The Hoely Hour - E62 French My Dumps

Episode Date: November 12, 2021

Amelia helps kick off the show by dropping straight BARS. You've heard of OnlyFans, you've heard of FarmersOnly, but have you heard of OnlyFarmers? It's the only app for hot farmer content. Your ex would literally rather do a weird ritual than go to therapy, especially Amelia's. Let's talk about energy orgasms! They're basically an exorcism for your genitals. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

so last week when well it was yesterday for us but it's last week for y'all when we were recording we did our coochie rhymes and liz uh is much better at this than i am and so i did a little bit of homework i went home and i wrote three are you ready for this liz yes i'm gonna start out with the weakest one coochie stick coochie poke coochie different coochie strokes thank you thank you all right coochie spicy coochie mild coochie wet coochie wild it never gets old it never gets old all right this is the last one i'm so sorry coochie filthy coochie rich coochie basic coochie bitch Welcome to the Holy Hour.

I'm Amelia Sampson. and i'm liz ball i think you need to get on only farmers.com or is that what it's called farmers only write it down yeah i don't know i wrote it down yesterday with a question mark next to it i have no memory of what i was gonna talk to you about that but i wanted to talk about farmers only okay only farmers is the only fans version or the only is the farmer version of only fans i would pay a premium subscription yeah to watch like some farmer with no shirt on like cracking uh logs in half i i've i know i mean you're like it's the type

you know thor and bradley on um on tiktok probably i'm sure you've sent me his stuff we're mutuals now i'm obsessed with this man obsessed with this man he is daddy sorry daddy sorry he's such a daddy he has big beard crazy crazy body and he his whole thing is chopping wood i don't trust dudes with a crazy body he has a um have you seen that weird guy who just like eats like weird like liver and like oh my god i'm like you don't have to be john sends me that guy oh he sent me that shit too i was like i would be so happy just not knowing that this man existed i was like exactly i was like i didn't have to i could have just continued living my life happily and and now my eyes have been assaulted by this man who his masculinity is circled around

eating like weird food his whole so he can look like an erect penis and he talks about things like yeah this is raw pickled bull penis but he says it like it's like like it's nothing for him but it has to be right like that has to be an act it's raw penis it is raw penis girl we take raw penis all the time that is true and i don't even have that many muscles i feel ripped off what the fuck oh my god he's got to be doing something else oh man he has to be oh my god oh it's so unfair um that reminded me i'm not gonna say why i still have yet to talk about being fingered in a bar i was gonna wait for you to bring it up

um yeah uh it's really not that long of a story without like giving context on who this man is because um i shouldn't but he's been in a few stories not not he's been in a few stories on the podcast none that i've told i just knew that when he and amelia would like when they met each other that they were gonna like probably hook up in some capacity the stars ideally they would fall in love but that's not up to me to determine i'm in love with him you heard it here first ladies and gents i'm gonna make him listen this episode and non-binary babes you heard it here he's growing a beard right now oh do you think he's doing that for you no he was like he was shaving the stash i know and he was like i wanted to start off fresh for snowboarding season

and i was like oh that makes sense he's like i'm probably gonna grow a beard when it grows back and i said and you're like with the beard with like the sweating emoji and he was like more for you to sit on I think if some other stuff hadn't gotten in the way you two for sure would have hooked up yeah it was the the stars were not aligning on on that happening no and that probably was for a reason it probably was yeah and I got fingered in a bar so we so we were how it happened it's not even really a story we were making out in the bar and we were just like kind of talking dirty to each other at this table with a million other people were at this table what were you saying i don't even remember i have i remembered like hours later that it had happened no i

remembered the next day i had like a flashback of it i was like yeah you just blurted it out and we were all like what we were all stoked and then i texted him that and he's like well did you like it i was like i don't remember but i'm sure i did i want to publicly announce that i support this that's great that is that is good i mean it makes me feel like i'm in college again do you think anyone saw this happening no i know for a fact because now that when i remembered that it had happened i looked i was looking around i was looking around the table to see if anybody was noticing and everybody was in their own individual conversations so he was sitting next to me just kind of doing a reach under and i was like

i was like very caught off guard i wasn't like not into it you know because i was very drunk was this at the table that was lower or the one that was high up the one that was lower okay back because the one that was high up they were facing the whole bar so i was like people would have seen were you in like the back corner yeah we were by the not no we were um against the wall but like on the other side at what point in the night was this like it was very late into the night like i not too many people were left it was still when a lot of people were there so really the stars aligned to be fingered in a bar you're living my dreams but not to have sex i i do have like a little bit of like a public fantasy but in in the way that i'm like i like the idea of it but i'm

