The Hoely Hour - E58 A Mukbang Blackout

Episode Date: October 15, 2021

We got through all of 2020 without having to record remotely, but our time has come. Join your (clearly) geriatric hosts on a voyage through technology woes and tales of hoes. Amelia and Liz discuss weaponized incompetence, whether cum-rag etiquette determines if someone is worthy of keeping around, and which states are the kinkiest in all the land. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

okay ready all right yep one two three all right i feel like you clapped after me what'd you say i think you clapped after i did oh fuck well let's do it one more time okay i'm gonna clap a little bit before you because that'll be the same time as you okay one okay this is a fucking mess oh one oh no okay one two three that was good that was like right at the same time all right amazing remarkable welcome to the holy hour i'm amelia sanson and i'm liz ball and we're recording remotely today so we're not in the same room i had a covid scare i was just afraid i had covid because i woke up with a little bit of a cold yesterday and amelia had some secondhand exposure to someone

with covid so we're we're we're bumbling around like a bunch of middle-aged moms trying to figure out technology right now that i really hope that we got like a good chunk of us trying to set this up in the beginning because it is hilarious and also so frustrating but we're here we're doing it i'm happy that we don't have to do another solo so liz i missed you so much recording last week you're gonna i got some nice messages so thank you to everyone who messaged me and sent me some nice thoughts but oh good i missed it too it felt weird i was like yeah it felt so strange for me too you you've been so busy but when you listen to it you'll hear like there are so many instances where i was like i wish liz was here so i could ask liz about it it's so it's so weird trying to

like do banter by yourself you're like and then you feel like kind of an asshole because you're like I'm just entertaining myself right now uh-huh yep yep exactly it was like 27 minutes and I really tried to stretch it for longer I'm like how the fuck does Liz do this but we got through it and now we're facing another obstacle doing this remote um so what we're doing is uh we are we have facetimed each other on our phones and then we're each recording individually in our own garage band app grandpa's on my lap like getting overstimulated and trying to bite me right now it's chaos this is just like ultimate mercury retrograde i can't wait for it to be over oh my god you're so right that's exactly what this is like everything that could have gone wrong during

setup did go wrong my computer is currently balancing on the headphone jack so that i can look at liz the right orientation it's a fucking mess over here but we're lucky we can do this this is where you know we're getting through it we're like savvy enough that we have figured something out yeah we figured out a workaround that's true it would have been easy for us to just give up but that's not in our blood so amen no it is not in our blood that's what's that sean mendez song it isn't in my blood that's gonna be the is that sean mendez yeah oh my god hell yeah i have been thinking recently a lot about how many celebrities and athletes are younger than me and it makes me feel very very old like basically everybody in the nba save like lebron james

is younger than me they're so young they're so fucking young they're all like 21 I'm like oh my god I just feel ancient I but I also think that's such a rare case where that's like the peak of your career you know that's true like sports you have to be like a young sprightly thing to make it yeah and then you're like retired by 30 exactly I turn 30 at next week i would like to retire is that next week uh-huh liz right oh my god your face right now so funny where you're like i didn't realize how late in the month it was already it's flying by what the hell happened oh my god we're gonna have so much fun your birthday weekend i am so fucking excited i've spent so much time stressing over okay so this this uh opens a whole can of worms that i

wanted to talk about with you anyways okay so my birthday I'm sure people are sick of me talking about my birthday because I've been talking about it for six fucking months I don't give a fuck we're still gonna talk about it for some context like two years ago when I could actually have a birthday um like a birthday party I had I got a party bus and we all dressed up in like um early 2000s like the themed outfits like costumes and it was so much fun and it was just fun to have like all of our friends in one spot I feel like maybe I don't really think anyone doubted me but I think people were like party bus haven't been on that since high school so um it I think everyone just had more fun than they were expecting not that anyone was expecting to have like a bad time

