace in your anger like when i know that this is what's easiest for me if i've been hurt um by someone it's easier to kind of make that person the villain and honestly sometimes they are the fucking villain yeah especially if it's a circumstance where they've love bombed you they were very reckless with your feelings and that sucks um so to continue to like think about

different things that they did that pisses you off and relish in living well and like you can like I've been thinking about this a lot lately how like I a lot of my like the things I feel happy and successful about started from a place of like doing it out of like in spite of like in spite of my old job in spite of my ex like yes in spite of people who don't like me because the best revenge is living well yeah it really is i dated a guy who would say that all the time he'd be like well the best revenge is living well is the last guy i dated who was so non-problematic but i was like holy fuck that's so true the best revenge is living well because And then it gets to a point where you've been working on yourself for so long

that that anger has dissipated. And you're no longer doing it out of spite. You're just doing it for yourself. And then suddenly you'll look around and be on a velvet green couch. Recording a podcast. Recording a podcast with someone who became your best friend. I love it. I don't know.

it's um yeah doing something out of spite can be like petty and fun and it's a good distraction but also like give yourself some space for your mental health yep like it wasn't all like easy breezy I'm gonna be mad and do all this stuff like Elle Woods in Legally Blonde like yeah I cried a lot I was sad a lot yeah and I had to work through a lot of feelings but like when you're not shying away from the hard work you let it fuel you 100% snaps I like I realized through my breakup that like what's so frustrating about sadness and being hurt is feeling like I'm not coming out on top which is a huge thing with like the best revenge is living well it's like when you can take your broken heart and turn it into art as everyone says like it makes it feel like it's not

for nothing i feel like i'm living well for the first time in a very long time like i feel like i'm not alive i'm living which again i'm just like throwing a bunch of like fucking cliches into this brand but it's true like i i don't i think that those kinds of cliches don't click until they actually finally click in your head yeah right and it's repetition you have to train your brain to think differently yes so if it if that means starting with something petty and it's also part of it is also sitting in the bad feelings so when you are angry and you're alone just sitting there and being like okay well what's underneath this anger and then you continue to peel things back yeah all the way to your childhood all the way to their childhood yeah

it helps you find empathy it really does even if they don't deserve it a lot of the things that i'm grateful for and proud of with myself like my empathy like the podcast like everything that i'm doing right now that I'm proud of is the result of something fucking sucking like it's so true and that's a really cool thing and I said this on Twitter not just a few days ago like I am almost like excited now when painful things happen like whenever a door closes for me I said this on a past episode too whenever a door closes for me I'm like all right fuck yeah because I know that it's I'm about to do something cool with that and that was like a habit that I had to form like when when bad things happen now I feel almost kind of like I feel like kind of like a like a

Jack Nicholson crazy character I'm like oh great like I love pain because I do like I I've found a way to turn it into something good and and I feel like nothing can touch me in that sense I'm sure I'm going to be hurt a lot in the future but knowing that I don't have to be afraid of bad thing's happening now is very freeing and it definitely comes from practicing yes oh my god 2020 outside of like the very obvious worldwide issues was the most painful life I could have lived period personally for way too long and so much beautiful shit came out of it and I am very grateful for that I wouldn't change anything that happened in 2020 I feel like I'm like this like an MLM right now I'm like listen to me go get your heart broken and then invite three friends

sign up you get 10% off hashtag girl bosses you want to work from wi-fi no but really like I just anytime anyone gets MLM for heartbreak that's gonna be the title this episode for heartbreak we might be on to something here honestly heartbreak multi-level marketing hashtag girl boss hashtag work from wi-fi hashtag boy mom oh my god yes technically I am a boy mom that's true you are look you were already on the way anyway don't be afraid to hurt because it's gonna lead to some cool shit for you that's my bottom line oh I do have a question for you oh I probably should have prepped you before so you can also cut this out we can talk about next week because it's like a thinker i did a tiktok um stitch thing for this um