not sure how i would feel if it was actually happening you know yeah totally like i don't know if i'd be like oh my god people might find us and i don't want that yeah because then you get like a public indecency charge and that's the whole thing uh and you know after my after my butt plug incident yeah i i apparently i'm uh concerned a little bit yeah about were you concerned you were gonna get a public indecency charge obviously not you also forgot i forgot yeah no i don't remember being concerned i just remember being like should we leave and then there was a lot of drama yeah but then also it was like very early in the night like i mean it wasn't early in the night but it was too early in the night for it to be like appropriate for us to depart

and people to not be like where they go we i expect i was expecting it us to hook up us to leave yeah what time it was like two by the time we no it had to have been earlier than that i feel like by the time we left it was like 12 30 you and i left together and i don't remember being in the uber with i don't remember that either mr liz was like nope he was like amelia was with us in the uber the drama that happened just to clarify it wasn't really that no it really wasn't but it was more just like people are getting a little too drunk it was like the emotional kind of drunk yeah mr liz was handing out mushrooms in the middle of the bar to everyone so we in general across the board there was not a lot of discretion i was thinking about that on my way over here i

was like i cannot believe i haven't told that story yet i wanted you to tell it on your own time i didn't want to yeah here we are it felt right it did feel right yeah i did um so on the agenda today we have so much spicy shit to talk about yeah we really do even today yeah and after recording yesterday i'm so happy for us i know me too look at us go we have the letter burning story oh so the week that my ex blocked me on everything like ghosted me essentially and then sent me that email I had sent him this six-page letter that was like draft number 50 of this letter I had like written it and rewritten it and like ripped up versions and rewrote it like a million times and it was like everything that i had wanted to say to him and that felt like too personal to say

over text that i knew i wouldn't get a chance to say in person and then after it got delivered was when he ghosted so i knew that he got it and how were you tracking the delivery no but it was like like three days after i had sent it and he lived like two hours away yeah i was like i know it's there like the timing of him disappearing was like too perfect so I was meeting up with a friend from college that my ex and I both knew and we were drinking and catching up and talking about my ex because it's like what we have in common and they told me they were like they started to say something and then they were like oh never mind and I didn't say anything I just kept looking at them and they were like ah fuck it whatever I wouldn't I wouldn't say this

if it weren't for drinks and then they were like um that letter that you sent your ex he never read it him and his new girlfriend burnt it in his backyard which is the most unbelievably evil shit I have like we him and I were not like we are messy but like we were still in contact we had just recently hooked up yeah while he was with he was still like dating this girl yeah right and unbeknownst to you and then obviously unbeknownst to her he was fucking around and honestly i bet that him burning the letter was like in like a hail mary to be like oh no she's crazy she i'm not seeing her she just sent me this letter you want to burn it in the backyard so she just wants to break us up babe yeah nobody wanna see us together but it don't matter no that's what he

thought he was doing i got you well it's just so insane how like closely aligned like our experiences were i know i know i know it's wild i think about that often like our breakups were happening very like at a very similar time yeah like about a year after i went through what like a year apart yeah the same things were happening yeah insane the same kind of like series of events with like we you talked about this on a past like with like the cheating and with the like rushing into shit after the breakup with us you know like it's just i i don't know i i have moments and this is actually why i wanted to bring up this story like i have moments where i feel bad for my ex because like he'll he'll never have the experiences that i'm having learning about myself

being alone like he's never gonna have that he rushed into a new relationship and i am i mean i don't like him i don't like having empathy for my ex like i have none i feel really bad for uh his partner yeah that's who i don't feel bad for him at all i feel very afraid for everyone else around him that's real yeah that's super real i just like he my ex is so he's just like a lost boy and like it makes me sad that he is never going to get time to himself but that's not my problem the reason I wanted to bring it up was because I was talking to my therapist about this and because I hadn't seen her since I had gotten this little tidbit of news and she was like I feel like you have this idea of your ex in your mind where he's like this like cartoon

villain like dancing around a fire like doing this seance with your letter and his new girlfriend she's like what if you like you don't actually know what it was like what if he got the letter he was emotional about it and then he was like I really don't want to read this can you help me destroy it and his girlfriend was there for it and I was like okay that's fair because that's that's true that might have been the case what bugs me the most is him telling people about it that's the that's what is fucking insane to me yeah okay so it's one thing if he is alone and he's like I'm just gonna burn it fuck it like that's fine I get that yeah but for him to invite another person like his partner to do that and then to like go and fucking tell a bunch of people

is arguably so weird yeah and rude yeah it's it's weird that he's telling people yeah and he's like guess what me and my girlfriend did uh my ex sent me this like this very like long letter and i didn't even read it i just threw it on a fire in my backyard that's weird as shit and i was like when I was thinking about it because I also told Mr. Liz about this and I was like if you came to me and you were like um my ex wrote me this like six page letter I don't even want to read it let's burn it I would be like well let's pump the brakes like that's a that's a very like big reaction to have what are you okay yeah and why do you want to do this right I can't even imagine the headspace i would have to be in to be like i don't like if my ex wrote me a letter today i would not read it