I think it was just like more exciting than they thought it was gonna be which is like the best feeling like totally I had a lot of fun planning it and I just like knew it was gonna be a good time because I just like wanted to do something fun with all my friends and um then people were talking about it for months so then there's like this pressure of like having another like fucking awesome birthday and it's my 30th birthday which is like a number that people care about because it's like a decade number you know yeah like no one cares when you're 20 but they're stoked when you're 21 no one cares like about any of the in-between ages nobody likes you when you're 23 yeah it's it's true you don't even like yourself when you're 23 so then I've been planning this

birthday party for like the last year at least I'm like okay what theme do I want it to be because it has to be a theme and I wanted it to be like sleepover so you could wear anything from lingerie to like footie pajamas so fun there's just like such a wide range and then I was like okay obviously I have to be wearing something kind of like crazy and slutty and awesome so yeah I was planning basically you guys like a dominatrix outfit like I bought a vinyl bra and it's like dark green because I that's my favorite color and then I bought these little shorts from uh Savage Fenty and it's it's all way too small it's I put the shorts on and Mr. Liz was like you look really hot and I was like I cannot wear this in a public place like was it just too small

like too revealing um the shorts were too revealing like you could see my entire vagina and then the bra was too small like it was too low like my nipple was about to poke out and then I was like I just wouldn't feel comfortable wearing this so and I I would just rather like wear something I'm comfortable in than like wear something that I look hot in and insecure in so yeah it just and like I I don't want to have to have a nip slip that was too much I don't want to deal with that and then I've been stressing about like where to actually have it because like everywhere is like you have to reserve this and then there's like a bar tab minimum that is very high so and then Mr. Liz was like it's okay we're gonna find a new outfit for you

because I was clearly like stressed when I tried it on and I was like I'm not wearing this and um he was like why is this like so important to you and I was like what do you mean like it's my fucking birthday yeah and like your 30th at that yeah exactly and he was like well like you're putting a lot of importance into this like outfit and I was like I just want to be the hottest one at my birthday and he was like but why and I was like because it's my birthday like everyone wants to be the star of their own birthday I don't think that's unreasonable but he was like I it just seems like you want this outfit to make you feel a certain way and an outfit's not gonna do that for you Liz like you and that and then I was like no no I already feel a certain way but I want the

outfit to match how I feel and he's like yeah okay and he kind of dropped it but he I think he was just like like you are hot and and fun you don't need to like have this like perfect like bombshell outfit and like I I did feel like leading up to it like ordering all this shit and like stressing about it was I was putting a lot of pressure on myself and it sounds like so corny but I was just like trying to like have this big like butterfly moment but in real life we don't have that you know like your butterfly moment is slow like it's a slow build-up so I'm like this isn't like gonna be some like emerging from the cocoon situation and that's what I was wanting it to be and then I was like stressing out about it to my therapist and she was like I was like well I just want this

place like wherever we go I want everyone to have a good time and that this is the only time I could get at this one place and she was like but what do you want you keep saying like what you think everyone else will want but what do you want and I was like oh fuck you're right I don't want to wear this like dominatrix outfit like I just assume that's what everyone would like want me to wear and like I'd like sure I did want to wear it but it's just now that I've like hyped it up I'm like well now I have to I don't know I understand that it was very I totally get that way like anytime there's like during prom I would get like that I'd be like now my hair has to be perfect I'm like freak out over just like these small things and I feel like setting expectations

really high is an easy way to be like super disappointed and find something wrong you know yeah no I feel that and like I think that being able to reframe it is good but I also think like it's not unreasonable either to just like want to feel like you look good you know what I mean and like feel good in what you're wearing because really like it in the most like the simplest of terms like that's really the goal is just to like feel good in what you're wearing exactly and like I think regardless of if you tried this outfit on and then realized like oh am I doing this because I think that that's what people want me to look like if you felt good wearing it you would still wear it that's so true that's so true so I don't really think like you're putting unrealistic

pressure on it I think you want to feel hot on your 30th birthday and like maybe it's not like a cocoon moment but like at the same time like it's your 30th so you want to feel like a butterfly regardless exactly I'm sure there's also a happy medium too I think so too yeah I think so too and like we I know I said this to you on text when we were first talking about this but like expecting an outfit to make you feel a certain way it's not even that it's like you it's like a wedding dress it's like you when you try it on you know that that's like the thing that you want to wear like you just know you you described it so well it is like not to say that this is like the equivalent of a wedding right but in some ways I did text you I was like it's like my wedding to