what do you think is the cringiest thing that somebody said to you in bed the cringiest thing someone said to me in bed i can't think of any words as much as just like there's yeah oh god like the action like you know how many many episodes ago back in our youth when we called it a focus face like when their focus face just makes you like drier than the sahara oh my god the slack and that god i know that sounds like so rude but when they have like their tongue sticking out oh no oh no i've seen that a few times i've seen that a couple times lord help us all i've never had anyone stick their tongue out no lord almighty the focus face that I get a lot is oh my god slack jaw I have seen that too why what is that like why

what it doesn't you have to work hard yeah I'm sure my face looks stupid too but probably not like I think like or I think like when I think of the cringiest thing I think of shoe man just being like painfully like into it when I was clearly not uh-huh and then you're just like kind of embarrassed like yeah and their face looks stupid they're like they look like a baby trying to like eat a cheerio oh my god you know what i'm talking about just like a baby being spoon fed with like their tongue out and they're like oh it's so awful it's been so long since let's call it the gerber phase the gerber you're so right oh my god yeah i hate it also just like anything and then you close your eyes

and you're just like can i use my vibrator now yeah god i'm just imagining being like i'm going to pretend my future husband's fucking me oh my god wow what a thought to have when you're with your boyfriend no it was more just like replaying pornos I've liked I have done that as well my eyes closed that's a really shitty feeling to be like all right what is going to get me off right now because it's not this thinking about an orgy where you're not there just putting yourself in an out-of-body experience wow what a sad tale having public sex with anyone else yeah well fuck i mean he was not you know i mean you know how i feel about him we don't need to recount do you like movies of course you do do you love movies well so do we how's it i'm alex

mccauley host of excuse the intermission a discussion show surrounding movies join me and my co-host max fosberg and grant columbini each week as we conversate about films from the past the present, and the future through fun and engaging podcast formats like movie drafts, Hall of Fame lists, tournament brackets, and film reviews. So whether it's the newest blockbuster or a resurgent black and white cult favorite,

you can count on us to keep you in the know on all things movie related. Excuse the Intermission is a part of the Chatter Network. Oh, this might be a good transition. I have a new bae. um okay I've been waiting guys I've been waiting to hear about this for so I keep texting Liz like I have so much to tell you but I have to wait until we're recording yeah um I don't even know how to begin with this it's not really a long story there's not a lot but it's like a lot you

know what I mean so I'll just dive in um it's not a lot in in quantity a lot in quality one of my videos got served on his for you page and he commented on it and we had like a little interaction in the comments and um it led to him following me and I slid into his dms and there was something about this man that turned me all the way on like I don't know what it is he's he's a track he's a good-looking chap but like just talking to him I was like sliding off my young fellow good-looking yeah quite a fox old sport the spirit of gatsby um but yeah i was just like i texted liz and i was like girl i sent well i sent you the voice note about it because like freaking out i was so flustered there's something so hot about him and he's so i have my reservations i know

she does she has good reason to i don't trust uh these online boys i know and i typically don't either and even with the guy that we talked about on consent is my kink like I was apprehensive just for what I'm looking back on now is probably my gut telling me that something was wrong I think like I'm apprehensive about this kid because I have no reason to believe that I won't get hurt just you know based on history so I'm feeling very protected but he is so good at reading people like he knows what I'm thinking or what I'm feeling at any given time it's bizarre like we've been FaceTime I'm getting ahead of myself so I was gonna ask if you guys have like FaceTime we FaceTime like every night yeah really uh-huh and it's always like three hours fly by

and we're both like oh fuck like he's I don't know Liz I'm like I'm like a smitten kitten and it sucks i think amelia needs to be with like a quiet little librarian man really yeah you need to be with like someone who's not doing the same thing as you so we actually talked about that because he was saying that he never ever talks to other creators he's like it's just i don't trust him i know you're listening i don't trust you you need to send me a resume or something yeah you gotta get through Liz she's my she's the bodyguard to this club she's the bouncer um but he is so he's just so sweet like I don't know I don't know there's he just does like little cute shit that I like like he streams and um he sent me a screenshot today he texted me while he