right away i would freak i would call you be like the fuck do i fucking do with this but i would read it first burn it i'd happily do that i would wonder for forever what it said and i've been working with my therapist on trying to figure out what to do with this box of shit that i have like him and i kept these shoe boxes of like ticket stubs and shit and i'm certain he got rid of it if he burned the fucking ladder he burned the box what if he did all of that together maybe he might have that's weird it's super strange it's very it just like i'm all for doing whatever you need to do to like get into a good headspace and i want to make that clear do whatever you need to do when you're going through a breakup the issue is fucking bragging

about it yeah it's like and like for me to be going through this with the box of shit i don't want to remember i don't need any memories with him you know but like for it to be such a thing for me to try to figure out what to do with this and then to get this piece of news that it's like oh yeah he never read it he burnt it it's like ouch dude that was eight years of our lives you like I don't know it's just the disrespect of like flaunting it around is it just bugs me so fucking much did he are you did he tell your friend like in a bragging manner when the friend was telling me about my ex telling them about burning the box or burning the letter they were like yeah in true him fashion like he was being very dramatic about the retelling of this like

it was this like big like cinematic moment so it wasn't just like oh yeah like I don't know it was just like pretty sad I would like to know what specifically he said I know I yeah I've asked this friend a few things because now that I've kind of like started pulling up a thread a little bit I'm like I have a few more questions and I've done so much work to not snoop I just have a lot of follow-up questions out of curiosity because this is objectively strange yeah um and you also reminding me of a story a friend told me that one of their friends um like in college had like this on and off again girlfriend and he when they broke up for good he printed out a picture of her and masturbated to it and burned the picture and then told people so maybe men would just

rather do anything than go to therapy that is the strangest fucking thing it's weird that he told people about it that feels crazy yeah that feels objectively crazy i don't use that word a lot the person who told me this um they were like bro you just like created black magic like this is not you just did some voodoo magic shit yeah this is not safe what the fuck you opened another portal to hell seriously i've never heard of anybody doing anything like that i think people do ritualistic things like that in their heads all the time and i guess like if it makes sense to you that's fine yeah but still it's bizarre to tell i just feel casually disrespected really because like if it was like a six-month relationship and like it would still hurt

and it was eight years of my life and like this person didn't want to know like like that that relationship meant so much to us for so long and it just like i don't know he's always been so he's he has put how other people feel about him way in front of how like he treats people that he loves like all through college he was always trying to impress his friends shoe man did that to me that shit's fucking awful and now he would never invite me to hang out with his friends and then he used that shit against me when we broke up he's like you never tried to get close to my friends like are you fucking joking like this has been an eight-year thing of me because he didn't want you to cheat on him like he did to you yeah i mean he when we like took our break and he was

like this isn't to hook up with other people we're not hooking up with other people we just like need some time apart and then we didn't take any time apart and he was still fucking people i it's all i want you to know if you see this if you hear this i am going to throw hands i'm gonna fight you okay i i have a taser i have mace and for legal purposes this is a joke not even for like if shoeman ever crosses paths with me i'm going to choke him out and i'm not even gonna say it's a joke for legal purpose because i'm gonna do it speaking of that situation i don't know i don't i my therapist was like what are you gonna do because i'm going home for thanksgiving and i'm bringing mr liz and she i was like part of me is like worried if he's like

gonna show up where i am and she was like what do you think he'll do and i was like i don't even know i don't i think he has the audacity to approach me and i also think that he's a little bitch and would run away yeah i think it's the latter just from everything that i know about him how do you think he would feel how would i feel yeah i also couldn't even process that i was like I don't know I feel like I like I'm not too worried about it but I also feel like I would flip him off and then she was like okay I would I could do impressions of my therapist all day but she was just like all right all right and then I was like and maybe that's not mature but I don't really care I don't think I owe him anything no I was like I wouldn't say anything or cause a scene

but I would definitely flip him off yeah totally I think I would I think I would just be like yeah leave uh-huh god what a powerful place to get i'm still in the phase that if i saw my ex my heart would drop into my butt i'm sure that would also happen to me but i'd also just be like i also feel i'm about to say some insane shit and just just bear with me for a moment so i was watching a tiktok about like how if in a different timeline you die your soul doesn't die like merges with a timeline where you're still alive and I was like thinking about it and I was like maybe in a different timeline we like broke up and like a better version of me merged with the life I have now and like that's why it doesn't really feel like it happened to me maybe but also