myself yeah I've done so much work over the last decade and I want to celebrate it and part of that involves looking hot yeah and like going back to your metaphor like your butterfly metaphor you're coming out of like you you grew so much in your 20s and now you're like fucking like ringing in this new decade of like you doing all of this work and becoming the person that you have known that you can be for all this time and like you're coming out into the world like exiting this cocoon and like I think that wanting to look hot on that day is a very reasonable thing to want thank you thank you I think I needed that little extra bit of validation too that it's okay for me to want that yeah also those two outfits you sent me on was it dolls kill uh-huh so fucking hot I

was like hell yeah either of them so I ordered it today and then I'm gonna order my little accessories later but yeah probably after this but I definitely know I'm gonna be more comfortable and warmer definitely definitely and initially my whole idea was like we're gonna go to a drag club and like it's gonna be big like the great Gatsby and then I was just like but I want to talk to my friends and that's just like not my brand like I could do I'm somewhere in the middle of like going to a loud drag club and partying my ass off and like being tucked away in a little cabin I'm like I don't know where and that's like the ultimate like pinnacle of being a Libra you know yeah where on the spectrum do I need to be yep totally I want both how can I make that

happen I mean like you kind of can make that happen like maybe like Friday can be like the nice like talk to your friends indoor day because everyone's gonna be so hyped to be there and then Saturday like we go and like get freaked up and then also like your friends are flying in to see you you're gonna be with them Saturday during the day so like I think it's really easy to like think of these events as like flashbulb moments but like you have the whole weekend to like live all of your wildest fantasies you know yeah yeah exactly and I also like the place I picked for Saturday I think it's gonna be like a good middle point where like everyone will want to meet and then if we want to go get even more weird we can go out I have yet to hang up my

outfit that I got you know like after I tried it on for you I've just left it laying out because I'm so excited oh my god I love that energy just like manifesting the vibes of the birthday by leaving it out oh yeah I'm like letting it charge in my window still like a crystal I'm like let's fucking go I love that I I'm super annoyed that I've been sick the last two days because I'm like this is really fucking up my workout schedule oh heard but you're getting better so I'm gonna we're gonna manifest some like healing you're gonna be all the way better tomorrow I'm gonna I have a bunch of crystals I'm gonna like lay them all out like under my pillows before I go to bed tonight yes hell yes I have like a wand selenium maybe I'm saying that wrong I don't know

but it's like this kind of like milky white uh crystal I used to have it in a ball but I can't find it but it makes me fall asleep so fast wow I just hold it and I pass out I love that but maybe it's also just a placebo effect well if it works it works that's what I always say the fair enough I think that's a really good uh way to think of it and I was also thinking like regardless of if crystals like actually like have the power to do stuff like it has the power to put you in the mindset of where you need to be to accomplish the thing that you're trying to manifest you know and that at the end of the day is the reason that those things exist it's like this is how this is a little controversial but like that's how i feel about religion in a lot of ways like

i don't i don't believe in any religion but like i've seen friends like i've had friends pass away that have like found religion right before they die and it gave them comfort and i'm like great that's exactly what they needed in that moment and yeah i'm so happy that they found it it's the same I mean it's not the same but it's the same kind of thing as like a crystal it's like if it's giving you the energy and the purpose that it's serving a purpose to make you feel a certain way then why not I think they're all the same thing like as long as these are things and tools that you're using to help you feel grounded and connected to other people and like you like do your best to be a good and caring person yeah like like at your core like before doing something

you consider how it might affect those around you yeah like if you're making a big decision um and there's always the middle ground like of course you should consider what's best for yourself too but there's like uh yeah just like not intentionally hurting other people or like intentionally being selfish like i i don't know yeah it's like you're never gonna like stop learning your entire life yeah if these are tools whether it's religion or like astrology or whatever that helps you get in touch with like connecting with other people and like some sort of like higher belief that like we our lives have meaning that then it doesn't matter what you believe as long as you're being a good person yeah I completely agree and then like the other