was streaming and he was like um I always check to see if you're there and like he sent me a screenshot of my name I was like oh my god I'm here hi he's just like it's cute little stuff like that he'll just facetime me like in the middle of the work day and I'll be on a call and I'll text him I'm like are you okay he's like yeah I just wanted I just wanted your attention and like it's just like stuff that I do you know but I'm apprehensive I'm I mean I'm always apprehensive and that's the thing is like is this my gut or is it just past experience and I don't know yet so I'm not getting too ahead of myself but anyway so this is the juicy stuff as our psychiatrist would say your gut instinct is calm so was it like alarm bells when the last guy

when mr crazy pants uh that's a good name for him that's what his name is now monster crazy pants uh when mr crazy pants like when you had a gut instinct was it pretty chill were you like something in me is telling me that this isn't gonna go anywhere i feel like yes like when he was like i'm gonna fly you out to come see me my was your gut like that's not happening yeah my gut was like i'm going to get moited but like that's also my anxiety but then i look back on it and i was like i think that i knew that it was never going to come to fruition like i just knew um and i was right but this feels almost different and like i feel like when i speak this shit into existence is like when i really start to get like crazy about it like

obsessive about it so I'm like trying to not get ahead of myself but he has unlocked this like sexual side of me that's so fun it's so fun like so I'm like I'm a little nervous about like talking like giving too much identifying information away just for his privacy but he streams every day and I was in one of the streams and he texted me something dirty during the stream you know this much and we just sexted while he was like live streaming and I was telling him how hot it was to me that he was like texting me while everyone was watching it is really hot it's so hot and he was like i was about to get offline a half hour ago but i knew that you were into this so i'm i'm online to keep you here that's so fun and then i was like you know it'd be hot for me as if you

went and took care of that too and knowing that i was responsible for it and he signed right off and um i sent like some of my first like racy pictures to a man it was very liberating the pictures that I took yeah give us some details yeah if you're willing I am I am are they like full nude no I still have never sent a full nude I don't know if I'm ever going to um which is pretty fun I know I actually now that I've sent this like almost nude I'm feeling like I could do it but it was um I took some thirst traps in like a lacy white thing like months ago but I like x'd the nips and I sent him like no x's on the nips and it was just like hashtag free the nipple free the nipple I sent him a bunch of those and then I posted some thirst traps a couple of days later

and he was like I want some just for me so I took some like thirst traps just for him which was fun and it's fun and then so um I like that when they're like do you have more yeah I know and then they're not even like I like when they're like I want pictures that no one else has seen but they don't have to be nudes they can just be like cute flirty pictures uh-huh exactly like i said like oh i just took some thirst traps for you it's like a thirst trap could just be your face honestly i was like oh and then they send you a little drool emoji yes and then they're like fuck you're so hot and you're like i know thanks for also knowing um so today this brings us to today um he he's very um a lot of his brand is educating other men on consent so he's really

really careful of how he talks to me like whenever he asks me for anything he's like if it's okay with you or like i'm gonna think about you when i jack off like if that's okay i'm like i love that shit i'm like do whatever the fuck you want in your brain i love when it's like sexy and also like asking for consent yes yeah it's god it's consents my cake it's it's poetic yeah it's so beautiful when they are like saying something like hot and like asking for your permission yep yeah and when and that I also think that that is easier for the receiver to decide where they're at on like the scale of like emotional safety yes if that makes sense yeah absolutely yeah because that's where you get the opportunity for enthusiastic consent and that's what everyone

wants there's a huge difference between consent and enthusiastic consent absolutely because like consent can be like yeah i'm consenting to this because you have not stopped like bombarding me and i then i can't figure out how to get out of this situation so i'm just gonna quietly give you what you want until i can safely get away yes yeah that that is very different than being like fuck yeah yes yeah absolutely and that's the perfect segue to today because he asked for something from me and like was like if you ever feel comfortable doing that and then just left it at that he wasn't like I'm just gonna like bring this up you know what I mean like he wasn't like kind of like pushing at me to do it and it made me want to do it I was like fuck yeah this is my