maybe I just have uh distanced myself from the situation and gone through a lot of therapy and i'm taking ssris and it isn't that big in my life anymore i it's wild to think how far we've come from where we've been like that's that is crazy to think like you being in such like a place of strength and being like oh it could be all of these reasons that i feel so good now like can you you like five years ago could you imagine you right now absolutely not that's pretty fucking dope i five me five years ago could not imagine that my hair is this long that i am not with mr shoe man and i am in fact with someone who is like my perfect dream partner like at that point i was just tolerating shit i did not like and tolerating how i felt this also brings me to i

saw this tiktok today that was like um this girl i think i sent it to you it was like my loss you had me thinking i was asexual i so you sent me that phenomenal and that's exactly i was like that's so true like i was so miserable and i like wouldn't acknowledge that for whatever reason i think we've all been in that position where you're like you're just not admit they were in a bad place exactly and you are you have no sexual desire whatsoever and it's because your partner treats you like shit yeah yep so i'm like bro you thought me i was sexually dysfunctional this is not my loss because i'm getting the my ass whooped yeah hell yeah i am making so much noise when i have sex now and you're not imagining you're somewhere else

no i open my eyes on purpose when i'm coming because i want to see my partner's face like that's how into this i am yes and then i'm like oh nothing nothing's wrong with me yeah it was you this whole time but it's so hard to see that when it's like that's the person that you're having the sexual experiences with you know like fuck that fucking because i was the same way like a lot well a lot of my friends too have been in relationships with people that they haven't wanted to have sex with and they're like freaking out about it they're like i feel like i have to go to therapy because i don't i don't want to have sex and it's they get out of the relationship and they start fucking like crazy yep and but it's so hard to know it's so hard to know that that's the reason

but it's just also if you're not having sex all the time that doesn't indicate yeah it doesn't indicate something is wrong with your relationship no i think um but it if you're ignoring a bunch of shit that's wrong with your relationship and you're not enjoying sex the odds are that they're connected one comment was like i think it's like the top comment it was like how do i fix the or is there a way to fix this and the the creator said yeah dump him and i mean like this is also coming from like there are so many people who are in like happy and loving relationships but i like there are also so many of us who have been through so much shit in our early 20s oh my god and i think this is more of a message just for like your earlier

years there's nothing wrong with you sometimes you're just not dating the right fucking person yeah and you don't have to overlook a bunch of shit you can like break up with them and work on yourself and like maybe your paths will cross again if it's right or you'll find someone who is right for you yeah i was so like with with mr shoe man uh i keep saying mr shoe man it's just shoe man with shoe head he um like I just didn't think that there was anyone else who would want to be with me oh my god that's exactly how I felt with my which was so stupid because I'm significantly hotter and more talented and interesting than him yeah doesn't make any sense why I thought that no but then when when you really get into your head about it and you

get into that headspace it's impossible to think otherwise it's sad I I was I felt the same exact way with my ex I the issue that I run into a lot when I talk about him is like I was objectively happy like during our relationship and he was very good to me but it just wasn't right and I and we struggled with that a lot because he thought that we were right and I was like oh it just it was kind of like I felt like I was running into a wall I need to have more sex yeah yeah and like I couldn't get over the past like when he was bad to me i couldn't get over it i never took time to heal from that i don't know how like there are people who have moved past cheating and i don't know how they do that i don't think i could i respect it i like totally have no idea how they

do that i mean i thought that i was doing that and i wasn't like i had never gotten over it i'm not used to wearing glasses i keep banging my face on the microphone um thank you um but i was thinking about how like I feel like speaking of like the different timelines and like parallel realities like I feel like me and another reality or like me from the future or whatever knew that there was like great shit waiting on the other side of the breakup for me and like I I was really believing when I was still with him I was like nobody's ever gonna love me like this and like now this sounds cheesier than I mean it but it's like I'm loving myself how I wanted to how I wanted to be loved yeah and how I didn't think anybody ever could yeah and like I've become

one of my favorite people and like that is not anything that I would have expected to happen best feeling when you are one of your favorite people yeah you are your own best friend yeah and you like and that sounds like it sounds weird like that's not something I would have been able to process even three years ago yeah literally I bring this up all the time the random guy that I met at a bar when like mr shoe mr shoe man when fucking shoe face and i were going through a breakup and i was like he's like do you think you'll go back together i'm like i honestly don't know and he was like you your relationship with yourself is the most important one you have and like there's a reason i met that person and it was so like he could send this message to me because

i think about it all the time and it kind of like guided me along this like transformation of like spending time by myself and intentionally not dating and like not looking for the things I wanted to love about myself and someone else you know yes and instead just sitting down and like pushing through like the things that made me uncomfortable and like just spending time alone and and COVID happening while I decided to do that just like oh it's it really sped up that process it was like let's fucking go yeah yeah I know it's wild being forced to like spend time with yourself and that was the biggest bummer going through a breakup right at the beginning of this too because like my ex was quarantining with his new girlfriend and I did not know that because we