side of that too is not fucking gatekeeping people's comfort yes let people just believe in whatever the fuck they want to believe in also like someone liking astrology does not impact you at all and people are so strange about it yeah yeah i my most triggering tweet was um something about pisces men and pisces men are a disease yeah and then someone got so mad about it i was like excuse me it's called a joke and they're like so like being mean to one type of person as a joke to you i'm like oh my god can you what the fuck this is why people this is why you're spending all your time arguing on twitter with someone talking about pisces instead of hanging out with friends right and like if it's not real then like it shouldn't

affect you exactly you shouldn't be so mad about it if you don't believe in it then why are you so pressed yeah right like I can't I truly I truly don't know how people get through the day I really don't anyways they're still a disease they I stand by it well the good news is is Amelia took my birthday off I am so Liz when you said it was a religious holiday I was like oh my god it is and I'm so flattered it's your 30th birthday that is such a good use for a PTO day I'm like hell yeah fucking get paid to get drunk on Liz's birthday all day like anyway I'm very excited we're gonna have a lot of fun um I am going to be I'm gonna say this now just to hold myself accountable I'm gonna be videographer of the night and make like a really epic like video

at the end of it oh my god I love that for us and then you'll have that for forever and then everybody that can't be there i.e all of you that are listening almost you can feel like you were there because you know i always have my camera out so you can count on me let's uh let's live stream parts of it for them on tiktok wait that's a great idea we should live stream on instagram and tiktok that'd be so fun at least for part of it for like 10 minutes at a time like maximum that would be so fucking funny when it gets real weird yeah just like the drunker we get and people can pretend they're like drinking with us you know it's like a it's like a mukbang oh my god yeah for blacking out a mukbang for blacking out what i i sense the title yeah i know

there is always a moment in every episode that i'm like that's gonna be the name of the and then you always name the episode it and i'm like we were on the same fucking wavelength so um you've heard of weaponized incompetence right no like i'm sure you've heard of it on tiktok maybe in passing so it's yeah the idea of like usually the conversation centers around like men like heterosexual men being like if you go if they go to the grocery store they're like well they get the wrong thing and then they're like oh I'm sorry I'm just like a guy I don't know yep what that is and like you don't have eyes I sent you a picture yep um or like or if they're like well I'll help well, I'll make dinner. Like, what do you want? And it's like, I don't want to have to tell you

what I want and I don't want to have to tell you the ingredients. I want you to be able to just do it. Yeah. Yeah. And for me to not hold your hand. So people are just giving examples of weaponized incompetence and that it's like a purposeful act. And I was thinking more about it like I don't really experience this at all with Mr. Liz um a cute story a little sidebar uh when we first started dating he made me he was like oh do you want like um stir-fried tofu for dinner and I was like that sounds great and it was just tofu and rice and I was so constipated after I ate it I was like this is so good thank you so much that was like very early on in our I had not heard that story and then I was like I think later on I was like you need to put some

vegetables in this and he was like wait what and then I was like yeah you can't just have tofu and rice like you need some more stuff like and a sauce and then um we like have been cooking together a lot like just throughout our relationship and he's like just seen me cook and has helped me a lot and so then he made me tofu and rice he made me stir-fried tofu yesterday and it was like stir-fried with all these delicious veggies and he used like a special sauce yes it was so fucking good he killed it and then i was like yes i was like remember like when we first started dating and you made me tofu like stir-fried tofu and he was like yeah i was thinking about that earlier and I was like look how far you've come this is so good and then he's like proud I'm I'm

just proud of him not that he I think he just needed someone to like get his creative juices flowing in the kitchen you know for sure and also like there is a I feel like acts of service is my love language because somebody like remembering something and putting in the effort to like do better next time is like the best it just is it shows so much love and and just like knowing what you like to eat like I I try to be very health conscious about what I'm eating and like him knowing that and like making me a meal that keeps that in mind is so thoughtful and I think that's all people want so this is like this circles back to like weaponized incompetence it's like you know just because you don't want to do something like we're not asking you to do it

because or no one's asking you to do something because they are just like frustrated with you it's because like they care about you and they want you to care about them too and yeah and just that kind of like consciousness of like oh well my partner um doesn't like to eat meat like most of the week so I'm gonna make them like a vegetarian meal and I will also enjoy it like just things like that like it's it's not hard to be considerate of your partner and if you feel like it is you shouldn't be with your partner right I completely agree and it's like really truly for people that are just like thoughtful people it seems so obvious like it seems like it's like not even a thing but it is it's so rare like there was one day a few years ago