fucking choice so like feeling itchy talking about this but I'm actually pretty excited about it so your cheeks are getting a little flush are they so cute I like this guy I don't know what it is about him I don't know we'll see if I ever meet him um but he asked me so we were facetiming last night and he was just like being sexy and I he asked me if I can just go to sleep horny or if I have to like masturbate before going to bed and I said I can't go to sleep horny and he was like I really want to hear it sometime no pressure yeah and I was like interesting proposition and I thought about it for like a half hour and then I was like you know I'm gonna just like masturbate and record myself like just on audio and he said to me he's like I don't need I don't

need video he's like I just want to hear it and so I did and I was like I have a visual of like if you had a tiny mic holding it up god damn it you're vibrating oh yeah you put the mic down by the vibrator should have got a tiny mic god damn it for the future i'll have to remember that that's so fucking funny no but i i recorded it and i said his name which he really loved hell yeah and then i waited i'm having flashbacks to my sexting days it's she was so young that was like a year ago i was jealous of you when you were doing that because I'd never I'd never sexed oh my god it's so it like it is so hot when they say your name it is that is such a good move oh my god did he

return uh the favor okay so no so listen to this so I I waited I held on to it all day until he was about to stream and then I waited because he waits a few minutes after he goes live for people to join and he's like muted and there's music playing and there's a countdown so when there's five minutes left i sent it to him and i watched him listen to it on stream and his face was like eyebrows were raised and he was like holy shit and then he ducked out of frame for a sec and then ducked back up and then i had a voice note from him i know but it was just like it felt so I feel like what I struggle with with this kind of shit is feeling like if they leave that I've like given them this thing and like they leave with it and this feels different if

he were to stop telling me tomorrow it would suck it would hurt but like I wouldn't be like but I gave you this like you know because that was my choice it was my decision to send it and it felt so liberating doing that same with like the specific thirst traps I'm like fuck yeah like this is my this exists now in the world and i don't give a fuck and like i love that and i think a lot of this has to do with the podcast that's also such a good point too though like thinking about when you get to a point where you are enthusiastically consenting to like have this kind of like sexual dynamic online yeah it is very hot it's so hot because you can't actually have sex with them yeah yeah so that's a lot of fun and also um like knowing that you trust them

enough to not violate that yeah and um when they are also asking for if it's okay i don't know it's just such a hot combination it really is and he's adult it shows like he's very he's mature yeah and he's been through it mature mature you had a sexy experience that we haven't talked about in a long time are you comfortable talking about it yeah yeah okay a year ago so I wanted to ask because we were talking about how it feels more powerful to know that it was your choice but I also know that you left that feeling kind of um what's the word I'm looking for like betrayed because he kind of like dipped kind of quick out of nowhere did you feel like a part of that pain was because you had like these intimate experiences with him um I think there were

there's a combination of things because as we all know I moved on pretty quickly yeah you did you were fine you came out fine but it hurt in the moment yeah I was definitely bummed I was bummed with how he handled it yes because like there was always something in my mind that was like and also when I think about it like he did give me a lot of attention and I wasn't interpreting it as that much because I didn't know him in real life I knew him online right which is fucking weird but that's it's the future it really is and that was at the beginning of the pandemic too so like options had never been slimmer and also I think it a big part of it just had to do with um like being very like in a lonely and vulnerable place because of the

pandemic like when I think about how crazy I was too I'm saying I was crazy and I'm sure and that is in comparison to how like I feel now in my relationship which is pretty confident and laid back but I would like go to his twitter account if he hadn't texted me or messaged me I would go to his twitter account to see if he had liked tweets fuck I do that shit not anymore but like I've done that shit in so many instances and then now I'm like chaotic feeling now if my boyfriend doesn't text me for like 8 to 12 hours I'm like well it's a pretty busy day and we're both tired and like yeah i'm gonna play video games later so that is such a reflection of your inner peace uh-huh when you just like god well it took me a long time to get here even now like