had hooked up while they were living together that's it's so fucked up but I was like so fucking sad knowing that I was so so alone and I honest to god would not have had it any other way like I'm so happy that I was forced to just be with myself you know yeah and not have any distractions that I would normally have like going to the bar and hooking up with random people I didn't have that like I had I was forced to be more intentional about who I was hanging out with and spend most of my time alone yeah you were alone and then also like doing so much to protect your family from COVID so you're taking like these extreme measures to make sure like and that's obviously the best thing you can do um and then I was doing like I was doing the same but not

because it was because I didn't have anyone to spend time with like my parents aren't here so you and I were just talking all the time yep and now we're here now look at us we have a podcast and we have little angels we have angels this is so meta we're talking about like what started the podcast on the podcast with the people who listen to the podcast that make the podcast what the podcast is say podcast one more time crack anyway so that's the that's the letter burning story damn we really got into the thick of it yeah everything that happens happens for a reason and we're here because um of a lot of pain and that's pretty dope um at my at my old job instead of saying kiss my ass or like i used to say eat my entire ass and then my team took it a step

further and they would say french my dumps which i think is amazing french my dumps so this is a message for amelia's ex french my fucking dumps i love that i'm gonna start saying that oh my god oh i hate it i never want to be in a relationship again it's painful you're in a relationship with yourself and it's not painful that's true that's a good point it's like uh when emma watson said she's self-partnered people are making fun of her and i was like no but she's right yeah she's so fucking cool she's too hot for anyone else that's so real no one deserves to be with her and she knows that yeah so she's self-partnered yeah so i stumbled upon um this phenomenon i'm sure a lot of people know about it called energy orgasms do you know about

this liz i i have heard of it but i don't know anything else i don't know how it works i don't know the details so in the most basic of terms um people that i guess they're like energy healers maybe but maybe they're not exclusive to energy healers will just like wave their hands over someone and the person who's laying there will like have a full orgasm and it's that allowed it feels illegal and is that what they're trying to do yeah is give you they're trying to give you an energy orgasm what are the benefits of an energy orgasm um i don't know i don't know i mean i think that it's just supposed to like open i don't i know open your root chakra the reason i wanted to bring it up was because i just really want to watch you watch this because it's so

uncomfortable i don't even know which one to look at i think all i think all of them are basically the same i haven't watched this one so we're watching this together for the first time but it has 17 million views so you know it's good she look it's it's like he's performing an exorcism she's having the fucking time of her life i just don't believe this is real i've seen there's so many so gwyneth paltrow's um goop goop she has this new like netflix documentary of like couples healing their sex life and they're they had an an energy healer on there and her and her life slash business partner like performed this energy orgasm in front of this couple and it is the best fucking thing I've ever seen but it's on Netflix yeah I should send you um

my inspo for everything clearly Cody Ko had like a reaction video to it which is how I know about this it's so fucking funny but I am so oh fuck I wanted to read some of the comments on it i'm so curious about this phenomenon like how because people really it's like people believe in this i wonder i want us to find someone in seattle who will do it because i just want to like i love woo woo shit but i just don't believe this right i don't know if i want to get it done i'll do it really yeah i i want to know okay for research yes oh my god i don't know why i'm so nervous i guess it's not entirely disbelievable because or unbelievable because you can have an orgasm in your sleep you're not doing anything that's true has that happened to you yes a few

times oh yeah i can i can remember twice that it's happened to me and it's the weirdest thing do you remember what you were dreaming about when it happened uh just suddenly well after i had sex i would like uh it would be i would i was having like sex or something in a dream oh and then i would come but then before i had like i remember it happening when i was like a teenager okay and in those dreams it would just like randomly happen i'd be like i feel so weird yeah yeah yeah yeah i'd be like what is that and then the first time i had an assisted orgasm and i was awake i was like oh that's what that was okay it's i've had one of these but i was asleep oh yeah this feels vaguely familiar like dream deja vu both times this happened to me i have no idea what

i'm dreaming about i just wake up and i'm like i feel like it's go time yeah it's go time i'm like i'm having an orgasm but yeah the first time it happened i was a teenager so it's definitely i think it's definitely it's like a wet dream yeah it's possible it's like a wet dream so that that's why i'm like okay i guess like i guess i don't know how all that works yeah but like the idea of like an energy like i thought it was more like a partner gives you an energy orgasm rather than like a reiki healer yeah it's just so i want to know from the part from the healer that's doing it what that i mean like their whole life is dedicated to this like art you know what i mean yeah and i can you imagine what it must be like i'll be the like you must feel so fucking powerful

like i'm not even fucking touching you yeah i'm giving you an orgasm i most guys can't find the clit this guy's over here waving his hands over me yeah hey if you can't find the clit just learn how to give someone an energy orgasm yeah that's your that's your next i wonder if you could do if you so let's say let's say giving people an energy orgasm is real if just out in the daily world you know you're on the subway and you just look at someone and you're like i'm gonna give that person an orgasm it's like in bruce almighty it feels illegal it does that does feel a little that's an invasion of energy space oh i found how to have an energy orgasm oh okay i'm gonna enlighten us if you will oh my god my ads i need to start looking at these things uh incognito uh