I had a it was like when my ex and I first broke up I had a crush on someone and we had we were like at a bar and he went and grabbed me a drink without me telling him what I wanted and all that was available was beer and cider and he like grabbed a bunch of beers for everyone and grabbed me a cider and he handed it to me i was like oh you remembered and he was like yeah i saw you drinking that yesterday and i was like what which is such like it's such a basic human decency thing but it goes such a long way when somebody just like internalizes something they know that you like or something that bothered you that they did in the past and they fixed that behavior it just goes such a long way and it's it shouldn't even have to be like conscious you know no right i've

just being like oh yeah I like I feel like I could confidently like get you a gift or like make you a meal you know because we just know each other and I've been around you and we have eaten meals together like it's not like I'm trying super hard yeah right um right I know I've mentioned this before but I'm gonna say it again like uh friends with benefits would be fine if men knew how to be friends it's so it's so true yeah you can yeah you can be friends with a woman and hook up with her and still just maintain friendship and it's called yes it's called just being a friend caring about another person can you hear can you hear grandpa yes i sure can hi baby oh y'all this is my first time recording as a cat mom oh yeah oh wait did you not record

as a cat mom last week no I recorded two days before she moved in with me oh my god it's been she's she's given herself a bath right now she's such a good baby she's 11 and she has she she's an old woman here I am telling you telling everyone about your cat no please you always do better at summing things up I'll talk about her for like two hours if I can I'll give I'll give you the basic stats she's a tortie she is um 11 her name is a few things but i'm calling her what i knew her before she got her permanent home which is meows and uh she stopped dead in her tracks she's like i heard my name she's like what is she saying in there she is um an expert biscuit maker and um she uh is super food motivated because she was a stray so you can't leave food

out she'll eat the entire bowl like i've never seen anybody run so i have a timed feeder for her in the morning so i don't have to wake up and you would think that the place was on fire she runs so fast when she hears that automatic feeder go off i'm like girl you are going to pull a muscle you are 11 good chill out anyway i love her so much and i'm really loving the cat mom life because you were asking me like questions about my cats and i just leave bowls of food out for them and then they just feed themselves yeah it's that's really nice i have to she has like a very strict schedule yeah that's not to say they don't eat a shitload i'm looking over at grandpa he's just like sprawled out like a blob he i would i say i think even though they're both very large

cats they're not necessarily fat cats no they're not big yeah they are yeah and gramps is part main coon isn't he yeah so that makes sense he's just a thick boy okay wait i do want to talk about weaponized incompetence a little bit more so it like separately mr liz and i had a different conversation that's very similar to weaponized incompetence and he called it sandbagging he's like have you ever sandbagged something and I was like what do you mean and he's like have you ever done something terribly so then in comparison when you do it well the next time it looks like you have made a huge improvement because I feel like so often at work like in workplaces people who are rewarded are the people who like fucked up when they first started and then they made

they made a lot of improvements and then now they're at a level of just like regular performance and people are like wow you came so far and then you're like what the fuck like i've been doing better than them this whole time god yes just because you're punishing me because i've never fucked up yeah it's not fair that is so fucking real that's like everybody is always like set expectations low and that's exactly that it's like well you know it could only go up from here and it's like no just do well the first time so he was asking me if I've ever sandbagged something and the answer is no I've never done anything terribly on purpose at first and I also like that's if I if I don't do something well it's not on purpose and I just don't want to do that

thing ever again you know I want to be good at something the first time yeah no heard that's exactly how I am that's why I've quit like every sport I've started yeah yeah exactly yeah I mean like yeah the examples that you gave because I think sandbagging is like a very similar phenomenon but like with the um weaponized incompetence it's like when you started telling me what it is every example that came to my mind was so like problematic that i've experienced like um fake dom like using those like condoms that there was all this controversy around them already being used and repackaged did i tell you this story yeah yeah like and like he said it in a way that's like it's not funny like he like didn't think like he didn't he was just being an idiot about it