just saying like how i feel about something makes me anxious but you're getting there that's like huge growth there's my therapist told me i've made a lot of um strides so oh my god that's like an elite compliment from a therapist it's so true holy fuck she's like you're doing really good work and i'm like you mean it thank you finally but um i mean i think that it it hurt because i hadn't been excited about someone in a long time yeah and i like i do think that he is like a very cool person i think he um might i i also got to make him what i want him wanted him to be a little bit in my head yeah um I think if we met in real life we probably wouldn't get along I think so too I agree with that I think I just also think I'm like older than him and

it wouldn't have worked because he seems chaotic but yeah I think he would have gotten all the way on your nerves yeah I would like see some of the stuff that he would say publicly and I'd be like that was a bold move you're above this but um I think yeah I think part of it hurt because like he just wasn't up front with me that he was starting to date someone and that like I partially anticipated that I was like yeah I'm hooking up with other people here yeah he just got shady about it yeah it's like oh just you know tell me that's not too much to ask it's really not but I would say for his age and who he is in general he did pretty well he did a lot better than most guys handle things and when I went to him and told him that he hurt my feelings

by how he handled it he even handled that pretty well yeah he took responsibility for it I was impressed he was like totally yeah I see what you're saying I also could foresee if he listened to the podcast and he was like oh I don't really like that you talked about me yeah and then like not really want to talk to me even as friends after that but even before you guys stopped because you really didn't dive into it until he stopped talking to you you like mentioned him briefly but like true you know he could have just said that if that was an issue but I don't think it was I mean he like loves attention too you can tell um but anyway that's the last petty thing I mean now he like he has a girlfriend and they've been together for a while now and like

if I were in her position and my boyfriend was talking to a girl he used to like sext and send nudes too just as friends I would be like this is uncomfortable for me and I don't like it uh so I could totally see why he's like yeah I don't really want to like be your friend right I could totally get that because he has a girlfriend that he's very in love with yep and that's very responsible of him yeah it's respectful and I respect that yeah so we got a letter from a listener we just got a letter i wonder who it's from um but she said uh she listened to our body hair episode okay but she said body hair positivity for the win but if you like to shave as a personal preference try dollar shave club hashtag not sponsored over here um but

uh gender neutral high quality razors via monthly subscription amazing um this listener has been using them for years and try trimmers for your pubes that's actually what i've been doing lately i put a little like like a trimmer like head thing on my um epilator and i just buzzed through it so it's not all the way gone so it won't be super painful when i use my epilator again but it makes a really that's amazing um dollar shade club and then she also said a very nice thing um p.s love your podcast i've used each episode to prompt a different conversation about sex body positivity with my boyfriend and he's already very open so it's assisted in even more in-depth conversations which has been great specifically sex as a goal-oriented task as

he has feelings of inadequacy when i'm not able to come um we've been working on it but this podcast really helped shut up i we love hearing stuff like that like best i mean the point of this is to like include everyone in conversations and like inspire like feeling comfortable having these conversations with other people in your lives i'm feeling emotional about that i feel like crying that's so that's thank you for sharing that yeah thank you so much for sharing your thoughts with us and then uh uh she also said thank you both for opening up a forum for this kind of conversation you all sound like my best friend and and i when we talk about these things you're creating a really healthy space badass as hell oh oh why am i my heart wait

seriously my soul i'm like actually tearing up i fucking mean so much it really does we put so much of our heart into this and like we it means so much to us so for us to know that it means so much to other people like that goes such a long way because because it is really like weird yeah to be so open about our sex lives yeah but the importance of like helping other people feel more comfortable to talk about these kinds of things so they can have better relationships and like more intimate even or even just like funny conversations about sex like like dating and sex is hilarious yes it's objectively funny and weird and we all have some fucking weird experience and being open about it is like it just feels so good to be honest it really does

I do want to read a message that we got a few days ago in regards to our Consent Is My Kink series. I really liked what this guy had to say. It was very interesting. But he said, new fan of the podcast and the last two have left me somewhat angry and frightened. And this is before we released our episode with our friend Madison. So this is specifically about Consent Is My Kink. I used to be very into the clubbing and bar scenes. and I was the guy that protected women, both friends and strangers alike.