listeners let us know if um you have an energy orgasm while amelia is explaining i'll read it to you like i'm an energy healer first you need to open your mind to the possibilities see i my mind isn't open fuck there's so much writing um i don't two practice with the food gasm a food gasm um one of the easiest and most benign ways to experience an energy orgasm is through the sense of taste slowly and intentionally feeding each other delicious bites of delicacies i hate how this is written and then watching the other person catapult into deep ecstatic reverie that can be literally orgasmic eating until you have an orgasm i do that every day just kidding connect with this energy during sex without touch i can kind of understand that like but i don't know

not to the point of orgasm no oh okay what does an energy orgasm feel like this is the good stuff maybe i've had one while we have associated orgasm with the quick burst of fireworks the climax there are all sorts of trippy orgasmic states that you can let yourself swoon into which are much much less a destination to reach but more of a spacious mysterious terrain to explore and your mind is where you flip the switch the first time i had energy sex with a partner i was amazed that i wasn't even being penetrated physically but i felt like i was through my partner and me using our awareness and intention the energy pulsing through me felt the same as when he'd be physically inside me we simulated all the same kinds of movements breathing and sounds

that would happen with intercourse and the energy followed right along into wave after wave of orgasm he even had his own energetic release at the end too sounds like you faked it no i'm just kidding i i know this sounds like the kind of sex mormons would have we don't even need to penetrate but the i wonder if the mormons would make energetic sex illegal also probably would because you're thinking about yeah that's true you can't have that energy penetration wow that i'm gonna name my scream over my it's gonna be the unholy hour and energy penetration i'd listen to them i would they popped up on my spotify i'd be like fuck yeah i'm listening like are you going to the energy penetration concert later everyone's like what's up we're

gonna go see energy penetration at wamu yeah the ep show they're headlining um speaking of uh religious things and getting around the rules um how do you feel about people waiting until their wedding day to kiss do you but you'll be disappointed yeah right yeah the people that are waiting are like oh my gosh it's gonna be this big magical moment like neither of you are gonna know what you're doing and there's gonna be all of these people watching you do it yeah that sounds horrible i also think that i just i just don't believe in repressing people's like sexuality and curiosity i agree like as long as you're not hurting anyone or yourself like that's the most important thing agree is being communicative and caring and thoughtful and

respectful of of each other and yourself and i just like don't understand why sex is so stigmatized when so many people like that's how we're all here we all came from a vagina we all came from the result of like some sort of penetration yep yeah and like i feel like if we were supposed to wait we wouldn't form a clit until like our wedding day well also there isn't an actual purpose of the clit other than pleasure right so god gave us that he was like here you go yeah it just it doesn't make sense no and no i don't know i don't think anything is wrong with sex and the fact that we treat like that the reason that sex is so stigmatized like it's it's rooted in religion and it doesn't make any sense to me no no it's creepy to care so much about what other

people do with their bodies exactly why do we care yeah why do we care people are like you gotta wait don't be a slut it's like how is this affecting your life in any way you're thinking about my sex more than i'm thinking about my sex weird super weird yeah super weird i mean that circles back to the conversation we had about like the jonas brothers and miley like being forced to take a stance on their sexuality as teenagers it's fucking weird very very strange anyways those are my thoughts if you want to wait until your wedding day to kiss that's fine do you do whatever you want but like do it for the right reasons yeah so we have a listener email from a while ago it's like uh the end of august yeah um but like this is why like we encourage you to

email us your stories because well one it's easier for us to keep track of and then um two like even if we don't read it like right away we might be able to read it later so i was going back through our emails and like i remembered how interesting i thought this one was and wanted to share it so um this listener wrote hi i just wanted to say i love the pod so so much i binged all 50 episodes in a couple weeks and have comments for you ladies hell yeah one thing i wanted to share was my experience with cheating i've been cheated on and also have been the other woman but i wanted to tell you about being the other woman i met a man about a year ago on seeking arrangements a sugar baby site which i would be happy to share experiences and tips with if you're

if you guys with you guys if you're curious and we absolutely are please definitely right blind spot for sure yeah definitely write back to us about your sugar baby experience and using um seeking arrangements because this is a sex positive podcast and like we if people are listening and they're curious about like doing that like we'd also like to be able to provide some yeah some tips for staying safe um anyways uh it stated in his profile that he was married on the site there are tons of married men it's not uncommon at all so i was messaging him and we hit it off before we met up i was hesitant because i had never knowingly been the other woman after talking with my friends i decided to bail he understood but a week later