intentionally and it's just like because he just didn't want to accept any responsibility for anything because he was just going to like bumble around and be an idiot but like he's not an idiot he was a very smart person but like it was easier for him to just not accept responsibility for shit yeah and specifically choose to ignore things that he knew would be like like people would challenge you know yeah exactly so then if he's just if he's just playing dumb then it's not his problem right right um and we said the same thing about uh what the fuck was his nickname french press like how he like if you call him out for like being like disrespectful of your time he's like you're right i'm sorry because if he just like if he just doesn't argue with you

and also it doesn't need to be an argument it's like i'm looking for some self-awareness here yeah and yeah for him to just be like you're right i'm sorry like then he he can just leave and he doesn't have to change anything he doesn't have to acknowledge anything he doesn't have to try it's made like a full revolution around gaslighting yes it's like gaslighting for like uh for like seattle guys like i don't know what's yeah it's like for it's a more elevated gaslighting yeah yeah it's like sophisticated gaslighting it's a way to gaslight smart women into not arguing with you that's what a competence i can't fucking deal i wonder what that dude's up to i think enough of us are just kind of like uh yeah i don't want

to be your mom because i don't want to be anyone's mom i don't want to be a mom to you or any children so you can either get with it or get out get with it or get lost gramps is biting my zipper on my like uh jacket right now i don't know what he's doing he's so weird rambunctious baby oh somebody's coming in to join us she's like i heard there's a cat yeah is there a man involved yeah what are you doing he's a little young for meows come here and also uh they're both neutered so i have an update on a past man's oh okay you know it but i've been thinking a lot more about it since we first talked about it so if you've been listening to the podcast for a bit you remember the comedian whomst i had like a pretty long thing with yeah we were seeing each other for like eight months

non-exclusively and that was always you know the thing of contention it was yeah it was always a point of contention and also like i was always honest about it like i was never hiding anything from him um but it turned into a thing anyway um we ended things fuck like a year ago like a very long time ago and um i was walking to a bar the other we hadn't talked since we ended things I was walking to a bar a couple of weeks ago and I walked past a comedy club and I heard his voice and realized it was him and so I was like holy fuck and I had been wanting to reconnect with him for a while because we ended on good terms yeah and he's like a likable guy yeah he's really great I have nothing bad to say about him to this day it's just like wasn't I

wasn't looking for a relationship and he was and that was really that was it um so I took a picture of him from outside and I was like thought I heard a familiar voice like you look like you're killing it in there um hope you've been well and he just never responded and he still hasn't responded and I saw that he has a girlfriend now which is great and she seems fucking dope she seems like super smart and he seems really happy which is great but like fuck like it's such it hurts so much to like end on good terms with somebody and then have them just like create this narrative in their mind that makes them hate you over time and I can understand I mean so much shit has happened since then but like we haven't talked he hasn't like tried to ask what maybe

happened you know what I mean like we just haven't talked so I don't know he has me muted on everything he still follows me on everything but he's but he's muted me how do you know that he hasn't he hasn't watched any of my stories for like a year so I eventually muted him because So it's just like, I don't need to be watching what he's doing. That reminds me of a tweet I saw that was like, you're in his DMs, but he has me muted. So he doesn't see my stories. We are not the same. I recently thought of one of like, you're left on read in his DMs, but he's talking to me in a baby voice.

We are not the same. oh my god yeah have you ever thought about that when like you can tell if like a guy is really in love with you because they start talking to you in a baby voice oh yeah yes and like calling you like a stupid nickname that's so true i love my pet name what is it pachuti pachuti that's right oh i love that you little cuties he also calls me um petite pommes frites which means small french fry in french and that's so cute i call him coach cheeseburger why um one time i i said something like i like smelled i knew i smelled really bad because i had just worked out and i was like i was like no i need a shower i smell awful and

then he like leaned in and smelled my armpit and i was like why would you do that and i was like i smell like a cheeseburger and then he thought that was really funny so now anytime one of us is like sweaty after working out we call each other a cheeseburger or we say like I'm a cheeseburger right now I remember you telling me this because you told me this on the way back from Nikki Glazer and I was like now that you've said that every time I smell BO it's gonna smell like fast food and and that has been it smells like that's been the case every time I've smelled BO I've been like It smells like stale french fries, and Liz has ruined sweat for me for forever. Not that it was ever a good smell, but all I can smell now is fast food.