I had a list of taxi drivers I trusted and assisted in getting drunk girls home safe, even to the point I was once attacked by a group of men who got upset with me for putting one woman into a taxi instead of letting her go home with them. Wow. Big respect. Yeah. Prior to that, my best friend and I used to teach self-defense to women who had been in a domestic violent relationship.

Wow. um i'm angry that some men are still raised in environments where they are taught and encouraged to disrespect and objectify women i'm now frightened because i know um i now have two daughters of my own and fear for their future safety i can teach them to be safe and how to protect themselves each each other and others but i shouldn't need to please keep up the good work with the podcast wow wow so that's the kind of stuff that it's like it keeps it keeps our spirits alive that there are men out there that gain nothing from helping their female friends out and still put themselves into positions to be attacked by other men because that's that's an

argument that i hear a lot like well we don't want to get attacked it's like okay um my art he's like kind of a childhood friend he's like a i grew up in the same neighborhood as him and he's a few years younger than me um but he's an emt now and homie has gains he's he is um a short king and very muscular hell yeah um but he uh was at a bar in las vegas and it's called parkway tavern i'm sure you vegas listeners have heard of it and are cringing oh no um but it's called parkway tavern and he was out with some friends and a girl there was just like incoherent and very drunk and this group of guys were trying to like take her with them to like take her home and he was like uh do you know this girl because I think he knew her from like high school or something he's

like they were like do you know this girl and um this group of guys was like hey fuck off mind your own business and he was like okay what's her name and then they didn't know her name and he was like she's not going home with you and he him and his friends fought these fucking guys and got this girl home like fuck got her yes and um i also recently saw a tweet where um someone was at a club and or maybe a bar whatever they're the same thing at someplace a club in a bar and um a woman told the bartender i saw that guy put something in that girl's drink and uh the bartender told someone at the club and then they turned on all the lights turned off the music and said someone in this club has been their drink has been uh something was put in it so all of the

ladies can return their drinks and get a new one for free and the music stayed off and the light stayed on and everyone continued to have a good time because like no one was mad that they were taking care of each other like and that i just got chills all over my body that should just be the expectation it should it should that is um i want to know what that bar is and i want to go and i want to blow all my money at that bar yeah that's amazing you don't need to sponsor us we will sponsor yeah fuck yeah we're renaming this podcast after your bar no more the holy hour it's now fucking but uh jerry's i don't know like this is the reason that we like you know had this two part series because we want to continue these conversations and also shine a light on like

positive things that people are doing to one continue the conversation and two like you know at least help us chip away at this big looming problem yes absolutely um should we find a sex fact oh yeah i forgot we do that we haven't done a regular episode in it's too long very long time um sex fact of the week that was beautiful that felt that felt like more like sensual yeah it was a little sensual okay health.com i feel like we've used this before the average sex session goes for 100 to 500 thrusts interesting ever been in the middle of a booty session and thought hmm i wonder how many thrusts that was yeah neither have we but apparently someone has because researchers took the time to calculate that intercourse typically lasts 100 to 500 thrusts

according to a report in the journal royal society open science so if that's how long sex lasts in thrusts how long does it go for in minutes a 2017 survey i think we've covered minutes before we have but it's different it's a different number oh okay a 2017 survey of 3 836 people conducted by uk-based dating site saucydates.com we're gonna have to check that out found that couples in the united states stay in the game for about 17 minutes and five seconds 17 0 5 beautiful wow we're just this is becoming a musical podcast um and that's just intercourse not foreplay we heard seven minutes the last source was seven minutes yeah wow and and that was just penetrative sex yeah not foreplay yeah so 17 minutes penetrative yeah that feels like well

staring in his face like huh do i have sex it depends on what i'm doing i've been wearing my apple watch during sex so i get the points that's so smart we get to sing to you this week it's been a long time we love nope nope nope we love you children wow i don't know what we're doing this is evolved yeah um email us for the best holy hour podcast at gmail.com at us at the holy hour twitter instagram everything hit hit us up whenever you whenever you feel like it while We're out of practice with these outros. We're rusty. Stop wasting your nights on a mattress that doesn't get you.

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