he messaged me and asked me to meet him again i caved this time and went to his house for a platonic dinner his wife and two kids were out of town we hit it off and one thing led to another and we had sex he was very open about why and how he started straying he said their sex life was very boring and he's asked her to try new things and i guess she tries for a while and then it goes back to the same thing he had also been cheating on her the entire relationship with countless women trying various things threesomes anal oral just to name a few he referenced hockey and and went to the gym before work so we found some time to see each other every few weeks we had a threesome together with someone he used to see on the side i was definitely uncomfortable with the situation

uh especially since he has young kids and as a child from a messy cheating divorce i know that sticks with you in every relationship you have uh the last time i saw him i went over to his house during the work day i couldn't relax i was so paranoid about his wife coming home and also he couldn't hide the kids toys his wife's stuff pictures of them etc i felt awful leaving his house and i won't see him again the worst part is he told me his wife completely trusts him and has never doubted him i hope for his kids sake they don't find out i don't regret doing this but i'll never do it again um but the rest of this is really interesting so now for the scary stuff i went on a date with someone he came over i know not smart for the first date i have since

learned i cooked dinner we talked it was fine we had a mutual friend on facebook then he starts telling me telling me about his previous relationships common theme with them with all of them they're crazy even when he tells me that one of them has pressed assault charges against him automatically that's a huge red flag i ask him about it and he says he doesn't want to talk about it even though he brought it up so I keep that in the back of my mind and we continue our night we end up going for a drive he likes he drives like a maniac speeding and just being super unsafe he starts asking me to come back to his place which is about an hour drive from my house I say no I have to work the next day he keeps asking says he'll drive me home in the

morning call in sick etc I still say no and tell him that he can come back to my place we go back to my place and i end up with sleep sleeping with him afterwards he says he's not tired and he wants to drive home so he leaves the next day at work he's snapchatting me saying he's horny and wants me to send him pictures i say no because i'm working he got mad and didn't talk to me for the rest of the day i knew that manipulation technique and it almost worked but then i remembered the mutual friend and i texted her to ask about him she told me to search his name on facebook so i did i read probably 30 separate stories about women being assaulted by him in different ways choking women out abusing them locking them in his room rape literally anything you could imagine

short from actually killing them he even made a youtube video addressing these stories i listened to like five minutes and had to shut it off i wish i didn't sleep with him but at the same time if i had said no i don't think i would it would have been my choice after that even just from sex i had bruises and scratches on my chest from him I blocked him immediately and never talked to him again it's things like these that make it so fucking scary for women and it makes me so mad that this is what we deal with and some men are still out there defending this shit anyways I think that's enough stories for this time I'm sure you'll be hearing from me again please feel free to share these stories especially the last one it's so important for women to listen to our guts

love you guys can't wait for the new episode oh holy fuck i know see i was just about to and she said it at the end there it's like listen to your gut because it's really it sucks because i've been in situations that i'm like i don't pay attention to red flags because i'm like i'm just being nuts yeah you're like it's fine yeah it's probably fine i think everyone is guilty of that from one time for one time or another but it's what is i can't imagine then like looking up if somebody texted me like look on facebook i'd be like fuck my my heart would drop into my stomach and then to see all of that shit and know like it's a good thing she didn't go home to his place when he asked because who knows what would have happened there oh my god it's amazing that it

didn't happen at her house so i mean that's enough of like a gut instinct of like no i don't want to drive it out like i have to work tomorrow what's so scary about because if you really liked someone you'd be like fine i'll just be a little tired yeah but clearly she could tell something was off yeah so and like for him to do the groundwork of like talking about like his assault charges and shit because he probably knew that she was gonna google this shit or facebook this shit like it's just it's so scary what these people will do to like get ahead of the shit that they know it's gonna surface and then to be like oh yeah there are assault charges out against me oh no you know what I don't want to fucking talk about it it's like you brought it up that would

be what do you mean if I because I like I think you and I are pretty like we're we work in social media like we're in marketing we're just sleuthy and especially when we're dating so we're gonna like google the people that we're going on dates with and if I saw that a someone I wanted to go on a date with had assault charges yeah i would be like hold on yeah i'm gonna go find this person and ask them yeah i mean like it's so it's so fucking important to like i got um i have brands asking me to work with them a bit and it like doesn't a lot of them don't make any sense but i got approached by this background check company to make a video for them yeah and right know i mean once i like vetted them and saw that they were like legit i was like fuck yes because

like this is such an important part of dating is and people are like oh my god like people make mistakes in their past blah blah i'm not talking about like petty crimes or like non-violent crimes i'm not talking about like a marijuana charge like no i want to see if somebody has an assault charge like um like a child predator charge murder like there's shit that you should know and people aren't going to just like disclose about themselves online it's important to do this research and it's worth every penny to do it yeah and that shit's all public record so people are like it's a little stalkerish no it's public fucking record don't do the crime if you don't want to do the social media sleuth time yeah and like if if you think that looking out for yourself