Fast food. Yeah. I wanted to talk to you about comrade etiquette, because this has been a point of contention online for a bit. Katie Thurston was the one that actually, I think, brought this back into the rotation of conversation. and she had a good point and I was thinking about all of the guys that I've hooked up with that have stuck around for a while have always been the ones to mop up their own cum off of my back or wherever they come every guy from the beginning and then every guy that has been like a one or two night kind of deal has thrown me the cum rag and I hate it like now that I'm actually able to like

pay attention to it like because now it's at the front of my mind it really bugs me when people just throw me the towel like you clean up your mess idiot what do you think well how do you feel about cum rag etiquette I now I'm thinking about it and I like have never thought that much about it I hadn't either like for me it depends on where it's at like if it's like on the front side I I can get it I don't mind I don't want you to smear it around like an art painting like a finger painting um so but if it's on my back like clean it up wet part of the rag and first you use the dry part and then you use the wet part you know to get the extra so it doesn't get all like pilled up on your skin um because I don't yeah I've never thought too much about if I like clean it up

myself on the front side of my body yeah but I also haven't had to do that in so long because I haven't been on birth control so and I just always use condoms and like track my ovulation so that is a good point i was thinking like well so squints is always he like always does like the he does a very good job with the cleanup it's very thorough he gets um he gets range so sometimes it ends up in the roots of my hair but like music man also always even if it's on my face cleans it up like he's always the one to and the comedian always cleaned it up like it's just interesting that the dudes have stuck around for a while now when I think about it I'm like yeah it is really nice it is it's just like a nice little gesture yeah if it's on the front side

you don't have to but you should take care of the things you care about amen so I just I think there have been a few instances where it's just been like here I got this from the bathroom and it's like it just feels kind of like dirty like to just be like I guess when you like you've been dating someone for a while though it's like you already know that they care about you so it doesn't really matter but like this is just like in hookups it's just like hello can you just I don't know it'll take you two seconds to just do it be respectful I'm just curious whatever the people think about it I want to hear other people's opinions on it this also really reminds me of a TikTok I saw today like uh a couple hours ago this woman was saying how um she

was talking to someone about how like there's a whole genre of romance novels created just by women that men dismiss and like make jokes about but then she listed a bunch of like really like sensual forms of touch that men can give that like when she was talking about them I was like am I like kind of turned on right now like one of them was like um if you rub your nose like against her neck and then like if you come up behind her like rubbing your hands down her arms and just like embracing her and like touching the like rubbing your thumb on the end part of her wrist like uh-huh that I like the things she was saying I was like holy fuck I love that kind of like it's it's so small yeah and like as she was listing it I was like it's not obvious like

forms of physical affection but they right they are things that you like you feel so good when it happens you know right and I feel like there has to be men that are also turned on by stuff like that so I don't know absolutely like I wonder why it's not because like you listing those things I'm like yeah like I'm gonna send it to you after this please do I sent it to Mr. Liz I was like I want this oh good we love that communication he is super affectionate but I was I think like me it's like oh yeah I always have I'm I want ideas of what you like so yeah we like we're very cuddly but our our like um being cuddly also isn't like sexual you know yeah so i really appreciate the type of physical touch that we do have like every single day of just being like really snuggled up

and liking being cozy but there needs to be like a difference of like oh this is sensual versus like this is just snuggling yeah yeah totally there's just like whenever anybody like squints the other day when I was he came over and I was working and he was just like leaving me be and just like being around and he just like came up behind me and just like kissed me on the cheek just like really briefly that those kind of things I don't think people realize like really feel so great and like mean a lot it's just like little non non-intimate intimacy yeah exactly like non-sexual intimacy non-sexual intimacy that's what I was looking for another one that you just reminded me of another one that the woman listed like kissing like your temple like tucking your

hair back and kissing your temple and she gave an example of like if someone compliments her and you're there be like it'd be like I know she always looks so beautiful and then like kiss her on the temple I was like oh lord it should be a it should be a bible for oh yeah everybody I yeah send me this I we should share it too because I think that this should this has reach totally it does have reach it needs a larger reach come here for your tips and tricks also I got to like what I would consider the most important part of come as you are I've been talking about this it's taken me forever to read this book I refuse to listen to it as an audiobook though I'm sure it would be more efficient but I got to like the most important part and I when we record in person next

I want to share this secret basically because I just feel like it deserves like the in-person conversation versus like uh-huh us facetiming and like bootstrap recording and not knowing how it's gonna turn out I know I have so many things in my phone of what I want to talk to you about that like I just don't want to do over facetime so we have a lot to discuss next week it's gonna be so fun but this was also fun recording and I'm glad that we at least figured out how we could do it remotely because it sucks to say this but there's still a pandemic happening and it's worse than it was before we just don't want to pay attention I do feel very lucky that we're in Seattle where like 70 percent of the population is vaccinated yeah and the rules are so strict but and they're about

to get even stricter when October 25th thank god like right after your birthday yeah exactly right I was like yes oh my god most places are requiring proof of vaccination good like tons of businesses so I did a rapid test and a regular test obviously I got the rapid test back today but it was like just purchased over the counter and it was $25 for two so I did one Mr. Liz did one that's a pretty good deal for a rapid test yeah no kidding yeah holy shit and then obviously I did the one that was free so I it's so fun like COVID rapid tests like at-home tests are kind of how I felt about like the 3D printer thing again like I'm like it was such a thing like one day we're gonna have this and now it's so accessible that i'm like what like we've progressed that far

we could just take these things out so far so fast it's amazing i love science i love scientists thank you scientists thank you scientists and doctors i'm so sorry everybody online pretends that they know more than you but that's all i'll leave that there sex factor of the week sex fact of the week sex I want to do very like 20s okay let's do it I'll let you lead uh like hello my baby sex fact of the week hello my baby hello my darling hello my prom time gal I would like a hat and a monocle please wow that might have to stick around as our permanent song this is from womenshealthmag.com so if you have an issue with this take it up with them some states are kinkier than others

oh wyoming alaska vermont west virginia and oregon are the top kink curious states at least according to what they search on pornhub interesting california surprisingly came in dead last but maybe they're expressing their kink outside of their search history so it's really just search history facts but i thought that was very interesting and i also want to know like what um oh wait it's linked christian gray may live in seattle but the rest of washington isn't all that interested in bdsm says recent data from porn hub yeah you got two hundred percent of this podcast says that that's false the largest online porn site recently analyzed all of their search statistics by state and by country to see where people are searching for videos featuring bondage

domination submission and more okay so it's it's specifically bdsm when they say kink we're not we're not watching it we're participating in it yeah that's why and i also think washington grandpa is being stop you're being a shit he's trying to bite me yeah ah what's his deal he gets overstimulated when he's in my lap so he gets all bitey anyways um i also think that like washington as far as especially as far as seattle goes like people care a lot about um being considerate of if people are consenting or not so i think if you just know like especially if you're into bdsm if you can be aware that it doesn't involve consent or something or if it seems like sus it's just i don't know porn is questionable often yes feels

fake so i could just also see like people who are into bdsm here not really want to like watch totally yeah they're like getting that fix um in the real world all right well thanks for listening hopefully this um this edit comes out okay follow us on instagram tiktok twitter at the holy hour holy hour podcast at gmail.com i fucked up that outro so bad oh it sounded great my solo episode i just got i was like home stretch and i fucked up the outro i was fucking kidding me the thing that i do every week okay thank you so much for listening um we will be in the same room next week and we have some spicy convo and it'll be liz's last episode in her in her 20s wild that's insane oh my god yeah yeah and when it comes out will be my actual birthday holy shit okay all

right well we love you we love you our children that's gonna sound so bad we love you bye bye Oh, yeah.