is like stalker behavior i think that is a very privileged standpoint that's exactly what i said um because you have never been afraid for your life yeah wow that must be really nice not having yeah like that's so great I'm really happy for you but it that's not the world that we live in especially as women and not even just women we've obviously been very open about like how men have been assaulted non-binary people like trans folks like the the assault that trans folks have to deal with is atrocious so yeah it's it's everyone everyone's affected by assault and sexual violence at some point so i think that like it is smart to to look to google people's names to look for them on social media right and i did see a tiktok where this girl's like i stalk if i've

hooked up with you once i'm subscribing like oh yeah i've had sex with someone and they're alive i'm interested yeah so it's like there's nothing wrong with being curious and there's also nothing wrong with looking out for your safety 100 as long as you're not hurting other people yeah like that's that's my stance totally it's it's you're you're taking your safety into your own hands that does not feel nefarious no and people i don't know i think the people that are like this is docker is the people that have something to be worried about when people are yeah but are you afraid people are gonna find and they google your name i don't care this much jesus anyways uh we have a sex fact of the week and sex fact of the week

i always go for the high note i know it's amazing i don't know why i don't know it feels right i just i i my inner soprano it's like that's me hell yeah i can do a second soprano as well oh girl okay um sometimes if i have to take the lower vocals i will do it but i'm not as good at it it's my fucking girl like shit can i try it now yeah do it what's a good note for me to start on give me a note you do the same thing sex fact of the week wow that sounded cathedral as fuck amazing i like that i love harmonizing that might be my favorite one that we've done yet i like that too yeah it was good so we have to thank um on tiktok uh her name is dr jessica katanga so it's j-e-s-s-i-c-a k-a-t-a-n-g-a on on tiktok um

but what she shared that we're sharing as our sex fact of the week is there's like the myth that like you know um you become less fertile um i heard by 30 she had said by 35 but uh the most recent study on this so those facts come from a very old french study and these this the more recent study says that between 20 and 34 you have an 84 chance of becoming pregnant just between those ages and then 35 to 40 your chances of becoming pregnant are 78 percent and that's only a six percent difference that's pretty amazing yeah so like i think that those studies in the past probably potentially had an agenda but also as a species as we've just like developed like we like we might have had to account like our bodies might have had to accommodate for being fertile

at an older age like we're living longer we're starting our lives later yeah as adults so maybe like we've just grew into that as a species but also that it could have just always been true there could have not been any like alternative agenda there but also like dr jessica the from the video said that this the most recent research which was a bigger study is what said this and like when there's such a i don't know how big the french study was but like when there's a smaller sample obviously like there's so many extraneous things that could have such a huge effect like if somebody like has fertility problems later in life like just like just themselves as just that one sample is going to impact it right it's going to like really like

skew the results so for there to be a bigger sample size and a more recent because there's all of these things that could be we might be so many better to ourselves now we're not using as much plastics as we did in the past like people aren't smoking cigarettes like as they used to like there's so many things so it could be a million things but when you sent me this video i was like i i breathe a sigh of relief too because i'm like shit i'm already 30 and i like don't want to make this decision right now no I would like to make it later and after I am with a partner where I would like to make that decision yeah I want time to be in a place where I want to make that decision yes or no yeah totally so the fact that I have plenty of time is beautiful yeah

it's a good feeling so we all have lots of fucking time and she also continues in the video to say if you're getting pressure from your family I think she says aunties which I thought was so cute um she's like tell them that you're on your own time and to mind their own business and I was like yes I'm I'm subscribing yeah same yeah uh so I thought that some of our listeners could benefit from that um regardless of if you want to have children or not uh with a partner by yourself we all have lots of time yes we do so that it relieved us so maybe it'll relieve you as well um and that being said you thought that you could get away with the whole episode of not hearing me plug our socials at the holy hour on tiktok twitter and instagram holy hour podcast

at gmail.com to tell us all of your juicy juicy stories um liz i'm gonna miss you i'm gonna miss you too i'm gonna go a whole week without seeing you and it feels like it's gonna my hands are always so clammy when you want to do this are they just always clammy sorry that sounds mean but i'm curious no it doesn't sound mean because it's yes the answer is yes um sometimes they're either very clammy or very soft and dry because i feel like i have felt your very soft hands it's very strange but one day i'll um you'll ask to hold my hand and they'll be in a good state you have very youthful hands thank you so much thank you mine are wrinkly no they're not they're a little wrinkly they're not as youthful as yours your hands are so young it's because i'm constantly

moisturizing with my own fluids all right this is this is that's enough actually and prozac because i get night sweats for my prozac talk to your psychiatrist if you want youthful hands all right anyway we love you we love you our children i guess let's wrap you up for the low enough